Oldboys (2009) Movie Script
Spread out! | You're not statues!
You're out, Vagn!
Go! Haul ass.
Move it, guys! No clusters!
Come on! | - Spread out, guys!
Way to go, Jorgen!
Well done! Damn, you're good.
Cut it out!
Stop it, guys. | Hit the showers.
That's it for today. | Hit the showers!
Balls, over here.
Alright, alright!
Hands off, Svend-Erik.
Still whining about that?
Guys? Hello!
Your attention, please.
There's a minor change.
We meet at 7 a. M. | At the Center Pub.
It's an 11 hour drive, | and we want to be on time. 07.00.
Someone didn't pay for beer. | - We play against the police...
Pigs! | - It's a strong team. Hello!
No partying. Hit the sack early. | - What about sleeping bags?
Honestly! Read the call sheets | or get your wives to do it!
What about passports? | - Not to Sweden. Hell no!
I'm not bringing mine.
Sleeping bags and passports. | - Except me. Skaane is Danish.
Gaevle is not in Skaane. | - I don't give a shit.
Jorgen, good job today. | Let's hear it for Jorgen.
See you... Bye.
Bye, Vagn.
Hello? This is Vagn Bendtsen.
Your call was on my display, so...
No, I didn't recognize the number.
Then I wondered... Hallo?
OSWALD BENDTSEN | Our beloved husband and father.
Hi, Willy. So the bus is off.
We'll beat them, right?
I'll just grab a seat then.
Hi, Willy. | - Hello, Willy.
My condolences. | I'm so sorry that Aase passed on.
Mornin'.
You owe me 500. | - Did you eat breakfast?
Not a drop.
Wow, new shoes. | - Yep.
Did you give them balsam? | - What? No.
Make them wet and wear them in. | Otherwise they'll chafe your feet.
I'm off to Crete this Saturday!
A whole week. | The missus will be thrilled.
Your attention, please!
Hello... Hello...
I have some sad news.
Aase, Willy's life-long partner | passed away after being ill.
She stank like hell. | - She drooled more than she pissed.
She died at sixteen.
Converted to human years | it's quite a...
Wow, that's a lot of years. It's about...
You can't figure it out like that. | It depends on the dog's size.
Erling, please. | - Small dogs live longer.
What about a Cocker Spaniel?
It's true. Seven dog years is bull. | - She was old, alright?
And great training yesterday.
Center field is | really coming together.
Let's give ourselves a hand.
A thousand mile journey | begins with one single Sep.
...step.
What the hell's wrong with you! | Fuck you.
A stout and a slice of layer cake? | That's fifty, even.
There's a discount | on a bigger map of Sweden.
I'm fine, thanks. | - I dreamt about pussy all night.
Here you go.
Salt and pepper is on the table.
They caught him red-handed.
I'm sorry, but I have to... | Not that I think you stole anything.
If you could just...
Not that I think you... | Go through again.
It's that one. It can't...
Wasn't that your mom?
Let me find a towel. | - No, that's alright.
She's totally into you, man.
No, the alarm just went off.
She was pawing you all over.
She is horny as hell. | Check her out.
It's always exiting | to visit another country.
Though our languages are so similar.
It's must be those damn | beef paddies on white -
...or that Danish that made me queasy.
They found all kinds of shit in it.
Our hotel room is | near the main road.
But the missus and I are up way | before the morning traffic starts.
Bakers are pigs. I've heard stories | about them crapping in the dough.
We have to pull over for gas, Willy.
What the...
Piece of shit!
Fork over everything from the register!
Now, damn it!
Hello there!
Hey...
Where's the beer?
Hey, you... | Do you have beer? Bear?
Do you have beer? | - Look! Danish lager.
Excellent... No, 3.5%.
Do you have real beer? | Strong beer?
Danish? We're Danish.
Damn hustler!
Excuse me? Did you see a bus? | - It drove off.
Did it drive off?
They'll be back soon. | - Are you Danish?
Then why did you speak Swedish?
You started! | - No, no, I'm Danish.
Give them a call. | - I can't remember their numbers.
It's closing time, so...
It's only 9.30 in the morning. | - Yeah, but...
It's a... A night station.
We are closing now.
Bye then.
Hey, you!
I have to get to that bus.
We have a soccer game tomorrow. | - Sorry, I'm busy.
My money and things are on that bus. | They can't make it without me.
I'll pay you. | - Get in.
Shut up and get in! | - 300 Swedish.
What the fuck! | We bought exactly the same.
You even got a fucking magazine.
We bought the same. Six rum cakes, | two packs of smokes -
...six Swedish beers | that taste like piss. 462 kroner.
We've been fucked in the ass.
I'm sick of those damn foreigners. | - Do me a favor, Erling.
Shut the fuck up! | - But we bought the same shit.
We are abroad. We have to adapt. | Got it?
That's beside the point. | - Zip it!
This is really nice of you.
We have a game up in Gaevle.
We have this annual soccer roadtrip.
It's usually a blast... | - I have to park the car.
It's a loaner. My car is nearby.
Are you dropping me off? | You promised to take me to the bus.
Relax! I'll take you to your bus. | - Hang on! I'm changing shoes.
Stay put! I'll be back for you. | - Why can't I come?
Adios, you old fart.
All set?
Hey! Stop that.
Rise and shine!
Here... | You need a sugar kick.
You banged your head real bad.
What time is it? | - We better hurry to catch the bus.
Where are we? | - In Sweden. You hit your head.
And your buddies forgot you. | - They didn't forget.
Can I borrow your phone? I'll pay you.
Make it short.
It's the answering machine.
Hi, mom. I need a number in a hurry. | I'll call you back. Take care.
You sure you didn't pass the bus? | I need to pee. Can you pull over?
Piss in this.
You want me to pee in a bottle? | - You have to piss, don't you?
Not in that. | - When you gotta go, you gotta go.
I don't really feel like it.
It's a first, but... what the heck.
No, they're my best buddies. | We've played soccer forever.
Terrific buddies. | - My name i Vagn Bendtsen.
John Lun... Wayne. | - John Wayne?
Strom. | - John Waynestrom.
I'm just plain Bendtsen. | No relation.
To who? | - The politician.
Not as far as I know.
Perhaps the relatives in the sticks.
There's your bus. | - Yes, yes!
I'll just get you the money. | - Forget it.
Thanks for the ride. | - Take that bottle with you.
Bye-bye.
And good luck!
Olaf Palme stubbornly insisted | that the island was Swedish.
Sorry about the stench.
One of the kids | must have pissed himself.
My dad was the head | of the weather station.
But he's retired now.
I forgot my soccer shoes.
What? | - I forgot my soccer shoes.
Last year we played against | the fish factory in Esbjerg.
We were ahead 2-0 | but lost by 3-2-
...because we got | quite drunk the night before.
Then a year and a half ago | we got our new coach, Henrik B.
You think | I could borrow your phone?
I'll pay you.
If you would kindly drop me off here.
Check this out. It's genius.
I bought it on the ferry. | There's a light here...
...and a bottle opener | at the other end.
It's actually a simple construction.
The manufacturer made | a tight sheath around the tool.
One for 12, two for 20. | I bought two for 20.
You're... Hogging the space.
Hurry up! Fork everything over!
Come on, Erling. | - You take forever too.
All in. 14 kroner. | - I'm out.
Three rather nice ladies.
Three pairs. One, two, three.
There's no such thing as three pairs! | - Fuck you, Svend-Erik.
There's three pairs. | - You can only use five cards!
You can't have three pairs! | What are you doing?
56 kroner. | Now you only owe me 444.
Someone must know the rules!
Vagn! Vagn! Vagn?
Hi, John. I forgot my shoes. | You can drop me off here.
What the fuck? You're so dead! | Did you follow me?
No, I forgot my shoes. Don't hit me.
Stop it... Stop!
Just drop me off here, thanks. | - No fucking way!
You hit me. Drop me off, please. | - You're staying!
I wasn't aware of your profession. | Just let me go.
No, can do! You just made | yourself a potential witness!
You know what we do | to guys like you, rat?
Are you going to kill me?
That's an excellent idea.
Get out!
No.
Get out now! You rat!
No, no... | - Open up!
I'm not a rat or a thief.
Why would I rat on you? | - Get out! Open the door!
What are you doing? | What the hell?
Oh no, you don't! | - Don't kill me. I have a game.
Don't do it, Vagn!
Stop the car! Stop the car!
Go away. I'm going now.
I'm speeding up, John.
Stop the car! | - Don't kill me.
Stop, damn it! | - Only on one condition!
Two conditions, John.
No more stick-ups! | - Fine.
And it's all the way to the bus. | - I always keep up my end.
And if you rat me out, | I'll make sure you never...
You have my word. Once we reach | the bus I forget about you forever.
I don't feel so good...
Maybe you got a concussion | when you banged your head.
Ew, gross! All over your shoes.
Those are not coming in my car. | - But they're my favorite.
There's puke all over.
It's the answering machine. The | gas station is closed due to a robbery.
Are you sure it's the right number? | - You think Vagn held it up?
Funny we haven't seen him since. | - We forgot him.
Vagn is out there alone somewhere. | We need to turn the bus around.
Vagn is a grown man. | He will get there.
I wouldn't file | a missing person's report.
All Swedish cops are dirty bastards.
Prepare for a dirty game tomorrow.
Why didn't he call us?
Do you know my number by heart? | How about Erling's?
Of course not. We're neighbors.
Fix that and get it turned on. | Maybe he called his phone.
I saw him steal on the ferry. | - Go to the back and be quiet.
Shouldn't we vote on it? | - Yes!
Who is in favor of...
I demand it be an anonymous vote. | My vote is my business.
Who's for an anonymous vote? | - No one gives a shit!
Who's for going to Western World?
Who's talking about Western World?
So what do you do? | - I'm a janitor.
Where? | - Herlev Junior High.
Any fun?
I'm really a book binder.
This is just temporary.
How long have you played soccer? | - Since I was a kid.
Six or seven years old.
Are you married?
Why are you asking? | Why are you asking me all this?
I'm just making conversation.
No, you're giving me the third degree.
I just asked if you were married! | - I'm not obliged to tell you.
Then don't!
It's just a bit odd to be | interrogated by a violent crook.
I'm not violent! | Shut it, or I'll smack you!
Always with the hitting.
You can ask me anything. | - I don't want to play that game.
I don't buy that.
You seem like the curious type. | And I know people.
Ask me something.
What are you doing in Sweden?
You don't want to know. | - There you go.
Seriously. | Ask me something else.
I want to know why someone | like you is driving me around.
Because we made a deal | and I keep up my end.
What are you doing in Sweden? | There are gas stations in Denmark too.
I can't go back. | - Why not? Why are you here?
Because I am exiled!
What?
I owe some guys money.
Some gangbangers. | - You're right.
I can't go back without the dough. | - Please stop.
A good friend screwed me over. | - I really don't want to hear this.
I'll fuck him up. | - My ears are ringing.
If I show my face in Copenhagen | without the cash... They'll kill me.
Can't hear you... What?
What are they going to do? | - The end.
What kind of people do that? | - Game over!
He is eh... Fifty-eight... Sixty...
Five... Sixty... | There abouts.
If he what?
Did he seem depressed?
Not really.
No, he didn't. Thanks. Bye-bye.
Listen up! We're not going back. | The gas station is closed.
Vagn is either on his way to us | or on his way home.
So far the Swedish police will | inform us of any development.
Let's make the most of it.
Vagn won't come if he's the robber.
If you must know... | I'm not married.
No wonder. You look like shit. | - Is it that bad?
No...
It's worse.
Goal minus Doubt equals Reality.
Something I read the other day.
You read books? | - Sure, I've read 106 books.
Mostly about spiritual stuff | and personal growth.
I think everything | has a deeper meaning.
Your buddies forgot you... | - They didn't forget.
Yeah, whatever. | There's a deeper meaning. For sure.
Have you read | "The Celestine Prophecy"?
Great book! It's about a man who | goes on a journey of the senses.
He journeys into the soul while on his | travels and discovers some writings.
During this journey... | No, you have to read it.
They didn't forget me. | - I can't believe you haven't read it.
Have you read Kierkegaard?
I tried... But I don't get it.
I think I've seen one of his movies.
I'll have the same. | Mackerel and mayo on top.
Hi, honey. | It's going just fine.
Did you by any chance talk to Vagn?
We forgot him. | Yes, I know it's bad.
The interesting thing about coaching | is that it focusses entirely on you.
The enneagram technique | divides you into numbers.
I'll bet you're a four.
The romantic type.
Is that good? | - It's not about good or bad...
No, it's not. | I'm an eight.
The challenger.
Too tight? | - No... I'll pay you later.
They're a gift. We help each other.
Anyone can be up shit creek, | just like you were.
That's what friends are for.
We better... | - What's your favorite movie?
Mine is "Scent of a Woman"... | with that blind guy.
That girl is really hot. | I'd fuck her any day.
Let's get moving.
I really like Jane Seymour.
The Danes couldn't beat Brazil 4-0. | - What are you talking about?
DFA paid 100 grand for every ball | the Brazilians let pass.
Bullshit! | - It's a known fact. 400 grand, easy.
Niller from DFA ran off with the cash.
They never heard from him. | Rumors have it he went to Spain.
You can't live off 400.000 | the rest of your life.
In Crete you get a three course meal | with Retzina for less than a hundred.
That's a bargain.
Goddamn it!
What the fuck, Willy?
Jesus Christ! | - Look, it's Aase.
Willy, did you bring dead Aase? | - That's disgusting, Willy!
Cut it out. | - No way. That's too creepy.
Dogs aren't allowed in Sweden.
Shut your trap, Erling! | - No.
You can't bring dogs and meat. | It's a federal crime.
They have to be quarantined. | - Exactly!
Okay, guys. Willy is really sorry.
He didn't have time | to bury Aase -
...and he didn't have the heart | to leave her at home.
We can't drive around | with a dead dog.
Let's just bury the bitch in a ditch.
Let's vote on it. An anonymous vote.
Fine! Who is for it? | - Me.
For what? | You can't ask that way!
Listen! Why can't we vote...
Bye-bye.
Can I borrow your phone again? | I'll pay you.
I can't afford that, Frank! | - She's Danish.
The phone... I'll pay you.
Shut up about the money.
Try to get hold of Kirsten. | She's married to Erling.
Inge's son. | Mom, the kid with the mucus.
The movies? What did you see?
Okay. Put your dad on again.
She knows Vivi | who's married to Henrik B.
Yes... Take care.
Yes, I left some flowers this morning.
I saw you did too. | It looked really nice.
I miss him too. | He was a good man.
I have to go. Talk to you soon.
My mom.
Who died? | - No one.
My dad. But that's many years ago. | He died today.
Do you want to talk about it? | - No, no...
You know I'm a good listener, right? | - No, not really.
Traumatic experiences | can block your entire system.
It's 45 years ago... | - Fries with barnaise?
The fish is on its way.
He ordered tartar sauce. | - Sorry, we don't have that.
That's alright.
Your job doesn't require brains.
The least you could do | is remember what people order!
My friend wants tartar sauce | with his fries, you moron!
It's not okay. | - It's fine. I like the fries.
It's not okay. You need to | put your foot down, Vagn.
Imagine the world populated | by guys like him.
Put your foot down. Sometimes you | gotta say: "Hey, I want tartar sauce. "
Otherwise you'll be very unhappy.
Put your foot down. Alright?
You should eat healthier too.
It all has to do with | your childhood. You know?
You can just keep on going, huh? | - What do you mean?
You seem very persistent.
Just curious. | I think I can help you.
It builds up inside your body.
I've helped a lot of buddies inside, | just by listening.
You'll feel better afterwards. | - That's nice, but I don't need help.
That's what you say now.
In a couple of hours we split up. | We'll never see each other again.
Alright!
He died 45 years ago today.
I had just had my communion.
On Sundays we played soccer | at the local soccer field from 10-12.
My dad was in charge of the field.
He mowed the lawn | and chalked the lines before a game.
I used to help him. | Afterwards we played soccer.
Just him and me.
And then...
He passes the ball to me -
...and I'm running toward the goal | where he is standing...
Suddenly he was on the ground.
He was foaming around the mouth. | I didn't know what to do, so I...
I sat down beside him | and said: "I'm right here. "
I don't know how long I sat there. | It feels like days.
Some adults came and | the ambulance drove off with him.
I was in shock for weeks.
That image kept haunting me.
I didn't attend his funeral, either. | I just couldn't...
I know I should have been there.
That's something | I'll never forgive myself...
...for not being there.
What's going on? | - That's father Ekdahl.
We're going to a funeral. | - Who died?
Your dad. | - I don't want to. No, you're nuts.
Parting with Oswald Bendtsen -
...doesn't mean good-bye forever.
As it's written in | the Book of John, chapter 14:
"In my Father's house | are many mansions -
...and where I go, you know the way. "
No one wants to end | their days by saying:
"If I had my life over | I would climb more mountains -
...and swim more rivers, | take more chances -
I would have more troubles, | but fewer imaginary ones. "
The day is our Lord's creation.
Let us find joy in it. | Every day is a gift.
Seize the day and squeeze every | little drop of joy and love from it.
This is life.
Ashes to ashes, | dust to dust...
...Jesus Christ, our Savior -
will awaken you | on Judgment Day.
Amen.
Get off me, you sick fuck!
Hey! Stop it!
Okay, party's ov...
Way to go, Vagn.
We can't stay. We have to leave.
Bastard!
I need my bag. | - Vagn! Grab her bag.
Her bag!
I have to pick up my son.
What the fuck... | I just want to get my son.
Lone-ly lady fourty-one
cute and chubby, lots of fun
People aren't up for that.
We're sailing up the river...
Listen to me! | It's not the time nor place for singing.
It's not the words | you are saying
it's more the lying in itself
So you have a son? | - Yes. Patrick.
How old is he? | - Five.
Five! That's a good age. | - You have kids?
Not as far as I know. | Or no, I dont. Do you?
Apart from Patrick? | - No.
You have to be ready for kids. | - Yeah.
That's why I never had any.
Or maybe I didn't have time | or met the right person.
So you're married | or what do you do for a living?
I was married to Patrick's dad.
He owns the club I work at. | I'm a bartender.
Bartender! Wow, that's cool. | - I hate it.
He moved to Uppsala with a Polish girl | and they get my son every six weeks.
Great, right?
Where did you guys meet?
We met... His friends forgot him and | they have a soccer game tomorrow.
I felt sorry for him, | so I offered him a ride.
So that's what I'm doing. | - Okay.
So what do you do? | - Me?
I'll probably study psychology or...
Maybe coaching. Have you | read "The Celestine Prophecy"?
It's about a man's journey... | - I've read it.
Really? Have you read it? | Shut up!
Vagn! Vagn!
Jeanne has read | "The Celestine Prophecy"!
Are you a virgin?
I mean Virgo. | You're a lot like a Virgo.
Are you now an astrologer too? | - No, but it holds some interest.
What am I then? I'm not a Virgo.
Then I bet you're a Libra. | - Are you for real?
You're guessing. I'm a Taurus. | - Taurus is controlled by Venus.
A real fighter, but she's also lazy.
Incredibly stubborn, | but admits she's not always right.
Sometimes she's an introvert, but | she's mostly happy and outgoing.
That's true for everyone. | It might as well be Hitler.
That's so Taurus! | - I know a lot about...
Hitler was an Aries. | - Are Aries like Hitler then?
My son is an Aries. | Are you telling me, he's like Hitler?
All Aries are not like Hitler! | Some are.
All this talk about Hitler. | - For real?
I'm proud of my interest | in spirituality and...
What's so funny? | What's so funny?
A lot of my friends | have been grateful for my help.
I stood by them 100%. Right, Vagn? | - Sure, sure.
See? Friends who call me to talk.
John here.
Who?
Hang on a minute.
Vagn, it's your mother. | - She has my coach's number.
Are you that far, already?
Henrik, a lot has happened. | I'll get there on my own.
I'll drive you.
Just give me the address. | I'll get there.
Yeah, I'll hold.
She's unique. | - No, she's a bitch.
She's nuts about you. | - No, she hates me.
She thinks you're sweet. | She looking again.
Be yourself. Don't be a smart-ass. | - Me? She's such a show off.
Drop all that talk about books. | It just seems...
Yes, I'm here. | Yes, that's out of the way.
I'll drive you all the way.
Just give me the address...
I'd forgotten how hungry I was.
Fine, just give me the address. | I have to find a pen.
You just stay here and...
Thunderbird.
From '65. | The hind lights have grits.
My dad told me | I was made in one of them.
My favorite is a Ford Mustang.
A late '65. | - 4,7 liter.
289.
Straight-6 motor. | - V8.
Pony interior. | - A round speedometer.
No, that's the '66.
You're such a pain in the ass.
I know.
It usually takes longer | before people tell me.
Alright... That's a deal.
You'll really drive me all the way? | - I always keep up my end.
Henrik, I'll get there on my own.
Oh, Henrik...
How long did it take? | Before you noticed I was gone?
Oh... Alright then. Bye.
They didn't forget. It was a mistake. | They were probably worried.
Shut up, John. | Of course they forgot.
Why do I have to sleep down there?
Because I was here first. | Too bad, Erling.
Bullshit. Why couldn't I choose?
I was here first!
You want some bread | to go with that whine?
Nice tattoo. | What does it say?
Reebok, rebook?
No, it says Rebel. It's old. | - Cool.
I have one too. Check this out.
It hurt like hell.
Check this out.
Nicole Kidman stayed there.
Nice place, right?
Wait, wait... Hold that. | - I am!
There! | - Start her up.
Hello. | - Hi.
What happened here? | - We just...
The car stalled.
Who's the owner? | - It's my... Car.
No, your driver's license!
Would you grab my license | in the glove compartment?
Thanks. Here you go.
What's in the bag?
What's in the bag? | - It's...
It's mine!
It's my bag. It's soccer gear. | I'm a goalie.
The players in the bus left me behind.
So my friend John here -
...is helping me get to my bus.
We have a game in Gaevle tomorrow.
Against the police. | - They stink!
Those old bastards.
That guy, Stig. A real boozer. | And a dirty player.
Alright, I'll pass it on.
Cool... Soccer.
I can't afford that. | - No worries.
You prefer something else? | - No, it's fantastic.
A lot better than staying | with Frank and Nurlana.
We could find something smaller. | Maybe a hostel?
We're not staying at a hostel.
Nicole Kidman stayed here.
What?
There's puke on your shirt.
You figure it out! | It's just four days.
Did you ever stop to think | he might have missed you?
You never did. | You never asked me that either.
Good-bye, Frank.
The jerk never once | asked me how I was.
Fuck him.
Oh... it's John's.
There's a party in the restaurant. | You wanna check it out?
What's so funny? | Tell me. What is it?
It's your T-shirt on me. | - Hilarious.
That's a pull-out couch. For you. | - You too.
Who's that Nico Kritman-guy?
Nicole Kidman! | Don't you know her?
I'd do her... | Back to the sleeping arrangements.
I think it's a private party.
Cheers. Welcome.
Just a word...
Let me have your attention.
We have a long day ahead of us | tomorrow, so lights out at eleven.
By eleven-thirty I want quiet.
Who took my brewski?
And keep the beer at a minimum.
Good, that's agreed!
Sleep tight, guys!
I don't dance. I don't want to.
Let's change partners.
Thanks. | - You're welcome.
You and John... | You look good together.
He's a good kid.
He's quite a hand-full, | but a good kid.
How about you, Vagn? | Are you married?
No, no, I'm single.
I don't think I've met the one. | - I think you've met her often.
I'm a good person.
I just have to believe in myself | and express my feelings.
Then I can get anyone.
Have you never been in love? | - Sure, I have.
When I was 25. | Her name was Vivi.
She was special. She was a hippie.
We called her Hippie Vivi.
She was incredibly pretty. | We were inseparable.
She was all I cared about. | You know?
I even proposed to her | on one knee and all.
What happened?
She... Left me.
Have you never been in love since? | - No. Vivi was one in a million.
"That Love is all there is, | is all we know of love. "
Missy Elliott.
John, you have to tell Jeanne | about your activities.
Yeah, sure. That's the plan.
...two, one, go!
25 seconds!
Vagn, it's for you.
Hello? Oh, Henrik...
Yes, it is a bad time. I'm dancing.
Just a second...
None of your damn business!
Sure I'm drunk. | I'm been on the team for 24 years.
In all those years | no one ever asked me how I was.
And I'll be at the game | in my own damn time.
Good-bye!
Well, I'll be...
Jeanne? Jeanne...
I have to tell you something. | - What?
It's important that I say this. | - What?
Is it me? | - No, no. You're fantastic.
Fuck it. It can wait.
Gunilla?
Thank you.
What... Hi, Vagn. | - Hi. Ready to go?
You're looking sharp.
So you banged the chef, huh?
Can I borrow your phone? | - She wasn't half bad.
Except for the bald spot, but... | - All I remember is we danced.
Then we went to her room to | get cigarettes.
Suddenly she stripped and | they were swinging back and forth.
I couldn't get it up last night. | - What?
I couldn't get it up. | - So you...
No, I couldn't. It was... | - It happens.
I feel awful.
I think I'm in love. | It's like walking on air.
Good party last night. | Where'd you go? We waited for you.
Should we get going?
You smell deep-fried.
Mornin', guys! Sleep well?
I can't sleep in this shit. | My back is out. I can't play today.
Always an excuse for sitting one out.
I had an irritable bowel last year. | - You still are.
Watch the tone. I understand | if you're nervous before the game.
At least hold off until tonight!
Guys, I have a couple of messages.
The game has been postponed.
The police forgot to book the field. | - Those pigs!
Thanks, Jorgen. | So we'll play this afternoon instead.
Get your gear on! | We're ready in a minute.
Vagn called. He's on his way.
He's not sure he'll be here in time.
But since the game is this afternoon -
...maybe it's a gift from above | that he's late.
Guys! Get you gear on! | See you in five!
Damn it, Bitten.
She's got her head up her ass.
I'm not wearing this. No fucking way.
Has anyone seen my underwear?
So Morten Olsen mastered | the off-side play.
Off-side is very tricky.
You're not off-side on your own half | or if you're in line -
with the opposing team's second | to last player or the last player.
Most likely the goalie. Gravity is | important, because the lower...
Let it ring!
Shit...
Start her up!
He wasn't off-side after all. | They lost 3-1.
The referee always gets balled out. | He makes split decisions.
The off-side rule is impossible -
...because the assistant referee | can't be in two places at once...
Stop it! | Don't grope me. Stop the car!
I just... | - Forget it, creep. Stop the car!
What the hell is up with you?
Shut your trap. Leave me alone.
Go after her, John.
Jeanne!
Jeanne, get in the car.
I'm sorry. | - Sorry?
You're the biggest psycho I ever met.
I'm through with guys like you. | And you too!
Leave Vagn out of this. | - Just stay away, John.
Jeanne, damn it... what's up? | - You know what!
I was this close to falling for you. | This close.
Fuck you.
Fuck you too!
Look at your bag.
You didn't tell her. | - No, I never did.
I was just about to, when... | - You have to stop that shit.
You think living like this is free? | Everything costs money!
You've got to quit, John.
Come on. Follow her.
Looking good.
That's the Swedes. Hey-hey.
Hey. Heysan.
They look way younger than us.
I'd like a chat with their coach.
She was this close to falling for you. | - I heard.
She also told me to fuck off. | - Yes, and with good reason.
Are you telling me to fuck off?
You can't live like that in the long run. | No one can.
Just find the truck.
About that debt... | How much do you owe those guys?
120.000. | It was actually only 26.000.
The rest is interest.
Maybe I can help. | I put a little aside...
Stop it!
Don't you get it! I'm not to be trusted.
I can't do anything right! | - John...
I was never good at anything.
John, it... | - I just want to go home.
Don't start crying.
It's not true. You...
Everything I touch goes to shit. | I'll never find the truck.
But you're the reason I'm here now.
You deserve better than me, Vagn.
It's not true.
You're a good sport. | - You too.
You know what?
We're going to the game, | and you're gonna win it.
For your dad! Fuck everything else. | - There it is!
Hi, Sweetie!
Cute kid, huh?
It's now or never.
What if she turns me down? | - Then you proved you're a fighter.
Some candy?
Come on. It's totally whacked.
What did you say?
I said I was sorry and would have | told her. She asked me to leave.
What a stupid idea! | Thanks a lot, Vagn!
What does she want from me? | Do I have to turn myself in?
That might be a good idea. | - What?
That you turned yourself in. | - Are you on crack?
You can't live like this forever. | - Shut it, Vagn.
Would you rather lose | a great girl like her?
A chance like this comes maybe | twice in a lifetime. Vivi and I met...
Put a sock in it, you old fuck!
What the hell do you know?
It's your fault I made an ass of myself. | You haven't had a girl in 40 years.
What the hell do you know? | Fucking stooge!
No wonder your friends forgot you.
And soccer! You're too old | and weak to play sports!
Why don't you piss out of this car and | find your loser friends on your own?
Get out! Go!
What are you doing here? | - I just came to say good-bye.
Where's John? | - He drove off. He's not coming back.
I can't be with someone who... | - I understand, but...
But John is really a good kid.
I'm sure he would | have told you in time.
But he didn't.
Cute kid you got there.
Anyway, good-bye. | - I'm sorry you missed your game.
Well, there's still 100 kilometers.
That's 10 Swedish miles...
...or English... well...
It was nice to meet you. | - Wait, Vagn.
Hi, Nurlana. Is Frank here?
Frank? Frank!
My back aches. | - He has a medical certificate.
I want you on that field! | Get undressed, now.
It's time to get a move on.
First guy who says anything! | - We finally got a cheerleader.
Warm up, people! | Shut up, Erling!
Warm up, guys! | Send the balls over here.
How is that still funny?
Don't fear their counter attack. | We're using the 1-2-3 line up.
We push them from the get-go. | Be alert and work with each other.
Our defense is too weak for that. | - Among other things.
Who let four goals go in last time? | - I can't take you seriously.
Shouldn't I play a quick... | - Nope.
Not now!
I don't want our national hymn | in the middle of my speech.
Sit down!
Would you please listen? | Stop interrupting!
Shut up, Erling! Shut up!
We're using the 1-2-3 line up!
So we push them... | - Look, it's Vagn!
Who is she? | - Who's that gal?
Hi, Vagn. I'm glad you came.
Hi, Vagn. Vagn is back!
That's Jeanne and Patrick.
Better late than never. | - We missed you.
Old buddy.
I'm really, really, really sorry.
It's all my fault. Come here.
How are you doing? | - I'm fine.
You can change in the bus.
Let's hear it for Vagn. He's back.
Move it, guys.
Good, Preben.
Alright!
Swedish prick!
For fuck's sake!
Good, Svend-Erik!
Stay with the ball, guys!
Hi...
Hi...
You forgot your shoes in the car?
Just leave them there.
I felt I should drop them off.
Are they all cops?
Well done, Vagn!
I wanted to see you play | and I've heard so much -
...and we made that deal...
Damn, that's a lot of cops. | - Look alive, Erling!
I'm way alive, asshole!
Vagn... I'm real sorry, man.
I had no right interfering...
I butted in, gave you some advice, | and I'm sorry about that.
I shouldn't have. | - Sure, you should.
That's what friends are for. | They help each other out.
You don't leave them hanging | with big choices to make.
You look out for each other, right? | - Jeanne is here.
Yeah, I know.
Counter attack!
Go, Manne!
Beautiful, Vagn!
Free kick!
To the left...
Hi. I robbed three gas stations...
Take it easy, man!
Stop that!
Hey!
What's going on?
What the fuck!
I have to go to Crete on Saturday!
Dear John. I hope they are | treating you alright in there.
Although you were against it | I've paid off most of your debt.
My dad's coin collection turned out | to be worth more that I thought.
It was just lying around anyway | and kind of nice to get rid of.
And you don't have a car anymore.
I used the money in the bag | as payment.
It took a bit longer than expected, | but now it's done.
Thanks for the books.
We weren't thinking | about the same Kierkegaard.
But who cares?
It made me proud to hear that | you help the other convicts to vent.
Good for you.
And I've met someone.
I don't think I've told you.
Her name is Bente.
It's as if we've known each other | a hundred years. You know?
Jeanne says hi. I take Patrick to | soccer practice every Wednesday.
She still thinks about you.
I have to go. | We have to leave for a game.
Don't make any trouble in there. | Take care, until I see you again.
Your friend, Vagn.
You're out, Vagn!
Go! Haul ass.
Move it, guys! No clusters!
Come on! | - Spread out, guys!
Way to go, Jorgen!
Well done! Damn, you're good.
Cut it out!
Stop it, guys. | Hit the showers.
That's it for today. | Hit the showers!
Balls, over here.
Alright, alright!
Hands off, Svend-Erik.
Still whining about that?
Guys? Hello!
Your attention, please.
There's a minor change.
We meet at 7 a. M. | At the Center Pub.
It's an 11 hour drive, | and we want to be on time. 07.00.
Someone didn't pay for beer. | - We play against the police...
Pigs! | - It's a strong team. Hello!
No partying. Hit the sack early. | - What about sleeping bags?
Honestly! Read the call sheets | or get your wives to do it!
What about passports? | - Not to Sweden. Hell no!
I'm not bringing mine.
Sleeping bags and passports. | - Except me. Skaane is Danish.
Gaevle is not in Skaane. | - I don't give a shit.
Jorgen, good job today. | Let's hear it for Jorgen.
See you... Bye.
Bye, Vagn.
Hello? This is Vagn Bendtsen.
Your call was on my display, so...
No, I didn't recognize the number.
Then I wondered... Hallo?
OSWALD BENDTSEN | Our beloved husband and father.
Hi, Willy. So the bus is off.
We'll beat them, right?
I'll just grab a seat then.
Hi, Willy. | - Hello, Willy.
My condolences. | I'm so sorry that Aase passed on.
Mornin'.
You owe me 500. | - Did you eat breakfast?
Not a drop.
Wow, new shoes. | - Yep.
Did you give them balsam? | - What? No.
Make them wet and wear them in. | Otherwise they'll chafe your feet.
I'm off to Crete this Saturday!
A whole week. | The missus will be thrilled.
Your attention, please!
Hello... Hello...
I have some sad news.
Aase, Willy's life-long partner | passed away after being ill.
She stank like hell. | - She drooled more than she pissed.
She died at sixteen.
Converted to human years | it's quite a...
Wow, that's a lot of years. It's about...
You can't figure it out like that. | It depends on the dog's size.
Erling, please. | - Small dogs live longer.
What about a Cocker Spaniel?
It's true. Seven dog years is bull. | - She was old, alright?
And great training yesterday.
Center field is | really coming together.
Let's give ourselves a hand.
A thousand mile journey | begins with one single Sep.
...step.
What the hell's wrong with you! | Fuck you.
A stout and a slice of layer cake? | That's fifty, even.
There's a discount | on a bigger map of Sweden.
I'm fine, thanks. | - I dreamt about pussy all night.
Here you go.
Salt and pepper is on the table.
They caught him red-handed.
I'm sorry, but I have to... | Not that I think you stole anything.
If you could just...
Not that I think you... | Go through again.
It's that one. It can't...
Wasn't that your mom?
Let me find a towel. | - No, that's alright.
She's totally into you, man.
No, the alarm just went off.
She was pawing you all over.
She is horny as hell. | Check her out.
It's always exiting | to visit another country.
Though our languages are so similar.
It's must be those damn | beef paddies on white -
...or that Danish that made me queasy.
They found all kinds of shit in it.
Our hotel room is | near the main road.
But the missus and I are up way | before the morning traffic starts.
Bakers are pigs. I've heard stories | about them crapping in the dough.
We have to pull over for gas, Willy.
What the...
Piece of shit!
Fork over everything from the register!
Now, damn it!
Hello there!
Hey...
Where's the beer?
Hey, you... | Do you have beer? Bear?
Do you have beer? | - Look! Danish lager.
Excellent... No, 3.5%.
Do you have real beer? | Strong beer?
Danish? We're Danish.
Damn hustler!
Excuse me? Did you see a bus? | - It drove off.
Did it drive off?
They'll be back soon. | - Are you Danish?
Then why did you speak Swedish?
You started! | - No, no, I'm Danish.
Give them a call. | - I can't remember their numbers.
It's closing time, so...
It's only 9.30 in the morning. | - Yeah, but...
It's a... A night station.
We are closing now.
Bye then.
Hey, you!
I have to get to that bus.
We have a soccer game tomorrow. | - Sorry, I'm busy.
My money and things are on that bus. | They can't make it without me.
I'll pay you. | - Get in.
Shut up and get in! | - 300 Swedish.
What the fuck! | We bought exactly the same.
You even got a fucking magazine.
We bought the same. Six rum cakes, | two packs of smokes -
...six Swedish beers | that taste like piss. 462 kroner.
We've been fucked in the ass.
I'm sick of those damn foreigners. | - Do me a favor, Erling.
Shut the fuck up! | - But we bought the same shit.
We are abroad. We have to adapt. | Got it?
That's beside the point. | - Zip it!
This is really nice of you.
We have a game up in Gaevle.
We have this annual soccer roadtrip.
It's usually a blast... | - I have to park the car.
It's a loaner. My car is nearby.
Are you dropping me off? | You promised to take me to the bus.
Relax! I'll take you to your bus. | - Hang on! I'm changing shoes.
Stay put! I'll be back for you. | - Why can't I come?
Adios, you old fart.
All set?
Hey! Stop that.
Rise and shine!
Here... | You need a sugar kick.
You banged your head real bad.
What time is it? | - We better hurry to catch the bus.
Where are we? | - In Sweden. You hit your head.
And your buddies forgot you. | - They didn't forget.
Can I borrow your phone? I'll pay you.
Make it short.
It's the answering machine.
Hi, mom. I need a number in a hurry. | I'll call you back. Take care.
You sure you didn't pass the bus? | I need to pee. Can you pull over?
Piss in this.
You want me to pee in a bottle? | - You have to piss, don't you?
Not in that. | - When you gotta go, you gotta go.
I don't really feel like it.
It's a first, but... what the heck.
No, they're my best buddies. | We've played soccer forever.
Terrific buddies. | - My name i Vagn Bendtsen.
John Lun... Wayne. | - John Wayne?
Strom. | - John Waynestrom.
I'm just plain Bendtsen. | No relation.
To who? | - The politician.
Not as far as I know.
Perhaps the relatives in the sticks.
There's your bus. | - Yes, yes!
I'll just get you the money. | - Forget it.
Thanks for the ride. | - Take that bottle with you.
Bye-bye.
And good luck!
Olaf Palme stubbornly insisted | that the island was Swedish.
Sorry about the stench.
One of the kids | must have pissed himself.
My dad was the head | of the weather station.
But he's retired now.
I forgot my soccer shoes.
What? | - I forgot my soccer shoes.
Last year we played against | the fish factory in Esbjerg.
We were ahead 2-0 | but lost by 3-2-
...because we got | quite drunk the night before.
Then a year and a half ago | we got our new coach, Henrik B.
You think | I could borrow your phone?
I'll pay you.
If you would kindly drop me off here.
Check this out. It's genius.
I bought it on the ferry. | There's a light here...
...and a bottle opener | at the other end.
It's actually a simple construction.
The manufacturer made | a tight sheath around the tool.
One for 12, two for 20. | I bought two for 20.
You're... Hogging the space.
Hurry up! Fork everything over!
Come on, Erling. | - You take forever too.
All in. 14 kroner. | - I'm out.
Three rather nice ladies.
Three pairs. One, two, three.
There's no such thing as three pairs! | - Fuck you, Svend-Erik.
There's three pairs. | - You can only use five cards!
You can't have three pairs! | What are you doing?
56 kroner. | Now you only owe me 444.
Someone must know the rules!
Vagn! Vagn! Vagn?
Hi, John. I forgot my shoes. | You can drop me off here.
What the fuck? You're so dead! | Did you follow me?
No, I forgot my shoes. Don't hit me.
Stop it... Stop!
Just drop me off here, thanks. | - No fucking way!
You hit me. Drop me off, please. | - You're staying!
I wasn't aware of your profession. | Just let me go.
No, can do! You just made | yourself a potential witness!
You know what we do | to guys like you, rat?
Are you going to kill me?
That's an excellent idea.
Get out!
No.
Get out now! You rat!
No, no... | - Open up!
I'm not a rat or a thief.
Why would I rat on you? | - Get out! Open the door!
What are you doing? | What the hell?
Oh no, you don't! | - Don't kill me. I have a game.
Don't do it, Vagn!
Stop the car! Stop the car!
Go away. I'm going now.
I'm speeding up, John.
Stop the car! | - Don't kill me.
Stop, damn it! | - Only on one condition!
Two conditions, John.
No more stick-ups! | - Fine.
And it's all the way to the bus. | - I always keep up my end.
And if you rat me out, | I'll make sure you never...
You have my word. Once we reach | the bus I forget about you forever.
I don't feel so good...
Maybe you got a concussion | when you banged your head.
Ew, gross! All over your shoes.
Those are not coming in my car. | - But they're my favorite.
There's puke all over.
It's the answering machine. The | gas station is closed due to a robbery.
Are you sure it's the right number? | - You think Vagn held it up?
Funny we haven't seen him since. | - We forgot him.
Vagn is out there alone somewhere. | We need to turn the bus around.
Vagn is a grown man. | He will get there.
I wouldn't file | a missing person's report.
All Swedish cops are dirty bastards.
Prepare for a dirty game tomorrow.
Why didn't he call us?
Do you know my number by heart? | How about Erling's?
Of course not. We're neighbors.
Fix that and get it turned on. | Maybe he called his phone.
I saw him steal on the ferry. | - Go to the back and be quiet.
Shouldn't we vote on it? | - Yes!
Who is in favor of...
I demand it be an anonymous vote. | My vote is my business.
Who's for an anonymous vote? | - No one gives a shit!
Who's for going to Western World?
Who's talking about Western World?
So what do you do? | - I'm a janitor.
Where? | - Herlev Junior High.
Any fun?
I'm really a book binder.
This is just temporary.
How long have you played soccer? | - Since I was a kid.
Six or seven years old.
Are you married?
Why are you asking? | Why are you asking me all this?
I'm just making conversation.
No, you're giving me the third degree.
I just asked if you were married! | - I'm not obliged to tell you.
Then don't!
It's just a bit odd to be | interrogated by a violent crook.
I'm not violent! | Shut it, or I'll smack you!
Always with the hitting.
You can ask me anything. | - I don't want to play that game.
I don't buy that.
You seem like the curious type. | And I know people.
Ask me something.
What are you doing in Sweden?
You don't want to know. | - There you go.
Seriously. | Ask me something else.
I want to know why someone | like you is driving me around.
Because we made a deal | and I keep up my end.
What are you doing in Sweden? | There are gas stations in Denmark too.
I can't go back. | - Why not? Why are you here?
Because I am exiled!
What?
I owe some guys money.
Some gangbangers. | - You're right.
I can't go back without the dough. | - Please stop.
A good friend screwed me over. | - I really don't want to hear this.
I'll fuck him up. | - My ears are ringing.
If I show my face in Copenhagen | without the cash... They'll kill me.
Can't hear you... What?
What are they going to do? | - The end.
What kind of people do that? | - Game over!
He is eh... Fifty-eight... Sixty...
Five... Sixty... | There abouts.
If he what?
Did he seem depressed?
Not really.
No, he didn't. Thanks. Bye-bye.
Listen up! We're not going back. | The gas station is closed.
Vagn is either on his way to us | or on his way home.
So far the Swedish police will | inform us of any development.
Let's make the most of it.
Vagn won't come if he's the robber.
If you must know... | I'm not married.
No wonder. You look like shit. | - Is it that bad?
No...
It's worse.
Goal minus Doubt equals Reality.
Something I read the other day.
You read books? | - Sure, I've read 106 books.
Mostly about spiritual stuff | and personal growth.
I think everything | has a deeper meaning.
Your buddies forgot you... | - They didn't forget.
Yeah, whatever. | There's a deeper meaning. For sure.
Have you read | "The Celestine Prophecy"?
Great book! It's about a man who | goes on a journey of the senses.
He journeys into the soul while on his | travels and discovers some writings.
During this journey... | No, you have to read it.
They didn't forget me. | - I can't believe you haven't read it.
Have you read Kierkegaard?
I tried... But I don't get it.
I think I've seen one of his movies.
I'll have the same. | Mackerel and mayo on top.
Hi, honey. | It's going just fine.
Did you by any chance talk to Vagn?
We forgot him. | Yes, I know it's bad.
The interesting thing about coaching | is that it focusses entirely on you.
The enneagram technique | divides you into numbers.
I'll bet you're a four.
The romantic type.
Is that good? | - It's not about good or bad...
No, it's not. | I'm an eight.
The challenger.
Too tight? | - No... I'll pay you later.
They're a gift. We help each other.
Anyone can be up shit creek, | just like you were.
That's what friends are for.
We better... | - What's your favorite movie?
Mine is "Scent of a Woman"... | with that blind guy.
That girl is really hot. | I'd fuck her any day.
Let's get moving.
I really like Jane Seymour.
The Danes couldn't beat Brazil 4-0. | - What are you talking about?
DFA paid 100 grand for every ball | the Brazilians let pass.
Bullshit! | - It's a known fact. 400 grand, easy.
Niller from DFA ran off with the cash.
They never heard from him. | Rumors have it he went to Spain.
You can't live off 400.000 | the rest of your life.
In Crete you get a three course meal | with Retzina for less than a hundred.
That's a bargain.
Goddamn it!
What the fuck, Willy?
Jesus Christ! | - Look, it's Aase.
Willy, did you bring dead Aase? | - That's disgusting, Willy!
Cut it out. | - No way. That's too creepy.
Dogs aren't allowed in Sweden.
Shut your trap, Erling! | - No.
You can't bring dogs and meat. | It's a federal crime.
They have to be quarantined. | - Exactly!
Okay, guys. Willy is really sorry.
He didn't have time | to bury Aase -
...and he didn't have the heart | to leave her at home.
We can't drive around | with a dead dog.
Let's just bury the bitch in a ditch.
Let's vote on it. An anonymous vote.
Fine! Who is for it? | - Me.
For what? | You can't ask that way!
Listen! Why can't we vote...
Bye-bye.
Can I borrow your phone again? | I'll pay you.
I can't afford that, Frank! | - She's Danish.
The phone... I'll pay you.
Shut up about the money.
Try to get hold of Kirsten. | She's married to Erling.
Inge's son. | Mom, the kid with the mucus.
The movies? What did you see?
Okay. Put your dad on again.
She knows Vivi | who's married to Henrik B.
Yes... Take care.
Yes, I left some flowers this morning.
I saw you did too. | It looked really nice.
I miss him too. | He was a good man.
I have to go. Talk to you soon.
My mom.
Who died? | - No one.
My dad. But that's many years ago. | He died today.
Do you want to talk about it? | - No, no...
You know I'm a good listener, right? | - No, not really.
Traumatic experiences | can block your entire system.
It's 45 years ago... | - Fries with barnaise?
The fish is on its way.
He ordered tartar sauce. | - Sorry, we don't have that.
That's alright.
Your job doesn't require brains.
The least you could do | is remember what people order!
My friend wants tartar sauce | with his fries, you moron!
It's not okay. | - It's fine. I like the fries.
It's not okay. You need to | put your foot down, Vagn.
Imagine the world populated | by guys like him.
Put your foot down. Sometimes you | gotta say: "Hey, I want tartar sauce. "
Otherwise you'll be very unhappy.
Put your foot down. Alright?
You should eat healthier too.
It all has to do with | your childhood. You know?
You can just keep on going, huh? | - What do you mean?
You seem very persistent.
Just curious. | I think I can help you.
It builds up inside your body.
I've helped a lot of buddies inside, | just by listening.
You'll feel better afterwards. | - That's nice, but I don't need help.
That's what you say now.
In a couple of hours we split up. | We'll never see each other again.
Alright!
He died 45 years ago today.
I had just had my communion.
On Sundays we played soccer | at the local soccer field from 10-12.
My dad was in charge of the field.
He mowed the lawn | and chalked the lines before a game.
I used to help him. | Afterwards we played soccer.
Just him and me.
And then...
He passes the ball to me -
...and I'm running toward the goal | where he is standing...
Suddenly he was on the ground.
He was foaming around the mouth. | I didn't know what to do, so I...
I sat down beside him | and said: "I'm right here. "
I don't know how long I sat there. | It feels like days.
Some adults came and | the ambulance drove off with him.
I was in shock for weeks.
That image kept haunting me.
I didn't attend his funeral, either. | I just couldn't...
I know I should have been there.
That's something | I'll never forgive myself...
...for not being there.
What's going on? | - That's father Ekdahl.
We're going to a funeral. | - Who died?
Your dad. | - I don't want to. No, you're nuts.
Parting with Oswald Bendtsen -
...doesn't mean good-bye forever.
As it's written in | the Book of John, chapter 14:
"In my Father's house | are many mansions -
...and where I go, you know the way. "
No one wants to end | their days by saying:
"If I had my life over | I would climb more mountains -
...and swim more rivers, | take more chances -
I would have more troubles, | but fewer imaginary ones. "
The day is our Lord's creation.
Let us find joy in it. | Every day is a gift.
Seize the day and squeeze every | little drop of joy and love from it.
This is life.
Ashes to ashes, | dust to dust...
...Jesus Christ, our Savior -
will awaken you | on Judgment Day.
Amen.
Get off me, you sick fuck!
Hey! Stop it!
Okay, party's ov...
Way to go, Vagn.
We can't stay. We have to leave.
Bastard!
I need my bag. | - Vagn! Grab her bag.
Her bag!
I have to pick up my son.
What the fuck... | I just want to get my son.
Lone-ly lady fourty-one
cute and chubby, lots of fun
People aren't up for that.
We're sailing up the river...
Listen to me! | It's not the time nor place for singing.
It's not the words | you are saying
it's more the lying in itself
So you have a son? | - Yes. Patrick.
How old is he? | - Five.
Five! That's a good age. | - You have kids?
Not as far as I know. | Or no, I dont. Do you?
Apart from Patrick? | - No.
You have to be ready for kids. | - Yeah.
That's why I never had any.
Or maybe I didn't have time | or met the right person.
So you're married | or what do you do for a living?
I was married to Patrick's dad.
He owns the club I work at. | I'm a bartender.
Bartender! Wow, that's cool. | - I hate it.
He moved to Uppsala with a Polish girl | and they get my son every six weeks.
Great, right?
Where did you guys meet?
We met... His friends forgot him and | they have a soccer game tomorrow.
I felt sorry for him, | so I offered him a ride.
So that's what I'm doing. | - Okay.
So what do you do? | - Me?
I'll probably study psychology or...
Maybe coaching. Have you | read "The Celestine Prophecy"?
It's about a man's journey... | - I've read it.
Really? Have you read it? | Shut up!
Vagn! Vagn!
Jeanne has read | "The Celestine Prophecy"!
Are you a virgin?
I mean Virgo. | You're a lot like a Virgo.
Are you now an astrologer too? | - No, but it holds some interest.
What am I then? I'm not a Virgo.
Then I bet you're a Libra. | - Are you for real?
You're guessing. I'm a Taurus. | - Taurus is controlled by Venus.
A real fighter, but she's also lazy.
Incredibly stubborn, | but admits she's not always right.
Sometimes she's an introvert, but | she's mostly happy and outgoing.
That's true for everyone. | It might as well be Hitler.
That's so Taurus! | - I know a lot about...
Hitler was an Aries. | - Are Aries like Hitler then?
My son is an Aries. | Are you telling me, he's like Hitler?
All Aries are not like Hitler! | Some are.
All this talk about Hitler. | - For real?
I'm proud of my interest | in spirituality and...
What's so funny? | What's so funny?
A lot of my friends | have been grateful for my help.
I stood by them 100%. Right, Vagn? | - Sure, sure.
See? Friends who call me to talk.
John here.
Who?
Hang on a minute.
Vagn, it's your mother. | - She has my coach's number.
Are you that far, already?
Henrik, a lot has happened. | I'll get there on my own.
I'll drive you.
Just give me the address. | I'll get there.
Yeah, I'll hold.
She's unique. | - No, she's a bitch.
She's nuts about you. | - No, she hates me.
She thinks you're sweet. | She looking again.
Be yourself. Don't be a smart-ass. | - Me? She's such a show off.
Drop all that talk about books. | It just seems...
Yes, I'm here. | Yes, that's out of the way.
I'll drive you all the way.
Just give me the address...
I'd forgotten how hungry I was.
Fine, just give me the address. | I have to find a pen.
You just stay here and...
Thunderbird.
From '65. | The hind lights have grits.
My dad told me | I was made in one of them.
My favorite is a Ford Mustang.
A late '65. | - 4,7 liter.
289.
Straight-6 motor. | - V8.
Pony interior. | - A round speedometer.
No, that's the '66.
You're such a pain in the ass.
I know.
It usually takes longer | before people tell me.
Alright... That's a deal.
You'll really drive me all the way? | - I always keep up my end.
Henrik, I'll get there on my own.
Oh, Henrik...
How long did it take? | Before you noticed I was gone?
Oh... Alright then. Bye.
They didn't forget. It was a mistake. | They were probably worried.
Shut up, John. | Of course they forgot.
Why do I have to sleep down there?
Because I was here first. | Too bad, Erling.
Bullshit. Why couldn't I choose?
I was here first!
You want some bread | to go with that whine?
Nice tattoo. | What does it say?
Reebok, rebook?
No, it says Rebel. It's old. | - Cool.
I have one too. Check this out.
It hurt like hell.
Check this out.
Nicole Kidman stayed there.
Nice place, right?
Wait, wait... Hold that. | - I am!
There! | - Start her up.
Hello. | - Hi.
What happened here? | - We just...
The car stalled.
Who's the owner? | - It's my... Car.
No, your driver's license!
Would you grab my license | in the glove compartment?
Thanks. Here you go.
What's in the bag?
What's in the bag? | - It's...
It's mine!
It's my bag. It's soccer gear. | I'm a goalie.
The players in the bus left me behind.
So my friend John here -
...is helping me get to my bus.
We have a game in Gaevle tomorrow.
Against the police. | - They stink!
Those old bastards.
That guy, Stig. A real boozer. | And a dirty player.
Alright, I'll pass it on.
Cool... Soccer.
I can't afford that. | - No worries.
You prefer something else? | - No, it's fantastic.
A lot better than staying | with Frank and Nurlana.
We could find something smaller. | Maybe a hostel?
We're not staying at a hostel.
Nicole Kidman stayed here.
What?
There's puke on your shirt.
You figure it out! | It's just four days.
Did you ever stop to think | he might have missed you?
You never did. | You never asked me that either.
Good-bye, Frank.
The jerk never once | asked me how I was.
Fuck him.
Oh... it's John's.
There's a party in the restaurant. | You wanna check it out?
What's so funny? | Tell me. What is it?
It's your T-shirt on me. | - Hilarious.
That's a pull-out couch. For you. | - You too.
Who's that Nico Kritman-guy?
Nicole Kidman! | Don't you know her?
I'd do her... | Back to the sleeping arrangements.
I think it's a private party.
Cheers. Welcome.
Just a word...
Let me have your attention.
We have a long day ahead of us | tomorrow, so lights out at eleven.
By eleven-thirty I want quiet.
Who took my brewski?
And keep the beer at a minimum.
Good, that's agreed!
Sleep tight, guys!
I don't dance. I don't want to.
Let's change partners.
Thanks. | - You're welcome.
You and John... | You look good together.
He's a good kid.
He's quite a hand-full, | but a good kid.
How about you, Vagn? | Are you married?
No, no, I'm single.
I don't think I've met the one. | - I think you've met her often.
I'm a good person.
I just have to believe in myself | and express my feelings.
Then I can get anyone.
Have you never been in love? | - Sure, I have.
When I was 25. | Her name was Vivi.
She was special. She was a hippie.
We called her Hippie Vivi.
She was incredibly pretty. | We were inseparable.
She was all I cared about. | You know?
I even proposed to her | on one knee and all.
What happened?
She... Left me.
Have you never been in love since? | - No. Vivi was one in a million.
"That Love is all there is, | is all we know of love. "
Missy Elliott.
John, you have to tell Jeanne | about your activities.
Yeah, sure. That's the plan.
...two, one, go!
25 seconds!
Vagn, it's for you.
Hello? Oh, Henrik...
Yes, it is a bad time. I'm dancing.
Just a second...
None of your damn business!
Sure I'm drunk. | I'm been on the team for 24 years.
In all those years | no one ever asked me how I was.
And I'll be at the game | in my own damn time.
Good-bye!
Well, I'll be...
Jeanne? Jeanne...
I have to tell you something. | - What?
It's important that I say this. | - What?
Is it me? | - No, no. You're fantastic.
Fuck it. It can wait.
Gunilla?
Thank you.
What... Hi, Vagn. | - Hi. Ready to go?
You're looking sharp.
So you banged the chef, huh?
Can I borrow your phone? | - She wasn't half bad.
Except for the bald spot, but... | - All I remember is we danced.
Then we went to her room to | get cigarettes.
Suddenly she stripped and | they were swinging back and forth.
I couldn't get it up last night. | - What?
I couldn't get it up. | - So you...
No, I couldn't. It was... | - It happens.
I feel awful.
I think I'm in love. | It's like walking on air.
Good party last night. | Where'd you go? We waited for you.
Should we get going?
You smell deep-fried.
Mornin', guys! Sleep well?
I can't sleep in this shit. | My back is out. I can't play today.
Always an excuse for sitting one out.
I had an irritable bowel last year. | - You still are.
Watch the tone. I understand | if you're nervous before the game.
At least hold off until tonight!
Guys, I have a couple of messages.
The game has been postponed.
The police forgot to book the field. | - Those pigs!
Thanks, Jorgen. | So we'll play this afternoon instead.
Get your gear on! | We're ready in a minute.
Vagn called. He's on his way.
He's not sure he'll be here in time.
But since the game is this afternoon -
...maybe it's a gift from above | that he's late.
Guys! Get you gear on! | See you in five!
Damn it, Bitten.
She's got her head up her ass.
I'm not wearing this. No fucking way.
Has anyone seen my underwear?
So Morten Olsen mastered | the off-side play.
Off-side is very tricky.
You're not off-side on your own half | or if you're in line -
with the opposing team's second | to last player or the last player.
Most likely the goalie. Gravity is | important, because the lower...
Let it ring!
Shit...
Start her up!
He wasn't off-side after all. | They lost 3-1.
The referee always gets balled out. | He makes split decisions.
The off-side rule is impossible -
...because the assistant referee | can't be in two places at once...
Stop it! | Don't grope me. Stop the car!
I just... | - Forget it, creep. Stop the car!
What the hell is up with you?
Shut your trap. Leave me alone.
Go after her, John.
Jeanne!
Jeanne, get in the car.
I'm sorry. | - Sorry?
You're the biggest psycho I ever met.
I'm through with guys like you. | And you too!
Leave Vagn out of this. | - Just stay away, John.
Jeanne, damn it... what's up? | - You know what!
I was this close to falling for you. | This close.
Fuck you.
Fuck you too!
Look at your bag.
You didn't tell her. | - No, I never did.
I was just about to, when... | - You have to stop that shit.
You think living like this is free? | Everything costs money!
You've got to quit, John.
Come on. Follow her.
Looking good.
That's the Swedes. Hey-hey.
Hey. Heysan.
They look way younger than us.
I'd like a chat with their coach.
She was this close to falling for you. | - I heard.
She also told me to fuck off. | - Yes, and with good reason.
Are you telling me to fuck off?
You can't live like that in the long run. | No one can.
Just find the truck.
About that debt... | How much do you owe those guys?
120.000. | It was actually only 26.000.
The rest is interest.
Maybe I can help. | I put a little aside...
Stop it!
Don't you get it! I'm not to be trusted.
I can't do anything right! | - John...
I was never good at anything.
John, it... | - I just want to go home.
Don't start crying.
It's not true. You...
Everything I touch goes to shit. | I'll never find the truck.
But you're the reason I'm here now.
You deserve better than me, Vagn.
It's not true.
You're a good sport. | - You too.
You know what?
We're going to the game, | and you're gonna win it.
For your dad! Fuck everything else. | - There it is!
Hi, Sweetie!
Cute kid, huh?
It's now or never.
What if she turns me down? | - Then you proved you're a fighter.
Some candy?
Come on. It's totally whacked.
What did you say?
I said I was sorry and would have | told her. She asked me to leave.
What a stupid idea! | Thanks a lot, Vagn!
What does she want from me? | Do I have to turn myself in?
That might be a good idea. | - What?
That you turned yourself in. | - Are you on crack?
You can't live like this forever. | - Shut it, Vagn.
Would you rather lose | a great girl like her?
A chance like this comes maybe | twice in a lifetime. Vivi and I met...
Put a sock in it, you old fuck!
What the hell do you know?
It's your fault I made an ass of myself. | You haven't had a girl in 40 years.
What the hell do you know? | Fucking stooge!
No wonder your friends forgot you.
And soccer! You're too old | and weak to play sports!
Why don't you piss out of this car and | find your loser friends on your own?
Get out! Go!
What are you doing here? | - I just came to say good-bye.
Where's John? | - He drove off. He's not coming back.
I can't be with someone who... | - I understand, but...
But John is really a good kid.
I'm sure he would | have told you in time.
But he didn't.
Cute kid you got there.
Anyway, good-bye. | - I'm sorry you missed your game.
Well, there's still 100 kilometers.
That's 10 Swedish miles...
...or English... well...
It was nice to meet you. | - Wait, Vagn.
Hi, Nurlana. Is Frank here?
Frank? Frank!
My back aches. | - He has a medical certificate.
I want you on that field! | Get undressed, now.
It's time to get a move on.
First guy who says anything! | - We finally got a cheerleader.
Warm up, people! | Shut up, Erling!
Warm up, guys! | Send the balls over here.
How is that still funny?
Don't fear their counter attack. | We're using the 1-2-3 line up.
We push them from the get-go. | Be alert and work with each other.
Our defense is too weak for that. | - Among other things.
Who let four goals go in last time? | - I can't take you seriously.
Shouldn't I play a quick... | - Nope.
Not now!
I don't want our national hymn | in the middle of my speech.
Sit down!
Would you please listen? | Stop interrupting!
Shut up, Erling! Shut up!
We're using the 1-2-3 line up!
So we push them... | - Look, it's Vagn!
Who is she? | - Who's that gal?
Hi, Vagn. I'm glad you came.
Hi, Vagn. Vagn is back!
That's Jeanne and Patrick.
Better late than never. | - We missed you.
Old buddy.
I'm really, really, really sorry.
It's all my fault. Come here.
How are you doing? | - I'm fine.
You can change in the bus.
Let's hear it for Vagn. He's back.
Move it, guys.
Good, Preben.
Alright!
Swedish prick!
For fuck's sake!
Good, Svend-Erik!
Stay with the ball, guys!
Hi...
Hi...
You forgot your shoes in the car?
Just leave them there.
I felt I should drop them off.
Are they all cops?
Well done, Vagn!
I wanted to see you play | and I've heard so much -
...and we made that deal...
Damn, that's a lot of cops. | - Look alive, Erling!
I'm way alive, asshole!
Vagn... I'm real sorry, man.
I had no right interfering...
I butted in, gave you some advice, | and I'm sorry about that.
I shouldn't have. | - Sure, you should.
That's what friends are for. | They help each other out.
You don't leave them hanging | with big choices to make.
You look out for each other, right? | - Jeanne is here.
Yeah, I know.
Counter attack!
Go, Manne!
Beautiful, Vagn!
Free kick!
To the left...
Hi. I robbed three gas stations...
Take it easy, man!
Stop that!
Hey!
What's going on?
What the fuck!
I have to go to Crete on Saturday!
Dear John. I hope they are | treating you alright in there.
Although you were against it | I've paid off most of your debt.
My dad's coin collection turned out | to be worth more that I thought.
It was just lying around anyway | and kind of nice to get rid of.
And you don't have a car anymore.
I used the money in the bag | as payment.
It took a bit longer than expected, | but now it's done.
Thanks for the books.
We weren't thinking | about the same Kierkegaard.
But who cares?
It made me proud to hear that | you help the other convicts to vent.
Good for you.
And I've met someone.
I don't think I've told you.
Her name is Bente.
It's as if we've known each other | a hundred years. You know?
Jeanne says hi. I take Patrick to | soccer practice every Wednesday.
She still thinks about you.
I have to go. | We have to leave for a game.
Don't make any trouble in there. | Take care, until I see you again.
Your friend, Vagn.