Notice to Quit (2024) Movie Script
1
(fire crackling) (owl hooting)
(water sloshing) (insects chirping)
(frogs croaking)
(animal growling) (animals chittering)
(leopard growling)
(traffic droning) (birds chirping)
(engines rumbling)
(can clattering)
(spray hissing) (indicator beeping)
(crowd chattering)
(upbeat music)
- [Liz] Right, cool. So is
there anything I need to do?
- So you have two loads.
(speaks faintly)
- Mm-hmm.
- As always.
- Hey! Seems I've got to have
A change of scene
- Okay, I'll sign here.
Every night I have
The strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way
- Anna! Come on, I'm gonna be late.
Left here on my own
- Jay Cole?
It's Andy Singer, the, uh, realtor
who showed you the two-bed
last week on East 33rd?
Haven't heard from you
in a while, but I'm calling
because I got another spot
that doesn't have a leak
that I think you might like.
I'm here right now and uh, it's, uh,
it's got great light, huge windows.
But you know, these places, they go fast,
so gimme a call, okay?
Oh, no
If I'm feelin' all right
You feelin' all right
- What is that? Didn't I
tell you not to pick up trash?
- The snow leopard is sick at
the zoo and there's a protest.
- Well, that doesn't sound very safe.
- Did he tell you when
he was gonna be here?
- I tried calling him several times.
- You didn't tell him, did you?
Why are we even moving?
Florida is a shithole.
- Language! Hey, it's gonna be great.
Promise. We're gonna have more space.
- You promised you would call him, Mom.
I just can't waste my time
- I'll call him again from work,
and make sure he comes
to say goodbye tonight.
Okay? Just need you to
be a little more positive.
- Sure, I can be positive.
Positive that I'm gonna
suffocate in Florida.
- Okay. Please.
I need to get to work.
Oh, no
- God, it's so hot.
- You're moving us to a swamp.
Oh, no
Oh, no
You feelin' all right
- Right.
Oh, no
I'm not feelin' too
good, little darlin'
Oh, no
(upbeat music continues)
(singer vocalizing)
- Robert? Andy Singer.
Yeah. Andy Singer from, uh, Margolis?
Ah-huh, yeah, listen,
I found an apartment that I think you-
(customer grunts) (liquid splashes)
- [Customer] Damn, bro.
- Come on!
- Watch where you going.
- Ugh, lemme call you back.
(door thudding)
Shit!
(engines rumbling)
- [Bystander] Let's go!
(traffic light beeping)
- Hey! Hi.
Hi. Sorry!
(pants)
I'm here. I'm here.
- Andy, I thought we were
gonna meet at the office.
- [Andy] I thought it'd be easier if I
just came here. Get those keys from you.
- Right, well, I thought we
were supposed to leave 'em
with the landlord?
- Yeah. Yeah, that's okay,
I'll, I'll make sure he gets 'em.
- Okay, what about my security deposit?
- Sure. Sure, of course.
You have the inspection report, right?
- Inspection report?
- [Driver] We're parked in
front of a hydrant, we gotta go.
(tenant sighs)
- You know
what? Don't stress, I'll sign off on it
and I'll make sure they send you the check.
- Okay. Um.
Here is the mail key.
This one's the door to the
unit, and then the building.
Have fun.
- Okay. Hey, enjoy your new home.
(truck engine rumbling)
(truck door thuds)
(soft gentle dramatic music)
(gentle dramatic music)
(door thuds)
Hey! It's, uh.
It is keys.
(gentle suspenseful music)
(knuckles rapping)
- [Liz] Hi, Maria. Good morning.
I'm so sorry...
- I wasn't supposed to be on call today.
- No, no problem.
- So, thank you.
- No problem.
- Okay. Okay.
- Anna.
- I love you, baby.
Go inside.
- Anna.
- Grazia, Maria.
- [Maria] Enjoy work. Bye.
(gentle dramatic music)
- [Reporter] Another
blisteringly hot summer day
in New York City is doing
little to cool tensions
over the treatment of a
snow leopard at the city zoo.
- Maria.
(speaking Spanish)
(Maria speaking Spanish)
(baby screeching)
(Maria singing in Spanish)
(baby crying)
(Maria speaking Spanish)
(phone ringing)
(gentle dramatic music)
- [Maria] Hello.
(quirky gentle dramatic music)
(baby crying)
(suspenseful music) (door thuds)
(soft slow suspenseful music)
(door thuds)
(Andy whistles)
- Hello?
(microwave door clicks)
(microwave door thuds)
(dishwasher door thuds)
(dishwasher creaking)
(slow suspenseful music)
(Andy grunting)
(Andy sighs) (traffic droning)
(soft slow suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music)
Jackpot.
- Travis, is that everything?
- [Travis] Empty, boss.
- [Jed] Hold this.
- Hey! Hey!
Wait, this is it? It's not
even half of what you said.
- Andy, the deal is you
give me appliances of value.
What am I going to do with a microwave?
- W-what about the dishwasher?
- It's shit. It's summer.
I need air conditioning units.
We had a deal. Gimme my coffee.
- Come on! No one has ACs.
- Figure it out, Andy. You're a smart guy.
- Not that smart.
- [Jed] This guy's very unreliable.
Last month it was stoves, now this.
I'll be back. You better
have something for me today.
(van engine rumbling)
One thing after another with this guy.
The deal is though
(speaking faintly), how serious.
Heinrich, you said you had a cousin.
(birds chirping)
(dramatic music)
(lid clatters)
(wind whooshing)
(dramatic music)
(traffic droning)
(Andy grunts)
(quirky dramatic music)
It's '91, a war is on
I watch in black, white and green
My mother dances around
Like there ain't no rip in the seam
While she waltzes with ghosts
I can feel what went wrong
And she's here, but she's not
Just like her, I'm not home
(quirky dramatic music continues)
Just like her, I'm not home
Just like her, I'm not home
I'm here, but I'm not
Just like her, I'm not home
And I'm here, but I'm not
Just like you, I can't leave
I'm here, but I'm not
Just like you, I can't leave
I'm here, but I'm not
Just like you, I can't leave
(singers vocalizing) (door rattling)
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy sighs)
(drill whirring)
- [Peter] Don't stop. Take it down.
(door thudding)
Come on, keep going.
(drill whirring) (door thudding)
- What are you? Hey,
Peter, what's going on?
- [Officer] Hey!
- I have the key. You don't
have to break the door.
- Andrew Singer?
- Andy's fine.
- Notice to quit. Summons for eviction.
- Eviction? Peter, w-what is this?
You called the police?
- He's my brother-in-law.
- Wait, is this real? Are you real?
- You wanna find out?
- Peter. Peter, this is very loud.
Come on, you're not serious!
- I'm very serious.
- Peter.
Peter. Peter.
- You lock me, I break lock.
- I didn't lock you!
- This is not my lock. This is your lock!
- It's called privacy, Peter.
- Privacy, no, no, no!
- Yes, yes!
I'm allowed to change the locks on my door!
- I wait four months for rent.
- Ah-huh.
- First time I wait,
you not come back!
- Where you going?
- Second time you said,
"Oh, I'll have the money."
But no money in my hands!
- Does he need to keep doing that?
- [Peter] You make me
look like I am bad guy.
You are bad guy.
- I am not bad guy.
- Every day the same.
I work in the building,
all the tenants pay-
- Can I just say something?
- Only you not pay!
- May I speak? May I
speak? (Peter rambling)
Can I please? Peter?
Peter! Peter!
Peter!
- Please.
- Okay, look. Look.
Let's just look at things
with a bit of distance.
Okay? I rented this
building for you, right?
Every unit! I brought all these tenants in.
We had a deal!
I fill the apartment...
- You break deal.
- I rented this whole
piece of shit building,
I shouldn't have to pay!
(phone buzzing)
- Locksmith, you keep going!
- No, you know, that's. Fuck!
(train rattling)
You know, nothing works in this shithole.
You wanna see what it's like living here?
I can't even take a working shower.
Here, look at this.
(tap creaks) (water sloshing)
That usually doesn't happen.
(dramatic music)
(traffic droning) (sirens wailing)
- And you know how many
warning I give you, huh?
- [Andy] Warnings?
- I give you so many, so
many chances, that you ignore.
- I didn't think you were
serious. I thought we're friends.
- [Peter] Look how disgusting
you live in this place.
- Hey, hey! I got food in there.
(Peter speaking in foreign language)
- Yeah, I-I've no idea what you're saying.
I gotta take this.
Stop! (drill stops whirring)
(dramatic music)
This is Andy.
- When you buy this?
- Ah-huh.
- You have money for it.
- Yeah. Yeah, everything's all set.
You're gonna love it. Great, see you there.
Okay. Bye.
Don't even think about it.
Wait, you want me to melt?
(dramatic music) (Andy grunts)
- Oh, and you pay for door too, huh?
- You broke the door!
- I give chance again and
again, but you take advantage.
I am a good guy. (doorbell chiming)
- Now what? (dramatic music)
Shit!
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy sighs and mutters)
(doorbell chiming)
Hey, Peter! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
(door lock buzzing) (dramatic music)
(Andy yelling)
- [Peter] You're crazy.
(Andy continues yelling)
- [Andy] Peter!
- Dad!
- Anna!
- Hi.
(gentle quirky suspenseful music)
- Peter? You remember my daughter Anna?
- Eh, hello.
You grow very tall.
- Yes. That's what happens.
- [Anna] Hey, that's me.
- Yeah. Ah-huh, look how cute you were.
But Peter doesn't care how cute you are,
he wants you out on the streets.
- You're not going to guilt me.
- Why don't you, uh, go
wait in here for a few seconds
while the grownups talk, okay?
(door thuds)
Nice, Peter, very nice. She's 10!
Maybe she'll get lucky
and find a piss-free patch
of sidewalk to sleep on.
- [Peter] Oh, come on.
She lives with her mother.
She doesn't even come here anymore.
- [Andy] That's 'cause this is
a hostile living environment.
- [Peter] You're crazy.
- [Andy] You're constantly
changing the locks.
The stove is never working.
I don't know if the gas
is gonna leak and kill me
in the middle of the night.
- Blah, blah, blah.
This is about you owing me money.
- No, this is about right and wrong.
- Okay! I am right, you're wrong.
- Okay, look, I just need more time. Okay?
I'm about to close a deal.
That was them on the phone.
- Dad? What about my birthday?
You said we'd have the party here.
- Yes, yes, it's her birthday, Peter.
- And I already invited
Selena, Amelia, and Michelle.
- Michelle's coming?
Michelle's coming, Peter!
- Andy, please, get me money today.
I have no more time.
- Yes. Yeah, it'll happen.
- Oh, come on, let's go.
(door thuds)
- There's no way he bought that.
(sighs)
What are you doing here?
- [Anna] I tried to call.
- Well, I've been a little busy.
- [Anna] You getting kicked out?
- No, I'm not getting kicked out.
And it's not polite to eavesdrop
on other people's conversations.
- How much do you owe?
- Hm, depends on who's asking.
- [Anna] I mean, I have some money.
- Oh geez.
- [Anna] What happened to your shirt?
- You know, I'm very happy to see you,
but it's really not a good time.
- I'm already here!
- Well, I have showings all day!
- [Anna] I thought we
could spend the day together.
You could take me to lunch.
Or maybe we could go to the zoo?
- [Andy] The zoo? Anna, I've gotta work.
- [Anna] I saw your headshots.
You still going on auditions?
- Yes. I'm still doing that, when I can.
- [Anna] Mom said you gave up.
- Yeah well, your mother's
quicker to give up than I am.
- [Anna] How old is this?
(camera clicks and whirs)
- [Andy] We gotta get
you back to your mother's.
- [Anna] I just got here.
- I have to work!
- Well, I'm not leaving.
- Oh, yes you are.
(quirky dramatic music)
- [Anna] Is this really necessary?
- I'm not taking you to the zoo.
- This is just gonna make her mad.
- What else is new?
- She's on call.
- Well, that's not my problem.
- You're not gonna make
it back for your showing.
- Wanna bet?
- Can you please just put me down?
- How do I know you're not gonna run away?
- Because we're moving.
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy sighs)
- What?
- [Anna] We're moving.
- Moving? Moving where?
- Florida.
- Florida?
- [Anna] Orlando, actually.
(Andy sighs)
- This was not part of the agreement.
She can't just move without telling me.
Orlando? You kidding me?
Wait till I tell my lawyer.
- When d'you get a lawyer?
- Come on, Anna, let's go.
- She's just gonna tell you
to take me back to Maria's.
(quirky suspenseful music)
- Who's Maria?
- Wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
No! Dad!
(Andy exclaiming)
- Who's that?
- That's him.
- He's bald.
- [Anna] I know.
- Your mother's impressed too easily.
I told her that when we got together.
They getting married?
- I don't know.
- You didn't ask.
- What, you want me to?
(phone buzzing)
- Stay here.
This is Andy.
Yes. Hi, uh.
No, I-I-I got delayed a little bit.
No, no, no, no, no.
Don't, don't go anywhere.
I'm like a few blocks away. Okay?
Yep. Bye.
(staff chattering)
Anna! Here, hold this.
- [Anna] What?
(gentle music) (phone ringing)
- Not here.
- Lead the way.
- [Liz] Don't move.
- [Announcer] Paging
Dr. Simon. Dr. Simon, please.
(door thuds)
- I do not...
- Lower your voice.
You know, your daughter
showed up at my doorstep-
- Our daughter. this morning.
- Our daughter, you dick.
- I'm sorry, our daughter
showed up on my doorstep this morning.
You know what she told me?
That you're moving to Orlando?
- Why don't you lower your
voice? People are working.
- You can't move without telling me.
And you can't raise a kid in Orlando.
- Yeah, actually I could
do whatever I want.
That's what sole custody means, moron.
- Well, seeing as how you have
sole custody, why don't you take our
daughter, and have a great day?
- No. No.
You need to take her
home, 'cause I'm on call.
- Oh, I have to work too!
- Yeah, putting gel in your hair
and lying to people doesn't count as work.
- I use mousse.
- Take her to Maria. You owe me this.
- I know what I owe you.
- [Liz] You think this is about money?
- [Andy] You took her
away because of money, so.
- I didn't take her away from you.
The court took her away from you
because they agreed with me.
Don't answer that!
- I, this is work, okay?
I really don't have time for this today.
Unless you wanna pay my rent this month,
I need to work.
- I'm able to work full-time
and take care of her seven days a week.
Why don't you be a
responsible father for one day?
- I am extremely responsible.
I brought her here!
- Yeah. Take her to Maria.
- Who the fuck is Maria?
(dramatic music)
Oh, she thinks she can
move without telling me.
(sirens wailing)
Hey, come on. Come on, come on.
- Can you just slow down?
- Can you speed up?
I've got clients waiting.
- Your legs are longer than mine.
- [Andy] God, it's hot.
(bright dramatic music)
- Come on, you're stepping on my toes.
- I'm sorry.
- Dad!
- What?
- This isn't even my train.
- Yeah, I'm not taking you
home. I don't have time.
- So I can stay with you?
- Yes, you can stay with me.
But if you get in the way-
- I'll be good, okay? I'll help you.
- Okay, great. Well, help
me by making this train.
Come on. Come on, come on!
- [Anna] Wait up!
(bright dramatic music)
- Come on, come on.
- [Announcer] Stand clear
of the closing doors, please.
- [Andy] All right, let's
find a clean seat, uh.
- [Anna] Where are we
gonna sit? It's packed.
(bright upbeat music)
What about over there?
- [Andy] No, don't sit there. It's dirty.
- That one?
- Okay, this one, this one. Come on.
(train whooshing) (bright upbeat music)
- So, what's my job?
- Your job is to let me do
my job and stay outta the way.
- Can I help with that?
- No, Anna, I have to be focused, okay?
It's a big day. I need to be sharp.
Where is it?
Oh, here it is. Okay.
All right, it's a one-bedroom, pre-war,
built 1921, 2,850 gross, 2,300 net.
Wow, that's a lot for a one-bedroom.
It's a beautiful one-bedroom, folks.
It's a beautiful one-bedroom, folks.
As you can see, tons of exposed brick.
Lots of sunlight.
You're really getting a great deal here.
You're really gettin' a great deal here.
Uh, the building was built in 19-
- 21.
- Thank you. 1921.
And uh, it's, uh...
What is that?
- I got it this morning.
- Fight for animal rights.
Cool. The building was built in 1921.
As you can see from the
very detailed crown molding...
Is your bag on the floor of the subway?
Anna, hasn't anyone ever taught you
that every single surface in
New York, especially the subway,
has been touched by people
with shit on their hands?
Hey, come on. Gross.
Okay, now I'm covered in rat piss.
(Anna laughs)
What are you doing? 1921, all right.
Watch your step.
(door creaks)
(door thuds)
- $2,800. I saw one
yesterday for $600 less.
And it was bigger.
- Yeah, well...
- It's a pre-war.
Lots of charm.
- [Customer] How old is this place?
- It's, uh...
- It was built in 1921.
Hm, lots of history.
- History? What, like bedbugs?
- What? No, no, no, no.
You'll get a full report.
The landlord or management has to
notify you... This place is a mess, man.
- Yeah, they, they're gonna
clean it before you move in.
- I don't know, seems
a little bit too small.
- Small? I mean.
- There's a toilet in the living room.
(sirens wailing)
- Yeah, they're gonna
move that into the bathroom,
which has a shower, by the way.
- Is that supposed to be a luxury?
(gentle upbeat music)
- If you're gonna chime in,
you need to know what to say.
- I was right. That's when it was built.
- Well, there's such a thing
as too much information.
(car horns honking)
And you got a movie theater
right around the corner.
Uh, there's tons of great restaurants.
- [Customer] This is really tight, man.
You sure this is legal?
- Yeah.
- [Anna] Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Seems like it's a fire hazard.
- I-I don't understand. There's no stove.
- Uh, no, no, but-
- How can there be no stove?
- Well, it's, it's pretty standard.
I mean, I didn't have a
stove in my first apartment.
Uh, do you have a hot plate?
- And what makes you
think it's my first apartment?
- [Customer] Is there not a doorman?
- [Andy] No, this is a pre-war.
And if you want, I can show
you some condo apartments.
- [Customer] My friend lives in a pre-war.
She has a doorman.
- Hi, sorry. Uh, uh.
Sorry, back up, back up, back up.
(door thuds)
Okay.
- What do you want me to do?
- No worries.
Yeah. Nope, it's okay.
- Okay.
- Okay.
All right.
- Ow.
- Oops.
- Sorry.
- It's a great location.
And, and for the price.
- And why is there no air conditioner?
- No, they never come
with air conditioning.
- It's summer!
- You could open a window.
(gentle upbeat music)
(panting)
- [Andy] Fuck it.
Do you even wanna see the inside?
- What about a floor plan?
(slow dramatic music)
- The floor is made of wood.
(Andy sighs)
- Come on, hurry up!
- Where are we going?
(gentle dramatic music)
Okay, these are my last leads.
Just stay here. Don't move.
- I'm helping you.
- Help? We haven't closed one listing.
- [Anna] So you want me to sit here
alone on the street with strangers?
- Yes, don't move. Let me handle this.
- [Anna] It's hot.
- Don't move.
(gentle dramatic music)
Excuse me, hi. Sorry.
It's been a hell of a day.
- Andy, right?
- Andy, hi. Yes, uh, Andy, yes.
Yes, all right. Ah, lock box.
Okay, here we go.
(gentle dramatic music)
(sirens wailing)
(protesters yelling)
(gentle dramatic music continues)
- Um, excuse me. What's
up with this zoo protest?
- Oh, we're actually gonna
go march through the park,
protesting animal cruelty.
- For who?
- For Summit, the snow leopard.
You know, you should come.
(gentle dramatic music)
(lock clatters)
- Have we met before?
- Uh, I don't think so.
- You were in that commercial.
With, um, toothpaste.
- That was me.
- I knew it.
(vocalizes)
You look a lot older.
(lock clatters) (Andy sighs)
- You know what? I have a key.
I have a key.
It's a really, really great unit.
Um, somebody does have an application in,
but if we act fast...
- Wait, someone has an application in?
- Uh, well, uh, yes, but you know,
there's this approval process.
- [Customer] So someone's already signed?
- Uh, yes, well.
- So why did you have us come here?
- Look, it doesn't mean
they're gonna get the unit.
Okay? It, it just means that-
(protesters yelling)
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy chattering)
Why don't we, why don't we just go inside?
(bicycle thuds) (keys clattering)
Shit!
(suspenseful music)
Uh. Hold on one second.
Gimme a minute, okay?
All right, it's, it's, it's, just,
just, just bear with me.
- [Jackson] Andy!
- Jackson.
- Ooh, this traffic was a nightmare.
I didn't know if we were
gonna make it over here.
You, uh, you need a hand?
- No, no, I'm okay.
No, no, no, no, no, no. I got it.
I got it, okay? It's fine.
- Here for the one-bed?
- Yeah. Yeah, we're here for the one-bed.
Just gimme a second.
- I can take 'em up.
Uh, we're seeing the unit next door.
- Look, the key is here, okay?
It's just, I-I just need a minute.
- Dad.
- Hey.
It's okay. It's okay.
Anna, Anna! It's okay.
Just stop!
- Uh, yeah, we're gonna go with, um-
- Jackson.
- Hi.
- [Customer] Hello, Jackson. How are you?
- Lovely. Andy, don't worry.
Take your time.
Take your time, Andy.
Take your time.
(door creaks and thuds)
(car horns honking)
(TV crowd chattering)
(traffic whooshing)
(coins clattering)
(cash register whirring)
(bystander speaking in foreign language)
(traffic rumbling)
- Here.
- I'm not hungry.
- I told you not to move.
- I didn't go anywhere.
- Well, I couldn't see you.
- They came up to me.
I went right back to the bench.
I didn't do anything wrong.
(sighs)
- You don't have a cellphone, do you?
I think I broke this.
- I'm 10. And why didn't you let me help?
I could've done way more
than just bake on that corner.
- You're 10!
- So?
- Oh, Anna, this is hard work. Okay?
If you're lucky, if you're lucky,
you get a few showings a week,
maybe one of 'em puts money in your pocket.
But it takes time, which I do not have.
- Well, we can't just give up.
We can find new apartments or new people.
- Oh, people? People?
You know, do you have a friend
who needs a new apartment,
or better yet, do you have,
uh, $7,000 in that backpack?
Because I'm four months behind on my rent,
and unless I can close
an apartment by today,
I'm gonna lose mine.
- Maria says she's
looking for a bigger place.
- Oh, Maria said that? Oh,
okay, oh wait, Maria said that.
Okay. Ah, God!
(traffic whooshing)
(Anna sighs)
Dad?
- You can't leave me here.
- Who's that?
- It's me!
- Andy?
- Yes, Dad.
- I'm not staying here.
- [Harold] Anna, is that you?
- Hi, Grandpa.
- [Harold] I heard you're moving.
- [Anna] Yeah, the
movers came this morning.
We leave tomorrow.
- Wait, you knew she was moving?
- [Harold] There was an enormous protest
out front here before.
- [Anna] Yeah, we saw 'em too.
- Unbelievable.
- People complain about
everything all the time.
Look at these beautiful vegetables.
How can anyone throw them
out? You can make a stew.
- You're making soup? It's boiling in here.
- Well, the AC is out.
(sighs)
- Dad! How old is this?
- Ah, don't throw it out.
It's good for thickening.
(clears throat)
- You know, Anna really wanted
to see you before she moved.
- Umm-hmm.
- Yeah.
I thought she could hang here today.
- Anna!
- I'm helping you.
- [Harold] Can you get
me that brush in the sink?
- Well, this would be more helpful.
- You suck.
- Anna?
(Harold groans)
- There's two!
- Uh, the filbert,
the thick one, the
hairs look like hazelnuts.
- I thought you were
gonna clean this place?
- [Harold] It's clean.
- Look at this. Why are
Mom's clothes still here?
- Thank you. Come here.
You see...
- Dad!
- This is for detail.
Those little lines, they
get smaller and smaller,
and so it makes things look further away.
- It's an illusion?
- Exactly.
- Shit.
- What are you looking for?
- There was a box here.
- [Harold] Oh, that's all gone.
- What?
- I used it all.
(soft slow upbeat music)
(record needle scratches)
- That was Mom's money.
- Well, she's dead. What
she's gonna do with it now?
- Dad?
- I needed it for my
mortgage. My pension kicked.
- Wait, wait, wait. What?
- I needed it for my mortgage.
My pension kicked.
- I heard you.
What, what, what do you
mean your pension kicked?
- It's all in the letters over there.
(Harold clears throat)
- Why didn't you tell me?
Dad! We need to talk about these.
(toilet rumbling)
- Hey!
- Who's that?
- My roommate, Marvin.
- Roommate?
- Yeah. I put a bed in, in Mom's office.
I used Craigslist. I didn't
have to pay a broker.
- I'm a broker.
- Yeah, there's a lot
of con artists out there.
- You know, I knew a broker.
He's in jail now.
Huh!
(clock ticking)
- All right, what's wrong?
- Nothing's wrong.
- You never come by
unless you're in trouble.
Are you in trouble?
- [Andy] I'm fine. I just
need you to watch her.
- [Harold] I have plans.
- What plans? With, uh, uh, Marvin?
- Andy, I'm here for you,
but I cannot take her today.
- Look, I need to find new clients,
get apartments for those clients, it's like
"Ring Around the Rosie."
- She's a big kid.
Put her to work.
It is not my job to watch your daughter.
What's that saying about fruit?
- "The man is not a piece of fruit."
- I don't know how that applies.
- It applies.
Look Andy, you're a good
father when you don't try to be.
I need to paint.
(Andy sighs)
(elevator rattles) (quirky dramatic music)
(elevator squeaking)
- You got paint on your bag.
(elevator bell dings)
Come on. We can do this.
Just gotta regroup, you know? Focus.
- This is where you work?
- Here.
(quirky dramatic music)
Don't talk to anybody.
- I'm hungry.
- We'll eat after I'm done here.
- The neighborhood is
great. (speaks faintly)
(items clattering)
- What's this?
- Those are uptown houses.
I don't show them very often.
- Home.
It is a pet-friendly. (speaking faintly)
(quirky dramatic music)
(colleague speaking faintly)
- [Colleague] Where's he
coming from? He's so sweaty.
- Hear you.
I can hear you!
- I guess he can hear us.
- Is there something you wanna say to me?
(quirky dramatic music)
(elevator bell dings)
Michael?
- I'm on lunch.
- Stay here. Michael, wait.
Michael, wait!
(quirky dramatic music)
(phone ringing)
(car horns honking)
You can't ignore me!
Come on, Michael. Don't run away.
- We do this after lunch.
- I need a favor.
I need an advance.
(Michael scoffs) (traffic droning)
- You serious?
- They're trying to kick
me out of my apartment.
- You haven't closed a
single property in two months.
You know how much of a shit show
that makes for me in this office?
- You're giving me shit listings!
- Everybody gets shit listings.
I should fire you.
- You can't. I work on commission.
- What commission?
- Do you know how hard it is
to convince people to rent
one of these sweat boxes?
Our units are shit.
Half of 'em don't even have appliances.
- That reminds me.
Did you ever figure out what happened to
those appliances at that two-bed on 82nd?
- Oh my God. We've been through this.
I came back here and dropped off the keys.
Whatever happened after
that has nothing to do with me!
- Ah-huh, ah-huh.
- Look, look, look, I just
need one good listing.
Like the ones you give Jackson.
- Hey, I didn't give anyone anything.
It gets listed on the
board like everything else.
I got a lot of mouths to feed.
- Well, I'm starving, Michael!
And now my daughter,
she's gonna starve too.
Come on. I know you give
the good shit to Jackson.
- He has clients!
- He stole my clients!
- Oh, you know this world, Andy!
You need new clients,
you go get new clients.
Get your hands dirty.
None of these guys play by the rules.
Jesus. Can I get some relish?
(motorbike engine rumbling)
Look, you'll be fine.
(car horns honking)
Maybe someone will
appreciate that cute face.
(bystander whistling)
(car horns honking)
(slow upbeat music)
(elevator bell dings)
(phone ringing) (slow upbeat music)
- Hey, you said you wanted to help, right?
- Yeah.
- We're a team, right?
- We're a team.
- Right, okay.
You're my lookout.
If anybody starts to come
back there, you gimme a signal.
- Wait, what?
- We're a team.
- Wait, what's the signal?
(quirky suspenseful music)
(quirky dramatic music)
(elevator bell dings) (Jackson chattering)
(quirky dramatic music continues)
Dad!
Dad!
- My lady.
Watch me working the board.
Claudia, new clients. New clients, Claudia.
(Jackson chuckles)
- [Nick] Hey.
- Hi.
- You're Singer's kid, right?
Is he around?
- He just stepped out.
- [Nick] Is he working on something?
- This piece of shit.
- Good stuff?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
- Is it,
one, two, three, four?
That's it. You gotta be kidding me.
(Nick speaking faintly)
(quirky dramatic music)
- Watch.
- Mm-hmm, yes.
- [Nick] Check this out.
It's a big responsibility.
(quirky suspenseful
music) (mouse key clicking)
(keyboard keys clacking)
Come on!
Here we go.
Okay!
(quirky suspenseful music)
- [Nick] Yep, Margolis
gave it to me himself.
He only gives it to the best of the best.
- I'll just take it myself.
- It's pretty cool.
It's got a little Chronometer.
- You okay?
I'm just gonna get you some water.
(quirky dramatic music)
- Andy!
- You seem dangerous.
(quirky dramatic music)
(bag thuds)
- [Nick] Oh, oopsie daisy.
- [Jackson] Oh, let help you out.
- [Nick] Not a big deal.
Ah, yes. Get down here and.
- [Jackson] Hey, gimme a second here.
Get down there.
Hey, it's Anna, right?
We meet again.
This is what it is.
- Anna!
- Has this, right?
- [Nick] Andy.
- Andy, I'll let you clean this up.
Now come on.
Hey, don't worry about her.
You're gonna love this apartment.
(papers rustling)
(bag thuds)
- Tough morning?
- Back off, Nick.
- Those are your clients, right?
I mean, that can't be
very good for business.
- You ready?
Come on, come on, come on. Let's go!
Nick, you mind?
- Uh, Andy? You know you got
something on your shirt, right?
- [Andy] Piece of shit.
(elevator rattles) (elevator squeaking)
- So did you get it?
(keys jangling)
(elevator squeaking)
(phone keys beeping)
- Hey, I got a, I got a
two-bed on 68th Street.
Ah-huh. Okay, well I got
a-another spot on 74th.
And then there's one on 96th,
if that's not too far up there for ya.
Yeah! Yeah, let me just jot that down.
Anna! Pen, pen!
Yeah, sorry, I'm calling
from my office line.
Uh, we got the windows open.
Okay, great. Perfect.
Okay, see you then. Hey!
Hey, what are you doing?
(dramatic music)
- Dad!
- Let me go!
- Hurry up! Travis, don't
leave the child on the sidewalk.
Let's go. Watch her head.
- [Travis] Okay. There you go.
(suspenseful music)
(tires screeching) (van engine rumbling)
- This is not what we do,
Jed. This is not what we do!
- Oh, no, no, no, Andy, you broke our deal.
I asked you for functioning
air conditioning units.
You give me broken dishwashers.
This is a simple transaction.
Working appliances for money. Okay?
When you give me broken
appliances, I break something
of yours like your
pinky or your ring finger.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- Yeah, tell, tell him, tell
him how you feel, Jaime.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- What is he saying?
- When d'you start selling lemons?
- Lemons?
- They're all lemons.
- These are the top of the line!
- And he's asking what's wrong with you.
- Everything you give me...
- And that's all your fault.
- This isn't my fault.
- And he paid you this morning,
even though he shouldn't have.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- [Jed] See, this is how you upset him.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- [Jed] How do you raise a child like this?
- I don't think I'm
allowed to say that word.
- Shouldn't you be in school?
This is very bad parenting.
- This is ridiculous.
I don't have time for this.
I'm with my kid. I'm on the clock.
What are you doing?
- D'you think these guys like
carrying broken dishwashers
up five flights of stairs
in 100 degrees heat?
They do not, Andy. They do not.
- Well, they weren't broken when I got 'em.
- I apologize for not believing you,
but you've lost a bit of credibility
as far as I'm concerned.
- Jed, these aren't broken.
(Jed speaking Spanish)
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
(dog growls)
- Okay. Okay, okay!
Okay, okay. Jed, Jed, listen.
I got two spots right now.
One across the river.
- You got a place?
- Another uptown.
- Okay.
- You go up there, I sign
you in with the doorman.
I'm sure they got something real nice.
- [Jed] You better not
be messing with me, Andy.
You better not be messing with me.
You are shaping up to be
one hell of a disappointment
in my life.
(gentle suspenseful
music) (traffic whooshing)
(car horns honking)
(upbeat music)
- [Doorman] I'll call you back.
- Hi, there. Uh, we are
here to see apartment 4D.
I'm from Margolis.
- You're?
- I'm the rental agent.
I, uh, I have a key.
(keys jangle)
- [Doorman] And her.
- That's my daughter.
- Sign in here, please.
- [Andy] Thanks.
(upbeat music)
- Hey, hey. I would like to see this one.
- That's not my listing.
- I can tell. It has very
high-end appliances.
- Yeah, it's the penthouse.
- Andy, I am done with
your shithole listings.
Do you understand?
Jed...
- That one's open, if
you wanna take 'em up.
- Thanks, boss.
(upbeat music)
- Thanks a lot.
(quirky suspenseful music)
Come on.
- Make sure you wipe your boots.
(hand thuds)
- So we're just breaking and entering now?
- Not breaking. Just entering.
- Andy. Andy!
Why did you take me to an open house?
- You're the one who wanted
to come up here. I didn't know.
- Explain to me how it's always my job
to figure out how to solve your problems
that you create for...
- Hi!
Are you guys here for the open house?
- Open house? Yes.
- Yes. Here, take a brochure.
And you're here for the washer?
- Uh, yep.
- Great, amazing.
We called management this morning.
We didn't know that maintenance
could come today. Come on.
(soft gentle music)
(guests softly chattering)
Okay. You can install this?
- Oh yeah.
- Great.
- Anna, just smile, and
smile, hi, how are you?
You have to blend in.
- [Anna] What about them?
- [Andy] Yeah, I'm still figuring that out.
- Wow.
- It's nice, right?
No trains waking you up in
the middle of the night here.
- [Travis] Wow. Rad, boss.
- Get up. Go find me something.
- [Anna] I like listening
to the trains at night.
- Oh shit, that's a broker.
See how everybody's talking to him?
That's what happens when
you have a place like this.
Names, phone numbers,
email. You get it all.
- All right, all I need is
name, phone number, email.
That's it. Here you go.
Great place, right?
(sighs)
Beautiful.
- Well, I need to get...
- Those windows, huh?
- No, Anna!
- Hey.
- Hey.
- You look very familiar.
- I, I don't know.
- You're an actor?
- Yeah.
- I've seen you in something.
- Uh, yeah, well, I just, uh,
I did a toothpaste ad.
- Makes sense. Very cute smile.
- Oh, well you! Please.
That's why I got cast.
- Who are you here with?
- Uh, that's my daughter.
- Oh, that's cute.
- Yeah.
You here with your dad?
- No, that's my husband.
- Oh!
- But it's fine.
- Ah-huh. You guys looking to buy?
- Yeah, actually.
- Yeah? Well, I gotta be honest with you.
This place, it's not a very good deal.
- [Jed] Hey, Jaime! I might
need your muscle on this one.
- It's not a co-op building either.
And, uh, and...
- Wait, tell me a little
bit more about those.
- Why are you doing this?
- Because your dad can't
seem to keep his promises.
(soft gentle music)
(guests softly chattering)
- So is this worth a lot?
- Yeah. I'm sorry, can I
help you with something?
- [Travis] Jed, it's a Ninja BL660.
- Wow! Let's make a pile.
- Look, I know you think you're real tough,
but I'm not scared of you.
- That's because I am a nice guy.
- So this is what you wanted
to do when you grew up?
- Hey, Jaime, do you think
we could fit a small child
in this washer machine?
- Hmm, Si.
- How tall are you?
- Four foot, five.
- A four foot, five child
in this washer machine?
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
(speaking Spanish)
- That means yes.
- I have another apartment
that's, uh, downstairs.
Actually, it's not as big
obviously, but it's better priced.
Why don't you take my card?
- So this, this isn't your showing?
- Uh.
- No, it's mine.
And if I didn't know any better, I'd say
you're trying to steal some of my clients.
- No, I think, uh, I think
there's been some confusion.
Um.
- What's, uh,
I'm sorry, I didn't get your name.
- Yeah, it's, it's Andy.
And, uh, I was just explaining here
that, that I'm a realtor too.
- Oh, okay, and what, uh, chop shop,
shithouse brokerage do you work for?
- I-I-I work for Margolis downtown. Yeah!
- Wait, hold on. You one
of, you one of Mike's boys?
Is he here right now? Is he here?
What, is this like a joke or something?
Is he? Where is he?
- What?
- Where's Mike?
- Why are you staring at me
like an exotic bird?
- Can you hold this?
- [Jed] Uh, no. I'm not a side table.
Hey, where, where is she-
- Hey, Dad!
These guys are stealing, and they asked me
if I wanted to see the inside of their van.
- What happened?
(dramatic music)
What? Are you okay?
Hi. Um, what are you doing in here?
- I was just gonna swap it out.
It's a swap out.
- Oh, what? All right,
everybody, everything's okay.
Uh, right, have some
cheeses? New York, right?
(dramatic music) (car horns honking)
- That was, uh, pretty smooth.
- Yeah, but I didn't finish eating.
- Well, there's some time before
we have to meet these girls.
What are you in the mood for?
- [Anna] Hmm.
(children yelling) (water splashing)
(tap creaks) (Andy panting)
(Andy sighing)
- Shit.
(tap creaks) (water sloshing)
(knuckles rapping)
(hand banging)
(patrons chattering) (dishes clattering)
What do you think?
(camera whirring)
- I already ordered.
- I was talking about the stain.
(camera thuds) (soft music)
(keys jangling)
You know, this may
come as a surprise to you,
but sometimes I'm not
as confident as I seem.
I can't do my job looking
and smelling like a part-time barista.
- So when d'you start stealing appliances?
- Look, if you couldn't tell,
I'm in a bit of a financial situation.
I need a few extra bucks here and there.
So sometimes I...
- Steal?
- It's apartments people have left. Okay?
So we take an appliance or two.
Nobody notices. Doesn't hurt the tenants.
Barely hurts the landlords.
Or management, you
know, 'cause they're insured.
Worst case scenario, they don't get
their full security deposit back.
Which believe me, they don't need.
Thanks.
(keys clatter)
(sighs)
You know that was alive at some point.
- It's a veggie burger.
(scoffs)
- Gross.
- Why can't you do another commercial?
- Huh?
- Why can't you do another commercial,
like the toothpaste one?
- I can't just do another commercial.
I mean, I wish I could.
I- I could pay a whole year of rent
with one of those commercials.
- [Anna] You only do it for the money?
- What's wrong with that?
- Mom says that's why you
never got put into any real movies.
- [Andy] Oh yeah? What else did she say?
- You constantly make bad decisions.
- Mm-hmm.
- And you never listen to
her opinion on anything.
- Is that all?
- She thinks that you're
only in love with yourself.
She was upset about that for a long time.
- Well, she seems to
be doing just fine now.
(soft gentle music)
(vocalist singing faintly)
(Andy clicks tongue and sniffs)
- [Cheryl] And finally receive
some relief from this heat.
We'll have another check of
the weather in just 10 minutes.
But now more on the
protests surrounding the death
of a snow leopard at the city zoo.
- Anna, look, it's your protest.
- Braving the heat, to
call for an investigation
into the death of Summit,
after the snow leopard
collapsed late last night
as temperatures rose across the city.
New York 1's Erin Billups
joins us live with more. Erin?
- [Erin] Protestors began
lining up earlier this morning.
Organizers are warning there are-
- [Andy] What is it with these people?
Don't they have jobs?
- Aggressive animal rights activists,
posting die-ins across the city.
(soft gentle music)
(vocalist singing faintly)
- I'm full.
- You barely ate half.
- It's huge.
- Take another bite.
- I'm full.
- I'm not gonna let you
waste that whole thing.
- We don't have to go
back to your office, do we?
- No.
- [Anna] Are you really
friends with that guy Nick?
- What? Friends with Nick?
No. Nick is completely manipulative.
He looks for what you care about the most
and he tries, usually unsuccessfully,
to take that thing for himself
and use it against you.
Nick is like some kind of a, a-
- Cockroach.
- Cockroach! Exactly.
- No. Look!
(vocalist singing faintly)
Don't.
(hand bangs) (cockroach squelches)
Kill it!
(cockroach squelches)
(Anna gasps)
(soft gentle music)
(vocalist singing faintly)
(dishes clattering)
- When I say so, I want you to stand up
and scream as loud as you can.
Anna? I want you to get
up and make it big, okay?
It's gotta be huge.
- This is never gonna work.
- Come on, Anna, it's now or never.
(patron softly chattering)
(hands bang) (Anna screaming)
Oh my God! What's wrong?
- Cockroach!
- Oh, that's disgusting! Miss?
Miss! Can you come here please?
She's 10 years old! Look at her.
How does cockroach find
its way into a hamburger?
Can you tell me?
- [Chef] It's not my fault.
I'm sorry, I can't help you.
- At the very least,
at the very least, I should
get some sort of refund.
- Don't you feel bad?
- About what?
That burger cost them nothing.
- Not the food, for the cook.
- Oh, he'll be fine.
- He did nothing wrong.
- Neither did we. That place was infested.
This was an opportunity, not a crime.
- It's still wrong.
- Well, so was getting kidnapped,
but I didn't hear you
complaining about that.
- [Anna] He'll get fired.
- He's not gonna get fired. He'll be fine.
- Maybe I should go back to your office.
Let 'em know that
they're missing some keys.
I'm sure you'll be fine.
- Grow up, Anna.
- I'm not the one
who's acting like a child.
- There are other matters
a bit more pressing.
- Like your apartment?
- Yes, like my apartment.
Hey, I'm not forcing you to be here.
I still have to make sure
that I have a roof over my head
by the end of the night.
- I'm not trying to get in the way of that.
I've been trying to help
you all day. I just wanted-
- I know, I know, you
wanna see a snow leopard.
Well, guess what?
You can't just show up on my doorstep
and expect me to drop everything
just so I can take you to some stupid zoo.
- I haven't seen you in months
and you're 30 blocks away.
What are you gonna do
when I'm 3,000 miles away?
- You know what I'm gonna do?
I'm gonna thank my lucky stars
that I gave your mother sole custody.
(wind whooshing)
(car horns honking)
Anna!
Hey! Hey, Anna!
I was just kidding, okay? Geez.
Hello?
(bus rumbling)
(phone buzzing)
Hello? Hello?
Hello? Sorry, my phone...
Hello?
Shit.
(gentle melancholic music)
(Andy sighs)
(bell ringing)
Hey, hey! We're getting off.
- This isn't us.
- I wanna show you something.
If you still wanna go to
Mom's I'll take you after, okay?
Come on. Please?
(bus brakes hiss) (bus rattles)
(car horns honking)
(gentle melancholic music)
(chain clattering)
(dog barking)
It's okay.
Come on.
(gentle melancholic music continues)
Watch your step.
Can you believe they
just left it like this?
Try to imagine it.
Kitchen. Living room.
Your room was gonna be here.
Would've been amazing.
- This is the apartment?
Mom said it was a big crazy dream.
- It was. You see all these skyscrapers?
You know, the people who live there
aren't any different than you or me.
So you chase it, 'cause you
think you could get it too.
But you can't.
No matter how much
you think you deserve it.
Anyway, you shouldn't listen to me.
I'm a pretty shitty role model.
- I know, but Mom says
you could bitch about things
or you could do something.
- That doesn't mean you should run away.
That's not gonna stop this move.
- So would the couch go here?
- No, no, no, see, too many people
wanna put the couch against the wall.
You gotta break up the space.
I would've put the couch right there
so it still opens into the kitchen.
And then that would've been our room.
- You know she doesn't hate you.
- I don't hate her either.
(helicopter whirring)
- It's so hot.
- I know, I know, but you know,
we gotta keep pushing, right?
- Are you sure we going the right way?
- Yes. Yeah, definitely.
It's, I know it's in this area.
It's, Jed's guys took the
addresses I wrote down, so.
- 210 on 52nd. You said it in the van.
- I am so glad you showed up this morning.
- Dad!
- I mean it.
You know, y-Mom has you every day.
- Whatever. Shit!
- Hey, hey. Come on, language.
Oh shit.
(dramatic music)
Do you know what this is?
- Tetanus infection?
- This is the answer
to all of our problems.
(dramatic music)
Oh yeah! Look at this gem.
(door thuds)
This place will rent itself.
(Andy panting)
(Andy gasps)
Oh! Oh!
- Are we gonna plug it in?
- No, it'll fall out the
window if I don't do it right.
(Andy panting)
What? We're giving them a free AC.
They can install it themselves.
(footsteps thudding)
(traffic droning)
(door thuds)
- [Anna] It's a little dirty.
- Yeah? Let's do some cleaning.
(chuckles)
(Andy panting)
How about you start in the bathroom?
- So what should I say?
- You don't have to say anything,
you just have to wait for my signal.
- But I have to wait down here?
Are you sure this is even gonna work?
- Yes. Yeah.
Look, look, we just need to make
them feel like they're missing out.
You know, like it's a
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity,
but if they don't act fast,
somebody's gonna snatch
it from right under their nose.
- So I'm gonna sign the lease?
- What? No, no.
You're gonna stay here, wait for my signal,
I could see you from the window,
and I'll take it from there.
(car horn honks)
- I think they're here.
- Yeah. All right, that's them.
Showtime.
- After this, we'll go to the zoo?
- [Andy] After this, I'll take it
under serious consideration.
(traffic whooshing and rumbling)
(quirky suspenseful music)
(doors thudding)
- So as you can see,
it really gets amazing light.
Um, southeast exposure.
From the roof you can see
straight through the park.
I don't know how much
longer this place is gonna last.
(quirky suspenseful
music) (car horns honking)
(traffic droning)
- It's hot.
- Well, it won't be
once we get this little baby installed.
(sirens wailing) (foot thuds)
Oh, did I mention it
comes with the apartment?
Free-of-charge. Last tenant left it.
- Do you think it'll be too loud?
- Too loud? No, no, no.
These are, uh, these are
city windows. Very thick.
- Can we see the bathroom?
- Yeah! Yeah, it's just
right around the corner.
(quirky suspenseful music)
(car horns honking)
(traffic droning)
(suspenseful music)
(traffic whooshing)
- I can take pictures?
- Go for it.
- All right. It's a panorama thing.
- Okay.
Are you trying to?
- Do, do you mind?
Sorry. Okay, great.
Cool. Okay.
Hey, right this way.
(dramatic music) (customer scoffs)
(protesters yelling)
(phone buttons clacking)
- [Recording] Your call cannot
be completed at this time.
Please try again later.
(protesters yelling)
(recording speaking faintly)
(quirky dramatic music) (car horns honking)
- Excuse me, sir? Can I use your phone?
- There's a payphone outside.
- It's broken. I can't find my Mom or Dad.
They were supposed to be...
- What do I look like, kid?
(gentle suspenseful music)
- Please?
- You guys need a microwave?
It comes with the apartment.
Oh!
You know what, I need to take this.
Sorry. This is Andy.
Yes, it is. Yes!
Yes, the first month's free.
Ah-huh. No, no, no one's
submitted anything yet.
Crazy, I know.
No, it's definitely one of
the best apartments I've got.
I'm actually, uh, showing
it to some clients right now.
- Excuse me?
- Well, you know, there's some
interest, but I don't know how serious.
(customers whispering)
You'd wanna sign sight unseen?
- Excuse me!
- Just, I'm sorry, just one second.
- We wanna take it!
(gentle dramatic music)
- You know what, lemme just
finish here and I'll call you right back.
- You happy now?
Look at this. You sweat all over my phone.
- Well, you're covered in blood.
(protesters yelling)
- Hey! Hey, hey, hey, no, no, no.
Get outta here! Get outta here!
Get going! Keep it moving,
right now, right now!
(protesters yelling) (dramatic music)
(suspenseful music)
- Pay the difference?
- I mean, like $50.
- Are you crazy? That's not fair.
You have an extra 100 square feet.
- You could pay an extra thousand
dollars and still have space for a dresser.
You're the one who wanted to live uptown.
- Not for this much.
- Well, then let's-
- (stammers) Sorry, sorry.
Uh, uh, I'm just gonna
be in the other room.
I'll give you guys privacy to,
you know, mull it over. Okay?
(dramatic music) (protesters yelling)
(glass shattering) (suspenseful music)
(protesters yelling)
(protester yelling)
(shopkeeper yelling)
- You crazy!
(protesters yelling)
Psycho!
You okay, little girl?
- Space for a dresser.
It's not that much bigger.
- Yeah, it is.
It's like twice the size.
Is this apartment pet friendly?
- [Customer] I thought you
said we're gonna talk about that.
- Uh.
- What is there to talk about?
(protesters yelling)
- I got, I gotta go.
Sorry.
- You're leaving?
- No, no, no, no, no. I'm
just going downstairs.
I gotta, uh, uh, grab something.
I- I'll be right back.
- Are you serious?
- Yeah, no, ev-look, everything's
gonna work out, it's gonna be fine.
Okay, just, just don't go anywhere.
All right, don't leave. Don't leave.
(suspenseful music) (door thuds)
(protesters yelling) (dramatic music)
Anna! Anna!
Anna! Anna!
- Dad!
(dramatic music continues)
- [Andy] Anna!
- Dad!
- [Andy] Anna!
(intensifying dramatic music)
- [Anna] Dad!
- Anna!
(Anna thuds)
Oh shit.
- [Nurse] Can you lift your arm for me?
- Is my mom here?
- [Liz] Andy?
- [Andy] She's fine.
- Liz?
- Yeah?
He can listen.
- Anna's fine.
- Okay.
- Just a scratch, no breaks.
She needs a few stitches,
but we'll have her out in a few minutes.
- Thank you.
- Okay.
- Hey, baby girl. How you doing?
- Good.
- You look great to me.
Strong girl. Like your mama.
Hi, Steph. Well, you're
in good hands with Steph.
You want a juice?
- Sure.
- Yeah? Okay.
I'll right back, okay?
(Liz sighs)
- What?
Right, I messed up, okay?
I admit it, I messed up.
But you messed up too.
Yeah! She came to me.
She ran away from you and came to me.
You, you know what kinda kid
runs away from their parents?
Unhappy kids. I mean,
look at her, she's miserable.
- Lower your voice.
- Don't tell me to lower my voice.
She doesn't wanna go to Florida.
I don't want her to go to Florida.
This is a, a decision you're
making for you, and that's selfish.
- Oh, I'm selfish.
- Well, um,
how long have you known this guy?
- It's none of your business, Andy.
- None of my...
I'm her dad.
- Yeah? Since when?
Just because you have a
baby doesn't make you a dad.
- Yes, it does.
What?
(melancholic music)
(traffic whooshing)
(melancholic music continues)
(door clicks)
(door thuds)
Oh, you guys are still here?
- There he is! Andy, nice seeing you here.
- No! No, no, sorry, Jackson.
Sorry, you're, you're a little late.
Yeah, we were just about
to close the deal. Right, guys?
- It's funny, I thought I
had this as an exclusive.
Maybe I got something mixed up.
- Yeah, you got something mixed
up. He's always making, mixing-
- How d'you hear about this?
- He's always mixing stuff up.
- I don't know who's in charge,
but it's okay if I have a guarantor, right?
My dad's paying for us.
- You need a guarantor?
- Andy.
- This apartment doesn't accept guarantors?
- No, no, no, i-it does. It does.
I just, I just need you to fill out
one of these, uh, guarantor forms.
- Andy, how'd you get the key?
- I just have to talk to him
first. Make sure it's okay.
- You haven't talked to him yet?
- Andy?
- Come on, guys.
Guys, what are we doing here? Huh?
I mean, this place is a steal. Look at it!
Look, you said you wanted a
place by the first of the month.
Guess what? It's the first of the month.
- Andy, why don't you just admit
you stole the key from Mike's office?
- Do you have any idea how hard it is
to find a place like this?
I've been all over,
there, there, there's
nothing like this out there.
Why don't we just sign?
Huh? You know what, screw it.
Let's sign! Right?
Let's sign right now! Come on!
- Andy!
- Let's do it.
I'll waive the fee.
- You'll waive the fee?
- Half.
- Andy!
(door rattles)
- If your goal is to upset me, guess what?
I am officially upset.
Patrick!
- No.
- You renting this apartment?
- No, no, no.
- I'm Jed.
- No, no, no!
No, I-I-I was just about to close the deal.
I'm working here!
- As am I, Andy, as am I.
How you doing?
- Hey! Hey!
- Do you need a refrigerator unit?
- [Andy] No. No, no! What are you doing?
- I'm Jed from J&R...
- Sure you are.
- Appliances. Okay, that's disrespectful.
(dramatic music)
- That's mine! It's mine!
- [Jed] Break it up!
(Andy grunting)
(AC thuds)
- It's very unprofessional, Andy!
You've been very unprofessional.
(dog barking)
- [Travis] Bye, Andy.
- [Jed] I think I might be
done doing business with him.
(door thuds)
(Andy panting)
(Andy groans)
(Andy panting)
(Andy chuckling)
- Okay.
(energetic upbeat music)
(car horns honking)
Are you gonna ride for no one at all
Are you gonna cry on demand
Just to get your number called
Oh, baby, I know gone
I know gone, know out of this world
'Cause I've slept in my
bed alone next to my girl
So, do what you want,
just don't go dark on me
Hey
'Cause you run, run, run
Run with the wild
Then you cry on my
shoulder like a little child
Do what you want,
just don't go dark on me
- Hey! Nick, Nick!
(energetic upbeat music continues)
I left my keys at work.
Just don't go dark on me
Oh, just don't go dark on me
- Thank you! Run with the wild
(knuckles rapping)
- [Anna] Dad?
- Can I come in?
- [Anna] What are you doing here?
- I can't hear you.
- [Anna] What are?
(Andy panting)
- Hi.
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have left
you alone. Does it hurt?
- I'm fine. What happened to your showing?
- Uh. It didn't work out.
- What are you gonna do?
- [Liz] Anna!
- I'm packing!
- [Andy] Can I come in?
- She'll hear you.
(Andy sighs)
- I'm really sorry.
(somber music)
- You don't have to apologize.
(Andy sighs)
What?
- You know, if we run,
we could still make it.
It doesn't close till sundown.
(somber music)
Come on! Come on, come on.
We got this. We got this.
Come on!
(crowd softly chattering)
(birds chittering)
I see it. Come on.
What's he doing?
- Oh, wait, wait, we're here.
- Come on.
Wait, wait, don't close the gate.
Don't close the gate, please.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- We're here, come on,
you guys don't close for another hour.
- Yeah, we had to close early.
Some protestors tore down the back gate.
Now, I'm, I'm sorry. We
opens at 9:00 AM tomorrow.
- No, no, no.
- You can buy tickets it's online.
- Please, please, come on!
Come on, we just ran
all the way across town.
- Sorry, I gotta finish locking up.
- Hey, hey, come on!
Listen, I-I promised my
kid I'd take her to the zoo.
Come on. Come on, I promised.
- It's a mess inside. Come tomorrow.
- I can't come tomorrow.
I-I-I can't come tomorrow.
Please, please. Come on.
She's a kid.
- I'm sorry.
- She's a kid!
You're gonna say no to a kid? Please.
Hey, listen, listen.
You know, maybe you do
me a favor, I do you a favor?
Are you, are you looking
for a new apartment?
- An apartment?
- I got a great spot up on,
uh, uh, East 1 11th Street.
- Dad.
- [Stu] I'm sorry. You
guys gotta get outta here.
Come back another day.
- It's okay.
(somber music)
Let's go.
(birds chittering) (seal barking)
(crowd chattering)
(gentle melancholic music)
- [Andy] Look, look. That's heat lightning.
- [Anna] I know what heat lightning is.
- [Andy] You do?
- [Anna] It's pretty.
(gentle melancholic music)
- You don't like mustard?
- No.
- Me either.
- Gross.
(gentle melancholic music)
(insects chirping)
- I still wish I could have gotten us in.
- Well, you promised to
take me and not get me in.
- No, I know, I just, I don't know.
I wanted to give you-
- You did.
(gentle melancholic music)
- You think your mom's gonna let me visit?
- Of course. I'll make sure.
And you know I'm gonna visit you.
- Well, I'll make sure
she gets you a phone.
- I think you need
to get one for yourself first.
(gentle melancholic
music) (insects chirping)
(gentle solemn music)
(gentle solemn music continues)
(gentle solemn music continues)
(car engine rumbling)
(soft melancholic music)
- [Andy] He really did it.
(traffic whooshing)
(car engine rumbling)
(car door rattles)
(dog barking) (car door thuds)
- You told her where we were going?
- It's all right.
Hey, thanks for, uh,
letting me take her.
- Yeah, I didn't realize-
- No, it's okay.
I just didn't think he'd actually do it.
(scoffs)
- [Liz] How you feeling?
- Fine. Dad!
- Don't worry.
There's nothing here that's too valuable.
- Are you gonna be all right?
- Yeah, I don't need any of this.
Really. I'm good.
(somber music)
What, you're worried about me?
There's lots of places I can go.
(keys jangling)
- Dad.
- We got a big day tomorrow. Come on.
- It's okay.
- Come on. Call him from the road.
(somber music)
- Hey! Hey, hey, come on!
Come on.
(somber music)
- What about you?
What are you gonna do?
- I'm great. I'm great.
I'm gonna call you every day
and I might even have to fly you back here
to help me close some listings.
Hey, I have something of yours.
(somber music)
I think we look pretty good.
(Anna chuckles) (Andy chuckles)
(somber music)
- [Anna] I love you.
- [Andy] I love you too.
(Anna sniffles)
(somber music)
(sighs)
All right, you gotta go.
Okay?
(somber music)
Hey, we had fun today.
(cars whooshing)
(gentle upbeat music)
(gentle upbeat music continues)
(gentle upbeat music continues)
Looking at all this strange behavior
Well, I think I understand
why this lonely ghost
Is everything I wanted to know
So I follow it to any hole
It says look at this,
this is just a shadow
What you thought was
faith, that was hollow
Look at you, you've
been chasing shadows
That's why you wake up
(somber music)
(gentle upbeat music)
Holding on to all this strange behavior
Can't believe what I
thought would save me
A pretty girl
If I follow her around the world
When I catch her, she'll say to me
(somber music)
(traffic droning)
(birds chirping)
(traffic whooshing)
(siren wailing)
(car horn honks)
(knuckles rapping) (dog barking)
(knuckles rapping) (door clicks)
- I got an AC.
- D'you trade your kid for it?
- [Andy] Okay, funny.
- Marvin, wake up!
We got an air conditioner!
(upbeat music)
- Dad?
- Yeah?
- I need you to clear
out all this paint stuff.
- [Harold] Ah, no, they're drying
there. Those are my paint brushes.
- I can't fit the AC in here.
- You could put it here.
You could put it here. It'll fit perfectly.
Nice, right here. Huh?
I'm gonna go make some
coffee. You want some?
- Yeah. Don't use that milk.
- [Harold] No, I won't.
(gentle upbeat music) (Andy groans)
- [Andy] You got any spacers or foam?
(gentle upbeat music continues)
- It's gonna be a nice day, huh?
(AC squeaks)
(AC crashes) (alarm blaring)
(gentle upbeat music)
(gentle upbeat music continues)
- Okay, so here's the deal.
Your friend has not been
responding to my phone calls.
I'm running out of options
here, so you work for me now.
- Okay, okay. Hold on, hold on.
Just calm down. I have a job.
I'm a real estate agent. Work at Margolis.
I don't need to be doing business
in the back of a van, okay?
- No, it's simple.
You, uh, you work, you one of
Jed's boys now, you work for me.
I'm gonna get you a shirt.
Can I see that watch.
- I mean, it's my-
- Come on.
- Ow, ow, ow, ow.
- You know, I've been thinking about moving
from appliances into, uh, accessories.
Can you get more of these?
- No, I mean, it was, it was a gift.
- A gift? Oh, thank you.
That's very sweet.
You know, you look like a
man of questionable morals.
This feels good. Uh.
(van engine cranking)
That's it, there we go.
- [Nick] My watch. I...
It's got a chronometer.
(gentle bright upbeat music)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(fire crackling) (owl hooting)
(water sloshing) (insects chirping)
(frogs croaking)
(animal growling) (animals chittering)
(leopard growling)
(traffic droning) (birds chirping)
(engines rumbling)
(can clattering)
(spray hissing) (indicator beeping)
(crowd chattering)
(upbeat music)
- [Liz] Right, cool. So is
there anything I need to do?
- So you have two loads.
(speaks faintly)
- Mm-hmm.
- As always.
- Hey! Seems I've got to have
A change of scene
- Okay, I'll sign here.
Every night I have
The strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way
- Anna! Come on, I'm gonna be late.
Left here on my own
- Jay Cole?
It's Andy Singer, the, uh, realtor
who showed you the two-bed
last week on East 33rd?
Haven't heard from you
in a while, but I'm calling
because I got another spot
that doesn't have a leak
that I think you might like.
I'm here right now and uh, it's, uh,
it's got great light, huge windows.
But you know, these places, they go fast,
so gimme a call, okay?
Oh, no
If I'm feelin' all right
You feelin' all right
- What is that? Didn't I
tell you not to pick up trash?
- The snow leopard is sick at
the zoo and there's a protest.
- Well, that doesn't sound very safe.
- Did he tell you when
he was gonna be here?
- I tried calling him several times.
- You didn't tell him, did you?
Why are we even moving?
Florida is a shithole.
- Language! Hey, it's gonna be great.
Promise. We're gonna have more space.
- You promised you would call him, Mom.
I just can't waste my time
- I'll call him again from work,
and make sure he comes
to say goodbye tonight.
Okay? Just need you to
be a little more positive.
- Sure, I can be positive.
Positive that I'm gonna
suffocate in Florida.
- Okay. Please.
I need to get to work.
Oh, no
- God, it's so hot.
- You're moving us to a swamp.
Oh, no
Oh, no
You feelin' all right
- Right.
Oh, no
I'm not feelin' too
good, little darlin'
Oh, no
(upbeat music continues)
(singer vocalizing)
- Robert? Andy Singer.
Yeah. Andy Singer from, uh, Margolis?
Ah-huh, yeah, listen,
I found an apartment that I think you-
(customer grunts) (liquid splashes)
- [Customer] Damn, bro.
- Come on!
- Watch where you going.
- Ugh, lemme call you back.
(door thudding)
Shit!
(engines rumbling)
- [Bystander] Let's go!
(traffic light beeping)
- Hey! Hi.
Hi. Sorry!
(pants)
I'm here. I'm here.
- Andy, I thought we were
gonna meet at the office.
- [Andy] I thought it'd be easier if I
just came here. Get those keys from you.
- Right, well, I thought we
were supposed to leave 'em
with the landlord?
- Yeah. Yeah, that's okay,
I'll, I'll make sure he gets 'em.
- Okay, what about my security deposit?
- Sure. Sure, of course.
You have the inspection report, right?
- Inspection report?
- [Driver] We're parked in
front of a hydrant, we gotta go.
(tenant sighs)
- You know
what? Don't stress, I'll sign off on it
and I'll make sure they send you the check.
- Okay. Um.
Here is the mail key.
This one's the door to the
unit, and then the building.
Have fun.
- Okay. Hey, enjoy your new home.
(truck engine rumbling)
(truck door thuds)
(soft gentle dramatic music)
(gentle dramatic music)
(door thuds)
Hey! It's, uh.
It is keys.
(gentle suspenseful music)
(knuckles rapping)
- [Liz] Hi, Maria. Good morning.
I'm so sorry...
- I wasn't supposed to be on call today.
- No, no problem.
- So, thank you.
- No problem.
- Okay. Okay.
- Anna.
- I love you, baby.
Go inside.
- Anna.
- Grazia, Maria.
- [Maria] Enjoy work. Bye.
(gentle dramatic music)
- [Reporter] Another
blisteringly hot summer day
in New York City is doing
little to cool tensions
over the treatment of a
snow leopard at the city zoo.
- Maria.
(speaking Spanish)
(Maria speaking Spanish)
(baby screeching)
(Maria singing in Spanish)
(baby crying)
(Maria speaking Spanish)
(phone ringing)
(gentle dramatic music)
- [Maria] Hello.
(quirky gentle dramatic music)
(baby crying)
(suspenseful music) (door thuds)
(soft slow suspenseful music)
(door thuds)
(Andy whistles)
- Hello?
(microwave door clicks)
(microwave door thuds)
(dishwasher door thuds)
(dishwasher creaking)
(slow suspenseful music)
(Andy grunting)
(Andy sighs) (traffic droning)
(soft slow suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music)
Jackpot.
- Travis, is that everything?
- [Travis] Empty, boss.
- [Jed] Hold this.
- Hey! Hey!
Wait, this is it? It's not
even half of what you said.
- Andy, the deal is you
give me appliances of value.
What am I going to do with a microwave?
- W-what about the dishwasher?
- It's shit. It's summer.
I need air conditioning units.
We had a deal. Gimme my coffee.
- Come on! No one has ACs.
- Figure it out, Andy. You're a smart guy.
- Not that smart.
- [Jed] This guy's very unreliable.
Last month it was stoves, now this.
I'll be back. You better
have something for me today.
(van engine rumbling)
One thing after another with this guy.
The deal is though
(speaking faintly), how serious.
Heinrich, you said you had a cousin.
(birds chirping)
(dramatic music)
(lid clatters)
(wind whooshing)
(dramatic music)
(traffic droning)
(Andy grunts)
(quirky dramatic music)
It's '91, a war is on
I watch in black, white and green
My mother dances around
Like there ain't no rip in the seam
While she waltzes with ghosts
I can feel what went wrong
And she's here, but she's not
Just like her, I'm not home
(quirky dramatic music continues)
Just like her, I'm not home
Just like her, I'm not home
I'm here, but I'm not
Just like her, I'm not home
And I'm here, but I'm not
Just like you, I can't leave
I'm here, but I'm not
Just like you, I can't leave
I'm here, but I'm not
Just like you, I can't leave
(singers vocalizing) (door rattling)
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy sighs)
(drill whirring)
- [Peter] Don't stop. Take it down.
(door thudding)
Come on, keep going.
(drill whirring) (door thudding)
- What are you? Hey,
Peter, what's going on?
- [Officer] Hey!
- I have the key. You don't
have to break the door.
- Andrew Singer?
- Andy's fine.
- Notice to quit. Summons for eviction.
- Eviction? Peter, w-what is this?
You called the police?
- He's my brother-in-law.
- Wait, is this real? Are you real?
- You wanna find out?
- Peter. Peter, this is very loud.
Come on, you're not serious!
- I'm very serious.
- Peter.
Peter. Peter.
- You lock me, I break lock.
- I didn't lock you!
- This is not my lock. This is your lock!
- It's called privacy, Peter.
- Privacy, no, no, no!
- Yes, yes!
I'm allowed to change the locks on my door!
- I wait four months for rent.
- Ah-huh.
- First time I wait,
you not come back!
- Where you going?
- Second time you said,
"Oh, I'll have the money."
But no money in my hands!
- Does he need to keep doing that?
- [Peter] You make me
look like I am bad guy.
You are bad guy.
- I am not bad guy.
- Every day the same.
I work in the building,
all the tenants pay-
- Can I just say something?
- Only you not pay!
- May I speak? May I
speak? (Peter rambling)
Can I please? Peter?
Peter! Peter!
Peter!
- Please.
- Okay, look. Look.
Let's just look at things
with a bit of distance.
Okay? I rented this
building for you, right?
Every unit! I brought all these tenants in.
We had a deal!
I fill the apartment...
- You break deal.
- I rented this whole
piece of shit building,
I shouldn't have to pay!
(phone buzzing)
- Locksmith, you keep going!
- No, you know, that's. Fuck!
(train rattling)
You know, nothing works in this shithole.
You wanna see what it's like living here?
I can't even take a working shower.
Here, look at this.
(tap creaks) (water sloshing)
That usually doesn't happen.
(dramatic music)
(traffic droning) (sirens wailing)
- And you know how many
warning I give you, huh?
- [Andy] Warnings?
- I give you so many, so
many chances, that you ignore.
- I didn't think you were
serious. I thought we're friends.
- [Peter] Look how disgusting
you live in this place.
- Hey, hey! I got food in there.
(Peter speaking in foreign language)
- Yeah, I-I've no idea what you're saying.
I gotta take this.
Stop! (drill stops whirring)
(dramatic music)
This is Andy.
- When you buy this?
- Ah-huh.
- You have money for it.
- Yeah. Yeah, everything's all set.
You're gonna love it. Great, see you there.
Okay. Bye.
Don't even think about it.
Wait, you want me to melt?
(dramatic music) (Andy grunts)
- Oh, and you pay for door too, huh?
- You broke the door!
- I give chance again and
again, but you take advantage.
I am a good guy. (doorbell chiming)
- Now what? (dramatic music)
Shit!
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy sighs and mutters)
(doorbell chiming)
Hey, Peter! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
(door lock buzzing) (dramatic music)
(Andy yelling)
- [Peter] You're crazy.
(Andy continues yelling)
- [Andy] Peter!
- Dad!
- Anna!
- Hi.
(gentle quirky suspenseful music)
- Peter? You remember my daughter Anna?
- Eh, hello.
You grow very tall.
- Yes. That's what happens.
- [Anna] Hey, that's me.
- Yeah. Ah-huh, look how cute you were.
But Peter doesn't care how cute you are,
he wants you out on the streets.
- You're not going to guilt me.
- Why don't you, uh, go
wait in here for a few seconds
while the grownups talk, okay?
(door thuds)
Nice, Peter, very nice. She's 10!
Maybe she'll get lucky
and find a piss-free patch
of sidewalk to sleep on.
- [Peter] Oh, come on.
She lives with her mother.
She doesn't even come here anymore.
- [Andy] That's 'cause this is
a hostile living environment.
- [Peter] You're crazy.
- [Andy] You're constantly
changing the locks.
The stove is never working.
I don't know if the gas
is gonna leak and kill me
in the middle of the night.
- Blah, blah, blah.
This is about you owing me money.
- No, this is about right and wrong.
- Okay! I am right, you're wrong.
- Okay, look, I just need more time. Okay?
I'm about to close a deal.
That was them on the phone.
- Dad? What about my birthday?
You said we'd have the party here.
- Yes, yes, it's her birthday, Peter.
- And I already invited
Selena, Amelia, and Michelle.
- Michelle's coming?
Michelle's coming, Peter!
- Andy, please, get me money today.
I have no more time.
- Yes. Yeah, it'll happen.
- Oh, come on, let's go.
(door thuds)
- There's no way he bought that.
(sighs)
What are you doing here?
- [Anna] I tried to call.
- Well, I've been a little busy.
- [Anna] You getting kicked out?
- No, I'm not getting kicked out.
And it's not polite to eavesdrop
on other people's conversations.
- How much do you owe?
- Hm, depends on who's asking.
- [Anna] I mean, I have some money.
- Oh geez.
- [Anna] What happened to your shirt?
- You know, I'm very happy to see you,
but it's really not a good time.
- I'm already here!
- Well, I have showings all day!
- [Anna] I thought we
could spend the day together.
You could take me to lunch.
Or maybe we could go to the zoo?
- [Andy] The zoo? Anna, I've gotta work.
- [Anna] I saw your headshots.
You still going on auditions?
- Yes. I'm still doing that, when I can.
- [Anna] Mom said you gave up.
- Yeah well, your mother's
quicker to give up than I am.
- [Anna] How old is this?
(camera clicks and whirs)
- [Andy] We gotta get
you back to your mother's.
- [Anna] I just got here.
- I have to work!
- Well, I'm not leaving.
- Oh, yes you are.
(quirky dramatic music)
- [Anna] Is this really necessary?
- I'm not taking you to the zoo.
- This is just gonna make her mad.
- What else is new?
- She's on call.
- Well, that's not my problem.
- You're not gonna make
it back for your showing.
- Wanna bet?
- Can you please just put me down?
- How do I know you're not gonna run away?
- Because we're moving.
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy sighs)
- What?
- [Anna] We're moving.
- Moving? Moving where?
- Florida.
- Florida?
- [Anna] Orlando, actually.
(Andy sighs)
- This was not part of the agreement.
She can't just move without telling me.
Orlando? You kidding me?
Wait till I tell my lawyer.
- When d'you get a lawyer?
- Come on, Anna, let's go.
- She's just gonna tell you
to take me back to Maria's.
(quirky suspenseful music)
- Who's Maria?
- Wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
No! Dad!
(Andy exclaiming)
- Who's that?
- That's him.
- He's bald.
- [Anna] I know.
- Your mother's impressed too easily.
I told her that when we got together.
They getting married?
- I don't know.
- You didn't ask.
- What, you want me to?
(phone buzzing)
- Stay here.
This is Andy.
Yes. Hi, uh.
No, I-I-I got delayed a little bit.
No, no, no, no, no.
Don't, don't go anywhere.
I'm like a few blocks away. Okay?
Yep. Bye.
(staff chattering)
Anna! Here, hold this.
- [Anna] What?
(gentle music) (phone ringing)
- Not here.
- Lead the way.
- [Liz] Don't move.
- [Announcer] Paging
Dr. Simon. Dr. Simon, please.
(door thuds)
- I do not...
- Lower your voice.
You know, your daughter
showed up at my doorstep-
- Our daughter. this morning.
- Our daughter, you dick.
- I'm sorry, our daughter
showed up on my doorstep this morning.
You know what she told me?
That you're moving to Orlando?
- Why don't you lower your
voice? People are working.
- You can't move without telling me.
And you can't raise a kid in Orlando.
- Yeah, actually I could
do whatever I want.
That's what sole custody means, moron.
- Well, seeing as how you have
sole custody, why don't you take our
daughter, and have a great day?
- No. No.
You need to take her
home, 'cause I'm on call.
- Oh, I have to work too!
- Yeah, putting gel in your hair
and lying to people doesn't count as work.
- I use mousse.
- Take her to Maria. You owe me this.
- I know what I owe you.
- [Liz] You think this is about money?
- [Andy] You took her
away because of money, so.
- I didn't take her away from you.
The court took her away from you
because they agreed with me.
Don't answer that!
- I, this is work, okay?
I really don't have time for this today.
Unless you wanna pay my rent this month,
I need to work.
- I'm able to work full-time
and take care of her seven days a week.
Why don't you be a
responsible father for one day?
- I am extremely responsible.
I brought her here!
- Yeah. Take her to Maria.
- Who the fuck is Maria?
(dramatic music)
Oh, she thinks she can
move without telling me.
(sirens wailing)
Hey, come on. Come on, come on.
- Can you just slow down?
- Can you speed up?
I've got clients waiting.
- Your legs are longer than mine.
- [Andy] God, it's hot.
(bright dramatic music)
- Come on, you're stepping on my toes.
- I'm sorry.
- Dad!
- What?
- This isn't even my train.
- Yeah, I'm not taking you
home. I don't have time.
- So I can stay with you?
- Yes, you can stay with me.
But if you get in the way-
- I'll be good, okay? I'll help you.
- Okay, great. Well, help
me by making this train.
Come on. Come on, come on!
- [Anna] Wait up!
(bright dramatic music)
- Come on, come on.
- [Announcer] Stand clear
of the closing doors, please.
- [Andy] All right, let's
find a clean seat, uh.
- [Anna] Where are we
gonna sit? It's packed.
(bright upbeat music)
What about over there?
- [Andy] No, don't sit there. It's dirty.
- That one?
- Okay, this one, this one. Come on.
(train whooshing) (bright upbeat music)
- So, what's my job?
- Your job is to let me do
my job and stay outta the way.
- Can I help with that?
- No, Anna, I have to be focused, okay?
It's a big day. I need to be sharp.
Where is it?
Oh, here it is. Okay.
All right, it's a one-bedroom, pre-war,
built 1921, 2,850 gross, 2,300 net.
Wow, that's a lot for a one-bedroom.
It's a beautiful one-bedroom, folks.
It's a beautiful one-bedroom, folks.
As you can see, tons of exposed brick.
Lots of sunlight.
You're really getting a great deal here.
You're really gettin' a great deal here.
Uh, the building was built in 19-
- 21.
- Thank you. 1921.
And uh, it's, uh...
What is that?
- I got it this morning.
- Fight for animal rights.
Cool. The building was built in 1921.
As you can see from the
very detailed crown molding...
Is your bag on the floor of the subway?
Anna, hasn't anyone ever taught you
that every single surface in
New York, especially the subway,
has been touched by people
with shit on their hands?
Hey, come on. Gross.
Okay, now I'm covered in rat piss.
(Anna laughs)
What are you doing? 1921, all right.
Watch your step.
(door creaks)
(door thuds)
- $2,800. I saw one
yesterday for $600 less.
And it was bigger.
- Yeah, well...
- It's a pre-war.
Lots of charm.
- [Customer] How old is this place?
- It's, uh...
- It was built in 1921.
Hm, lots of history.
- History? What, like bedbugs?
- What? No, no, no, no.
You'll get a full report.
The landlord or management has to
notify you... This place is a mess, man.
- Yeah, they, they're gonna
clean it before you move in.
- I don't know, seems
a little bit too small.
- Small? I mean.
- There's a toilet in the living room.
(sirens wailing)
- Yeah, they're gonna
move that into the bathroom,
which has a shower, by the way.
- Is that supposed to be a luxury?
(gentle upbeat music)
- If you're gonna chime in,
you need to know what to say.
- I was right. That's when it was built.
- Well, there's such a thing
as too much information.
(car horns honking)
And you got a movie theater
right around the corner.
Uh, there's tons of great restaurants.
- [Customer] This is really tight, man.
You sure this is legal?
- Yeah.
- [Anna] Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Seems like it's a fire hazard.
- I-I don't understand. There's no stove.
- Uh, no, no, but-
- How can there be no stove?
- Well, it's, it's pretty standard.
I mean, I didn't have a
stove in my first apartment.
Uh, do you have a hot plate?
- And what makes you
think it's my first apartment?
- [Customer] Is there not a doorman?
- [Andy] No, this is a pre-war.
And if you want, I can show
you some condo apartments.
- [Customer] My friend lives in a pre-war.
She has a doorman.
- Hi, sorry. Uh, uh.
Sorry, back up, back up, back up.
(door thuds)
Okay.
- What do you want me to do?
- No worries.
Yeah. Nope, it's okay.
- Okay.
- Okay.
All right.
- Ow.
- Oops.
- Sorry.
- It's a great location.
And, and for the price.
- And why is there no air conditioner?
- No, they never come
with air conditioning.
- It's summer!
- You could open a window.
(gentle upbeat music)
(panting)
- [Andy] Fuck it.
Do you even wanna see the inside?
- What about a floor plan?
(slow dramatic music)
- The floor is made of wood.
(Andy sighs)
- Come on, hurry up!
- Where are we going?
(gentle dramatic music)
Okay, these are my last leads.
Just stay here. Don't move.
- I'm helping you.
- Help? We haven't closed one listing.
- [Anna] So you want me to sit here
alone on the street with strangers?
- Yes, don't move. Let me handle this.
- [Anna] It's hot.
- Don't move.
(gentle dramatic music)
Excuse me, hi. Sorry.
It's been a hell of a day.
- Andy, right?
- Andy, hi. Yes, uh, Andy, yes.
Yes, all right. Ah, lock box.
Okay, here we go.
(gentle dramatic music)
(sirens wailing)
(protesters yelling)
(gentle dramatic music continues)
- Um, excuse me. What's
up with this zoo protest?
- Oh, we're actually gonna
go march through the park,
protesting animal cruelty.
- For who?
- For Summit, the snow leopard.
You know, you should come.
(gentle dramatic music)
(lock clatters)
- Have we met before?
- Uh, I don't think so.
- You were in that commercial.
With, um, toothpaste.
- That was me.
- I knew it.
(vocalizes)
You look a lot older.
(lock clatters) (Andy sighs)
- You know what? I have a key.
I have a key.
It's a really, really great unit.
Um, somebody does have an application in,
but if we act fast...
- Wait, someone has an application in?
- Uh, well, uh, yes, but you know,
there's this approval process.
- [Customer] So someone's already signed?
- Uh, yes, well.
- So why did you have us come here?
- Look, it doesn't mean
they're gonna get the unit.
Okay? It, it just means that-
(protesters yelling)
(gentle dramatic music)
(Andy chattering)
Why don't we, why don't we just go inside?
(bicycle thuds) (keys clattering)
Shit!
(suspenseful music)
Uh. Hold on one second.
Gimme a minute, okay?
All right, it's, it's, it's, just,
just, just bear with me.
- [Jackson] Andy!
- Jackson.
- Ooh, this traffic was a nightmare.
I didn't know if we were
gonna make it over here.
You, uh, you need a hand?
- No, no, I'm okay.
No, no, no, no, no, no. I got it.
I got it, okay? It's fine.
- Here for the one-bed?
- Yeah. Yeah, we're here for the one-bed.
Just gimme a second.
- I can take 'em up.
Uh, we're seeing the unit next door.
- Look, the key is here, okay?
It's just, I-I just need a minute.
- Dad.
- Hey.
It's okay. It's okay.
Anna, Anna! It's okay.
Just stop!
- Uh, yeah, we're gonna go with, um-
- Jackson.
- Hi.
- [Customer] Hello, Jackson. How are you?
- Lovely. Andy, don't worry.
Take your time.
Take your time, Andy.
Take your time.
(door creaks and thuds)
(car horns honking)
(TV crowd chattering)
(traffic whooshing)
(coins clattering)
(cash register whirring)
(bystander speaking in foreign language)
(traffic rumbling)
- Here.
- I'm not hungry.
- I told you not to move.
- I didn't go anywhere.
- Well, I couldn't see you.
- They came up to me.
I went right back to the bench.
I didn't do anything wrong.
(sighs)
- You don't have a cellphone, do you?
I think I broke this.
- I'm 10. And why didn't you let me help?
I could've done way more
than just bake on that corner.
- You're 10!
- So?
- Oh, Anna, this is hard work. Okay?
If you're lucky, if you're lucky,
you get a few showings a week,
maybe one of 'em puts money in your pocket.
But it takes time, which I do not have.
- Well, we can't just give up.
We can find new apartments or new people.
- Oh, people? People?
You know, do you have a friend
who needs a new apartment,
or better yet, do you have,
uh, $7,000 in that backpack?
Because I'm four months behind on my rent,
and unless I can close
an apartment by today,
I'm gonna lose mine.
- Maria says she's
looking for a bigger place.
- Oh, Maria said that? Oh,
okay, oh wait, Maria said that.
Okay. Ah, God!
(traffic whooshing)
(Anna sighs)
Dad?
- You can't leave me here.
- Who's that?
- It's me!
- Andy?
- Yes, Dad.
- I'm not staying here.
- [Harold] Anna, is that you?
- Hi, Grandpa.
- [Harold] I heard you're moving.
- [Anna] Yeah, the
movers came this morning.
We leave tomorrow.
- Wait, you knew she was moving?
- [Harold] There was an enormous protest
out front here before.
- [Anna] Yeah, we saw 'em too.
- Unbelievable.
- People complain about
everything all the time.
Look at these beautiful vegetables.
How can anyone throw them
out? You can make a stew.
- You're making soup? It's boiling in here.
- Well, the AC is out.
(sighs)
- Dad! How old is this?
- Ah, don't throw it out.
It's good for thickening.
(clears throat)
- You know, Anna really wanted
to see you before she moved.
- Umm-hmm.
- Yeah.
I thought she could hang here today.
- Anna!
- I'm helping you.
- [Harold] Can you get
me that brush in the sink?
- Well, this would be more helpful.
- You suck.
- Anna?
(Harold groans)
- There's two!
- Uh, the filbert,
the thick one, the
hairs look like hazelnuts.
- I thought you were
gonna clean this place?
- [Harold] It's clean.
- Look at this. Why are
Mom's clothes still here?
- Thank you. Come here.
You see...
- Dad!
- This is for detail.
Those little lines, they
get smaller and smaller,
and so it makes things look further away.
- It's an illusion?
- Exactly.
- Shit.
- What are you looking for?
- There was a box here.
- [Harold] Oh, that's all gone.
- What?
- I used it all.
(soft slow upbeat music)
(record needle scratches)
- That was Mom's money.
- Well, she's dead. What
she's gonna do with it now?
- Dad?
- I needed it for my
mortgage. My pension kicked.
- Wait, wait, wait. What?
- I needed it for my mortgage.
My pension kicked.
- I heard you.
What, what, what do you
mean your pension kicked?
- It's all in the letters over there.
(Harold clears throat)
- Why didn't you tell me?
Dad! We need to talk about these.
(toilet rumbling)
- Hey!
- Who's that?
- My roommate, Marvin.
- Roommate?
- Yeah. I put a bed in, in Mom's office.
I used Craigslist. I didn't
have to pay a broker.
- I'm a broker.
- Yeah, there's a lot
of con artists out there.
- You know, I knew a broker.
He's in jail now.
Huh!
(clock ticking)
- All right, what's wrong?
- Nothing's wrong.
- You never come by
unless you're in trouble.
Are you in trouble?
- [Andy] I'm fine. I just
need you to watch her.
- [Harold] I have plans.
- What plans? With, uh, uh, Marvin?
- Andy, I'm here for you,
but I cannot take her today.
- Look, I need to find new clients,
get apartments for those clients, it's like
"Ring Around the Rosie."
- She's a big kid.
Put her to work.
It is not my job to watch your daughter.
What's that saying about fruit?
- "The man is not a piece of fruit."
- I don't know how that applies.
- It applies.
Look Andy, you're a good
father when you don't try to be.
I need to paint.
(Andy sighs)
(elevator rattles) (quirky dramatic music)
(elevator squeaking)
- You got paint on your bag.
(elevator bell dings)
Come on. We can do this.
Just gotta regroup, you know? Focus.
- This is where you work?
- Here.
(quirky dramatic music)
Don't talk to anybody.
- I'm hungry.
- We'll eat after I'm done here.
- The neighborhood is
great. (speaks faintly)
(items clattering)
- What's this?
- Those are uptown houses.
I don't show them very often.
- Home.
It is a pet-friendly. (speaking faintly)
(quirky dramatic music)
(colleague speaking faintly)
- [Colleague] Where's he
coming from? He's so sweaty.
- Hear you.
I can hear you!
- I guess he can hear us.
- Is there something you wanna say to me?
(quirky dramatic music)
(elevator bell dings)
Michael?
- I'm on lunch.
- Stay here. Michael, wait.
Michael, wait!
(quirky dramatic music)
(phone ringing)
(car horns honking)
You can't ignore me!
Come on, Michael. Don't run away.
- We do this after lunch.
- I need a favor.
I need an advance.
(Michael scoffs) (traffic droning)
- You serious?
- They're trying to kick
me out of my apartment.
- You haven't closed a
single property in two months.
You know how much of a shit show
that makes for me in this office?
- You're giving me shit listings!
- Everybody gets shit listings.
I should fire you.
- You can't. I work on commission.
- What commission?
- Do you know how hard it is
to convince people to rent
one of these sweat boxes?
Our units are shit.
Half of 'em don't even have appliances.
- That reminds me.
Did you ever figure out what happened to
those appliances at that two-bed on 82nd?
- Oh my God. We've been through this.
I came back here and dropped off the keys.
Whatever happened after
that has nothing to do with me!
- Ah-huh, ah-huh.
- Look, look, look, I just
need one good listing.
Like the ones you give Jackson.
- Hey, I didn't give anyone anything.
It gets listed on the
board like everything else.
I got a lot of mouths to feed.
- Well, I'm starving, Michael!
And now my daughter,
she's gonna starve too.
Come on. I know you give
the good shit to Jackson.
- He has clients!
- He stole my clients!
- Oh, you know this world, Andy!
You need new clients,
you go get new clients.
Get your hands dirty.
None of these guys play by the rules.
Jesus. Can I get some relish?
(motorbike engine rumbling)
Look, you'll be fine.
(car horns honking)
Maybe someone will
appreciate that cute face.
(bystander whistling)
(car horns honking)
(slow upbeat music)
(elevator bell dings)
(phone ringing) (slow upbeat music)
- Hey, you said you wanted to help, right?
- Yeah.
- We're a team, right?
- We're a team.
- Right, okay.
You're my lookout.
If anybody starts to come
back there, you gimme a signal.
- Wait, what?
- We're a team.
- Wait, what's the signal?
(quirky suspenseful music)
(quirky dramatic music)
(elevator bell dings) (Jackson chattering)
(quirky dramatic music continues)
Dad!
Dad!
- My lady.
Watch me working the board.
Claudia, new clients. New clients, Claudia.
(Jackson chuckles)
- [Nick] Hey.
- Hi.
- You're Singer's kid, right?
Is he around?
- He just stepped out.
- [Nick] Is he working on something?
- This piece of shit.
- Good stuff?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
- Is it,
one, two, three, four?
That's it. You gotta be kidding me.
(Nick speaking faintly)
(quirky dramatic music)
- Watch.
- Mm-hmm, yes.
- [Nick] Check this out.
It's a big responsibility.
(quirky suspenseful
music) (mouse key clicking)
(keyboard keys clacking)
Come on!
Here we go.
Okay!
(quirky suspenseful music)
- [Nick] Yep, Margolis
gave it to me himself.
He only gives it to the best of the best.
- I'll just take it myself.
- It's pretty cool.
It's got a little Chronometer.
- You okay?
I'm just gonna get you some water.
(quirky dramatic music)
- Andy!
- You seem dangerous.
(quirky dramatic music)
(bag thuds)
- [Nick] Oh, oopsie daisy.
- [Jackson] Oh, let help you out.
- [Nick] Not a big deal.
Ah, yes. Get down here and.
- [Jackson] Hey, gimme a second here.
Get down there.
Hey, it's Anna, right?
We meet again.
This is what it is.
- Anna!
- Has this, right?
- [Nick] Andy.
- Andy, I'll let you clean this up.
Now come on.
Hey, don't worry about her.
You're gonna love this apartment.
(papers rustling)
(bag thuds)
- Tough morning?
- Back off, Nick.
- Those are your clients, right?
I mean, that can't be
very good for business.
- You ready?
Come on, come on, come on. Let's go!
Nick, you mind?
- Uh, Andy? You know you got
something on your shirt, right?
- [Andy] Piece of shit.
(elevator rattles) (elevator squeaking)
- So did you get it?
(keys jangling)
(elevator squeaking)
(phone keys beeping)
- Hey, I got a, I got a
two-bed on 68th Street.
Ah-huh. Okay, well I got
a-another spot on 74th.
And then there's one on 96th,
if that's not too far up there for ya.
Yeah! Yeah, let me just jot that down.
Anna! Pen, pen!
Yeah, sorry, I'm calling
from my office line.
Uh, we got the windows open.
Okay, great. Perfect.
Okay, see you then. Hey!
Hey, what are you doing?
(dramatic music)
- Dad!
- Let me go!
- Hurry up! Travis, don't
leave the child on the sidewalk.
Let's go. Watch her head.
- [Travis] Okay. There you go.
(suspenseful music)
(tires screeching) (van engine rumbling)
- This is not what we do,
Jed. This is not what we do!
- Oh, no, no, no, Andy, you broke our deal.
I asked you for functioning
air conditioning units.
You give me broken dishwashers.
This is a simple transaction.
Working appliances for money. Okay?
When you give me broken
appliances, I break something
of yours like your
pinky or your ring finger.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- Yeah, tell, tell him, tell
him how you feel, Jaime.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- What is he saying?
- When d'you start selling lemons?
- Lemons?
- They're all lemons.
- These are the top of the line!
- And he's asking what's wrong with you.
- Everything you give me...
- And that's all your fault.
- This isn't my fault.
- And he paid you this morning,
even though he shouldn't have.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- [Jed] See, this is how you upset him.
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
- [Jed] How do you raise a child like this?
- I don't think I'm
allowed to say that word.
- Shouldn't you be in school?
This is very bad parenting.
- This is ridiculous.
I don't have time for this.
I'm with my kid. I'm on the clock.
What are you doing?
- D'you think these guys like
carrying broken dishwashers
up five flights of stairs
in 100 degrees heat?
They do not, Andy. They do not.
- Well, they weren't broken when I got 'em.
- I apologize for not believing you,
but you've lost a bit of credibility
as far as I'm concerned.
- Jed, these aren't broken.
(Jed speaking Spanish)
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
(dog growls)
- Okay. Okay, okay!
Okay, okay. Jed, Jed, listen.
I got two spots right now.
One across the river.
- You got a place?
- Another uptown.
- Okay.
- You go up there, I sign
you in with the doorman.
I'm sure they got something real nice.
- [Jed] You better not
be messing with me, Andy.
You better not be messing with me.
You are shaping up to be
one hell of a disappointment
in my life.
(gentle suspenseful
music) (traffic whooshing)
(car horns honking)
(upbeat music)
- [Doorman] I'll call you back.
- Hi, there. Uh, we are
here to see apartment 4D.
I'm from Margolis.
- You're?
- I'm the rental agent.
I, uh, I have a key.
(keys jangle)
- [Doorman] And her.
- That's my daughter.
- Sign in here, please.
- [Andy] Thanks.
(upbeat music)
- Hey, hey. I would like to see this one.
- That's not my listing.
- I can tell. It has very
high-end appliances.
- Yeah, it's the penthouse.
- Andy, I am done with
your shithole listings.
Do you understand?
Jed...
- That one's open, if
you wanna take 'em up.
- Thanks, boss.
(upbeat music)
- Thanks a lot.
(quirky suspenseful music)
Come on.
- Make sure you wipe your boots.
(hand thuds)
- So we're just breaking and entering now?
- Not breaking. Just entering.
- Andy. Andy!
Why did you take me to an open house?
- You're the one who wanted
to come up here. I didn't know.
- Explain to me how it's always my job
to figure out how to solve your problems
that you create for...
- Hi!
Are you guys here for the open house?
- Open house? Yes.
- Yes. Here, take a brochure.
And you're here for the washer?
- Uh, yep.
- Great, amazing.
We called management this morning.
We didn't know that maintenance
could come today. Come on.
(soft gentle music)
(guests softly chattering)
Okay. You can install this?
- Oh yeah.
- Great.
- Anna, just smile, and
smile, hi, how are you?
You have to blend in.
- [Anna] What about them?
- [Andy] Yeah, I'm still figuring that out.
- Wow.
- It's nice, right?
No trains waking you up in
the middle of the night here.
- [Travis] Wow. Rad, boss.
- Get up. Go find me something.
- [Anna] I like listening
to the trains at night.
- Oh shit, that's a broker.
See how everybody's talking to him?
That's what happens when
you have a place like this.
Names, phone numbers,
email. You get it all.
- All right, all I need is
name, phone number, email.
That's it. Here you go.
Great place, right?
(sighs)
Beautiful.
- Well, I need to get...
- Those windows, huh?
- No, Anna!
- Hey.
- Hey.
- You look very familiar.
- I, I don't know.
- You're an actor?
- Yeah.
- I've seen you in something.
- Uh, yeah, well, I just, uh,
I did a toothpaste ad.
- Makes sense. Very cute smile.
- Oh, well you! Please.
That's why I got cast.
- Who are you here with?
- Uh, that's my daughter.
- Oh, that's cute.
- Yeah.
You here with your dad?
- No, that's my husband.
- Oh!
- But it's fine.
- Ah-huh. You guys looking to buy?
- Yeah, actually.
- Yeah? Well, I gotta be honest with you.
This place, it's not a very good deal.
- [Jed] Hey, Jaime! I might
need your muscle on this one.
- It's not a co-op building either.
And, uh, and...
- Wait, tell me a little
bit more about those.
- Why are you doing this?
- Because your dad can't
seem to keep his promises.
(soft gentle music)
(guests softly chattering)
- So is this worth a lot?
- Yeah. I'm sorry, can I
help you with something?
- [Travis] Jed, it's a Ninja BL660.
- Wow! Let's make a pile.
- Look, I know you think you're real tough,
but I'm not scared of you.
- That's because I am a nice guy.
- So this is what you wanted
to do when you grew up?
- Hey, Jaime, do you think
we could fit a small child
in this washer machine?
- Hmm, Si.
- How tall are you?
- Four foot, five.
- A four foot, five child
in this washer machine?
(Jaime speaking Spanish)
(speaking Spanish)
- That means yes.
- I have another apartment
that's, uh, downstairs.
Actually, it's not as big
obviously, but it's better priced.
Why don't you take my card?
- So this, this isn't your showing?
- Uh.
- No, it's mine.
And if I didn't know any better, I'd say
you're trying to steal some of my clients.
- No, I think, uh, I think
there's been some confusion.
Um.
- What's, uh,
I'm sorry, I didn't get your name.
- Yeah, it's, it's Andy.
And, uh, I was just explaining here
that, that I'm a realtor too.
- Oh, okay, and what, uh, chop shop,
shithouse brokerage do you work for?
- I-I-I work for Margolis downtown. Yeah!
- Wait, hold on. You one
of, you one of Mike's boys?
Is he here right now? Is he here?
What, is this like a joke or something?
Is he? Where is he?
- What?
- Where's Mike?
- Why are you staring at me
like an exotic bird?
- Can you hold this?
- [Jed] Uh, no. I'm not a side table.
Hey, where, where is she-
- Hey, Dad!
These guys are stealing, and they asked me
if I wanted to see the inside of their van.
- What happened?
(dramatic music)
What? Are you okay?
Hi. Um, what are you doing in here?
- I was just gonna swap it out.
It's a swap out.
- Oh, what? All right,
everybody, everything's okay.
Uh, right, have some
cheeses? New York, right?
(dramatic music) (car horns honking)
- That was, uh, pretty smooth.
- Yeah, but I didn't finish eating.
- Well, there's some time before
we have to meet these girls.
What are you in the mood for?
- [Anna] Hmm.
(children yelling) (water splashing)
(tap creaks) (Andy panting)
(Andy sighing)
- Shit.
(tap creaks) (water sloshing)
(knuckles rapping)
(hand banging)
(patrons chattering) (dishes clattering)
What do you think?
(camera whirring)
- I already ordered.
- I was talking about the stain.
(camera thuds) (soft music)
(keys jangling)
You know, this may
come as a surprise to you,
but sometimes I'm not
as confident as I seem.
I can't do my job looking
and smelling like a part-time barista.
- So when d'you start stealing appliances?
- Look, if you couldn't tell,
I'm in a bit of a financial situation.
I need a few extra bucks here and there.
So sometimes I...
- Steal?
- It's apartments people have left. Okay?
So we take an appliance or two.
Nobody notices. Doesn't hurt the tenants.
Barely hurts the landlords.
Or management, you
know, 'cause they're insured.
Worst case scenario, they don't get
their full security deposit back.
Which believe me, they don't need.
Thanks.
(keys clatter)
(sighs)
You know that was alive at some point.
- It's a veggie burger.
(scoffs)
- Gross.
- Why can't you do another commercial?
- Huh?
- Why can't you do another commercial,
like the toothpaste one?
- I can't just do another commercial.
I mean, I wish I could.
I- I could pay a whole year of rent
with one of those commercials.
- [Anna] You only do it for the money?
- What's wrong with that?
- Mom says that's why you
never got put into any real movies.
- [Andy] Oh yeah? What else did she say?
- You constantly make bad decisions.
- Mm-hmm.
- And you never listen to
her opinion on anything.
- Is that all?
- She thinks that you're
only in love with yourself.
She was upset about that for a long time.
- Well, she seems to
be doing just fine now.
(soft gentle music)
(vocalist singing faintly)
(Andy clicks tongue and sniffs)
- [Cheryl] And finally receive
some relief from this heat.
We'll have another check of
the weather in just 10 minutes.
But now more on the
protests surrounding the death
of a snow leopard at the city zoo.
- Anna, look, it's your protest.
- Braving the heat, to
call for an investigation
into the death of Summit,
after the snow leopard
collapsed late last night
as temperatures rose across the city.
New York 1's Erin Billups
joins us live with more. Erin?
- [Erin] Protestors began
lining up earlier this morning.
Organizers are warning there are-
- [Andy] What is it with these people?
Don't they have jobs?
- Aggressive animal rights activists,
posting die-ins across the city.
(soft gentle music)
(vocalist singing faintly)
- I'm full.
- You barely ate half.
- It's huge.
- Take another bite.
- I'm full.
- I'm not gonna let you
waste that whole thing.
- We don't have to go
back to your office, do we?
- No.
- [Anna] Are you really
friends with that guy Nick?
- What? Friends with Nick?
No. Nick is completely manipulative.
He looks for what you care about the most
and he tries, usually unsuccessfully,
to take that thing for himself
and use it against you.
Nick is like some kind of a, a-
- Cockroach.
- Cockroach! Exactly.
- No. Look!
(vocalist singing faintly)
Don't.
(hand bangs) (cockroach squelches)
Kill it!
(cockroach squelches)
(Anna gasps)
(soft gentle music)
(vocalist singing faintly)
(dishes clattering)
- When I say so, I want you to stand up
and scream as loud as you can.
Anna? I want you to get
up and make it big, okay?
It's gotta be huge.
- This is never gonna work.
- Come on, Anna, it's now or never.
(patron softly chattering)
(hands bang) (Anna screaming)
Oh my God! What's wrong?
- Cockroach!
- Oh, that's disgusting! Miss?
Miss! Can you come here please?
She's 10 years old! Look at her.
How does cockroach find
its way into a hamburger?
Can you tell me?
- [Chef] It's not my fault.
I'm sorry, I can't help you.
- At the very least,
at the very least, I should
get some sort of refund.
- Don't you feel bad?
- About what?
That burger cost them nothing.
- Not the food, for the cook.
- Oh, he'll be fine.
- He did nothing wrong.
- Neither did we. That place was infested.
This was an opportunity, not a crime.
- It's still wrong.
- Well, so was getting kidnapped,
but I didn't hear you
complaining about that.
- [Anna] He'll get fired.
- He's not gonna get fired. He'll be fine.
- Maybe I should go back to your office.
Let 'em know that
they're missing some keys.
I'm sure you'll be fine.
- Grow up, Anna.
- I'm not the one
who's acting like a child.
- There are other matters
a bit more pressing.
- Like your apartment?
- Yes, like my apartment.
Hey, I'm not forcing you to be here.
I still have to make sure
that I have a roof over my head
by the end of the night.
- I'm not trying to get in the way of that.
I've been trying to help
you all day. I just wanted-
- I know, I know, you
wanna see a snow leopard.
Well, guess what?
You can't just show up on my doorstep
and expect me to drop everything
just so I can take you to some stupid zoo.
- I haven't seen you in months
and you're 30 blocks away.
What are you gonna do
when I'm 3,000 miles away?
- You know what I'm gonna do?
I'm gonna thank my lucky stars
that I gave your mother sole custody.
(wind whooshing)
(car horns honking)
Anna!
Hey! Hey, Anna!
I was just kidding, okay? Geez.
Hello?
(bus rumbling)
(phone buzzing)
Hello? Hello?
Hello? Sorry, my phone...
Hello?
Shit.
(gentle melancholic music)
(Andy sighs)
(bell ringing)
Hey, hey! We're getting off.
- This isn't us.
- I wanna show you something.
If you still wanna go to
Mom's I'll take you after, okay?
Come on. Please?
(bus brakes hiss) (bus rattles)
(car horns honking)
(gentle melancholic music)
(chain clattering)
(dog barking)
It's okay.
Come on.
(gentle melancholic music continues)
Watch your step.
Can you believe they
just left it like this?
Try to imagine it.
Kitchen. Living room.
Your room was gonna be here.
Would've been amazing.
- This is the apartment?
Mom said it was a big crazy dream.
- It was. You see all these skyscrapers?
You know, the people who live there
aren't any different than you or me.
So you chase it, 'cause you
think you could get it too.
But you can't.
No matter how much
you think you deserve it.
Anyway, you shouldn't listen to me.
I'm a pretty shitty role model.
- I know, but Mom says
you could bitch about things
or you could do something.
- That doesn't mean you should run away.
That's not gonna stop this move.
- So would the couch go here?
- No, no, no, see, too many people
wanna put the couch against the wall.
You gotta break up the space.
I would've put the couch right there
so it still opens into the kitchen.
And then that would've been our room.
- You know she doesn't hate you.
- I don't hate her either.
(helicopter whirring)
- It's so hot.
- I know, I know, but you know,
we gotta keep pushing, right?
- Are you sure we going the right way?
- Yes. Yeah, definitely.
It's, I know it's in this area.
It's, Jed's guys took the
addresses I wrote down, so.
- 210 on 52nd. You said it in the van.
- I am so glad you showed up this morning.
- Dad!
- I mean it.
You know, y-Mom has you every day.
- Whatever. Shit!
- Hey, hey. Come on, language.
Oh shit.
(dramatic music)
Do you know what this is?
- Tetanus infection?
- This is the answer
to all of our problems.
(dramatic music)
Oh yeah! Look at this gem.
(door thuds)
This place will rent itself.
(Andy panting)
(Andy gasps)
Oh! Oh!
- Are we gonna plug it in?
- No, it'll fall out the
window if I don't do it right.
(Andy panting)
What? We're giving them a free AC.
They can install it themselves.
(footsteps thudding)
(traffic droning)
(door thuds)
- [Anna] It's a little dirty.
- Yeah? Let's do some cleaning.
(chuckles)
(Andy panting)
How about you start in the bathroom?
- So what should I say?
- You don't have to say anything,
you just have to wait for my signal.
- But I have to wait down here?
Are you sure this is even gonna work?
- Yes. Yeah.
Look, look, we just need to make
them feel like they're missing out.
You know, like it's a
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity,
but if they don't act fast,
somebody's gonna snatch
it from right under their nose.
- So I'm gonna sign the lease?
- What? No, no.
You're gonna stay here, wait for my signal,
I could see you from the window,
and I'll take it from there.
(car horn honks)
- I think they're here.
- Yeah. All right, that's them.
Showtime.
- After this, we'll go to the zoo?
- [Andy] After this, I'll take it
under serious consideration.
(traffic whooshing and rumbling)
(quirky suspenseful music)
(doors thudding)
- So as you can see,
it really gets amazing light.
Um, southeast exposure.
From the roof you can see
straight through the park.
I don't know how much
longer this place is gonna last.
(quirky suspenseful
music) (car horns honking)
(traffic droning)
- It's hot.
- Well, it won't be
once we get this little baby installed.
(sirens wailing) (foot thuds)
Oh, did I mention it
comes with the apartment?
Free-of-charge. Last tenant left it.
- Do you think it'll be too loud?
- Too loud? No, no, no.
These are, uh, these are
city windows. Very thick.
- Can we see the bathroom?
- Yeah! Yeah, it's just
right around the corner.
(quirky suspenseful music)
(car horns honking)
(traffic droning)
(suspenseful music)
(traffic whooshing)
- I can take pictures?
- Go for it.
- All right. It's a panorama thing.
- Okay.
Are you trying to?
- Do, do you mind?
Sorry. Okay, great.
Cool. Okay.
Hey, right this way.
(dramatic music) (customer scoffs)
(protesters yelling)
(phone buttons clacking)
- [Recording] Your call cannot
be completed at this time.
Please try again later.
(protesters yelling)
(recording speaking faintly)
(quirky dramatic music) (car horns honking)
- Excuse me, sir? Can I use your phone?
- There's a payphone outside.
- It's broken. I can't find my Mom or Dad.
They were supposed to be...
- What do I look like, kid?
(gentle suspenseful music)
- Please?
- You guys need a microwave?
It comes with the apartment.
Oh!
You know what, I need to take this.
Sorry. This is Andy.
Yes, it is. Yes!
Yes, the first month's free.
Ah-huh. No, no, no one's
submitted anything yet.
Crazy, I know.
No, it's definitely one of
the best apartments I've got.
I'm actually, uh, showing
it to some clients right now.
- Excuse me?
- Well, you know, there's some
interest, but I don't know how serious.
(customers whispering)
You'd wanna sign sight unseen?
- Excuse me!
- Just, I'm sorry, just one second.
- We wanna take it!
(gentle dramatic music)
- You know what, lemme just
finish here and I'll call you right back.
- You happy now?
Look at this. You sweat all over my phone.
- Well, you're covered in blood.
(protesters yelling)
- Hey! Hey, hey, hey, no, no, no.
Get outta here! Get outta here!
Get going! Keep it moving,
right now, right now!
(protesters yelling) (dramatic music)
(suspenseful music)
- Pay the difference?
- I mean, like $50.
- Are you crazy? That's not fair.
You have an extra 100 square feet.
- You could pay an extra thousand
dollars and still have space for a dresser.
You're the one who wanted to live uptown.
- Not for this much.
- Well, then let's-
- (stammers) Sorry, sorry.
Uh, uh, I'm just gonna
be in the other room.
I'll give you guys privacy to,
you know, mull it over. Okay?
(dramatic music) (protesters yelling)
(glass shattering) (suspenseful music)
(protesters yelling)
(protester yelling)
(shopkeeper yelling)
- You crazy!
(protesters yelling)
Psycho!
You okay, little girl?
- Space for a dresser.
It's not that much bigger.
- Yeah, it is.
It's like twice the size.
Is this apartment pet friendly?
- [Customer] I thought you
said we're gonna talk about that.
- Uh.
- What is there to talk about?
(protesters yelling)
- I got, I gotta go.
Sorry.
- You're leaving?
- No, no, no, no, no. I'm
just going downstairs.
I gotta, uh, uh, grab something.
I- I'll be right back.
- Are you serious?
- Yeah, no, ev-look, everything's
gonna work out, it's gonna be fine.
Okay, just, just don't go anywhere.
All right, don't leave. Don't leave.
(suspenseful music) (door thuds)
(protesters yelling) (dramatic music)
Anna! Anna!
Anna! Anna!
- Dad!
(dramatic music continues)
- [Andy] Anna!
- Dad!
- [Andy] Anna!
(intensifying dramatic music)
- [Anna] Dad!
- Anna!
(Anna thuds)
Oh shit.
- [Nurse] Can you lift your arm for me?
- Is my mom here?
- [Liz] Andy?
- [Andy] She's fine.
- Liz?
- Yeah?
He can listen.
- Anna's fine.
- Okay.
- Just a scratch, no breaks.
She needs a few stitches,
but we'll have her out in a few minutes.
- Thank you.
- Okay.
- Hey, baby girl. How you doing?
- Good.
- You look great to me.
Strong girl. Like your mama.
Hi, Steph. Well, you're
in good hands with Steph.
You want a juice?
- Sure.
- Yeah? Okay.
I'll right back, okay?
(Liz sighs)
- What?
Right, I messed up, okay?
I admit it, I messed up.
But you messed up too.
Yeah! She came to me.
She ran away from you and came to me.
You, you know what kinda kid
runs away from their parents?
Unhappy kids. I mean,
look at her, she's miserable.
- Lower your voice.
- Don't tell me to lower my voice.
She doesn't wanna go to Florida.
I don't want her to go to Florida.
This is a, a decision you're
making for you, and that's selfish.
- Oh, I'm selfish.
- Well, um,
how long have you known this guy?
- It's none of your business, Andy.
- None of my...
I'm her dad.
- Yeah? Since when?
Just because you have a
baby doesn't make you a dad.
- Yes, it does.
What?
(melancholic music)
(traffic whooshing)
(melancholic music continues)
(door clicks)
(door thuds)
Oh, you guys are still here?
- There he is! Andy, nice seeing you here.
- No! No, no, sorry, Jackson.
Sorry, you're, you're a little late.
Yeah, we were just about
to close the deal. Right, guys?
- It's funny, I thought I
had this as an exclusive.
Maybe I got something mixed up.
- Yeah, you got something mixed
up. He's always making, mixing-
- How d'you hear about this?
- He's always mixing stuff up.
- I don't know who's in charge,
but it's okay if I have a guarantor, right?
My dad's paying for us.
- You need a guarantor?
- Andy.
- This apartment doesn't accept guarantors?
- No, no, no, i-it does. It does.
I just, I just need you to fill out
one of these, uh, guarantor forms.
- Andy, how'd you get the key?
- I just have to talk to him
first. Make sure it's okay.
- You haven't talked to him yet?
- Andy?
- Come on, guys.
Guys, what are we doing here? Huh?
I mean, this place is a steal. Look at it!
Look, you said you wanted a
place by the first of the month.
Guess what? It's the first of the month.
- Andy, why don't you just admit
you stole the key from Mike's office?
- Do you have any idea how hard it is
to find a place like this?
I've been all over,
there, there, there's
nothing like this out there.
Why don't we just sign?
Huh? You know what, screw it.
Let's sign! Right?
Let's sign right now! Come on!
- Andy!
- Let's do it.
I'll waive the fee.
- You'll waive the fee?
- Half.
- Andy!
(door rattles)
- If your goal is to upset me, guess what?
I am officially upset.
Patrick!
- No.
- You renting this apartment?
- No, no, no.
- I'm Jed.
- No, no, no!
No, I-I-I was just about to close the deal.
I'm working here!
- As am I, Andy, as am I.
How you doing?
- Hey! Hey!
- Do you need a refrigerator unit?
- [Andy] No. No, no! What are you doing?
- I'm Jed from J&R...
- Sure you are.
- Appliances. Okay, that's disrespectful.
(dramatic music)
- That's mine! It's mine!
- [Jed] Break it up!
(Andy grunting)
(AC thuds)
- It's very unprofessional, Andy!
You've been very unprofessional.
(dog barking)
- [Travis] Bye, Andy.
- [Jed] I think I might be
done doing business with him.
(door thuds)
(Andy panting)
(Andy groans)
(Andy panting)
(Andy chuckling)
- Okay.
(energetic upbeat music)
(car horns honking)
Are you gonna ride for no one at all
Are you gonna cry on demand
Just to get your number called
Oh, baby, I know gone
I know gone, know out of this world
'Cause I've slept in my
bed alone next to my girl
So, do what you want,
just don't go dark on me
Hey
'Cause you run, run, run
Run with the wild
Then you cry on my
shoulder like a little child
Do what you want,
just don't go dark on me
- Hey! Nick, Nick!
(energetic upbeat music continues)
I left my keys at work.
Just don't go dark on me
Oh, just don't go dark on me
- Thank you! Run with the wild
(knuckles rapping)
- [Anna] Dad?
- Can I come in?
- [Anna] What are you doing here?
- I can't hear you.
- [Anna] What are?
(Andy panting)
- Hi.
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have left
you alone. Does it hurt?
- I'm fine. What happened to your showing?
- Uh. It didn't work out.
- What are you gonna do?
- [Liz] Anna!
- I'm packing!
- [Andy] Can I come in?
- She'll hear you.
(Andy sighs)
- I'm really sorry.
(somber music)
- You don't have to apologize.
(Andy sighs)
What?
- You know, if we run,
we could still make it.
It doesn't close till sundown.
(somber music)
Come on! Come on, come on.
We got this. We got this.
Come on!
(crowd softly chattering)
(birds chittering)
I see it. Come on.
What's he doing?
- Oh, wait, wait, we're here.
- Come on.
Wait, wait, don't close the gate.
Don't close the gate, please.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- We're here, come on,
you guys don't close for another hour.
- Yeah, we had to close early.
Some protestors tore down the back gate.
Now, I'm, I'm sorry. We
opens at 9:00 AM tomorrow.
- No, no, no.
- You can buy tickets it's online.
- Please, please, come on!
Come on, we just ran
all the way across town.
- Sorry, I gotta finish locking up.
- Hey, hey, come on!
Listen, I-I promised my
kid I'd take her to the zoo.
Come on. Come on, I promised.
- It's a mess inside. Come tomorrow.
- I can't come tomorrow.
I-I-I can't come tomorrow.
Please, please. Come on.
She's a kid.
- I'm sorry.
- She's a kid!
You're gonna say no to a kid? Please.
Hey, listen, listen.
You know, maybe you do
me a favor, I do you a favor?
Are you, are you looking
for a new apartment?
- An apartment?
- I got a great spot up on,
uh, uh, East 1 11th Street.
- Dad.
- [Stu] I'm sorry. You
guys gotta get outta here.
Come back another day.
- It's okay.
(somber music)
Let's go.
(birds chittering) (seal barking)
(crowd chattering)
(gentle melancholic music)
- [Andy] Look, look. That's heat lightning.
- [Anna] I know what heat lightning is.
- [Andy] You do?
- [Anna] It's pretty.
(gentle melancholic music)
- You don't like mustard?
- No.
- Me either.
- Gross.
(gentle melancholic music)
(insects chirping)
- I still wish I could have gotten us in.
- Well, you promised to
take me and not get me in.
- No, I know, I just, I don't know.
I wanted to give you-
- You did.
(gentle melancholic music)
- You think your mom's gonna let me visit?
- Of course. I'll make sure.
And you know I'm gonna visit you.
- Well, I'll make sure
she gets you a phone.
- I think you need
to get one for yourself first.
(gentle melancholic
music) (insects chirping)
(gentle solemn music)
(gentle solemn music continues)
(gentle solemn music continues)
(car engine rumbling)
(soft melancholic music)
- [Andy] He really did it.
(traffic whooshing)
(car engine rumbling)
(car door rattles)
(dog barking) (car door thuds)
- You told her where we were going?
- It's all right.
Hey, thanks for, uh,
letting me take her.
- Yeah, I didn't realize-
- No, it's okay.
I just didn't think he'd actually do it.
(scoffs)
- [Liz] How you feeling?
- Fine. Dad!
- Don't worry.
There's nothing here that's too valuable.
- Are you gonna be all right?
- Yeah, I don't need any of this.
Really. I'm good.
(somber music)
What, you're worried about me?
There's lots of places I can go.
(keys jangling)
- Dad.
- We got a big day tomorrow. Come on.
- It's okay.
- Come on. Call him from the road.
(somber music)
- Hey! Hey, hey, come on!
Come on.
(somber music)
- What about you?
What are you gonna do?
- I'm great. I'm great.
I'm gonna call you every day
and I might even have to fly you back here
to help me close some listings.
Hey, I have something of yours.
(somber music)
I think we look pretty good.
(Anna chuckles) (Andy chuckles)
(somber music)
- [Anna] I love you.
- [Andy] I love you too.
(Anna sniffles)
(somber music)
(sighs)
All right, you gotta go.
Okay?
(somber music)
Hey, we had fun today.
(cars whooshing)
(gentle upbeat music)
(gentle upbeat music continues)
(gentle upbeat music continues)
Looking at all this strange behavior
Well, I think I understand
why this lonely ghost
Is everything I wanted to know
So I follow it to any hole
It says look at this,
this is just a shadow
What you thought was
faith, that was hollow
Look at you, you've
been chasing shadows
That's why you wake up
(somber music)
(gentle upbeat music)
Holding on to all this strange behavior
Can't believe what I
thought would save me
A pretty girl
If I follow her around the world
When I catch her, she'll say to me
(somber music)
(traffic droning)
(birds chirping)
(traffic whooshing)
(siren wailing)
(car horn honks)
(knuckles rapping) (dog barking)
(knuckles rapping) (door clicks)
- I got an AC.
- D'you trade your kid for it?
- [Andy] Okay, funny.
- Marvin, wake up!
We got an air conditioner!
(upbeat music)
- Dad?
- Yeah?
- I need you to clear
out all this paint stuff.
- [Harold] Ah, no, they're drying
there. Those are my paint brushes.
- I can't fit the AC in here.
- You could put it here.
You could put it here. It'll fit perfectly.
Nice, right here. Huh?
I'm gonna go make some
coffee. You want some?
- Yeah. Don't use that milk.
- [Harold] No, I won't.
(gentle upbeat music) (Andy groans)
- [Andy] You got any spacers or foam?
(gentle upbeat music continues)
- It's gonna be a nice day, huh?
(AC squeaks)
(AC crashes) (alarm blaring)
(gentle upbeat music)
(gentle upbeat music continues)
- Okay, so here's the deal.
Your friend has not been
responding to my phone calls.
I'm running out of options
here, so you work for me now.
- Okay, okay. Hold on, hold on.
Just calm down. I have a job.
I'm a real estate agent. Work at Margolis.
I don't need to be doing business
in the back of a van, okay?
- No, it's simple.
You, uh, you work, you one of
Jed's boys now, you work for me.
I'm gonna get you a shirt.
Can I see that watch.
- I mean, it's my-
- Come on.
- Ow, ow, ow, ow.
- You know, I've been thinking about moving
from appliances into, uh, accessories.
Can you get more of these?
- No, I mean, it was, it was a gift.
- A gift? Oh, thank you.
That's very sweet.
You know, you look like a
man of questionable morals.
This feels good. Uh.
(van engine cranking)
That's it, there we go.
- [Nick] My watch. I...
It's got a chronometer.
(gentle bright upbeat music)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)
(gentle bright upbeat music continues)