London Sweeties (2019) Movie Script
LONDON SWEETIES
I beg you. Come with me. It's just London.
It's only for a couple of days.
I will lend you my suitcase. I have two.
Business class ticket. Five-star hotel.
What five-star? I'm serious.
You know how I am when I freak out.
I'll go crazy, and I'll lose it.
You have to come with me.
You should ask Pop then.
Just leave him there, in my heart.
- Kaew, right?
- Yes.
- You're late today.
- Only a little bit.
- What did you do last night?
- I went to bed late.
Oops!
Got stuck paper.
- Got stuck paper.
- "Paper got stuck."
- Right. Stuck got paper.
- That's it. "Paper got stuck."
You got it worse.
You always mess with me.
- Pop, hello.
- Pop, hello. Hello.
Why messing me with you are?
"Why are you messing with me?"
You struggle with Thai. How will you
manage just English in London?
Business class ticket, remember!
Business class, business class.
I'm paying in installments
for economy class.
I miss eating rice.
You miss Thai rice or midnight meals?
I miss Thai rice. It's so expensive here.
Just go to bed so you won't get fat.
No. Otherwise, you'll seduce me
while I'm asleep.
Bo, can you buy me new bras?
- Can't you buy them in London?
- I want the same model.
- And my boobs got bigger.
- Is that possible?
You don't believe it? Come and touch them.
Yeah, I'll go touch them in London.
Get yourself out of there first
if you want to come to London.
Which model do you want?
Like this. But get me the red one.
Are these big? I can see
down to the belly button.
- Can you help?
- Don't worry.
- Who's that?
- Jungwon.
Ju-On who?
Jungwon, not Ju-On.
He helped me when I first arrived here.
Hey, Four, every time we talk, why do you
only talk about Ju-On and not Emma?
So what is it? What's going on?
Well, it's something secret.
Wanna talk to him? I'll get him.
No, I can't.
I think Pen's tricking me
into going there.
Just go.
I'm not ready.
I haven't finished my internship.
Or is it that you don't want to leave Pop?
Find someone in London. Lots of men there.
I struggle with Thai language.
How will I manage English?
Go, or your brother-in-law
will think you don't like him.
My brother-in-law is one thing.
Me being crazy is another.
Me not being able to speak English,
that's another.
He would understand. He's not stupid.
He'll try to talk to you anyway.
It's stressful
that he'll try to talk to me.
- Why?
- Of course, I'm stressed out.
Let's say he talks to me.
I stress out, then freak.
If I freak, then I lose it.
How could I explain that to him?
- Eating chili relieves stress.
- Yeah, eating chili relieves stress.
Eat. Eat.
- Why?
- If you start the first sentence,
he'll think you speak English
and always talk to you.
- So I can't speak to him at all?
- Then don't go.
No, I have to. It's Pen's wedding.
You don't love her anymore?
Four, did you tell your friends
that I'm a mechanic?
I did.
- Not just an ordinary mechanic.
- What kind?
Super cute mechanic.
My girlfriend. She lives in London.
Bo, should we race?
I'm going to school,
but you are going home.
Let's see who will arrive first.
Shuttle boat against subway in London?
Of course, the shuttle boat is faster.
Fine. Fine.
If you win,
I'll let you kiss my butt cheeks.
If you lose,
I'll let you kiss my cheeks. Okay?
I gotta go. I'm in a hurry.
I miss your butt.
It's freezing.
Hey, I'm home.
You've just arrived?
I've been waiting here a long time.
- You lost.
- I went easy on you.
What does the loser have to do?
You have to come and kiss me.
Kissing you now.
Jude, why are you going to London?
I want to shag a westerner.
Then, show me,
how will you speak English to them?
There you go.
You can only say words about food?
Don't underestimate me.
If you disagree,
how about we bet 3,000 baht?
Don't challenge me. I'm quite confident
about this. How about 5,000 baht?
- I say 10,000 baht.
- 15,000 baht.
- I say 20,000.
- 30,000.
Then 40,000 with a live video.
You said it, Ouan. Deal.
I'm trying to finish writing this essay.
And I have another part-time job.
What are you talking about?
I don't understand.
I just have to finish my assignment.
If it's too tiring,
why not finish school first,
then get a job in Thailand.
No need to do both at the same time.
No. They pay you well here.
Actually, I even want to get a job here,
but I miss someone in Thailand.
One sec.
What's wrong, Four? Why are you crying?
I'm not. I've just got dust in my eyes.
Tell me.
I'm not crying. I really have dust
in my eyes. I'm fine.
How about I sell my old house
and go to London?
It's just dust in my eyes,
and you're going to sell your house?
Even a drop of your tears is a big deal.
I'm going to London.
You don't have to come. I'm fine.
Why can't a suburb guy
like me go to London?
How will you manage here?
You can only say, "Yes, no, okay."
HOUSE FOR SALE
Contact 081-469-1443
It's been so long. I miss you.
Give me a hug.
- Is this all your stuff?
- Yes.
- Let's go.
- Wait. Take me to buy a SIM card first.
Why? We just got together and you want
a SIM card? Don't you miss me at all?
I read about it. It's cheap here.
All right, we'll buy it later. Go.
It's cold.
Michael is a really nice guy.
You'll like him when you two meet.
Got something to insert here
so I can pull the SIM tray out?
Can you do it at home? Listen to me first.
I'm afraid of getting lost.
Here is the story.
It was 7:00 a.m. on my day off.
I went to the beach.
I was appreciating the scenery.
And then a strong wind
blew out of nowhere.
It blew my scarf away. It was gone.
Wait. What does this story
have to do with Michael?
- Don't rush me. I'm telling you now.
- All right. Day two.
So, on day two, I went to work
at the clinic, and I met Michael.
Day three.
I bumped into him in front of my flat.
I just realized
he'd been living there for years,
but we never met.
When I told him that the scarf was mine,
he was surprised,
and he shouted "Destiny!"
- What's "Disney"?
- No, not Walt Disney.
"Destiny'" as in
- godsent.
- Godsent.
"Destiny," right?
- "Destiny," okay?
- I see, "Destiny."
And, on day eight
It was the last day of his treatment.
As I was treating him,
he wrote on his back,
- "You are the apple of my eye."
- Apple?
- What does it have to do with an apple?
- It's an idiom.
It means, "You are my heart,"
or something like that.
What is "idiom"?
Are you happy to have
a foreigner as your brother-in-law?
Yeah, I guess.
I don't even know what "idiom" is.
Here, Michael calls me "June."
Don't be confused.
Call yourself "Polly," I beg you.
- Why?
- Because "Pron" here sounds like "porno."
It means, "You are my heart,"
or something like that.
What is "idiom"?
I can't speak Thai.
No, I can't speak English.
Pen.
If you start the first sentence,
he'll think you speak English
and always talk to you.
Hey
Are you Thai?
Is there anything I can do to help?
Can you speak English?
The policeman want to see your passport.
- Passport.
- Passport.
Do you have it?
- Thank you very much.
- You're welcome. We're both Thai.
Next time, you should be more prepared
about the passport,
travelling, listening,
and speaking English
because that makes
Thai women here look stupid.
Damn.
Pron.
- You waited long?
- Pen.
After your wedding, I'll go back home.
I won't be able to get married soon.
Michael had a bicycle accident.
His arm is still in a cast.
He won't have healed within seven days.
What did you say?
What are you guys laughing about?
You just said you wanted
to give him a blow job.
But it's okay.
They don't use that word here.
What does "moke" mean?
Oh, no.
What did Ju-On say?
His name is Jungwon!
Yeah, what did he say?
He offered to swap rooms
because he has a bigger bed.
Tell him it's all right.
I can sleep on the couch.
You said that yourself.
Here, I barely made it through here.
Bo, how much is it for my bra?
It's nothing. I bought it for you.
Come on, you bought them for me
so many times.
Don't worry.
Last time you lost, right?
- Take off your pants. I'll kiss you.
- Creepy!
If you lose, you kiss the cheeks,
not the butt cheeks.
- What?
- You have nice hands.
Why?
- What did she say?
- She just said hello to you.
- Let's get to the point.
- What?
I want to experience the real London.
- Aren't we in London?
- No
- What?
- I want to sleep with women. Is it hard?
You want to sleep with women here?
It's not that hard.
But women here don't smile much.
If they smile at you,
then you might have a shot at it.
You should take an English class
until the wedding.
It might help you stop freaking out.
I've been learning English
since I was a kid. It doesn't help.
How much longer do I have to study?
If you can exclaim in English,
then it's a start.
If you dream in English,
you've got the hang of the language.
If you have a westerner as a boyfriend,
you'll get the right accent.
- Like you?
- Yeah.
What did he say? Do you understand?
Thai language is not allowed, I guess.
Are you Thai?
- Yes, I am.
- We'll speak Thai then. I'm Bo.
I'm Pron. I think I'm younger.
Hi, Pron. I'm Jude.
That's my friend.
Aung Tuan. He's half French.
Hi.
He's a westerner but can't speak English.
He has a crush on you.
You're weird.
You even mess up exclamations.
Oh, God!
What's wrong, Pron?
Guys can't chat me up. I go crazy.
- I freak out and lose it.
- You'll be dead meat.
When French people greet each other,
they French kiss with the tongue.
Go with the tongue all the way.
Why do you avoid me all the time?
You don't want to talk to me?
I like you.
I don't understand. Why do you follow me?
I don't understand you.
Here, here.
Bonjour.
Yes, one moment, please.
- Aung Tuan is getting serious.
- Why?
He asked me to teach him Thai
so he can talk to Pron.
How do you know he wants you to teach him?
We're alike.
- I know that.
- What did you teach him?
Hey, Aung Tuan. Tuan.
Wanna go eat some pussy?
Yeah!
Bo.
Jungwon wants to talk to you.
You speak English so well now!
Did you understand him?
I can't take you there.
- To where?
- To give handouts.
To give handouts?
Yeah, okay, that's fine.
What will you do then?
I have an exam. I won't be home.
- Go ahead. Don't worry. I'll manage.
- You sure?
It's handouts, Four. Can't be so hard.
You gave him your word.
If you don't want to go, tell him.
No need. I can do it.
Giving handouts. Easy, piece of cake.
- Will you be okay?
- Just go to your exam. Don't worry.
But I really won't be home.
Just go to your exam. Don't worry.
What boy? I'm a man.
Eat.
Go. Go eat. Eat
Eat
Eat Eat
Eat
Damn it. What the hell?
Damn! I still have no chance.
He doesn't see me.
He doesn't see me. I don't see him.
I see nobody. Nobody sees me.
No
Last night, I even had a dream
about me trying to avoid Michael.
Why did you avoid him? Just talk to him.
Well, was your dream
in English or in Thai?
In my dream,
Michael was gonna choke me,
so I shouted
What?
So it's either the number eight or an egg.
"Eight," the number, or "egg"?
- Aren't they the same thing?
- They are not!
Straight or box?
Pen, what kind of lottery is that?
What is "straight"? What is "box"?
Straight is the jackpot.
Box is matching numbers.
We bought two pounds, right?
If we win, we'll get 10,000 pounds.
When will you talk to him?
I do want to talk to him,
so I can thank him for loving you
and taking care of you.
Then we can talk about other things.
Maybe about when you used to be a tomboy.
If you talk about that, you'll get hit.
He didn't even teach us. He cooked without
heating the pan. The class is expensive.
Do I look stupid?
I think he wants to teach us
how English language works.
After we finish shopping at the market,
let's go cook at my place, okay?
- Invite Aung Tuan too.
- No, no, no.
Westerner!
What is "ear shark"?
What are you looking at?
I saw an Arab guy leaving his bag there.
Then he was gone.
Is he a terrorist?
Come on, don't be ridiculous.
I'm not joking. I'm serious.
Where did he go?
She parked a baby stroller there.
- What do we do? You go tell her.
- What should we do?
- What should we do?
- Go tell her!
You should call the police.
Hurry. Call them.
- Call. Call.
- What the number?
- Number! Number!
- Number, number
- What's the number? What is it?
- Number?
- I don't know.
- Tell her.
Wait.
- What will you tell her?
- I don't know.
- What will you say?
- I can't.
"Baby." How do we say "baby"
in English?
- Baby.
- Baby.
Go tell the baby.
Get back here!
Why are you taking all this with you?
Leave it with me.
- Bomb!
- Bomb!
Pron, get back here!
We're in trouble!
Why did you run?
- Why did you me with mess?
- It's "mess with me."
Hello, how are you?
- Is Pron here?
- Aung Tuan.
Hi.
- He's Pron's boyfriend.
- Pron's boyfriend?
Thank you very much.
Pron.
Your boyfriend is here.
Hi.
No, he's not. No.
Why are you hiding? He's here to see you.
Everyone, this is Michael, my groom-to-be.
Talk to him.
- What are you doing?
- Washing veggies.
I'll make salad.
Are you embarrassed?
Bo.
Chicken rice? Yeah. Okay. No skin?
Okay, I'll go make it now. Wait a bit.
- What are you doing here?
- Getting fresh air.
Come here.
Close the door, or he'll come after us.
Why did you invite him? You too.
Wanna go eat some pussy?
God, no!
What is this?
How come you don't understand
your own language?
What went wrong?
Straight, left, right.
Is he really a westerner?
Hi, there!
Girls!
Do you want to make out?
POSSIBLE
POSSIBLY
POSSIBILITY
PROBABLE
Enough! No more talking!
PROBLEM, THEN
I'm okay.
It's just that Michael and I
It's over. That's it.
I came back home, and I didn't see him,
so I called.
And we argued.
I speak English well enough
to marry a westerner.
We still can't work it out.
It's not about the meaning.
It's about the feeling.
I think "possible" means possible.
POSSIBLE - It can happen
But Michael thinks "possibly"
means possibly.
POSSIBLY - It might happen
Hey, Four.
- You said you had an exam.
- I'm about to leave.
I'm in a hurry.
- Gotta go. Bye.
- Why is your hair so wet?
What's with her?
Hey, Jude. What did you do?
What did I do?
Why did you make fun of her?
She is mute.
Want to eat?
Want some?
It's already bad enough for her.
If you were not Thai,
I would fire you now.
Should I apologize to her?
No. What are you going to say?
She can't hear.
I don't understand.
One second. I'm about to explain.
Michael thinks it's impossible
that anyone can be so scared
of speak English,
but he thinks it's possible
that someone doesn't like him.
So we argued.
I don't know if I heard
it wrong or if he was being silly.
We talked, and we became frustrated.
I don't know if he said it wrong or right.
And I had to translate.
I just translated what he said.
I don't know.
I need to go to present
a marketing project.
I have an exam. I won't be home.
Maybe I just don't understand him.
If we marry, we won't make it last.
The wedding has to be cancelled.
Is it because of me?
Yes.
Here, I barely made it through here.
Four.
Four. Four.
I want to go home.
- Bo, what's wrong?
- Did you cry because you want to leave me?
I'm not crying. I really have dust
in my eyes. I'm fine.
How long have you been with Jungwon?
Well, it's something secret.
I'm fine. You don't have to come.
Don't sell your house. Calm down.
Bo, what's wrong with you?
We hadn't seen each other in a long time.
Why did you hesitate to hug me?
I'm shy.
What did she say?
Look!
One second. I'll be back.
Sorry.
Hey, Jude. What are you doing?
I'm here to apologize to her.
I told you, didn't I?
You can't communicate with her.
I told you in Thai.
You still don't understand?
I think you should leave. Go back home.
Get out.
What's so scary about speaking English?
He must have dumped me.
Should you two talk face to face?
No.
I know what you said. I studied English.
Where did you study English?
You misunderstood.
I understood what he said.
"Closet" doesn't mean wardrobe here.
He's gay.
He wants to let everyone know.
Four, are you speaking English to me?
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.
I didn't mean to speak English to you.
Don't be mad at me.
Hello.
I failed.
I thought she spoke English,
and I didn't understand.
Actually, she didn't speak at all.
Yeah, I'll ask my grandma
to transfer half of it.
I lost, and I accept that.
Damn. I've been mistranslating
all this time?
Bo, what's wrong?
I don't want to understand English.
It makes me look stupid.
Four, we live in different worlds.
You better leave me.
I'm stupid.
I'm stupid like a donkey!
Stupid how?
Too stupid to be with her.
I'll ask to stay with Aung Tuan
until I find a ticket home.
I'm much stupider than you.
I wanted to apologize to a mute,
and I got fired.
Idiot! We've studied English
since the first grade.
- Hey, Jude, Bo.
- Why are you here?
Can you ask Aung Tuan to give me a lift?
- Where to?
- Michael's home.
- Why do you want to go there?
- A bit of a misunderstanding.
How serious is it?
- The wedding might get cancelled.
- That bad?
Jude,
can you please ask Aung Tuan?
Me? Talk to Aung Tuan?
Aung Tuan.
Vroom!
Sorry, I don't get it.
Bo, your turn to talk to him.
He doesn't understand.
For Pen. For Pen. For Pen.
Okay.
I knew it.
You, playboy!
That's sad.
Pen.
I'm sorry.
Turn left.
Left? Okay.
Chonnicha. You are Pron's friend, right?
You already know. Why do you ask?
I already know. Why do I ask?
Well, when will she come back?
- I don't know.
- You don't know.
Well, an intern should finish
an internship
in order to graduate. You are her friend.
You should call her. Will you? Call her?
You should call her yourself.
Call her myself.
Call her. Call her myself.
I don't have her number.
If you don't, then me neither.
Friends have each other's numbers.
I don't have her number,
but I can take you to her.
- Really?
- Business class ticket.
- Pen is getting married.
- That's great.
I'm her only family.
I have to give a speech.
Do it then.
A speech in English. Piece of cake!
I don't think you should.
You're nervous enough.
You haven't added water yet.
Water's not boiled.
It's spilling.
The tap is still running.
Water, water, water.
Are you making coffee or salad?
Pour it into a cup.
I'm also gonna sing.
- Sing?
- Yeah.
Don't. You'll ruin the party.
Don't embarrass us Thai.
I'm so ready. So ready. Look.
I'll eat alphabet crackers. Here!
Don't forget to say, "Hooray!"
after you're done singing.
- Hooray.
- Hayroo.
- Hooray.
- Hayroo.
- Hooray.
- Hayroo.
- Hayroo.
- Hooray.
What are you doing?
I'm rehearsing for singing
at Pen's wedding.
Is this rehearsing?
Berremme
What's with the spoonerism?
Now go and get her. Berremme
"Remember."
- What does it mean?
- Remember.
I'm remembering. I'm memorizing it.
What does it mean?
Remember.
- Berremme
- Remember. Remember.
Remember.
Seriously, I think you shouldn't sing.
Just memorize it.
Write it down and recite it to them.
You'll embarrass yourself
with your singing.
You can't even say "remember."
It's "remember."
Hi, where are you going?
I'm rehearsing for Pen's wedding.
Can we talk in English?
This way we can practice English together.
This song, here.
Did I sing it right?
Awesome.
Really?
Awesome.
June, I love you.
I love you. I love you.
Aung Tuan.
It's pretty here,
but my country is more beautiful.
What's wrong with Bo?
I planned to stay in
London for only one month,
but, after meeting you,
I don't want to leave.
It'd be nice if Jan were here too.
We'd surely take a lot of pictures.
My next destination is Manchester,
where I'll stay for three months,
and Scotland after that for three months.
They can understand each other.
Do you want to listen to a song?
A bra?
A song.
What's the song? Do you understand it?
So touching.
But I don't understand a word.
Don't flirt with me. I'm weird.
Today, I had a date with a French girl.
When I'm startled, it causes spoonerism.
But I want to speak Thai today.
Actually, before I came here,
I had a crush on a guy at the office.
But I pulled down his pants.
So embarrassing!
- Kim hiss!
- Kiss him!
- Kag and shiss!
- Kiss and shag!
Let's go!
I don't understand.
But it's just one-sided love.
I don't know if he likes me or not.
My scarf.
Pop!
I've missed you.
Bro.
Pron is weird,
but guys still go after her.
Who do you think she'll choose?
Have you asked her who she likes?
I don't know who she's gonna pick,
but Aung Tuan is my friend.
I'm here! I'm here!
I think you should just stand there
and smile.
Good afternoon.
At first, I wasn't sure
It's a Bee Gees' song!
You two speak different languages.
But
But
You say it best
This is from Notting Hill!
You come from different countries.
We are the world.
You are the best
Just the way you are.
It's a Bruno Mars' song!
When you're angry
Please remember
How do I live without you?
This is from the movie Con Air.
Let it go.
The animated film Frozen.
- So touching.
- You feel touched?
I didn't get her point.
- Can I walk with you?
- Yes.
It's cold.
Will you go back to Thailand
right after the wedding?
Well
They miss you in Thailand.
I do too.
Come back. With me.
Let's go back together.
- Where are you going?
- I don't know.
- Wait up.
- No!
Pron.
I'm embarrassed!
What do you have to be embarrassed about?
About Pron.
She's weird,
but she made it work in the end.
I won't give up.
Jan, what are you listening to?
Can I listen to it too?
Here.
Awesome.
Awesome? Really?
More. More.
You like it?
I don't understand a single word,
but it's so touching.
Listen to this song. I like it.
I have only this song for you to listen
I need you to understand and try to love
I will make you understand that
How much I love you
I give you with all my heart
And no need to return my love
I just want you to know
Understand or don't understand.
Which to choose?
Four, I'm sorry.
I didn't try hard enough.
Where are you, Four?
I came back to see you in Thailand.
Where are you now?
I'm outside your flat in London.
Why did you go there?
Four, don't cry. I'll come to you.
Should we have another race?
Who's going to arrive first?
You challenge me again.
If you win, you can kiss my butt cheek.
If you lose, you can kiss my cheek.
Get your butt cheek ready then.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Thank you very much. See you!
- Thanks.
Sorry, I'm done.
I beg you. Come with me. It's just London.
It's only for a couple of days.
I will lend you my suitcase. I have two.
Business class ticket. Five-star hotel.
What five-star? I'm serious.
You know how I am when I freak out.
I'll go crazy, and I'll lose it.
You have to come with me.
You should ask Pop then.
Just leave him there, in my heart.
- Kaew, right?
- Yes.
- You're late today.
- Only a little bit.
- What did you do last night?
- I went to bed late.
Oops!
Got stuck paper.
- Got stuck paper.
- "Paper got stuck."
- Right. Stuck got paper.
- That's it. "Paper got stuck."
You got it worse.
You always mess with me.
- Pop, hello.
- Pop, hello. Hello.
Why messing me with you are?
"Why are you messing with me?"
You struggle with Thai. How will you
manage just English in London?
Business class ticket, remember!
Business class, business class.
I'm paying in installments
for economy class.
I miss eating rice.
You miss Thai rice or midnight meals?
I miss Thai rice. It's so expensive here.
Just go to bed so you won't get fat.
No. Otherwise, you'll seduce me
while I'm asleep.
Bo, can you buy me new bras?
- Can't you buy them in London?
- I want the same model.
- And my boobs got bigger.
- Is that possible?
You don't believe it? Come and touch them.
Yeah, I'll go touch them in London.
Get yourself out of there first
if you want to come to London.
Which model do you want?
Like this. But get me the red one.
Are these big? I can see
down to the belly button.
- Can you help?
- Don't worry.
- Who's that?
- Jungwon.
Ju-On who?
Jungwon, not Ju-On.
He helped me when I first arrived here.
Hey, Four, every time we talk, why do you
only talk about Ju-On and not Emma?
So what is it? What's going on?
Well, it's something secret.
Wanna talk to him? I'll get him.
No, I can't.
I think Pen's tricking me
into going there.
Just go.
I'm not ready.
I haven't finished my internship.
Or is it that you don't want to leave Pop?
Find someone in London. Lots of men there.
I struggle with Thai language.
How will I manage English?
Go, or your brother-in-law
will think you don't like him.
My brother-in-law is one thing.
Me being crazy is another.
Me not being able to speak English,
that's another.
He would understand. He's not stupid.
He'll try to talk to you anyway.
It's stressful
that he'll try to talk to me.
- Why?
- Of course, I'm stressed out.
Let's say he talks to me.
I stress out, then freak.
If I freak, then I lose it.
How could I explain that to him?
- Eating chili relieves stress.
- Yeah, eating chili relieves stress.
Eat. Eat.
- Why?
- If you start the first sentence,
he'll think you speak English
and always talk to you.
- So I can't speak to him at all?
- Then don't go.
No, I have to. It's Pen's wedding.
You don't love her anymore?
Four, did you tell your friends
that I'm a mechanic?
I did.
- Not just an ordinary mechanic.
- What kind?
Super cute mechanic.
My girlfriend. She lives in London.
Bo, should we race?
I'm going to school,
but you are going home.
Let's see who will arrive first.
Shuttle boat against subway in London?
Of course, the shuttle boat is faster.
Fine. Fine.
If you win,
I'll let you kiss my butt cheeks.
If you lose,
I'll let you kiss my cheeks. Okay?
I gotta go. I'm in a hurry.
I miss your butt.
It's freezing.
Hey, I'm home.
You've just arrived?
I've been waiting here a long time.
- You lost.
- I went easy on you.
What does the loser have to do?
You have to come and kiss me.
Kissing you now.
Jude, why are you going to London?
I want to shag a westerner.
Then, show me,
how will you speak English to them?
There you go.
You can only say words about food?
Don't underestimate me.
If you disagree,
how about we bet 3,000 baht?
Don't challenge me. I'm quite confident
about this. How about 5,000 baht?
- I say 10,000 baht.
- 15,000 baht.
- I say 20,000.
- 30,000.
Then 40,000 with a live video.
You said it, Ouan. Deal.
I'm trying to finish writing this essay.
And I have another part-time job.
What are you talking about?
I don't understand.
I just have to finish my assignment.
If it's too tiring,
why not finish school first,
then get a job in Thailand.
No need to do both at the same time.
No. They pay you well here.
Actually, I even want to get a job here,
but I miss someone in Thailand.
One sec.
What's wrong, Four? Why are you crying?
I'm not. I've just got dust in my eyes.
Tell me.
I'm not crying. I really have dust
in my eyes. I'm fine.
How about I sell my old house
and go to London?
It's just dust in my eyes,
and you're going to sell your house?
Even a drop of your tears is a big deal.
I'm going to London.
You don't have to come. I'm fine.
Why can't a suburb guy
like me go to London?
How will you manage here?
You can only say, "Yes, no, okay."
HOUSE FOR SALE
Contact 081-469-1443
It's been so long. I miss you.
Give me a hug.
- Is this all your stuff?
- Yes.
- Let's go.
- Wait. Take me to buy a SIM card first.
Why? We just got together and you want
a SIM card? Don't you miss me at all?
I read about it. It's cheap here.
All right, we'll buy it later. Go.
It's cold.
Michael is a really nice guy.
You'll like him when you two meet.
Got something to insert here
so I can pull the SIM tray out?
Can you do it at home? Listen to me first.
I'm afraid of getting lost.
Here is the story.
It was 7:00 a.m. on my day off.
I went to the beach.
I was appreciating the scenery.
And then a strong wind
blew out of nowhere.
It blew my scarf away. It was gone.
Wait. What does this story
have to do with Michael?
- Don't rush me. I'm telling you now.
- All right. Day two.
So, on day two, I went to work
at the clinic, and I met Michael.
Day three.
I bumped into him in front of my flat.
I just realized
he'd been living there for years,
but we never met.
When I told him that the scarf was mine,
he was surprised,
and he shouted "Destiny!"
- What's "Disney"?
- No, not Walt Disney.
"Destiny'" as in
- godsent.
- Godsent.
"Destiny," right?
- "Destiny," okay?
- I see, "Destiny."
And, on day eight
It was the last day of his treatment.
As I was treating him,
he wrote on his back,
- "You are the apple of my eye."
- Apple?
- What does it have to do with an apple?
- It's an idiom.
It means, "You are my heart,"
or something like that.
What is "idiom"?
Are you happy to have
a foreigner as your brother-in-law?
Yeah, I guess.
I don't even know what "idiom" is.
Here, Michael calls me "June."
Don't be confused.
Call yourself "Polly," I beg you.
- Why?
- Because "Pron" here sounds like "porno."
It means, "You are my heart,"
or something like that.
What is "idiom"?
I can't speak Thai.
No, I can't speak English.
Pen.
If you start the first sentence,
he'll think you speak English
and always talk to you.
Hey
Are you Thai?
Is there anything I can do to help?
Can you speak English?
The policeman want to see your passport.
- Passport.
- Passport.
Do you have it?
- Thank you very much.
- You're welcome. We're both Thai.
Next time, you should be more prepared
about the passport,
travelling, listening,
and speaking English
because that makes
Thai women here look stupid.
Damn.
Pron.
- You waited long?
- Pen.
After your wedding, I'll go back home.
I won't be able to get married soon.
Michael had a bicycle accident.
His arm is still in a cast.
He won't have healed within seven days.
What did you say?
What are you guys laughing about?
You just said you wanted
to give him a blow job.
But it's okay.
They don't use that word here.
What does "moke" mean?
Oh, no.
What did Ju-On say?
His name is Jungwon!
Yeah, what did he say?
He offered to swap rooms
because he has a bigger bed.
Tell him it's all right.
I can sleep on the couch.
You said that yourself.
Here, I barely made it through here.
Bo, how much is it for my bra?
It's nothing. I bought it for you.
Come on, you bought them for me
so many times.
Don't worry.
Last time you lost, right?
- Take off your pants. I'll kiss you.
- Creepy!
If you lose, you kiss the cheeks,
not the butt cheeks.
- What?
- You have nice hands.
Why?
- What did she say?
- She just said hello to you.
- Let's get to the point.
- What?
I want to experience the real London.
- Aren't we in London?
- No
- What?
- I want to sleep with women. Is it hard?
You want to sleep with women here?
It's not that hard.
But women here don't smile much.
If they smile at you,
then you might have a shot at it.
You should take an English class
until the wedding.
It might help you stop freaking out.
I've been learning English
since I was a kid. It doesn't help.
How much longer do I have to study?
If you can exclaim in English,
then it's a start.
If you dream in English,
you've got the hang of the language.
If you have a westerner as a boyfriend,
you'll get the right accent.
- Like you?
- Yeah.
What did he say? Do you understand?
Thai language is not allowed, I guess.
Are you Thai?
- Yes, I am.
- We'll speak Thai then. I'm Bo.
I'm Pron. I think I'm younger.
Hi, Pron. I'm Jude.
That's my friend.
Aung Tuan. He's half French.
Hi.
He's a westerner but can't speak English.
He has a crush on you.
You're weird.
You even mess up exclamations.
Oh, God!
What's wrong, Pron?
Guys can't chat me up. I go crazy.
- I freak out and lose it.
- You'll be dead meat.
When French people greet each other,
they French kiss with the tongue.
Go with the tongue all the way.
Why do you avoid me all the time?
You don't want to talk to me?
I like you.
I don't understand. Why do you follow me?
I don't understand you.
Here, here.
Bonjour.
Yes, one moment, please.
- Aung Tuan is getting serious.
- Why?
He asked me to teach him Thai
so he can talk to Pron.
How do you know he wants you to teach him?
We're alike.
- I know that.
- What did you teach him?
Hey, Aung Tuan. Tuan.
Wanna go eat some pussy?
Yeah!
Bo.
Jungwon wants to talk to you.
You speak English so well now!
Did you understand him?
I can't take you there.
- To where?
- To give handouts.
To give handouts?
Yeah, okay, that's fine.
What will you do then?
I have an exam. I won't be home.
- Go ahead. Don't worry. I'll manage.
- You sure?
It's handouts, Four. Can't be so hard.
You gave him your word.
If you don't want to go, tell him.
No need. I can do it.
Giving handouts. Easy, piece of cake.
- Will you be okay?
- Just go to your exam. Don't worry.
But I really won't be home.
Just go to your exam. Don't worry.
What boy? I'm a man.
Eat.
Go. Go eat. Eat
Eat
Eat Eat
Eat
Damn it. What the hell?
Damn! I still have no chance.
He doesn't see me.
He doesn't see me. I don't see him.
I see nobody. Nobody sees me.
No
Last night, I even had a dream
about me trying to avoid Michael.
Why did you avoid him? Just talk to him.
Well, was your dream
in English or in Thai?
In my dream,
Michael was gonna choke me,
so I shouted
What?
So it's either the number eight or an egg.
"Eight," the number, or "egg"?
- Aren't they the same thing?
- They are not!
Straight or box?
Pen, what kind of lottery is that?
What is "straight"? What is "box"?
Straight is the jackpot.
Box is matching numbers.
We bought two pounds, right?
If we win, we'll get 10,000 pounds.
When will you talk to him?
I do want to talk to him,
so I can thank him for loving you
and taking care of you.
Then we can talk about other things.
Maybe about when you used to be a tomboy.
If you talk about that, you'll get hit.
He didn't even teach us. He cooked without
heating the pan. The class is expensive.
Do I look stupid?
I think he wants to teach us
how English language works.
After we finish shopping at the market,
let's go cook at my place, okay?
- Invite Aung Tuan too.
- No, no, no.
Westerner!
What is "ear shark"?
What are you looking at?
I saw an Arab guy leaving his bag there.
Then he was gone.
Is he a terrorist?
Come on, don't be ridiculous.
I'm not joking. I'm serious.
Where did he go?
She parked a baby stroller there.
- What do we do? You go tell her.
- What should we do?
- What should we do?
- Go tell her!
You should call the police.
Hurry. Call them.
- Call. Call.
- What the number?
- Number! Number!
- Number, number
- What's the number? What is it?
- Number?
- I don't know.
- Tell her.
Wait.
- What will you tell her?
- I don't know.
- What will you say?
- I can't.
"Baby." How do we say "baby"
in English?
- Baby.
- Baby.
Go tell the baby.
Get back here!
Why are you taking all this with you?
Leave it with me.
- Bomb!
- Bomb!
Pron, get back here!
We're in trouble!
Why did you run?
- Why did you me with mess?
- It's "mess with me."
Hello, how are you?
- Is Pron here?
- Aung Tuan.
Hi.
- He's Pron's boyfriend.
- Pron's boyfriend?
Thank you very much.
Pron.
Your boyfriend is here.
Hi.
No, he's not. No.
Why are you hiding? He's here to see you.
Everyone, this is Michael, my groom-to-be.
Talk to him.
- What are you doing?
- Washing veggies.
I'll make salad.
Are you embarrassed?
Bo.
Chicken rice? Yeah. Okay. No skin?
Okay, I'll go make it now. Wait a bit.
- What are you doing here?
- Getting fresh air.
Come here.
Close the door, or he'll come after us.
Why did you invite him? You too.
Wanna go eat some pussy?
God, no!
What is this?
How come you don't understand
your own language?
What went wrong?
Straight, left, right.
Is he really a westerner?
Hi, there!
Girls!
Do you want to make out?
POSSIBLE
POSSIBLY
POSSIBILITY
PROBABLE
Enough! No more talking!
PROBLEM, THEN
I'm okay.
It's just that Michael and I
It's over. That's it.
I came back home, and I didn't see him,
so I called.
And we argued.
I speak English well enough
to marry a westerner.
We still can't work it out.
It's not about the meaning.
It's about the feeling.
I think "possible" means possible.
POSSIBLE - It can happen
But Michael thinks "possibly"
means possibly.
POSSIBLY - It might happen
Hey, Four.
- You said you had an exam.
- I'm about to leave.
I'm in a hurry.
- Gotta go. Bye.
- Why is your hair so wet?
What's with her?
Hey, Jude. What did you do?
What did I do?
Why did you make fun of her?
She is mute.
Want to eat?
Want some?
It's already bad enough for her.
If you were not Thai,
I would fire you now.
Should I apologize to her?
No. What are you going to say?
She can't hear.
I don't understand.
One second. I'm about to explain.
Michael thinks it's impossible
that anyone can be so scared
of speak English,
but he thinks it's possible
that someone doesn't like him.
So we argued.
I don't know if I heard
it wrong or if he was being silly.
We talked, and we became frustrated.
I don't know if he said it wrong or right.
And I had to translate.
I just translated what he said.
I don't know.
I need to go to present
a marketing project.
I have an exam. I won't be home.
Maybe I just don't understand him.
If we marry, we won't make it last.
The wedding has to be cancelled.
Is it because of me?
Yes.
Here, I barely made it through here.
Four.
Four. Four.
I want to go home.
- Bo, what's wrong?
- Did you cry because you want to leave me?
I'm not crying. I really have dust
in my eyes. I'm fine.
How long have you been with Jungwon?
Well, it's something secret.
I'm fine. You don't have to come.
Don't sell your house. Calm down.
Bo, what's wrong with you?
We hadn't seen each other in a long time.
Why did you hesitate to hug me?
I'm shy.
What did she say?
Look!
One second. I'll be back.
Sorry.
Hey, Jude. What are you doing?
I'm here to apologize to her.
I told you, didn't I?
You can't communicate with her.
I told you in Thai.
You still don't understand?
I think you should leave. Go back home.
Get out.
What's so scary about speaking English?
He must have dumped me.
Should you two talk face to face?
No.
I know what you said. I studied English.
Where did you study English?
You misunderstood.
I understood what he said.
"Closet" doesn't mean wardrobe here.
He's gay.
He wants to let everyone know.
Four, are you speaking English to me?
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.
I didn't mean to speak English to you.
Don't be mad at me.
Hello.
I failed.
I thought she spoke English,
and I didn't understand.
Actually, she didn't speak at all.
Yeah, I'll ask my grandma
to transfer half of it.
I lost, and I accept that.
Damn. I've been mistranslating
all this time?
Bo, what's wrong?
I don't want to understand English.
It makes me look stupid.
Four, we live in different worlds.
You better leave me.
I'm stupid.
I'm stupid like a donkey!
Stupid how?
Too stupid to be with her.
I'll ask to stay with Aung Tuan
until I find a ticket home.
I'm much stupider than you.
I wanted to apologize to a mute,
and I got fired.
Idiot! We've studied English
since the first grade.
- Hey, Jude, Bo.
- Why are you here?
Can you ask Aung Tuan to give me a lift?
- Where to?
- Michael's home.
- Why do you want to go there?
- A bit of a misunderstanding.
How serious is it?
- The wedding might get cancelled.
- That bad?
Jude,
can you please ask Aung Tuan?
Me? Talk to Aung Tuan?
Aung Tuan.
Vroom!
Sorry, I don't get it.
Bo, your turn to talk to him.
He doesn't understand.
For Pen. For Pen. For Pen.
Okay.
I knew it.
You, playboy!
That's sad.
Pen.
I'm sorry.
Turn left.
Left? Okay.
Chonnicha. You are Pron's friend, right?
You already know. Why do you ask?
I already know. Why do I ask?
Well, when will she come back?
- I don't know.
- You don't know.
Well, an intern should finish
an internship
in order to graduate. You are her friend.
You should call her. Will you? Call her?
You should call her yourself.
Call her myself.
Call her. Call her myself.
I don't have her number.
If you don't, then me neither.
Friends have each other's numbers.
I don't have her number,
but I can take you to her.
- Really?
- Business class ticket.
- Pen is getting married.
- That's great.
I'm her only family.
I have to give a speech.
Do it then.
A speech in English. Piece of cake!
I don't think you should.
You're nervous enough.
You haven't added water yet.
Water's not boiled.
It's spilling.
The tap is still running.
Water, water, water.
Are you making coffee or salad?
Pour it into a cup.
I'm also gonna sing.
- Sing?
- Yeah.
Don't. You'll ruin the party.
Don't embarrass us Thai.
I'm so ready. So ready. Look.
I'll eat alphabet crackers. Here!
Don't forget to say, "Hooray!"
after you're done singing.
- Hooray.
- Hayroo.
- Hooray.
- Hayroo.
- Hooray.
- Hayroo.
- Hayroo.
- Hooray.
What are you doing?
I'm rehearsing for singing
at Pen's wedding.
Is this rehearsing?
Berremme
What's with the spoonerism?
Now go and get her. Berremme
"Remember."
- What does it mean?
- Remember.
I'm remembering. I'm memorizing it.
What does it mean?
Remember.
- Berremme
- Remember. Remember.
Remember.
Seriously, I think you shouldn't sing.
Just memorize it.
Write it down and recite it to them.
You'll embarrass yourself
with your singing.
You can't even say "remember."
It's "remember."
Hi, where are you going?
I'm rehearsing for Pen's wedding.
Can we talk in English?
This way we can practice English together.
This song, here.
Did I sing it right?
Awesome.
Really?
Awesome.
June, I love you.
I love you. I love you.
Aung Tuan.
It's pretty here,
but my country is more beautiful.
What's wrong with Bo?
I planned to stay in
London for only one month,
but, after meeting you,
I don't want to leave.
It'd be nice if Jan were here too.
We'd surely take a lot of pictures.
My next destination is Manchester,
where I'll stay for three months,
and Scotland after that for three months.
They can understand each other.
Do you want to listen to a song?
A bra?
A song.
What's the song? Do you understand it?
So touching.
But I don't understand a word.
Don't flirt with me. I'm weird.
Today, I had a date with a French girl.
When I'm startled, it causes spoonerism.
But I want to speak Thai today.
Actually, before I came here,
I had a crush on a guy at the office.
But I pulled down his pants.
So embarrassing!
- Kim hiss!
- Kiss him!
- Kag and shiss!
- Kiss and shag!
Let's go!
I don't understand.
But it's just one-sided love.
I don't know if he likes me or not.
My scarf.
Pop!
I've missed you.
Bro.
Pron is weird,
but guys still go after her.
Who do you think she'll choose?
Have you asked her who she likes?
I don't know who she's gonna pick,
but Aung Tuan is my friend.
I'm here! I'm here!
I think you should just stand there
and smile.
Good afternoon.
At first, I wasn't sure
It's a Bee Gees' song!
You two speak different languages.
But
But
You say it best
This is from Notting Hill!
You come from different countries.
We are the world.
You are the best
Just the way you are.
It's a Bruno Mars' song!
When you're angry
Please remember
How do I live without you?
This is from the movie Con Air.
Let it go.
The animated film Frozen.
- So touching.
- You feel touched?
I didn't get her point.
- Can I walk with you?
- Yes.
It's cold.
Will you go back to Thailand
right after the wedding?
Well
They miss you in Thailand.
I do too.
Come back. With me.
Let's go back together.
- Where are you going?
- I don't know.
- Wait up.
- No!
Pron.
I'm embarrassed!
What do you have to be embarrassed about?
About Pron.
She's weird,
but she made it work in the end.
I won't give up.
Jan, what are you listening to?
Can I listen to it too?
Here.
Awesome.
Awesome? Really?
More. More.
You like it?
I don't understand a single word,
but it's so touching.
Listen to this song. I like it.
I have only this song for you to listen
I need you to understand and try to love
I will make you understand that
How much I love you
I give you with all my heart
And no need to return my love
I just want you to know
Understand or don't understand.
Which to choose?
Four, I'm sorry.
I didn't try hard enough.
Where are you, Four?
I came back to see you in Thailand.
Where are you now?
I'm outside your flat in London.
Why did you go there?
Four, don't cry. I'll come to you.
Should we have another race?
Who's going to arrive first?
You challenge me again.
If you win, you can kiss my butt cheek.
If you lose, you can kiss my cheek.
Get your butt cheek ready then.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Thank you very much. See you!
- Thanks.
Sorry, I'm done.