King Tweety (2022) Movie Script

1
Ooh!
Ho! Ho! Ooh.
[laughing]
[chuckles]
[classical music playing
[Beep Beep humming along]
[classical music continues]
[continues humming to classical music]
Good morning, Your Highness!
Ding-dong, ding-dong. Rise and shine!
Let's seize the day.
It's governing time...
[shouts] Oh, no!
[dramatic music playing]
The queen. She's g-g-g...
Gone!
[groans]
[upbeat music playing]
[humming cheerfully]
Hmm?
I tawt I taw a puddy tat.
I did, I did taw a puddy tat!
But where did that puddy tat go?
[grunts]
[grunting]
Whoa!
Whoa! [laughing]
[Sylvester grunting]
[yells, grunts]
[panting]
[Tweety laughing]
[squeak]
Oh!
Mmm?
[fish singing]
Fishtown ladies sing this song
Doo-dah, doo-dah
All the doo-dah day
[exclaims]
[gasps]
[chuckling]
High-ho, Floorbo, away!
[yells]
[grunts]
Floorbo! Ramming speed!
Hmm?
[exclaiming]
[Tweety laughing]
[singing] Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow
Treats for cats
-[song continues in the background]
-Hey! My jams!
[singing] Kitties love our treats
They're where it's at
[music stops]
[Granny] Boys!
How many times do I have to
tell you two to stop fighting?
Puddy Tat started it.
Sylvester!
Bad kitty!
Boop.
He turned me into a fruit salad.
Why can't you be nice to your brother?
You're family!
[scoffs] Some family.
My life was very much
significantly better
when I was an only child.
[upbeat music playing]
[purring]
[toy jangling]
[snoring]
[meowing excitedly]
But then Tweety had to show up
and ruin everything.
Hello!
Ugh!
Maybe you two are
antagonizing each other
since we've been cooped
up in the house for so long.
[sighs] It has been a long time
since we've all had an adventure.
If only some sort of fantastical
inciting incident would come along.
and add some excitement
to our dreary little lives.
[all sigh]
[anchor 1 on TV] Pew, pew, pew.
[anchor 2] Breaking News.
[anchor 1] Queen watch.
Pew, pew, pew, pew. A nation in crisis.
The Queen of the Canary Islands
is missing!
Bum-bum-bah!
Ooh!
Intriguing.
Good afternoon. I'm Melanie Blank.
Local police have been
searching high and low for Queen Aoogah,
who disappeared from
her palace bedroom under...
[in a spooky voice]
mysterious circumstances.
[normally] Aoogah,
beloved by both her citizen
as well as the international community,
has been nowhere to be found
for the last three weeks.
Oh! Tweety!
She looks just like you!
We now return to John Foray
live on the island.
What's the mood over there, John?
[all crying loudly]
Bad, Melanie.
Everyone here is super-duper sad.
It's really bumming me out,
to be honest.
So I opened the door
and the Queen was missing!
I was so distraught that
I fainted and bumped my head.
And then, I fell forward
and bumped my head again!
Then I toppled all the way
down the stairs...
[grunting]
...and my pants fell down.
But all this physical pain
I'm feeling is nothing
in comparison to the emotional anguish
of knowing that Queen Aoogah is gone!
[crying]
Canary Islands authorities
are frantically searching
for the next canary
in line to the throne.
Members of the royal bloodline
can be identified
by their tiny, delicate bodies...
petite, rounded beaks
adapted for eating
small fruits and seeds...
[munching]
...and their special tail feathers,
rumored to possess mysterious,
magical properties,
identifiable by
their distinctive marking pattern
resembling US President
and humanitarian, Jimmy Carter.
-[gasps]
-Mr. President!
If you think you or someone you know
may be a member of the royal family,
officials urge you
to call their hotline at...
[reading]
Ooh! I got to call in.
555-01
Hey-I-think-I-might-be
a-long-lost-member
of-the- Canary-royal-family
so-I'm-giving-you-a-call...
Whoops! Hit the wrong number.
I'll try again.
555-01...
Give me that!
Hello?
Bark! Is someone here
a long-lost member of the royal family?
Well, that was fast.
Hey! That's me!
[gasps] A king!
My liege.
The name's Harold.
I've been sent here
to bring you to your new palace.
[gasps]
There you'll experience
lavish, gourmet meals...
...untold riches...
Ooh!
...and a dedicated royal staff,
equipped to tend to your every need.
Wow! What a dream come true!
Wow! All that great stuff is for us?
Palace life, here I come.
Oh. Not for you, Mr. Kitty.
I'm sorry, but absolutely no cats
are allowed on the island.
What? So Tweety gets all this
fancy stuff, but not me?
Afraid not, sir.
But, sir,
Sylvester is part of our family.
We don't want to go without him.
Yeah.
That's the rules.
I can't do anything about it.
Now, come on.
Your solid gold airplane is awaiting!
Well, we tried our best.
Sorry, Sylvester.
You'll just have to hold down
the fort here 'cause...
-[Granny] I'm going on a vacation!
-[Tweety] I'm gonna be king!
Aww, sufferin' succotash.
[upbeat music playing]
[muzak playing over speakers]
Canary Islands, here we come!
Ooh! I'm so excited!
What are you looking forward
to doing on the island, Granny?
Well, Tweety. My favorite part
about going on vacation
is you get to do all sorts
of things you don't usually do at home.
You get to see new, exotic sights.
Try new, exotic foods.
And engage
in all sorts of new, exotic activities.
Incredible.
After all this time cooped up,
I am itching to bust out of my shell
and become Vacation Granny.
Hmm.
I wonder
what sort of person I'll become,
now that I'm the king and all.
Oh, I'm sure you'll do
a great job, Tweety.
You're such a sweet little bird.
Everyone will love you.
I know. I'm a cutie little patootie.
Welcome "a-bird," Your Highness.
Here's your complimentary bag
of "me-nuts."
Wow! It's me!
In nut form!
Being king is the greatest.
I feel bad that Puddy Tat
couldn't come, though.
I wish he was here with us.
Me too, Tweety. Me too.
Success!
Infiltration complete.
It'll be a chilly day in heck
before I let those guys
go on a fancy island vacation
without me.
Plus, there will be so many
delicious birds to eat.
Now, let me get myself situated
for this luxury flight.
[singing] Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow
Treats for cats
I'll just take a cat nap then.
[yells]
[grunting]
[groaning]
[yells] Plane snakes!
[exclaiming]
Oh, no! Bees!
[yells]
[grunting]
[groans]
[yells] Snake bees!
[screaming]
-Whoa!
-[snakes hissing]
[grunting]
[panting]
Whoa.
[exclaims]
Um... Good afternoon?
Toilet gremlin!
[grunting]
[screaming]
[exclaiming]
[pilot over PA]
Good afternoon, passengers.
We're about to hit
a little itty-bitty turbulence.
Nothing to worry about
as long as you're inside the plane.
-[both laughing]
-Good one.
[exclaiming]
[grunts]
Huh?
[exclaiming]
Phew.
[yells]
[both sighing in relief]
[sighing]
[screaming] Somebody help!
I'm stuck outside!
[screaming]
Mother...
-[snakes hissing]
-[bees buzzing]
[Sylvester] Oh, no! [screams]
-[blows landing]
-My eyes!
[crowd cheering]
-[man] It's him. It's really him!
-[woman] Hello, Your Highness!
Hello, Your Majesty!
I can't believe my eyes!
[man 2] Oh! He's so beautiful!
I'm used to getting attention,
but this is really something else.
Bark! Bark! Bienvenido
and good greetings, Your Highness.
Allow me to welcome you
to the Canary Islands.
Hello, puppy!
Pweasure to make your acquaintance.
The "pweasure" is all mine, fair King.
I am Diego Von Schniffenstein,
court magician,
advisor to the royal Canary family.
Whoa!
Wow-ee!
How unbelievably fortunate
that we found another heir
to the royal throne.
What are the odds?
Ooh!
The family resemblance is uncanny.
My number-one duty is to assist
His Highness in his transition to power.
Anything you could
possibly need, I'm your dog.
May I ask?
Did His Highness travel
to the islands all by his lonesome?
[enchanting music plays]
Oh! [giggles]
Oh!
[gasps] Dios mio!
Be still, my rapidly-beating heart.
Your Highness, who is
this vision in resort wear?
Oh! This is my granny.
My, my.
When did this become beautiful world?
I'm Diego Von Schniffenstein,
and your greatest wish
is my command, Miss Granny.
Oh! Thank you, doggy.
So adorable.
[laughs bashfully] Okay!
-[crowd gasps]
-Cat!
Izza! Green Bean! Get him!
Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!
Bark, bark. Bark!
Stop! That's my brother!
Your Highness, there's no cats
allowed on the island.
It's the law. He'd eat all the birds.
Well, I'm king and I say
you're not allowed to hit Puddy Tat.
He's my family.
Hmm.
Fine with me,
as long as he behaves himself.
[grunting]
Magic!
Izza! Green Bean!
Ball!
Ball! Ball! Ball! Ball!
Where did you say
the leak was again, ma'am?
Sylvester! Did you sneak
onto the airplane
so that Tweety and I
wouldn't be all alone
on our luxury vacation?
Uh... Yeah.
That's it.
Hooray!
Oh! Our royal limousine is here.
Hop aboard, courtiers,
and I shall take you
on a scenic tour to the palace.
-[chirping]
-Huh?
[chirping]
Ooh! A fun vacation activity!
This is exactly what I was hoping for.
I'll meet up with you two later.
Granny's gonna do
some scootering. [laughs]
[laughs]
-[tires screech]
-[Granny screams]
[grunts]
Bye, boys! Have fun!
-[engine revs]
-[Granny laughs]
Poetry in motion.
Now, let us away!
Wait! We still have one more person!
[beeps]
Really?
Floorbo got a seat
on the plane but not me?
We're all here.
Let's wiener.
Pip! Pip!
My Liege, everyone is
so excited you're here.
We've never had a monarch
from so far away.
[all] Ooh!
-Ooh.
-Ooh.
Ooh.
[birds chirping]
Ooh.
Make way for the King!
Magic! Magic!
Wow! I feel like a real celebrity.
[cheers and applause]
[shudders]
Huh?
[birds chirping]
[sizzling]
Hey! Sylvester, my lad!
The citizens aren't food, remember?
Uh... Uh-huh.
You know,
everyone on the island was so sad
when Queen Aoogah disappeared.
But now that you're here, Your Highness,
everyone's back to their normal
cheery selves.
You've really reinvigorated the place.
-Oh! Looks like a traffic jam.
-[horns honking]
What's going on up there?
[dogs barking]
[horn honks]
You know, for a place called
the Canary Islands,
there sure are a lot of dogs here.
What's that all about?
Fun little titbit actually.
In Spanish, this kingdom
is called the Islas Canarias,
derived from the Latin name,
Canareae Insulae,
meaning, "the Island of the Dogs."
So we both live here.
So, how does a canary
and a feline meow-meow kitty cat
become brothers?
The puddy tat and I live
in a brownstone in New York.
Ever since I was born,
he's been right here by my side,
protecting me and keeping me safe.
I really couldn't ask
for a better big brother.
Uh... Yeah, what he said.
How touching.
Oh! And we're moving again. Pip! Pip!
Say, speaking of family,
tell me about the lovely Miss Granny.
Such as, is she seeing anyone?
What are her likes and dislikes?
Does she perhaps fancy men
with severe underbites?
Uh...
-[horn toots]
-Oh!
Uh, we've arrived.
[all] Hurray! Our new King is here.
Whee! [laughs]
-[all] Cat!
-[scuffling]
[blows landing]
Stop it. Now! Stand!
[barking]
Fahrvergnugen!
Sorry, amigo.
The residents here
just aren't used to seeing a cat.
Now, come on, Your Highness,
Let me show you to your new home.
Boy, oh, boy!
My new home!
The escapades of
the Royal Canaries are storied and vast.
This here is General Chirp Bird.
an unbeatable martial tactician.
They fought back an army of dog invaders
100 times their own size and prevailed!
Ooh! Historical.
Ah, the good King Peep Bird.
A man of science.
He ushered the kingdom into an era
of unmatched scientific progress
and prosperity
when he discovered baking soda.
Wow!
Prince Regent Larry Bird,
who found great success
in your American sport
of "baskets ball."
Bird-tastic!
I heard he had solid fundamentals,
but his defense was lackluster at best.
Huh. Weird.
And this lavender lady is Queen Honk.
She was a famous daredevil and explorer.
She personally cartographed
some of the islands'
most treacherous biomes.
A-ha!
She was also the mother of
our most recent ruler,
Queen Aoogah.
She did so much for our fine people.
Island-wide ice cream socials.
Bi-weekly variety
theatre productions for the children.
High-octane street races for charity.
And I also understand that
she was an accomplished contact juggler.
She truly was the glue
that held our island together.
But enough about all that.
Someday you'll have a portrait
of your very own.
Wow! I can't wait!
I bet you can't.
You know, it's awfully bizarre
that the previous queen disappeared
from this heavily-guarded castle
without any clues.
Or leads.
We should really find out
what happened to her.
Would you like to
see your royal bedroom?
Yes!
This, Your Highness,
is your room!
[bossa nova music playing]
[both gasp]
[both] Ooh!
This whole fancy room
is for little old me?
It sure is.
Only the best for His Highness.
This bed is for me?
Yes.
These clothes are for me?
They are.
This pillar is for me?
I mean, it's purely structural.
But, yeah!
This bird bath is for me?
Everything here is for you.
This regular bath is for me?
Yes, both.
This bird bath is for me?
You already asked about the bird bath.
These flowers are for me?
[annoyed] Yes.
This plush carpet is for me?
Ugh.
This bird bath is for me?
Stop asking about the bird bath!
[sighs in exasperation]
All of the stuff
in the whole castle is yours.
That's how being king works.
Wow!
Now this is the life.
I could get used to this.
As you should.
As long as His Majesty, Tweety,
is in charge,
all this decadence is yours to enjoy.
For real?
Of course. You're family.
You hear that, bird?
Maybe you're actually
good for something, for once.
I love you too, Puddy Tat.
Speaking of being king, My Liege,
your Royal King Day Coronation Ball
is tonight.
You need to get ready!
[gasps] A royal ball! Oh, boy!
I got to look my best
for all my constituents.
Let's montage!
[rock music playing]
[chirps]
[upbeat string music playing]
[Harold] Cough, cough.
[clears throat]
[vocalizes fanfare]
Bark!
Bird ladies, gentle dogs,
non-birdnaries,
and all other lovelies in attendance,
I present to you our new leader,
King Tweety,
first of his name!
Hello!
[cheers and applause]
[woman] The King is here. The King!
He's so handsome!
[singing] There he is
The most beautiful king
In the world, yeah!
Hello. Hello. Hello.
Wow! Everybody loves me.
And the King's feline brother.
Cat man!
[silence]
Hmm?
Uh, it's Sylvester.
Vest something!
[silence]
[scattered applause]
And Granny! His Highness' Queen Mother.
Or Queen Grandmother?
It's unclear. I don't really know!
[engine revving]
[laughing maniacally]
[beeps]
[gasps]
And Floorbo's here.
-[all cheering]
-[whoops] Yeah, baby!
Scoot, scoot, scoot!
Wow! I can't believe all this
pomp and circumstance is for me!
Hey! Dude! Stop.
This is all so much fancier
than my old home in New York.
That's how it is when
you are king, my baby-headed chum.
Every day is a party.
You even get your very own court doofus.
Jinglemeister,
do some of your
insipid clown nonsense for the King.
[exclaims, grunts]
[Tweety laughs]
Genius!
This keeps getting better and better!
-Puddy Tat! Isn't this amazing!
-Hmm?
-[bird squawks]
-Huh?
I want you to know
I'm really glad you're able to be here
with me on my coronation day.
Are you kidding me?
There's no way I was gonna
miss out on all this castle fanciness.
I've got servants waiting on me
paw on paw.
And thanks for helping me figure out
my royal duds for this evening.
I really like playing dress-up with you.
Yeah, I... I suppose
we did have a nice time.
And we had so much fun
picking out my outfit,
I didn't want you
to feel left out, so I made you this.
Huh?
Oh. Wow.
Uh, thanks, Tweety.
That's actually really sweet.
You are my brother, after all.
If I'm a king, then that makes you,
like, a Dutch or a Duchess or something.
I will treasure it forever.
[Granny] Whoo!
Hey, disc jockeys! It's a party.
Play us a tune we can all dance to.
-[dog] Ahh!
-[crashing]
[disco music playing]
[singing] I'm sitting pretty
in my crown on the throne
Guess I'm a royal now
Who would've known?
I can't believe
all of this stuff's for me
Check out your fancy little
New bird king
When our queen went missing
We were so so, sad
-So sad!
-But now His Highness is here
-And that makes us so glad
-So glad!
Sail through the clouds
To end all our gloom
You brought the sunshine
That made us bloom
Boop-boop-shu-bop, what a great day
I'm really loving this grand soiree
I'm the king, let's shout hurray
It looks like everything's going
My way
I have to admit maybe Tweety's all right
This castle setup here is too dynamite
Hors d'oeuvres, fine clothes
Cushions of gold
I sure love living in my brand new home
Look at me now
I'm splendid, refined
I think I'm gonna leave New York behind
So many things to do, and birds to eat
Don't forget the rules
[chuckles] I'll be discreet
Boop-boop-shu-bop, I really got to say
Life is a tasty bird-flavored buffet
I'm on a permanent holiday
And for once everything is going
My way
[crashes]
[singing] Puddy and me
We're like birds of a feather
And now we get to be
[both] Royals together
Tweety, my pal
I won't lead you astray
'Cause it looks like
[Tweety] It looks like
[both] Everything is going our way
[song ends]
Hey, that was pretty cool.
Crazy, huh? We didn't choreograph
any of that ahead of time.
[bird chirps]
Oh! Can't believe this yellow dingus
appeared out of nowhere
to snatch the throne.
I thought when I got rid
of Aoogah, the kingdom would be mine.
Free and clear.
Hmm?
Yeah. Who does this Tweety
character think he is?
We'll just have to make sure
this new king has an "accident" as well.
[gasps]
I planned a series
of royal outings for the King tomorrow.
He won't survive the day.
Ha-ha!
Oh, no!
If anything happens to Tweety,
I'll have to kiss my luxurious
castle life goodbye.
Hu-ha-cha.
Tweety! Diego's a bad guy.
He wants to take you out
so he can steal the throne.
Who? Puppy? Nah, he's our buddy.
[laughs maliciously]
[gasps]
Bu...bu... bu... bu...
Yeah, Sylvester.
That little cutie couldn't harm anybody.
He's a good boy.
No, he's a bad boy.
You gotta believe me.
Lighten up and have some fun, Puddy Tat.
-Let's conga!
-What?
No. Tweety,
we need to get you someplace safe.
[Sylvester] Whoa! Wait. Tweety!
[crowing]
Oh, but I don't wanna go
to kindergarten.
[Tweety] All right, puppy.
What are my royal tasks for the day?
We have a whole plethora of fun outings
planned for you today, my liege.
First up we have...
[reading]
Ah yes, Mount Birdmanjaro,
the highest peak...
-[Granny] Oh, no!
-...across all the Canary Islands.
Home to the ancient
and noble Chiff Chaff.
On top of her volcanic perch,
she has watched over the island
and its peoples for centuries.
[grunting] Magic!
[panting]
Every Canary Island
king and queen must earn her blessing.
[eagle screeches in the distance]
Ooh. How do I do that?
Simple. You do
the ceremonial blessing dance
in the ceremonial blessing outfit.
But I don't have
a ceremonial blessing outfit.
Magic.
Whoo!
Here I come, big old Chiff Chaff.
-[ceremonial music playing]
-[Tweety humming]
[chuckles menacingly]
Very good, King Tweety.
The Chiff Chaff is most pleased.
[Tweety humming]
[vocalizes dance music]
[chuckles menacingly]
[Sylvester pants, sighs]
What's all the ruckus?
Huh?
[Tweety vocalizing]
Tweety!
[Sylvester panting]
-Ahh!
-[vocalizing]
[Sylvester screaming]
[screams]
[grunts]
A-ha, we're safe!
Ahh! Lava!
[panting]
[screams]
Ahh! My butt!
[vocalizing]
[grunts]
[Sylvester grunts]
-[panting]
-[bird screeches]
-[snoring]
-Watch out, Granny!
Oh, those two. Always in such a hurry.
Whoopsie!
-[trilling]
-[panting]
Ahh!
[Sylvester grunts]
Ah. Cha-cha-cha.
[growling]
[reading]
[Diego] These are the famous
Lanzarote grape fields.
Our grapes, people grow everything
inside these volcanic sand pits.
My, my. How exotic.
Whoops!
Here is where they turn
the grapes into the finest of juices.
Here, have a sample, Your Majesty.
Here you go. Enjoy.
-[Sylvester grunts]
-Oops. I guess I spilled it.
Oh, that's okay. I have another.
[Sylvester grunts]
-Ha!
-[Sylvester grunting]
[both grunt]
Ow.
[both grunt]
[growls]
[grunts]
[Sylvester panting]
[Sylvester] Ow.
[screams]
Ooh.
[groans]
Garcon, another juice cup, please.
Sorry, mister. We're all out of cups.
Ahh!
Phew.
Oh, well. What's next, puppy?
Uh...
[reading]
So this is another thing
all Canary Island kings and queens do?
Indeed, it is.
Sharkrobatics is very much a real thing.
And not a perilous stunt I made up
solely for the purpose
of putting you in danger.
Whoo!
Now it can get really reflective
on the water out there,
so I'm going to apply
this cream onto your body.
It's most definitely sunscreen
and not anchovy paste,
a delicious treat that all sharks love.
There you go.
I can feel the sun protection factor
seeping into my pores.
All right, let's go.
Push. [chuckles maliciously]
Whee!
Whee!
Ah! [grunts]
[laughing]
[grunts]
Whoo! Whee! [laughing]
[Sylvester] Whoa!
[grunts]
Oh, hey, Puddy Tat.
You here for some tandem ski action?
[growls]
Get ready
for a real stunt spectacular, you two.
Cha-chung!
Huzzah!
Whoo!
[Sylvester exclaims]
[Sylvester exclaims]
[laughing] Whoo-hoo!
[groans]
Huh?
[buoys dinging]
[screaming]
[exclaiming]
[screams]
[whimpering]
[grunts]
Wee!
-[shark belches]
-[Sylvester groans]
Got you this time. Ha-ha!
Hmm? [grunts] I can't see.
[Diego] Ahh!
[both scream]
-[thuds]
-[both grunt]
Hurray!
Hurray.
[groans]
It's night time.
[snoring]
[snoring]
[beeps]
I can't let Diego and his goons
hurt Tweety.
Maybe if I get some photo evidence,
everyone will finally believe me.
It's time to go...
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover.
Undercover, undercover, undercover.
Undercover, undercover, undercover.
[Diego muttering in the distance]
Undercover?
[indiscernible conversation]
[Diego chuckling menacingly]
[gasps]
[gasps]
Oh, phew.
Hmm.
[indistinct conversation]
Ugh. I can't tell what they're saying.
I'm gonna have to get extra sneaky.
Cat reflexes, engage.
[huffs]
So Green Bean, you came up
with this cake recipe all by yourself?
Mmm-hmm.
Hmm.
Well, I think it's fan-taste-ic.
[chuckles]
Mmm.
Yes, the cake is lovely,
but I'm still frustrated.
None of my treacherous
"accidents" are working.
I thought we would have
gotten rid of the King by now.
But his doofus cat brother
keeps messing everything up.
"Doofus cat brother"? [grunts]
[all gasp]
[Diego] Hmm.
Anyways, we're going to have
to resort to Plan B.
I just don't know exactly
what Plan B is yet.
Well, Green Bean and I had
a good idea. Check it out.
Normal-looking bird seed cone, right?
But then bam! Knife.
I feel like people
will notice, you know,
the very conspicuous knife.
[gasps]
[growling]
Gurgle, gurgle.
Here, perhaps we should return
to our evil plan board.
[gasps] Evil plan board?
Now, let's see here.
Undercover evidence.
What if you use like, a slingshot?
Like, a really big slingshot.
With a knife in it?
I gotta document this.
[Diego] Have we tried
dropping a brick on him?
I mean, he is little.
I feel like we could probably
just drop a brick on him.
[all] Hmm?
Bizarre. Hmm.
It may not be very original,
but we could do
some sort of bird seed dynamite thing.
Jackpot.
I could show this to the other guards
and Tweety will be safe.
Hey, Puddy Tat. Whatcha up to?
Ahh! [grunts]
[grunts]
Huh? Cat spy. Guards! Eat his camera.
-[grunts]
-Oh, no, you don't, cat.
[Tweety] Hello.
[Diego gasps] The King.
[giggles]
Well, well, well.
Here I was, trying to come up
with a sneaky way
to dispose of the King,
and you've delivered him
right into my hands in secret
with no members of the public
around to see.
[laughs]
[Tweety giggles]
[laughs]
And here I thought you were
some sort of useless bing-bong,
always getting in my way.
Uh...
This works out perfectly.
Phase one.
I'll get rid of His Highness.
Then I'll put all the blame on you.
After all, no one's going
to believe anything you say.
You're a cat.
Phase two.
The Royal Adviser, who is me,
will be next in line for the throne.
Magic.
[huffing]
I'll be sworn in as the rightful king
of the Canary Islands
and everyone will be none the wiser.
Phase three.
The lovely Granny
will be so distraught
at the destruction of your family,
she'll run straight
into my arms for comfort,
and I'll become your step-dad.
[laughs maliciously]
[gasps]
I'm not a fan of any of these phases.
We're not gonna let you get away
with all this treacherosity, Diego.
Yeah.
[Sylvester grunts]
[chuckles] We'll see about that.
[clears throat]
[high-pitched] Yes.
Hello? Police station?
I need to report a regicide.
A cat has eaten King Tweety.
Please send your most intimidating
officers posthaste.
It's been nice knowing you, puddy tat.
Izza, Green Bean,
to our super-secret base location.
Ha-ha!
Puddy Tat, help!
Magic!
Uh... Different magic.
Ahh!
[panting]
[groans]
[shrieks]
[breathing heavily]
[sobs] Tweety.
[whimpers]
Freeze, cat boy.
Huh?
Canary Island PD.
Officers Gnutz and Siedes
reporting for duty.
We got an anonymous tip
that the King's been eaten.
[groans]
[gasps] J'accuse!
Put him in the bird cuff.
Huh? No.
No. Officers.
You've got the wrong guy.
[gasps] Sylvester, what's going on?
This suspicious individual
ate the King, ma'am.
Sylvester, did you eat Tweety?
No! You've got it all wrong.
That's enough out of you, bird-erer!
We're taking you downtown.
Granny! I didn't do it.
It was Diego.
You gotta believe me. [grunts]
Oh, my!
[grunting]
[sighs]
Oh, hey, you're finally awake.
[gasps] Queen Aoogah.
You're alive?
Well, I mean, more or less, yeah.
Wait. Who are you?
The name's Tweety Bird.
They bought me here
after you disappeared.
I'm the new king.
Hmm.
New king, huh?
So you're a royal canary, too?
I thought I was the only one left.
I guess that would make us... cousins?
You're my cousin?
Wow.
-Cousin poses, quick!
-[both] Hoo-ha-hoo!
Family.
Well, okay, now that we're both here,
maybe we can find a way
to get out of this place.
Two comically-oversized heads
are better than one.
Yeah, that's very true.
Speaking of birdnapping.
How have you been staying
alive here this whole time?
Well, luckily for me, Diego
didn't realize he put the cage
right next to a giant bag of mixed nuts.
He's an idiot.
And I've been keeping myself sane
by reading this discarded,
slightly damp New York travel guide.
Such a strange, exotic land.
The hustle. The bustle. So intriguing.
Hey, that's where I'm from.
Whoa! No way.
You're from here?
Oh, you've got to tell me all about it.
I have so many questions.
Okay. Like, for instance,
who is this giant woman?
I mean, she's gorgeous,
and I love how green she is.
Oh, yeah.
New York's got an incalculable array
of wonderful elements.
We've got hot dog men.
Yellow beepie cars.
A rat that steals a pizza.
And the subway,
where if you make eye contact
with someone, you get to fight them.
How convenient that we had
this tiny slide projector here.
Oh, I must visit this place.
But the best part of New York City
is that I get to visit
all those fun places with my family.
Your family? Elaborate.
Well, I have my Granny
and my big brother, Puddy Tat.
Interesting names.
Interesting people.
They're the greatest.
We do everything together.
Although, I haven't gotten
to spend a lot of time with them
since I've become king.
I've been far too busy.
I'm really starting to miss them.
Aw. Granny and Puddy Tat
sound really great.
You know, I've never met
any of my family.
My mom disappeared
before I hatched out of my egg.
It's always been just me.
Well, now you have me,
and Granny and Puddy Tat, too.
Welcome to the family, cousin.
Aw. Thanks, cousin.
[both chuckling]
[Diego] Oh, what a lovely little
family reunion.
Boo.
Ahh!
Hey, let us out of here, you butt nut!
Mind your manners.
Don't peanut me.
Tweety, throw the tiny projector at him.
Hi-yah!
Stop!
Puppy, how could you?
I thought you were my friend.
We had that whole
dress-up montage together.
You helped put on underwear.
Sorry, lad. It was all a ruse.
I'm a bad guy.
I have to get you both
out of my way if I'm going to become...
King.
Ugh. Diego,
this is incredibly whack of you.
Sticks and stones, young lady.
I'm going to be
the most glamorous and popular king
this island's ever seen.
Everyone will cheer,
"Oh, what a handsome
and wonderful king we have.
Hurrah, hurray!"
And the lovely Granny will be my bride.
[kisses]
No!
Why are you doing this, puppy?
Because it's my birthright. That's why.
Uh, birth-what now?
Centuries ago,
we dogs arrived here and we were like,
"Hey, This is a nice place.
Let's make it ours."
When we got here,
there were a bunch of birds
all over the place, taking up space.
So we tried bonking them
with our swords and chasing them away.
But then, the treacherous native birds,
led by your family, were like,
"No!" And fought back against us.
It was extremely rude.
The other dogs were cool
with it, but not me.
A dog is supposed to be in charge,
and we were here first.
That day, I vowed I would be
the one to set things right
and return the monarchy to the canines.
Okay, first off,
your story specifically mentions
that there were natives here.
So you were, in fact, not here first.
And B, how are you in that flashback?
That was hundreds of years ago.
What are you, like,
immortal or something?
Yeah, I'm a sorcerer.
Of course I'm immortal.
-What?
-I made an immortality potion.
But then I lost the recipe
because the recipe card
blew out of my hand
and fell into the ocean.
It was this whole big to-do.
But that's not the point.
Immortality is nothing without power.
So I've been trying
to get my hands on the crown ever since.
Who do you think has been
behind the mysterious disappearances
of every single one
of the Canary rulers?
What? No.
General Chirp may have been
a master of martial matters,
but they were no match
for my arcane magic.
King Peep? I switched his dumb
baking soda volcano out for a real one.
Ahh!
Larry Bird.
I put a rock in his shoe.
Ow. My foot. Now I have to retire.
And Queen Hawk...
[snarls]
I snowballed her.
Oh, no! Ahh!
Every canary disappearance
in the last seven centuries
is all because of me, baby.
Which is how I was able
to collect all of these.
Ha-ha-ha!
[both gasp]
A tail-feather
for every monarch I've deposed.
I personally prefer collecting stamps,
but to each their own.
You know that idea that our feathers
have magical powers
is just a myth, right?
That's where you're wrong,
little miss. Watch this.
[chanting in other language]
[devolves into screaming]
Ha-ha!
Well, that was anti-climactic.
All that pomp and circumstance
for a dumb feather boa?
It's not dumb.
A properly-made boa
can give you up to 300 times more power.
[gasps] That's almost
400 times more power.
Plus, look how snazzy I look.
Ooh.
Man, you look whack as heck.
No, I don't. I look cool.
And glamorous. And not whack.
I'm what the kids call "minty."
Ooh.
Ooh.
Magic.
Get my ancestors off your neck,
you bungus!
With no more canaries left
after I kidnapped you,
I was perfectly set to swoop in
and become the new king.
But then this little dingle showed up
and threw a wrench in my plans.
[giggles]
But ultimately, it was to my benefit.
Since now I can take your feathers
and finally complete my boa,
and fulfill my maximum
magical potential,
which is even better.
[laughs]
You're welcome.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have a fancy boy
coronation to prepare for.
Smoke magic!
Bye, puppy.
Ugh, what a dweeb.
Don't worry, Aoogah.
My brother's out there.
And I'm sure he'll be here
to save us any minute now.
All right cat, what did you do
with King Tweety?
[muffled, unintelligible speech]
Mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm.
Ugh. I can't understand a word
he's saying with that cone on.
[muffled speech]
What I was trying to say, officers,
is that I didn't do anything!
I'm innocent!
We found you in the castle,
surrounded by the King's feathers
with him nowhere to be found!
Explain yourself!
I bet he ate King Tweety.
And I bet he ate Queen Aoogah, too!
What! I'd never eat Tweety!
And I couldn't have even
possibly eaten Aoogah.
She disappeared like a month
before I even got here!
You've got me all wrong!
I'd never hurt a bird!
You'd never hurt a bird, eh?
Then what do you have to say
about these?
Uh... These?
Look familiar, pussycat?
Uh, okay, those are all
a bit out of context.
Is that you in the bath?
Uh... Ha-ha! No.
Listen! Diego von Schniffenstein,
the Royal Advisor,
he kidnapped him!
He's framing me!
I dunno. Sounds like fake news to me.
Tweety's in danger! You have to
let me go save my brother!
A bird and a cat can't be brothers.
They can, and we are!
Come on! Just admit
that you kidnapped the King,
and we'll let you go...
to jail for the rest of your life.
I'm not going to admit to anything,
because I didn't do anything!
Fine. We have ways of making you talk.
[singing] Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow
Treats for cats
Ahh! Why do you guys have this song?
It's the first track on our state-issue
interrogation compilation!
Tell us where the King is!
I don't know.
[yells]
[screams]
-[yelling]
-[screaming]
Please stop bird-yelling at me!
I've told you!
Diego took Tweety, not me!
You have to let me out of here
so we can all look for him!
[screams] He's trying to attack us!
Put him in the iron torso.
[exclaiming]
[grunting]
Ugh. This isn't going anywhere.
Throw him
in the De Laurentiis budgie prison!
Maybe a night in the brig
will get you to tell the truth!
Ooh! I love that show!
[straining]
Stupid metal shirt...
Sufferin' succotash...
What am I gonna do?
Tweety needs my help,
and I'm stuck in here like some goobus.
I'm sorry I couldn't protect you, buddy.
And I'm sorry I've always
tried to, you know, eat you.
As much as I like
the high life, the castle,
the fancy parties,
I'd trade it all in a heartbeat
just to know that you're okay.
You are my brother, after all.
[Granny] Yoo-hoo, kitty cat!
Huh?
Granny?
Sylvester, I know you're innocent!
Look! I found this!
Also, I know you'd
never try to eat Tweety.
Oh! Of course!
No, uh, never!
Now, come on!
I'm busting you outta here!
Vroom-vroom!
[exclaims]
Hop on, Sylvester! Let's scoot!
Are you sure you know
how to ride that thing, Granny?
Oh, I think I've got the hang of it!
[sighs] All right,
my life is in your hands.
That's the spirit! Now,
let's go save our boy!
-Ha-ha!
-[screams]
[singing] Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow
Treats for cats
[scats] Meow, meow, meow
Treats for cats
[alarm blaring]
-Huh? The cat! He's escaped
-To the police cruisers!
-[panting]
-[Siedes laughing]
[tweeting]
-[Sylvester exclaiming]
-Whee!
So, any idea where Diego took Tweety?
I was hoping you knew!
I guess we're going to have to
comb the whole island, then!
-[siren wailing]
-[both exclaim]
Attention, cat!
Pull over
so we can throw you back in jail.
You're making us look bad.
Ugh! The po-po!
Always getting all up in my biz!
Siedes, Taze 'em!
Bang!
[yelling]
[groaning]
Phew! These two really have our number!
I don't know how long
I can keep them off our tail!
[groans]
Mr. 39th President,
I don't know what else to do!
We need to find Tweety and fast!
Please! He's my family!
Uh-huh.
Okay...
Granny! Follow that feather!
You got it! Whoo!
Whoo-hoo!
Deploy the police barricade!
[squawks]
Granny! Watch out!
No barricade's stoppin' us!
Check this out!
-[Sylvester screaming]
-[whooping]
[Sylvester grunts]
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Ha-ha!
[blowing raspberry]
All right! I've placed my
priceless vase in its new pedestal,
I put my baby to sleep,
and I finally finished building
my intricate and very fragile
toothpick statue of David!
Now I can finally relax!
[exclaims]
[deep voice] Waah.
That ship must be
where they've taken Tweety!
But there are no streets
out there! That's the ocean!
Streets?
Where we're headed,
we don't happen to require streets.
Did someone order a giant cheese?
Whoo!
[Sylvester screaming]
Oh! You really are good!
We're comin' for ya, Tweety! Whoo!
So, my theory is, I don't think
he actually wanted the girl.
He wanted Jessie.
He wanted to be Jessie's girl.
But then he got nervous
at the last minute and changed the song
because he was worried
people would tease him.
But he's not fooling anybody.
I mean, you never even
mention this girl's name,
and then you spend the whole song
singing about your boy Jessie
and what he's up to?
Like, we all know what's up, man.
Stop being such a coward
and tell Jessie your feelings!
Hmm?
Ugh. You've gotta be kidding me.
Kssht.
We switched out our ostriches
for penguins! Pretty cool, huh?
-Kssht.
-Ugh.
All right Sylvester, you ready?
I'm gonna launch you onto
the boat so you can rescue Tweety.
Wait, whaddaya mean "launch"?
Okay! One, two, three, go!
[screaming]
[grunts]
Good luck, boy-o!
[sirens recede]
Oh... Sufferin' succotash.
[gasps]
Oh! [straining]
Uh, good evening, ladies...
Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!
[grunting]
Huh.
-[exclaims]
-[grunts]
Swish! Swash! Sword!
[babbling]
-[grunts]
-Swing! Swashbuckle!
-[grunts]
-[groaning]
-[cannon fires]
-[gasps]
[exclaims]
[grunting]
[roars]
[screaming]
[grunts]
[whimpers]
[snarls]
[grunts]
Hey, I'm free! [exclaims]
Throw! Toss!
[grunting]
[whimpers]
[grunts]
[exclaims]
[growls]
[grunts]
Huh?
[growls]
[gulps]
-[grunts] Swing! Miss!
-[whimpers]
[exclaims]
[chuckles menacingly]
[whimpers]
Huh?
[barking]
[panting]
-[growls]
-[exclaims]
[gasps]
[barking]
[panting]
[growls]
Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!
[panting]
[grunts]
Chomp!
Oh?
[growling]
[gulps]
[roars]
-[exclaims]
-[roars]
[exclaiming]
[grunts]
[screams, grunts]
-[footsteps thudding]
-[grunts]
Huh?
[gasps]
[howling, grunts]
[screeches]
[howls]
[panting]
Phew!
[exclaiming happily]
[grunting]
[both shouting]
-[knocking at door]
-[both] Huh?
Tweety!
Puddy Tat!
Wait! Your brother is a cat?
Wait! Queen Aoogah is alive?
-Huh?
-Huh?
-Huh?
-Huh?
We'll explain later!
Just get us outta here!
You've saved us!
Puddy Tat, this is Aoogah!
Aoogah, this is my brother, Puddy Tat!
My name's actually "Sylvester."
He's never once said it correctly.
Nice to meet you! I guess
I'm your new cousin?
Swell, swell, very weird,
welcome to the family!
Now come on, let's get out of here!
-[Diego] Hey!
-[all] Huh?
Where do you chump think you're going?
Uh... Out?
Come on, Puppy, just let us go!
We'll be cool!
No way!
I'm not going to let you dum-dums
ruin my chance to become king!
Feather boa activate!
[all gasp]
[Diego chuckling menacingly]
[all exclaiming]
[laughs]
Ooh. Big dog.
Check me out! I'm fresh to death!
Your death, that is!
Magic!
[all grunting]
[chuckling]
How are we supposed to beat that?
[Sylvester gurgling]
I got this!
[sniffs]
[laughs]
[sneezes]
[laughs]
[grunting]
-Ha-ha. Ooh, you like this?
-Huh?
A little trick... [chuckles]
Behind the back... [grunts]
Magic!
[blows raspberry]
Hey! Don't pull my pants down!
[blowing raspberry]
Stop!
Hey, come on! Stop! No! Shoo!
Huh?
[both grunting]
Magic!
[grunts]
Huh? Huh? Huh?
[grunts]
Give it up, you clods! I'm the king now!
-Tee-hee.
-Huh?
Ugh. Magic!
-Tee-hee.
-Magic!
Magic! Magic! Magic! Magic!
[laughs] Huh?
-Tee-hee.
-Gotcha now!
Magic!
Doo-dah
Ooh! A callback!
Bark.
Aoogah!
Heh! Magic!
[grunting]
Huh. The net seemed
a lot bigger from up here.
Magic!
Hyah!
Magic!
[hisses]
-Magic!
-[grunting]
Magic!
Magic!
[all croaking]
-Magic!
-[gagging]
Magic!
[laughing] I'm invincible!
How are we supposed to beat this guy?
Nothing we're doing
is even putting a dent in him!
[laughing]
[giggling]
Tickle-tickle-tickle!
Stop!
[both giggling]
That's it!
Tweety!
Huh?
The feathers!
They're the source of all his power!
We don't have to beat Diego...
We just have to get to his boa!
[laughing]
We just gotta find a way to
distract him long enough to get to it.
You two go. I got this!
[gasps]
Puddy Tat...
Hmm!
[grunts]
[both] Brothers!
Hey! Diego!
[laughing] Huh?
Your boa...
[snarls]
makes you look stupid!
How dare you!
I look beautiful!
Magic!
Neigh.
[laughing]
[grunting]
Huh? Hey! What are you doing?
[grunting]
Oh, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no! Stop!
My boa!
[grunts]
Oh, no! My magic! No, no, no!
General Chirp!
King Peep!
Hey, guys.
[gasps] Larry Bird!
[Tweety] First Lady Lady Bird Johnson!
Where families bloom, so does hope!
[Aoogah] Charlie "Bird" Parker?
I play the saxophone!
Of course, you do!
All the kids know
who you are, Charlie "Bird" Parker!
How does this family have
so many human beings in it?
[laughing]
Mom?
Hey, sweetie! You're all doing great!
Uh, is that a cat?
Hi.
Wow!
Looks like we've got
a real family reunion on our hands!
Here, let's give you kids a boost!
Wait. Larry, where did you get
a feather from?
Don't ask.
Join in, Sylvester! You're family too!
Ooh.
Hey, puppy
You've made a fatal miscalculation!
Your magic may be neat and all,
but it's nothing compared
to the bond between a family!
Whether it's by blood...
Or by love...
When we come together, we're...
[all] 3,000 times more powerful!
[gasps]
Whoa. Weird.
The power of family has transformed us!
I get to share an ascended
form with Puddy Tat.
This is a dream come true!
Mwah.
Please don't kiss me
in front of all your ancestors.
Uh, guys, is this my arm,
or your arm, or what?
Limb check!
Arms! Legs! Heads! Butts!
Cha!
Funky fresh new body or not,
the three of you aren't stopping me!
No, but our family will!
[snarls] Magic!
Hee-hee.
-Huh?
-[all] Guess who!
[grunts]
Ha!
[screaming]
[exclaims, grunts]
Ha-ha!
Honk, honk! Coming through!
[screams, grunts]
[groans]
[grunting]
Hey, Diego! Think fast!
Huh?
[eagle screeches]
[all yelling]
[screams]
[saxophone music playing]
[grunts]
[exclaiming]
[grunts]
[yelling]
Boo!
-Ahh!
-Hee-yaah!
Oh, no!
[screaming]
Mommy! Ahh!
[all exclaiming]
[grunts]
[groaning]
[beeps]
Hey! Stop, you weird little disc!
Ugh, sufferin' succotash.
Did we win?
Hmm?
Bye-bye, Bird family!
See y'all later!
Well, it's time for us to head off now.
Goodbye...
Mom, wait!
Will I ever see you again?
Oh, I mean, I'm free most Thursdays.
Does that work?
Oh, yeah, sure. I'm available.
Goodbye...
Bye, ancestors. See you later!
Bye!
Well, this has certainly been a day.
[Beep Beep] Whoo!
Your Highness! You're all right!
Oh, we were so worried!
Aw, yeah! Let's party!
[upbeat music playing]
[scatting along with music]
-[Granny] Boys!
-[both] Huh?
You did it!
Ha-ha!
Couldn't have done it
without you, Granny!
Whoo! That was nuts!
[grunts]
I think we need a new job!
Aw, yeah! Let's do it!
[both laughing]
Well, being king is sweet and all,
but it's too much stress for me!
Kidnapping? Battles?
Scary magic men?
No, thanks! I've had enough!
Yeah.
Living in royal luxury is nice and all,
but what I really want
is a nice quiet life
in New York with my family!
Agreed!
I have had my fill
of extreme vacation action!
I'm ready to go home
and relax with my boys!
Yeah!
What are you going to do, Aoogah?
Well, I'm excited to get back
to taking care
of all of these fine people...
[all] Go! Go! Go! Go! Yeah!
Flexibility!
Ugh, but to be honest,
all this drama has really wiped me out.
I need a vacation!
I think we could do
something about that!
[all laughing]
[funky instrumental music playing]