Paddleton (2019) Movie Script

So, we took a look at your CT scans.
And we do see
a large massin your stomach
as well as several lesions
on your liver.
At this point, I recommend
that you seea specialist,
and I can help you with a recommendation
and get you a list of people.
And then go from there.
What kind of specialist?
An oncologist.
- That's the cancer one?
- Yes.
- So, you think it's bad?
- We don't really know,
which is why I think it's important
for you to see a specialist.
He'll do a biopsy, more tests and...
What do you think though?
What do you think about it?
You've seen it and all.
What do you think?
- Do you know how bad it is?
- At this point, I don't really know.
But you can tell us something, right?
Can you tell us something?
- Don't you have to say...
- It's okay.
- I don't think she...
- She doesn't...
I think... I think...
How about... All right, listen.
How about this? How about
I'm gonna make a statement?
And if it's a true statement,
you don'thave to correct me.
And you don't have
to say anythingto me.
Okay? So is what Michael has...
Dude, that's a question.
You has to be...
It has to be a statement. All right.
So, my statement is...
- what Michael has is incurable.
- That's it.
Do you understand the game?
'Cause you're not saying anything.
I don't know if that's...
I don't know...
if that's cause you understand
what we...
Did you see All the President's Men?
Um, remind me of your relationship.
How do you know each other?
Oh. Uh...
- We're, uh... We're neighbors.
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- I live on top of him.
There's still shit in the bottom of this.
Yeah, there is.
It's gross.
I'm not reaching in there.
I know. I'll get it.
And the ball's gonna be gross.
- Okay. Did you serve yesterday?
- Yeah. Yeah, it's your serve.
Hold on.
Hold on. Go.
So, uh...
that, uh, cancer thing.
- What happened with the specialist guy?
- He was special.
All right. Come on, Michael.
Don't... Don't drop it!
I'll... tell you what happened
at lunch today.
What's up?
I was at the diner next to my office.
I had that booth by the window, and...
this guy floats by the window.
Guy just floats by the window.
I mean, he floats. I mean, I just see...
I can't see his bottom.
His bottom ain't moving.
You can tell he's not moving. You know...
He floated by the window.
- He was probably on a hover board.
- Skateboard?
No, that... You know, those things
those kids do. They put it on their feet...
Yeah, I know he was on a hover board
but it just started me thinking.
Just saw a guy hover.
Can you imagine that?
That would screw up your whole life.
So, he hovered? So what?
If you saw a guy hover, so what?
Yeah, so a guy hovers.
So, life's normal for you
right after that?
I don't have a problem with it.
So, all rules of reality,
thousands ofyears of science,
everything, now means nothing?
It means nothing?
I'll be like, cool.
You wouldn't be cool.
You wouldn't be cool if a guy...
Of course I would.
No, you wouldn't.
If there was no rules.
You go to put your sneakers on,
and they're pumpkins.
You blow your nose, a nickel comes out.
You look in the mirror,
your face is a...
Is a peg board.
- I'm fine with that.
- Yeah.
I know you're bullshitting.
Give me my thing.
My hands are airplanes so just don't look.
Yeah. Well, get on one of them
and flyto fucking where guys don't hover.
Because that's where I live.
What are you doing?
That's the death punch.
Master! No!
Your death punch
is extremely powerful, huh?
Had I landed the punch,
your fate would be sealed.
Three steps in any direction,
and your heart would explode.
And then you'd be dead.
Come, young Chien.
Let's go eat.
There was, uh...
- There was five. I took three.
- That's not okay.
One's a... One's dwarf one,
so it evens out.
Sure hope to see you tomorrow night.
Yeah, Trivial Pursuit.
I won the last two of those.
Have a good night, Andy.
See you!
Good night, Michael.
Good night, Andy.
Good morning.
Thank you.
Sir, that's, uh... That's my pen.
Thank you.
- Hi.
- Hi. How are you?
I'm okay. I'm okay.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, sure.
Did you have a good weekend?
- My... My weekend?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, she did it.
- Who?
The new girl.
She said, "How are you?"
Oh, God, small talk.
How'd it go?
Horrible. It's horrible.
- Spin.
- Damn it.
your white blood count is...
Uh-huh. And what are my options?
Well, there are a few options.
I see.
Good night, Michael.
Good night, Andy.
What have I done?
You fool! Now you've done it!
You death punched your own master!
Wait? No.
I got it. I got it.
- We're a second-half team.
- Yeah. Yeah.
I could give a...
a great...
half-time speech if I was a coach. I...
I really have this best speech
I've ever heard at half-time.
- What is it?
- I'm working on it.
I think it's "fatty pork."
It's not "fatty pork." I...
- I made the shirt. I know it's not...
- You made it about two years ago.
- You still remember what it is?
- It was a year and a half ago,
and if it was "fatty pork",
there'd be two T's.
There'd be another T right there.
It's a "satay fork."
Little fork. Little appetizer fork.
No, it's not... Nothing in the kitchen.
Get out of the kitchen.
I'll give you that info, and that's it.
That's a good one.
That was a year and a half...
Sort of think...
I like that it bothers you.
Did you eat my cashews?
I have no cashews left.
I just got walnuts.
I could tell you.
Want me to tell you?
I saw the oncologist and...
I saw a second oncologist. He, um...
Long story, but they, um...
You know, there's nothing they can do.
It's that.
The dying part is...
Meh. It's meh.
The hospital, the tubes, the bloating.
I don't want any part of that.
So, I'm thinking...
before it gets bad...
I want to...
end it...
They got a whole process. If you get
less than six months they give you this...
these pills you can take.
And you can do it at home.
You know.
But I don't want to do it alone and...
I was hoping you would help me out.
Do... I mean...
The way...
You gotta... You can't give up.
Huh? You gotta...
You can't do that.
Miracles happen, right?
What about the guys who say,
"You got six months to live" and...
next thing you know,
he's climbing Mount Everest.
Jim Abbott had one arm.
Remember Jim Abbott on the Yankees?
He had one arm.
He pitched a no-hitter.
He didn't give up.
You don't give up, Michael.
They already gave me the prescription.
They can do that?
They can just give you that...
medicine that kills you?
I don't want you
to look at me like this.
But I was not gonna tell you
'cause I didn't want it
to change things, you know?
You know...
I want to make some pizzas.
I want to watch some movies.
I want to play some Paddleton.
You know?
Should we play the second half?
Yeah, right? We gotta.
It's your serve.
Lay it out.
These are all pretty far away.
What's that?
The places where your doctor said
we could fulfill the...
prescription. The closest one is...
almost six hours.
- Six hours?
- Yeah.
A lot of pharmacies won't fill it
'cause of moral reasons.
All right,
Guess we're gonna do a little road trip.
What does that mean? Road trip?
You don't just do a road trip, right?
What do you mean,
what does that mean?
We'll drive there. We'll get the meds,
we'll find a place...
Your stove burnt the pizza up. It's burnt.
Come on!
It's ruined now. It's ruined.
- Hold on.
- No, I'm not gonna.
We can't eat that.
We gotta eat something else.
- It's not that bad.
- What are we gonna eat?
- Nice work.
- Look at that piece of shit!
Ah, this is fucked!
You gonna eat that still?
It's gonna be good.
Grab a plate.
I'll try it.
All right.
How about the air in the tires?
Yeah, I put a bunch in. It's okay.
Not too much though, right?
There's no such thing as too much air.
Oh, yeah there is.
How about the Hindenberg?
That was helium.
Yeah, but it was too much.
Hey, I had some oatmeal
so I'm gonna need a bathroom in two hours.
But you also had
a second coffee, so maybe 90 minutes?
I can still see.
- What do you see?
- I see everything.
I see everything. Yeah, I do.
There's a tree. There's a...
What's that?
A person or a chicken.
If you had to live like this...
You could adapt. That's the great thing
about the human mind.
This is how bees see.
How many wishes would a genie
have to give you where...
one of those wishes would be sand off?
What's sand off?
Whenever you said "sand off"...
every grain of sand
that was on your body fell off.
Twelve hundred, maybe?
No, ten.
If they gave me ten, I would do it.
You can only think of nine wishes
before you get to sand off?
How many you need?
Okay, uh...
your first one.
All the cancer's gone.
Then a billion dollars, flying, whatever.
Invisible, and then sand off, yeah.
Well, pajamas on.
Pajamas... It's late at night,
you're tired. "Pajamas on."
You got enough gas?
There's a buffer. I think we're okay.
Well, not that big a buffer.
What's the worst case scenario?
We run out of gas.
What's the worst case scenario?
We run out of gas here, right?
Next thing you know,
we're drinking our urine.
How do you get from running out of gas,
the next step is drinking urine?
You can hitchhike. You can...
We'll call somebody.
We'll walk to the gas station.
- There's nobody out here.
- You go right to drinking urine.
It's like Twilight Zone out here.
How's that half-time speech
coming, by the way?
It's good.
Oh, yeah?
I could sell it.
But if I told it to a coach,
they'd want to buy it from me.
Hey, guys, gather around.
That's how it starts. Yeah.
- That's more like it
- That's the beginning.
That's it.
- Who is that? What's that?
- It's my sister.
She knows, right?
She knows about the cancer,
but not about the other stuff.
I kind of want to keep that
to myself.
What about me?
No, that's...
That's different. That's, you know...
- You know?
- Yeah.
I get it.
She does small talk, your sister?
The queen.
Ooh. Ostrich farm. Three miles.
- Uh, yeah.
- We're doing that.
Eh... You want to?
- I've never seen an ostrich.
- I've seen them.
- I've seen them on TV.
- Yeah, but in person, though.
They're kind of nasty, though.
- Really?
- They'll run right at you.
Fastest land animal, actually.
- I don't think it is.
- Yeah.
Yes, it is. Forty miles an hour.
The cheetah goes...
60 or 65.
Yeah. That's four legs.
Per leg...
they're the fastest.
Okay, I think we're getting close.
Looks like a tourist town or something.
A lot of windmills in this town.
You're walking really fast, Andy.
I'm not nervous.
We talk to the guy, Phil,
and we got a plan, right? Okay.
This sinus infection is so awful.
- I know.
- And I feel like I...
I feel like this medication I've taken
before and it hasn't worked.
- Give it a try, okay?
- Okay.
- Have a good rest of the day.
- Thank you.
All right. Bye, bye, Judy.
Hi, guys. What can I do for you?
Hi, there. We're here to see Phil.
Phil's not in today. I'm Dave.
I'm standing in for Phil.
We talked to Phil though.
You spoke to Phil.
Yeah, we, uh... But...
- Okay. So we should come back.
- But I can help you guys.
Yeah, but this is something...
- This is kind of top secret.
- I spoke to Phil. It's a...
He was gonna... It's a special
medication he was gonna...
- Are you Michael Thompson?
- I'm Michael. Yeah.
You want to call Phil maybe?
It's okay. I can handle it. Yeah.
Michael Thompson.
I don't like that. We should come back
for Phil. Let's come back.
Why are you so obsessed with Phil?
What if he puts something wrong
in there. Could be dangerous.
Give me one second.
I'll get you guys dialed in here.
All right. How are you guys doing today?
- There are three medicines involved.
- We know all this part.
This is what we did with Phil.
That's why...
Phil told us.
If Phil was here
he wouldn't say that to us
'cause we already spoke to him.
I understand, but Phil told me
I had to read these instructions.
It's protocol.
- Okay, go ahead.
- Thank you.
Okay, so you'll be taking two of these
one hour before taking the drink.
This one is for anxiety.
This one is for nausea.
It'll keep you from vomiting.
And this one ran all the way home.
- The little piggies.
- Yeah.
Um, and in the event of vomiting
after ingesting the drink,
the patient should have
a family member contact
their referring physician
to determine a course of action.
This big one...
is the medicine you'll be taking last.
There are 100 pills in this bottle,
which is the lethal dose.
Can you ring it up now?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on.
- You're not paying for this.
- Oh, no. Yeah.
I didn't tell you about this,
but here,take the card.
- Take the card and ring it up.
- Andy, it's $3,500.
I know what it is.
I have more money than you.
- I want to do this.
- It's a lot.
I want to do it.
Let me do it.
Thank you.
I'm sorry, sir. Your card was declined.
It's not declined.
You gotta put it through.
- You gotta run it through.
- Nice one.
- Okay.
- Can you run it through again?
My mistake. I'll give it another shot.
You know that those things glitch a lot.
- Sorry, declined again.
- Give me the card.
- Give me the card.
- I'll pay for it.
I'm just gonna call the bank up,
that's all.
- I can pay for it and you pay me back.
- Give me your phone.
Give me your phone.
Don't ring anything up,
'cause this'll take one second.
I'm gonna call the number right there.
I see the number right there. Give me
one second. Don't ring anything up.
You will have to empty the contents
of all 100 pills into a glass
- and mix them with half a cup of water.
- It's Andy Freedman.
The drink will be a little bitter,
but you want to drink it all at once.
It's me, though.
What do you want me to tell you?
I am out of town.
If the patient decides they don't...
You don't...
want to end their life after ingesting
- the medication...
- Okay.
They must contact
emergency medical services
- to begin lifesaving measures.
- I'm not yelling.
- I'll stop yelling, but I'm not yelling.
- Yeah.
Well, send it then.
They're gonna send a code.
I don't have a phone.
That's why you're supposed
to have a phone.
I have e-mail.
Can I see my e-mail on your e-mail?
Uh, Phil has his log-in codes.
I don't have it.
See? Why don't we wait for Phil?
Let's just wait for Phil to come back,
- And none of this happens.
- It's gonna be fine
Hold on. I sent you my pet name
about five years ago.
Is that it? Are we done?
Yes, yes. Uh, yeah, I read it all.
- Let me just pay for it. I got it.
- Yeah. Why...
- Where does it go?
- He's okay?
Where does my pet name go?
What are you doing?
What do you mean?
I'm taking a pain pill.
I don't know. I just...
I thought it was...
Can I help you?
Hi, we have a reservation for...
- Freedman.
- Okay.
I have it right here.
- No, I got it.
- Printed it out.
Here you are.
You're all set. I just need
a credit card for incidentals...
Okay. I'm gonna give you a credit card,
but if you could wait until the end to
do whatever you have to do with it.
I'll call the bank,
- and it's all gonna be fine.
- Let me just...
I'll get this one.
Okay, you get it.
Put it on his card, but I'm paying for it.
It's all going down.
- I'm gonna pay it all back, okay?
- That's fine.
- It's 79 a night, yes?
- It is.
Every penny.
All... I'm keeping...
- Okay.
- All right, thanks.
So, guys, I got you, um...
two queens.
- Um...
- Right.
We have another room with a king.
We don't want two rooms.
I'm sorry. Not two rooms.
Would you prefer to have a king?
If you feel more comfortable,
we're fine with that.
The queens are good.
Guess I'll take that then, right?
The bag. I'll hold the bag.
Keep it in my house
just so we know where it is.
I mean, I...
I just...
Just assumed, you know, I'd hold onto it.
I got a safe place in my closet.
Up behind the, uh...
the box. I have that...
The Rod Carew rookie card.
I got that little...
I don't think anybody's gonna steal it.
Who knows? Sandy got broken into
two times and she's on the ground floor.
They always go to the ground floor first.
I'm up on top.
If the water main breaks...
over on Hillside and then it floods,
I'm up top.
- Cash or charge?
- Cash.
You awake now?
- Sorry.
- Yeah.
I slept for a long time, sorry.
I know. It's all right.
What's this?
Tree of Wisdom.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's, uh...
Now we got nothing to worry about.
Nothing can go wrong now.
- All right, very funny.
- It was my idea.
It's very funny.
It's not funny. That's a good idea.
Where's the medication?
Where is it?
It's in there.
It's locked up.
We don't got to worry about
any of that stuff we were talking about.
What's the code?
The code to what?
There's no code.
There's a combination.
What's the combination?
No hints.
Andy, I don't want to play a game
right now.
- Can you give me the code?
- No, just don't worry about it.
This is the end here.
Maybe we should try getting a drink.
Uh, the sign-up list is still open.
Honestly, if you don't want to do
anything, it's just gonna be more of me.
We should drink more.
I think I'm gonna start drinking.
Yeah. I mean, it's not good for you,
but it is good.
So, you feeling ready?
- My speech?
- Half-time speech.
It's not ready yet.
I don't want to jinx it.
I stumbled on something
that's really gonna be something.
- Hey, Andy?
- Yeah.
Is there a half-time speech?
You think I'm lying about that?
Why would I lie about it?
Remember that time you told me you
spoke Spanish and then...
I over-exaggerated how much I knew,
but that's because I was trying
to impress you. We weren't friends yet.
I got to pee.
- Definitely get another one.
- Okay.
All right, I'll be back.
Gather round, guys.
Gather round, guys.
Take a knee.
Everybody just take a knee.
Do me a favor, guys. Close your eyes.
I want you to close your eyes.
Everybody, close your eyes.
I want you to picture something.
We're gonna lose this game.
We're gonna lose this game, guys.
Just listen to me.
I'm not gonna lie to you.
The momentum has switched.
That's a better team.
No matter what I say here,
that ain't gonna turn it around.
We're gonna lose this game.
But so what? I'm proud of you.
I'm proud of you.
I don't want to wait to the end
when you're hurting to say that.
You guy's are...
You don't need this game.
You're gonna have good lives.
You're all good guys. You're gonna...
You're gonna be something
in your life.
Murphy, you're gonna be
in the Navy, right?
You're gonna be a hero one day.
Cahill, you're a writer.
You're gonna live somewhere...
You're gonna live
in Connecticut somewhere.
By the water.
And you'll have a drinking problem maybe,
but that makes you a better writer.
It's all gonna be okay.
You're gonna have great lives,
and maybe you're gonna have a...
a little empty feeling in your gut.
And maybe when you lay at night,
secretly you're gonna think...
"You know what?
If I could go back...
This is all good,
but if I could ever go back...
If I could go back in time I would go
to the day we lost that big game
and I would play that second half
over again."
Well, guess what guys?
Open your eyes! You're back!
- Okay, now I got it.
- Oh, there he is.
- Hey.
- Hey.
How did this...
What's going on?
He was alone. Nobody likes to be alone.
I invited him.
Okay, all right.
So, now you're over here now?
- Yeah, have a little...
- Get out of my seat.
No, you stay. You sit.
Andy, take my seat.
- Cheers, guys.
- Cheers.
- Oh, yeah.
- New friends.
- Cheers, man.
- All right.
- New friends.
- New friends.
So, David was telling me
he's a kung fu fan.
- Yeah.
- Mm-hmm.
We were talking, so...
Oh, yeah. Of course. You're that too.
- All right.
- Yeah. I like kung fu. You like kung fu?
Everybody likes...
Well, have you watched Death Punch?
Yeah, I've seen Death Punch.
And what do you think?
It's pretty good. Not bad.
Not a lot of fighting in it,
you know, but...
Yeah, it's good.
It's a kung fu movie.
It's not about fighting.
It's learning about
what's inside yourself.
That's what Death Punch is.
- You didn't see that?
- I... Well, you know...
I saw it on YouTube.
Maybe I missed some parts.
And I'm back.
The sign-up list is still open.
How can you see it on YouTube?
You can't see it on YouTube.
- It's ridiculous.
- All right, well...
I don't mean to be, uh...
How can you find it on DVD?
You can find it on DVD.
You can find it on a VHS.
I recommend watching it on VHS.
- VHS? Really?
- Yes.
- Because that's how it's meant to be seen.
- Hi, everybody. My name's Michael.
The... I want to...
do some, um...
I want to honor a movie
called Death Punch.
It's my favorite movie in the world.
Nobody watches it.
We're always trying to get people
to watch it, and they don't.
Um, it's hard to find,
but it's very important to me.
Uh, so...
Yeah. Death Punch.
The movie begins on Chien,
a young kung fu student...
in the mountains. His moves
are graceful and powerful,
but something's missing.
He's not yet complete.
He's attacked by the Master Liu.
And a great battle ensues and...
And Liu winds up for what will
become known as the Death Punch.
He strikes.
But what happens is...
he actually misses...
Chien and he hits the barrel because...
Sorry, I told it wrong.
I shouldn't have...
They're the master-and-student
but you think they're enemies
and that's why it's funny
when he hits the barrel
because you think that it's, um...
I kind of messed that up, sorry.
But back to the story.
The water starts to jiggle,
and Chien sees it and he says,
"That's the fear of..." Um...
But, anyhow, this is kind of where
you have to see the movie.
Sorry. Um...
Anyway, it's a cool shot
because the barrel starts to shake, right?
It's rumbling. It's going crazy and...
And suddenly,
the barrel explodes with water.
Oh! He's soaked.
If I had landed that punch,
your fate would have been sealed.
Three steps in any direction,
and your heart would explode.
And then you'd be dead.
Chien, he's stubborn and he learns
the Death Punch anyway, by himself.
Alone he learns it.
On the hill without a shirt on.
- Yeah, that part where he trains.
- Right.
- But then...
- The ninjas come.
Ku Woo Tai shows up with 15 ninjas.
- Exactly 15.
- Exactly 15 ninjas.
Yes, and put him in a chokehold.
Here you go. You avoid it.
Then he goes, no.
Oh, it burns.
- What have I done?
- Do you see what happens?
I think we're this way.
Over here.
What time is it?
Eleven. Almost eleven.
- It's closed.
- Yeah, it's closed.
Closes at ten.
I'll fucking do it.
- That's hot.
- I love it.
I love it.
Smells though, right?
Does it smell a little? Like meat.
What do you mean you smell meat?
You don't get that?
- We're in a pot like soup.
- I don't smell it.
Like people soup.
Let's get some people in here.
I'm gonna go to the bar.
I'm gonna get the open-mic girl,
and I'm gonna get David.
- Oh, no.
- Go get your friend David.
You're not gonna get David.
I almost killed that guy,
and he said, uh...
I'm sorry, I was just trying to...
- Oh, it's not your fault.
- No, I was, you know...
Oh, shit. The lady's here.
Duck. Duck, duck, duck.
Get under water.
Hey, guys.
- Hi.
- The pool's closed.
- Closed at nine.
- All right.
Sorry, we're gonna get out.
- Yeah, are you drinking?
- Okay.
- Don't come over.
- That's against the rules.
No, we're... You don't want to see...
- I'm getting in.
- No.
- No.
- What?
Is three company?
You guys are so adorable.
You know that?
I mean, like from the very first moment,
when you checked in, we could really feel
that you were totally in love.
It's really sweet.
Oh, no.
It's beautiful.
- We're just...
- We're not...
We're friends, right?
We're not that way. We're...
- We love those guys.
- Everybody's beautiful.
- We're neighbors. So...
- We're just neighbors.
But everything's okay
- with the rest of the world.
- And it's great.
It was such a strong thing
that we just assumed.
- I'm sorry.
- Who is that?
"We"? Who's "we"?
Oh, me and my husband.
Oh, so we... Okay, we're not
wearing clothes, so we're...
He got naked so I got naked.
That's the only reason I got naked.
- Where is he?
- He's right here.
- What do you mean?
- What do you mean he's right here?
- He's all around here.
- Wait a minute.
He's not like invisible, right?
- No.
- Don't say that.
He passed away a few years ago.
Yeah. We ran this place together
for a long time, and he's here.
So, I'm here with him.
I'm so sorry.
I just blurted out, like...
Sorry, I'm just bad at small talk.
I've never been good at it.
- I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.
- I hate it.
I hate small talk.
I work in an office,
and that's all they do.
- Yeah. I don't like it.
- So stupid, right?
I keep trying to think of some kind of
better opening conversation line.
I've been worrying about
how to really do it. Something like...
You want to talk? If you don't, it's okay.
Well, yeah. Or like...
I see you.
And now I'm gonna go over here.
You're so cute.
All right, I'm gonna hit the hay, guys.
- No.
- Where you going?
- We just got started...
- I gotta get some rest.
Okay, well, we have to go.
- You don't have to come. You can stay.
- No, I'm gonna go.
- I'm gonna go, too.
- I'm just gonna go sleep in the room.
- You have to be quiet.
- You go.
You stay.
- Yeah, I'm gonna go.
- No, Mike.
Oh! Oh, Jesus.
I don't have a key, though.
I don't have a key.
It's okay. I got a lot of keys.
You got a lot of them in the...
Yeah, but...
All right.
That's cute.
Yeah, you...
- I was wrong.
- I'm sorry for that.
What about him?
'Cause we're over here
and he's over there, right?
Yeah, well, he's always with me.
he's also gone.
- No.
- No, it's okay. It's all right.
Hey, Michael.
Hey, Michael.
Michael. Hey, Michael.
Hey, Michael.
- Why'd you wake me up?
- Why are you screaming?
You scared me.
I scared you?
You looked like you were dead.
You thought...
I couldn't see you breathing.
- Hey.
- Sorry.
- How'd it go?
- What?
In the hot tub?
Ah, come on.
It was fun, though.
Good night. Uh-oh.
Good night. Uh-oh.
Good night.
Hey, Michael,
I need an aspirin or something.
My head. I got...
I was a little drunk.
Excuse me, miss.
- Did you see the guy...
- Hey, good morning.
What are you... You're over here?
Yeah. I was looking at the fire.
I was waiting for you to get up.
- I thought we'd get some pancakes.
- Oh, you're watching the fire?
Yeah, you ever just watch a fire?
- So nice.
- Yeah. You should've woke me though.
- You okay? What's wrong with you?
- All right. Whatever.
I'm all right. I'm hungry, that's all.
What do you want to do?
Why are you sweating?
I went outside.
I thought you were down there.
I went down the block. I saw...
I saw a bunch of people, you know?
Want to do the pancakes?
- All right. Let me go to the room.
- I want pancakes. All right.
Andy, what are you doing?
What do you mean, "What're you doing"?
I just got to...
wash up or something.
What's the matter?
You know, you keep...
- What about it?
- You keep taking it.
first of all,
I'm taking it back.
- You took it this morning.
- That's mine.
No, it isn't yours.
Because I bought it.
All right? I bought it.
You bought the safe,
but the medication is mine.
- No, I bought the medication, too.
- That's the important part.
- Right?
- You did not buy the medication.
- I didn't say...
- You tried to buy it.
- I swiped the card.
- I didn't say I'm paying for it?
- You said you were.
- We have a witness.
You said it. But I'm the one whose...
- Whose bank account got charged?
- Oh, so I lied?
I'm paying for it. It's mine.
- It's mine.
- Just give it to me.
- We don't have...
- What are you doing?
I'm gonna hold it, that's all.
You're running away from me?
Give me the...
What, are you chasing me?
You're chasing me.
I'm not chasing you. You're walking.
Stop moving around the table.
Stop moving.
Just stop it, all right?
- I'm not...
- Stop it. This is stupid.
I got the bad knee.
You know I got the bad knee.
You know I'm gonna catch you
if you want me to.
You better stop.
- Andy! Andy!
- I'll tell you right now, I won't stop.
- I'm holding it.
- Look at me.
That's mine.
- I want it.
- Okay.
Um, maybe it is yours.
I need to hold it.
All right?
I don't know why you're making
a big deal out of it.
Because I'm the dying guy.
- I'm the dying guy.
- Okay. All right.
You can't keep saying that.
But you keep taking that.
- I'm the dying guy.
- Shut up with that.
Then give me the safe.
- You're being a stupid idiot.
- I'm being stupid? I'm the dying guy.
- Shut up!
- I'm the dying guy.
- I know you're the dying guy. Stop.
- I'm the dying guy!
I'm the other guy!
There's 32 dogs.
Twenty ate cats.
How many didn't?
Two dogs and 20...
Thirty-two dogs. Twenty of them ate cats.
It's 12.
That was easy.
I'm so smart.
One, two, three, four.
That's not the code.
- The code is one, two, three, four?
- See? You're not that smart.
Should've got it.
I can't...
I can't be normal...
through all of this. I just can't.
All right.
Your stove is still acting stupid.
I think I might have burnt it a little
on the bottom, but I think it's okay.
They're still fighting here?
There's more fighting
in this than I remember.
Your friend Dave would love it.
It's gonna get cold.
I'll get it in a sec.
I can re-heat it.
Tiger style.
Chien, when you woke this morning,
did you think it would be
for the last time?
Still got it.
- Can I open them?
- Biggest surprise of your life.
- Ah!
- Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to Andy.
The cupcake...
that I bought. Thank you.
- All right.
- Wish.
Make a wish.
You still got cancer
that's killing you?
- I think so.
- Yeah.
See? It never works.
You should've gone with sand-off.
You gonna have some?
I don't think so.
Doesn't smell like orange.
- You all right?
- Yeah.
Feels like there's a little more.
- Really?
- It's like, just...
I don't know.
It doesn't all come, you know?
- It feels better, though.
- Yeah.
You don't have to
sit in here if you don't want to.
No, it's...
It sounded like you got
all of it out, though.
It is River Kickers.
They're scamming.
You were right.
The one from the gas station
is River Kickers.
- Hey, Michael.
- Hmm? What?
It's River Kickers.
Which way to the ancient healer?
I think I'm ready.
I want to go when I feel good.
I don't want to go when it's hurting.
But you're feeling good.
Yeah, but it's not gonna stay that way.
You know, I'd like to do it when I feel...
I think I'm ready.
I should have took off from work.
You know, I should have took off.
A month ago.
We could've done more stuff.
We could've done more stuff.
I wish I had done that.
Did you hear my speech?
My half-time speech. Huh?
Let me guess, it's...
- Guys...
- You're never gonna guess it.
Guys, you...
We're gonna lose, but...
You know, go back...
Go forward in your life
and imagine where you are
and if you had a chance...
How do you know that?
You're my best friend. I know you.
Also, I heard you practicing it
through the vent about 100 times.
That fucking vent.
You seem really good right now.
You know, you seem like...
Maybe there's... I don't know.
I know.
- I'm ready.
- I know.
- So, 100 of these suckers.
- Yeah.
I don't even know
if you had to buy this particular pill.
A hundred of anything, really, would...
You know?
- These are really hard to...
- Yeah.
I wonder if they do that...
on purpose, you know?
You think anybody's ever died...
while they were emptying these?
- You're spilling it on the side now.
- Oh, sorry.
Well, you spilled it now.
Well, sorry. We got to go back now, right?
I was married once.
- Are you kidding me?
- Uh-uh.
- You never told me that?
- I never told anybody that.
Why didn't you tell me?
How long?
- Year and a half.
- Yeah?
I used to feel so bad about it.
I really...
I thought I wanted that...
that life. I really...
And I was...
I left her. It was awful.
And then I thought...
"Oh, I know I need to be alone.
I'm convinced. That's what I need to do.
I need to be alone."
I thought that for sure.
And then I ended up here...
with you.
And I knew.
Like, "This is my spot.
This is where I belong."
When you first came...
and you were looking at this apartment
- when Barry was showing it to you...
- Yeah.
I saw you.
Yeah, I didn't want you to get it.
I know, you looked...
You look weird.
Yeah, I mean, I didn't know you were
gonna be a cool guy and everything.
I told Barry you look like
one of those guys...
you know, you see on he news.
He's got a...
He's got a freezer full of hands and feet.
I told Barry, I said,
"Eh, why don't you keep looking?"
It's all right.
I've seen people
look at me like that in...
a Rite Aid or something.
- People look at me like that all the time.
- Yeah.
Oh, God. We gotta deal with this.
I mean, it's now or never, so...
I'll just tell you if you want.
I don't think
you're gonna like it though.
- You never know.
- I hope you do.
- It's "fatty pork."
- No, it's not "fatty pork."
- It's "fatty pork."
- It's not "fatty pork."
What is it?
It's nothing.
Yeah, I did that.
There's no answer?
No, there's no answer,
- but I have a reason.
- Two years?
- Why would you do that to me?
- Because when we do puzzles...
it's a lot of work and...
it's hard, but it's fun.
And there's a finish.
There's something real you can finish.
I know, but you always look sad
when we'd finish.
- I don't look sad. No, I don't.
- You always look a little sad.
You don't see it. I see it.
We're happy, we're done, we got it.
And then you get a little sad.
I thought, "You know what?
He'll never get it.
He'll never get this shirt.
This will be his favorite shirt."
- Got any other confessions?
- No.
I thought you were a killer. I...
gave you a shirt with no answer.
That's it. I'm clean now.
Come on, that's the last one. We got to...
All right.
What's the next step?
"Fill the glass
with four ounces of water."
That's the lethal dose.
And you dilute it.
It's bitter, so you're gonna
drink it all at once.
And then...
in a few minutes,
- you fall asleep.
- Yeah.
- And then a few minutes later...
- I remember that part.
Then there's, um...
The yellow one is for anti-vomiting.
That's the thing. If you vomit
this up then it's all for nothing.
This is for anti-anxiety.
If you take it and then...
I don't want that.
I want to be in my head.
- All right, I'll keep this.
- I don't need that but I'll take this.
All right.
Takes an hour. After you take that pill...
I got to wait an hour after?
You got to wait an hour
for that to take effect, yeah.
All right, we should have taken...
Let me go... Hold on. Hold on.
- Go ahead.
- Tell me when you swallow it.
Now, so we just wait an hour?
Hmm. You got to wait an hour.
Yeah, you should feel free
to sell the car.
Yeah, maybe.
I don't think
you should be driving, anyway.
I do think you should keep
my phone though.
- Nah, I don't want it.
- What do you mean, "nah"?
Don't you think it's time
you get a phone?
Yeah, I'll get one.
I don't want yours.
You don't get e-mail right?
You can't get e-mail on it.
Nothing wrong with my phone.
There's nothing wrong.
I'll keep it. I just want a good one.
You don't even know
how to do e-mail on a phone.
- You don't know what you're doing.
- It comes with instructions, right?
- Yeah, don't do that.
- What?
- What are you doing?
- I'm smelling a tree.
- I haven't smelled it before.
- There's bugs.
What's it gonna do to me now?
I don't know. There's a lot of larvae
and stuff on there.
There's something I do want
to talk to you about that...
I don't think you're gonna like...
I don't believe...
but if there's an after...
and I could somehow contact you...
You know, like the woman in the hotel.
She hangs out with her husband, you know.
She's saying what she feels.
You don't mean real. I mean, that's...
- That's just in movies and stuff, right?
- But on the...
.001 chance...
would you want me to...
contact you?
This is...
This is a tough one for me.
- I don't know.
- I could send you a signal.
- Yeah.
- You know?
Push the water glass a little bit or...
- leave you a note in the foggy mirror...
- No. No, don't do that.
No, no. Do not do that.
Nothing sudden or, you know...
Nothing at midnight.
No moaning through the vent.
No, "woo."
Although now...
You know, you did now.
Now I'm just gonna think anything weird...
I'm gonna think it's you.
The wind, it's you.
The light flickers, it's you.
Let's just pick something right now,
so I know everything else...
That's what I was getting at
in the first...
I'm winded.
I just realized something.
I never talked about...
Yeah, no. We didn't.
I guess you could just...
- There's no instructions.
- No.
I guess we could do it on the couch.
I mean, I'm here.
I mean, that makes sense, right?
It's, uh...
- It's our spot.
- It's our place, right? Yeah.
I don't want to do it on the couch.
All right. Okay.
If I was on the floor,
I'd be closer to the door.
- For when...
- If that's what you want.
I took, you know...
I don't want to do it on the floor.
All right.
- Hmm? You all right?
- Yeah.
You all right? You want me to...
I want to do it in here.
- On the bed.
- Okay.
- All right.
- Can you get the drink?
Yeah, okay.
If you feel...
It's okay.
Wanna lay down?
- Should I lay down?
- You wanna lay down?
Okay. Yeah.
Okay. All right. Okay.
I'm starting to...
I'm shaking a little bit.
It's okay. It's, uh...
I'm getting a little scared.
Yeah, you don't have to be scared.
I think it's gonna be okay.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
- I'm scared.
- I don't think you gotta get scared, Mike.
I think it's gonna be okay.
I shouldn't have taken the pill.
I know.
It's gonna be all right.
Yeah, but you don't know.
No, I do. I do.
It's gonna be okay, Michael.
It's okay, man.
- It's gonna be okay. All right.
- Okay.
I'm okay.
You're doing good.
Yeah, I know. 'Cause I know.
I got a feeling.
I got a feeling, man.
I got a feeling about this.
Give me your hand.
Oh, my God. I'm already...
Give me your hand. Hey.
I want to tell you I love you.
- It's okay.
- Okay.
I feel good.
I feel okay.
You're gonna be okay.
- You know?
- Okay.
It's okay, Michael.
- Hey, Andy?
- Yeah?
I'm gonna close my eyes now, okay?
- Yeah?
- Okay?
- Okay.
- All right.
I love you, too, Michael.
Are you sure?
See you down the road, friend.
You in C?
Uh, yeah. We're moving into C.
I'm going over there so...
Thank you.
- So you are in what apartment?
- I'm in F.
- F?
- Yeah, that's upstairs.
- Oh, right above us.
- Uh-huh.
- Hey, thank you so much.
- All right. Yeah.
You got the best apartment, actually.
Oh. You hear that? Best apartment.
You're lucky, actually,
that you got this one.
Is that you?
It's Evan?
You can answer him. Tell him.
It's all right.
He doesn't have to. I'm Andy.
- Kiersten, hi.
- Okay.
So, I guess you like games then,
Evan, huh?
- Yeah.
- You ever play Paddleton?
- Paddleton?
- Yeah.
- No.
- No. 'Cause we made it up.
- Yeah.
- How do you play?
Like, it's like paddle ball,
but you gotta imagine
this whole wall here, right?
You hit a ball against it.
And you got to get it into a barrel
that's over here.
We put a barrel right there.
And, uh, it doesn't sound
like a lot of fun, but it is.
It's good. It's fun. Yeah.
I'll show you one day.
All right.
Thank you so much.
- Nice to meet you.
- Yeah, you too.
I got a great
football half-time speech, too.
- If you ever need it.
- Okay.
Yeah. It's a good one.