Mile End Kicks (2025) Movie Script
1
(particles gusting)
(faint, distant banging)
(ethereal music)
(dramatic music)
(subway doors chiming)
(indistinct crowd chatter)
(cheers, applause)
(upbeat music)
(crowd screaming)
What's up, Toronto?
(cheers, applause)
We're Islands, from Montreal.
I've put on
Something you
can't switch off
I hope I don't cry
But I know I will
And you know how it feels
On the north side,
on the south side
They sing along
when you switch on
Hey!
We were wondering,
what are you writing?
Oh, I'm, like,
I'm reviewing the show.
Oh, cool!
Yeah, I'm a music critic.
Awesome.
(cheering)
Switch on
To be a fan of Islands
is to be a fan of Montreal,
a city in Quebec that's become
the most exciting place
in the world
for indie rock.
It's the city where
Arcade Fire created Funeral,
where up-and-coming artists
like Grimes and Mac DeMarco
spent $300 a month
to record albums
in their bedrooms.
As the mythos of Montreal grew,
journalists began calling it
the new Seattle.
It's dreamy
to think about a French city
full of musicians
who exist solely
on bagels and cigarettes,
all living in inexpensive,
glorious apartments
steps away from the venues
where they play epic concerts
late into the night.
Go into the city
and switch up the pity
On the train,
someone says...
And it's not even a contest.
Zen Arcade is Hsker Du's
best album by far!
It's--it's a post-hardcore
fucking masterpiece!
You're dead inside.
I personally prefer
Flip Your Wig.
Oh, said no one fucking ever
in the history of modern--
Oh, my God, you don't know
what it means to be a sellout,
because you are
a fucking sellout!
Totally.
Yeah, like their song, um,
"Double Nickels on the Dime."
-That's the Minutemen.
-Yeah.
(chuckling)
Anyway, back to you
about being a sellout.
I am not a sellout...
(indistinct arguing continues)
Amazing Grace.
I, um...
I fucking loved your Islands
article, so good.
Super, super good.
Um...did you actually
do coke with that guy?
Everybody wants to do
cocaine with me, Jeff.
Oh, of course, of course.
Why wouldn't they?
They're only human.
Yeah.
(indistinct chatter)
(envelope tears)
(funky music)
(gasps)
Ahh! Yes!
At the end of what you thought
was just a stop in the clock
(message chimes)
Found out you got older
than you thought
At the end
of what you thought of
as a great
somnambulant game
All you found
among the remains
was a few frames
(scoffs)
(tapping at keys)
On the other side
was an angel sea
On the distant shore,
it was never to be
Teeming with the thoughts
slipped out of reach
Fell away
like the sand to--
(final tap at keyboard)
(fluorescent lights hum)
(birds chirping, dog barks)
You've overpacked,
just take something out.
Mom, I did not overpack!
And now, we're gonna
miss your bus.
No, we're not.
It's okay.
I just don't understand
why you have to move
to Montreal.
You're not even French.
I'm gonna write a book
this summer.
Yeah? With what money?
Mom, you don't have
to understand everything
that I do, okay?
Sometimes,
I am just doing things.
1954 was a turning point
for Miles Davis.
Inspired by his hero,
Sugar Ray Robinson,
Davis decided it was
finally time to quit heroin.
After a touring engagement
with bebop drummer Max Roach,
Davis took--
See you later, Dad.
Oh, yeah.
Love you, Dad.
Bye!
Au revoir.
(uneasy laughter)
Oh, God.
(grunts)
-(engine starts)
-Phew!
(soft music)
Do you think I have time
to just go back in--
No, we do not.
You can buy bras,
you can buy underwear.
Okay.
Get the bag...
...out of the trunk.
(grunts)
-Thank you.
-For you. Okay.
-Goodbye, I love you so much.
-Bye! Love you.
Have a good time
in Montreal.
-Okay, I gotta go, I gotta go.
-Call me. Call me!
Okay.
-Hello.
-Hi.
(soft, indistinct chatter)
(brakes whoosh)
(bright music)
I am saved, I am saved
And oh,
would you believe it?
All of the day
I felt his presence near me
I know they won't
believe me, but
And, uh, what made you
decide to move?
Um, to get away from
certain sort of stifling
negative environments
that I had been in.
I lived in Toronto on my own
for a couple years,
just to learn
whatever it is you learn
when you're on your own,
and I grew personally,
which I think sort of
had quite a bit to do with--
with why the record is
the way that it is.
You won't regret
if you choose to believe it
Freedom, silence
always, yeah
All these darkened hallways
Oh...
Oh
Oh...
Oh
Oh...
Oh
Thank you!
Oh
Darkness always
It doesn't make much sense
Darkness always
Away from me,
calling "stay"
(engine revs)
(birds chirping)
(faint, indistinct chatter)
(grunts)
(heavy thud)
(exhales loudly)
(unzipping)
(bell faintly tolling)
Oh, my God, Mom, stop giving me
these stupid rocks.
(faint squeaking
and thumping noises)
(man and woman speaking French)
It's like this,
it's like this, right?
Right?
Oh my God, I'm not sure!
(speaking impassioned French)
Oh, shit!
(moaning)
(sighing)
Oh, fuck.
(footsteps creaking)
(lid sharply falls)
(toilet flushing)
Hi!
Hey, Madeleine.
How was the bus?
Um, long.
(Madeleine chuckles)
Yeah, this is, uh,
this is my, um...
-That's me.
-Nice, nice, nice, eh?
(awkward laughter)
Well, are you hungry?
(mellow music)
Oh, yes.
Ready!
Madeleine, this looks amazing.
I had, like, half a toaster
strudel this morning.
Um...
No.
Um, he's asking, uh,
why you moved here.
Oh. Yeah, um...
I'm trying to write a book
this summer.
-Oh!
-A 33 1/3rd,
they're like, um,
these books about records.
I still need to pitch it,
but I'm sure it's gonna happen.
Mine's about
Jagged Little Pill
by Alanis Morissette.
"Isn't it ironic,
don't you think?"
It's like rain
On your wedding day
Oh, okay.
(Hugo clears his throat)
Mm, um...do you speak French,
Grace?
-No.
-No?
No, um, I pretty much stopped
after the pizza unit
in grade five.
But I do know
all the toppings, though.
Um, there's, uh...
Um...
-Mm-hm.
-Right? Um...
Well, you're good,
you know everything.
(Madeleine laughs awkwardly)
He's just saying
that you're so funny.
-Oh, thank you.
-Mm-hm.
Thanks.
(video call ringing)
Hi, Phoebe.
Hey, how's it going, Grace?
Can you see me?
I can see you.
Uh, thanks for meeting on Skype.
It's a bummer you couldn't
come to the New York offices.
I received your book proposal
for Jagged Little Pill.
Uh, Jeff told me
to keep an eye on it.
He said you're the best
rock critic in Canada?
Cool!
So, pitch me.
Why should Jagged Little Pill
be a 33 1/3rd by Grace Pine?
Well, Alanis is a Canadian icon.
Yeah, nobody cares about that.
I just feel like...
like society hates it
when women talk
about themselves.
Anytime I have been honest
about my own experiences,
people have been, like,
"Shut the fuck up,"
like, including my own parents,
but...
Alanis was 19,
and-and she used
her life story as this, like,
weapon against the patriarchy.
And she sold 16 million
copies of her album, like,
around the world.
I-I do feel like that's
the first time in the culture
that a young woman has expressed
how fucking angry she was,
and it actually translated
to millions of dollars.
I think that's interesting...
I guess.
(soft music)
I like your take on the album.
I think it's smart.
Really?
Are you a fast writer?
Yeah, yeah, super fast.
Okay, great, 'cause we just had
this title fall through,
and there's this whole
thing with the printing,
and then,
the publishing schedule.
And trust me, it is so boring.
But what I need to know is,
can you get me a first draft
by July?
Is that doable?
-Yeah!
-Then I am pleased
to offer you a $500 advance,
and we can start
with you sending in
some chapter outlines.
(wings flapping)
(tapping at keys)
-(door opens)
-Hey, Grace.
We're just, uh, heading out
to buy some MDMA for tonight,
so, let me know
if you need anything.
Oh, I'm-I'm good,
I don't, like, "do drugs."
Well, there's a loft party
tonight at Torn Curtain.
You should come.
Hugo's band is playing, too.
Yeah, we're called Bone Patrol,
we're amazing.
(snickers)
Sounds great, but, um,
I'm on a deadline.
You should come,
because I'm gonna be DJing,
and we can, like,
dance behind the booth--
Okay, what? Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Sorry.
Kinda have to do
this thing now.
But come to Torn tonight,
do these drugs with us.
-Okay.
-Cool.
Have a--have a great drug deal!
(awkward chuckling)
And, Grace?
Dress hot.
Hm.
I'm a hustler, baby
(upbeat electronic music)
That's what
my daddy's made me
Yeah, I'm a hustler, baby
That's what
my daddy's made me
That's what they said
at my residency.
"No one makes video art
in Berlin!"
They make it, but it's shit.
Yeah, I'm a hustler, baby
That's what
my daddy's made me
(indistinct animated chatter)
If I had the money
to go to a record store,
I would
I, I would
There you are!
If I had the money
to go to a record store
(noisy kissing)
Oh!
Uh, I just, uh,
I just wanna wash my hands.
-Oh, okay.
-Thank you.
Hey, Claire,
can I have some coke?
(faint music, chatter, laughter)
(typing continues)
(soft clank)
(soft bubbling)
(gently exhales)
It's, um, it's okay,
you don't have to pretend
to look at your phone.
I also have social anxiety.
What?
No, I-I don't have
social anxiety.
Oh, I don't blame you.
Being alive is
completely insane.
(soft bubbling)
Want some weed?
No, thank you,
I don't, like, "do drugs."
(chuckling)
Actually, why not?
-Oh, huh.
-Yeah.
How do I, um, hit it?
Take a hit off that nozzle.
-Oh, okay.
-Yeah.
Do I have to press anything?
-No.
-Okay.
Just let it rip.
Oh, God, I'm scared!
(she chuckles nervously)
(soft bubbling)
(coughing)
I think I took too much.
(coughing continues)
Ooh!
Yeah, I don't have, like,
um, social anxiety.
I just...I feel uncomfortable
at a party
where I don't know anyone and,
like, everyone is on cocaine?
That's a legitimate feeling.
Thanks.
Do you, um, do know
these two French people,
Hugo and Madeleine?
They invited me.
Oh, yeah! Hugo plays drums
in my band.
Oh! You're a member
of Bone Patrol.
(he snickers)
-You've heard of us?
-Mm-hm.
Are you--are you gonna stay
for our set, or...
That depends.
What are your influences?
Mostly Big Shiny Tunes
1 through 5.
I'm Grace, by the way.
Oh, nice. I'm Archie.
Suckin' on my titties
like you wanted me
Yo! Get the fuck on stage!
Let's go!
I, uh, got to set up my axe.
Oh.
You good?
Yeah, I'm very high right now.
Sick.
Oh! Frig, sorry.
(punkish electronic music)
Oh, my God, you came!
I love this song!
Callin' me all the time
like Blondie
Check out
my Chrissy behind
It's fine all the time
What else is in...
Are you having fun?
Yeah, I smoked weed with this
guy that said he knows you,
-Archie?
-Oh yeah, yeah.
He's the only one I like
from Hugo's shitty band.
"Bone Patrol," that's
a fucking brutal band name.
(crowd cheers)
Yeah!
(cheers, applause)
You're hot!
We're Bone Patrol.
Before we start,
I-I have a very big
announcement to make, uh...
(faint crowd chatter)
Jesse, our bassist,
came out today.
He's gay!
(cheers, applause)
Dude, what the fuck?
Bone Patrol loves you,
and we support your quest
for the cock, okay?
No, but I told you--
but I told you guys this was,
like, a friend thing--
(crowd whoops)
What the fuck?
All right, this song's called
"Age, Sex, Location."
Hit it, Hugo.
(drumsticks click)
(loping alt-rock music)
I think I should stop
Connecting the dots
You know, I get that a lot
Advancing the plotlines,
not
I'm caught like a moth
Attracted to loss
But the wax is still soft
You didn't tell me
your boyfriend's band
sounds like Pavement!
What's that?
That's a band.
Always so lonely,
ambiguous--
Who's the lead singer?
Chevy?
He's the worst guy in Montreal.
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fuckin' ageless
Sexless, locationless nights
Locationless nights
You're a fucking jerk!
-Jesse.
-Okay?
I'm trying to be there
for you, dude.
I--I'm an ally.
(faint chatter)
That was a really great show.
Can I have a cigarette?
Oh! Sorry.
Thanks.
What is this? Are you gonna
help me with the van?
(indie music playing faintly)
Fuck this.
-Oh, he's mad.
-Dick.
So, what's your deal?
Uh, my deal is that I'm Grace,
and I just moved here
from Toronto.
Fuck that place.
You can't be an artist
in Toronto.
It's, like, really cool
that you can just say that.
-Say what?
-Like--
Excuse me!
Like, um,
call yourself an artist.
Uh, so, um, a few of your songs
remind me of Pavement.
No, no, we don't sound
like them.
Oh, I'm sorry, I did, uh...
who would you
compare yourself to?
Ariel Pink.
R. Stevie Moore.
Mm.
Charles Manson's solo material
is, like, a really big
influence on me.
I like music that's just,
like, unlistenable.
I think art should just
be hard to make.
-(van door slams)
-Hm.
And that's why I try to push
myself to the brink of insanity
at all times.
Yeah, I'm writing a book
this summer, so I'm, like,
pretty much alone all the time.
What's it about?
Uh, Jagged Little Pill
by Alanis Morissette?
'Kay.
I'm gonna go help Jesse
load the van
before he, like, kills himself.
-Yeah.
-See ya.
Jesse?
I'll help you.
Grab this amp, it's yours.
Hey, uh, you guys good
with the van?
No.
It's your turn.
(coughs)
Oh. Hey!
Hey!
What's up?
I think I'm gonna go home.
So. Your first lo-po.
What?
Loft party. Big step. Huge.
Yeah, but, like,
I was at a cotillion.
Like, like, I was, uh,
presented to society.
(she chuckles)
Huh.
Uh, where--where are we going?
We're, uh,
cutting across the tracks.
Feels kind of rape-y.
It's not rape-y.
(distant train whistle blares)
Sorry.
People usually cut
a bigger hole in the fence.
-Just go through that?
-Yeah.
I'm not looking
at your underwear.
Good. I stole them from my mom.
Phew!
(he grunts)
-Need help?
-No.
Okay.
(bright music)
Hey, oh--
Thank you.
(chatter in Yiddish)
Oh, my God.
I love Mile End.
Toronto doesn't have,
like, magical bagel shops
and, like,
Hasidic Jews everywhere.
What do they have?
Mostly jerks.
Oh, and condos.
Can I ask you something?
Why do French people hate me?
Mm.
It's pretty complicated.
Basically, French people
are okay if you exist.
You just can't work here
if you don't speak French.
Or, like, survive at all.
But luckily, Montreal is cheap
enough you, uh, get a grant,
or enough money from
your parents, you can stay,
so, it's like a waiting game.
People who wanna be artists
move here from Edmonton,
drop outta Concordia,
move to the Mile End,
and do drugs at loft parties
until they're forced
to get real jobs in Toronto.
Where are you from?
P.E.I.
Cute.
Chevy works here,
if you ever need Keds.
Fuckin' ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
You know, I had, like,
so much anxiety
at that party.
Oh.
Like, I just felt like
a huge loser all night.
Until we smoked weed, I guess.
Okay, I gotta teach you
my two-part system.
Oh, what's your
two-part system?
Number one: Act casual.
Ah!
Number two: Swag it out.
Hey, do you wanna, um,
like, like go inside
and, like, have sex with me?
Um...
That sounds great, but I can't.
Um, I'm celibate.
Huh. Why?
Personal reasons.
Night, Grace.
Night.
You live next door?
(chuckles)
What is that even
supposed to mean?
Double peace, bro.
All right, well, goodnight.
Or...morning.
Morning.
(relaxing music)
(city sounds)
Do they fit okay?
You wanna take a little walk
around and see what happens?
(chuckles)
Vans for the summer, classic.
Let me know if you need
any bigger sizes.
How do they fit, sweetie?
What's up?
Oh hey, I didn't
know you worked here!
Yeah, unfort'.
(upbeat music)
Do you, uh, do you
wanna try those on?
These? Yeah. Yeah, sure.
Um, size nine please.
Be right back.
Dreams are broken
Dreams are broken
Vessels on skin for you
Last pair in your size.
It's kind of rare.
It doesn't happen a lot.
I have delusion
I have delusion
Go walk.
(indistinct lyrics)
(clears throat)
That's a quality daytime shoe.
Yeah, um, they seem really,
uh, comfortable.
(indistinct lyrics)
So, um, how long have you been,
uh, a shoe salesman?
Uh...
-Too long.
-Mm.
I like to treat it like
it's an art project,
you know, shoes.
(indistinct lyrics)
So, um, how's that thing
you were talking about?
-My book?
-Yeah.
It's great!
I got a publishing deal!
It's unfounded
We're going--
Um, how's the band going, eh?
Um, got any shows coming up?
Yeah, it's good.
We have our first
EP launch in, uh, August,
um, but nothing's really
lined up.
It's...it's stupid.
Well, I'm a music critic.
I write for Spin sometimes.
Do you write for Pitchfork?
No. No, not Pitchfork.
But I am a big fan
of your work.
I could, like,
interview you sometime.
Yeah, we can do that.
Maybe this weekend.
Hey!
Could you see, um, how
much room my toes have?
I'm not supposed to touch
the customers' feet.
(exciting music)
(inhales sharply)
Does that feel good?
Yes.
(loud squeak)
Mm.
These blackberries
are so good, right?
Do I owe you any money for?
No, we can share food.
Just ask me first.
Okay.
(birds chirping)
(bells ringing)
Hey, do you ever think that
girls who date guys in bands
wanna be a guy in a band?
So it's like, don't
try to fuck Dave Grohl,
be Dave Grohl.
I don't know, do you wanna
be a musician?
No.
(laughs)
Oh, I'm interviewing
Chevy today.
Hmm.
What do you think
of this dress?
I don't know.
Think I'd show
your giant tits instead.
I...oh, um...
I don't really,
like, think of myself
as someone with giant tits.
I think of myself
as more of like, um,
like a brain in a jar.
(phone pings)
Oh my God, I'm sorry.
Maybe you guys should break up.
You think?
Text Hugo,
"You're a psychopath
and we need to break up."
But like, in French.
Can you do it maybe?
(sighs)
(fingers tap against phone)
Congrats you are
officially broken up.
(snorts)
(phone pings)
(yells)
That's my mom.
(laughs)
(distant clamoring)
(electric guitar strumming)
(exciting music)
Hey, Jesse.
Hey.
Is Chevy around?
Uh, no, those guys went out
to smoke weed,
but, uh, they'll all be back
for the Spin article.
I mean, do you want
to interview me?
Okay.
(clears throat)
Um, so how long have you
and Chevy known each other?
Um, since we were like 13.
Uh, we were in a ska band
together back in Edmonton.
A ska band? Really?
What was it called?
Um, it's called
Free Skanking Willies.
-Oh.
-It's Chevy's favorite movie.
But he always cries
at the end like a little bitch.
It's called REM, REM sleep.
Oh shit! Yo.
I was just telling Grace about,
uh, Free Skanking Willies.
FSW!
FS-dubs.
Hey, has anyone seen
my phone anywhere?
-Uh, I haven't seen it.
-You don't wanna be down there.
-Oh.
-Uh...
-Maybe you left it--
-Ooh, thank you.
-'Sup?
-'Sup?
It's really cool
you're doing this.
I didn't know
you wrote for Spin--
(cymbals crash)
The fuck, dude?
Uh, Grace, how do you
see this going, huh?
I mean, uh,
this is Bone Patrol's
first interview,
so we just all want
to be prepared, right?
-Right?
-Yeah, yeah.
Sure, yeah. Let me, um,
let me take out
my tape recorder.
All right, I think we can
just start really casual.
Maybe, um, one second...
let me get this on.
How much weed
do you guys smoke?
How much weed
don't we smoke?
"8.4! Best new interview!"
I smoke weed for, uh,
creative inspiration.
'Sup, bro.
With music, I just,
I really want to go deep
into the abyss, yeah.
And wha-and
what-what's the abyss?
I just wanna go deep, you know,
just so deep inside
that I completely disappear.
Creepy sex metaphors.
Great.
Relax.
Move your fat fucking ass
and let me check.
Yeah, I realize I hate pretty
much every aspect of music,
except recording
and production.
So, if I could be in a band
that doesn't play any shows
and only exists
on the internet,
that'd be ideal.
So, you don't wanna go on tour?
So, I can jerk off
into a toilet
of a hot dog restaurant
in Winnipeg?
You know, I actually call
masturbation, "Going on tour"
'cause they're pretty
much the same thing.
Come on, dude!
All right, can we go back
to the interview now?
N-none of that is going in.
Hey, are you okay, homie?
I'm fine, I just...
(overlapping voices)
Can I, can I talk to you, Arch?
Yeah.
Okay.
I just, I dunno why you're
talking all that shit
in front of Spin.
Unless that's how
you truly feel.
I know you think of yourself
as like this intense rock star,
but we sell Keds, bro.
I'm--We're not gonna,
like, "make it."
This band's gonna break
up in five years
and we'll all have to
get day jobs in Toronto,
probably in cybersecurity.
Aha! I found it, guys.
All right, I am ready.
What the fuck?
What?
Madeline just broke up with me.
Over text?
Haven't you guys been
together for, like, five years?
What the fuck is this?
It's in French.
No, she said,
"Je vous breakup."
It doesn't even sound like her.
So sorry, dude.
No, what the fuck, man?
No I can't, I can't.
Can you turn that off, please?
Oh yeah, sorry.
And all I really want
Is some patience
A way to calm
the angry voice
And all I really want
Is deliverance
(vocalizations)
Whoa!
Oh my God, oh my God!
I'm sorry.
Oh my God, you scared me!
Sorry. How was your date?
Uh, well, it was not a date,
the whole band was there.
Ah. Okay well,
did you see Hugo?
Yeah.
Oh my God.
(breathes heavily)
I can't be alone right now.
Hey, will you come with me
to this, uh, poetry reading?
It's near some
abandoned malting silo.
That actually
sounds really cool.
But I-I can't,
I gotta work on my Alanis--
Hi! Hi, everyone.
Hi, I'm Chlo.
And welcome
to the inaugural edition of,
"There Is No Such Thing
As A Safe Space."
(cheers)
(snaps)
To start off the event,
Laura Malta.
(cheers, snapping)
(pensive music)
Hey.
I stared at my lover.
Early, he said he was tired.
"Laura, I'm tired."
Of course, I heard,
"Laura, I'm tired of you."
To which I replied,
"Okay, I'm going
to see the cows."
We used to kiss like flowers.
We used to text for hours.
You shifted my molecules.
Now they're string cheese.
My fingers smelled like
oranges all winter.
But right before
the dream leaves,
I notice my skin
is actually rind
and everywhere,
there is zest.
Bonjour. Hi, I'm Guillaume.
Last night, I dreamt
I was a Starbucks cup.
Way too hot.
And bitter.
Then, a 15-year-old barista
threw me in the trash.
(laughs)
Some of the poets last night
just, honestly,
like,
we're not up to par, like--
-Hey.
-Hey.
I like what you read.
Ugh, let's go looking
for chacos.
Thanks.
I-I've never really been
to anything like this.
It's so cool everyone just
reads off their phones.
I-I'm a writer too.
Do you write poetry?
I'm more of, um,
a music critic.
Cool! Talk to Chlo!
I'm sure you could get in
on the next one.
Really?
Like I, like, read something?
-Yeah!
-Oh, I don't know.
Yeah! No, it's not a big deal.
What was that remix you were
working on this morning?
Um, you're not
supposed to hear!
-It's not done.
-It was so good.
I read your text.
Halo!
Excusez moi.
Sour Patch Kids?
Huh?
-Oh.
-Ah.
Debits?
(machine beeps)
One sec, sorry.
(machine beeps)
(distant music)
(machine dings)
What's up?
I-It's saying
I don't have any money.
Well, did you already spend
the advance?
The $500?! Yes!
Well, I'm not the one who moved
to another province
with no money!
You always wanna do
these big things,
but you can't do
everything in life--
Oh my God, Mom, just gimme
the thousand dollars!
That's all I fucking need!
I'm still waiting
for the check from Merge.
It's been four months!
They owe me $4,000!
Well then,
you need to get on Jeff!
Mom, I sent him the invoice.
He never responded!
Well, if someone
owed me $4,000,
I wouldn't be in Montreal
putzing around!
Oh my God.
(keyboard clacking)
(pensive music)
There goes your corpse again
Oh, yeah
Talking
with your new girlfriend
Oh, yeah
What you think that he said
You're better off dead
Oh, yeah, come
Oh, yeah
Come the last days of June
Oh, yeah
Will he go back to his tomb
(breathes heavily)
(moans)
(breath hitches)
(desk shaking)
(groans)
(breathes heavily)
Is that what you want?
Uh, I love that you wanna
get caught. Heh.
Great sex.
Yeah? All right.
(lights buzzing)
Easy
Easy
My man and me
(melancholic music)
We could rest
And remain here
Easily
(cries)
We are tested
and pained
By what's beyond
our bed
We are blessed
and sustained
By what is not said
No one knows what is coming
Or who will harvest
what we have sown
Or how I've been dulling
and dumbing
In the service
of the heart--
(computer pings)
(crickets chirp)
(sighs deeply)
(sighs)
(sighs)
(keyboard clacking)
When people talk about Alanis,
they mostly talk about
how angry she seemed.
But a large part of being female
is feeling angry
and insignificant
for most of your waking hours.
(somber music)
Alanis' Catholic upbringing
and pre-teen sexualization
at her most vulnerable age
was a Molotov cocktail,
heavy on the repression.
And when Alanis wasn't cutting
ribbons at mall openings
in the Ottawa Valley,
competing in talent shows,
or developing
a serious eating disorder,
due to pressure
from her label
who wanted her to compete
with the Tiffanys
and Madonnas of her era,
she felt guilty.
Like a lot of women,
it was for the things
she didn't even do.
(soft music)
I'm broke, but I'm happy
I'm poor, but I'm kind
I'm short, but I'm healthy
Yeah
I'm high, but I'm grounded
I'm sane, but I'm--
Hi, Phoebe.
Hey Grace, on a whole,
I think we're moving
in the right direction.
Your first chapter is great.
Okay.
But I think I need more
of your voice.
You know, what drew
me into your pitch
was how personal
Alanis is for you.
And right now,
sometimes, it's reading
like her Wikipedia page.
You could go deeper.
Anyway, I'm being
pulled into a meeting.
But you got this, okay? Bye!
And the other's givin'
a high-five
I feel drunk
but I'm sober
I'm young
and I'm underpaid
I'm tired
but I'm working--
(music distorts)
(breathes out)
(pensive music)
(keyboard clacks)
(intense music)
(laptop dings)
(birds chirp)
(gentle rock music)
Bone Patrol's debut EP
smacks of bro-dom.
Not the kind of bro
who wears Livestrong bracelets
and is currently taking
women's studies classes
to pick up chicks,
but the true bro,
the eternal bro,
the bro most loyal and kind.
Maybe even
your real-life bro
who taught you how to play
the baseline to Nirvana's
"Come As You Are"
and offered up his couch
as a landing spot
well until your late twenties.
With four sublime rock songs
that rarely exceed
the 4:20 mark,
the Montreal four piece--
comprised
of Archie Webber,
lead guitar,
Chevy Olsen, vocals,
Hugo Ct, drums,
and Jesse Matthews, bass--
wear their '90s indie rock
influences of Pavement
and Built to Spill
on the sleeves of their
beer-soaked hoodies.
La, la, la, la, la
But Bone Patrol ain't heavy.
(indistinct lyrics)
They're your bros.
Life
Fucking ageless
Sexless
locationless night
(pensive music)
Hey.
Hey.
Do you wanna go
for a beer or something?
Get off in like 20.
-Cool.
-Sick bio.
You write good.
(excited music)
(alarm beeps)
(alarm beeps)
Here you go.
Cheers.
(alarm beeps)
(alarm beeps)
(clears throat)
Uh...
(alarm beeps)
Sounds like something's,
uh, going off or something.
Oh yeah, yeah, that's the,
that's the carbon monoxide
detector or whatever.
It's fine.
You should probably
check that out.
Yeah.
(alarm beeps)
(alarm beeps)
(chuckles)
(moans)
One second, one second.
(sensual music)
Hey, mama, I wanna--
Is that R. Stevie Moore?
Mhm.
Love you
I love this song.
Do you feel about the same?
Hey, woman,
I wanna say that I need
You don't realize
what I have done, dear
You don't understand
that I'm the one, dear
Do you want me
to take my top off?
M-Maybe not?
You're good
to just kiss though.
D-Do you wanna, like,
touch my boobs or something?
It could be like really...
Okay.
(chuckles nervously)
Sick.
(chuckles)
(moans)
I-I just had this...
like, this--this fight...
(sighs)
...with this--
with my friend,
and I think she, like,
kind of, like,
wanted like, like,
a relationship.
And I'm just like...
...not good with serious shit,
you know?
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
I mean, it's always
an issue, you know?
'Cause I make music and...
...I can't get distracted.
Ever.
Absolutely.
Yeah, so, I feel like
we should just sort of
keep our whatever
kind of professional,
you know?
'Cause you're, like,
an important contact...
...in the industry.
I need to lie down.
(soft music)
Do you wanna take
your jeans off?
You would probably
be more comfortable.
No.
You feel really good.
This is good.
Archie!
(mellow music)
Oh, wazzup!
Wazzup!
(chuckles)
Hello.
Thank you.
(indistinct chatter)
(can pops open)
Um, do you ever, uh,
feel like a fuck-up?
Yeah, that's why I live here.
Why, you feel like a fuck-up?
I wrote a list of
goals for the summer
and I'm blowing it bad.
Can I see it?
It's pretty personal.
Even better.
Okay.
(soft music)
"Goals for summer in Montreal."
Okay, first of all,
great title.
Fuck off.
"Number one, write Alanis book.
Number two, learn French.
Number three, climb to the top
of the mountain.
Number four, have actual sex."
"Number five, fall in love."
How's all this going?
I can probably help.
Obviously not with number four.
Or number five 'cause I
don't believe in love, but...
Oh, sorry,
you don't believe in love?
I really, really don't.
Why?
Personal reasons.
What's up, Archie?
Wazzup.
Wazzup!
You two know each other?
This is Mile End,
there's like 75 people here.
Hey, I spoke to Chloe.
She put you on the list
for the next reading.
Oh my God, really?
It's part of this loft party
at Torn Curtain.
TOPS, Dishwasher, and Chevy
are gonna be playing too.
That's great! You can read
from your Alanis book.
Oh, yeah, yeah,
I gotta write that.
(webcam chiming)
("shutter" clicks)
(webcam chiming)
("shutter" clicks)
You can't turn
your love around
(email notification)
Every time I go outside
I feel the light
It hurts my eyes
-You can't turn your love
-(Grace squeals)
Hey.
(Madeleine hums)
(container opens)
How's your day?
It was good.
I just went grocery shopping.
How was yours?
It's good.
I got Bone Patrol interview.
I'm their publicist now.
Whatcha tryin' to say
Aren't you supposed
to write a book?
I can do both.
Back down, back down
Oh!
(paper rustling)
Ta-da!
I'm gonna have
my own DJ night,
and I'm gonna only play music
I love made by women.
And the best part
is that it starts
on the first day
of my period!
My God, Madeleine,
this is amazing!
Beyonc with a tampon!
-I know! Ha!
-That's sick.
(laughs)
Hey, uh...
when are you gonna pay me
for, uh, July's rent?
(insects chirring)
It's been over a week now,
so...
(chirring intensifies)
(fan humming)
(soft, tense music)
(sighs)
(laptop notification)
(energetic music)
(phone chimes)
(soft music)
Hoo!
Wow!
This is beautiful!
Hey, sick, man!
Oh, my gosh!
It's whatever.
Take a seat.
(strums guitar)
(clears throat)
-You recording?
-Yeah.
Okay, this is off my, uh,
solo thing
that I've been working on.
I don't know, it's whatever.
It's stupid.
It's called
"Korean Supermarket."
(sunglasses clatter)
(mellow guitar music)
Korean supermarket
I got a nice whip,
I gotta park it
Gochujang is
my favorite thing
at the Korean supermarket
The entrance,
it's got a big red carpet
Cashier is kind
but sincere
And I'm hopin',
hopin', hopin'
that I got enough
in my pocket
Down 'cause I'm broke up
on good coke
And I need to go to the...
Korean supermarket
Supermarket, supermarket
Supermarket,
supermarket
Supermarket
So many choices,
you gotta love it
At the Korean supermarket
I love
-That was pretty shit, but...
-(clapping)
That was amazing!
Thanks.
Um, we should totally
have sex here sometimes.
I love getting caught.
(sighs)
Can you...
can you just be chill?
I'm chill.
No, you're--you're not--
you're not chill.
(Chevy sighs)
You need to calm down.
You're not very chill, Grace.
You gotta calm your farm.
Oh, take a chill pill
Take a chill,
chill pill
Take a chill pill,
chill, chill, chill
(crunching)
Hey, stop eating my bread!
I'm--I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to.
Also, you owe me
two months of rent.
So, when are you gonna pay?
No, yeah, no, I, um...
Honestly, I just--
I have, um...
I have a negative
bank balance of $700.
But I have this big check
coming in from my old job.
And I swear,
as soon as I get it,
I will pay you back!
Just gimme the money
as soon as you can.
I will!
Yes, of course, I will!
(sighs)
What are you--
what are you up to tonight?
There's, um,
this loft party at Torn
that you should come to.
Yeah.
I'm reading something.
You know, I can't tonight
'cause my DJ night is tonight.
Fuck! It's tonight?
You're not coming to my night?
Madeleine, of course
I'm coming to your night.
It's gonna be amazing!
I'll come right after I read.
First new message.
Hey Grace, Phoebe here.
What's going on
with your draft?
You stopped answering my emails.
(mellow music)
So, who was
your first girlfriend?
Oh, um, I was 14,
but it wasn't like
a typical relationship
'cause, um, she's older.
Oh, how much older?
I was in grade nine,
she was in grade twelve.
But it's, like, cool.
It was cool that,
like, it happened.
It's just,
it got really complicated
when she went to college.
Mm.
(Archie sighs)
-Shannon.
-Shannon.
Are you excited
to read from your book?
Yeah, I think
that writing is hard
and that no one should do it.
(laughs)
Yeah, how long did
you write for, um,
that magazine for,
what was it called?
-Merch?
-Yeah.
About a year.
It's weird though, I--
I went on the website
last night
and all my articles are gone.
What the fuck?
Yeah, so there's like
400 articles that I wrote
that no one can read.
You wrote 400 articles
in a year?
Yeah, some, like,
investigative features,
cultural criticism,
political reporting.
And I used to write
about sex toys.
For the music magazine?
Yeah, the magazine decided
to fire the sex columnist
and my boss asked me
to write a column
where I reviewed
sex toys every week.
Yeah.
I, um, I also used
to have sex with my boss.
Oh.
Yeah, um,
but it's not like I, like,
loved it or anything.
I just kind of felt like
since I agreed to do the column
that I kind of brought it
on to myself.
I'm sorry, I just--
I don't know why
I'm--I'm telling you this.
I just feel like
maybe that's just--
No, I'm sorry
that it happened.
It just sounds really shitty.
I...
I guess we've both
been with people
who are older than us.
Well, I'm totally over it
now, so...
(dance music)
Uh-oh. I'd say Torn Curtain's
got a three-week loft span.
(Grace laughs)
How do you know?
I've seen a lot of lofts
come and go in my time.
When some space
in a warehouse becomes cool,
then McGill students find out.
Next, the police come
and arrest everyone.
-Oh!
-Ew.
Fuck me.
(indistinct chatter)
Oh, shit.
I printed out my story.
Do you think that I should be
reading it off my phone instead?
Nobody cares.
What?
You just graduated
to the third part
of my two-part system.
Act casual, swag it out,
nobody cares.
Nobody cares, Grace.
Everybody here
is just, like,
literally thinking
about themselves.
Wow, that is terrible advice.
You got my text?
Oh. Yeah, congrats.
Hey, that was a massive dump.
-Hey, Chevy.
-No.
No, not that one.
Uh...
The one about Jesse
possibly getting a bedbug
from his Grindr date.
Yeah, it's great
that he got on that.
-Hey.
-Grace!
(indistinct chatter)
(Archie sighs)
What's up with you
and the publicist, huh?
What, do you mean Grace?
Yeah.
We're friends.
Friends who like to fuck?
What?
Look, dude...
...she's a cum dumpster.
Hmm.
I just...
I gotta pee.
So, when do you go on?
Oh, thank you.
Well, they said
because I'm from Toronto,
that, um, I should
be the headliner.
Nice! You're like the Bono
of this loft party.
Yeah, and you're like The Edge.
(Archie chuckles)
Yeah, I'm pretty scared to read.
Hello, hi.
Wow, welcome back.
Thanks for being present.
Next up is, uh,
Chevy from Bones Patrol.
(cheering)
It's just...
it's just "Chevy."
Uh, this one is, uh, new.
(cheering)
-(button clicks)
-(intense music)
(cheering)
Don't look at me
(cheering)
Quit it
Stop
Oh
(energetic music)
Ah
(cheering)
I slept in my jeans
Dark hair
You over there
In the shadows
You're my shadow
Why do I wake up
seeing you next to me
(cheering)
By the time
you open your eyes
(indistinct lyrics)
Grab your thigh,
move your body next to me
Oh
Last time you open your eyes...
...I'm gone.
(laughs)
(screaming)
Why do I wake up
(indistinct lyrics)
(groaning)
Yeah!
I just wanna be loved
I just wanna be heard
I want it all, Montral.
I want all of you.
Good night.
(cheering)
(indistinct lyrics)
(mellow music)
Like we did on that day
Let's dream again
You're on after this.
Do you know how you
wanna be introduced?
(indistinct lyrics)
Think I'm gonna go
smoke a cigarette.
(indistinct chatter)
Do you see me?
Do I even exist to you?
Uh...
Yeah.
Yeah, it's just--
it's, like, confusing.
What is confusing?
I wanna see you, I do.
I...
I just...
I don't even know if I can be
in my own body right now.
Are all your songs about me?
No.
They're about me.
Hey, uh,
they, uh,
they called your name.
Oh, well, I don't--
I don't think I'm gonna read.
-Hey, Archie.
-Hi, Chevy.
Look, whatever you read
is gonna be
just another little part
of everyone's
meaningless lives.
But for you, this could
be a really big part.
Look, I think--
I think whether you read
at this loft party
is, like, a defining moment.
Hey, I have, like,
one beer at my house.
Um...
Yeah.
I think I'm gonna leave, okay?
Thank you so much
for coming with me.
Have a good night.
Wait!
Wazzup?
(indistinct chatter)
Ow! I mean the word
overrated is overrated.
I guess.
Hey, Jesse!
-Yo.
-What's up roomie?
Yo, yo, yo.
I didn't know
you guys were roommates.
Yeah, yeah,
when Chevy brings girls over,
I sleep in the van.
How's the puzzle going?
It's going good.
It looks good.
So, we want, like,
the purple ones up here.
Hey, Chevy,
are we having a beer?
Yeah.
-Cool.
-Now?
-Yeah.
-Yeah, yeah.
Bye, Jesse.
Bye.
Whoa.
(bags rustling)
What happened here?
Fucking Jesse
found a bedbug
when he came back
from his Grindr date.
Huh, it's good
that he's on that.
For sure, it's really good.
Anyways, we're supposed
to put all our shit into bags
to smother the bugs.
Whoa, oh!
Do you have bedbugs?
Trust me, I don't.
"All bedbugs mate
by traumatic insemination.
Female bedbugs possess
a reproductive tract
that functions
during oviposition,
but the male
does not use this tract
for sperm insemination.
Instead, the male pierces
the female's abdomen
with his hypodermic penis
and ejaculates
into the body cavity."
(beads rattle)
(heavy breathing)
(Grace gasps)
(Chevy grunting)
Just--just one second.
Okay.
(fapping sounds)
Huh.
And there it goes.
(laughing)
Why are you laughing?
I'm s--I'm sorry.
My--my dick
just won't get hard for you.
Maybe next time.
Maybe next time?
You should go down on me
and make me cum.
Make yourself cum.
(soft music)
(door creaks open and closed)
Stupid fucking shoe.
Fucking fuck
this fucking place!
Fuck!
-(shoe clatters)
-(Grace sighs)
Oh, my God, Grace,
go to fucking sleep!
First new message.
Hey, Grace.
I wanted to let you know
that we will not
be moving forward
with your edition
of Jagged Little Pill.
Your lack of communication
made it very frustrating
for me to work with you
as an editor.
I'm gonna forward you
an email from our lawyers
terminating your contract
and you'll need to pay back
our advance.
Thank you.
(sniffling)
(sobbing)
Grace, what's wrong?
It's 3:00 a.m. right now.
I fucking wasted my summer
on a fucking idiot!
I told you he was
the worst guy in Montreal.
(Grace weeps)
Hey, he came
to my DJ night, okay?
He's the only one who came.
Oh, shit.
How'd it go?
Grace, you treat people
like shit.
You've eaten my groceries
and borrowed my clothes
without asking.
We're not friends.
How can you say that?
What part of Quebec
am I from, Grace?
Jean de la Rivire.
No.
-I don't understand.
-I know you didn't understand.
Hey, you owe me
two months of rent!
If I don't get your half
by next week,
all this dirty ass shit
is going on Saint Urbain.
Wait, what? What?
-(birds chirping)
-(insects chirring)
Sorry, we can go soon.
I'm just--I'm--
I'm looking
for my Strokes t-shirt.
Oh, is this it?
No, no, no, don't touch that.
Oh.
Wow.
A dolphin.
(Grace laughs dryly)
Yeah, I got it at work.
Right, you reviewed it
for the column.
What'd you give it?
Um, five stars.
Yep, can I, um,
can I get it back?
-Wait.
-Okay.
What does the dolphin do?
Well, it is, um...
like a rabbit-style vibrator,
so, you, like, um,
insert it, obviously,
and, um,
the switch makes the--
yeah, the penis part
go faster
and, um,
rotates the weird beads.
(Grace laughs)
Oh, and you can also
control the dolphin
for, like, the, um,
the clitoris.
I, um...
have oral herpes,
that's why I'm celibate.
Oh, okay.
Um, how did--
how did you get it?
Um...
Uh...
Yeah,
Dated this French girl
at Concordia.
She cheated on me.
And six months later,
I went on OkCupid
and hooked up with this girl
who gave me oral herpes
right before
she went to Amsterdam.
I was like...
"Hey, thanks
for giving me herpes.
Enjoy Anne Frank's house."
(chuckles)
(vibrator whirring)
Please don't make fun of me.
I'm not gonna make fun of you.
I think having oral herpes
is, like, very punk rock.
Okay! I find it
very hard to communicate,
like, genuine thoughts
and emotions,
but, um,
I think I might have...
feelings?
We have fake conversations.
Um, I'll be
at the grocery store
wondering what
your favorite melon is.
Yeah, that's a legitimate
thought I had recently.
Or--or I'll--I'll picture us
at an all-inclusive resort
with our kids going like,
"Hey, go to the play center.
Mommy and Daddy need
their alone time."
And then, we'll drink daiquiris
and--and I'll, like,
rub suntan lotion
into your beautiful
freckled shoulders
and I will feel
just so fucking alive.
(deep inhale)
(exhaling)
(soft music)
Cantaloupe.
What?
My favorite melon
is a cantaloupe.
That's a sick melon.
I--I--I don't think
that I can date two guys
in the same band.
Things with Chevy
are just like...
(exhaling)
Chevy called you
a cum dumpster.
What?
The loft party
you didn't read at,
he called you a cum dumpster.
I'm sorry, I shouldn't
have repeated that.
It's like some gross shit
people in Alberta say.
Archie, just get
the fuck out of my room!
Okay, sorry!
Ugh.
Archie, wait.
Um...
I need my vibrator back.
Okay.
(guitar music)
(humming)
I traveled across my emotions
to find out what's right
I stared in your eyes...
Hey, it's my little
French girl!
And I started to cry
It's never a choice
when the light in your life
starts to die
So, who's the next birthday
in the family?
It's me!
Happy 49, Mom.
Shh, I'm 42 U.S.
...to the person...
Thank you.
...in my eyes
Why's the pool green?
You saw in my eyes
Remind me, oh, baby
I really appreciate
the catering work,
but I have, like, a negative
bank balance of $1,200,
and I have to pay
back my advance,
and I have to pay
my roommate back
for two months of rent.
She said she's gonna throw
my stuff out on the street.
And I feel bad for you, honey,
but your father and I
have to save money right now
for the D-I-V-O-R-C-E.
Mom, you don't
have to whisper, okay?
He's in the basement.
(sighing)
Make that pig pay you
the $4,000 he owes you.
Go to the Merge office.
Your father can drive you
to the GO station.
(clicking)
(clicking)
(sobbing)
Do you want a rock?
Sure.
Here.
Thanks.
Mission of Burma, Interpol,
fucking Primus, right?
-Gang of Four, Ween.
-Yeah.
-Ween, fucking Ween.
-Right?
You don't get Ween
without Pere Ubu.
Pere Ubu sucks.
Whoa.
Is that Grace fucking Pine?
Yeah, hi, Grace, uh...
To what do we owe the pleasure?
I need to talk to you.
Uh, yeah, well, we're just--
we're kind of
about to do a meeting
in, like, less than ten--
I need to talk to you
right now.
Yeah, okay. Uh, okay.
Uh, uh, we'll talk
in my office.
Pere Ubu does kind of suck.
I feel like they're
one of those bands
that's better live.
How's it going?
I thought we already
processed your invoice.
Well, you didn't.
Yeah, pretty sure we did.
No, you didn't.
Okay.
Um...
Hey, how's working with Phoebe?
Well, um, I...
I--I couldn't...
I couldn't write the book.
Yeah.
I--I really hope that
you're not telling people
that you, like, got me
a book deal or something
'cause, like, you're not
my mentor or my friend.
And, um, actually,
you, like, kind of exploited me
and then you treated me
like a piece of shit.
Well, no, I think
I'm pretty sure that you would
acknowledge a piece of shit
before you flushed it
down the toilet.
Oh, that's a pretty
indulgent metaphor, Grace.
Can we find something else
to say there?
Did you think it was hot,
like, you fucking me
on your desk at my job?
Like, I have cum in my hair
in the meeting?
Like, being treated
like an absolute joke?
And you know what
the worst part is?
Why the fuck are you still
wearing bootcut jeans?
Uh...
I need my check,
and I need you to reinstate
my author page on the website.
I wrote 400 articles
and some of them
have got to be worth something.
I'm talented.
I'm going to continue to write.
And I'm gonna be
very successful without you.
Uh, okay.
Uh...
I thought...
I thought this was the kink.
I thought it was hot for you.
You're the one
who called me crying,
begging me to reconsider
when I ended it.
Well, I don't think
that I did like it.
Okay, okay.
(sighing)
I'm sorry it's taken me so long
to process your invoice.
Uh...
And I'm sorry about
the other thing too.
(door opening and closing)
(soft music)
(mellow music)
(cellphone chimes)
(laughing)
Oh, yeah, Bone Patrol.
I read about these guys
in the Montreal Mirror.
That was a neat series.
Totally bipolar.
(upbeat music)
How could someone like me
scare someone like you
When you got that look
in the whole world I can do
Why do I have to prove
that daddy loves you
It's got me feeling
like Mozart's sister
Ah
Mozart's sister
Oh, my God.
Ah
Thank you for this.
This is--this is not
an excuse, um,
but you are, um,
very cool and beautiful.
So, I didn't know why
you'd wanna be my friend.
Well, you know,
I feel weird and awkward
all the time, right?
But you know about,
like, deep house,
and when you put
your hair up in a bun,
it, like, looks like that.
Yeah, that's because
I don't wash my hair.
I'm fucking depressed.
If it's okay, I think,
um, I would like to learn
how to be like, um,
like, actual friends.
Oui.
We can be actual friends.
(laughing)
...second sex famously
I'm sorry.
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fuckin' ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
(crowd cheering)
(mellow music)
Fucking love you guys!
(cheering)
(shouting)
You ever meet someone
and they scare
the shit outta you?
-Yeah!
-Hell yeah!
This song's called
"Slept in My Jeans."
(cheering)
(unintelligible)
(upbeat music)
Slept in my jeans
Oh
Oh
I slept in,
I, I slept in my jeans
(cheering)
(crunching)
(mic feedback reverberating)
-Excuse me.
-What the fuck?
(rimshot)
You okay?
Play something!
Um, Hugo, play
some fucking shit.
Jesse, let's play in C.
(lively music)
Ohh
Look at all
these beautiful faces.
Oh, yeah, beautiful.
Let's go.
(electronic music)
Oh!
-Oh, I hate shots.
-Right?
Never wanna take one again.
What's up, publicist?
Oh.
Hi.
That was a great show, right?
Yeah.
A lot of people, like, came.
Archie, though,
like, what a fucking asshole.
I just wanna say...
you did a really good job
with the whole writing thing
or whatever.
Um...
I don't know what I want,
but I do know
that I don't know.
Mm, okay, okay, um...
(Chevy clearing throat)
Was that, uh, supposed to be
like a--
like a romantic gesture?
What?
What are you trying to say?
Because I--I feel
exhausted and hurt
and confused
every time you talk to me.
Okay.
Sorry, what?
Chevy...
I'm no longer into you.
Okay?
And with all due respect,
fuck off.
(indistinct chatter)
(mellow music)
When you're
a 22-year-old music critic,
who happens to be female,
you will spend a lot of time
in a semi-circle,
standing on the periphery
of a conversation.
This formation is common
for women in the arts.
Standing next to you are six
bearded men in plaid shirts,
arguing about which
album is better:
Hsker Du's Zen Arcade
or The Minutemen's
Double Nickels on The Dime.
They're all pretending
not to look at your boobs.
You stupidly forgot
your semi-circle-camouflaging
hoodie at home
and your deep V
from American Apparel
is really wrecking the vibe
for everyone today.
Every so often
there is an opening,
a rare pause where
you're allowed to interject
with an enthusiastic nod
or a laugh.
Only once has someone
asked for your opinion
and that moment
made your heart feel
like a whole football field
of floodlights,
slowly switching on at dusk.
Validating the opinions
and tastes of men
you don't agree with
is how you've paid your rent
for the last five years.
It's how you've gotten boys
to like you.
It's how you've gained
attention from your dad
who loves Steely Dan.
These days, you cultivate
the semi-circle's tastes
like a secret garden,
having made your way
through Infinite Jest,
Neutral Milk Hotel in concert,
and all six Star Wars movies
on DVD.
Because to stand outside
the semi-circle
is to be unlikable,
unfuckable, unemployed.
It means forming
your own opinions
about what matters
and who knows
what those might even be,
right?
To be a woman who doesn't
need male approval...
...to live for yourself,
to know what kind of person
you might want to become
without constantly worrying
about what men
might think of you
seems impossible
at this moment.
At least that's
what you believe,
as a 22-year-old music critic,
who happens to be female,
standing on the periphery
of a conversation,
hoping to be let in.
(cheering, snapping)
Thank you.
(suitcase clattering)
(engine puttering)
(mellow music)
Actually...
(suitcase wheels scraping)
(grunting)
(sharp exhale)
(doorbell ringing)
Hi.
I missed my train.
Hmm.
It's big.
It's disgusting.
Can I--can I leave
my suitcase here while I wait?
Chevy's not available?
That cum dumpster? No.
Good one.
When are you leaving?
Um, I think I'm gonna take
the midnight Megabus.
Do you wanna go
on an adventure?
I have the keys
to the Bone Patrol van.
I get to go in the van?
(cars whooshing)
(indistinct chatter)
(hip-hop music)
I woke up again this morning
with the sun in my eyes
When Mike came over
with the script surprise
A mafioso story with a twist
A "To Wong Foo,
Julie Newmar" hitch
"Get your ass out of bed,"
he said,
"I'll explain it on the way"
But we did nothing,
absolutely nothing that day
And I'll say
What the hell am I doing
drinking in L.A.
at 26
With my mind on my money
and my money on my mind
-Beer, beer
-I know that life
is for the taking
So I better wise up
and take it...
All right, cross it off.
Yeah, one more time
at Trader Vic's
(clicking)
L.A.
L.A.
L.A.
You know, Toronto's
gonna be exactly the same,
except with no French people.
Yeah.
So, stay.
Learn French.
Yeah, I think I have
a few things to figure out
in Toronto first.
Hmm.
Okay, new term:
"Moving to Toronto."
It's when you get
your shit together.
Like, when I got my vape,
I really moved my weed
to Toronto.
(crackling)
(inhales)
(exhales)
(thunder rumbling)
Okay, this is
my favorite song.
(rain pattering)
(CD player whirring)
(mellow music)
Look, you think I'm unglued
I'm just studying you
You fold up all over town
Stereo-mindset
sucking you down
You're dressed up,
look what you've said
But left your insides
at home
Are you sure?
Hit me with your smile again
You might get oral herpes.
Hit me with your smile again
Disappear beneath the day
Oh, no, it's still the same
You make it hard to breathe
You make it hard to breathe
You miss everything
That's in your way
You miss everything
That's good for you
It kinda gets me down
It kinda gets me down
It kinda gets me down
Oh, my God!
Look, you think I'm unglued
I'm still studying you
You fold up all over town
Stereo-mindset
sucking you down
One, two,
one, two, three, four.
(funky music)
I'm again high
Taste it out again
Falling out the rain
I'm stuck in the sky
Tell me that I'm awake
Got me falling again
Oh, they see me
under pressure
Neither it's so easy
to give
Calling out my lover
Forever
I won't catch back to you
Who are you calling
early in the morning
I keep falling for it
Nothing else is wanted
Say hi to me baby
I could be your lady
I'll be sure to sort it
when I get home
Touch a gray form
(indistinct lyrics)
I play again
Now that I break hearts
Down on your knees
You so on me
Who listens to be...
I'm never saying
Don't bring me in
Don't bring me in
See all I can be now
I'll let you again
(indistinct lyrics)
Who are you calling
All in early morning
I keep falling for it
Nothing else is wanted
Say hi to me baby
I could be your lady
I'll be sure to sort it
when I get home
Who are you calling?
All in early morning
I keep falling for it
Nothing else is wanted
Say hi to me baby
I could be your lady
I'll be sure to sort it
when I get home
(mellow music)
I think I should stop
Connecting the dots
You know I get that a lot
Advancing the plot lines,
not
I'm caught like a moth
Attracted to loss
The wax is still soft
My wings burning off
A single look
Is always so lonely
Ambiguous sometimes
La-la-la-la laundry
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fucking ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
Locationless nights
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fucking ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
(crackling, wind howling)
(crackling, clattering)
(particles gusting)
(faint, distant banging)
(ethereal music)
(dramatic music)
(subway doors chiming)
(indistinct crowd chatter)
(cheers, applause)
(upbeat music)
(crowd screaming)
What's up, Toronto?
(cheers, applause)
We're Islands, from Montreal.
I've put on
Something you
can't switch off
I hope I don't cry
But I know I will
And you know how it feels
On the north side,
on the south side
They sing along
when you switch on
Hey!
We were wondering,
what are you writing?
Oh, I'm, like,
I'm reviewing the show.
Oh, cool!
Yeah, I'm a music critic.
Awesome.
(cheering)
Switch on
To be a fan of Islands
is to be a fan of Montreal,
a city in Quebec that's become
the most exciting place
in the world
for indie rock.
It's the city where
Arcade Fire created Funeral,
where up-and-coming artists
like Grimes and Mac DeMarco
spent $300 a month
to record albums
in their bedrooms.
As the mythos of Montreal grew,
journalists began calling it
the new Seattle.
It's dreamy
to think about a French city
full of musicians
who exist solely
on bagels and cigarettes,
all living in inexpensive,
glorious apartments
steps away from the venues
where they play epic concerts
late into the night.
Go into the city
and switch up the pity
On the train,
someone says...
And it's not even a contest.
Zen Arcade is Hsker Du's
best album by far!
It's--it's a post-hardcore
fucking masterpiece!
You're dead inside.
I personally prefer
Flip Your Wig.
Oh, said no one fucking ever
in the history of modern--
Oh, my God, you don't know
what it means to be a sellout,
because you are
a fucking sellout!
Totally.
Yeah, like their song, um,
"Double Nickels on the Dime."
-That's the Minutemen.
-Yeah.
(chuckling)
Anyway, back to you
about being a sellout.
I am not a sellout...
(indistinct arguing continues)
Amazing Grace.
I, um...
I fucking loved your Islands
article, so good.
Super, super good.
Um...did you actually
do coke with that guy?
Everybody wants to do
cocaine with me, Jeff.
Oh, of course, of course.
Why wouldn't they?
They're only human.
Yeah.
(indistinct chatter)
(envelope tears)
(funky music)
(gasps)
Ahh! Yes!
At the end of what you thought
was just a stop in the clock
(message chimes)
Found out you got older
than you thought
At the end
of what you thought of
as a great
somnambulant game
All you found
among the remains
was a few frames
(scoffs)
(tapping at keys)
On the other side
was an angel sea
On the distant shore,
it was never to be
Teeming with the thoughts
slipped out of reach
Fell away
like the sand to--
(final tap at keyboard)
(fluorescent lights hum)
(birds chirping, dog barks)
You've overpacked,
just take something out.
Mom, I did not overpack!
And now, we're gonna
miss your bus.
No, we're not.
It's okay.
I just don't understand
why you have to move
to Montreal.
You're not even French.
I'm gonna write a book
this summer.
Yeah? With what money?
Mom, you don't have
to understand everything
that I do, okay?
Sometimes,
I am just doing things.
1954 was a turning point
for Miles Davis.
Inspired by his hero,
Sugar Ray Robinson,
Davis decided it was
finally time to quit heroin.
After a touring engagement
with bebop drummer Max Roach,
Davis took--
See you later, Dad.
Oh, yeah.
Love you, Dad.
Bye!
Au revoir.
(uneasy laughter)
Oh, God.
(grunts)
-(engine starts)
-Phew!
(soft music)
Do you think I have time
to just go back in--
No, we do not.
You can buy bras,
you can buy underwear.
Okay.
Get the bag...
...out of the trunk.
(grunts)
-Thank you.
-For you. Okay.
-Goodbye, I love you so much.
-Bye! Love you.
Have a good time
in Montreal.
-Okay, I gotta go, I gotta go.
-Call me. Call me!
Okay.
-Hello.
-Hi.
(soft, indistinct chatter)
(brakes whoosh)
(bright music)
I am saved, I am saved
And oh,
would you believe it?
All of the day
I felt his presence near me
I know they won't
believe me, but
And, uh, what made you
decide to move?
Um, to get away from
certain sort of stifling
negative environments
that I had been in.
I lived in Toronto on my own
for a couple years,
just to learn
whatever it is you learn
when you're on your own,
and I grew personally,
which I think sort of
had quite a bit to do with--
with why the record is
the way that it is.
You won't regret
if you choose to believe it
Freedom, silence
always, yeah
All these darkened hallways
Oh...
Oh
Oh...
Oh
Oh...
Oh
Thank you!
Oh
Darkness always
It doesn't make much sense
Darkness always
Away from me,
calling "stay"
(engine revs)
(birds chirping)
(faint, indistinct chatter)
(grunts)
(heavy thud)
(exhales loudly)
(unzipping)
(bell faintly tolling)
Oh, my God, Mom, stop giving me
these stupid rocks.
(faint squeaking
and thumping noises)
(man and woman speaking French)
It's like this,
it's like this, right?
Right?
Oh my God, I'm not sure!
(speaking impassioned French)
Oh, shit!
(moaning)
(sighing)
Oh, fuck.
(footsteps creaking)
(lid sharply falls)
(toilet flushing)
Hi!
Hey, Madeleine.
How was the bus?
Um, long.
(Madeleine chuckles)
Yeah, this is, uh,
this is my, um...
-That's me.
-Nice, nice, nice, eh?
(awkward laughter)
Well, are you hungry?
(mellow music)
Oh, yes.
Ready!
Madeleine, this looks amazing.
I had, like, half a toaster
strudel this morning.
Um...
No.
Um, he's asking, uh,
why you moved here.
Oh. Yeah, um...
I'm trying to write a book
this summer.
-Oh!
-A 33 1/3rd,
they're like, um,
these books about records.
I still need to pitch it,
but I'm sure it's gonna happen.
Mine's about
Jagged Little Pill
by Alanis Morissette.
"Isn't it ironic,
don't you think?"
It's like rain
On your wedding day
Oh, okay.
(Hugo clears his throat)
Mm, um...do you speak French,
Grace?
-No.
-No?
No, um, I pretty much stopped
after the pizza unit
in grade five.
But I do know
all the toppings, though.
Um, there's, uh...
Um...
-Mm-hm.
-Right? Um...
Well, you're good,
you know everything.
(Madeleine laughs awkwardly)
He's just saying
that you're so funny.
-Oh, thank you.
-Mm-hm.
Thanks.
(video call ringing)
Hi, Phoebe.
Hey, how's it going, Grace?
Can you see me?
I can see you.
Uh, thanks for meeting on Skype.
It's a bummer you couldn't
come to the New York offices.
I received your book proposal
for Jagged Little Pill.
Uh, Jeff told me
to keep an eye on it.
He said you're the best
rock critic in Canada?
Cool!
So, pitch me.
Why should Jagged Little Pill
be a 33 1/3rd by Grace Pine?
Well, Alanis is a Canadian icon.
Yeah, nobody cares about that.
I just feel like...
like society hates it
when women talk
about themselves.
Anytime I have been honest
about my own experiences,
people have been, like,
"Shut the fuck up,"
like, including my own parents,
but...
Alanis was 19,
and-and she used
her life story as this, like,
weapon against the patriarchy.
And she sold 16 million
copies of her album, like,
around the world.
I-I do feel like that's
the first time in the culture
that a young woman has expressed
how fucking angry she was,
and it actually translated
to millions of dollars.
I think that's interesting...
I guess.
(soft music)
I like your take on the album.
I think it's smart.
Really?
Are you a fast writer?
Yeah, yeah, super fast.
Okay, great, 'cause we just had
this title fall through,
and there's this whole
thing with the printing,
and then,
the publishing schedule.
And trust me, it is so boring.
But what I need to know is,
can you get me a first draft
by July?
Is that doable?
-Yeah!
-Then I am pleased
to offer you a $500 advance,
and we can start
with you sending in
some chapter outlines.
(wings flapping)
(tapping at keys)
-(door opens)
-Hey, Grace.
We're just, uh, heading out
to buy some MDMA for tonight,
so, let me know
if you need anything.
Oh, I'm-I'm good,
I don't, like, "do drugs."
Well, there's a loft party
tonight at Torn Curtain.
You should come.
Hugo's band is playing, too.
Yeah, we're called Bone Patrol,
we're amazing.
(snickers)
Sounds great, but, um,
I'm on a deadline.
You should come,
because I'm gonna be DJing,
and we can, like,
dance behind the booth--
Okay, what? Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Sorry.
Kinda have to do
this thing now.
But come to Torn tonight,
do these drugs with us.
-Okay.
-Cool.
Have a--have a great drug deal!
(awkward chuckling)
And, Grace?
Dress hot.
Hm.
I'm a hustler, baby
(upbeat electronic music)
That's what
my daddy's made me
Yeah, I'm a hustler, baby
That's what
my daddy's made me
That's what they said
at my residency.
"No one makes video art
in Berlin!"
They make it, but it's shit.
Yeah, I'm a hustler, baby
That's what
my daddy's made me
(indistinct animated chatter)
If I had the money
to go to a record store,
I would
I, I would
There you are!
If I had the money
to go to a record store
(noisy kissing)
Oh!
Uh, I just, uh,
I just wanna wash my hands.
-Oh, okay.
-Thank you.
Hey, Claire,
can I have some coke?
(faint music, chatter, laughter)
(typing continues)
(soft clank)
(soft bubbling)
(gently exhales)
It's, um, it's okay,
you don't have to pretend
to look at your phone.
I also have social anxiety.
What?
No, I-I don't have
social anxiety.
Oh, I don't blame you.
Being alive is
completely insane.
(soft bubbling)
Want some weed?
No, thank you,
I don't, like, "do drugs."
(chuckling)
Actually, why not?
-Oh, huh.
-Yeah.
How do I, um, hit it?
Take a hit off that nozzle.
-Oh, okay.
-Yeah.
Do I have to press anything?
-No.
-Okay.
Just let it rip.
Oh, God, I'm scared!
(she chuckles nervously)
(soft bubbling)
(coughing)
I think I took too much.
(coughing continues)
Ooh!
Yeah, I don't have, like,
um, social anxiety.
I just...I feel uncomfortable
at a party
where I don't know anyone and,
like, everyone is on cocaine?
That's a legitimate feeling.
Thanks.
Do you, um, do know
these two French people,
Hugo and Madeleine?
They invited me.
Oh, yeah! Hugo plays drums
in my band.
Oh! You're a member
of Bone Patrol.
(he snickers)
-You've heard of us?
-Mm-hm.
Are you--are you gonna stay
for our set, or...
That depends.
What are your influences?
Mostly Big Shiny Tunes
1 through 5.
I'm Grace, by the way.
Oh, nice. I'm Archie.
Suckin' on my titties
like you wanted me
Yo! Get the fuck on stage!
Let's go!
I, uh, got to set up my axe.
Oh.
You good?
Yeah, I'm very high right now.
Sick.
Oh! Frig, sorry.
(punkish electronic music)
Oh, my God, you came!
I love this song!
Callin' me all the time
like Blondie
Check out
my Chrissy behind
It's fine all the time
What else is in...
Are you having fun?
Yeah, I smoked weed with this
guy that said he knows you,
-Archie?
-Oh yeah, yeah.
He's the only one I like
from Hugo's shitty band.
"Bone Patrol," that's
a fucking brutal band name.
(crowd cheers)
Yeah!
(cheers, applause)
You're hot!
We're Bone Patrol.
Before we start,
I-I have a very big
announcement to make, uh...
(faint crowd chatter)
Jesse, our bassist,
came out today.
He's gay!
(cheers, applause)
Dude, what the fuck?
Bone Patrol loves you,
and we support your quest
for the cock, okay?
No, but I told you--
but I told you guys this was,
like, a friend thing--
(crowd whoops)
What the fuck?
All right, this song's called
"Age, Sex, Location."
Hit it, Hugo.
(drumsticks click)
(loping alt-rock music)
I think I should stop
Connecting the dots
You know, I get that a lot
Advancing the plotlines,
not
I'm caught like a moth
Attracted to loss
But the wax is still soft
You didn't tell me
your boyfriend's band
sounds like Pavement!
What's that?
That's a band.
Always so lonely,
ambiguous--
Who's the lead singer?
Chevy?
He's the worst guy in Montreal.
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fuckin' ageless
Sexless, locationless nights
Locationless nights
You're a fucking jerk!
-Jesse.
-Okay?
I'm trying to be there
for you, dude.
I--I'm an ally.
(faint chatter)
That was a really great show.
Can I have a cigarette?
Oh! Sorry.
Thanks.
What is this? Are you gonna
help me with the van?
(indie music playing faintly)
Fuck this.
-Oh, he's mad.
-Dick.
So, what's your deal?
Uh, my deal is that I'm Grace,
and I just moved here
from Toronto.
Fuck that place.
You can't be an artist
in Toronto.
It's, like, really cool
that you can just say that.
-Say what?
-Like--
Excuse me!
Like, um,
call yourself an artist.
Uh, so, um, a few of your songs
remind me of Pavement.
No, no, we don't sound
like them.
Oh, I'm sorry, I did, uh...
who would you
compare yourself to?
Ariel Pink.
R. Stevie Moore.
Mm.
Charles Manson's solo material
is, like, a really big
influence on me.
I like music that's just,
like, unlistenable.
I think art should just
be hard to make.
-(van door slams)
-Hm.
And that's why I try to push
myself to the brink of insanity
at all times.
Yeah, I'm writing a book
this summer, so I'm, like,
pretty much alone all the time.
What's it about?
Uh, Jagged Little Pill
by Alanis Morissette?
'Kay.
I'm gonna go help Jesse
load the van
before he, like, kills himself.
-Yeah.
-See ya.
Jesse?
I'll help you.
Grab this amp, it's yours.
Hey, uh, you guys good
with the van?
No.
It's your turn.
(coughs)
Oh. Hey!
Hey!
What's up?
I think I'm gonna go home.
So. Your first lo-po.
What?
Loft party. Big step. Huge.
Yeah, but, like,
I was at a cotillion.
Like, like, I was, uh,
presented to society.
(she chuckles)
Huh.
Uh, where--where are we going?
We're, uh,
cutting across the tracks.
Feels kind of rape-y.
It's not rape-y.
(distant train whistle blares)
Sorry.
People usually cut
a bigger hole in the fence.
-Just go through that?
-Yeah.
I'm not looking
at your underwear.
Good. I stole them from my mom.
Phew!
(he grunts)
-Need help?
-No.
Okay.
(bright music)
Hey, oh--
Thank you.
(chatter in Yiddish)
Oh, my God.
I love Mile End.
Toronto doesn't have,
like, magical bagel shops
and, like,
Hasidic Jews everywhere.
What do they have?
Mostly jerks.
Oh, and condos.
Can I ask you something?
Why do French people hate me?
Mm.
It's pretty complicated.
Basically, French people
are okay if you exist.
You just can't work here
if you don't speak French.
Or, like, survive at all.
But luckily, Montreal is cheap
enough you, uh, get a grant,
or enough money from
your parents, you can stay,
so, it's like a waiting game.
People who wanna be artists
move here from Edmonton,
drop outta Concordia,
move to the Mile End,
and do drugs at loft parties
until they're forced
to get real jobs in Toronto.
Where are you from?
P.E.I.
Cute.
Chevy works here,
if you ever need Keds.
Fuckin' ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
You know, I had, like,
so much anxiety
at that party.
Oh.
Like, I just felt like
a huge loser all night.
Until we smoked weed, I guess.
Okay, I gotta teach you
my two-part system.
Oh, what's your
two-part system?
Number one: Act casual.
Ah!
Number two: Swag it out.
Hey, do you wanna, um,
like, like go inside
and, like, have sex with me?
Um...
That sounds great, but I can't.
Um, I'm celibate.
Huh. Why?
Personal reasons.
Night, Grace.
Night.
You live next door?
(chuckles)
What is that even
supposed to mean?
Double peace, bro.
All right, well, goodnight.
Or...morning.
Morning.
(relaxing music)
(city sounds)
Do they fit okay?
You wanna take a little walk
around and see what happens?
(chuckles)
Vans for the summer, classic.
Let me know if you need
any bigger sizes.
How do they fit, sweetie?
What's up?
Oh hey, I didn't
know you worked here!
Yeah, unfort'.
(upbeat music)
Do you, uh, do you
wanna try those on?
These? Yeah. Yeah, sure.
Um, size nine please.
Be right back.
Dreams are broken
Dreams are broken
Vessels on skin for you
Last pair in your size.
It's kind of rare.
It doesn't happen a lot.
I have delusion
I have delusion
Go walk.
(indistinct lyrics)
(clears throat)
That's a quality daytime shoe.
Yeah, um, they seem really,
uh, comfortable.
(indistinct lyrics)
So, um, how long have you been,
uh, a shoe salesman?
Uh...
-Too long.
-Mm.
I like to treat it like
it's an art project,
you know, shoes.
(indistinct lyrics)
So, um, how's that thing
you were talking about?
-My book?
-Yeah.
It's great!
I got a publishing deal!
It's unfounded
We're going--
Um, how's the band going, eh?
Um, got any shows coming up?
Yeah, it's good.
We have our first
EP launch in, uh, August,
um, but nothing's really
lined up.
It's...it's stupid.
Well, I'm a music critic.
I write for Spin sometimes.
Do you write for Pitchfork?
No. No, not Pitchfork.
But I am a big fan
of your work.
I could, like,
interview you sometime.
Yeah, we can do that.
Maybe this weekend.
Hey!
Could you see, um, how
much room my toes have?
I'm not supposed to touch
the customers' feet.
(exciting music)
(inhales sharply)
Does that feel good?
Yes.
(loud squeak)
Mm.
These blackberries
are so good, right?
Do I owe you any money for?
No, we can share food.
Just ask me first.
Okay.
(birds chirping)
(bells ringing)
Hey, do you ever think that
girls who date guys in bands
wanna be a guy in a band?
So it's like, don't
try to fuck Dave Grohl,
be Dave Grohl.
I don't know, do you wanna
be a musician?
No.
(laughs)
Oh, I'm interviewing
Chevy today.
Hmm.
What do you think
of this dress?
I don't know.
Think I'd show
your giant tits instead.
I...oh, um...
I don't really,
like, think of myself
as someone with giant tits.
I think of myself
as more of like, um,
like a brain in a jar.
(phone pings)
Oh my God, I'm sorry.
Maybe you guys should break up.
You think?
Text Hugo,
"You're a psychopath
and we need to break up."
But like, in French.
Can you do it maybe?
(sighs)
(fingers tap against phone)
Congrats you are
officially broken up.
(snorts)
(phone pings)
(yells)
That's my mom.
(laughs)
(distant clamoring)
(electric guitar strumming)
(exciting music)
Hey, Jesse.
Hey.
Is Chevy around?
Uh, no, those guys went out
to smoke weed,
but, uh, they'll all be back
for the Spin article.
I mean, do you want
to interview me?
Okay.
(clears throat)
Um, so how long have you
and Chevy known each other?
Um, since we were like 13.
Uh, we were in a ska band
together back in Edmonton.
A ska band? Really?
What was it called?
Um, it's called
Free Skanking Willies.
-Oh.
-It's Chevy's favorite movie.
But he always cries
at the end like a little bitch.
It's called REM, REM sleep.
Oh shit! Yo.
I was just telling Grace about,
uh, Free Skanking Willies.
FSW!
FS-dubs.
Hey, has anyone seen
my phone anywhere?
-Uh, I haven't seen it.
-You don't wanna be down there.
-Oh.
-Uh...
-Maybe you left it--
-Ooh, thank you.
-'Sup?
-'Sup?
It's really cool
you're doing this.
I didn't know
you wrote for Spin--
(cymbals crash)
The fuck, dude?
Uh, Grace, how do you
see this going, huh?
I mean, uh,
this is Bone Patrol's
first interview,
so we just all want
to be prepared, right?
-Right?
-Yeah, yeah.
Sure, yeah. Let me, um,
let me take out
my tape recorder.
All right, I think we can
just start really casual.
Maybe, um, one second...
let me get this on.
How much weed
do you guys smoke?
How much weed
don't we smoke?
"8.4! Best new interview!"
I smoke weed for, uh,
creative inspiration.
'Sup, bro.
With music, I just,
I really want to go deep
into the abyss, yeah.
And wha-and
what-what's the abyss?
I just wanna go deep, you know,
just so deep inside
that I completely disappear.
Creepy sex metaphors.
Great.
Relax.
Move your fat fucking ass
and let me check.
Yeah, I realize I hate pretty
much every aspect of music,
except recording
and production.
So, if I could be in a band
that doesn't play any shows
and only exists
on the internet,
that'd be ideal.
So, you don't wanna go on tour?
So, I can jerk off
into a toilet
of a hot dog restaurant
in Winnipeg?
You know, I actually call
masturbation, "Going on tour"
'cause they're pretty
much the same thing.
Come on, dude!
All right, can we go back
to the interview now?
N-none of that is going in.
Hey, are you okay, homie?
I'm fine, I just...
(overlapping voices)
Can I, can I talk to you, Arch?
Yeah.
Okay.
I just, I dunno why you're
talking all that shit
in front of Spin.
Unless that's how
you truly feel.
I know you think of yourself
as like this intense rock star,
but we sell Keds, bro.
I'm--We're not gonna,
like, "make it."
This band's gonna break
up in five years
and we'll all have to
get day jobs in Toronto,
probably in cybersecurity.
Aha! I found it, guys.
All right, I am ready.
What the fuck?
What?
Madeline just broke up with me.
Over text?
Haven't you guys been
together for, like, five years?
What the fuck is this?
It's in French.
No, she said,
"Je vous breakup."
It doesn't even sound like her.
So sorry, dude.
No, what the fuck, man?
No I can't, I can't.
Can you turn that off, please?
Oh yeah, sorry.
And all I really want
Is some patience
A way to calm
the angry voice
And all I really want
Is deliverance
(vocalizations)
Whoa!
Oh my God, oh my God!
I'm sorry.
Oh my God, you scared me!
Sorry. How was your date?
Uh, well, it was not a date,
the whole band was there.
Ah. Okay well,
did you see Hugo?
Yeah.
Oh my God.
(breathes heavily)
I can't be alone right now.
Hey, will you come with me
to this, uh, poetry reading?
It's near some
abandoned malting silo.
That actually
sounds really cool.
But I-I can't,
I gotta work on my Alanis--
Hi! Hi, everyone.
Hi, I'm Chlo.
And welcome
to the inaugural edition of,
"There Is No Such Thing
As A Safe Space."
(cheers)
(snaps)
To start off the event,
Laura Malta.
(cheers, snapping)
(pensive music)
Hey.
I stared at my lover.
Early, he said he was tired.
"Laura, I'm tired."
Of course, I heard,
"Laura, I'm tired of you."
To which I replied,
"Okay, I'm going
to see the cows."
We used to kiss like flowers.
We used to text for hours.
You shifted my molecules.
Now they're string cheese.
My fingers smelled like
oranges all winter.
But right before
the dream leaves,
I notice my skin
is actually rind
and everywhere,
there is zest.
Bonjour. Hi, I'm Guillaume.
Last night, I dreamt
I was a Starbucks cup.
Way too hot.
And bitter.
Then, a 15-year-old barista
threw me in the trash.
(laughs)
Some of the poets last night
just, honestly,
like,
we're not up to par, like--
-Hey.
-Hey.
I like what you read.
Ugh, let's go looking
for chacos.
Thanks.
I-I've never really been
to anything like this.
It's so cool everyone just
reads off their phones.
I-I'm a writer too.
Do you write poetry?
I'm more of, um,
a music critic.
Cool! Talk to Chlo!
I'm sure you could get in
on the next one.
Really?
Like I, like, read something?
-Yeah!
-Oh, I don't know.
Yeah! No, it's not a big deal.
What was that remix you were
working on this morning?
Um, you're not
supposed to hear!
-It's not done.
-It was so good.
I read your text.
Halo!
Excusez moi.
Sour Patch Kids?
Huh?
-Oh.
-Ah.
Debits?
(machine beeps)
One sec, sorry.
(machine beeps)
(distant music)
(machine dings)
What's up?
I-It's saying
I don't have any money.
Well, did you already spend
the advance?
The $500?! Yes!
Well, I'm not the one who moved
to another province
with no money!
You always wanna do
these big things,
but you can't do
everything in life--
Oh my God, Mom, just gimme
the thousand dollars!
That's all I fucking need!
I'm still waiting
for the check from Merge.
It's been four months!
They owe me $4,000!
Well then,
you need to get on Jeff!
Mom, I sent him the invoice.
He never responded!
Well, if someone
owed me $4,000,
I wouldn't be in Montreal
putzing around!
Oh my God.
(keyboard clacking)
(pensive music)
There goes your corpse again
Oh, yeah
Talking
with your new girlfriend
Oh, yeah
What you think that he said
You're better off dead
Oh, yeah, come
Oh, yeah
Come the last days of June
Oh, yeah
Will he go back to his tomb
(breathes heavily)
(moans)
(breath hitches)
(desk shaking)
(groans)
(breathes heavily)
Is that what you want?
Uh, I love that you wanna
get caught. Heh.
Great sex.
Yeah? All right.
(lights buzzing)
Easy
Easy
My man and me
(melancholic music)
We could rest
And remain here
Easily
(cries)
We are tested
and pained
By what's beyond
our bed
We are blessed
and sustained
By what is not said
No one knows what is coming
Or who will harvest
what we have sown
Or how I've been dulling
and dumbing
In the service
of the heart--
(computer pings)
(crickets chirp)
(sighs deeply)
(sighs)
(sighs)
(keyboard clacking)
When people talk about Alanis,
they mostly talk about
how angry she seemed.
But a large part of being female
is feeling angry
and insignificant
for most of your waking hours.
(somber music)
Alanis' Catholic upbringing
and pre-teen sexualization
at her most vulnerable age
was a Molotov cocktail,
heavy on the repression.
And when Alanis wasn't cutting
ribbons at mall openings
in the Ottawa Valley,
competing in talent shows,
or developing
a serious eating disorder,
due to pressure
from her label
who wanted her to compete
with the Tiffanys
and Madonnas of her era,
she felt guilty.
Like a lot of women,
it was for the things
she didn't even do.
(soft music)
I'm broke, but I'm happy
I'm poor, but I'm kind
I'm short, but I'm healthy
Yeah
I'm high, but I'm grounded
I'm sane, but I'm--
Hi, Phoebe.
Hey Grace, on a whole,
I think we're moving
in the right direction.
Your first chapter is great.
Okay.
But I think I need more
of your voice.
You know, what drew
me into your pitch
was how personal
Alanis is for you.
And right now,
sometimes, it's reading
like her Wikipedia page.
You could go deeper.
Anyway, I'm being
pulled into a meeting.
But you got this, okay? Bye!
And the other's givin'
a high-five
I feel drunk
but I'm sober
I'm young
and I'm underpaid
I'm tired
but I'm working--
(music distorts)
(breathes out)
(pensive music)
(keyboard clacks)
(intense music)
(laptop dings)
(birds chirp)
(gentle rock music)
Bone Patrol's debut EP
smacks of bro-dom.
Not the kind of bro
who wears Livestrong bracelets
and is currently taking
women's studies classes
to pick up chicks,
but the true bro,
the eternal bro,
the bro most loyal and kind.
Maybe even
your real-life bro
who taught you how to play
the baseline to Nirvana's
"Come As You Are"
and offered up his couch
as a landing spot
well until your late twenties.
With four sublime rock songs
that rarely exceed
the 4:20 mark,
the Montreal four piece--
comprised
of Archie Webber,
lead guitar,
Chevy Olsen, vocals,
Hugo Ct, drums,
and Jesse Matthews, bass--
wear their '90s indie rock
influences of Pavement
and Built to Spill
on the sleeves of their
beer-soaked hoodies.
La, la, la, la, la
But Bone Patrol ain't heavy.
(indistinct lyrics)
They're your bros.
Life
Fucking ageless
Sexless
locationless night
(pensive music)
Hey.
Hey.
Do you wanna go
for a beer or something?
Get off in like 20.
-Cool.
-Sick bio.
You write good.
(excited music)
(alarm beeps)
(alarm beeps)
Here you go.
Cheers.
(alarm beeps)
(alarm beeps)
(clears throat)
Uh...
(alarm beeps)
Sounds like something's,
uh, going off or something.
Oh yeah, yeah, that's the,
that's the carbon monoxide
detector or whatever.
It's fine.
You should probably
check that out.
Yeah.
(alarm beeps)
(alarm beeps)
(chuckles)
(moans)
One second, one second.
(sensual music)
Hey, mama, I wanna--
Is that R. Stevie Moore?
Mhm.
Love you
I love this song.
Do you feel about the same?
Hey, woman,
I wanna say that I need
You don't realize
what I have done, dear
You don't understand
that I'm the one, dear
Do you want me
to take my top off?
M-Maybe not?
You're good
to just kiss though.
D-Do you wanna, like,
touch my boobs or something?
It could be like really...
Okay.
(chuckles nervously)
Sick.
(chuckles)
(moans)
I-I just had this...
like, this--this fight...
(sighs)
...with this--
with my friend,
and I think she, like,
kind of, like,
wanted like, like,
a relationship.
And I'm just like...
...not good with serious shit,
you know?
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
I mean, it's always
an issue, you know?
'Cause I make music and...
...I can't get distracted.
Ever.
Absolutely.
Yeah, so, I feel like
we should just sort of
keep our whatever
kind of professional,
you know?
'Cause you're, like,
an important contact...
...in the industry.
I need to lie down.
(soft music)
Do you wanna take
your jeans off?
You would probably
be more comfortable.
No.
You feel really good.
This is good.
Archie!
(mellow music)
Oh, wazzup!
Wazzup!
(chuckles)
Hello.
Thank you.
(indistinct chatter)
(can pops open)
Um, do you ever, uh,
feel like a fuck-up?
Yeah, that's why I live here.
Why, you feel like a fuck-up?
I wrote a list of
goals for the summer
and I'm blowing it bad.
Can I see it?
It's pretty personal.
Even better.
Okay.
(soft music)
"Goals for summer in Montreal."
Okay, first of all,
great title.
Fuck off.
"Number one, write Alanis book.
Number two, learn French.
Number three, climb to the top
of the mountain.
Number four, have actual sex."
"Number five, fall in love."
How's all this going?
I can probably help.
Obviously not with number four.
Or number five 'cause I
don't believe in love, but...
Oh, sorry,
you don't believe in love?
I really, really don't.
Why?
Personal reasons.
What's up, Archie?
Wazzup.
Wazzup!
You two know each other?
This is Mile End,
there's like 75 people here.
Hey, I spoke to Chloe.
She put you on the list
for the next reading.
Oh my God, really?
It's part of this loft party
at Torn Curtain.
TOPS, Dishwasher, and Chevy
are gonna be playing too.
That's great! You can read
from your Alanis book.
Oh, yeah, yeah,
I gotta write that.
(webcam chiming)
("shutter" clicks)
(webcam chiming)
("shutter" clicks)
You can't turn
your love around
(email notification)
Every time I go outside
I feel the light
It hurts my eyes
-You can't turn your love
-(Grace squeals)
Hey.
(Madeleine hums)
(container opens)
How's your day?
It was good.
I just went grocery shopping.
How was yours?
It's good.
I got Bone Patrol interview.
I'm their publicist now.
Whatcha tryin' to say
Aren't you supposed
to write a book?
I can do both.
Back down, back down
Oh!
(paper rustling)
Ta-da!
I'm gonna have
my own DJ night,
and I'm gonna only play music
I love made by women.
And the best part
is that it starts
on the first day
of my period!
My God, Madeleine,
this is amazing!
Beyonc with a tampon!
-I know! Ha!
-That's sick.
(laughs)
Hey, uh...
when are you gonna pay me
for, uh, July's rent?
(insects chirring)
It's been over a week now,
so...
(chirring intensifies)
(fan humming)
(soft, tense music)
(sighs)
(laptop notification)
(energetic music)
(phone chimes)
(soft music)
Hoo!
Wow!
This is beautiful!
Hey, sick, man!
Oh, my gosh!
It's whatever.
Take a seat.
(strums guitar)
(clears throat)
-You recording?
-Yeah.
Okay, this is off my, uh,
solo thing
that I've been working on.
I don't know, it's whatever.
It's stupid.
It's called
"Korean Supermarket."
(sunglasses clatter)
(mellow guitar music)
Korean supermarket
I got a nice whip,
I gotta park it
Gochujang is
my favorite thing
at the Korean supermarket
The entrance,
it's got a big red carpet
Cashier is kind
but sincere
And I'm hopin',
hopin', hopin'
that I got enough
in my pocket
Down 'cause I'm broke up
on good coke
And I need to go to the...
Korean supermarket
Supermarket, supermarket
Supermarket,
supermarket
Supermarket
So many choices,
you gotta love it
At the Korean supermarket
I love
-That was pretty shit, but...
-(clapping)
That was amazing!
Thanks.
Um, we should totally
have sex here sometimes.
I love getting caught.
(sighs)
Can you...
can you just be chill?
I'm chill.
No, you're--you're not--
you're not chill.
(Chevy sighs)
You need to calm down.
You're not very chill, Grace.
You gotta calm your farm.
Oh, take a chill pill
Take a chill,
chill pill
Take a chill pill,
chill, chill, chill
(crunching)
Hey, stop eating my bread!
I'm--I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to.
Also, you owe me
two months of rent.
So, when are you gonna pay?
No, yeah, no, I, um...
Honestly, I just--
I have, um...
I have a negative
bank balance of $700.
But I have this big check
coming in from my old job.
And I swear,
as soon as I get it,
I will pay you back!
Just gimme the money
as soon as you can.
I will!
Yes, of course, I will!
(sighs)
What are you--
what are you up to tonight?
There's, um,
this loft party at Torn
that you should come to.
Yeah.
I'm reading something.
You know, I can't tonight
'cause my DJ night is tonight.
Fuck! It's tonight?
You're not coming to my night?
Madeleine, of course
I'm coming to your night.
It's gonna be amazing!
I'll come right after I read.
First new message.
Hey Grace, Phoebe here.
What's going on
with your draft?
You stopped answering my emails.
(mellow music)
So, who was
your first girlfriend?
Oh, um, I was 14,
but it wasn't like
a typical relationship
'cause, um, she's older.
Oh, how much older?
I was in grade nine,
she was in grade twelve.
But it's, like, cool.
It was cool that,
like, it happened.
It's just,
it got really complicated
when she went to college.
Mm.
(Archie sighs)
-Shannon.
-Shannon.
Are you excited
to read from your book?
Yeah, I think
that writing is hard
and that no one should do it.
(laughs)
Yeah, how long did
you write for, um,
that magazine for,
what was it called?
-Merch?
-Yeah.
About a year.
It's weird though, I--
I went on the website
last night
and all my articles are gone.
What the fuck?
Yeah, so there's like
400 articles that I wrote
that no one can read.
You wrote 400 articles
in a year?
Yeah, some, like,
investigative features,
cultural criticism,
political reporting.
And I used to write
about sex toys.
For the music magazine?
Yeah, the magazine decided
to fire the sex columnist
and my boss asked me
to write a column
where I reviewed
sex toys every week.
Yeah.
I, um, I also used
to have sex with my boss.
Oh.
Yeah, um,
but it's not like I, like,
loved it or anything.
I just kind of felt like
since I agreed to do the column
that I kind of brought it
on to myself.
I'm sorry, I just--
I don't know why
I'm--I'm telling you this.
I just feel like
maybe that's just--
No, I'm sorry
that it happened.
It just sounds really shitty.
I...
I guess we've both
been with people
who are older than us.
Well, I'm totally over it
now, so...
(dance music)
Uh-oh. I'd say Torn Curtain's
got a three-week loft span.
(Grace laughs)
How do you know?
I've seen a lot of lofts
come and go in my time.
When some space
in a warehouse becomes cool,
then McGill students find out.
Next, the police come
and arrest everyone.
-Oh!
-Ew.
Fuck me.
(indistinct chatter)
Oh, shit.
I printed out my story.
Do you think that I should be
reading it off my phone instead?
Nobody cares.
What?
You just graduated
to the third part
of my two-part system.
Act casual, swag it out,
nobody cares.
Nobody cares, Grace.
Everybody here
is just, like,
literally thinking
about themselves.
Wow, that is terrible advice.
You got my text?
Oh. Yeah, congrats.
Hey, that was a massive dump.
-Hey, Chevy.
-No.
No, not that one.
Uh...
The one about Jesse
possibly getting a bedbug
from his Grindr date.
Yeah, it's great
that he got on that.
-Hey.
-Grace!
(indistinct chatter)
(Archie sighs)
What's up with you
and the publicist, huh?
What, do you mean Grace?
Yeah.
We're friends.
Friends who like to fuck?
What?
Look, dude...
...she's a cum dumpster.
Hmm.
I just...
I gotta pee.
So, when do you go on?
Oh, thank you.
Well, they said
because I'm from Toronto,
that, um, I should
be the headliner.
Nice! You're like the Bono
of this loft party.
Yeah, and you're like The Edge.
(Archie chuckles)
Yeah, I'm pretty scared to read.
Hello, hi.
Wow, welcome back.
Thanks for being present.
Next up is, uh,
Chevy from Bones Patrol.
(cheering)
It's just...
it's just "Chevy."
Uh, this one is, uh, new.
(cheering)
-(button clicks)
-(intense music)
(cheering)
Don't look at me
(cheering)
Quit it
Stop
Oh
(energetic music)
Ah
(cheering)
I slept in my jeans
Dark hair
You over there
In the shadows
You're my shadow
Why do I wake up
seeing you next to me
(cheering)
By the time
you open your eyes
(indistinct lyrics)
Grab your thigh,
move your body next to me
Oh
Last time you open your eyes...
...I'm gone.
(laughs)
(screaming)
Why do I wake up
(indistinct lyrics)
(groaning)
Yeah!
I just wanna be loved
I just wanna be heard
I want it all, Montral.
I want all of you.
Good night.
(cheering)
(indistinct lyrics)
(mellow music)
Like we did on that day
Let's dream again
You're on after this.
Do you know how you
wanna be introduced?
(indistinct lyrics)
Think I'm gonna go
smoke a cigarette.
(indistinct chatter)
Do you see me?
Do I even exist to you?
Uh...
Yeah.
Yeah, it's just--
it's, like, confusing.
What is confusing?
I wanna see you, I do.
I...
I just...
I don't even know if I can be
in my own body right now.
Are all your songs about me?
No.
They're about me.
Hey, uh,
they, uh,
they called your name.
Oh, well, I don't--
I don't think I'm gonna read.
-Hey, Archie.
-Hi, Chevy.
Look, whatever you read
is gonna be
just another little part
of everyone's
meaningless lives.
But for you, this could
be a really big part.
Look, I think--
I think whether you read
at this loft party
is, like, a defining moment.
Hey, I have, like,
one beer at my house.
Um...
Yeah.
I think I'm gonna leave, okay?
Thank you so much
for coming with me.
Have a good night.
Wait!
Wazzup?
(indistinct chatter)
Ow! I mean the word
overrated is overrated.
I guess.
Hey, Jesse!
-Yo.
-What's up roomie?
Yo, yo, yo.
I didn't know
you guys were roommates.
Yeah, yeah,
when Chevy brings girls over,
I sleep in the van.
How's the puzzle going?
It's going good.
It looks good.
So, we want, like,
the purple ones up here.
Hey, Chevy,
are we having a beer?
Yeah.
-Cool.
-Now?
-Yeah.
-Yeah, yeah.
Bye, Jesse.
Bye.
Whoa.
(bags rustling)
What happened here?
Fucking Jesse
found a bedbug
when he came back
from his Grindr date.
Huh, it's good
that he's on that.
For sure, it's really good.
Anyways, we're supposed
to put all our shit into bags
to smother the bugs.
Whoa, oh!
Do you have bedbugs?
Trust me, I don't.
"All bedbugs mate
by traumatic insemination.
Female bedbugs possess
a reproductive tract
that functions
during oviposition,
but the male
does not use this tract
for sperm insemination.
Instead, the male pierces
the female's abdomen
with his hypodermic penis
and ejaculates
into the body cavity."
(beads rattle)
(heavy breathing)
(Grace gasps)
(Chevy grunting)
Just--just one second.
Okay.
(fapping sounds)
Huh.
And there it goes.
(laughing)
Why are you laughing?
I'm s--I'm sorry.
My--my dick
just won't get hard for you.
Maybe next time.
Maybe next time?
You should go down on me
and make me cum.
Make yourself cum.
(soft music)
(door creaks open and closed)
Stupid fucking shoe.
Fucking fuck
this fucking place!
Fuck!
-(shoe clatters)
-(Grace sighs)
Oh, my God, Grace,
go to fucking sleep!
First new message.
Hey, Grace.
I wanted to let you know
that we will not
be moving forward
with your edition
of Jagged Little Pill.
Your lack of communication
made it very frustrating
for me to work with you
as an editor.
I'm gonna forward you
an email from our lawyers
terminating your contract
and you'll need to pay back
our advance.
Thank you.
(sniffling)
(sobbing)
Grace, what's wrong?
It's 3:00 a.m. right now.
I fucking wasted my summer
on a fucking idiot!
I told you he was
the worst guy in Montreal.
(Grace weeps)
Hey, he came
to my DJ night, okay?
He's the only one who came.
Oh, shit.
How'd it go?
Grace, you treat people
like shit.
You've eaten my groceries
and borrowed my clothes
without asking.
We're not friends.
How can you say that?
What part of Quebec
am I from, Grace?
Jean de la Rivire.
No.
-I don't understand.
-I know you didn't understand.
Hey, you owe me
two months of rent!
If I don't get your half
by next week,
all this dirty ass shit
is going on Saint Urbain.
Wait, what? What?
-(birds chirping)
-(insects chirring)
Sorry, we can go soon.
I'm just--I'm--
I'm looking
for my Strokes t-shirt.
Oh, is this it?
No, no, no, don't touch that.
Oh.
Wow.
A dolphin.
(Grace laughs dryly)
Yeah, I got it at work.
Right, you reviewed it
for the column.
What'd you give it?
Um, five stars.
Yep, can I, um,
can I get it back?
-Wait.
-Okay.
What does the dolphin do?
Well, it is, um...
like a rabbit-style vibrator,
so, you, like, um,
insert it, obviously,
and, um,
the switch makes the--
yeah, the penis part
go faster
and, um,
rotates the weird beads.
(Grace laughs)
Oh, and you can also
control the dolphin
for, like, the, um,
the clitoris.
I, um...
have oral herpes,
that's why I'm celibate.
Oh, okay.
Um, how did--
how did you get it?
Um...
Uh...
Yeah,
Dated this French girl
at Concordia.
She cheated on me.
And six months later,
I went on OkCupid
and hooked up with this girl
who gave me oral herpes
right before
she went to Amsterdam.
I was like...
"Hey, thanks
for giving me herpes.
Enjoy Anne Frank's house."
(chuckles)
(vibrator whirring)
Please don't make fun of me.
I'm not gonna make fun of you.
I think having oral herpes
is, like, very punk rock.
Okay! I find it
very hard to communicate,
like, genuine thoughts
and emotions,
but, um,
I think I might have...
feelings?
We have fake conversations.
Um, I'll be
at the grocery store
wondering what
your favorite melon is.
Yeah, that's a legitimate
thought I had recently.
Or--or I'll--I'll picture us
at an all-inclusive resort
with our kids going like,
"Hey, go to the play center.
Mommy and Daddy need
their alone time."
And then, we'll drink daiquiris
and--and I'll, like,
rub suntan lotion
into your beautiful
freckled shoulders
and I will feel
just so fucking alive.
(deep inhale)
(exhaling)
(soft music)
Cantaloupe.
What?
My favorite melon
is a cantaloupe.
That's a sick melon.
I--I--I don't think
that I can date two guys
in the same band.
Things with Chevy
are just like...
(exhaling)
Chevy called you
a cum dumpster.
What?
The loft party
you didn't read at,
he called you a cum dumpster.
I'm sorry, I shouldn't
have repeated that.
It's like some gross shit
people in Alberta say.
Archie, just get
the fuck out of my room!
Okay, sorry!
Ugh.
Archie, wait.
Um...
I need my vibrator back.
Okay.
(guitar music)
(humming)
I traveled across my emotions
to find out what's right
I stared in your eyes...
Hey, it's my little
French girl!
And I started to cry
It's never a choice
when the light in your life
starts to die
So, who's the next birthday
in the family?
It's me!
Happy 49, Mom.
Shh, I'm 42 U.S.
...to the person...
Thank you.
...in my eyes
Why's the pool green?
You saw in my eyes
Remind me, oh, baby
I really appreciate
the catering work,
but I have, like, a negative
bank balance of $1,200,
and I have to pay
back my advance,
and I have to pay
my roommate back
for two months of rent.
She said she's gonna throw
my stuff out on the street.
And I feel bad for you, honey,
but your father and I
have to save money right now
for the D-I-V-O-R-C-E.
Mom, you don't
have to whisper, okay?
He's in the basement.
(sighing)
Make that pig pay you
the $4,000 he owes you.
Go to the Merge office.
Your father can drive you
to the GO station.
(clicking)
(clicking)
(sobbing)
Do you want a rock?
Sure.
Here.
Thanks.
Mission of Burma, Interpol,
fucking Primus, right?
-Gang of Four, Ween.
-Yeah.
-Ween, fucking Ween.
-Right?
You don't get Ween
without Pere Ubu.
Pere Ubu sucks.
Whoa.
Is that Grace fucking Pine?
Yeah, hi, Grace, uh...
To what do we owe the pleasure?
I need to talk to you.
Uh, yeah, well, we're just--
we're kind of
about to do a meeting
in, like, less than ten--
I need to talk to you
right now.
Yeah, okay. Uh, okay.
Uh, uh, we'll talk
in my office.
Pere Ubu does kind of suck.
I feel like they're
one of those bands
that's better live.
How's it going?
I thought we already
processed your invoice.
Well, you didn't.
Yeah, pretty sure we did.
No, you didn't.
Okay.
Um...
Hey, how's working with Phoebe?
Well, um, I...
I--I couldn't...
I couldn't write the book.
Yeah.
I--I really hope that
you're not telling people
that you, like, got me
a book deal or something
'cause, like, you're not
my mentor or my friend.
And, um, actually,
you, like, kind of exploited me
and then you treated me
like a piece of shit.
Well, no, I think
I'm pretty sure that you would
acknowledge a piece of shit
before you flushed it
down the toilet.
Oh, that's a pretty
indulgent metaphor, Grace.
Can we find something else
to say there?
Did you think it was hot,
like, you fucking me
on your desk at my job?
Like, I have cum in my hair
in the meeting?
Like, being treated
like an absolute joke?
And you know what
the worst part is?
Why the fuck are you still
wearing bootcut jeans?
Uh...
I need my check,
and I need you to reinstate
my author page on the website.
I wrote 400 articles
and some of them
have got to be worth something.
I'm talented.
I'm going to continue to write.
And I'm gonna be
very successful without you.
Uh, okay.
Uh...
I thought...
I thought this was the kink.
I thought it was hot for you.
You're the one
who called me crying,
begging me to reconsider
when I ended it.
Well, I don't think
that I did like it.
Okay, okay.
(sighing)
I'm sorry it's taken me so long
to process your invoice.
Uh...
And I'm sorry about
the other thing too.
(door opening and closing)
(soft music)
(mellow music)
(cellphone chimes)
(laughing)
Oh, yeah, Bone Patrol.
I read about these guys
in the Montreal Mirror.
That was a neat series.
Totally bipolar.
(upbeat music)
How could someone like me
scare someone like you
When you got that look
in the whole world I can do
Why do I have to prove
that daddy loves you
It's got me feeling
like Mozart's sister
Ah
Mozart's sister
Oh, my God.
Ah
Thank you for this.
This is--this is not
an excuse, um,
but you are, um,
very cool and beautiful.
So, I didn't know why
you'd wanna be my friend.
Well, you know,
I feel weird and awkward
all the time, right?
But you know about,
like, deep house,
and when you put
your hair up in a bun,
it, like, looks like that.
Yeah, that's because
I don't wash my hair.
I'm fucking depressed.
If it's okay, I think,
um, I would like to learn
how to be like, um,
like, actual friends.
Oui.
We can be actual friends.
(laughing)
...second sex famously
I'm sorry.
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fuckin' ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
(crowd cheering)
(mellow music)
Fucking love you guys!
(cheering)
(shouting)
You ever meet someone
and they scare
the shit outta you?
-Yeah!
-Hell yeah!
This song's called
"Slept in My Jeans."
(cheering)
(unintelligible)
(upbeat music)
Slept in my jeans
Oh
Oh
I slept in,
I, I slept in my jeans
(cheering)
(crunching)
(mic feedback reverberating)
-Excuse me.
-What the fuck?
(rimshot)
You okay?
Play something!
Um, Hugo, play
some fucking shit.
Jesse, let's play in C.
(lively music)
Ohh
Look at all
these beautiful faces.
Oh, yeah, beautiful.
Let's go.
(electronic music)
Oh!
-Oh, I hate shots.
-Right?
Never wanna take one again.
What's up, publicist?
Oh.
Hi.
That was a great show, right?
Yeah.
A lot of people, like, came.
Archie, though,
like, what a fucking asshole.
I just wanna say...
you did a really good job
with the whole writing thing
or whatever.
Um...
I don't know what I want,
but I do know
that I don't know.
Mm, okay, okay, um...
(Chevy clearing throat)
Was that, uh, supposed to be
like a--
like a romantic gesture?
What?
What are you trying to say?
Because I--I feel
exhausted and hurt
and confused
every time you talk to me.
Okay.
Sorry, what?
Chevy...
I'm no longer into you.
Okay?
And with all due respect,
fuck off.
(indistinct chatter)
(mellow music)
When you're
a 22-year-old music critic,
who happens to be female,
you will spend a lot of time
in a semi-circle,
standing on the periphery
of a conversation.
This formation is common
for women in the arts.
Standing next to you are six
bearded men in plaid shirts,
arguing about which
album is better:
Hsker Du's Zen Arcade
or The Minutemen's
Double Nickels on The Dime.
They're all pretending
not to look at your boobs.
You stupidly forgot
your semi-circle-camouflaging
hoodie at home
and your deep V
from American Apparel
is really wrecking the vibe
for everyone today.
Every so often
there is an opening,
a rare pause where
you're allowed to interject
with an enthusiastic nod
or a laugh.
Only once has someone
asked for your opinion
and that moment
made your heart feel
like a whole football field
of floodlights,
slowly switching on at dusk.
Validating the opinions
and tastes of men
you don't agree with
is how you've paid your rent
for the last five years.
It's how you've gotten boys
to like you.
It's how you've gained
attention from your dad
who loves Steely Dan.
These days, you cultivate
the semi-circle's tastes
like a secret garden,
having made your way
through Infinite Jest,
Neutral Milk Hotel in concert,
and all six Star Wars movies
on DVD.
Because to stand outside
the semi-circle
is to be unlikable,
unfuckable, unemployed.
It means forming
your own opinions
about what matters
and who knows
what those might even be,
right?
To be a woman who doesn't
need male approval...
...to live for yourself,
to know what kind of person
you might want to become
without constantly worrying
about what men
might think of you
seems impossible
at this moment.
At least that's
what you believe,
as a 22-year-old music critic,
who happens to be female,
standing on the periphery
of a conversation,
hoping to be let in.
(cheering, snapping)
Thank you.
(suitcase clattering)
(engine puttering)
(mellow music)
Actually...
(suitcase wheels scraping)
(grunting)
(sharp exhale)
(doorbell ringing)
Hi.
I missed my train.
Hmm.
It's big.
It's disgusting.
Can I--can I leave
my suitcase here while I wait?
Chevy's not available?
That cum dumpster? No.
Good one.
When are you leaving?
Um, I think I'm gonna take
the midnight Megabus.
Do you wanna go
on an adventure?
I have the keys
to the Bone Patrol van.
I get to go in the van?
(cars whooshing)
(indistinct chatter)
(hip-hop music)
I woke up again this morning
with the sun in my eyes
When Mike came over
with the script surprise
A mafioso story with a twist
A "To Wong Foo,
Julie Newmar" hitch
"Get your ass out of bed,"
he said,
"I'll explain it on the way"
But we did nothing,
absolutely nothing that day
And I'll say
What the hell am I doing
drinking in L.A.
at 26
With my mind on my money
and my money on my mind
-Beer, beer
-I know that life
is for the taking
So I better wise up
and take it...
All right, cross it off.
Yeah, one more time
at Trader Vic's
(clicking)
L.A.
L.A.
L.A.
You know, Toronto's
gonna be exactly the same,
except with no French people.
Yeah.
So, stay.
Learn French.
Yeah, I think I have
a few things to figure out
in Toronto first.
Hmm.
Okay, new term:
"Moving to Toronto."
It's when you get
your shit together.
Like, when I got my vape,
I really moved my weed
to Toronto.
(crackling)
(inhales)
(exhales)
(thunder rumbling)
Okay, this is
my favorite song.
(rain pattering)
(CD player whirring)
(mellow music)
Look, you think I'm unglued
I'm just studying you
You fold up all over town
Stereo-mindset
sucking you down
You're dressed up,
look what you've said
But left your insides
at home
Are you sure?
Hit me with your smile again
You might get oral herpes.
Hit me with your smile again
Disappear beneath the day
Oh, no, it's still the same
You make it hard to breathe
You make it hard to breathe
You miss everything
That's in your way
You miss everything
That's good for you
It kinda gets me down
It kinda gets me down
It kinda gets me down
Oh, my God!
Look, you think I'm unglued
I'm still studying you
You fold up all over town
Stereo-mindset
sucking you down
One, two,
one, two, three, four.
(funky music)
I'm again high
Taste it out again
Falling out the rain
I'm stuck in the sky
Tell me that I'm awake
Got me falling again
Oh, they see me
under pressure
Neither it's so easy
to give
Calling out my lover
Forever
I won't catch back to you
Who are you calling
early in the morning
I keep falling for it
Nothing else is wanted
Say hi to me baby
I could be your lady
I'll be sure to sort it
when I get home
Touch a gray form
(indistinct lyrics)
I play again
Now that I break hearts
Down on your knees
You so on me
Who listens to be...
I'm never saying
Don't bring me in
Don't bring me in
See all I can be now
I'll let you again
(indistinct lyrics)
Who are you calling
All in early morning
I keep falling for it
Nothing else is wanted
Say hi to me baby
I could be your lady
I'll be sure to sort it
when I get home
Who are you calling?
All in early morning
I keep falling for it
Nothing else is wanted
Say hi to me baby
I could be your lady
I'll be sure to sort it
when I get home
(mellow music)
I think I should stop
Connecting the dots
You know I get that a lot
Advancing the plot lines,
not
I'm caught like a moth
Attracted to loss
The wax is still soft
My wings burning off
A single look
Is always so lonely
Ambiguous sometimes
La-la-la-la laundry
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fucking ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
Locationless nights
Awash sunset lies
In an always sorry life
Fucking ageless
Sexless,
locationless nights
(crackling, wind howling)
(crackling, clattering)