Lottery Ticket (2010) Movie Script

On this hot and steamy
fourth of July weekend...
...independence is all about the money.
Every grocery store, liquor store,
gas station and corner market...
...has long lines out its doors... people wait to purchase their
Mondo Millions lottery tickets.
Tonight's jackpot:
a record $370 million...
...has infected this city
with lottery fever.
We asked local residents
what they'd do with all that money.
l would give half the money to charity.
l would get drunk as hell.
l'd probably feed the whole world.
Enjoy life, you know.
l'd put it in my pocket.
l'm gonna go ski diving.
Hello, hello, hello. This is Mutt.
l quit.
What would you buy for yourself?
An all-white Versace suit.
Would you break up with your girlfriend?
l'd do the same thing l'm doing now.
-You wouldn't change a thing?
-l'm sorry, Mom. l wanna shop.
-l'd quit selling fruit.
So would you split the money fifty-fifty?
-l would change everything.
Probably a mail-order bride.
-l would paint for the rest of my life.
-l would lose my mind.
Have more fun.
''Oh, my gosh! l won! Yay!''
ls that a home-cooked meal?
Yo! Miss Carson!
lf you don't come in here
like you got sense...
...l'm gonna knock some into you.
My bad, Miss Carson. l didn't mean
to slam that door like that.
ls Kevin ready yet?
He's in his room.
All right. Cool.
You looking exceptionally well today.
What you been using,
cocoa butter and Jesus?
l forgot to tell you,
there's a dude that live down the street...
...he was almost in
The Temptations.
You should holler at him. l'm telling you,
you're single, sexy and saved.
Get out my face, boy.
Think about it.
l'm gonna take this to Kevin.
Now, who got more swag than me?
You ain't got no swag.
-Man, look at you.
-This is so good.
Why you always come over,
eating all my food?
Why you so stingy?
Be nice. Come on, l'm your best friend.
You need to eat, man.
Gotta buff up a little bit.
Don't put it on my bed, man.
Oh, my God, Kev.
-Ooh. So many smuts outside.
-What you talking about, ''smuts''?
Dip-offs, scrapes, women.
And they're wearing booty shorts
up to here, looking bad.
That's why l gotta look fly.
Which brings me to my next point.
Let me rock these.
-Hell, no.
-Why not?
l can't look like this?
It's 10,000 degrees outside.
Look at me, man. Look how l look.
l look like a homeless thug.
-No. No. No.
All right, l see how it is.
l'm telling your grandmama you stingy.
-Grown man - Man, be quiet.
Miss Carson!
Thanks for breakfast, Miss Carson.
Appreciate it. Appreciate it.
Hey, get out the way.
All right, Grandmama.
l love you. l'm out.
You're not gonna eat your breakfast?
No, because l'm gonna be late
for work.
Oh, but you have time
to iron your shoestrings?
l hope the little girls
you trying to impress is worth it.
''Little girls''?
Don't worry, Kevin ain't getting no pu
-l mean, Kevin doesn't have a girlfriend.
He doesn't let these Jezebels
get near him.
You know the one l'd like
to see you with, huh?
Here we go.
Oh, she's a bright girl
and she goes to church.
Grandma, look, we are just friends,
all right? That's it.
-All right, dear.
That would be nasty.
Suit yourself.
Now, wait a minute, here.
l want you to play my number for me
on the way home, okay?
And don't let nobody copy them
either. All right?
-l won't.
-Those are my numbers.
l dreamt them up last night.
They're out of the Holy Scripture.
You know something? Last night l dreamt
that l was waiting on the number 11 bus.
You'll never guess who was driving
when the bus pulled up.
And l said, ''Jesus, what are
you doing driving this bus?''
-You know what he said to me?
-No, ma'am.
He said, ''Child, it's a recession.
Times is hard.''
-That's what he said.
-You didn't ask me...
...but how did Jesus get a license
without a birth certificate?
-lt makes no sense.
-Out. Go.
Gotta think about that.
Man, get your ass
-Sorry, Grandma.
-l love you, though. Heh, heh.
-Ha, ha.
Bye, baby.
-Tell your girlfriend, get her panties from me.
-l'm talking about Ashley.
-Smell that.
-Nigga, that's Shaniqua.
Ben-Ben. Ben-Ben.
-Hey, hey, hey.
What's up? Y'all ain't speaking?
What's up, Semaj? How you doing?
-What y'all up to?
Going to work.
Going to work.
Going to the court, you know?
Sell some knickknack paddywhacks.
Give a dog a bone.
Why you so fidgety?
You gotta pee-pee or something?
-You gotta pee?
Huh? The bathroom right inside.
l'm just excited about going to work.
-l'm really trying to go to work.
Let's leave.
-All right, Semaj.
Hey, yo, you heard
about that girl Ebony?
Up in Building 6?
-That big-booty chick, right?
-Yeah, big booty.
-That one. Okay. Yeah.
-Oh. Big booty. Big booty. All right.
-She bought 50 lottery tickets.
Damn, are they on sale?
-l need to work where she works.
Hey, hold up.
Listen to what l'm trying to say.
Now, you all could do yourself a favor,
stay up off that court.
Because your boy Lorenzo Mack,
he done got out of jail.
-He got out?
-l seen him and his boys on that court.
Maybe y'all ought not
be hanging out there.
-Semaj, it's 9:00 in the morning.
How in the hell do you get this gossip?
First of all, it's not gossip.
-lt's information.
All right.
Give me a haircut
when you get a chance.
You ought to get it cut right about now.
Kind of nappy in the back.
Damn. Let me go to work
with you today.
-You ain't going.
-Hell, no.
Hey, young blood.
Yo, l need some beef jerky...
...and a Cherry Coke.
Yeah, that's it?
l guess so.
What's up? What?
Why you gotta talk to old dude?
You know he's crazy.
There ain't nothing wrong with
Mr. Washington.
He's a lunatic, Kevin.
He been in that apartment
before my mom was born.
He still got slave dust on him, dude.
l'm telling you, man. l think
Mr. Washington a serial killer, for real.
He eats beef jerky?
Who the hell eats beef jerky, Kevin?
Telling you, he on some mass-destruction,
Osama bin Laden-type stuff. Seriously.
You need to stop treating people
like that.
You always do that.
Since we was little, you be doing that.
l'm not making ''rest in peace'' shirts.
-You ain't that creative.
-Don't call me collect from heaven.
Now that, bitches,
is what you call a sports car, man.
Man, check this thing out, man.
Yours for the low, low price of...
...oof, 1.4 mil!
So that's what you would get? A car?
Hell, yeah. l'd get a car
with that kind of money.
-You simple son of a bitch. Ha, ha.
-Ha, ha, ha.
l'm simple, but he don't know
how to put lotion on.
But l'm simple, though?
Hey, get your ashy ass up out here, man.
lf l won the lottery? If l won?
Boy, l'd get my ass
one of them helicopters.
-l'd be flying in one of them choppers.
-What, a helicopter? What the hell?
l hope Semaj was lying
about letting Lorenzo out.
He the last person l wanna see.
Keep the thugs in jail.
You know what l'm saying?
Boy, you know you're late, right?
What, l'm supposed to wait
ror you rorever?
Why you always down my back?
You got a watch,
you act like you can't tell time.
Could you stop arguing? Please?
Know what l'm saying? Come down here.
l'll be down in a second.
While you sitting in bumper-to-bumper
traffic in your Brigatti
Flying over that joint in all
state-of-the-art equipment...
...leather interior, GPS.
Even a PlayStation with
the plasma screen with a beat.
And l can't forget the feet up with
them 24-inch gold spinners on there.
lt would kill y'all!
Nigga, you can't put rims on a helicopter.
Ain't got no damn wheels!
Broke people. Look at them.
What you talking about, broke?
There's a man that knows something.
Ask Kevin.
Tell me, if you won the lottery,
would you rather get a sports car...
...or would you get a helicopter?
l don't even play the lottery.
Don't answer that.
lt's designed to keep poor people poor
by selling them false dreams.
Man, y'all know that.
Somebody give him a bow tie
and a bean pie.
-lt's Obama in the house.
-What is wrong with you?
Are you serious?
You in Rainbow PUSH yourself?
Come on.
Martin Luther King,
can you pick one?
-Just pick it.
Just one. Not rocket science.
-That's what l'm talking about.
Why make him think you can have
a helicopter in the projects?
-Can y'all clear the way?
We're good, we're good.
l am very disappointed in you.
See, there goes chocolate drop,
chocolate drop, chocolate drop.
Look at you, darling. Lookie.
-She turn 18 yet?
-Stop it. Just stop it right now.
-What the hell you hit me for?
-Stop it now.
l'm saying you don't got a job.
-And? What?
-l got a job.
-You got a job?
-Hell, yeah.
Benny, please.
You ain't got no daggone job.
l told you the smuts was out today.
You need to holler at Nikki Swayze
before l do.
-Are y'all coming or what?
-What am l gonna say to Nikki?
l don't know. Ask her for her
Social Security number or something.
-lt's your chance.
All right.
Get it.
Hey. Um....
Hey, um, look. Ahem. Nice dog.
l was just wondering if, like... wasn't doing nothing
Hello? So now we gotta be late to work
just so he could talk to her?
Yep. Stop hating.
Well, l saw you during graduation.
You might not have saw me.
Because l was sitting in the back.
You know? But l was there.
-You always got me, Stacie.
-You know what? What the hell?
-But l was
-Do me a favor, Devin?
-Yeah. What you need?
-Throw that away.
Thanks, Devin.
lt's - It's Kevin.
-What's up, baby?
-Hey, how you doing?
Get in the car, baby.
-Come on, girl.
She gave you doo-doo.
You were supposed to get
the number, not doo-doo.
What's up, now?
Why they keep looking at us like that?
Your baby cousins?
They, like, the same size. That's so cute.
K-Ci and JoJo. Hey, man, you can't
get no girl in no Foot Locker shirt.
Ooh, yeah
Go make the 'hood look good.
Hey, l wear size 12.
See, man, she likes this corny-ass Giovanni.
This corny ass.
Dog, there go Lorenzo.
-Don't even look at him. Just keep walking.
All right.
Ain't no thing, we got places to go.
Get your bitch ass over here, slim.
And bring Mr. Foot Locker with you.
-l think he saw me.
-Because you looked at him.
Y'all don't have to go over there.
-Come on, man.
What's up, Lorenzo?
How was your vacation?
They got cell phones in prison now.
You should've hit me up.
You know what l'd do to
a bitch like you in my ''cellie''?
l'll make you snuggle up with me
at night.
And l'll squeeze you.
l squeeze you.
l squeeze you.
And l squeeze you!
Next time, it's your rib cage.
You feel me?
All right, let's go.
-l'm sorry.
Bring your ass, let's go.
Hey, Foot Locker.
-What's up?
-When them new Jordans drop?
-They dropped Wednesday. What's good?
-Oh, word?
-All right.
Hook us up with three pairs.
We'll be by later to pick them up.
Hook you up?
-As in, like, hook you up?
-Just spit it out, Rain Man. What?
-You buying them?
-lf l was gonna buy them...
...what l need you for?
He got you. Don't worry about that.
Yo, think before you speak. Okay?
l blame the school systems, really.
No child left behind?
You left behind, Negro.
Close your mouth.
We got all the shoes you need.
-Get off the court.
-We out.
-We got him.
''We''? Dude, that's me.
You don't work at Foot Locker, nigga.
Where my ball at?
You just got me killed.
You might as well grab the gun,
put it to my head and pull the trigger.
lt's too hot to be picking up some shoes.
Lorenzo's a bitch.
He ain't gonna pick up them shoes.
-Free Jordans?
-Oh, yeah, you're right.
And you, you lucky.
You get to go off to college
while we're stuck here.
You know what? Don't start.
Man, you need to speak for yourself, bro.
l'll be rich.
l have my business plans
plotted out right now.
You could still apply to design school
if you really wanted to, Kevin.
Yeah, l can,
but design school costs money.
Besides, if l go,
who gonna watch my grandmother?
Other than Jesus, l'm all she got.
And right now Jesus ain't
paying the rent. Straight up.
He ain't gonna show up, Kev.
Fourteen minutes and 32 seconds late
there, Kevin.
That's coming out of your paycheck.
Heh, heh.
Yeah, l figured that.
For someone who has his aspirations
on being assistant manager...'re not showing me much.
There's more to the job
than just knowing about shoes.
Remember that.
-You like what you see?
Man, them joints is crazy.
-How much are those?
-About 5000.
-Five thousand what? Dollars?
You gotta be kidding me.
For some sneakers?
Hold on. They're not just sneakers.
These are Clark Kent limited-edition
Air Force 1s.
The mesh, that's all original.
From the original Air Force Highs
that dropped in 1982.
Look at the elephant print
from the original Retro Jordan Ill's.
Yeah, he put up big numbers
against Bird in those.
l'll get them one day.
Man, they're just shoes.
Yeah, all right. Well, maybe to you...
...but not to me.
Can l get some help?
Can somebody help me, please?
-Can somebody service this customer?
-l can, sir.
l can service you, sir. How -? Um....
What can l do you for? Heh, heh, heh.
Not you.
-Uh, Kevin?
Come here.
Be right with you.
Keep your eye on them.
They look like riffraff.
Man, you have no idea.
Fellas, what can l help y'all with?
Y'all want the T-shirt?
Shut up.
Give me some 12s, some 13s, all right?
Black joints with the swoosh on the side.
And l know they got them because l called
to make sure when they was in stock.
Usually l work the register. l didn't
Will you go get the shoes? Chop-chop.
Hey, check it out, man.
lf those don't fit, there's another
Foot Locker you can go to.
-No, they fit.
-All right.
You know, when l was a kid...
...if l wanted some new pairs of shoes...
...used to have to steal them
off niggas' feet. Just rob them.
But thanks to you,
we got new shoes fresh out the box.
That's love, man.
-Got it.
-So how much l owe you?
You gonna pay?
Don't you know crime don't pay?
You stupid.
Hey, man, y'all want no socks?
No bag? All right.
Just walk right out the store.
-Carry them all like that.
Where you going?
You little bitch!
Yo, no, l didn't do nothing!
Yeah, l know that.
Part of what you didn't do
is pay for the shoes.
Yo, yo, he gave them to us. Ask him.
Ask that brother there.
He said it was a gift.
ls that true?
Well, did you or did you not?
No. l didn't.
Let's go.
You're a dead man. You hear me?
You're a dead man!
Wait a minute. He fired you for that?
Yes. Right on the spot.
He didn't even hesitate.
-Kevin, l'm so sorry.
-Look, l mean, it is what it is.
l mean, who cares?
Like.... It's fine.
What's it say?
-Some nonsense.
-Don't do that, it's bad luck.
-lt don't even matter.
You're right.
l don't wanna spoil all the good luck
l've been having.
You know what? Just take it, okay?
Come on, Stacie.
And eat your food.
You can lean in the window a bit
more next time. Don't be scared of me.
And here you go. Appreciate it.
l can transform you
-Kev. What's happening?
-You tell me.
You came for the lottery too?
-You stood in that line?
-The machine just broke.
-What do you mean, it broke?
l just broke the machine.
l'm joking. l know your mama
would beat the black off you.
You gotta come and play them numbers.
-How many tickets you need?
-l just need one.
-Just one?
-Yeah, just one.
Ring me up for this Cherry Coke.
And let me get two beef jerkys.
Nasty combination.
Sure you wanna do that to your stomach?
And, yeah, play those numbers for me.
Give me this, give me this, give me this.
Here you go.
-All right.
-Enjoy this.
You sure you don't want one
for yourself?
Three hundred and seventy million.
No, man, that's not me. l don't really
do that whole lottery thing, man.
Three hundred-seventy million.
You can't be too cool for that.
-All right.
-Do it. There we go.
Give me some numbers.
l need numbers, l need numbers.
l wasn't, but....
People rushing me like l'm
taking a long time. Here you
Oh, and then you pull out
the fortune cookie. Okay, that's cool.
Get your chang-wang numbers.
lf you win, you gonna put the money
in that hole in your shirt?
That what you gonna do? Walk safely.
Watch out for the people.
You gonna come here
and ruin everybody day?
Your vibe is just ignorance today.
That's how you spell ignorance: Y-O-U.
Come on.
Your house, right now.
Hold on. Oh, hold on.
Yo, Kevin. Kevin. Kev!
Yo, Kevin, man, you okay? You cool?
Yeah, man, what's up?
l heard what happened with Lorenzo.
The neighborhood's talking.
What you mean, they're?
Weren't nobody even there.
They said you set him up
and you snitched on him to the cops.
-Why'd you snitch on him?
l ain't snit
-Everybody think l'm snitching?
-That's what they said.
Man. Damn!
Yeah, damn.
Shake it off, you can find another job.
What up, bitches?
Who you calling ''bitch''?
l'll beat your ass, man.
l don't play that voodoo shit.
You better get up out of here with that.
You just could not wait.
-Come on.
Y'all know l ain't no snitch.
When you ever heard me snitching?
This nigga about to get killed.
l got everything for
Man, not even a ''thank you.''
Thank God.
l was so worried.
Let me look at your face.
Are you all right?
l'm okay. How'd you even hear about it?
Semaj came over.
Borrowed some toilet tissue.
Here you go.
l played your numbers for you.
What you gonna do?
Well, l just wanna go to bed.
-Good evening, I'm Bonnie Berry.
-Hey, Miss Bonnie.
Here's tonight's Mondo Millions
drawing for a jackpot of $370 million.
Come on, Jesus.
To win, all you have to do
is match all five white balls... the Mondo Ball.
-A whole lot of Mondo.
-Let's get started.
We gotta get it. Come on.
Seventeen. Seventeen.
The first number is...
l ain't got no 42.
Oh, damn, damn, damn!
l'm standing with
the owner of Junior's Market...
...where last night's winning
Mondo Millions jackpot ticket was sold.
Oh, Lord Jesus.
We understand the winner
hasn't come forward yet?
That's right. No, they have not.
The thing is, it's killing me...
...because l'm supposed to get
$10.000 just for selling the ticket... know what l'm saying?
lf you're out there watching
and got the winning ticket...
...holler at your boy Junior, man.
Daddy got bills to pay, baby.
Talking about he got bills to pay?
We all got bills to pay, huh?
-Also, l wanna shoutout
-Whoever does have that ticket....
- a piece of paper worth $370 million.
And just in case you missed it...'s another look
at the winning numbers.
The first winning number is 42.
That ain't nowhere near 17.
followed by 33.
Next we have four.
And 32 and 45.
And the all-important Mondo 8all
number is Number 21.
Experts say the chances of winning
is 1 in 175 million.
-You okay, boy?
-Get money.
We won the lottery.
Ah. Now, come on, Kevin.
No, no. Grandma, look.
Grandma, we won the lottery!
Now, let me see here.
Four, 32, 33...
-You got all six numbers.
-Yes. We won.
Grandma, we won!
Ooh! Ooh!
Oh, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!
Just wonderful!
-Oh. Oh.
l gotta call somebody!
Call? No! No! Don't! No!
No. Don't you
No. You can't call people.
Look, you gotta keep this between us.
Nobody can know about this, all right?
-Only me and you know.
-That's it. You have to promise me.
-Okay, okay, l promise.
-l just got all excited.
-Oh, shit.
Wait. l can't say ''shit''
in my grandmother's house.
-Oh, you sure can't.
-l'm sorry.
-Oh, Lord. Lord.
-Okay. Okay, Grandma.
Settle down, Grandma.
l just need to go down to Junior's
and figure out how to turn this ticket in.
No! Don't you leave that house
with this ticket.
-And why?
-Well, what if somebody was to?
What if you was to get?
-Oh, Lord Jesus. Child.
Spit it out.
l never thought l'd have to use this.
-You got a pistol?
-Wait on it.
Grandma, no!
-What is it, then?
-Holy water. From the Catholic church.
-The Lord here! Be with you!
-Because the Lord is with me!
-lt's cold.
What you doing?
Here. No!
-l'm sorry, baby.
Look, l just wanna go outside
and just go down to Junior's...
-...and just get some information.
-Okay, then. All right.
Nobody knows about this ticket.
l ain't telling nobody.
l wouldn't tell nobody.
-You promise?
-l promise.
Only me and you know this, now.
l could be asleep right now.
Just thank God you woke up.
That's so clich to say that.
l wanna go to sleep.
-My job is to sleep in.
Damn, she's fine.
-You wish you'd get a girl like that.
-Finer than you.
Yeah, good luck. Ha, ha.
This is the same white dude
poking holes in your condoms.
-Give me a second, l'll be right back.
-Excuse me, fellas.
Don't steal nothing.
Slow the beat down and feel it like that
Hey, man. Let me talk to you
real quick, all right?
Talk to me through this window?
Get your ass over there.
-What's the difference?
-l don't know, let's go.
-Look, man, quick question.
Right, say it's the person,
whoever wins the ticket.
-They come here to claim it.
How does that work?
You write a check for the whole amount?
Okay, so you saying that
l got $370 million in here.
That's.... l don't have that.
l can write you a check for $600...
...and then you gotta take the Mondo
Millions ticket to the lottery district office.
Where's that? Upstate?
No, it's downtown.
It's where l get all the tickets from.
Downtown. Come on.
Fix your dreads.
You need to steal some Tic Tacs.
Let me ask you a question.
Why you acting all suspicious and whatnot?
Me? What? l'm not acting suspicious.
l'm just excited.
Beep, beep, beep. What?
What are you talking about?
Oh, man.
''Violence Erupts in Downtown.''
-That's great.
-Oh, shi
-Shut up.
Sit down. See?
That's why l didn't
l'm sorry, ma'am.
l'm sorry, sir.
lf l move my hands off your mouth,
will you be quiet?
-You won't say a word?
Give me that.
-Act normal, sit up.
-You act normal. You sit up.
-Don't be telling me what to do.
-Don't tell me what to do.
If this is real, right?
Do you know who you are?
-Right. l know.
You like the Moses of the projects.
-Look, no more WIC cards.
You could take Grandma to Vegas.
Buy her a castle.
You could take your girl to Venus
and still have money left over.
Look, the sooner l turn the ticket in,
the safer l'm gonna feel.
lt's on. Come on.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
Let's get this money.
l can really smell the money.
-What's up, man?
-My man?
-Quit mopping for one second.
-This is the lottery district office, right?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah, hey.
Where everybody at?
Everybody at lunch?
Yeah. Where?
-What you mean?
-What you talking about?
For the Fourth of July.
Be open again Tuesday, 9 a.m.
-l hate Fourth of July.
Man, that's three whole days.
Know how much shit can happen
in three days?
Let's just think about this.
Me, you and your grandma
are the only ones who know.
lf they knew back home,
you'd have already been shot.
-Am l right?
-Yeah, but
You're making this sound real easy
right now.
Come on, Kevin.
You tell me, what can go wrong?
Oh, happy day
Drop it like it's hot for Jesus!
Oh, happy day
-Oh, happy day
l dropped it like it was hot! Ha, ha, ha.
Jesus Christ
l'm sorry.
-What was that? You scared me.
l'm sorry.
l didn't mean to startle you.
l just was walking by,
l heard all the noise.
-What's all the celebrating about?
-No, no celebrating.
l ain't seen you this happy since you
found out shrimp went to 2.99 a pound.
What you doing? Having a fish fry?
l don't smell nothing. What's going on?
-What you got?
-l can't say nothing.
-What's that behind your back?
-l can't say nothing.
-Come on, you can tell me. You can tell me.
Come on, come on.
You know, most of the drug dealers,
like the big ones, shit, the bosses...
...they weigh they money.
-Because they can't count it.
-l heard about that. Right.
Man. Somebody stole from them,
they'd know.
-''They tried to steal my money!''
-Stop, stop, stop.
You gonna be a boss, son.
-Stop. Damn.
-Oh, my gosh.
l wonder, does Oprah weigh her money?
-Kevin, where everybody at?
-Good question.
Hey, little man, where everybody at?
Oh, you don't know.
-Let's spring to my crib real quick.
-There he is. There he is right there.
l'm here, baby.
Get out the way! Move out the way!
Y'all move away from here!
Grandma. What's up?
You called everybody?
l ain't called nobody.
l ain't called nobody.
Semaj, he come over here. Then he goes out
and come backs with all these people.
Hey, come on, Kev, let's go
to the strip club. Make it rain!
-l just wanna touch it. l just wanna touch it.
-Touch what?
You ain't gonna touch shit.
l know your daddy. He still owe me
money from a craps game in '89.
-You gotta help pay
-My medical insurance.
Damn your medical insurance.
Yo, Kevin, l got an investment idea
that can't miss.
Two words, man: massage toilet.
Now, all l need is the money.
Come on!
Come on! Go, go, go!
Come on!
All right, your crib! Come on!
Come on, my window,
my window, my window!
Come on. Go, go!
Where'd he go?
Dude. Ain't no way.
Ain't no way l'm making it
to Tuesday, dog. Uh-uh.
Kevin. Get up. l got a plan.
This here is what we call
the underground railroad, Kevin.
Many slaves have used this to escape.
We can escape, Kevin.
We can get out the 'hood, right?
We go through Indiana,
go through Michigan.
Harriet Tubman did it.
We follow the North Star.
-Then we sing Negro spirituals.
l always wanted to sing Negro spirituals.
Let me live my dream.
We leak that, right?
Turn it into a mix tape, right?
A mix tape of Negro spirituals. Let's go!
What's wrong with you?
Man, get off the floor.
The money's in my head.
-Three hundred-seventy million.
-Just listen.
Look, all we need is something simple.
That's it, something simple.
We'll just pretend like
the ticket's a fake, then.
Ticket's a fake!
That's it. That's it.
-You could say you made it up.
-Hell, yeah. They already think you a snitch.
They'll think you a snitch and a liar.
Stick to the plan.
The ticket is fake, okay?
Remember when Steve Harvey had hair?
It was what? Fake.
Kim Kardashian's ass is what?
-Fake. Everything, fake.
-There we go.
Back up. Back up. Everybody back up.
Back up, little mama.
That go for you too, James.
My name is Semaj. ''Back up''?
Nigga, your name James.
Just because you spell it backwards
don't make it different. It's James.
Better move your hair-cutting ass back.
-No problem, bro.
-And that go for everybody else out here.
Y'all better start showing this man
some respect...
...and quit running around
acting like wild-ass animals.
Thank you.
-Like the way l handled that?
We was thinking that you need,
like, a entourage, yo.
Hell, yeah.
Hey, Kev, anything you want, man.
-Hey, you ever seen my little sister lately?
-Nigga, she real cute and l hear she a freak.
Hey, Tanisha! Operation Lay Down
With a Millionaire is in effect.
Everybody listen!
Hevin! Hevin! Hevin!
-Wait, wait, wait.
-We love you, Kevin.
l wanna have your baby.
l been trying to get you pregnant
for the longest.
l know your mama.
Look, just the other day
everybody thought l was a snitch.
But the other day you wasn't rich.
-So, what you want me to do?
-l say you roll with it.
You hear that? ''Kevin. Kevin. Kevin.''
All right, everybody.
Everybody, please, please, please.
What l was trying to say...
...was that, Fillmore,
we on now, baby!
l'm gonna get a jet!
l'm gonna get a jet!
l'm gonna get a jet!
-Kevin, l just heard. l just heard.
-Hey, hey.
Hold up. You just can't be running up
on Mr. Carson like that these days.
Man, what you doing?
Pointing a gun at Stacie?
You know we love Stacie.
No. Y'all wrong.
Stop. Stop. Stop.
l'm just saying, she might have something.
-What is all of this?
My entourage?
Look, it's just for protection.
Half these cats out here trying to kill me,
you know that.
-Hey, look. Forget that.
You know where l got the numbers?
-That fortune cookie from your job.
-You're lying.
-No, l swear to God.
-Are you serious?
Boy, how you gonna win off my fortune
cookie and not tell me? Where is my cut?
Your cut? You don't be hooking me up.
-When l come over and l get the kung pao
-l hook you up all the time.
Yeah, with the sample.
You don't even have to go
to design school.
You could start your own shoe company.
Yeah, l guess l could.
That is all you been talking about
since you were 9 years old. This is it, Kevin.
-You okay?
-Yeah, just....
l mean....
Man, l don't know, Stacie. Man, it's a lot.
It's a lot. l'm not even gonna lie to you.
l know, but trust me, l got you.
You're good.
-Oh. l'm worried now.
-Okay? You know.
Hey, Kevin.
Hold on.
What's up, Nikki?
-l owe you an apology.
l was so rude to you yesterday
and l been feeling horrible ever since.
Look, it's cool.
You know, l understand.
-l ain't tripping. It's all good.
l don't think you do, Kevin.
l've always thought
that you were so fine.
Yesterday, when you came up to me,
l guess l just didn't know what to say.
Wow. Heh.
l was hoping maybe you'd give me
a chance to make it up.
Are you busy tonight?
Hell, no, he ain't.
My mother's gonna be gone.
Maybe we can go out somewhere...
...and then later you can come back
and keep me company.
You'll let me do that?
l mean
Cool. Yeah, we can
l promise, Kevin, you will never, ever...
...ever forget tonight.
See you later.
Later, if you want, you can
Ieave your panties at my house.
My house.
Damn, Kev. Did she touch your face?
Yeah, and my stomach.
That ass is priceless!
That's what you like?
That's what you like?
Please tell me you did not
just fall for that.
That bitch is beyond trifling.
-Come on, Stacie.
l smell jealousy.
-Jealousy is in the air.
-No, no, no. It is so obvious.
Only reason she came over,
she heard about your ticket.
Wait. You saying my boy
ain't good enough... get a girl like Nikki Swayze
without money?
No. What l'm saying is yesterday
she handed you a bag of shit, right?
Today, suddenly she wants to screw you.
Is that a coincidence?
Come on.
-Whatever. Do what you wanna do.
Stace, don't be like that.
-Stacie just being Stacie, man.
-l ain't got time for this.
You need to be thinking about
where you gonna take Nikki.
-Already got it covered.
-She gonna bring her friends?
-l already got the spot.
-Okay, where we going?
-Y'all ready?
l'm gonna take her
to that new Waffle House.
-No, man.
-Goddamn Waffle House!
You can't take her there.
Not no ghetto spot, man. You a baller now.
You gotta take her to a place like, um....
-What's that joint called?
Dolce Vittoria.
Hey, dog.
That's where all the rich people go, man.
Y'all forgetting, l ain't got no money.
l'm just as broke now as l was yesterday.
l can't get that money until
l turn in that ticket. You know that.
-That's true, yeah.
-Oh, you need money?
lf you need money,
l can get you some money.
How are you gonna get me some money?
Man, l know a dude
that got stacks of money.
l mean, he got packs of money.
-Racks of money.
Y'all vouch for him?
What? That's our boy.
Let's go get this stimulus package,
l told y'all l knew where
to get the money from.
l know Sweet Tee and them
for years.
l know all his brothers and everybody.
What's up, Jimmy?
-You, you. Come on.
Come on.
-This your boy?
This better not be no bullshit, man.
Did l stutter?
-What's up, Jimmy?
-Get off the steps.
-Hold on, big man.
-Broke-ass Cosby kids.
Man, tell Sweet Tee l here, Jimmy.
-Jimmy. Jimmy.
-This supposed to be your hookup.
Jimmy always be playing like this.
He like the practical - Jimmy!
He don't know you.
Open the door, man.
Jimmy, you crazy as hell, man.
You got me this time, Jimmy. Jimmy!
Hey, look, if you need me for anything,
l'll be out here chilling.
Hey, fellas. Over here.
-Do you know who l am?
-Yeah, l heard of you before.
What have you heard about me?
You know, just stuff like how...'re like the Godfather
of the projects. Stuff like that.
Well, to my friends l go by Sweet Tee.
And l'd like very much to be
your friend, Kevin.
First of all, let me say congratulations
on your newfound wealth.
lt's always a wonderful feeling
when you make your first few million.
l'd also like you to accept this loan
as a token of my friendship.
Yeah. Just think of it
as a little business loan.
-How much money is this?
-A hundred G.
l figure that's enough for you boys
to have a good time...
...and a special night with your girl.
Look, Mr. Tee....
Sweet Tee.
Right. Sorry about that. Sweet Tee.
Look, l really do appreciate it...
...but l can't take this.
Are you refusing my friendship?
No. No. Not at all.
Oh, go on, take that money
and enjoy yourself.
This here is Jimmy the Driver.
Now, he's gonna be your chaperone
for the weekend.
Now, just to make sure that there
are no problems, you understand?
Tee, can l talk to you for a minute, sir?
-Excuse me.
Why are you doing this to me, man?
You didn't tell me l had to babysit
Bb's Kids the whole damn weekend.
Laquita got her stitches out, come on.
You just make sure
nothing happens to this kid...
...or you'll be parking cars
back at the strip club, you get it?
That is, if it's okay with you guys.
-All right.
There you go.
l like that.
Just do it.
There go that boy.
Oh, okay, l see how it is, Kevin.
You come in with your crew,
you gonna jump me?
-What is he talking about?
l'm not afraid.
-l'm from a little town called Whup-Ass.
-Maybe you heard of my hometown.
l'm from the Wish-A-Nigga-Woulds.
Yeah. You ever been there?
-Weather is awesome.
-Hey. How are you?
-What's up, man?
-Everything good?
-We're gonna do a little shopping today.
-All right.
Let me see.
l'm gonna take everything on this wall.
Yeah, everything.
And everything on this one too.
A couple size 10s.
What, you 10 and a half?
-Ten and a half.
-And.... Oh, yeah.
-l'm taking them home with me too.
Oh, l'm dead serious.
Yeah, right, Kevin.
How you gonna afford that?
You rob a bank?
-Look, Doug, that's the boss.
You disrespect him, you disrespect me.
Now get us some shoes...
Make it rain!
-Let's go.
Let's do it. Shopping on me.
-All right, dog.
Hey, don't be a stranger.
Thanks, guys. Thank you very much.
Come on back anytime.
Let me up in this thing, man.
Hey, Nikki.
-That's what l'm talking about.
-Ha, ha.
Oh. Heh, heh. Come on in.
-Everything okay?
-You know it.
Well, how about you help me out
with this menu?
Because l don't understand nothing
that's on here.
Well, it's all pretty good.
Their chicken piccata is fantastic,
-Maybe you should try that.
-You ate here before?
LeBron brought me here a few times.
Le - LeBron James?
lt was months ago, Kevin.
Damn. You just be doing it big, huh?
What? What you gonna tell me next,
Jay-l brought you here too?
Please don't go there.
Jay and l don't speak anymore.
-Here. He can't pay for that.
-How you doing?
-l'm Benny. Nice to meet you. Pleasure.
Hey, hey, hey. Let me get some water.
That's good. Mm-hm.
You just stand here
till l tell you l'm thirsty.
Let's get some lemon for that.
Are you crazy?
l like crazy girls, but not like stalker.
l need a girl l can take to
church and strip clubs.
-Hand me that silverware.
-The silverware?
Nigga, are you serious?
-Hey, this is phat, baby.
We can't be doing this.
-We should go.
-You blowing up the spot.
Just take the shit
and put it in your purse.
Chicken. l'm just gonna try
the piccotto chicken
-l'm gonna have some of that. Um....
Good choice, though.
That's what Bill always gets.
Bill who? Clinton?
Heh, heh. No, Kevin. Cosby.
Thank you. Lemon in the water, please.
Oh, and l dropped my napkin.
Watch cartoons,
Saturday morning cartoons.
-Can l have some of this?
-Yeah, of course.
Seventy-five dollars for this? Wow.
What were you expecting,
some big old ghetto burger?
-Just try it, Kevin.
l just thought it'd be
a big piece of chicken.
See? Good, right?
lt is good. It ain't bad.
It's all right.
Well, if you think that's tender...
...warm and juicy....
Just relax and let me do all the work.
Oh, damn.
This condom here.
Put this on.
Get it out.
You just feisty.
Let me help you. Here we go.
Wait, wait, wait.
Let me put the condom on.
-Yeah, let me
-You don't need that, baby.
Wait, we can't - We can't
Look, it's just l don't think we should do it.
l'm not ready to be a father yet.
You say it like it's the worst thing
in the world.
What, you think you're too good
to give me a baby?
No, it's not that - Oh!
lt's just, we just young!
Look, what if you get pregnant
or something?
We should use it because
that way we won't have babies.
We don't need babies.
lt's just a lot. It's a lot.
Goddamn it, Kevin.
Soon as y'all get that little money...
...all l ever hear is,
''Condom, condom, condom.''
Every hoodrat in this project gets to be
a baby mama for some baller except me?
ls that why you called me up here?
So l can get you pregnant?
Sorry to bust your bubble, sweetie,
but a bitch gotta get paid.
And this - Over here, Kevin.
- right here, is my lottery ticket.
You can let yourself out.
Hey, youngster.
Come here for a minute.
l wanna talk to you about something.
-Well, can it wait?
Not if you care about that lottery ticket
that's in your wallet.
Might as well come all the way in.
You done come this far.
Don't you worry about that lotto ticket.
lf l wanted it...
...l'd have hit you
with a four-punch combination.
You'd have never seen it coming.
Come on in, man. Stop looking scared.
l won't bite you.
First l wanna see what you got.
What you got? Come on.
Why you fighting me?
-Let's go. What you got?
-Can you protect yourself at all times?
-At all times?
Well, do it!
Come on in, man.
l'm just playing with you. Damn.
Come on in, man.
Why you looking all scared? Huh?
lt's your ugly friend Benny the one
think l'm a serial killer. Right?
How you know about my ticket?
Oh, man, l hear everything
that go on around here.
lf l asleep on this couch or taking a dump,
then l don't hear too much.
But you don't go outside.
l don't need to go outside.
You see that vent right there?
With this vent l can hear everything
going on with y'all right here.
l listen for hours.
l just pull this right here.
- you had a helicopter,
where you gonna park that thing at?
Man, l'll park it on the roof.
Why is you all in my helicopter here?
-Y'all gonna be like my peasants around here.
You gonna go get my Now and Laters.
l'm the baller.
-You want some red Kool-Aid?
...why not go outside?
l don't need to go outside.
Go out for what?
Ain't nothing around here
but drug dealers shooting each other.
-Y'all can have it. Here you go.
What's up with the gloves?
You used to box or something?
''Used to''?
Still got a little something.
Man, you box anybody l know?
-You ever heard of Muhammad Ali?
-Have l?
Larry Holmes.
Earnie Shavers. Ken Norton.
Ronnie Lyle.
l even knocked out, uh
What's that boy's name? Leon Spinks.
l'm the one knocked them teeth out.
What, you think l'm lying?
Look, man, l was they sparring partner.
They used to give me $300 a round
to spar.
That was big money back then.
l never got my shot, you know?
l never got a real fight.
But hey, l'm here.
So why they call you Thump?
Is it because you hit hard?
They call me Thump
because l hit the canvas hard.
But l always got back up.
You wasn't that good, huh?
l didn't ever say l was.
You know? l just love boxing.
As a little kid, l just wanted to be a boxer,
so l gave it a shot.
Weren't you nervous
that you would fail?
Of course.
But that ain't why you don't try.
What if l was one of the greats? Hm?
What if it was all about me?
l wouldn't know if l didn't try.
l know l could've looked good
on that poster too.
Oh, man....
Look, man, l wish l could stay longer,
but l gotta get going, you know?
Hey, wait. Hey, hey.
Them is some interesting shoes
you got right there on your feet.
Man, what the hell are those?
l like them.
-Like them, huh?
Hey, look, when l first got a little money,
it wasn't 300 million...
...but l got a little jewelry,
you know what l mean?
l was sharp. l had my leather piece,
l had my Cadillac...
...l had some girls out front.
l had everything a man could want.
Yeah, everything.
Man. What happened to it?
l got robbed,
right out here on this stoop.
They shot me in my ass...
...ended my whole career just like that.
What can you do, man?
You step on a tent and it bent,
and that's the way it went.
lt's the neighborhood, man.
It's this neighborhood.
l just wish somebody...
...had the courage to come along
and make a difference.
l don't know, man.
l ain't gonna hold you, Kevin.
l just wanted some company, man.
That's all.
-All right, Kevin.
-Thanks, man. Thanks.
-See? Protect yourself at all times.
Okay, folks, now
sometimes we get articles come to the club...
...that are sometimes fun and extravagant.
Well, we have something
coming up next...
...that has to do with your health.
This is vey
Come by here, my Lord
Come by here
Come by here, my Lord
Come by here
Come by here, my Lord
Come by here
Oh, Lord, come by here
Good morning, brothers and sisters.
l know that you know that miracles
happen every day.
That's right.
And l pray that the heavenly Father
is listening to us right now.
He knows what you'll do...
...before you do it,
what you'd do before you did it...
...and what you'll do
when you leave here.
When you hear me say ''miracles''...
...l'm not talking about Smokey Robinson
and the four brothers out of Detroit!
That's right, l'm not talking about
those fellas.
l'm not talking about...
...the delicious spread you spread on
the bread called the Miracle Whip!
Go ahead, Reverend. Heh.
l, Reverend Taylor,
have had a vision.
What'd you see, brother?
-For many, many years.
And the vision has been for me
to have a brand-new church.
-So that l can come here on Sunday...
...and preach the word of God!
For instance, hit the lights.
Okay, here we go.
Let me show you all
what l'm talking about.
This is the church we are currently sitting in
right now, brothers and sisters. Look at it.
l had some Mexicans
working on that ''chimley.''
l got four of them at the Home Depot.
Jumped in the van
like they was gonna do it right.
They end up putting masking tape
all on top of the ''chimley.''
Help us, Lord.
Show them my next church.
Look at that! Oh, Lord.
This is the kind of church make you
wanna come and praise the Lord.
Make you wanna put something
in the plate.
And if we ain't got a plate, just put
what you gonna give me in my hand.
-This is my home.
Oh, have mercy.
Many of you brothers and sisters didn't
know that l was living so humble, did you?
l sleep up here.
ln this room right here.
Grandma, don't you see
what's going on?
This is my vision. Look at that.
T.D. Jakes. Benjamin and Long.
Everybody's living like this.
Praise the Lord. Thank you, Jesus.
Why come l can't have a Jacuzzi?
Why come l can't eat shrimps and steak?
Lord, why come l can't have that?
-Did he ask you? No.
-Where he gonna get the money?
-He's not asking.
-That's not right.
Those sisters who need help,
that want to pray privately with me....
-Tell it, pastor.
-My ex-wife.
Goat-smelling ass,
built like a sack of laundry.
Fake Louis Vuitton purse.
She done let them Chinese
trick her nine times.
-Oh, yes.
-This is the wife God want me to have.
Praise the Lord.
Does she have a twin sister? Ha.
Do you get the vision that l'm trying
to tell you, ladies and gentlemen?
God works in mysterious ways.
God might not be there when you want him,
but he's always there when you want him!
We got a miracle in the house today.
Kevin, please come up here.
Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Kevin.
Kevin, come on. Put your hands together.
-l don't wanna go up there.
-Go up there and talk to the preacher.
That's my grandbaby.
Yeah, baby.
Kevin! Kevin!
-Yo, he's coming.
-Who's coming?
-No, not Jesus!
Lorenzo, he's out of jail.
He was chasing me and he's coming.
What you want me to do?
Just stand right there.
-Hey. Thank you.
-You got a gun?
-Y'all ready for a miracle?
That's right.
Pastor is always talking about a miracle.
l wanna let y'all know the biggest sinner
of our time is coming to get saved.
Y'all give it up for Lorenzo.
Go, go!
Who let that nigga out of jail?
Get off me.
Next person that touch me
about to get stabbed...
...l swear before God!
No, no, no!
Look, man, l'm sorry, all right?
l didn't mean to set you up, l promise.
-You mean that Foot Locker thing?
No, no, no, l'm over that, man.
l'm over that.
-You and me, we got different business.
-l'm gonna need that lottery ticket now.
lf you don't back up off that boy
nice and slow...
...l'm gonna blow your head off quick.
You know what l think?
l think you a little bitch.
Ain't never shot nobody
in your whole life.
Pull a piece on me, you better use it!
What's happening?
-Excuse me.
Yo, come back here, man.
Right there, right there!
Come on, come on!
-Come on!
Get out my way!
Get out the way, get out the way.
You okay?
Move! Move, move, move!
-Excuse me.
Get him, get him!
Oh, shit.
Leave the little man alone!
l'll see you when l see you.
Look, l don't see Lorenzo and his boys,
so it look like you safe to go home now.
You really think we safe? Huh?
Kevin, look. All you gotta do is
get through the next day and a half...
-...and we good.
-And then what?
Then you get your money.
ls this what having money feels like?
Everybody asking me for something?
People l ain't talked to in years
calling my phone?
l don't want it, man.
l heard this quote once:
''Money don't change you,
it changes the people around you.''
You understand that?
Come on, Kev. l heard this quote too.
We quoting now? We quoting now?
l got this quote:
''People gonna be people.
They gonna lie,
they gonna cheat and they gonna steal.
As long as you get yours,
you keep it moving.''
-So let's go home.
-lt's not that easy, Benny. It's not.
-Kev, how about this?
Let me hold onto it for you.
Let you hold onto what?
The ticket.
That case, if Lorenzo catches you,
you won't get jacked.
You too?
After what l just said to you?
And you hit me with this bullshit?
-lt ain't like that.
-What you mean, ''lt ain't like that''?
-lt is like that. It is!
-lt ain't like that.
-You losing it, man.
-You got the wrong one.
-You serious?
-Dead-ass serious.
Come on, Kev.
-l been your best friend since fifth grade.
-Act like it.
-Fifth grade!
-Act like it!
Ain't no way l'll let this money
compromise our friendship.
You can have it.
You can have this shit, Kev.
You can have the whole thing.
l don't want it!
-l don't want none of this!
-What you got?
l'm up here losing my damn mind,
running up and down the streets for us!
-Ain't no ''us'' shit! Ain't no us, nigga!
-lt is us, Kev! It is us!
-lt's everybody!
-What you talking about?
You ain't in my shoes,
you don't know.
-Look at this, look at us.
l'm not looking.
Look at our circumstances, man.
Look where we from!
l'm tired of this, man.
l'm sick of worrying about WIC cards!
l'm sick of worrying
about the government
l can't eat!
l'm broke, nigga! l'm broke!
And you got the power
to change that, Kev.
Nobody else. You.
Kevin, if l had the money...
...not only would l give back...
...l would change lives.
The sad thing is, you known me
for this long and you still don't get it.
Bust a move, homey.
You want me to be honest?
That's why l'm here, right?
Look, you know l can't even stand
Benny half the time...
...but he is not a thief, and you know it.
lf anything, that boy is too loyal to you.
You probably hurt his feelings,
and l personally think you acted like an ass.
-And you need to tell him you're sorry.
That's the truth.
- Central Bank on Wednesday....
What? You said you wanted me
to be honest, right?
-What's up?
lf you won the lottery,
what would you do?
l mean, you know...
...take care of my family, travel...
...finish school, all that good stuff.
But if l had your kind of money,
l'd give back.
Give people something to live for
instead of just living, you know?
Like, look at how some of these rappers
always talk about, ''Shout out to my 'hood.''
But what are they giving back
other than just shoutouts?
Thank you.
lt's cool, it's just a grilled cheese.
No, no. Not for the sandwich.
Just thanks for being there for me.
l mean that.
lt's cool.
l got you.
l appreciate it.
-But now l need you to tell me something.
-What's up?
What happened on your little date
with Nikki Swayze?
Say ''l told you so.''
All she wanted to be was my baby mama.
Wow, what?
Nikki, the no-class, gold-digging bitch.
l'm shocked.
l mean, but at least
you got what you wanted:
To tell all your boys you hit that.
Because l didn't.
God on my mama,
l ain't touched that girl.
l'm kind of glad l didn't too.
What do l look like?
Swapping swords
with half of the Fortune 500.
l'm straight.
And besides...
...that's not the kind of girl
l need anyway.
Oh, really? Who is the kind
of girl you need, then?
Can l be honest?
Ain't that why you came here?
The kind of girl l need is you.
Goodbye, Kevin. Goodbye.
What, you gonna kick me out?
You know what? l'm not interested
in being your second choice.
How long have we known each other?
Why did it take you so long
to tell me this?
Oh. After you and Nikki,
all of a sudden you wanna be with me?
Why'd it take you so long?
l'm not that girl, okay?
Don't get it
- twisted.
-Hold on, hold on.
-Wait, hold on.
Tst. Damn, girl, how many dudes
you done had up in your bed?
What? Don't try to play me.
lf you think we're doing this
without a condom, you're tripping.
-Oh, shit, it's my mama!
-Your mama?
You gotta go.
-Damn, your mama?
Come on.
-You gotta - Get out! No!
-What? Let me go.
-Out where?
-Get out.
Out the window?
-Sorry. Yes.
-Are you okay?
-l'm fine.
Please be careful. Okay.
-l love you.
l love you too.
Now go. Get down.
Where am l?
Now, relax now, son, relax.
Don't worry about nothing,
you just got knocked the fuck out.
Put these black-eyed peas on your jaw.
Take down the swelling.
What you talking about?
Man, are you crazy?
Ain't nobody knock me out.
Hold on.
Wait a minute.
Where's my ticket?
l don't know. They probably stole it.
That's why you was knocked out.
Yeah, that about sums it up.
Wait a minute.
How do l know you didn't knock me out
yourself and stole my ticket?
The fact of the matter is Lorenzo
and his boys was out there walking.
l heard them talking and laughing.
l get up,
l look and see you stretched out.
Now, it wasn't easy...
...but l pick you up and l tote you in here
and put you on that couch.
And you talk to me like that?
l ain't been out this apartment
in 22 years and l did it for you.
You did that?
What l wanna know is,
did you sign the back of the ticket?
Why would l sign the ticket?
lf you didn't sign the back of the ticket,
it's not valid.
-The cops is not gonna believe you.
-No, no.
Man, bump that!
Look, he stole my ticket.
l should be able to go right back to him
and get it back, straight up!
Okay, tiger. Okay.
But look, Lorenzo's a premature
crack-baby felon, okay?
You gotta be careful.
What other choice do l have?
Well, l been thinking.
The same thing got you into this mess...
-...might just get you out.
-Man, l'm not trying to hear that.
-Wait, wait, wait
-Where you going?
-l'm out, man.
Hold up.
You took my sneakers?
l was thinking about it.
But they wasn't on your feet
when l dragged you in here.
You wouldn't have did nothing.
Protect yourself at all times.
Protect yourself at all times.
Don't do this with this boy.
l'm too old for this.
Whoo! Thank you, Jesus!
Thank you, Jesus!
Thank you, Jesus! Oh.
Where the hell you been, boy?
l been worried sick about you.
Nobody know where you is, you didn't call.
What happened?
And where are your shoes?
-l got robbed!
Lorenzo took everything, all right?
Look, he took my ticket,
he took my shoes....
Oh. No, l'm calling the police.
Chill out. Don't do that.
What they gonna do?
l didn't sign the back of the ticket.
Boy, l told you. You'd given me that ticket,
l'd put it here, wouldn't nobody get to it.
Look, l got 24 hours to go claim
what's mine, all right?
And that's what l'm about to go do.
That's how it is.
Oh, hell, no. l'm calling somebody.
Watch it. Watch.
-Come on, come on. Bet back, bet back.
-What up, B?
Chilling with my real friends.
What's up with you?
That ain't no dirty dice.
That's my money on the ground, fool.
Let me holler at you real quick, man.
Your drawers is dirty, not my dice.
Come on, man.
What's up, Kev?
Look, man.
l'm sorry about what happened
on the roof the other day.
l mean that, man.
Look, Kev, l know my approach to life
might be a little off...
...but just know my intentions are good.
-We boys?
-We boys.
All day.
Kevin, you got that Bobby Brown look
in your eyes, man. What you doing?
Where the hell you been, man?
You harder to find than a job.
Man, like you would know.
You ain't had a job since Thriller.
-Where Lorenzo at?
Lorenzo Mack?
l saw him yesterday when he was
racing you up and down the street.
Man, listen. When y'all see Lorenzo,
Iet him know l'm looking for his ass.
-Tell him that.
Don't say nothing.
-Wait - Is he looking for?
-He wants to find Lorenzo?
You seen Lorenzo?
Calm down.
-Shut up, man.
-Little girl, you seen Lorenzo?
My friend's crazy.
-This is crazy.
He's not out here.
-Kev, look, he's bigger than you.
-Y'all seen Lorenzo?
-Don't mind him.
Hey, where you at?
Man, bring your ass outside!
Talking all that shit! Where you at now?
-Kevin, just calm down.
-Shut up!
Right there.
-Don't get your ass kicked.
l got your ass now!
-Boy, what the hell's wrong with you?
-All right.
You think because you got money,
you can just knock people down? Huh?
You want ice cream?
Get in line like everybody else.
-l don't want no damn ice cream!
It's good. Look, good as new.
-What's wrong with you? Get off me!
Just the man l wanted to see.
Kevin, take a ride with me.
Few things l wanna talk over.
-lt's all right if l don't?
-No, not really.
Get in the car.
-Okay, Kevin, l'm coming with you.
-Come on.
Stay right there.
First of all, let me apologize for that
incident outside the church the other day.
l mean, that was entirely my fault.
l should've never let you out of my sight.
From now on...
...wherever you go...
...l go.
Speaking of the church... Jimmy the Driver gonna be all right?
Is he gonna pull through?
-He'll live.
He won't be on solid food for a while...
...and he probably will never
father children...
...but, hey, what can you do?
Ahem. Sweet Tee... would you feel
if somebody owed you money
Not me.
- and they couldn't pay you back?
Off the top of my head?
l'd probably, uh...
...saw his legs off at the kneecaps...
...and then grind them
into hamburger meat.
And then l'd feed them to
my two 100-pound bullmastiffs.
Then l would force that guy
to watch them eat it.
That's pretty gnarly shit, ain't it?
Yeah, that's dastardly, l know it.
l saw that in the Philippines,
that's what gave me the idea.
Yeah, you ain't never heard a man scream
until you've heard him scream like that.
You've never heard a man throw up
the way l'm gonna throw up right now.
Not in my Bentley.
-Damn it, get out!
-All right.
Close my door.
Try to feel better.
l'll be around keeping my eye on you.
And remember...
...wherever you go, l go.
Let's go.
-He's gonna kill me.
-He said that?
No, not exactly.
He said he was gonna cut my legs off...
...then feed them to the dogs.
Don't pump it up. He said
he'd cut you off at the kneecaps.
Kevin, you have to give back
all his money.
lt ain't that simple.
l spent it.
How did you spend $100,000
in one day?
lt's not hard as you might think.
l got some earrings.
You're just gonna have to return
all that stuff you bought.
The same way you got into this mess... the same way you're gonna
have to get yourself out of it.
Nothing. It's just that that's
the same thing Mr. Washington told me.
-Mr. Washington, the serial killer?
Stop talking to him.
We're already in enough trouble.
Stop, all right?
Because he's not a serial killer.
Wait a minute.
lt was Semaj.
-lt was Semaj!
What about Semaj?
No. That's why l'm in
this mess right now.
Because of him.
He told everybody about my ticket.
l'm not following.
What does Semaj have to do with it?
Get up! We gotta leave, now.
Yo, man, if you're trying to do
what l think you gonna do... must be out your damn mind.
So if the one he stole was fake...
...what was your whole nervous
breakdown about earlier today?
Running all over town,
cursing Lorenzo's name...
...knocking folks over...
...and ruining ice cream cones?
Had to make it look real, right?
Even had you fooled.
Slow down and tell me that
one more time.
He did what now?
Yeah, baby. Yeah, baby.
Man, that is the aroma of the beef.
Y'all just hating.
Hell, no. l'm going vegetarian.
Did you make the potato salad too?
Kevin, you want something to drink?
No, l'm all right. l'm cool.
Hey, this my mama recipe.
Y'all better back off.
You think you slick?
You little bitch.
Think you gonna get over on me?
Oh, man. Oh, come on, Lorenzo.
You see how big this nigga look
right now?
lt's a family barbecue.
Grab a plate, get something to eat, all right?
We got potato salad, get you a piece
of chicken. Chill out, you know
Oh, it's that type of party? Okay.
It's that type of party.
Come on, Kev, throw one on him.
What's up?
First, l'm about to tell you
what's gonna go down.
First, l'm gonna beat your ass
till l get tired.
And l ain't never gonna get tired.
Then l'm gonna take that ticket,
the real ticket, and walk up out of here.
Look, l'm gonna tell you like this, man.
You want my ticket?
You gonna have to take my ticket, dog.
Straight up.
Be a man. That's right. That's right, Kev.
You gonna have to back up, Lorenzo.
lt ain't going down like that today.
You gonna have to back up, man,
before l bust a cap in your ass, man.
Shoot me, ''man.''
Get over here.
Cognac, nigga?
Not the homeboy.
Kev, l'm gonna let you handle that.
Look out.
Oh, what now?
You know who l am?
-He don't know.
-Yeah, l know who you are.
Then you must know l don't play.
Now, this young man...
...happens to be my business partner
and a close personal friend of mine.
l think he's about tired of you
harassing him.
And frankly, so am l.
Look, l ain't got no beef with you.
This is between me and him.
But you do need to know...
...that he's gonna get
his ass whupped today.
And l'm gonna leave with that ticket.
Now, you see, that's the problem
with young folk today.
Absolutely no courtesy.
No respect!
Damn! Took all day
to make that potato salad!
Now, y'all can keep on partying
or go home.
There ain't gonna be no fight here today.
That's it.
Look at this punk ass.
And y'all said he was supposed to be
some kind of a tough guy.
You know what l'd do
with a bitch like you in my ''cellie''?
Make you snuggle up with me at night.
And l squeeze your balls.
l squeeze.
And l squeeze!
Oh, man!
Oh, hell, no. This nigga's some kind
of goddamn superthug.
-Tee! Get up, Tee.
Go home, Lorenzo!
Now, where were we?
Oh, snap.
Come on, Kev.
Yeah, man, hit him back!
My grandmama hit harder than you.
Get back.
-That's right, kid. Whup his ass.
-That's right.
Come on, man. Come on.
Jesus, l can't
Stay down!
Just stay down.
l gotta give it to you.
You got a lot of heart.
But heart only gets you so far, son.
Don't give it to him, Kevin.
What say we do this old school?
Pick a number between one and 10.
All right. That's how many seconds you got
to hand it over before l start blasting.
-Come on.
-Counting down.
Three. Two.
All right.
Lorenzo, you should be ashamed!
-l was hoping l'd get to use this.
You know what?
l'm gonna hold onto both of these.
Just in case... got a little funny with the tickets.
Nice doing business with you.
Oh, before l forget....
Bitches didn't fit anyway.
Say, young blood.
You like that, huh?
That's good work.
Somebody read him a bedtime story.
Mr. Washington?
You're the man, Mr. Washington.
Yeah, Mr. Washington!
He's a bad mother - Shut your mouth.
Didn't l tell you?
l hear everything. Everything.
Come on, out of here, Bobby Brown.
l know you got it.
Now, lookie here, boy.
Keep ahold of these things.
You put them in a safe place. You hear?
-All right?
-All right.
Safe place.
There's a lot of crazies around here.
All right.
Still got it.
You let them know l still got it, right?
Let them know.
Any of you young punks
want your ass whupped, step on in.
-They don't want none.
-No, they don't want none.
Let them know l still got it.
Damn. Mr. Washington's pretty cool
for a serial killer.
Baby. Kevin.
-Unh. Stacie.
-Are you okay?
-Please sign the ticket.
Well, here it go.
Yes, you heard right.
He got the numbers from
a fortune cookie at the Hunan Grill.
So a month after graduating
high school...
...Kevin Carson is the youngest winner
in the Mondo Millions lottery.
Asked what he'd do with the money...
...he said he'd start
his own line of sneakers...
...and ''Give a little something
to the Fillmore.''
People not from here
may not understand.
This is a community.
This is our community.
As long as we stay together... matter how many times
life knocks us down, we can't lose.
See, that's why l wanna
make this park safe for all kids.
And to make sure
that it stays that way...
...l would like to introduce
the head of security:
Mr. Jerome ''Thump'' Washington.
Please, everybody.
Hey, look, any of you young punks
wanna get knocked out, just let me know.
Oh, look. You wanna do the honors?
-Don't mind if l do.
-All right. Here we go.
There it is.
All right, all right.
Now, as you guys already know,
this is just the beginning.
Myself... CEO... future attorney...
...we wanna take this to the next level.
That's right. That's why we started
the Carson Foundation...
...which helps fund our own businesses,
grant scholarships, and better yet... change people's lives.
-And on another note
Thank you.
l'm sorry, but we gotta cut out early.
l gotta get to work so we have to go.
Come on, Kev.
Let me holler at my grandma.
Grandma, you're not coming?
Oh, child, please.
After l just got my hair done?
lt's okay, we can get it done.
l don't see nothing in the Bible
about no helicopter.
So, wait, no, no, no. Listen.
You duck your head down.
That thing got them blades on it!
l know about it.
We really have to go.
-Go. Take care of your business.
-Love you.
Thank you. Hair looks amazing.
Oh, hush up, boy. Handle your business.
-Thanks, everybody. Thank you!
-See you!
Come on, Kev.
Kev, don't ever change, baby.
You good. That's right.
Hey, Mr. Washington.
Hey there, Miss Carson. How you doing?
How you doing?
Time is money.
Let's fly, baby, fly.
Come on, let's go, let's go.
It's got everything.
l'm gonna see y'all Monday at work.
We don't get to ride?
-We love you.
It was my idea.
-Y'all hold it down.
It was my idea.
All right, kid. Do your thing, man.
-That's what it is.
We got you. We got you.
Lord Almighty, them helicopter lights
go off and on like that.
That's my good wig, man.
Li'l Kim likes this right here, baby.