Monument (2018) Movie Script
He should buy a fucking carton of cigarettes
if he needs to smoke the whole way.
Good evening!
What a dark hole!
What's your name?
Mariusz.
Lend me 2 zlotys.
It's impossible to win.
But I am always lucky.
Really? I wish I were too.
- Dinosaur?
- Yeah.
Where are you from?
From Pabianice.
Oh fucking shit!
Fuck!
Give me 2 more!
OK, guys! The smoking break is over.
Please, get back on the bus.
Our journey continues.
Let me just finish the cigarette, please.
- I'll drink it up and we can go.
- 2 more minutes, OK?
- Excuse me!
- Quiet, please!
I'd like to make a toast.
'Cos we don't know each other
and I'd like to change that.
Here's to our internship!
...erm... I wish y'all good luck!
...erm... and good luck!
...and... erm...
Oh, no! He popped another one!
- To our cooperation!
- Here's to life enjoyment!
- Shut up!
- Fine!
OK
This is gonna be the first recording.
Once I had a fever...
... I had a fever...
...a fever.
I had once...
I had once a fever.
And I had...
I had once a...
Shit!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
We're here, I guess...
It's cold.
Has anyone seen the driver?
The driver, anyone?
No... come on...
must be smoking somewhere.
So, you see...
If you smoke the whole way, you shit later on.
You think we can open it?
I think we can't.
Beautiful!
I heard they had a swimming pool.
What did he say?
Is there a swimming pool?
So, 2 hours of sleep and...
Stand in a line!
Done?
Number off, please!
- One.
- Two.
- Three.
- Halt!
From the left, please!
- One.
- Two.
- Three.
- Halt!
Hands out of your pockets!
Turn it off!
1, 2, 3, 4...
5, 6...
7, 8, 9...
Wipe it off!
- 10, 11...
- Take it out!
- 12...
- Start all over again!
1, 2, 3, 4, 5...
6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13...
14, 15, 16, 17...
18, 19.
Someone's missing.
- That guy is his friend.
- No, you are! Homo!
Excuse me.
I think one guy is missing...
... he was wearing a red hoodie.
Fuck, he wasn't on the bus this morning.
He must have run away.
But he was with us at night
so he must be somewhere.
Fine.
Your friend has just lost his chance
to get a credit and pass.
If you don't treat this internship seriously,
you won't pass it.
Customers stay in this hotel.
Customers not guests!
Because they pay for their stay here.
So, this is neither fun nor even studying.
Spit it out!
Spit it out!!!
You are not students of hospitality any more.
And no allowances will be made for you here.
Do you understand?
You're staring like halfwits.
Each of you will attempt every single job available here.
The reception, the laundry room...
the room service, the kitchen, the spa...
and so on and so forth.
But there are things you must do jointly.
As a group.
- For example maintenance work.
- What do you mean by that?
Will you shut your trap?
Or you want to keep swaggering
about how important you are.
I'm sorry.
So maintenance work for the whole group.
After working hours but as the daily workload.
For example clearing the area
around the old dumpsters...
cleaning the old bathrooms near the pedestal...
or cleaning the boiler room.
Additionally, you're going to wait on tables at events such as:
wedding, First Communion and funeral receptions.
The most important lesson for today -
you serve from the right and you clear from the left.
So now you'll be drawing your name tags.
- What do you mean by drawing, because...
- Oh, fuck off!
Excuse me, I don't want to swagger or anythng...
but all our name tags have 'Pawel' on them.
And we all have 'Ania' on ours.
Stand in a line!
Customers just don't care about your actual names.
Theyre utterly insignificant.
No-one's going to learn your actual names
whatever they may be.
They're simply not important!
And that's just my inner joke.
Pin them on!
On the right hand side!
I meant... right from my perspective.
'Let's not be afraid of having fun!'
'Gentlemen, invite ladies to dance!'
'That's beautiful.'
Sasha, the groom is...
going to say a few important words...
that he has prepared for us...
meanwhile, our skillful servers will bring glasses...
and champagne in a moment.
Let's give Sasha some applause!
Good!
This is for...
Thanks, mom!
This is for my friends...
I'm no longer a bachelor for you...
For you I'm dead.
Brother!
Goodbye, my friend, goodbye
My love, you are in my heart.
It was preordained we should part
And be reunited by and by.
no handshake to endure.
Let's have no sadness - furrowed brow.
There's nothing new in dying now
Though living is no newer.
'Bravo!'
Thank you very much!'
'How to pull a crocodile out of water?
I have no idea, it shouldn't bother us.'
And now the wedding cakes!
Come on!
Here comes the table!
Can the Happy Couple come up here, please?
And here is our first wedding cake!
Just one of many.
'Bravo!'
'Everybody to the dance floor!'
'Let's enjoy the night!'
- Those two boxes as well.
- OK.
Ewww!
Oh, shit!
- No!
- Just one!
OK, lock the door!
Give me a bag!
- Slowly!
- Why?
Let me show you a trick.
You pulverize the flint...
- Flint?
- Yes.
Take this!
You take it out...
You lick the cigarette...
You coat it in this...
Magic for the poor.
My old man taught me that.
When I was born he didn't give a shit about me.
- Neither did mine!
- Nor mine.
When he saw me smoking he went mad...
and he...
he brought a pack of cigarettes...
- Look at her!
- How can you smoke like that?
I just can.
Look what the customer's got here!
Do you think it's his better half?
An auntie.
Her boobs are hideous!
Give it to me!
Take a deep drag into your lungs
or else you waste the cigarette.
As if...
"Fuck, mom is coming!"
As if you were scared.
So, when my old man caught me smoking
he went so mad...
he brought a bucket...
he put down a pack of cigarettes...
a bottle of water...
and he made me smoke one cigarette after another...
and wash them down with water
just to make me throw up...
Typical!
And I finally threw up...
And then he kept bragging to his friends
how hardy I was...
My granddad died and left a cigarette
in his liquor cabinet.
And I took it and my grandma caught me...
And... Since then,
I think I've been cursed...
I keep on smoking.
- I dreamed about being depressed...
- Move!
Hi. Is there anything else?
I'll be in the basement.
What's the difference between
butter and a hooker?
Greasiness?
Not really.
Butter is difficult to spread.
That's a good one.
That's funny.
- At the jungle...
- In the jungle.
- What?
- IN the jungle! Not AT the jungle.
OK, IN the jungle, a store has opened up...
It's two p.m. and there's been
a line outside since 6 a.m.
And suddenly a hare is elbowing through the crowd:
"Excuse me!"
"Excuse me!"
He gets to the front
but a tiger and a hippo are first in line
"No line jumping!"
"We've been waiting here since morning.
To the end of the line with you!"
So, the hare was back at the end of the line.
So, the hare goes again:
"Excuse me!"
"Excuse me!"
And again, they shout:
"Go to the end of the line!"
So, the hare sat down in the bush,
he sobbed and sighed:
"Fuck, how am I supposed to open
my store today?"
What? Sorry,
I didn't hear the punch line.
Nothing!
- He couldn't open the store.
- Oh.
I know another one about 2 deaf owls.
One says: "Kiss my ass!"
And the other says: "Kiss my ass!"
Two deaf people are talking:
"- Are you going fishing?"
"- No, I'm going fishing."
"Oh, what a pity!
I thought you'd go fishing with me."
Is that all?
- Luckily, it is.
- It was the same joke!
'Massage received from:
763735750'
'Hi, dude! Visit Kaska's profile
and check out comments below her photo.'
'You're gonna laugh your ass off.
Take care. Bye!'
It looks like cum.
One more time.
What?
Shall I slow it down?
Let's swap places.
What?
Shall we swap places?
Oh shit!
Do you need a fucking invitation or what?
Shall I send it to you with a red ribbon?
No, I just...
I'm wondering why we got
the worst job possible.
Well, I don't know...
Stop bitching!
If you hadn't listened to music
and waited some tables instead,
You wouldn't have to come here...
'PAWEL'.
Imagine it's your grandma's tomb.
- You're spilling water.
- I wonder what HER name is?
- Whose?
- HERS.
Barb Dwyer...
- Which one's the first name?
- Barb.
I think her name is something like, you know...
Hedwig.
Hedwig?
Hattie.
Hedwig and the angry inch.
Get down to work,
'cause she can see us through the window.
- Which one?
- That one.
She touches herself while looking at me.
She unbuttons her shirt.
Her hand goes down...
And there's nothing.
Just like the Barbie Doll.
OK, get down to work, will you?
1, 2, 3, the witch is watching thee,
through the window.
- Which one?
- That one!
Give me 2 zlotys, will you?
Firstly, garbage.
Garbage must be disposed of at the dumpsters.
And not at the door!
Secondly, the pedestal is still dirty...
2 people are needed in the kitchen
to do the dishes
and to wait on tables,
thatll be you and... you!
The other positions remain unchanged.
But we were supposed to change...
But you are good at
what you're doing now.
Here we go.
You've got such long hair.
- Are you cold?
- I'm hot.
So we don't need a towel.
- Do you want towel?
- No.
You've got lovely feet.
They look like my grandma's.
My grandma reads a lot of weird stuff.
She read somewhere about Stalin's son.
And the son got into a POW camp...
together with some English guys...
Erm..
And he'd leave some poop marks
in the toilet.
So they were really pissed off...
They asked him to clean it,
he got offended.
Then...
Then, they forced him to clean it...
And he requested to see the commanding officer
of the camp.
And the German officer didn't want
to talk about poop.
So, Stalin's son threw himself
onto electric fence.
I'm sorry.
This is all I've got.
Thanks.
And...
My grandma says that
Stalin's son died for poop.
'Hi, mom!'
Sorry for what I said earlier,
I got too emotional.
I decided I wouldn't go camping with the girls.
It's not good for my health.
I want to spend the vacation
with you and grandma in the countryside.
Call me back when you're ready.
Don't be a coward!
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.
So serious...
- It's serious!
- OK, focus now!
Don't spread them!
When I wanted to ask my mom
what sanitary pads were for
my brother told me
that women peed their panties
all the time and they used pads as diapers.
My first period story goes like this:
I was the last in my class
to get my first period.
Have some!
And I felt very ashamed of that.
And a friend of mine played a prank on me.
He took a huge sanitary pad
He put some red paint on it
and stuck it to my bag.
It's not funny.
No, it's not.
So don't laugh!
Sorry.
I remember when I got my first period.
We were by the lake with my father.
He really wanted to swim.
I'd been trying to tell him all day
and finally I told him in the evening.
He just looked at me and left the room.
And he didn't come back.
- I can't look at that.
- Keep looking!
The toilet paper has run out!
- Lend me 5 zlotys.
- Not now.
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Fetch some ice!
Put your leg down...
and raise it up.
Hello.
Come in, please.
I'd like to show my report.
I did my stocktaking in the minishop.
I've marked everything with colors.
Why?
I wanted it to be clear and neat.
Because maybe...
I'm willing to take on more tasks.
To learn something.
So you don't think you're learning enough?
Not at all, I just wanted...
I just know a lot of stuff...
I could help with some stuff.
Really?
I've got some observations...
What kind of?
For example...
For example?
I know which plants like sunshine and which prefer shade...
I also know who smokes in the customers' rooms.
- Let's move it or else she'll nitpick again.
- OK.
- This one?
- Yes.
Here!
Wait, I'll take it.
What's wrong with you?
I don't feel well.
- Let me...
- I'm feverish.
I'll take it.
I don't think you have a fever.
But you know...
You may be sick if you're feeling unwell.
What?
It's lactating, I have a baby.
You have a baby?
No, a teletubby! Yes, a baby.
How small is it?
You know... small...
like a loaf of bread.
- I'll take that.
- So, I'll take this.
It must be hard for you here
without your baby.
A small baby...
And where is its... dad?
I've discharged him from his duties
but we're friends.
That one has to wait.
- Shall we smoke?
- Sure.
Is the bitch watching?
Let's go around the corner.
But... you know...
My mom didn't go to college and...
She keeps moaning and moaning...
"And what will happen when I die?"
And?
It's just a burden.
A burden?
Yes, because when you fail
or something's not working
You feel as if you owed her a life.
Do you get me, Babyface?
Babyface gets you.
But... I don't know...
I think that every family
cares for its members.
You're not feeling well?
I feel as if...
I was on the borderline between...
...consciousness and unconsciousness.
You were supposed to take care of the meat.
You're peeling potatoes with that knife?
Put it down and take care of the meat.
Are you deaf?
- Do it yourself!
- I've chopped the onion.
- It's not enough, chop 2 more.
- Fine.
How's the cake coming along?
I don't know.
Onions, potatoes, filling...
And everything else.
OK.
Jesus Christ!
Why are you telling us what to do?
And can you use your brain sometimes?
One person chops,
another one makes the cake,
another one peels potatoes,
I have to clean this,
so you prepare the meat.
- Just do it!
- No!
- Onion guy, can you prepare the meat?
- Nope!
Because?
Because I've done my task
and I'm on a break now.
- And what are you doing?
- Cleaning.
Hey!
And what are you doing now?
Enough with the onion!
But I've got 4 left.
Enough.
Why are you clearing my workstation?
Fuck, what are you doing, man?
Do it!
No.
- Just do it.
- No, I won't.
- Do it!
- I won't.
- I won't do it.
- You will.
- I've chopped the onion.
- You will do it.
- Hmm, delicious.
- You'll do it.
- Soup.
- You will do it.
Why are you telling him what to do?
- Peel the potatoes.
- I won't do it.
- I won't do it!
- You will!
'1, 2, 3, the witch is watching thee!'
One...
- Hello, 'Pawel'!
- Hello, 'Pawel'!
'4, 3, 5, 4, 3, 0.'
'Oh, fuck! I get that you...'
'don't want to talk with father
but call mother at least.'
'Call mother!'
'I had no clue, I'm sorry.'
'It doesn't matter who gave birth to you,
it's important who raised you.'
Isn't it? So...
'Feel free if you want to get blind drunk
but just give us a sign you're alive.'
I've lost my slippers.
A guy comes and says that the pump in his car is broken.
And I say: "Why are you here
if you know what's wrong?"
He says he can't fix it by himself.
I check and the pump doesn't start.
And...
I didn't hear the sound,
when you turn the key,
you normally hear...
And I didn't hear that.
- So I ask him if the high beam is...
- Wait...
OK.
if the high beam is working properly or the horn
and he says there are sometimes problems with them.
So I knew the relays were the problem.
But I tell him it's the pump
and charge him 300.
So I went to the junkyard...
5 zlotys a relay, I bought 5,
I changed them
and the pump's working.
So I earned 260 net.
Nice.
That's it.
For a poor guy I'd do it for free.
But such guys...
You ran your garage with your old man?
- Do you still own it?
- No.
No.
Hello.
And...
we're landing...
Hold on, please.
Watch your head. To the back.
Great.
You were born in 1938, am I right?
My granddad, too.
And you're both from Warsaw.
Right?
Yes!
My granddad didn't know his father,
because he went missing after the war.
No-one knew what had happened to him.
My granddad didn't know what he looked like,
his mother didn't want to talk about that.
No-one actually knew
if he was dead or alive,
and all the photos had been lost.
So he didn't know
what his father looked like.
My granddad had an aunt,
she was an awful gossiper,
and she told my granddad
there was a guy working as
a doorkeeper at the nearby hotel
who looked a lot like his father.
So my granddad was curious
and went there.
So he was in the hotel,
he saw the doorkeeper,
he thought he'd found his actual father,
Could you raise your foot a bit?
It'll make my job a lot easier
if you cooperate.
My granddad would go there every day
and watch the doorkeeper,
how he moved, talked with people,
my granddad wondered
if that could be his father.
'Excuse me!'
'Do you have dirty towels?'
No.
So...
So...
the doorkeeper also noticed
my granddad
he was curious why my granddad
spent so much time there,
and...
so he asked him what he was doing there
and my granddad came up
with some excuses
but he kept coming there.
One day the doorkeeper
came up to my granddad,
he leaned towards him
and my granddad was
overjoyed that he would
maybe say something to him
and they would hit it off.
And the doorkeeper...
told him something.
My granddad didn't want to tell what it was.
Do you understand?
Do you get it?
The doorkeeper turned out to be a pedophile.
You know...
That's terrible, isn't it?
Would you be afraid?
That's awful.
Isn't it?
Isn't?
- Hello, 'Pawel'.
- Hello, 'Pawel'.
'I'm happy you're calling me,
'I can't pick up right now
because I'm boozing it up.'
'Leave a message, please.'
Fucking shit!
Where the fuck am I?
Bricked up.
Of course.
It closes up and gets..
...DARK!
Better?
Let's hope so.
I think I'll throw up again soon.
Poor you!
Maybe it's flu.
It's not flu.
Look, someone got rid of...
They must be closing down
the chapel on the third floor.
Do you know where it is?
Yes, next to the highland-style room.
Yes.
And you?
Are you an Orthodox Church member?
I don't belong to any church.
But I like churches.
They're 'buildings with silence'.
And I belong to the Orthodox Church.
Don't stand up, rest a bit.
- You belong to the Orthodox Church?
- Yep.
You don't look like.
Because I don't have a beard?
No, and aren't you upset they threw
away that holy picture in the garbage?
Yes.
Do you believe in God?
You know...
I actually support all the religions.
Just like... Jesus Christ.
He wasn't a Christian.
He was himself.
But the Orthodox Church has disgraced
itself in the least manner, I guess.
We've disgraced ourselves, too.
OK, enough.
Enough, we'll wait for them.
Come on.
Is she there?
And your baby...
Is it a boy or a girl?
Why?
Just asking.
A boy.
- I have a brother.
- You do?
- Older or younger?
- He's younger.
He has Down Syndrome.
What?
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
They just make me laugh.
That's OK.
He often makes me laugh, too.
I don't know, he's funny.
He's joyful.
He's got...
plenty of love
for people.
He loves animals very much.
He stopped eating meat
when he found out...
The only vegetarian with Down Syndrome
in the world.
That's great.
But my dad forces me to beat him.
What?
Don't you want to ask
why I beat him?
You know...
You beat him 'cause you're stupid.
Sorry, but...
Beating someone because of something
is lame, isn't it?
Maybe...
But...
I beat him because...
my father is afraid because...
we live next to railway tracks.
And he keeps going there.
And we are scared...
he has a pack of dogs
about 7 dogs or so
and he follows...
follows them everywhere.
Dad is worried...
he'll get hit by a train some day.
Dad tells me to beat him
so he'd realize
he shouldn't go there.
I've actually never hit him.
We have an agreement.
I say: "you've misbehaved again"
"So I'm going to pretend I'm beating you"
"and you're going to scream."
So I bang the bed with my hand
and he goes: "ouch, oww".
Now, when I'm not there
I can't keep an eye on him.
And I'm worried Dad's going to
start beating him for real.
Damn.
I'm not good at comforting but
maybe if he has to beat him,
he won't hit him at all.
I'll take the picture with me.
'We've been waiting for you
for 90 minutes.'
Or the diabetic girl...
she's diabetic but she keeps pilfering
sweets from the minishop.
She simply steals.
Or...
the 3 girls who clean customers' rooms
they have parties all night long.
I couldn't sleep at night and I saw them running
skimpily dressed down the corridors.
They took drinks from the minibar.
One of them kept crying all night.
Drunk.
Or the guys from the laundry room...
they had an argument.
One of them was very aggressive.
The guy who
works by the dumpsters
he fakes an illness.
He wants the girl who works with him
to help him.
He wants her to do everything for him.
And she doesn't socialize with anyone.
She just pretends.
And you?
Me?
How do you manage?
I like it here very much, really!
I just can't stand...
how they talk about you.
They call you a witch
a whore
'You have no new messages.'
'If you need help, press 0.'
You don't seem to work at all.
You fraternize with customers.
Don't do that.
The pedestal is still dirty.
From now on, you will clean it
in the morning...
and in the evening.
There are delays in the kitchen,
do something about it!
Do you want to say something?
Drinks keep disappearing from the minibars.
Do you know anything about it?
Look at yourself!
Spruce yourself up a bit!
Hello.
I dont know... theres a beep...
'This is your mom'
'Just call me back, please.'
Look, they throw away everything.
I'll take this for my baby.
What's wrong?
You're not feeling well.
OK, you should lie down.
Take a look at the hotel.
What?
Look at the hotel.
Why?
Just look.
You're funny.
Do it!
OK then.
- Look.
- I'm looking.
And what?
Keep looking.
OK, enough. Let's go.
I thought it was a fever...
But it's not a fever...
No, no, no...
You need to lie down.
You need to lie down,
I'll take that.
Leave it!
Hey, you're sick,
You've got hallucinations.
Leave it!
I'll take it,
it's the last one.
The last one.
Go to bed.
Go to bed, you're sick!
I'm sorry.
What?
I'm sorry!
You're sorry?
Sorry?
Leave that.
- Your baby's safe.
- Shut up!
- Your baby's safe.
- Shut up!
This... this...
This doesn't exist?
This doesn't exist in here?
Doesnt the dumpster exist?
And its lid, here...
It's here.
The garbage is here.
And we are here.
All of this exists!
What's my name?
No...
No... no...
No... no...
No!
Help!
Stand up!
Go.
Hello.
Hello.
1, 2, 3, the witch is watching thee.
I'd like to indicate that we need to
change our delivery method.
Wait, please.
Can I carry on?
- No problem, I'll wait.
- Fine.
So...
At first, we should order frozen meat.
OK.
And then, we should order frozen vegetables.
And on the freezers...
there will be lists
with information about the delivery.
Great.
We need to know the expiry date.
You're going to take care of that.
That's right.
I think it can make our job easier.
We'll be able to work more efficiently.
That's a great idea.
Is something wrong?
No, nothing, carry on, please.
- OK, there's just one problem.
- Yes?
During weddings and similar events
we use up much more meat
so we should change
transportation to streamline...
Shall I leave?
No.
Stay, please. It's good
for her that you are here.
Say it!
I could've told you the same
about the frozen food.
Couldn't I? I don't get it.
- Sorry...
- Shut up!
You told me what you wanted to tell.
Yes.
Did you feel compelled to do something?
Maybe you took pleasure
in denouncing your colleagues.
You didn't feel so self-conscious
any more.
Did you feel good?
Did you feel important?
But it was you who...
What? Encouraged you?
Didn't you?
No.
So it was my fault.
Only mine.
Do you know why?
Can I leave?
Yes, of course.
I'm sorry.
You didn't cross out the towels.
Say something, please.
I've got time,
I can wait.
I don't know...
What?
Say something, anything!
I don't know what boots
you were wearing at the time.
What? Oh, fuck!
Say something. Anything. Fuck!
What?
I don't know... anything...
I don't know what it was like back then...
Because the winter...
in 1944 was very, very...
harsh.
And you...
you were wearing leather boots.
And you remember well...
perfectly well those boots.
Why are you turning it down?
They're not ready for that song yet.
Not now.
Hi.
'Any witnesses?'
'A Russian guy
who was going to his wedding.'
'And a manager from a nearby hotel.'
'I think weve taken her statement.'
'The 19th person has died.
We've got 19 deaths.'
'Let's say 5min ago.
The time of death: 2:23 a.m.'
'- And the survivor?
- A concussion and a broken tooth.'
'Is he going to stay here?
Take him to the hospital.'
'The driver was distracted...
...cigarette ash fell on his foot...'
'What a stupid note!'
'Hurry up!'
'Back your car out
and I'll hurry up.'
'1, 2, 3, the witch goes up.'
Monument
R.I.P.
Students of Lodz Film School 2014-2018
Written and Directed by:
if he needs to smoke the whole way.
Good evening!
What a dark hole!
What's your name?
Mariusz.
Lend me 2 zlotys.
It's impossible to win.
But I am always lucky.
Really? I wish I were too.
- Dinosaur?
- Yeah.
Where are you from?
From Pabianice.
Oh fucking shit!
Fuck!
Give me 2 more!
OK, guys! The smoking break is over.
Please, get back on the bus.
Our journey continues.
Let me just finish the cigarette, please.
- I'll drink it up and we can go.
- 2 more minutes, OK?
- Excuse me!
- Quiet, please!
I'd like to make a toast.
'Cos we don't know each other
and I'd like to change that.
Here's to our internship!
...erm... I wish y'all good luck!
...erm... and good luck!
...and... erm...
Oh, no! He popped another one!
- To our cooperation!
- Here's to life enjoyment!
- Shut up!
- Fine!
OK
This is gonna be the first recording.
Once I had a fever...
... I had a fever...
...a fever.
I had once...
I had once a fever.
And I had...
I had once a...
Shit!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
We're here, I guess...
It's cold.
Has anyone seen the driver?
The driver, anyone?
No... come on...
must be smoking somewhere.
So, you see...
If you smoke the whole way, you shit later on.
You think we can open it?
I think we can't.
Beautiful!
I heard they had a swimming pool.
What did he say?
Is there a swimming pool?
So, 2 hours of sleep and...
Stand in a line!
Done?
Number off, please!
- One.
- Two.
- Three.
- Halt!
From the left, please!
- One.
- Two.
- Three.
- Halt!
Hands out of your pockets!
Turn it off!
1, 2, 3, 4...
5, 6...
7, 8, 9...
Wipe it off!
- 10, 11...
- Take it out!
- 12...
- Start all over again!
1, 2, 3, 4, 5...
6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13...
14, 15, 16, 17...
18, 19.
Someone's missing.
- That guy is his friend.
- No, you are! Homo!
Excuse me.
I think one guy is missing...
... he was wearing a red hoodie.
Fuck, he wasn't on the bus this morning.
He must have run away.
But he was with us at night
so he must be somewhere.
Fine.
Your friend has just lost his chance
to get a credit and pass.
If you don't treat this internship seriously,
you won't pass it.
Customers stay in this hotel.
Customers not guests!
Because they pay for their stay here.
So, this is neither fun nor even studying.
Spit it out!
Spit it out!!!
You are not students of hospitality any more.
And no allowances will be made for you here.
Do you understand?
You're staring like halfwits.
Each of you will attempt every single job available here.
The reception, the laundry room...
the room service, the kitchen, the spa...
and so on and so forth.
But there are things you must do jointly.
As a group.
- For example maintenance work.
- What do you mean by that?
Will you shut your trap?
Or you want to keep swaggering
about how important you are.
I'm sorry.
So maintenance work for the whole group.
After working hours but as the daily workload.
For example clearing the area
around the old dumpsters...
cleaning the old bathrooms near the pedestal...
or cleaning the boiler room.
Additionally, you're going to wait on tables at events such as:
wedding, First Communion and funeral receptions.
The most important lesson for today -
you serve from the right and you clear from the left.
So now you'll be drawing your name tags.
- What do you mean by drawing, because...
- Oh, fuck off!
Excuse me, I don't want to swagger or anythng...
but all our name tags have 'Pawel' on them.
And we all have 'Ania' on ours.
Stand in a line!
Customers just don't care about your actual names.
Theyre utterly insignificant.
No-one's going to learn your actual names
whatever they may be.
They're simply not important!
And that's just my inner joke.
Pin them on!
On the right hand side!
I meant... right from my perspective.
'Let's not be afraid of having fun!'
'Gentlemen, invite ladies to dance!'
'That's beautiful.'
Sasha, the groom is...
going to say a few important words...
that he has prepared for us...
meanwhile, our skillful servers will bring glasses...
and champagne in a moment.
Let's give Sasha some applause!
Good!
This is for...
Thanks, mom!
This is for my friends...
I'm no longer a bachelor for you...
For you I'm dead.
Brother!
Goodbye, my friend, goodbye
My love, you are in my heart.
It was preordained we should part
And be reunited by and by.
no handshake to endure.
Let's have no sadness - furrowed brow.
There's nothing new in dying now
Though living is no newer.
'Bravo!'
Thank you very much!'
'How to pull a crocodile out of water?
I have no idea, it shouldn't bother us.'
And now the wedding cakes!
Come on!
Here comes the table!
Can the Happy Couple come up here, please?
And here is our first wedding cake!
Just one of many.
'Bravo!'
'Everybody to the dance floor!'
'Let's enjoy the night!'
- Those two boxes as well.
- OK.
Ewww!
Oh, shit!
- No!
- Just one!
OK, lock the door!
Give me a bag!
- Slowly!
- Why?
Let me show you a trick.
You pulverize the flint...
- Flint?
- Yes.
Take this!
You take it out...
You lick the cigarette...
You coat it in this...
Magic for the poor.
My old man taught me that.
When I was born he didn't give a shit about me.
- Neither did mine!
- Nor mine.
When he saw me smoking he went mad...
and he...
he brought a pack of cigarettes...
- Look at her!
- How can you smoke like that?
I just can.
Look what the customer's got here!
Do you think it's his better half?
An auntie.
Her boobs are hideous!
Give it to me!
Take a deep drag into your lungs
or else you waste the cigarette.
As if...
"Fuck, mom is coming!"
As if you were scared.
So, when my old man caught me smoking
he went so mad...
he brought a bucket...
he put down a pack of cigarettes...
a bottle of water...
and he made me smoke one cigarette after another...
and wash them down with water
just to make me throw up...
Typical!
And I finally threw up...
And then he kept bragging to his friends
how hardy I was...
My granddad died and left a cigarette
in his liquor cabinet.
And I took it and my grandma caught me...
And... Since then,
I think I've been cursed...
I keep on smoking.
- I dreamed about being depressed...
- Move!
Hi. Is there anything else?
I'll be in the basement.
What's the difference between
butter and a hooker?
Greasiness?
Not really.
Butter is difficult to spread.
That's a good one.
That's funny.
- At the jungle...
- In the jungle.
- What?
- IN the jungle! Not AT the jungle.
OK, IN the jungle, a store has opened up...
It's two p.m. and there's been
a line outside since 6 a.m.
And suddenly a hare is elbowing through the crowd:
"Excuse me!"
"Excuse me!"
He gets to the front
but a tiger and a hippo are first in line
"No line jumping!"
"We've been waiting here since morning.
To the end of the line with you!"
So, the hare was back at the end of the line.
So, the hare goes again:
"Excuse me!"
"Excuse me!"
And again, they shout:
"Go to the end of the line!"
So, the hare sat down in the bush,
he sobbed and sighed:
"Fuck, how am I supposed to open
my store today?"
What? Sorry,
I didn't hear the punch line.
Nothing!
- He couldn't open the store.
- Oh.
I know another one about 2 deaf owls.
One says: "Kiss my ass!"
And the other says: "Kiss my ass!"
Two deaf people are talking:
"- Are you going fishing?"
"- No, I'm going fishing."
"Oh, what a pity!
I thought you'd go fishing with me."
Is that all?
- Luckily, it is.
- It was the same joke!
'Massage received from:
763735750'
'Hi, dude! Visit Kaska's profile
and check out comments below her photo.'
'You're gonna laugh your ass off.
Take care. Bye!'
It looks like cum.
One more time.
What?
Shall I slow it down?
Let's swap places.
What?
Shall we swap places?
Oh shit!
Do you need a fucking invitation or what?
Shall I send it to you with a red ribbon?
No, I just...
I'm wondering why we got
the worst job possible.
Well, I don't know...
Stop bitching!
If you hadn't listened to music
and waited some tables instead,
You wouldn't have to come here...
'PAWEL'.
Imagine it's your grandma's tomb.
- You're spilling water.
- I wonder what HER name is?
- Whose?
- HERS.
Barb Dwyer...
- Which one's the first name?
- Barb.
I think her name is something like, you know...
Hedwig.
Hedwig?
Hattie.
Hedwig and the angry inch.
Get down to work,
'cause she can see us through the window.
- Which one?
- That one.
She touches herself while looking at me.
She unbuttons her shirt.
Her hand goes down...
And there's nothing.
Just like the Barbie Doll.
OK, get down to work, will you?
1, 2, 3, the witch is watching thee,
through the window.
- Which one?
- That one!
Give me 2 zlotys, will you?
Firstly, garbage.
Garbage must be disposed of at the dumpsters.
And not at the door!
Secondly, the pedestal is still dirty...
2 people are needed in the kitchen
to do the dishes
and to wait on tables,
thatll be you and... you!
The other positions remain unchanged.
But we were supposed to change...
But you are good at
what you're doing now.
Here we go.
You've got such long hair.
- Are you cold?
- I'm hot.
So we don't need a towel.
- Do you want towel?
- No.
You've got lovely feet.
They look like my grandma's.
My grandma reads a lot of weird stuff.
She read somewhere about Stalin's son.
And the son got into a POW camp...
together with some English guys...
Erm..
And he'd leave some poop marks
in the toilet.
So they were really pissed off...
They asked him to clean it,
he got offended.
Then...
Then, they forced him to clean it...
And he requested to see the commanding officer
of the camp.
And the German officer didn't want
to talk about poop.
So, Stalin's son threw himself
onto electric fence.
I'm sorry.
This is all I've got.
Thanks.
And...
My grandma says that
Stalin's son died for poop.
'Hi, mom!'
Sorry for what I said earlier,
I got too emotional.
I decided I wouldn't go camping with the girls.
It's not good for my health.
I want to spend the vacation
with you and grandma in the countryside.
Call me back when you're ready.
Don't be a coward!
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.
So serious...
- It's serious!
- OK, focus now!
Don't spread them!
When I wanted to ask my mom
what sanitary pads were for
my brother told me
that women peed their panties
all the time and they used pads as diapers.
My first period story goes like this:
I was the last in my class
to get my first period.
Have some!
And I felt very ashamed of that.
And a friend of mine played a prank on me.
He took a huge sanitary pad
He put some red paint on it
and stuck it to my bag.
It's not funny.
No, it's not.
So don't laugh!
Sorry.
I remember when I got my first period.
We were by the lake with my father.
He really wanted to swim.
I'd been trying to tell him all day
and finally I told him in the evening.
He just looked at me and left the room.
And he didn't come back.
- I can't look at that.
- Keep looking!
The toilet paper has run out!
- Lend me 5 zlotys.
- Not now.
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
Fetch some ice!
Put your leg down...
and raise it up.
Hello.
Come in, please.
I'd like to show my report.
I did my stocktaking in the minishop.
I've marked everything with colors.
Why?
I wanted it to be clear and neat.
Because maybe...
I'm willing to take on more tasks.
To learn something.
So you don't think you're learning enough?
Not at all, I just wanted...
I just know a lot of stuff...
I could help with some stuff.
Really?
I've got some observations...
What kind of?
For example...
For example?
I know which plants like sunshine and which prefer shade...
I also know who smokes in the customers' rooms.
- Let's move it or else she'll nitpick again.
- OK.
- This one?
- Yes.
Here!
Wait, I'll take it.
What's wrong with you?
I don't feel well.
- Let me...
- I'm feverish.
I'll take it.
I don't think you have a fever.
But you know...
You may be sick if you're feeling unwell.
What?
It's lactating, I have a baby.
You have a baby?
No, a teletubby! Yes, a baby.
How small is it?
You know... small...
like a loaf of bread.
- I'll take that.
- So, I'll take this.
It must be hard for you here
without your baby.
A small baby...
And where is its... dad?
I've discharged him from his duties
but we're friends.
That one has to wait.
- Shall we smoke?
- Sure.
Is the bitch watching?
Let's go around the corner.
But... you know...
My mom didn't go to college and...
She keeps moaning and moaning...
"And what will happen when I die?"
And?
It's just a burden.
A burden?
Yes, because when you fail
or something's not working
You feel as if you owed her a life.
Do you get me, Babyface?
Babyface gets you.
But... I don't know...
I think that every family
cares for its members.
You're not feeling well?
I feel as if...
I was on the borderline between...
...consciousness and unconsciousness.
You were supposed to take care of the meat.
You're peeling potatoes with that knife?
Put it down and take care of the meat.
Are you deaf?
- Do it yourself!
- I've chopped the onion.
- It's not enough, chop 2 more.
- Fine.
How's the cake coming along?
I don't know.
Onions, potatoes, filling...
And everything else.
OK.
Jesus Christ!
Why are you telling us what to do?
And can you use your brain sometimes?
One person chops,
another one makes the cake,
another one peels potatoes,
I have to clean this,
so you prepare the meat.
- Just do it!
- No!
- Onion guy, can you prepare the meat?
- Nope!
Because?
Because I've done my task
and I'm on a break now.
- And what are you doing?
- Cleaning.
Hey!
And what are you doing now?
Enough with the onion!
But I've got 4 left.
Enough.
Why are you clearing my workstation?
Fuck, what are you doing, man?
Do it!
No.
- Just do it.
- No, I won't.
- Do it!
- I won't.
- I won't do it.
- You will.
- I've chopped the onion.
- You will do it.
- Hmm, delicious.
- You'll do it.
- Soup.
- You will do it.
Why are you telling him what to do?
- Peel the potatoes.
- I won't do it.
- I won't do it!
- You will!
'1, 2, 3, the witch is watching thee!'
One...
- Hello, 'Pawel'!
- Hello, 'Pawel'!
'4, 3, 5, 4, 3, 0.'
'Oh, fuck! I get that you...'
'don't want to talk with father
but call mother at least.'
'Call mother!'
'I had no clue, I'm sorry.'
'It doesn't matter who gave birth to you,
it's important who raised you.'
Isn't it? So...
'Feel free if you want to get blind drunk
but just give us a sign you're alive.'
I've lost my slippers.
A guy comes and says that the pump in his car is broken.
And I say: "Why are you here
if you know what's wrong?"
He says he can't fix it by himself.
I check and the pump doesn't start.
And...
I didn't hear the sound,
when you turn the key,
you normally hear...
And I didn't hear that.
- So I ask him if the high beam is...
- Wait...
OK.
if the high beam is working properly or the horn
and he says there are sometimes problems with them.
So I knew the relays were the problem.
But I tell him it's the pump
and charge him 300.
So I went to the junkyard...
5 zlotys a relay, I bought 5,
I changed them
and the pump's working.
So I earned 260 net.
Nice.
That's it.
For a poor guy I'd do it for free.
But such guys...
You ran your garage with your old man?
- Do you still own it?
- No.
No.
Hello.
And...
we're landing...
Hold on, please.
Watch your head. To the back.
Great.
You were born in 1938, am I right?
My granddad, too.
And you're both from Warsaw.
Right?
Yes!
My granddad didn't know his father,
because he went missing after the war.
No-one knew what had happened to him.
My granddad didn't know what he looked like,
his mother didn't want to talk about that.
No-one actually knew
if he was dead or alive,
and all the photos had been lost.
So he didn't know
what his father looked like.
My granddad had an aunt,
she was an awful gossiper,
and she told my granddad
there was a guy working as
a doorkeeper at the nearby hotel
who looked a lot like his father.
So my granddad was curious
and went there.
So he was in the hotel,
he saw the doorkeeper,
he thought he'd found his actual father,
Could you raise your foot a bit?
It'll make my job a lot easier
if you cooperate.
My granddad would go there every day
and watch the doorkeeper,
how he moved, talked with people,
my granddad wondered
if that could be his father.
'Excuse me!'
'Do you have dirty towels?'
No.
So...
So...
the doorkeeper also noticed
my granddad
he was curious why my granddad
spent so much time there,
and...
so he asked him what he was doing there
and my granddad came up
with some excuses
but he kept coming there.
One day the doorkeeper
came up to my granddad,
he leaned towards him
and my granddad was
overjoyed that he would
maybe say something to him
and they would hit it off.
And the doorkeeper...
told him something.
My granddad didn't want to tell what it was.
Do you understand?
Do you get it?
The doorkeeper turned out to be a pedophile.
You know...
That's terrible, isn't it?
Would you be afraid?
That's awful.
Isn't it?
Isn't?
- Hello, 'Pawel'.
- Hello, 'Pawel'.
'I'm happy you're calling me,
'I can't pick up right now
because I'm boozing it up.'
'Leave a message, please.'
Fucking shit!
Where the fuck am I?
Bricked up.
Of course.
It closes up and gets..
...DARK!
Better?
Let's hope so.
I think I'll throw up again soon.
Poor you!
Maybe it's flu.
It's not flu.
Look, someone got rid of...
They must be closing down
the chapel on the third floor.
Do you know where it is?
Yes, next to the highland-style room.
Yes.
And you?
Are you an Orthodox Church member?
I don't belong to any church.
But I like churches.
They're 'buildings with silence'.
And I belong to the Orthodox Church.
Don't stand up, rest a bit.
- You belong to the Orthodox Church?
- Yep.
You don't look like.
Because I don't have a beard?
No, and aren't you upset they threw
away that holy picture in the garbage?
Yes.
Do you believe in God?
You know...
I actually support all the religions.
Just like... Jesus Christ.
He wasn't a Christian.
He was himself.
But the Orthodox Church has disgraced
itself in the least manner, I guess.
We've disgraced ourselves, too.
OK, enough.
Enough, we'll wait for them.
Come on.
Is she there?
And your baby...
Is it a boy or a girl?
Why?
Just asking.
A boy.
- I have a brother.
- You do?
- Older or younger?
- He's younger.
He has Down Syndrome.
What?
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
They just make me laugh.
That's OK.
He often makes me laugh, too.
I don't know, he's funny.
He's joyful.
He's got...
plenty of love
for people.
He loves animals very much.
He stopped eating meat
when he found out...
The only vegetarian with Down Syndrome
in the world.
That's great.
But my dad forces me to beat him.
What?
Don't you want to ask
why I beat him?
You know...
You beat him 'cause you're stupid.
Sorry, but...
Beating someone because of something
is lame, isn't it?
Maybe...
But...
I beat him because...
my father is afraid because...
we live next to railway tracks.
And he keeps going there.
And we are scared...
he has a pack of dogs
about 7 dogs or so
and he follows...
follows them everywhere.
Dad is worried...
he'll get hit by a train some day.
Dad tells me to beat him
so he'd realize
he shouldn't go there.
I've actually never hit him.
We have an agreement.
I say: "you've misbehaved again"
"So I'm going to pretend I'm beating you"
"and you're going to scream."
So I bang the bed with my hand
and he goes: "ouch, oww".
Now, when I'm not there
I can't keep an eye on him.
And I'm worried Dad's going to
start beating him for real.
Damn.
I'm not good at comforting but
maybe if he has to beat him,
he won't hit him at all.
I'll take the picture with me.
'We've been waiting for you
for 90 minutes.'
Or the diabetic girl...
she's diabetic but she keeps pilfering
sweets from the minishop.
She simply steals.
Or...
the 3 girls who clean customers' rooms
they have parties all night long.
I couldn't sleep at night and I saw them running
skimpily dressed down the corridors.
They took drinks from the minibar.
One of them kept crying all night.
Drunk.
Or the guys from the laundry room...
they had an argument.
One of them was very aggressive.
The guy who
works by the dumpsters
he fakes an illness.
He wants the girl who works with him
to help him.
He wants her to do everything for him.
And she doesn't socialize with anyone.
She just pretends.
And you?
Me?
How do you manage?
I like it here very much, really!
I just can't stand...
how they talk about you.
They call you a witch
a whore
'You have no new messages.'
'If you need help, press 0.'
You don't seem to work at all.
You fraternize with customers.
Don't do that.
The pedestal is still dirty.
From now on, you will clean it
in the morning...
and in the evening.
There are delays in the kitchen,
do something about it!
Do you want to say something?
Drinks keep disappearing from the minibars.
Do you know anything about it?
Look at yourself!
Spruce yourself up a bit!
Hello.
I dont know... theres a beep...
'This is your mom'
'Just call me back, please.'
Look, they throw away everything.
I'll take this for my baby.
What's wrong?
You're not feeling well.
OK, you should lie down.
Take a look at the hotel.
What?
Look at the hotel.
Why?
Just look.
You're funny.
Do it!
OK then.
- Look.
- I'm looking.
And what?
Keep looking.
OK, enough. Let's go.
I thought it was a fever...
But it's not a fever...
No, no, no...
You need to lie down.
You need to lie down,
I'll take that.
Leave it!
Hey, you're sick,
You've got hallucinations.
Leave it!
I'll take it,
it's the last one.
The last one.
Go to bed.
Go to bed, you're sick!
I'm sorry.
What?
I'm sorry!
You're sorry?
Sorry?
Leave that.
- Your baby's safe.
- Shut up!
- Your baby's safe.
- Shut up!
This... this...
This doesn't exist?
This doesn't exist in here?
Doesnt the dumpster exist?
And its lid, here...
It's here.
The garbage is here.
And we are here.
All of this exists!
What's my name?
No...
No... no...
No... no...
No!
Help!
Stand up!
Go.
Hello.
Hello.
1, 2, 3, the witch is watching thee.
I'd like to indicate that we need to
change our delivery method.
Wait, please.
Can I carry on?
- No problem, I'll wait.
- Fine.
So...
At first, we should order frozen meat.
OK.
And then, we should order frozen vegetables.
And on the freezers...
there will be lists
with information about the delivery.
Great.
We need to know the expiry date.
You're going to take care of that.
That's right.
I think it can make our job easier.
We'll be able to work more efficiently.
That's a great idea.
Is something wrong?
No, nothing, carry on, please.
- OK, there's just one problem.
- Yes?
During weddings and similar events
we use up much more meat
so we should change
transportation to streamline...
Shall I leave?
No.
Stay, please. It's good
for her that you are here.
Say it!
I could've told you the same
about the frozen food.
Couldn't I? I don't get it.
- Sorry...
- Shut up!
You told me what you wanted to tell.
Yes.
Did you feel compelled to do something?
Maybe you took pleasure
in denouncing your colleagues.
You didn't feel so self-conscious
any more.
Did you feel good?
Did you feel important?
But it was you who...
What? Encouraged you?
Didn't you?
No.
So it was my fault.
Only mine.
Do you know why?
Can I leave?
Yes, of course.
I'm sorry.
You didn't cross out the towels.
Say something, please.
I've got time,
I can wait.
I don't know...
What?
Say something, anything!
I don't know what boots
you were wearing at the time.
What? Oh, fuck!
Say something. Anything. Fuck!
What?
I don't know... anything...
I don't know what it was like back then...
Because the winter...
in 1944 was very, very...
harsh.
And you...
you were wearing leather boots.
And you remember well...
perfectly well those boots.
Why are you turning it down?
They're not ready for that song yet.
Not now.
Hi.
'Any witnesses?'
'A Russian guy
who was going to his wedding.'
'And a manager from a nearby hotel.'
'I think weve taken her statement.'
'The 19th person has died.
We've got 19 deaths.'
'Let's say 5min ago.
The time of death: 2:23 a.m.'
'- And the survivor?
- A concussion and a broken tooth.'
'Is he going to stay here?
Take him to the hospital.'
'The driver was distracted...
...cigarette ash fell on his foot...'
'What a stupid note!'
'Hurry up!'
'Back your car out
and I'll hurry up.'
'1, 2, 3, the witch goes up.'
Monument
R.I.P.
Students of Lodz Film School 2014-2018
Written and Directed by: