Kim Possible: The Secret Files (2003) Movie Script

Oh, yeah, yeah
I'm your basic average girl
And I'm here to save the world
You can't stop me
'cause I'm Kim Possible
There is nothin' I can't do
When danger approaches
Know that I am on my way
It doesn't matter
where or when there's trouble
If you just call my name
Kim Possible
Call me, beep me,
if you want to reach me
When you want to page me,
it's OK
Whenever you need me, baby
Call me, beep me,
if you want to reach me
Call me, beep me
If you want to reach me
Doesn't matter where,
doesn't matter when
I will be there for you
till the very end
Danger or trouble,
I'm there on the double
You know that you always
can call Kim Possible
So what's the sitch?
Call me, beep me,
if you want to reach me
No, no problem.
No, thank you.
My life is so over.
Ron, turn down
the drama and eat.
Not hungry.
What am I gonna do, K.P.?
Well, let's see.
The guidance counselor
told you...
that you need
an extra-curricular activity.
Because it'll look good on
my college applications.
That's years away!
There's plenty of teams
and clubs out there.
You could join the Mathletes.
Right! I can't get in
that kind of shape!
- How about the debate team?
- I'm not gonna argue with you, Kim!
Afterschool activities
are great...
like cheer squad for me.
Cheer squad!
For me. Not you.
That's it! I'm upbeat.
I can do that.
- Do what?
- Cheerleader!
Yeah! Go Mad Dogs!
My life is so over!
I think it's cute that
Ron wants to be a cheerleader.
Mother, boy bands are cute.
Brown bear backpacks are cute.
Ron as a cheerleader-
not cute.
He'll wear a different outfit,
won't he?
Knowing Ron...
Hi, hon.
Pizza for dinner.
What do you want on yours?
You know I love bacon
on pretty much everything.
OK. See you
in 30 minutes or less.
Gotta go.
- Hello?
- Hey, Possible. Bob Chen.
Did you launch something
over there?
On the Q.T., Bob,
prototype G-6 rocket.
Went up like a dream.
Too bad it wasn't...
supposed to launch
until next week.
- Lean on a button again?
- Roger on that, Bob.
See you at the class reunion
this weekend?
Wouldn't miss it. Ouch!
The military is scrambling
around my rocket.
- Better hop off, Bob.
- See you at the reunion.
Same old Possible.
You cannot allow this, Kim.
Bonnie, I'm as freaked out
about this as you are...
but there is no rule
that says Ron can't try out.
Check your calendar!
It's not Befriend-A-Loser Week!
Ron is not a loser.
He's just... different.
- Ladies, let's boogie!
- Oh, yeah!
- They take a long time to get dressed.
- Hey.
Where's the squad?
I'm pumped!
They, um... they take a long time
to get dressed.
Are you totally sure
you want to be a cheerleader, Ron?
I'm not gonna be
a cheerleader, K.P.
You're not? Great!
I mean, why not?
Because I'm going
to be the mascot!
Middleton Mad Dogs!
Where did you get that mask?
I made it with
my Movie Makeup Magic kit.
What's the sitch?
I'm impressed... and disturbed.
Does it not rock hard?
Check this out!
Mad Dog foams at the mouth!
- Kim!
- Ron!
The crowd will eat it up!
Taste it.
It's banana cream.
Banana! Hey!
This idea is idiotic.
The entire student body
will laugh at you.
- But-
- Not with, at.
Loudly and cruelly,
they will laugh.
You don't deserve to be kissed
by a naked mole rat.
- Ron...
- I know, Kim. I know.
You believe in me
and you'll work on them.
I kind of agree with Bonnie.
Oh, I see.
Dad, I have a problem.
Frankly, your mother
has the good advice...
vis-a-vis boy trouble.
This isn't about a boy.
It's about Ron.
Oh. Gotcha.
Everyone got down on Ron,
and I don't know...
maybe I should have
stuck up for him.
But you didn't...
He was foaming at the mouth.
I'm only human.
You know, Kimmy,
back when I was in college...
I had a group of friends,
my posse, if you will.
It was the night...
of the big science
department mixer.
In those days,
I wasn't exactly a ladies man.
Where's Drew?
He was supposed to be here
a half hour ago.
I knew he wouldn't come
through with dates for us.
What did you expect?
He cannot even come through
with a date for himself.
- This was folly.
- It was a nice dream.
The dream is real.
Drew! You found girls!
Found! Gentlemen,
tonight we make history.
I give you the future!
My name is Bebe.
Bebe, would you like to dance?
Affirmative. Bebe will dance.
As gentle as
a summer shower, no?
All right.
Go on, laugh away...
but one day my genius
will be recognized!
Bebe will be perfect...
and I will be
the one laughing.
I am Bebe.
Drew dropped out
and we never saw him again.
I don't think
he ever forgave us...
and in some small way,
we never forgave ourselves.
For a giggle fit?
No, no, Kimmy.
We laughed for days.
Long and loud,
with youthful abandon.
That was bad.
So you'll reconsider
Ronald's dream?
I don't think so.
His Mad Dog routine
is way stupid.
That's one person's opinion.
One entire cheerleading
squad's opinion.
Maybe you and your squad
just don't get it.
You don't get it!
"I'm Kim Possible.
I can do anything. "
Except believe in
my best friend!
Go, Wade.
- I've got a weird one.
- Me, too.
Professor Ramesh from the
Mount Middleton Observatory...
wants your help.
That name sounds familiar.
I think my dad knows him.
Ramesh's partner,
Professor Chen, is missing.
OK, Wade. Set up a ride.
I'll bring the Man
of a Thousand Faces.
No, thanks. I'll fly solo.
I won't be flying,
but I'll get there somehow.
Nice going, Possible.
And that's
the traffic update...
from your
"Eye Over Middleton. "
Thanks for the lift, Dallas.
It's the least
I could do after...
you brought that interstate
police chase to a happy end.
No big.
The guy didn't even know
he needed a new brake light.
Better check on the Mad Dog.
Ron? Come in, Ron. Ron!
Sorry! Can't hear you!
Bad reception!
Come off it, Ron.
I know you're doing that.
What? I'm only hearing
every other word!
Ron! Don't be a baby.
Stay back!
Professor Ramesh...
we have come for you.
Who are you?
I am Bebe.
Is there an echo in here?
Analysis subject-Kim Possible.
That hurts.
Not bad.
Bebe is perfect.
What are they?
Kim, don't think I didn't...
hear that baby comment.
I heard it.
Thanks a lot.
What did I do?
Those robots
took Professor Ramesh.
Are you happy now?
I mean, no!
Whatever. All I know
is that now we've got...
two missing scientists
and three killer Bebes.
Professor Ramesh.
Back in the old college days.
Check it out.
Oh, yeah.
That guy must be Professor Chen.
What? No way, that is not-
Wow, it is! It's Kim's dad!
This is terrible.
Can you believe he actually
wore his jacket that way...
with the sleeves pushed up?
Totally Eighties.
Kim's dad could be
the next target.
Gotta tell Kim!
No, wait.
We don't need Kim.
I know exactly what to do!
Subject-Dr. Possible.
we have come for you.
Kimberly Ann Possible!
Dad? Here?
Great. Kim found another
new recruit for the squad.
Daddy, hi!
What are you doing here?
- Where's Ronald?
- Not here.
That hole in
the roof of my car...
really grinds my beans.
I'll be sure
that Ron gets the message-
Wait a second.
He put a hole in your car roof?
He came to the house,
said something about a mission.
What mission?
- Who is behind this?
- It's obvious.
Some villain needs our genius
to help take over the world.
What else could it be?
don't flatter yourselves.
There is only one genius
in this room...
and it is I, Dr. Drakken!
Drew Lipsky?
Is that you?
He's Dr. Drakken...
and he's in
for a world of hurt!
So, Kim Possible is near.
Oh, yes!
Actually, no.
Wade, Ron's missing.
Can you find him?
Do you think I have him
micro-chipped or something?
Well, do you?
Yeah. Hang on.
And could you maybe
go a little faster?
Kim, it's a school zone!
I purposely programmed you
with a pinch of human emotion...
just so you would be
ashamed of failures like this.
It's slipshod is what it is!
- Slipshod?
- That's right, missy!
And I demand better
from my lackeys!
- Especially the robotic ones!
- Lackeys?
Let's not get testy.
I am a patient man.
You will get another chance.
Go forth and find Dr. Possible!
Why are you after Kim's dad
and his friends anyway?
Payback! For you see-
Wait. Dr. Possible
and Kim Possible are related?
- Duh.
- Don't "duh" me.
Possible is
a very common last name.
- So not.
- So-so, yes, it is.
It's pretty unique.
Enough! I shall prove it!
Where's the phone book?
Park it close.
We shouldn't be long.
Keep your keys, Dad.
He's been hit with knockout gas.
This is bad.
I'll say. They'd better
get this ironed out...
before our big
college reunion this weekend.
Kim, it was Drakken!
Drakken's behind this?
Fine, so in Middleton...
there's only
one "Possible" family.
Kim Possible! And-and-
Her father, Dr. Possible.
There's no way
I can be expected to conclude...
that my arch-nemesis
is the daughter...
of a guy
I went to college with!
Drew? Drew Lipsky?
He's the guy from college?
My arch-foe?
He didn't used to be blue,
I can tell you that much.
But I was blue on the inside.
Scorned by my so-called friends.
My... my posse.
But I vowed to prove
my genius to all of you...
and when I got
the reunion invite-
Since you dropped out,
you're not entitled to that.
Exactly why I planned
my own little reunion!
Bebes, return to me at once!
Who's the genius now?
These robots are perfect!
And their sole purpose
is to obey me!
if we are perfect...
why do we obey
one who is not perfect?
Drakken is unfit to command.
It's college all over again.
That man cannot build a robot.
He should take up cloning.
Bebes, no! Bad Bebes! Bad!
This is just too weird.
Where did little Kimmy learn
to kick bottom like that?
We got a roomful
of geniuses here!
Can't somebody
come up with something?
- I'm an astronomer.
- Ditto.
And you?
Let the ladies work this out
amongst themselves.
- Wade!
- Dr. Possible?
I need a sonic disturbance.
Make it loud. Ultra-high frequency.
Something to jam
a wireless network signal?
Please and thank you.
Dr. Possible's
attack strategy.
Destroy electronic device.
Dr. P! I'm open!
Hive mind command...
I'll take that as good news.
Now, Kim, you know
I don't approve of violence...
but they are deadly robots.
You go, girl!
Way to go, Kim!
You, too, Dr. P.!
What was that, Ronald?
Way to go, Dad.
What about
your college reunion, Drew?
I'll come to the next one...
when I'm even more successful!
A little help.
I can't believe Drew Lipsky
turned into a mad scientist.
Let alone our daughter's
But my man knew what to do!
Possible, you rock!
Oh, please.
Drakken was so obvious.
I mean, really.
The whole "Bebebe" thing.
The hive mind behavior
was clearly the result...
of a cybertronic linkage through
a wireless control network.
Poor Drew. Maybe if we hadn't
laughed at him back then...
there would be one less
mad scientist running around.
The fact that
I was so rotten to you...
that's not gonna
drive you to become...
some kind of mask-wearing
villain, is it?
If I said yes...
would you let me do
my Mad Dog routine?
That's not a good reason
for me to say yes.
I know.
Because you're my best friend.
That's a good reason.
Boo-yah! Mad Dog lives!
Please put
your hands together...
for your
Middleton Mad Dog!
They like him?
Kinda surprises me, too.
Let's keep it moving, people!
Stoppable, stow that gear.
Aye-aye, Mr. Barkin!
- My bad!
- Ron!
Sorry, K.P.
I am just totally psyched!
Tell me about it.
It's been so long...
since I've skied without
some crazed henchmen after me.
Naked mole rat good to go.
Look, Ron.
Alan Platt.
He deserves our pity, K.P.
So sad.
The biggest trip
of the school year...
And his parents
are the chaperones.
- Humiliation Nation.
- Tragic.
But better him than me.
- Kimmy!
- Mom?
What's the sitch?
Did I leave something at home?
Not at all, honey.
Your friend Bonnie called us.
The Platts came down with
the flu at the last minute.
So we grabbed our gear,
dropped the boys at Nana's...
and high-tailed it right over.
Wait! You don't mean-
Meet our new ski trip
chaperones! Smiles!
You know,
it just occurred to me...
some people might
find it humiliating...
to have their parents along
on a class outing.
Especially one
with a big photo spread...
in the yearbook.
You did this to me
on purpose, Bonnie!
You are so paranoid.
I think
your parents are... cute.
- What you got there, Dr. P.?
- My homemade snowboard.
- I'm ready for shreddy.
- Excuse me?
Dad's trying to act cool?
I'm doomed.
I know a fun travel game...
that Kimmy used
to love on family trips.
When she wasn't
begging for a rest stop.
- Incredible!
- I know!
Bonnie will pay for this.
No, I mean this.
Check it out, K.P.
We're heading straight
into the lair of the beast.
"The Snowbeast of
Mount Middleton Makes Tracks"?
Right. From the same
hard-hitting journalist...
who broke the Frog Boy story.
I was personally touched
by Frog Boy's struggle...
to fit into a world
that can never truly accept him.
Look at this picture.
It could be anything.
That's why the "Wonder"
is offering $5,000...
for a clear photo of the beast!
You don't really believe
all that hooey, Stoppable?
- Well...
- Thank you, Mr. Barkin.
Some of us have
real issues to deal with.
Like helping your parents
with the sing-along?
- Here we go!
- Join in, Kimmy!
Did you know that Kim has
a beautiful singing voice?
99 bottles of pop on the wall
99 bottles of pop
You take one down,
pass it around
98 bottles of pop on the wall
98 bottles of pop
You take one down,
pass it around
97 bottles of pop on the wall
Make sure you collect
all your personal belongings.
Ready to find that snowbeast?
Mr. B.? I don't get it.
Stoppable, do you want
the whole class after the 5 Gs?
I gotcha.
What about Rufus?
Tell you what, Stoppable...
you help me get that photo
and I'll cut you in for 2%.
How you diwy it
with your hairless pal...
that's your business.
Catch you later, K.P.!
Ron, where are you going?
That reminds me
of the cutest Kimmy story.
We're on
our first family ski trip...
Kimmy's two years old and
she takes off her clothes...
in the middle of the lodge.
Mom! Not now. Not ever!
Honey, two year olds
have been known...
to strut around stark naked.
Am I right?
Please... go on.
Shouldn't we have mules
or sherpas or something?
When I snow hike with Kim,
we get sherpas.
You're not traveling
with the pep squad today, son.
Up here,
you gotta earn your 2%.
Wait a minute.
You hear something?
Teeth chattering?
Knees knocking?
Bladder sloshing?
That's me!
- Get a move on, Stoppable!
- It's on! It's on!
Over there!
It changed direction!
Rufus! Rufus, you OK?
Where's Mr. Barkin?
It got away.
It's coming back.
Calm down, Stoppable.
It's a woman.
Thanks for noticing.
Well, you know,
you're obviously...
you know, female.
We thought
you were the snowbeast.
Not that you look beastly
in any way, ma'am.
Oh, please.
Don't tell me you believe
that silly fairy tale!
- No, no.
- No, no, no.
I'm Amy Hall.
Pleased to meet you, Mr...
Barkin. Steve Barkin.
- Say, Stevie...
- I prefer Steve.
That makes two of us.
Anyhoo, I got all
turned around up here.
Would you mind
leading me back to the lodge?
- Actually, we-
- Would be tickled pink.
Pink is my favorite color!
Excuse us.
What about the photos?
The photos can wait, Mr. B.
You got a lady on the line.
- Come on, Stevie.
- Stoppable...
The lodge awaits us!
Mr. Barkin, babe magnet.
Drop it, Stoppable.
Ma'am, please follow me.
To the ends of the earth,
You built your own snowboard,
Dr. Possible?
You'd be surprised what
you can cobble together...
with odds and ends
from around the space center.
I'd love to see it in action.
- Slow down there, Dad.
- Kimmy?
Yours is so much cooler
than everyone else's.
You don't want to bum out
the other guys, do you?
Gosh, Kimmy,
I don't want to bum anybody out.
Good, Dad. Real good.
Is everything OK, Kim?
You seem stressed.
You did that on purpose!
Now who's paranoid, Bonnie?
It was an accident.
- I owe you one.
- It was nothing.
Find your snow monster?
How much do you know?
I'm gonna buy y-o-u
a mug of hot cocoa, Stevie.
That's really not necessary.
I need to get back
to the slopes.
With mini marshmallows!
Hey! An Otterfly!
That's right!
You collect Cuddle Buddies?
I've seen them at the mall.
No big.
Seen them? Kimmy went wild
for those little things.
I'm the past president...
of the Cuddle Buddy
Collectors Club.
It's so nice to find
a fellow Cuddler!
You two must
have so much in common.
You meet the nicest people
at Cuddle functions.
I've never gone.
Kimmy, who's your fave?
Mine's Otterfly obviously.
It was a long time ago.
What was that one
you never let me wash?
- I don't-
- Pandaroo, that's it.
You still sleep with
that little guy, don't you?
So cute. Little Pandaroo.
Bonnie knows about Pandaroo.
Hope is lost.
That's harsh.
Can I borrow the communicator?
Your concern touches me.
Wade, what's
the snowbeast sitch?
I've got no historical
no local legends, nothing.
- You pulled Wade in on this?
- Only if he delivers.
What were you talking about?
Not about
the "Weekly Wonder" reward.
Barkin has me down for 10%.
- Ten?
- If I deliver.
Fine. Just call me
if you find anything.
Keep it.
Wade might want to share
some beasty breakthrough.
- Want to come track it?
- Don't you get it?
This weekend is now
strictly damage control.
If I don't stay on top of
my parents every minute...
I'll never be able to show
my face in school again!
I'm in Humiliation Nation!
Let's move, Stoppable,
before that Amy woman...
force-feeds me cocoa again.
I think we're getting close.
Something moved.
It didn't sound beast-sized.
It's just a dog.
Hey, pup.
What are you doing way out here?
Cheese and crackers!
That's a mixed breed!
No! You naughty,
naughty beastie.
You shouldn't have
run off like that.
You had Mommy all worried.
Amy, in the nick of time,
you tamed the beast!
- You saved me!
- Why did it listen to her?
Thank you, thank you,
thank you!
Why did she say "Mommy"?
You're a clever one, Stevie.
Get the camera!
Hey, that's mine!
She wants the reward!
Or not.
Don't be a pig.
Take them to the lab!
Let me go! Let me go!
Ron? Mr. Barkin?
I'll get Kim.
Nice outfit, Dr. Possible.
It's, like, retro chic.
I was making small talk.
Forgive me
if that's out of bounds.
- What do you mean?
- We'd better be going.
We wouldn't want Kimmy
to be in Humiliation Nation.
You heard me?
Smooth move, Kim.
- Wade?
- We've got a situation.
You can't go gallivanting
all over the mountain.
Imagine what people must think.
What is this place?
My homey little
genetics engineering lab.
Let me show you
my favorite part.
Sweet mother of pearl.
Every Cuddle Buddy ever made!
That's a lot of plush, lady.
I collected them all,
but it wasn't enough.
- Question!
- Yes?
What's up with the monsters?
I wanted more.
To go where no Cuddler
had gone before.
living Cuddle Buddies!
That's quite a leap.
Not if you're one of the world's
foremost biogeneticists!
They called me DNAmy.
They said I was mad
at the Cuddle Con.
- Lady, you are-
- Special?
You are sick... and wrong!
You're just a meanie, Stevie!
But I can fix that.
Wade, try searching
the Cuddle Buddy website.
They profile all major
How'd you know that?
I logged on a few times.
They're a good investment.
Good call, Kim.
- She's a biogeneticist?
- That's not all.
She was kicked out
of her university...
for unorthodox
splicing experiments.
Her nickname was DNAmy.
An out of control geneticist.
I should've paid more attention
to Ron's crazed snowbeast talk.
We need to hurry.
Is there a satellite...
that can scan the mountain
for geological anomalies?
Natch. Hoping to find
a hidden scientific lab?
- If it's not too much.
- You're on a roll.
Artificial reinforcements
in a large cavern to the north.
I'm there.
Wait! Why punish Rufus?
Barkin's the one you're mad at!
That's it, Stoppable!
Kiss your 2% good-bye.
We could have been
so cute together, Stevie!
Now you'll find out
what it's like...
to be genetically fused
with a hairless rodent!
You are one twisted sister!
Let them go, DNAmy,
or I'll-Pandaroo?
Superstar edition?
They only made 12 of these!
You like
Cuddle Buddies, Kimmy...
wait till you see
my genetic zipper in action!
- Rufus! You're a mutant!
- Gross.
Naked mole man!
My greatest
splicing success yet!
Hey, Snowy!
Looks like your mommy's
got a new favorite.
She doesn't care about you.
You're just another
collectible to her.
Stop it!
Stop it this instant!
There's room in my heart
for all of you!
Thanks, K.P.
We gotta get Rufus back.
- And Mr. Barkin.
- Him, too.
These materials are unstable!
According to my readings,
the whole place is gonna blow!
Mr. Barkin, no!
Rufus, I know
you're in there, buddy.
It's me!
That's my Rufus!
Rufus, you're OK!
And you're wearing
Barkin's clothes.
Then what's Mr. Barkin wearing?
Stoppable, I need pants!
Let's evacuate, people!
Just once, I wish the bad guy's
lair didn't blow up.
- No!
- You have to leave!
Not without my Cuddle Buddies!
- We made it!
- Great.
Now I've got to find
my parents to apologize.
You might not get the chance.
We'll never outrun it!
No way!
Get ready.
No time to stop!
Hang on.
This could get gnarly.
There they are!
Awesome ride, Dr. P.!
- Way to go!
- Cool!
- That was amazing!
- I could never do that!
Dad, you're amazing.
Oh, no big.
Come see me, Stevie!
Mom, I am so sorry.
Don't worry, honey.
Your father and I
were teenagers once.
Sometimes we forget
what it's like.
Isn't this a sweet moment?
- Bonnie!
- Mom?
what are you doing here?
I heard you kids
needed more chaperones...
so I rushed right up.
But you can't!
Bon-Bon, don't go
flying off the handle.
If everything
isn't just so...
little Bon-Bon
goes straight to pieces.
But why? Who called you?
There's too many kids
for just us to handle...
and I figured
if Kimmy got to enjoy...
having her parents around,
why not you, too, Bonnie?
This is going to be such fun!
You have to introduce me
to every single one...
of your little classmates.
You rock, Mom.
You rock, too, Kimmy.
Now, boys...
You said we should practice.
You also said we can't touch
the ball with our hands.
Save it for the field, boys.
- First time coaching?
- Is it that obvious?
Your lack of protective gear
gave it away.
Would you go get them, please?
Mom, they're your kids!
But I hate this place.
You go.
I'll give you $5.00.
But the place reeks
of burnt pizza!
Not the puppy dog pout!
That's mine!
but keep the engine running
for a quick getaway.
Kim! K.P.!
What are you doing here?
I come for the games...
but I stay for
the burnt pizza smell.
- I win!
- Rematch!
Have you seen
my dad and the tweebs?
Give me that ball right now!
I'm not just saying this
as your father...
but as your coach!
Come here!
Kimmy, the team needs a coach
until I'm back on my feet.
You cannot be serious!
I don't know
the first thing about soccer!
What's to know?
You're wonderful with children.
Those are not children!
I'm not even
sure if they're human!
Wade, what's the sitch?
Trouble at J.P. Bearymore's
Pizza Party-torium.
Tell me about it.
My dad's totally out of action.
No, Kim! After you guys left,
they were robbed!
Somebody stole J.P. Bearymore!
At least you still
have the backup band.
The bear was totally
carrying those hacks.
J.P. is the state-of-the-art
in animatronic musicians.
Whoever those thieves are,
they're not subtle.
No, no. A villainous laugh
needs to be deep...
from the diaphragm.
Try again.
The laugh is not important.
I have the bear.
Yes, but why stop at the bear?
I have no use for the otter
and the beaver was off-key.
Junior, a true arch-villain...
doesn't leave behind
a perfectly good otter.
I thought
this was my crime to run!
Of course. Provided
you make sound decisions.
Fine. I will get the otter.
- And the beaver.
- Whatever.
That bear is quite
a piece of work, Kim-
inside and out.
OK, so we need to think
about who might want it.
- Industrial rivals?
- Other animal bands?
Pizzapotamus! No!
- Ron!
- Not Pizzapotamus!
It's Senor Senior, Sr.
and Senor Senior, Jr.!
Looks like we picked up
a few passengers-
Kim Possible and
her sidekick-type friend...
whose name escapes me.
What is your name again,
young man?
It's Ron! Ron Stoppable!
That's right.
I will smash them
into a building.
Junior, no!
I do not like this at all.
You cannot
simply smash your foe.
- Why not?
- Give your foe a chance.
To do what?
To shimmy up the cable
and try something heroic.
- Shimmy up the cable.
- You're closer. You shimmy.
Have you seen me shimmy?
It's not pretty.
Hang on!
Come on.
We don't have much time.
They're in a helicopter.
We'll never catch them.
Who's talking about them?
Bueno Nacho
closes in three minutes!
- I'm starving!
- Yeah!
- K.P., this can't go on.
- What?
Studying in study hall!
It sets a bad precedent.
Don't worry.
It's not schoolwork.
- The Senior and Junior case?
- Wrong again.
Or as the English
call it-football.
You know a lot about soccer?
Oh, yes.
I will teach you all I know.
Let's see...
soccer is the world's
most popular sport.
You can't touch the ball
with your hands...
- Unless you're the goalie.
- Really? That's it.
The student has surpassed
the teacher. Nap-time.
Keep 'em coming, Ron.
- Are you the goalie?
- No, Kaitlin is.
Then no hands.
Cool! Let me try.
Your approach is all wrong.
Like this.
Take it, Tim!
I got it, Kaitlin!
Here's a give-and-go.
See? You pass it
right back to the person...
who passed it to you.
I could've done that myself.
There's no "I" in "team. "
And there's no fun in soccer.
Not with her hogging the ball.
Let me show you.
Do it like this.
Junior, I do not approve
of the sign.
Your lair should be secret.
But I want people to find me.
So it is a trap. Clever boy.
Father, it is my scheme.
Yes, of course.
I just want to see
if it is evil enough.
Please! I assure you...
it will be the greatest
achievement of my life.
Greatest evil achievement.
Oh, yes. Yes, indeed.
Keep it moving.
Use both sides of your feet.
Here, I'll show you.
- Is she scaring you, too?
- Oh, yeah.
I am so glad
I'm just the equipment-
Equipment manager!
Blow these up! Hurry!
I wasn't ready! Do-over!
There are no do-overs
in a real game.
Come on, hustle!
Heads up! Survey the field!
Keep the ball moving!
What's the sitch, Wade?
- How's the coach thing going?
- Getting there.
Visualize goals!
Visualize Senor Senior, Sr.
What did you say?
Triple-S has struck again.
Listen up, team!
I've gotta jet.
That kind of attitude says
extra header practice.
Now remember-hustle!
I'll be back as soon as I can.
That's not hustle.
Our company has invented
a revolutionary new gas...
that burns 100 times
brighter than neon.
Doesn't look so bright to me.
It's quite bright, isn't it?
Not as bright as
the stolen prototypes...
but very bright all the same.
What makes you think
Senor Senior stole it?
They left this.
Good day...
unless you're watching this
after dark...
in which case,
good evening.
So Junior.
You are no doubt wondering
why we have taken...
your super-neon-
What are you doing?
A video calling card.
It will be
my villainous trademark.
Have you studied
villainy at all, Junior?
- What do you make of it?
- Family issues.
My eyes!
- How's it going, Kimmy?
- Usual villain stuff.
I meant the soccer practice.
OK, team.
That should be about enough.
Same time tomorrow.
My legs hurt.
I can't even feel my legs.
How are my star players?
You two better
get a good night's sleep.
Tomorrow we go full contact.
Isn't soccer
pretty much no contact?
That's what
the other teams think.
You get one chimorito,
and they give you...
a dozen little packets
of Diablo sauce!
You can't possibly use
all this sauce.
Somewhere there's a landfill
of unopened hot sauce...
and someday I'm gonna find it.
If I put on a uniform...
I could pass as
a tall ten-year-old.
What do you think?
I think it's just a game...
and your natural
competitive Kimness...
has taken you
to a very dark place.
The team needs an edge.
- You're the coach!
- I'm a hands-on coach.
Hands-on soccer... interesting.
Wade, do you think
it's wrong to help my team?
- Like fund-raising?
- Like playing forward.
Then I'd have to say yes.
So... what's the sitch?
Watch this. Junior calls it
his video calling card.
Do you love the nightlife?
Love to boogie?
Then come on over
to Club Lair...
the globe's newest
and hottest disco.
- He loves the camera.
- And the camera loves him.
Club Lair is conveniently
located in Europe.
Drive a little, party a lot.
They shouldn't be hard to find.
Yeah, the map helps.
- What?
- I did not say a thing.
You did. You said, "Hmm. "
I did not mean to say, "Hmm. "
It is your evil disco, not mine.
Good. Now, ready...
steady... go!
Yes, very nice.
But where is the villainy?
Father, please!
I want to do this on my own.
Thanks for the ride,
Mr. Blumberg.
I owe you one, Kim.
I never would've...
gotten around
the world in 80 days...
if you hadn't saved me
from that hurricane.
Anyone could've steered
a hot-air balloon...
through gale-force winds.
I'm just glad Ron was around
to serve as a ballast.
This time I'm staying
inside the basket.
I hope this doesn't
take too long.
I promised the team
I'd do power drills today.
Power drills?
That sounds harsh.
No pain, no gain.
Kim, the team wanted me
to talk to you...
about your coaching technique.
What about
my coaching technique?
Too much technique,
not enough coach.
What's that supposed to mean?
They want to have fun, Kim.
Winning is fun, Ron.
That's your Kimness talking.
Well, I am Kim.
It's just a game...
with small children...
who cry when
they see you coming!
Fine. We'll let the team
decide when we get back.
Going down.
So, you taught
the animals to cha-cha-cha.
Now tell me
your villainous scheme.
My plan is this-
as the funny animals...
dance to
the pounding beat...
the crowd will be inspired
to do the same.
- And then?
- We will party all night long!
Everyone will dance?
That is your evil plan?
I will overcharge
for beverages.
Sorry to break up the party,
Senor Seniors.
What have they done
to Pizzapotamus?
And where's
J.P. Bearymore's banjo?
I'm so sorry...
but tonight
is my grand opening.
It would be most inconvenient
to give up now.
Did you see the thing
with the eyebrow?
Nice touch, no?
Other than wrapping
Pizzapotamus in polyester...
this doesn't seem very evil.
See? What did I tell you?
I'm sorry, my friends...
but this nightclub
is rather exclusive...
and you're not
on the guest list.
The clever threat.
Good, Junior.
Follow through with
a display of violent anger.
- I'm mildly put off at best.
- Throw something!
I just had my nails buffed
for the gala opening.
Junior, this is not a party.
This is not a disco.
This is not fooling around.
Sunglasses indoors?
How stylish!
No longer will you interfere,
Kim Possible.
Now you are under my control.
What have you done, Father?
The intense light
of the super-neon...
is refracted into
a hypnotic pattern...
by the modified disco ball.
You modified my disco ball?
But now they're standing still.
Everyone must dance!
Gotta dance.
Can't stop dancing.
Must boogie. Oh, yeah!
Did I not mention
that the hypnotic victim...
responds to
the first suggestion given?
They dance well
for hypnotized people.
Junior, now is not the time!
Europe's elite
will be here in a few hours.
Yes... to get down
with their bad selves.
No, to be hypnotized pawns...
in our plan
to take over everything.
But that is not my plan!
It is now.
- Ready?
- Whatever.
This is no longer my party.
Junior, you can party
all you want...
when we control everything.
I don't want to control.
I just want to-
No! Do not speak
the "D" word.
Ambassador, so pleased
you could make it.
The crowd
is starting to perk up.
Not for long.
Hello. Europe.
This is Senor Senior, Sr.
I am in command of a disco
filled with fabulous VIPs.
Can you speak up, sir?
The music is awfully loud.
In exchange for these
very important persons...
I demand that you name me
King of Everything!
I'll have someone get back
to you on this.
Kim? Kim!
Can't talk... dancing.
Oh, my gosh!
A hypnotic disco ball?
Help is on the way, Rufus.
Aw, man!
You rock, Wade.
Let's get this blackmail
over with...
so the party can start.
Patience, my son.
We are on the verge
of being royalty.
Fine. Whatever.
Then we can all-
Don't say it!
Sorry, Seniors.
Cancel the coronation.
Kim Possible.
You are so resourceful...
unlike some people
I could mention.
Always the put-downs!
But where is the praise?
- Where, Father?
- Now is not the time, Junior.
Senor Senior sounds like
a certain soccer coach I know.
Does he have
too much Kimness now, too?
Not exactly.
He's just a control freak.
You're... well...
Wow, that's weird.
You know, Kim Possible...
the disco ball is not
the only thing I modified.
J.P. Bearymore's gone rogue!
First they take his banjo,
now this?
Attack, my robotic animal pawns.
Not Pizzapotamus!
Ron, we can't let
those innocent people get hurt.
Not to mention
us innocent people!
Can you hack into the system
controlling the animals?
Kim, it's
the most sophisticated...
computer system I've ever seen.
It's a banjo-playing bear.
They took his banjo!
I can't hack the bear.
Let me try the beaver.
Father has made my party
a major drag.
Everybody dance!
Junior, what have you done?
I'm in!
Kim, I took out
the otter and the beaver.
- Sweet, Wade!
- Kim!
Bear! Bear! Bear!
I'll be right down!
No, Coach Possible...
this is my ball!
This is the last time
I let you run the show.
If you had let me run it...
none of this
would've happened.
Nice hustle.
I hate it when they get away.
Let's go.
I've gotta do
some hands-off coaching.
Good shot!
Next time, try for
the other team's goal!
You got it!
The important thing
is that they're having fun.
- I'm glad you see that now.
- Whatever.
You'd better perk up.
You're the coach.
Not anymore, Dr. P.
While Kim was learning
to let go...
the team let her go.
- Who's coaching, then?
- The guy with the banjo.
Way to go, team!
Kick that ball! Way to go!
Who is that,
that freaky thing?
Yes, that's right,
it's a naked mole rat
Come on, y'all...
Nice guy.
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap
Come on and listen
to the mole rat.
Hit it!
Yo, listen up,
have a holla from Ron
"Naked Mole Rap"
is the name of the song
Here's the story
in all its glory
Ain't hidin' nothin',
y'all know what the truth is
How Ron met Rufus
Never heard a cat bark,
never heard a puppy purr
My dad's allergic
to every kind of fur
So I searched for
hairless pets on the internet
Saw a jpeg of a pink thing,
gonna need sunscreen
What is that,
that freaky thing?
Yes, that's right,
it's a naked mole rat
Come on, y'all,
let the girlies sing
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap
What is that,
that freaky thing?
Yes, that's right,
it's a naked mole rat
Hey, wait,
I can't hear the girls sing
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap
I heard Smarty-Mart
was havin' a sale
On a hairless pink rodent
with a long skinny tail
It seemed to me
this could be a solution
The perfect pet for my dad's
sensitive constitution
So the manager
came to open the cage
He said, "You know,
this pet's hairless"
I said I couldn't care less,
handed him to me and said
"Be careful, don't drop it,
and do you want this cage?"
"No, I'll keep him
in my pocket. "
What is that,
that freaky thing?
Yes, that's right,
it's a naked mole rat
Come on, y'all,
let the girls sing
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap
What is that,
that freaky thing?
Yes, that's right,
it's a naked mole rat
I'm goin' to buy me
some bling-bling
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap
Super-freaky! Psyche!
Guitar, baby!
What are we missin' here?
Rufus, the naked mole rat
Can I get a boo-yah?
Can I get a boo-yah?
Look at the camera,
say cheese
Smile for the camera,
say cheese
Can I get a boo-yah?
Can I get a boo-yah?
Look at the camera,
say cheese
And smile for the camera,
say cheese
We go to Bueno Nacho,
chimorito and a naco
Always grande size,
and why not, I'm buying
Rufus in my pocket,
you can't stop it
Can't top it, don't drop it,
you might just pop it
Rufus and Ron Stoppable
With our best friend
Kim Possible
We're not afraid of any attack
I say, "Yo, K.P.,
we got your back!"
What is that,
that freaky thing?
Yes, that's right,
it's a naked mole rat
Come on, y'all,
let the girlies sing
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap
What is that
super-freaky thing?
Yes, that's right,
it's a naked mole rat
Come on, y'all,
let those girlies sing
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap
- Yeah, this ain't no
- No freak-o
Yeah, that's right,
it's the Naked Mole Rap
- This ain't no
- No disco
Come on, y'all,
it's the Naked Mole Rap
- This ain't no
- No Shego
Yes, that's right,
it's the Naked Mole Rap
- This ain't no
- No rodeo
Come on, y'all,
it's the Naked Mole Rap
Listen to the Naked Mole Rap