Moving On (2022) Movie Script
1
[amusing string music]
I'm gonna miss you.
I wish I didn't have to go.
I love you so much.
Now, you're gonna take your
pills, sweetheart, huh?
All right, don't
just chew 'em up,
and spit 'em out.
[chuckles]
I can't believe you're
traveling, Mom. [sighs]
I know how much you hate to fly.
Yeah, I, I do, but some
things are important.
Thank you for letting
me leave him with you.
Of course. He's a cutie.
Hey, kids, come
say hi to Grandma!
[kid] I'm on the phone!
So, um, the yellow
pills are twice a day,
-and the blue ones once.
-I know.
Mom, you gave me
the list, remember?
Yeah, I know, but.
And these are his toys.
And he sleeps with Mr. Moose.
Hey, if you guys don't
come in here right now,
I'm gonna flush your
phones down the toilet!
I don't wanna see them.
Or, I mean, I, I'm,
I don't wanna disturb them.
I know they're busy.
And hey, don't you yell so much.
I don't want you
to stress him out.
-[daughter] Mom.
-He's already, he's freaked.
I don't think he's
stressed. He's fine.
[Tommy] Hi, Grandma.
[Claire] Oh, hi, Tommy.
So, who died?
Oh, an old, old friend.
Hey, maybe you'll play
with Dashel sometime.
Maybe.
OK, um...
Oh.
If anything should happen,
know that I love you, Dashel.
Yeah, Mommy loves you and
you're gonna be taken care of.
OK, Mom, stop
being so dramatic.
OK, flying is very safe.
You'll be back
before you know it.
Nothing is gonna happen.
[amusing mischievous music]
[mourners murmuring
indistinctly]
[Allie] Claire.
Allie.
[Allie] So glad you came.
Thanks for letting me know.
Of course.
Mom really missed you.
She really loved you.
-I loved her.
-[kids laughing]
Stop it. I can see you.
Three now.
I have three.
Can you believe it? Stop it.
Dad will be really
glad you came.
It'll mean a lot to him.
Yes.
She was a wonderful woman.
Wonderful.
I'm wearing high heels
in honor of Joyce.
-Oh.
-She had such great legs
and she always loved
to show them off.
She did. She had the best legs.
[chuckles]
Claire! Oh, you made it.
Oh, that would mean
so much to her.
This is Claire, one of
Joyce's oldest friends.
They were at college together.
Claire lives in Ohio now.
We're so sorry for your loss.
[Howard] Oh, bless you, darling.
Call us and come over
to dinner, Howard.
Thank you, I will.
[mourner] We love you.
-Oh, Claire.
-Howard. I'm gonna kill you.
Now that she's gone,
now that it can't hurt her,
I'm gonna kill you...
this weekend.
I'm gonna do it this weekend.
[amusing mischievous music]
Howard.
-Oh, dear Howard.
-[Howard] Oh, hi, hi, hi.
-Oh, you dear man.
-Yeah.
I'm so, so sorry.
You think you'd get used to it,
used to the idea of loss.
When you see it this
far over the horizon,
it's like that shot in
Lawrence of Arabia.
You know, the little speck
that gets closer and closer.
[mourner coughs]
I learned a lot.
I changed a lot.
I learned patience, humility.
-I learned to enjoy lattes.
-[mourners chuckling softly]
Some of you know that Joyce
just loved her afternoon lattes,
and she got me addicted
to them, as well.
Sometimes I think I
can still hear her say,
"Howie, go to the cafe
and get some lattes, will ya?"
[mourners laughing]
[Howard sighs]
I met Joyce in New York.
We were married seven
months after we met,
and I have no regrets.
None.
Darling, I just want you to know
from the bottom of my heart--
Is this the wrong entrance?
It said chapel on the door.
-Oh.
-Howard.
Did I interrupt your eulogy?
God, I'm sorry.
That's all right, Evelyn.
It's all right.
Please.
Everyone, this is Evelyn.
Evelyn was Joyce's college
roommate, believe it or not.
Why wouldn't they believe it?
[Howard] Well, it's
just an expression.
I was in the back
using the restroom.
-It's like a maze.
-Understood.
-A labyrinth.
-Yeah.
Nice photo.
A bit sanitized, maybe.
-What?
-Well, she looks pleasant,
but Joyce was never
just pleasant.
She was always sparkly.
Sparkly?
Evelyn, would you
mind taking a seat?
Would you mind, please?
I'm in the middle of
my eulogy to my wife.
My wife of 51 years
has just died!
I understand.
My friend has died,
my friend of 60 years.
How about that?
-Isn't that something?
-[Howard sighs]
Ah, well, go ahead.
You were saying something
about no regrets,
darling Joyce,
bottom of my heart.
Yes.
I was about to say that
I admired her courage
in fighting this awful disease.
La la la la
La la la la
La la la la
La la la la
La la la la la
Evelyn.
Evie.
It's, it's me. It's Claire.
Hi, Claire. I know it's you.
I haven't lost my marbles yet.
Or my eyesight.
Get in. Let me give you a ride.
Do you have a driver's license?
I do.
I took the test two months ago.
And you passed?
Did you bribe the instructor?
I didn't have to.
I'm an excellent driver!
I trust the bus more.
Oh, get in.
I need to talk to you.
About what?
What do you need to talk about?
-I--
-[horn honking]
-[driver] Come on, move it!
-God, hold your horses!
What kind of person honks
a horn in a graveyard?
-Jeez.
-Pass! There's room! Go!
-You jerk.
-[driver] Stupid!
Get in, Evie.
I, I need to talk to you.
I told him.
You told him what?
I told him I was gonna
kill him this weekend.
I'm gonna kill the bastard.
I could chat a little bit.
-[Claire coughs]
-You're not gonna kill anyone.
I am.
Oh, you've always had big ideas,
-but very little follow through.
-Not true.
Oh, what about the time
you were gonna go out
in the middle of the
night and paint a vagina
on that fraternity house?
I don't remember that.
You talked about it for weeks.
You were gonna do
it for homecoming.
No kidding. What happened?
Nothing. Nothing happened.
You never did it.
And what about the time
you were gonna become
a lounge singer?
Or drive down to Peru?
There's still time.
[Evelyn] Ah.
[chuckles]
Are you still playing?
Of course I'm still playing.
Without my cello, I'd be lost.
Completely lost.
-Well, good for you.
-Mmm.
I'm not with the
orchestra anymore.
I'm with a couple of ensembles.
One is devoted totally
to modern composers,
and the other is all Bach.
Do you still have that
cute, little house?
[Evelyn] Mmm-hmm.
Oh, that's wonderful, wonderful.
So I was wondering if,
if you could help me.
What? Murder him?
There's a little
thing called jail.
Nice place to visit, but you
wouldn't wanna live there.
And let's take a moment
to remember our beautiful,
kind, happy friend whose
funeral we attended today.
I've thought about her.
I prioritized her
happiness over mine,
over my, my sanity.
She never asked
you to do anything.
And I told you, I told
you to go to the police.
Yeah, you did.
They wouldn't have believed me.
-I mean, back then?
-[Evelyn] Hmm.
Why were you alone
in that house?
You knew your friend
was out of town.
[Evelyn] Hmm.
Why were you alone in
your best friend's house
with her husband?
Mmm, best friend?
I thought I was your
best friend at that time.
You were both my best friends.
I'm just yanking your chain.
Would've ruined her life
if I had told the police.
We'll never know.
Her life might have been better.
So...
what's the plan?
-I'm gonna shoot him.
-[Evelyn] Mmm.
I'm gonna buy a gun
and I'm
gonna take it to the wake.
-[Evelyn] Mmm-hmm.
-Do you wanna come with me?
Sure, Scarface. Sounds like fun.
[Evelyn chuckles]
[soft horn music]
Oh.
-Uh, hello.
-Hello.
-I'd like to buy a handgun.
-[Clerk] Mmm-hmm.
Something not too heavy, please.
And maybe a silencer.
Well, I can't sell
you a silencer.
You can't legally buy a
suppressor in California.
-Ah.
-You can wear earplugs.
Well, what kind of firearm
would you recommend for me?
I want something that's light.
[Clerk] Well, what are
you gonna use it for?
Tell him.
-Sport shooting, self-defense?
-Yeah, self-defense.
[Clerk] OK, well, how about
this little Davis Derringer?
Fits right in your
pocket or your pocketbook
-right next to your keys.
-Oh, it's cute.
Very.
22. caliber, two shots.
Nice back up piece.
-Wanna hold it?
-Oh, sure.
-It's used. Cost about $125.
-Light.
-How's the recoil?
-Recoil?
Not gonna lie.
It has a little kick.
Not much there to
absorb the shock.
Do you have arthritis
in your wrist and hands?
Oh, a little bit in
my, in my left wrist,
but I take medication.
Hips are my problem.
Mine, too. I got a hip
replacement last year.
Ah, how'd that go for you?
Pretty good, thanks.
I also recommend
this Beretta 92.
It looks heavier.
It has very little recoil.
Very smooth.
Feels like a Cadillac.
-[Evelyn] Mmm.
-[gun clicks]
I think the key here
is to use a load
that lessens the kick.
These nine millimeter
bullets are very lightweight.
Hollow point for maximum damage.
Oh, maximum damage sounds neat.
Yeah, I think I'll
take the smaller gun.
OK. I'll need your California
driver's license
or your Cal ID,
and you could take the
handgun safety test
right here in the store.
I don't have a
California license.
[Clerk] You don't have
a California license?
No, I live in Ohio.
Then I can't sell
you a gun, sorry.
Well, darn it, we tried.
So did you get that
out of your system?
The whole Dirty Harry/
Death Wish thing?
No, I didn't get it
out of my system. God.
I should have bought a gun
at home and brought it,
but couldn't have
got it on the plane.
Oh, Claire. It's been decades.
And not like a
couple of decades,
it's been four and
a half decades.
It was yesterday.
Yeah.
Oh, I remember the
necklace Joyce was wearing
in the photo at
the funeral home.
I gave her that necklace.
-I had one, too.
-Do you have any poison?
I have a cyanide pill in case
I'm captured by the enemy.
You can have it.
I'm just gonna have to
stab him in the stomach.
[Evelyn laughs incredulously]
-Are you going to the wake?
-No.
I'll read about it in
the newspaper tomorrow.
I have a rehearsal.
You hate him, too.
I don't hate anybody.
It's too exhausting.
Well, let, let me give you
a, a ride to your house.
I think I'd rather take the bus.
Evie.
Evie?
You're the only
person I ever told.
Jesus, really?
Well, except for the therapist.
I had a therapist after
my second divorce.
Clearly it's done
wonders for you.
Evie, come with me.
[Evelyn] Bye, Claire.
[soft organ music]
Follow me until you
don't know where you are
Follow me until you
don't know where you are
Closing your eyes when
you're reaching with his
Falling down flat when
you don't understand
[aide] N23.
Who I am
[Evelyn] Hey, Ernie.
You ain't nothin'
you never won
[Evelyn] How's it hangin', Phil?
You don't do nothin'
I don't do
You shadow
You ain't nothin'
you never won
You ain't nothin'
you've ever done
You don't do
nothin' I don't do
You shadow
[Evelyn sighs]
[strings plucking softly]
[somber violin music]
[violin music stops]
Oh.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
-Oh, God damn it!
-[bow snaps]
[knuckles rapping]
Yes?
[bow clatters]
Yes.
Coming.
Oh.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Remember me?
Of course I remember you.
Are you visiting
your grandpa again?
-My parents are over there.
-[Evelyn] Mmm.
-I wanted to come say hi.
-Well, thanks.
[James] Can I come in?
Sure, for a second.
Aren't your parents
gonna miss you?
They didn't miss me last time
that day we played checkers.
-[Evelyn sighs]
-Wanna play again?
You know, um, I can't right now.
How's your grandfather?
How's Walt?
He wants to teach me how to
throw a ball and shoot a gun.
Oh, does he have one?
He has a baseball.
But does he have a gun?
[James] Yeah.
He has a gun.
I think so.
He showed it to me.
He says he wants to teach me.
Huh.
Could we do that other
thing we did last time?
The fashion show?
Well, you did look
cool in those heels.
Ah, but I don't
have time right now.
-Oh.
-Wait, wait.
Come here. Come here.
Tell you what.
You can choose something
from this to keep.
Really?
Why not? Who else am
I gonna leave them to?
[James giggles]
Oh, except you can't have
this one or this one,
and this one I got in
Seoul when I traveled
all over with the orchestra.
Can I have this?
Your ears aren't
pierced, are they? [tuts]
No.
Not those, but how about these?
These are clip on.
See, you open them like that
and you clip them,
pop 'em right onto
your earlobes.
They don't pinch, do they?
No, it's fine.
[Evelyn] Well, go
look at yourself.
Wow.
They're beautiful.
You're a beautiful kid. [sighs]
-Oh.
-[soft string music]
Better get back to your parents.
[James giggles]
Hey. Hey.
[soft string music]
Ah, Joyce.
Ah, to hell with all this.
[Western showdown music]
[child screaming]
[child laughing]
[waiter] May I take your coat?
[mourners chatting indistinctly]
[Howard] Yes, so.
Where's the kitchen?
Kitchen or the bathroom?
-Kitchen.
-Right in there.
It's pretty busy
in there right now.
Good.
[caterer] Waiter, over here.
Oh. You looking
for the bathroom?
No.
Nope, that's not
the right order.
I want tomato, olive, cheese.
Tomato, olive, cheese.
Can I help you, ma'am?
No, thanks.
No, wait! What are you doing?
Those go back in there
for another five minutes.
[amusing mischievous music]
-I just love chocolate.
-I know.
Oh, great. Is that for me?
Thanks.
Claire, have you ever met Wendy?
Wendy brought us this
beautiful batch of brownies.
Isn't that wonderful?
The least I could do.
Your mom was so wonderful.
-[Allie] Thank you.
-I was her art teacher.
She was a very talented painter.
Was she?
-[Wendy] Oh, yes.
-Thank you.
Would you do me a favor and
run that back to the kitchen?
Guys, no more sugar.
[kid] One?
[Allie] No, you're
gonna go crazy. No.
[disquieting string music]
[Claire breathes heavily]
-[disquieting string music]
-[voices echoing indistinctly]
Claire?
Claire?
It's me, Ralph.
Ralph.
What are you doing here?
Oh, Howard just
called me out of the blue
and invited me to the memorial.
I wasn't busy, so I came.
When did he call you?
A few hours ago.
I hope you don't
mind that I'm here.
I was very fond of Joyce.
You two were great friends.
And he told me
that you were here.
You look nice, Ralph.
[Ralph] Thank you.
I'm glad you're still alive.
[Ralph laughs]
Me, too.
It's good to see you.
Why are you carrying that knife?
Oh, I was gonna stab someone.
[Ralph laughs] Come on.
[Ralph and Claire laugh]
Crab cakes?
Would you take this to the
kitchen for me? Thank you.
Is that a no on the crab cakes?
That's a no, yes. Thank you.
[glasses clink]
So, how are you?
How's your husband?
We were divorced 15 years ago.
[Ralph] Oh, I'm, I'm sorry.
How's your wife?
She passed about four years ago.
Oh, I'm sorry.
But she lived a good,
full life
and I loved her deeply.
Well, that's good.
I have no idea why I said that.
I mean, it just
goes without saying.
I guess, guess I'm
a little nervous.
Why?
Well, it isn't very
often that you--
Not very often that you
run into your ex-wife?
Not very often.
Any kids?
I have one kid, two grandkids.
Great-grands?
-They're not that great.
-[Ralph chuckles]
No, I have no great-grandkids.
-I have a corgi.
-Mmm.
Pictures?
Of course.
How could I not, right?
-[Ralph] Of course.
-It's what we do these days.
[Ralph chuckles]
Let me see here.
[Claire] Come on, Dashel.
Come on.
Give me a smile.
-Heel. Oh, good boy.
-[Ralph laughs]
[Claire] He's cute, huh?
[Ralph] Ah, dogs always
loved you, Claire.
Yeah, you?
Oh.
-Lovely.
-[Ralph chuckles]
Lovely.
[Ralph clears throat]
It's really nice to see you.
I hope I didn't scare you.
Oh, come on.
You're as beautiful as ever.
[chuckles] And you're
as kind as ever.
Look at you two lovebirds.
-Or love pterodactyls, maybe.
-[Ralph chuckles]
Evelyn.
-Hi, Ralph.
-[Claire] You came.
I didn't miss the
carnage, did I?
[Allie] Excuse me.
Quite down, everybody.
Please gather 'round. Thank you.
I think someone is
about to give a speech.
Oh, good.
Perfect timing.
And I know my mother,
my mother would be so
happy to see you all here.
She'd really appreciate
it. I know Dad and I do.
So please eat, drink,
and raise a toast to my mom,
the best mom in the world.
-[group] To Joyce.
-[mourner] Yes.
[glass clinking]
I have a few words to say.
Please.
This is Evelyn, one of my
mother's oldest friends.
Joyce was a wonderful woman.
She certainly was.
A great cook,
a devoted wife and mother,
a dotting grandmother.
-[mourner] Oh.
-[mourner] Mmm-hmm.
And for junior and
senior years in college
and then six months
in New York City,
after graduation she was
my roommate and my lover.
-[mourner gasps]
-[mourner] Oh.
Jesus, what?
And this was a gay until
graduation type of thing.
This was who she was,
but not who she wanted to be.
[Howard laughs heartily]
God!
I'm sorry, Howard.
What's so funny?
You are, Evelyn.
You've always had such
a great sense of humor.
Not really.
People think I'm being funny,
but I'm really just talking.
It's very inappropriate,
Evelyn, and untrue.
And not something my
children needed to hear.
Oh, was it?
Did you even understand
what I was saying, honey?
You said you love Grandma.
That's right.
That's exactly what I said.
Adorable grandkids.
She got that in the
transaction, I guess.
She told me.
She told me that
you were delusional.
That you were
infatuated with her.
I mean, we used
to laugh about it.
She thought you were funny,
I can tell you that.
She told me you were cruel.
My father is one of the
kindest people I know.
Oh, is he?
[Allie] I think you
should leave now.
I tend to agree.
Howard, you didn't deserve her.
Can anyone give me a ride?
So what did you
think of my big news?
I knew.
The two of you always
staring at each other,
mooning over each other.
So why didn't you say something?
Well, why didn't you?
Joyce didn't want to.
Guess I didn't
either at the time.
It was a different time.
No, you have always
underestimated me.
Here, pullover. Here
at the bus stop.
What gives?
I can drive you home.
What are you afraid of?
[subdued horn and string music]
[aide speaking indistinctly
over loudspeaker]
Hey.
[subdued horn and string music]
Ta-da!
[Evelyn sighs]
Why, why did you lie to me?
Why'd you say you
still had your house?
Well, if you thought
I still had my house,
then for a moment there it was
as if I still had my house.
Yeah, makes sense.
Not really.
It just got too much to keep up.
I spent a fortune on
plumbing, the roof.
I didn't have the money anymore.
I love these chairs.
Aren't they good?
But didn't you get
a great pension
from the orchestra?
Well, I have a modest pension.
Enough to pay for this place.
I'm in the independent
living section,
so I come and go as I want.
Right, for rehearsals
and concerts and--
Oh, yeah. [chuckles]
Sorry.
Arthritis, tendonitis, bursitis.
My ankles are in
good shape, though.
I still teach from time to time.
I do a masterclass occasionally.
One of my old students
teaches nearby.
She has me come in,
critique the sawing.
-[Claire] Mmm.
-She throws me a few bucks.
And the meals are included here.
I like eating cardboard,
so it's worked out for me.
[Evelyn chuckles]
I can invite a guest.
Wanna come to dinner?
Well, you make it
sound so appetizing.
[Evelyn chuckles]
No, but Ralph
invited me to dinner.
-Damn, you work fast.
-Hmm.
Look!
Look at us! [gasps]
Look at us.
[soft horn and string music]
[Claire huffs]
[Claire sighs]
So...
you were married to Grandpa?
Yes, I was.
It is not polite to stare.
Well, you can't blame him.
That's true.
I'd stare.
This was before Grammy?
Of course it was before
Grammy, knucklehead.
-What do you think?
-Don't call him names.
Say you're sorry.
[grandkid] Sorry.
Now tell him something
nice about him.
You're good at Roblox.
Now you tell your brother
something nice about him.
You smell funny.
[Ralph and Claire laugh]
That wasn't nice.
Do another one.
Uh, you're fast.
[Ralph] Yes, he is.
-I am fast.
-Very fast.
It was a long, long time ago
when your grandfather
and I were together.
-Pre-historic times.
-[Claire laughs]
[grandkid] OK.
And how long are
you in town for?
Just for the weekend.
For the funeral.
This is so good.
You're a good cook, Ralph.
Mmm, well, I remembered
you were pescatarian.
Still am.
[grandkid] Can I be excused?
Me, too. I'm full.
What about dessert?
Can I take an ice cream
sandwich upstairs?
You finish that salmon.
I can't. I'm full.
OK, well, the garbage
can will finish it.
-That's me.
-Oh!
I eat anything they leave.
[Claire] Oh.
If you both take your
place into the kitchen,
wash them off, and then
put them in the dishwasher,
then you can take an ice
cream sandwich upstairs.
-[Ralph] There you go.
-[grandkid] Thank you.
Good kids.
Thank you.
They are a pain in the butt.
It's nice that your father
has you here with him.
-It certainly is.
-Yeah.
Well, it's good for us
because he's such a good cook.
Yeah.
I think I'm gonna
excuse myself, as well.
It's very nice to
meet you, Claire.
You too, Joie.
[upbeat jazzy music]
Um, care to have an
after dinner drink?
OK.
[dog barks distantly]
Claire, there's, uh,
there's something I've
always wanted to ask.
Oh, God.
What happened?
Now, don't get me wrong.
This is the best thing that
could have happened to me.
I've moved on with my life.
I met Zora.
I have kids. I have grandkids.
But I've always wondered.
[chuckles] So I'm gonna have
to sing for my supper, huh?
Oh, no, no, no.
You don't have to,
unless you would like to.
You know, it would be nice
after all of this time
to have one less
mystery in my life.
Did you meet someone?
Meet someone?
A man? Did you fall in
love with someone else?
Oh, no, no.
Well, that's a relief.
I guess.
I mean, I thought maybe
if I was to be honest,
I thought perhaps it
was the old story.
What old story?
That I'm black and you're white.
[chuckles] And I just
suddenly realized that?
[chuckles] Maybe your
father got to you.
Oh, Ralph.
I loved you.
I loved you, Ralph.
And then?
Something happened.
-Something happened?
-Yeah.
-Something bad?
-Yeah.
-And you couldn't tell me?
-I couldn't.
I couldn't. I couldn't.
It made me mute.
It made me deaf.
It made me...
it made me blind to you
and to everything
good in my life.
-[soft string music]
-[Claire crying]
Just couldn't...
Claire, Claire, Claire.
I, I...
-I don't understand this.
-[Claire] I know.
But I'm sorry.
[soft string music]
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I hurt you, Ralph.
[soft string music]
[Evelyn sighing]
[bright string music]
-[hands clapping]
-Oh!
Not funny.
[bright string music]
Walter.
-Walter?
-[Walter] Mmm?
[Evelyn] Walt.
-What? Who is it?
-[Evelyn] It's Evelyn.
You're not the nurse.
No, I'm Evelyn
from the lunchroom.
-Oh.
-Don't get up.
-I couldn't if I tried to.
-[Evelyn] Oh.
What are you doing at
this time of the night?
Do you have a gun?
Do you?
We're not allowed to
have a gun in here.
I imagine not. But do you?
Who told you I have a gun?
Your grandkid.
My grandson?
Well, maybe. Time will tell.
But let's not get into that.
Where is your gun?
You leave my gun alone.
[gasps] Here in this closet?
Don't open that closet.
If you do, I am
calling the nurse.
OK, all right, all right.
Relax, Walt.
Please, I would like to borrow
your gun, Walter.
What for?
There, there's these thugs.
They're threatening my friend.
She lives in a
rough neighborhood.
But if I showed them this gun,
just kinda waved
it around and said,
"Hey, you leave my friend alone,
your misogynist creep,"
then they'd leave her alone.
That sounds hare-brained.
I suppose, but it's
the God's honest truth.
Will you do this for me, Walter?
Will you be a hero
and loan me your gun?
OK.
If you do something for me.
Anything.
Well, almost anything.
I want... [inhales]
bacon.
Bacon? OK.
Should I bring your
some from the cafeteria?
No, no, no, no.
Their bacon is horrible.
It's that turkey bacon.
No, I don't like it.
-I want real bacon.
-Ah.
I want crispy bacon.
Four pieces. Woo.
If you do that for me, I'll
give you what you want.
Seems fair.
I'm gonna go.
But Walter.
[bed whirring]
This was not a dream.
Well, I hope not.
I want that bacon.
Goodnight.
-[Ralph] Claire?
-[soft jazz music]
I remember when you were
saving up to buy this.
-Ralph.
-[Ralph chuckles]
Oh, my God.
I wrote you about it,
but you said you
didn't want it anymore.
All that time studying, all
those hours in the dark room.
[Claire] Yeah.
I saved it just in case.
But then it got packed up
with a bunch of old stuff.
I wanted to be Dorothea Lange.
[Ralph chuckles]
Oh, Ralph. [chuckles]
[soft jazz music]
It's, um, it's,
it's getting late.
-I should go.
-Don't.
-What?
-Don't go.
Please.
Stay.
OK.
Oh, Ralph.
What if, what if
Joie catches us?
[Ralph chuckles]
[Ralph] Claire,
this is my house.
I can have someone
in my room if I like.
[Claire] Right.
May I kiss you?
Why not?
[soft acoustic guitar music]
[soft guitar and horn music]
[Ralph] Mmm.
[Claire] Oh.
Oh, Ralph.
Gotta catch my breath. [laughs]
I'm sorry.
It's, it's, it's been a while.
I appreciate the enthusiasm.
Oh.
One sec.
Ooh.
-Viagra?
-[Ralph laughs]
No, no, no. It's just my statin.
I take it every night after
dinner so I won't forget.
So...
where were we?
You brought me to your room
and you were putting
the moves on me.
[Ralph chuckles]
Are you fucking serious?
[jazzy romantic music]
[Claire chuckles]
Well, if we're gonna
do whatever it is
we're thinking of doing, um,
I'm gonna wanna ask you
to turn the lights off.
But first I want to plant myself
firmly and safely in the bed.
OK, I'm on board.
Lights out.
[jazzy romantic music]
[gasps] Ralph!
You have a condom? I don't
wanna get knocked up.
[Claire and Ralph laugh]
[birds chirping]
[soft gentle music]
[Ralph snoring]
[soft gentle music]
[music continues]
[phone ringing]
Hello?
-I'm in.
-[Claire] You're in what?
-I'm in on the Howard thing.
-[Claire] You are?
[Evelyn] Well, my other
murder canceled this week,
so I've got time.
Are you still in or have
you had second thoughts,
which way is the wind blowing?
I have not had second thoughts.
[laughing]
What difference does it make?
Here's the difference it makes,
I have a gun,
or I will as soon
as I get some bacon.
Some bacon?
You think you can get
ahold of some bacon?
Well, yeah, I think I can
get ahold of some bacon.
It's gotta be real
bacon, not veggie bacon,
not Turkey bacon.
Old fashioned bacon,
four slices cooked.
Get it.
Meet me here.
[dramatic music]
-[Joie] Good morning.
-Hi, good morning.
Oh, I hope I didn't wake you up.
Oh, I smelled the bacon.
-Sorry.
-For what?
He's a grown man.
Right.
You cooking us breakfast?
I smell bacon.
Why don't you go back to bed,
it's very early.
-You can have bacon later.
-OK.
Are you going to be
our new grandmother?
No, no, I'm not.
OK, that's good.
Just 'cause, you know,
our old granny...
I know.
I bet she was wonderful.
You a big fan of bacon?
Oh, big fan.
Can't start my day without it.
-I thought you were pescatarian.
-Yeah.
Except after sex?
Funny.
[gentle music]
Do you have a Ziploc bag?
[gentle music]
[gentle music continues]
-You got the stuff?
-Yeah.
Crispy?
Pretty crispy.
You didn't mention how
crispy it was supposed to be.
I'm just curious.
Follow me.
Walt.
Walt.
Oh, I'm not dreaming.
I told you it wasn't a dream.
This is my friend Claire.
Hello, Claire.
Now I'm dreaming,
two beautiful ladies in my room.
That's very kind
of you, thank you.
You brought it, I can smell it.
-I told you.
-Can I see it?
Bring it here please.
Please.
Well, where's your thing...
[whispers] the firearm?
It's in the closet, on the
top shelf to the right,
it's in a wooden
box for checkers.
Checkers, all right.
You can have the bacon.
-Ta-da.
-Oh, thank you.
My God, this is so wonderful.
Mm.
It's not too crispy?
-Nuh-uh, perfect.
-Oh, good.
[Evelyn] Where is the damn game.
God, you're an angel.
Hey, what did you
mean when you said
time will tell
about my grandson?
There is something
wrong with that boy.
No, nothing's wrong with
James, you're a lucky bastard.
I can see the checkers,
but I can't reach them.
-[knocking on door]
-Hi, Walt.
Hello there.
Oh, hi there.
This is Claire and
Evelyn my friend.
I've met Evelyn.
Sure, we've seen
each other around.
Oh.
Ooh, what's that you're eating?
Oh, it's bacon.
It's delicious.
You're not supposed
to eat that, Walt.
-Oh, come on.
-Ladies, I'm going to need
to catheterize
Mr. Mangopian,
so I do believe
the visit is over.
[dramatic music]
Hector, would you do me a favor.
There's a box up there,
a checkers box,
-can you reach it?
-Sure.
These ladies wanna borrow it.
It's heavy.
What's in here?
Oh, a gun.
[Hector laughing]
You crack me up, Walter.
Here you go.
Oh, thank you.
-Happy catheter.
-Thank you.
See you soon.
[dramatic music]
Walt, nuh-uh.
[dramatic music]
What is it?
Is it a toy?
It's a flare gun.
I used to have a flare
gun on my sailboat.
You had a sailboat?
Yeah, Annette and I
had a sailboat.
Who's Annette?
The woman I was married to.
Oh, well... good.
I'm glad you approve.
We met in 2006, married in 2009,
right before she died.
She wanted to get
married, I did it for her.
Well, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry she died,
I'm sorry I didn't meet her.
That's her in the photograph.
She was an amazing violinist.
Not just violin,
mandolin, guitar,
any stringed instrument
she could play.
[Claire] Oh, she's beautiful.
Claire, I wanted to show you
how this gun is loaded.
You open it, press this button,
this is the cartridge,
red side in.
Shut it, it's loaded.
But, you couldn't kill
anybody with that, could you?
Oh, yes, mostly yourself
if you're not careful.
You could burn a hole right
through someone with that.
Wow.
What made you decide to help me?
"Since I cannot prove a lover,
I am determined to
prove a villain."
Excuse me?
Richard The Third.
Shakespeare.
Only you, Evelyn.
I missed you.
-You had my number.
-You had my number.
So we're both lousy friends.
[phone ringing]
Who is it?
It's Ralph.
I slept with him last night.
-No kidding.
-[phone ringing]
Oh, that good, huh?
No, it was good,
it's just not what
I came here for.
[phone ringing]
It's ringing.
Howard, it's Claire.
Hello, Claire.
I wanna come over and see you.
-You do?
-Yes.
Tell him you feel bad.
Yeah, I feel bad, you know,
Howard, I wanna come over
and apologize in person.
Apologize for what,
threatening to kill me?
[Claire] Yeah, for that.
All right, well
apology accepted.
I just, I feel...
crazy, I've been
just crazy, Howard.
Just a... crazy woman.
It must be the stress.
I've been under a lot of stress,
you know, because
of the traveling.
[kid screaming]
Oh, Jesus, wow.
God.
I wanna make friends.
I wanna make friends.
I hate to...
I hate to think that
I came all this way,
and to have that be
the last time
that, you know, that I saw you.
And so I think I should
come over and apologize
before I go home.
And somehow I feel that
Joyce wouldn't want it
to end like this.
Well, look,
I'm going to the park
with Allie and the kids.
I suppose you could
meet us there.
Perfect.
Where?
[gentle music]
Should I load the gun now?
I wouldn't, you don't want it
going off in your
bag by accident.
So what I just take it out,
and load it right
there in front of him?
I guess.
Look, you don't have to
prove anything to me,
I already know you're loca.
No, you were right.
Oh, my God, there
are so many things
that I have not ever
followed through on.
My dad used to call me LL,
short for Little Loser.
How crummy.
I remember him in his
uniform at graduation.
So you'll keep Allie
and the kids occupied?
There they are.
[gentle music]
[dramatic music]
[dramatic music continues]
Oh, Christ, she's got
that awful dyke with her.
Dad, don't talk like that.
Well, it's unconscionable
what she said
at your mother's wake.
Anyway, it's not even a
bad word, is it, dyke?
It is when you say it,
so don't say it.
[dramatic music continues]
You know, I think I'll
go talk to Claire,
I refuse to speak to Evelyn.
Oh, God damn.
[dramatic music]
Hello, Howard.
A word of advice...
Hello, Claire,
I'm glad you called.
We're old friends,
I wouldn't want there to be
any bad blood between us.
Yes.
Shall we sit down and talk?
Yeah, just for a moment.
Hi, Evelyn.
Hi there.
Bet you didn't think
you'd be seeing me again.
It's a surprise.
I suppose I should...
what, apologize?
I've actually been
thinking about it a lot,
and I think maybe I should.
Guys, come here right now.
-[kids laughing]
-What's that little one's name?
Joyce.
Joyce, that's nice.
Are we gonna ride
the carousel or not?
Yeah, just go line
up by the gate.
[kids laughing]
When I said you were lying,
I knew you weren't lying.
I found some letters when I
went through my mom's stuff,
my dad couldn't do it,
he was a wreck,
so I went through my
mom's whole office,
and she kept some of the
letters you wrote her.
She did?
Love letters?
They were very...
frank and explicit.
Holy cow.
She kept the letters
all these years.
Hot dog.
I'm tickled.
We have an extra ticket,
do you wanna get on?
I'd love to.
Look, Claire...
I understand.
I understand guilt,
it's a horrible emotion.
It distorts everything.
-Guilt?
-Yes, I understand your guilt,
I felt it too for many years.
My guilt for what?
What happened.
Our transgression.
Don't worry, she never knew
about it, I never told her.
Even when I was getting sober,
when I was making amends
I didn't tell her.
No reason to, it would've
caused too much pain.
-You made amends?
-I did.
I called the people in my life,
the ones I'd felt
that I'd wronged.
It was very healing.
It changed me,
you know, the whole process.
Would you mind sitting with her?
With Joycie? Sure.
May I?
I get dizzy on the horses.
Yeah, me too.
You looking for tissue?
Oh, oh, oops, here,
you dropped this.
You know, I really better be
getting back to the grandkids,
I mean...
oh, God, the energy.
What's that?
What the heck, is that?
Is that a toy?
It's a flare gun.
What, for emergencies?
[dramatic music]
I want you to tell the truth.
I want you to say it.
I want you to say what happened.
What happened?
What happened?
We had sex.
Yeah, it may have
been a bit rough,
but we had sex
one drunken night.
Now I wish it had
never happened.
I never meant to betray Joyce,
and I'm sure you didn't
want to hurt your friend.
That wasn't sex.
All right, stop pointing,
now I'm not joking now.
Sit down.
Don't tell me what to do,
now I've had enough of this.
Sit down or I'm gonna shoot you.
You? Shoot me?
What, with a flare gun?
I'll burn a hole in you.
I'll do it.
Listen, you're delusional.
I don't know what you
think happened between us.
Yes, you do.
I think you're
suffering from dementia,
that's what I think.
I think you blame
me for what happened
in your own marriage to Ralph.
I think you gave him
a terrible time of it,
'cause I think you're
the kind of person,
you're one of those people
who are never satisfied.
One of those women who are
not built for happiness.
Stop lying.
-You want the truth?
-Stop lying.
-You want the truth?
-Yes.
I'll give you the fucking truth.
I'm shocked.
I am shocked by your
utter selfishness.
I just lost the love of my life,
she was everything,
everything to me!
I had my heart ripped out,
and you have the
nerve to come here,
to come here with your
fucking gun, and your...
[Howard groaning]
Howard.
Howard.
Howard.
Help!
Help!
Someone's had a heart attack!
[dramatic music]
Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up.
Do you think your sister
knows it's not a real horse?
[gentle music]
[Claire] Hello? Hello?
[flare gun firing]
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Did you save grandpa's life?
Mom said you saved
grandpa's life.
Yes...
apparently.
Oh, we don't know that,
he can still take a
turn for the worst.
You wanna know
something amusing?
Joyce kept my love letters.
-That's amusing.
-Isn't it?
Allie told me.
I mean, I'm tickled
after all those years.
I wonder if Allie
threw them all out.
So did your grandmother
ever talk about me,
about Evelyn?
Um, I don't know.
It's OK, I was just wondering.
He's doing OK.
Thank goodness you brought
that flare with you.
Why did you have that thing?
Oh, she always carries one.
You'd be surprised what
she fits into that bag.
Was it a heart attack?
No, they don't think
it was a heart attack.
They think it could have
been an anxiety attack,
possibly an ulcer.
They don't know.
They're keeping him
overnight to make sure.
So he's not gonna die?
Well, they're still
running tests,
but they think he's
out of danger now.
They say it's really
good that he came in,
he's been under a
tremendous amount of stress.
Well, stress is a killer.
A slow one, evidently.
Do you think I could see him?
Oh, I think he'd
like to see you,
but they just gave
him a sedative
so he might be sleeping.
-Yeah. What room?
-[Allie] 814.
Claire.
I'm starving.
I'm gonna run the kids down
for a snack and come back up.
Can I stay? I'm not hungry.
No, you can come down with us.
But I'm in the middle of a game,
I'm trying for a record.
Can you just keep an eye on him?
Sure.
And can you not mention
anything about...?
Anything zappy?
Sure, no sweat.
We'll be right back.
Come on, girls.
[dramatic music]
Oh, Christ, no.
Nurse.
Joyce was away visiting
her mother who was sick,
and she asked me
if I wouldn't mind
dropping food off for you.
She said that you couldn't be
relied on to feed yourself.
And she was worried about you.
She said you'd been
drinking a lot.
It was a mistake.
Whatever happened between us,
it was a mistake.
It was a mistake...
that you grabbed my breasts
so hard they hurt for a week?
That you put your
leg behind my leg,
and tripped me
down to the floor,
and then lay on top of me,
and pulled out your penis?
Put your hands on my throat,
and said if I screamed
you'd choke me?
Then you pressed my
face into the floor,
and you pulled up my skirt,
and you shoved it in me.
I would never force
myself on anyone,
I would never do that.
You wanted it.
You were always looking at me.
I would catch you staring.
You had troubles in
your own marriage,
you just don't remember.
Come on, it was 45 years ago.
It was 46 years ago.
[dramatic music]
What was that room number again?
814?
Don't talk to any strangers.
[dramatic music continues]
Oh, shit.
Oh, Claire, no, no.
[dramatic music]
Thank you.
Fuck you.
Claire, Claire.
How dare you?
How dare you stop me?
I couldn't let you,
I don't want you
to spend the rest
of your life in jail.
Maybe that's what I want!
Maybe I'd rather be in
jail knowing he's dead!
Maybe you want to go to jail,
maybe you still will,
attempted murder's a crime too.
Oh, he's not gonna say anything.
He knows it's true.
He knows it's true!
Don't you have a kid?
Grandkids?
A house?
[phone ringing]
It's Ralph.
I don't know what he wants.
Oh, you know what he wants.
You think I'm getting
any action nowadays?
All I have is a cello
I can't play anymore.
An option on a room
in assisted living
once I can't keep up my
room in independent living.
You know what you have?
You did what you want in life,
that's what you have.
[elevator beeping]
Get in.
Get in.
I'll take the bus.
[gentle music]
You told me the day
That you show me your face
We'd be in trouble
For a long time
Oh, God.
I can't wait
Too afraid
Of nothing
I can't wait
We hide from nothing
Nothing
And you
Decide you
And you lay and wish it out
You lay
I need you
To be afraid of nothing
Oh, did I wake you?
-What's wrong?
-Nothing's wrong,
I just wondered if you
might like a glass of vodka.
I don't drink.
How about a joint?
-No.
-A little heroin?
Some cocaine?
Sorry to interrupt.
I can't wait
Oh, you're so pretty.
Of nothing
Nothing
To be afraid of nothing
Claire.
He's doing OK, I'm picking
him up later this morning.
You still flying out today?
I am.
Good.
Well, it's really
nice to see you,
appreciate you coming.
Mom really loved you.
I loved her.
And your grandparents, I...
they were really good to me
and my husband, my ex-husband.
I'd never really seen that
before, you know, up close,
loving family.
Thank you for telling me that.
Here they are,
there's a lot of them.
Thank you.
Thanks.
[Allie] Bye.
Hey, Dottie, how are you?
Oh, hello, Evelyn.
I don't see you in
here that often.
Well, the cardboard
gets stuck in my teeth.
Would you care to join me?
Well, the last time we talked
you called me a narrow-minded
Philistine.
Oh, that's a compliment
coming from me.
I looked up the word Philistine,
it's not a compliment.
Geez.
Hi, are you visiting
your granddad again?
Here.
No, no, those were
meant for you.
No.
Hey, what's wrong?
James.
James.
Is this the lady?
Sweetheart, get in the
car with Butterscotch.
Is he OK with
that dog in there?
It's his dog.
Listen, we're here to visit
with his grandfather.
-I know that.
-We don't really come here
to have someone
play dress up with him.
I imagine not, but if James
wants to play dress up,
what's the harm in that?
Thank you for the
parenting advice.
-[Evelyn] You're welcome.
-Can we go?
[Claire] Evelyn.
Claire, what are you doing here?
I brought you something.
Come on, just get
in the car, James.
I wish I was your grandmother.
-Well, you're not.
-I wish I was,
I would make you
some damn cookies,
I'd buy you a sweater.
I'd tell you every day
just how perfect you are.
You'd be a terrific grandmother.
-Get in here.
-Never say never kid,
you'd look great in rhinestones.
Come on. Wait, Butterscotch,
Butterscotch.
-Butterscotch!
-No, no, no.
Claire.
Oh, my arm.
[groans]
[groans]
Hang on.
Hang on, sis.
So, how's your hip?
My hip's fine.
So it's just your arm?
Yes, it's just my arm
that seems broken.
I guess that's lucky.
I mean, for your hip.
Yeah.
Ooh, God, be careful.
-[car horn honking]
-Oh, my God.
That was a stop sign.
I can see that now.
How long has it been
since you had a license?
Eight years.
You should've let
that family drive us.
And get in the
car with that dog?
Actually, I really
could stand a latte.
No, the doctor said you
couldn't have caffeine.
We could get you a decaf.
Oh, I'll be damned
if I drink decaf.
I mean, it defeats the purpose.
Well, you're gonna
have to get used to it,
'cause that's all I'm
gonna have in the house.
I hope you're not gonna
be ordering me around
all the time in Philadelphia,
because if you are I
don't think I'm moving in.
Damn...
So what did you bring me?
The letters.
Your love letters to Joyce.
-They weren't thrown away.
-Really?
Yeah, I went to the house
and I got 'em from Allie.
Claire, you did that for me?
Hmm, I thought you'd want them.
That was very thoughtful of you.
It occurs to me I could
have had the Biltmore Arms
call you an ambulance.
Oh, that was the
emergency entrance.
Were we allowed to use that?
I mean, is this an emergency?
I guess not to you.
Shall I turn back?
[car horn honking]
I see you.
[car alarm beeps]
I'm gonna get a latte,
your mom would want me to.
Look, I won't be long,
there's a cafe in the lobby,
and it won't be a goddamn decaf.
Dad.
Where the hell do I park?
There's a place up ahead.
It's right around the corner.
Watch out!
Whoa.
What the fuck?
Oh, my God, it's him.
Oh, my God, you!
You nearly killed me,
you fucking insane whores!
God.
[car tires squealing]
-[Evelyn] Oh, my God.
-Shit.
Shit.
I didn't see him.
Just jumped out.
Oh, he's dead.
Oh, my God.
Fucking shit!
Evie, he's dead.
[gentle music]
Ouch.
I'm sorry.
[Evelyn and Claire laughing]
What the fuck?
[gentle music]
Aren't you glad I didn't
let you smother him?
Yes.
[Ralph] Hi, ladies.
Hello again.
What a tragedy,
one right after the other.
Yeah.
But I guess they're both
in a better place now.
Not sure about both of them.
Claire, I brought your camera.
I went out and got film
for it and loaded it.
Ralph, that is extremely sweet.
Thank you.
Yeah, talk about full service.
Would you take a picture of us?
Uh... Here?
Yeah, please.
Well, yes, of course.
I'm not very good
with the camera.
Well, I'll focus it for you.
Evie, stand here, stand here.
[Evelyn] OK.
Yeah.
OK, right here, there you go.
OK.
Be sure you get the grave
in the background.
OK.
-Cheese.
-Cheese.
Got it.
That is not appropriate.
Oh, you're so nice.
Thank you.
OK.
Well, I'm gonna let
you two catch up,
or whatever it is you get up to.
Ralph.
Goodbye, Claire.
Claire, would you maybe
like to go to lunch?
Nothing romantic at all,
just lunch.
Why nothing romantic?
What if I wanted
to get romantic?
Is that an issue?
Not with me.
[laughs]
OK.
But I have to give
you a rain check,
I'm gonna have lunch
with my friend.
Oh...
Oh, I like that.
Evie, wait up.
[gentle music]
Sister don't mind
that I'm not on time
She knows that I'm
through with that
I'm like mine
[Claire] Wanna grab some lunch?
[Evelyn] Sure, how
about a bacon sandwich?
[Claire laughing]
Call me your side
And I will now be
And I will be fine
with that
You don't leave me now
You might love me back
Distance is fine
I know you can't care
And nothing is
big like that
You don't see me now
I don't see you back
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
One day I'll be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
You don't leave me now
Do you love me back
Just to remind you
I'm a mistake
How come you
don't want to know
You don't wanna see
You don't wanna show
Kicking myself
I know that you're tough
Yeah we can
pretend we're that
Gotta see how
you gotta leave that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
You don't leave me now
Do you love me back
Snow is outside
But I'm by your fire
I feel all the
love you bring
You gotta see how
we can see the sound
Summer in mind
And spring by your side
We'll see all the
love you'll keep
Gotta see that
we can't be that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be fine
with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be fine
with that
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
[music ends]
[amusing string music]
I'm gonna miss you.
I wish I didn't have to go.
I love you so much.
Now, you're gonna take your
pills, sweetheart, huh?
All right, don't
just chew 'em up,
and spit 'em out.
[chuckles]
I can't believe you're
traveling, Mom. [sighs]
I know how much you hate to fly.
Yeah, I, I do, but some
things are important.
Thank you for letting
me leave him with you.
Of course. He's a cutie.
Hey, kids, come
say hi to Grandma!
[kid] I'm on the phone!
So, um, the yellow
pills are twice a day,
-and the blue ones once.
-I know.
Mom, you gave me
the list, remember?
Yeah, I know, but.
And these are his toys.
And he sleeps with Mr. Moose.
Hey, if you guys don't
come in here right now,
I'm gonna flush your
phones down the toilet!
I don't wanna see them.
Or, I mean, I, I'm,
I don't wanna disturb them.
I know they're busy.
And hey, don't you yell so much.
I don't want you
to stress him out.
-[daughter] Mom.
-He's already, he's freaked.
I don't think he's
stressed. He's fine.
[Tommy] Hi, Grandma.
[Claire] Oh, hi, Tommy.
So, who died?
Oh, an old, old friend.
Hey, maybe you'll play
with Dashel sometime.
Maybe.
OK, um...
Oh.
If anything should happen,
know that I love you, Dashel.
Yeah, Mommy loves you and
you're gonna be taken care of.
OK, Mom, stop
being so dramatic.
OK, flying is very safe.
You'll be back
before you know it.
Nothing is gonna happen.
[amusing mischievous music]
[mourners murmuring
indistinctly]
[Allie] Claire.
Allie.
[Allie] So glad you came.
Thanks for letting me know.
Of course.
Mom really missed you.
She really loved you.
-I loved her.
-[kids laughing]
Stop it. I can see you.
Three now.
I have three.
Can you believe it? Stop it.
Dad will be really
glad you came.
It'll mean a lot to him.
Yes.
She was a wonderful woman.
Wonderful.
I'm wearing high heels
in honor of Joyce.
-Oh.
-She had such great legs
and she always loved
to show them off.
She did. She had the best legs.
[chuckles]
Claire! Oh, you made it.
Oh, that would mean
so much to her.
This is Claire, one of
Joyce's oldest friends.
They were at college together.
Claire lives in Ohio now.
We're so sorry for your loss.
[Howard] Oh, bless you, darling.
Call us and come over
to dinner, Howard.
Thank you, I will.
[mourner] We love you.
-Oh, Claire.
-Howard. I'm gonna kill you.
Now that she's gone,
now that it can't hurt her,
I'm gonna kill you...
this weekend.
I'm gonna do it this weekend.
[amusing mischievous music]
Howard.
-Oh, dear Howard.
-[Howard] Oh, hi, hi, hi.
-Oh, you dear man.
-Yeah.
I'm so, so sorry.
You think you'd get used to it,
used to the idea of loss.
When you see it this
far over the horizon,
it's like that shot in
Lawrence of Arabia.
You know, the little speck
that gets closer and closer.
[mourner coughs]
I learned a lot.
I changed a lot.
I learned patience, humility.
-I learned to enjoy lattes.
-[mourners chuckling softly]
Some of you know that Joyce
just loved her afternoon lattes,
and she got me addicted
to them, as well.
Sometimes I think I
can still hear her say,
"Howie, go to the cafe
and get some lattes, will ya?"
[mourners laughing]
[Howard sighs]
I met Joyce in New York.
We were married seven
months after we met,
and I have no regrets.
None.
Darling, I just want you to know
from the bottom of my heart--
Is this the wrong entrance?
It said chapel on the door.
-Oh.
-Howard.
Did I interrupt your eulogy?
God, I'm sorry.
That's all right, Evelyn.
It's all right.
Please.
Everyone, this is Evelyn.
Evelyn was Joyce's college
roommate, believe it or not.
Why wouldn't they believe it?
[Howard] Well, it's
just an expression.
I was in the back
using the restroom.
-It's like a maze.
-Understood.
-A labyrinth.
-Yeah.
Nice photo.
A bit sanitized, maybe.
-What?
-Well, she looks pleasant,
but Joyce was never
just pleasant.
She was always sparkly.
Sparkly?
Evelyn, would you
mind taking a seat?
Would you mind, please?
I'm in the middle of
my eulogy to my wife.
My wife of 51 years
has just died!
I understand.
My friend has died,
my friend of 60 years.
How about that?
-Isn't that something?
-[Howard sighs]
Ah, well, go ahead.
You were saying something
about no regrets,
darling Joyce,
bottom of my heart.
Yes.
I was about to say that
I admired her courage
in fighting this awful disease.
La la la la
La la la la
La la la la
La la la la
La la la la la
Evelyn.
Evie.
It's, it's me. It's Claire.
Hi, Claire. I know it's you.
I haven't lost my marbles yet.
Or my eyesight.
Get in. Let me give you a ride.
Do you have a driver's license?
I do.
I took the test two months ago.
And you passed?
Did you bribe the instructor?
I didn't have to.
I'm an excellent driver!
I trust the bus more.
Oh, get in.
I need to talk to you.
About what?
What do you need to talk about?
-I--
-[horn honking]
-[driver] Come on, move it!
-God, hold your horses!
What kind of person honks
a horn in a graveyard?
-Jeez.
-Pass! There's room! Go!
-You jerk.
-[driver] Stupid!
Get in, Evie.
I, I need to talk to you.
I told him.
You told him what?
I told him I was gonna
kill him this weekend.
I'm gonna kill the bastard.
I could chat a little bit.
-[Claire coughs]
-You're not gonna kill anyone.
I am.
Oh, you've always had big ideas,
-but very little follow through.
-Not true.
Oh, what about the time
you were gonna go out
in the middle of the
night and paint a vagina
on that fraternity house?
I don't remember that.
You talked about it for weeks.
You were gonna do
it for homecoming.
No kidding. What happened?
Nothing. Nothing happened.
You never did it.
And what about the time
you were gonna become
a lounge singer?
Or drive down to Peru?
There's still time.
[Evelyn] Ah.
[chuckles]
Are you still playing?
Of course I'm still playing.
Without my cello, I'd be lost.
Completely lost.
-Well, good for you.
-Mmm.
I'm not with the
orchestra anymore.
I'm with a couple of ensembles.
One is devoted totally
to modern composers,
and the other is all Bach.
Do you still have that
cute, little house?
[Evelyn] Mmm-hmm.
Oh, that's wonderful, wonderful.
So I was wondering if,
if you could help me.
What? Murder him?
There's a little
thing called jail.
Nice place to visit, but you
wouldn't wanna live there.
And let's take a moment
to remember our beautiful,
kind, happy friend whose
funeral we attended today.
I've thought about her.
I prioritized her
happiness over mine,
over my, my sanity.
She never asked
you to do anything.
And I told you, I told
you to go to the police.
Yeah, you did.
They wouldn't have believed me.
-I mean, back then?
-[Evelyn] Hmm.
Why were you alone
in that house?
You knew your friend
was out of town.
[Evelyn] Hmm.
Why were you alone in
your best friend's house
with her husband?
Mmm, best friend?
I thought I was your
best friend at that time.
You were both my best friends.
I'm just yanking your chain.
Would've ruined her life
if I had told the police.
We'll never know.
Her life might have been better.
So...
what's the plan?
-I'm gonna shoot him.
-[Evelyn] Mmm.
I'm gonna buy a gun
and I'm
gonna take it to the wake.
-[Evelyn] Mmm-hmm.
-Do you wanna come with me?
Sure, Scarface. Sounds like fun.
[Evelyn chuckles]
[soft horn music]
Oh.
-Uh, hello.
-Hello.
-I'd like to buy a handgun.
-[Clerk] Mmm-hmm.
Something not too heavy, please.
And maybe a silencer.
Well, I can't sell
you a silencer.
You can't legally buy a
suppressor in California.
-Ah.
-You can wear earplugs.
Well, what kind of firearm
would you recommend for me?
I want something that's light.
[Clerk] Well, what are
you gonna use it for?
Tell him.
-Sport shooting, self-defense?
-Yeah, self-defense.
[Clerk] OK, well, how about
this little Davis Derringer?
Fits right in your
pocket or your pocketbook
-right next to your keys.
-Oh, it's cute.
Very.
22. caliber, two shots.
Nice back up piece.
-Wanna hold it?
-Oh, sure.
-It's used. Cost about $125.
-Light.
-How's the recoil?
-Recoil?
Not gonna lie.
It has a little kick.
Not much there to
absorb the shock.
Do you have arthritis
in your wrist and hands?
Oh, a little bit in
my, in my left wrist,
but I take medication.
Hips are my problem.
Mine, too. I got a hip
replacement last year.
Ah, how'd that go for you?
Pretty good, thanks.
I also recommend
this Beretta 92.
It looks heavier.
It has very little recoil.
Very smooth.
Feels like a Cadillac.
-[Evelyn] Mmm.
-[gun clicks]
I think the key here
is to use a load
that lessens the kick.
These nine millimeter
bullets are very lightweight.
Hollow point for maximum damage.
Oh, maximum damage sounds neat.
Yeah, I think I'll
take the smaller gun.
OK. I'll need your California
driver's license
or your Cal ID,
and you could take the
handgun safety test
right here in the store.
I don't have a
California license.
[Clerk] You don't have
a California license?
No, I live in Ohio.
Then I can't sell
you a gun, sorry.
Well, darn it, we tried.
So did you get that
out of your system?
The whole Dirty Harry/
Death Wish thing?
No, I didn't get it
out of my system. God.
I should have bought a gun
at home and brought it,
but couldn't have
got it on the plane.
Oh, Claire. It's been decades.
And not like a
couple of decades,
it's been four and
a half decades.
It was yesterday.
Yeah.
Oh, I remember the
necklace Joyce was wearing
in the photo at
the funeral home.
I gave her that necklace.
-I had one, too.
-Do you have any poison?
I have a cyanide pill in case
I'm captured by the enemy.
You can have it.
I'm just gonna have to
stab him in the stomach.
[Evelyn laughs incredulously]
-Are you going to the wake?
-No.
I'll read about it in
the newspaper tomorrow.
I have a rehearsal.
You hate him, too.
I don't hate anybody.
It's too exhausting.
Well, let, let me give you
a, a ride to your house.
I think I'd rather take the bus.
Evie.
Evie?
You're the only
person I ever told.
Jesus, really?
Well, except for the therapist.
I had a therapist after
my second divorce.
Clearly it's done
wonders for you.
Evie, come with me.
[Evelyn] Bye, Claire.
[soft organ music]
Follow me until you
don't know where you are
Follow me until you
don't know where you are
Closing your eyes when
you're reaching with his
Falling down flat when
you don't understand
[aide] N23.
Who I am
[Evelyn] Hey, Ernie.
You ain't nothin'
you never won
[Evelyn] How's it hangin', Phil?
You don't do nothin'
I don't do
You shadow
You ain't nothin'
you never won
You ain't nothin'
you've ever done
You don't do
nothin' I don't do
You shadow
[Evelyn sighs]
[strings plucking softly]
[somber violin music]
[violin music stops]
Oh.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
-Oh, God damn it!
-[bow snaps]
[knuckles rapping]
Yes?
[bow clatters]
Yes.
Coming.
Oh.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Remember me?
Of course I remember you.
Are you visiting
your grandpa again?
-My parents are over there.
-[Evelyn] Mmm.
-I wanted to come say hi.
-Well, thanks.
[James] Can I come in?
Sure, for a second.
Aren't your parents
gonna miss you?
They didn't miss me last time
that day we played checkers.
-[Evelyn sighs]
-Wanna play again?
You know, um, I can't right now.
How's your grandfather?
How's Walt?
He wants to teach me how to
throw a ball and shoot a gun.
Oh, does he have one?
He has a baseball.
But does he have a gun?
[James] Yeah.
He has a gun.
I think so.
He showed it to me.
He says he wants to teach me.
Huh.
Could we do that other
thing we did last time?
The fashion show?
Well, you did look
cool in those heels.
Ah, but I don't
have time right now.
-Oh.
-Wait, wait.
Come here. Come here.
Tell you what.
You can choose something
from this to keep.
Really?
Why not? Who else am
I gonna leave them to?
[James giggles]
Oh, except you can't have
this one or this one,
and this one I got in
Seoul when I traveled
all over with the orchestra.
Can I have this?
Your ears aren't
pierced, are they? [tuts]
No.
Not those, but how about these?
These are clip on.
See, you open them like that
and you clip them,
pop 'em right onto
your earlobes.
They don't pinch, do they?
No, it's fine.
[Evelyn] Well, go
look at yourself.
Wow.
They're beautiful.
You're a beautiful kid. [sighs]
-Oh.
-[soft string music]
Better get back to your parents.
[James giggles]
Hey. Hey.
[soft string music]
Ah, Joyce.
Ah, to hell with all this.
[Western showdown music]
[child screaming]
[child laughing]
[waiter] May I take your coat?
[mourners chatting indistinctly]
[Howard] Yes, so.
Where's the kitchen?
Kitchen or the bathroom?
-Kitchen.
-Right in there.
It's pretty busy
in there right now.
Good.
[caterer] Waiter, over here.
Oh. You looking
for the bathroom?
No.
Nope, that's not
the right order.
I want tomato, olive, cheese.
Tomato, olive, cheese.
Can I help you, ma'am?
No, thanks.
No, wait! What are you doing?
Those go back in there
for another five minutes.
[amusing mischievous music]
-I just love chocolate.
-I know.
Oh, great. Is that for me?
Thanks.
Claire, have you ever met Wendy?
Wendy brought us this
beautiful batch of brownies.
Isn't that wonderful?
The least I could do.
Your mom was so wonderful.
-[Allie] Thank you.
-I was her art teacher.
She was a very talented painter.
Was she?
-[Wendy] Oh, yes.
-Thank you.
Would you do me a favor and
run that back to the kitchen?
Guys, no more sugar.
[kid] One?
[Allie] No, you're
gonna go crazy. No.
[disquieting string music]
[Claire breathes heavily]
-[disquieting string music]
-[voices echoing indistinctly]
Claire?
Claire?
It's me, Ralph.
Ralph.
What are you doing here?
Oh, Howard just
called me out of the blue
and invited me to the memorial.
I wasn't busy, so I came.
When did he call you?
A few hours ago.
I hope you don't
mind that I'm here.
I was very fond of Joyce.
You two were great friends.
And he told me
that you were here.
You look nice, Ralph.
[Ralph] Thank you.
I'm glad you're still alive.
[Ralph laughs]
Me, too.
It's good to see you.
Why are you carrying that knife?
Oh, I was gonna stab someone.
[Ralph laughs] Come on.
[Ralph and Claire laugh]
Crab cakes?
Would you take this to the
kitchen for me? Thank you.
Is that a no on the crab cakes?
That's a no, yes. Thank you.
[glasses clink]
So, how are you?
How's your husband?
We were divorced 15 years ago.
[Ralph] Oh, I'm, I'm sorry.
How's your wife?
She passed about four years ago.
Oh, I'm sorry.
But she lived a good,
full life
and I loved her deeply.
Well, that's good.
I have no idea why I said that.
I mean, it just
goes without saying.
I guess, guess I'm
a little nervous.
Why?
Well, it isn't very
often that you--
Not very often that you
run into your ex-wife?
Not very often.
Any kids?
I have one kid, two grandkids.
Great-grands?
-They're not that great.
-[Ralph chuckles]
No, I have no great-grandkids.
-I have a corgi.
-Mmm.
Pictures?
Of course.
How could I not, right?
-[Ralph] Of course.
-It's what we do these days.
[Ralph chuckles]
Let me see here.
[Claire] Come on, Dashel.
Come on.
Give me a smile.
-Heel. Oh, good boy.
-[Ralph laughs]
[Claire] He's cute, huh?
[Ralph] Ah, dogs always
loved you, Claire.
Yeah, you?
Oh.
-Lovely.
-[Ralph chuckles]
Lovely.
[Ralph clears throat]
It's really nice to see you.
I hope I didn't scare you.
Oh, come on.
You're as beautiful as ever.
[chuckles] And you're
as kind as ever.
Look at you two lovebirds.
-Or love pterodactyls, maybe.
-[Ralph chuckles]
Evelyn.
-Hi, Ralph.
-[Claire] You came.
I didn't miss the
carnage, did I?
[Allie] Excuse me.
Quite down, everybody.
Please gather 'round. Thank you.
I think someone is
about to give a speech.
Oh, good.
Perfect timing.
And I know my mother,
my mother would be so
happy to see you all here.
She'd really appreciate
it. I know Dad and I do.
So please eat, drink,
and raise a toast to my mom,
the best mom in the world.
-[group] To Joyce.
-[mourner] Yes.
[glass clinking]
I have a few words to say.
Please.
This is Evelyn, one of my
mother's oldest friends.
Joyce was a wonderful woman.
She certainly was.
A great cook,
a devoted wife and mother,
a dotting grandmother.
-[mourner] Oh.
-[mourner] Mmm-hmm.
And for junior and
senior years in college
and then six months
in New York City,
after graduation she was
my roommate and my lover.
-[mourner gasps]
-[mourner] Oh.
Jesus, what?
And this was a gay until
graduation type of thing.
This was who she was,
but not who she wanted to be.
[Howard laughs heartily]
God!
I'm sorry, Howard.
What's so funny?
You are, Evelyn.
You've always had such
a great sense of humor.
Not really.
People think I'm being funny,
but I'm really just talking.
It's very inappropriate,
Evelyn, and untrue.
And not something my
children needed to hear.
Oh, was it?
Did you even understand
what I was saying, honey?
You said you love Grandma.
That's right.
That's exactly what I said.
Adorable grandkids.
She got that in the
transaction, I guess.
She told me.
She told me that
you were delusional.
That you were
infatuated with her.
I mean, we used
to laugh about it.
She thought you were funny,
I can tell you that.
She told me you were cruel.
My father is one of the
kindest people I know.
Oh, is he?
[Allie] I think you
should leave now.
I tend to agree.
Howard, you didn't deserve her.
Can anyone give me a ride?
So what did you
think of my big news?
I knew.
The two of you always
staring at each other,
mooning over each other.
So why didn't you say something?
Well, why didn't you?
Joyce didn't want to.
Guess I didn't
either at the time.
It was a different time.
No, you have always
underestimated me.
Here, pullover. Here
at the bus stop.
What gives?
I can drive you home.
What are you afraid of?
[subdued horn and string music]
[aide speaking indistinctly
over loudspeaker]
Hey.
[subdued horn and string music]
Ta-da!
[Evelyn sighs]
Why, why did you lie to me?
Why'd you say you
still had your house?
Well, if you thought
I still had my house,
then for a moment there it was
as if I still had my house.
Yeah, makes sense.
Not really.
It just got too much to keep up.
I spent a fortune on
plumbing, the roof.
I didn't have the money anymore.
I love these chairs.
Aren't they good?
But didn't you get
a great pension
from the orchestra?
Well, I have a modest pension.
Enough to pay for this place.
I'm in the independent
living section,
so I come and go as I want.
Right, for rehearsals
and concerts and--
Oh, yeah. [chuckles]
Sorry.
Arthritis, tendonitis, bursitis.
My ankles are in
good shape, though.
I still teach from time to time.
I do a masterclass occasionally.
One of my old students
teaches nearby.
She has me come in,
critique the sawing.
-[Claire] Mmm.
-She throws me a few bucks.
And the meals are included here.
I like eating cardboard,
so it's worked out for me.
[Evelyn chuckles]
I can invite a guest.
Wanna come to dinner?
Well, you make it
sound so appetizing.
[Evelyn chuckles]
No, but Ralph
invited me to dinner.
-Damn, you work fast.
-Hmm.
Look!
Look at us! [gasps]
Look at us.
[soft horn and string music]
[Claire huffs]
[Claire sighs]
So...
you were married to Grandpa?
Yes, I was.
It is not polite to stare.
Well, you can't blame him.
That's true.
I'd stare.
This was before Grammy?
Of course it was before
Grammy, knucklehead.
-What do you think?
-Don't call him names.
Say you're sorry.
[grandkid] Sorry.
Now tell him something
nice about him.
You're good at Roblox.
Now you tell your brother
something nice about him.
You smell funny.
[Ralph and Claire laugh]
That wasn't nice.
Do another one.
Uh, you're fast.
[Ralph] Yes, he is.
-I am fast.
-Very fast.
It was a long, long time ago
when your grandfather
and I were together.
-Pre-historic times.
-[Claire laughs]
[grandkid] OK.
And how long are
you in town for?
Just for the weekend.
For the funeral.
This is so good.
You're a good cook, Ralph.
Mmm, well, I remembered
you were pescatarian.
Still am.
[grandkid] Can I be excused?
Me, too. I'm full.
What about dessert?
Can I take an ice cream
sandwich upstairs?
You finish that salmon.
I can't. I'm full.
OK, well, the garbage
can will finish it.
-That's me.
-Oh!
I eat anything they leave.
[Claire] Oh.
If you both take your
place into the kitchen,
wash them off, and then
put them in the dishwasher,
then you can take an ice
cream sandwich upstairs.
-[Ralph] There you go.
-[grandkid] Thank you.
Good kids.
Thank you.
They are a pain in the butt.
It's nice that your father
has you here with him.
-It certainly is.
-Yeah.
Well, it's good for us
because he's such a good cook.
Yeah.
I think I'm gonna
excuse myself, as well.
It's very nice to
meet you, Claire.
You too, Joie.
[upbeat jazzy music]
Um, care to have an
after dinner drink?
OK.
[dog barks distantly]
Claire, there's, uh,
there's something I've
always wanted to ask.
Oh, God.
What happened?
Now, don't get me wrong.
This is the best thing that
could have happened to me.
I've moved on with my life.
I met Zora.
I have kids. I have grandkids.
But I've always wondered.
[chuckles] So I'm gonna have
to sing for my supper, huh?
Oh, no, no, no.
You don't have to,
unless you would like to.
You know, it would be nice
after all of this time
to have one less
mystery in my life.
Did you meet someone?
Meet someone?
A man? Did you fall in
love with someone else?
Oh, no, no.
Well, that's a relief.
I guess.
I mean, I thought maybe
if I was to be honest,
I thought perhaps it
was the old story.
What old story?
That I'm black and you're white.
[chuckles] And I just
suddenly realized that?
[chuckles] Maybe your
father got to you.
Oh, Ralph.
I loved you.
I loved you, Ralph.
And then?
Something happened.
-Something happened?
-Yeah.
-Something bad?
-Yeah.
-And you couldn't tell me?
-I couldn't.
I couldn't. I couldn't.
It made me mute.
It made me deaf.
It made me...
it made me blind to you
and to everything
good in my life.
-[soft string music]
-[Claire crying]
Just couldn't...
Claire, Claire, Claire.
I, I...
-I don't understand this.
-[Claire] I know.
But I'm sorry.
[soft string music]
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I hurt you, Ralph.
[soft string music]
[Evelyn sighing]
[bright string music]
-[hands clapping]
-Oh!
Not funny.
[bright string music]
Walter.
-Walter?
-[Walter] Mmm?
[Evelyn] Walt.
-What? Who is it?
-[Evelyn] It's Evelyn.
You're not the nurse.
No, I'm Evelyn
from the lunchroom.
-Oh.
-Don't get up.
-I couldn't if I tried to.
-[Evelyn] Oh.
What are you doing at
this time of the night?
Do you have a gun?
Do you?
We're not allowed to
have a gun in here.
I imagine not. But do you?
Who told you I have a gun?
Your grandkid.
My grandson?
Well, maybe. Time will tell.
But let's not get into that.
Where is your gun?
You leave my gun alone.
[gasps] Here in this closet?
Don't open that closet.
If you do, I am
calling the nurse.
OK, all right, all right.
Relax, Walt.
Please, I would like to borrow
your gun, Walter.
What for?
There, there's these thugs.
They're threatening my friend.
She lives in a
rough neighborhood.
But if I showed them this gun,
just kinda waved
it around and said,
"Hey, you leave my friend alone,
your misogynist creep,"
then they'd leave her alone.
That sounds hare-brained.
I suppose, but it's
the God's honest truth.
Will you do this for me, Walter?
Will you be a hero
and loan me your gun?
OK.
If you do something for me.
Anything.
Well, almost anything.
I want... [inhales]
bacon.
Bacon? OK.
Should I bring your
some from the cafeteria?
No, no, no, no.
Their bacon is horrible.
It's that turkey bacon.
No, I don't like it.
-I want real bacon.
-Ah.
I want crispy bacon.
Four pieces. Woo.
If you do that for me, I'll
give you what you want.
Seems fair.
I'm gonna go.
But Walter.
[bed whirring]
This was not a dream.
Well, I hope not.
I want that bacon.
Goodnight.
-[Ralph] Claire?
-[soft jazz music]
I remember when you were
saving up to buy this.
-Ralph.
-[Ralph chuckles]
Oh, my God.
I wrote you about it,
but you said you
didn't want it anymore.
All that time studying, all
those hours in the dark room.
[Claire] Yeah.
I saved it just in case.
But then it got packed up
with a bunch of old stuff.
I wanted to be Dorothea Lange.
[Ralph chuckles]
Oh, Ralph. [chuckles]
[soft jazz music]
It's, um, it's,
it's getting late.
-I should go.
-Don't.
-What?
-Don't go.
Please.
Stay.
OK.
Oh, Ralph.
What if, what if
Joie catches us?
[Ralph chuckles]
[Ralph] Claire,
this is my house.
I can have someone
in my room if I like.
[Claire] Right.
May I kiss you?
Why not?
[soft acoustic guitar music]
[soft guitar and horn music]
[Ralph] Mmm.
[Claire] Oh.
Oh, Ralph.
Gotta catch my breath. [laughs]
I'm sorry.
It's, it's, it's been a while.
I appreciate the enthusiasm.
Oh.
One sec.
Ooh.
-Viagra?
-[Ralph laughs]
No, no, no. It's just my statin.
I take it every night after
dinner so I won't forget.
So...
where were we?
You brought me to your room
and you were putting
the moves on me.
[Ralph chuckles]
Are you fucking serious?
[jazzy romantic music]
[Claire chuckles]
Well, if we're gonna
do whatever it is
we're thinking of doing, um,
I'm gonna wanna ask you
to turn the lights off.
But first I want to plant myself
firmly and safely in the bed.
OK, I'm on board.
Lights out.
[jazzy romantic music]
[gasps] Ralph!
You have a condom? I don't
wanna get knocked up.
[Claire and Ralph laugh]
[birds chirping]
[soft gentle music]
[Ralph snoring]
[soft gentle music]
[music continues]
[phone ringing]
Hello?
-I'm in.
-[Claire] You're in what?
-I'm in on the Howard thing.
-[Claire] You are?
[Evelyn] Well, my other
murder canceled this week,
so I've got time.
Are you still in or have
you had second thoughts,
which way is the wind blowing?
I have not had second thoughts.
[laughing]
What difference does it make?
Here's the difference it makes,
I have a gun,
or I will as soon
as I get some bacon.
Some bacon?
You think you can get
ahold of some bacon?
Well, yeah, I think I can
get ahold of some bacon.
It's gotta be real
bacon, not veggie bacon,
not Turkey bacon.
Old fashioned bacon,
four slices cooked.
Get it.
Meet me here.
[dramatic music]
-[Joie] Good morning.
-Hi, good morning.
Oh, I hope I didn't wake you up.
Oh, I smelled the bacon.
-Sorry.
-For what?
He's a grown man.
Right.
You cooking us breakfast?
I smell bacon.
Why don't you go back to bed,
it's very early.
-You can have bacon later.
-OK.
Are you going to be
our new grandmother?
No, no, I'm not.
OK, that's good.
Just 'cause, you know,
our old granny...
I know.
I bet she was wonderful.
You a big fan of bacon?
Oh, big fan.
Can't start my day without it.
-I thought you were pescatarian.
-Yeah.
Except after sex?
Funny.
[gentle music]
Do you have a Ziploc bag?
[gentle music]
[gentle music continues]
-You got the stuff?
-Yeah.
Crispy?
Pretty crispy.
You didn't mention how
crispy it was supposed to be.
I'm just curious.
Follow me.
Walt.
Walt.
Oh, I'm not dreaming.
I told you it wasn't a dream.
This is my friend Claire.
Hello, Claire.
Now I'm dreaming,
two beautiful ladies in my room.
That's very kind
of you, thank you.
You brought it, I can smell it.
-I told you.
-Can I see it?
Bring it here please.
Please.
Well, where's your thing...
[whispers] the firearm?
It's in the closet, on the
top shelf to the right,
it's in a wooden
box for checkers.
Checkers, all right.
You can have the bacon.
-Ta-da.
-Oh, thank you.
My God, this is so wonderful.
Mm.
It's not too crispy?
-Nuh-uh, perfect.
-Oh, good.
[Evelyn] Where is the damn game.
God, you're an angel.
Hey, what did you
mean when you said
time will tell
about my grandson?
There is something
wrong with that boy.
No, nothing's wrong with
James, you're a lucky bastard.
I can see the checkers,
but I can't reach them.
-[knocking on door]
-Hi, Walt.
Hello there.
Oh, hi there.
This is Claire and
Evelyn my friend.
I've met Evelyn.
Sure, we've seen
each other around.
Oh.
Ooh, what's that you're eating?
Oh, it's bacon.
It's delicious.
You're not supposed
to eat that, Walt.
-Oh, come on.
-Ladies, I'm going to need
to catheterize
Mr. Mangopian,
so I do believe
the visit is over.
[dramatic music]
Hector, would you do me a favor.
There's a box up there,
a checkers box,
-can you reach it?
-Sure.
These ladies wanna borrow it.
It's heavy.
What's in here?
Oh, a gun.
[Hector laughing]
You crack me up, Walter.
Here you go.
Oh, thank you.
-Happy catheter.
-Thank you.
See you soon.
[dramatic music]
Walt, nuh-uh.
[dramatic music]
What is it?
Is it a toy?
It's a flare gun.
I used to have a flare
gun on my sailboat.
You had a sailboat?
Yeah, Annette and I
had a sailboat.
Who's Annette?
The woman I was married to.
Oh, well... good.
I'm glad you approve.
We met in 2006, married in 2009,
right before she died.
She wanted to get
married, I did it for her.
Well, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry she died,
I'm sorry I didn't meet her.
That's her in the photograph.
She was an amazing violinist.
Not just violin,
mandolin, guitar,
any stringed instrument
she could play.
[Claire] Oh, she's beautiful.
Claire, I wanted to show you
how this gun is loaded.
You open it, press this button,
this is the cartridge,
red side in.
Shut it, it's loaded.
But, you couldn't kill
anybody with that, could you?
Oh, yes, mostly yourself
if you're not careful.
You could burn a hole right
through someone with that.
Wow.
What made you decide to help me?
"Since I cannot prove a lover,
I am determined to
prove a villain."
Excuse me?
Richard The Third.
Shakespeare.
Only you, Evelyn.
I missed you.
-You had my number.
-You had my number.
So we're both lousy friends.
[phone ringing]
Who is it?
It's Ralph.
I slept with him last night.
-No kidding.
-[phone ringing]
Oh, that good, huh?
No, it was good,
it's just not what
I came here for.
[phone ringing]
It's ringing.
Howard, it's Claire.
Hello, Claire.
I wanna come over and see you.
-You do?
-Yes.
Tell him you feel bad.
Yeah, I feel bad, you know,
Howard, I wanna come over
and apologize in person.
Apologize for what,
threatening to kill me?
[Claire] Yeah, for that.
All right, well
apology accepted.
I just, I feel...
crazy, I've been
just crazy, Howard.
Just a... crazy woman.
It must be the stress.
I've been under a lot of stress,
you know, because
of the traveling.
[kid screaming]
Oh, Jesus, wow.
God.
I wanna make friends.
I wanna make friends.
I hate to...
I hate to think that
I came all this way,
and to have that be
the last time
that, you know, that I saw you.
And so I think I should
come over and apologize
before I go home.
And somehow I feel that
Joyce wouldn't want it
to end like this.
Well, look,
I'm going to the park
with Allie and the kids.
I suppose you could
meet us there.
Perfect.
Where?
[gentle music]
Should I load the gun now?
I wouldn't, you don't want it
going off in your
bag by accident.
So what I just take it out,
and load it right
there in front of him?
I guess.
Look, you don't have to
prove anything to me,
I already know you're loca.
No, you were right.
Oh, my God, there
are so many things
that I have not ever
followed through on.
My dad used to call me LL,
short for Little Loser.
How crummy.
I remember him in his
uniform at graduation.
So you'll keep Allie
and the kids occupied?
There they are.
[gentle music]
[dramatic music]
[dramatic music continues]
Oh, Christ, she's got
that awful dyke with her.
Dad, don't talk like that.
Well, it's unconscionable
what she said
at your mother's wake.
Anyway, it's not even a
bad word, is it, dyke?
It is when you say it,
so don't say it.
[dramatic music continues]
You know, I think I'll
go talk to Claire,
I refuse to speak to Evelyn.
Oh, God damn.
[dramatic music]
Hello, Howard.
A word of advice...
Hello, Claire,
I'm glad you called.
We're old friends,
I wouldn't want there to be
any bad blood between us.
Yes.
Shall we sit down and talk?
Yeah, just for a moment.
Hi, Evelyn.
Hi there.
Bet you didn't think
you'd be seeing me again.
It's a surprise.
I suppose I should...
what, apologize?
I've actually been
thinking about it a lot,
and I think maybe I should.
Guys, come here right now.
-[kids laughing]
-What's that little one's name?
Joyce.
Joyce, that's nice.
Are we gonna ride
the carousel or not?
Yeah, just go line
up by the gate.
[kids laughing]
When I said you were lying,
I knew you weren't lying.
I found some letters when I
went through my mom's stuff,
my dad couldn't do it,
he was a wreck,
so I went through my
mom's whole office,
and she kept some of the
letters you wrote her.
She did?
Love letters?
They were very...
frank and explicit.
Holy cow.
She kept the letters
all these years.
Hot dog.
I'm tickled.
We have an extra ticket,
do you wanna get on?
I'd love to.
Look, Claire...
I understand.
I understand guilt,
it's a horrible emotion.
It distorts everything.
-Guilt?
-Yes, I understand your guilt,
I felt it too for many years.
My guilt for what?
What happened.
Our transgression.
Don't worry, she never knew
about it, I never told her.
Even when I was getting sober,
when I was making amends
I didn't tell her.
No reason to, it would've
caused too much pain.
-You made amends?
-I did.
I called the people in my life,
the ones I'd felt
that I'd wronged.
It was very healing.
It changed me,
you know, the whole process.
Would you mind sitting with her?
With Joycie? Sure.
May I?
I get dizzy on the horses.
Yeah, me too.
You looking for tissue?
Oh, oh, oops, here,
you dropped this.
You know, I really better be
getting back to the grandkids,
I mean...
oh, God, the energy.
What's that?
What the heck, is that?
Is that a toy?
It's a flare gun.
What, for emergencies?
[dramatic music]
I want you to tell the truth.
I want you to say it.
I want you to say what happened.
What happened?
What happened?
We had sex.
Yeah, it may have
been a bit rough,
but we had sex
one drunken night.
Now I wish it had
never happened.
I never meant to betray Joyce,
and I'm sure you didn't
want to hurt your friend.
That wasn't sex.
All right, stop pointing,
now I'm not joking now.
Sit down.
Don't tell me what to do,
now I've had enough of this.
Sit down or I'm gonna shoot you.
You? Shoot me?
What, with a flare gun?
I'll burn a hole in you.
I'll do it.
Listen, you're delusional.
I don't know what you
think happened between us.
Yes, you do.
I think you're
suffering from dementia,
that's what I think.
I think you blame
me for what happened
in your own marriage to Ralph.
I think you gave him
a terrible time of it,
'cause I think you're
the kind of person,
you're one of those people
who are never satisfied.
One of those women who are
not built for happiness.
Stop lying.
-You want the truth?
-Stop lying.
-You want the truth?
-Yes.
I'll give you the fucking truth.
I'm shocked.
I am shocked by your
utter selfishness.
I just lost the love of my life,
she was everything,
everything to me!
I had my heart ripped out,
and you have the
nerve to come here,
to come here with your
fucking gun, and your...
[Howard groaning]
Howard.
Howard.
Howard.
Help!
Help!
Someone's had a heart attack!
[dramatic music]
Giddy up, giddy up, giddy up.
Do you think your sister
knows it's not a real horse?
[gentle music]
[Claire] Hello? Hello?
[flare gun firing]
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Did you save grandpa's life?
Mom said you saved
grandpa's life.
Yes...
apparently.
Oh, we don't know that,
he can still take a
turn for the worst.
You wanna know
something amusing?
Joyce kept my love letters.
-That's amusing.
-Isn't it?
Allie told me.
I mean, I'm tickled
after all those years.
I wonder if Allie
threw them all out.
So did your grandmother
ever talk about me,
about Evelyn?
Um, I don't know.
It's OK, I was just wondering.
He's doing OK.
Thank goodness you brought
that flare with you.
Why did you have that thing?
Oh, she always carries one.
You'd be surprised what
she fits into that bag.
Was it a heart attack?
No, they don't think
it was a heart attack.
They think it could have
been an anxiety attack,
possibly an ulcer.
They don't know.
They're keeping him
overnight to make sure.
So he's not gonna die?
Well, they're still
running tests,
but they think he's
out of danger now.
They say it's really
good that he came in,
he's been under a
tremendous amount of stress.
Well, stress is a killer.
A slow one, evidently.
Do you think I could see him?
Oh, I think he'd
like to see you,
but they just gave
him a sedative
so he might be sleeping.
-Yeah. What room?
-[Allie] 814.
Claire.
I'm starving.
I'm gonna run the kids down
for a snack and come back up.
Can I stay? I'm not hungry.
No, you can come down with us.
But I'm in the middle of a game,
I'm trying for a record.
Can you just keep an eye on him?
Sure.
And can you not mention
anything about...?
Anything zappy?
Sure, no sweat.
We'll be right back.
Come on, girls.
[dramatic music]
Oh, Christ, no.
Nurse.
Joyce was away visiting
her mother who was sick,
and she asked me
if I wouldn't mind
dropping food off for you.
She said that you couldn't be
relied on to feed yourself.
And she was worried about you.
She said you'd been
drinking a lot.
It was a mistake.
Whatever happened between us,
it was a mistake.
It was a mistake...
that you grabbed my breasts
so hard they hurt for a week?
That you put your
leg behind my leg,
and tripped me
down to the floor,
and then lay on top of me,
and pulled out your penis?
Put your hands on my throat,
and said if I screamed
you'd choke me?
Then you pressed my
face into the floor,
and you pulled up my skirt,
and you shoved it in me.
I would never force
myself on anyone,
I would never do that.
You wanted it.
You were always looking at me.
I would catch you staring.
You had troubles in
your own marriage,
you just don't remember.
Come on, it was 45 years ago.
It was 46 years ago.
[dramatic music]
What was that room number again?
814?
Don't talk to any strangers.
[dramatic music continues]
Oh, shit.
Oh, Claire, no, no.
[dramatic music]
Thank you.
Fuck you.
Claire, Claire.
How dare you?
How dare you stop me?
I couldn't let you,
I don't want you
to spend the rest
of your life in jail.
Maybe that's what I want!
Maybe I'd rather be in
jail knowing he's dead!
Maybe you want to go to jail,
maybe you still will,
attempted murder's a crime too.
Oh, he's not gonna say anything.
He knows it's true.
He knows it's true!
Don't you have a kid?
Grandkids?
A house?
[phone ringing]
It's Ralph.
I don't know what he wants.
Oh, you know what he wants.
You think I'm getting
any action nowadays?
All I have is a cello
I can't play anymore.
An option on a room
in assisted living
once I can't keep up my
room in independent living.
You know what you have?
You did what you want in life,
that's what you have.
[elevator beeping]
Get in.
Get in.
I'll take the bus.
[gentle music]
You told me the day
That you show me your face
We'd be in trouble
For a long time
Oh, God.
I can't wait
Too afraid
Of nothing
I can't wait
We hide from nothing
Nothing
And you
Decide you
And you lay and wish it out
You lay
I need you
To be afraid of nothing
Oh, did I wake you?
-What's wrong?
-Nothing's wrong,
I just wondered if you
might like a glass of vodka.
I don't drink.
How about a joint?
-No.
-A little heroin?
Some cocaine?
Sorry to interrupt.
I can't wait
Oh, you're so pretty.
Of nothing
Nothing
To be afraid of nothing
Claire.
He's doing OK, I'm picking
him up later this morning.
You still flying out today?
I am.
Good.
Well, it's really
nice to see you,
appreciate you coming.
Mom really loved you.
I loved her.
And your grandparents, I...
they were really good to me
and my husband, my ex-husband.
I'd never really seen that
before, you know, up close,
loving family.
Thank you for telling me that.
Here they are,
there's a lot of them.
Thank you.
Thanks.
[Allie] Bye.
Hey, Dottie, how are you?
Oh, hello, Evelyn.
I don't see you in
here that often.
Well, the cardboard
gets stuck in my teeth.
Would you care to join me?
Well, the last time we talked
you called me a narrow-minded
Philistine.
Oh, that's a compliment
coming from me.
I looked up the word Philistine,
it's not a compliment.
Geez.
Hi, are you visiting
your granddad again?
Here.
No, no, those were
meant for you.
No.
Hey, what's wrong?
James.
James.
Is this the lady?
Sweetheart, get in the
car with Butterscotch.
Is he OK with
that dog in there?
It's his dog.
Listen, we're here to visit
with his grandfather.
-I know that.
-We don't really come here
to have someone
play dress up with him.
I imagine not, but if James
wants to play dress up,
what's the harm in that?
Thank you for the
parenting advice.
-[Evelyn] You're welcome.
-Can we go?
[Claire] Evelyn.
Claire, what are you doing here?
I brought you something.
Come on, just get
in the car, James.
I wish I was your grandmother.
-Well, you're not.
-I wish I was,
I would make you
some damn cookies,
I'd buy you a sweater.
I'd tell you every day
just how perfect you are.
You'd be a terrific grandmother.
-Get in here.
-Never say never kid,
you'd look great in rhinestones.
Come on. Wait, Butterscotch,
Butterscotch.
-Butterscotch!
-No, no, no.
Claire.
Oh, my arm.
[groans]
[groans]
Hang on.
Hang on, sis.
So, how's your hip?
My hip's fine.
So it's just your arm?
Yes, it's just my arm
that seems broken.
I guess that's lucky.
I mean, for your hip.
Yeah.
Ooh, God, be careful.
-[car horn honking]
-Oh, my God.
That was a stop sign.
I can see that now.
How long has it been
since you had a license?
Eight years.
You should've let
that family drive us.
And get in the
car with that dog?
Actually, I really
could stand a latte.
No, the doctor said you
couldn't have caffeine.
We could get you a decaf.
Oh, I'll be damned
if I drink decaf.
I mean, it defeats the purpose.
Well, you're gonna
have to get used to it,
'cause that's all I'm
gonna have in the house.
I hope you're not gonna
be ordering me around
all the time in Philadelphia,
because if you are I
don't think I'm moving in.
Damn...
So what did you bring me?
The letters.
Your love letters to Joyce.
-They weren't thrown away.
-Really?
Yeah, I went to the house
and I got 'em from Allie.
Claire, you did that for me?
Hmm, I thought you'd want them.
That was very thoughtful of you.
It occurs to me I could
have had the Biltmore Arms
call you an ambulance.
Oh, that was the
emergency entrance.
Were we allowed to use that?
I mean, is this an emergency?
I guess not to you.
Shall I turn back?
[car horn honking]
I see you.
[car alarm beeps]
I'm gonna get a latte,
your mom would want me to.
Look, I won't be long,
there's a cafe in the lobby,
and it won't be a goddamn decaf.
Dad.
Where the hell do I park?
There's a place up ahead.
It's right around the corner.
Watch out!
Whoa.
What the fuck?
Oh, my God, it's him.
Oh, my God, you!
You nearly killed me,
you fucking insane whores!
God.
[car tires squealing]
-[Evelyn] Oh, my God.
-Shit.
Shit.
I didn't see him.
Just jumped out.
Oh, he's dead.
Oh, my God.
Fucking shit!
Evie, he's dead.
[gentle music]
Ouch.
I'm sorry.
[Evelyn and Claire laughing]
What the fuck?
[gentle music]
Aren't you glad I didn't
let you smother him?
Yes.
[Ralph] Hi, ladies.
Hello again.
What a tragedy,
one right after the other.
Yeah.
But I guess they're both
in a better place now.
Not sure about both of them.
Claire, I brought your camera.
I went out and got film
for it and loaded it.
Ralph, that is extremely sweet.
Thank you.
Yeah, talk about full service.
Would you take a picture of us?
Uh... Here?
Yeah, please.
Well, yes, of course.
I'm not very good
with the camera.
Well, I'll focus it for you.
Evie, stand here, stand here.
[Evelyn] OK.
Yeah.
OK, right here, there you go.
OK.
Be sure you get the grave
in the background.
OK.
-Cheese.
-Cheese.
Got it.
That is not appropriate.
Oh, you're so nice.
Thank you.
OK.
Well, I'm gonna let
you two catch up,
or whatever it is you get up to.
Ralph.
Goodbye, Claire.
Claire, would you maybe
like to go to lunch?
Nothing romantic at all,
just lunch.
Why nothing romantic?
What if I wanted
to get romantic?
Is that an issue?
Not with me.
[laughs]
OK.
But I have to give
you a rain check,
I'm gonna have lunch
with my friend.
Oh...
Oh, I like that.
Evie, wait up.
[gentle music]
Sister don't mind
that I'm not on time
She knows that I'm
through with that
I'm like mine
[Claire] Wanna grab some lunch?
[Evelyn] Sure, how
about a bacon sandwich?
[Claire laughing]
Call me your side
And I will now be
And I will be fine
with that
You don't leave me now
You might love me back
Distance is fine
I know you can't care
And nothing is
big like that
You don't see me now
I don't see you back
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
One day I'll be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
You don't leave me now
Do you love me back
Just to remind you
I'm a mistake
How come you
don't want to know
You don't wanna see
You don't wanna show
Kicking myself
I know that you're tough
Yeah we can
pretend we're that
Gotta see how
you gotta leave that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
You don't leave me now
Do you love me back
Snow is outside
But I'm by your fire
I feel all the
love you bring
You gotta see how
we can see the sound
Summer in mind
And spring by your side
We'll see all the
love you'll keep
Gotta see that
we can't be that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be
fine with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be fine
with that
Ooh-ooh, oh
I'll never be fine
with that
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
You don't leave me now
do you love me back
[music ends]