Natural Born Lovers (2012) Movie Script

Hello? Anybody in there?
Say something if you're there!
If no one's there, who would answer?
Anybody in there?
Why are you using Japanese?
No one answered in Cantonese
Maybe he would if I used Japanese
What's with the cursing?
Then what do we do now? The groom is missing!
This is really bad!
Then we won't get to eat any abalone?
Eat, eat, eat... I'll tell you what to eat!
Just keep looking!
Hurry up, move!
Hello
In the toilet, taking a piss, and by myself.
I feel like watching a movie.
Right now?
Why? Are you so busy right now?
I... I'm in the middle of a meeting
That is all. Bye-bye.
Er...
Hello?
Boss! We can't find you, where did you go?
I... The signal isn't very good here.
Call you back when I'm in a better spot. Bye.
"One year ago"
Hey granny, do you know where the toilet is?
Are you blind, kid?
Just from a glance, you shouldn't guess
that I'm no more than 25.
Especially with Angelina Jolie's good looks,
Jessica Alba's tight body,
And Sharon Stone's sharp wits.
Why Sharon Stone?
And your point is?
Oh, forget it!
Oh...
You really look like...
Like what? What?
- Does it hurt?
- Yes!
- Does it hurt?
- Yes!
Pinch me! Pinch me!
- Does it hurt?
- Ouch!
- Does it hurt?
- It freaking hurts!
Exactly!
You really are my idol!
What idol? You're mistaken.
No way!
Don't think I can't recognize you now
that you've grown up.
I've waited a long time for this day.
Here. Help me hold my bag.
You see?
You are Little Tayler!
Don't think I can't recognize you now
that you're grown up.
Look just the same! Can't deny it now, right?
Hey granny, what kind of weirdo
walks around carrying old gossip mags?
Idol, don't think I'm an idiot.
I borrowed these from your fans
so that I could take them into the toilet
And reminisce while taking a dump!
My fans?
Today is our International
Little Tayler Fan Club meeting.
We gather once a month to watch your films!
People still watch films like this?
This is the one where your cat has kidney failure,
and you donate your own to save him.
How can you put a human kidney in a cat?
And that's why you die! It's so tragic!
Girls! Look who's here!
Our idol!
Save some for me, girls!
Fai, I love you so much!
What was that about...
I really love you! Don't leave me!
I really love you!
- Don't you know that?
- Let go of me.
I really love you!
- Don't leave me!
- Just let me go, okay?
Let me move on already.
I'm begging you!
If it's because of her,
How come it's all blurred?
I love you, Fai!
Go to hell, bitch! Dammit!
You've messed up my hair!
Oh!
"This is the first time they met"
"Three months later"
Hey! Bro! This way.
If your sister happens to ask,
tell her I went fishing with you last night.
Using me for another alibi?
We were classmates in primary,
you wouldn't sell me out, right?
She'd probably kill me if she found out.
I was sneaking some on the side.
So, it's settled, then! I gotta go.
Bro!
If you have something, say it.
It's freezing out here.
When your sister asks where I went with you,
Remember: say we played Mahjong all night.
But I don't know how to play.
Actually, last night was
my girl's mother's birthday.
We had dinner in Shenzhen... game meats.
Do you have to involve me every single time, man?
Bro!
We were classmates in high school,
You won't just let me burn
without helping out, will you?!
Here, have a smoke.
No, really. You know how crazy she gets.
If she finds out about this, she'll kill me
and then go and kill herself!
I promise you. Just one more time!
Hey... Bro...
You don't have to say it.
What do you need me to say?
Bro, you must be a big fan of "Lie to Me", eh?
Just remember to tell her that
we were at a wake all last night.
Who died?
Actually, just my girl's dog.
So I spent the whole night
on her bed consoling her.
Isn't an all-night wake a bit implausible?
- Got anything better?
- There's no time!
Look, we were classmates in college,
don't tell me you're not helping me on this.
You know how violent she is.
If she ever found out,
she'd kill me first, then you, and then herself.
I get the chills just thinking about it.
I'll take this as a yes, then.
I'll head up first.
Fishing, mahjong, funeral...
You lost! Lucky, you get to drink!
Hi! Hey!
Hey, brother-in-law!
- Hey, brother!
- You're so late!
You guys are so on time. Order anything, yet?
Of course not! We're waiting for you!
Come on... have a drink first!
Later, later...
Let's order first.
Don't bother. Let her do it.
Hey, bro!
Tell us if you did anything
interesting last night!
Well, yesterday, this guy here...
Hey, I know where you went!
How do you know where I went?
What, your apprentice told me
you were baking cakes all night,
and you didn't even have dinner.
You fucker!
You said you went fishing with my brother.
Well, I... bro!
I really did go fishing with him!
Come on... How about you clear this up.
Look, here's what happened.
He called me yesterday while I was baking,
said he was at Kowloon City Pier
and the fish were jumping and snapping.
Well, you know how I like it that way.
So eventually... I agreed to go snag some,
Dropped what I was doing,
and caught a cab to join you.
Then where are the fish?
Why didn't I see you bring a damned one home?
He just likes the action,
It's got nothing to do with the fish.
And since you're always swearing,
To offset your Karma, we let them go free.
He helped out, too!
Bastard! Didn't you say you guys
played mahjong all night?
They went fishing!
No, honey, I really did play mahjong all night.
Hey, bro! Damn you!
You're spitting it out in pieces.
You'd better straighten this out!
Actually, what happened was this:
As the two of us were sitting there fishing...
This guy called up and wanted to play mahjong,
so since we'd been at it a good while
and wanted a break, we told him to bring
the tiles over to the pier and played four rounds.
Man, that place was really lucky, eh?
I won hand after hand.
Pures, Three Great Dragons,
Four Great Blessings...
They said I was practically a Mahjong God!
You're so great? Then who lost the most?
Old Wong from that store one street over!
Wong?
Didn't you say he died
and you'd be at his wake all night?
How could he possibly lose?
Bro, how about you try
and answer these suspicions.
Me again?
Just do what you can.
What finally happened was this:
So the three of us
were playing mahjong at the pier
and we thought we'd call Old Wong to join.
But when we called,
it turned out he was already dead.
Since last night was his wake,
why not just bring the tiles to the funeral home?
You played at a funeral parlour?
Well, there's no commission and
the AC is really good.
Most importantly, no complaints
for playing a few more rounds.
Now that we're all clear
on last night's whereabouts,
We'd really best order some food, okay?
Hold on!
Now what?
Not everyone's here.
Who else is missing?
Mom found a girl from Canada and
flew her here especially to meet you.
What?
Son of a bitch!
Why the hell isn't she here, yet?
Excuse me, is this the Cheung's?
So you're Ching?
I am. Mrs. Cheung asked me to come!
Sit down, Ching, we've been waiting for you.
So, Ching, are you in Hong Kong
for work, or on holiday?
Actually, I'm an air hostess, so I fly everywhere.
Back in Canada, Mrs. Cheung keeps telling me
to come over and have dinner with you guys.
Don't worry, we three sisters
are all very friendly.
You guys are sisters?
Oh, the white girl is adopted,
so she's not as pretty as us.
A lot of people also screw that up.
Nice to meet you! Pretty girl!
You're an air hostess, right?
I work security, so we're both in uniform.
This truly is fate.
You bastard,
is this my brother's blind date or yours?
If you don't sit down right now,
I'll slit my wrists, you fucking bastard!
Hey, brother! See what she likes to eat!
A bowl is okay, right?
Our family likes to drink tea this way.
Doesn't it seem better in a bowl?
So then, are you tired?
How about we catch a movie?
Well, if you don't want to,
you shouldn't force yourself.
What? Why would I be forced to?
Does it seem that way?
Actually, I sincerely wanted to ask
If you would come see a movie with me.
And actually... we can all stop pretending.
What do you mean?
You think I don't know?
We're both here tonight
because of our mothers
But I hope you don't mind if I'm frank.
What?
You're not my cup of tea.
That works out,
because you're not my type, either.
Then that's good!
Why?
I already have a boyfriend.
You have a boyfriend
and still went on a blind date?
Doesn't that make you a cheater?
Just kidding!
Let me introduce you.
This is my boyfriend, Taro.
This is Mr. Cheung.
Greetings, Mr. Taro.
Nice to meet you.
Japanese?
My mom doesn't like me dating Japanese guys,
So I haven't dared tell her.
She hates Japanese so much,
was she a comfort woman or...
No, they're now called
"Flowers of Nanking, " right?
Nothing like that!
It's just lately the Yen exchange rate
has gotten too high.
It's getting late. We ought to get going.
Bye Bye!
Mr. Cheung, hope to see you soon!
Okay.
Hey buddy, this is a stickup!
What the fuck?!
What kind of man walks around with just a 20?
Even I bring 100 bucks with me
on the job. What's your problem?
Hey, man, I figured a delivery
a couple blocks away
wouldn't even click the taxi meter.
You just need money, right?
Cut me free. I'll give you my watch.
I'm a loafer, I never wear a watch!
I don't want to be trapped by time!
I have a phone
in my breast pocket, take it.
If I take your Phone,
Wouldn't you use GPS to track me down?
No way!
So what do you want?
Give me all your valuables!
Well, you've already invested in a gun,
Why not just go over there and rob the bank.
That would net you even more.
Well, I bought this little piece of junk
over at that stationery store's closing sale
for 12 bucks.
But it works pretty well, eh?
Wow, you are one hell of a thief!
Both hell and heaven begin with alphabet H,
which means I'm already one step closer to heaven!
Look how free I am!
Oh... free... Oh...
Since you're so free,
Why don't you take the 20 and go?
Minus your investment in that thing,
You're still up by 8 bucks, eh?
There must be valuables!
Let me take a look.
You really have nothing!
These are real cakes.
Save me! Hey!
Huh?
Yeah.
- Bro! I really need your help this time!
- What is it?
I dropped my wallet
and don't have money to pay the bill!
I lost again? You win each time and I lose.
Are you two working together?
You saw me shaking them
Let me check to see
if the ones you put in are fake.
Bro! What're you...
Your head is all wet and your face is green.
You swim here?
You said you ate and don't have the money,
So I walked a few blocks and helped you get money.
What do want?
Eating is right.
But check this out over here.
It won't be me,
but my little buddy doing the eating!
Then can we go now?
No, you just got here.
Have a seat, we'll order some more.
My little buddy is hungry again, too!
If you're hungry, take your time
I did bring the money.
Money, money, money...
Should be enough for you.
If you're not going, I am.
Since you're here, take some with you.
Let me introduce you.
I held on to these two girls, especially for you.
This steamy, hot, juicy little one
is called Wing.
This one is even better
Not as hot, but look!
Her tits are popping out! Her name is Yuki.
- Let's have some fun!
- Take care of him.
Have a drink. Let's play dice.
I'm not feeling too well today.
- I'm cold and shivering...
- Hey handsome,
you want to blow?
What?
It's my birthday today! Blow it out with me!
No thanks... Get her to do it.
Everyone freeze!
This is an ID check.
Pull out your identifications.
And stop messing around!
You don't have to be so fierce for an ID check.
It's my tutor's birthday. Is that a crime?
Are you giving me attitude?
You bet I'm giving you attitude, officer.
Do you want to come down to the station?
This is ridiculous
You better hope I can't find my ID...
Hey! Bro. Bro!
Hey, that's my bed!
Thanks.
Hello?
Hey, you up? Everything okay?
Where are you?
Back home watching entertainment news!
You dumped me at the hospital and just went home?
I didn't want to,
But I saw the karaoke entrance
was surrounded by paparazzi.
Huh? What paparazzi?
They were photographing you.
Photographing me? No, really?
But it should be fine.
They probably don't know I'm in the hospital
Well, that's not true.
When I left, I saw them
chasing after your ambulance.
Unless something happened,
they should be at the door.
I suggest you find a good way out of there!
Did you see Little Tayler?
Take a look over there!
You're right!
They are saying they already have a headline
What was it?
"Ex-child star slumming it with Mong Kok girls"
I think they're just missing your head shot.
Can't talk.
L'['S you?
This is a hospital,
who let you wander around? What do you want?
Sorry, nurse. It's just that I got lost.
And want to find a way out.
Can you tell me?
Why should I tell you?
You think I don't recognise you?
When I was being robbed today
You were there and just walked away.
Forget it. Now I'm asking you
how to leave the hospital,
do you have to give me attitude?
Fine. I won't ask you.
That night I was getting beaten,
you pretended not to see.
Hell with you, bitch! I've had enough!
Well, we each had a turn.
Let's call it even, okay?
But nurse, I really am in a hurry.
How about you lead the way.
Ideally, a way that's quieter, with fewer people.
Lend a hand, would you?
Hey, why are you taking my photo?
I'll scream!
I'm not taking photos of you,
I'm taking the photos of this lift.
Who would do something like that?
Did you know,
though this lift is a little old,
it was made in Germany,
and we've been in here a while,
yet it's steady and quiet,
and the temperature control is just right.
It absolutely a very good lift!
This hospital is surprisingly generous
in buying such a quality lift.
You repair lifts?
You could say I'm more professional than that
To tell the truth,
I'm a Lifetime Honorary Member
of the Hong Kong Elevator Club.
This is my membership card.
There's a club like that?
Why not?
Some people like collecting stamps,
some like dancing.
Why can't someone like lifts?
Did you know,
Lift is one of the most important inventions
in human history.
Since its invention,
People didn't have to take the stairs
after coming from work.
Since its invention,
People could spend more time
with their families.
While improving work efficiency.
Do you know the most important thing?
It reduced the chance of falling on your ass.
After hearing what I've said,
Don't you feel a growing interest in lifts?
Actually, we are recruiting
new members right now.
How about...
...we get out of this lift.
Go straight ahead and take another lift down,
Once at the bottom, push open the doors
And you'll be at the bus stop.
Quiet? No one there, right?
Not a soul.
That's best I can hope for.
Nurse, thank you so much.
But I think you should seriously consider
joining our elevator club
We have lots of gatherings and activities,
Like holding a birthday party in a lift,
a big raffle draw,
And one time even did karaoke inside a lift.
Doesn't that make you want to join?
Sure...
I'll think about it.
Call me once you've decided.
Here. This is my card.
If you want to buy cakes, I'll give you 20% off.
Oh, so nice of you.
It's really nothing. I should be thanking you.
Well... thank you.
Thank You.
I'd better get back to work.
- All right, bye!
- Bye!
Stop taking photos! Which paper do you work for?
No pictures! No photos!
I want to see my idol!
The boss isn't here.
Don't lie to me.
I know my idol is inside,
All I want is an autograph.
If you would like to buy cakes,
please register over here.
Register nothing!
My idol, I don't mind you chasing young girls!
So what if guys play around,
as long as he knows his way home!
My idol, I will wait for you at home!
Dear Idol, I'm going home to cook dinner
and prepare a bubble bath for you.
Remember to come home soon.
Bye!
Take care.
Boss, come over here.
Please be more careful with your private life.
Everyone knows about your thing
for young girls. I don't mind.
But now you've got two crazy chicks
coming here, too!
Yeah, are you kidding me?
Dealing with crazy women like that every day.
Is an occupational hazard.
I told you, I'm innocent!
How did I know that bitch
would lead me to that exit?
I can't be sure if she didn't do it on purpose.
On purpose? Does she have a grudge against you?
Just talking about it is starting to piss me off!
If I ever see that damned...
bitch.
- Hey, come watch!
- What?
Nurse,
You threw me under the bus already.
Why would I want to speak to you again?
I'm really sorry.
But I really didn't know reporters would be there!
I truly didn't know!
I have nothing to say to you.
And I won't believe anything you say.
Oh... I get it.
Why, when I was asking you
to join the elevator club, didn't you join?
It was because you wanted to lay a trap for me.
Hey, you have got me all wrong.
I don't even like taking the lift.
I usually take the stairs.
So we don't share the same interests.
Okay, I have your apology. You can go now.
Doesn't like taking the lift, how strange.
Aside from apologizing,
- I also have a favour to ask.
- What's that?
I want to learn to make cakes.
I haven't taken on students in a long time.
Look, you don't have to take me as a student,
I just want to bake one cake.
Do you know how much I charge
to show how to make one cake?
However much, say it. I'll pay it.
Ten grand. How about that?
Hey, what're you doing?
Can we start now?
Are we ready yet?
Are you in a rush?
Nope.
Well that's good.
Right, about the cake...
What kind do you want to make?
Anything is fine.
Anything? That won't do.
If you want me to make a cake,
it won't be just anything.
Then you decide!
Then is it for someone else or yourself?
It's a gift.
Who?
I have to tell you that?
Well, of course!
There's an inspiring story
behind every cake.
Everyone has their own cake. You see?
Boyfriend.
Current?
Ex.
Y? Z?
Just kidding. Why are you so serious?
Let's start.
Done!
Do you want to taste it?
No, thanks. I'm on a diet.
My time is up!
You in a rush?
Do you have a car?
I do.
Can you take me somewhere?
Where to?
- I'll tell you on the way.
- What?
Oh! We don't even have the cake.
Such lovely cake needs a fancy box.
Wait a sec.
Darn, I've forgotten where I put the boxes!
I'll call and order some.
But I left the phone number at home...
So are we there yet, or what?
This is it. Thank you for today.
- Thanks.
- You didn't have to.
Really, you can go now.
What?
I'm fine, you don't have to keep me company.
- It's no problem. I don't mind.
- No need, really.
Gotta go. Bye!
What?
Fai.
How many times have I told you not to call.
Don't you know my wife checks my phone?
I had to lie and say I went out to get pizza.
Bobo... don't get so attached to me.
I can't even scare you off.
I'm begging you, just let me go.
Happy Birthday!
My birthday is not till next week.
It's your wife's birthday tomorrow.
How did you know?
We were classmates in primary school, remember?
I introduced you two at
my birthday party years ago,
Then you made out with her,
and then you dumped me!
Bobo... You don't have to drag up the past.
Wait a sec.
Is the cake for me or for her?
It's for you.
Didn't you say you'd try a cake when I made one?
I made one.
I didn't lie.
Thank you.
You're just trying to get me in trouble.
How am I going to take it back upstairs?
Just tell her you couldn't get any pizza,
and instead got her a cake as a surprise.
You are such a good liar,
I shouldn't even have to tell you.
That's true.
Is it the kind that I like, chocolate?
It is.
If that's all, I'll head back up.
Can't we talk a little more?
Bobou.
I lied to my wife about coming down for pizza,
if she sees us together there'll be hell to pay.
Isn't there anything you want to say to me?
Our romance is like that song by Joey Yung...
"From this minute,
washed by Spring winds and Autumn rain,
In half year's time leaving
but traces of what once was pain."
You just like to play around,
why do you have to drag Joey into this?
Bobo... It's just a break-up.
Don't let it get to you.
William So sang,
"Dreams you can't recall,
Serve their purpose no more."
Who are you, kid?
I'm Bobo's boyfriend!
What, you're dating?
Congratulations! Since you're stuck with...
I am relieved that someone can take care of her.
How long have you two been going out?
Just recently.
Is that so?
Buddy, Bobo has loads of "surprises".
You'd never guess
I really wish you well.
Really, Bobo...
You have someone new to play with,
I'm yesterday's news.
This is great! Someone to finally take my place!
Even better than winning the lottery!
Why did you say you are my boyfriend back there?
I don't get
why you'd like that four-eyed frog.
Unless he's very rich or very well-educated,
Or he's so generous that he donates
his organs to the needy.
Or he helps old ladies cross the street.
That's him to a T.
Really?
Back there... Thanks for that.
That's alright.
Well, this area is pretty nice, isn't it?
Here?
Of course it's nice here!
Here, it's quiet, but so close to town.
Over there is the subway station,
the mall and cinema are only
a ten minute walk away.
Over there are lots of reputable schools.
When you have kids, you won't have to
worry about finding a school.
And a feng shui master said,
That the dragon's treasure will
run right through here next year.
And all the residents here will be blessed.
And their dreams will come true.
Are you a nurse or a real estate agent?
I have always been interested in real estate.
Why don't you move here, if it's so good?
I did live here,
but that jerk kicked me out.
Sorry.
You don't have to say sorry.
You didn't kick me out.
Well, yeah...
Hey, it's pretty late.
Why don't I drive you home?
Your cakes are so expensive,
Riding with you would cost even more.
I'm out of money
I was just kidding about ten grand for a cake.
Here, take it back.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- I'll take a taxi then.
- It's your call.
OK!
- Bye.
- Bye.
Oh, one more thing.
Joey Yung also sang,
"Broken hearts in Spring, Are mended by the Fall.
Hard bitterness wanes to a lull."
I'm not good with words. But you understand.
Try it the next time you do karaoke
Bye.
"One Week Later"
There's something wrong with your cake!
It will make people sick!
I don't care, I want to see your boss!
You're finally back!
What's the problem?
This... lady wants to see you.
Boss.
So it is you!
Are you sick in the head
putting something like that in a cake?
What are you talking about, miss?
What am I talking about? You know exactly what!
You... you put something in your cake
that's...
Honey, I told you not to come!
Let it go! Leave it be!
- Let's just go home!
- Oh, honey!
I'm going to sue them!
I'm going to sue their pants off!
How? We ate the whole thing!
Without evidence, there's nothing we can do!
Was the cake no good?
If you didn't like it,
I could make you another one.
You eat it yourself!
Your cake had... shit!
Ever since eating your cake,
she's had to brush her teeth 20, 30 times a day.
And has started talking in her sleep,
saying her mouth smells like shit.
I took her to a psychiatrist,
he said to just let her brush.
Brush however and whenever.
At least she's not a shopaholic,
throwing away my money.
But that cake wasn't made by...
I mean... I did make it...
But I didn't know that
inside there was, you know...
I know... Only Bobo could do something like that.
I knew she wouldn't let me off so easy.
Don't worry, I'm not going to sue you.
It's not exactly something
I'd like everyone to know.
I would never guess that you'd be so easygoing.
You'd make a good friend.
Thinking back to when I was eating that cake,
I even thought it was some
new shit-flavoured chocolate.
What the fuck.
It was actually chocolate-flavoured shit.
I hope you don't mind my saying...
Treating Bobo like that...
Sure, she went a little overboard...
But you must expected some payback, right?
Look,buddy.
You know that love is like a TVB serial:
Each director will shoot five random episodes,
you won't know which episode will be any good
unless you have the patience to watch them all.
Even TVB's serials!
You only know how I treated Bobo,
it's not like you know how she treated me, right?
I'm going to the toilet.
Can you manage on your own?
I'll be okay.
Just don't mess with my things.
I'll be right back.
Done! Do you want to taste it?
No, thanks.
Sorry I involved you.
No, I'm not blaming you for anything.
I just wanted to say something,
that splitting up is only that,
what's the point of doing all that?
The more stunts you pull, the more he'll hate you.
If I can't make him love me,
At least I can make him hate me!
That way he'll have to remember me!
Do whatever you want.
Have you ever loved someone?
Have you ever hurt someone you loved?
If you have, you'll understand how I feel.
"This is their first fight."
Alright, ready, one... two... three.
Okay, my turn. Here...
So, is it any good?
L'E'S good!
Well, the lift is quite old.
You can tell by the sound of its motor.
It's older than my granddad.
But nevermind its age.
It isn't the least bit slow.
From the 9th floor, down to here,
took less than 2 minutes,
my cup noodle's not even ready yet!
There was once a designer,
his name was "Mel Liftson",
he went crazy after he was dumped.
Full of resentment, he later designed a lift.
It is "The Lonely Lift".
Legend has it only one person can ride it.
If two try to ride it, they both die.
Can it be that evil?
Do you two have the balls to go
and try it out together?
No thanks, it's time for my wife to feed the baby.
I'm going back to help, See you.
And I'll help him.
Then I guess I don't have to fight for it.
Why are you here?
So this is the lift?
Yes, this is the one.
Can I take it?
Of course you can, come.
- You first.
- Okay.
What about you?
This lift can only take one person at a time.
So... you go first,
I'll go to the next floor,
then we come out, I'll go in,
and so on and so forth!
That complicated?
Not at all.
It's like going for a car ride,
only we are going for a lift ride.
I'll wait for you upstairs!
Wow, you were quick.
I'm an athlete.
The lift... was okay?
- Yah.
- Let me, let me...
You're quite fast yourself!
Don't you know
I run the marathon every year?
Hurry LIP!
Count me in next year for the marathon.
Be careful, the stairwell is dark.
It's okay, I know.
Brush my hair a bit, so I'll look good
next time she sees me
Touch up my makeup, so I don't look silly.
It takes a long time.
Top floor. Ride's over.
So soon?
We can do it again next time.
Next time? When's next time?
Now that you've joined our club,
There'll be plenty of lifts to take.
So what now?
Now you... Take the lift down,
I will... Take the stairs down.
Why not go down together?
Don't you see curse warnings?
Go in together, die together!
I never took you to be so superstitious!
Aren't you scared?
If you're not, neither am I.
You could die.
Together, then.
Huh. You're quite brave.
But why are you hands so cold?
Born that way.
Perfect. I know a Chinese doctor,
I'll take you to him.
Why did the door close by itself?
Don't worry. I know why.
The lift must have realized
there are two of us in here.
But if you don't breathe or talk,
It won't be able to tell.
But you were the only one talking.
Hey! I told you not to talk.
This lift has malice!
Shit!
We're stuck, that's all.
It's not that simple!
We're doomed this time...
You like taking lifts so much,
wouldn't it be nice to die here?
You love planes, would you want to die in a crash?
What's happening?
Damn! Why are the walls so close?
What's wrong with you?
To tell you the truth,
I have a kind of... claustrophobia!
What? After all this time,
you've never been trapped in a lift?
No, never!
Shit, I'm having difficulty breathing.
You're going to be okay, right?
Why don't you close your eyes?
- Close your eyes.
- Close my eyes?
Maybe you'll feel better.
Well?
It's worse than before.
What happened?
Just trying to distract you.
No.
Just then... did you feel a kind of ...shuddering?
Right?
Unbelievable!
You still want to make it down, right?
Still not there?
"They have kissed for a long long time..."
Oh no! It's time to go to work.
One more kiss.
I'm already over two hours late.
Let's have dinner after work.
Call you after work.
Call me!
Bye!
Hello?
Guess who this is.
It's me!
I really miss you!
Don't you know that missing someone means that
you'll only miss them
when they're not next to you.
I'm hanging out here, right in front of you,
how can you miss me?
But even when you're by my side,
I still miss you!
This kind of miss is even more than
your average kind!
What the hell?!
Hey, well, this place looks kind of messy,
and there's a lot of laundry to be done.
Why don't you take care of it?
It's just the two of us, why bother?
Hey, you are a nurse,
how can you be so messy?
That's why I'm in intensive care!
Meaning?
People there are unconscious, so no one complains!
Damn, even worse.
Okay... I'm off to work.
Wait!
If not a kiss, then I want a hug!
For how long?
Hold me tight!
Tighter, or it doesn't count!
What are you, possessed?
Hang on. If something's wrong, say it... Sit down.
Judging by your looks, it could only be
one kind of thing: you're all after the same guy.
Don't worry. You can take today off
to find a new guy, sound good?
Boss, as long as you're with that girl,
It wouldn't matter how many guys we meet.
What does this have to do with Bobo?
Whenever she can't find you,
She calls us, which is fine.
But she calls our boyfriends!
That's right. Now she's crazy enough
to call my boyfriend and scare him, saying
He'll be in for it if he can't find you!
What can I do?
Alright, okay.
I'll tell Bobo, that from now on, just talk to me,
and leave you guys alone, okay?
Is that all?
What else?
At least some compensation for mental anguish!
Our weak hearts are so easily traumatized!
So traumatised... It hurts!
I'm in such pain! Boss!
Ouch... boss, it hurts...
Okay, okay, okay. I'll pay you.
Just go.
You can clean up, boss. Thank you!
Hey!
Hey, bro!
I heard you're dating and have gone into hiding.
It's nothing like that.
So, are you free tonight?
What's up?
It's my birthday, come out for a drink!
Drinking? Sounds interesting...
Come on now, Do you need
to submit a request for that?
For you to go to hell!
But wait,
Guys are saying that
your girlfriend is a real drag.
Fine! Time, place, who's going, spill it!
That's more like it. See you at the old place
See you there!
Honey... it's me...
Hold on! Aren't you forgetting something?!
Okay, continue.
Well, it's like this...
I can't keep you company tonight.
Since a relative of mine just passed away,
I have to go to his wake...
he was my fourth great-uncle
I don't remember you mentioning
any fourth great-uncle.
I don't remem... I...
I mean I only learned of his existence last week.
It's a shame. I didn't get
to see him at least once.
But I really miss you.
I really miss you, too...
I'll be back soon.
Only if it's just a little while.
Of course just a little while,
I'll just bow and come right back.
Don't bow too long, either.
Call me when you're done bowing.
Okay. Alright, bye!
You forgot again!
Good boy!
OK! Bye bye!
Yes!
Cheers!
- Let me feel...
- Five, ten... five, ten...
- Five, ten...
- that's not bad...
License check!
Hi!
Shit!
Why are you so late? Get yourself something!
You think I'm like you guys,
Carefree, nothing to do?
Hold on! Why's it look like it shrunk?
- Alright, come on... Let's drink!
- Cheers!
If you're drinking to drown your troubles,
Let's drink till we drop!
Don't you guys think
women are really weird creatures?
They change completely once you start dating them.
Even faster than getting a face lift.
Before you date them,
Easygoing and eager to please at first,
But afterwards, they want to control everything.
It's really bloody weird.
I'm just her boyfriend,
It's not like I'm her dog, right?
You know, it's the same way with mine.
When we were dating, she was so shy.
If I told her to sit, she wouldn't dare stand.
Tell her to go to bed, she wouldn't get out of it.
After marriage... forget about it.
You know what she said on our wedding night?
"Hurry the fuck up. I'm fucking tired."
I was so shocked,
I couldn't get it up for a long time!
Eventually, I took her to a doctor.
Do you know what it turned out to be?
She was diagnosed Tourettes, can you believe it!
As a security guard,
If people don't listen up, of course we'll swear.
But not her!
She even swears at the doctor.
"Hurry the fuck up. I'm fucking tired".
I am feeling sad.
I want a squeeze, come on, let me!
Fuck! That's why I always say:
Dating ought to be like shopping.
If you buy something, but later don't like it,
Or it's wrong, take it back for an exchange!
If they don't let you exchange, go and
File a complaint with
the Consumer Protection Bureau.
If that doesn't work, lynch them!
In dating, there's always false advertising.
But there's never a return policy!
Just like your sister,
When I first met her, she said to me
she had an alcohol allergy.
Afterwards, come to find out
she drinks harder than me!
Do you know how she explained it to me?
She said,
"My allergy is from
not having enough alcohol".
What bullshit is that!
Her scamming ways just keep getting worse!
Crime Watch should have an episode on her!
Your problems are nothing compare to mine!
The one I've got is the worst!
When I first met her, she said
she was white and everything.
What the fuck!
Turns out she doesn't know a word of English!
Holy shit!
If she's white, you ought to pay more,
But pretending to be white,
shouldn't I get a discount?
She ought to be paying you!
Bro, your whole family is full of deceivers.
Now you're the one being deceived.
That's what you call karma! Cheers!
- Let's drink to karma!
- You're having quite a good time.
Why are you here, Bobo?
It should be me asking you!
Didn't you say you were going to a funeral?
Why would you end up here?
Why am I here?
Oh, right. Because his great-uncle
was already 109 years old,
so we really ought to be celebrating.
So we're here to drink to him, right?
Right!
...to drink to him?
Right!
When he was alive,
he was always drunk!
He rented out this whole place to party!
Here. This bottle is one he had saved.
Since everyone is here,
We should all toast to great-uncle, right?
To great-uncle!
Drink!
What about them?
Who are they?!
Who are they?
They're great-uncle's granddaughters.
Let me introduce you. Number 3, number 6,
Number 147, number 6, and number 3.
Say hi to your sister-in-law.
Say hi to sis!
Don't they have names?
Don't they have names?!
Oh, right. Great-uncle was really old, you see.
He was worried he couldn't remember their names,
So he gave them all numbers!
That's right. Numbers are much easier...
Shut up!
You think I'm an idiot, don't you?
You're right.
Let me ask you again!
Do you have a good explanation?
I'll take care of this. You guys take off.
Bro!
Take off!
Okay!
Hey, what are you doing?
Paying UP!
No! Let me!
Hey, how about I get it this time.
Fuck off!
Check all this bling,
you think I don't have the cash?
Are you looking down on me?
No! Let me do it!
I have it. I've got it for real this time.
I'll take care of this. You guys take off!
And the girls?
Take them with you.
I know another place where great-uncle partied,
Let's go right now and keep drinking to him!
Better call great-uncle first.
Call him?
We burned phone offering for him!
What else do you want to say to me?
How did you know I was here?
I put a GPS tracker in your phone,
of course I know where you are.
I know everywhere you're going!
Bobou.
Doesn't that just make it no fun for both of us?
Since we got together,
have I ever checked to see where you were?
That's because I don't have
secrets for you to check.
You men are all the same,
You all just love to lie!
If you're doing karaoke, then go.
Why do you have to say your great-uncle is dead?
How can you be so disrespectful?
I don't even have a fourth great-uncle!
Which means you lied!
Don't you get tired of doing this all the time?
As much as you lie, of course you would get tired!
I mean dragging on someone all the time.
Don't you get tired of that?
I'm not dragging on you! I love you!
If you love someone, you don't get tired!
I'm very tired. Does that mean I don't love you?
What did you say?
I'm very tired...
I'm really very tired...
You'd better know what you're saying!
Oh, shit.
Bobo Missed Call (367)
Hey, Bobo... It's me.
I think I must have had too much to drink
and blacked out last night.
So whatever I might have said, I really...
don't remember any of it!
So please be the bigger person
and don't blame me for
whatever childish things I'd said.
If you get this message,
Please call me back as soon as you can.
Thank you, bye.
Love you.
Hi!
You got my message, right?
Where did you go last night?
You had me scared.
Do you know who I am?
You got drunk last night.
I left and you never even noticed.
I'm sorry.
I don't want to hear your "sorry."
Please show me that you are.
Can you do that?
What do you want me to do?
I want you to give up drinking.
Give up drinking? I almost never drink.
I see many cases like yours at the hospital.
It always starts off as just a little,
then gets worse and worse.
After they get drunk,
They lie, fight, and cause all kinds of trouble.
Is it that serious?
Do you not want to give it up?
I will. What's the big deal.
For real?
Sure. What do you want me to do?
I spoke with the doctor at my hospital today and
he set up an excellent cessation program for you.
Just follow each step and
that's it.
Ok, so what do I do for the first step?
Wear this at dinner tonight.
You even bought something for me!
Are you kidding me?
- Bobo...
- Yes?
This doctor friend of yours...
Does he have something against you or just me?
I think this method is totally ineffective.
I'd love to drink myself to death right now.
How bout I take it off, okay?
No way!
Don't you know that psychoanalytic studies
show that what you feel works
by making you hate the way
you look when you drink.
If you see a bottle again,
It will always remind you
of the shame you feel tonight.
Really?
But I don't hate myself at all
I just hate them!
They keep taking my picture.
Makes me want to smack them!
Why don't I take it off and go home.
No way!
Not until you've done two more rounds,
Don't you know that shame has to be built up?
Forget it! I'm going home!
If you go, we're breaking up!
Well, that's not necessary.
It's just walking around. No need to be so petty.
Come on! Let's go...
- Then let's get dinner.
- Oh.
Wylie...
What are you doing?
I have to keep it on when I'm eating?
Of course!
Who was that girl back there?
You wouldn't know if I told you.
Of course I won't if you don't tell me!
Fine, I won't take it off.
Had it on all day, anyway.
You still have to tell me.
Waiter, I want to order.
Wow, doing Halloween early?
What'll you have?
Is she an ex?
Why ask if you already know?
How would I know what you want to eat?
She isn't unless you say so.
Guessing doesn't count.
That's true.
If you don't say it,
it's hard for me to take your order.
Do you know how irritating you are
when you ask rhetorical questions?
Man, you're on the wrong channel!
I'll come back later.
You men are all alike,
You're born lying.
But the truth always comes out.
Did you know that?
What about you women?
You love playing quiz games!
You ask a ton of questions for everything.
Are there perfect answers for all of it?
I think sometimes it's better to keep some secrets
from each other.
I think you have too many secrets!
If I don't ask, you'd never tell me!
Then when you do say,
it comes out the last bit of toothpaste!
Even if it's just a little,
As long as it's true,
that's already an improvement!
My husband only talks rubbish!
Good morning! Good night! Let's eat! Let's fuck!
Toilet paper's out! Where are the toothpicks?
Why do you feel so insecure?
Bobo, we already spend every day together.
Since when do I have the time
or chance to fool you?
A sense of security goes both ways!
Don't you know that if I don't have it,
It's because you've never given it to me!
So what if you have no sense of security?
No condoms... that's a different story.
Sly women looking for security
pretend to have forgotten when it's safe.
That's how I got trapped.
I really didn't know!
A little late for that now!
I get that your ex was very bad to you.
But you don't have to treat me
the same way you treated him!
I didn't do anything!
You two are exactly the same.
At first, you're so good to me.
Then you change.
You men are all the same,
You all need supervision!
Take a gun and wipe us all out.
But then you'll piss and moan
about being lonely without us.
It's only because you men screw around
That we have to do these things.
You HK bitches are always
looking to start a fight!
Pretending all day to be so high class,
fantasizing that guys are
always trying to pick you up.
But they're just curious about you retards
Hah! You HK guys are so much better?
Say we're beautiful when you snag us,
Call us HK bitches when we reject you!
You're sick in the head!
We collect comics and figurines,
so you call us nerd-boys.
And grown women, covered in Hello Kitty and
Blythe dolls. So cute, right?
Weak.
Oh, you're so very mature,
You're just perverts.
The first thing you ask is for our WhatsApp info.
Second is what our bra size is.
And third is who's paying
for the room that night.
Aren't you men cheap?!
You're so superior, aren't you?
Your first question is, "Where do you live?"
Second question is, "What car do you drive?"
The third question is,
"Can we tape it and put it on the web?"
You think I'm an idiot?!
Speaking of taping,
When my husband and I were still dating,
We saw 3D Sex and Zen together.
Once we got married,
He wanted me to do all the sex scenes from it!
And in 4D!
Four, my ass.
You couldn't do any of it! Finish your food!
You call me Casanova when you want it,
Then call it a chore when you don't!
Shit! It's all up to you, isn't it?!
Why are you sticking your nose in?
Go wipe your tables!
I'll ask you one more time,
who was your lover back there?
Why do you have to call Wylie my lover?
Oh, so she has a name!
Wylie! Wylie! ...she sounds so delicate!
Why does she have to be your lover?
You done yet?
No! Why?! Does it break your heart?!
You dare claim you're not still together?
Waiter!
You finally know what you want?
I'm done.
Done with what? You haven't even ordered.
Oh, I see, he's done with you.
You still haven't said
what kind of cake we're making today.
You really want to know?
What's the big secret?
Give me your hand.
What are you up to?
I'm not sick or anything,
why take my temperature?
Because I want to know
the temperature of our love.
I'll let the chocolate melts at this temperature
and use it to make the cake.
This is my new creation, the "Cake of Memories".
Try it.
This cake holds all of our sweetest,
most tender memories inside.
I give it all to you.
Have you ever loved someone?
Have you ever hurt the one you loved?
What poor guy got this?
Hello?
Brother, we're fucked now. Hurry back to the shop.
What's up, sis?
Who did you piss off?
Someone's been after the whole family today.
You...
Oh, it's nothing.
It's just paint.
It's fine. It's alright.
How did this happen?
Nothing... I snuck out to take a piss,
and someone poured it all over me!
So did you see who did it?
You know male anatomy, right?
I was peeing, see...
so of course I was looking at myself.
How could I see who dumped it on me?
That's true.
Friend of yours?
Police.
What did he do this time?
He didn't do anything.
I'm here for his protection.
We're fucked now!
When I got up this morning,
I got calls from my chicks
in Shenzhen, Dongguan, Zhongshan,
All of them wanting to move in with me.
Think I'm in hot enough water?
You can't be so soared that you need protection.
How could they get here so quickly?
He's scared I might kill him,
so he called the police!
You bastard, one wasn't enough?
You had to get six more!
I'm going to kill you!
Run!
Stop running, bastard! I'm gonna kill you!
Where's your wife?
This morning, she slipped on a watermelon peel
and fell down the stairs!
She's still in hospital.
My baby sister and her husband?
Lucky went missing this morning.
They're combing the streets for him right now!
You know they treat Lucky like their own son!
They said they won't go home without him!
Go to hell!
Just tell me... did you piss someone off?
This can't go on.
You might lose your whole family!
I broke up with Bobo.
Boss! That girl is nuts.
She'll eventually come after us.
Boss, you better think about skinning out of here!
I'll help you buy the ferry ticket!
But I can't just leave you guys.
Get the fuck out of here!
What?
No, no, wait.
If you don't leave, we're fucked!
Oh...
Shit, bro!
She's just a woman! What are you worried about?
I'll call a couple Hunan guys to
knock her off and you'll be set!
Sir! I hope you're kidding!
Hello? Yes Yeah, okay.
I'll see you soon. Okay.
Bye.
Well, who was that?
It was Bobo.
That bitch still calls you?
I'm going to go meet her.
Bro, you can't be serious!
You might as well be committing suicide!
Wait, wait, wait. No way.
Shouldn't you go hide?
I can't hide this time.
Why?
She called me from my home phone.
Why is there blood all over you?!
It's the pattern.
Take a seat. Food will be ready soon.
I got a lot of food for you today.
They are all just for you.
I even bought the chocolate cake
that you and Fai both love.
What is that?
Roast suckling pig.
It took me all day.
There's one more thing. Be right back.
Lucky went missing this morning.
They're combing the streets for him right now...
What are you doing?
Nothing.
The pork you made came out so well,
I thought I'd take a picture
and put it on OpenRice.
Did you take it?
I got it.
Let's start!
Why aren't you eating? Feeling sick?
No.
Then eat up!
Enough playing!
Bobo.
So you hate me and poster-sniped me. Okay.
Why did you have to kill Lucky?
Well, that's still understandable.
Why did you have to roast him nice and crispy?
What? What "Lucky"?
What "Lucky"?
The Lucky that you butchered!
That's Lucky?
That's Lucky! It's very obvious.
Don't make wild accusations.
I'm wildly accusing you?
Then why is one of my sisters in hospital?
How did her husband get a bucket
of paint dumped on him?
And my second sister's husband?
Who exposed his four other mistresses?
It was all done by you.
I know you hate me.
If you hate me, take it out on me!
Why do you have to involve my family
and knock off Lucky?!
The poster thing was me, I'll admit it.
But your family stuff
and Lucky had nothing to do with me!
Bobo... You've usually got the nerve
to admit to anything.
What are you afraid of now?!
Lucky will never forgive you in heaven!
Why should I confess to something I didn't do?
Nothing to do with you? Lucky, take a look at her!
She's a murderer! There's your assassin!
Fine! You don't want it, right?
I'll throw it out!
Not before you show me the dog's head!
Let me throw it! That's not Lucky!
What do you mean not Lucky!
- Give back his head.
- But Lucky was bad!
Hold on, don't move!
Hello?
Bro? You're okay, right?
Your kid sister just called,
Saying they found Lucky in the garbage room.
What?! They found Lucky?
There's more...
My boss called me to say sorry!
The asshole hasn't paid up his debt,
The paint was for him,
but they got me when I snuck out!
But it's all good.
Since he's now promising a raise,
A promotion, and a bonus!
That good?
How about the other brother-in-law?
Hey bro!
I realized that
I forgot about that sixth mistress in Mongolia.
It's all cleared up now!
Sorry for bothering you!
How do you explain my other sister?
Well, you know me, always forgetting stuff.
But I recollect it now!
Actually, after I had eaten a watermelon,
I tossed the peel on the ground! It was me!
Shit!
So I wrongly blamed Bobo?
That's right! Bye-bye!
So you got it all strait.
That isn't Lucky!
Sorry.
I didn't think you wouldn't believe me!
No, wait.
You shouldn't have done that poster sniping!
That could ruin my reputation.
Well then I'm sorry.
Let's call it even.
Don't you love me anymore?
If not, say so and I'll leave!
I think there must be better way for us
to live in harmony!
What's that mean?
I just feel like you... smother me too much.
It really makes me feel suffocated.
I will think about it.
Really?
And also...
I'll never mention Wylie again.
It would be great if you could.
How about... I cut you a slice of the pork?
Yes, the shank please!
Let me give you a ride home.
What are you doing?
Oh, I forgot to tell you.
A couple days ago, I rented
a flat below you on the "A" side.
Next time, since we live so close,
you don't need to drive me home.
I could also take you to work,
then pick you up from work.
Isn't that sweet!
Bobo, why would you do that?
Everything I do is for you
It's my floor. I'll call you when I'm home.
So don't go to bed too soon. Bye-bye!
Long time no see!
How's your boyfriend? Married, yet?
Taro went hiking in the mountains
last month and got lost.
The rescue team gave up the search.
Weren't there other hikers with him?
They were found after one week,
but Taro was...
WOW, just like "Alive"...
Do you think they might have eaten him?
No, no, I mean, I was just wondering out loud...
Sorry.
This was found with his belongings.
What is it?
It's a receipt.
Before he left,
Taro bought a cake for me!
I want to taste it again.
Can you do that for me?
But this here receipt
It looks like scratch paper.
There's really know way
to read what it was I sold him.
But wait a minute.
You said you wanted to taste it again,
so you had it before.
So if you had, then why wouldn't you know
what kind it was?
That day, when they called me
saying he was missing,
I fainted right then and there.
When I regained consciousness,
I couldn't remember anything
from the past three days.
That kind of thing can happen?
I really want to help.
At our shop,
there are so many people
coming in and out every day...
It's really hard to keep track of
who bought what cake for whom.
Is there really no way?
Well, not necessarily.
Are you ready?
What do I have to be ready for?
To recall all your memories with Taro.
It's all up here.
Then, let's get started!
Oh, right, do you have anything
of Taro's with you?
I do.
Will this do?
Sure!
Give me your hand.
For this part, pretend that I am Taro.
Do your best to remember.
This is the temperature of your love with Taro.
Lucky it was a glove.
If it was underwear, that'd be f'd up!
Have a bite,
and you will recall your memories with Taro.
Really?
Maybe not,
But at least you have a cake to eat!
Try it.
Take it as a chance for yourself...
a chance for Taro.
Ching, I hope you will have tried the cake
before reading this,
so you might taste its sweetness,
before reality's bitterness.
You may find it better this way,
Because I have something important to tell you.
I have decided to part with you.
I'm heading back to Japan,
not only to explore the mountains,
but also to marry my first love.
She is the love of my life.
I finally understand
why when I learned he was missing
I suddenly lost my memory.
I just wanted deep down
to escape the knowledge
that before he even left,
he didn't love me anymore.
I'm so sorry.
That's not it.
I had to face this eventually.
Actually, I should thank you
for giving me the way to do it.
I should get going.
Bye!
Bye!
By the way, the cake was truly delicious.
Bye!
- Hi.
- Hi.
Hey.
Where are you?
On the way back.
That can't be.
Usually, the shop closes at 7:30, you're home by 8:30,
But now it's 8:40.
Well, there's traffic...
On your way home,
There're 7 lights, 3 streets, and 4 crosswalks!
And there's usually no traffic.
Haven't you ever heard about
a little thing called accidents?
Who was that on the security camera?
Who was what?
The one who said "Hi" to you!
How am I supposed to know?
If you don't know her, then why say "Hi"?
She said "Hi"
so I said "Hi" back.
You have to hit on every girl you meet?
A girl? That wasn't guy?
What are you doing here?
I have been waiting for you for ages.
Well, why did you call?
Well, why are you late?
Like I said, there was traffic.
Then, you could have taken a detour.
There wasn't traffic until I got there,
how would I take a detour?
But you can still detour once you're there.
Fine, tomorrow I'll take a detour.
Well, what if tomorrow the road is fixed?
Then I won't detour.
And tomorrow you'll have
another reason for being late.
I'm very busy.
How would I have the time
to find excuses for being late?
Being busy and lying are two different things.
Well so is whether or not you love someone.
What did you say?
Bobo, I think you should move.
Why?
Why did you have to move in downstairs?
Why are you downstairs every day
waiting for me like a security guard?
You said you wanted some space,
So I gave it to you!
Now you can live by yourself
while I can still see you everyday.
Why is that not okay?
You aren't giving me space,
You... you're monitoring me!
You men are so strange,
Changing your minds whenever you want!
- I can't take it!
- It's so hard to take, then forget it.
Forget what?
If you don't move, I will.
Well, where will you move?
Anywhere but upstairs from you!
What is it you want?!
Bobou.
Can we talk calmly for just one second?
Do you know why I became attracted to you?
Because I'm nice!
It's because whenever I look at you,
my vision becomes a blur.
This might be a sort of feeling of love.
You're blurry, so I want to look again.
Still out of focus, and I look closer.
Maybe that's why I
want to keep looking at you.
No matter what others say about you,
or how you treat me, I'm okay with it.
I really want to be with you.
Because intuition tells me that
this three-second blur
means Love!
Can you be a little clearer?
I see you very clearly now.
Maybe there is truth to the phrase,
"We meet in discord, yet part in understanding."
You want to breakup with me again, don't you?!
It's not again, Bobo!
Whenever we would argue, maybe we were just...
arguing for no reason or looking to split up
just so we could make up,
but this time is different.
What's so different?!
I've found a place to move.
We started off inside a lift.
Now we're breaking up in a lift.
It is something to remember us by.
I'm sorry, Bobo.
"After that day, they finally broke up for real."
"Two months later."
Once we've finished these five cakes,
It'll be about 5am
and we should be done for the night.
Okay?
Then what should we do for late-night?
That's right!
You can eat again already? What, are you pregnant?
Two months already.
- Aww, don't tell everyone!
- Tayler!
Hello!
I just got back from a trip,
and brought you all some souvenirs.
Really? You didn't have to!
It's so heavy, why don't we help you with that!
They're not very subtle.
How are you? Well?
Okay. Pretty good.
Pretty good, then OK!
Hey, look,
These gloves are so big, totally the wrong size.
Come on... for your boyfriend.
This isn't his style.
This one isn't for you guys.
- Who is it for then?
- This one is for you.?
I get something, too?
Boss,
look, the colors even match!
She knows your size!
Come on, try it on!
Not bad!
It's perfect!
Thank you!
Do you like it?
Yes.
Good, then we can finish work early.
Wait... I can't take it off...
Help him out.
Is it this button?
This gift was so nice of you,
you should let me treat you to dinner some time.
What kind of food do you like?
Excuse me, nurse?
Where is Orthopedics room no. 1?
Over there.
Thank you!
You're welcome.
Wylie.
Really... there's nothing about Tayler and me
that's worth talking about anymore.
Not worth talking about?
Then why was it that that night,
you left as soon as you saw us?
I was scared.
Scared of what?
Didn't you say you're his girlfriend?
Like you don't know he has issues?
What kind of issues could he have?
Tayler is just a really bizarre person.
He doesn't like having visitors,
yet he is worried that people can't find him.
He once tried calling me over a hundred timesl?
When he couldn't find me,
he called my friends, family, my boss,
Until they didn't want
to have anything to do with me.
He'd take my phone, check my WhatsApp,
And even stole my password
and went through my emaill?
Anyone who came near me,
he would investigate.
I even found him stalking me!?
The time we spent together
was no different from being in prison!
Being monitored 24-7.
By the end I had to move, change my phone...
I never expected that night
That I would run into you two!
Miss, couldn't it be that
because Tayler doesn't love you,
you would tell me all these things
to ruin our relationship?
Perhaps... He doesn't love you enough...
So he isn't like that with you.
Bobo!
Hi. Long time no see.
Same here.
How have you been?
Not as good as you!
Who was that girl back there?
Your new girlfriend?
"One hour ago"
Each time we've had dinner
you always eat so little.
Are you trying to lose weight?
I was just focused on our conversation.
She's just a regular friend, is all.
Friend? It doesn't look that way to me!
That Elevator Club you mentioned...
Is it always open to new members?
Yes, of course... Do you want to join?
Anyone is welcome.
I can help you register right now, even.
First let's see when you have
time to take me for a "lift"!
Any time is good!
Don't you always offer "lifts"
to girls you're after?
How did you know?
Oh, you must have followed me again!
Bobo, you really haven't changed.
If that's all, I'm out of here.
I saw Wylie the other day.
She told me a lot.
What did she say?
She told me... that actually we're both the same.
She is lying.
Or maybe you're the one lying.
Actually, we are meant for each other.
Bobo, you and I are not the same.
Why don't we start over again?
You're so smothering. How could we be the same?
Why don't we sit down and just talk?
Give me your money!
- Hey, man.
- Yes!
You've already taken all our stuff.
Why do you have to tie us up, too?
What luck, bumping into you again!
I'm not familiar with this area,
Do you know if there are any
border-crossing buses to Huanggang here?
Can't you be a little better at this crook thing?
Time after time, and not a bit of improvement.
Fuck you!
If I could do better, I'd have a desk job,
And not robbing you all the time.
You going to talk,
or do I have to cut her face up?
Don't!
No, don't! I'll talk, I'll talk...
Go!
- You get out onto that street.
- Out onto the street.
- Turn left.
- Turn left.
- Then turn right.
- Then turn right.
- Then go three blocks down.
- Three blocks down.
Minibus will be right there.
Ah, minibus. Good, I like taking minibus.
Get off at the third stop.
The third stop.
Then you'll be at Huanggang port.
Damn, is it that complicated?
I'm never working this area again.
I'm losing money just on bus fare.
I'm outta here!
Hey,paH
We're practically friends now,
How about you... just let us go?
Let you go? Let you go and call the cops on me?
The garbage lady can let you go tomorrow!
Besides, you two still haven't worked things out,
So keep at it! See ya!
A free-spirited wanderer like me
shall bear no burden!
This woman's handbag... you can have back.
Oh, shit! I forgot to speak bumpkin!
AW, hell with it!
You really told him which bus to take?
Yes... but not to Huanggang port.
To where, then?
Wanchai police station.
You laughing? Better off figuring
a way out of this.
Oh, it turns out you can see the sky from here, look.
So what?
What's today's date?
After midnight, the 15th of March.
Astronomers say that
there will be a special phenomenon today.
The asteroid Eros will make
its closest pass to Earth!
Legend has it that
if a couple witnesses it together,
they'll eventually find a way to be together.
After all this time, why didn't
I know you were into stronomy?
Because you only know
how to blame me for being clingy.
But...
it turns out that you and I
are just the same.
I told you Wylie was just talking crazy.
C)k, fine-.
Then you tell me.
What happened between you two?
Do I have to?
There you go again. You never say anything.
Well let me ask you, then...
Do you think I'm that kind of guy?
Then I'll ask you...
Do you still love me?
Well how about this...
If we happen to see Eros tonight,
We'll tell each other a secret, okay?
Okay. It's a deal.
Then it's settled.
Doesn't look like it's coming.
Looks like... we'll never get our answers.
Bobou.
Actually, I'm really happy to see you.
It's like there's something different about you.
Then can I see you again?
Sure.
Whenever you want.
Aren't you worried your girlfriend will mind?
Why do you never believe me?
Ma'am?
Ma'am? Could you please call the police?
Yes, we were robbed.
- Oh, okay.
- Thank you!
I had to face this eventually.
Actually, I should thank you
for giving me the way to do it.
I... I'm in the middle of a meeting.
Half an hour. I'll be outside the Newport Cinema.
That is all. Bye.
Didn't you say you were in a meeting?
Why are you here? Who is this?
And you said you were having
dinner with your mother.
Why are you sneaking around following me?
Who the hell are you? And why're you yelling at my guy?
Who am I? Why don't you ask your guy!
You think your lies fooled me?
While you were asleep this morning,
I looked through your WhatsApp!
The lesson you should here...
Once you're done reading it, delete it!
How many times have
I told you not to mess with my phone?
Can't you give me some privacy?
You don't have enough privacy?
It's enough for you to cheat on me!
It's really tiring the way you smother me.
I do it because I love you!
I'm tired of this. Just let me go, okay?
Hey!
Bobo!
Came quick as possible.
I just got here, too!
Have you bought the tickets?
- No...
- I'll buy them.
I don't want to watch a movie tonight.
What?
There's a place I want to go.
Is it gone?
Isn't this where "The Lonely Lift" was?
What are you doing here so late?
How can this be?
The building was demolished.
And the lift?
What lift? The building's already gone.
It's late, go on home.
Let's go...
Bobou.
The lift is gone, forget it.
I'll take you to another one.
How about a movie?
If not a movie, we can do dinner.
Or get a drink.
Why don't you go back and get married!
"9 a.m. this morning"
Hello?
Where are you?
Uh... at the shop.
Why is it so noisy over there?
Yeah, there are a lot of customers today.
What's up?
I'm going back to Taiwan to see my mom tomorrow!
Let's meet up tonight.
Tonight?
Tonight my schedule is a bit tight.
Then forget it.
No, no
Why don't you call me later, okay?
Okay, fine.
Actually, I really don't know what it is I want.
I knew you were getting married today,
But I couldn't let go...
I had to have you come out.
But when you actually came out,
I felt so guilty.
Felt I was so wrong.
Do you remember
I would always ask if you loved me or not?
It's because... I have no sense of security
In this word, "Love".
I don't want to be like this.
But maybe it's because the men I'd been with
were all so bad to me,
So I felt that all men were bastards.
I cling to you, check on you.
It's because I don't want to lose you!
You might think I don't know how to love someone,
but there's something you don't understand,
I have never had someone
actually and honestly love me.
How would I know how to?
I know that today will be the
last time ever seeing you.
And I know that you might
hate me forever,
but I really want to tell you...
I'd rather you hate and remember me,
Than love and forget me.
Thank you for hating me.
Don't worry,
This time, is the last I'll ever cling to you.
I'll let go of you.
Bobou.
Actually, I never once hated you.
May I invite you to the wedding?
Okay?
Don't get it in this colour.
Look, there are seven other colors,
Buy them all, then you can match anything.
I can agree with that.
And you don't need to get it yourself.
With home delivery, you don't even break a sweat.
I always say to my man,
One, two hundred grand, it's just loose change.
Honey, baby...
If I really lost a couple hundred grand
and you didn't say a word about it,
Don't you think that's a little cold-hearted?
If you piss me off again
I will swipe away another 20 grand!
Get out of here and find my brother. Go!
Easy now. Keep it around 10 grand, okay?
Rubles, of course!
Hey, that one's okay.
Had him.
Already?
Yeah, fresher is better.
Who invited her?
The groom... just... came back!
- Hurry up!
- We can start the wedding!
I heard the bride and groom
started a while ago and no one even knew.
I even heard that
the groom, you know, already got her pregnant!
What Really?
Otherwise, like, why would they marry so soon?
The groom is here!
Don't worry, dad.
Where did he go?
Hello? Anybody in there?
Then what do we do now? The groom is missing!
Just find him first!
Right! Hurry up, move!
Jeez, who says the groom has
to be in the men's toilet?
He could be in the women's. Morons.
Who would be as dirty a rat as you,
Cheating even on your wedding day.
Long time no see!
Why are you so late?
I rushed here as soon as I got off the plane.
Really?
Hey, did I miss anything?
No, it just started.
Aren't there a lot of surprises
and things you'd never have guessed?
But when I was at your shop today,
I saw the announcement...
Yee is my apprentice,
It's like my own daughter is getting married.
It's truly a wonderful occasion for me.
I called you just this morning.
Then forget it!
No, no
Why don't you call me later, okay?
Couldn't you guess?
There's no ring!
No, but I...
Sorry...
You can't even tell which is your wife?
You have got to be kidding!
You didn't really think I was coming to married?
Since, you're not here to get married,
Then why ask me to come?
There's something I want to tell you.
What?
Did you even know...
you're really hard to take.
I'm really not used to you being so controlling,
And your dislike of taking lifts,
and your calling me hundreds of times a day,
And especially you sneaking
around stalking me all the time!
Are you done?
You asked me to here
just to give these people a show, right?
I'm not done, yet!
What I can't get used to most
is not having you with me!
It's said...
that the best distance to the one you love,
is when you can't see them clearly.
What do you mean?
Don't worry.
This time, is the last I'll ever cling to you.
When I see you now, you're blurry again.
Do you think...
You truly understand me?
Wait here.
Try a bite.
No, thanks. I'm cutting back.
Just one bite.
I have made this cake especially for you.
Why is it cold?
Isn't his Cake of Memories supposed
to be warm inside?
Was it left out too long?
Shit! Did the boss screw it up this time?
You're wrong.
When most people are in love, they feel warm.
But sometimes there are exceptions.
Why are your hands so cold?
Born that way.
That cold?
Bobo, you really are strange.
But I love how strange you are.
Will you marry me?
"Three months later"
Baby, time for breakfast!
Okay!
- Good morning!
- Good morning!
So blurry. I must still love you.
So cute!
Do you know how I see you?
How is that?
When a woman looks at her man,
Outside of him, everything else is blurry.
Hello?
Oh, then I'll be right over.
Who was that?
The hospital.
I need to get changed. Take your time.
- Bye-bye!
- Bye!
Tayler is just a really bizarre person.
He doesn't like having visitors,
yet he is worried that people can't find him.
How's your reception?
Full bars.
What's up? Someone coming?
No. Just worried people can't reach me.
You don't want people to find you,
but are worried they can't reach you.
You're pretty strange, you know?
He'd take my phone,
check my WhatsApp.
Actually we're both the same.
I even found him stalking me!?
Actually, we are meant for each other.
The time we spent together
Was no different from being in prison!
Bobo, you and I are not the same.
You're so smothering. How could we be the same?
"Greater the love, greater the suffering."
"Greater the suffering, crazier one becomes."