Lost Cos (2022) Movie Script
1
THERE ARE SOME WHO LIVE
IN A DREAM WORLD
AND THERE ARE OTHERS
WHO FACE REALITY.
AND THEN THERE ARE THOSE
WHO TURN ONE
INTO THE OTHER.
Douglas H. Everett
Trick or treat, trick or treat,
trick or treat, trick or treat
Dressing up is for clowns.
You a clown? Huh?
Are you a clown, huh?
Mami , no!
Don't fight me.
Mami , no!
LOST COS
That's our missing Newark guy.
What's with the gills?
Beats me, you'd think
he could swim better.
Is that mine?
Got a bacon, egg and cheese with
tomato, just like you asked.
From Metro?
Yeah. The Greek guy wants to
know who the hell puts tomato on
a BEC.
It's good for my prostate. You
should eat tomato any chance you
get.
Shit.
Hey! What are you
kids looking at?!
A dead body, duh.
Did that guy get bit
by a shark or something?
- Maybe you should give him
mouth to mouth. - Alright, beat
it.
Hey, you kids get out of here.
This better be our guy,
getting me up at six a.m.
Nice, where's mine?
I got bacon and egg
or grilled cheese.
- That's fuckin' unbelievable.
- What?
It's from the Greek guy.
Not your fucking sandwich,
you fuckin' retard.
Merman! Are you seein' this?
This guy is good.
- No, I mean, you know, he was
good. - What's with the get-up
anyway?
It's called cosplay.
People dressing up like
comic book characters.
What, you never heard of it?
Some people take
this very seriously.
Yeah, the only thing missing
is the genuine fish smell.
Hey, you know what, let's have a
little respect, fellas. This is
Merman.
He's a super badass super fish.
He can swim faster than
anything man-made or otherwise.
Fuckin' Merman is
a fuckin' badass!
Yeah, well, somebody
fucked him up.
Obviously this is not the real
fuckin' Merman. What do we know?
His last credit card transaction
was from a club called Lost Cos.
His mother said he hung out
in these incel chat groups.
- Incest?
- Incel.
Involuntary celibates.
Guys who can't get laid.
They're tickin' time bombs.
The unfuckables.
Yeah, no kiddin',
who's gonna fuck that?
Yeah, alright, I'll see
you back at the station.
Cover him up. I don't want
the seagulls gettin' at him.
So I said to the check-out girl,
"If it say's 88 cents a pound,
then it should ring up 88 cents
a pound".
Am I right?
So while I'm arguing about that,
I look over and I see the
checkout,
but the bagging boy putting
everything into paper bags,
which I hate
- because the bottoms always rip
out. - Head back.
Have you ever been shopping
in a rainstorm
Now just relax, Lorraine.
Be a good girl and count to ten.
- One.
- One.
- Two.
- Two.
- Three, four, five
- Three, four, five
Lorraine?
Lorraine?
Lorraine?
You think Lorraine
is sweet on me?
Give me your money and I'll
give you my body, Lorraine.
Steve!
Give me some pack
and a number 4.
Sure you don't mean a five?
- What are you doing in a job
like this? - I like it here.
Lucky me.
You know I love you and as long
as you keep laughing at my bad
jokes,
you always have a job here.
Sweet.
Suction. Oh, by the way, I have
another package coming to your
place tonight.
You gonna be there?
What's the deal with these
packages, huh? Am I smuggling
drugs?
No, just dirty money.
What's that say? Tell me.
Coco Loco to win Aqueduct 6th.
Shit, turn on the
TV. Channel 582.
third, now he's going
on second. Tatter Trots
Come on, Coco Loco. Suction.
Is there anything
you don't bet on?
Pairs figure skating
That shit's fixed.
Run! Get up on the outside!
Tatter Trots ahead. And Monki
Shines makes a last minute ditch
for the
Ah, fuck!
Tatter Trots.
Shit.
finish, Monki Shines.
- Are you okay?
- All good.
More suction.
We interrupt this broadcast
for a message from your local
law enforcement agents.
The New Jersey Police
is asking for any information
regarding the circumstances
surrounding what is now known as
the Merman case.
The body found on the beach
- Eni. - is identified as
Jerrold Crimson.
The victim is known
to frequently dress up as Merman
and the police are asking
for any information
prior to his disappearance
on March 27th.
Eni?
Dr. Kristin, I really
need to see you.
It's happening again.
Trauma like this,
it needs to be dealt with.
Otherwise it will continue
to manifest itself.
The pain and rage that you're
feeling will not go away by
themselves.
Pills can help to ease
the intensity of the episodes.
But the memories of the events
can never be erased.
Together, we will work
through these memories,
and eventually you will find
some form of acceptance.
I don't want to go back.
I want to forget.
Here.
I want you to start with those.
Eni, you're going to feel
the effects of this medicine.
Expect that.
Your symptoms might actually get
worse before they get better.
This is no aspirin.
BTHEMAN You bite?
VAMPIRENIYA Who's asking?
BTHEMAN You suck?
BTHEMAN
You don't know who I am
BTHEMAN Yet.
BTHEMAN
I want to have you like
BTHEMAN
MERMAN!
BTHEMAN
Careful
BTHEMAN I'm coming for you
Hey
Yeah, just working out a bit.
Pick me up at ten.
Same spot, okay?
Home base, dip!
Watch my back!
Ben, I have your dinner.
Ben, are you ever going to come
out from behind that computer?
No, no, no!
Fine, I'll just leave it here.
Aron, where you goin', man?
You're runnin'
around in circles.
I am never gonna rank
up because of you.
Why do I even put
up with this shit?
You're a fucking noob, Aron.
No, no, no. Scramble!
Scram Fuck, man!
YOU ARE DEAD FOR: 9
You just fragged me, Aron!
You're supposed to be watching
my back, man. What the hell
Well, what's your kill count in
the last three rounds? Exactly.
You suck.
Whatever.
Did you see that
flyer I sent you?
Oh, the Vampire chick thing?
That's the chick Merman
was after! That's her!
I got my eye on
that Vampire slut.
Bitches They're all
bloodsuckers. I'm going in, man.
Tonight.
I am infiltrating, I got my
disguise. They won't know what
hit 'em.
In the name of our
soldier Merman,
this excuse of a whore
deserves the inevitable revenge.
The proper punishment needs
to be inflicted
and therefore, once
again I ask you.
You're not suggesting that I
Yes, you must once more
turn into our virgin vengeance.
I summon the ancient
Hand of Odin.
The self-gratifying.
Millions of cosmic energies of
wanton, change my self-entitled
form.
Let the power of your wrath, sin
and self-hatred run through your
veins!
I will rise from
this limp mortal shell into
Aron the Alpha Male!
Fuck!
You almost killed me there.
Okay, you're taking this vampire
shit too far.
I'm just trying to stay clear
from the creep at the corner
store, that's all.
I mean, look at him.
Day and night, he is
there waiting for me.
Doesn't get it. He thinks I must
come out of that door sooner or
later.
Stupid fuck.
Well, well, well. Look at you.
Oh, you look like a real kitty.
I love it.
I bought you something.
I'm sure you do not have this.
VAMPIRENIYA
It's the very first
one ever published.
How did you get this? Oh my god.
That is a classic.
I mean, it's a piece of art.
Look, she still has the sickle.
I love it so much.
Oh my god, thank you.
Btheman I'm watching you.
What's that?
Some asshole.
Shall we go?
Well, well, well.
Welcome home, ladies.
Look at you.
Now, move your asses.
You have less than 10 minutes.
Excuse you, ma'am.
Laura, you look beautiful.
Dee Dee Hi, sweetness.
Excuse me. Where's Ramses?
Ramsey, the bar needs change.
Bill!
So let me get this straight;
You hook up with drunk girls
by recharging their phones?
- Pretty much, yes. - And how's
that working out for you?
Hey Ricky, can I get
a charge. Please?
- See?
- Unbelievable.
Now I have a perfect body.
Because I have a supersonic
solar cell cyber-circuit smart
suit body.
Oh yeah.
Ladies, let's go.
Amazing!
You better tell me
what I want to hear.
- Oh no, I can't.
- Yes!
How was it?
- Okay, he was so romantic.
- Yes.
And he was nervous. And he wore
this little tie, little bow tie.
- Good for him.
- And he was all dressed up.
Guys, let's go.
Gemini is starting.
The most beautiful experience
we can have is the mysterious.
Every human being is part
of a whole we call Universe.
Welcome to our own
Universe: Lost Cos.
There's one question
you have to answer.
Are you a hero or a villain?
- Hero!
- Villain!
Look at what we've got here.
And just in time.
I've got some nasty roaches
dancing around the bowl.
Go get 'em, Spidy.
Word. It's only ten o'clock.
Oh no, dude. Can you just hold
it? Make sure no one passes
through.
I gotta pump up a little bit.
Go Spidy, go Spidy. Go!
Oh, that is so much better.
- Hey, you got some mints over
there? - For you, of course.
Five dollars.
Five dollars? That's like
the biggest rip-off ever.
Never mind. Thanks, though.
Hey, you guys have anything
to eat that won't make me stink?
So my brother here recommends
the chicken tikka masala.
It's gonna make you smell
like a bouquet of lilies.
Alright, whatever.
Hold.
- We're full.
- What?
Come on in.
I like your moves.
I'm good with animals.
Alright.
Thank you. Thank you, even
up there. I appreciate it.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Murray
Hill, a semi-famous comedian
from Brooklyn.
Let me hear it.
This isn't my double chin, it's
just my stomach coming up for
air.
And if you don't believe in
climate change well, first of
all you're an asshole
because it does exist,
it's happening right here.
It's 350 degrees.
You can cook an artisanal cheese
pizza from Bushwick in here,
that's how hot.
Alright kids, you ready
for a performance or what?
Alright, please enjoy
"The Birth of Vampireniya".
Did you lose you're fucking mind
out there? Look at this shit!
- You almost ripped me open.
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, man.
You're crazy. I'm not doing
this shit anymore, I'm fucking
Gene Simmons, the
front man, played bass.
The bassist was the front man?
Weird.
Well, they were grown men
wearing six-inch platform heels.
So weird is subjective, I guess.
So, did you have a
good time tonight?
I loved it.
I mean, the atmosphere, the
costumes So fun and free.
It's pure art.
It's a whole world
I never knew about.
Yeah, I was
introduced to it too.
I never knew it existed,
but now it's home to me.
I hope I didn't embarrass you.
What are you talking about?
No costume.
Come on.
- Where?
- Come on.
Oh my god, look at this place.
I know, I've got
quite a collection.
This is amazing.
Oh my god.
Wait, what is this?
This is Mizu, the android geisha
from the Fallen Warrior
Six Series.
- Okay.
- Here, look. It lights up.
Wow, that's beautiful.
Wait, what is that?
Hot glue, a costumer's
secret weapon.
So, who do you want to be?
I don't know.
OMG, this is perfect for you.
Do you know who this is?
No. I've had
a pretty restricted childhood.
Comics were the devil's work.
It's Vampireniya.
- Who?
- She's an alien vampire.
Except she only attacks the ones
who really deserve it.
And even though she's a vampire,
she's a hero. She's not a
villain.
You do not want to mess with
Vampireniya. She is a badass
superhero.
Here.
Try it on.
This?
Wow.
You look amazing.
How do you feel?
Naked
Different.
And what else?
Powerful.
Yes. And?
Sexy.
That's what I love about this. I
mean, it allows me to be a
different person.
Like, someone who's
not so insecure.
Someone who's more confident
in their own skin.
Hey, but you're beautiful.
I'm sorry, maybe I misread that.
- No, it just, I
- No, don't worry about it.
I'm gonna go hop in the shower.
Just make yourself at home,
okay?
- Sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.
Don't worry about
it, okay? Okay.
Have you ever danced with the
devil in the pale moonlight?
That's Batman. What
the fuck? Really?
- Does it matter?
- Shit. Yeah.
Okay, well Hey, I
got a big web at home.
You wanna come check it out?
No, thanks. I prefer
normal furniture.
Fuck furniture.
Come on, I got lots of stuff
we could play with.
- No, thanks. I gotta get outta
here. - Hey, come on. Be a good
pussy.
I know you want it, come on.
I can sense it off you.
No. Get off me. Get off!
Hey, hey! There a problem?
No, we're cool. It's cool.
You okay?
We're just talkin'. It's cool.
What have we done to deserve
all these superheroes, huh?
Is God punishing us?
Look at this one.
- What do you want?
- Cheeseburger, no onions.
Indian food. Indian truck.
What's wrong,
your x-ray glasses broken, hey?
- I'll take vindaloo over rice.
- It's vindaloo.
Vindaloo, over rice.
Easy on the onions.
This is such a big night, I
dressed up. What do you think of
the suit, huh?
It's custom-made, everybody.
I got it at Party City.
What do you think, huh?
I am a robot.
- What do you need, tin boy?
- May I have a tequila sunrise?
Where do you think you
are, fucking Miami?
No, Brooklyn, New York City.
Latitude, 40/49/37/52 west.
- Longitude, 74/0/21. - You're a
pretty arrogant robot.
Dude, you ain't never gettin' in
past this door bitch.
Really, dude? I don't see
you winnin' any awards.
That's why I'm not in.
Maybe I'll just
slip her a 20 or somethin'.
It's never gonna work. This
is the door bitch from hell.
I'll take a tikka masala.
You're smoking?
- What happened?
- Nothing.
Really, I'm okay.
It was nothing.
Zoey, what happened?
I didn't see it coming.
Some guy groped me.
But it was nothing,
okay? I'm fine.
- What does he look like?
- I'm not telling you.
What did he look like?
Please, just let it go. Okay?
I'm okay. It's okay. It was
nothing.
Puff was there and stopped it.
He scared the shit out of the
guy.
Hey, Spidy.
Six eyes, huh?
I wonder, how many legs
do you actually have?
Wanna find out?
These are big words for a man
who hides in a kid's comic
character suit.
Is there a specific time I can
watch the metamorphosis into a
man?
Yeah, your web or mine?
Meet me out front in ten.
Yeah, you guys have
some mints or gum?
- You want both?
- Nah, I'll just take the mints.
- Fifteen dollars.
- What?
Your fucking with me, right?
I'll take the gum.
Twenty dollars.
Twenty dollars?
That's the biggest rip-off ever.
You want it or not?
I don't know how you
clowns get away with this.
Wait, we're the clowns?
Do you want the gum or not?
Thank you and fuck you.
Woah, wait a minute.
You took my 20 and
you say, fuck me?
Yeah, let me repeat
that for you. Fuck you.
And in case you have
a hearing impediment, fuck you.
I see what we're doing here.
We're doing this a movie-talk
shit.
Trying to outdo Pulp Fiction
on the fuck-you department.
Well, allow me to help.
Fuck you! Go fuck
yourselves, alright.
Fuck you, fuck your brother,
fuck your probably ugly fuckin'
sister,
- fuck your whole stinking
fucking family. - Hey now, what
the fuck.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Okay.
- Fuck you.
- Is that all you got?
- Fuck you!
- Fuck you, man!
- Fuck you, fuck you!
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
Fuck you. Who's next?
- Fuck you, man.
- Yeah, whatever, man.
I'm gonna weave you a web of sin
You're gonna walk right in
You're gonna walk right in
I'm Bob.
What's your name?
Fuck me.
That's a strange name.
Fuck, baby.
You touched my girl.
What?
- You touched my girl!
- Fuck!
CRASH
TALES OF THE STRANGE
COMING OUT IN AUGUST!!
LOS COMICS
THE SIX-EYED WONDER NO MORE!
What the fuck! Shit!
MERMAN
- Bullpen, bullshit. - That's
the game these days, alright?
You're lucky if you get a
starter that lasts six innings.
These soft little flowers
and their pitch counts, basta!
Enough already with these pitch
counts. Whitey Ford threw 263
innings in '61.
Vinny, these guys
are throwing 90 now.
- What is that shit? Sinatra?
- Oh, here we go.
People don't understand
the proper history.
You got a problem with Sinatra?
He's Hoboken's favorite son.
Sinatra hated Hoboken.
He called the place a dump.
He left in '48 and
never came back.
Vin, careful where you're
swingin' that thing, alright.
It's like I gotta educate
everybody, Frank.
Turn that shit off.
Come on, Vinny, they're about
to break down the draft.
You, shut up and learn.
Jimmy Roselli and Sinatra
started at the same time,
but Ol' Blue Eyes had him
blacklisted from working at any
clubs the families ran.
Ruined his entire career.
But Jimmy stood in Hoboken,
sometimes singing on the street
corners.
Listen to that.
He's got a voice like an angel.
Frank Sinatra couldn't
hold a candle to Roselli.
And in this establishment we
play Jimmy Roselli only.
Capiche ?
Vinny, for you, I'll
put it on vibrate.
Hey Vin, let me
ask you somethin'.
- How come your hair's always a
mess? - What do you mean?
You know, you just look like a
little bit of a hobo. Just, you
know
Maybe you get a
haircut yourself, huh?
They say cobbler's
kids have no shoes.
What does that mean?
It means, like,
you make shoes all day long,
the last thing you wanna do,
is make shoes.
Who's taking about shoes?
A cobbler is a shoemaker,
like, from the old country.
Hey kid, you know
what a cobbler is?
- It's a shoemaker.
- Shut the fuck up.
- Morning, fellas.
- Boys.
- Look what the cat dragged in.
- Hey.
- Joey, you got that stuff in
your car? - Sure do.
Alright. Tom and
Jerry, cool your jets.
Joey, bring the car around, put
the costumes in Jerry's trunk.
Jerry, give the kid your keys.
What are we getting?
- You mean, what costumes?
- Yeah.
Okay, alright
You two are going to join
the investigative task force
with two guys from
New York five.
The problem is, you two
jabronies don't know shit.
So that's why tonight,
you're gonna go undercover into
the club and find out everything
you can.
- Well? Alright, hey.
- Give me the keys.
Hey, oh, wait a minute
Jerry, what's a cobbler?
- It's a little a dessert
pastry. - No, like a person.
Oh, that's a shoemaker.
I guess I'm the only asshole
who doesn't know.
Alright, Vince. Quit fucking
around and finish this shave
already.
Victor, I was gonna
call you to explain
Have a seat, Steve.
Let me ask you a
question, Steve.
What business do
you think I'm in?
You're a bookie.
See, Mike? I told you
he'd get it wrong.
I'm not in the
gambling business.
I'm in the matchmaking business.
You see, there'll be
one schmuck like you
who's just certain
the Sox are gonna cover.
Another guy is just positive
the Yanks are gonna pull it out.
It's my job
to put you assholes together.
Now, when you don't pay me, you
just fuck up my whole business
model.
Carl, how much is he down?
- 39 grand.
- Victor
Shut the fuck up.
This is where the next words out
of your mouth better fucking be:
"I got your money."
I have about 15. I'll get
you the rest in the morning.
Where is it?
You know what I
call guys like you?
A shoe.
Steve, you are a shoe
and you stepped into shit.
Let's see if we can help this
shoe realize the urgency of this
matter.
Listen, I'll get you the rest.
Stop, guys. Hey, please!
No, please!
Victor, I'll get you the money.
I promise, I will.
Rip out two of his molars, Carl.
The back ones.
No!
No one wants to go to dentist
with fucked-up teeth.
Open your fuckin' mouth. Open
your fucking mouth right now!
Open your fuckin' mouth.
Oh shit, I fucking dropped it.
Fuck, fuck.
- He's fucking choking.
- Oh, shit.
We gotta get him up,
we gotta do that Heimlich thing.
Cut the fucking tape
off! Cut it off!
Fuck, what am I supposed to do?
- Put your fist under his rib.
- Yeah.
And hump him. Yeah.
You fucking idiots,
let me do this.
Old-school.
Spit it out, you fucking shoe.
Fuck! Shit! Fucking
shit! Fucking
Great job!
Fucking shoes.
What does it look like?
Boss, you should really
have that checked out.
And say what? I got hit by a
flying motherfucking tooth?
Fuck.
One day Am I clear?
Wow, lovely outfit.
It's Merman.
You know Merman?
Sure, badass super fish.
There's only one difference.
Fish don't have dick.
Well
First of all, they do have dick.
And secondly, I doubt you'd
know what to do with it,
on dry land or in the ocean.
But hey, the Hudson is two
blocks away, why don't you go
jump in and find out?
Hey, are you alright?
Why don't you go home?
It's not your night.
I come from the sea.
We all come from the sea.
Hey, you. What kind of candy
are you selling around here?
Hustling for twenties?
- No, thank you. Yeah, thank
you. - What the fuck? Fuckin'
freak.
Goodbye.
You know I hate to be mothered.
- Ciggy?
- Always.
Why don't you take tonight off?
I am good.
Oh
Ramses.
Go girl Go.
Are you sure?
I love you. You're my queen.
Look at that, just
like you said.
Hustlin' for twenties.
SEX SEX
You boys look a little lost.
We're from Swingster
Bay, little lady.
Women know how to treat a man
where we come from.
Now you're a long way from the
Doubletree you crawled out from
under.
I would get back into your canoe
while you still can,
and go home and fuck some of
your cross-eyed family members.
Now listen up, arse-clown.
Butter my butt!
POW!
Now you wait a minute.
Oh, you want to play too?
BONK!
Now you're stuck with me.
And I am not like them.
I was born in the
shadows of Jersey.
I was only a child when
I finished my first case of BBR.
The strength it gave me
And now you'll have
to fight a real man.
POW!
Hick Billy the fuck!
CRUUSH!
Tootles.
This is not over yet.
You slime You fucking You
You die tonight, you fucking
BLAM!
- Is she dead?
- She looks dead to me.
BREAK!
You broke my nail.
Gina
GINA KUNG FU CANDY!
COMING OUT IN AUGUST! LOS COMICS
Yes.
Hey man, I tried.
I couldn't get in.
How come?
Oh man, it was my fucking outfit
or something
Well, what were you wearing?
I don't know, I just threw
some fucking thing together, I
don't know.
These people, they are hardcore
about this. It is an art to
them.
You can't just wing this stuff.
You fucked up.
So now what the fuck do we do?
We gotta get in there somehow.
We gotta infiltrate.
I've been thinking.
You got a plan?
So what are you gonna do?
You gonna say no to me?
Go ahead, say no to me.
What are you gonna do?
What are gonna do, bitch?
You're gonna say no to me?
You gonna say no to this?
Say no to me,
bitch. Say no to me.
IT'S TIME FOR REVENGE!
I have prepared for this.
Nobody, and I say nobody,
will ever again say no to me.
AGENTS OF I.N.C.E.L.
So?
So, we still can't find him,
boss. Looked everywhere.
So what are you doing here?
So, I found this at
the dentist office.
So he's a freak, so what?
So, this is his assistant,
she has this night club act.
So?
So I bet you she
knows something.
I gotta lay low, the
heat is all over me.
You deal with the shoe.
I'll deal with the girl.
Done.
So what the fuck
are you waiting for?
- Now, what's your name?
- Black Tusk.
I love gettin' fuckin'
heckled by a tusk.
You can't give me a high-five
because it's a goddamn
Well, I don't even
know what that is.
Alright, here's Black Tusk
lookin' at me.
I'm reading your mind.
She's thinking, is
it a man or a woman?
Tusk, the answer is no.
We're good, right?
You talk to me here.
No real weapons here, buddy.
Alright, so our next performer
is gorgeous, she's beautiful,
she's a triple threat and she
So ladies and gentlemen,
she's the queen of Burlesque.
Put your hands together,
Miss Perle Noire!
I cannot fuck anymore.
What does that mean,
you can't fuck?
You mean, with the missus?
No matter what Astrid is trying.
And believe me
she's pulling out all stops.
It's just a classic mindfuck.
We all get that.
Dude, go see a professional. And
for god's sake, get some blue
pills.
How do I find a professional?
I'll set you up,
buddy. I got this.
Hey Thanks.
Fuck.
We're on the list.
Right. Of course you are.
You guys, the furry convention
is down the street.
You can go hug it out.
You gonna stop with the
laughing? Or I'm gonna run a few
checks on you guys.
You want me to run a few checks
on you guys? We're on the job.
Jersey?
It's Jersey.
Really?
Good luck, fellas.
Oh my god. Better every day.
MERMAN MYSTERIES OF THE DEEP
JFK, step on it.
But why Lima?
Sweetheart, you're
gonna love it.
They have gorgeous cliffs,
beautiful beaches.
And their teeth,
wait till you see their teeth.
Terrible. We're gonna be rich.
We'll live like kings. Terminal
Showtime.
Are you sure?
Say no! Say no to me!
Fucking bitch.
So you wanna play
superhero, bitch?
Hey, you.
Who the fuck are you?
- Where's my fucking money?
- What fucking money?
Here's the deal
Shit! Shit, fucking piece of
Hello? Yoo-hoo?
Victor? Victor Shima
Shima You shouldn't
be out here.
- Come on, Victor, you're goin'
to jail. - Let's go.
- So what's in the Bronx?
- Saying goodbye to someone.
Oh, yeah. Somebody close?
Not anymore.
Sorry to hear that. What
was it? Death in the family?
Why would I share that with you?
Well, here's the thing.
Either you can
lollygag on your phone,
or we can actually
have a meaningful conversation.
Motherfucker!
Yo, fuckface! What the fuck
is wrong with you, huh?!
Fuck off.
Anyways, I don't know you,
you don't know me.
You ain't gotta front
on a New York City cab driver.
At the end of the day,
you're not gonna see me again.
So this is the perfect
opportunity for you to express
yourself.
This car ride won't be long
enough for you to understand
anything about me.
So, why would it be meaningful?
You'd be surprised. Try me.
I have a girl that I love.
She's dead, but still alive.
For almost two years now.
When she's dead,
are you still gonna love her?
Of course.
Well, then Don't
give up on her.
Never ever give up on her. Don't
give up on anything that you
love.
- What's your name?
- Name's Jeff.
You seem like a nice guy, Jeff.
How did you get so wise?
Nine years of anger management.
I'm all fucked up.
You know what?
Change of plan.
I got ya.
Tell me what you see?
I'm with my girl.
Going to a party.
- Are you sure? - Yeah, he said
it's just down here.
So anyway
Some stairs, to a
kind of a basement.
Oh, there is loud music.
She knocks on the door.
Her head
That noise.
I'm paralyzed.
I'm paralyzed with fear.
This is not happening.
I want out. I want out!
Stay in it, Eni.
Where is Lia?
Eni, where is Lia?
She's gone.
I know the truth now.
And I'm ready.
I will make you proud.
I will do what's right.
For you, for us.
For everybody.
Where can I run
if it's not to my imagination?
Where I can make the rules
based on what matters to me?
Where I can face
the bad as a fantasy
and accept the
good without fear.
Some of us get confined by
definitions created for us and
never about us.
We're not made of such words.
We live our lives differently
because of that
misunderstanding.
We transform all the time.
Our reality is not the one
that the world expects from us,
my reality is
where I want to be.
I know I'm not alone
and I'm not afraid to do
what I have to do.
POLICE RECORD BROOKLYN RAPE 2016
DNA SAMPLE
DUPONT STREEWhat the fuck?
You touched my girl.
I don't run anymore.
THERE ARE SOME WHO LIVE
IN A DREAM WORLD
AND THERE ARE OTHERS
WHO FACE REALITY.
AND THEN THERE ARE THOSE
WHO TURN ONE
INTO THE OTHER.
Douglas H. Everett
Trick or treat, trick or treat,
trick or treat, trick or treat
Dressing up is for clowns.
You a clown? Huh?
Are you a clown, huh?
Mami , no!
Don't fight me.
Mami , no!
LOST COS
That's our missing Newark guy.
What's with the gills?
Beats me, you'd think
he could swim better.
Is that mine?
Got a bacon, egg and cheese with
tomato, just like you asked.
From Metro?
Yeah. The Greek guy wants to
know who the hell puts tomato on
a BEC.
It's good for my prostate. You
should eat tomato any chance you
get.
Shit.
Hey! What are you
kids looking at?!
A dead body, duh.
Did that guy get bit
by a shark or something?
- Maybe you should give him
mouth to mouth. - Alright, beat
it.
Hey, you kids get out of here.
This better be our guy,
getting me up at six a.m.
Nice, where's mine?
I got bacon and egg
or grilled cheese.
- That's fuckin' unbelievable.
- What?
It's from the Greek guy.
Not your fucking sandwich,
you fuckin' retard.
Merman! Are you seein' this?
This guy is good.
- No, I mean, you know, he was
good. - What's with the get-up
anyway?
It's called cosplay.
People dressing up like
comic book characters.
What, you never heard of it?
Some people take
this very seriously.
Yeah, the only thing missing
is the genuine fish smell.
Hey, you know what, let's have a
little respect, fellas. This is
Merman.
He's a super badass super fish.
He can swim faster than
anything man-made or otherwise.
Fuckin' Merman is
a fuckin' badass!
Yeah, well, somebody
fucked him up.
Obviously this is not the real
fuckin' Merman. What do we know?
His last credit card transaction
was from a club called Lost Cos.
His mother said he hung out
in these incel chat groups.
- Incest?
- Incel.
Involuntary celibates.
Guys who can't get laid.
They're tickin' time bombs.
The unfuckables.
Yeah, no kiddin',
who's gonna fuck that?
Yeah, alright, I'll see
you back at the station.
Cover him up. I don't want
the seagulls gettin' at him.
So I said to the check-out girl,
"If it say's 88 cents a pound,
then it should ring up 88 cents
a pound".
Am I right?
So while I'm arguing about that,
I look over and I see the
checkout,
but the bagging boy putting
everything into paper bags,
which I hate
- because the bottoms always rip
out. - Head back.
Have you ever been shopping
in a rainstorm
Now just relax, Lorraine.
Be a good girl and count to ten.
- One.
- One.
- Two.
- Two.
- Three, four, five
- Three, four, five
Lorraine?
Lorraine?
Lorraine?
You think Lorraine
is sweet on me?
Give me your money and I'll
give you my body, Lorraine.
Steve!
Give me some pack
and a number 4.
Sure you don't mean a five?
- What are you doing in a job
like this? - I like it here.
Lucky me.
You know I love you and as long
as you keep laughing at my bad
jokes,
you always have a job here.
Sweet.
Suction. Oh, by the way, I have
another package coming to your
place tonight.
You gonna be there?
What's the deal with these
packages, huh? Am I smuggling
drugs?
No, just dirty money.
What's that say? Tell me.
Coco Loco to win Aqueduct 6th.
Shit, turn on the
TV. Channel 582.
third, now he's going
on second. Tatter Trots
Come on, Coco Loco. Suction.
Is there anything
you don't bet on?
Pairs figure skating
That shit's fixed.
Run! Get up on the outside!
Tatter Trots ahead. And Monki
Shines makes a last minute ditch
for the
Ah, fuck!
Tatter Trots.
Shit.
finish, Monki Shines.
- Are you okay?
- All good.
More suction.
We interrupt this broadcast
for a message from your local
law enforcement agents.
The New Jersey Police
is asking for any information
regarding the circumstances
surrounding what is now known as
the Merman case.
The body found on the beach
- Eni. - is identified as
Jerrold Crimson.
The victim is known
to frequently dress up as Merman
and the police are asking
for any information
prior to his disappearance
on March 27th.
Eni?
Dr. Kristin, I really
need to see you.
It's happening again.
Trauma like this,
it needs to be dealt with.
Otherwise it will continue
to manifest itself.
The pain and rage that you're
feeling will not go away by
themselves.
Pills can help to ease
the intensity of the episodes.
But the memories of the events
can never be erased.
Together, we will work
through these memories,
and eventually you will find
some form of acceptance.
I don't want to go back.
I want to forget.
Here.
I want you to start with those.
Eni, you're going to feel
the effects of this medicine.
Expect that.
Your symptoms might actually get
worse before they get better.
This is no aspirin.
BTHEMAN You bite?
VAMPIRENIYA Who's asking?
BTHEMAN You suck?
BTHEMAN
You don't know who I am
BTHEMAN Yet.
BTHEMAN
I want to have you like
BTHEMAN
MERMAN!
BTHEMAN
Careful
BTHEMAN I'm coming for you
Hey
Yeah, just working out a bit.
Pick me up at ten.
Same spot, okay?
Home base, dip!
Watch my back!
Ben, I have your dinner.
Ben, are you ever going to come
out from behind that computer?
No, no, no!
Fine, I'll just leave it here.
Aron, where you goin', man?
You're runnin'
around in circles.
I am never gonna rank
up because of you.
Why do I even put
up with this shit?
You're a fucking noob, Aron.
No, no, no. Scramble!
Scram Fuck, man!
YOU ARE DEAD FOR: 9
You just fragged me, Aron!
You're supposed to be watching
my back, man. What the hell
Well, what's your kill count in
the last three rounds? Exactly.
You suck.
Whatever.
Did you see that
flyer I sent you?
Oh, the Vampire chick thing?
That's the chick Merman
was after! That's her!
I got my eye on
that Vampire slut.
Bitches They're all
bloodsuckers. I'm going in, man.
Tonight.
I am infiltrating, I got my
disguise. They won't know what
hit 'em.
In the name of our
soldier Merman,
this excuse of a whore
deserves the inevitable revenge.
The proper punishment needs
to be inflicted
and therefore, once
again I ask you.
You're not suggesting that I
Yes, you must once more
turn into our virgin vengeance.
I summon the ancient
Hand of Odin.
The self-gratifying.
Millions of cosmic energies of
wanton, change my self-entitled
form.
Let the power of your wrath, sin
and self-hatred run through your
veins!
I will rise from
this limp mortal shell into
Aron the Alpha Male!
Fuck!
You almost killed me there.
Okay, you're taking this vampire
shit too far.
I'm just trying to stay clear
from the creep at the corner
store, that's all.
I mean, look at him.
Day and night, he is
there waiting for me.
Doesn't get it. He thinks I must
come out of that door sooner or
later.
Stupid fuck.
Well, well, well. Look at you.
Oh, you look like a real kitty.
I love it.
I bought you something.
I'm sure you do not have this.
VAMPIRENIYA
It's the very first
one ever published.
How did you get this? Oh my god.
That is a classic.
I mean, it's a piece of art.
Look, she still has the sickle.
I love it so much.
Oh my god, thank you.
Btheman I'm watching you.
What's that?
Some asshole.
Shall we go?
Well, well, well.
Welcome home, ladies.
Look at you.
Now, move your asses.
You have less than 10 minutes.
Excuse you, ma'am.
Laura, you look beautiful.
Dee Dee Hi, sweetness.
Excuse me. Where's Ramses?
Ramsey, the bar needs change.
Bill!
So let me get this straight;
You hook up with drunk girls
by recharging their phones?
- Pretty much, yes. - And how's
that working out for you?
Hey Ricky, can I get
a charge. Please?
- See?
- Unbelievable.
Now I have a perfect body.
Because I have a supersonic
solar cell cyber-circuit smart
suit body.
Oh yeah.
Ladies, let's go.
Amazing!
You better tell me
what I want to hear.
- Oh no, I can't.
- Yes!
How was it?
- Okay, he was so romantic.
- Yes.
And he was nervous. And he wore
this little tie, little bow tie.
- Good for him.
- And he was all dressed up.
Guys, let's go.
Gemini is starting.
The most beautiful experience
we can have is the mysterious.
Every human being is part
of a whole we call Universe.
Welcome to our own
Universe: Lost Cos.
There's one question
you have to answer.
Are you a hero or a villain?
- Hero!
- Villain!
Look at what we've got here.
And just in time.
I've got some nasty roaches
dancing around the bowl.
Go get 'em, Spidy.
Word. It's only ten o'clock.
Oh no, dude. Can you just hold
it? Make sure no one passes
through.
I gotta pump up a little bit.
Go Spidy, go Spidy. Go!
Oh, that is so much better.
- Hey, you got some mints over
there? - For you, of course.
Five dollars.
Five dollars? That's like
the biggest rip-off ever.
Never mind. Thanks, though.
Hey, you guys have anything
to eat that won't make me stink?
So my brother here recommends
the chicken tikka masala.
It's gonna make you smell
like a bouquet of lilies.
Alright, whatever.
Hold.
- We're full.
- What?
Come on in.
I like your moves.
I'm good with animals.
Alright.
Thank you. Thank you, even
up there. I appreciate it.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Murray
Hill, a semi-famous comedian
from Brooklyn.
Let me hear it.
This isn't my double chin, it's
just my stomach coming up for
air.
And if you don't believe in
climate change well, first of
all you're an asshole
because it does exist,
it's happening right here.
It's 350 degrees.
You can cook an artisanal cheese
pizza from Bushwick in here,
that's how hot.
Alright kids, you ready
for a performance or what?
Alright, please enjoy
"The Birth of Vampireniya".
Did you lose you're fucking mind
out there? Look at this shit!
- You almost ripped me open.
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, man.
You're crazy. I'm not doing
this shit anymore, I'm fucking
Gene Simmons, the
front man, played bass.
The bassist was the front man?
Weird.
Well, they were grown men
wearing six-inch platform heels.
So weird is subjective, I guess.
So, did you have a
good time tonight?
I loved it.
I mean, the atmosphere, the
costumes So fun and free.
It's pure art.
It's a whole world
I never knew about.
Yeah, I was
introduced to it too.
I never knew it existed,
but now it's home to me.
I hope I didn't embarrass you.
What are you talking about?
No costume.
Come on.
- Where?
- Come on.
Oh my god, look at this place.
I know, I've got
quite a collection.
This is amazing.
Oh my god.
Wait, what is this?
This is Mizu, the android geisha
from the Fallen Warrior
Six Series.
- Okay.
- Here, look. It lights up.
Wow, that's beautiful.
Wait, what is that?
Hot glue, a costumer's
secret weapon.
So, who do you want to be?
I don't know.
OMG, this is perfect for you.
Do you know who this is?
No. I've had
a pretty restricted childhood.
Comics were the devil's work.
It's Vampireniya.
- Who?
- She's an alien vampire.
Except she only attacks the ones
who really deserve it.
And even though she's a vampire,
she's a hero. She's not a
villain.
You do not want to mess with
Vampireniya. She is a badass
superhero.
Here.
Try it on.
This?
Wow.
You look amazing.
How do you feel?
Naked
Different.
And what else?
Powerful.
Yes. And?
Sexy.
That's what I love about this. I
mean, it allows me to be a
different person.
Like, someone who's
not so insecure.
Someone who's more confident
in their own skin.
Hey, but you're beautiful.
I'm sorry, maybe I misread that.
- No, it just, I
- No, don't worry about it.
I'm gonna go hop in the shower.
Just make yourself at home,
okay?
- Sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.
Don't worry about
it, okay? Okay.
Have you ever danced with the
devil in the pale moonlight?
That's Batman. What
the fuck? Really?
- Does it matter?
- Shit. Yeah.
Okay, well Hey, I
got a big web at home.
You wanna come check it out?
No, thanks. I prefer
normal furniture.
Fuck furniture.
Come on, I got lots of stuff
we could play with.
- No, thanks. I gotta get outta
here. - Hey, come on. Be a good
pussy.
I know you want it, come on.
I can sense it off you.
No. Get off me. Get off!
Hey, hey! There a problem?
No, we're cool. It's cool.
You okay?
We're just talkin'. It's cool.
What have we done to deserve
all these superheroes, huh?
Is God punishing us?
Look at this one.
- What do you want?
- Cheeseburger, no onions.
Indian food. Indian truck.
What's wrong,
your x-ray glasses broken, hey?
- I'll take vindaloo over rice.
- It's vindaloo.
Vindaloo, over rice.
Easy on the onions.
This is such a big night, I
dressed up. What do you think of
the suit, huh?
It's custom-made, everybody.
I got it at Party City.
What do you think, huh?
I am a robot.
- What do you need, tin boy?
- May I have a tequila sunrise?
Where do you think you
are, fucking Miami?
No, Brooklyn, New York City.
Latitude, 40/49/37/52 west.
- Longitude, 74/0/21. - You're a
pretty arrogant robot.
Dude, you ain't never gettin' in
past this door bitch.
Really, dude? I don't see
you winnin' any awards.
That's why I'm not in.
Maybe I'll just
slip her a 20 or somethin'.
It's never gonna work. This
is the door bitch from hell.
I'll take a tikka masala.
You're smoking?
- What happened?
- Nothing.
Really, I'm okay.
It was nothing.
Zoey, what happened?
I didn't see it coming.
Some guy groped me.
But it was nothing,
okay? I'm fine.
- What does he look like?
- I'm not telling you.
What did he look like?
Please, just let it go. Okay?
I'm okay. It's okay. It was
nothing.
Puff was there and stopped it.
He scared the shit out of the
guy.
Hey, Spidy.
Six eyes, huh?
I wonder, how many legs
do you actually have?
Wanna find out?
These are big words for a man
who hides in a kid's comic
character suit.
Is there a specific time I can
watch the metamorphosis into a
man?
Yeah, your web or mine?
Meet me out front in ten.
Yeah, you guys have
some mints or gum?
- You want both?
- Nah, I'll just take the mints.
- Fifteen dollars.
- What?
Your fucking with me, right?
I'll take the gum.
Twenty dollars.
Twenty dollars?
That's the biggest rip-off ever.
You want it or not?
I don't know how you
clowns get away with this.
Wait, we're the clowns?
Do you want the gum or not?
Thank you and fuck you.
Woah, wait a minute.
You took my 20 and
you say, fuck me?
Yeah, let me repeat
that for you. Fuck you.
And in case you have
a hearing impediment, fuck you.
I see what we're doing here.
We're doing this a movie-talk
shit.
Trying to outdo Pulp Fiction
on the fuck-you department.
Well, allow me to help.
Fuck you! Go fuck
yourselves, alright.
Fuck you, fuck your brother,
fuck your probably ugly fuckin'
sister,
- fuck your whole stinking
fucking family. - Hey now, what
the fuck.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Okay.
- Fuck you.
- Is that all you got?
- Fuck you!
- Fuck you, man!
- Fuck you, fuck you!
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you.
Fuck you. Who's next?
- Fuck you, man.
- Yeah, whatever, man.
I'm gonna weave you a web of sin
You're gonna walk right in
You're gonna walk right in
I'm Bob.
What's your name?
Fuck me.
That's a strange name.
Fuck, baby.
You touched my girl.
What?
- You touched my girl!
- Fuck!
CRASH
TALES OF THE STRANGE
COMING OUT IN AUGUST!!
LOS COMICS
THE SIX-EYED WONDER NO MORE!
What the fuck! Shit!
MERMAN
- Bullpen, bullshit. - That's
the game these days, alright?
You're lucky if you get a
starter that lasts six innings.
These soft little flowers
and their pitch counts, basta!
Enough already with these pitch
counts. Whitey Ford threw 263
innings in '61.
Vinny, these guys
are throwing 90 now.
- What is that shit? Sinatra?
- Oh, here we go.
People don't understand
the proper history.
You got a problem with Sinatra?
He's Hoboken's favorite son.
Sinatra hated Hoboken.
He called the place a dump.
He left in '48 and
never came back.
Vin, careful where you're
swingin' that thing, alright.
It's like I gotta educate
everybody, Frank.
Turn that shit off.
Come on, Vinny, they're about
to break down the draft.
You, shut up and learn.
Jimmy Roselli and Sinatra
started at the same time,
but Ol' Blue Eyes had him
blacklisted from working at any
clubs the families ran.
Ruined his entire career.
But Jimmy stood in Hoboken,
sometimes singing on the street
corners.
Listen to that.
He's got a voice like an angel.
Frank Sinatra couldn't
hold a candle to Roselli.
And in this establishment we
play Jimmy Roselli only.
Capiche ?
Vinny, for you, I'll
put it on vibrate.
Hey Vin, let me
ask you somethin'.
- How come your hair's always a
mess? - What do you mean?
You know, you just look like a
little bit of a hobo. Just, you
know
Maybe you get a
haircut yourself, huh?
They say cobbler's
kids have no shoes.
What does that mean?
It means, like,
you make shoes all day long,
the last thing you wanna do,
is make shoes.
Who's taking about shoes?
A cobbler is a shoemaker,
like, from the old country.
Hey kid, you know
what a cobbler is?
- It's a shoemaker.
- Shut the fuck up.
- Morning, fellas.
- Boys.
- Look what the cat dragged in.
- Hey.
- Joey, you got that stuff in
your car? - Sure do.
Alright. Tom and
Jerry, cool your jets.
Joey, bring the car around, put
the costumes in Jerry's trunk.
Jerry, give the kid your keys.
What are we getting?
- You mean, what costumes?
- Yeah.
Okay, alright
You two are going to join
the investigative task force
with two guys from
New York five.
The problem is, you two
jabronies don't know shit.
So that's why tonight,
you're gonna go undercover into
the club and find out everything
you can.
- Well? Alright, hey.
- Give me the keys.
Hey, oh, wait a minute
Jerry, what's a cobbler?
- It's a little a dessert
pastry. - No, like a person.
Oh, that's a shoemaker.
I guess I'm the only asshole
who doesn't know.
Alright, Vince. Quit fucking
around and finish this shave
already.
Victor, I was gonna
call you to explain
Have a seat, Steve.
Let me ask you a
question, Steve.
What business do
you think I'm in?
You're a bookie.
See, Mike? I told you
he'd get it wrong.
I'm not in the
gambling business.
I'm in the matchmaking business.
You see, there'll be
one schmuck like you
who's just certain
the Sox are gonna cover.
Another guy is just positive
the Yanks are gonna pull it out.
It's my job
to put you assholes together.
Now, when you don't pay me, you
just fuck up my whole business
model.
Carl, how much is he down?
- 39 grand.
- Victor
Shut the fuck up.
This is where the next words out
of your mouth better fucking be:
"I got your money."
I have about 15. I'll get
you the rest in the morning.
Where is it?
You know what I
call guys like you?
A shoe.
Steve, you are a shoe
and you stepped into shit.
Let's see if we can help this
shoe realize the urgency of this
matter.
Listen, I'll get you the rest.
Stop, guys. Hey, please!
No, please!
Victor, I'll get you the money.
I promise, I will.
Rip out two of his molars, Carl.
The back ones.
No!
No one wants to go to dentist
with fucked-up teeth.
Open your fuckin' mouth. Open
your fucking mouth right now!
Open your fuckin' mouth.
Oh shit, I fucking dropped it.
Fuck, fuck.
- He's fucking choking.
- Oh, shit.
We gotta get him up,
we gotta do that Heimlich thing.
Cut the fucking tape
off! Cut it off!
Fuck, what am I supposed to do?
- Put your fist under his rib.
- Yeah.
And hump him. Yeah.
You fucking idiots,
let me do this.
Old-school.
Spit it out, you fucking shoe.
Fuck! Shit! Fucking
shit! Fucking
Great job!
Fucking shoes.
What does it look like?
Boss, you should really
have that checked out.
And say what? I got hit by a
flying motherfucking tooth?
Fuck.
One day Am I clear?
Wow, lovely outfit.
It's Merman.
You know Merman?
Sure, badass super fish.
There's only one difference.
Fish don't have dick.
Well
First of all, they do have dick.
And secondly, I doubt you'd
know what to do with it,
on dry land or in the ocean.
But hey, the Hudson is two
blocks away, why don't you go
jump in and find out?
Hey, are you alright?
Why don't you go home?
It's not your night.
I come from the sea.
We all come from the sea.
Hey, you. What kind of candy
are you selling around here?
Hustling for twenties?
- No, thank you. Yeah, thank
you. - What the fuck? Fuckin'
freak.
Goodbye.
You know I hate to be mothered.
- Ciggy?
- Always.
Why don't you take tonight off?
I am good.
Oh
Ramses.
Go girl Go.
Are you sure?
I love you. You're my queen.
Look at that, just
like you said.
Hustlin' for twenties.
SEX SEX
You boys look a little lost.
We're from Swingster
Bay, little lady.
Women know how to treat a man
where we come from.
Now you're a long way from the
Doubletree you crawled out from
under.
I would get back into your canoe
while you still can,
and go home and fuck some of
your cross-eyed family members.
Now listen up, arse-clown.
Butter my butt!
POW!
Now you wait a minute.
Oh, you want to play too?
BONK!
Now you're stuck with me.
And I am not like them.
I was born in the
shadows of Jersey.
I was only a child when
I finished my first case of BBR.
The strength it gave me
And now you'll have
to fight a real man.
POW!
Hick Billy the fuck!
CRUUSH!
Tootles.
This is not over yet.
You slime You fucking You
You die tonight, you fucking
BLAM!
- Is she dead?
- She looks dead to me.
BREAK!
You broke my nail.
Gina
GINA KUNG FU CANDY!
COMING OUT IN AUGUST! LOS COMICS
Yes.
Hey man, I tried.
I couldn't get in.
How come?
Oh man, it was my fucking outfit
or something
Well, what were you wearing?
I don't know, I just threw
some fucking thing together, I
don't know.
These people, they are hardcore
about this. It is an art to
them.
You can't just wing this stuff.
You fucked up.
So now what the fuck do we do?
We gotta get in there somehow.
We gotta infiltrate.
I've been thinking.
You got a plan?
So what are you gonna do?
You gonna say no to me?
Go ahead, say no to me.
What are you gonna do?
What are gonna do, bitch?
You're gonna say no to me?
You gonna say no to this?
Say no to me,
bitch. Say no to me.
IT'S TIME FOR REVENGE!
I have prepared for this.
Nobody, and I say nobody,
will ever again say no to me.
AGENTS OF I.N.C.E.L.
So?
So, we still can't find him,
boss. Looked everywhere.
So what are you doing here?
So, I found this at
the dentist office.
So he's a freak, so what?
So, this is his assistant,
she has this night club act.
So?
So I bet you she
knows something.
I gotta lay low, the
heat is all over me.
You deal with the shoe.
I'll deal with the girl.
Done.
So what the fuck
are you waiting for?
- Now, what's your name?
- Black Tusk.
I love gettin' fuckin'
heckled by a tusk.
You can't give me a high-five
because it's a goddamn
Well, I don't even
know what that is.
Alright, here's Black Tusk
lookin' at me.
I'm reading your mind.
She's thinking, is
it a man or a woman?
Tusk, the answer is no.
We're good, right?
You talk to me here.
No real weapons here, buddy.
Alright, so our next performer
is gorgeous, she's beautiful,
she's a triple threat and she
So ladies and gentlemen,
she's the queen of Burlesque.
Put your hands together,
Miss Perle Noire!
I cannot fuck anymore.
What does that mean,
you can't fuck?
You mean, with the missus?
No matter what Astrid is trying.
And believe me
she's pulling out all stops.
It's just a classic mindfuck.
We all get that.
Dude, go see a professional. And
for god's sake, get some blue
pills.
How do I find a professional?
I'll set you up,
buddy. I got this.
Hey Thanks.
Fuck.
We're on the list.
Right. Of course you are.
You guys, the furry convention
is down the street.
You can go hug it out.
You gonna stop with the
laughing? Or I'm gonna run a few
checks on you guys.
You want me to run a few checks
on you guys? We're on the job.
Jersey?
It's Jersey.
Really?
Good luck, fellas.
Oh my god. Better every day.
MERMAN MYSTERIES OF THE DEEP
JFK, step on it.
But why Lima?
Sweetheart, you're
gonna love it.
They have gorgeous cliffs,
beautiful beaches.
And their teeth,
wait till you see their teeth.
Terrible. We're gonna be rich.
We'll live like kings. Terminal
Showtime.
Are you sure?
Say no! Say no to me!
Fucking bitch.
So you wanna play
superhero, bitch?
Hey, you.
Who the fuck are you?
- Where's my fucking money?
- What fucking money?
Here's the deal
Shit! Shit, fucking piece of
Hello? Yoo-hoo?
Victor? Victor Shima
Shima You shouldn't
be out here.
- Come on, Victor, you're goin'
to jail. - Let's go.
- So what's in the Bronx?
- Saying goodbye to someone.
Oh, yeah. Somebody close?
Not anymore.
Sorry to hear that. What
was it? Death in the family?
Why would I share that with you?
Well, here's the thing.
Either you can
lollygag on your phone,
or we can actually
have a meaningful conversation.
Motherfucker!
Yo, fuckface! What the fuck
is wrong with you, huh?!
Fuck off.
Anyways, I don't know you,
you don't know me.
You ain't gotta front
on a New York City cab driver.
At the end of the day,
you're not gonna see me again.
So this is the perfect
opportunity for you to express
yourself.
This car ride won't be long
enough for you to understand
anything about me.
So, why would it be meaningful?
You'd be surprised. Try me.
I have a girl that I love.
She's dead, but still alive.
For almost two years now.
When she's dead,
are you still gonna love her?
Of course.
Well, then Don't
give up on her.
Never ever give up on her. Don't
give up on anything that you
love.
- What's your name?
- Name's Jeff.
You seem like a nice guy, Jeff.
How did you get so wise?
Nine years of anger management.
I'm all fucked up.
You know what?
Change of plan.
I got ya.
Tell me what you see?
I'm with my girl.
Going to a party.
- Are you sure? - Yeah, he said
it's just down here.
So anyway
Some stairs, to a
kind of a basement.
Oh, there is loud music.
She knocks on the door.
Her head
That noise.
I'm paralyzed.
I'm paralyzed with fear.
This is not happening.
I want out. I want out!
Stay in it, Eni.
Where is Lia?
Eni, where is Lia?
She's gone.
I know the truth now.
And I'm ready.
I will make you proud.
I will do what's right.
For you, for us.
For everybody.
Where can I run
if it's not to my imagination?
Where I can make the rules
based on what matters to me?
Where I can face
the bad as a fantasy
and accept the
good without fear.
Some of us get confined by
definitions created for us and
never about us.
We're not made of such words.
We live our lives differently
because of that
misunderstanding.
We transform all the time.
Our reality is not the one
that the world expects from us,
my reality is
where I want to be.
I know I'm not alone
and I'm not afraid to do
what I have to do.
POLICE RECORD BROOKLYN RAPE 2016
DNA SAMPLE
DUPONT STREEWhat the fuck?
You touched my girl.
I don't run anymore.