Navy Boys (2006) Movie Script
Sweetheart... Hold on!
Wait... Wait... Wait!
I'm in a hurry.
What do you want?
Can you drop me off at the
Welfare Store?
All right.
Get into the jeep.
Hey.
What is it? Oops!
Nice trying.
We don't have time.
You're gonna need
a motorcycle taxi.
- What's wrong with it?
- Okay... I gotta go.
Bye, honey.
Ja! Go now and come back
to caress later.
Ja!
I wonder what oil it is.
You passed it already.
Have a nice day, ma'am.
- Thanks
- My pleasure.
Honey, you're still here?
Haven't finished yet?
Oh, you stud muffin!
Hey... Pra Craf... You still not
done yet?
If madam keeps squeezing,
I'll be done soon!
Hurry up, will you?
Sweetheart, you're back?
I've got to leave now.
Don't be shy.
We're married.
What a fishy smell!
Are we having fried fish today?
Pra Craf... Let's go!
Hurry up!
Can you drive faster?
We're getting late, you know?
This is already as fast
as it gets, sir.
By the way,
I have something to tell you.
What is it?
The brake is broken.
Excellent!
You deserve a higher salary
and a promotion.
What?
Is the brake broken?
Now you're on your own.
I got to get the hell out.
Colonel, we navy don't
abandon one another.
Oh yeah?
If I do that,
how can I survive?
Goddammit.
What are you doing?
Hey, move.
Why I have to be so damn
unlucky?
I don't get it...
Can it be worse than this?
My life is full of shit.
- Tired?
- No, sir!
- Willing to fight?
- Yes... Fight!
- Whoever blocks our way
- We'll not quit.
- Willing to fight?
- Yes... Fight!
- Hungry?
- No, sir!
- Scared?
- No, sir!
- Scared?
- No, sir!
Yike!
That's your false teeth, Madam.
I can do anything for our love.
Move! Get out of the way!
Piak, can you see
if my ass is still okay?
It's still intact so
I'm not broke ass.
We still have two minutes
to go, sir.
Can't you stop it?
How could I? The brake is broken.
Watch out!
Look! There 's a kid!
- Are you out of your mind?
- My baby!
Help!
The car just hit my baby.
Mommy... I'm right here.
Usually, he is a very
punctual man.
I'm sorry if I startle you, sir.
It's all right, colonel.
You're on the nose as usual, huh?
Yes, sir.
What the hell!
Lieutenant is not in...
Sergeant is out.
I'm alone... Everything
is under control, sir!
I'm sorry. The table is all broken.
Let's talk upstairs
This is information about
Meng and Mr. Yuri, the Japanese.
Weapons, illegal oil and
drug smuggling.
They are behind all of them.
Your job is to find the solid
evidence to take them to jail.
Why don't you let the police
do their job?
The Navy commands us
to do this mission secretly.
And who will be joining my team?
With me looking like this,
if anyone spot me, you can kick my ass.
Whatever I bet it always
comes out the opposite.
Easy, man. Perhaps a cigarette
may calm you down.
Don't take it too seriously.
I gotta to the mensroom.
Good luck to me!
Good luck to me!
How come my mustache
grows so fast?
Which bastard pasted
my picture over here?
The precious antique
of my father-in-law.
It costs a fortune, you know?
Wow! He was so nice
that he gave it to you.
Hell no!
He never gave me shit.
I stole it from him.
- No more bet!
- 500 grand.
I'm sorry...
I'm so sorry, sir.
That's fine.
Excuse me, do you have a lighter?
Jackpot!
Are you betting?
I pass.
I'm waiting for the next game.
Okay!
Let's put on the new bet.
Take it easy on us, will you?
Wow!
I beat you all.
Pay me up.
Today isn't really your day, is it?
Good hand means good money.
Oh shit! Anyone got busted?
Black jack again?
Here's your money.
Do you have a light?
All right. Here.
Where the hell are
all the chips gone?
Security! Come here!
What?
Get him!
He took all the chips.
You lost your bet
and you blame it on me?
Move!
Hey.
Look at me.
It's you again, Moo Warn.
The old debt is still on and you're
causing a new trouble?
I don't know.
I'm sure it's a misunderstanding.
What the hell is this?
Yeah,
I wonder what it was, too.
Stop acting as an innocent.
How much does he owe me?
The old debt is 300 grand, sir.
Cut off one of his arms!
No!
If you cut my hand...
How am I gonna clean my ass?
What do you want to say,
Moo Warn?
I have something for you.
Let go of him!
I'd like to offer my lighter.
It's worth a million.
Baloney! You're trying to trick
me with a bogus lighter?
No!
It's really genuine.
That's mine.
He crooked it from me.
Give me a break!
I just took it out from my pocket.
You're such a glib asshole.
Cut the other hand, too!
No!
Bastard!
It's you again!
How could you miss it?
Better get him and put
some bandages on.
Go!
Who are you?
Who are you?
It's none of your business.
Do you want your money
plus interest back?
A bonehead like you is
gonna pay off his debt?
Yes.
Who are you?
Where are you from?
Let go of him!
Today is your lucky day,
Moo Warn.
Let's go.
All right.
Let's get back to the game.
The whole world will see how
tough I am today.
Are you sure your
wimpy body can stand it?
I'll fight.
Oh, you're frightened?
Don't get on my damn nerve.
I'll fight.
Oh, You'll fight.
Yes.
By the way, what is he doing?
I'm a clock.
What time is it?
It's 9 p.m.
Tick-tock! Tick-tock.
Wait a second... it's now
9.30 p. M already.
Really?
I think I gotta move faster.
Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Tick-tock.
Hold on!
I'm with my customer.
Kra Pi, you bastard!
Are you in there?
Oh shit!
I told you not to talk about
it. You jinxed me.
Noon!
Yes, it's me.
You're a dead man!!!
Why do you keep
following me everywhere?
Where are you running to?
Bitch! You ever fucked
with my man?
I'm gonna rip your face into pieces!
Kra Pi, you son of a bitch. Die!!
Come back here!
Why the heck do you barge in here?
An old ass like you still
can bang the girls?
I'll give you a shot.
You nasty prick!
You want me to grab your thing?
No way.
It's not mine.
It's yours.
Oh... I see.
Kra Pi!
You're dead meat.
Oh my one-eyed willie!
Oh, you're good.
Oh, you're the best!
Do it again! Again!
Kra Pi!
Where are you running to?
Honey... I'm very exhausted.
Yes, I am, too.
But I'm still gonna fuck you up!
Don't go anywhere.
I got to!
Kra Pi, you mofo!
You pigs are all the same.
You damn cripple.
Here it is.
You will be dead.
Fuck you!
Please help me, sweety.
If you can't climb up here,
you'd better wack yourself at home.
Oh, pipsqueak! You too?
You... Die!
Gotcha!
Damn it!
He's flown the coop again.
Don't let me see you again... or else...
I'll chop your dick into pieces.
I just want to be your perfect man...
I keep reminding myself that
I'll take best care of you
What? Who are you
gonna take best care of?
Don't you dare come inside my house.
I wonder why you came back,
you bastard.
But the dreams of both of us...
Shut the fuck up, you mofo!
I thought you like Mike Piromporn.
Well, yeah.
I like Mike.
And do you like it?
What do you mean "it"?
Cause It's a club to hit your head!
Get the fuck out of my face.
Go find somewhere else to sleep.
How about a brothel?
Fuck off!
Take this!
Damn!
I got to sleep outside again.
What?
Colonel!
Your wife kick your ass out again?
Who said?
I just lock that
smelly-mouth bitch inside.
I'm sick of her whining and cursing.
You haven't changed a bit.
Well, I have a job
that needs your help.
Colonel... Look at me right now.
How can I help anyone?
It's me who should
ask for your help instead.
Well... You'll get ten million baht
for this job.
Ten million?!
Man!
You are so well equipped.
Your daddy must really love you.
Wow! Ton Horm,
you've changed quite a lot.
Not at all.
It's you, Colonel,
that has changed a lot.
Besides getting older...
Your lip is hanging down,
making me wanna kiss you.
Hey!
Stop... Stop... Stop it now.
Don't get me wrong.
You think
that I'm really gonna kiss you?
Your face is like a soaked
toilet paper. I can't take it.
I'm kidding.
Don't take it seriously
I just wonder if...
Your deep throat sucking skill...
...is still good?
Well, to be frank with you
Not only is it still perfect...
but it also has more
styles and is more sustainable.
All right.
That's more than enough.
Let me introduce your teammates.
Are they cute?
Check it out!
This is Moo Warn.
This is Khai Kem.
And this is Kra Pi,
the former bluejacket.
From afar,
I thought you're Tata Young.
- Actually the gay Teletubby.
- What?
Do your parents know
that you are a transvestite?
Well, you're a good looking man with
a shitty mouth.
You're crossing the line here.
Want me to bite your sissy neck?
I'll kick your ass.
Come on!
Colonel... I quit.
You've just come and
wanna leave now?
You know I don't like this queer.
Really?
Fine! If you wanna leave,
so get the hell out of here.
I'm leaving for sure,
you cocksucker!
Hold on!
A fag like you has no right
to beg me.
Begging you? Pew!
Take your rucksack.
Shit!
Why did you kick it?
It's full of explosives. What are
you gonna do if they blow up?
Blasting all of us!
Good. So you can't walk anymore,
you limp.
Oddball!
Look at him. Walking with his balls
swinging like a peeved child.
Don't come after me.
I'm not swallow my words.
Pew! You faggot!
Hello, colonel.
Hello, lieutenant.
Our team seems to have a problem.
Since one of them just quit.
He didn't want to join our team.
Why are you saying
something like that, colonel?
A soldier always tell the truth,
isn't he?
Pew!
Who the hell just walked out?
You're such a prick!
How could I drop out?
When the flowers are blooming.
When a navy drops an anchor...
we always do it all
the way through, right?
All the way to hell, I believe.
This is lieutenant Prig,
my assistant.
Really?
Will a beautiful
assistant like lieutenant.
Be able to cause any harm?
I forgot to tell you that
she is a martial art expert.
Whoever wanna test her
fighting skill...
...step up to the front.
Love and Peace, okay?
This is a special force called
"Num Prig Long Rouey"
Mr. Meng's residence.
Where are you calling from?
Nobody called you.
Lulu is speaking.
Who do you want to speak to?
My master?
Oh! It's burning.
It's burning.
Sir, from the senator.
Yes.
Don't worry, sir.
I'll transfer every single
penny to your account.
I guarantee I won't bring you
any trouble.
Absolutely!
Have a nice day.
The country is full of greedy asshole.
No wonder why it's going nowhere.
Eating all day...
Aren't you guys getting tired?
Haaaa!!!
Flying out of the water,
maybe he thinks he's a bird.
Sir, we've captured
the betrayer, Chol.
You're a backstabbing son of a bitch.
And see? You can't really
make it all the way through.
I'm sorry sir.
Please forgive me.
I'm so sorry.
Very good talker.
Sir, I don't smoke.
I quit smoking long time ago.
Smoking is bad for your health.
I don't want you to smoke a cigarette.
I want you to eat it!
Your name is Sai Chol, right?
It means you must be with the water.
Dump this piece of shit into the sea!
No forgiveness is given to a traitor.
Anyone calls Yuri for me.
Yuri... About the next
lot of shipment.
We need to call it off.
I just got a not very good news.
Whenever I'm ready,
I'll contact you again, okay?
Is it right here?
Here we are.
Off the boat.
Come on in.
I won't be staying
here with all of you.
Lieutenant Prig will be the one
who will take care of you.
Whatever you need,
just let her know.
If I need a pillow...
I can give you one.
If I need a mosquito net...
I told you that you can give you one.
What if I need a wife?
I can give... No! Ask him.
I don't know he still has energy
to play nookie?
I can't find one myself.
Damn sick of your smutty talk.
Come on, don't talk like that.
When we're together,
we must have a discipline.
Yes, sir.
I have three simple rules.
First... No alcohol.
Second... No gambling
And finally... No sex whatsoever.
Got it?
I'm out!
Where are you going,
you cock-craving fag?
What do you mean "crafting a flag"?
Try crafting a flag with me outside?
Come on.
Split up and take some rest.
I don't have time
for your nonsense.
Go pick the room you like.
There's only one bedroom.
- One bedroom?
- What?
Get out!
I have a bad joint.
Can I sleep on the bed?
You can say anything you like.
I'd like to use my right
as a high-ranked officer...
to sleep on this bed right now.
Your right is granted!
I don't give a damn about that.
I'm at the bed top,
I got the bed.
Let me ask you something?
Have you ever been taught
to be a gentleman?
You must serve the ladies.
Here we have two ladies.
Me and her.
So I got the bed.
You faggot!
You're not a woman.
- I'm a woman.
- Quiet! Quiet!
If you are still arguing,
I'd say that...
I'll be sleeping alone in this room.
All of you sleep outside.
Since this room has two beds.
One of the beds should
belong to one of us.
- Yes, I agree.
- Yes.
Well, I'll leave to all of you then.
You decide who's gonna
take this bed.
I think to be fair to everyone.
We should pick the winner
from a stick pick.
No!
That's nonsense.
You're a gambling freak...
You'll definitely win.
That's not fair.
Well, since we're all grown up.
We should sit down and talk...
What the reason you
suppose to sleep on the bed.
- I have a period.
- I have a bad joint.
- I have a period.
- I'm seasick.
If I sleep on the floor,
I'll bleed excessively.
We're friends. Why are we
bickering with each other?
We're supposed to stick together.
I don't ask you all to good to me.
I come here joining
our team because...
I love you all.
I don't know what the future
holds for me.
In the last battle, I knew that
I was the one who got shot.
A cripple like me can't run
as fast as you.
I'll be the first who gets killed.
And I apologize to all of you that.
I have been hiding
this secret from you.
The truth is I was not born
in a high-class family.
My mom was a street hooker.
My daddy was a pimp.
All my life,
I slept on a cheap canvas bed.
I've never slept on a nice
bed like this one.
You guys can have it if you like.
I love you all, my friends.
No! That's enough.
That's enough.
I'll sleep outside.
You deserve to sleep here. I'll go.
No... You'd better sleep here.
With all you have been through...
You still want me to sleep
on this bed.
This bed is for you.
Have you ever heard a story
of my grandpa?
He molested me while I was slept.
What a sucky life I have!
No. No.
Sleeping on the bed...
But have to stay out of the room.
Think it's comfy, right?
Perhaps the weather
up there is too good...
Yeah... It's so good sleeping here.
But it'll be much better if
I can sleep inside.
Who knows?
Tonight I might sneak in and have
a little fun with the lieutenant.
If you go, I'll go, too.
If I were on her bed,
I'd transform myself into a rabbit.
You Asshole!
I wanna join too.
What are you transforming to?
I'll be a turtle.
Why turtle?
Because a turtle reaches the finish
line before a rabbit!
Do you think we're gonna
get this job done?
I don't really think so.
Why not?
We can do it, man.
Well, Oddball... what are you gonna
do with your money?
Could you get the
cord on the fridge for me?
I don't know where it is.
It's on the fridge, Oam.
I know you're too lazy.
All right, stay here!
Don't mess around here.
I'll go get the cord.
Ouch!
Oam! I told you.
Don't mess around.
If I get the money, I'll get...
For me...
How about you?
Well, I...
Nothing.
I'm so tired. Good night!
Don't they have any chick
nurses here at all?
You're such a nasty fink!
Moo Warn.
Go to the examination room.
Lieutenant... could you please
come with me?
I'm... I'm kind of scared.
No, I can't.
I can't believe you still using the
"scared" trick.
Oh... some miserable cripple...
Not only got a lame leg
but also a dopey joke, huh?
Son of a bitch!
Could you put your damn foot down?
Aham!
Are you really an oddball?
Haven't taken a shower for days.
It smells odd.
I mean your name.
Oh I see...
My name is Tanong Kumpanad,
the former navy.
From your body check-up,
you're healthy.
Ouch!
What's happening?
It hurts right here.
Yeah... right here.
It hurt right here first...
and then it moved down here.
All right.
Why don't you lie down?
Like this?
No.
Please lie down first.
Yeah... lie down and relax.
Hold on.
Let me give you some massage.
What are you checking here?
I'm checking your heart.
But you're touching
my hard nipple.
Please take a deep breath.
Inhale is you and exhale is also you.
Inhale is you and exhale is also you.
Done!
Wow... Me too!
Fantastic! Your hand is soft
like a heavenly feather.
Wow! It really helps soothe
my aching muscles.
Very nice indeed!
You can massage it a little harder
if you like.
Why do you stop it?
Keep up with your stroke...
It's coming along so good.
I think I'll do a new position.
New position... really?
It must be really thrilling.
You can do harder...
go deep to the right target.
That's what I thought!
Why are you beating me?
Why?
Nurse.
Yes.
Can I ask you one question?
You can ask me as many
as you want.
Are you sure?
Yes. Go ahead.
There's nobody here.
Well... about sexual surgery...
I see. You have to pass
the body check-up first.
If I pass the check up
and I can do it right away?
Yes, right away as you wish.
It's all right.
Are you afraid of a needle?
Afraid of Needle?
How could you ask me that?
My parents are doctors,
you know?
Even my grandfather is a doctor.
You mean a medical doctor?
Nope. A voice doctor!
Oh god!
It's magnificent.
Well, I think... you should rethink
about having it cut.
All of you have to go
get your outfits...
and meet Colonel Kung
at the conference room.
Where should I go get the stuff?
You'll know it soon.
It sounds very private.
I wonder what is so attractive
about the private parts.
If you wanna know,
just ask the lieutenant to see it.
No problem!
You wanna see my privates?
You can grab and penetrate
as deep as you want.
Yuck! I don't wanna even
glimpse at your ugly dipstick.
What hospital did you have
your facelift?
You have hair over here!
I'm sure your eyes will pop up
and your nose will hang down soon.
- Are you done barking?
- Yes.
Turn your face over here.
Bastard! Go!
Bitch!
This is the picture of Meng,
the mafia of illegal weapons
drugs and all kinds of contraband.
He has networks
throughout the country.
Every time when we try
to place them under arrest.
We always get the lackeys
but never the big boss.
Because he knows several
influential figures.
This is Mr. Yuri, a Japanese guy.
He is Meng's business partner.
And right now he is spending
his vacation in Thailand.
It's your job to find
the evidence of their felony.
One of his men confessed
that he'd videotaped it.
But he didn't know where
Meng has kept it.
If this mission is accomplished,
you'll be rewarded as you know.
But if you flunk it,
your identity will be vanished.
How are we gonna find them?
Don't worry.
Lieutenant Prig will explain
to you all in detail.
Please, Lieutenant.
Here is his house in Bangkok.
And his beach resort.
Whenever Yuri visits Thailand,
he will stay here.
We used to take charge
while they're transferring goods.
But when we arrived,
they always slipped away.
That means...
They must be hiding
in a secret island somewhere.
That's why we formed
our own secret unit.
And find talented members
for a specific task.
Our team have to put
our lives on the line.
And as you all are former navies.
You must know
that if we are to die
we all are gonna die together.
Thank you.
What if I can hack into
his information?
Then our mission will
complete faster.
Hey! Ton Horm.
You still haven't told us
about your dream.
If the job is done,
what will you do with the money?
How am I gonna spend the money?
Actually my dream
is not as big as all of yours.
It's just a little dream.
I...
I'd like to have my own cabaret.
A cabaret show?
Judge from what I've just seen.
Your moves are not bad at all.
I thought
I was watching a real show.
I'm sure your dream
won't be too far away.
This sailor will see to it that
your dream comes true.
Go for it, Ton Horm!
Can you please turn
on the music for me?
Turn on the music?
For you,
Ton Horm... Certainly!
Why the hell did you do that for?
Why are you turning on the music?
What does it has to do with you?
I don't like loud music,
so I turn it off. So what?
I'll let you two alone then.
So what? I can't shit
because your music is too loud.
People are trying to sleep.
If you wanna sleep,
go find other place.
This damn space is for everyone.
Oh yeah?
We come here for a battle!
And why the hell do you dress
up like this?
Can you please turn on the
music for me?
I'm trying to sleep
but your music is damn loud.
I wanna listen to it!
Getting on my nerve?
Turn off!
I wanna dance!
You wanna play rough, huh?
How about this?
You're way over the line.
Oh? You think that rough?
I can show something rougher
than that. Look!
Braa! Braa!
Son of a bitch!
Stop it!
Stop. Stop!
- What's going on?
- Take it easy... both of you.
If you don't stop,
the mission is cancelled!
Take it easy... both of you.
Let me go!
You'd better watch your ass.
Lieutenant! I'm not gonna share
the same room with them.
As if I care!
I have always on alert.
What the hell is going on?
Don't you see he's turning
the music on so loud.
I'm going to bed.
And why don't you sleep
with the music?
Duh.
Lieutenant,
did you hear something?
Yes.
What is it?
I'm not sure.
But I can feel something
smelling not right.
I think we might be in an
insecure situation.
If something happens,
remember that I'm right outside.
- Okay! Thanks a lot.
- You're welcome.
Why do you tight us together?
What do you want?
Hey!
What are you doing?
What are you trying to do?
There is nothing you want.
What do they want from us?
I told you something wasn't right.
What should we do?
Let me find a knife to untie us.
How the hell did they tie the knot?
Hey, turn your face away from me.
This side?
No! Other side.
All right.
But this knot is very tight.
We have to do something.
Hey! Can't you just be still?
It hurts me.
- Kra Pi... Please help us!
- Moo Warn... Lieutenant!
What are you doing here?
Why are you here so early?
What did you say?
I told him to untie us... Quickly!
What are you playing here?
Without your help,
we'll be in trouble.
I'll call Colonel Kung
to inform him.
Come on.
Hey... Can I do it one more time?
I wanna do it again.
No... Hurry up!
Change your clothes.
My life is never this happy before.
Are you all right, lieutenant?
I'm okay.
But they took our stuff.
In case they came back,
let me escort you here.
That's okay.
I'm fine.
Please let me escort you here.
No. You can go.
Let me be with you, please.
No! Get out!
Lieutenant...
Again?
Why do you have to tie me with him?
Who the heck are you?
You freaks!
Could you turn your face
the other way?
Lieutenant.
Do you care for a dance with me?
Are you nuts? How could you be
in a mood for dancing?
I've been in a mood since
they started tying us.
What?
Hey... Hold this.
Wow... You're getting
heated too, huh?
When it's my turn, you get
in there and tie me up tightly.
Very tight like this, got it?
Let my face be on her breast.
I'll tie you up and you do the rest,
okay?
What is that noise?
Oddball! Come and untie us.
What is going on here?
- Two thugs came from nowhere...
- Let me release you first.
Let me release you first.
Hey!
Just right on time, huh?
Kra Pi!
I'm trying to untie you here.
What happened?
Did you hear me?
What happened?
Thieves... They just attacked us.
What?
Thieves in our place?
Yes.
They took away some stuff.
Holy crap!
I'm gonna go check on Moo Warn.
This sucks!
How did they guard the house.
Lieutenant, wait here!
I'll go get those sons of a bitch!
Please, don't hurt me.
Please... I beg you.
Wait a minute! Again?
Yes, do it... in a hurry.
Oddball!
You asshole!
What the fuck are you up to?
We agreed that
I'll be locked up with her!
You're trying to stab
me the back, huh?
- What?
- I'm not gonna be a sour loser.
Wanna threaten me
with that toy gun?
What is it all about?
Moo Warn.
Kra Pi
How on earth could
you do this to me?
Whose idea was it?
He was the first one
who came up with the idea.
He is the one... No
you... Not it's you!
- You're the one...
- It's you. All your idea.
All of you on this?
Who is behind me?
It's me, Oddball. Your daddy.
I see.
Good.
What the fuck!
Nasty faggot! Fuck you!
What the hell have you been eating?
Stinky fart, you bitch.
- What the fuck is that?
- Yuck!
Pew!
Baywatch!
He really ruins my drive sex!
Sex drive!
Time up!
Get out of the pool.
Can we stay longer?
What do you think?
They all look like little fish.
So tiny that
I can't believe they are usable.
If three of ours combined,
they will surely blow up your ass.
You fag! You'll never get a piece
of my meat in your ass.
Don't whine when you get hungry.
Here...
I don't wanna be too mean to you.
Shit! My pants!
Crap! That's my pants, too.
And that's mine.
Give it back to me.
I'll give you one.
Hey! I want my pants.
Give me my pants!
You psychotic fag... Give it to me.
You stupid queer... how could
you give us only one pants.
Give us all of them.
You stinky-ass faggot.
You water buffalo.
He's such a nerve-wracking homo!
One day I'll surely bomb
his sissy ass.
Oddball, you're the biggest.
You go get that pants
and then go get our towels.
All right.
Well, not a good idea.
There are people around here.
I can't do it.
My ding dong is waking up.
You Dick smack! How could you get
a boner during this time?
Look at mine... it's look like
a roasted fish!
I got an idea. Let's get to
the restroom on that side.
It's closer.
You think so?
- Yeah!
- Let's go.
How was your traitor fellow?
He got dumped into
the sea to feed the sharks.
I don't know how much
he'd spilled the bean?
He's just a small piece of crap.
He knew nothing.
Shall we go outside, Yuri?
Feeling hot? Here, try this.
You'll be cooled down soon.
Or perhaps get even hotter!
Girls, you gotta
treat Mr. Yuri more attentively.
He used to eat only
Japanese raw fish.
Today he wanna try some
Thai juicy fish.
What do you think, Yuri?
I guarantee you won't find anything
like this in Yokohama.
All right!
All they do is making
fucking tires.
Your girls are amazing.
Aren't you gonna send them
to feed the sharks?
Now only two left. If both are dead,
who will serve you whiskey then?
The Middle East customer has
ordered the weapons. Urgently!
Why the hell they need
the weapons in such a hurry?
They blow up each
other ass every day.
But they pay us really well.
I know that.
But I just got on black-listed.
I need to do things
cautiously now.
I thought you have quite
a strong backer.
Well, he can get flabby
from time to time.
Don't worry...
I got a very bright idea.
Lieutenant.
You are always in my heart.
We belong to each other.
How is it going?
All set!
Who the hell has just shit
around here?
Holy Shit!
Yuck!
Who the fuck put
this shit in my hand?
Crap! And pee too!
What filthy scuzz put these shit
and pee on me? Fucker!
I think it comes from
that fag Ton Horm.
Look! I got the evidence.
He's such an idiot.
This is his bag.
Yeah I'm gonna throw it away.
It's damn heavy.
What the hell are you doing?
I'm trying to sleep here!
That's what you get for
being an asshole!
Where is the sugar?
Where is the sugar?
Can't you see it?
Here! You can have however
much you like.
That is pepper.
It says "pepper" right here.
Moron!!
Who told you it's pepper?
I wrote "pepper" to fool stupid ants.
But it's sugar in there.
If those ants know
it's sugar in there
they'd come and eat it all.
Knucklehead!
Oh, mother of boobs!
Come on, you cripple!
Get down! Get down!
Get ready.
5... 4...
3... 2... 1
Down! Down!
Boom! Boom! Boom!
What's the hell wrong with you?
Yeah, I wonder.
Where is the bomb?
I forgot to press the button.
You Cripple.
See? I still have what it takes!
How is your team doing, colonel?
All ready! Anytime, sir!
Excellent!
Our intelligence
has informed that.
Yuri and Meng are hiding
in their beach resort.
And the American
agent told us that.
The target is now in our seaboard
to pick up their stuff.
But we still can't figure out where
the island they are hiding is.
Here is the CD that contains
information about all potential islands
You should give it to Kra Pi,
the sailor in your team.
Probably he can figure it out.
If you find out their whereabouts,
notify me at once.
Yes, sir.
Mr. Yuri,
our boss wants to see you.
This way, please.
I think there is some kind of a party.
Yes, I think so. Seems like
hundreds of people in there.
- Hey! Stop.
- Shit!
What are you doing here?
We're fishing, sir.
Fishing? Don't you know
that it's restricted area?
It is this punk ass who hired me here.
He told me to come find
some pieces of shit.
What? You son of a bitch!
It's your fault.
What are you blaming me for?
It's because of you.
Are you mad at me because
I ate your food?
Such an asshole!
The colonel is so fuckin' punctual.
This bastard Meng
is a real smutty cock head.
Look! They're all queers.
What kind of party is that?
That's fuckin' sick!
Good evening, everyone.
I'm so very happy tonight.
Because I can come out of a closet
I've been hiding...
...like all of you here.
I hope you all will have a great time.
Only tonight...
that you can do whatever
you want... everything whatsoever!
Cause tonight belongs
exclusively to us.
No bimbos allowed!
Moo Warn and Prig,
go to Meng's office...
and hack the information
from his computer.
- I know you like it, huh?
- Yes.
- You wanna be here?
- Yes.
Then you blend into his party.
Cool! A fag should get his shit
together with other fags.
Let's rock the queer's world.
I'm gonna kick the shit out of you.
Can you two stop fighting?
You come here!
You, the cripple, come with me.
Yes, sir.
What the fuck is that for?
You kicked my ass?
Take it easy!
But he just kicked me.
Why do you bring a liquor?
We're working.
I want it to calm me down.
Bullshit! Ditch it!
No! No!
Come on! Colonel,
don't throw a good stuff away.
I'll keep it. I like the bottle,
it's kind of beautiful.
Same here.
Not a chance.
Go! Do your work.
When finished,
get back to the meeting place, okay?
What should we do now?
Come on.
Hold on please... Oh!
...Good evening.
Good evening.
I've been a big fan of your work.
Let me help you.
Very lovely shoes.
Let me help.
Your hair is so beautiful.
What are you doing here,
sweetheart?
I'm looking for a cigar to smoke.
Do you have one for me?
I see.
You wanna smoke a cigar?
Yeah... honey.
Well, I have one for you.
It's a humongous one!
I'd love it.
Let's count to three.
Okay... one... and two... and three...
Mama!
The singer of the next song
is having a diarrhea.
What should we do?
Fuck! It's my bad day indeed.
I've lost my bet.
And this Baywatch has
her ass full of shit.
How can I find a replacement now?
I can do it.
Keep your hideous face
for a freak show only!
Grab the dress!
Fuck!
My face looks like a superstar.
How could I be a queer?
Fuck you! Superstar?
I think it should be a sickening star.
Whatever... Help me think
who should I be?
I can't play any instruments.
It's really not my cup of tea.
What should I be?
A waiter!
A waiter?
Cool! Now I can moisten
my tonsils with some booze.
Damn!
There're so many people here.
That means they must have
a big lot of weapons.
Hey... You wanna dispose
your bombs right now?
Oops!
What the hell!
Wow! Marilyn Monroe!
I can't believe
you can be such a stout queen.
Wow!
Isn't this some kind of shooting device
of the aborigines?
I saw it in the movie
but never blow a real thing.
That thing you're blowing
is actually a...
Cucumber calls cow-pea.
We've found Meng's office.
Hah? Okay. Okay. Good!
Get in there!
Is everything all right?
Did you get the stuff out?
Everything is all set.
Great.
Hmm... Where the heck
is my laptop?
Can't you remember
where you put it, sir?
It's in your bedroom upstairs.
If I can't find it,
you gotta be responsible.
Cucumber!
Meng is going into that room.
Is it there?
Let's go find it. Is it in here?
I remember it was here
the last time I used it.
Lulu... Go look in that room.
Me again?
How the hell could it disappear?
What the fuck is that noise?
Motherfuckers!
Are you trying to kill me
with a damn snake?
Sir... I found it.
You found my laptop?
Where is it?
I found... found...
a gec... a gec... a gecko!
You're scared of a gecko
but stepped on my one-eyed snake.
I'm fucking sick with you,
you idiot.
Look!
What is it?
How the hell could it be right here?
How come I didn't see it earlier?
It's been here for
a quite a while already.
Go! You get over there alone first.
If I go by myself,
how about you?
I'll be standing right here.
How come we're not
going together?
If I go, can you still call
it going there alone?
Very profound indeed!
Go! You stupid.
Man! I thought I've lost it.
Shit! That bastard is coming.
Where the hell should I hide?
Why are you always
in my fucking way?
What a grumpy old man you are!
Look around.
Do you see anything suspicious?
Nothing.
I saw only a gecko.
Over there.
Lulu!
Yes?
Light me a cigarette.
Don't you see it's still nothing here.
How about this?
Is it okay now?
Do you want some more?
Bitch! It's lit long time ago.
Can't you see it?
You burned the heck
out of my cigarette.
Where are you going now?
Damn it!
Only one cigarette left...
We can buy a new packet.
How many times have I told you?
Don't order that stupid
Marlboro brand.
Why not?
It stinks like a shitty asshole.
Wanna quench it again?
Maybe it'll smell like a chocolate.
Thanks a lot... I don't have to remove
my hernia now.
What are you doing with my costumes?
I'm a replacement singer.
Great! Go get dressed.
Hurry up!
Fuck!
No way! I'm just kidding.
Good luck!
Get lose or else
I'll tramp over your hag face.
I'm tired of digging out shit.
That's it. I quit.
Nope
Hey! What are you standing for?
Come here!
No way! Bye Bye!
Piak! Go get him!
- I'm not taking a shit.
- Come on.
There's nothing in there.
I think he needs a vacuum cleaner.
Sir, there are intruders in here.
Who?
Don't know, sir.
How the hell you don't know
who they are?
They must be the police.
Are you all right, colonel?
Who are you?
It's me, Prig.
And you?
I'm Moo Warn, remember?
What have you been doing?
Why are you black like a nigger?
They burned my ass with a candle
and kindled me with a cigarette.
They are all sick freaks!
What happened to you?
What's going on with you?
I went to the wrong room.
They thought
I was hiding drugs in my ass.
And damn!
They just dig everything out of there.
Did they find anything?
They found some shit!
Some drugs?
No... My goddamn shit!
And what should we do next?
Well, where is the evidence?
Where is it?
Colonel, well we almost
got the evidence.
Damn you! You didn't get it.
I got my asshole burned for nothing.
We're going to get the evidence.
Follow me... I'll take you there.
Colonel, are you okay?
How far do we still have to go?
What's wrong with you, Ton Horm?
Don't you see your daddy is coming?
Check it thoroughly!
Go ahead!
Hack some information from it.
Yes, sir.
Hey!
You go watch the entrance.
Why should I?
Cause you've never seen it. Moron!
Okay. Take me there.
Not fun anymore.
Damn!
We'd better hide.
Call the colonel.
Copy!
Colonel Kung?
I think they know that we're here.
Ton Horm!
Something is up with Ton Horm.
Let's go see him.
I don't give that fag a damn.
That's good evidence.
Here it is!
What next?
You'd better go upstairs
to be with the rest of us.
While I sidetrack them
to go this way.
Okay. Good idea.
Okay, see you there.
That really wakes
me up from the jag. Go!
Get them!
What are you running away from?
Meng's bodyguards.
They're shooting behind me.
By the way,
did you get the evidence?
Of course!
Colonel.
Where is Ton Horm?
He came here ahead of me.
Really?
Let's go!
Hey! Freeze!
Where are you guys going?
Why do I have to tell you idiots?
This way. Come on!
It seems like they're taking
the whole troop here.
Yuri... Look! They've caught us
some screwy freaks.
Hey! Who the hell are you?
I'm not telling you a fuck.
At least we're not cops.
How many of you are here?
If I tell you there're six of us,
are you gonna believe me?
And why did you tell him?
Well, I'm kind of an upright person.
They're not gonna believe us.
They'll know about our plan.
You think I'm a fucking dimwit?
Look at how fucking goofy
you're dressing.
Like you are so pretty, faggot!
Just finish them off!
It's too easy, Yuri.
I have a much better idea.
No! My God! Look at this red outfit.
Why? What's wrong with it?
It's so dowdy! Very drab!
How could you come up
with this color?
Lulu... Try the white one.
That bitch in white
looks like a real woman.
Yeah... I think so.
Well, you've got to prove
it for yourself.
This is a real meat! Try it!
Yes. I'm a man.
See? Both of us are men.
But that bimbo in white
has no chest hair at all.
I shaved it... shaved it and... shaved it!
She's phony.
Take her to our boss. Now!
Wait! Wait!
Let's go. Now!
- We can explain it.
- Go!
Take her to the boss.
What's the matter with you?
I got a stomachache.
Oh... my belly really hurt!
Stop!
Come on in! I'm ready.
Hold on, everyone.
What is it?
How about sipping it?
Isn't that my sneaky pete?
Have a sip.
It'll really cheer you up.
You know me the best, man!
Come on! I'm ready.
You cracked squirrel,
are you ready?
The first question is...
It's an octopus.
How about that!
The three-chef canned fish...
...from a 100% genuine sardines...
...fresh fish imported
from New Zealand.
For a delicious dish,
add with the vermicelli.
That's enough!
And what the fuck is this fish?
- Dag fish!
- No!
- Some fish!
- No!
- Jom fish!
- Wrong!
- Salmon
- No!
- Paprika!
- Hell no!
Damn! What a fucking stinky fish!
That's against the rule.
Can I have a helper option?
What option do you want?
I wanna lick it.
You got your option right now!
Oh Shit!
Hell No!
You son of a bitch!
Who told you to throw up
on my goddamn nails?
Just right on the target!
The answer is Toe fish!
This idiot can't answer the question.
He's a nitwit.
All of your friends can't live either.
Kill them all.
What does it has to do with us?
Just kill him!
Help me... Please!
You queer hag! Let my friends go,
or this bitch is dead.
Don't you see now that
we're on top of your game.
Okay you dingy bat,
you got your hostage, right?
You don't have a hostage anymore.
What? She's dead...
You're on top of my game, aren't you?
Not quite.
My turn will be next to the colonel.
Why do you have to be next to me?
How about this?
Since I'm dying anyway,
can I ask for one last thing?
Tell me what you want.
You're such a refined man.
Can I have a sip of a whiskey?
Take whatever sip you want.
Besides being a wicked fag,
you are also very kind.
All right.
For me to die,
it has to be with dignity.
It has to have a loud noise.
Loud noise!
Thank you for saving me,
Ton Horm.
Ton Horm.
Ton Horm, are you all right?
Wake up! Don't die.
Sacrifice is truly a dignified conduct.
Especially when one sacrifices
for the country
which is what all brave
soldiers should do.
And the sacrifice that
you've made for this mission
is definitely the most
honorable to us all.
On behalf of the Royal Thai Navy...
we'd like to imprint your name
in this honorary medal
to commemorate the great
thing you had done for us.
We'll make the dream
of Ton Horm comes true.
If you really love me, really love me...
you gotta ask my mom
Love me, you gotta ask my mom.
See what she says
If you really love me, really love me...
don't be afraid of anyone
Love me, just follow me.
We'll run away together
If you really love me,
really love me... you gotta ask my dad.
Love me, you gotta ask my dad.
See what he says
If you really love me, really love me...
don't be afraid of anyone
Love me, your parents will see,
and we'll flee together
Oho God! Oh God!
I'm a handsome man...
a real handsome man
I'm not joking. It's so true
I know you fall for me
You're flirting me
with your sexy eyes
Your smile blows my mind away
I smile to you without delay
My heart is pounding
sound like Oh-Oh!
Oh-Oh! Oh God! It's sad.
I'm just one crazy man
Oh-oh! Somebody
is keeping looking at me...
I feel shy but don't know
where to hide
Aya... Ya-Ya... Ooh-Arr.
I'm a human like you guys.
Also have mouth, eyebrow,
chin and eyes
My face is like ordinary people
Aya... Ya... Ya Ooh... Arr...
Only my heart is different
For me... I like to eat cute men...
Dark-tall-handsome, oh my dear!
Is there anyone left around here?
Yeah... Ahah... Yo... Yo... Yeah
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
On a lonely night,
come sing a Ohu song
Oh honey, I'm bawling like
competing with a dog
Where are you? Yahoo!
How come you're not coming to me?
Oh wah! Oh lala!
My body is gradual declining
Oh tonight I miss you,
my Joo-Jood-Joo
I don't know where you are,
whom you're with
Why not coming to me?
I see you I'll spank you
You break the heart of a guy
named Choo-Chood-Choo
We all have a dream.
Each with different dreams
No matter how hard and how painful,
we'll still stand
We come from different paths
but now we all are here
to share the same dream,
same happiness and sorrow
Friends won't and
never will abandon friends
cause you and me love each
other too much to understand
Whoever missed their step,
we all will help them stand up
No matter how far is the dream,
we'll go there together
Friends won't and
never will abandon friends
cause you and me love each other
too much to understand
Whoever missed their step,
we all will help them stand up
No matter how far is the dream,
we're in the same boat to get there
If it's my dream,
I will... bang... bang... bang!
I'm not a hookworm.
I have a wormkiller Benda 500.
One pill one time
I was there,
the colonel got shot at his right ball.
When flied to hit the bunker,
it didn't get crumbled at once.
It bounced into
the air around 15 feet.
And then hit my bunker hole
and broke into pieces.
Testis ball or a tennis ball?
I'm serious.
I wish you saw it.
Let's look at it in the computer.
No need. I can tell you,
the whole was torn apart.
What the hell are you looking at?
Lieutenant, something is wrong
in my eyes. I can't see.
What's wrong?
It's love that makes me blind.
Girls, today is my birthday.
Happy birthday to you.
Lieutenant,
I've already got a wife.
My wife bans me from the brothel
but I still go there.
She bans me from drinking alcohol
but I still get drunk.
I'll quit it all,
If you are OK to be my wife.
Take that!
- I got her at my feet.
- Really? Wow!
And then I bow down.
Wait... Wait... Wait!
I'm in a hurry.
What do you want?
Can you drop me off at the
Welfare Store?
All right.
Get into the jeep.
Hey.
What is it? Oops!
Nice trying.
We don't have time.
You're gonna need
a motorcycle taxi.
- What's wrong with it?
- Okay... I gotta go.
Bye, honey.
Ja! Go now and come back
to caress later.
Ja!
I wonder what oil it is.
You passed it already.
Have a nice day, ma'am.
- Thanks
- My pleasure.
Honey, you're still here?
Haven't finished yet?
Oh, you stud muffin!
Hey... Pra Craf... You still not
done yet?
If madam keeps squeezing,
I'll be done soon!
Hurry up, will you?
Sweetheart, you're back?
I've got to leave now.
Don't be shy.
We're married.
What a fishy smell!
Are we having fried fish today?
Pra Craf... Let's go!
Hurry up!
Can you drive faster?
We're getting late, you know?
This is already as fast
as it gets, sir.
By the way,
I have something to tell you.
What is it?
The brake is broken.
Excellent!
You deserve a higher salary
and a promotion.
What?
Is the brake broken?
Now you're on your own.
I got to get the hell out.
Colonel, we navy don't
abandon one another.
Oh yeah?
If I do that,
how can I survive?
Goddammit.
What are you doing?
Hey, move.
Why I have to be so damn
unlucky?
I don't get it...
Can it be worse than this?
My life is full of shit.
- Tired?
- No, sir!
- Willing to fight?
- Yes... Fight!
- Whoever blocks our way
- We'll not quit.
- Willing to fight?
- Yes... Fight!
- Hungry?
- No, sir!
- Scared?
- No, sir!
- Scared?
- No, sir!
Yike!
That's your false teeth, Madam.
I can do anything for our love.
Move! Get out of the way!
Piak, can you see
if my ass is still okay?
It's still intact so
I'm not broke ass.
We still have two minutes
to go, sir.
Can't you stop it?
How could I? The brake is broken.
Watch out!
Look! There 's a kid!
- Are you out of your mind?
- My baby!
Help!
The car just hit my baby.
Mommy... I'm right here.
Usually, he is a very
punctual man.
I'm sorry if I startle you, sir.
It's all right, colonel.
You're on the nose as usual, huh?
Yes, sir.
What the hell!
Lieutenant is not in...
Sergeant is out.
I'm alone... Everything
is under control, sir!
I'm sorry. The table is all broken.
Let's talk upstairs
This is information about
Meng and Mr. Yuri, the Japanese.
Weapons, illegal oil and
drug smuggling.
They are behind all of them.
Your job is to find the solid
evidence to take them to jail.
Why don't you let the police
do their job?
The Navy commands us
to do this mission secretly.
And who will be joining my team?
With me looking like this,
if anyone spot me, you can kick my ass.
Whatever I bet it always
comes out the opposite.
Easy, man. Perhaps a cigarette
may calm you down.
Don't take it too seriously.
I gotta to the mensroom.
Good luck to me!
Good luck to me!
How come my mustache
grows so fast?
Which bastard pasted
my picture over here?
The precious antique
of my father-in-law.
It costs a fortune, you know?
Wow! He was so nice
that he gave it to you.
Hell no!
He never gave me shit.
I stole it from him.
- No more bet!
- 500 grand.
I'm sorry...
I'm so sorry, sir.
That's fine.
Excuse me, do you have a lighter?
Jackpot!
Are you betting?
I pass.
I'm waiting for the next game.
Okay!
Let's put on the new bet.
Take it easy on us, will you?
Wow!
I beat you all.
Pay me up.
Today isn't really your day, is it?
Good hand means good money.
Oh shit! Anyone got busted?
Black jack again?
Here's your money.
Do you have a light?
All right. Here.
Where the hell are
all the chips gone?
Security! Come here!
What?
Get him!
He took all the chips.
You lost your bet
and you blame it on me?
Move!
Hey.
Look at me.
It's you again, Moo Warn.
The old debt is still on and you're
causing a new trouble?
I don't know.
I'm sure it's a misunderstanding.
What the hell is this?
Yeah,
I wonder what it was, too.
Stop acting as an innocent.
How much does he owe me?
The old debt is 300 grand, sir.
Cut off one of his arms!
No!
If you cut my hand...
How am I gonna clean my ass?
What do you want to say,
Moo Warn?
I have something for you.
Let go of him!
I'd like to offer my lighter.
It's worth a million.
Baloney! You're trying to trick
me with a bogus lighter?
No!
It's really genuine.
That's mine.
He crooked it from me.
Give me a break!
I just took it out from my pocket.
You're such a glib asshole.
Cut the other hand, too!
No!
Bastard!
It's you again!
How could you miss it?
Better get him and put
some bandages on.
Go!
Who are you?
Who are you?
It's none of your business.
Do you want your money
plus interest back?
A bonehead like you is
gonna pay off his debt?
Yes.
Who are you?
Where are you from?
Let go of him!
Today is your lucky day,
Moo Warn.
Let's go.
All right.
Let's get back to the game.
The whole world will see how
tough I am today.
Are you sure your
wimpy body can stand it?
I'll fight.
Oh, you're frightened?
Don't get on my damn nerve.
I'll fight.
Oh, You'll fight.
Yes.
By the way, what is he doing?
I'm a clock.
What time is it?
It's 9 p.m.
Tick-tock! Tick-tock.
Wait a second... it's now
9.30 p. M already.
Really?
I think I gotta move faster.
Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Tick-tock.
Hold on!
I'm with my customer.
Kra Pi, you bastard!
Are you in there?
Oh shit!
I told you not to talk about
it. You jinxed me.
Noon!
Yes, it's me.
You're a dead man!!!
Why do you keep
following me everywhere?
Where are you running to?
Bitch! You ever fucked
with my man?
I'm gonna rip your face into pieces!
Kra Pi, you son of a bitch. Die!!
Come back here!
Why the heck do you barge in here?
An old ass like you still
can bang the girls?
I'll give you a shot.
You nasty prick!
You want me to grab your thing?
No way.
It's not mine.
It's yours.
Oh... I see.
Kra Pi!
You're dead meat.
Oh my one-eyed willie!
Oh, you're good.
Oh, you're the best!
Do it again! Again!
Kra Pi!
Where are you running to?
Honey... I'm very exhausted.
Yes, I am, too.
But I'm still gonna fuck you up!
Don't go anywhere.
I got to!
Kra Pi, you mofo!
You pigs are all the same.
You damn cripple.
Here it is.
You will be dead.
Fuck you!
Please help me, sweety.
If you can't climb up here,
you'd better wack yourself at home.
Oh, pipsqueak! You too?
You... Die!
Gotcha!
Damn it!
He's flown the coop again.
Don't let me see you again... or else...
I'll chop your dick into pieces.
I just want to be your perfect man...
I keep reminding myself that
I'll take best care of you
What? Who are you
gonna take best care of?
Don't you dare come inside my house.
I wonder why you came back,
you bastard.
But the dreams of both of us...
Shut the fuck up, you mofo!
I thought you like Mike Piromporn.
Well, yeah.
I like Mike.
And do you like it?
What do you mean "it"?
Cause It's a club to hit your head!
Get the fuck out of my face.
Go find somewhere else to sleep.
How about a brothel?
Fuck off!
Take this!
Damn!
I got to sleep outside again.
What?
Colonel!
Your wife kick your ass out again?
Who said?
I just lock that
smelly-mouth bitch inside.
I'm sick of her whining and cursing.
You haven't changed a bit.
Well, I have a job
that needs your help.
Colonel... Look at me right now.
How can I help anyone?
It's me who should
ask for your help instead.
Well... You'll get ten million baht
for this job.
Ten million?!
Man!
You are so well equipped.
Your daddy must really love you.
Wow! Ton Horm,
you've changed quite a lot.
Not at all.
It's you, Colonel,
that has changed a lot.
Besides getting older...
Your lip is hanging down,
making me wanna kiss you.
Hey!
Stop... Stop... Stop it now.
Don't get me wrong.
You think
that I'm really gonna kiss you?
Your face is like a soaked
toilet paper. I can't take it.
I'm kidding.
Don't take it seriously
I just wonder if...
Your deep throat sucking skill...
...is still good?
Well, to be frank with you
Not only is it still perfect...
but it also has more
styles and is more sustainable.
All right.
That's more than enough.
Let me introduce your teammates.
Are they cute?
Check it out!
This is Moo Warn.
This is Khai Kem.
And this is Kra Pi,
the former bluejacket.
From afar,
I thought you're Tata Young.
- Actually the gay Teletubby.
- What?
Do your parents know
that you are a transvestite?
Well, you're a good looking man with
a shitty mouth.
You're crossing the line here.
Want me to bite your sissy neck?
I'll kick your ass.
Come on!
Colonel... I quit.
You've just come and
wanna leave now?
You know I don't like this queer.
Really?
Fine! If you wanna leave,
so get the hell out of here.
I'm leaving for sure,
you cocksucker!
Hold on!
A fag like you has no right
to beg me.
Begging you? Pew!
Take your rucksack.
Shit!
Why did you kick it?
It's full of explosives. What are
you gonna do if they blow up?
Blasting all of us!
Good. So you can't walk anymore,
you limp.
Oddball!
Look at him. Walking with his balls
swinging like a peeved child.
Don't come after me.
I'm not swallow my words.
Pew! You faggot!
Hello, colonel.
Hello, lieutenant.
Our team seems to have a problem.
Since one of them just quit.
He didn't want to join our team.
Why are you saying
something like that, colonel?
A soldier always tell the truth,
isn't he?
Pew!
Who the hell just walked out?
You're such a prick!
How could I drop out?
When the flowers are blooming.
When a navy drops an anchor...
we always do it all
the way through, right?
All the way to hell, I believe.
This is lieutenant Prig,
my assistant.
Really?
Will a beautiful
assistant like lieutenant.
Be able to cause any harm?
I forgot to tell you that
she is a martial art expert.
Whoever wanna test her
fighting skill...
...step up to the front.
Love and Peace, okay?
This is a special force called
"Num Prig Long Rouey"
Mr. Meng's residence.
Where are you calling from?
Nobody called you.
Lulu is speaking.
Who do you want to speak to?
My master?
Oh! It's burning.
It's burning.
Sir, from the senator.
Yes.
Don't worry, sir.
I'll transfer every single
penny to your account.
I guarantee I won't bring you
any trouble.
Absolutely!
Have a nice day.
The country is full of greedy asshole.
No wonder why it's going nowhere.
Eating all day...
Aren't you guys getting tired?
Haaaa!!!
Flying out of the water,
maybe he thinks he's a bird.
Sir, we've captured
the betrayer, Chol.
You're a backstabbing son of a bitch.
And see? You can't really
make it all the way through.
I'm sorry sir.
Please forgive me.
I'm so sorry.
Very good talker.
Sir, I don't smoke.
I quit smoking long time ago.
Smoking is bad for your health.
I don't want you to smoke a cigarette.
I want you to eat it!
Your name is Sai Chol, right?
It means you must be with the water.
Dump this piece of shit into the sea!
No forgiveness is given to a traitor.
Anyone calls Yuri for me.
Yuri... About the next
lot of shipment.
We need to call it off.
I just got a not very good news.
Whenever I'm ready,
I'll contact you again, okay?
Is it right here?
Here we are.
Off the boat.
Come on in.
I won't be staying
here with all of you.
Lieutenant Prig will be the one
who will take care of you.
Whatever you need,
just let her know.
If I need a pillow...
I can give you one.
If I need a mosquito net...
I told you that you can give you one.
What if I need a wife?
I can give... No! Ask him.
I don't know he still has energy
to play nookie?
I can't find one myself.
Damn sick of your smutty talk.
Come on, don't talk like that.
When we're together,
we must have a discipline.
Yes, sir.
I have three simple rules.
First... No alcohol.
Second... No gambling
And finally... No sex whatsoever.
Got it?
I'm out!
Where are you going,
you cock-craving fag?
What do you mean "crafting a flag"?
Try crafting a flag with me outside?
Come on.
Split up and take some rest.
I don't have time
for your nonsense.
Go pick the room you like.
There's only one bedroom.
- One bedroom?
- What?
Get out!
I have a bad joint.
Can I sleep on the bed?
You can say anything you like.
I'd like to use my right
as a high-ranked officer...
to sleep on this bed right now.
Your right is granted!
I don't give a damn about that.
I'm at the bed top,
I got the bed.
Let me ask you something?
Have you ever been taught
to be a gentleman?
You must serve the ladies.
Here we have two ladies.
Me and her.
So I got the bed.
You faggot!
You're not a woman.
- I'm a woman.
- Quiet! Quiet!
If you are still arguing,
I'd say that...
I'll be sleeping alone in this room.
All of you sleep outside.
Since this room has two beds.
One of the beds should
belong to one of us.
- Yes, I agree.
- Yes.
Well, I'll leave to all of you then.
You decide who's gonna
take this bed.
I think to be fair to everyone.
We should pick the winner
from a stick pick.
No!
That's nonsense.
You're a gambling freak...
You'll definitely win.
That's not fair.
Well, since we're all grown up.
We should sit down and talk...
What the reason you
suppose to sleep on the bed.
- I have a period.
- I have a bad joint.
- I have a period.
- I'm seasick.
If I sleep on the floor,
I'll bleed excessively.
We're friends. Why are we
bickering with each other?
We're supposed to stick together.
I don't ask you all to good to me.
I come here joining
our team because...
I love you all.
I don't know what the future
holds for me.
In the last battle, I knew that
I was the one who got shot.
A cripple like me can't run
as fast as you.
I'll be the first who gets killed.
And I apologize to all of you that.
I have been hiding
this secret from you.
The truth is I was not born
in a high-class family.
My mom was a street hooker.
My daddy was a pimp.
All my life,
I slept on a cheap canvas bed.
I've never slept on a nice
bed like this one.
You guys can have it if you like.
I love you all, my friends.
No! That's enough.
That's enough.
I'll sleep outside.
You deserve to sleep here. I'll go.
No... You'd better sleep here.
With all you have been through...
You still want me to sleep
on this bed.
This bed is for you.
Have you ever heard a story
of my grandpa?
He molested me while I was slept.
What a sucky life I have!
No. No.
Sleeping on the bed...
But have to stay out of the room.
Think it's comfy, right?
Perhaps the weather
up there is too good...
Yeah... It's so good sleeping here.
But it'll be much better if
I can sleep inside.
Who knows?
Tonight I might sneak in and have
a little fun with the lieutenant.
If you go, I'll go, too.
If I were on her bed,
I'd transform myself into a rabbit.
You Asshole!
I wanna join too.
What are you transforming to?
I'll be a turtle.
Why turtle?
Because a turtle reaches the finish
line before a rabbit!
Do you think we're gonna
get this job done?
I don't really think so.
Why not?
We can do it, man.
Well, Oddball... what are you gonna
do with your money?
Could you get the
cord on the fridge for me?
I don't know where it is.
It's on the fridge, Oam.
I know you're too lazy.
All right, stay here!
Don't mess around here.
I'll go get the cord.
Ouch!
Oam! I told you.
Don't mess around.
If I get the money, I'll get...
For me...
How about you?
Well, I...
Nothing.
I'm so tired. Good night!
Don't they have any chick
nurses here at all?
You're such a nasty fink!
Moo Warn.
Go to the examination room.
Lieutenant... could you please
come with me?
I'm... I'm kind of scared.
No, I can't.
I can't believe you still using the
"scared" trick.
Oh... some miserable cripple...
Not only got a lame leg
but also a dopey joke, huh?
Son of a bitch!
Could you put your damn foot down?
Aham!
Are you really an oddball?
Haven't taken a shower for days.
It smells odd.
I mean your name.
Oh I see...
My name is Tanong Kumpanad,
the former navy.
From your body check-up,
you're healthy.
Ouch!
What's happening?
It hurts right here.
Yeah... right here.
It hurt right here first...
and then it moved down here.
All right.
Why don't you lie down?
Like this?
No.
Please lie down first.
Yeah... lie down and relax.
Hold on.
Let me give you some massage.
What are you checking here?
I'm checking your heart.
But you're touching
my hard nipple.
Please take a deep breath.
Inhale is you and exhale is also you.
Inhale is you and exhale is also you.
Done!
Wow... Me too!
Fantastic! Your hand is soft
like a heavenly feather.
Wow! It really helps soothe
my aching muscles.
Very nice indeed!
You can massage it a little harder
if you like.
Why do you stop it?
Keep up with your stroke...
It's coming along so good.
I think I'll do a new position.
New position... really?
It must be really thrilling.
You can do harder...
go deep to the right target.
That's what I thought!
Why are you beating me?
Why?
Nurse.
Yes.
Can I ask you one question?
You can ask me as many
as you want.
Are you sure?
Yes. Go ahead.
There's nobody here.
Well... about sexual surgery...
I see. You have to pass
the body check-up first.
If I pass the check up
and I can do it right away?
Yes, right away as you wish.
It's all right.
Are you afraid of a needle?
Afraid of Needle?
How could you ask me that?
My parents are doctors,
you know?
Even my grandfather is a doctor.
You mean a medical doctor?
Nope. A voice doctor!
Oh god!
It's magnificent.
Well, I think... you should rethink
about having it cut.
All of you have to go
get your outfits...
and meet Colonel Kung
at the conference room.
Where should I go get the stuff?
You'll know it soon.
It sounds very private.
I wonder what is so attractive
about the private parts.
If you wanna know,
just ask the lieutenant to see it.
No problem!
You wanna see my privates?
You can grab and penetrate
as deep as you want.
Yuck! I don't wanna even
glimpse at your ugly dipstick.
What hospital did you have
your facelift?
You have hair over here!
I'm sure your eyes will pop up
and your nose will hang down soon.
- Are you done barking?
- Yes.
Turn your face over here.
Bastard! Go!
Bitch!
This is the picture of Meng,
the mafia of illegal weapons
drugs and all kinds of contraband.
He has networks
throughout the country.
Every time when we try
to place them under arrest.
We always get the lackeys
but never the big boss.
Because he knows several
influential figures.
This is Mr. Yuri, a Japanese guy.
He is Meng's business partner.
And right now he is spending
his vacation in Thailand.
It's your job to find
the evidence of their felony.
One of his men confessed
that he'd videotaped it.
But he didn't know where
Meng has kept it.
If this mission is accomplished,
you'll be rewarded as you know.
But if you flunk it,
your identity will be vanished.
How are we gonna find them?
Don't worry.
Lieutenant Prig will explain
to you all in detail.
Please, Lieutenant.
Here is his house in Bangkok.
And his beach resort.
Whenever Yuri visits Thailand,
he will stay here.
We used to take charge
while they're transferring goods.
But when we arrived,
they always slipped away.
That means...
They must be hiding
in a secret island somewhere.
That's why we formed
our own secret unit.
And find talented members
for a specific task.
Our team have to put
our lives on the line.
And as you all are former navies.
You must know
that if we are to die
we all are gonna die together.
Thank you.
What if I can hack into
his information?
Then our mission will
complete faster.
Hey! Ton Horm.
You still haven't told us
about your dream.
If the job is done,
what will you do with the money?
How am I gonna spend the money?
Actually my dream
is not as big as all of yours.
It's just a little dream.
I...
I'd like to have my own cabaret.
A cabaret show?
Judge from what I've just seen.
Your moves are not bad at all.
I thought
I was watching a real show.
I'm sure your dream
won't be too far away.
This sailor will see to it that
your dream comes true.
Go for it, Ton Horm!
Can you please turn
on the music for me?
Turn on the music?
For you,
Ton Horm... Certainly!
Why the hell did you do that for?
Why are you turning on the music?
What does it has to do with you?
I don't like loud music,
so I turn it off. So what?
I'll let you two alone then.
So what? I can't shit
because your music is too loud.
People are trying to sleep.
If you wanna sleep,
go find other place.
This damn space is for everyone.
Oh yeah?
We come here for a battle!
And why the hell do you dress
up like this?
Can you please turn on the
music for me?
I'm trying to sleep
but your music is damn loud.
I wanna listen to it!
Getting on my nerve?
Turn off!
I wanna dance!
You wanna play rough, huh?
How about this?
You're way over the line.
Oh? You think that rough?
I can show something rougher
than that. Look!
Braa! Braa!
Son of a bitch!
Stop it!
Stop. Stop!
- What's going on?
- Take it easy... both of you.
If you don't stop,
the mission is cancelled!
Take it easy... both of you.
Let me go!
You'd better watch your ass.
Lieutenant! I'm not gonna share
the same room with them.
As if I care!
I have always on alert.
What the hell is going on?
Don't you see he's turning
the music on so loud.
I'm going to bed.
And why don't you sleep
with the music?
Duh.
Lieutenant,
did you hear something?
Yes.
What is it?
I'm not sure.
But I can feel something
smelling not right.
I think we might be in an
insecure situation.
If something happens,
remember that I'm right outside.
- Okay! Thanks a lot.
- You're welcome.
Why do you tight us together?
What do you want?
Hey!
What are you doing?
What are you trying to do?
There is nothing you want.
What do they want from us?
I told you something wasn't right.
What should we do?
Let me find a knife to untie us.
How the hell did they tie the knot?
Hey, turn your face away from me.
This side?
No! Other side.
All right.
But this knot is very tight.
We have to do something.
Hey! Can't you just be still?
It hurts me.
- Kra Pi... Please help us!
- Moo Warn... Lieutenant!
What are you doing here?
Why are you here so early?
What did you say?
I told him to untie us... Quickly!
What are you playing here?
Without your help,
we'll be in trouble.
I'll call Colonel Kung
to inform him.
Come on.
Hey... Can I do it one more time?
I wanna do it again.
No... Hurry up!
Change your clothes.
My life is never this happy before.
Are you all right, lieutenant?
I'm okay.
But they took our stuff.
In case they came back,
let me escort you here.
That's okay.
I'm fine.
Please let me escort you here.
No. You can go.
Let me be with you, please.
No! Get out!
Lieutenant...
Again?
Why do you have to tie me with him?
Who the heck are you?
You freaks!
Could you turn your face
the other way?
Lieutenant.
Do you care for a dance with me?
Are you nuts? How could you be
in a mood for dancing?
I've been in a mood since
they started tying us.
What?
Hey... Hold this.
Wow... You're getting
heated too, huh?
When it's my turn, you get
in there and tie me up tightly.
Very tight like this, got it?
Let my face be on her breast.
I'll tie you up and you do the rest,
okay?
What is that noise?
Oddball! Come and untie us.
What is going on here?
- Two thugs came from nowhere...
- Let me release you first.
Let me release you first.
Hey!
Just right on time, huh?
Kra Pi!
I'm trying to untie you here.
What happened?
Did you hear me?
What happened?
Thieves... They just attacked us.
What?
Thieves in our place?
Yes.
They took away some stuff.
Holy crap!
I'm gonna go check on Moo Warn.
This sucks!
How did they guard the house.
Lieutenant, wait here!
I'll go get those sons of a bitch!
Please, don't hurt me.
Please... I beg you.
Wait a minute! Again?
Yes, do it... in a hurry.
Oddball!
You asshole!
What the fuck are you up to?
We agreed that
I'll be locked up with her!
You're trying to stab
me the back, huh?
- What?
- I'm not gonna be a sour loser.
Wanna threaten me
with that toy gun?
What is it all about?
Moo Warn.
Kra Pi
How on earth could
you do this to me?
Whose idea was it?
He was the first one
who came up with the idea.
He is the one... No
you... Not it's you!
- You're the one...
- It's you. All your idea.
All of you on this?
Who is behind me?
It's me, Oddball. Your daddy.
I see.
Good.
What the fuck!
Nasty faggot! Fuck you!
What the hell have you been eating?
Stinky fart, you bitch.
- What the fuck is that?
- Yuck!
Pew!
Baywatch!
He really ruins my drive sex!
Sex drive!
Time up!
Get out of the pool.
Can we stay longer?
What do you think?
They all look like little fish.
So tiny that
I can't believe they are usable.
If three of ours combined,
they will surely blow up your ass.
You fag! You'll never get a piece
of my meat in your ass.
Don't whine when you get hungry.
Here...
I don't wanna be too mean to you.
Shit! My pants!
Crap! That's my pants, too.
And that's mine.
Give it back to me.
I'll give you one.
Hey! I want my pants.
Give me my pants!
You psychotic fag... Give it to me.
You stupid queer... how could
you give us only one pants.
Give us all of them.
You stinky-ass faggot.
You water buffalo.
He's such a nerve-wracking homo!
One day I'll surely bomb
his sissy ass.
Oddball, you're the biggest.
You go get that pants
and then go get our towels.
All right.
Well, not a good idea.
There are people around here.
I can't do it.
My ding dong is waking up.
You Dick smack! How could you get
a boner during this time?
Look at mine... it's look like
a roasted fish!
I got an idea. Let's get to
the restroom on that side.
It's closer.
You think so?
- Yeah!
- Let's go.
How was your traitor fellow?
He got dumped into
the sea to feed the sharks.
I don't know how much
he'd spilled the bean?
He's just a small piece of crap.
He knew nothing.
Shall we go outside, Yuri?
Feeling hot? Here, try this.
You'll be cooled down soon.
Or perhaps get even hotter!
Girls, you gotta
treat Mr. Yuri more attentively.
He used to eat only
Japanese raw fish.
Today he wanna try some
Thai juicy fish.
What do you think, Yuri?
I guarantee you won't find anything
like this in Yokohama.
All right!
All they do is making
fucking tires.
Your girls are amazing.
Aren't you gonna send them
to feed the sharks?
Now only two left. If both are dead,
who will serve you whiskey then?
The Middle East customer has
ordered the weapons. Urgently!
Why the hell they need
the weapons in such a hurry?
They blow up each
other ass every day.
But they pay us really well.
I know that.
But I just got on black-listed.
I need to do things
cautiously now.
I thought you have quite
a strong backer.
Well, he can get flabby
from time to time.
Don't worry...
I got a very bright idea.
Lieutenant.
You are always in my heart.
We belong to each other.
How is it going?
All set!
Who the hell has just shit
around here?
Holy Shit!
Yuck!
Who the fuck put
this shit in my hand?
Crap! And pee too!
What filthy scuzz put these shit
and pee on me? Fucker!
I think it comes from
that fag Ton Horm.
Look! I got the evidence.
He's such an idiot.
This is his bag.
Yeah I'm gonna throw it away.
It's damn heavy.
What the hell are you doing?
I'm trying to sleep here!
That's what you get for
being an asshole!
Where is the sugar?
Where is the sugar?
Can't you see it?
Here! You can have however
much you like.
That is pepper.
It says "pepper" right here.
Moron!!
Who told you it's pepper?
I wrote "pepper" to fool stupid ants.
But it's sugar in there.
If those ants know
it's sugar in there
they'd come and eat it all.
Knucklehead!
Oh, mother of boobs!
Come on, you cripple!
Get down! Get down!
Get ready.
5... 4...
3... 2... 1
Down! Down!
Boom! Boom! Boom!
What's the hell wrong with you?
Yeah, I wonder.
Where is the bomb?
I forgot to press the button.
You Cripple.
See? I still have what it takes!
How is your team doing, colonel?
All ready! Anytime, sir!
Excellent!
Our intelligence
has informed that.
Yuri and Meng are hiding
in their beach resort.
And the American
agent told us that.
The target is now in our seaboard
to pick up their stuff.
But we still can't figure out where
the island they are hiding is.
Here is the CD that contains
information about all potential islands
You should give it to Kra Pi,
the sailor in your team.
Probably he can figure it out.
If you find out their whereabouts,
notify me at once.
Yes, sir.
Mr. Yuri,
our boss wants to see you.
This way, please.
I think there is some kind of a party.
Yes, I think so. Seems like
hundreds of people in there.
- Hey! Stop.
- Shit!
What are you doing here?
We're fishing, sir.
Fishing? Don't you know
that it's restricted area?
It is this punk ass who hired me here.
He told me to come find
some pieces of shit.
What? You son of a bitch!
It's your fault.
What are you blaming me for?
It's because of you.
Are you mad at me because
I ate your food?
Such an asshole!
The colonel is so fuckin' punctual.
This bastard Meng
is a real smutty cock head.
Look! They're all queers.
What kind of party is that?
That's fuckin' sick!
Good evening, everyone.
I'm so very happy tonight.
Because I can come out of a closet
I've been hiding...
...like all of you here.
I hope you all will have a great time.
Only tonight...
that you can do whatever
you want... everything whatsoever!
Cause tonight belongs
exclusively to us.
No bimbos allowed!
Moo Warn and Prig,
go to Meng's office...
and hack the information
from his computer.
- I know you like it, huh?
- Yes.
- You wanna be here?
- Yes.
Then you blend into his party.
Cool! A fag should get his shit
together with other fags.
Let's rock the queer's world.
I'm gonna kick the shit out of you.
Can you two stop fighting?
You come here!
You, the cripple, come with me.
Yes, sir.
What the fuck is that for?
You kicked my ass?
Take it easy!
But he just kicked me.
Why do you bring a liquor?
We're working.
I want it to calm me down.
Bullshit! Ditch it!
No! No!
Come on! Colonel,
don't throw a good stuff away.
I'll keep it. I like the bottle,
it's kind of beautiful.
Same here.
Not a chance.
Go! Do your work.
When finished,
get back to the meeting place, okay?
What should we do now?
Come on.
Hold on please... Oh!
...Good evening.
Good evening.
I've been a big fan of your work.
Let me help you.
Very lovely shoes.
Let me help.
Your hair is so beautiful.
What are you doing here,
sweetheart?
I'm looking for a cigar to smoke.
Do you have one for me?
I see.
You wanna smoke a cigar?
Yeah... honey.
Well, I have one for you.
It's a humongous one!
I'd love it.
Let's count to three.
Okay... one... and two... and three...
Mama!
The singer of the next song
is having a diarrhea.
What should we do?
Fuck! It's my bad day indeed.
I've lost my bet.
And this Baywatch has
her ass full of shit.
How can I find a replacement now?
I can do it.
Keep your hideous face
for a freak show only!
Grab the dress!
Fuck!
My face looks like a superstar.
How could I be a queer?
Fuck you! Superstar?
I think it should be a sickening star.
Whatever... Help me think
who should I be?
I can't play any instruments.
It's really not my cup of tea.
What should I be?
A waiter!
A waiter?
Cool! Now I can moisten
my tonsils with some booze.
Damn!
There're so many people here.
That means they must have
a big lot of weapons.
Hey... You wanna dispose
your bombs right now?
Oops!
What the hell!
Wow! Marilyn Monroe!
I can't believe
you can be such a stout queen.
Wow!
Isn't this some kind of shooting device
of the aborigines?
I saw it in the movie
but never blow a real thing.
That thing you're blowing
is actually a...
Cucumber calls cow-pea.
We've found Meng's office.
Hah? Okay. Okay. Good!
Get in there!
Is everything all right?
Did you get the stuff out?
Everything is all set.
Great.
Hmm... Where the heck
is my laptop?
Can't you remember
where you put it, sir?
It's in your bedroom upstairs.
If I can't find it,
you gotta be responsible.
Cucumber!
Meng is going into that room.
Is it there?
Let's go find it. Is it in here?
I remember it was here
the last time I used it.
Lulu... Go look in that room.
Me again?
How the hell could it disappear?
What the fuck is that noise?
Motherfuckers!
Are you trying to kill me
with a damn snake?
Sir... I found it.
You found my laptop?
Where is it?
I found... found...
a gec... a gec... a gecko!
You're scared of a gecko
but stepped on my one-eyed snake.
I'm fucking sick with you,
you idiot.
Look!
What is it?
How the hell could it be right here?
How come I didn't see it earlier?
It's been here for
a quite a while already.
Go! You get over there alone first.
If I go by myself,
how about you?
I'll be standing right here.
How come we're not
going together?
If I go, can you still call
it going there alone?
Very profound indeed!
Go! You stupid.
Man! I thought I've lost it.
Shit! That bastard is coming.
Where the hell should I hide?
Why are you always
in my fucking way?
What a grumpy old man you are!
Look around.
Do you see anything suspicious?
Nothing.
I saw only a gecko.
Over there.
Lulu!
Yes?
Light me a cigarette.
Don't you see it's still nothing here.
How about this?
Is it okay now?
Do you want some more?
Bitch! It's lit long time ago.
Can't you see it?
You burned the heck
out of my cigarette.
Where are you going now?
Damn it!
Only one cigarette left...
We can buy a new packet.
How many times have I told you?
Don't order that stupid
Marlboro brand.
Why not?
It stinks like a shitty asshole.
Wanna quench it again?
Maybe it'll smell like a chocolate.
Thanks a lot... I don't have to remove
my hernia now.
What are you doing with my costumes?
I'm a replacement singer.
Great! Go get dressed.
Hurry up!
Fuck!
No way! I'm just kidding.
Good luck!
Get lose or else
I'll tramp over your hag face.
I'm tired of digging out shit.
That's it. I quit.
Nope
Hey! What are you standing for?
Come here!
No way! Bye Bye!
Piak! Go get him!
- I'm not taking a shit.
- Come on.
There's nothing in there.
I think he needs a vacuum cleaner.
Sir, there are intruders in here.
Who?
Don't know, sir.
How the hell you don't know
who they are?
They must be the police.
Are you all right, colonel?
Who are you?
It's me, Prig.
And you?
I'm Moo Warn, remember?
What have you been doing?
Why are you black like a nigger?
They burned my ass with a candle
and kindled me with a cigarette.
They are all sick freaks!
What happened to you?
What's going on with you?
I went to the wrong room.
They thought
I was hiding drugs in my ass.
And damn!
They just dig everything out of there.
Did they find anything?
They found some shit!
Some drugs?
No... My goddamn shit!
And what should we do next?
Well, where is the evidence?
Where is it?
Colonel, well we almost
got the evidence.
Damn you! You didn't get it.
I got my asshole burned for nothing.
We're going to get the evidence.
Follow me... I'll take you there.
Colonel, are you okay?
How far do we still have to go?
What's wrong with you, Ton Horm?
Don't you see your daddy is coming?
Check it thoroughly!
Go ahead!
Hack some information from it.
Yes, sir.
Hey!
You go watch the entrance.
Why should I?
Cause you've never seen it. Moron!
Okay. Take me there.
Not fun anymore.
Damn!
We'd better hide.
Call the colonel.
Copy!
Colonel Kung?
I think they know that we're here.
Ton Horm!
Something is up with Ton Horm.
Let's go see him.
I don't give that fag a damn.
That's good evidence.
Here it is!
What next?
You'd better go upstairs
to be with the rest of us.
While I sidetrack them
to go this way.
Okay. Good idea.
Okay, see you there.
That really wakes
me up from the jag. Go!
Get them!
What are you running away from?
Meng's bodyguards.
They're shooting behind me.
By the way,
did you get the evidence?
Of course!
Colonel.
Where is Ton Horm?
He came here ahead of me.
Really?
Let's go!
Hey! Freeze!
Where are you guys going?
Why do I have to tell you idiots?
This way. Come on!
It seems like they're taking
the whole troop here.
Yuri... Look! They've caught us
some screwy freaks.
Hey! Who the hell are you?
I'm not telling you a fuck.
At least we're not cops.
How many of you are here?
If I tell you there're six of us,
are you gonna believe me?
And why did you tell him?
Well, I'm kind of an upright person.
They're not gonna believe us.
They'll know about our plan.
You think I'm a fucking dimwit?
Look at how fucking goofy
you're dressing.
Like you are so pretty, faggot!
Just finish them off!
It's too easy, Yuri.
I have a much better idea.
No! My God! Look at this red outfit.
Why? What's wrong with it?
It's so dowdy! Very drab!
How could you come up
with this color?
Lulu... Try the white one.
That bitch in white
looks like a real woman.
Yeah... I think so.
Well, you've got to prove
it for yourself.
This is a real meat! Try it!
Yes. I'm a man.
See? Both of us are men.
But that bimbo in white
has no chest hair at all.
I shaved it... shaved it and... shaved it!
She's phony.
Take her to our boss. Now!
Wait! Wait!
Let's go. Now!
- We can explain it.
- Go!
Take her to the boss.
What's the matter with you?
I got a stomachache.
Oh... my belly really hurt!
Stop!
Come on in! I'm ready.
Hold on, everyone.
What is it?
How about sipping it?
Isn't that my sneaky pete?
Have a sip.
It'll really cheer you up.
You know me the best, man!
Come on! I'm ready.
You cracked squirrel,
are you ready?
The first question is...
It's an octopus.
How about that!
The three-chef canned fish...
...from a 100% genuine sardines...
...fresh fish imported
from New Zealand.
For a delicious dish,
add with the vermicelli.
That's enough!
And what the fuck is this fish?
- Dag fish!
- No!
- Some fish!
- No!
- Jom fish!
- Wrong!
- Salmon
- No!
- Paprika!
- Hell no!
Damn! What a fucking stinky fish!
That's against the rule.
Can I have a helper option?
What option do you want?
I wanna lick it.
You got your option right now!
Oh Shit!
Hell No!
You son of a bitch!
Who told you to throw up
on my goddamn nails?
Just right on the target!
The answer is Toe fish!
This idiot can't answer the question.
He's a nitwit.
All of your friends can't live either.
Kill them all.
What does it has to do with us?
Just kill him!
Help me... Please!
You queer hag! Let my friends go,
or this bitch is dead.
Don't you see now that
we're on top of your game.
Okay you dingy bat,
you got your hostage, right?
You don't have a hostage anymore.
What? She's dead...
You're on top of my game, aren't you?
Not quite.
My turn will be next to the colonel.
Why do you have to be next to me?
How about this?
Since I'm dying anyway,
can I ask for one last thing?
Tell me what you want.
You're such a refined man.
Can I have a sip of a whiskey?
Take whatever sip you want.
Besides being a wicked fag,
you are also very kind.
All right.
For me to die,
it has to be with dignity.
It has to have a loud noise.
Loud noise!
Thank you for saving me,
Ton Horm.
Ton Horm.
Ton Horm, are you all right?
Wake up! Don't die.
Sacrifice is truly a dignified conduct.
Especially when one sacrifices
for the country
which is what all brave
soldiers should do.
And the sacrifice that
you've made for this mission
is definitely the most
honorable to us all.
On behalf of the Royal Thai Navy...
we'd like to imprint your name
in this honorary medal
to commemorate the great
thing you had done for us.
We'll make the dream
of Ton Horm comes true.
If you really love me, really love me...
you gotta ask my mom
Love me, you gotta ask my mom.
See what she says
If you really love me, really love me...
don't be afraid of anyone
Love me, just follow me.
We'll run away together
If you really love me,
really love me... you gotta ask my dad.
Love me, you gotta ask my dad.
See what he says
If you really love me, really love me...
don't be afraid of anyone
Love me, your parents will see,
and we'll flee together
Oho God! Oh God!
I'm a handsome man...
a real handsome man
I'm not joking. It's so true
I know you fall for me
You're flirting me
with your sexy eyes
Your smile blows my mind away
I smile to you without delay
My heart is pounding
sound like Oh-Oh!
Oh-Oh! Oh God! It's sad.
I'm just one crazy man
Oh-oh! Somebody
is keeping looking at me...
I feel shy but don't know
where to hide
Aya... Ya-Ya... Ooh-Arr.
I'm a human like you guys.
Also have mouth, eyebrow,
chin and eyes
My face is like ordinary people
Aya... Ya... Ya Ooh... Arr...
Only my heart is different
For me... I like to eat cute men...
Dark-tall-handsome, oh my dear!
Is there anyone left around here?
Yeah... Ahah... Yo... Yo... Yeah
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
Aya... Ya... Ya... Ohu...
Ohu... Aya... Ya... Ya
On a lonely night,
come sing a Ohu song
Oh honey, I'm bawling like
competing with a dog
Where are you? Yahoo!
How come you're not coming to me?
Oh wah! Oh lala!
My body is gradual declining
Oh tonight I miss you,
my Joo-Jood-Joo
I don't know where you are,
whom you're with
Why not coming to me?
I see you I'll spank you
You break the heart of a guy
named Choo-Chood-Choo
We all have a dream.
Each with different dreams
No matter how hard and how painful,
we'll still stand
We come from different paths
but now we all are here
to share the same dream,
same happiness and sorrow
Friends won't and
never will abandon friends
cause you and me love each
other too much to understand
Whoever missed their step,
we all will help them stand up
No matter how far is the dream,
we'll go there together
Friends won't and
never will abandon friends
cause you and me love each other
too much to understand
Whoever missed their step,
we all will help them stand up
No matter how far is the dream,
we're in the same boat to get there
If it's my dream,
I will... bang... bang... bang!
I'm not a hookworm.
I have a wormkiller Benda 500.
One pill one time
I was there,
the colonel got shot at his right ball.
When flied to hit the bunker,
it didn't get crumbled at once.
It bounced into
the air around 15 feet.
And then hit my bunker hole
and broke into pieces.
Testis ball or a tennis ball?
I'm serious.
I wish you saw it.
Let's look at it in the computer.
No need. I can tell you,
the whole was torn apart.
What the hell are you looking at?
Lieutenant, something is wrong
in my eyes. I can't see.
What's wrong?
It's love that makes me blind.
Girls, today is my birthday.
Happy birthday to you.
Lieutenant,
I've already got a wife.
My wife bans me from the brothel
but I still go there.
She bans me from drinking alcohol
but I still get drunk.
I'll quit it all,
If you are OK to be my wife.
Take that!
- I got her at my feet.
- Really? Wow!
And then I bow down.