Oversize Cops (2017) Movie Script

This time, we can't make any mistakes.
O, Yoy, flank to the center.
Me and Can will stand by right here.
Watch it. Don't let it dry.
The pork will stick to the pan.
Begin the operation!
Hi, ladies.
-I heard you're internet icons.
-Because you eat like this.
-We can't compete.
-But thanks anyway
You gave us the credit.
It's not yours. It's the captain's credit.
You two are just...
-Wallpaper, Fatty?
-You'd better say my father's name.
-That's my father.
Take it easy.
It's not work hours. Relax.
Pluem, that's too relaxed. Get up.
I'm Captain Jhet, these four's boss.
Sergeant Can, Sergeant Yoyl,
Sergeant O...
and sergeant Pluem.
Captain. Have you seen this clip?
This is the story of four fat sergeants.
Let's start from the beginning.
This is the beginning,
where it all started.
Code two. 141 is following the criminal.
Shit! Why now?
I was eating.
-This is not the time! Give it to me.
-I'm hungry.
This is not the time.
You want some?
I can't take it anymore.
You want to try me, yeah?
Yoy, aim low.
Shoot the tire.
Drift like Vin Diesel. Shit!
-What's wrong with the car?
-Maybe it's too heavy.
Pluem, hurry.
Can, come help us.
It's because of you!
What's that noise?
Go, captain!
The story of these four fatties
was filmed.
It's been shared around so much,
it's become famous on the internet.
In less than 24 hours,
it has over a million views.
Get them!
Left. Left. Go!
A million views.
I will not allow the police's image
to be tarnished like this anymore.
Within three months,
every cop in this station...
must meet a standard waistline and weight.
What counts as standard?
How much?
-Standard is standard.
-What if we can't do it?
There's nothing Thai police can't do.
I can't lick my elbow. Look.
If anybody is really weak and can't do it,
I have a friend who is a director
in border control.
He said that he is currently looking
for more personnel.
Right on cue.
Don't suck it in.
Can you lift up your shirt for me?
I'm worried it won't be precise.
Don't you just love that?
Why did he take off his shirt?
Risk of heart disease, arthritis, diabetes
and high blood pressure. Don't pass.
-I wish I could just die.
-Me too.
Cholesterol 280. Sugar 120.
Triglyceride 215. Uric 8.
Creatinine 3.2
-What is it?
-It's bad.
-Are you all right?
Take care.
How about yours?
PASS THE ASSESSMEN Captain. We want you to help us.
Come in.
What's it, Captain?
I would like you to reconsider
the punishment for the project.
Nothing to reconsider.
It's already been approved.
But many policemen here are--
-Many policemen here are--
-Many policemen here are overweight.
Okay. Many policemen here are fat,
but that doesn't mean they're ineffective.
Captain, my decision is not
about effectiveness.
It's about our image.
Let's say we have two policemen.
One is fat, the other is firm.
A lady gets her bag snatched.
-Which one will she ask for help?
-Both of them.
-It's clear.
-Is it cancelled?
We have less than three months.
What do we do now?
First, you have to run.
When I graduated,
five kilometers was easy.
I'm gonna die.
-Do we live in a wrong planet?
-What're you talking about?
Haven't you heard?
A hundred kilograms on earth
weighs only 38 kilograms on Mars.
Watch your left!
-He must be an alien.
-Who's that?
Lieutenant Pao or the "Rock Pig.
Plain-clothes officer with the highest
arrest numbers in the station.
Do you drink engine oil?
He runs like a Formula One car.
-Where's Pluem?
Over there. Slow like a turtle.
We should go.
He will take a while.
Watch your left!
Mr. Captain America!
Watch your left!
-What's that?
Next, let's try competitive sports.
Have you ever played this?
How hard can it be?
Run. Catch. Hit. Easy.
Pluem, catch!
Volleyball. No battle, no pain.
-I still have another way.
Is it good?
Low calories. What should I have to eat?
Pork leg with basil.
Lots of skin.
-Three fried eggs.
Pluem, you ordered 4,000 calories
worth of food.
"Change a pig into a smart man.
Fast, precise. Reduce fat and calories.
Take today, lose weight tomorrow.
Guaranteed by professional doctors."
It's exaggerating.
Don't say you're going to take these.
You took it.
Who is it?
Eat me.
Eat me.
Did you speak English?
Eat me.
Eat me. Eat me.
Eat me. Eat me. Eat me.
Eat me!
-Why are you returning it?
What did you give us?
-What happened?
-Your pill!
-Who're you calling?
-Eat me.
What does it mean?
Eat me.
I'm here.
There's nothing to eat.
-Eat me.
-Ms. Knuckle.
You are overreacting.
Enough, Pluem.
We hallucinated.
I am fine.
Are you sure you're fine?
You're vibrating like a telephone.
Don't worry. I'm okay.
You never remember!
You didn't unlock the safety.
What should we do about losing weight?
Should we try intuition?
No, I have been there. It's expensive.
I thought I bought a house.
-The gym?
-No, the trainer always sells me courses.
they have hypnosis acupuncture.
-Should we try that?
I'm afraid of needles.
-What's to be scared of?
-How about eating parasites?
When I was a kid, my neighbor had it.
He got thinner.
It's not a good thing.
I haven't forgiven you about the pill.
Why is it this hard?
We used to be thin.
Back then, I could eat three pigs' legs.
I didn't get fat. Perfect body.
Now, I get fat just drinking water.
Yes. Exercise for months...
lose just two grams. Not fair.
You three are better.
Since I got married,
I've changed my clothes size
every three months. Waste of money.
-Can't he wait? It's so noisy.
-Why do you put it on him?
-When did you come?
-I heard.
Who wants some bread?
You idiot! You asked why he can't wait.
I bought it this morning.
Thank you. Do sane people
just walk around with bread on them?
Is there anything else?
You'll never make it in three months.
Do it my way.
-Why do you want to help us?
-You remind me of someone.
-Who is that?
When I was a kid,
nobody called me by my name.
Everybody called me Kurobuta.
Piggy Kurobuta!
Piggy Kurobuta!
Kurobuta. Piggy.
I can imagine.
No matter how much they mocked me,
I never forgot my dream.
To be a cop one day.
What did you do to be here?
-You mean handsome?
-I mean thin.
Exercise and diet. Sounds simple,
but it's the only way to lose weight.
Yes, he shared the location with me.
Idiot! That's a dolphin. Are you crazy?
Tan, are you sure? Last time...
at the volleyball court...
I'm still hurting.
Any other way?
I told you to eat parasites.
I told you we can't eat that.
What are we doing here?
I want to introduce someone.
Hey, guy.
For someone this beautiful,
I'm all in.
It's okay.
It's okay. I'm used to it.
This is Meen, the trainer
who will help you lose weight.
I heard from Jhet that you only
have three months to lose 20 kilograms.
As a trainer, I wouldn't recommend
losing that much weight so quickly.
But given your situation...
we might have to do it
Diet schedule and exercise.
Meen will take care of it.
For breakfast, two boiled eggs, 155 cal.
Thirteen grams of protein.
For lunch, chicken breast, 187 calories.
-Thirty-five grams of protein.
-This is difficult.
Where can we eat?
-Yes, we can eat here.
We're responsible for every meal
on the list, but there's one catch.
Do not eat anything other than that.
Okay. We should get started.
We'll begin with building muscle.
Muscles help the fat burning process.
When you have a better burning process,
you'll lose weight faster.
This part will be Jhet's responsibility.
Go on.
Do your best.
Push it up.
Hey! Hey! Hey!
Shit! I cheered you up.
No need to repay me.
Beside weight training,
you have to do cardio as well.
Meen will take care of this.
Let's get started.
She's my type.
Okay. Dance after me.
Count the rhythm.
Five, six, seven, eight.
-Why are you smiling?
-I know what you're thinking.
You didn't blink once looking at her.
-Looking at who?
-Is she beautiful?
-Of course. She's smooth.
-My wife is better.
-Boa View?
-Take her to get checked for diabetes.
-Yoy. Don't say that.
Why? She's really big.
-Like an elephant.
-Don't tease him.
He loves his wife.
And you love her, right?
If you like her,
I won't stand in your way.
So we don't have to fight.
-Isn't Meen the captain's girl?
She came with him.
Doesn't mean she's his.
Are you sure? He's popular.
Pluem, you think too highly of him.
Is he better than us?
Just more handsome, richer,
firmer and more reliable.
Shit! Better in every way.
But I don't think she's his girl.
Do you really like her?
-Aren't you going home?
-Jhet's still inside.
You and he are
We are siblings.
How are you getting home?
You can go with Can.
He's going the same way.
But I never told you where I live.
-Where do you live?
-The condo--
That's it. Same way.
You'll be safe with my friend.
Shit! Walk in water like Bear Grylls.
Do you like cats?
I'm their slave.
Are you hitting on me?
-Are you okay?
-I'm fine.
Do you mind if I do?
I'm here.
Too close.
-Thank you.
-My pleasure.
See you tomorrow.
We can't say much.
We have some important information
but we won't reveal it now.
For government benefit.
-What's the situation?
-Money truck robbery.
Two criminals.
One used a gun to rob the money bag.
Then he escaped on a bike
that the other one drove.
Go ask more information from people here.
See if anybody can give us the lead.
Yes, sir.
-What did you see?
-There were two robbers.
No, three.
-Then they escaped by the van.
-What van? Motorcycle.
So, which was it, then?
I don't know. I head from someone else.
-Can I ask you some--
-And if tonight--
Can I ask you about this morning?
Are you the cop from the clip?
That's right. He's fatter in person.
Can I take photos with you?
-What do you want?
-Som tum.
-Spicy or not?
-How many chilies?
One is not spicy.
What do you want?
-It's about a robbery.
-What robbery?
-Money truck robbery.
-This morning.
-How many robbers?
-How much did they get?
-Five million.
-Thanks for the information.
-Four as usual?
I'm on a case.
Do you know anything about the robbery?
I'm the one who robbed it.
I used an M16 to shoot.
Then I used a shotgun.
Not funny.
I can tell you're stressed.
Relax with some barbecue?
No, I'm on a diet.
-Have we forgotten something?
I told you not to eat anything
not on that list.
The more you eat, the more you exercise.
I have to change the schedule
because of you.
Did you know that Thai boxing
is the best cardio you can do?
Are you teaching us to box?
Not me. Over there.
So quiet.
Who's that?
My boxing coach.
Can, go easy on her. Leave me some.
He left you plenty.
How good can you be?
Time's up.
-Come at me at the same time.
-Are you sure, coach?
-Come on.
-Me first.
That wasn't any good.
How are you going to catch criminals?
If the criminal is this good,
I give up.
We cannot make you the best
in the short time we have.
So I'm going to teach you some easy moves
that will really work.
If we are locked like this...
Now you try.
Can, switch with me.
I can't do it anymore.
-Are you flexing?
Yoy. How about tomorrow?
-Hold it in for your health.
Why don't we get fat
from eating vegetables?
And why don't pigs' legs make us healthy?
That would make the world a lot better.
Pluem, don't eat snacks.
Let me smell it.
You can't eat that.
I'll take it.
Come see me when you finish.
-Do you want to deflate his tire?
Thirteen seconds in.
This is something.
The driver may be a part of it.
I asked sergeant Big and Bank
to investigate and found nothing.
Take a close look at the bike.
The same one that robbed a gold shop.
Investigate that bike.
Long time no see.
Your friend?
I thought he was yours.
Who are you?
Who am I? The cop that arrested you.
-Get in.
He was handsome.
That's captain Jhet.
We were in a car.
We couldn't get over the bridge,
then we slid down, crashed and fell--
O, stop talking.
How can we help?
It's not clear.
But I do know that pipe.
Only two persons have it.
One is me.
The other is Pong.
Otherwise known as...
Pong Double Pipe.
And do you know where we can find him?
Hi. What's up?
Show it.
Don't move.
Captain, which one is Pong Double Pipe?
Who is Pong Double Pipe?
-Shit! He's gone.
-Get him alive.
Don't move. Stop.
Is he with the running club? So fast.
Can you do it harder?
Yeah! Good.
Too hard!
Are you tired, Fatty?
Why am I looking at this?
I don't know anything.
Two motorcycle professionals
said that these are the same bike.
Same model and design.
The tire marks also match your bike.
It's not mine.
I don't know whose it is.
Are you sure it's not yours?
Are you sure?
Anything to say?
I give up. I'll talk. I did it.
He paid me to drive.
I robbed it. Don't smash my pipe!
We have three people.
Me, the thief and the boss.
I don't know him.
But I can give you the robber's name.
-BRAWL ASSAUL His name is Khem.
Focus on getting Khem first.
The problem is we don't know where he is.
But I asked Big and Bank
to find their address.
-What do we do?
-Stay where you are.
Let the professionals handle it.
Are you looking for a fight,
talking like this?
-You want some?
-Enough. You deal with the weight first.
I'll let you know if anything comes up.
Do you think he doesn't want us
on the case?
O, you're over thinking.
We're the ones who caught Pong.
It's not our doing.
To be honest,
if the Rock Pig hadn't turned up,
how would we have arrested him?
What's wrong with you?
We can prove to him
that we are the real deal.
-Get fit.
When I couldn't run after Pong,
I was disappointed with myself.
The bad guy was in front of me,
but I couldn't catch him.
I was wondering why I couldn't get fit
and get better.
Let's get fit!
Don't be so quiet.
Good. You guys go on.
I'll support you.
Pluem, what's up with you?
Come here.
Can't you move it? It's easy.
Please welcome our four men.
You're better at dancing.
-You're better at dancing.
I have a good coach.
Can I ask you how do you become a cop?
-You're overweight.
Shy and weak. Bad at fighting.
-Can't stand straight. Eat too much.
-Enough, Meen. I get it.
-So why become a cop?
-I don't know.
-Why do you ask?
-People around me dislikes cops.
Especially my father.
Maybe he's a bad guy.
Does he sell illegal stuff?
Or move duty free gear?
Not that!
I'm kidding.
I'm used to it.
People hate cops.
But when they're in trouble,
it's only cops who come to help.
Some people like cops.
Because some cops... are cute.
Fuck. You danced into me.
We are in a club.
-It happens, bro.
-Who's your bro, fatty?
-Easy, Yoy.
Big body but a small heart.
Go back to your pigpen.
I can smell the fat.
Burning smell. Must be his fat.
-Fuck you.
Go home.
That's it.
Beer is here.
I'm shot.
Call the police.
Next time, I'll shoot the one
with the camera, first.
The victim is threatening to sue us.
And if he does...
our image will be damaged.
-Director, he had a knife--
I don't want any excuses.
You'll be investigated
and suspended indefinitely.
Director, please reconsider.
Lately, they've been doing great.
This is mercy.
You too.
Focus on the case.
Give me the gun.
That way, you can't shoot anyone.
Then you can go.
Another thing.
If you don't lose weight,
I won't just transfer you guys.
I'll fire you.
What was that? I paid for that gun.
Don't worry too much.
I've seen your improvement.
Tomorrow, the weight loss results
will be good.
GREAT IMPROVEMEN We may actually make it.
NO IMPROVEMEN Great improvement.
Why Can is the only one?
You followed the schedule, didn't you?
Didn't you?
I confess.
I didn't follow it.
I can't sleep.
The whole pack?
-I'm sorry.
-Yoy, why did you do that?
Shut it, O. You too.
You don't love me anymore.
You don't eat my meals.
I have to lose my weight.
That's right.
You will run off with someone else.
And you, Pluem?
I was hungry.
Pluem, don't you have anything to say?
Haven't you heard?
Exercise but not diet won't help.
You'll just be a strong pig.
Captain, sorry to disappoint you.
You don't have to say sorry.
No matter how much I help,
if you don't help yourselves...
You can't win over yourselves.
Everything I do is useless.
Let's do this.
We have two months left.
If you start your diet now,
we can do it.
-Are you giving up?
Two months, 20 kilograms.
Who can do that?
Besides, I'm bored.
I love eating. What's wrong with that?
I know. I love it too.
But it's temporary happiness.
Aren't you bored seeing fit men?
Or seeing clothes you like,
but can't wear?
Or people thinking you're a clown?
Trust me. I followed the schedule.
In one month, I lost seven kilograms.
If I can do it, you can too.
Can, you know what?
You're acting like people on the internet,
showing off when you can do it.
I hate those people.
I'm just trying to be supportive.
Supportive? To be honest, Can,
if you weren't hitting on Meen,
-you'd be just like us.
-Why did you say that?
-You're the one who told me to.
-Can, enough.
We don't have any power anymore.
Do you want to be fat forever?
You know what? That word hurts less
when others say it.
Are you alright? You seem distracted.
A little.
You argued?
I was wrong. I shouldn't have said that.
Fighting like children.
This is serious.
I know.
I envy you, having such close friends.
Maybe we've been friends too long.
Since Police Academy.
We've been through a lot.
I was in trouble and they saved me.
You beat him?
He broke into my house.
They might be bad
but they're your friends.
Hey, guys.
I'm sorry about yesterday.
I know I was wrong.
I'm sorry I talked to you like that.
I used to be fat too.
I'll buy you some barbecue.
Or Shabu.
MK Gold.
Please go with me.
Just one meal.
You're mad at me
because I called you fat.
Say something back.
Curse me. Punch me.
Make it even.
Don't be silent like this.
Fine! I'll do it.
I'm sorry.
Are you happy?
Enough, Can.
You had be at barbecue.
Let's go. I'm hungry.
Pluem, don't you feel anything?
Look at my shirt.
Sweating like hell.
Can. We decided.
We're done losing weight.
Are you really done?
I've thought about it. I love to eat.
I prefer eating to being a cop.
Right. I don't want
to have family problems anymore.
Besides, my wife's cooking
is worth getting fat for.
I can stay home and use my heritage.
Even if we quit...
we want you to stay.
To the fat!
Code one calls code two.
An officer was shot.
The injured man is Captain Jhet.
What happened?
We got Khem's address.
A bullet cut through his heart.
Doctors did their best to save him.
But they failed.
How could you let this happen?
I tried.
-Quit it, Captain.
Please sign the papers.
Thank you.
Too late, Captain.
A miracle. He's back from dead.
I'd like to slap him.
The director rushed this case.
Captain asked me to bring this for him.
He can work from here.
He's an asshole but I have to admit
that our boss...
is really awesome.
Let's close this case.
Yoy, what makes you say that?
I think we should repay him.
He's done a lot for us.
Haven't you forgotten something?
We're suspended.
Right. We don't have guns.
Can't call any back-up.
How can we fight?
But we do have a super cop
who has the highest arrest numbers.
Let's go find...
Lieutenant Pao.
What happened to you?
Catching a bad guy.
Jumped between buildings.
-Didn't make it?
-I did.
-Then what's up?
-The roof was old.
I fell and was badly injured.
I don't know.
You guys should go.
I heard everything.
Do it yourselves.
I don't think so.
We can't even lose weight.
That's me and my friend.
I'm on the left.
Your friend looks familiar.
He's Jhet.
Wait. What?
He said he used to be fat.
He's never changed.
What about this fat kid?
That's Tote. Our friend.
How is he doing now?
Died of diabetes many years ago.
Since we graduated,
I've worked as plainclothes cop.
After that, I gained a lot of weight.
I realized when I reached 100 kilograms,
I couldn't lose any weight.
You know what I did?
I didn't give a shit.
If I can catch bad guys,
I don't care if I'm fat or thin.
Trust me. This is the bad guy.
Yoy, It's not time to play.
It's in the movies.
The bad guy is always the closest one.
-Trust me. Plot twist.
First, let's catch Khem.
Then we might get to the boss.
Will it be that easy?
Why didn't you tell me that
before I made the board?
I saw it in the movies,
so I let you do it.
Wait for us. We'll see.
BORN - 1 MARCH 2532 B.E.
He didn't wait for us.
What do we do now?
He's dead.
Back to sleep. It's over.
No, it's not.
There's one bad guy left.
To close this case,
we have to catch him.
Let's arrest Director Charn Chai.
Fine. It's not him.
Captain Jhet released me.
He wanted to get to Khem.
But he got shot.
Khem was killed.
He killed everyone who know.
I will be next.
In that case...
being in jail is safer.
If you want to be safe,
tell us who he is.
Little man.
-White skin.
-Little and white.
-Small eyes.
-Small eyes.
Oval face. Wears a wool hat.
Oval face.
Wear a wool hat.
-I'm done.
Yes, this is him.
But his nose hair was not this long.
What did you draw?
Pluem, give me some respect.
I used to get five stars
from Mrs. Somsri in art class.
Anything else?
I don't know. He's really careful.
He shouldn't have any record.
Besides, he knew the schedule
of the money truck.
Knew the way to escape.
He prepared it for me.
From what Pong said,
he must live in this area.
Or often observe.
But where?
Where could he observe from
for a long time with nobody noticing?
That barbecue smells good.
Are you so hungry you've gone crazy?
Focus on the case.
Let's take a break and have some barbecue.
We can eat and discuss.
There's an ATM close to barbecue place.
He knew all about the schedule.
Knew the way to escape.
He prepared it for me.
If we get to Khem,
we can get to the boss.
I only met him once,
when we did the robbery.
Where could he observe from
for a long time with nobody noticing?
-Is he cold?
-Will he transform?
Barbecue smells good.
There's an ATM close to barbecue place.
-Plot twist.
-I'm the one who robbed it.
How many seats?
I'm always here but never noticed
how scary the employees look.
-What are you doing?
-I'm excited.
How are you? Is the food okay?
Enjoy your meal. I won't bother you.
Please come with me to the station.
Nothing. I just want to ask you something.
Can I go tomorrow?
I have to be here.
Today. Please cooperate.
Or I will arrest.
Arrest? What's the charge?
-Why do you think that?
I have a witness.
Do you know Khem?
Who's Khem? I don't know him.
He just arranged a funeral.
But he's still alive.
We faked the funeral to trick you.
But now, Khem is in police protection.
And he confessed the robbery plan.
Now, can you come to the station?
No, I don't believe Khem isn't dead.
You said you don't know him.
Stop puzzling and go to the station.
I can see you're busy.
Tomorrow is fine.
You overreacted.
I didn't know they had so people.
Check the bill.
Stop! Don't move.
Get down.
This is the first time
I've ever been happy to see you.
Hey, O.
-Give it to me.
It's okay. Not necessary.
Shit! The gun doesn't work.
That's why they gave it to me.
It works. You didn't unlock the safety.
Shit! The tire won't blow up.
My ears will. Wait a second.
I'll get close.
-Are you okay?
What should we do?
I don't know. He dropped the gun.
I know.
Shit! How did they get on?
Why so stubborn?
Pluem, what do we do?
This bridge again.
Can, Yoy.
Wait for it, O.
Shoot the back tire.
Put your hands up.
Yoy, get him.
-Help me.
-Don't come any closer.
-I'll put a hole in your friend's head.
-Easy. Don't make this into a big deal.
If you shoot me...
-my friend will shoot you.
-I don't care.
I won't go to jail, Fatty.
What did you say?
I said I won't go to jail, Fatty.
O, why did you shoot me?
You sent me a signal.
Who you calling fat?
Who you calling fat?
Come help me, O.
You're on suspension
and you broke orders.
You used weapons without permission.
You got into a fight.
And this time...
you did great.
They don't have
to lose their weight, right?
Work and order are not the same thing.
After catching Jong...
these four fat sergeants
still run regularly.
Wait for me.
They even eat healthy at every meal.
But they seem to be under no pressure.
Until exam day.
Pass, pass, pass, pass, pass!
They couldn't lose their weight.
Take care.
Meen, I have something to tell you.
What is it?
I want you to...
-Be your girlfriend?
-Take care of my cat.
-Just kidding.
Do you mind?
If I did, I wouldn't be here.
Confessing love at a train station.
I've seen it in the movies.
Come on.
After this dramatic goodbye,
they actually didn't go anywhere.
Luckily, their story
became popular online.
The region's director liked it.
Not only could they stay,
they also received certificates.
If I find the guy who filmed it,
I'll kiss him.
Finally, these four are back
to eating a lot again.
Who are you talking to?
You're not eating?
Calling code two.
Calling code two.
Four-one. Copy.
Something happened. Hurry.
Captain, can we eat first?
Let's go. Come on.
Hurry, Pluem.
You're not coming?
Let me eat first.
You go ahead.
Get a million views.
Shit! Flat tire.
Subtitle translation by Amiga Jenkansuk