Opus (2025) Movie Script
1
(ROCK BAND PLAYING GENTLE INTRO)
(CROWD CHEERING FAINTLY)
(ELECTRIC GUITAR PLAYING
MELLOW SOLO)
(CHEERING CONTINUES)
(CHEERING GROWS LOUDER)
Tamra is a legend.
Yeah, yeah, she's had two
hitless albums back-to-back,
but someone else's take
isn't the ticket.
We need hers.
We need someone who can
get her to actually open up
and be honest.
Somebody who can
get her to say something
brutal or cocky,
whatever it actually is.
What does she still want
from music?
What does she still think was,
you know, missing
from that last project?
The only thing a story
about a legend like Tamra Camden
is missing
is as much Tamra Camden
as possible.
STAN: Damn good point, Ariel.
-(MURMURS OF AGREEMENT)
-I'd read that.
(CHUCKLES) Thank you.
Uh, I mean,
I would love to maybe--
What about Chris Wreath
to write it?
I mean, he would be
inspired, right?
Yeah, strong agree.
I'll send him a note.
Done.
Okay. Good job.
(PAPERS SHUFFLING)
Moving on. (SIGHS)
On to the M.O.B.
(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING)
ARIEL: It's just driving me
fucking nuts.
I've been there for three years.
Three years of my life,
and I haven't written
a single real story.
-Yes, you have.
-No, I haven't.
What are you talking about?
I loved that piece on that,
uh... What was it?
Blind martial arts instructor.
-Oh, yeah, okay.
-How'd he do
that three-finger thing?
-Oh. Like...
-It was like...
(BOTH GRUNTING FIERCELY)
(BOTH LAUGHING)
-Wow, you look cute today.
-Stop. (GROANS)
-Okay.
-Okay.
This is how I see it.
Step one,
write about famous people
because they're
inherently fascinating.
That's where I'm at right now.
-Step two...
-"Famous people."
Okay. Step two,
people start
to find me fascinating
'cause I'm writing
about fascinating people.
And then, three,
take that goodwill and use it
to write whatever
the fuck I want.
What's the...
what's the end goal
of all that, though?
Like, what's the point?
-Write a book. Like...
-Mmm.
Books, plural.
Then, show people that...
I don't know...
that I'm a good fucking writer.
Show them what I... I think
and... and...
and feel, love, hate.
But at this rate,
I'll be, like, 35
before that ever happens,
which is basically 40.
Sorry, no offense.
Whoa, hold up. I'm...
I... I'm only 32.
-What the hell?
-I'm like... I rounded up.
-That's wack.
-That's my fault.
-I... I rounded up.
-Okay, also,
is this one of those vents
where you just need to vent
or one of the rare vents
where you actually
want advice?
Wow. Okay.
The former. Right.
Can you pass me the...
I am open.
I will take advice. I'm open.
-For real?
-Yeah, for real.
Okay.
Well, with love and compassion,
I don't think anyone gives
a fuck about what you feel
or love or hate.
Listen,
you're only 27 years old.
You didn't grow up poor or rich.
You have a good job,
a perfect bill of health.
No addictions, no enemies.
Hell, you've never let
anyone in close enough,
present company included,
to actually break your heart.
And your parents are perfect,
which is why you always
shit on my mom.
No, I always shit on your mom
'cause she's fucking crazy.
Your problem is that
you're middle.
Which is okay. Most people are.
But it's experience
that gives people perspective,
and it's perspective
that gives opinions their value,
and yours is...
it's middle as fuck.
Okay.
(SIGHS)
This eel is delicious,
by the way.
Yeah, it's really good.
No, it's really, really good.
-Are you okay?
-(MUTTERS)
'Cause I could...
I could take that back.
The eel is really good.
-(PHONES RINGING)
-(BUSY CHATTER)
EDITOR 1: So...
EDITOR 2: I mean,
now is the time, then.
EDITOR 1: But why?
Why is now the time?
EDITOR 2: I mean,
all the pictures
are dropping in.
Like, do you think
he had a ton of work
done to his face?
Probably, but I'm calling
bullshit on the whole thing.
What's up?
There's a rumor flying around
that Moretti's back.
Like, "Moretti" Moretti?
Oh, shit.
I know. It's a big day for me.
Dina Simone
was my first ringtone.
Dina Simone was everyone's
first ringtone.
Well, don't be a dick.
Ooh, Stan.
You hear?
(SING-SONGY) Moretti's back.
-STAN: Oh, my God. You, too?
-(LAUGHS) I...
Are we done? Huh?
I mean, if social media
wants to freak out
over every rumor,
so be it, but you guys
are supposed to be journalists.
Besides, no one
has seen or heard from Moretti
in 30 years.
If there was an album,
I am sure they'd release it
the same way he always did.
Uh, his publicist,
Soledad Yusef,
would mail in a VHS of him
nonsensically just rattling off
Moretti's career highlights
and proclaiming that
a new album was on the way.
It was nauseating.
-Look at this.
-What's this?
SOLEDAD: (OVER COMPUTER)
Hello, my loves.
Hello.
STAN: Holy shit,
that's actually him.
It's been a long time
since we've done this dance.
(STAN WHISTLES, CHUCKLES)
But I think this dance we do
is a timeless one. Don't you?
(STAN LAUGHS)
SOLEDAD: A lot has changed
in the last 27 years.
Oh, my God.
Can you believe
it's been 27 years?
Look at me.
I'm like a silver fox. (LAUGHS)
Okay. I'm having too much fun.
-Enough about me.
-(STAN CHUCKLES)
What about him? What about him?
Mr. Glam-boyant himself.
The Velvet Caller. Don Diva.
The Wizard of Wiggle.
The icon responsible
for the highest-grossing
world tour in history.
The only living artist to
secure 38 number one singles.
Yes. Yes.
It is with... Ooh!
Unmitigated joy
that I announce to you,
my babies,
he's bringing you a gift.
(SIGHS)
The greatest album
of modern times.
(SCOFFS)
Future times, all times, really.
And, in typical
Debutante fashion,
he'll be playing for a select
group of people this weekend
before he gives this
new blessing unto the world.
And there is more to come.
So much more.
Such a sweet little thing
Dina
And you deserve
Million-dollar rings
Simone
I like
Your tight little jeans
Dina
And I love how
She dress like a saint
(SINGING ALONG)
Simone
Hold me, baby
Hold me tight
Kiss me, girl
It's Saturday night
...Alfred Moretti.
See me watching
Paint the town
She's with us
Queens and Crown
All I want is you
And diamonds on me
Ooh, don't you ever
Show me mercy, ooh
I'm here alone
With reservations for three
I need you
You too, perfect, yeah
Such a sweet little thing
Dina
And you deserve
Million-dollar rings
Simone
I like
Your tight little jeans
Dina
And I love how
She dress like a saint
Simone
You chauffeur 'round
All around the town
In Cadillac Sedan de Villes
And sex
Is your favorite thing
Cocaine and blue pills
You, club
You, ballet
She, in the bedroom
Her right here
In the valet
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Bodies intertwine
In the dark lights
Our souls
Oh, shit.
Exchange under
The night sky
Raging bulls
Till we fall asleep
The sun is coming for us
Jealousy
Such a sweet little thing
Dina
And you deserve
Million-dollar rings
Simone
-(SONG ENDS)
-He's back, my babies.
(LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Ugh. Classic.
Truly a perfect album,
up there with Thriller,
Hotel California, Nebraska.
WOMAN: There's a second one.
This is for, uh...
Ariel Ecton.
-WOMAN: Who?
-MAN: Seriously?
(OTHERS MURMURING)
CLARA: (OVER TV)
So, what do you think
of the news of Moretti
coming out of retirement?
WOMAN: (OVER TV) Oh, my gosh,
I mean, it feels like a dream,
you know?
I used to listen to him
all the time as a kid,
and now my kids
get their own Moretti album.
(LAUGHING)
And you, sir?
Moretti sleeps 12 hours a day,
and then stands 12 hours a day.
Like, it's
a "balance of life" thing.
This is my favorite rumor
about this guy.
Somebody's trying to suggest
that he bought
Freddie Mercury's teeth.
(LAUGHS)
-And he might--
-Today's top story,
Alfred Moretti,
arguably the biggest pop star
of the '90s,
has resurfaced
after a 30-year hiat...
(CHUCKLES)
(ENTHRALLING MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRDS CALLING)
STAN: Smell that desert air.
ARIEL: Oh, yeah, it's amazing.
-STAN: Right? Oh.
-ARIEL: Hello.
-Hello. Oh, okay. Okay.
-ARIEL: Oh. (CLEARS THROAT)
Ms. Ecton. Mr. Sullivan.
Welcome to Green River, Utah.
It'll be an absolute honor
to spend this weekend with you.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
Namaste.
Uh, the other guests
are waiting just this way.
Please follow me as we board
the infamous Louise.
Holy shit.
Slow Lo.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
So, uh, rumor had it
that when Moretti toured,
his outfits were
so damn heavy that the--
Yeah, they would
weigh the bus down,
and they would have to,
uh, stop to fuel twice as much
'cause it was so slow and low.
-Hence the name.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
ARIEL: I just...
I did a little research.
STAN: No, that's impressive.
That's really impressive.
-ARIEL: Thanks.
-STAN: Yeah. Nice job, rookie.
ARIEL: Okay.
-(ENGINE STARTS)
-Well, lookie here.
-Hey. Long time, huh?
-(LAUGHS)
-(LAUGHING)
-CLARA: Hey.
Oh, everybody, uh, meet Ariel.
Some young blood from
the magazine tagging along.
-Hi.
-This is Clara,
who you know of, I'm sure.
And, of course, Bianca Tyson,
the top paparazza in the game.
-Stan.
-(STAN LAUGHS)
-Clara. Clara.
-Stan.
-CLARA: Stan.
-(STAN AND CLARA LAUGH)
STAN: I see you, uh,
took a break from being
the most hated sex symbol on TV
to join us.
Key words, "sex symbol..."
Thank you... And "TV."
How's print media treating you?
Oh.
-Nice to meet you, dear.
-Oh, nice to meet you.
STAN: I'm not sure who that is.
That is Emily Katz.
-She's an influencer.
-STAN: Oh, Lord help us.
Wait, sorry.
Is she talking to Bill Lotto?
BIANCA: Oh, I know, right?
You'd think some of the sheen
would wear off after he pivoted
to podcasts.
I'm surprised he even came,
to be honest.
What do you mean?
Why would he miss
the event of the century?
They hated each other.
Ladies and gentlemen,
we are about to depart
on our
four-hour-and-eight-minute
journey.
Please feel free to luxuriate
until our arrival.
CLARA: Thank you.
(LAUGHS)
(BRAKES HISSING,
ENGINE ACCELERATING)
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
Oh, my God. Cindy Crawford
is such a legend.
She's my favorite
of his girlfriends.
CLARA: Oh, that is sexy.
(LAUGHING) What are they doing?
Stan, have you been
reading this?
Hmm?
Oh, it's from the basket, right?
I haven't. What's the haps?
I mean, the haps are very,
uh, specific. They...
Hey, so this is a good time
to establish our game plan.
Oh. Yeah.
Okay. Yes, actually.
I was, uh, writing
some stuff down earlier.
-Great.
-Yeah.
So, you know, obviously,
I'll be the one
who writes the review
and the piece,
but what I could
really use your help with
is some note-taking.
Okay. Yeah, um, I... I would...
-You know, I could share--
-Nah, just the note-taking.
Anything you see.
Weird books or, uh,
I don't know, orgies, whatever.
Just, uh, write it down,
and I'll give it a look
at the end of the weekend.
Got it?
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
(STAN INHALES DEEPLY)
You know, I'm...
I'm really happy for you.
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
(WIND WHISTLING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(EXCITED SHOUTING)
Who are these people?
Moretti diehards.
They've been congregating
since the announcement.
I even heard a few have been
sleeping in their cars.
All hoping to get
a glimpse of him.
Some people really need a hobby.
(EMILY CHUCKLES)
(CHEERING)
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
FAN: I love you!
(BIRDS CALLING)
(ENTHRALLING MUSIC PLAYING)
CLARA: Oh, thanks, honey.
I mean, had to wear
the boots, right?
-JORG: Right this way.
-STAN: They look perfect.
-CLARA: Thanks.
-STAN: Oh, my goodness.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(CLARA LAUGHS)
Welcome.
Before you head
to your respective rooms
to freshen up,
to ensure
the integrity of this event,
deposit your cell phones here.
We will return them Sunday
after your experience is over.
CLARA: No problem.
STAN: Thank you.
-(STAN SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
-(CLARA LAUGHING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Hey.
Ms. Katz. (CLEARS THROAT)
(CELL PHONE DROPS IN BASKET)
Thank you.
This is a gift.
-STAN: Oh.
-CLARA: Thank you.
WOMAN: Welcome, Ms. Ecton.
CLARA: It's beautiful.
-STAN: (WHISPERS) Ariel.
-I'm gonna put this by my Emmy.
-(STAN MOUTHING)
-Okay.
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
(QUIET, INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(BIRDS CHIRPING, CAWING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(DOOR OPENS)
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
(DOOR CLOSES)
Over the years,
my concerts attracted
a, uh, veritable who's who
of the revered
and the beatified.
And after every show,
it was customary
for me to invite some of them
backstage to my green room
to take photos
and exchange pleasantries.
And, one night,
I had the unbelievable honor
to welcome both Chuck Norris
and Muhammad Ali.
And as is always the case
when two alpha males enter
the same space,
a competition ensued.
And soon enough,
Chuck Norris stood up
and announced that his hands
were so fast
that he could chop
a mosquito in half.
And just as he had finished
that sentence...
Hi-ya!
-(MURMURING, CHUCKLING)
-I looked down at the floor,
and sure enough,
there's a mosquito
chopped in half.
Ali doesn't skip a beat.
He stands up,
goes to the center of the room,
kind of leans back a bit.
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
Double-jabs it.
I look down on the floor,
and there is a mosquito
chopped into four tiny bits.
The entire room applauds.
But Chuck Norris,
very determined,
does not give up.
He reclaims
the center of the room.
Locates one, and then...
(GRUNTING FIERCELY)
(SCATTERED LAUGHTER)
I look down, and sure enough,
there lay a little bloodsucker
cut into six tiny portions.
And Ali, cool as a cucumber,
he stands,
scouring the room,
locates a mosquito.
-Whack.
-(CLARA CHUCKLES)
I look up, and that mosquito
is still airborne.
I say, "Ali, champ,
"that mosquito is still
flying around."
Ali turns back to me,
and he says,
"Yeah, he's still flying around,
"but he'll never have children."
(LAUGHTER)
And so,
let me be the first
to congratulate all of you
on being the first to hear
my 18th studio album,
Caesar's Request.
(APPLAUSE)
Let's dine, shall we?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
-Hi. It's so nice
to finally meet you.
-Pleasure.
(CHATTER CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
-It's good to see you.
-You, too.
-Alfred.
-Young man.
-Mmm.
-Pleasure.
I'd like to start off
by saying...
-Water under the bridge.
-Exactly.
(CHATTER CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
-BILL: You look good, man.
-MORETTI: You look good, too.
Not as good as me.
-Oh.
-Thanks, Ariel.
Hey. I heard
you're from New York City.
-Is that true?
-Uh, yes, it is true.
That's so cool.
-Thanks.
-I like your hair.
I like your hair, too.
Uh, my name's Ariel.
Nice to meet you, Ariel.
-I'm Maude.
-Nice to meet you, Maude.
Would you like to sit
with me, Ariel?
Yes.
Yes, I would.
(GLASS CLINKING)
STAN: Now a toast, if I may.
Because this, my old friend,
does not happen anymore.
This, we have missed,
as we have missed you.
Guys, this is my friend Ariel.
-STAN: We're honored
to be here with you.
-Hi.
How are you? I'm Joel.
-Nice to meet you.
-STAN: To Alfred.
-BILL: Alfred.
-(DISHES CLINKING)
(LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Hey. First Roll.
OTHERS: First Roll.
Take a bite and pass it across.
(BREAD CRUNCHING)
-BILL: There you go.
-(CLARA LAUGHING)
STAN: Whoa.
You're like a panther.
CLARA: Are we gonna get
to see you dance this weekend?
MORETTI: Don't fret, my dear.
I'm still uncoordinated.
(LAUGHTER)
STAN: Come on, Clara.
CLARA: What?
Nobody moves like Moretti.
(CHATTER CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
(BREAD CRUNCHING)
(UNEASY MUSIC PLAYING)
(BREAD CRUNCHING)
(QUIET MURMURING)
STAN: Oh. Thank you.
BILL: But it's a pretty one.
Indeed it is.
Yeah. Thought so.
Jorg, right?
Ariel Ecton. (CHUCKLES)
(CHUCKLES)
This is amazing.
(SIGHS) Um...
Full disclosure,
I'm a journalist here,
and we might be writing a piece
just about how amazing
all this is,
and, um, I just wanted to get,
like, a little bit
of background color,
if you're comfortable
talking to me a little.
I used to teach music
at Harden High School
in Charlotte.
One semester, I picked
my favorite musician...
The Wizard of Wiggle himself,
to be the primary focus
for the kids.
One day,
I'm teaching second period
when I get a phone call
saying that Moretti
wanted to meet me.
(CHUCKLING) And at first,
I thought it was a prank,
you know?
-Mmm.
-Of course.
No one had seen Moretti
in almost ten years.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
And then...
he got on the phone...
and that voice is...
...unmistakable.
-Like, this ain't no prank.
-(CHUCKLES)
That's the motherfucking
Debutante himself. (CHUCKLES)
Wait, so...
Moretti just, like,
called you out of the blue?
He told me not to tell anyone.
Did he say
what he wanted or... or...
(LAUGHING) What?
No need. No.
I didn't even tell my job.
No call, no show.
I... I was on a plane
the next morning.
(CHUCKLES)
And now, I teach music theory
to the children.
Like, uh, you know,
little Maudey there.
And John here, uh,
teaches phys ed,
like, uh, you know, like,
uh, track and archery.
"Teach them young,
and the world will be yours."
ARIEL: That's from the book,
right? The...
the... the blue one that's...
-Meditations of Level.
-ARIEL: Yeah.
Is that, um...
Sorry, I don't... I don't know
how else to ask that.
Are you...
-you guys...
-We're Levelists.
What do you, uh...
What is that, I guess,
to you or...
you all?
"The one and only holistic path
"to prevent the obstruction
of creativity
"and ensure the protection
of those divinely burdened
to wield it."
(FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
Doesn't "sycophant" have an "O"?
Probably, yeah. Um...
-Hi.
-Alfred Moretti.
Ariel Ecton.
-Indeed you are.
-(CHUCKLES)
I was shocked to get the invite,
but I'm truly honored
and thrilled
to get to be here this weekend.
I hope so.
-(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
-Don't forget the "O."
-Right. Yeah.
-Rest well.
ARIEL: You, too.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
Congratulations,
and welcome again
to this once-in-a-lifetime
gathering.
For your comfort,
we have assigned each of you
a 24-7 concierge.
If there are
any accommodations
that you may desire,
please do not hesitate
to ask them.
None too big, none too small.
Your concierge is here for you.
STAN: Holy shit,
the Moretti Museum.
-(LIGHT LAUGHTER)
-I can't believe it's real.
CLARA: Oh, the kids are doing
a puppet show.
I love puppet shows.
(EXHALING RHYTHMICALLY)
(RUMMAGING THROUGH BAG)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(SCOFFS, SIGHS)
(LOUD POPPING)
(GUM POPS LOUDLY)
(SIGHS)
MORETTI: (OVER TAPE PLAYER)
This song is titled
Tomorrow, my love.
Please enjoy.
(SLOW, MELANCHOLY INTRO PLAYING)
(SIGHS)
The last time
I fell in love
I was 16
A little ol' boy
With some big ol' dreams
Then she headed west
For this Hollywood thing
Love didn't work out
Like it seemed
I begged her to stay
But I had no means
Stood there
In my cowboy hat
And my favorite jeans
And every night at 8:00
She's on TV
But for me
Things didn't work out
Like they seemed
You deserve the best
And I'll miss you slow
'Cause life's
Moving faster
Faster than before
When we were young
We had time
Felt seconds last forever
But what I never knew
Was how much time
We'd have together
How much time
We'd have together
(SONG ENDS)
(SIGHS)
(DOOR OPENS)
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(FOOTSTEPS)
Hmm?
-Ow!
-MAN: There we go. Go.
BILL: Hey, what are you doing?
-MAN: Go ahead.
-(CREAKING)
(GRUNTING)
What are... No, let go of me!
(GRUNTING)
-MAN: That's it.
-(TOOL WHIRRING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING STOPS)
(BIRD CALLING)
(YAWNING)
Morning.
Good morning.
Can I get you anything?
No. I was just gonna
go for a jog.
(CHUCKLING)
I can go for a jog, right?
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
(SIGHS)
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
(BIRD CALLING)
-(FROG CROAKING)
-(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(ARIEL PANTING)
MORETTI: Morning.
ARIEL: Morning.
How are you finding
everything so far?
Good. Yeah.
How was your morning jog?
It was good.
I, um... I feel bad, though.
My concierge
had to jog with me
the whole time. (CHUCKLES)
You guys really go
above and beyond
with the service here.
Oh, that's the only thing
you find above and beyond?
The service?
Yeah. Um...
I mean, the song was amazing.
Like, genuinely. It was...
gorgeous and haunting
and kind of funny.
Funny? How?
It's just not really how
I picture your heart, I guess.
How did you picture my heart?
(CHUCKLES) Um...
I...
Like Teflon,
glitter-glazed and reinforced
with a shit ton of cash
and applause.
Pardon my French.
Well, don't stop Frenching
on my account, dear. Sit.
ARIEL: Um...
Really, though, I just...
I found it really impressive.
Thank you.
You're able to sing
about all that
like it was yesterday, and...
it was really kind of comforting
that you hadn't lost a step.
Thank you. Well, yes,
that would be a bummer.
(CHUCKLING) Yeah,
that'd be a huge bummer.
Hi, Ariel.
Um...
not to get all
Anderson Cooper on you
-first thing in the morning...
-Mmm-hmm.
...but, um, this place,
this, um...
religion, Level...
...how long ago was it
since you founded it?
Oh. (LAUGHING)
Oh, no. I didn't create it.
You think I wrote all that?
No, I'm just a simple songman.
It existed long before me.
But you are a member?
Yes, I'm very committed to it.
What is it that you guys do?
What do you mean, what do we do?
I mean, all religions
do something.
Catholics go to Mass.
They drink the blood of Christ.
Muslims, uh, pray towards Mecca.
You know, they...
they do things.
All religions have things
that they do together.
Um, then what do you call
a group that does
nothing together?
Congress.
(MORETTI LAUGHS)
Actually, you know what?
There... there is...
one thing we... we all do.
Would you like to see?
Yeah.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(CRACKING NEARBY)
(CRACKING CONTINUES)
(HUSHED) Sorry about the odor.
I wish that I could say
you get used to it,
but you don't.
Now, this believer is engaged
in a process we call Diving.
That's something
we're all called to do.
"We all," including yourself?
Absolutely.
ARIEL: So, you eat them?
For necklaces,
we source only natural pearls,
so that means
we're obligated to open
oyster after oyster after oyster
before we find one
with a pearl in it.
Well, in a hundred oysters,
how often do you find a pearl?
Not all that often,
but distilling it
into a chore of numbers
is beside the point.
Well, what's the point, then?
-(KNIFE SQUISHES)
-(MAN GRUNTING)
MAN: (SOFTLY) Oh, damn.
We should probably...
leave him to it,
let him concentrate.
(DOOR OPENS)
(CHUCKLES) Um...
forgive me if I'm missing
something, but...
what...
(CHUCKLING) What's the point
of that, exactly?
Well, the Meditations of Level
teaches us that the worth
of a single pearl
surpasses the value
of all empty shells
and that balance, true balance,
exists not in the notion
that all things are equal
but in the realization
that all things are not...
equal.
True balance?
Yes.
Like someone who would sleep
12 hours a day
and stay up for 12 hours,
for example.
MORETTI: Hmm.
Did you really buy and wear
Freddie Mercury's teeth?
(SHOWER RUNNING)
(SHOWER STOPS)
(KNOCKING)
Okay.
Hi.
Oh, hello.
It's so great
to finally meet you, Ariel.
Uh, it's nice
to meet you, too...
Rachel.
-Okay.
-Okay, um...
(RACHEL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY
TO STAFF)
Rachel. (CHUCKLES)
-Rachel, hi. Yeah.
-Hi.
What... what is all this?
Here.
Oh, beautiful. Option three,
with the olive foundation,
like we talked about
last week, okay?
-Okay.
-Thank you.
No, I... I got
one of these, actually.
Um... just, like, what is this?
Is this, like, the...
the spa experience or...
Right. Okay.
We're gonna make you look
like the best version of you.
Okay. Um...
What number?
Okay. Two dresses.
Let me ask you this.
Uh...
did you receive a call
out of the blue, maybe,
from Moretti a few years ago,
and that's what brought you
to this place?
I'm sorry, my dear,
the schedule.
Let us do what we do,
and I promise
you will look and feel
-like a million bucks.
-Yeah. Okay.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
Mmm. Mmm.
You have Pam Grier's
bone structure.
-Okay.
-Ooh, truly gorgeous.
Let's not get carried away, now.
Okay.
It's so weird.
You guys do fast work.
It's like, one day
you just look in the mirror
and you're both
of your parents, you're...
(ELECTRIC RAZOR BUZZING)
-(BUZZING STOPS)
-Okay, hon.
So, how's the lady garden?
Umm...
What? (CHUCKLES)
Your lady garden.
(CHUCKLES)
Your cha-cha.
Your vagina, my dear.
When was the last time
you shaved or waxed down there?
Uh, no, yeah,
I... I... I figured.
Um... (LAUGHS)
I don't know.
Uh, I... I... I don't...
I don't know why
it's any of your business.
It... it has been a... a minute.
That's good. That's good.
Moretti requires
that everyone be unshaven.
But what he actually means
is a full, tidy bush,
emphasis on "tidy."
We all do it, even the men.
(LAUGHS)
Does he have plans to...
to... to see...
I'm sure he doesn't.
I've worked on The Debutante
since before
the Cream Crush Tour.
He's had many impressive guests.
Icons, people who had holidays
named after them.
Football players,
Pulitzer Prize winners.
Everyone with 100% certainty
has gone through this process.
Okay, uh, sorry.
So, um, because
some famous, influential people
wanted to... to...
to spend time with Moretti,
they let you,
or whoever else, um...
shave them down there?
Hey, as Moretti always says,
"No one is more of a star fucker
"than the fucking stars."
(ELECTRIC RAZOR BUZZING)
I mean, has the man
ever told a joke
that's actually funny?
-Well...
-Hey.
-Hey.
-(GASPS) Wow, honey.
-You look gorgeous.
-(ARIEL CHUCKLES)
Doesn't she look gorgeous, Stan?
-STAN: No objection here.
-I mean, you guys look amazing.
I love your hair, Clara.
Well, it's a wig.
Yeah, she knows it's a wig,
Stan, you miserable ass.
And they put it on
a little bit too tight,
but other than that,
I think it looks fabulous on me.
It does. This is a look.
Um...
Sorry, did... did...
did your guys's concierges
stay with you all night?
-Yep.
-Yep.
And did they, um...
they shave you down...
-Uh-huh.
-Yeah.
Okay. Cool.
(LAUGHS) Fucking Moretti.
CLARA: Yeah.
(ARIEL CHUCKLES)
-ARIEL: Oh, hey.
-BIANCA: Hey.
-ARIEL: Hey.
-BIANCA: Hey.
EMILY: Ooh. Wow.
-Thank you.
-Wow.
-Bianca, look at this look.
-This is great.
-Stop.
-You look beautiful.
-I've never seen you
look like this.
-All right.
Shall we head
to the listening room?
Um... we're down one,
though, right?
Oh, yeah. Where is Bill?
Mr. Lotto opted for
a longer massage session.
He'll rejoin the group later.
(SCOFFS) Typical.
-Asshole.
-He's so indulgent.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(LIGHT LAUGHTER, QUIET CHATTER)
MORETTI: I'll only say this,
humanity has been in debt
ever since we found ourselves
on this tiny rock.
Every so often,
there is a Michelangelo
who paints a Sistine Chapel
or a Tina Turner
who covers Proud Mary,
and humanity chips away
at that debt.
Now, I'm not saying this album,
Caesar's Request,
will bring us into the black,
but you can bet your ass
it'll bring us closer to it.
(PULSING ELECTRONIC BEAT PLAYS)
(UPBEAT ELECTRIC GUITAR LINE
PLAYS OVER ELECTRONIC BEAT)
(GRUNTS)
Whoo, whoo.
Hey, babe
Look to me
The way you fall asleep
Tonight I pray
I'm in your dreams
Hey, crazy
Come to me
I love to play
The role of love
Girl, write me
In your scenes
Cameras, action
Fatal attraction
Encore, concords
Latest fashion
Girl, you sexy
And you know it
And you ain't afraid
To show it
I adore you
Bring your gifts
Bring your ass
Bring your lips
Bring me Venus
I'll bring you Mars
Bring the night
I'll bring the stars
I'll bring it all
All, all, all, all, all
35 millimeter
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Light, love, rogue
Live, bold, die
35 millimeter
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Walk, love, walk
Live, walk, die
35 millimeter
Hey, love
Hey, love
I come alive at night
Let's be alive tonight
Sweet soul
Pure soul
Bring a rise
Until I'm hypnotized
Borderlines get crossed
Put me in focus
Girl, I'm hopeless
Don't be camera-shy
Let's both defy this life
Put us on the screen
For everyone to see
Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh
Girl, you sexy
And you know it
And you ain't afraid
To show it
I adore you
Bring your gifts
Bring your ass
Bring your lips
Bring me Venus
I'll bring you Mars
Bring the night
I'll bring the stars
I'll bring it all
35 millimeter
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Light, love, rogue
Live, bold, die
35 millimeter
(VOICE DISTORTED)
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Walk, love, walk
(DISTORTED HOWLING)
Live, walk, die
Love
Live, die
(COUGHING)
(GASPING)
MORETTI: Can we cut
the music, please?
-Honey, are you all right?
-(SONG STOPS)
-Can we get her some water?
-(CLEARS THROAT, COUGHS)
It's probably a peanut allergy.
I swear, that entire generation
just woke up one day
with a peanut allergy.
-(COUGHS, GASPS)
-It might be
the altitude, actually.
Rachel, can we get her
an IV drip, maybe?
And also,
check with the kind folks
in the infirmary.
-Maybe give her a once-over.
-Just breathe, Emily.
You're... you're in great
hands with... with Rachel.
(EMILY COUGHS, CLEARS THROAT)
Don't worry.
I've had worse reviews.
(LAUGHTER)
MORETTI: Maybe let's all go
get some fresh air
and let the music decant
a little bit, shall we?
-Sure.
-Yeah?
Yeah.
MORETTI: Thank you. I'm honored.
It's just so inspiring.
-(CLARA GROANS)
-Hey. You good?
(CHUCKLING) Yeah.
I'm just trying to loosen it.
What's crazier,
the fact that Moretti
has changed his wardrobe
-six times
in the last two days...
-(CHUCKLES)
...or that he's still
the best entertainer
in the world?
-ARIEL: No, for sure, but--
-CLARA: Yeah.
This whole thing's a trip, man.
Him, this place, like...
The people here
are weirdly talented
and seem mostly happy.
Yeah.
The scars on the hands, though.
I don't know if I love that.
-Huh. I hadn't noticed.
-Yeah.
Um, you know Stan
pretty well, yeah?
Stan? Yeah.
How apeshit do you think he'd go
if I were to write
a secondary piece,
like, on the Levelists?
Here's the thing,
Stan is an asshole,
but if you have
a real story to tell,
not even he can deny that.
STAN: There's something
that unites them.
And I... I'm not quite sure
how to put it, but they...
they're all very different,
but there's something...
It's as if they're all
faces of the one.
MORETTI: Mmm-hm.
Well, you know, Level believes
God is a temporary
state of being
and that divinity
is accessible for all,
but soon fades away.
-STAN: Right.
-For... for instance,
when I created the bridge
-on Live Without Love...
-(STAN SIGHS)
...uh, in that moment,
I was a god.
-Capital "G" God.
-You were.
But only in the same way the...
the person who, uh,
created the horseshoe
thousands of years ago
was a god.
-That is
really fascinating, Alfred.
-Mmm.
Do you think that...
that that could be a little
bit alienating, though?
Just seeing as most people can't
and won't ever create something
truly perfect
in their lifetimes?
Actually, we believe
it's the exact opposite.
That anyone can be a god
at any moment.
The opportunity is there
for everyone,
from the boss
to the lowest on the masthead.
Yeah, it makes sense, right?
We are only vessels.
Some of us have the goods,
some of us don't.
(LAUGHS)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Thank you so much.
-So, what's the deal?
How's the note-taking coming?
-Uh...
No, it's good. It's good.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
I've been finding
a lot of really
fascinating stuff.
-Mmm-hmm.
-I was thinking, you know,
maybe I could write
some sort of secondary...
like, a... a companion piece
to yours.
-Secondary piece?
-Uh, yeah. Secondary,
completely secondary.
(WHISPERING)
Just on the Levelists.
Stan.
Be real with me.
This is a cult.
-(CHUCKLES) Well, yeah.
-Or damn well near one.
Like, this is insane.
Yeah. So?
So, I was talking to...
-to Jorg last night.
-Mmm-hmm.
The backstories
on the members...
They're all just
so fascinating.
I could just do a deep dive--
No, no, no, no.
Let me stop you. Stop, stop.
Let me stop you there.
We are publishing one story.
-(SCOFFS)
-And you're... you're playing
a... a vital role in it.
But, you know,
any and everything
that's interesting
about this place
will be in my story.
-Okay.
-Plus... plus...
the... the... the weird
groupies in blue,
the fucking vases,
god damn dancing,
none of that matters
because it's about the music.
-That's the story,
you know? I mean...
-(ARIEL GASPS)
(GROANING)
-Oh, my God. Stan.
-STAN: Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, somebody help!
-What happened?
-Have Charlan rush here.
-(HYPERVENTILATING)
-What happened?
-Now!
-Oh, my God. Take it out,
take it out, take it out.
-No!
-CLARA: Oh, my goodness!
-(SHUSHING)
-(STAN GROANING)
-Just breathe, just breathe.
-CLARA: What's going on?
-JORG: It looks like
it only hit his shoulder...
-What the fuck?
...but still hurry.
ARIEL: Just breathe,
just breathe, just breathe.
-BIANCA: Don't take it out.
-(STAN GROANING)
-Oh, my God.
-Oh, it's...
I'm so sorry, mister.
It was a mistake with my grip.
It slipped.
(STAN GROANING)
STAN: Oh, my God.
(GROANING CONTINUES)
STAN: Yes?
("DINA SIMONE" PLAYING
INSIDE ROOM)
Ariel. Come, have a drink.
Ariel.
We were just saying we...
we should call over to your room
and invite you over.
-We were just saying that.
-And here you are.
There's not a lot left,
but you look like
a lightweight, so...
Oh, I remember when I used
to look like a lightweight.
Well, we all remember
the '80s, Bianca.
-BIANCA: Fuck you.
-CLARA: Okay.
-STAN: Fuck you.
-CLARA: To Moretti...
-(MUSIC STOPS)
-...the best entertainer
in the world,
still the greatest of all time.
-No doubt.
-BIANCA: Moretti.
Ariel, what's wrong?
Oh, this better not be about
the fucking article.
I know that.
Stan, is it possible
that what happened to you
wasn't an accident?
-CLARA AND STAN: What?
-We're here,
in the middle
of fucking nowhere.
They took our cell phones.
They took our laptops.
We have no way
of communicating
with the outside world.
They're surveilling us,
watching us 24/7.
They're probably
fucking listening in
to this room somehow.
People are fucking missing.
-Let's not forget about that.
-What?
Are you sure
you haven't been drinking
with us?
-(LAUGHING)
-Because this is sounding
a little crazy.
-CLARA: Didn't wanna say it.
-STAN: Sorry.
Something is off.
Is this not alarming
to you at all?
Like, is it weird
or fucking strange
in the least bit?
It's less odd to me
that Bill Lotto's
pretentious ass
thinks that he's too good
to listen to the album
with the rest of us
than it is that
the Alfred Moretti
did all of this
to steal our cell phones
or something. I mean, come on.
I don't know
why he fucking did it.
You said that
they hated each other.
Oh, yeah, they hate each other
over something so silly.
Years ago,
Bill gave an interview
where he sort of
made fun of Moretti
for getting his Doberman
stuffed after it died.
-BIANCA: Oh, Tucker.
-STAN: That's right.
That's right. Tucker. (LAUGHS)
Oh. RIP.
And then, of course,
Moretti was shamed
a little bit
because everybody thought
it was kind of strange,
-because it's kind of strange.
-BIANCA: Mmm-hmm.
This just doesn't feel
fucking right at all to me.
STAN: Okay,
and that's why you're the one
just taking notes.
-Okay. (SCOFFS)
-CLARA: Just calm... Hold on.
-What is happening?
-I don't know. It's...
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(MORETTI SOBBING)
(LEVELISTS MURMURING)
(SOBBING CONTINUES)
The crowd...
the crowd is oh so upset.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
Upset that I'm not onstage.
LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The back row is half asleep.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But the front row
is ready to rage.
LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The drummer was an hour late.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
-He was in the back seat
of a groupie's car.
-LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The spotlight just blew out.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But my sarong,
it shines from afar.
LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The price of the ticket was low.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But we're booked
for another gig.
(CHEERING)
The microphone
is tiny and cheap.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But it makes my bulge
look big.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
MAN: Bravo!
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRD CALLING)
Ariel?
(KNOCKING)
(BELL TOLLING)
I love you all dearly.
I hope to see you soon.
(QUIET CHATTER)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(DOOR RATTLING)
(FLIES BUZZING)
(SCRATCHING RAPIDLY)
-(SCRATCHING CONTINUES)
-(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(GROANS IN FRUSTRATION)
(SCRATCHING CONTINUES)
-Whoa.
-RACHEL: Are you...
Are you okay?
Don't touch me. Don't touch me.
What's... what's wrong?
-Just, wait a minute.
-(CHUCKLES)
Let me explain, okay?
-I'm leaving.
-Ariel. Ariel.
Ariel!
(PANTING)
Ariel.
I need to leave.
Why? What... what happened?
What's wrong?
(CHUCKLES)
Uh, where's Bill Lotto?
Najee?
I would assume
he's getting dressed for dinner.
Wait, did Bill
do something to you?
No, just, where is he?
Where's... where's Emily Katz?
NAJEE: I just left her.
She's feeling much better
and will join us
at the children's show.
Oh. Okay.
MORETTI: Ariel, you...
Can't you tell me
exactly what happened?
You seemed just peachy
yesterday.
Um, no, I'm not, uh,
explaining anything.
Just, uh, I want to go.
I'm gonna go.
I am going now. I'm leaving.
I'm sorry, but that simply
isn't possible right now.
A few of the believers took
the Louise into town.
They should be back soon.
Okay, well,
what about one of those?
NAJEE: Those will
get you ten miles.
You'll have to walk
the other 40.
Okay. Well, we have to
figure something out,
'cause I gotta go.
This is the opportunity
of a lifetime.
If you're too ungrateful to--
Jorg.
(SCOFFS) Can't you see
she's frightened?
And it's obviously something
we did or didn't do,
so I would like to apologize
for that and assure you
that we will get you out of here
as soon as we can
possibly do so.
Najee, when is
the bus returning?
40 minutes, max.
I'll call them now.
MORETTI: In the meanwhile,
I want you to get a hold of Jeff
and deal with the plane.
Get it fueled up.
Make sure it's ready to go
the second we get Ariel
to the airport, okay?
-No argument, top priority.
-Yes, sir.
But what about the puppet show?
MORETTI: Well, she...
she has to leave,
so she... she'll miss it
this time.
But we worked so hard,
and you were supposed
to sit next to me.
It's not fair.
MORETTI: You know,
maybe we can do this.
If Ariel agrees,
the children's building
is the closest one
to the gate,
and she could stay
and watch the show
until the bus got here.
If you feel comfortable
with that.
I could see the entrance
from the building?
Like, I could see it?
(STAMMERS)
Cross my heart, hope to die.
(SCOFFS)
Yeah, fine.
-Yes!
-ARIEL: Okay.
Jorg, if you could...
Thank you.
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
STAN: (SOFTLY) Yeah.
(QUIET CHATTER)
(SIGHS)
(CHUCKLING)
CLARA: Cute.
MORETTI: All right, children.
Presenting
The Tragedy of Billie.
(APPLAUSE)
(SOMBER JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
(PUPPETS CHATTERING)
(PUPPETS LAUGHING)
(CHUCKLES)
(PUPPET CHATTER
AND LAUGHTER STOPS)
BILLIE HOLIDAY: Okay. I'm ready.
-(PUPPETS CLAMORING)
-PUPPETS: Lady Day!
Tell us, has the trauma
in your childhood
helped you make
such successful music?
Coming from where I'm from,
to be where I'm at now,
well, I guess that's
a sweet song in itself.
But I wouldn't wish
my childhood on anyone,
-even for success.
-Tell us about prison.
Did you perform any ditties
in the slammer?
Well, I'm no saint.
You already knew that.
And prison sure ain't
full of saints,
but neither is
the rest of the world.
Are you still on smack?
I'm very pleased to announce
that I'm 100% sober
as I stand here
and plan to finish my days
exactly that way.
I'm embarrassed and ashamed
of the mistakes
I've made in my past
and ask my fans and family
to forgive me
as best as they can.
I know I'm certainly trying to.
When did the weight gain start?
How do you feel about McKay
blowing your fortune?
Are you flat broke?
Reports say you're flat broke.
Billie, when will we hear
Strange Fruit again?
Do you think
a former prostitute
should be a role model?
Billie! Ms. Holiday!
(PUPPET REPORTERS CLAMORING)
PUPPET REPORTERS:
Billie! Ms. Holiday!
PUPPET REPORTERS: Lady Day!
(PUPPET REPORTERS LAUGHING)
Something moved.
Something moved.
What... what the fuck is that?
(GASPS)
-What the fuck?
-Oh, my God.
STAN: Jesus.
STAN: Is... is this
some kind of joke?
-CLARA: What?
-STAN: Is there some...
someone in there?
Oh, fuck. Oh, my God.
What the fuck?
Jesus Christ.
(EMILY GROANING)
CLARA: Oh, my God.
-STAN: Em?
-(EMILY WHIMPERING)
-BIANCA: Oh, my God.
-NAJEE: Time to go, children.
STAN: What the fuck
is wrong with her?
(EMILY GRUNTING, WHIMPERING)
Um, I promised
I would be an open book,
and welshing ain't cute.
Well done, kids.
Very... very charming.
Uh, so I'll try and explain.
Whatever chemical compound
she ingested,
uh...
Sorry, science is a bit of
a "blah, blah, blah" to me.
Suffice it to say
that whatever
is wet inside her body
is rapidly expanding.
Is... is that
more or less accurate?
-More or less.
-MORETTI: You see?
Wonders happen
when we follow the science.
Wouldn't you say, dear?
(EMILY GASPING)
STAN: Don't...
What the fuck are you doing?
-CLARA: Oh, my God.
Don't touch her.
-STAN: Jesus.
-(ALL GROANING)
-(EMILY GRUNTS)
-(ALL GASPING)
-STAN: Jesus Christ.
-MORETTI: Jorg, please.
-STAN: He's fucking insane.
-MORETTI: A towel.
-Move.
Move, you motherfuckers!
No! Let me go!
-Get off of me!
-(GRUNTING)
-LEVELIST: Nobody leaves!
-BIANCA: I wanna go.
Let me go.
-Stay down.
-Okay.
-Fuck! Look at that.
-(STAN SOBBING)
I mean, will you look at that?
Why is it
that waterproof foundation
is never truly waterproof?
-Why?
-(MUFFLED GRUNTING)
JORG: Great question.
MORETTI: And, you know, I...
I must say something,
I'm afraid.
-(CLARA SOBBING)
-Um... (SNIFFS)
(CLARA MUTTERING)
MORETTI: Many of us here
have worked
very hard to make this
a once-in-a-lifetime event,
and I find that
all of you are being
very, very disruptive.
-(GASPING, CRYING)
-MORETTI: Excuse... excuse me.
-That's dramatic.
-CLARA: (CRYING) Let me go.
I just wanna go.
Excuse me. That's dramatic.
Now, may we finally begin
the Q and A
to discuss Caesar's Request?
(YELLING)
(PANICKED SCREAMING)
NAJEE: Hey, hey, hey!
(WHIMPERING, SCREAMING)
LEVELIST: Sit!
-BIANCA: Oh, my God.
-(WHIMPERING, SCREAMING)
BIANCA: Oh!
(CLARA SCREAMING)
STAN: Jesus Christ.
(SCREAMING)
MORETTI: Shut her up!
(SCREAMING STOPS)
(STAN GROANING)
(CLARA GASPING)
-LEVELIST: Sit her up.
-MORETTI: Intermission
is finished.
(BREATH TREMBLING)
What the fuck is this?
"What the fuck is this?"
That's what you said?
"What the fuck is this?"
So, the first question
of my first interview
in 30 years is,
"What the fuck is this?"
(SIGHS)
You know, I... I think
I could do better on my own,
-so let's give it a try.
-(FEEDBACK SQUEALS)
(IMITATING VALLEY GIRL)
Uh, Mr. Alfred Moretti.
Question mark.
Why did you
name your new album,
like, Caesar's Request?
(IN NORMAL VOICE)
Thank you for the question.
And thank you, Billie,
for the invite.
Well, it's an interesting story.
One day,
while summering on the Cape,
I was engrossed by an account
of the time that
Julius Caesar was kidnapped.
Now, does anyone here
happen to know
who kidnapped Julius Caesar?
(FEEDBACK SQUEALS)
(SOFTLY) Pirates.
Pirates.
From the mouths of babes.
You're absolutely right,
Ariel Ecton.
Now, let me ask you,
uh, do you happen to know
how Julius Caesar responded
once he'd been freed?
He went back with his army.
MORETTI: To do what?
Don't disappoint us, now.
He killed all of his kidnappers.
MORETTI: Um,
he crucified them, actually.
Every single one of them.
No hyperbole,
no foundational myth
about a man walking on water.
Just simple, actual
crucifixion for all of them.
Now tell me, teacher's pet,
on whom I'm about to place
a big, big bet...
what's the best part
of the story?
(SOFTLY) Um...
-(ARIEL SHUDDERING)
-Well, the best part
of the story is that
the pirates who kidnapped
the Julius Caesar
thought he was
a commoner. (CHUCKLES)
They thought
they were his equal.
And because
of this misconception,
they asked the same ransom
for Julius Caesar
that they would've asked
for any Joe Schmo Roman.
And this meant that
Caesar was obligated
to demand a raise in his ransom
so that it would be commensurate
with his position.
And what does that tell us?
Well...
(WHISPERING)
It tells us that royalty,
even when at the mercy
of peasants,
is still royalty, doesn't it?
Doesn't it?
(IN NORMAL VOICE) Now,
what about that story, kids?
And how about that puppet show?
(LAUGHING)
The Tragedy of Billie.
I think that interview
went rather well.
-JORG: Wonderful,
wonderful interview.
-BIANCA: No.
(CRYING) Please, please.
-Please let me go.
-BIANCA: Stan.
Please. Please.
-No, no, please.
-(CLARA WHIMPERS)
(CRYING) I'm sorry.
Please.
(GROANS)
BIANCA: (CRYING) Stan. No.
(STAN GRUNTING)
-(GRUNTING)
-(BIANCA GROANING)
-(KNIFE STABBING REPEATEDLY)
-(BELLE GRUNTING)
Belle.
(STABBING CONTINUES)
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
Baby Jane, I lost my nerve
Hear my heart
Please ignore my words
We jumped the broom
That was the best of days
(STAN GROANS)
Since we broke up
I've been in a daze
Baby Jane
Please don't take the cat
(GRUNTING VICIOUSLY)
("BABY JANE"
CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
RECORDED VOICE: Welcome
to the Rhinestone Chalet,
Moretti's childhood home
turned interactive museum.
Did you know
that Alfred's roots
come from Peoria, Illinois?
...feel to you until that day.
I mean, until that moment.
-(STABBING CONTINUES)
-(BELLE GRUNTING VICIOUSLY)
-(DOORKNOB RATTLING)
-LEVELIST: Circle back around.
(DOOR CREAKING SHUT)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(BIRD CALLING)
So jealous.
(BREATHING WEAKLY)
(BREATHING STOPS)
(CHIMES TINKLING)
You're still pretty.
(BIRDS CALLING)
(CLATTERING DOWNSTAIRS)
(DOOR CREAKING)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(DOOR RATTLING)
(RATTLING STOPS)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(FOOTSTEPS FADING IN DISTANCE)
(GRUNTING)
(STRAINING)
(SCREWDRIVER CLATTERS ON FLOOR)
-(CLATTERING)
-(PAINED GRUNTING)
(LOUD THUD)
(GRUNTING AND CLATTERING STOPS)
(DISTORTED VOICES
SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
MORETTI: ...sacrifice of
our beautiful creation.
See, we can't, uh,
un-paint a canvas
or un-play a chord.
And if a mistake has been made,
either yours or someone else's,
the only way to rectify it
is to make something beautiful.
Now, I've studied
at every temple of taste
in the entire world.
I've picked over
every reliquary that exists.
But I've never seen anything
as beautiful as you pearls.
We don't know
what tomorrow will bring.
Maybe we'll all be together...
(ARIEL SHUDDERING)
(MORETTI CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
(RACHEL SHUSHING)
Listen to me.
When you get to the gate,
make a right, okay?
(SHUSHES)
And then, go until you see
the light, all right?
But let's hope
it's something beautiful.
To our time in the sand.
LEVELISTS: To our time
in the sand.
Push me.
Cheers.
(WHISPERS) Cheers.
(ARIEL GRUNTING)
-(GROANING)
-(LEVELISTS SCREAMING)
(MORETTI GASPING FRANTICALLY)
(MORETTI WHIMPERING)
-(WHIMPERING CONTINUES)
-(ATV ENGINE REVVING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
(GRUNTING)
(GROANS)
(YELPS)
(PANTING)
-Hey.
-(TAPPING ON WINDOW)
Help, help, help!
-Who are you?
-I was in the house.
I was there,
and people are dead,
and we have to go.
-LEE: You were in there?
-Yes, I was in there.
Holy shit, you're bleeding.
Are you hurt?
-Yes, I am hurt!
-Is Moretti hurt?
Yes, he's hurt,
so we have to go.
-You met Moretti?
-We have to leave.
LEE: Wait, did he do the wiggle?
I bet he did the wiggle.
Did you hear
the new song... (GROANS)
ARIEL: I'm so sorry!
-(LEE COUGHING)
-(ENGINE STARTS)
(LEE GROANING)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(ENTRY BELL JINGLING)
(CASH REGISTER BEEPING)
INTERVIEWER: Do you think
about why that Levelist
helped you escape that night?
Or do you mentally try not
to go back to that time?
(CLICKS TONGUE, SIGHS)
Maybe a mix of both.
I don't know.
I'm... This is, like,
my millionth interview
this month,
so you have to forgive me.
Book tours are...
BOTH: Exhausting.
-Yeah, exhausting.
-(LAUGHING) Yes, I'm tired.
So, you know I gotta ask...
Is that how it really happened
when you went back
to the compound?
It's... it's exactly
as I wrote it.
-(BIRDS CHIRPING)
-(SIRENS WAILING)
(PIANO PLAYING GENTLE MELODY)
INTERVIEWER:
And he was actually
just sitting there alone,
still in the white suit,
playing the piano?
I do feel like I've said this
a million times at this point,
but it was, uh, surreal.
Cops haven't been able to
locate a single Levelist body.
They still haven't found
the fan who was at the gate.
-Just nothing.
-Hmm.
-(PHONE BUZZING)
-Um, sorry.
-Do you mind if I...
-Oh, yeah.
Thanks.
Hello? This is Ariel Ecton.
Ariel. Guess who.
It's Soledad Yusef
calling from sunny
Malibu, California.
And how do you find yourself
this Monday morning?
My love? Hello?
-What do you want?
-Ooh. Someone's spicy
this morning.
But I believe it's more
of what you want.
Didn't you send in
six interview requests
to sit down with Mr. Moretti
for your novel?
Well, you're in luck.
Mr. Moretti would like
to sit down this evening
at the high-risk
state hospital in Reno.
It's like a medieval torture
chamber, if you ask me.
Honestly, these states
should be tried for the way
they treat people.
It's just absolutely abhorrent.
ARIEL: Soledad, you are aware
that your client,
Alfred Moretti,
pled guilty to the murder
of five innocent people,
tried to kill me,
and is suspected
of leading hundreds
of Levelists to mass suicide?
He's passionate.
Ciao, my darling.
Take care of yourself.
(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)
(CELL DOOR BUZZING)
(DOOR CLANGS SHUT)
Salutations, as they say.
Oh, heavy.
Shall we get started?
(BEEPS)
Python.
-Excuse me?
-Well, in your novel,
you wrote that when...
the first day we met
that I was wearing
cream-colored alligator boots,
but in fact, they were
smoke-colored python boots.
Now, of course,
that's an easy mistake to make
for an untrained eye,
but, uh, I would never.
It's unimaginable--
In my "novel," you said?
In my 320-page non-fiction text,
your biggest gripe is with
the material of your boots?
You know, it's just, a little
constructive criticism
never killed anyone, Ariel.
Okay. (SCOFFS)
-(RECORDER BEEPS)
-Um...
I didn't expect you
to be remorseful
like a normal person,
but I came here
to try to report the truth
so that there's closure
for the families and--
(WHISPERS)
And to sell a few more books.
-Well...
-Ariel, while you circle
around and around
the one question
that you most assuredly
came here to ask me...
Very quickly...
Primitive man chose their leader
in the same way that
animals chose their leader...
uh, brute strength.
Yeah, I... I'm familiar
with Darwin's theory.
Uh, what does that have to do
with you being a murderer?
Man evolved.
Humanity evolved.
Um, it, uh, created government
and rules and law.
And with those things,
then the criteria
for what was needed
in a leader changed.
So, it went from this
to left brain.
To be president,
you have to go
to an Ivy League school
and get a little Ivy League
law degree
to signal to the rest of us,
the peons,
uh, that this is
the smart person.
But look at where we are.
Today's world is burning,
literally.
Illiteracy is at its highest.
We've never been more divided.
We have permanent war,
and the list goes on.
So, clearly, the metric,
this left-brain metric,
failed miserably.
But there is an answer.
A new evolution.
So, won't be this anymore
or this left brain
but this right brain
where the most creative
are in charge.
Look, I'm not just gonna
sit here and act like
I didn't find Stan's old article
where he referred to Tilt
as overrated,
Bianca's rather unflattering
paparazzi shots.
Not good. Not too pretty.
And let's not forget Clara's
digs about your bald head.
And even you can't
wiggle your way free
after murdering
hundreds of people.
I didn't murder
hundreds of people.
You didn't murder Stan Sullivan,
Clara Armstrong,
Bianca Tyson,
Emily Katz, and Bill Lotto?
Oh, yeah, I murdered them.
You should know
your masterpiece, Ariel,
is also the introduction
to our story.
No one will condone murder.
But if it's scandalous enough,
they'll never stop
talking about it.
Besides, you're not gonna stop
becoming Catholic
'cause you read a book
about the Crusades.
You're serving a life sentence
five times over.
Why not just tell us
where the bodies are?
Where are the Levelists?
Around.
We're spread out,
but still connected
to teach the young
and sprout new chapters,
to preserve dying crafts,
to inspire and comfort,
to fan the flames
of raw enthusiasm,
to closely monitor those
who obstruct
the divinely burdened.
Not hiding but waiting.
Waiting to better tomorrow.
So, what was in
the champagne glasses, then?
-Champagne.
-(ARIEL SIGHS)
-Okay.
-MORETTI: Oh.
With talent comes forgiveness.
The bigger the talent,
the more complete
the forgiveness.
Level will grow and grow.
We just, uh... (SIGHS, CHUCKLES)
needed someone
to get the ball rolling.
(SOFTLY) So, um...
Come on. You get it.
(SCOFFS)
So, why me?
Disco.
Two reasons, really.
One for us, one for me.
For us, we felt
you were a pure vessel,
completely uncorrupted
by success,
uncorrupted by cheap shots
for clicks.
For me, while looking
through your background,
I read a story you'd written
about a school board lady.
-Remember that?
-ARIEL: Carol Reggo?
That piece was less
than 500 words. It was before
I was even at J.
You wrote that her chin was
"delightfully inconspicuous."
And I needed my chin
in good hands.
(MOUTHING)
TV HOST: Once in a generation,
a tragedy so compelling occurs,
it grabs the entire world's
attention.
Most people
condemn the horrific events
that took place a few years ago,
while a growing minority
sympathize with
the guilty party.
After all, Caesar's Request
has sold millions of copies
since its release.
But the one thing
we can all agree on...
Our next guest is a star.
Her new book
was an instant bestseller,
but unless
you've been living on Mars,
you already know that.
Ms. Ecton, good morning.
Congratulations.
I'm so thrilled to be
sitting down with you today.
I mean, Our Time in the Sand
is such a daring,
beautiful novel.
What does it feel like
to have written the book
that everybody's talking about?
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
(WHISPERING) Ms. Ecton?
( "DLZ" BY TV ON THE RADIO
PLAYING)
Congratulations on the mess
You made of things
I'm trying to reconstruct
The air and all that brings
And oxidation is
The compromise you own
But this is beginning
To feel
Like the dog wants a bone
Say
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
You force your fire and then
You falsify your deeds
Your methods dot
The disconnect
From all your creeds
And fortune strives to fill
The vacuum that it feeds
But this is beginning
To feel
Like the dog's lost a lead
Say
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
This is beginning
To feel like
The long-winded blues
Of the never
This is beginning
To feel like
It's curling up slowly
And finding a throat
To choke
This is beginning
To feel like
The long-winded blues
Of the never
Barely controlled
Locomotive
Consuming the picture and
Blowing the crows, the smoke
This is beginning
To feel like
The long-winded blues
Of the never
Static explosion devoted
To crushing the broken
And shoving their souls
To ghost
Eternalized, objectified
You set your sights so high
But this is beginning
To feel like
The bolt busted loose
From the lever
Never mind,
Death professor
Your structure's fine
My dust is better
Your victim flies so high
All to catch a bird's-eye
View of who's next
Never you mind
Death professor
Love is life
My love is better
Your victim flies so high
Eyes could be the diamonds
Confused with who's next
Never you mind
Death professor
Your shocks are fine
My struts are better
Your fiction flies so high
Y'all could use a doctor
Who's sick, who's next?
Never you mind
Death professor
Electrified
My love is better
It's crystallized, so am I
All could be the diamond
Fused with who's next
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn
Of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
(SONG ENDS)
(ROCK BAND PLAYING GENTLE INTRO)
(CROWD CHEERING FAINTLY)
(ELECTRIC GUITAR PLAYING
MELLOW SOLO)
(CHEERING CONTINUES)
(CHEERING GROWS LOUDER)
Tamra is a legend.
Yeah, yeah, she's had two
hitless albums back-to-back,
but someone else's take
isn't the ticket.
We need hers.
We need someone who can
get her to actually open up
and be honest.
Somebody who can
get her to say something
brutal or cocky,
whatever it actually is.
What does she still want
from music?
What does she still think was,
you know, missing
from that last project?
The only thing a story
about a legend like Tamra Camden
is missing
is as much Tamra Camden
as possible.
STAN: Damn good point, Ariel.
-(MURMURS OF AGREEMENT)
-I'd read that.
(CHUCKLES) Thank you.
Uh, I mean,
I would love to maybe--
What about Chris Wreath
to write it?
I mean, he would be
inspired, right?
Yeah, strong agree.
I'll send him a note.
Done.
Okay. Good job.
(PAPERS SHUFFLING)
Moving on. (SIGHS)
On to the M.O.B.
(PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING)
ARIEL: It's just driving me
fucking nuts.
I've been there for three years.
Three years of my life,
and I haven't written
a single real story.
-Yes, you have.
-No, I haven't.
What are you talking about?
I loved that piece on that,
uh... What was it?
Blind martial arts instructor.
-Oh, yeah, okay.
-How'd he do
that three-finger thing?
-Oh. Like...
-It was like...
(BOTH GRUNTING FIERCELY)
(BOTH LAUGHING)
-Wow, you look cute today.
-Stop. (GROANS)
-Okay.
-Okay.
This is how I see it.
Step one,
write about famous people
because they're
inherently fascinating.
That's where I'm at right now.
-Step two...
-"Famous people."
Okay. Step two,
people start
to find me fascinating
'cause I'm writing
about fascinating people.
And then, three,
take that goodwill and use it
to write whatever
the fuck I want.
What's the...
what's the end goal
of all that, though?
Like, what's the point?
-Write a book. Like...
-Mmm.
Books, plural.
Then, show people that...
I don't know...
that I'm a good fucking writer.
Show them what I... I think
and... and...
and feel, love, hate.
But at this rate,
I'll be, like, 35
before that ever happens,
which is basically 40.
Sorry, no offense.
Whoa, hold up. I'm...
I... I'm only 32.
-What the hell?
-I'm like... I rounded up.
-That's wack.
-That's my fault.
-I... I rounded up.
-Okay, also,
is this one of those vents
where you just need to vent
or one of the rare vents
where you actually
want advice?
Wow. Okay.
The former. Right.
Can you pass me the...
I am open.
I will take advice. I'm open.
-For real?
-Yeah, for real.
Okay.
Well, with love and compassion,
I don't think anyone gives
a fuck about what you feel
or love or hate.
Listen,
you're only 27 years old.
You didn't grow up poor or rich.
You have a good job,
a perfect bill of health.
No addictions, no enemies.
Hell, you've never let
anyone in close enough,
present company included,
to actually break your heart.
And your parents are perfect,
which is why you always
shit on my mom.
No, I always shit on your mom
'cause she's fucking crazy.
Your problem is that
you're middle.
Which is okay. Most people are.
But it's experience
that gives people perspective,
and it's perspective
that gives opinions their value,
and yours is...
it's middle as fuck.
Okay.
(SIGHS)
This eel is delicious,
by the way.
Yeah, it's really good.
No, it's really, really good.
-Are you okay?
-(MUTTERS)
'Cause I could...
I could take that back.
The eel is really good.
-(PHONES RINGING)
-(BUSY CHATTER)
EDITOR 1: So...
EDITOR 2: I mean,
now is the time, then.
EDITOR 1: But why?
Why is now the time?
EDITOR 2: I mean,
all the pictures
are dropping in.
Like, do you think
he had a ton of work
done to his face?
Probably, but I'm calling
bullshit on the whole thing.
What's up?
There's a rumor flying around
that Moretti's back.
Like, "Moretti" Moretti?
Oh, shit.
I know. It's a big day for me.
Dina Simone
was my first ringtone.
Dina Simone was everyone's
first ringtone.
Well, don't be a dick.
Ooh, Stan.
You hear?
(SING-SONGY) Moretti's back.
-STAN: Oh, my God. You, too?
-(LAUGHS) I...
Are we done? Huh?
I mean, if social media
wants to freak out
over every rumor,
so be it, but you guys
are supposed to be journalists.
Besides, no one
has seen or heard from Moretti
in 30 years.
If there was an album,
I am sure they'd release it
the same way he always did.
Uh, his publicist,
Soledad Yusef,
would mail in a VHS of him
nonsensically just rattling off
Moretti's career highlights
and proclaiming that
a new album was on the way.
It was nauseating.
-Look at this.
-What's this?
SOLEDAD: (OVER COMPUTER)
Hello, my loves.
Hello.
STAN: Holy shit,
that's actually him.
It's been a long time
since we've done this dance.
(STAN WHISTLES, CHUCKLES)
But I think this dance we do
is a timeless one. Don't you?
(STAN LAUGHS)
SOLEDAD: A lot has changed
in the last 27 years.
Oh, my God.
Can you believe
it's been 27 years?
Look at me.
I'm like a silver fox. (LAUGHS)
Okay. I'm having too much fun.
-Enough about me.
-(STAN CHUCKLES)
What about him? What about him?
Mr. Glam-boyant himself.
The Velvet Caller. Don Diva.
The Wizard of Wiggle.
The icon responsible
for the highest-grossing
world tour in history.
The only living artist to
secure 38 number one singles.
Yes. Yes.
It is with... Ooh!
Unmitigated joy
that I announce to you,
my babies,
he's bringing you a gift.
(SIGHS)
The greatest album
of modern times.
(SCOFFS)
Future times, all times, really.
And, in typical
Debutante fashion,
he'll be playing for a select
group of people this weekend
before he gives this
new blessing unto the world.
And there is more to come.
So much more.
Such a sweet little thing
Dina
And you deserve
Million-dollar rings
Simone
I like
Your tight little jeans
Dina
And I love how
She dress like a saint
(SINGING ALONG)
Simone
Hold me, baby
Hold me tight
Kiss me, girl
It's Saturday night
...Alfred Moretti.
See me watching
Paint the town
She's with us
Queens and Crown
All I want is you
And diamonds on me
Ooh, don't you ever
Show me mercy, ooh
I'm here alone
With reservations for three
I need you
You too, perfect, yeah
Such a sweet little thing
Dina
And you deserve
Million-dollar rings
Simone
I like
Your tight little jeans
Dina
And I love how
She dress like a saint
Simone
You chauffeur 'round
All around the town
In Cadillac Sedan de Villes
And sex
Is your favorite thing
Cocaine and blue pills
You, club
You, ballet
She, in the bedroom
Her right here
In the valet
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Bodies intertwine
In the dark lights
Our souls
Oh, shit.
Exchange under
The night sky
Raging bulls
Till we fall asleep
The sun is coming for us
Jealousy
Such a sweet little thing
Dina
And you deserve
Million-dollar rings
Simone
-(SONG ENDS)
-He's back, my babies.
(LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Ugh. Classic.
Truly a perfect album,
up there with Thriller,
Hotel California, Nebraska.
WOMAN: There's a second one.
This is for, uh...
Ariel Ecton.
-WOMAN: Who?
-MAN: Seriously?
(OTHERS MURMURING)
CLARA: (OVER TV)
So, what do you think
of the news of Moretti
coming out of retirement?
WOMAN: (OVER TV) Oh, my gosh,
I mean, it feels like a dream,
you know?
I used to listen to him
all the time as a kid,
and now my kids
get their own Moretti album.
(LAUGHING)
And you, sir?
Moretti sleeps 12 hours a day,
and then stands 12 hours a day.
Like, it's
a "balance of life" thing.
This is my favorite rumor
about this guy.
Somebody's trying to suggest
that he bought
Freddie Mercury's teeth.
(LAUGHS)
-And he might--
-Today's top story,
Alfred Moretti,
arguably the biggest pop star
of the '90s,
has resurfaced
after a 30-year hiat...
(CHUCKLES)
(ENTHRALLING MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRDS CALLING)
STAN: Smell that desert air.
ARIEL: Oh, yeah, it's amazing.
-STAN: Right? Oh.
-ARIEL: Hello.
-Hello. Oh, okay. Okay.
-ARIEL: Oh. (CLEARS THROAT)
Ms. Ecton. Mr. Sullivan.
Welcome to Green River, Utah.
It'll be an absolute honor
to spend this weekend with you.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
Namaste.
Uh, the other guests
are waiting just this way.
Please follow me as we board
the infamous Louise.
Holy shit.
Slow Lo.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
So, uh, rumor had it
that when Moretti toured,
his outfits were
so damn heavy that the--
Yeah, they would
weigh the bus down,
and they would have to,
uh, stop to fuel twice as much
'cause it was so slow and low.
-Hence the name.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
ARIEL: I just...
I did a little research.
STAN: No, that's impressive.
That's really impressive.
-ARIEL: Thanks.
-STAN: Yeah. Nice job, rookie.
ARIEL: Okay.
-(ENGINE STARTS)
-Well, lookie here.
-Hey. Long time, huh?
-(LAUGHS)
-(LAUGHING)
-CLARA: Hey.
Oh, everybody, uh, meet Ariel.
Some young blood from
the magazine tagging along.
-Hi.
-This is Clara,
who you know of, I'm sure.
And, of course, Bianca Tyson,
the top paparazza in the game.
-Stan.
-(STAN LAUGHS)
-Clara. Clara.
-Stan.
-CLARA: Stan.
-(STAN AND CLARA LAUGH)
STAN: I see you, uh,
took a break from being
the most hated sex symbol on TV
to join us.
Key words, "sex symbol..."
Thank you... And "TV."
How's print media treating you?
Oh.
-Nice to meet you, dear.
-Oh, nice to meet you.
STAN: I'm not sure who that is.
That is Emily Katz.
-She's an influencer.
-STAN: Oh, Lord help us.
Wait, sorry.
Is she talking to Bill Lotto?
BIANCA: Oh, I know, right?
You'd think some of the sheen
would wear off after he pivoted
to podcasts.
I'm surprised he even came,
to be honest.
What do you mean?
Why would he miss
the event of the century?
They hated each other.
Ladies and gentlemen,
we are about to depart
on our
four-hour-and-eight-minute
journey.
Please feel free to luxuriate
until our arrival.
CLARA: Thank you.
(LAUGHS)
(BRAKES HISSING,
ENGINE ACCELERATING)
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
Oh, my God. Cindy Crawford
is such a legend.
She's my favorite
of his girlfriends.
CLARA: Oh, that is sexy.
(LAUGHING) What are they doing?
Stan, have you been
reading this?
Hmm?
Oh, it's from the basket, right?
I haven't. What's the haps?
I mean, the haps are very,
uh, specific. They...
Hey, so this is a good time
to establish our game plan.
Oh. Yeah.
Okay. Yes, actually.
I was, uh, writing
some stuff down earlier.
-Great.
-Yeah.
So, you know, obviously,
I'll be the one
who writes the review
and the piece,
but what I could
really use your help with
is some note-taking.
Okay. Yeah, um, I... I would...
-You know, I could share--
-Nah, just the note-taking.
Anything you see.
Weird books or, uh,
I don't know, orgies, whatever.
Just, uh, write it down,
and I'll give it a look
at the end of the weekend.
Got it?
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
(STAN INHALES DEEPLY)
You know, I'm...
I'm really happy for you.
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
(WIND WHISTLING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(EXCITED SHOUTING)
Who are these people?
Moretti diehards.
They've been congregating
since the announcement.
I even heard a few have been
sleeping in their cars.
All hoping to get
a glimpse of him.
Some people really need a hobby.
(EMILY CHUCKLES)
(CHEERING)
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
FAN: I love you!
(BIRDS CALLING)
(ENTHRALLING MUSIC PLAYING)
CLARA: Oh, thanks, honey.
I mean, had to wear
the boots, right?
-JORG: Right this way.
-STAN: They look perfect.
-CLARA: Thanks.
-STAN: Oh, my goodness.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(CLARA LAUGHS)
Welcome.
Before you head
to your respective rooms
to freshen up,
to ensure
the integrity of this event,
deposit your cell phones here.
We will return them Sunday
after your experience is over.
CLARA: No problem.
STAN: Thank you.
-(STAN SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
-(CLARA LAUGHING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Hey.
Ms. Katz. (CLEARS THROAT)
(CELL PHONE DROPS IN BASKET)
Thank you.
This is a gift.
-STAN: Oh.
-CLARA: Thank you.
WOMAN: Welcome, Ms. Ecton.
CLARA: It's beautiful.
-STAN: (WHISPERS) Ariel.
-I'm gonna put this by my Emmy.
-(STAN MOUTHING)
-Okay.
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
(QUIET, INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(BIRDS CHIRPING, CAWING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(DOOR OPENS)
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
(DOOR CLOSES)
Over the years,
my concerts attracted
a, uh, veritable who's who
of the revered
and the beatified.
And after every show,
it was customary
for me to invite some of them
backstage to my green room
to take photos
and exchange pleasantries.
And, one night,
I had the unbelievable honor
to welcome both Chuck Norris
and Muhammad Ali.
And as is always the case
when two alpha males enter
the same space,
a competition ensued.
And soon enough,
Chuck Norris stood up
and announced that his hands
were so fast
that he could chop
a mosquito in half.
And just as he had finished
that sentence...
Hi-ya!
-(MURMURING, CHUCKLING)
-I looked down at the floor,
and sure enough,
there's a mosquito
chopped in half.
Ali doesn't skip a beat.
He stands up,
goes to the center of the room,
kind of leans back a bit.
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
Double-jabs it.
I look down on the floor,
and there is a mosquito
chopped into four tiny bits.
The entire room applauds.
But Chuck Norris,
very determined,
does not give up.
He reclaims
the center of the room.
Locates one, and then...
(GRUNTING FIERCELY)
(SCATTERED LAUGHTER)
I look down, and sure enough,
there lay a little bloodsucker
cut into six tiny portions.
And Ali, cool as a cucumber,
he stands,
scouring the room,
locates a mosquito.
-Whack.
-(CLARA CHUCKLES)
I look up, and that mosquito
is still airborne.
I say, "Ali, champ,
"that mosquito is still
flying around."
Ali turns back to me,
and he says,
"Yeah, he's still flying around,
"but he'll never have children."
(LAUGHTER)
And so,
let me be the first
to congratulate all of you
on being the first to hear
my 18th studio album,
Caesar's Request.
(APPLAUSE)
Let's dine, shall we?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
-Hi. It's so nice
to finally meet you.
-Pleasure.
(CHATTER CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
-It's good to see you.
-You, too.
-Alfred.
-Young man.
-Mmm.
-Pleasure.
I'd like to start off
by saying...
-Water under the bridge.
-Exactly.
(CHATTER CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
-BILL: You look good, man.
-MORETTI: You look good, too.
Not as good as me.
-Oh.
-Thanks, Ariel.
Hey. I heard
you're from New York City.
-Is that true?
-Uh, yes, it is true.
That's so cool.
-Thanks.
-I like your hair.
I like your hair, too.
Uh, my name's Ariel.
Nice to meet you, Ariel.
-I'm Maude.
-Nice to meet you, Maude.
Would you like to sit
with me, Ariel?
Yes.
Yes, I would.
(GLASS CLINKING)
STAN: Now a toast, if I may.
Because this, my old friend,
does not happen anymore.
This, we have missed,
as we have missed you.
Guys, this is my friend Ariel.
-STAN: We're honored
to be here with you.
-Hi.
How are you? I'm Joel.
-Nice to meet you.
-STAN: To Alfred.
-BILL: Alfred.
-(DISHES CLINKING)
(LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Hey. First Roll.
OTHERS: First Roll.
Take a bite and pass it across.
(BREAD CRUNCHING)
-BILL: There you go.
-(CLARA LAUGHING)
STAN: Whoa.
You're like a panther.
CLARA: Are we gonna get
to see you dance this weekend?
MORETTI: Don't fret, my dear.
I'm still uncoordinated.
(LAUGHTER)
STAN: Come on, Clara.
CLARA: What?
Nobody moves like Moretti.
(CHATTER CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
(BREAD CRUNCHING)
(UNEASY MUSIC PLAYING)
(BREAD CRUNCHING)
(QUIET MURMURING)
STAN: Oh. Thank you.
BILL: But it's a pretty one.
Indeed it is.
Yeah. Thought so.
Jorg, right?
Ariel Ecton. (CHUCKLES)
(CHUCKLES)
This is amazing.
(SIGHS) Um...
Full disclosure,
I'm a journalist here,
and we might be writing a piece
just about how amazing
all this is,
and, um, I just wanted to get,
like, a little bit
of background color,
if you're comfortable
talking to me a little.
I used to teach music
at Harden High School
in Charlotte.
One semester, I picked
my favorite musician...
The Wizard of Wiggle himself,
to be the primary focus
for the kids.
One day,
I'm teaching second period
when I get a phone call
saying that Moretti
wanted to meet me.
(CHUCKLING) And at first,
I thought it was a prank,
you know?
-Mmm.
-Of course.
No one had seen Moretti
in almost ten years.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
And then...
he got on the phone...
and that voice is...
...unmistakable.
-Like, this ain't no prank.
-(CHUCKLES)
That's the motherfucking
Debutante himself. (CHUCKLES)
Wait, so...
Moretti just, like,
called you out of the blue?
He told me not to tell anyone.
Did he say
what he wanted or... or...
(LAUGHING) What?
No need. No.
I didn't even tell my job.
No call, no show.
I... I was on a plane
the next morning.
(CHUCKLES)
And now, I teach music theory
to the children.
Like, uh, you know,
little Maudey there.
And John here, uh,
teaches phys ed,
like, uh, you know, like,
uh, track and archery.
"Teach them young,
and the world will be yours."
ARIEL: That's from the book,
right? The...
the... the blue one that's...
-Meditations of Level.
-ARIEL: Yeah.
Is that, um...
Sorry, I don't... I don't know
how else to ask that.
Are you...
-you guys...
-We're Levelists.
What do you, uh...
What is that, I guess,
to you or...
you all?
"The one and only holistic path
"to prevent the obstruction
of creativity
"and ensure the protection
of those divinely burdened
to wield it."
(FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
Doesn't "sycophant" have an "O"?
Probably, yeah. Um...
-Hi.
-Alfred Moretti.
Ariel Ecton.
-Indeed you are.
-(CHUCKLES)
I was shocked to get the invite,
but I'm truly honored
and thrilled
to get to be here this weekend.
I hope so.
-(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
-Don't forget the "O."
-Right. Yeah.
-Rest well.
ARIEL: You, too.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
Congratulations,
and welcome again
to this once-in-a-lifetime
gathering.
For your comfort,
we have assigned each of you
a 24-7 concierge.
If there are
any accommodations
that you may desire,
please do not hesitate
to ask them.
None too big, none too small.
Your concierge is here for you.
STAN: Holy shit,
the Moretti Museum.
-(LIGHT LAUGHTER)
-I can't believe it's real.
CLARA: Oh, the kids are doing
a puppet show.
I love puppet shows.
(EXHALING RHYTHMICALLY)
(RUMMAGING THROUGH BAG)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(SCOFFS, SIGHS)
(LOUD POPPING)
(GUM POPS LOUDLY)
(SIGHS)
MORETTI: (OVER TAPE PLAYER)
This song is titled
Tomorrow, my love.
Please enjoy.
(SLOW, MELANCHOLY INTRO PLAYING)
(SIGHS)
The last time
I fell in love
I was 16
A little ol' boy
With some big ol' dreams
Then she headed west
For this Hollywood thing
Love didn't work out
Like it seemed
I begged her to stay
But I had no means
Stood there
In my cowboy hat
And my favorite jeans
And every night at 8:00
She's on TV
But for me
Things didn't work out
Like they seemed
You deserve the best
And I'll miss you slow
'Cause life's
Moving faster
Faster than before
When we were young
We had time
Felt seconds last forever
But what I never knew
Was how much time
We'd have together
How much time
We'd have together
(SONG ENDS)
(SIGHS)
(DOOR OPENS)
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(FOOTSTEPS)
Hmm?
-Ow!
-MAN: There we go. Go.
BILL: Hey, what are you doing?
-MAN: Go ahead.
-(CREAKING)
(GRUNTING)
What are... No, let go of me!
(GRUNTING)
-MAN: That's it.
-(TOOL WHIRRING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING STOPS)
(BIRD CALLING)
(YAWNING)
Morning.
Good morning.
Can I get you anything?
No. I was just gonna
go for a jog.
(CHUCKLING)
I can go for a jog, right?
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
(SIGHS)
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
(BIRD CALLING)
-(FROG CROAKING)
-(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(ARIEL PANTING)
MORETTI: Morning.
ARIEL: Morning.
How are you finding
everything so far?
Good. Yeah.
How was your morning jog?
It was good.
I, um... I feel bad, though.
My concierge
had to jog with me
the whole time. (CHUCKLES)
You guys really go
above and beyond
with the service here.
Oh, that's the only thing
you find above and beyond?
The service?
Yeah. Um...
I mean, the song was amazing.
Like, genuinely. It was...
gorgeous and haunting
and kind of funny.
Funny? How?
It's just not really how
I picture your heart, I guess.
How did you picture my heart?
(CHUCKLES) Um...
I...
Like Teflon,
glitter-glazed and reinforced
with a shit ton of cash
and applause.
Pardon my French.
Well, don't stop Frenching
on my account, dear. Sit.
ARIEL: Um...
Really, though, I just...
I found it really impressive.
Thank you.
You're able to sing
about all that
like it was yesterday, and...
it was really kind of comforting
that you hadn't lost a step.
Thank you. Well, yes,
that would be a bummer.
(CHUCKLING) Yeah,
that'd be a huge bummer.
Hi, Ariel.
Um...
not to get all
Anderson Cooper on you
-first thing in the morning...
-Mmm-hmm.
...but, um, this place,
this, um...
religion, Level...
...how long ago was it
since you founded it?
Oh. (LAUGHING)
Oh, no. I didn't create it.
You think I wrote all that?
No, I'm just a simple songman.
It existed long before me.
But you are a member?
Yes, I'm very committed to it.
What is it that you guys do?
What do you mean, what do we do?
I mean, all religions
do something.
Catholics go to Mass.
They drink the blood of Christ.
Muslims, uh, pray towards Mecca.
You know, they...
they do things.
All religions have things
that they do together.
Um, then what do you call
a group that does
nothing together?
Congress.
(MORETTI LAUGHS)
Actually, you know what?
There... there is...
one thing we... we all do.
Would you like to see?
Yeah.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(CRACKING NEARBY)
(CRACKING CONTINUES)
(HUSHED) Sorry about the odor.
I wish that I could say
you get used to it,
but you don't.
Now, this believer is engaged
in a process we call Diving.
That's something
we're all called to do.
"We all," including yourself?
Absolutely.
ARIEL: So, you eat them?
For necklaces,
we source only natural pearls,
so that means
we're obligated to open
oyster after oyster after oyster
before we find one
with a pearl in it.
Well, in a hundred oysters,
how often do you find a pearl?
Not all that often,
but distilling it
into a chore of numbers
is beside the point.
Well, what's the point, then?
-(KNIFE SQUISHES)
-(MAN GRUNTING)
MAN: (SOFTLY) Oh, damn.
We should probably...
leave him to it,
let him concentrate.
(DOOR OPENS)
(CHUCKLES) Um...
forgive me if I'm missing
something, but...
what...
(CHUCKLING) What's the point
of that, exactly?
Well, the Meditations of Level
teaches us that the worth
of a single pearl
surpasses the value
of all empty shells
and that balance, true balance,
exists not in the notion
that all things are equal
but in the realization
that all things are not...
equal.
True balance?
Yes.
Like someone who would sleep
12 hours a day
and stay up for 12 hours,
for example.
MORETTI: Hmm.
Did you really buy and wear
Freddie Mercury's teeth?
(SHOWER RUNNING)
(SHOWER STOPS)
(KNOCKING)
Okay.
Hi.
Oh, hello.
It's so great
to finally meet you, Ariel.
Uh, it's nice
to meet you, too...
Rachel.
-Okay.
-Okay, um...
(RACHEL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY
TO STAFF)
Rachel. (CHUCKLES)
-Rachel, hi. Yeah.
-Hi.
What... what is all this?
Here.
Oh, beautiful. Option three,
with the olive foundation,
like we talked about
last week, okay?
-Okay.
-Thank you.
No, I... I got
one of these, actually.
Um... just, like, what is this?
Is this, like, the...
the spa experience or...
Right. Okay.
We're gonna make you look
like the best version of you.
Okay. Um...
What number?
Okay. Two dresses.
Let me ask you this.
Uh...
did you receive a call
out of the blue, maybe,
from Moretti a few years ago,
and that's what brought you
to this place?
I'm sorry, my dear,
the schedule.
Let us do what we do,
and I promise
you will look and feel
-like a million bucks.
-Yeah. Okay.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
Mmm. Mmm.
You have Pam Grier's
bone structure.
-Okay.
-Ooh, truly gorgeous.
Let's not get carried away, now.
Okay.
It's so weird.
You guys do fast work.
It's like, one day
you just look in the mirror
and you're both
of your parents, you're...
(ELECTRIC RAZOR BUZZING)
-(BUZZING STOPS)
-Okay, hon.
So, how's the lady garden?
Umm...
What? (CHUCKLES)
Your lady garden.
(CHUCKLES)
Your cha-cha.
Your vagina, my dear.
When was the last time
you shaved or waxed down there?
Uh, no, yeah,
I... I... I figured.
Um... (LAUGHS)
I don't know.
Uh, I... I... I don't...
I don't know why
it's any of your business.
It... it has been a... a minute.
That's good. That's good.
Moretti requires
that everyone be unshaven.
But what he actually means
is a full, tidy bush,
emphasis on "tidy."
We all do it, even the men.
(LAUGHS)
Does he have plans to...
to... to see...
I'm sure he doesn't.
I've worked on The Debutante
since before
the Cream Crush Tour.
He's had many impressive guests.
Icons, people who had holidays
named after them.
Football players,
Pulitzer Prize winners.
Everyone with 100% certainty
has gone through this process.
Okay, uh, sorry.
So, um, because
some famous, influential people
wanted to... to...
to spend time with Moretti,
they let you,
or whoever else, um...
shave them down there?
Hey, as Moretti always says,
"No one is more of a star fucker
"than the fucking stars."
(ELECTRIC RAZOR BUZZING)
I mean, has the man
ever told a joke
that's actually funny?
-Well...
-Hey.
-Hey.
-(GASPS) Wow, honey.
-You look gorgeous.
-(ARIEL CHUCKLES)
Doesn't she look gorgeous, Stan?
-STAN: No objection here.
-I mean, you guys look amazing.
I love your hair, Clara.
Well, it's a wig.
Yeah, she knows it's a wig,
Stan, you miserable ass.
And they put it on
a little bit too tight,
but other than that,
I think it looks fabulous on me.
It does. This is a look.
Um...
Sorry, did... did...
did your guys's concierges
stay with you all night?
-Yep.
-Yep.
And did they, um...
they shave you down...
-Uh-huh.
-Yeah.
Okay. Cool.
(LAUGHS) Fucking Moretti.
CLARA: Yeah.
(ARIEL CHUCKLES)
-ARIEL: Oh, hey.
-BIANCA: Hey.
-ARIEL: Hey.
-BIANCA: Hey.
EMILY: Ooh. Wow.
-Thank you.
-Wow.
-Bianca, look at this look.
-This is great.
-Stop.
-You look beautiful.
-I've never seen you
look like this.
-All right.
Shall we head
to the listening room?
Um... we're down one,
though, right?
Oh, yeah. Where is Bill?
Mr. Lotto opted for
a longer massage session.
He'll rejoin the group later.
(SCOFFS) Typical.
-Asshole.
-He's so indulgent.
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(LIGHT LAUGHTER, QUIET CHATTER)
MORETTI: I'll only say this,
humanity has been in debt
ever since we found ourselves
on this tiny rock.
Every so often,
there is a Michelangelo
who paints a Sistine Chapel
or a Tina Turner
who covers Proud Mary,
and humanity chips away
at that debt.
Now, I'm not saying this album,
Caesar's Request,
will bring us into the black,
but you can bet your ass
it'll bring us closer to it.
(PULSING ELECTRONIC BEAT PLAYS)
(UPBEAT ELECTRIC GUITAR LINE
PLAYS OVER ELECTRONIC BEAT)
(GRUNTS)
Whoo, whoo.
Hey, babe
Look to me
The way you fall asleep
Tonight I pray
I'm in your dreams
Hey, crazy
Come to me
I love to play
The role of love
Girl, write me
In your scenes
Cameras, action
Fatal attraction
Encore, concords
Latest fashion
Girl, you sexy
And you know it
And you ain't afraid
To show it
I adore you
Bring your gifts
Bring your ass
Bring your lips
Bring me Venus
I'll bring you Mars
Bring the night
I'll bring the stars
I'll bring it all
All, all, all, all, all
35 millimeter
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Light, love, rogue
Live, bold, die
35 millimeter
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Walk, love, walk
Live, walk, die
35 millimeter
Hey, love
Hey, love
I come alive at night
Let's be alive tonight
Sweet soul
Pure soul
Bring a rise
Until I'm hypnotized
Borderlines get crossed
Put me in focus
Girl, I'm hopeless
Don't be camera-shy
Let's both defy this life
Put us on the screen
For everyone to see
Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh
Girl, you sexy
And you know it
And you ain't afraid
To show it
I adore you
Bring your gifts
Bring your ass
Bring your lips
Bring me Venus
I'll bring you Mars
Bring the night
I'll bring the stars
I'll bring it all
35 millimeter
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Light, love, rogue
Live, bold, die
35 millimeter
(VOICE DISTORTED)
Stop, shoot, pose, shoot
Pulse, win, vogue, lose
Walk, love, walk
(DISTORTED HOWLING)
Live, walk, die
Love
Live, die
(COUGHING)
(GASPING)
MORETTI: Can we cut
the music, please?
-Honey, are you all right?
-(SONG STOPS)
-Can we get her some water?
-(CLEARS THROAT, COUGHS)
It's probably a peanut allergy.
I swear, that entire generation
just woke up one day
with a peanut allergy.
-(COUGHS, GASPS)
-It might be
the altitude, actually.
Rachel, can we get her
an IV drip, maybe?
And also,
check with the kind folks
in the infirmary.
-Maybe give her a once-over.
-Just breathe, Emily.
You're... you're in great
hands with... with Rachel.
(EMILY COUGHS, CLEARS THROAT)
Don't worry.
I've had worse reviews.
(LAUGHTER)
MORETTI: Maybe let's all go
get some fresh air
and let the music decant
a little bit, shall we?
-Sure.
-Yeah?
Yeah.
MORETTI: Thank you. I'm honored.
It's just so inspiring.
-(CLARA GROANS)
-Hey. You good?
(CHUCKLING) Yeah.
I'm just trying to loosen it.
What's crazier,
the fact that Moretti
has changed his wardrobe
-six times
in the last two days...
-(CHUCKLES)
...or that he's still
the best entertainer
in the world?
-ARIEL: No, for sure, but--
-CLARA: Yeah.
This whole thing's a trip, man.
Him, this place, like...
The people here
are weirdly talented
and seem mostly happy.
Yeah.
The scars on the hands, though.
I don't know if I love that.
-Huh. I hadn't noticed.
-Yeah.
Um, you know Stan
pretty well, yeah?
Stan? Yeah.
How apeshit do you think he'd go
if I were to write
a secondary piece,
like, on the Levelists?
Here's the thing,
Stan is an asshole,
but if you have
a real story to tell,
not even he can deny that.
STAN: There's something
that unites them.
And I... I'm not quite sure
how to put it, but they...
they're all very different,
but there's something...
It's as if they're all
faces of the one.
MORETTI: Mmm-hm.
Well, you know, Level believes
God is a temporary
state of being
and that divinity
is accessible for all,
but soon fades away.
-STAN: Right.
-For... for instance,
when I created the bridge
-on Live Without Love...
-(STAN SIGHS)
...uh, in that moment,
I was a god.
-Capital "G" God.
-You were.
But only in the same way the...
the person who, uh,
created the horseshoe
thousands of years ago
was a god.
-That is
really fascinating, Alfred.
-Mmm.
Do you think that...
that that could be a little
bit alienating, though?
Just seeing as most people can't
and won't ever create something
truly perfect
in their lifetimes?
Actually, we believe
it's the exact opposite.
That anyone can be a god
at any moment.
The opportunity is there
for everyone,
from the boss
to the lowest on the masthead.
Yeah, it makes sense, right?
We are only vessels.
Some of us have the goods,
some of us don't.
(LAUGHS)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Thank you so much.
-So, what's the deal?
How's the note-taking coming?
-Uh...
No, it's good. It's good.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
I've been finding
a lot of really
fascinating stuff.
-Mmm-hmm.
-I was thinking, you know,
maybe I could write
some sort of secondary...
like, a... a companion piece
to yours.
-Secondary piece?
-Uh, yeah. Secondary,
completely secondary.
(WHISPERING)
Just on the Levelists.
Stan.
Be real with me.
This is a cult.
-(CHUCKLES) Well, yeah.
-Or damn well near one.
Like, this is insane.
Yeah. So?
So, I was talking to...
-to Jorg last night.
-Mmm-hmm.
The backstories
on the members...
They're all just
so fascinating.
I could just do a deep dive--
No, no, no, no.
Let me stop you. Stop, stop.
Let me stop you there.
We are publishing one story.
-(SCOFFS)
-And you're... you're playing
a... a vital role in it.
But, you know,
any and everything
that's interesting
about this place
will be in my story.
-Okay.
-Plus... plus...
the... the... the weird
groupies in blue,
the fucking vases,
god damn dancing,
none of that matters
because it's about the music.
-That's the story,
you know? I mean...
-(ARIEL GASPS)
(GROANING)
-Oh, my God. Stan.
-STAN: Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, somebody help!
-What happened?
-Have Charlan rush here.
-(HYPERVENTILATING)
-What happened?
-Now!
-Oh, my God. Take it out,
take it out, take it out.
-No!
-CLARA: Oh, my goodness!
-(SHUSHING)
-(STAN GROANING)
-Just breathe, just breathe.
-CLARA: What's going on?
-JORG: It looks like
it only hit his shoulder...
-What the fuck?
...but still hurry.
ARIEL: Just breathe,
just breathe, just breathe.
-BIANCA: Don't take it out.
-(STAN GROANING)
-Oh, my God.
-Oh, it's...
I'm so sorry, mister.
It was a mistake with my grip.
It slipped.
(STAN GROANING)
STAN: Oh, my God.
(GROANING CONTINUES)
STAN: Yes?
("DINA SIMONE" PLAYING
INSIDE ROOM)
Ariel. Come, have a drink.
Ariel.
We were just saying we...
we should call over to your room
and invite you over.
-We were just saying that.
-And here you are.
There's not a lot left,
but you look like
a lightweight, so...
Oh, I remember when I used
to look like a lightweight.
Well, we all remember
the '80s, Bianca.
-BIANCA: Fuck you.
-CLARA: Okay.
-STAN: Fuck you.
-CLARA: To Moretti...
-(MUSIC STOPS)
-...the best entertainer
in the world,
still the greatest of all time.
-No doubt.
-BIANCA: Moretti.
Ariel, what's wrong?
Oh, this better not be about
the fucking article.
I know that.
Stan, is it possible
that what happened to you
wasn't an accident?
-CLARA AND STAN: What?
-We're here,
in the middle
of fucking nowhere.
They took our cell phones.
They took our laptops.
We have no way
of communicating
with the outside world.
They're surveilling us,
watching us 24/7.
They're probably
fucking listening in
to this room somehow.
People are fucking missing.
-Let's not forget about that.
-What?
Are you sure
you haven't been drinking
with us?
-(LAUGHING)
-Because this is sounding
a little crazy.
-CLARA: Didn't wanna say it.
-STAN: Sorry.
Something is off.
Is this not alarming
to you at all?
Like, is it weird
or fucking strange
in the least bit?
It's less odd to me
that Bill Lotto's
pretentious ass
thinks that he's too good
to listen to the album
with the rest of us
than it is that
the Alfred Moretti
did all of this
to steal our cell phones
or something. I mean, come on.
I don't know
why he fucking did it.
You said that
they hated each other.
Oh, yeah, they hate each other
over something so silly.
Years ago,
Bill gave an interview
where he sort of
made fun of Moretti
for getting his Doberman
stuffed after it died.
-BIANCA: Oh, Tucker.
-STAN: That's right.
That's right. Tucker. (LAUGHS)
Oh. RIP.
And then, of course,
Moretti was shamed
a little bit
because everybody thought
it was kind of strange,
-because it's kind of strange.
-BIANCA: Mmm-hmm.
This just doesn't feel
fucking right at all to me.
STAN: Okay,
and that's why you're the one
just taking notes.
-Okay. (SCOFFS)
-CLARA: Just calm... Hold on.
-What is happening?
-I don't know. It's...
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(MORETTI SOBBING)
(LEVELISTS MURMURING)
(SOBBING CONTINUES)
The crowd...
the crowd is oh so upset.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
Upset that I'm not onstage.
LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The back row is half asleep.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But the front row
is ready to rage.
LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The drummer was an hour late.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
-He was in the back seat
of a groupie's car.
-LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The spotlight just blew out.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But my sarong,
it shines from afar.
LEVELISTS: Yeah!
The price of the ticket was low.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But we're booked
for another gig.
(CHEERING)
The microphone
is tiny and cheap.
(LEVELISTS GROANING)
But it makes my bulge
look big.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
MAN: Bravo!
(INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRD CALLING)
Ariel?
(KNOCKING)
(BELL TOLLING)
I love you all dearly.
I hope to see you soon.
(QUIET CHATTER)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(DOOR RATTLING)
(FLIES BUZZING)
(SCRATCHING RAPIDLY)
-(SCRATCHING CONTINUES)
-(BREATHING HEAVILY)
(GROANS IN FRUSTRATION)
(SCRATCHING CONTINUES)
-Whoa.
-RACHEL: Are you...
Are you okay?
Don't touch me. Don't touch me.
What's... what's wrong?
-Just, wait a minute.
-(CHUCKLES)
Let me explain, okay?
-I'm leaving.
-Ariel. Ariel.
Ariel!
(PANTING)
Ariel.
I need to leave.
Why? What... what happened?
What's wrong?
(CHUCKLES)
Uh, where's Bill Lotto?
Najee?
I would assume
he's getting dressed for dinner.
Wait, did Bill
do something to you?
No, just, where is he?
Where's... where's Emily Katz?
NAJEE: I just left her.
She's feeling much better
and will join us
at the children's show.
Oh. Okay.
MORETTI: Ariel, you...
Can't you tell me
exactly what happened?
You seemed just peachy
yesterday.
Um, no, I'm not, uh,
explaining anything.
Just, uh, I want to go.
I'm gonna go.
I am going now. I'm leaving.
I'm sorry, but that simply
isn't possible right now.
A few of the believers took
the Louise into town.
They should be back soon.
Okay, well,
what about one of those?
NAJEE: Those will
get you ten miles.
You'll have to walk
the other 40.
Okay. Well, we have to
figure something out,
'cause I gotta go.
This is the opportunity
of a lifetime.
If you're too ungrateful to--
Jorg.
(SCOFFS) Can't you see
she's frightened?
And it's obviously something
we did or didn't do,
so I would like to apologize
for that and assure you
that we will get you out of here
as soon as we can
possibly do so.
Najee, when is
the bus returning?
40 minutes, max.
I'll call them now.
MORETTI: In the meanwhile,
I want you to get a hold of Jeff
and deal with the plane.
Get it fueled up.
Make sure it's ready to go
the second we get Ariel
to the airport, okay?
-No argument, top priority.
-Yes, sir.
But what about the puppet show?
MORETTI: Well, she...
she has to leave,
so she... she'll miss it
this time.
But we worked so hard,
and you were supposed
to sit next to me.
It's not fair.
MORETTI: You know,
maybe we can do this.
If Ariel agrees,
the children's building
is the closest one
to the gate,
and she could stay
and watch the show
until the bus got here.
If you feel comfortable
with that.
I could see the entrance
from the building?
Like, I could see it?
(STAMMERS)
Cross my heart, hope to die.
(SCOFFS)
Yeah, fine.
-Yes!
-ARIEL: Okay.
Jorg, if you could...
Thank you.
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
STAN: (SOFTLY) Yeah.
(QUIET CHATTER)
(SIGHS)
(CHUCKLING)
CLARA: Cute.
MORETTI: All right, children.
Presenting
The Tragedy of Billie.
(APPLAUSE)
(SOMBER JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
(PUPPETS CHATTERING)
(PUPPETS LAUGHING)
(CHUCKLES)
(PUPPET CHATTER
AND LAUGHTER STOPS)
BILLIE HOLIDAY: Okay. I'm ready.
-(PUPPETS CLAMORING)
-PUPPETS: Lady Day!
Tell us, has the trauma
in your childhood
helped you make
such successful music?
Coming from where I'm from,
to be where I'm at now,
well, I guess that's
a sweet song in itself.
But I wouldn't wish
my childhood on anyone,
-even for success.
-Tell us about prison.
Did you perform any ditties
in the slammer?
Well, I'm no saint.
You already knew that.
And prison sure ain't
full of saints,
but neither is
the rest of the world.
Are you still on smack?
I'm very pleased to announce
that I'm 100% sober
as I stand here
and plan to finish my days
exactly that way.
I'm embarrassed and ashamed
of the mistakes
I've made in my past
and ask my fans and family
to forgive me
as best as they can.
I know I'm certainly trying to.
When did the weight gain start?
How do you feel about McKay
blowing your fortune?
Are you flat broke?
Reports say you're flat broke.
Billie, when will we hear
Strange Fruit again?
Do you think
a former prostitute
should be a role model?
Billie! Ms. Holiday!
(PUPPET REPORTERS CLAMORING)
PUPPET REPORTERS:
Billie! Ms. Holiday!
PUPPET REPORTERS: Lady Day!
(PUPPET REPORTERS LAUGHING)
Something moved.
Something moved.
What... what the fuck is that?
(GASPS)
-What the fuck?
-Oh, my God.
STAN: Jesus.
STAN: Is... is this
some kind of joke?
-CLARA: What?
-STAN: Is there some...
someone in there?
Oh, fuck. Oh, my God.
What the fuck?
Jesus Christ.
(EMILY GROANING)
CLARA: Oh, my God.
-STAN: Em?
-(EMILY WHIMPERING)
-BIANCA: Oh, my God.
-NAJEE: Time to go, children.
STAN: What the fuck
is wrong with her?
(EMILY GRUNTING, WHIMPERING)
Um, I promised
I would be an open book,
and welshing ain't cute.
Well done, kids.
Very... very charming.
Uh, so I'll try and explain.
Whatever chemical compound
she ingested,
uh...
Sorry, science is a bit of
a "blah, blah, blah" to me.
Suffice it to say
that whatever
is wet inside her body
is rapidly expanding.
Is... is that
more or less accurate?
-More or less.
-MORETTI: You see?
Wonders happen
when we follow the science.
Wouldn't you say, dear?
(EMILY GASPING)
STAN: Don't...
What the fuck are you doing?
-CLARA: Oh, my God.
Don't touch her.
-STAN: Jesus.
-(ALL GROANING)
-(EMILY GRUNTS)
-(ALL GASPING)
-STAN: Jesus Christ.
-MORETTI: Jorg, please.
-STAN: He's fucking insane.
-MORETTI: A towel.
-Move.
Move, you motherfuckers!
No! Let me go!
-Get off of me!
-(GRUNTING)
-LEVELIST: Nobody leaves!
-BIANCA: I wanna go.
Let me go.
-Stay down.
-Okay.
-Fuck! Look at that.
-(STAN SOBBING)
I mean, will you look at that?
Why is it
that waterproof foundation
is never truly waterproof?
-Why?
-(MUFFLED GRUNTING)
JORG: Great question.
MORETTI: And, you know, I...
I must say something,
I'm afraid.
-(CLARA SOBBING)
-Um... (SNIFFS)
(CLARA MUTTERING)
MORETTI: Many of us here
have worked
very hard to make this
a once-in-a-lifetime event,
and I find that
all of you are being
very, very disruptive.
-(GASPING, CRYING)
-MORETTI: Excuse... excuse me.
-That's dramatic.
-CLARA: (CRYING) Let me go.
I just wanna go.
Excuse me. That's dramatic.
Now, may we finally begin
the Q and A
to discuss Caesar's Request?
(YELLING)
(PANICKED SCREAMING)
NAJEE: Hey, hey, hey!
(WHIMPERING, SCREAMING)
LEVELIST: Sit!
-BIANCA: Oh, my God.
-(WHIMPERING, SCREAMING)
BIANCA: Oh!
(CLARA SCREAMING)
STAN: Jesus Christ.
(SCREAMING)
MORETTI: Shut her up!
(SCREAMING STOPS)
(STAN GROANING)
(CLARA GASPING)
-LEVELIST: Sit her up.
-MORETTI: Intermission
is finished.
(BREATH TREMBLING)
What the fuck is this?
"What the fuck is this?"
That's what you said?
"What the fuck is this?"
So, the first question
of my first interview
in 30 years is,
"What the fuck is this?"
(SIGHS)
You know, I... I think
I could do better on my own,
-so let's give it a try.
-(FEEDBACK SQUEALS)
(IMITATING VALLEY GIRL)
Uh, Mr. Alfred Moretti.
Question mark.
Why did you
name your new album,
like, Caesar's Request?
(IN NORMAL VOICE)
Thank you for the question.
And thank you, Billie,
for the invite.
Well, it's an interesting story.
One day,
while summering on the Cape,
I was engrossed by an account
of the time that
Julius Caesar was kidnapped.
Now, does anyone here
happen to know
who kidnapped Julius Caesar?
(FEEDBACK SQUEALS)
(SOFTLY) Pirates.
Pirates.
From the mouths of babes.
You're absolutely right,
Ariel Ecton.
Now, let me ask you,
uh, do you happen to know
how Julius Caesar responded
once he'd been freed?
He went back with his army.
MORETTI: To do what?
Don't disappoint us, now.
He killed all of his kidnappers.
MORETTI: Um,
he crucified them, actually.
Every single one of them.
No hyperbole,
no foundational myth
about a man walking on water.
Just simple, actual
crucifixion for all of them.
Now tell me, teacher's pet,
on whom I'm about to place
a big, big bet...
what's the best part
of the story?
(SOFTLY) Um...
-(ARIEL SHUDDERING)
-Well, the best part
of the story is that
the pirates who kidnapped
the Julius Caesar
thought he was
a commoner. (CHUCKLES)
They thought
they were his equal.
And because
of this misconception,
they asked the same ransom
for Julius Caesar
that they would've asked
for any Joe Schmo Roman.
And this meant that
Caesar was obligated
to demand a raise in his ransom
so that it would be commensurate
with his position.
And what does that tell us?
Well...
(WHISPERING)
It tells us that royalty,
even when at the mercy
of peasants,
is still royalty, doesn't it?
Doesn't it?
(IN NORMAL VOICE) Now,
what about that story, kids?
And how about that puppet show?
(LAUGHING)
The Tragedy of Billie.
I think that interview
went rather well.
-JORG: Wonderful,
wonderful interview.
-BIANCA: No.
(CRYING) Please, please.
-Please let me go.
-BIANCA: Stan.
Please. Please.
-No, no, please.
-(CLARA WHIMPERS)
(CRYING) I'm sorry.
Please.
(GROANS)
BIANCA: (CRYING) Stan. No.
(STAN GRUNTING)
-(GRUNTING)
-(BIANCA GROANING)
-(KNIFE STABBING REPEATEDLY)
-(BELLE GRUNTING)
Belle.
(STABBING CONTINUES)
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
Baby Jane, I lost my nerve
Hear my heart
Please ignore my words
We jumped the broom
That was the best of days
(STAN GROANS)
Since we broke up
I've been in a daze
Baby Jane
Please don't take the cat
(GRUNTING VICIOUSLY)
("BABY JANE"
CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
RECORDED VOICE: Welcome
to the Rhinestone Chalet,
Moretti's childhood home
turned interactive museum.
Did you know
that Alfred's roots
come from Peoria, Illinois?
...feel to you until that day.
I mean, until that moment.
-(STABBING CONTINUES)
-(BELLE GRUNTING VICIOUSLY)
-(DOORKNOB RATTLING)
-LEVELIST: Circle back around.
(DOOR CREAKING SHUT)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(BIRD CALLING)
So jealous.
(BREATHING WEAKLY)
(BREATHING STOPS)
(CHIMES TINKLING)
You're still pretty.
(BIRDS CALLING)
(CLATTERING DOWNSTAIRS)
(DOOR CREAKING)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(DOOR RATTLING)
(RATTLING STOPS)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(FOOTSTEPS FADING IN DISTANCE)
(GRUNTING)
(STRAINING)
(SCREWDRIVER CLATTERS ON FLOOR)
-(CLATTERING)
-(PAINED GRUNTING)
(LOUD THUD)
(GRUNTING AND CLATTERING STOPS)
(DISTORTED VOICES
SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
MORETTI: ...sacrifice of
our beautiful creation.
See, we can't, uh,
un-paint a canvas
or un-play a chord.
And if a mistake has been made,
either yours or someone else's,
the only way to rectify it
is to make something beautiful.
Now, I've studied
at every temple of taste
in the entire world.
I've picked over
every reliquary that exists.
But I've never seen anything
as beautiful as you pearls.
We don't know
what tomorrow will bring.
Maybe we'll all be together...
(ARIEL SHUDDERING)
(MORETTI CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
(RACHEL SHUSHING)
Listen to me.
When you get to the gate,
make a right, okay?
(SHUSHES)
And then, go until you see
the light, all right?
But let's hope
it's something beautiful.
To our time in the sand.
LEVELISTS: To our time
in the sand.
Push me.
Cheers.
(WHISPERS) Cheers.
(ARIEL GRUNTING)
-(GROANING)
-(LEVELISTS SCREAMING)
(MORETTI GASPING FRANTICALLY)
(MORETTI WHIMPERING)
-(WHIMPERING CONTINUES)
-(ATV ENGINE REVVING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
(GRUNTING)
(GROANS)
(YELPS)
(PANTING)
-Hey.
-(TAPPING ON WINDOW)
Help, help, help!
-Who are you?
-I was in the house.
I was there,
and people are dead,
and we have to go.
-LEE: You were in there?
-Yes, I was in there.
Holy shit, you're bleeding.
Are you hurt?
-Yes, I am hurt!
-Is Moretti hurt?
Yes, he's hurt,
so we have to go.
-You met Moretti?
-We have to leave.
LEE: Wait, did he do the wiggle?
I bet he did the wiggle.
Did you hear
the new song... (GROANS)
ARIEL: I'm so sorry!
-(LEE COUGHING)
-(ENGINE STARTS)
(LEE GROANING)
(BREATH TREMBLING)
(ENTRY BELL JINGLING)
(CASH REGISTER BEEPING)
INTERVIEWER: Do you think
about why that Levelist
helped you escape that night?
Or do you mentally try not
to go back to that time?
(CLICKS TONGUE, SIGHS)
Maybe a mix of both.
I don't know.
I'm... This is, like,
my millionth interview
this month,
so you have to forgive me.
Book tours are...
BOTH: Exhausting.
-Yeah, exhausting.
-(LAUGHING) Yes, I'm tired.
So, you know I gotta ask...
Is that how it really happened
when you went back
to the compound?
It's... it's exactly
as I wrote it.
-(BIRDS CHIRPING)
-(SIRENS WAILING)
(PIANO PLAYING GENTLE MELODY)
INTERVIEWER:
And he was actually
just sitting there alone,
still in the white suit,
playing the piano?
I do feel like I've said this
a million times at this point,
but it was, uh, surreal.
Cops haven't been able to
locate a single Levelist body.
They still haven't found
the fan who was at the gate.
-Just nothing.
-Hmm.
-(PHONE BUZZING)
-Um, sorry.
-Do you mind if I...
-Oh, yeah.
Thanks.
Hello? This is Ariel Ecton.
Ariel. Guess who.
It's Soledad Yusef
calling from sunny
Malibu, California.
And how do you find yourself
this Monday morning?
My love? Hello?
-What do you want?
-Ooh. Someone's spicy
this morning.
But I believe it's more
of what you want.
Didn't you send in
six interview requests
to sit down with Mr. Moretti
for your novel?
Well, you're in luck.
Mr. Moretti would like
to sit down this evening
at the high-risk
state hospital in Reno.
It's like a medieval torture
chamber, if you ask me.
Honestly, these states
should be tried for the way
they treat people.
It's just absolutely abhorrent.
ARIEL: Soledad, you are aware
that your client,
Alfred Moretti,
pled guilty to the murder
of five innocent people,
tried to kill me,
and is suspected
of leading hundreds
of Levelists to mass suicide?
He's passionate.
Ciao, my darling.
Take care of yourself.
(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)
(CELL DOOR BUZZING)
(DOOR CLANGS SHUT)
Salutations, as they say.
Oh, heavy.
Shall we get started?
(BEEPS)
Python.
-Excuse me?
-Well, in your novel,
you wrote that when...
the first day we met
that I was wearing
cream-colored alligator boots,
but in fact, they were
smoke-colored python boots.
Now, of course,
that's an easy mistake to make
for an untrained eye,
but, uh, I would never.
It's unimaginable--
In my "novel," you said?
In my 320-page non-fiction text,
your biggest gripe is with
the material of your boots?
You know, it's just, a little
constructive criticism
never killed anyone, Ariel.
Okay. (SCOFFS)
-(RECORDER BEEPS)
-Um...
I didn't expect you
to be remorseful
like a normal person,
but I came here
to try to report the truth
so that there's closure
for the families and--
(WHISPERS)
And to sell a few more books.
-Well...
-Ariel, while you circle
around and around
the one question
that you most assuredly
came here to ask me...
Very quickly...
Primitive man chose their leader
in the same way that
animals chose their leader...
uh, brute strength.
Yeah, I... I'm familiar
with Darwin's theory.
Uh, what does that have to do
with you being a murderer?
Man evolved.
Humanity evolved.
Um, it, uh, created government
and rules and law.
And with those things,
then the criteria
for what was needed
in a leader changed.
So, it went from this
to left brain.
To be president,
you have to go
to an Ivy League school
and get a little Ivy League
law degree
to signal to the rest of us,
the peons,
uh, that this is
the smart person.
But look at where we are.
Today's world is burning,
literally.
Illiteracy is at its highest.
We've never been more divided.
We have permanent war,
and the list goes on.
So, clearly, the metric,
this left-brain metric,
failed miserably.
But there is an answer.
A new evolution.
So, won't be this anymore
or this left brain
but this right brain
where the most creative
are in charge.
Look, I'm not just gonna
sit here and act like
I didn't find Stan's old article
where he referred to Tilt
as overrated,
Bianca's rather unflattering
paparazzi shots.
Not good. Not too pretty.
And let's not forget Clara's
digs about your bald head.
And even you can't
wiggle your way free
after murdering
hundreds of people.
I didn't murder
hundreds of people.
You didn't murder Stan Sullivan,
Clara Armstrong,
Bianca Tyson,
Emily Katz, and Bill Lotto?
Oh, yeah, I murdered them.
You should know
your masterpiece, Ariel,
is also the introduction
to our story.
No one will condone murder.
But if it's scandalous enough,
they'll never stop
talking about it.
Besides, you're not gonna stop
becoming Catholic
'cause you read a book
about the Crusades.
You're serving a life sentence
five times over.
Why not just tell us
where the bodies are?
Where are the Levelists?
Around.
We're spread out,
but still connected
to teach the young
and sprout new chapters,
to preserve dying crafts,
to inspire and comfort,
to fan the flames
of raw enthusiasm,
to closely monitor those
who obstruct
the divinely burdened.
Not hiding but waiting.
Waiting to better tomorrow.
So, what was in
the champagne glasses, then?
-Champagne.
-(ARIEL SIGHS)
-Okay.
-MORETTI: Oh.
With talent comes forgiveness.
The bigger the talent,
the more complete
the forgiveness.
Level will grow and grow.
We just, uh... (SIGHS, CHUCKLES)
needed someone
to get the ball rolling.
(SOFTLY) So, um...
Come on. You get it.
(SCOFFS)
So, why me?
Disco.
Two reasons, really.
One for us, one for me.
For us, we felt
you were a pure vessel,
completely uncorrupted
by success,
uncorrupted by cheap shots
for clicks.
For me, while looking
through your background,
I read a story you'd written
about a school board lady.
-Remember that?
-ARIEL: Carol Reggo?
That piece was less
than 500 words. It was before
I was even at J.
You wrote that her chin was
"delightfully inconspicuous."
And I needed my chin
in good hands.
(MOUTHING)
TV HOST: Once in a generation,
a tragedy so compelling occurs,
it grabs the entire world's
attention.
Most people
condemn the horrific events
that took place a few years ago,
while a growing minority
sympathize with
the guilty party.
After all, Caesar's Request
has sold millions of copies
since its release.
But the one thing
we can all agree on...
Our next guest is a star.
Her new book
was an instant bestseller,
but unless
you've been living on Mars,
you already know that.
Ms. Ecton, good morning.
Congratulations.
I'm so thrilled to be
sitting down with you today.
I mean, Our Time in the Sand
is such a daring,
beautiful novel.
What does it feel like
to have written the book
that everybody's talking about?
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
(WHISPERING) Ms. Ecton?
( "DLZ" BY TV ON THE RADIO
PLAYING)
Congratulations on the mess
You made of things
I'm trying to reconstruct
The air and all that brings
And oxidation is
The compromise you own
But this is beginning
To feel
Like the dog wants a bone
Say
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
You force your fire and then
You falsify your deeds
Your methods dot
The disconnect
From all your creeds
And fortune strives to fill
The vacuum that it feeds
But this is beginning
To feel
Like the dog's lost a lead
Say
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la
La, la, la
This is beginning
To feel like
The long-winded blues
Of the never
This is beginning
To feel like
It's curling up slowly
And finding a throat
To choke
This is beginning
To feel like
The long-winded blues
Of the never
Barely controlled
Locomotive
Consuming the picture and
Blowing the crows, the smoke
This is beginning
To feel like
The long-winded blues
Of the never
Static explosion devoted
To crushing the broken
And shoving their souls
To ghost
Eternalized, objectified
You set your sights so high
But this is beginning
To feel like
The bolt busted loose
From the lever
Never mind,
Death professor
Your structure's fine
My dust is better
Your victim flies so high
All to catch a bird's-eye
View of who's next
Never you mind
Death professor
Love is life
My love is better
Your victim flies so high
Eyes could be the diamonds
Confused with who's next
Never you mind
Death professor
Your shocks are fine
My struts are better
Your fiction flies so high
Y'all could use a doctor
Who's sick, who's next?
Never you mind
Death professor
Electrified
My love is better
It's crystallized, so am I
All could be the diamond
Fused with who's next
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn
Of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
This is beginning
To feel like
The dawn of a loser forever
(SONG ENDS)