NASCAR vs. Navy: The San Diego Mini Movie (2026) Movie Script
It's time to rise and grind, San Diego.
I'm Bert Rubber.
And I'm Angela Turnwell.
Today's top story is NASCAR.
That's right.
The weekend America has been waiting
for is finally here.
This Sunday, NASCAR will transform
Naval Base Coronado into
The Anduril 250, a fire-breathing
cathedral of speed.
Two American dynasties, years of
preparation, one single victor.
These patriotic powerhouses will turn
runway into race track, making
way for the 40 roaring Cup cars
in honor of America's 250th anniversary.
I'm not gonna lie, Angela, I'm
tingling all over.
Will rockstar Ryan Blaney
claim another Cup win?
Will defending champ Kyle Larson
solidify his name in San Diego?
Or will the rabid dogs of the
racing world,
Carson Hocevar and Noah Gragson,
have something to say about it?
What are your thoughts on
the big race, buddy?
Seeing the boys out there doing their
thing. Oh, you can't beat it.
Oh, it's gonna be nuts!
What's a message you wanna say
to your favorite drivers out there?
Drivers,
Start your engines!
NASCAR and the Navy.
Yeah, now that's beast mode.
This race is sure to deliver on
its promise of being a
history-making, record-breaking
thunderstorm of American horsepower.
Oh, yes, it will.
But the question on everybody's mind is
who will become the king of Coronado?
Whoo!
That's a serious ride you got there.
Likewise.
Stache.
Ryan Blaney.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Briscoe, C-Bell, Hurricane,
and the kid's Zilisch
Y'all the NASCAR guys?
Damn right!
And... Noah
What's up?
I'm Rizz.
A bit early, aren't you?
Yeah, we're here to scope out the track.
That so, little Red Bull?
I think you fellas hadn't quite figured
out where you're at yet.
This is my house.
And that's my runway.
Look, we have a race lined
up on Sunday.
I'm not really sure what the problem is.
You ain't turning my runway
into a race track.
I guarantee that.
Hey, tell G.I. Joe to chill.
Oh, shit.
What's that, blondie?
I said I'll be ripping up that runway
until it's unrecognizable.
You wanna play.
How about I peel the paint off that
pretty little truck of yours?
How about we strap in and settle it on
your little precious runway?
Why don't you take a lap?
Cool down.
Fine.
They think this is a playground.
This is sacred ground.
We'll treat it like that.
Things work a bit different on base.
Respect is something to be won.
Oh, we know winning.
Let's put them through the gauntlet.
The gauntlet?
Just a series of challenges that'll
make you wet your little jumpsuits.
This Navy shit's cake.
We'll smoke 'em.
Careful, son.
Wouldn't want to embarrass you
in front of your boys.
We can handle anything you throw at us.
Question is... can you?
I'm listening.
Your best guys against mine.
We'll play your little games.
We're going to throw a few of
our own in there, too.
See how you do when it's not your
little jets or your little helicopters.
You think we can't do what you do?
This is the US Navy, son.
Well alright then,
Winner takes the runway?
It's on.
Been here five minutes, and we're
already getting in trouble.
Hell yeah, we are.
All right, fellas. The gauntlet is six
challenges.
Three from you, three from us.
First one to four wins.
First up, we're going to give you
a precision challenge.
It's pretty easy.
Whoo-hoo!
Damn, she purrs like a banshee!
Get the car up to speed, and then
stop in front of this watermelon.
Did I do it?
What a loser.
You want me to try to show
you how it's done?
Show me the way, brother.
Atta boy, Chase!
I'll do this all day.
That's what I'm talking about.
Let's go, baby.
Come on, boy.
I think that's gonna be a chalk
on the board right there.
What do you guys think?
Ooh, yes.
Jets and helicopters rule the
skies, but the water?
The water is where the Navy dominates.
Save the civilian out in the bay before
our Navy SEAL does it for you.
Come on.
There's people out there drowning.
What are you doing?
Put the boots on.
That's the wrong booty.
Oh, my.
Get up, Carson.
Come on.
Go, go.
Carson, come on.
Carson, use that upper body strength
Let's go.
He doesn't have a lot.
Yeah, you didn't have to go there.
Where was my help?
How did I do?
Hurricane?
More like a light breeze.
Going fast is only half the race.
The other half is in the pit stop.
Let's see if your flight crew can get
it done in under 10 seconds.
See, Knuckles, this is very
complex, right?
There's five guys all working together,
kind of like a dance, very
synchronized dance that they're
all working together.
All got their specific job.
Sorry, were you saying something?
Let's go.
Let's go, bring it in.
Don't worry.
We're only down one.
One, two, three. Navy.
That was fast.
This next challenge should
feel pretty familiar.
We wanna see how fast you can get around
this so-called race track of yours.
It looks pretty sick to me.
Yeah, but what's the catch?
Damn it, Noah, dude save the tires, bro.
Hey, we're good. We're good.
I'm telling you, they're gonna
send someone after us.
Don't worry.
Unit 3
Please hold your position
on the south side.
How are you going to tell me that glazed
is better than strawberry?
Because it is.
Oh, shit.
There they are.
I think I got something for them.
Noah, don't do it, Noah.
Good morning, boys.
Yeeeoww
Dude, they're pissed.
We got it.
They're so pissed.
Oh, OK.
Open it up, Noah!
I'm trying.
Open it up!
Look at the delicate pastry.
I don't think you have much
optimism to you.
You're the one with the pink doughnut.
Damn!
Oh, my god!
I think they're coming.
We gotta go.
We cannot lose this.
I'm just dealing with them.
This course is sick.
Dude, this is a sick course.
We gotta go.
Grab a gear,
Let's go.
Come on, man.
Dude, we're almost there,
Right there.
Come on! Come on!
OK, we got it.
Show's over boys!
So, Knuckles, how do you like my driving?
Oh, my god, Noah.
Give it a rest.
To Sabrina Carpenter
at the Met Gala.
Yes.
Well, speaking of rumors, word on the
street is there's been some
unusual activity at the base since
those NASCAR drivers arrived.
Unusual how, Bert?
Well, a little birdie told me that the
Anduril 250 "Race the Base" weekend
hangs in the balance, after
the pilots and the drivers got
into some sort of unsanctioned showdown
to see who controls the runway.
And I'm sorry to say, Angela, it's not
looking good for your NASCAR boys.
As much as those drivers make me question
my marriage, Bert, these
are America's heroes we're talking about.
Maybe those NASCAR boys are better
off staying in their lane.
Ha, ha, yes.
Well, we'll be keeping
close tabs on who comes out
on top of that stars
and stripes sandwich.
This is bullshit.
We got to remember to bring SVG.
You started this whole thing, G.I. Joe?
It ain't over yet.
We're not losing that runway.
I'm bored.
Can we go back to the I-bar?
Look, tomorrow's the dogfight.
Who's flown with the Thunderbirds before?
Zilisch
All right, Connor. We
need you on this one, bud.
Dog fighting?
You got this.
You can do anything.
Except get in the I-Bar.
All right, man.
Or stand on the car at Watkins Glen.
Whoa.
Too soon, man.
At least I was in victory lane.
Hey, I'll give you some tips.
Hey, here's an idea.
How about anybody but Carson?
Hey, you scratched my visor. I'll
take that 'Vette off your hands.
Hey, man.
Give me some advice.
Keys are yours.
He's got more time on a saltwater head
than you got on one of these.
You don't stand a chance.
Save us some fuel.
Don't even go.
Great.
Okay, look.
He's top gun through and through.
He's gonna fight it the way they teach it.
Unless you do something biblical,
rip the wings off the jet.
All right, Connor, my boy,
welcome to dogfighting.
You're on weapons in the backseat. And
I'm guessing you haven't done this before.
I don't know, man.
I barely know what I'm looking
at back here.
Well you better figure it out
quick kid, because if you don't
you and your boys are done.
The bandit's going to
be out here hunting us.
You see anything out there?
Yeah... I see him.
Damn.
Alright look, I'll do all the work in the front seat and
get us behind him. Then it's up to you to take the shot.
You ready for this, Connor?
Uh...
Let's do this.
Here he comes up our right side.
Fight's on.
Now is your chance.
Take the shot.
Damn, missed him.
Shit, he'll be coming up behind us.
We gotta move.
That's not good.
Hold on.
Got you locked in now.
Hold on, kid.
Damn.
That was close.
He's turning back around.
What do you want to do, kid?
Got you now, nugget.
Connor, we gotta do something. Come on!
Unless you do something biblical,
rip the wings off the jet.
Come on, kid.
Alright.
We're gonna pull up and cut the engine.
Cut the engine?
Are you insane?
Just do it!
Nice knowing you kid.
Gotcha.
Pull!
Pull!
Now!
Drop the nose!
What the hell?
Falling in behind him, now's your chance.
Take the shot.
Come on.
Yes!
Holy shit.
That was badass.
Let's go buzz the tower.
Y'all sweating yet?
Bone dry.
Looking forward to playing a real sport?
Get ready to eat sand.
Stache here played in college,
so I hope you're ready to take
another beating.
You played in college?
Natty Champs, son.
Is that even a thing?
Hey, can we be skins?
Guys, I'm out.
I'm out!
Timeout, timeout, timeout.
Come on, guys.
Alright, let's go, let's go baby.
He really is the Natty champ.
Yeah, he is.
There's two of them, one of
me, and I can do it.
Six, seven, eight, all day long.
Double gun ball.
Ryan, Chase, we need a last lap pass.
You better do your fucking job.
Wait a minute.
You know, Chase, I think we gotta
go for the big one.
I think coach is right
Peek-a-boo?
Huh?
Coach is right on three.
One, two, three!
Coach is right!
Let's go, boys.
Let's go!
Yeah, Navy!
Come on, boys, let's go!
Come on, go!
Oh!
What are you doing?
Well it ain't over.
No way.
So, like, did you make all these?
So we're tied.
Now what?
No idea.
What do you think his tab's up to?
Noah, we're not bailing you out again.
Come sit down.
Bro, chill out.
I didn't even touch shit.
I'll be your wingman, buddy.
Ah, thanks dude.
Okay, I'm gonna call it a night, fellas.
Big thank you to Ryan for buying everyone
a round of cheer!
Well done, dude.
Hey, hat rule.
That's a classic.
Hey, you took one to the gut today.
Whoever threw that's got an
arm man. I'm still feeling the stang.
Hey, how about a little nectar
of the gods?
Hey, where's my drink, NASCAR?
You love to make a scene, don't you?
Sergeant Buzzkill, sir.
That's Lieutenant Buzzkill to you.
Come on, pay up.
I ain't got any money.
I'm not happy with what you pulled today.
It's dodgeball.
Relax.
Mm, it's a cheap shot.
Look, we got a full house tonight. Goober's
playing yacht rock, I'm gonna do a shoe beer.
Take a night off, my man.
Come on, have a beer.
Relax.
If he's staying, I'm out.
The best we don't associate
with your kind anyway.
My kind?
What's my kind?
I'll key your little puddle jumper.
Hey, now, those ain't prop planes.
You think we're missing
anything in there?
Nah.
Careless, reckless, no regard for order.
So just like he drives?
You all run your mouths an awful lot for
a bunch of kids playing
in some glorified go karts.
What did he just say?
Glorified go karts, huh?
I could smoke your ass in
a drag race any day.
Oh, shit.
That's a hell of a proposition.
Your car versus my jet?
See you in my rear view.
So I hear another rumor is,
Ryan Blaney said,
"Hey, let me take my car and race a jet."
Well, Ryan, I mean anything with
Ryan in it, please.
Yes, I know.
He's very handsome to you, Angela,
but he's racing a jet.
A literal jet, yes.
No, no, no.
You know the things that fly and have
fire coming out their tails?
Jets.
Super fast.
I don't like Blaney being put in
that much danger, Bert.
I do.
His face is too beautiful for that.
I think it's awesome.
You ready for this?
He's in a jet.
Hey, any tips?
Just don't turn left.
Oh, oh, we can confirm that a Cup car
and a jet are squaring
up for what looks like
So juicy.
Ooh, grit!
You are really in the thick of it.
I bet my first born's kidney
NASCAR wins this.
Let's go Ryan!
Hey, John, it's Stu from Mayhem's
Castle of the Gales.
Ow!
Whoa!
Oh, my God!
This is so good!
This is so cool!
We got it.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Ready?
My house!
My house!
Let's go!
Come on, let's go!
Woo!
Let's go!
Let's go, man!
Let's go!
Woooo!
It's my house!
Let's go!
This is my house!
This is my house!
Federally controlled airfield property.
I should feenab all of your asses.
What?
You been huffing jet fuel?
Is it killing your brain cells?
Or did you just come out of your
mama that damn stupid?
No, sir.
Shut up!
And you, you want to explain yourself?
Sir, I've embarrassed the cloth I wear,
the community, the name, the Navy
Shut up!
It's too bad.
Because you had a bright future.
All of you.
You will only be so lucky
If I don't have your asses riding the pine.
Sir, sir, sir.
What the hell do you want?
I gotta say something.
Son, this is Navy business
Yeah, but sir, they had nothing
to do with it.
I organized the drag race.
I pushed them to do it.
You know, that's cute.
You thinking that you can come in
here and tell me what to do.
You three, get the hell out of my office.
Listen to me, son.
We have been breaking our
damn backs for you
for the past two years to make
this race possible.
And that little stunt that
you just pulled out there
could have cost you the
whole damn thing.
Yeah.
Do you understand what I'm going to
have to do in order to keep you here?
Huh?
You know what?
Just get out of my office.
And while you're at it, you tell those
pilots in mind if they step
so much as one toe out of line, they
will be eating burnt rubber
for breakfast for the rest of
their miserable lives.
Yes, sir.
Good afternoon, sir.
So, who won?
The pilots, sir, but just by a hair.
It's going to be one hell of a race
Yes Sir.
I'm not here to say thank you.
Well, I'd throw up if you did.
Y'all have got some brass ones
going up against the U.S. Navy
It's been a hell of a week.
I'm sorry for being so tough on you,
but, err... you boys got something special.
You'll do well here.
Yeah, you wouldn't make a half
bad NASCAR driver either.
I guess he's Stache-ing a nine-car
pile-up for sure.
No, man, I just want to rip beers
and fly jets, you dorks.
Well, a bet's a bet, so
Nah.
You've suffered enough
Yeah, what you pulled back there?
That was badass, man.
Whatever you guys need, we're in.
We got you.
What do you mean?
We can race?
I mean, this week you've shown
that you deserve respect.
You've shown honor, courage,
and commitment.
Even you, Noah.
So, it's on then?
Yeah.
Strap in, boys!
We're back.
No way.
Yeah, let's go!
I'll be down in a minute.
Give me a minute.
We are back.
What's the name on the tab?
Noah Gragson, but
you can just call me Rizz.
Cash or card?
I do card
Holy shit.
You ready to Race the Base, brother?
I think the real question is,
is America ready?
I'm Bert Rubber.
And I'm Angela Turnwell.
Today's top story is NASCAR.
That's right.
The weekend America has been waiting
for is finally here.
This Sunday, NASCAR will transform
Naval Base Coronado into
The Anduril 250, a fire-breathing
cathedral of speed.
Two American dynasties, years of
preparation, one single victor.
These patriotic powerhouses will turn
runway into race track, making
way for the 40 roaring Cup cars
in honor of America's 250th anniversary.
I'm not gonna lie, Angela, I'm
tingling all over.
Will rockstar Ryan Blaney
claim another Cup win?
Will defending champ Kyle Larson
solidify his name in San Diego?
Or will the rabid dogs of the
racing world,
Carson Hocevar and Noah Gragson,
have something to say about it?
What are your thoughts on
the big race, buddy?
Seeing the boys out there doing their
thing. Oh, you can't beat it.
Oh, it's gonna be nuts!
What's a message you wanna say
to your favorite drivers out there?
Drivers,
Start your engines!
NASCAR and the Navy.
Yeah, now that's beast mode.
This race is sure to deliver on
its promise of being a
history-making, record-breaking
thunderstorm of American horsepower.
Oh, yes, it will.
But the question on everybody's mind is
who will become the king of Coronado?
Whoo!
That's a serious ride you got there.
Likewise.
Stache.
Ryan Blaney.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Briscoe, C-Bell, Hurricane,
and the kid's Zilisch
Y'all the NASCAR guys?
Damn right!
And... Noah
What's up?
I'm Rizz.
A bit early, aren't you?
Yeah, we're here to scope out the track.
That so, little Red Bull?
I think you fellas hadn't quite figured
out where you're at yet.
This is my house.
And that's my runway.
Look, we have a race lined
up on Sunday.
I'm not really sure what the problem is.
You ain't turning my runway
into a race track.
I guarantee that.
Hey, tell G.I. Joe to chill.
Oh, shit.
What's that, blondie?
I said I'll be ripping up that runway
until it's unrecognizable.
You wanna play.
How about I peel the paint off that
pretty little truck of yours?
How about we strap in and settle it on
your little precious runway?
Why don't you take a lap?
Cool down.
Fine.
They think this is a playground.
This is sacred ground.
We'll treat it like that.
Things work a bit different on base.
Respect is something to be won.
Oh, we know winning.
Let's put them through the gauntlet.
The gauntlet?
Just a series of challenges that'll
make you wet your little jumpsuits.
This Navy shit's cake.
We'll smoke 'em.
Careful, son.
Wouldn't want to embarrass you
in front of your boys.
We can handle anything you throw at us.
Question is... can you?
I'm listening.
Your best guys against mine.
We'll play your little games.
We're going to throw a few of
our own in there, too.
See how you do when it's not your
little jets or your little helicopters.
You think we can't do what you do?
This is the US Navy, son.
Well alright then,
Winner takes the runway?
It's on.
Been here five minutes, and we're
already getting in trouble.
Hell yeah, we are.
All right, fellas. The gauntlet is six
challenges.
Three from you, three from us.
First one to four wins.
First up, we're going to give you
a precision challenge.
It's pretty easy.
Whoo-hoo!
Damn, she purrs like a banshee!
Get the car up to speed, and then
stop in front of this watermelon.
Did I do it?
What a loser.
You want me to try to show
you how it's done?
Show me the way, brother.
Atta boy, Chase!
I'll do this all day.
That's what I'm talking about.
Let's go, baby.
Come on, boy.
I think that's gonna be a chalk
on the board right there.
What do you guys think?
Ooh, yes.
Jets and helicopters rule the
skies, but the water?
The water is where the Navy dominates.
Save the civilian out in the bay before
our Navy SEAL does it for you.
Come on.
There's people out there drowning.
What are you doing?
Put the boots on.
That's the wrong booty.
Oh, my.
Get up, Carson.
Come on.
Go, go.
Carson, come on.
Carson, use that upper body strength
Let's go.
He doesn't have a lot.
Yeah, you didn't have to go there.
Where was my help?
How did I do?
Hurricane?
More like a light breeze.
Going fast is only half the race.
The other half is in the pit stop.
Let's see if your flight crew can get
it done in under 10 seconds.
See, Knuckles, this is very
complex, right?
There's five guys all working together,
kind of like a dance, very
synchronized dance that they're
all working together.
All got their specific job.
Sorry, were you saying something?
Let's go.
Let's go, bring it in.
Don't worry.
We're only down one.
One, two, three. Navy.
That was fast.
This next challenge should
feel pretty familiar.
We wanna see how fast you can get around
this so-called race track of yours.
It looks pretty sick to me.
Yeah, but what's the catch?
Damn it, Noah, dude save the tires, bro.
Hey, we're good. We're good.
I'm telling you, they're gonna
send someone after us.
Don't worry.
Unit 3
Please hold your position
on the south side.
How are you going to tell me that glazed
is better than strawberry?
Because it is.
Oh, shit.
There they are.
I think I got something for them.
Noah, don't do it, Noah.
Good morning, boys.
Yeeeoww
Dude, they're pissed.
We got it.
They're so pissed.
Oh, OK.
Open it up, Noah!
I'm trying.
Open it up!
Look at the delicate pastry.
I don't think you have much
optimism to you.
You're the one with the pink doughnut.
Damn!
Oh, my god!
I think they're coming.
We gotta go.
We cannot lose this.
I'm just dealing with them.
This course is sick.
Dude, this is a sick course.
We gotta go.
Grab a gear,
Let's go.
Come on, man.
Dude, we're almost there,
Right there.
Come on! Come on!
OK, we got it.
Show's over boys!
So, Knuckles, how do you like my driving?
Oh, my god, Noah.
Give it a rest.
To Sabrina Carpenter
at the Met Gala.
Yes.
Well, speaking of rumors, word on the
street is there's been some
unusual activity at the base since
those NASCAR drivers arrived.
Unusual how, Bert?
Well, a little birdie told me that the
Anduril 250 "Race the Base" weekend
hangs in the balance, after
the pilots and the drivers got
into some sort of unsanctioned showdown
to see who controls the runway.
And I'm sorry to say, Angela, it's not
looking good for your NASCAR boys.
As much as those drivers make me question
my marriage, Bert, these
are America's heroes we're talking about.
Maybe those NASCAR boys are better
off staying in their lane.
Ha, ha, yes.
Well, we'll be keeping
close tabs on who comes out
on top of that stars
and stripes sandwich.
This is bullshit.
We got to remember to bring SVG.
You started this whole thing, G.I. Joe?
It ain't over yet.
We're not losing that runway.
I'm bored.
Can we go back to the I-bar?
Look, tomorrow's the dogfight.
Who's flown with the Thunderbirds before?
Zilisch
All right, Connor. We
need you on this one, bud.
Dog fighting?
You got this.
You can do anything.
Except get in the I-Bar.
All right, man.
Or stand on the car at Watkins Glen.
Whoa.
Too soon, man.
At least I was in victory lane.
Hey, I'll give you some tips.
Hey, here's an idea.
How about anybody but Carson?
Hey, you scratched my visor. I'll
take that 'Vette off your hands.
Hey, man.
Give me some advice.
Keys are yours.
He's got more time on a saltwater head
than you got on one of these.
You don't stand a chance.
Save us some fuel.
Don't even go.
Great.
Okay, look.
He's top gun through and through.
He's gonna fight it the way they teach it.
Unless you do something biblical,
rip the wings off the jet.
All right, Connor, my boy,
welcome to dogfighting.
You're on weapons in the backseat. And
I'm guessing you haven't done this before.
I don't know, man.
I barely know what I'm looking
at back here.
Well you better figure it out
quick kid, because if you don't
you and your boys are done.
The bandit's going to
be out here hunting us.
You see anything out there?
Yeah... I see him.
Damn.
Alright look, I'll do all the work in the front seat and
get us behind him. Then it's up to you to take the shot.
You ready for this, Connor?
Uh...
Let's do this.
Here he comes up our right side.
Fight's on.
Now is your chance.
Take the shot.
Damn, missed him.
Shit, he'll be coming up behind us.
We gotta move.
That's not good.
Hold on.
Got you locked in now.
Hold on, kid.
Damn.
That was close.
He's turning back around.
What do you want to do, kid?
Got you now, nugget.
Connor, we gotta do something. Come on!
Unless you do something biblical,
rip the wings off the jet.
Come on, kid.
Alright.
We're gonna pull up and cut the engine.
Cut the engine?
Are you insane?
Just do it!
Nice knowing you kid.
Gotcha.
Pull!
Pull!
Now!
Drop the nose!
What the hell?
Falling in behind him, now's your chance.
Take the shot.
Come on.
Yes!
Holy shit.
That was badass.
Let's go buzz the tower.
Y'all sweating yet?
Bone dry.
Looking forward to playing a real sport?
Get ready to eat sand.
Stache here played in college,
so I hope you're ready to take
another beating.
You played in college?
Natty Champs, son.
Is that even a thing?
Hey, can we be skins?
Guys, I'm out.
I'm out!
Timeout, timeout, timeout.
Come on, guys.
Alright, let's go, let's go baby.
He really is the Natty champ.
Yeah, he is.
There's two of them, one of
me, and I can do it.
Six, seven, eight, all day long.
Double gun ball.
Ryan, Chase, we need a last lap pass.
You better do your fucking job.
Wait a minute.
You know, Chase, I think we gotta
go for the big one.
I think coach is right
Peek-a-boo?
Huh?
Coach is right on three.
One, two, three!
Coach is right!
Let's go, boys.
Let's go!
Yeah, Navy!
Come on, boys, let's go!
Come on, go!
Oh!
What are you doing?
Well it ain't over.
No way.
So, like, did you make all these?
So we're tied.
Now what?
No idea.
What do you think his tab's up to?
Noah, we're not bailing you out again.
Come sit down.
Bro, chill out.
I didn't even touch shit.
I'll be your wingman, buddy.
Ah, thanks dude.
Okay, I'm gonna call it a night, fellas.
Big thank you to Ryan for buying everyone
a round of cheer!
Well done, dude.
Hey, hat rule.
That's a classic.
Hey, you took one to the gut today.
Whoever threw that's got an
arm man. I'm still feeling the stang.
Hey, how about a little nectar
of the gods?
Hey, where's my drink, NASCAR?
You love to make a scene, don't you?
Sergeant Buzzkill, sir.
That's Lieutenant Buzzkill to you.
Come on, pay up.
I ain't got any money.
I'm not happy with what you pulled today.
It's dodgeball.
Relax.
Mm, it's a cheap shot.
Look, we got a full house tonight. Goober's
playing yacht rock, I'm gonna do a shoe beer.
Take a night off, my man.
Come on, have a beer.
Relax.
If he's staying, I'm out.
The best we don't associate
with your kind anyway.
My kind?
What's my kind?
I'll key your little puddle jumper.
Hey, now, those ain't prop planes.
You think we're missing
anything in there?
Nah.
Careless, reckless, no regard for order.
So just like he drives?
You all run your mouths an awful lot for
a bunch of kids playing
in some glorified go karts.
What did he just say?
Glorified go karts, huh?
I could smoke your ass in
a drag race any day.
Oh, shit.
That's a hell of a proposition.
Your car versus my jet?
See you in my rear view.
So I hear another rumor is,
Ryan Blaney said,
"Hey, let me take my car and race a jet."
Well, Ryan, I mean anything with
Ryan in it, please.
Yes, I know.
He's very handsome to you, Angela,
but he's racing a jet.
A literal jet, yes.
No, no, no.
You know the things that fly and have
fire coming out their tails?
Jets.
Super fast.
I don't like Blaney being put in
that much danger, Bert.
I do.
His face is too beautiful for that.
I think it's awesome.
You ready for this?
He's in a jet.
Hey, any tips?
Just don't turn left.
Oh, oh, we can confirm that a Cup car
and a jet are squaring
up for what looks like
So juicy.
Ooh, grit!
You are really in the thick of it.
I bet my first born's kidney
NASCAR wins this.
Let's go Ryan!
Hey, John, it's Stu from Mayhem's
Castle of the Gales.
Ow!
Whoa!
Oh, my God!
This is so good!
This is so cool!
We got it.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Ready?
My house!
My house!
Let's go!
Come on, let's go!
Woo!
Let's go!
Let's go, man!
Let's go!
Woooo!
It's my house!
Let's go!
This is my house!
This is my house!
Federally controlled airfield property.
I should feenab all of your asses.
What?
You been huffing jet fuel?
Is it killing your brain cells?
Or did you just come out of your
mama that damn stupid?
No, sir.
Shut up!
And you, you want to explain yourself?
Sir, I've embarrassed the cloth I wear,
the community, the name, the Navy
Shut up!
It's too bad.
Because you had a bright future.
All of you.
You will only be so lucky
If I don't have your asses riding the pine.
Sir, sir, sir.
What the hell do you want?
I gotta say something.
Son, this is Navy business
Yeah, but sir, they had nothing
to do with it.
I organized the drag race.
I pushed them to do it.
You know, that's cute.
You thinking that you can come in
here and tell me what to do.
You three, get the hell out of my office.
Listen to me, son.
We have been breaking our
damn backs for you
for the past two years to make
this race possible.
And that little stunt that
you just pulled out there
could have cost you the
whole damn thing.
Yeah.
Do you understand what I'm going to
have to do in order to keep you here?
Huh?
You know what?
Just get out of my office.
And while you're at it, you tell those
pilots in mind if they step
so much as one toe out of line, they
will be eating burnt rubber
for breakfast for the rest of
their miserable lives.
Yes, sir.
Good afternoon, sir.
So, who won?
The pilots, sir, but just by a hair.
It's going to be one hell of a race
Yes Sir.
I'm not here to say thank you.
Well, I'd throw up if you did.
Y'all have got some brass ones
going up against the U.S. Navy
It's been a hell of a week.
I'm sorry for being so tough on you,
but, err... you boys got something special.
You'll do well here.
Yeah, you wouldn't make a half
bad NASCAR driver either.
I guess he's Stache-ing a nine-car
pile-up for sure.
No, man, I just want to rip beers
and fly jets, you dorks.
Well, a bet's a bet, so
Nah.
You've suffered enough
Yeah, what you pulled back there?
That was badass, man.
Whatever you guys need, we're in.
We got you.
What do you mean?
We can race?
I mean, this week you've shown
that you deserve respect.
You've shown honor, courage,
and commitment.
Even you, Noah.
So, it's on then?
Yeah.
Strap in, boys!
We're back.
No way.
Yeah, let's go!
I'll be down in a minute.
Give me a minute.
We are back.
What's the name on the tab?
Noah Gragson, but
you can just call me Rizz.
Cash or card?
I do card
Holy shit.
You ready to Race the Base, brother?
I think the real question is,
is America ready?