No Time to Spy: A Loud House Movie (2024) Movie Script

[electricity crackling]
[triumphant music]
[bell dings]
[wind howling]
[dramatic music]

[lasers blasting]
Hey, watch it!
This is a lease!
I think it's time we
go our separate ways.
Agent 28, what are you doing?
What I do best. Improvising.
[lasers blasting]

- [grunts]
Can you be a doll
and open that door
over there for me?
Ah! Ah! [rifle pulses]
Thanks, hon.
X, I'm in.
And only 23 seconds.
I owe you lunch, Myrtle.
Actually, it was 22.5.
But what's a half a
second between gal pals?
So what's the situation?
You should have a straight shot
to Dr. Dufu's rocket.
I checked the visuals,
and it's all clear.
Are you sure?
There's got to be at
least one more henchman.
Have I ever steered you wrong?
Ooh. My bad.
[all grunting]
Ow! Ugh.

[both grunting]
Facial access granted.
[soft dramatic music]
[technology whirring]
[dramatic music]

Oh, hello, Agent 28.
I was wondering
when you'd get here.
I must say, I'm flattered
they sent the best.
Don't get too excited.
It's gonna be a quick visit!

- [laughs]
- [gasps]
What do you think of
my most loyal henchman?
Ham Hand.
He came to me after his hand
was crushed in a
wrestling match,
so I forged him a hammer hand.
I think his name is confusing.
[spits] I expected pork.
I thought you'd be tougher
than this, Agent 28.
And not a curl out of place.
Oh, will you please stop
talking about the hair?
It's always about the hair.
[devices humming]
So what's the deal with
your dumb rocket anyway?
You see those lasers?
[electricity crackles]
This rocket will take out
every communication
satellite on Earth.
And then I launch my own.
Dufu TV, Dufu Phone,
Dufu Electric,
Dufu Daily News!
My beautiful wife
Schmoofy Doofy and I
will own all communication
and rule the world!
T minus one minute until lunch.
Not today, doofus.
I've got lunch plans.
It's pronounced
Dufu. It's French!
- Ha!
- Hey, get back in your cage.
- [grunts]
- Hold still.
- Ah!
Hey, you messed
up Ham Hand's do.
Well, let me fix that for you.
[electricity crackling]
Oh, no, stop it!
Give me it! Hey!
- Ow!
- Ugh!
I know I just tried to kill you,
but get me out of here!
[alarm blaring]
You need to shut
down the launch.
Yep, working on it.
You stopped the
lasers, not the launch.
Three, two, one.
[rocket rumbling]
- No!

X, how do we get
doofus back down?
You won't be seeing him again.
That rocket is a one
way ticket into orbit.
Well, that's a shame.
But at least he got
a room with a view.
That was your best
Myrtle spy story yet.
Ten out of ten on
the showmanship.
Thanks, Clyde.
I can't wait to have a
secret agent for a Gran-Gran.
Just think... jet
setting across the world,
going on spy missions
together, doing dropkicks.
You're seriously about to
have the coolest grandma ever.
Don't tell Nana
Gale I said that.
[whistles] Look
alive, Loud crowd.
I'm here, and I'm
ready to load bags.
Who's getting married?
[together] We're
getting married.
Perfect timing.
I was just telling
Clyde about the time
you saved the world
from Dr. Dufu.
Oh Lincoln, that was ages ago.
All I can think about
right now is the wedding.
I'm about to marry
the man of my dreams
and finally have a family.
Speaking of the wedding,
if any spy business goes down
this weekend and you need help,
I'm your man.
Actually, I do need your help.
With a super important mission.
That only you can do.
Operation wedding rings.
I need you to guard
these with your life.
Oh, I thought you
were gonna ask me
to go on a real mission.
Oh, honey, this is real.
They aren't insured.
I'm gonna head out, Lincoln.
[together] Hoo, ha, huh.
Have fun at the wedding.
Let's kick it into gear, kiddos.
Butts need to be in
Vanzilla in 10 minutes.
[clattering and screaming]
[all yelling]
- Hey, watch it.
I can't find anything.
Has anyone seen my
vacation coffin?
Now to pack the essentials.
David Steele fart spray.
David Steele grappling hook.
David Steele throwing stars.
Oh, those are sharp.
Hm, I feel like I'm forgetting
something important.
Of course.
My David Steele spy watch.
- [barks]
Lincoln, I'm flower
girling here.
Drop it. We don't
have time to play.
- Hey, watch it, Stinkoln.
- [barking]
- Get back here.
- Now, where were we?
3, 23, hut, hut, hut.
- [gasping]
Lynn, don't throw so hard.
You want to catch
Myrtle's flowers or not?
It's called a bouquet, and duh.
Whoever catches it
totes gets married next.
Oh, can you imagine
Bobby and I's wedding?
LJ, where's your suitcase?
Don't need one.
Yeah, I'm wearing
all the underwear
I plan on taking.
- [laughs]
That's clever, wow.
- Heads up, Pops.
Here's Lily's bag.
- No, no, no, no! Ah!
Nice catch, Loud. Hello.
I'm here to watch
your dang house.
Mr. Grouse, as our
acting groundskeeper,
I need you to keep a
watchful eye on this.
What? Is that a TV remote?
[chuckles] Don't
make me laugh.
[device chirps]

My nuclear fusion laser.
My rivals have been
eyeing it for months.
Guard it with your life and
by no means press any...
How do I get the news on here?
[laser pulses]
[satellite crashes]
You owe an apology to the
country of Finlandistan.
Get back here with
my watch, Charles.
This is a collectible.
[laser pulses]
[satellite crashes]
[car alarm wailing]
My house!
Well, look at the bright side.
Now you have satellite TV.
All packed.
You got our wedding rings
in there, right kiddo?
The wedding rings?
Right. Uh, they
must be in my room.
Be right back.
- All right, kids, time to go.
[all yelling]
- Ugh.
Initiating vacation mode.
Lincoln, come on.
We're gonna be late.
I got the rings.
I'm coming, baby!
[dramatic pop music]
There's never a
moment for action
For a spy that is
prone to distraction
And the clock is a lie
As you just watch
the hours fly by
There's just
no time to spy
No time to spy
No time to laugh,
love, or cry
There's just
no time to spy

[upbeat music]
[all yelling]
Adorable kids.
Are all of them yours?
Different mothers,
I assume. I'm Fifi.
Oh, hi. I'm Lin.
Sorry, I get a
little plane sick.
[chuckles] Oh.
[strums guitar] Ah!
Lily, that's not a diving board.
How's it going, sweetie?
- Never better.
I can taste other
people's breath.
[quietly humming melody]
- Yo, Lori, heads up.
- Lynn.
I said not on the plane.
Ooh, tie-dye.
Oh, how about a couple's
massage on the beach, huh?
[stomach rumbles]
Oh, never eat the
airplane sashimi.
Oh. I'll be right back.
Is there something
in your eye, hon?
No, I just wanted
to let you know.
I've located the exits
in case an evil villain
is hiding in the cargo hold
waiting to take us captive.
Oh, honey, there's no bad guys
on this plane, and trust me,
if there were, you
don't want to meet them.
It's not all fun and games like
your picture book Derek Stump.
David Steele.
There are real consequences
to spy life, dangerous ones.
But you're just a kid,
and I don't expect
you to get it.
Hey, did that Stump fellow
ever throw a villain
off Mount Everest
while deliriously low
on oxygen? Cause I did.
Whoa, really?
So there I was
in-hand-to hand combat
at the highest peak
and slowly losing consciousness.
The odds of me
making it out alive
were slim to none.
Whoops. Coming through.
Hey, what's wrong, Al?
Well, sometimes hearing
about Myrtle's past
makes me worry, maybe I'm not
exciting enough for her.
Maybe I'm a little small
potatoes, you know?
Al, that's ridiculous.
You're not a small potato.
Who just won Sunset Canyon's
shuffleboard showdown?
Oh, yeah.
That guy's incredible.
And that's why I
love free napkins.
Never know when
they'll save your life.
Well, enough about that.
Let's go over the
wedding playlist.
Psst, Gran-Gran, I'm pretty sure
that flight attendant
is listening to us.
Sweetie, you're being silly.
I bet she's undercover,
gathering intel on us.
Oh, no, I ate the peanuts.
There's probably a tracking
device in my stomach.
I really, really don't think so.
Lincoln, you already
have a mission.
You still got those rings?
- Don't worry.
They're safe inside the box.
I'm going back to my
seat to read comics.
Lori, go long. Hut, hut, hut.
Oh, cold, cold!
Oh, is that citrus?
Oh, it's a deep burn.
Sorry about that. Lori
doesn't know how to catch.
- Lynn.
- Way to make enemies already.
Relax. We'll never
see her again.
So we're staying
at the same place.
[relaxing tropical music]

[bird caws]

[together] Ooh!


[all cheering]
[together] Ooh.
Welcome to the
Thunderball Resort.
Can I get you a hot towel?
- Lori, think fast.
- Stop it, Lynn.
- [laughs]
- Ahem.
That'll be 20 big ones
for the hot towel.
Yo, Mom, this sounds
like a you problem.
You know, you bear a
striking resemblance
to someone. Do you
know a Flip Phillipini?
I sure do.
I'm Flap Phillipini.
Flip's my cousin.
Huh. What are the chances?
One in one billion, five...
Charge it to the room, Flap.
[blows raspberry]
I have you all checked in.
Ceviche, can I get these
people some keys, please?
Thank you, Ceviche.
OK, girls, let's
head to the pool
and plan the bachelorette
party for tonight.
Don't forget about Todd, y'all.
I'm gonna go meet
with the caterer
and go over the menu.
And I was planning on
taking my Myrtle buns
on a surprise fishing
trip. Surprise!
Oh, Al. How romantic.
Ooh, you guys are
going on a boat?
That sounds awesome.
Oh, did you want
to come, Lincoln?
I don't have
anything else to do.
I'll go grab my spy stuff.
Lincoln, you don't need it.
Don't you kids go
anywhere without me.
Hey, watch it, kid.
You wouldn't want to bump into
the wrong guy on this island.
Yeah, yeah, I got it.
The truck's all loaded
for, uh, the fishing trip.
[upbeat music]
Oh, all right, Myrtle dove.
Time to catch us some dinner.
[soft dramatic music]
No sign of mohawk
man, but my spy sense
is at a level five tingle.
Lincoln, honey, let
the spy stuff go.
Come have a juice spritzer.
Be right there.

Whoa, there he is.
My spy sense was right.
There's something going on.
I wonder what's in those crates.
My David Steele
waterproof camera.
What is that name? Rubin.
Not good.
Very not good.
You know, in my Navy days,
I used to fish with a spear.
Oh, Al. That's so rugged.
- Gran-Gran, can I talk to you?
Oh. I got a big
one on the line.
Lincoln, get your camera.
OK, Pop-Pop. Will do.
So I just saw these bad guys
exchanging money for something.
I don't know what,
but they saw me take
a picture, and now they're...
- Lincoln, please.
There are no bad
guys around here.
[tense music]
Dang it.
Give us the little boy's camera,
and no one gets hurt, grandma.
Listen, cargo shorts,
I go by Gran-Gran.
Whatever. Boys.
[both growl]
Oh, man, a real life spy fight.
Take this, chum bucket.
- Huh?
- [grunts]
Until I slip this town

My love's no hand-me-down
All right, kid, hand it over.
[gasps] [screams]
- [grunting]
- Ha!
- [screaming]
- I know, I'm excited too.
Get that camera.
- Gotcha.
- That's it.
Play the games
- Hyah!
- [screams]
I should have called
in sick today.
- [growls]
- Huh?
Gonna make you
[both grunting]
- Get off.
[gasps] Lincoln!
[laughs] Got it.
As they'll all win alone

Oh, not what I meant to do.
That's right, fish.
Come to Pop-Pop.
Lincoln, hit the gas now.


Lonely times before

Aw, cheap lures.
Oh. Sorry, Al.
Lincoln needs aloe vera ASAP.
He's in sun shock.
OK, let's get my best
man back to the resort.
[seagull caws]
Oh, don't worry, Myrtle dove.
I'm gonna make up for
not catching anything.
Tonight, you'll
have the best table
at the best restaurant.
- Can't wait.
Um, I'll get some
cold towels for Linc.
Lincoln, now listen to me.
I know what you're gonna say.
It's too bad cargo
shorts fell in the ocean
with my camera, or
we'd have some clues.
What? No. We don't need clues.
We are leaving immediately.
[computer beeping]
Myrtle. Long time no talk.
What's it been, 30 years?
Sorry, X. No time to catch up.
Our fishing boat
was just attacked
after my fianc's grandson
witnessed a shady
deal going down.
I'm sending you our coordinates
so you can have an
agent check into it.
Myrtle, can you do it?
You're right there.
Yes, we accept the mission.
No, we do not accept.
Lincoln, zip it.
X, I retired, and I
have a family now.
I'm about to get married.
- I know.
And an invite would
have been classy,
but let's table that.
I'm sorry, but I have to
get us off this island
on the first flight tomorrow.
I'll call you when we're safe.
But Gran-Gran, think about it.
This is our chance to be heroes.
You and me, working together,
the ultimate spy duo.
Let's call her back.
- Lincoln, just stop it.
You don't understand
what it means
to be a real hero.
It's not about
ticking time bombs,
high-tech gadgets, and
invisible laser shields.
They make invisible
laser shields?
Being a hero is about sacrifice.
It's making a tough choice
even if you don't like it.
And right now that means
getting your family to safety.
Hey, party of...
- Oops.
Old habits die hard.
I better check on Flop.
I know what a hero is,
and they don't
turn down missions.
Hey, X, Myrtle here.
Totes changed my mind
about the mission, LOL.
We're on it.
Strong arm emoji,
high five emoji,
party emoji, and...
Stopped the bleeding,
but he'll definitely
need to ice that.
I'm sorry, Gran-Gran.
You were right about everything.
I'll go pack my stuff now.
Good. I knew I
could count on you.
I'll go talk to Pop-Pop.
And Lincoln, I'm proud of you
for handling this so well.
[dramatic music]
Yoo-hoo, white haired boy.
Oh, I was just
looking for sea glass
on the beach for my
dog jewelry business.
I make collars,
harnesses, cuff-links,
but I call them
ruff-links. [laughs]
Sorry, I don't have any cash.
Oh, you're a riot. A riot.
I'm not selling you.
I just found your camera.
It washed up on shore. I
also found cargo shorts.
I think I'll make
them into curtains.
[laughs] But with pockets.
Neat, huh?
- Thank you, thank you.
I can't believe you found it.
Oh, it's so cute how you wrote
"property of Lincoln
Loud, super spy."
You know, I used to play
spy when I was eight too.
Actually I'm 12,
but thanks again.
Just give me a call for
all your ruff-link...
ooh! [bird caws]
Apologies, Fifi.
I'm always practicing my
grave digging technique.
No worries. I'm OK.
Let me just try to stand up.
Oh. Nope.
Not gonna stand up.
[seagulls cawing]
Come on, pick up, pick up.
[phone ringing]
Hey Lincoln. How's
the wedding prep?
Clyde, I'm in the middle
of a spy operation,
and I need your help.
- Roger that.
I'll head to HQ.
Sorry, dads, I've
got some important
spy business to attend to.
Just stay hydrated!

[dog barks]

[car horn blares]
[whistling] Oh.
[eagle screeches]
[soft dramatic music]
[keys clacking]
Agent Loud, I'm in.
Clyde, our boat was attacked
after I snapped this photo.
It's in pretty bad shape,
but there might be
a clue in there.
Can you enhance it?
What does the crate say?

[together] Rubiner's.
Give me one second.
All right. Let's see.
Looks like there's a
restaurant on the island
called Rubiner's Fishmongers.
I'll send you a pin.
- Perfect.
I'll start there.
- Awesome.
Your first real spy
mission with Myrtle.
Uh, Gran-Gran's busy
prepping for the wedding,
so I'm going to take
on this mission solo.
Well, be careful.
And remember to stay hydrated.
[dramatic music]

[soft dramatic music]

[singing melody]
Al, whenever you're done
in there, we need to talk.
Okey dokey
You're gonna love this
restaurant, sweetie.
But I already asked
about the napkins,
and they're cloth, so
you can't take them.
Yeah, about that,
I don't think I'll
be making dinner.
I'm just so exhausted
from fishing.
I think I'm gonna lie down.
His little spy butt
is in so much trouble.
Maybe Lynn Sr. Will
have dinner with you.
Well, I'm not paying for
Lynn's 12 appetizers.
[clears throat]
We here at Thunderball Resort
would like to thank
you for staying with us
on your big day.
Please accept this gift
basket as a token of...
How'd you like to make
the best tip of your life?

Just pretend to be
me taking a nap,
and I'll be back in 20 minutes.
If anyone asks,
your name is Myrtle.
[dramatic music]

[soft dramatic music]

Rest up, honey.
You wouldn't want to miss out
on our cuddle under the stars.
See you soon, my
little Myrtle dove.
OK, well, I guess
that wasn't too bad.
[together] Bachelorette party!
Mom... can I call you
Mom? Why are you in bed?
Aren't you excited for
your bachelorette party?
Let's rock, Gran-Gran.
We have a limo parked out front.
Uh, I'm Myrtle?
I'd say that's a yes.
[all cheer]

[seagull squawks]

Welcome to Rubiner's, home
of the calamari safari.
[clears throat]
Steele, David
Steele, party of one.
Um, this is a restaurant,
not a daycare.
Sorry, kid.
Oh, Juan.
Fine, I guess I'll take
my patronage elsewhere.
[tools whirring]
Uh, I got a delivery
here from Juan.
[laughs] Those must be for me.
Next thing you know,
he's gonna propose,
but I'm too young for
that, so I'm gonna say no,
and then we'll wait a year,
and then I'll ask
him again to propose.
[sniffs] Juan.
Every little movement
Every little thing you do
Look, my sister
doesn't hate you.
That's just the
way her face looks.
[clears throat]
One flippy, not shaken
or stirred, please.
[tense music]
Uh... [gulps]
We don't serve flippies here.
But we serve floppees.
You're in for a treat.
Shake it up. Make
that floppee.
Make that floppee.
Make that floppee.
Yee! [growls]
- Yoo-hoo, Lincoln, over here.
It's me, Fifi.
I ordered the calamari safari,
and this thing is huge.
Come join me before
the clams get hot.
OK, shh.
[upbeat music]

Ta-da! Huh?
Ugh, you did it again, Randall.
You always push him away.
[party horn toots]
Go Myrtle, go Myrtle, go Myrtle.
Your bachelorette party
would not be complete
without some funky accessories.
Oh. [laughs]
And some games.
First up, how well
do you know Pop-Pop?
OK, first question.
What's Pop-Pop's favorite
steamed vegetable?
Uh, I'm Myrtle.
Ooh, so close. It's carrots.
[tires screeching]
This guy is so
not getting a tip.
Ah, these brakes are a doozy.
Everybody all right back here?
Flop? You're our driver?
The name's Louie, chiefs.
Louie's Limo and Lemonade.
Anybody want some?
I juice the lemons
with my tire jack.
Cut from the same
cloth as our Flip.
Hard pass on the
jacked lemonade.
Yo Louie, you know
any karaoke places?
I think it's time to
sing to the bride to be.
Oh, you betcha. And right!
Car candles is my
other business.
They're great for road trips
and legal in three states.
I'm famous for my fragrances.
Wet shower, yogurt in
a bowl, old pillows,
and of course, tar.
[device whines]
[people chewing]
Save me.
So my cousin's uncle's
brother's great, great aunt...
Oh, man, sorry I'm late.
Jerry wouldn't stop talking
about his cargo shorts.
Ugh, Jerry and his pockets.
But my funky foot
fungus fragrance,
that was my best seller.
Excuse me, Fifi, I have
some important business
to attend to.
[dramatic music]
Oh, are you on a top
secret spy mission?
[laughs] Have fun.
I mean...
[whispers] Have fun.
You say you want to
Learn how to robot
You go rah-ah-oh
Yay! [laughs]
All right, Todd, you're cut off.
Five songs is enough.
I can stop whenever I want.
We've got a bachelorette party
in the house tonight.
Let's bring the bride
to be up on stage
for a special performance.
[gulps] Oh no, no, no.
That's OK. Rain
check for Myrtle.
[chuckles nervously]
Come on.
This is your chance to shine.
[microphone feedback whines]
[upbeat music]
Ooh, girl, if I could
Ooh, girl, I give you
the... ooh, girl, world girl
Give you the...
Girl, boy world
And you, you
could be my girl
And I could be
your boy girl
[together] Girl
boy, ooh, girl
Boy, girl, ooh, girl
You're a girl
[together] My girl
And I'm a boy
[together] Ooh girl
What else do we need?
Just the world
Ooh, girl
I'm Myrtle.
[together] You're Myrtle.
And you wanted to
go to Rubiner's.
[soft dramatic music]
- Huh?
- [grunts]
We're running out of time.
Get these rocket
parts to Dufu now.
[together] Yes, sir.

[gasps] Ham Hand from
Gran-Gran's stories.
Well, we better get moving.
Yeah, last thing I need
is a hammer in the face.
Ow. Ooh, ugh. [groans]

Dang it. Where'd he go?
Lincoln, what are
you doing here?
Oh, phew. Gran-Gran, it's you.
I told you to drop
the spy stuff.
These people are dangerous. We
need to get out of here now.
Look, I'm sorry I
didn't listen to you,
but Ham Hand is here,
and he said something
about building a
rocket for Dufu.
What? Doofus is
back from space?
Yeah. And we have to stop him.
No, X is sending another agent,
and they can stop doofus.
Uh, so don't get mad,
but no one's coming.
- Is that my phone?
- Yeah.
I sort of borrowed it
and accepted the mission.
- What?
- I said don't get mad.
Don't worry. We got this.
You and I make a great team.
Hey, what are you doing here?
Wait a second. You're
the two from the boat.
David Steele fart spray.
- [screams]
- Nice move, huh?
Come on.
[tense music]
[diners screaming]
Lincoln, stay back.
David Steele throwing star.
- [growls]
- Room for dessert?
- Sweet burn, Gran-Gran.
- Come here.
[all grunting]
- Gazpacho in your face.
- Gross.
Get over here, kid.
- Ah! Ah!
Ah, ah, ah, ah!
- Ugh!
- Get her!
- [screams]
- Table for three?
Take that booth.

[growls] [grunts]
Crab cakes, table ten.
I can't see. Whoa!
- [grunting]
- Gotcha.
Who's hungry for more?


That was incredible.
Can we get a quick pic with
all the bodies behind me?
Not now. We gotta
get out of here.
Too late, chump burgers.
- Hiyah!
- Ow!
Excuse us.
- Sorry. Enjoy your meal.
Moped, 12 o'clock.
- Go, go, go.
- E-scooter?
What the heck is an e-scooter?
Download app. Scan
phone to activate?
Hang on, let me get my glasses.
- Uh...
- Over there!
Let's go, let's go,
let's go, let's go!
I'm downloading the app.
Ah! [phone chirps]
[scooter humming]
[engine revving]
- [growls]
- Whoa!
Do you think they'll
figure out the app?
I figured out the
app. Let's roll.
[suspenseful music]

[car horns blaring]

Hang on, sweetie.
We're gonna ditch these punks.
Huh? [screams]



- [growls]
- [screams]
Are they blasting at us?
Well, they're sure
not blowing us kisses.

Tranquilizer darts?
Don't worry, Gran-Gran,
I'll take care of this guy.
I've got it, Lincoln.
Just give me your phone.
Ugh. Yeah, great idea.
You can use my David
Steele distraction light.
- [grunts]

Lincoln, clothesline.

[tires screeching]

[together] Huh?
[both cheering]
Whoa, that was amazing.
We messed those
dudes up, Gran-Gran.
We sure did.

- Ah!
- Whoa!
- Ooh.
[gasps] Lincoln.
Ow. Huh?
You've got to get out of here.
But Gran-Gran...
Listen to me, you need to
get Pop-Pop and your family
off the island. I'll be fine.
Now go.
[tense music]

Oh, come on. All my
pictures were on there.
[chuckles] Agent
28, we meet again.
Hammy, long time no see.
Did your hair get thinner?
[laughs] Get the jokes in now.
Dufu got you front row
tickets for our main event,
and then I'm gonna put an
end to this little reunion.
Tie her up.
Sweep the area for
the wannabe spy.

Where is this kid?
Oh, no. So not
good. So not good.
Hey, I hear some panicking.
Over here.
- Ugh!
You check over there.
I'll check over here.
What do I do? What
would David Steele do?
Think, think, think.

[exhales deeply]
Just got to take this
one step at time.
Ow. [gasps]
They found me.
[muffled pop music]
Lincoln, we can see you.
Yeah, and you look terrible.
What are you doing out here?
Are you playing spy again?
Lori? Lola? Am I
glad to see you guys.
There's an evil doctor trying
to take over the world,
and his goons
captured Gran-Gran.
What are you talking about?
Myrtle is literally
in the limo with us.
[together] Go Myrtle.
Go Myrtle, go Myrtle.
- Gran-Gran? You escaped.
Are you catching everyone
up on our wild night?
What's the plan?
- Um, I'm Myrtle.
- Huh?
- [gasps]
[all gasp]
- [chuckles]
- Imposter.
Please don't hurt me.
Please don't hurt me.
Look, Myrtle
promised me a big tip
if I pretended to be her, so...
You're telling me we've
been buying drinks
all night for some rando?
I would have said
something earlier,
but I just got caught
up in being Myrtle.
It was so freeing.
I just got to say,
you're the most supportive
family I've ever met.
So Lincoln's ridiculous
story is true?
Lori, call Pop-Pop
and your father stat.
Mom, nobody makes
phone calls anymore.
It's all about the emojis.
- Just call them!
Flop, Louie, whatever
your name is,
take us to the
island police station
and step on it.
- OK.
But if anyone yacks
on the upholstery,
I got to charge a
$50 upchuck fee.
[tires squealing]
[retches] Oop,
that one was me.
But I'm still charging you.
[tires screech]
We need to see the chief ASAP.
You got him.
Chief Phillipini,
nice to meet youse.
How is he in so
many places at once?
That's not important.
My Myrtle was taken,
and we need you
to get her back chop-chop.
Oh, yeesh. That is a pickle.
But I got to wait 48
hours before filing
a missing persons report.
Hey, if you're looking
to kill a little time,
Ceviche and are doing
two nights of improv
at the Chuckle Condo.
Just make sure to lock
up on your way out.
There's a whole lot
of evidence in here.
Oh, I can't believe I
wasn't there to help her.
What kind of fianc am I?
What are we gonna do?
I know exactly
what we have to do.
We form an elite spy team
and go into the
jungle to save her.
That's what David
Steele would do.
Lincoln, we are so
not secret agents.
Yeah, Lori can't even catch.
- Ow. Lynn!
- See?
No, but I am,
and I can lead the way.
Besides, we're in the
middle of the ocean.
Nobody's coming, and
we're running out of time.
Who's with me?
- I am.
- Huh?
Lincoln's right.
It's us or no one. I'm in.
[all cheering]
That's a cute idea, guys.
But how are we supposed to
take down an army of henchmen?
Easy, we just need
the right equipment.
Meet me at the hotel business
center in the morning.
[soft dramatic music]
Welcome to my makeshift lab.
It's been tough without
the proper facilities,
but we're making do.
Todd, initiate Protocol Steele.
Affirmative, y'all.
[keyboard clacking]
[together] Ooh.
Is that "David
Steele" issue 479?
Keen observation, brother.
Taking a page from this comic,
I've whipped up a few
devices that should aid
in the kicking of some
serious villain posterior,
street name, butts.
For Leni, lightning
lemonade lipstick
capable of cutting any
and all types of material.
Ooh, a spring shade.
For you, Lily, this
special lollipop.
One lick, and an elephant
will be sleeping for hours.
- [snoring]
- [laughs]
For Lori, a pitching
wedge grappling hook
capable of holding
10,000 pounds.
What's this button
do? [screams]
And for the flower girl,
delicate and
destructive daffodils.
For Luan, a whoopee
cushion filled with Lynn's
post-meatball flatulence.
- Deadly. Wait, how did you...
Hydraulic knuckles for Pop-Pop.
That's the stuff.
And Lincoln, for you,
your David Steele watch
has now been reinforced
with stainless steel
and bulletproof carbon
as well as equipped
with a built in super magnet.
It's only got enough charge
for one use, so use it wisely.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
what's my device, Lisa?
What's my device, huh?
- Glad you asked, Father.
Whoa, pepper shakers. [gasps]
Do they talk? Explode? Oh,
I bet they're heat-seeking.
[laughs] Ah!

- [imitating engine humming]
- Uh, Lisa.
Don't worry. They're
just electric.
I don't want him hurting anyone,
including himself.
- [making zooming noises]
Dr. Dufu won't
know what hit him.
Let's go save Gran-Gran!
[all cheering]
In you go.
No, no, no, this is all wrong.
I requested a suite
with a king-size bed.
Keep joking, 28.
Dufu will get the
last laugh. [chuckles]
Like he isn't already
laughing at that caterpillar
under your nose.
- It's a timeless look, OK?
- Don't listen to her.
I think it's cute.
- Thanks, Rick.
You always know what to say.
Oh, Myrtle, you just can't
escape this life, can you?
[seagulls cawing]

Come on, guys.
I'm pretty sure
these tire tracks
will lead us right to Gran-Gran.
[all groan]

Wait. The tracks
just end here.
Oh, well that's just great.
We came all this way, and
now we're lost, Lincoln.
Lip balm, mothballs, and a hint
of those hard caramels
from the gas station.
That's Myrtle. She was here.
Come on, girl,
what do you smell?
- [barks]
- She's got the scent.
Huh. The scent goes cold here.
That's it.
That's where they
have Gran-Gran.
In "David Steele" issue 10,
Malice captured
David Steele's nephew
and held him hostage
in a mountain lair.
We just need to find a way in.
Hey, maybe those
guys can help us.
[gasps] Get down.
Howdy, Loudies!
[melodic horn blaring]
[all gasp]
Rented a buggy from the resort.
[revs engine]
Did you hear something?
Fifi, please stop.
Hey, it's that nosy white
haired kid from the boat.
Get him.
- Quick, follow me.
This thing really moves.
Sorry, we're commandeering this.
Hold on to your butts.
[engine revs]
See you soon.
[suspenseful music]
Go, go, go.

Did we lose them?
Coast is clear, Mom.
[together Whoa!
- [laughs]
- [screams]
Cliff approaching.
Hang on, kids.
[all screaming]

[all cheering]
More bad guys!
[all shouting aggressively]
Ugh, so dramatic.
I'll handle this.

[tires screeching]
- [screams]

[together] Huh?

[both growl]
- Ah!
- Mom, look out!

[tires screeching]

[tires screeching]
[together] Huh?
Where are we?
This must be the entrance
to Dr. Dufu's secret lair.
Let's go take it to him.
Not so fast, Pop-Pop.
Villain 101, any evil lair
is gonna be heavily guarded.
If we're gonna
breach this place,
we got to do it spy style.
[soft dramatic music]

- [clears throat]
- Huh?
[bright lullaby]
Uh, hello, baby.
Are you lost?
[breathes sharply]
Oh, thanks, but no thanks.
I'm trying to cut
back on my sweets.
No, wait, don't cry.
Look. See?
Oh, is that cinna...
Nice work, Lily.
Thank you.
Attention all security staff.
We have ten minutes
until the big launch.
[all gasp]
Also today is Tony's birthday,
so don't forget to sign
his card in the break room.
Guys, we got get
Gran-Gran quick.
Come on.
Look. A directory.
Let's see.
Aha, there's a jail
cell on the 10th floor.
That's where they'll
be keeping Gran-Gran.
It's jailbreak time, baby.
Be careful.
These places are usually
riddled with booby traps.
One wrong step and you...
- Uh, Lincoln.
[tense music]
Dang it.
[alarm blaring]
- Whoa!
- Oh!
That was close.
[gasps] Hey, what gives?
- Are you guys OK?
- We're fine.
We all know where to go.
Let's meet up at the jail cell.

T-minus ten minutes
until launch.
Think, Myrtle, think.
You can't let doofus
fire that rocket.
Free napkins.
Never know when
they'll save your life.
Ah, that's our way up.
But how do we get
those guys out of here?
[all gasp]

Hmm. We work in a nice place.
- I got this one.
- Huh?
Sorry to butt in, Tony.
Hmm, anyone here wear
a men's extra large?
I'm more of a snug medium.
Stop it. [yelps]
Hey, hey, fellas.
You henching hard
or hardly henching?
Hey, it's Tony.
Happy birthday, man.
Oh, thanks. You too.
Hey, wait, my birthday
is next Tuesday,
and the real Tony
would know that.
Uh, I didn't want
to have to do this,
but you left me no choice.
[shaker whirring]
- Ah, ah...
- Yah...
[both sneeze]
It's OK, kids.
Daddy saved us all.
Hiyah! [laughs]
All right, just a
straight shot to the top.
[bell dings]
Whoa, wait, why are we stopping?
I have an idea.
[together] Whoa!
[bell dings]
[light instrumental music]
Hey, Tony.
Someone's been really putting
away the birthday cake.
[laughs] Yeah,
well, you know me.
Tony can't help himself.
[soft dramatic music]

How are we gonna cross
without them seeing us?
We need to cut the lights.
On it.
- Huh?
- What?
[all screaming]
Stay close. I have
natural night vision.
Get your shoes out of my face.
Get your face out of my shoes.
Oxygen levels waning.
Need air.
You know, too much
birthday cake.
My very large, lumpy tummy.
[tense music]
Happy birthday, Tony.
[bell dings]
[together] Tony,
the birthday boy.
Let's all sing happy
birthday to Tony.
One, two, three.
Happy birthday to...
[all screaming]
Hey, I found a flashlight.
Nice. Turn that sucker on.
[all gasp]
Stay perfectly still.
Maybe they don't see us.

Dang it. Run!
[lasers blasting]
Shut the door!
[alarms blaring]
Hurry! We can make it!
[lasers blasting]
That's not good.
[all screaming]
[lasers blasting]
- Ugh.
- Oh.
[all groaning]
I got you, Lily!
[together] Happy
birthday to you
We gotta lose these guys.
Everybody hold your breath.
Here comes the meatball sub.
[together] You
smell like a monkey
[cushion flatulating]
[people coughing]
Happy birthday, Tony.
Ah, gross.
There must be a clog.
Dibs not fixing it.
- Dibs not fixing.
Ugh. Fine, I'll
get the plunger.
Jeez, lady.
Ever heard of fiber?
On your feet.
We got to transfer you while
we get this cleaned up.
Hey, I said...
[gasps] The pillow ploy.
I keep falling for that.
Got the plunger.
I brought the toilet
brush too just in case.
[dramatic music]

OK, where's doofus's rocket?
[blows raspberry]
A tough guy, huh?
Maybe we should try cleaning
that mouth of yours.
[screams] It's one floor up.

[bell dings]

Ah, slow down.
- [panting]
- Ah!

You guys made it! Yeah!
First ones here. We win!
Not a competition, Lynn,
but I love the enthusiasm.
[soft dramatic music]

I don't see my Myrtle anywhere.
Guys, something feels off.
My spy sense is going bananas.
[alarm blares]
[dramatic music]
Launch initiated.
I got to disarm this rocket.
[alarm blaring]
Access denied.
Master key required.
Master key required? [gasps]
Now coming to the ring,
fighting out of Topeka, Kansas.
He's 6'7", 320 pounds,
the prince of pummel,
he is...
- Ham Hand.
Didn't like your
room, old timer?
A little small for my tastes.
I like to spread my wings.

Now let's dance.
[both grunting]

Hold still.
- [screams]
- [gasps]
- [grunts]
- [grunts]
- Aha!
Time for your nap, grandma.
[tense music]
Ham Hand, heads up.
Looks like you've
got a clog, Hammy.
Al? Kids!
[together] Gran-Gran.
I'm gonna get you out of here.
Don't you worry.
- [gasps]
Gran-Gran, look out behind you.
- Huh?
- [laughs]
[all gasp]
- [clapping]
[together] Huh?
There you are, doofus.
It's pronounced Dufu.
[together] Fifi?
You don't remember me, Agent 28?
Because I remember you.
The day you ruined my life
will be etched in
my mind forever.
Good news, Roofy Floofy,
there was a hair in
the mashed potatoes,
so we got our sides for free.
- [groans]
I love mashed potatoes.
[alarm blaring]
[dramatic music]
- No!
- Rufus!
Well, that's a shame.
But at least he got
a room with a view.

[gasps] You're Schmoofy Doofy.
Very good, 28.
I stopped your husband
from taking over the world,
and I'll stop you too.
- [laughs]
I never planned to
take over the world.
That was all just a
ruse to get you here.
This is personal.
Roofy Floofy and I had our
whole future ahead of us.
And you snatched
that dream from me
by shooting him into space.
I didn't throw your
husband into that rocket.
He tripped and fell.
- Silence.
This is my monologue.
I've been waiting years
to exact my revenge,
and when I saw your little
wedding announcement
in the "Royal Woods
Gazette," I was elated.
I've been studying you
all for months now.
I know who's a genius.
I know who's creepy.
I even know who's
prone to flatulence.
Is it me?
'Cause this one's a
toss-up between Lori and I.
Stop it, Lynn.
But I needed a way to get close,
and I found it
with you, Lincoln.
A wittle boy playing spy.
I knew if I could lure
you into my spy game,
you wouldn't be able to resist.
Wait a sec.
You mean, the boat, the
restaurant, the dune buggy?
It was all a setup. [laughs]
I can't believe I fell for it.
I can.
You're just an
irresponsible child.
I mean, you couldn't
even take care
of a couple wedding rings.
You've led your loved
ones right into my trap.
[phone beeps]
Rocket armed.
You took away my
family, Agent 28,
and now I'm gonna
take away yours.
By launching them into space!
[alarm blaring]
[all screaming]
T-minus one minute until launch.
59, 58, 57...
Au revoir, Louds.
You're not going anywhere.
So just sit back
and enjoy the show.

Hey Hammy, your
bald spot's showing.
What? But wait,
I combed over it.
Hey. [growls]
Whoa! [all gasp]

Now, where were we?
Time for your nap.
Hold tight, kids.
If I can get doofus's phone,
I can stop the rocket.
[tender music]

[dramatic music]

I guess you won't
be needing these
since I'll be shooting
your fianc into space.
- [gasps]
- [laughs]
Oh, that felt good. Boop.
Toodles. Enjoy the show.
Too slow, doofus.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

30 seconds until launch.
[gasps] Ow.
[both grunting]

Gotcha. [screams]
I need that phone, Fifi.
Never. I must have my revenge.
We don't have time for this.
Give me the phone,
and I'll pull you up.

Come on, you're gonna fall.

- [laughs]
- No!
Three, two, one.
[mountain rumbling]

[alarm blaring]

OK, everybody, we need
to conserve oxygen.
[inhales deeply]
Forget that. Suck it down.
Oh, what's the point?
I'm never gonna see
my Myrtle again.
[metal clangs]
[gasps] Myrtle!
Oh, thank you.
We're saved. You brought
parachutes, right?
[soft dramatic music]
I'm sorry, Lynn,
I've got nothing.
I don't know if there's
a way back down.

This is all my fault.
No, Fifi was right.
I'm just a dumb kid playing spy.
I couldn't even keep
track of your rings.
I ruined the wedding
and our lives,
and now we're stuck up
here forever because of me.
[sobbing quietly]

Maybe not.
Once I was on a mission in Minsk
and had to escape
through the toilet
on a Trans-Siberian rail car.
Whoa. She just dead
lifted the john.
We can use the septic
tank as an escape pod.
We are still in the troposphere.
If we can seal off the tank,
we just may survive impact.
[all cheering]
There is, however, one problem.
Someone is gonna have to close
the tank from the outside.
You mean...
One of us isn't getting
off this rocket.
I'll do it.
[together] What?
- I got us into this mess.
- Absolutely not.
You're all family.
I'll stay behind.
Myrtle, you're part
of this family too.
I'm not, Al. I
can't marry you.
[together] Huh?
I love you, Al.
I love you all.
But it's like I told Lincoln.
The spy life has consequences.
I thought I could
escape my past,
but it'll always be there,
putting anyone I
care about at risk.
Uh, I don't want to
come off as insensitive,
but we've got to get
this show on the road.

[somber music]

Whoa. Oh!

I can't do this.
I don't want to live
a life without you.
Oh, my Al.
A gentleman till the end.
I'm so sorry.
[both gasps]
[dramatic music]
[together] Lincoln!
- Whoa!
- Ah!

Goodbye, everyone.
[together] No!

Ham Hand is invincible.
[all coughing]
Call the Air
Force. Radio NASA.
Does anyone know an astronaut?
- [sobbing]
[somber music]

Rita, Lynn, kids.
I have an idea.
We just need to get back
to the rocket console.
Five layers of love.
Yummy, dum, dum.
[soft dramatic music]
We've established a
connection with my laser,
but I only see one
viable satellite
that can course
correct the rocket.
It's moving fast, so
we've only got one shot.

Aha, right there.
It's the satellite.
Deploying laser.

[laughs] Behold the
power of science.
[laser pulses]
Impact successful.
[dramatic music]

Look, there he is!


That's my best man.
I'm coming, little buddy.


I should have
brought more coffins.
[all cheering]
How could that man ever
think he's small potatoes?
He's the biggest potato I know.
You... you... you...
Lori, think fast.
Thanks, Lana.
Pop-Pop, you saved me.
Aw, it was mostly Myrtle.
It was her plan to use my laser.
I couldn't have done
it without David Steele
and all of you.
No one in this family goes
at it alone, big brother.
[tender music]

Come on, Gran-Gran.
Get in here.
Really? Even
after all of this?
You heard Lisa.
This family always
sticks together,
even if a super villain and her
army of henchmen are after us.

Maybe I can have a family.
Does that mean...

Let's get married, Al.
- Yes!
- Yay!
[all cheering]
Uh, knock, knock.
You wanted to see me? Ooh. Ah.
I'm not looking. I promise.
Lincoln, that
wedding superstition
only applies to the groom.
I just want to
say, you were brave
to step up for your
family like that.
I'm so proud I get
to be your Gran-Gran.
Oh, I almost forgot.
These are for you.
I'm sorry they're not
the original rings.
They're made out of bamboo.
Oh, thank you.
These are beautiful.
Where'd you get them?
You'd be amazed what
a David Steele watch
is worth on this island.
But Lincoln, it's a collectible.
I know, but someone once told me
that there's more to spy
life than fancy gadgets,
and I think I'm starting to
understand what they meant.
Come here.
Just don't go jumping into
any rockets again without me.
And now I, Willie
of Willie's Weddings
and Wakes, pronounce you, Al,
and you, Myrtle, married.
Psst, the rings.
I knew we could count on you.
[bright music]

I love you, Myrtle dove.
Oh, Al.
[all cheering]
Come on, Gran-Gran!
[bright acoustic music]
It's bouquet time, baby.
Here, use this shrimp
as a mouth guard.
It could get ugly out there.

Use your body, Lori.
Out of the way. Yes!
[laughs] I got it.
X, you came.
Uh, who's X?
My boss.
Nice catch, blondie,
but if you ever tackle me again,
I'll make Bobby Boo
Boo Bear disappear
and have it look
like an accident.
Hold you close in my heart
Even when we're far apart
Where I go you
always follow
No need to worry
about tomorrow
If I fall, you'll
always catch me
We're one Loud house family
Where I go you
always follow
No need to worry
about tomorrow
If I fall, you'll
always catch me
We're one Loud house family

[clears throat]
Me and Ceviche were out
diving for buried treasure
when we found these two clowns.
Consider it a wedding gift.
Weddings always get me.
Knock it off with
the waterworks,
you muscle head.
You're leaking on me.
Oh, oh, oh!
Boy, they're going
away for a long time.
Oh, by the way, thanks for this
fancy new watch. Got
a lot of buttons.
Just take good care of it.
It's a collectible.
Collectible? Consider it sold.
Hey, everyone, let's get a
photo with my new family.
All right.
Let's see those big smiles.
Mission accomplished, Lincoln.
Mission accomplished, Gran-Gran.
Hold you close in my heart
even when we're far apart
Where I go you
always follow
No need to worry
about tomorrow
If I fall, you'll
always catch me
We're one Loud
house family
Where I go you
always follow
No need to worry
about tomorrow
If I fall, you'll
always catch me
We're one Loud
house family