Marmaduke (2022) Movie Script

[funk music playing]
-Yeah, whoa
La, la,Marmaduke
[narrator] Once upon a time,
there lived a very large
and very sad doggy.
His family got mad at him
just for being himself.
They locked him away in a high tower
just so he couldn't join
Billy's birthday party.
No one said it was easy being a dog.
Big style, huge smile
You can't ban me from Billy's party.
It won't be a party without me.
You put yourself there.
-[bee buzzing]
-You play, you pay.
[man] Gather round,
boys and girls, and watch this!
[King Tut] Hmm.
[clown chuckles]
[boy cheers]
Here's your birthday doggy.
-[Billy] Aw! Gee,thanks.
-[boy] Where's Marmaduke?
[Billy] Uh, he's up in my room
being punished.
[camera clicking]
I'm having so much fun
watching your brother's lame party.
-I know, right?
[Billy] Let's see how high we can jump.
[boys laughing]
Watch this! [grunts]
-[boys scream]
Oh, Phil! Phil!
Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil!
You know I can say your name
76,345 times in a row.
Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil!
[Marmaduke barking]
-You're not going anywhere, Marmaduke.
-[barking continues]
Dad, why can't Marmaduke join the party?
Billy, he's got to stay up there
until he learns his lesson.
-Aw! It's not fair.
-[Phil groans]
Phil, don't you think
you're being too hard on poor Marmaduke?
He's gone too far, Dottie.
Maybe we need to enroll Marmaduke
in obedience school.
This is so unfair.
Phil can't be mad at me for being a dog.
All dogs like to chase cats.
[Phil] Marmaduke!
[Marmaduke] No dog
can resist a fresh bone.
-[Phil grunts]
[yelps, grunts]
Hey, you lousy mutt!
[Marmaduke] One man's trash
is another dog's treasure.
-[Phil] Marmaduke!
[Marmaduke] It's Phil's favorite chair,
but he knows we like to wrestle over it.
[Phil growls]
-[boxing bell dings]
-[strained] Marmaduke!
[Marmaduke] He's cooking my favorite.
[panting, chuckling]
[Marmaduke] Oh! I can't take this.
Fine. You want to play hardball?
You got it, pal.
-[marching band music playing]
-I will march in protest!
-I'll call my senator!
-[drum thumping]
I want justice, and I want it now!
-I won't rest for one second!
-[music stops]
Oh, look. A bed.
[thuds loudly]
[bee buzzing]
[licks lips]
[bell ringing]
Here you go, sir.
Perfect temperature.
Just the way you like it.
-[record scratches]
-Ah! Get away from me!
[grunts, groans]
[warbles, huffs angrily]
-[panicked grunting]
Ah! [spits]
[gags, coughs]
[groaning dizzily]
Why, you dirty little--
[bee giggling]
[giggling continues]
Oh, you picked the wrong day,
you buzzy little--
-[glass shatters]
[yelling in slow motion]
Oh, look. The life of the party.
[yelling in slow motion continues]
[boy] Whoa!
[Barbara gasps]
This is awesome!
[balloon inflates, pops]
[screaming nervously]
-[woman gasps]
-[all scream]
-[tires screech]
-[car horn beeps]
-I hope my makeup doesn't run!
-[kids scream]
Who wants a hot
Diggity dang that dog!
[burbling] Marmaduke!
This is the best party ever!
-[Phil growls]
[clown crying]
[music fades]
We have to do something about Marmaduke.
Okay. I admit it.
He's a handful.
Maybe obedience school
isn't such a bad idea.
[Barbara] Mom! Dad!
Susies video of Marmaduke has gone viral!
There's over a million hits!
[Marmaduke yelling on phone]
-[water splashes]
-[people scream]
Oh my!
Definitely time to find
that obedience school.
[Marmaduke yelling]
-[water splashes]
-[people scream]
-[water splashes]
-[people scream]
This "Pool Flop Fail" video
is unbelievable!
That furry rebel without a clue
is totally out of control.
A dog like this is impossible to train,
even for the world's greatest dog trainer
-Guy Hilton.
Guy won the last six
World Dog Championships in a row.
-[chuckles] Hmm?
-But will not compete again
until he finds a worthy challenge.
Well, Guy, here it is.
Train an impossible dog.
[music playing on TV]
Impossible to train?
[TV clicks off]
Impossible is my middle name.
I will show the world
that I can train any dog.
[upbeat music playing]
Look at this.
Come on.
[Billy] Ladies and gentlemen,
step right up to see
the Eighth Wonder of the World!
-[Marmaduke] Cheese.
[teenage boy] Oh my God. It's really him!
-[Marmaduke] Cheese!
Now, remember, this is a celebrity dog.
So take your pictures,
only pet him once, and--
[Marmaduke] Cheese.
-[Billy] Hey! Keep it moving!
-Hmm? Hmm.
[blows raspberry]
I don't want you drawing attention
to that embarrassing doggy flop video.
Dad, everyone loves it.
I can't let my son charge kids
from the neighborhood to meet our dog.
What kinda father would that make me?
You can have 10% of all profits.
Make it 20.
-[chuckles, grunting]
[kids chattering]
All right, you guys!
Marmaduke has a conference call
with a big Hollywood producer coming up.
So keep it moving! Next!
[Marmaduke] I need hair
and makeup over here.
[boy] Anybody have change for a 20?
[Guy] Oh, I want that doggy
Yes, right now
I dont want a cat that goes meow
I dont want a bird or a fat old cow
I want that dog
I want that doggy now
Cause Ill be famous
Oh wow
-[tires screeching]
- I want that dog somehow
Ill get him right now
[chuckles] Bowwow
So of all the dogs in the world,
you wanna train Marmaduke
to become the next World Champion?
After I won
last year's World Championship,
I said I wouldn't train another dog
until I found a worthy challenge.
And then
I saw this.
Do you really think he's got the pedigree
and winning form of a world champion?
[snoring] Bacon.
Not at all.
[lips smacking, stomach gurgles]
-[sniffing] Hmm?
-[Guy] He's a mess.
-[Phil] So you want to train Marmaduke
because he's a complete mess?
[Guy] Precisely.
He's the challenge
that I've been looking for.
[chomps] Huh?
-[Guy chuckles]
-[sighs, licks lips]
I have black belts
-in multiple disciplines.
I have a PhD in animal training technology
and hold 33 patents.
I am also the only person
to ever win the World Dog Championship
six times in a row.
I can turn your dog into a champion.
[pants, slurps]
What? Huh?
[whimpers, stomach gurgles]
It would be nice for Marmaduke
to learn how to obey the rules, but
[sighs] this sounds a little extreme.
The winning dog receives the title
of World Champion,
but, more importantly,
you'll earn the respect
-of the entire dog-loving world.
the winner receives one million dollars.
[cash register dings]
-We're in!
-We'll think about it.
Every dog just needs the proper training
to bring out their inner champion.
Okay, but I don't want my baby to suffer.
He's quite sensitive.
There's a champion inside Marmaduke.
It's just covered up in
poodles. [smacks lips]
We have a deal.
[Guy] Training starts tomorrow.
It's a dog-eat-dog world, Guy Hilton.
And you are about to show the world
just how hungry you are.
-[tires screeching]
-[Guy laughing manically]
-[spurs clinking]
-[Western music playing]
Sure could use my trusty steed
to track down Black Bart.
And Black Bart's getting away!
[King Tut] Here we go again.
The good, the bad, and the clueless.
Yeah! Get 'em! Get 'em!
-Woo-hoo! Yeehaw!
-Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Yeehaw!
[struggles, yelps]
[Marmaduke] Let's get that varmint!
[Billy] Yeah! Let's get him!
-Woo-hoo! Oh!
-[horse whinnies]
-[Billy laughing] Yeehaw!
-[Marmaduke] Oh, sorry, table.
-[King Tut] Oh!
-Yippee! Get him! Get him!
-Sorry, chair.
Aah! [gasps]
-[Marmaduke] Move it or lose it, cowboy!
-[horse neighs]
Guy Hilton is our only hope. [sighs]
[Marmaduke] Hey,
that doormat looks like Phil.
[tranquil music playing]
Hmm. You are no longer Marmaduke.
You are simply dog.
Uh! Whoa! Hey, man! That's my tag!
You will stop all bad habits.
[groans] This is messed up.
Its time you forget
everything you've ever known.
Okay, crazy man.
[dramatic music plays]
You must earn
the right to get your name back.
To become a champion,
you must become strong enough
to do the impossible!
Uh, all right. That's it. I've had enough.
I'm outa here.
There's a stack of French toast with
Billy's name on it that I'm about to--
-[Guy grunts]
-[Marmaduke] Whoa!
Okay, that was cool.
You will leave when I tell you.
If you don't get out of my way,
I'm gonna have to unleash
-[thunder rumbles]
-[lightning crackles]
-[wind blusters]
-And Puddin'.
-[paw warbles]
Puddin's, uh, not much of a fighter.
As you wish.
[tense music playing]
[low growling]
You might wanna close your eyes,Puddin'.
[high-pitched] Huh?
[exclaims nervously]
[groaning in slow motion]
[exclaiming in slow motion]
Yech. Oh! That's so vile.
[grunts] You can't push me around, jerk!
Hmm. Hmm. Hmm.
Hmm. Hmm. Hmm.Ol!
[smacking, grunting]
[groans, screams]
[screaming continues]
ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow
This ain't over.
As you insist.
-Huh? [grunting]
-Wh Whoa!
What was that?
You must be prepared
for any and all situations.
Like the kick
[whispering] that isn't there.
Whoa! "The kick that isn't there."
That's enough for today.
The real work begins tomorrow.
Wait! We just started training.
You have to show me that trick.
[grunts, yelps]
-[Western music playing]
[Billy] There's my trusty steed.
I heard Black Bart's been rustlin'
around these parts.
[groans] Training is so tiring.
[exhales, yawns]
[gasps, whimpers]
You know I can't say no
when you do that face.
[in Southern accent] Hop on, partner.
-Yeehaw! Get 'em! Get 'em!
-[grunts] Boy howdy!
-[Marmaduke] Huh?
-Dad! What are you doing?
Marmaduke doesn't have time
to play cowboy. He's in training.
But I hardly even saw him today.
That's because he's working very hard
to get ready for the dog show.
Who cares about some stupid dog show?
[Phil] Hmm.
Billy will be fine. Come on, boy.
It's all yours.
Oh. Okay, this is where we both jump
for the couch and have that big fight
that ends in manly bear hugs.
Get some rest. Tomorrow's a big day.
You're just gonna let me have it.
[melancholy music playing]
[sniffing] Mmm, mmm! Mmm. Mmm.
[pants, chomps]
[electricity buzzes]
[screaming, grunting]
-[glass shatters]
[sentimental music playing]
[Marmaduke whines softly]
[Marmaduke snoring]
[Marmaduke] Man, what do you have
against sleep?
[Guy straining]
[Marmaduke] I need my beauty sleep!
[Guy grunting]
With the help
of my newest robotech training system,
I will turn you into a champion.
You will learn the proper way
to stand and walk
and learn to control yourimpulse to eat.
Is it already lunchtime?
[Guy] And you will train
on different obstacles
until you have the speed
and agility of a champion.
What about the kick?
Let's begin.
Follow the pose.
[Guy] You must control
your impulse to eat.
[Marmaduke] Hmm?
[licks lips]
-[metal clangs, warbles]
-[shouts, grunts]
[Guy] Through the poles.
I'm too cute to die!
[grunts, groans]
Ahh! Ugh! Ahh!
[Marmaduke grunts] There's no reason
to start so early.
[Guy and Marmaduke grunt]
-[Marmaduke] The sun isn't even up.
-[Guy straining]
[Marmaduke] Come on!
Jump through the rings!
[Marmaduke] This is gonna hurt!
Whoa! [grunts]
-[metal clangs]
[grunts] Ooh! Ow! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
[grunts, thuds]
Follow my movements.
Kick time, all right.
[chuckles mischievously]
[grunts, groans]
[intense music playing]
-[gasps softly]
-[Guy] Go!
[Marmaduke] Oh, why am I doing this?
I'm gonna get chopped in half!
[screams, groans]
-[accordion squeaking]
[thudding continues]
[screaming in slow motion]
-[alarm clock beeping]
I I'm alive.
I'm alive!
[beeping stops]
[dramatic music playing]
[metal clangs, warbles]
[beeps, stops]
[dramatic music continues]
-[Guy yelps]
-Let's do this, Guy.
[oven dings]
[Guy] Go!
-Let's see how well you play with fire.
[grunts] Nailed it!
[record scratches]
We did it! We did it!
[laughs gleefully] We did it!
Oh, we did it!
[giggles] Ooh! Yes!
[screams, blowing]
You are no longer dog.
You are Marmaduke.
And you're no longer guy.
You're Guy, you know?
With, like, a capital G.
[hesitates] I love you, man.
[Guy] Aw.
Tomorrow, you enter
your first competition.
[upbeat music playing]
[Barbara] Why is Dad
out shopping for a new car?
Because he thinks
Marmaduke is gonna make us rich.
Billy, stop saying true things
about your father.
Why? All he cares about
is the prize money.
Yeah, what a jerk.
Mom, if Marmaduke wins, can I get a pony?
We'll see, honey. [chuckles]
[announcer] Welcome to
the County Dog Show!
And now, I'd like to introduce
Henri and Philippe!
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the dog you've all been waiting for.
-It is Zeus!
-[audience cheering]
[audience gasps]
[Billy] Ahh!
Come on, people. Don't be shy.
Come on up and take a close look
at the future World Champion.
He shimmers like gold!
Look how beautiful Shimmer Shampoo
makes Zeus's hair, no?
That is the best-looking dog
I've ever seen!
That's just the lights from the-- Oh! Ah!
Okay, that's the fur.
That is the fur.
Aw. Looks aren't everything.
Aw, thanks, buddy.
[Barbara] Hey, Billy! Come here!
Wait, what's that supposed to mean?
And don't forget to take advantage of
our two-for-one offer for Shimmer Shampoo.
Guaranteed to turn your dog into a dream
-[Philippe chuckles]
-like the Zeus.
-No wonder he's so shiny.
-Billy, look.
[Marmaduke] He uses
name-brand shampoo. I use soap.
Dish soap.
Mom, can I use Shimmer Shampoo?
Don't be silly.
You're not using dog shampoo. [chuckles]
-[cash register dings]
It's too expensive.
Zeus is so, so special. [giggles]
[sarcastically] So, so special. Right.
Yes. Please. Okay.
Come out to the big show
and see the next World Dog Champion!
[Henri and Philippe] Zeus!
[cheering continues]
And don't forget to take advantage of our
two-for-one offer for the Shimmer Shampoo!
Handmade by me and my brother.
Oh! Zeus.
I'm so happy to be-- [grunts]
Come to buy some shampoo, fleabag?
Or did you just want to see
what a champion looks like up close?
You know what?
I'm gonna be a champion too.
Okay. First of all, ah, I'm going to be
the next World Champion.
Second of all,
the only thing you're going to win is
total humiliation for you and your family.
-[gasps, shouts]
-[laughs] Psych.
[Guy chuckles]
Congratulations, Marmaduke.
You're all signed up
for your first dog show.
Who's this pretty princess?
[scoffs] See ya later, loser.
Ugh. Ooh.
Oh, I hope this disguise works
and no one recognizes me.
Come on, we have to get ready
for the competition.
[upbeat music playing]
Today, you'll show them all
that you are a champion.
[Marmaduke] Wow.
-Hi, pal.
So many new friends to talk to.
Ah. Here we are.
This is all for me?
You belong here.
-You have to believe you're a winner.
-Huh? [grunts]
So start acting like one.
[muffled] Okey dokey.
-Stay put while I find out when we're up.
Believe you're a winner.
Got it. No problem.
I'm a winner. I'm a winner. I'm a winner.
-[dog gasps] Zeus.
-[triumphant music playing]
-[woman squeals] Zeus!
Oh no. Zeus!
Okay, okay. Act cool.
Just ignore him, and he won't bother you.
Oh, Zeus. Zeus!
-It was so great to meet you earlier.
-[Zeus chuckles]
Hey, buddy. I just wanted to apologize
for how I acted earlier.
Whatever, Zeus.
But did did did you just apologize?
Yeah, man.
I spent the whole day on that lousy stage
taking pictures and
-I just lost it.
-[woman] Oh! Oh no!
Us show dogs have to
stick together, bro-bro.
[woman] No, boy! Oh, stop!
[hesitantly] Okay, bro-bro.
I can tell I need to earn your trust.
Let me show you something.
Now, there's a well-known secret
about every single dog show.
Follow me.
Nobody comes here for
stupid little trophies or fancy ribbons.
-We come here for
the food!
[Marmaduke] It's it's a
I don't I can't
I I want I
I need
There's there's so much food!
[Zeus] You okay, buddy?
Yeah, yeah. I'm okay. I'm okay.
Just just gimme a sec, all right?
It's so beautiful.
Go on. Dive in.
But we're not supposed to eat a large meal
before a competition.
A large meal before a competition
is exactly what you need.
We don't have much time, so dig in.
[chewing] Mmm. Mmm.
Okay, I'm in.
But just a tiny taste. [exhales]
I gotta rush and get highlight touch-ups.
I'll see you in five.
-See ya.
-[saliva dripping]
[chuckles menacingly]
[crowd cheering]
[announcer] All contestants
please report to the main stage.
The show is finally starting!
[laughs gleefully]
-Where the
-is Marmaduke?
[Marmaduke, dazedly] So fat.
So happy.
[groans, belches]
[announcer] All contestants
please report to the main stage.
-[stomach gurgles]
-[groaning continues]
[straining, groaning]
-Whoa! [grunts]
-[dishes clattering]
Okay, gotta get up.
-[sighs, groans]
-[stomach sloshes]
Did my legs shrink?
[announcer] The dog show competition
is starting.
All contestants must get ready.
[groaning] I can't believe
I ate the whole thing.
-[legs warbling]
[inhales sharply]
[exhales] Okay.
[crowd cheering]
[announcer] Bring out the dogs!
Yay! Here they come!
[Guy] Ugh.
Where is that [sighs]
Oh! Where have you been?
Don't worry.
I was just checking my blood sugar.
What is that smell?!
[clears throat]
Now, remember, float around the perimeter.
[crowd cheering]
[Billy] Hey! There's Marmaduke!
[Marmaduke] Floating. Just keep floating.
[woman] Go! Go! Yes!
[cheering continues]
[Marmaduke] See? We're good.
Easy peasy, lemon--
-[stomach gurgles]
-[legs quaver]
-What are you doing?
[groaning] I gotta go!
That's it. I'm never smelling
a dog's rear end again.
What happened to you?
Did you swallow the Goodyear Blimp?
What's going on?!
He looks like me after Taco Tuesday.
Get up.
I can't. Trust me.
What's wrong with Marmaduke?
[straining] Get up.
[Zeus] How was your snack?
-You look a bit bloated. [chuckles]
-[grunting nervously]
I I'm fine, thank you. I I just have to
I need to-- Oh!
-Gotta go!
[panting frantically]
[labored breathing]
[panting] It's too far.
I'm not gonna make it.
Oh? Oh!
-Ah. I can do it. I can do it.
-[tires screeching]
Someone control that dog.
[screaming continues]
[stomach gurgling]
-[man] What is that?
-[kid] Oh my God!
-[girl] What's happening?
-[Henri] What the heck?
[screaming, grunting]
-[Dottie] What is that?
[Phil] Watch out!
[girl screams]
[dramatic music playing]
[girl crying]
[woman screams]
[Barbara screams]
[woman gagging, coughing]
[dramatic music continues]
[boy] We're all gonna die!
-[boy grunts]
That's awesome!
[inhales] That was a disgrace!
Ive never seen anything
more embarrassing in all my life!
I can't believe
I thought you had a shot at greatness.
[Marmaduke whimpers]
Congratulations, Phil.
You've discovered a new breed of dog.
The Not-So-Great Dane.
-[Billy] It's okay, boy.
You don't have to do this anymore.
It's all over.
[high-pitched coughing]
-[school bell rings]
-[upbeat music playing]
[girls laughing]
[laughs] Gross.
Hey, guys.
[cheerleaders laughing]
Watch out. It's El Stinko!
She shares a home with Scooby Poo!
-[sad music playing]
-[cheerleader] Ew!
[laughing continues]
[upbeat music playing]
[boy] Check it out.
[boys laughing]
Your dog is disgusting!
Take it back!
-[boy taunting in singsong]
-[boy 2] Get him!
[boys laughing]
[boy 2] Loser!
[sentimental music playing]
[Marmaduke] Billy?
Say something nice to your dog.
I mean
You are who you are, Marmaduke.
Oh, Phil means well,
but he's not really good
at the old pick-me-up speech.
Oh, come on. It's not that big a deal.
So you lost the dog show competition.
I didn't just lose.
I lost it in the championship trophy
in front of 500 people.
Do you have any idea
how humiliating that is?
-Then I got my butt stuck in the trophy.
-[inhales sharply]
And tt took two security guards
to get it out!
Well, that's a memory the dog show crowd
will cherish for the rest of their lives.
Probably best if you lay low for a while.
This will all blow over.
I hope.
[groans, whimpers]
[treat thuds]
[birds chirping]
[crickets chirping]
[light switch clicks]
I quit cheerleading today.
[Dottie] Oh, honey.
And I always thought Dad would be
the reason why I had no friends in school.
Thanks, Barb.
Our dog's a loser!
He's not a loser!
Some dogs are meant to be champions.
Some dogs are meant to be
Messy, clumsy, undisciplined dogs.
Mom's right.
The whole thing is unfortunate.
But the best thing we can do
is put the whole thing behind us.
-[record scratches]
[epic orchestral music playing]
-[record scratches]
-What is it?
Guy wants us to pay
for the training costs.
Did you agree to that?
It was supposed
to come out of the prize money
that we didn't win.
We're all losers!
[sighs] It's all my fault.
[Dottie] Oh, honey. It's gonna be okay.
[somber music playing]
I'm really sorry.
-[thunder rumbling]
-[King Tut sighs]
[dramatic up-tempo music playing]
[Dottie] Kids, some dogs
are meant to be champions.
Some dogs are meant to be
[Barbara] Our dog's a loser!
[Zeus] The only thing you're going to win
is total humiliation
for you and your family.
[Phil] He's gone too far, Dottie.
Maybe we need to enroll Marmaduke
in obedience school.
[Guy] You've discovered
a new breed of dog,
the Not-So-Great Dane.
-[car horn blaring]
Theyll be better off without me.
I'm such a loser.
[car horn blaring]
-[tires squealing]
King Tut!
-[car horns beeping]
[tires squealing]
[grunting in slow motion]
-[car horn beeping]
What were you doing out there?
Waiting for you.
[King Tut] I knew I wasnt in any danger
because youll do
whatever it takes to make sure
that the whole family is safe and sound.
Tell that to Billy and Barbara.
[King Tut] Nobody wins
their first competition.
You just need to go back out there
and make things right.
Are you kidding? All that training?
What a joke.
Guy was right.
-There is a champion inside of you.
-[soft piano music playing]
How do you know?
Because he just saved me.
Believe in yourself.
Believe I'm a champion?
[King Tut] Yep.
Come on. Let's go home.
[Marmaduke] I am a champion.
I'm the greatest dog of all time.
[King Tut] I wouldn't go that far,
but top five million for sure.
[Marmaduke] Awesome!
-[knocking on door]
-[knocking on door]
[knocking continues]
I'm back. Let's do this.
Oh, look. It's you. Listen.
It was unfair for me to think that
you had what it takes to be a champion.
-A champion makes the impossible possible.
But all youve done is made it
impossible to be a champion.
Go home, dog.
I'll show you what a real champion can do.
[intense music playing]
[Big Ben tolls]
[water splashes]
This amazing dog
has just done the impossible
and made a solo trip around the world.
How can this be?
[reporter] We're also getting reports
that this mysteriousdog
traversed the Great Wall,
and was also spotted crossing--
-[crowd cheering]
-[glass shatters]
-[Billy] There's Marmaduke!
[cheering continues]
[man] Marmaduke's the best!
[boy] Way to go, Marmaduke!
-[dogs barking]
-[cheering continues]
[water dripping]
-[dogs barking]
-[crowd cheering]
I get it, okay?
This dog wants another chance.
Well, I gave him a chance, and he failed.
I was wrong.
There's no champion inside of him.
-[man protesting]
-So, please, just leave.
-[man] You stink!
What a jerk.
It's okay, boy.
-[woman] Aw, come on!
-[man] You're the worst.
If you don't get off my lawn,
I'll call the cops.
Call 'em.
Because it appears
somebody stole your integrity.
-[crowd gasps]
-Good one, Billy.
-[man] Yeah, he's right!
[huffs, growls]
You're the one that told Marmaduke
you'd turn him into a world champion.
[man] That's right. Tell him how it is!
-But if there's a failure in this story
-[man] Tell him.
it's you!
Come on, boy!
[woman] Listen to the kid!
[crowd protesting]
Hmm. He's right.
[man] Who needs you? Come on. We're going.
-[Marmaduke whimpers]
-[footsteps approaching]
Nobody's ever called me a failure.
What's your point?
My point is
that I like what the boy said
about me being a failure.
You do?
Never accepting failure. Never giving up.
That is how you make
the impossible possible.
And that is what made me
the greatest dog trainer
the world has ever seen!
Thank you for calling me a failure!
You reminded me of what I saw
in your dog in the first place.
[Billy grunts]
-Oh, we're going to do great things.
[Marmaduke grunts]
Pack your bags, because we're going
to the World Dog Championship!
-[crowd cheering]
-[Guy laughing]
-[dogs barking]
-[boy] Marmaduke, you rock!
Uh, what just happened?
I'm not sure.
Well, I think Marmaduke
has his trainer back.
Nobody can annoy somebody into doing
something they don't wanna do like my dog.
Yep. That's kinda always been my motto.
[Barbara] Yay! Marmaduke!
You did it! I love you!
[dogs barking]
-[jazzy music playing]
-[phone ringing]
[clears throat]
Hello, Amy.
Oh. [chuckles]
Guy Hilton.
I have a favor to ask the President
of the World Dog Championship.
What kind of favor?
I want to bring a rookie
-to this years competition.
Anything for you.
And don't make any dinner plans
because I'm taking you
to that cozy place we went to last time.
I'd like that.
[Guy] Perfect.
See you soon.
Bye, Guy.
[upbeat music playing]
[Billy] Oh, I hope Dad
buys a car like this!
[Marmaduke] My stomach is bubbling,
and that never ends well.
-Okay. Don't be nervous, buddy.
It's just a dog show.
[Guy] Showtime.
[camera shutters clicking]
[man] Marmaduke!
[Dottie] Oh my goodness.
[Phil] Hey! Wait up!
[woman] You look good!
[cheering continues]
[man] Juan Pedro, you're a hero!
[in Spanish accent] What is
that delicious smell?
[trainer] Juan Pedro, self-control.
[woman] Shantrelle! Shantrelle!
[in French accent] This humidity
is not doing my coat any favors.
[grunting, snarls]
[in British accent] Give us
another chop, eh?
Good old boy.
-[man] Vinnie!
If we are true to ourselves,
then we have already won.
[Zeus chuckles]
So which of these mangy mutts
is fighting for second place?
-[man] Zeus!
[man] Can I get a picture
of the greatest of all time?
[dog barks]
[trainer] You are truly the best dog ever.
Now, win!
[Guy humming]
Are we sure these are all dogs?
I mean, that one has two rear ends.
-[Marmaduke] Oh.
How does a dog get muscles like that?
[straining, grunting]
[humming continues]
-[leg rattles]
Wait. Where's me protein shake?
Ronnie, this ain't funny.
Ronnie! Ronnie! [barks]
There you go, sunshine.
[chuckles] There you go.
Hey, Guy, where's my protein shake?
Hold still, Marmaduke.
[gasps, sighs]
[whimsical music playing]
[brush thuds]
Don't move.
Wait, don't leave me.
I'm not good in social situations.
It gives me really bad gas.
[stomach rumbles]
Hello, Guy.
Thanks for making
this happen at the last minute.
[Amy chuckles]
Of course. I was glad you called.
It's really good to see you.
I'd love to chat,
but I've got to get back to my office now.
Amy, wait.
Are we still on for dinner?
[Amy] You do owe me a dinner.
[Guy] Great!
-Huh? Huh?
Hey, hello.
[in French accent] I haven't seen
you around.
[nervously] Yeah, well. Um, about that,
I I'm I'm I'm kinda new
to this stuff, so
Juan, buddy, you call that a scarf?
I thought it was a dishrag.
Hey, Hansel.
Ooh,better cut back on the strudel.
Your belly's starting to drag
on the floor.
-[laughs menacingly]
All the way from Shanghai
just to lose to me? [laughs]
Why waste your-- [grunts]
-[energy reverberating]
Choose your words wisely, Mr. Zeus.
[Zeus grunts]
They may be your downfall.
Whatever. [clears throat]
[muttering] Crazy dog.
Don't be so nervous.
I don't bite.
[hesitantly] Okay.
Unless you want me to.
What? Huh?
Au revoir!
Hey, Shantrelle.
Let's do lunch.
-[scoffs] As if.
[chuckles] Same old Shantrelle.
[indistinct chatter]
I never expected to see you again
after what happened at the last dog show.
You tricked me. You're a weasel.
Easy, big boy.
Look, do you really want
to go out on the competition floor
and embarrass yourself
while the whole world is watching?
The only embarrassment here
is you and your overpriced shampoo.
Now, if youll excuse me,
I have to prepare my victory speech.
-[crowd gasps]
-[babbles dizzily]
-[crowd chuckles]
[reporter] Welcome to
the World Dog Championship.
There are always
so many incredible stories at this show.
But topping my list is the return
of the dog whisperer himself,
Guy Hilton, here with the star
of the "Pool Flop Fail,"
[cheering, applauding]
Are you ready?
I I was ready born.
I mean, I wasn't ready to be born.
I was born to be ready.
The simple answer is just yes.
Welcome back, dog aficionados!
This year is going to be a doozy.
-Bring out the dogs!
[crowd cheering]
[announcer] Ah. And here they come
in all their majesty.
[cheering continues]
-Go, Marmaduke!
[Billy] Yeah! Yay! Woo-hoo!
[man] Yes!
[Phil] Go, Marmaduke!
[announcer] Looks like it's time to start
the Obedience Section of the competition
where the canine's self-control is tested
with a baconized version
of their favorite treat.
Now, if I was a dog, ladies and gentlemen,
and my wife might say
there's no "if" about it
[laughs, sighs]
She hates me. [clears throat]
I I would struggle during this part
of the competition.
[crowd cheering]
[in Spanish accent] My fans, they love me.
[announcer] Let's see
if Juan Pedro can resist
the bacon taco for 30 seconds!
[sniffing] Bacon taco?
What a great idea! That's amazing.
[licks lips]
I love it! I love it!
Juan Pedro, self-control.
[licks lips] I love it!
[announcer] The little guy
is eyeballing that taco,
but the promise of the Championship
trophy is way stronger than a--
-[screams, chomps]
-[trainer] Ay! Ay!
-[Amy gasps]
-[trainer] Oh no!
Ay, ay, ay!
He needs his medication!
Looks like Juan Pedro
has been disqualified.
-[buzzer blares]
-[trainer] No, it's not his fault!
[Juan Pedro growling]
[trainer] Oh no!
Ay! [grunts]
Oh, where'd you come from?
-[mystical music playing]
-The bacon is your enemy.
[Zhi] To beat the bacon,
you have to become the bacon.
[gong resonates]
Become the bacon, huh?
You are a strange little dog.
[Zhi] Good luck.
-[announcer] Next up is Marmaduke!
Remember, focus.
Focus. Got it.
-[crowd cheering]
-Become the bacon.
Bacon pizza?!
[in singsong] Bacon! B b bacon!
Oh. He's definitely gonna cave.
Come on, boy.
Don't be you!
[panting, strains]
[whispering] Be the bacon.
Come on, man. Be the bacon.
You are the bacon.
[shudders] Huh?
I wouldn't eat me.
Would you eat me?
-[timer dings]
[crowd cheering]
Go, Marmaduke!
[Guy] Great job, Marmaduke.
[Marmaduke] Hey,
you could've saved me a bite.
He wouldn't be able to resist Shantrelle.
[announcer] One of my favorite events
is the Obstacle Course.
And first up is Zeus! [giggles]
-[blows whistle]
[crowd cheering]
[engine roaring]
[crowd cheering]
[tires squealing]
[brakes screeching]
[crowd cheering]
[laughing gleefully]
[announcer] And just like his namesake,
Zeus crosses the finish line
like a bolt of lightning.
[Henri chuckling]
You got this.
Just like we practiced.
Be the bacon, Marmaduke. You can do it.
-Hey, furbag.
What do you want?
Remember, when you fall flat
on your stupid face,
nobody expected you to win anyway.
[laughs obnoxiously]
[grumbles] I'll show you.
[announcer] Next up is Marmaduke!
[crowd cheers]
-[liquid sloshing]
-[Marmaduke] Huh? Huh?
Be the bacon. The bacon! The the bacon!
-[blows whistle]
-Marmaduke, what's happening?
-Wow! Look at Marmaduke go!
-[Barbara] Yay!
[grunts] Aah!
-[crowd cheers]
I can't believe I did it.
-[legs warble]
[laughing gleefully]
Ugh! No freakin' way!
-Yay! Marmaduke!
-Go Marmaduke!
[floor squeaking]
Huh? Wha? [grunting]
[squeals nervously]
Aah! [screams]
[crowd exclaiming]
["Sad Trombone" plays]
-[Guy grunts]
-[Marmaduke groans]
-[Guy groaning hoarsely]
[upbeat music playing]
In a crazy turn of events,
Guy Hilton's attempt to win
the championship with a rookie dog
has ended in a terrible injury.
Looks like this underdog
landed under his dog.
[announcer] The talent show
is about to begin.
Unfortunately, Marmaduke
will not be competing
due to Guy Hiltons accident.
[Amy] Guy is at the hospital now.
I just wanted to let you know
he's going to be fine.
I'm really sorry
you won't be able to finish the show.
[gentle music playing]
I think your dog has a lot of heart.
Marmaduke was great today.
[Phil and Dottie] Thanks.
I've gotta go get ready
for the talent show. Take care.
[Phil and Dottie] Bye.
I know you're sad right now.
But this is just like the time
that Jeremy Smith told Kathy
he was gonna ask me to the Spring Dance,
but he ended up choosing Becky
and I had to go with Mike.
That was
beautiful, Barbara.
[sighing] Oh.
Should we just call a taxi and go home?
The Winslows are a lot of things.
Bad golfers.
Those neighbors who borrow tools
and forget where they put them.
Always late for church.
Inconsiderate drivers.
Constant underachievers.
Your point, honey?
We are not quitters.
Marmaduke, you're not like
those other dogs.
Some say you're too big.
I say you're too big-hearted.
And I know the best dog in the whole world
is staring me right in the face.
[Phil] So, if you wanna
finish what you started
I I do.
Then I think we can find you
a new trainer.
Team Winslow!
[Marmaduke] Huh?
Come on, bring it in.
-[Marmaduke] Let's do it.
-[all] Yeah!
-[Dottie laughs]
-[Marmaduke] Get in there, Puddin'.
-[Dottie] Silly dog.
-[Marmaduke howls]
[upbeat music playing]
We've reached the final event that decides
which of these amazing specimens
will be named the greatest dog on earth
and win the million-dollar prize!
Now to my favorite part, the talent show.
[crowd cheering]
[announcer] First up,
its Vinnie and Ronnie
with their amazing display
of theStaffordshires strength!
-[rock and roll music playing]
-[crowd gasps]
-[judge] Oh!
-[judges exclaiming]
[grunts, strains]
[thud reverberates]
[judge] Whoo! Yes!
That is one strong dog.
Next up, its Shantrelle
and her seductive Parisian extravaganza!
[pop music playing]
Ooh. Ah!
[panting] Whoa!
[laughing] Wow!
Let's go
[pop music continues]
Bring it back to the break
My body shake, shake
Got to put it down now
Put it down now
[blows kiss]
[announcer] Get ready for
Zhi and Fus spectacular blend
of martial arts
and the mystical powers of the East.
[all gasp]
[rapping] I'm a mystic
Gonna be ballistic
Be here where my game stays clear
And never polished
I'm about to change the game up
Your game's up, ha!
Follow the shake-up, ha!
Fake out
That's what I wanna be
-That was awesome!
Wow, these dogs are putting on
an amazing show. Yay!
Bu how did he land on the tip
of that spear without getting skewered?
[strains, sighs]
[announcer] Next up, Zeus and Henri,
demonstrating the mesmerizing power
of the Afghans sparkling fur!
Look deeply
into the golden fleece of my Zeus.
-[Henri] Keep your eyes focused.
Whoa! Huh?
[dazed murmuring]
You are now in a trance.
You will now obey Zeus.
[crowd] Obey Zeus
Obey Zeus Obey Zeus
-[crowd chanting] Obey Zeus
-Obey Zeus Obey Zeus
-[smacking, yelping]
-Suckers. [chuckles]
-[crowd] Obey Zeus
Obey Zeus
[all gasp, grunt]
-[chuckles, exhales]
-[crowd] Obey Zeus
-[chanting] Obey Zeus
-[chanting continues]
[laughing] Hey.
[Henri] You will give Zeus
the perfect score.
The trance is over!
[all] Huh?
[gasping] Oh!
[indistinct chatter]
[man chuckles]
-[warbles, splutters]
-[crowd cheering]
Oh, uh Wow, that was incredible!
Wasn't it?
[judge laughing gleefully]
-[crowd gasps]
-[gasps softly]
[laughs, stops]
[chuckles nervously]
[announcer] Marmaduke is back
in the competition
with his new trainer, Team Winslow.
Next up,Marmaduke and Billy take us back
to the lawless days of the Wild West!
[crowd cheering]
-[man] Marmaduke is back!
-[woman] Whoo! Marmaduke!
And I think Black Bart
might be roamin' around these parts.
[Marmaduke growls]
Lookin' for me?
-Yeah. [growls]
-We sure are.
Come and get me.
-[neighs, howls]
Get him! Get him! Yeehaw!
-[Marmaduke] Let's get that varmint!
-[Billy] Yeah!
-We're bringin' you in!
-[growls, neighs]
[both cheering]
[Marmaduke] You ain't gettin' away!
[Marmaduke] One rail slide, comin' up!
[Billy] Yahoo! I got ya!
You cant get away from us, Black Bart.
[laughs evilly]
You'll never take me alive.
Have it your way.
-[gun firing]
-[Marmaduke] Dance, kitty cat!
-[King Tut] Meow!
-[Marmaduke] Dance!
Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.
Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow.
-Yay! Marmaduke!
-[Billy laughs]
-[upbeat music playing]
-Time to bust a move!
-[Billy] Yeah!
[Marmaduke grunting]
Fantastic, Marmaduke!
This is stupid. That isn't talent.
[both chuckle]
Why are you dancing?
Stop it!
-[music ends]
-[crowd cheers]
I can't believe you made it.
I wasn't gonna miss your big show.
You can take it from here, pal.
See ya, buddy.
[Amy] Woo-hoo!
Yes! Woo-hoo!
[Marmaduke] Get out here, Team Winslow!
[cheering continues]
-[Barbara whooping]
-[Billy laughs]
[Dottie] Yay!
Oh, that was awesome!
[Phil] Everyone loves you, Marmaduke.
[Marmaduke] I mean, what's not to love?
[Vinnie grunting]
[announcer] And now, the moment
youve all been waiting for.
-And this year's World Dog Champion is
Smell ya later, losers.
-[crowd cheers]
[Henri] Yes!
[judge laughing]
I knew me quads would be me downfall.
Sorry you didn't win, buddy.
At least I got to show the world
what kind of dog I am.
-[Henri laughing]
-[Amy gasps]
[judge and Henri laughing]
Oh, Zeus is so, so special.
So, so special?
Hmm. I've heard that before.
Zeus is so, so special.
Zeus is so, so special.
I knew he was a cheater.
We can't let him get away with this.
Hmm. [grunts]
[energy pulsating]
[warbles dizzily, grunts]
-[crowd gasps]
-[giggles nervously]
-[Henri] Huh?
[quavers] Gospodi!
Who the heck is that guy?
[chuckles nervously]
[Amy] Security! Security!
Huh? What are you guys doing?!
Hey! You got the wrong guy!
-Stop! Let me go!
-[crowd cheers]
All right! Yeah!
Zeus has been disqualified.
-And the new World Dog Champion is
[crowd cheering]
[Zhi] Hmm.
This can't happen.
That trophy's mine.
I'm supposed to be champion!
[Amy gasps]
Smell you later.
The kick that isn't there.
Good one,Marmaduke. [groans]
[growling] You!
[Zeus growls]
I am going to rip
those stupid floppy ears off your head!
[metal creaking]
[man exclaiming nervously]
I'm okay!
[quavers] I'm not okay!
[crowd screaming]
-Hold on!
-Watch out!
[metal screeches]
-I got ya, Billy!
-Get a vet! Somebody, please!
Talk to me.
Oh no!
[hoarsely] Please, boy. Be okay.
[Phil] Oh
Marmaduke was a good dog.
He was loved by all.
Marmaduke never wanted to hurt anyone.
-Chasing after cats.
[Phil] Knocking down hedges.
Never passing up a good bone.
Hogging my favorite chair.
His heart was always in the right place.
We should never have tried to train you.
-[machinery beeping]
-You were perfect just the way you were.
We will missyou
very much.
[all crying]
[crying, sniffling]
Is there still time
to hit the Awards Banquet?
-[all] Marmaduke!
-[crowd cheers]
-[Phil laughs]
-[Dottie] Marmaduke, you sweet dog.
-[Phil] Aw.
-[Billy laughs]
[Barbara] I love you guys.
Right back at you, guys.
Where's my trophy?
-[security guard] Come on, you.
-I'm the World Champion.
I'm the World Champion!
See ya later, Zoser. [chuckles]
Don't let the doggy flap
hit you on the way out.
You are not like any dog I've ever met.
Yeah, I I've been hearing
that a lot lately.
-[man] Whoo! Yeah!
Ooh la la!
[Marmaduke] So that's my rags-to-riches,
happily-ever-after, Cinderella story.
No more plot twists,
darkest hours, or agonies of defeat.
So could I please have
some of that bacon pizza now?
La, la
He's got a big heart
Big love
Big style, huge smile
[rapping] I'm the biggest dog around
The Greatest Dane
In the whole darn town
But my family doesn't understand
I gotta eat
It's my command
Now, I love my family
Yes, I do
But sometimes they think
That I'm crazy too
There's just no if, ands, or buts
But when I see food
I kinda go nuts!
I try to be cool
But then I lose it
If I don't eat, I have a fit!
Marmaduke says
Everybody now
Then there's cats
I gotta chase them
It's a dog's job
It's my description
Cars and bugs
Postman and a cat
I chase them all
And then I sleep on my mat
I sleep all day
I sleep all night
Don't wake up until the morning light
And then it starts all over again
I just get hungry and it never ends!
Marmaduke says
Everybody now
Now this is my life, as you can see
And I live with the Winslow family
I don't want money
And I don't want fame
I just want love
'Cause that's the name of the game!
Marmaduke says
Everybody now
He's a big dog
We're gonna have a blowout
In my backyard
Aw yeah
Dogs gone wild
I dedicate this to the neighborhood
It's a blowout in my backyard
Everyone's invited
And they're comin' from afar
I really wanna be there
But I'm stuck inside my bedroom
Don't know how I'll get out
But inside, I cannot stay
You know it's not a party
Unless I bring my party ways
It's finally time to break out
To crash right through the window
Nothin's gonna stop me now
'Cause it's finally time
To party with you
Aw yeah
Today we're gonna party
With the whole pack in my backyard
Hoo, hoo, hoo
Stuck in my room
Got my face against the window
Textin' all my friends
My neighbor's just a weirdo
Party people jammin'
In my back, back, backyard
Dogs gone wild
Dogs gone crazy
Been so long
Since I've seen the light of day
Starin' at the walls
Watchin' ticktock
Ticktock, ticktock, ticktock
Someone get me outta here
Aw, throw me a bone
[pop music playing]
[pop music ends]