Neon Spring (2022) Movie Script

There's a cool rave in Kauguri.
A rave?
You'll like it.
It will be much better.
-You promise?
-Yes.
-Not very convincing.
-I promise.
Come here.
Safe, they're not coming inside.
-We have to go here?
-This way, I think.
Masha, catch it.
Yay, thanks, man.
-Can I?
-Yes, take a sip.
Drink it down.
Thank you.
Laine?
-Where to?
-To the rave.
Have you got the wristbands?
No.
Ok, let's go.
-You want a token?
-Yes.
-All good?
-Yes.
Come here!
Come here!
Cider.
Fuck off, ok?
You want a cigarette?
No.
Because I don't smoke.
Cool clip.
It's a song title.
I know.
I wanted to look at you.
-Good evening.
-Oh gosh!
-Can I have a match?
-Yes, here you go!
Thank you.
That's Adams.
Laine.
Gunda.
And now what?
-I think I'm not scared anymore.
-I am a little bit.
So long!
What are you doing?
Thinking.
What are you thinking?
-Why Laine?
-What do you mean, "why Laine"?
Why did they give you that name?
It's a name
in Estonian and Finnish,
means "a wave".
But some Estonians I know told me
that they actually have many
words for waves.
Like the Eskimos have many words
for snow.
It's a fun fact that people
usually know.
And Laine is a small wave.
And how'd they call a big wave?
I don't know,
I don't have a middle name.
-Actually, it's a stupid name.
-Why?
Because my last name is Ezera-Lake.
And then...
a wave, a lake, waterlilies, fish...
clouds, swans...
What are we trying to say here?
Can you take Budzis
to the talk therapist?
-Where?
-To talk therapist.
Speech therapist.
Talk therapist.
No, it's speech therapist,
and why can't mom take him?
Mom is in Germany.
She didn't tell you?
She might have, but I can't remember
everything she says.
A minor detail.
Yeah, yeah...
Ok, I can, but I won't start
babysitting him now.
You don't need to babysit,
just take him to the speech therapist.
I can help once or twice.
-Exactly.
-When I say help, I mean exactly that.
Exactly.
But that's it.
Hop in.
-Hi!
-Hi!
-How did it go?
-Good.
-What did you?
-We played a computer game.
What game?
Doom Eternal.
-Who do you have to shoot there?
-Demons.
Hey!
Budzis, please don't shoot dad
or we will crash.
Yes, and if you throw grenades,
please do it out of the window.
-Hey. Gunda?
-Yes.
I don't know.
Yeah, I'm sorry I had to leave.
In the theatre?
Yes, I think it would be nice.
You know, I'll you back.
Sorry, bye.
Pizza day!
I ordered pizza.
-Anything else?
-Yes.
Tomorrow I'm leaving,
I'm going to a conference for a week.
I wanted to ask you to look
after Budzis.
So it's for a week now?
Didn't we just have a talk about me
looking after him for a day or two?
Helping?
We did, but what can we...
We don't have a babysitter yet.
That babysitter is
not coming back, yes?
I don't know what's up
with the babysitter. Pizza day!
Can I borrow your charger?
I can't find mine.
-Budzis, do you know where my charger is?
-No.
You took the charger in the morning.
Pizza day!
Having answered
all the possible scientific questions...
-What is it?
-Placenta.
...we won't have come close
to the problems of our lives.
Every morning I moisturise
my head with placenta.
It's what... Wait.
Laine, do you know that you can
moisturise your head with placenta?
-Yes.
-Everyone knows that.
Everyone does it.
I don't moisturise my head
with placenta.
Well, it's your head, your problem.
But Wittgenstein writes to Russell...
-It stinks.
-This idea can seem paradoxical.
Excuse me girls,
what are you busy with?
This idea can seem paradoxical,
since the science doesn't solve...
life's...
...problems,
but it demonstrates that Wittgenstein
has an understanding of life,
the epicentre of which can be touched
upon...
Hi!
Hi!
I brought you the book.
I've even read it.
Is it about that Saturday?
Ok, I'll bring you the Plato...
What about Saturday?
I didn't want to leave you
there like that.
On your own.
Do you always have
to look after me?
And then you leave me alone
for a bit,
and apologize for it.
Am I getting it right?
I just...
I didn't mean for the rest
to happen either.
You know, I must go,
logic is calling me.
-Laine!
-"Laine"!
Laine...
What's up with the girls in your class?
Why do you ask?
Well, you said that
you're not friends with them.
Why not?
They're not like the boys.
What do you mean,
they're not like the boys?
They are interested in other things,
ponies and princesses.
Like... what is that?
Come on, not all girls are only
interested in ponies and princesses.
Yes, I know, but...
They are like that in our class.
Yes.
Thank you.
But maybe you can show them
some cool computer games.
What?
Girls don't play computer games?
I'm sure they do.
But the girls in my class,
the ones who likes the ponies,
the kind of games they play...
Yeah. Listen, man.
-I'll be home late, yes?
-Ok.
Sorry that I interrupted you
like that but I gotta go.
Don't wait up for me.
Go to bed, ok?
You can watch some cartoons.
-Can you take my bag, please?
-Ok.
Too much information, I'm sorry.
-Ok, bye!
-Bye!
-Hey!
-Hey!
I brought you something.
Thank you.
Let's go?
-Hey!
-Hey!
Here's the sticker.
-Let's go to Venus?
-On a Thursday?
Yes, it will be a great party.
But I don't think you can go like this.
-Masha, I think she looks really good.
-You'll put on my coat.
Masha?
It's a nickname. Actually,
she doesn't know a word in Russian.
-I understand Russian very well.
-Yes.
But don't you maybe just want to chill
and listen to music or something?
-No.
-No.
Got it?
10 euros.
Your phone.
You know...
Maybe you go yourself.
So that next time...
Next time what?
So that next time
you can get it yourself.
He'll know what you need?
-I have to get on the car?
-Yeah, it's alright.
Hey!
Where's Gunda?
She told me to get on.
So, what's the plan?
Well, the usual.
A chill night, yes?
Real chill evening.
Get yourself something to drink.
Thank you.
Say hi to Gunda.
Half.
I said, half.
Fuck.
Is this normal?
Well, yes...
The burning?
Okay.
It will be all right, yes?
Well, you took almost two lines.
You think I don't see
that I'm an idiot, huh?
If Adams says or does it,
it doesn't count, right?
Let's all laugh at Adams now, huh?
What do you want?
Let's go to the afterparty at Roberts'.
What's up, man?
Unfortunate party?
Let's go.
Laine, tell me why is it like that?
Like what?
You run after someone
like an idiot for four years,
but they don't understand you,
they don't want to
understand you and so on.
Things happen in a normal way
to everyone, but me... Hold on!
But in an idiotic way to me.
-Well, if I understand correctly...
-Hold on!
...what you're talking about,
then I believe
that these things are neither normal,
nor easy to comprehend.
And yet it's a shame.
-Aren't we going with them?
-I'm not.
Ok, then I'll go home.
Want me to walk you?
Catch up with them.
-Ok. Bye!
-Bye!
-Where's Gunda?
-In the bathroom.
Everyone had to fall.
You have to fall, too.
-No.
-You have to fall, too!
Everyone has to fall.
-Excellent.
-I'm not high like you, Adams.
Neither am I.
I'm just pretending.
Oh, we're kinda like spies?
Oh, drugs! Yes, so cool!
Like this, yes?
Doing drugs is so cool!
Funny!
Adams.
Did you give some to them, too?
Gunda, thank you, we cannot,
we're spies.
Cover for us.
-Adams!
-Yes?
How do you know
that we're not in a simulation?
Because, according to generally accepted
facts, we are in symphatization.
Symphatization.
Symphatization, symphatization...
How do you get to symphatization, Adams?
How do you get to symphatisation?
Look at the couch.
Who's got a light?
Thank you.
I had an amazing dream yesterday.
I... I...
was climbing up this mountain,
I was carrying you on my arms.
-Carrying Gunda?
-Yes.
-On your arms?
-White butterflies were flying around.
You had a white dress.
The sun was shining and the butterflies
made a beautiful crown for you.
-A beautiful dream.
-Yesterday?
-At night, yes.
-At night?
We went home at eight in the morning.
You know,
it was probably daydreaming.
It can happen.
Sure, it can.
Cool dream.
Strong symbols, I believe.
Strong symbols...
Go, Robert!
I think that from now on
I could wear sneakers like this.
It's easier.
You just slip in, slip out.
No need to bother too much.
-Snort in, snort out.
-Snort in, snort out!
-Where are you going?
-Home.
Do you have a filter, tobacco,
or a cigarette?
I don't smoke, Adams.
Ok, do you have a light?
I think you took mine.
But you don't smoke.
Yes.
-Gunda, would you give me a cigarette?
-I don't have any.
Who smokes anyway, Adams?
Me. Me. Me.
It's a bye?
Bye...
Want one?
Oh, it's here.
Can I get out that way?
I wanted to show you something.
Here? -Upstairs. At my place.
Ok, let's go.
-Should I close the door?
-Yes, you can.
-Can we smoke?
-Yes.
With honey?
I should get going.
I just received a message, well...
Nothing to worry about but it'd be good
to go soon as possible...
Good morning!
Good morning!
What's his name?
-Snob.
-Hey, Snob!
I'm Laine.
I'm sorry.
Can anyone let me out?
-During which class did it happen?
-Math.
-You had a test?
-No.
And what did the teacher say?
She was very angry.
She tried to call dad,
but he wouldn't pick up.
Why was she angry?
You know why.
Fine. I just think that's no reason
to be mad at you.
You didn't do anything wrong.
-Are these your sports pants?
-Yes.
Okay.
This place is like, I don't know...
It's such a mess.
No one has called the cleaning lady.
It's full of dust.
Yes, yes, dirty!
What did you expect?
To find it clean?
Enough already. You know,
I also don't want to toil...
Hello, Laine!
Dad.
Can you come aside for a second?
-Did the school call you?
-Yes.
-Did you pick up?
-No.
-Where's the make-up bag?
-In the other drawer.
Yes, okay.
-Couldn't you call them back?
-I could, but I didn't. I forgot.
-Budzis should see a doctor.
-I'll make an appointment.
Will you?
-Laine, this is from your mom.
-Thank you.
Why didn't you tell me anything?
It's very hard to tell you something
when you're not at home.
When you leave your house
for a longer time,
you may expect to see something changed
when you come back.
You got matches. Isn't it amazing?
Why do I have to talk
to the school staff?
You don't.
Tell them I'll call them back.
-I'm sorry, the steamer's mine.
-Yes?
-Yes. Can I, for a moment? Can I?
-Yes, please.
Yes.
-How's school?
-Not too bad.
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
Thank you.
Ok, I've done everything.
...four, five, six...
-Hi .
-Hi.
Where are you now?
I'm... at work. At work.
The rehearsal just ended.
-Did it go well?
-Yes, yes .
They like me.
How are you?
I don't know. Your things were taken away
today and no one had told me anything.
It was a bit weird.
We didn't want to... upset...
What?
We didn't want to upset your
brother yet.
Yes, but you could have told me.
You know... I don't know yet.
Budzis could live with me in August.
I don't know if that's a good idea.
He's already having a tough time here.
What will happen when...
He goes somewhere now...
Isn't it going to be a bit chaotic?
He'll be with me.
And school won't have started yet.
Will you be gone for that long?
They're offering me... to stay longer.
Experience and...
Right,
while you're getting experience,
we're having a different
kind of experience.
It's just for a while, you know.
Just for a while.
You know, my phone is dying.
We should...
Wait? Will you call me again?
Or I'll call you.
It's dying, it'll turn off any minute,
so it would be better to...
Yes? Bye!
-Bye, but...
-Bye-bye!
Laine. Bye!
Don't burn down the house, ok?
Bye!
-Bye!
-Bye!
Did you have good time with him?
You were comfortable and...
Well...
His name is Karlis.
Karlis is very cute.
Yes... not that cute.
What? No, Karlis is cute, come on.
Okay.
He's not too smart.
My mom really liked him.
-Your mom!
-Not like that!
My mom was totally
disappointed in me.
When it was clear, that her kid
is not going to be a dancer.
And Karlis did folk-dances.
And my mom couldn't believe it.
Laine is with a guy who dances!
Beautiful freckles.
Thank you.
My nose is bleeding.
For the last three years
I've felt as if...
in some sort of a loop.
Going in circles. Nothing changes.
This year I was expecting the same.
But...
Thankfully something new came along.
Something I didn't expect.
But...
I think I was so used to...
What time is it?
Fifteen to eight.
Morning shift is coming.
We gotta go. Now.
Quickly.
Hold the bottle.
Come on, come on.
Fuck.
I don't want it, thank you.
You know what?
The coke in Riga sucks.
When the DJs from Berlin come over...
-Lift up your arms a bit.
-Next week it's the ones from Tbilisi.
Yes, also when they come over.
Really.
They need to get some decent stuff...
What you can get in Riga sucks so much
that I don't even want to bother.
Because it's not in demand?
With the locals or...
No, it's just crap...
-Masha.
-What?
Wait, I can't now,
I'm taking measures.
-Let's go for a swim.
-No. I don't want to.
-Let's go.
-No! Let me go!
Yes. I'm ok.
You ok?
-You ok?
-Yes.
Let's go for a swim.
Let's do something else?
Sure! Like break in houses of strangers.
-Houses of strangers?
-They're no strangers.
Then why do we have to break in?
-They're not there?
-They aren't home.
-We'll just visit.
-What about the neighbours?
-Nothing, there are no neighbours.
-I'm not going.
Is it far from here?
It's right there.
-Maybe you can wait for us?
-Yes, wait for us.
I'll go to Riga.
We'll wait for you at the beach.
Laine?
You won't take any?
-Go, go!
-Fuck!
Couldn't you do a proper line?
Spoon.
-Come on, a half.
-Come on, Gunda. I can't...
Try it. I can make one for myself.
Take a half.
-My brain is already full of this shit.
-That's not even a half.
Fuck you!
Gunda, we have to call the police.
-There's no point.
-There's no point?
Yes.
When Masha went to report on rape,
they didn't give a shit about it.
Because she had been drinking.
We'll just get in more trouble.
Behaviour of the boy reflects
what's happening in the family.
It's a reflection. That's why I'm asking
what's happening in your family.
-Are you going through a divorce?
-No, no!
Where is mom? Where is dad?
Mom is abroad right now,
but it's not permanent.
For how long?
-Well, she has just...
-Just?
Excuse me, this phone has been off
for quite a while already.
-What does "just" mean?
-Maybe you have the wrong number?
And the father? Where is the father?
The father is at home and...
At home. But why can't he answer
to at least one message?
There isn't just a SMS
saying "please, call me back",
but there are actual issues
where his involvement
is obviously needed.
Hey, listen, are you doing
this to make some point?
Budzis, I'm sorry, it's just...
You can't just smash the tram window.
Get it?
Hey!
Well? What's up?
Should I text you about it?
-About what?
-About what's up.
-There was a parent-teacher conference.
-Cool, cool.
There's a nuance in these words.
It's a parent-teacher conference,
not brother and sister conference.
You know that I hate
parent-teacher conferences.
Your mom used to go to
the parent-teacher conferences.
I can't. Everyone talks about themselves.
And everyone worries about their child.
Pointless.
Haven't you heard that you
sometimes have to do things
that you don't want to do?
Yes.
So what did they tell
in that parent-teacher conference?
I don't get it. Why do I have to...
You can skip the conferences,
because you hate them,
but I have to go and listen?
-Because you know...
-You don't have to go to conferences.
If no one attends them
who will listen to this: "You know..."
Listen to me! Listen to me!
-Now listen to me.
-Yes.
I have to listen to: "You know,
Budzis this and Budzis that,
he doesn't behave.
What's going on in your family?
Do you know that
the child's behaviour reflects..."
You don't have to listen
and answer to these kind of questions,
it's not your responsibility.
-It's Budzis' life.
-Budzis' life is not your life.
-And it's not yours either?
-Well...
Wasn't it enough to make one child
that you can't take care of,
no, you got to make one more
about who... like... just...
You make a child and then
you let him be on his own,
it doesn't concern me,
it doesn't concern his sister...
Budzis, go upstairs, please!
-What's that all about?
-What?
I asked him to go upstairs.
You want him... Budzis, come back!
Dad, are you an idiot?
Your sister wants to
lecture us on upbringing.
-Are you an idiot?
-Who is an idiot?
-Why?
-Looks like you're an idiot.
Why? Do you want him to come
and listen what we're talking?
No, I don't want him to listen.
It's not normal just to say:
"Oh, it would be cool...
Nothing happened, just leave."
Start crying now.
We'll have a quality conversation.
-I hate you, dad. You know that?
-Great! Just great!
It's... it's good news. It's...
I hate you and I also hate mom.
-Great, yes!
-Send her my regards, ok?
-The first thing I do.
-When you talk the next time.
A proper grown-up conversation,
everyone's crying.
Everyone hates each other.
After graduating from high school,
I didn't know what to do with my life.
I stayed home for half a year,
smoking and playing PS4,
I didn't go out at all.
Then I had a good shroom trip.
Then I understood
that there's no point in being afraid.
What were you afraid of before?
From some consequences, you know...
thinking about what's going
to happen...
When I started tripping,
all that fear left me.
I understood that I had been living
in some kind of a labyrinth.
Running around like a rat.
Had a good time?
And what do you do
when you don't party?
We fuck.
Not with each other.
I'll call him and tell.
Hello?
-Yes, but...
-Are you ok?
But don't be angry with him, ok?
I think he's really...
I'm already mad at him and we fight.
I'm not going to be mad at him.
I'll try not to be mad.
-Well...
-How are you doing?
You're strong and coping with everything.
I know. I can see it.
-I'm not coping with everything, mom.
-You smoke too much.
Hey.
Your ball is very cool.
Have you thought
about practicing again?
You were very good at it.
I think so.
Budzis!
Listen, I'm sorry about
what happened.
It was really stupid.
We're both sorry, dad and me.
I won't do that again, I promise.
It wasn't cool to say all those things.
Buddy.
Listen, fuck you!
Ezera, you have one seminar missing.
If you want to pass,
you'll have to do it.
When can I do it?
-Friday, for example.
-Ok.
At two.
Oh, I'm sorry.
-Hey!
-Hey.
How are you?
Fine.
I didn't know you smoke.
Can I have one?
Are you ok?
-Really?
-Yup.
-You look kind of shitty.
-Thank you.
I'm serious.
-Has anything happened?
-No.
Is Budzis fine?
Yes, Budzis is fine.
-Really?
-Yes.
Wait, Laine.
Are you seeing someone else?
Maybe.
That's why you're wearing
all this make-up?
That's why you're wearing
all this make-up?
-I'm not.
-Well, neither am fucking I.
-Are you together with that girl?
-Yes, I'm together with that girl.
The sun will rise tomorrow.
It's a hypothesis.
It means we're uncertain that it will.
If one thing happens,
it doesn't make another thing
to happen.
The sun will rise tomorrow.
It's a hypothesis.
It is just a logical necessity.
It is just a logical necessity.
The sun will rise tomorrow.
It's a hypothesis.
It means we're uncertain that it will.
We're uncertain that it will.
I'll go and get my jacket.
Where are you going?
Hey! Hey!
-Are you sure?
-Yes, please...
Ok, wait. Wait, wait.
We have to walk slower.
-Got a cig?
-Yes.
It's the last one, take it.
And a light?
Shit, I think I don't have it.
Are you laughing?
Where are we going?
Masha, where are we going?
-Just going somewhere.
-Wait, wait.
Easy. Let's just be calm, ok?
-No, but this is totally fucked up.
-Pretty okay, yeah.
I think we can walk faster.
Listen. Wanna see something?
In three... two... one... smash!
-What are we going to do?
-It'll be fine.
What if someone saw it?
What if someone saw me?
Fuck! We're running.
Ok, listen.
Let's just calm the fuck down, ok?
Ok. Easy.
Every time it's like
I'm looking at the page
and the text is sliding away,
and I don't understand anything.
I just think to myself:
"Ok, Laine, let's focus. Come on!"
Now it's like this all the time
and I don't know what to do.
Yeah, listen, Laine,
I think I'll call it a night.
It's enough for me. Take the wine.
Let me know if you hear from Gunda.
Ok, bye.
-Will you?
-Yes.
Gunda.
Let me in, please.
Gunda, I hear that you're in there.
Great location.
One?
Doing halves?
I keep texting and calling Gunda,
and she doesn't respond.
It's Gunda, that's what she does.
She'll call you when she feels like it.
And she's probably at her parents' place.
I think so.
I thought that you could maybe
give me your key.
You got in the other day.
Maybe she expects something like that.
I don't think Gunda would like it.
What?
I think we could make out now.
You're eating an apple.
I said it as a joke.
Adams... Just...
Making out is one thing, but...
It was stupid.
Adams!
Adams, please!
Adams, what do you want from me?
You just don't feel about me
the way I feel about you.
But it doesn't mean that there are
no feelings whatsoever.
Adams?
-Adams!
-What?
Can you put on the song
from the hairdressers?
I'll put on another one.
Can you stop it?
Leave Snob alone.
Adams, the neighbour
called me at 7 AM
saying that there's music
coming from the apartment.
How many times can I tell you
that this is not a place for partied?
I'm not holding parties here.
-Here's your sandwich.
-Thank you.
-Go to bed.
-Snob!
-I'm not sleepy.
-I told you to go to bed.
I'm not sleepy, I'm not sleepy.
-Go to sleep, you look terrible.
-Thanks, mom.
-You're welcome, no problem.
-How sweet.
Take off that cap.
-What's up with you? Are you ok?
-Yes.
Why aren't you eating
your sandwiches then?
There really weren't many of us.
-What's your name?
-Laine.
Ok. Laine can stay with us.
Who brought this?
I did.
Are you a good girl?
-Probably not.
-And who brought this?
Masha.
-She's a bad girl.
-A really bad girl.
-Very bad.
-Really. A bad girl.
Adams doesn't use any of this.
It wasn't meant to be here.
Just go to bed.
What are you laughing about?
I didn't know you smoke.
See, Inara gave them to me.
-Mom, you know it's bad for you?
-It's very bad.
-Inara is a bad girl.
-Exactly. A very bad girl.
A very bad girl.
Is this stuff any good?
What are you laughing about?
I'm asking you if it's good, clean stuff?
-It is.
-Smells disgusting.
Stop it, I had a terrible night shift.
It definitely helps
against bad night shifts.
Budzis!
It's time to get up for school, ok?
What a blanket.
Come on, come on.
Listen.
One serious matter, ok?
We'll no longer keep your medicine
in the drawer,
but in this box.
Look, ok? This box.
Have you ever ripped
someone's heart out?
And put metal instead?
And then medicine?
Listen.
One pill during lunch at school, ok?
And one before going to bed.
They look same, ok?
In this box.
They'll be in your room.
How do you understand the statement,
"a consequently realised solipsism
is equal to true realism"?
I understand it as a difficult statement.
And the meaning of it?
Inscrutable.
Beautiful. I don't think
we're getting anywhere today.
-I'm sorry.
-Yes.
Wednesday, at three then?
Let's try again.
Laine!
Laine, can you help me with maths?
I don't know maths.
But how? You're a grownup,
you should know.
I should, but I don't.
And I'm not a grownup.
I failed an exam.
How come?
-You want me to talk to the professor?
-No, it's nothing like that.
I'll just do it again.
Ok, I'll go now.
-Bye!
-Bye!
Are you here alone?
Yes, so what?
Aren't you afraid?
Don't you want to stretch your legs?
You know what?
I'm not into boys, sorry.
It's ok, neither are we.
-Let's go outside?
-Do you have a painkiller?
You ok?
My phone died.
And where are you going now?
Let me call a cab.
-Got a cigarette?
-Yes.
-Thank you.
-You don't want to stay over at my place?
I'm home already.
Is your dad home?
It's just that noise.
It's from Budzis' room.
Wait, is he home alone?
Yes, maybe it's a cartoon
or something.
At 4 AM?
Can you wait a second?
I'll be right back.
-Ok.
-Yeah? Just, please wait.
Budzis. Budzis. Budzis!
Fuck.
Shit.
Fucking shit.
For how long has he been like this?
I called you as soon as I found him.
-Has he been sick?
-No, not lately.
-Hello? What's his name?
-Bruno.
Bruno! Wake up, Bruno!
-Could it be pills?
-He uses some medicine.
-What kind?
-I don't know exactly.
-Sugar? Cramps?
-No, nothing like that.
-Drugs?
-No, no.
-That couldn't be it?
-No.
Bruno! Wake up.
We'll check blood sugar as well.
Can you reach it?
-Can I stay?
-Yes, you don't bother us.
Everything's fine.
Bruno!
Wake up, Bruno!
-What's up in the corner?
-Nothing.
-Is your brother still asleep?
-Yes, he's still asleep.
It's my fault, dad.
I could have been there but I wasn't,
and when I found him
he was already like that, and...
We called the ambulance right away.
Stop it.
-It's not your fault.
-It is.
You ok?
-How are you holding up?
-Fine.
Fine...
According to the situation.
I'm not feeling fine at all.
Because...
I somehow cope with...
No, I don't. I tried
coping with mom's duties...
Now I feel like I have to be dad, too.
And I can't manage any of this, and
I'm not even a decent sister to Budzis.
I'm just failing at everything.
Honestly, I don't even know
if I'm trying anymore.
You don't have to be his mom or dad.
I don't understand anything.
Ok, I'm sorry.
I just wish we could sometimes talk.
Without saying that we're doing fine
if we're not doing fine.
Understand?
I also want to help you.
I wish we could help each other.
Breakfast?
I really don't want
to make breakfast right now.
No, I was thinking
that I could make breakfast.
You want some?
Yes, ok.
Can I have a smoke?
Hey, dad?
Thank you.
Let's go back to Wittgenstein,
shall we?
What does the tractatus end with?
What's the sentence?
"Whereof one cannot speak,
thereof one must be silent."
And what does it start with?
I don't remember precisely.
Look here.
"The world is anything that happens."
Do you agree?
I guess.
Ok, you can read.
I'll give you a C today.
-Thank you.
-Thank you.
But do you have any friends?
-Well... more like half-friends.
-What do you mean?
I have a good relationship with them.
Maybe they don't spend
much time with me...
but they're my friends.
Do they have other, closer friends?
Yes.
That's true.
-Do you spend a lot of time alone?
-Yes.
But it's... it's not bad, right?
It's not so bad.
When I was your age,
I didn't have any friends.
Much worse than me.
Now I have some friends.
I don't know. I don't think it's bad
if you only have few friends.
Or no friends at all. Sometimes.
That depends on
what kind of a person you are.
Whether you like to be alone
or you enjoy company.