Miss Me This Christmas (2017) Movie Script

1
I love Christmas.
Always have.
And I loved that Christmas was
just as much about giving as
receiving.
That's me, Gina Gina.
Even recorded a Christmas song,
became a huge hit.
You remember,
"Where My Santa At?"
It was fate that Franklin and I
were married on Christmas Day.
Christmas was always special to
me, but that beautiful day at
the Chesterton Hotel, it became
special to both of us.
We always said "No challenge",
big or small, will stop us.
We'll work through them all.
"Together."
We both started crushing it
in our careers in the music
industry.
So you trade in the hustle of
the concrete jungle for room to
breathe, something new, and
hopefully better.
Hopefully...
[ Sighs ]
All right, brother.
Have a good one.
All right, brother. Have a good one.
You, too.
Hey, babe. What are you doing up?
I was waiting on you.
What are you doing up? I was waiting
on you. You know what time it is?
I was waiting on you. You know what time
it is? G, it's business, all right?
You know what time it is? G, it's business,
all right? You know the label can go all.
G, it's business, all right? You
know the label can go all night.
You know the label can go all night.
Shoot, Dae Dae's after-party was
night. Shoot, Dae Dae's after-party
was still raging when I left.
Shoot, Dae Dae's after-party was still raging
when I left. Franklin, it is well-past all
still raging when I left.
Franklin, it is well-past all night.
Franklin, it is well-past all night.
And I'm tired as hell.
Night. And I'm tired as hell.
Alex Palomino was with you?
And I'm tired as hell. Alex Palomino was
with you? "With?" No, but I mean, she.
Alex Palomino was with you? "With?" No, but
I mean, she is one of our artists, so, yeah,
"With?" No, but I mean, she is one of
our artists, so, yeah, she was there.
Is one of our artists, so, yeah, she
was there. Keep it real, you were
she was there. Keep it real, you
were low-key hanging with your ex.
Keep it real, you were low-key
hanging with your ex last night, right?
Low-key hanging with your ex last night,
right? 'Cause this ain't a coincidence,
last night, right? 'Cause this ain't
a coincidence, you two all boo'd up.
'Cause this ain't a coincidence, you two
all boo'd up. Where you get that?
You two all boo'd up. Where you
get that? Are you with her?
Where you get that? Are you with her?
'Cause it sure looks like it.
Are you with her? 'Cause it sure looks
like it here and here and here and...
'Cause it sure looks like it here and here and
here and... Like, you're just gazing at her.
Here and here and here and... Like, you're just
gazing at her. You so damn cute, but I don't.
Like, you're just gazing at her. You so damn
cute, but I don't know why you comin' at me like.
You so damn cute, but I don't
know why you comin' at me like this.
Know why you comin' at me like this.
I didn't do nothing wrong.
This. I didn't do nothing wrong.
How am I supposed to know
I didn't do nothing wrong.
How am I supposed to know that?
How am I supposed to know that?
And how am I supposed to feel
that? And how am I supposed to feel
when our friends... my mother...
And how am I supposed to feel when our friends
my mother... sees pictures of you and her
when our friends... my mother... sees pictures
of you and her face, touching her, you know,
sees pictures of you and her face, touching
her, you know, shoulder soft and creepin'
face, touching her, you know, shoulder
soft and creepin' like a... creeper!
Shoulder soft and creepin' like a...
creeper! Like a creeper?
Like a... creeper! Like a creeper?
Oh, that's what you think?
Like a creeper? Oh, that's what
you think? Are you confessing?
Oh, that's what you think? Are you
confessing? Babe, I'm taking a shower,
Are you confessing? Babe, I'm
taking a shower, that's what I'm doing.
Babe, I'm taking a shower, that's what
I'm doing. Yeah, well, make sure you
that's what I'm doing. Yeah, well, make
sure you scrub extra hard to get the.
Yeah, well, make sure you scrub
extra hard to get the skank off.
Scrub extra hard to get the skank off.
Damn, a brother can't get
skank off. Damn, a
brother can't get clean?
Damn, a brother can't get clean?
Babe, I was at a party, all
clean? Babe, I was at
a party, all right?
Babe, I was at a party, all right?
I stink, all right?
Right? I stink, all right? You
acting real crazy right now.
I stink, all right? You acting real
crazy right now. You're crazy!
You acting real crazy right now. You're
crazy! I am not some fool that's just.
You're crazy! I am not some fool that's
just gonna lay down and just take it!
I am not some fool that's just gonna lay down
and just take it! What do you want to hear?
Gonna lay down and just take it! What do you
want to hear? What do you need to hear from.
What do you want to hear? What
do you need to hear from me?
What do you need to hear from me?
That I didn't sleep with my ex?
Me? That I didn't sleep with my ex?
Is that what you want to hear?
That I didn't sleep with my ex? Is that what you
want to hear? I did not sleep with Alex last.
Is that what you want to hear? I did not
sleep with Alex last night, all right?
I did not sleep with Alex last night,
all right? I don't believe you.
Night, all right? I don't believe you.
What are you doing?
I don't believe you. What are you
doing? I thought we don't keep.
What are you doing? I
thought we don't keep secrets.
I thought we don't keep secrets.
Okay. All right.
Secrets. Okay. All right.
You want to play that game?
Okay. All right. You want to play
that game? Let's play that game.
You want to play that game? Let's play
that game. Let me see your phone, then.
Let's play that game. Let me
see your phone, then. No.
Let me see your phone, then. No.
What are you doing?
No. What are you doing?
Oh, so you can check my phone,
What are you doing? Oh, so you can
check my phone, but I can't check yours?
Oh, so you can check my phone, but I can't
check yours? Oh, yeah, that's a little
but I can't check yours? Oh,
yeah, that's a little suspect.
Oh, yeah, that's a little suspect.
Because I am not the one who
suspect. Because I am not the one
who creeped up here at the crack of.
Because I am not the one who
creeped up here at the crack of dawn.
Creeped up here at the crack of dawn.
Right. I'm done.
Dawn. Right. I'm done.
I'm not playing this game.
Right. I'm done. I'm not playing this
game. Come on. I'm taking a shower.
I'm not playing this game. Come on.
I'm taking a shower. [ Sighs ]
Come on. I'm taking a shower.
[ Sighs ] [ Water running ]
[ Sighs ] [ Water running
] He didn't even deny it.
[ Water running ] He didn't even
deny it. I mean, he did, but come on.
He didn't even deny it. I mean, he did,
but come on. Then he cooked me breakfast
I mean, he did, but come on. Then he cooked
me breakfast trying to buy my forgiveness.
Then he cooked me breakfast trying
to buy my forgiveness with bacon.
Trying to buy my forgiveness with bacon.
I mean, it sounds like an
with bacon. I mean, it
sounds like an apology to me.
I mean, it sounds like an apology to me.
You know, I don't even
apology to me. You know, I don't
even remember the last time Franklin.
You know, I don't even remember the
last time Franklin cooked for me.
Remember the last time Franklin cooked
for me. He did it all the time when we
cooked for me. He did it all the time
when we were in the city, but...
He did it all the time when we were in the
city, but... God, we were so close when we
were in the city, but... God, we were so
close when we lived in that apartment.
God, we were so close when we lived in that
apartment. Yeah, well, 600 square feet
lived in that apartment. Yeah, well,
600 square feet will do that to a couple.
Yeah, well, 600 square feet will do that
to a couple. But this new house was
will do that to a couple. But this
new house was supposed to be a dream.
But this new house was supposed to
be a dream. For who, you or him?
Supposed to be a dream. For
who, you or him? For us.
For who, you or him?
For us. How?
For us. How? Franklin
spends all of his time.
How? Franklin spends all of his
time in the city, which means you're
Franklin spends all of his time in the city,
which means you're the one stuck in the suburbs.
In the city, which means you're the one stuck
in the suburbs. I mean, I don't know, I just...
The one stuck in the suburbs. I mean, I don't
know, I just... I wouldn't have co-signed for
I mean, I don't know, I just... I
wouldn't have co-signed for that mess.
I wouldn't have co-signed for that mess.
It made sense when we moved
that mess. It made
sense when we moved in.
It made sense when we moved in.
I mean, I can do my album
in. I mean, I can do my album
artwork anywhere, and Franklin
I mean, I can do my album artwork anywhere,
and Franklin needed a place to get away from
artwork anywhere, and Franklin needed
a place to get away from the city.
Needed a place to get away from the city.
Yeah, like I said, I would
the city. Yeah, like I said,
I would have never said yes.
Yeah, like I said, I would have never
said yes. Well, it was what we could
have never said yes. Well,
it was what we could afford.
Well, it was what we could afford.
Don't say "afford."
afford. Don't say
"afford." I hate that word!
Don't say "afford." I hate that word!
Sorry.
I hate that word! Sorry.
If that's the case, then you.
Sorry. If that's the case, then
you guys should have just stayed in.
If that's the case, then you guys should
have just stayed in that little apartment.
Guys should have just stayed in that
little apartment. Baby, you have to make
that little apartment. Baby, you have
to make sacrifices if you want to live.
Baby, you have to make sacrifices
if you want to live in the city.
Sacrifices if you want to live in the city.
Excuse me, "sacrifices."
in the city. Excuse me, "sacrifices."
You live in the Chesterton Hotel.
Excuse me, "sacrifices." You live
in the Chesterton Hotel penthouse.
You live in the Chesterton Hotel penthouse.
Yeah, I do, and I work my ass
penthouse. Yeah, I do, and
I work my ass off, okay?
Yeah, I do, and I work my ass off, okay?
I'm the motherfreakin' C.E.O.
off, okay? I'm the motherfreakin' C.E.O.
I mean, I said no to 10 people
I'm the motherfreakin' C.E.O. I mean, I
said no to 10 people this morning alone!
I mean, I said no to 10 people this
morning alone! Shareholders?
This morning alone! Shareholders?
Oh, no, girl, I was swiping.
Shareholders? Oh, no, girl, I was
swiping left on Tinder and Bumble.
Oh, no, girl, I was swiping left on Tinder
and Bumble. That man has my stomach in
left on Tinder and Bumble.
That man has my stomach in knots.
That man has my stomach in knots.
You still love him, don't
knots. You still
love him, don't you?
You still love him, don't you?
Of course I do, but the idea
you? Of course I do, but the
idea of him cheating on me and.
Of course I do, but the idea of him cheating
on me and publicly makes me want to punch
of him cheating on me and publicly makes
me want to punch him in the throat.
Publicly makes me want to punch him
in the throat. Mnh-mnh. Mnh-mnh.
Him in the throat. Mnh-mnh.
Mnh-mnh. You know my policy.
Mnh-mnh. Mnh-mnh. You know my policy.
No violence, okay?
You know my policy. No violence, okay?
Even if "What does a fool."
No violence, okay? Even if "What does
a fool deserve?" is the question.
Even if "What does a fool deserve?" is
the question. You sure about that?
"Deserve?" is the question. You sure about
that? Honey, this is fixable, okay?
You sure about that? Honey, this is
fixable, okay? All you have to do is make.
Honey, this is fixable, okay? All you
have to do is make Franklin jealous.
All you have to do is make Franklin
jealous. Yeah, slide up on him like...
Franklin jealous. Yeah, slide up
on him like... Bam! [ Giggles ]
Yeah, slide up on him like... Bam! [
Giggles ] Just make him realize what he's.
Bam! [ Giggles ] Just make him realize
what he's risking with this side piece.
Just make him realize what he's risking with
this side piece. He'll be home by Christmas.
Risking with this side piece. He'll be home
by Christmas. Yeah, but I don't know if.
He'll be home by Christmas. Yeah, but
I don't know if jealousy is my thing.
Yeah, but I don't know if jealousy is
my thing. Yeah, well, it doesn't have
jealousy is my thing. Yeah, well, it
doesn't have to be your thing, just his.
Yeah, well, it doesn't have to be
your thing, just his. You're crazy.
Man, I've been trying
to get in here for months.
Man, I've been trying to get in here
for months. They said he wasn't seeing no
in here for months. They said he
wasn't seeing no new artists.
They said he wasn't seeing no new artists.
He's not. Mannie is.
New artists. He's not. Mannie is.
Just take it down. Be cool.
He's not. Mannie is. Just take it down.
Be cool. Oh, but you still got that.
Just take it down. Be cool. Oh, but you
still got that stuff with your hubby, though,
Oh, but you still got that stuff
with your hubby, though, right?
Stuff with your hubby, though, right?
Listen, don't worry about who
right? Listen, don't worry
about who got me what.
Listen, don't worry about who got
me what. You just remember who you got
got me what. You just
remember who you got here.
You just remember who you got here.
Okay.
Here. Okay. I got it.
Okay. I got it. Hey, babe.
I got it. Hey, babe.
Oh, Franklin! Hi!
Hey, babe. Oh, Franklin!
Hi! What are you doing here?
Oh, Franklin! Hi! What are you doing
here? [ Laughs ] What are you.
What are you doing here? [ Laughs ]
What are you talking about? I work here.
[ Laughs ] What are you talking about?
I work here. Oh! I'm, uh...
talking about? I work here. Oh!
I'm, uh... Franklin, this is Chris.
Oh! I'm, uh... Franklin, this is Chris.
Chris. You remember Chris.
Franklin, this is Chris. Chris. You remember
Chris. He is now seeing Mannie 'cause
Chris. You remember Chris. He is now seeing
Mannie 'cause he's a solo artist now.
He is now seeing Mannie 'cause he's a
solo artist now. Well, go ahead, baby.
He's a solo artist now. Well,
go ahead, baby. Tell him the deal.
Well, go ahead, baby. Tell him the deal.
Don't call me baby.
Tell him the deal. Don't call me baby.
Regina, you, um...
Don't call me baby. Regina,
you, um... But you my baby.
Regina, you, um... But you my baby.
You, um, brought your ex.
But you my baby. You,
um, brought your ex here?
You, um, brought your ex here?
You know what, I completely
here? You know what,
I completely spaced.
You know what, I completely spaced.
He is my ex. We dated.
Spaced. He is my ex. We dated.
[ Laughs ] I forgot! We dated.
He is my ex. We dated. [ Laughs ] I forgot!
We dated. I didn't.
[ Laughs ] I forgot! We dated. I didn't.
You don't have to co-sign.
I didn't. You don't
have to co-sign everything.
You don't have to co-sign everything.
You're gonna get me in trouble.
Everything. You're gonna get me in trouble.
Wait a minute...
You're gonna get me in trouble.
Wait a minute... Oh! Boss man!
Wait a minute... Oh! Boss man!
Come here, baby!
Oh! Boss man! Come here, baby!
Can I talk to you for a second?
Come here, baby! Can I talk to you
for a second? Just a little second.
Can I talk to you for a second? Just a
little second. You don't need to talk to.
Just a little second. You
don't need to talk to him.
You don't need to talk to him.
I just... We're gonna...
Him. I just... We're gonna...
I said I was gonna... Okay.
I just... We're gonna... I said I
was gonna... Okay. Mnh-mnh.
I said I was gonna... Okay. Mnh-mnh.
Listen, I sure do appreciate you.
Mnh-mnh. Listen, I sure do appreciate
you letting your girl make moves for.
Listen, I sure do appreciate you
letting your girl make moves for me.
Letting your girl make moves for me.
Make moves?
Me. Make moves? She
always did like it when.
Make moves? She always did like it
when I... [ Grunts ]... dropped a new.
She always did like it when I...
[ Grunts ]... dropped a new hit.
I... [ Grunts ]... dropped a new hit.
What?
Hit. What? [
Laughing ] Just playing.
What? [ Laughing ] Just playing.
Just playing, man.
[ Laughing ] Just playing. Just playing,
man. Come on, man, I know you hittin'
Just playing, man. Come on, man, I know
you hittin' it hard, hittin' it hard and.
Come on, man, I know you hittin' it hard,
hittin' it hard and making her happy.
It hard, hittin' it hard and making her
happy. Regina, um, I need to speak
making her happy. Regina, um, I
need to speak to you in my office.
Regina, um, I need to speak
to you in my office. Alone!
What is this? Since when do you
bring new talent into my office?
Since when do you bring new talent into
my office? What, are you in A&R now?
Talent into my office? What, are you in
A&R now? His manager was not making.
What, are you in A&R now? His manager was
not making headway, so they called me and.
His manager was not making headway, so they
called me and asked if I would step in...
Headway, so they called me and asked if I would
step in... Call and asked you to what?
Asked if I would step in... Call
and asked you to what? For this guy?
Call and asked you to what?
For this guy? I'm your husband.
For this guy? I'm your husband.
You want me to meet with this
I'm your husband. You want
me to meet with this guy?
You want me to meet with this guy?
No, with Mannie, and I'm just
guy? No, with Mannie, and I'm
just trying to help a brother out.
No, with Mannie, and I'm just trying to help
a brother out. That is a brother that you
trying to help a brother out. That is a brother
that you were engaged to at one point in.
That is a brother that you were
engaged to at one point in time.
Were engaged to at one point in time.
So?
Time. So? "So?"
So? "So?" Oh, yeah,
that's no big deal.
"So?" Oh, yeah, that's no big deal.
That's no big deal.
Oh, yeah, that's no big deal. That's no
big deal. No. I mean, you guys did, you.
That's no big deal. No. I mean, you guys
did, you know, grown-up naked things,
No. I mean, you guys did, you know,
grown-up naked things, all right?
Know, grown-up naked things, all right?
That's a big deal!
All right? That's a big deal!
You know what, I am just.
That's a big deal! You know what, I
am just trying to do all I can to help.
You know what, I am just trying
to do all I can to help him out.
Trying to do all I can to help him out.
You know how cold it can be,
him out. You know how cold it can
be, you know how lonely it can be.
You know how cold it can be, you know how lonely
it can be when someone's trying to make it
you know how lonely it can be when someone's
trying to make it on their own, and you know how
when someone's trying to make it on their own,
and you know how generous I am on the holidays.
On their own, and you know how generous I am on
the holidays. Okay, hold on, wait a minute.
Generous I am on the holidays. Okay, hold on,
wait a minute. How long have you two been back.
Okay, hold on, wait a minute. How
long have you two been back in contact?
How long have you two been back in contact?
In what way?
In contact? In what way?
"In what way?"
In what way? "In
what way?" "In what way?"
"In what way?" "In what way?"
Regina, you are my wife, all.
"In what way?" Regina, you
are my wife, all right?
Regina, you are my wife, all right?
You know what, this whole
right? You know what, this whole
situation, I'm uncomfortable.
You know what, this whole
situation, I'm uncomfortable with.
Situation, I'm uncomfortable with.
Hey, you're not okay with
with. Hey, you're not okay with
this situation, but I'm supposed.
Hey, you're not okay with this situation, but
I'm supposed to just swallow the fact that
this situation, but I'm supposed to just swallow
the fact that last night you spent half the
to just swallow the fact that last night you
spent half the night guzzling down drinks with
last night you spent half the night guzzling
down drinks with your ex at a club!
Night guzzling down drinks with your ex at
a club! How many times I got to tell
your ex at a club! How many times
I got to tell you? Nothing happened.
How many times I got to tell you?
Nothing happened. Well, then, prove it,
you? Nothing happened. Well,
then, prove it, Franklin!
Well, then, prove it, Franklin!
Get her on the phone right now
Franklin! Get her on the phone right
now and put it on speaker so I can.
Get her on the phone right now and put it on
speaker so I can hear for myself that nothing
and put it on speaker so I can hear
for myself that nothing happened!
Hear for myself that nothing happened!
Yeah, 'cause I want to hear it!
Happened! Yeah, 'cause I want to hear it!
Everything single thing about.
Yeah, 'cause I want to hear it! Everything
single thing about that is just ridiculous.
Everything single thing about that is just
ridiculous. Everything is about that is
that is just ridiculous. Everything is about
that is wrong because you have something.
Everything is about that is wrong
because you have something to hide!
Wrong because you have something to hide!
I got nothing to hide except
to hide! I got nothing to hide
except for the fact that my wife is.
I got nothing to hide except for the
fact that my wife is low-key crazy.
For the fact that my wife is low-key crazy.
You cheated on me!
Low-key crazy. You cheated on me!
How am I low-key crazy?
You cheated on me! How am I low-key
crazy? If I'm low-key crazy, you can.
How am I low-key crazy? If I'm low-key
crazy, you can add high-key hostile to that.
If I'm low-key crazy, you can add
high-key hostile to that list!
Add high-key hostile to that list!
Oh, my God! I...
List! Oh, my God! I... Huh?
Oh, my God! I... Huh? Huh?
Huh? Huh? God!
Huh? God! Are you done?
God! Are you done?
Now I am done!
Are you done? Now I am done!
[ Panting ]
Now I am done! [ Panting
] This is not working.
[ Panting ] This is not working.
I don't do this.
This is not working. I don't do this.
I don't come here and I don't do
I don't do this. I don't come here and
I don't do this, and this is not...
I don't come here and I don't do this, and
this is not... This is not who I am...
this, and this is not... This
is not who I am... And...
This is not who I am... And... And
I'm... I'm like this because.
And... And I'm... I'm like this
because I don't trust you.
And I'm... I'm like this because I don't
trust you. Franklin, I don't trust you.
I don't trust you. Franklin, I don't
trust you. Hold on. Wait, Regina!
Franklin, I don't trust you. Hold on.
Wait, Regina! You don't...
Hold on. Wait, Regina! You don't
Wait, what do you mean, you.
You don't... Wait, what do you
mean, you don't trust me?
Wait, what do you mean, you don't trust me?
I mean, I know things have been
don't trust me? I mean, I know things
have been shaky between us a little bit
I mean, I know things have been shaky
between us a little bit lately, but...
shaky between us a little bit lately,
but... There is something real with you
lately, but... There is something
real with you and me, all right?
There is something real with you and me,
all right? You know that, I know that.
And me, all right? You know that,
I know that. This is nothing.
You know that, I know that. This is
nothing. Without trust, this is nothing.
This is nothing. Without trust,
this is nothing. So it's over.
Without trust, this is nothing. So
it's over. And I want a divorce.
So it's over. And I want a divorce.
Goodbye, Franklin.
You know how something
happens, and you're there to
You know how something happens, and you're
there to feel it, but you're powerless to
happens, and you're there to feel it, but
you're powerless to do anything about it?
Feel it, but you're powerless to do anything
about it? Something's broken, and no one
do anything about it? Something's broken,
and no one knows if it's even fixable, and.
Something's broken, and no one knows if it's even
fixable, and neither party is willing to take
knows if it's even fixable, and neither
party is willing to take that first step.
Neither party is willing to take that
first step. All parties consented to the
that first step. All parties consented
to the terms of divorce and dissolution.
All parties consented to the terms of divorce and
dissolution of assets discussed therein, and
terms of divorce and dissolution of assets discussed
therein, and so the divorce was granted and
of assets discussed therein, and so the divorce
was granted and would be finalized in 30 days.
So the divorce was granted and would be
finalized in 30 days. That's Christmas Day.
Would be finalized in 30 days. That's
Christmas Day. We got married on Christmas.
That's Christmas Day. We got married
on Christmas. I can't believe it.
We got married on Christmas.
I can't believe it. Excuse me.
[ Doorbell rings ]
Hello? Yo, G, I'm here!
G, where you at? Regina?
[ Glass shatters ]
Hey, G... Regina Kimberly
Cartwright Young!
Regina Kimberly Cartwright Young!
Present.
Young! Present. Girl.
Present. Girl. This
is extra, even for you.
Girl. This is extra, even for you.
There's no Christmas.
This is extra, even for you. There's
no Christmas. There's just a divorce.
There's no Christmas. There's just a
divorce. Oh, for the love of all.
There's just a divorce. Oh, for
the love of all things Drake!
Oh, for the love of all things Drake!
[ Laughs ]
Things Drake! [ Laughs ]
"For the love of all things.
[ Laughs ] "For the
love of all things Drake!"
"For the love of all things
Drake!" I'm over it, I'm over it.
"Drake!" I'm over it, I'm over it.
I can't. I can't. [ Laughs ]
[ Belches ] No glasses, just bottles.
It's a good one, too.
No glasses, just bottles. It's a good
one, too. I started opening boxes with.
It's a good one, too. I started opening
boxes with Christmas lights, decorations,
I started opening boxes with Christmas lights,
decorations, tinsel, trees 'cause me and
Christmas lights, decorations, tinsel, trees
'cause me and Franklin, we used to do it
tinsel, trees 'cause me and Franklin,
we used to do it together.
Franklin, we used to do it together.
We did it together for like
together. We did it
together for like 6 years.
We did it together for like 6 years.
So since he's gone, I'm just
6 years. So since he's gone, I'm
just gonna... I'm gonna kill.
So since he's gone, I'm just gonna
I'm gonna kill Christmas.
Gonna... I'm gonna kill Christmas.
[ Sobbing ]
Christmas. [ Sobbing ] Okay.
No, no, no, no.
[ Sobbing ] Okay. No, no, no, no.
[ Laughs ]
Okay. No, no, no, no. [ Laughs
] That's enough. That's...
[ Laughs ] That's enough.
That's... That's enough of this.
That's enough. That's... That's
enough of this. Give me that.
That's enough of this. Give me that.
[ Sighs ]
Give me that. [ Sighs ]
Okay, you know what, um...
[ Sighs ] Okay, you know what, um...
I think you should come stay.
Okay, you know what, um... I
think you should come stay with me.
I think you should come stay with me.
At the Chesterton?
With me. At the Chesterton?
Yeah! You love it there.
At the Chesterton? Yeah! You love
it there. Don't you remember performing.
Yeah! You love it there. Don't
you remember performing there, hmm?
Don't you remember performing there, hmm?
It's all dolled up now.
There, hmm? It's all dolled up now.
It's gorgeous.
It's all dolled up now. It's gorgeous.
Absolutely gorgeous.
It's gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous.
Christmastime.
Absolutely gorgeous. Christmastime.
There's a tree and ornaments and.
Christmastime. There's a tree and
ornaments and carolers, and...
There's a tree and ornaments and carolers,
and... And, I mean, no one hates
carolers, and... And, I mean, no one
hates Christmas at the Chesterton.
And, I mean, no one hates Christmas at the
Chesterton. It'll help you keep your mind
Christmas at the Chesterton. It'll
help you keep your mind off of things.
It'll help you keep your mind off
of things. I can't! I'm busy!
Off of things. I can't! I'm busy!
You know, I can't just hang out.
I can't! I'm busy! You know, I can't
just hang out at the holidays, Trish.
You know, I can't just hang out at the
holidays, Trish. I have work to do.
At the holidays, Trish. I have work to do.
Yeah, baby, I highly doubt
I have work to do. Yeah, baby, I
highly doubt we're getting any work done.
Yeah, baby, I highly doubt
we're getting any work done here.
We're getting any work done here.
It's not happening.
Here. It's not happening.
[ Imitates buzzer ] Wrong!
It's not happening. [ Imitates buzzer
] Wrong! I got a lot of stuff done.
[ Imitates buzzer ] Wrong! I
got a lot of stuff done. Okay.
I got a lot of stuff done. Okay.
I've been working all damn.
Okay. I've been
working all damn day.
I've been working all damn day.
Take a look.
Oh, no, no, no, no. This will never do.
Unh-unh! Unh-unh! Come on.
This will never do. Unh-unh! Unh-unh!
Come on. No, no, no. Go pack your bags.
Unh-unh! Unh-unh! Come on. No, no, no. Go
pack your bags. You're coming with me.
No, no, no. Go pack your bags. You're
coming with me. Pack a bag. Let's go. Go!
You're coming with me. Pack a bag.
Let's go. Go! [ Coughs ]
Pack a bag. Let's go. Go!
[ Coughs ] Go!
We got to sober you up. And I'm gonna go ahead
and call my old therapist and see if she.
And I'm gonna go ahead and call my old
therapist and see if she can squeeze you in.
My old therapist and see if
she can squeeze you in. Mm.
[ Sighs ] Holly, can you get in here?
I got to sign these contracts.
Holly, can you get in here? I got to
sign these contracts. I need your help.
I got to sign these contracts. I need
your help. I can't find my glasses.
I need your help. I can't find my glasses.
Uh, Franklin?
I can't find my glasses. Uh, Franklin?
Check your head.
Uh, Franklin? Check your head.
There you go. Anything else?
Check your head. There you go.
Anything else? Yeah, I'm starving.
There you go. Anything else? Yeah,
I'm starving. Where's my lunch?
Yeah, I'm starving. Where's my lunch?
I wasn't aware that you had.
Where's my lunch? I wasn't
aware that you had ordered lunch.
I wasn't aware that you had ordered
lunch. Holly, you usually take care
ordered lunch. Holly, you usually take
care of that on Thursdays, all right?
Holly, you usually take care of that
on Thursdays, all right? I don't...
Of that on Thursdays, all right? I
don't... Uh, Franklin, it's Friday.
I don't... Uh, Franklin, it's Friday.
Well, why isn't it Thursday?
Uh, Franklin, it's Friday. Well, why isn't
it Thursday? Well, Thursday already got.
Well, why isn't it Thursday? Well,
Thursday already got its shot this week, huh?
Well, Thursday already got its shot this
week, huh? You know, if you want, I can run
its shot this week, huh? You know, if you want,
I can run next door and I can grab some of.
You know, if you want, I can run next door and I
can grab some of that Thai food that you really
next door and I can grab some of
that Thai food that you really like.
That Thai food that you really like.
I'm good, I'm good.
Like. I'm good, I'm good.
[ Laughs ] It's...
I'm good, I'm good. [ Laughs ] It's
Holly, I'm sorry. I really am.
[ Laughs ] It's... Holly, I'm sorry.
I really am. [ Giggles ]
[ Sighs ]
[ Ringing ] Hello, you've
reached Regina Cartwright Young.
Hello, you've reached Regina Cartwright
Young. Please leave a message for me.
Regina Cartwright Young. Please leave a message
for me after the tone and I'll call...
Please leave a message for me after the
tone and I'll call... [ Cellphone beeps ]
After the tone and I'll call... [
Cellphone beeps ] [ Intercom beeps ]
[ Cellphone beeps ] [ Intercom beeps
] Franklin, your 2:00 is here.
[ Intercom beeps ] Franklin, your 2:00
is here. I don't think you're gonna like.
Franklin, your 2:00 is here. I don't
think you're gonna like this one.
I don't think you're gonna like this one.
No, no, no. Holly, it's okay.
This one. No, no, no. Holly, it's okay.
It's all good. Just, uh...
No, no, no. Holly, it's okay. It's all good.
Just, uh... Just go ahead and send him in.
It's all good. Just, uh... Just go
ahead and send him in. Okay.
Just go ahead and send him in. Okay.
[ Clears throat ]
Hi, Frankie. Alex,
what are you doing here?
Alex, what are you doing here?
I got a meeting with
here? I got a meeting with
Troy Weathersby, I...
I got a meeting with Troy Weathersby,
I... Troy's not coming. I am.
Troy Weathersby, I... Troy's not coming.
I am. I don't understand.
Troy's not coming. I am. I don't
understand. Come on, Frankie.
I don't understand. Come on, Frankie.
You know if I had booked this.
Come on, Frankie. You know if I had
booked this meeting alone, just the two of.
You know if I had booked this meeting alone,
just the two of us, you wouldn't have taken it.
Meeting alone, just the two of us, you wouldn't
have taken it. Okay, so, what do you need
us, you wouldn't have taken it.
Okay, so, what do you need from me?
Alex, I'm still married. Not for
long. I want to be the present you.
Not for long. I want to be the
present you can't wait to open up on
I want to be the present you can't
wait to open up on Christmas.
Can't wait to open up on Christmas.
You can open me anytime.
Christmas. You can open me anytime.
I won't tell.
You can open me anytime. I won't tell.
[ Laughs ]
I'm Thomas. Welcome
to the Chesterton.
I'm Thomas. Welcome to the Chesterton.
Thank you.
Welcome to the Chesterton. Thank you.
Needs much more gold.
Thank you. Needs much more gold.
Well, then you shall have it,
Needs much more gold. Well,
then you shall have it, my dear.
Well, then you shall have it, my dear.
Anything you need.
My dear. Anything you need. Oh, Mr.
James, my favorite.
Anything you need. Oh, Mr.
James, my favorite client!
Oh, Mr. James, my favorite client!
How are you?
Client! How are you?
This is gonna be your most.
How are you? This is gonna be
your most beautiful Christmas yet.
This is gonna be your most beautiful Christmas
yet. Now, you say that every year.
Beautiful Christmas yet. Now, you say that
every year. Well, it's true every year.
Now, you say that every year. Well,
it's true every year. You have the gift.
Well, it's true every year. You have
the gift. [ Laughing ] Thank you.
You have the gift. [ Laughing ]
Thank you. Beautiful, as always.
[ Laughing ] Thank you. Beautiful,
as always. Well, thank you!
Beautiful, as always. Well,
thank you! Oh, hey! J.J.!
Well, thank you! Oh, hey!
J.J.! Regina! My songbird.
Oh, hey! J.J.! Regina! My songbird.
Hi! Mwah. Oh!
Regina! My songbird. Hi!
Mwah. Oh! Welcome.
Hi! Mwah. Oh! Welcome.
Thank you.
Welcome. Thank you.
It looks like I'm gonna be.
Thank you. It looks like I'm gonna
be spending the holidays here at.
It looks like I'm gonna be spending
the holidays here at the Chesterton.
Spending the holidays here at the
Chesterton. Yes, we've been expecting
the Chesterton. Yes,
we've been expecting you.
Yes, we've been expecting you.
[ Chuckles ]
You. [ Chuckles ] This lobby...
[ Chuckles ] This lobby
Every year, it just...
This lobby... Every year, it
just... It just lifts my spirits.
Every year, it just... It just
lifts my spirits. Ready, Kev?
It just lifts my spirits. Ready, Kev?
Ready!
Ready, Kev? Ready!
Okay, good. Here.
Ready! Okay, good. Here.
Take these and take them all.
Okay, good. Here. Take these
and take them all around.
Take these and take them all around.
And weave. And weave. Yes!
Around. And weave. And weave. Yes!
Do you remember your run.
And weave. And weave. Yes!
Do you remember your run here?
Do you remember your run here?
Sold out every night.
Here? Sold out every night.
Glorious voice.
Sold out every night. Glorious voice.
You know I left that behind.
Glorious voice. You know I
left that behind years ago.
You know I left that behind years ago.
Well, a spot's still open for
years ago. Well, a
spot's still open for you.
Well, a spot's still open for you.
And you better grab it quick
you. And you better grab it quick
while I'm still running things.
And you better grab it quick while
I'm still running things here.
While I'm still running things here.
What are you talking about?
Here. What are you talking about?
You've been at the Chesterton.
What are you talking about? You've been
at the Chesterton for, what, 40 years.
You've been at the Chesterton for, what,
40 years. You're not going anywhere.
For, what, 40 years. You're not going
anywhere. Mm, no, no, no. Not just yet.
You're not going anywhere. Mm, no, no, no.
Not just yet. But I'm not getting any younger.
Mm, no, no, no. Not just yet. But I'm not getting
any younger. Well, it's not the Chesterton.
But I'm not getting any younger. Well,
it's not the Chesterton without J.J. James.
Well, it's not the Chesterton without
J.J. James. [ Chuckles ] Mm.
Without J.J. James. [ Chuckles ] Mm.
Always a charmer.
[ Chuckles ] Mm. Always a charmer.
Now, you make sure we grab a.
Always a charmer. Now, you make sure we
grab a drink before I leave, all right?
Now, you make sure we grab a drink
before I leave, all right? [ Gasps ]
Drink before I leave, all right?
[ Gasps ] [ Screams ]
Oh! [ Gasps, sighs ] I am so sorry.
Are you okay?
[ Gasps, sighs ] I am so sorry. Are
you okay? And just like that, it's.
I am so sorry. Are you okay?
And just like that, it's Christmas.
Yes. [ Sighs ] Oh, my God.
[ Sighs ] Oh, my God.
[ Clicks teeth, sighs ]
Oh, my God. [ Clicks teeth, sighs ]
Would you like to go ahead of.
[ Clicks teeth, sighs ] Would
you like to go ahead of me?
Would you like to go ahead of me?
Yes, actually, I'm on a
me? Yes, actually, I'm
on a really tight schedule.
Yes, actually, I'm on a really
tight schedule. [ Scoffs ] Okay.
Really tight schedule. [ Scoffs ] Okay.
Doesn't this place just give you.
[ Scoffs ] Okay. Doesn't
this place just give you life?
Doesn't this place just give you life?
[ Scoffs ] More like it needs
life? [ Scoffs ] More
like it needs to get a life.
[ Scoffs ] More like it needs
to get a life. [ Laughs ]
To get a life. [ Laughs
] Well, Christmas...
[ Laughs ] Well, Christmas
I love Christmas.
Well, Christmas... I love Christmas.
I thought I was over it this
I love Christmas. I thought I was over
it this year... bad breakup... but this
I thought I was over it this year... bad
breakup... but this place just always...
Year... bad breakup... but this place just
always... Let me just stop you right
place just always... Let
me just stop you right there.
Let me just stop you right there.
Listen, I don't do small talk
there. Listen, I don't do
small talk with strangers.
Listen, I don't do small talk with
strangers. I don't do close-proximity
with strangers. I don't do close-proximity
chitchat, and I definitely don't
I don't do close-proximity chitchat,
and I definitely don't do Christmas.
Chitchat, and I definitely don't do
Christmas. Well, I don't do bitches.
So you're chilling with your homegirl for
the holidays? Y'all been A1 since Day 1.
Homegirl for the holidays? Y'all been
A1 since Day 1. Something like that.
Y'all been A1 since Day 1. Something
like that. We were roommates in college.
Something like that. We were roommates in
college. [ Sighs ] I didn't make it to.
We were roommates in college. [
Sighs ] I didn't make it to college.
[ Sighs ] I didn't make it to college.
You know what, this job right
college. You know what, this job
right here, this is the start of.
You know what, this job right here, this
is the start of something good in my life.
Here, this is the start of something good
in my life. Money's not flush, but it got
something good in my life. Money's not
flush, but it got grow potential.
Money's not flush, but it got grow
potential. Well, money's not everything,
grow potential. Well, money's
not everything, Thomas.
Well, money's not everything, Thomas.
[ Scoffs, laughs ]
Thomas. [ Scoffs,
laughs ] What?
[ Scoffs, laughs ] What?
That's something only a rich.
What? That's something
only a rich person would say.
That's something only a rich person
would say. I never heard that in my hood.
Person would say. I never heard that in
my hood. Unless it's somebody poorer
I never heard that in my hood. Unless it's
somebody poorer trying to convince somebody else.
Unless it's somebody poorer trying to convince
somebody else poorer not to be sad about being
trying to convince somebody else
poorer not to be sad about being poor!
Poorer not to be sad about being poor!
I started this job last week,
poor! I started this job last
week, and I know Ms. McDonald.
I started this job last week, and I
know Ms. McDonald. She got cake!
And I know Ms. McDonald.
She got cake! Mm.
She got cake! Mm.
Look, you know somebody.
Mm. Look, you know somebody
cashing out when they don't got.
Look, you know somebody cashing out
when they don't got to drive nowhere.
Cashing out when they don't got to drive
nowhere. All she got to do is just raise
to drive nowhere. All she got to do is just
raise her hand and wave it and then...
All she got to do is just raise her hand and wave
it and then... Pow! A black limo pops out of
her hand and wave it and then... Pow!
A black limo pops out of nowhere!
Pow! A black limo
pops out of nowhere!
Nowhere! [ Door closes ]
[ Door closes ] You
can just put the bags
[ Door closes ] You can just
put the bags over there, Thomas.
You can just put the bags over
there, Thomas. Whoa! What?
Over there, Thomas. Whoa!
What? Thomas?
Whoa! What? Thomas?
[ Laughing ] Yo!
Thomas? [ Laughing ] Yo!
This is my first time ever being.
[ Laughing ] Yo! This is my
first time ever being in here!
This is my first time ever being in here!
I think I want to die in here.
In here! I think I want to die in here.
This is nice!
I think I want to die in here.
This is nice! What does she do?
This is nice! What does she do?
Did she create Black Twitter?
What does she do? Did she create Black
Twitter? Actually, her dad invented.
Did she create Black Twitter? Actually,
her dad invented Rocker Bottom shoes.
Actually, her dad invented
Rocker Bottom shoes. No way!
Rocker Bottom shoes. No way!
Those shoes are mad dope.
No way! Those shoes are mad dope.
I got to meet him!
Those shoes are mad dope. I got
to meet him! Well, he passed.
I got to meet him! Well, he passed.
Trish runs everything now.
Well, he passed. Trish
runs everything now. Oh.
Trish runs everything now. Oh.
Man, I bet she'd give it all up.
Oh. Man, I bet she'd give it all
up to have her dad back again.
Man, I bet she'd give it all up to have her dad
back again. Well, I bet she would, too,
to have her dad back again. Well,
I bet she would, too, Thomas.
Well, I bet she would, too, Thomas.
My dad's still breathing.
Thomas. My dad's still breathing.
When he kicks, he ain't leaving.
My dad's still breathing. When he kicks, he
ain't leaving me nothing... maybe some of his.
When he kicks, he ain't leaving me nothing... maybe
some of his debt and a couple of his kids to
me nothing... maybe some of his debt
and a couple of his kids to feed.
Debt and a couple of his kids to feed.
All righty, then.
Feed. All righty, then. Uh,
well, it was nice to meet.
All righty, then. Uh, well, it was nice
to meet you, and I really appreciate.
Uh, well, it was nice to meet you,
and I really appreciate your help.
You, and I really appreciate your help.
Yeah, just call down to the
your help. Yeah, just call down to
the Bell Desk anytime, ask for me,
Yeah, just call down to the Bell
Desk anytime, ask for me, Thomas.
Bell Desk anytime, ask for me, Thomas.
Okay. Will do.
Thomas. Okay. Will do.
Oh! Wait.
Okay. Will do. Oh! Wait. Thomas!
Oh! Wait. Thomas! [ Door opens ]
Thomas! [ Door opens ] Thomas!
[ Door opens ] Thomas! Oh!
Thomas! Oh! Hey, uh,
you must be Regina.
Oh! Hey, uh, you must be Regina.
I am, and you are...
Hey, uh, you must be Regina. I am, and
you are... Uh, it's a pleasure...
I am, and you are... Uh, it's a
pleasure... A pleasure to meet you.
Uh, it's a pleasure... A pleasure
to meet you. I meant your name.
A pleasure to meet you. I meant
your name. Oh, of course...
I meant your name. Oh, of
course... Of course you did.
Oh, of course... Of course you did.
Um, my apologies.
Of course you did. Um, my apologies.
For kissing your hand.
Um, my apologies. For
kissing your hand. Uh...
For kissing your hand. Uh...
Although it was, uh, magical.
Uh... Although it
was, uh, magical on my end.
Although it was, uh, magical on my end.
You are charming.
On my end. You are charming.
[ Laughs ] Ulysses.
You are charming. [ Laughs ] Ulysses.
Ulysses Danbert.
[ Laughs ] Ulysses. Ulysses Danbert.
Great to meet you.
Ulysses Danbert. Great to meet you.
Oh, well, look...
Great to meet you. Oh, well,
look... Trish said you were coming by.
Oh, well, look... Trish
said you were coming by today.
Trish said you were coming by today.
But she failed to mention how
today. But she failed to
mention how beautiful you are.
But she failed to mention how beautiful
you are. Well, that's very sweet,
beautiful you are. Well, that's
very sweet, Ulysses, thank you.
Well, that's very sweet, Ulysses,
thank you. I... I needed to hear that.
Ulysses, thank you. I... I
needed to hear that today.
I... I needed to hear that today.
Well, look, um... [ Laughs ]
Today. Well, look, um...
[ Laughs ] I...
Well, look, um... [ Laughs ] I...
I live a door away... actually.
I... I live a door away... actually
7 1/2 steps and a door away.
I live a door away... actually 7 1/2
steps and a door away. Okay.
7 1/2 steps and a door away. Okay.
So if you ever need anything,
Okay. So if you ever need
anything, don't hesitate...
So if you ever need anything, don't
hesitate... Matter of fact, let me give you
don't hesitate... Matter of fact,
let me give you one of these.
Matter of fact, let me give you one
of these. It's a little bent, but...
one of these. It's a little bent, but...
It'd be my pleasure.
It's a little bent, but... It'd be
my pleasure to come when you call.
It'd be my pleasure to come when you call.
Thank you.
To come when you call. Thank you.
Okay.
Thank you. Okay. You
can... You can text, too.
Okay. You can... You can text, too.
Pleasure to come when you call?
You can... You can text, too. Pleasure
to come when you call? What? Really?
[ Sighs ]
"Back soon. Make yourself at home.
Don't smash my stuff!"
"Make yourself at home. Don't smash
my stuff! Hid the hammer. Smooches."
"Don't smash my stuff! Hid the hammer.
Smooches." Trish...
[ Door opens ] All righty, G.
What is all this?
All righty, G. What is all this?
Oh, just a little pick-me-up.
What is all this? Oh, just a little
pick-me-up and pick-you-up that I picked up.
Oh, just a little pick-me-up and pick-you-up
that I picked up while I was out.
And pick-you-up that I picked
up while I was out. Okay...
while I was out. Okay...
Christmas comin' early for.
Okay... Christmas comin'
early for the penthouse peeps.
Christmas comin' early for the penthouse
peeps. For the rest of us, we got to
the penthouse peeps. For the rest of us,
we got to wait till the toys get marked.
For the rest of us, we got to wait
till the toys get marked down.
Wait till the toys get marked down.
Twice.
Down. Twice. No, you don't.
Twice. No, you don't.
Christmas is here for everyone,
No, you don't. Christmas is here
for everyone, Thomas, especially you.
Christmas is here for everyone,
Thomas, especially you. No way.
Thomas, especially you. No way.
10 1/2, right?
No way. 10 1/2, right?
How did you know?
10 1/2, right? How did you know?
It's my business.
How did you know? It's my business.
Oh, my gosh.
It's my business. Oh, my gosh.
Thank you so much, Ms. McDonald.
Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much, Ms.
McDonald. I'm gonna actually wear these.
Thank you so much, Ms. McDonald. I'm
gonna actually wear these home.
I'm gonna actually wear these home.
Wait, reverse it.
Home. Wait, reverse it. I'm
gonna wait till I get home.
Wait, reverse it. I'm gonna wait till I
get home because a boy can get jacked for
I'm gonna wait till I get home because a boy
can get jacked for some Rocker Bottoms.
Because a boy can get jacked for some Rocker
Bottoms. [ Laughs ] On that thought...
some Rocker Bottoms. [ Laughs ] On
that thought... Well, just in case...
[ Laughs ] On that thought...
Well, just in case... [ Laughs ]
Well, just in case... [
Laughs ] The blue ones, too.
[ Laughs ] The blue ones, too.
Thank you so much!
The blue ones, too. Thank you so much!
You're welcome, sweetheart.
Thank you so much! You're
welcome, sweetheart. Gosh!
You're welcome, sweetheart. Gosh!
Girl, I cannot believe you.
Gosh! Girl, I cannot believe you
are still giving out sneakers as.
Girl, I cannot believe you are
still giving out sneakers as tips.
Are still giving out sneakers as tips.
Oh, no, no, no.
Tips. Oh, no, no, no.
Those retail at $150.
Oh, no, no, no. Those retail at $150.
That's called advertisement.
Those retail at $150. That's called
advertisement. Okay? Webuyblack
That's called advertisement. Okay?
Webuyblack Well, I must say, sweetheart, I
Okay? Webuyblack Well, I must say,
sweetheart, I am so happy you're here.
Well, I must say, sweetheart, I am so happy
you're here. Thank you for rescuing me.
Am so happy you're here. Thank
you for rescuing me. Oh!
Thank you for rescuing me. Oh!
Now, you do know I could have.
Oh! Now, you do know I could
have sold tickets to that show,
Now, you do know I could have sold
tickets to that show, though, right?
Sold tickets to that show, though, right?
[ Sighs ] I know.
Though, right? [ Sighs ] I know.
I was acting crazy.
[ Sighs ] I know. I was acting crazy.
I probably would have done the
I was acting crazy. I probably
would have done the same thing.
I probably would have done the same thing.
Hold on, what, sold tickets?
Same thing. Hold on,
what, sold tickets? No!
Hold on, what, sold tickets?
No! Oh, no, no, no, no.
No! Oh, no, no, no, no.
If I go full-out Hip-Hop Wives,
Oh, no, no, no, no. If I go
full-out Hip-Hop Wives, then you can.
If I go full-out Hip-Hop Wives, then
you can. Just make sure that you give
then you can. Just make sure that
you give half of it to my Ugandan.
Just make sure that you give half
of it to my Ugandan charity.
Half of it to my Ugandan charity.
That way, when you spill the
charity. That way, when you spill the
tea, it could be in the name of.
That way, when you spill the tea, it could
be in the name of insanity and philanthropy.
Tea, it could be in the name of
insanity and philanthropy. Mm-hmm.
Insanity and philanthropy. Mm-hmm.
And, uh, sweetie, just so you.
Mm-hmm. And, uh, sweetie, just so you
know, you're not the only person.
And, uh, sweetie, just so you know, you're
not the only person with man problems.
Know, you're not the only
person with man problems. No!
With man problems. No! Today
Oh, my God... they were.
No! Today... Oh, my God... they
were throwing themselves at me.
Today... Oh, my God... they were throwing
themselves at me. Couldn't decide. I didn't know.
Throwing themselves at me. Couldn't decide.
I didn't know. Valentino, Versace...
Couldn't decide. I didn't know. Valentino,
Versace... Decisions, decisions.
Valentino, Versace... Decisions, decisions.
Oh, Trish.
Decisions, decisions. Oh, Trish.
Those are gorgeous.
Oh, Trish. Those are gorgeous.
Yep, that's yours, and guess.
Those are gorgeous. Yep,
that's yours, and guess what?
Yep, that's yours, and guess what?
We're going out.
What? We're going out. No.
We're going out. No.
That's right.
No. That's right. Christmas party.
Let's go!
That's right. Christmas party.
Let's go! No! I'm not ready.
Christmas party. Let's go! No!
I'm not ready. Why?
No! I'm not ready. Why?
Girl, I'm not asking you to dive.
Why? Girl, I'm not asking
you to dive all the way in.
Girl, I'm not asking you to dive all the
way in. Just, you know, stick a toe in.
All the way in. Just, you know, stick a
toe in. Just stick a toe in. Exactly!
Just, you know, stick a toe in. Just
stick a toe in. Exactly! [ Laughs ]
Damn, I look good. Oh, everyone
looks good in couture, baby.
Oh, everyone looks good
in couture, baby. Everyone.
Couture, baby. Everyone. I
don't think I can do this.
Everyone. I don't think I can do this.
What? Come on, G!
I don't think I can do this. What?
Come on, G! Christmastime in the city is.
What? Come on, G! Christmastime in
the city is made for drunken mistakes.
Christmastime in the city is made for drunken
mistakes. But I'm not all the way
made for drunken mistakes.
But I'm not all the way single!
But I'm not all the way single!
Swerve. Don't waste that.
Single! Swerve. Don't waste that.
Hold up. Let me check it out.
Swerve. Don't waste that. Hold up. Let
me check it out. Checking. Mm-hmm. Hit it.
Hold up. Let me check it out. Checking.
Mm-hmm. Hit it. Uh-huh!
Checking. Mm-hmm. Hit it.
Uh-huh! Uh-huh!
Uh-huh! Uh-huh! I'm sorry.
House rules.
Uh-huh! I'm sorry. House rules.
We're hot, we're out.
I'm sorry. House rules. We're hot, we're
out. Girl, do not go Scrooge on me,
We're hot, we're out. Girl, do
not go Scrooge on me, please!
Girl, do not go Scrooge on me, please!
We need some Christmas cheer!
Please! We need some Christmas cheer!
At least some holiday.
We need some Christmas cheer! At least
some holiday somethin'-somethin'.
At least some holiday somethin'-somethin'.
You are so nasty.
Somethin'-somethin'. You are so nasty.
Franklin is...
You are so nasty.
Franklin is... Unh!
Franklin is... Unh! Don't
say that name. Come here.
Sit. Now, sweetheart, do you think
that Franklin is at home sulking.
Now, sweetheart, do you think that
Franklin is at home sulking over you, hmm?
That Franklin is at home sulking over
you, hmm? Let me think. No, I don't.
Over you, hmm? Let me think. No, I don't.
Actually, I highly doubt it.
Let me think. No, I don't. Actually, I highly
doubt it. Well, I'm just not feeling.
Actually, I highly doubt it.
Well, I'm just not feeling tonight.
Well, I'm just not feeling tonight.
I'll probably be a drag anyway.
Tonight. I'll probably be a drag anyway.
Nobody wants to see me face-down
I'll probably be a drag anyway. Nobody wants to
see me face-down at the bar, snotting and crying.
Nobody wants to see me face-down at the bar,
snotting and crying into my tequila shot.
At the bar, snotting and crying into my
tequila shot. Well, sweetheart, that's
into my tequila shot. Well, sweetheart,
that's where you're wrong because.
Well, sweetheart, that's where you're
wrong because tequila and tears go hand in
where you're wrong because tequila
and tears go hand in hand.
Tequila and tears go hand in hand.
Yes, they do.
Hand. Yes, they do.
These are big shots.
Yes, they do. These are big shots.
It's okay.
These are big shots. It's okay.
You're a big girl with big.
It's okay. You're a big
girl with big problems.
You're a big girl with big problems.
Cheers.
Problems. Cheers.
These are big shots.
Cheers. These are big shots.
It's okay, you can do it.
These are big shots. It's okay, you
can do it. Ooh, case in point about the.
It's okay, you can do it. Ooh, case in
point about the tequila... do you remember.
Ooh, case in point about the
tequila... do you remember Mexico?
Tequila... do you remember Mexico?
Yeah, you bought out the bar.
Mexico? Yeah, you bought
out the bar. Ahh!
Yeah, you bought out the bar. Ahh!
I swear to God, that was the.
Ahh! I swear to God, that was the
most fun we have ever had in our
I swear to God, that was the most fun
we have ever had in our whole lives.
Most fun we have ever had in our whole
lives. I mean, who knew that those
whole lives. I mean, who knew that
those twins did Cirque Du Soleil,
I mean, who knew that those twins
did Cirque Du Soleil, though?
Twins did Cirque Du Soleil, though?
It was the most fun you've
though? It was the most fun
you've ever had in your life.
It was the most fun you've ever had in
your life. While you were acrobatting, I
ever had in your life. While you were
acrobatting, I was at the bar downing shots,
While you were acrobatting, I was at the bar
downing shots, trying to get over the fact that
was at the bar downing shots, trying to get
over the fact that I had just broken off my
trying to get over the fact that I had
just broken off my engagement with Chris.
I had just broken off my engagement with
Chris. Who knew that I could bend
engagement with Chris. Who
knew that I could bend like that?
Who knew that I could bend like that?
My ears rang for two days.
Like that? My ears rang for two days.
My luggage got stolen.
My ears rang for two days. My luggage got
stolen. I spent 7 hours in Immigration.
My luggage got stolen. I spent 7 hours
in Immigration. Not as much fun for me.
I spent 7 hours in Immigration. Not as
much fun for me. [ Gasps ] Idea.
Not as much fun for me. [ Gasps ] Idea.
How about we book the Mayakoba.
[ Gasps ] Idea. How about we
book the Mayakoba for Spring Break?
How about we book the Mayakoba for Spring
Break? You just... You just don't
for Spring Break? You
just... You just don't quit.
You just... You just don't quit.
[ Scoffs ] Okay, fine. Fine.
Quit. [ Scoffs ] Okay, fine.
Fine. Such a party pooper.
[ Scoffs ] Okay, fine. Fine. Such a
party pooper. Well, thank you for.
Such a party pooper. Well,
thank you for understanding.
Well, thank you for understanding.
At least do another shot with
understanding. At least
do another shot with me?
At least do another shot with me?
Okay.
Me? Okay. Getting
drunk to stay home.
Okay. Getting drunk to stay home.
Cheers.
Getting drunk to stay home. Cheers.
Well, we're supposed to be.
Cheers. Well, we're
supposed to be going out.
Well, we're supposed
to be going out. Exactly.
Going out. Exactly. While
you sit here and be a.
Exactly. While you sit here and be a
bore, you can order room service.
While you sit here and be a bore, you can order
room service and the chef will be here to
bore, you can order room service and the chef
will be here to make you breakfast in the
and the chef will be here to make
you breakfast in the morning.
Make you breakfast in the morning.
[ Doorbell rings ]
Morning. [ Doorbell rings
] You order something?
[ Doorbell rings ] You order something?
Come in!
You order something? Come in!
Ooh! Thank you.
Come in! Ooh! Thank you.
[ Chuckles ]
Ooh! Thank you. [
Chuckles ] There you go.
[ Chuckles ] There you go.
Mm-hmm. Zip me up.
There you go. Mm-hmm. Zip me up.
Is she zipped?
Mm-hmm. Zip me up. Is she zipped?
Yeah.
Is she zipped? Yeah.
All right, give me smooches.
Yeah. All right, give me smooches.
Mwah! Love you.
All right, give me smooches. Mwah!
Love you. Love you. Have fun!
Mwah! Love you. Love you.
Have fun! You, too!
[ Gasps ] Oh, hey! I was just
coming to see you. Regina.
I was just coming to see you. Regina.
You look stunning.
Regina. You look stunning. Oh.
You look stunning. Oh.
I mean, blinding, actually.
Oh. I mean, blinding, actually.
The light refracting from your.
I mean, blinding, actually. The light
refracting from your sequins is... Wow.
The light refracting from your
sequins is... Wow. Oh, uh...
sequins is... Wow. Oh, uh...
Thank you.
Oh, uh... Thank you.
We just... We were...
Thank you. We just... We were
You know what, thank you.
We just... We were... You know
what, thank you. It's nothing.
You know what, thank you. It's nothing.
Look, I'm wondering why nobody's.
It's nothing. Look, I'm wondering why
nobody's snatched you up and thrown you.
Look, I'm wondering why nobody's snatched you up
and thrown you in a van and kidnapped you and
snatched you up and thrown you in a van
and kidnapped you and tied you up...
In a van and kidnapped you and tied
you up... Okay. That's creepy.
Tied you up... Okay. That's creepy.
It's not exactly what I...
Okay. That's creepy. It's not
exactly what I... The snatched...
It's not exactly what I... The
snatched... It's totally fine.
The snatched... It's totally fine.
Just could have stopped at.
It's totally fine. Just could
have stopped at "snatched you up."
Just could have stopped at "snatched
you up." You... You're welcome.
"Snatched you up." You... You're
welcome. I look forward to getting to.
You... You're welcome. I look forward
to getting to know my new neighbor.
I look forward to getting to know my new
neighbor. Well, on that note, do you
know my new neighbor. Well, on that
note, do you have a room service menu?
Well, on that note, do you have a
room service menu? Because I am starved.
Have a room service menu? Because I
am starved. Just in your pocket.
Because I am starved. Just in your pocket.
[ Laughs ]
Just in your pocket.
[ Laughs ] Okay.
[ Laughs ] Okay.
Let's get you some eats.
Okay. Let's get you some eats.
Can't keep a hungry woman.
Let's get you some eats. Can't
keep a hungry woman wanting, right?
Can't keep a hungry woman wanting, right?
[ Laughs ]
Wanting, right? [
Laughs ] Okay.
[ Laughs ] Okay. I
do magic tricks sometimes.
Okay. I do magic tricks sometimes.
It's okay. Come on in.
I do magic tricks sometimes.
It's okay. Come on in. Yeah, I...
It's okay. Come on in. Yeah, I
You should see what I can do.
Yeah, I... You should see
what I can do with quarters.
You should see what I can do with
quarters. You know what, that didn't come
with quarters. You know what, that
didn't come out right, either.
You know what, that didn't come out
right, either. All right, never mind.
Out right, either. All right, never mind.
[ Laughs ] So your Alpha.
All right, never mind. [ Laughs ]
So your Alpha brothers dared you?
[ Laughs ] So your Alpha brothers
dared you? Yes. Yes, yes, yes.
Brothers dared you? Yes. Yes, yes, yes.
So I told my MIT counselor that.
Yes. Yes, yes, yes. So I told my MIT counselor
that I wanted to switch my majors to.
So I told my MIT counselor that I wanted to
switch my majors to Women and Gender Studies.
I wanted to switch my majors to Women
and Gender Studies. [ Laughs ]
Women and Gender Studies. [
Laughs ] And that my alter ego.
[ Laughs ] And that my alter
ego Ursula... yes, Ursula from.
And that my alter ego Ursula... yes,
Ursula from "The Little Mermaid"... told me
Ursula... yes, Ursula from "The Little
Mermaid" told me that I wouldn't make it in.
"The Little Mermaid"... told me that I
wouldn't make it in Mathematical Economics.
That I wouldn't make it in Mathematical
Economics. So my counselor signed me up for.
Mathematical Economics. So my counselor
signed me up for a Psych Eval.
So my counselor signed me up for a
Psych Eval. Yes. [ Laughs ] Yes.
A Psych Eval. Yes. [ Laughs ] Yes.
As ridiculous as it may sound,
Yes. [ Laughs ] Yes. As ridiculous as
it may sound, you'd be surprised what.
As ridiculous as it may sound, you'd be
surprised what 10 one-hour sessions will do for
you'd be surprised what 10
one-hour sessions will do for you.
10 one-hour sessions will do for you.
No way!
You. No way! Yes way.
No way! Yes way. My
therapist was determined to.
Yes way. My therapist was determined
to get to the bottom of my gender.
My therapist was determined to get
to the bottom of my gender issues.
Get to the bottom of my gender issues.
Okay, so what did you end up
issues. Okay, so what
did you end up doing?
Okay, so what did you end up doing?
Well, uh, a little bit of
doing? Well, uh, a little bit of
this, a little bit of that, then.
Well, uh, a little bit of this, a little bit
of that, then I began to focus on engineering
this, a little bit of that, then I began to
focus on engineering and computer architecture.
I began to focus on engineering and computer
architecture. I found a way to increase the
and computer architecture. I found a way to
increase the speed in multi-core processors.
I found a way to increase the speed in
multi-core processors. Multi-core processors?
Speed in multi-core processors. Multi-core
processors? I increased the speed in.
Multi-core processors? I increased
the speed in operating systems.
I increased the speed in operating
systems. I make computers faster.
Operating systems. I make
computers faster. Oh!
I make computers faster. Oh!
Oh. Wow. That's nice of you.
Oh! Oh. Wow. That's nice of you.
Well, my accountant tends to.
Oh. Wow. That's nice of you. Well, my
accountant tends to think so, as well.
Well, my accountant tends to think so,
as well. Do you get girls with that
think so, as well. Do you
get girls with that tech talk?
Do you get girls with that tech talk?
All the time. [ Laughs ]
Tech talk? All the time. [ Laughs ] No.
No. Not one. Not at all.
All the time. [ Laughs ] No. No. Not
one. Not at all. I have, uh, no game.
No. No. Not one. Not at all. I have, uh,
no game. I have uh, Pop Warner game.
I have, uh, no game. I have uh, Pop
Warner game. But it's who I am.
I have uh, Pop Warner game. But it's who
I am. Like being a unique and amazing.
But it's who I am. Like being a unique
and amazing woman is who you are.
Like being a unique and amazing woman is who
you are. I thought you said you had no
woman is who you are. I thought
you said you had no game.
I thought you said you had no game.
That was pretty good.
Game. That was pretty good.
And you just met me.
That was pretty good. And you just met me.
And I'm crushing it.
And you just met me. And I'm
crushing it. Now, that's power.
And I'm crushing it. Now, that's power.
Mm, that's Cabernet.
Now, that's power. Mm,
that's Cabernet. Touch.
Mm, that's Cabernet. Touch.
Speaking of which, let's go.
Touch. Speaking of which, let's
go ahead and, uh, top you off.
Speaking of which, let's go ahead and,
uh, top you off. [ Cellphone vibrating ]
You gonna get that? Regina.
Uh, no. No, no. I...
Regina. Uh, no. No, no.
I... Yes, to the Cabernet.
Uh, no. No, no. I... Yes, to the
Cabernet. [ Chuckles ] All right.
Yes, to the Cabernet. [
Chuckles ] All right. To Ursula.
Regina, it's me. I have
some papers for you to sign.
I have some papers for you to sign.
I swung by the house, but you
sign. I swung by the house,
but you weren't there.
I swung by the house, but you
weren't there. Where are you?
Weren't there. Where are you?
You know what, just, um...
Where are you? You know what, just, um...
Just call me.
No, don't put more whipped cream on it!
Ugh. Yes. Yes. Yes. [ Laughs ]
Cream on it! Ugh. Yes. Yes.
Yes. [ Laughs ] Ugh.
Yes. Yes. Yes. [ Laughs ] Ugh.
You better be happy it's.
Ugh. You better be
happy it's Christmas.
You better be happy it's Christmas.
All right.
Christmas. All right. Mm.
God, I love Christmas.
All right. Mm. God, I love Christmas.
It's gonna be different this.
Mm. God, I love Christmas. It's
gonna be different this year, though.
It's gonna be different this year, though.
I guess it's gonna be different
year, though. I guess it's gonna
be different every year after...
I guess it's gonna be different every year
after... [ Chuckles ] You're very cute
every year after... [ Chuckles
] You're very cute when you chew.
[ Chuckles ] You're very cute when
you chew. Franklin used to always...
When you chew. Franklin
used to always... Sorry.
Franklin used to always... Sorry.
[ Clears throat ] You don't.
Sorry. [ Clears throat ]
You don't have to be sorry.
[ Clears throat ] You don't
have to be sorry. Um...
have to be sorry. Um... Franklin
he was your husband?
Um... Franklin... he was your husband?
Is. Six years.
Franklin... he was your husband? Is.
Six years. And 19 more days.
Is. Six years. And 19 more days.
Look, I'm sorry, this is all new.
And 19 more days. Look, I'm sorry, this
is all new to me, and so far, it sucks.
Look, I'm sorry, this is all new to me, and so
far, it sucks. Yeah, well, I could teach you
to me, and so far, it sucks. Yeah, well, I
could teach you a thing or two about that.
Yeah, well, I could teach you a thing
or two about that. Oh, really?
A thing or two about that. Oh, really?
No. No, no, no, no.
Oh, really? No. No, no, no, no.
That's not... [ Laughs ]
No. No, no, no, no. That's not
[ Laughs ] That's not, uh...
That's not... [ Laughs ] That's not, uh...
That's not what I was talking.
That's not, uh... That's not
what I was talking about.
That's not what I was talking about.
Dessert preference.
About. Dessert preference.
It's a great way to determine.
Dessert preference. It's a great
way to determine compatibility.
It's a great way to determine
compatibility. You know what, it's okay,
compatibility. You know what, it's
okay, Ulysses, it's getting late.
You know what, it's okay, Ulysses,
it's getting late. Listen. Apple pie.
Ulysses, it's getting late. Listen.
Apple pie. No.
Listen. Apple pie. No.
Lemon meringue.
No. Lemon meringue. Yes.
Lemon meringue. Yes.
Cheesecake?
Yes. Cheesecake?
Just the crust.
Cheesecake? Just the crust.
Chocolate cake.
Just the crust. Chocolate cake.
Oh, murder for it.
Chocolate cake. Oh, murder for it.
There it is... total match.
Oh, murder for it. There
it is... total match. [ Laughs ]
There it is... total match. [
Laughs ] My parents used to share.
[ Laughs ] My parents
used to share dessert.
My parents used to share dessert.
I always thought it was so
dessert. I always thought
it was so romantic.
I always thought it was so romantic.
I knew even from a little kid
romantic. I knew even from a little
kid that they loved each other very
I knew even from a little kid that
they loved each other very much.
That they loved each other very much.
Where are they?
Much. Where are they?
Connecticut.
Where are they? Connecticut.
Franklin and I used to spend.
Connecticut. Franklin and I
used to spend Christmas Day there.
Franklin and I used to spend Christmas
Day there. And this year?
Christmas Day there. And this year?
Oh, I don't know what.
And this year? Oh, I don't know
what Christmas is gonna be like.
Oh, I don't know what Christmas
is gonna be like. Looks like alone.
Christmas is gonna be like. Looks
like alone. Who says it has to be?
Looks like alone. Who says it has to be?
[ Door opens ]
Who says it has to be? [ Door
opens ] I'm back, bitches!
[ Door opens ] I'm back, bitches!
Turn up!
I'm back, bitches! Turn up!
Whoa! What are you...
Turn up! Whoa! What
are you... Turn up!
Whoa! What are you... Turn up!
Ms. McDonald ordered pizza,
Turn up! Ms. McDonald ordered
pizza, liquor, and some props.
Ms. McDonald ordered pizza, liquor, and
some props. We about to get lit!
Liquor, and some props. We
about to get lit! Trish...
We about to get lit! Trish...
Litter?
Trish... Litter? Trish.
Litter? Trish. Well,
girl, you didn't want.
Trish. Well, girl, you didn't
want to come to the party, so I.
Well, girl, you didn't want to come to
the party, so I brought the party to you.
To come to the party, so I brought the
party to you. You could have texted.
Brought the party to you. You could
have texted. I'm sorry... Oh!
You could have texted. I'm sorry
Oh! Am I interrupting something?
I'm sorry... Oh! Am I interrupting
something? No. No! Of course not.
Am I interrupting something? No. No! Of
course not. We're just having a talk with.
No. No! Of course not. We're
just having a talk with ice cream.
We're just having a talk
with ice cream. Just...
Ice cream. Just... Well,
no, wait, wait, wait.
Just... Well, no, wait, wait, wait.
It could be something that we.
Well, no, wait, wait, wait. It could
be something that we could revisit later.
It could be something that we could revisit
later. You don't have to say that in
could revisit later. You don't
have to say that in front of her.
You don't have to say that in front
of her. Yo! They keep coming in!
Front of her. Yo! They keep coming in!
This party about to be lit!
Yo! They keep coming in! This
party about to be lit! Okay!
This party about to be lit! Okay!
How many people did you.
Okay! How many
people did you invite?
How many people did you invite?
The whole damn club.
Invite? The whole damn club.
Girl, we goin' OT... overtime.
The whole damn club. Girl, we goin'
OT... overtime. Overtime! Overtime!
Girl, we goin' OT... overtime. Overtime!
Overtime! Okay, I need some air.
Overtime! Overtime! Okay, I need some
air. Well, we can go to my place.
Okay, I need some air. Well, we
can go to my place. I have a balcony.
Well, we can go to my place.
I have a balcony. Thank you.
I have a balcony. Thank you.
All right.
Thank you. All right.
Swerve. No, you don't.
All right. Swerve. No, you don't.
Where you going?
Swerve. No, you don't. Where you going?
To get air.
Where you going? To get air.
Mnh-mnh. Give me a dance.
To get air. Mnh-mnh. Give me a dance.
One dance. Back it up. One time.
Mnh-mnh. Give me a dance. One dance. Back it
up. One time. You know she's not gonna.
One dance. Back it up. One time.
You know she's not gonna quit, right?
You know she's not gonna quit, right?
If you can't beat 'em, join
quit, right? If you
can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
Come on.
'Em. Come on. It's
about to get lit
Come on. It's about
to get lit Whoa
It's about to get lit
Whoa Hey, yeah
Whoa Hey, yeah
Hey, yeah
Hold on, man.
Hold on, man.
What's the password?
Hold on, man. What's the password?
All right, now you're speaking.
What's the password? All right, now
you're speaking my language. [ Laughs ]
All right, now you're speaking my language.
[ Laughs ] Have a good time. Here you go.
My language. [ Laughs ] Have a good time.
Here you go. Christmas lights in my mama's
Have a good time. Here you go.
Christmas lights in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's
house Christmas lights
in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's
house Christmas lights
in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's
house Christmas lights
in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my
mama's house Yeah
Christmas lights
in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's
house Christmas lights
in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's
house Christmas lights
in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's house
Christmas lights in my mama's
house Christmas lights
in my mama's house
Christmas lights in
my mama's house
I saw you checking for me.
Uh, who are you? I'm for you.
Uh, who are you? I'm for you.
I floss every day, but I am not.
I'm for you. I floss every
day, but I am not a dentist!
I floss every day, but I am
not a dentist! [ Laughs ]
A dentist! [ Laughs
] Okay, listen.
[ Laughs ] Okay, listen.
Dontrella.
Okay, listen. Dontrella.
Okay, Don... Wait, really?
Dontrella. Okay, Don... Wait, really?
Trella. Dontrella, baby.
Okay, Don... Wait, really? Trella.
Dontrella, baby. Okay, you...
Trella. Dontrella, baby. Okay, you
You are an absolutely beautiful.
Okay, you... You are an
absolutely beautiful woman, you are.
You are an absolutely beautiful woman,
you are. I woke up like this, baby.
Woman, you are. I woke up
like this, baby. [ Laughs ]
I woke up like this, baby. [
Laughs ] You want to make a Snapchat,
[ Laughs ] You want to
make a Snapchat, or nah?
You want to make a Snapchat, or nah?
I'ma say nah.
Or nah? I'ma say nah.
Okay. Um...
I'ma say nah. Okay. Um...
Well, uh, how about this?
[ Giggles ] All I need is 10 minutes,
'cause I am really feelin' this.
All I need is 10 minutes, 'cause I am really
feelin' this. Okay, you know what, I might
I am really feelin' this. Okay, you know
what, I might need to rethink that Snap, but.
Okay, you know what, I might need to rethink
that Snap, but just... I need you to stand
need to rethink that Snap, but just... I
need you to stand right here and be still.
Just... I need you to stand
right here and be still. Oh.
Right here and be still. Oh.
Well, hi, Franklin.
Oh. Well, hi, Franklin.
I didn't realize you were.
Well, hi, Franklin. I didn't
realize you were invited.
I didn't realize you were invited.
Well, it's the holidays.
Invited. Well, it's the holidays.
I didn't see any harm in.
Well, it's the holidays. I didn't
see any harm in celebrating with you.
I didn't see any harm in celebrating with
you. I mean, technically, you are my
celebrating with you. I mean, technically,
you are my wife for another 19 days.
I mean, technically, you are my wife for another
19 days. Well, this won't be our usual
wife for another 19 days. Well, this won't
be our usual Christmas countdown, but...
Well, this won't be our usual Christmas
countdown, but... Yeah, I mean...
Christmas countdown, but...
Yeah, I mean... Mm.
Yeah, I mean... Mm.
Don't, Franklin.
Mm. Don't, Franklin. What?
Don't, Franklin. What?
That look.
What? That look. You
know it's not gonna work.
That look. You know it's not gonna work.
Wait. She bae?
You know it's not gonna work. Wait.
She bae? It might be Christmas, but.
Wait. She bae? It might be Christmas,
but it's not Christmas for you and.
It might be Christmas, but it's
not Christmas for you and me.
It's not Christmas for you and me.
'Cause this is...
me. 'Cause this is...
Uh... Ulysses!
'Cause this is... Uh...
Ulysses! Yeah.
Uh... Ulysses! Yeah.
He and I are spending.
Yeah. He and I are
spending Christmas together.
He and I are spending Christmas
together. Well, pleasure to meet you,
Christmas together. Well,
pleasure to meet you, man.
Well, pleasure to meet you, man.
No, it's not a pleasure to
man. No, it's not a
pleasure to meet him.
No, it's not a pleasure to meet him.
Okay, it's not a pleasure to
meet him. Okay, it's not
a pleasure to meet him?
Okay, it's not a pleasure to meet him?
We're on a different team.
Meet him? We're on a different team.
Okay.
We're on a different team. Okay.
Well, you know what, Regina,
Okay. Well, you know what, Regina,
this right here, is my friend...
Well, you know what, Regina, this right
here, is my friend... Dontrella.
This right here, is my friend...
Dontrella. Don... Really?
Dontrella. Don... Really?
Trella. Dontrella.
Don... Really? Trella.
Dontrella. [ Giggles ]
Trella. Dontrella. [ Giggles
] Don't you touch her hand.
[ Giggles ] Don't you touch her hand.
She reached out to me.
Don't you touch her hand. She
reached out to me. My team.
She reached out to me. My team.
You're right.
My team. You're right.
Great to meet you.
You're right. Great to meet you.
That is a lovely name.
Great to meet you. That is a lovely
name. Thanks, uh, I actually had to.
That is a lovely name. Thanks, uh, I
actually had to change my name because my.
Thanks, uh, I actually had to change my name
because my family's church people and they
change my name because my family's church
people and they don't approve of my career.
Family's church people and they don't
approve of my career. Imagine that.
Don't approve of my career. Imagine
that. Exactly what is your line of.
Imagine that. Exactly what is
your line of work, Dontrella?
Exactly what is your line of work,
Dontrella? Okay, you know what, she...
Work, Dontrella? Okay, you know what,
she... Okay, she can answer for.
Okay, you know what, she... Okay, she can
answer for herself 'cause it's Dontrella's.
Okay, she can answer for herself
'cause it's Dontrella's line of work.
Herself 'cause it's Dontrella's
line of work. Uh, I like you.
Line of work. Uh, I like you.
And I like you, too.
Uh, I like you. And I like you, too.
Uh, I'm a dancer.
And I like you, too. Uh, I'm a
dancer. I just did Slim Sham's new music.
Uh, I'm a dancer. I just did Slim Sham's
new music video, "Santa's Got a Booty."
I just did Slim Sham's new music video,
"Santa's Got a Booty." Have you seen it?
Video, "Santa's Got a Booty." Have
you seen it? No, I haven't.
Have you seen it? No, I haven't.
It's funny, 'cause I love.
No, I haven't. It's funny, 'cause
I love Christmas music, so I can't.
It's funny, 'cause I love
Christmas music, so I can't wait.
Christmas music, so I can't wait.
Hey, hey!
Wait. Hey, hey! Let
me give you a preview.
Hey, hey! Let me give you a preview.
Oh, please, God. No, don't.
Let me give you a preview. Oh, please,
God. No, don't. Santa's got the booty,
Oh, please, God. No, don't. Santa's
got the booty, and the booty right here
Santa's got the booty, and the booty
right here Rock up to his sleigh,
and the booty right here Rock up to his
sleigh, he don't need it right there
Rock up to his sleigh, he don't need
it right there That was classy.
He don't need it right there
That was classy. Thank you.
That was classy. Thank you.
Yeah.
Thank you. Yeah. Wow.
Yeah. Wow. I guess it
was just much easier.
Wow. I guess it was just much easier
for her to change her name than
I guess it was just much easier for her to change
her name than for her entire family to change
for her to change her name than for
her entire family to change theirs.
For her entire family to change theirs.
Okay, well, you know what,
theirs. Okay, well, you know
what, what does Mr. Ulysses do?
Okay, well, you know what, what does Mr.
Ulysses do? Ulysses...
What does Mr. Ulysses do?
Ulysses... He...
Ulysses... He... He's...
He is a person who made.
He... He's... He is a person who
made the thingy that makes the.
He's... He is a person who made the thingy
that makes the computers go faster.
The thingy that makes the computers
go faster. Well, my technology...
Computers go faster. Well, my
technology... Fascinating.
Well, my technology... Fascinating.
Well, listen, my invention.
Fascinating. Well, listen, my
invention paved the way for dual-core,
Well, listen, my invention paved the way
for dual-core, quad-cores, hepta-cores, and
paved the way for dual-core, quad-cores,
hepta-cores, and octa-core processors, fielding
quad-cores, hepta-cores, and octa-core processors,
fielding programmable rays with thousands
octa-core processors, fielding programmable rays
with thousands of effective independent core
programmable rays with thousands of
effective independent core processors.
Of effective independent core processors.
Okay, bro, you're smart.
Processors. Okay, bro, you're smart.
You're really smart. We get it.
Okay, bro, you're smart. You're really smart.
We get it. But this isn't Silicon Valley,
You're really smart. We get it. But this
isn't Silicon Valley, so nobody cares.
But this isn't Silicon Valley, so
nobody cares. Are you sure?
So nobody cares. Are you sure?
'Cause you are standing next to.
Are you sure? 'Cause you are standing
next to the dumbed-down version of.
'Cause you are standing next to the
dumbed-down version of Nicki Minaj.
The dumbed-down version of Nicki Minaj.
[ Gasps ] Thank you.
Nicki Minaj. [ Gasps ] Thank you.
Yeah, to think that's a.
[ Gasps ] Thank you. Yeah, to think
that's a compliment, you sure can pick.
Yeah, to think that's a compliment,
you sure can pick them, Franklin.
Compliment, you sure can pick them,
Franklin. Regina, if you spent half the
them, Franklin. Regina, if you spent
half the time that you spent in my.
Regina, if you spent half the time that
you spent in my business managing your own
time that you spent in my business
managing your own affairs...
business managing your own affairs...
You know what, I don't have
affairs... You know what,
I don't have affairs!
You know what, I don't have affairs!
That's your road to hoe,
affairs! That's your road to hoe,
Franklin, and you ho it well!
That's your road to hoe, Franklin,
and you ho it well! Give me that.
Franklin, and you ho it well!
Give me that. Ahh!
Give me that. Ahh! Let's go, Ulysses.
We out.
Selfie! Oh, wait, I'm more
poppin' from this angle.
Oh, wait, I'm more poppin' from this angle.
Wassup? [ Laughs ]
You sure you're still over him?
Absolutely.
Him? Absolutely. You saw
the way I treated him.
Absolutely. You saw the way I treated
him. Yeah, well, my mom used to.
You saw the way I treated him. Yeah, well,
my mom used to say "If you're still fighting",
Yeah, well, my mom used to say "If you're
still fighting, you're still loving."
Can you please stop cleaning? Can you please
stop drinking? The housekeeper's gonna be.
Can you please stop drinking? The housekeeper's
gonna be here in less than an hour, and.
The housekeeper's gonna be here in less
than an hour, and she expects a mess.
Here in less than an hour, and she
expects a mess. Don't disappoint her.
She expects a mess. Don't disappoint her.
You know, I was starting to.
Don't disappoint her. You know, I was
starting to finally have a great time, and.
You know, I was starting to finally have a great
time, and then he had to go and ruin it by
finally have a great time, and then he had
to go and ruin it by bringing his ho date!
Then he had to go and ruin it by bringing
his ho date! [ Laughing ] Calm down.
Bringing his ho date! [ Laughing ]
Calm down. That was not even his date.
[ Laughing ] Calm down. That was not even
his date. What are you talking about?
That was not even his date. What are you
talking about? That girl's a dancer at the.
What are you talking about? That
girl's a dancer at the bar downtown.
That girl's a dancer at the bar
downtown. Well, then why did he have to
bar downtown. Well, then why
did he have to go and lie?
Well, then why did he have
to go and lie? I don't know!
Go and lie? I don't know!
Maybe the same reason why you.
I don't know! Maybe the same reason
why you shoved Ulysses all in his face.
Maybe the same reason why you shoved Ulysses all
in his face. You want to make him jealous
Shoved Ulysses all in his face. You
want to make him jealous [ Scoffs ]
You want to make him jealous
[ Scoffs ] What is this?
[ Scoffs ] What is this?
I don't know. Never seen it.
It's the papers for the house. Franklin
must have left it... In my plant?
Franklin must have left it... In
my plant? It's the appraisal.
In my plant? It's the appraisal.
We were supposed to get it done.
It's the appraisal. We were supposed to
get it done before we put the house up for.
We were supposed to get it done
before we put the house up for sale.
Before we put the house up for sale.
Damn.
Sale. Damn. It really is over.
Damn. It really is over.
Hey, I know this is hard, G,
It really is over. Hey, I know this is
hard, G, but, you know, change might be a.
Hey, I know this is hard, G, but, you
know, change might be a good thing.
But, you know, change might be a good
thing. Besides, being single does have
good thing. Besides, being
single does have its perks.
Besides, being single does
have its perks. Hey.
Its perks. Hey. Hey, baby.
Hey. Hey, baby.
Toothbrushes are to the right of.
Hey, baby. Toothbrushes are to the
right of the sink in the drawer right.
Toothbrushes are to the right of the
sink in the drawer right there.
The sink in the drawer right there.
Thanks.
There. Thanks. And
there's coffee in the.
Thanks. And there's
coffee in the kitchen.
And there's coffee in the kitchen.
[ Chuckles ]
Kitchen. [ Chuckles ] Hey.
[ Chuckles ] Hey. Mouthwash?
Hey. Mouthwash?
Next to the toothbrush.
What? It was a busy night. Okay,
I been out of the game too long.
Okay, I been out of the game too long.
The sharks are gonna eat me
too long. The sharks are
gonna eat me alive.
The sharks are gonna eat me alive.
Oh, there, there.
Alive. Oh, there, there. You'll survive.
You know why?
Oh, there, there. You'll survive. You
know why? Because I'll be your captain.
You'll survive. You know why? Because I'll be
your captain. Yeah, and then push-up bras and.
Because I'll be your captain. Yeah, and then
push-up bras and vodka, that could be your chum!
Yeah, and then push-up bras and vodka, that
could be your chum! It's a joke, G! I'm joking!
Vodka, that could be your chum! It's a joke, G!
I'm joking! Look, you do not have to be like.
It's a joke, G! I'm joking! Look,
you do not have to be like me.
Look, you do not have to be like me.
All these years we've been
me. All these years we've been
friends, we're completely.
All these years we've been friends,
we're completely different.
Friends, we're completely different.
All you need to do is what's
different. All you need to
do is what's best for you.
All you need to do is what's best for you.
You know what, you're right.
Best for you. You know what, you're
right. And I've always known that.
You know what, you're right. And I've
always known that Franklin is best for me.
And I've always known that Franklin is best
for me. If I speak to him, maybe we can
Franklin is best for me. If I speak to him,
maybe we can squash this before it goes too.
If I speak to him, maybe we can
squash this before it goes too far.
Squash this before it goes too far.
Yeah, well, you know what,
far. Yeah, well, you
know what, tick-tock.
Yeah, well, you know what, tick-tock.
Christmas is right around the
tick-tock. Christmas is
right around the corner.
Franklin, I just came by to discuss
the terms of the... Oh, what the hell?
Discuss the terms of the... Oh,
what the hell? Baby, no, no!
Oh, what the hell? Baby, no, no!
This is not what it looks like,
Baby, no, no! This is not
what it looks like, okay?
This is not what it looks like, okay?
She lost a contact lens.
Okay? She lost a contact lens.
In your crotch?!
She lost a contact lens.
In your crotch?! [ Scoffs ]
I found it.
We have to really
stop meeting like this.
We have to really stop meeting
like this. [ Laughs ]
Meeting like this. [
Laughs ] [ Chuckles ]
[ Laughs ] [ Chuckles ]
You know what, I owe you an.
[ Chuckles ] You know
what, I owe you an apology.
You know what, I owe you an apology.
No. No, no, no, no. No need.
Apology. No. No, no, no, no. No need.
No, you've been nothing but.
No. No, no, no, no. No need. No, you've been
nothing but kind to me, and I was completely.
No, you've been nothing but kind to me, and
I was completely rude to you last night.
Kind to me, and I was completely rude to you
last night. It was wrong of me to use you to
rude to you last night. It was wrong
of me to use you to make my hus...
It was wrong of me to use you to make my
hus... my ex-husband jealous, and I'm
make my hus... my ex-husband
jealous, and I'm sorry.
My ex-husband jealous, and I'm sorry.
Well, I accept your apology.
Sorry. Well, I accept your apology.
Are you always so agreeable?
Well, I accept your apology. Are
you always so agreeable? [ Laughs ]
Are you always so agreeable?
[ Laughs ] Eh, well, I try to be.
[ Laughs ] Eh, well, I try to be.
God, it's been a long day.
Eh, well, I try to be. God, it's been a
long day. I could use a hot bath and a.
God, it's been a long day. I could
use a hot bath and a cold Chardonnay.
I could use a hot bath and a cold
Chardonnay. That sounds fun.
Cold Chardonnay. That sounds fun.
I mean... Wait, wait, wait,
That sounds fun. I mean...
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
I mean... Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
No, uh, I...
Wait, wait. No, uh, I... It
does sound fun... fun for.
No, uh, I... It does sound fun
fun for you, not, like...
It does sound fun... fun for
you, not, like... It's fine.
You, not, like... It's fine.
You know what, these are for.
It's fine. You know
what, these are for you.
You know what, these are for you.
Thank you.
You. Thank you. I
love poinsettias.
Thank you. I love poinsettias.
Can I ask you a question?
I love poinsettias. Can I ask you a
question? Why do you live in a hotel?
Can I ask you a question? Why do you live
in a hotel? Okay, um, well, you need.
Why do you live in a hotel? Okay, um, well,
you need roots to settle down, and, uh, I.
Okay, um, well, you need roots to settle down,
and, uh, I have yet to find those roots.
Roots to settle down, and, uh, I have yet
to find those roots. But you know what...
have yet to find those roots. But
you know what... I'm working on it.
Hey. Check these out. You
have handcuffs in your pockets.
You have handcuffs in your pockets.
[ Laughs ] These are Houdini
pockets. [ Laughs ] These
are Houdini handcuffs.
[ Laughs ] These are Houdini handcuffs.
That's better.
Handcuffs. That's better.
You want to see how they.
That's better. You
want to see how they work?
You want to see how they work?
No, I'm good.
Work? No, I'm good. Yes, you do.
Yes, you do.
No, I'm good. Yes, you do.
Yes, you do. No. It's okay.
Yes, you do. Yes, you do. No.
It's okay. We got time before the.
No. It's okay. We got
time before the elevator comes.
We got time before the elevator comes.
Here we go. Look.
Elevator comes. Here we go.
Look. [ Laughs ]
Here we go. Look. [
Laughs ] All right.
[ Laughs ] All right.
Oh, my God.
All right. Oh, my God.
That is so rapey.
Oh, my God. That is so rapey.
[ Laughs ]
That is so rapey.
[ Laughs ] Okay.
[ Laughs ] Okay. All right.
You ready?
Okay. All right. You ready?
All right, here we go.
All right. You ready? All
right, here we go. 1... 2... Pow!
Wow! [ Laughs ] That
was actually impressive.
[ Laughs ] That was actually
impressive. You like that?
That was actually impressive.
You like that? Yeah!
You like that? Yeah!
Do you know any more tricks?
Yeah! Do you know any more tricks?
Oh, I know a lot of tricks.
Do you know any more tricks? Oh, I know
a lot of tricks. I mean... [ Laughs ]
Oh, I know a lot of tricks. I mean... [
Laughs ] I... I could show you, if you'd
I mean... [ Laughs ] I... I could
show you, if you'd like to see magic.
I... I could show you, if you'd
like to see magic. If you like...
like to see magic. If you like...
[ Elevator dings ]
If you like... [ Elevator dings
] Nah, it's okay. I'm cool.
[ Elevator dings ] Nah, it's okay.
I'm cool. Well, maybe next time.
Nah, it's okay. I'm cool. Well,
maybe next time. Next time, next time.
Well, maybe next time. Next time,
next time. You know what, don't...
Next time, next time. You know
what, don't... Don't forget these.
You know what, don't... Don't forget these.
So sweet. Thank you.
Don't forget these. So sweet. Thank you.
Yeah. Ladies first.
[ Ringing ] Baby,
I'm in the lobby.
[ Ringing ] Baby, I'm in the lobby.
We need to talk, all right?
Baby, I'm in the lobby. We need to talk,
all right? What we had, we can't lose this.
We need to talk, all right? What we had, we
can't lose this. I'm never gonna stop...
What we had, we can't lose this.
I'm never gonna stop... Wow.
I'm never gonna stop... Wow.
Doesn't this place just give you.
Wow. Doesn't this place
just give you life?
If you're happy with your message,
press 1. To record a new message,
message, press 1. To record
a new message, press 2.
To record a new message, press 2.
Regina, you need to call me.
Press 2. Regina, you need to call me.
This is Franklin.
Regina, you need to call me. This is
Franklin. Hark! The herald angels
This is Franklin. Hark!
The herald angels sing
Hark! The herald angels sing
Glory to the new-born King
Sing Glory to the new-born
King Peace on earth and mercy
Glory to the new-born King
Peace on earth and mercy mild
Peace on earth and mercy mild
God and sinners reconciled
Mild God and sinners reconciled
Joyful, all ye nations, rise
God and sinners reconciled Joyful, all
ye nations, rise Join the triumph of the
Joyful, all ye nations, rise
Join the triumph of the skies
Join the triumph of the skies
With angelic host proclaim
Skies With angelic host proclaim
Christ is born in Bethlehem
With angelic host proclaim Christ is
born in Bethlehem Hark! The herald angels
Christ is born in Bethlehem Hark!
The herald angels sing
Hark! The herald angels sing
Glory to the new-born King
Sing Glory to the new-born King
[ Laughs ] Well, thank you
Glory to the new-born King [
Laughs ] Well, thank you for dinner.
[ Laughs ] Well, thank you for dinner.
You're welcome.
For dinner. You're welcome.
Oh. [ Laughs ]
You're welcome. Oh. [
Laughs ] Good night, sweetie.
Oh. [ Laughs ] Good night, sweetie.
Good night.
[ Laughs ] Thank you.
You're welcome.
Thank you. You're welcome.
Yeah! Yes! Whoo!
You're welcome. Yeah! Yes! Whoo!
[ Exhales sharply, laughs ]
Hey, Trish. Shh.
Not so loud.
Hey, Trish. Shh. Not so loud.
Girl, he just fell asleep.
Shh. Not so loud. Girl, he just
fell asleep. He just kept going.
Girl, he just fell asleep. He just
kept going. "Blah, blah, blah, blah."
He just kept going. "Blah, blah, blah,
blah." Tell me, for real, how was your,
"Blah, blah, blah, blah." Tell me, for real,
how was your, uh, date with the rebound guy?
Tell me, for real, how was your, uh, date with
the rebound guy? He's not a rebound guy.
Uh, date with the rebound guy? He's not
a rebound guy. Yes, he was. I mean...
He's not a rebound guy. Yes, he was.
I mean... You're bouncing on him to make.
Yes, he was. I mean... You're bouncing on
him to make the other one bounce around in.
You're bouncing on him to make the
other one bounce around in jealousy?
The other one bounce around in jealousy?
A rebound.
Jealousy? A rebound.
It's not like that.
A rebound. It's not like that.
Ulysses is different.
It's not like that. Ulysses
is different. He's... nice.
Ulysses is different. He's... nice.
[ Snorts ] Girl, bye.
He's... nice. [ Snorts ] Girl, bye.
Nice is the kiss of death, okay?
[ Snorts ] Girl, bye. Nice is the
kiss of death, okay? You see him?
Nice is the kiss of death, okay?
You see him? He ain't nice.
You see him? He ain't nice. He fine.
But he ain't nice.
He ain't nice. He fine. But he ain't nice.
Well, it's better to be with.
He fine. But he ain't nice. Well, it's
better to be with a man who is safe and.
Well, it's better to be with a
man who is safe and considerate.
A man who is safe and considerate.
I should know, I was married to
considerate. I should know, I was
married to a guy who was wild and
I should know, I was married to a
guy who was wild and inconsiderate.
A guy who was wild and inconsiderate.
Well, I'm just saying, watch
inconsiderate. Well, I'm just
saying, watch out for the nerd, girl,
Well, I'm just saying, watch out for the
nerd, girl, 'cause he's falling... hard.
Out for the nerd, girl, 'cause he's
falling... hard. It's not that serious.
'Cause he's falling... hard.
It's not that serious. It can't be.
It's not that serious.
It can't be. Can it?
It can't be. Can it? Right?
Can it? Right? No.
Right? No. Right?
Wow. I don't have any breath left.
You like this?
I don't have any breath left.
You like this? I'm in awe.
You like this? I'm in awe.
Well, you look very handsome.
I'm in awe. Well, you look
very handsome. Champagne?
Well, you look very handsome.
Champagne? Thank you.
Champagne? Thank you.
This, um...
Thank you. This, um...
This Christmas, I didn't...
This, um... This Christmas, I didn't
I really didn't think it was,
This Christmas, I didn't... I really didn't
think it was, uh, gonna be this special.
I really didn't think it was, uh, gonna be
this special. Well, Ulysses, you have made
uh, gonna be this special. Well, Ulysses,
you have made my stay at the Chesterton worth.
Well, Ulysses, you have made my stay
at the Chesterton worth every minute.
My stay at the Chesterton worth every
minute. You really mean that, Regina?
Every minute. You really mean
that, Regina? Yeah, I guess I do.
You really mean that, Regina? Yeah, I
guess I do. I guess, um, it's cool to.
Yeah, I guess I do. I guess, um, it's
cool to date something that, uh, knows.
I guess, um, it's cool to date something that,
uh, knows I'm a nerd and could care less.
Date something that, uh, knows I'm a nerd and
could care less. See, but you're more than
I'm a nerd and could care less.
See, but you're more than that.
See, but you're more than that.
You're smart, stable,
that. You're smart,
stable, dependable...
You're smart, stable, dependable...
None of that is sexy.
Dependable... None of that is sexy.
It is to me.
[ Chuckles ] Thank you. A rose by
any other name... Ah, Shakespeare.
A rose by any other name...
Ah, Shakespeare. Thank you.
Ah, Shakespeare. Thank you.
May I?
Thank you. May I?
"My love's eyes.
May I? "My love's eyes
look nothing like the sun."
"My love's eyes look nothing like the sun.
Coral is by far more red"
look nothing like the sun. Coral
is by far more red than her lips.
Coral is by far more red than her lips.
If snow be white,
than her lips. If snow be white,
why then her breasts be dun.
If snow be white, why then her
breasts be dun. If hair is wired,
"why then her breasts be dun. If hair is
wired, black wires grow from her head."
"If hair is wired, black wires grow from
her head." Okay, yeah, I don't really
"black wires grow from her head." Okay, yeah,
I don't really know where this is going, but...
Okay, yeah, I don't really know where
this is going, but... Hold on.
Know where this is going, but...
Hold on. Hold up.
Hold on. Hold up. "My
love, when she walks."
Hold up. "My love, when she
walks treads the ground."
"My love, when she walks treads the ground.
And yet, by heaven,"
treads the ground. And yet, by heaven,
I think my love as rare as any.
"And yet, by heaven, I think my love as
rare as any she belied with false compare."
"I think my love as rare as any she belied with
false compare." [ Laughs ] And there it is.
Okay, then.
That was nice. Well, look, there's more.
Um, look, I just...
Well, look, there's more. Um, look, I
just... I just have to get it all out.
Um, look, I just... I just
have to get it all out. Um...
I just have to get it all out. Um...
I got to grab my opportunity.
Um... I got to grab my opportunity.
Um...
I got to grab my opportunity.
Um... Ulysses.
Um... Ulysses. You
are an amazing woman.
Ulysses. You are an amazing woman.
Look, I can't think of another.
You are an amazing woman. Look, I can't think
of another woman that I'd want to spend my.
Look, I can't think of another woman that
I'd want to spend my days and nights with.
Woman that I'd want to spend my days and
nights with. Since you stepped into my life,
days and nights with. Since you stepped into
my life, everything has become brighter.
Since you stepped into my life, everything
has become brighter. It just feels better.
Everything has become brighter. It just
feels better. Since the day I met you,
It just feels better. Since the day
I met you, I knew you were special.
Since the day I met you, I knew you
were special. But now I know...
I knew you were special. But now I know...
that I love you.
But now I know... that I love you.
[ Sighs ]
That I love you. [
Sighs ] So, Regina...
[ Sighs ] So, Regina...
Will you marry me?
So, Regina... Will you marry me?
[ Sighs ] I...
Will you marry me? [
Sighs ] I... Regina.
[ Sighs ] I... Regina.
[ Gasps ]
Regina. [ Gasps ] Yes.
[ Gasps ] Yes. [ Laughs ] Yes?
Yes. [ Laughs ] Yes? Yes.
[ Laughs ] Yes? Yes. Um...
So that was funny because it was my
birthday... Oh, wait, when's your
was my birthday... Oh,
wait, when's your birthday?
Oh, wait, when's your birthday?
April 12th.
Birthday? April 12th.
Oh, mine is the 18th.
April 12th. Oh, mine is the 18th.
Oh, both Aries!
Oh, mine is the 18th. Oh, both Aries!
[ Laughs ]
Oh, both Aries! [
Laughs ] Is that good?
[ Laughs ] Is that good?
Um, I'm sorry...
Is that good? Um, I'm
sorry... Your story. Continue.
Um, I'm sorry... Your story. Continue.
Okay, so, anyway, my.
Your story. Continue. Okay,
so, anyway, my brother says...
Okay, so, anyway, my brother
says... Okay, wait. Wait.
Brother says... Okay, wait.
Wait. You have a brother?
Okay, wait. Wait. You have a brother?
I have two...
You have a brother? I have
two... Terrence and James.
I have two... Terrence and James.
Oh, um, well, I'm the only
Terrence and James. Oh, um,
well, I'm the only child.
Oh, um, well, I'm the only child.
Oh.
Child. Oh.
I'm... I'm sorry.
Oh. I'm... I'm sorry.
Continue your story.
I'm... I'm sorry. Continue your story.
Okay, um, so then my brother.
Continue your story. Okay, um, so then
my brother Terrence he says, "You got to."
Okay, um, so then my brother Terrence
he says, "You got to get out more, Louie."
Terrence he says, "You got to get out more,
Louie." Wait. Who's... Who's Louie?
"Get out more, Louie." Wait. Who's...
Who's Louie? That's me. Regina Louise.
Wait. Who's... Who's Louie? That's
me. Regina Louise. [ Clears throat ]
That's me. Regina Louise.
[ Clears throat ] Okay.
[ Clears throat ] Okay.
Um, well, the food is here.
No, no, no, no, no. I... Is there
a problem? Lobster... I'm allergic.
Is there a problem? Lobster... I'm
allergic. Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know.
Lobster... I'm allergic. Oh, I'm sorry, I
didn't know. Shellfish, ever since I was.
Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know.
Shellfish, ever since I was 3.
Shellfish, ever since I was 3.
I almost died at a crawfish boil
3. I almost died at a crawfish
boil at my grandma's house in
I almost died at a crawfish boil at
my grandma's house in New Orleans.
At my grandma's house in New Orleans.
All right, well, get it out.
New Orleans. All right, well,
get it out of here, please!
All right, well, get it out
of here, please! Thank you!
Of here, please! Thank you!
Look, I'm... I'm sorry. Um...
Thank you! Look, I'm... I'm sorry. Um...
We have the rest of our lives to.
Look, I'm... I'm sorry. Um... We have the
rest of our lives to learn each other.
We have the rest of our lives to learn
each other. You know what, excuse me.
Learn each other. You know
what, excuse me. I got to go.
You know what, excuse me. I got to go.
Wait, no, but... Please.
I got to go. Wait, no, but... Please.
No, my allergies are.
Wait, no, but... Please. No, my allergies
are starting, and I got to get my.
No, my allergies are starting,
and I got to get my medicine.
Starting, and I got to get my medicine.
Well, let me walk you to...
Medicine. Well, let me walk
you to... No, Ulysses, I...
Well, let me walk you to...
No, Ulysses, I... I'm good.
No, Ulysses, I... I'm good.
I, uh, thank you for everything.
[ Sighs ]
Oh, Frankie...
So good to see you here.
Oh, Frankie... So good to
see you here. Like old times.
So good to see you here. Like old times.
[ Gasps ] Sweet Jesus!
Like old times. [ Gasps ] Sweet Jesus!
What are you doing?
[ Gasps ] Sweet Jesus! What
are you doing? Is this...
What are you doing? Is this
Is this a cellphone tower?
Is this... Is this a cellphone tower?
'Cause I wasn't really getting.
Is this a cellphone tower? 'Cause I wasn't
really getting reception up in the apartment,
'Cause I wasn't really getting reception up in
the apartment, so I came... down to see if...
Reception up in the apartment, so I came... down
to see if... Yeah, because it looks like
so I came... down to see if... Yeah, because
it looks like you're spying on your ex-husband.
Yeah, because it looks like you're spying on
your ex-husband while you're supposed to be
you're spying on your ex-husband while you're
supposed to be having din... [ Gasps ]
While you're supposed to be having din...
[ Gasps ] Whoa. Your future husband?
Having din... [ Gasps ] Whoa. Your
future husband? Good eye.
Whoa. Your future husband? Good eye.
That about sums it up.
Good eye. That about sums it up.
Oh, my God.
That about sums it up. Oh, my God.
That's a really nice ring.
Oh, my God. That's a really nice ring.
Thanks.
That's a really nice ring. Thanks.
Okay, I'm so confused, G.
Thanks. Okay, I'm
so confused, G. Stop.
Okay, I'm so confused, G. Stop.
I thought this wasn't supposed.
Stop. I thought this wasn't
supposed to be serious with...
I thought this wasn't supposed to
be serious with... Oh, shut up.
To be serious with... Oh, shut up.
Nice dress, by the way.
Oh, shut up. Nice dress, by the way.
It's yours.
Nice dress, by the way. It's yours.
No, I know it's mine, but I'm.
It's yours. No, I know it's
mine, but I'm gonna let that slide.
No, I know it's mine, but I'm gonna let
that slide. It's not every day your best
gonna let that slide. It's not every day
your best friend gets engaged to a.
It's not every day your best friend gets
engaged to a millionaire while she's spying
friend gets engaged to a millionaire
while she's spying on her ex-husband.
Millionaire while she's spying on
her ex-husband. Shh! Shh! Shh!
On her ex-husband. Shh!
Shh! Shh! Shush!
Shh! Shh! Shh! Shush!
I'll have you know he is my.
Shush! I'll have you know he is
my husband for 24 more hours.
I'll have you know he is my husband for 24
more hours. Okay, what about Ulysses,
husband for 24 more hours.
Okay, what about Ulysses, hmm?
Okay, what about Ulysses, hmm?
Your big-ticket item?
Hmm? Your big-ticket item?
His money is the least.
Your big-ticket item? His money is
the least interesting thing about him.
His money is the least interesting
thing about him. You're kinda right.
Interesting thing about him. You're kinda
right. You know what, it's something.
You're kinda right. You know what, it's
something there... I don't know, it's.
You know what, it's something there
I don't know, it's weird.
There... I don't know, it's weird.
It's like a sexy weird.
Weird. It's like a sexy weird.
Am I doing the right thing,
It's like a sexy weird. Am I
doing the right thing, Trish?
Am I doing the right thing, Trish?
Well, he's got his tongue
Trish? Well, he's got his
tongue down someone's throat.
Well, he's got his tongue down
someone's throat. [ Gasps ]
Down someone's throat. [ Gasps
] And your papers are already.
[ Gasps ] And your papers are
already signed and filed, G, so...
And your papers are already signed and filed,
G, so... You know, I don't really think
signed and filed, G, so... You know, I don't
really think there's turning back now.
You know, I don't really think there's turning
back now. I've never met anyone like
there's turning back now. I've
never met anyone like Ulysses.
I've never met anyone like Ulysses.
Yeah, well, definitely got.
Ulysses. Yeah, well, definitely
got that ring special-ordered.
Yeah, well, definitely got that
ring special-ordered. Let me see.
That ring special-ordered. Let me see.
Damn, that's some bling.
Let me see. Damn, that's some bling.
I'm just so messed up, I.
Damn, that's some bling. I'm just so
messed up, I don't feel like I deserve.
I'm just so messed up, I don't
feel like I deserve anything.
Don't feel like I deserve anything.
Stop it, okay?
Anything. Stop it, okay?
You deserve to be happy.
Stop it, okay? You deserve to be happy.
Franklin's with Alex, and I.
You deserve to be happy. Franklin's with
Alex, and I just left Ulysses flapping in.
Franklin's with Alex, and I just left Ulysses
flapping in the wind at dinner 'cause I'm a
just left Ulysses flapping in the wind
at dinner 'cause I'm a stupid-head.
The wind at dinner 'cause I'm a
stupid-head. Stop. Enough, enough.
Stupid-head. Stop. Enough, enough.
G, do you have any idea how long.
Stop. Enough, enough. G, do you have any idea
how long I have waited for some guy... or.
G, do you have any idea how long I have waited for
some guy... or girl... to get down on one knee
I have waited for some guy... or girl... to get
down on one knee and profess their love for me?
Girl... to get down on one knee and
profess their love for me? Do you?
And profess their love for me? Do you?
Because in the time I've known.
Do you? Because in the time
I've known you, you've had two.
Because in the time I've known you, you've
had two. Actually, it's three 'cause
you, you've had two. Actually,
it's three 'cause there was Chris...
Actually, it's three 'cause there was
Chris... Bitch! That is my point!
There was Chris... Bitch! That is my
point! Look at you. You are so lucky!
Look, it doesn't matter what you decide to
do, okay? Just do what makes you happy.
I love you. I love you, too.
Can we go drink now? That's my girl.
What you thinking? Cosmos?
That's my girl. What you thinking?
Cosmos? Mnh-mnh. Shots.
What you thinking? Cosmos? Mnh-mnh.
Shots. Hey! Let's go.
Just tell me that there's
a chance that one day you and I
Just tell me that there's a chance
that one day you and I will be together.
Chance that one day you and I will be
together. I'll wait as long as you need me
will be together. I'll wait
as long as you need me to.
I'll wait as long as you need me to.
Okay, we got to go, all
to. Okay, we got
to go, all right?
Okay, we got to go, all right?
We're already late.
Right? We're already late.
Come on!
We're already late. Come on!
[ Sighs ]
Come on! [ Sighs ]
Alex, I'm always gonna love.
[ Sighs ] Alex, I'm always gonna
love Regina... even if things don't
Alex, I'm always gonna love Regina... even if
things don't work out between us, but, look,
Regina... even if things don't work out between
us, but, look, I think maybe that's why I
work out between us, but, look, I think maybe
that's why I honestly... I can't see you and
I think maybe that's why I honestly
I can't see you and I happening.
Honestly... I can't see you and I
happening. Now, I know that's not the
I happening. Now, I know that's not
the answer that you want to hear,
Now, I know that's not the answer that you
want to hear, but, Alex, that's the truth.
Answer that you want to hear, but,
Alex, that's the truth. Okay.
But, Alex, that's the truth. Okay.
I guess that's the answer that I.
Okay. I guess that's the
answer that I needed to hear.
I guess that's the answer that I needed
to hear. I'll see you at rehearsal.
Needed to hear. I'll see you at rehearsal.
I don't want to keep the band
I'll see you at rehearsal. I don't
want to keep the band waiting.
Trish! [ Groans ] You're still down
at the bar, but could you open the.
[ Groans ] You're still down at the bar,
but could you open the door, please?
[ Sighs ] Hey, Ms. Young. You okay?
[ Sighs ] Sweet Jesus,
Hey, Ms. Young. You okay? [ Sighs
] Sweet Jesus, Thomas, I'm road kill.
[ Sighs ] Sweet Jesus, Thomas, I'm
road kill. Just wheel right over me.
Thomas, I'm road kill. Just wheel right
over me. Wow. That's some real bling.
Just wheel right over me. Wow. That's some
real bling. Whoever gave you that really.
Wow. That's some real bling. Whoever
gave you that really loves you.
Whoever gave you that really loves you.
He does.
Loves you. He does. He
loves me, and I should love.
He does. He loves me, and I
should love him, too, right?
He loves me, and I should love him,
too, right? Are you gonna marry him?
Him, too, right? Are you
gonna marry him? Mm, well...
Are you gonna marry him? Mm, well...
He is sweet and kind.
Mm, well... He is sweet and kind.
He's funny in his own way.
He is sweet and kind. He's funny in
his own way. He'd be a good husband.
He's funny in his own way. He'd be a
good husband. Faithful and caring...
He'd be a good husband.
Faithful and caring... And?
Faithful and caring... And?
What is this, a pop quiz?
And? What is this, a pop quiz?
I don't know...
What is this, a pop quiz? I don't
know... I don't want to be alone.
I don't know... I don't want to be alone.
So you don't love him, and
I don't want to be alone. So you don't
love him, and you're gonna still marry him?
So you don't love him, and you're gonna still
marry him? You're still gonna end up alone,
you're gonna still marry him? You're still
gonna end up alone, if you get what I mean.
You're still gonna end up alone, if you get
what I mean. [ Sighs ] Listen, me and my
if you get what I mean. [ Sighs ] Listen,
me and my sister, we never really had.
[ Sighs ] Listen, me and my sister,
we never really had money.
Sister, we never really had money.
All we had was love.
Money. All we had was love. When
you're poor, love is pretty.
All we had was love. When you're poor,
love is pretty much all you can afford.
When you're poor, love is pretty much all
you can afford. Love is what truly matters.
Much all you can afford. Love is what truly
matters. Oh, and food! Food and love.
Love is what truly matters. Oh, and food!
Food and love. That's what really matters.
Oh, and food! Food and love. That's
what really matters. [ Sighs ]
That's what really matters.
[ Sighs ] How old are you?
[ Sighs ] How old are you?
Just turned 20.
How old are you? Just turned 20.
Well, you're wise for your.
Just turned 20. Well,
you're wise for your age.
Well, you're wise for your age.
Yeah. I was raised right.
Age. Yeah. I was raised right.
My mom, God bless her soul,
Yeah. I was raised right. My mom, God bless
her soul, she used to always tell me to.
My mom, God bless her soul, she used
to always tell me to listen to love.
She used to always tell me to listen
to love. If you believe in love, it's
listen to love. If you believe in love,
it's gonna... it's gonna guide you to.
If you believe in love, it's gonna... it's
gonna guide you to where you want to be.
Gonna... it's gonna guide you to where
you want to be. I'll never forget that.
Where you want to be. I'll never
forget that. That's great advice.
I'll never forget that. That's great
advice. She's a saint. Could you...
That's great advice. She's a saint.
Could you... Could you open this door?
She's a saint. Could you... Could
you open this door? Yes.
Could you open this door? Yes.
I need you to help me, too,
Yes. I need you to help
me, too, 'cause I can't...
I need you to help me, too,
'cause I can't... Okay.
'Cause I can't... Okay. Careful.
I'm delicate.
Okay. Careful. I'm delicate.
Okay. There we go.
Careful. I'm delicate. Okay.
There we go. All right.
Okay. There we go. All right.
[ Keys jingling, door unlocks ]
All right. [ Keys jingling,
door unlocks ] Thank you, Thomas.
[ Keys jingling, door unlocks ] Thank you,
Thomas. Merry Christmas, Ms. Young.
Thank you, Thomas. Merry Christmas, Ms.
Young. Merry Christmas, Thomas.
Okay, I am still hung,
and my lungs hate you.
Okay, I am still hung, and my lungs
hate you. Yeah, but, girl, your legs
and my lungs hate you. Yeah, but, girl,
your legs and your butt love me, so you.
Yeah, but, girl, your legs and your butt love
me, so you know what, your lungs are gonna
and your butt love me, so you know what, your
lungs are gonna have to catch up and jump
know what, your lungs are gonna
have to catch up and jump on board.
Have to catch up and jump on board.
Oh, Leslie!
On board. Oh, Leslie! Hey!
Oh, Leslie! Hey! Oh, the
woman that almost killed.
Hey! Oh, the woman
that almost killed me.
Oh, the woman that almost killed me.
I just want to say that that
me. I just want to say that
that tree is so beautiful.
I just want to say that that tree
is so beautiful. And that star...
tree is so beautiful. And that star...
It's the Chesterton.
And that star... It's
the Chesterton tradition.
It's the Chesterton tradition.
You know, we place the star, and
tradition. You know, we place the
star, and then we light it up on.
You know, we place the star, and then
we light it up on Christmas Eve.
Then we light it up on Christmas Eve.
You guys should come.
Christmas Eve. You guys should come.
Hope to see you.
You guys should come. Hope to see you.
[ Panting ] Those kids are.
Hope to see you. [ Panting
] Those kids are crazy, man!
[ Panting ] Those kids are crazy, man!
[ Laughs ]
Crazy, man! [ Laughs ] Ho, ho, ho!
Merry Christmas!
[ Laughs ] Ho, ho, ho!
Merry Christmas! Happy Kwanzaa.
Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas! Happy
Kwanzaa. It's Ramadan, too, right?
Happy Kwanzaa. It's Ramadan, too, right?
[ Laughing ] No way.
It's Ramadan, too, right? [
Laughing ] No way. Ho, ho, ho!
[ Laughing ] No way. Ho, ho, ho!
It's too much.
Ho, ho, ho! It's too much.
See, the real Santa Claus, he.
It's too much. See, the real Santa
Claus, he got the flu, so I had to come in.
See, the real Santa Claus, he got the flu,
so I had to come in at the last minute.
Got the flu, so I had to come in at the last
minute. Yeah, well, hey, you're young
at the last minute. Yeah, well,
hey, you're young and black, skinny...
Yeah, well, hey, you're young and
black, skinny... Says Santa to me.
And black, skinny... Says Santa to me.
[ Laughter ]
Says Santa to me. [ Laughter ]
So, are you guys coming to.
[ Laughter ] So, are you guys
coming to the party tonight?
So, are you guys coming to the
party tonight? Some free food!
The party tonight? Some free food!
Are you going?
Some free food! Are you going?
Am I going?
Are you going? Am I going?
Do you know who I am?
Am I going? Do you know who I am?
I am the HMFIC up in this!
Do you know who I am? I am the
HMFIC up in this! [ Laughs ]
I am the HMFIC up in this! [
Laughs ] What is this?
[ Laughs ] What is this?
Thomas...
What is this? Thomas...
Mr. James. [ Chuckles ]
Thomas... Mr. James. [
Chuckles ] How you doing, sir?
Mr. James. [ Chuckles ] How
you doing, sir? How goes it?
How you doing, sir? How goes it?
It goes great.
How goes it? It goes great.
The outfits fits amazing, and I.
It goes great. The outfits fits amazing,
and I feel like I have superpowers.
The outfits fits amazing, and I feel
like I have superpowers. [ Chuckles ]
Feel like I have superpowers. [ Chuckles
] Uh, I got to go deliver some.
[ Chuckles ] Uh, I got to go deliver
some presents, and I got a boss to.
Uh, I got to go deliver some
presents, and I got a boss to impress.
Presents, and I got a boss to impress.
[ Chuckles ]
Impress. [ Chuckles
] Thomas...
[ Chuckles ] Thomas... Mm.
Thomas... Mm.
You're doing a really good.
Mm. You're doing
a really good job.
You're doing a really good job.
Keep up the good work.
Job. Keep up the good work. Now,
you're off at 7:00 tonight,
Keep up the good work. Now, you're
off at 7:00 tonight, right?
Now, you're off at 7:00 tonight, right?
Yes, sir, but if you need me
right? Yes, sir, but if you
need me for OT, I'll be here OT.
Yes, sir, but if you need me for OT, I'll
be here OT. No, I want you to go to the
for OT, I'll be here OT. No, I want
you to go to the Christmas party.
No, I want you to go to the
Christmas party. Tonight?
Christmas party. Tonight? Ms.
McDonald has purchased.
Tonight? Ms. McDonald
has purchased your ticket.
Ms. McDonald has purchased your ticket.
Ms. McDonald, you got a
your ticket. Ms. McDonald,
you got a ticket for me?
Ms. McDonald, you got a
ticket for me? Yeah.
Ticket for me? Yeah.
Oh, come here, big fella!
Yeah. Oh, come here, big fella!
Thank you, Mr. James! [ Laughs ]
Oh, come here, big fella! Thank you, Mr.
James! [ Laughs ] Thomas.
Thank you, Mr. James! [ Laughs ] Thomas.
Have a good time.
Thomas. Have a good time.
Yes, sir.
Have a good time. Yes, sir.
HMFIC, huh?
Yes, sir. HMFIC, huh?
Only sometimes.
HMFIC, huh? Only sometimes.
Merry Christmas, sweetie.
All right, so, still going to
the party tonight? Yeah.
The party tonight? Yeah.
Ho, ho, ho!
Yeah. Ho, ho, ho! You
know Franklin's gonna be.
Ho, ho, ho! You know
Franklin's gonna be there.
You know Franklin's gonna be there.
I know, but I'm not gonna let
there. I know, but I'm not gonna
let that stop me from enjoying the.
I know, but I'm not gonna let that
stop me from enjoying the festivities.
That stop me from enjoying the festivities.
All right! That's the spirit.
Festivities. All right! That's the
spirit. You can show off Ulysses and.
All right! That's the spirit. You can
show off Ulysses and that big old boulder.
You can show off Ulysses and that
big old boulder. Let Franklin know,
that big old boulder. Let Franklin
know, "Baby, I have moved on."
Let Franklin know, "Baby, I
have moved on." [ Giggles ]
"Baby, I have moved on." [
Giggles ] Yeah. I'll do that.
What's up, guys?
[ Chuckles ] Thomas.
What's up, guys? [
Chuckles ] Thomas. Very nice.
[ Chuckles ] Thomas. Very nice.
[ Sighs ] Thank you,
Very nice. [ Sighs ] Thank you, Ms.
McDonald.
[ Sighs ] Thank you, Ms. McDonald.
Oh, no, sweetheart, in that.
Ms. McDonald. Oh, no, sweetheart,
in that suit, you can call me Trish.
Oh, no, sweetheart, in that suit,
you can call me Trish. Mm.
Suit, you can call me Trish. Mm.
You know what, I think I'm.
Mm. You know what, I think
I'm gonna let you give me a dance.
You know what, I think I'm gonna
let you give me a dance. May I?
Gonna let you give me a dance.
May I? Yes, you may.
May I? Yes, you may. Teach
this young buck something.
Yes, you may. Teach this
young buck something. Okay.
Teach this young buck something. Okay.
Look, I just want to apologize.
Okay. Look, I just want to
apologize again for last night.
Look, I just want to apologize again
for last night. Forget it.
Again for last night. Forget it.
It's Christmas Eve.
Forget it. It's Christmas Eve.
So let's dance.
It's Christmas Eve. So let's dance.
[ Chuckles ]
Ladies and gentlemen, the
Chesterton and Apex Records is
Ladies and gentlemen, the Chesterton and Apex
Records is proud to present Alex Palomino.
Chesterton and Apex Records is proud to present
Alex Palomino. [ Cheers and applause ]
You set my heart free
I want you under my tree
You set my heart free I want you under
my tree You really do look amazing.
I want you under my tree You
really do look amazing. So do you.
You really do look amazing. So
do you. Please, please, please
So do you. Please,
please, please stay
Please, please, please
stay You're with her now?
Stay You're with her now?
[ Laughs ] It's complicated.
You're with her now? [ Laughs ]
It's complicated. Doesn't look it.
[ Laughs ] It's complicated.
Doesn't look it. Look at your hand.
Doesn't look it. Look at your hand.
Yeah, I don't know, maybe it's.
Look at your hand. Yeah, I don't know,
maybe it's time for me to move on.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Hi, Frankie. Alex, that
was fantastic. Thank you.
Alex, that was fantastic.
Thank you. Congrats.
Thank you. Congrats.
You should sing tonight.
Congrats. You should sing tonight.
No, that's all behind me.
You should sing tonight. No, that's
all behind me. Like so many other things.
No, that's all behind me. Like
so many other things. I have to go.
Like so many other things. I have to go.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I have to go. Ladies and gentlemen,
we have a very special guest.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a very
special guest in the house tonight,
we have a very special guest in the house
tonight, Ms. Regina Cartwright Young.
In the house tonight, Ms. Regina Cartwright
Young. You'll know her as Gina Gina.
Ms. Regina Cartwright Young. You'll know her
as Gina Gina. I wonder if she'll come sing us.
You'll know her as Gina Gina. I wonder
if she'll come sing us a song tonight.
I wonder if she'll come sing us
a song tonight. Come on, Gina!
A song tonight. Come on, Gina!
Are you okay?
Come on, Gina! Are you okay?
It's Christmas Eve.
Are you okay? It's Christmas Eve.
Surely you won't deny us at.
It's Christmas Eve. Surely you won't
deny us at least one holiday song.
Surely you won't deny us at least one
holiday song. What do you say, Gina?
Least one holiday song. What do you
say, Gina? Come on up! We won't bite.
What do you say, Gina? Come on up! We won't
bite. [ Chanting ] G! G! G! G! G! G!
Come on up! We won't bite. [ Chanting ] G!
G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G!
[ Chanting ] G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G!
G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G!
G! G! G! G! G! G! G! G!
G! G! G! G! You okay?
G! G! G! G! G! G! You okay?
[ Chanting continues ]
You okay? [ Chanting continues
] [ Cheers and applause ]
Merry Christmas, everyone. Guess
I shouldn't even be saying that.
Guess I shouldn't even be saying that.
Christmas used to be my favorite
that. Christmas used to be my
favorite time of the year, but...
Christmas used to be my favorite time
of the year, but... Now, not so much.
Time of the year, but... Now, not so much.
So here's a song I love.
Now, not so much. So here's a song
I love for someone I used to love.
So here's a song I love for
someone I used to love.
For someone I used to love.
Christmas is here
Christmas is here
And all the carolers sing
Christmas is here And all the carolers
sing Snow falls, but I can't feel
And all the carolers sing Snow falls, but
I can't feel the spirit Christmas brings
Snow falls, but I can't feel the spirit
Christmas brings Without love
The spirit Christmas brings Without
love The tinsel's lost its bling
Without love The tinsel's
lost its bling Without love
The tinsel's lost its bling Without
love My heart just cannot sing
Without love My heart just cannot
sing Not feeling very merry
My heart just cannot sing Not feeling
very merry Don't want the yuletide gay
Not feeling very merry Don't want the
yuletide gay No trees, no lights, no songs
Don't want the yuletide gay No
trees, no lights, no songs to sing
No trees, no lights, no songs
to sing Since you went away
To sing Since you went away
You said you'd miss me this
Since you went away You said
you'd miss me this Christmas
You said you'd miss me this Christmas
You said you'd miss me
Christmas You said you'd miss me
You're not here, and it's just
You said you'd miss me You're not here,
and it's just any other ordinary day
You're not here, and it's just any other
ordinary day Santa take away these blues
Any other ordinary day Santa take
away these blues Wrap 'em up,
Santa take away these blues Wrap
'em up, and tie them with a bow
Wrap 'em up, and tie them with a
bow And give them to the man who
and tie them with a bow And give them
to the man who broke my heart just so
And give them to the man who broke
my heart just so Without love
Broke my heart just so Without
love There's no one left to hold
Without love There's no one
left to hold Without love
There's no one left to hold Without
love This Christmas leaves me
Without love This
Christmas leaves me cold
This Christmas leaves me cold
Not feeling very merry
Cold Not feeling very merry
Don't want the yuletide gay
Not feeling very merry Don't want the
yuletide gay No trees, no lights, no songs
Don't want the yuletide gay No
trees, no lights, no songs to sing
No trees, no lights, no songs
to sing Since you went away
To sing Since you went away
You said you'd miss me this
Since you went away You said
you'd miss me this Christmas
You said you'd miss me this Christmas
You said you'd miss me
Christmas You said you'd
miss me You did
You said you'd miss me You did
You're not here, and it's just
You did You're not here, and
it's just any other ordinary day
You're not here, and it's just any other
ordinary day You're not here, and it's just
any other ordinary day You're not
here, and it's just any other ordinary
You're not here, and it's just
any other ordinary Day
Any other ordinary Day
[ Cheers and applause ]
Excuse me. Vodka Seven and Vodka.
Now that's a holiday drink.
Vodka Seven and Vodka. Now that's a holiday
drink. What are we celebrating or not.
Now that's a holiday drink. What are
we celebrating or not celebrating?
What are we celebrating or not celebrating?
Love sucks.
Celebrating? Love sucks.
Hear, hear.
Love sucks. Hear, hear.
Thank you.
Hear, hear. Thank you.
If it wasn't for the.
Thank you. If it wasn't for
the top-shelf Christmas at the.
If it wasn't for the top-shelf Christmas
at the Chesterton, I would have zero
top-shelf Christmas at the Chesterton, I
would have zero Christmas spirit in my life.
Chesterton, I would have zero Christmas
spirit in my life. That's good to hear.
Christmas spirit in my life. That's
good to hear. And if my love life was as.
That's good to hear. And if my love
life was as wondrous as my decor...
And if my love life was as wondrous as
my decor... [ Scoffs ] Honey, you
wondrous as my decor... [ Scoffs ]
Honey, you couldn't possibly have me beat.
[ Scoffs ] Honey, you couldn't
possibly have me beat. Try me.
Couldn't possibly have me beat. Try me.
I just got engaged to a.
Try me. I just got
engaged to a millionaire...
I just got engaged to a millionaire...
to make the man I really love...
millionaire... to make the man
I really love... jealous.
To make the man I really love...
jealous. Okay.
Jealous. Okay. I fell
for a guy that's totally.
Okay. I fell for a guy that's
totally wrong for me, that's totally
I fell for a guy that's totally wrong for me,
that's totally engaged, and who can totally get
wrong for me, that's totally engaged,
and who can totally get me fired.
Engaged, and who can totally get me fired.
Call it a tie.
Me fired. Call it a tie.
Yeah.
Call it a tie. Yeah.
[ Sighs ] I got to fix this.
Yeah. [ Sighs ] I got to
fix this before it gets worse.
[ Sighs ] I got to fix this before
it gets worse. I have faith in you.
Before it gets worse. I have
faith in you. You don't know me.
I have faith in you. You don't
know me. [ Sighs ] I know you have.
You don't know me. [ Sighs ] I know
you have great taste in Christmas decor.
[ Sighs ] I know you have great
taste in Christmas decor. I do.
Great taste in Christmas decor. I do.
Well, with that being said,
I do. Well, with that being said,
I need to head out to the lobby.
Well, with that being said, I need to head out
to the lobby to make sure the star gets lit
I need to head out to the lobby to make sure
the star gets lit at the top of the tree.
To make sure the star gets lit at the top
of the tree. Because, remember, it's the
at the top of the tree. Because, remember,
it's the Chesterton Christmas tradition.
Because, remember, it's the Chesterton
Christmas tradition. I have faith in you.
Chesterton Christmas tradition. I
have faith in you. That's my line.
I have faith in you. That's my line.
It's a good line.
That's my line. It's a good line.
[ Chuckles ]
It's a good line. [
Chuckles ] Merry Christmas.
[ Chuckles ] Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas.
Excuse me. Is this seat taken?
[ Chuckles ] Um...
Is this seat taken? [ Chuckles ] Um...
I know it's the best seat in the.
[ Chuckles ] Um... I know it's the best
seat in the house because it's next to you.
I know it's the best seat in the house because
it's next to you. You are too much.
House because it's next to you.
You are too much. [ Chuckles ]
You are too much. [ Chuckles
] Well, I heard your song.
[ Chuckles ] Well, I heard your song.
Yeah, well, you should have.
Well, I heard your song. Yeah, well, you
should have stopped me before I embarrassed.
Yeah, well, you should have stopped me before
I embarrassed myself in front of everybody.
Stopped me before I embarrassed myself in front
of everybody. It was sad, devastating...
myself in front of everybody. It was
sad, devastating... but you crushed it.
It was sad, devastating... but you
crushed it. Do you ever say anything
but you crushed it. Do you ever
say anything negative or critical?
Do you ever say anything
negative or critical? Rarely.
Negative or critical? Rarely.
I don't see any need for.
Rarely. I don't see
any need for negativity.
I don't see any need for negativity.
Ulysses, these last few weeks
negativity. Ulysses, these last few
weeks have been very hard for me.
Ulysses, these last few weeks have been very
hard for me emotionally, and you've been
have been very hard for me emotionally, and
you've been there night and day, holding my
emotionally, and you've been there night and
day, holding my hand, reassuring me that
there night and day, holding my hand,
reassuring me that everything is gonna be okay.
Hand, reassuring me that everything is
gonna be okay. Because it will be.
Everything is gonna be okay. Because
it will be. Even if I can't marry you?
Because it will be. Even if
I can't marry you? [ Laughs ]
Even if I can't marry you?
[ Laughs ] [ Sighs ]
[ Laughs ] [ Sighs ]
Well, that would, um...
[ Sighs ] Well, that would, um...
That would be disappointing.
Well, that would, um... That would be
disappointing. Ulysses, you are one of the.
That would be disappointing. Ulysses, you
are one of the kindest men I have ever met,
Ulysses, you are one of the kindest men I
have ever met, and I've never had someone woo
kindest men I have ever met, and I've never
had someone woo me the way you have.
And I've never had someone woo me the
way you have. But I can't marry you.
Me the way you have. But I can't marry you.
You're still in love with.
But I can't marry you. You're
still in love with Franklin.
You're still in love with Franklin.
We just have too much history
Franklin. We just have too much
history between us for me to even think.
We just have too much history between us for
me to even think about marrying someone else.
It was impulsive, thoughtless...
No. Let me own it.
No. Let me own it.
Look, Regina, if you didn't.
Let me own it. Look, Regina, if you
didn't care, we would have went left a.
Look, Regina, if you didn't care, we
would have went left a long time ago.
Care, we would have went left a long
time ago. I was really frustrated and
long time ago. I was really frustrated
and angry with Franklin, but mostly.
I was really frustrated and angry with Franklin,
but mostly I was angry with me, and I am so
angry with Franklin, but mostly I was
angry with me, and I am so sorry.
I was angry with me, and I am so sorry.
Ulysses, you deserve to be with
sorry. Ulysses, you deserve to be
with someone who loves you for you,
Ulysses, you deserve to be with someone who loves
you for you, not because they're trying to
someone who loves you for you, not because
they're trying to run from loving someone else.
Not because they're trying to run
from loving someone else. True.
[ Sighs ] Goodbye, Ulysses.
And thank you for showing me.
Goodbye, Ulysses. And thank you for
showing me love and sharing happiness when.
And thank you for showing me love and sharing
happiness when I needed it the most.
Now that's where it belongs.
Franklin.
Now that's where it belongs.
Franklin. Dance with me, Regina.
Franklin. Dance with me, Regina.
Please, just one dance.
Dance with me, Regina. Please,
just one dance. It's Christmas Eve.
And how do I begin
to say You and me
And how do I begin to say
You and me It's all I need for
You and me It's all
I need for Christmas
It's all I need for
Christmas Lighting up
Christmas Lighting up
You know, there's something I
Lighting up You know, there's
something I need to get off my chest.
You know, there's something I need to
get off my chest. What about Alex?
Need to get off my chest.
What about Alex?
What about Alex?
[ Laughs ] I think she'll
[ Laughs ] I think
she'll bounce back.
[ Laughs ] I think she'll bounce back.
She's in good hands.
Bounce back. She's in good hands.
Remember when we had that big.
She's in good hands. Remember when we had
that big fight a while back, when I came.
Remember when we had that big fight a
while back, when I came home at dawn?
Fight a while back, when I came
home at dawn? I was dead-ass wrong.
Home at dawn? I was dead-ass wrong.
I should have called.
I was dead-ass wrong. I should have called.
You're my wife, and that was
I should have called. You're my
wife, and that was insensitive.
You're my wife, and that was insensitive.
It was crass and...
insensitive. It was crass and...
I guess what I'm trying to say.
It was crass and... I guess what I'm trying
to say is that, Regina, I am really,
I guess what I'm trying to say is that,
Regina, I am really, really sorry.
Is that, Regina, I am really, really sorry.
Franklin, it doesn't even
really sorry. Franklin, it doesn't
even matter at this point because.
Franklin, it doesn't even matter at this
point because we'll never be what we once
matter at this point because we'll
never be what we once were.
We'll never be what we once were.
We'll be divorced in, what, two
were. We'll be divorced
in, what, two hours?
We'll be divorced in, what, two hours?
Don't you get it?
Hours? Don't you get it?
Yeah, no, I get it.
Don't you get it? Yeah, no, I get it.
It's just...
Yeah, no, I get it. It's just...
Look, I don't want to be alone.
It's just... Look, I don't want
to be alone this Christmas.
Look, I don't want to be alone this
Christmas. I don't think you do, either.
Hey! May I have this dance?
Uh, you're kidding, right?
May I have this dance? Uh, you're kidding,
right? Okay, look, you can, but promise.
Uh, you're kidding, right? Okay, look, you can,
but promise me you're not gonna bug out on.
Okay, look, you can, but promise
me you're not gonna bug out on me.
Me you're not gonna bug out on me.
I can do that.
Me. I can do that. Okay.
I can do that. Okay.
Underneath the mistletoe
Okay. Underneath
the mistletoe Oh, oh!
Underneath the mistletoe Oh, oh!
Let me find out there's a little
Oh, oh! Let me find out there's a
little nasty underneath this nerd.
Let me find out there's a little nasty
underneath this nerd. [ Laughing ]
Nasty underneath this nerd. [
Laughing ] You know
[ Laughing ] You know
You know, I could drive you
You know You know, I could
drive you to your parents house.
You know, I could drive you to your parents
house. That way, you could be there on
to your parents house. That way, you
could be there on Christmas Day.
That way, you could be there on
Christmas Day. You would do that?
Christmas Day. You would do that?
I mean, I am still your.
You would do that? I
mean, I am still your husband.
I mean, I am still your husband.
For another 120 minutes.
Husband. For another 120 minutes.
I don't know, the snow.
For another 120 minutes. I don't
know, the snow outside's pretty bad.
I don't know, the snow outside's
pretty bad. Regina, I got chains on my
outside's pretty bad. Regina, I
got chains on my truck, remember?
Regina, I got chains on my truck,
remember? Has it really been that long?
Truck, remember? Has it really been
that long? It feels like almost a.
Has it really been that long?
It feels like almost a lifetime.
It feels like almost a lifetime.
As we held each other for
lifetime. As we held each other
for what seemed to be the last time,
As we held each other for what seemed to be the
last time, I closed my eyes, and wished for
what seemed to be the last time, I closed my eyes,
and wished for a Christmas like the ones we had
I closed my eyes, and wished for a Christmas
like the ones we had in the past.
A Christmas like the ones we had in the
past. We never made it to my parents'
in the past. We never made
it to my parents' house.
We never made it to my parents' house.
The snow was too heavy.
House. The snow was too heavy.
So we settled for the apartment.
The snow was too heavy. So we settled for
the apartment where we had begun our life.
So we settled for the apartment where
we had begun our life together.
Where we had begun our life together.
Who knew the snow wasn't the
together. Who knew the snow wasn't the
only Christmas surprise I was in.
Who knew the snow wasn't the only
Christmas surprise I was in for?
You decorated. Yeah. You
know I love Christmas, too.
Yeah. You know I love Christmas, too.
Hasn't been the same without you.
You know I love Christmas, too. Hasn't
been the same without you here, though.
Hasn't been the same without you here,
though. The tree is perfect.
Here, though. The tree is perfect.
I don't know about that.
The tree is perfect. I don't know about
that. It kind of reminds me of the one.
I don't know about that. It kind
of reminds me of the one that...
It kind of reminds me of the one that...
Our first Christmas here.
That... Our first Christmas here.
Yeah.
Our first Christmas here. Yeah.
Wasn't fancy, but, you know, we.
Yeah. Wasn't fancy, but,
you know, we made it work...
Wasn't fancy, but, you know,
we made it work... Together.
Made it work... Together.
No challenge, great or.
Together. No challenge,
great or small...
No challenge, great or small...
will stop us.
Small... ...will stop us.
We'll work through them all.
Will stop us. We'll work through
them all. And find our way...
We'll work through them all.
And find our way... Together.
[ Bell tolls ] It's official.
We are divorced.
I guess you won't be needing that
anymore. You mind if I return it to my
that anymore. You mind if
I return it to my mother?
You mind if I return it to my mother?
She's, uh...
mother? She's, uh... She's
been asking about it.
She's, uh... She's been asking about it.
It's a family heirloom.
She's been asking about it. It's
a family heirloom. Of course.
Do what you got to do.
Regina Young is no more.
Regina. I think I should go.
Please look at me.
I love you.
Regina Cartwright, only a fool
would let you go once.
Now, I promise you, I will never
make that same mistake twice.
Will you marry me?
Again?
[ Gasps ]
Baby, I got to hear you say
it.
Yes, I will marry you again.
We were technically divorced
for one minute.
Then we started all over again.
But that's another story for
another time on another
Christmas.