Pickleballers (2026) Movie Script
1
(dramatic music)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
(cheerful music)
(birds chirping)
(dog barking)
The sun is shining on me
Not a cloud in the sky
Not a reason to worry
'Cause the sun is shining on me
There's this big blue, beautiful sky
It's got me singing
Nothing here is ever
gonna bring me down
I said nothing here is
ever gonna bring me down
It's just the sun sunshiny day
A sun sunshiny day
A sun sunshiny
(upbeat music)
- Hey, there.
Figured I'd stop
everything here and say hi.
My name is Max.
And yes, that poor innocent
paperboy is perfectly fine.
(feet shuffling)
Eh, I'm sure he'll be fine?
Anyway, all you need to know
is this guy's name is Dylan
and Dylan is an asshole.
(trash clattering)
(feet shuffling) (birds chirping)
Oh, are you serious.
You got me Dillard.
- It's Dylan.
(birds chirping)
- Thank you.
So again, guys, we just,
wait.
And I'm greeted by
your cute little smile
The world is new with you by my side
Everything is beautiful
Tuesday afternoon,
I'm calling you home
Just to hear your voice on the phone
- Say you're sorry, Max.
I think of you and I'm not alone
You are everything
Under the sky so blue
- Tell him how sorry you are, Max.
I found a piece of heaven
- I'm sorry. Spending my days with you
You are my piece of heaven
- If anybody else had
responded to this call,
you'd be in the back
of a cruiser right now.
Waking up with you in my arms
I've got it all and nothing's a miss
- It's on the house.
Everything is beautiful
Sunday morning snooze
With breakfast in bed - Okay.
And I listen to the song in my head
It sings of you
And the things that you do - Just
'Cause you are everything
- What are you doing?
- I was just getting coffee.
- Seriously, Max.
He was gonna press charges.
- Over what?
Me spilling some cold brew on him.
- You know they have
security cameras here, right?
(upbeat music)
- Like I said,
I just spilt some cold brew.
- Why are you being like this?
- Fine.
I found it at school.
He was the one telling people that dad
was selling drugs that night.
So I told him nicely to stop lying.
- And?
- Andy asked if dad had
any drugs buried with him
so he could get a free hit.
- Wow.
Okay.
Just,
I get it now.
How did you even lift that thing?
Those cakes weigh like 50 pounds.
- Probably because of all the
cocaine I did on the way here.
- Oh yeah. Great.
That's a relief.
I thought it was something alarming.
Like you started a school sport
or going to the gym just,
- Nope.
- Well, I can't take you home.
Your sister doesn't get home
for another hour and a half.
Wanna help me improve
my shooting accuracy?
Can I shoot too?
- Sure.
- Yes.
(groovy music) (bowling pins clattering)
- What?
- You know what.
- Do you really think I was
gonna give you a loaded gun
after finding out you just dumped
two gallons of cold brew
on top of a teenager?
- Obviously.
I'm worried about you.
- Mm.
- How's it looking down there?
- Bingo. Okay.
Here you go, Max, Officer Kenny.
Hi.
You guys are gonna be over at Lane 10.
- Thank you, random citizen.
- Anytime man.
Hey Max, you wanna know why
I put you over at Lane 10?
- Why?
- Because, - Why?
- Because you're the only 10 I see.
- Thank you,
strange, awkward bowling attendant guy.
- Oh.
Okay.
- You guys make a cute couple.
- Stop.
(feet shuffling)
(groovy music continues)
- Hey, dude.
You didn't tell us you were coming.
- Relax. It wasn't planned.
We were just stopping here
before he brought me to prison.
- Are you giving a presentation?
What?
- Charlotte,
are you playing this time or not?
- No, Mr. Kenny.
There's been at least 15 deaths
by pin setter machine since 1984.
- Okay.
- Hey, Spence.
Isn't that that girl you
pretend you don't like,
but we all know you actually like her?
I was tempted
Tempted by your smile
I was
- No, I just talk to her sometimes
'cause she's the only girl at school
that watches balloon shop.
- And because you're in love with her.
- That is not true.
(Kenny grunting)
- Huh?
- Why is my name spelled Mex?
(Spence laughing)
- [Kenny] Are you kidding?
Damn it.
Where's that bowling kid?
- What?
Every step we take is tic tac toe
Tic tac toe
- I freaking hate Rachel Summers.
- I freaking hate Rachel Summers too.
- My parents said Rachel Summers
is going to hell when she dies.
(gentle music)
- Hey.
So I'm gonna have to have you
guys move over the lane 15.
- No way.
That's the lane next to Creepy Steve.
- Who's Creepy Steve?
- The guy on Lane 16 named
Steve, who is creepy?
- I have to give the lane to Mr. Summers.
I'm sorry.
- Why can't you move him over to Lane 15?
Because his daughter doesn't wanna bowl
right next to Creepy Steve.
Are you kidding me?
- Max, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, okay.
It's just,
I've had three birthday
parties this morning
and the urinal is so filled with poop.
I've covered it up with a garbage bag
and I don't know when I'm
going to take care of that.
So please,
please just move the lane 15, please.
- You suck.
- I know.
(feet shuffling)
(bag thuds)
- Thank you so much for
letting us have your lane, Maxine.
- Yeah. It was so generous of you.
- Oh, anytime.
It's the least I can do
after having such a nice conversation
with your boyfriend this afternoon.
(bag thuds)
(group laughing)
- I am not gonna lie,
this is probably the
closest I've ever come
to adding one more death
statistic via pin setter.
(engine rumbling)
(doors banging)
(feet crunching)
(door banging)
- What happened to you?
Hi, Miss Sabrina.
Hey Sabrina.
- Miss Sabrina,
can you please not tell my parents
that a police officer drove me home?
- I am so confused.
Kenny, what's going on?
- That is a bit of an interesting story.
- Do tell.
I've gotta stay like this
'Cause if I don't, then it'll show
- [Miss Sabrina] Can I come in?
- I'll be down in a couple of minutes.
- Hey.
- Kenny told me what happened?
- [Max] Can you please save
the lecture for tomorrow?
- I am not here to yell at you.
Here to make sure you're okay.
- I'm fine.
I just,
I don't like when people talk about him,
especially like that.
- Yeah, I get it.
Let's try to work on some boundaries, huh?
Maybe cap out anything
larger than a coffee pot.
- The two gallons felt so good though.
- I don't doubt it,
but it's not actually
gonna make you feel better.
Try to remember that for
next time if you can.
(feet shuffling)
Anyway, if you're in
need of a healthy outlet,
we're all set up downstairs
for what usually works.
(door banging) (feet clomping)
(Spence breathing heavily)
(feet clomping) (dramatic music)
- All right.
She's gonna be angry, aggressive,
unstable, and unpredictable.
But we signed up for this
and we'll probably recover emotionally
in at least a couple years.
- Let's try not to die.
(dramatic music continues)
(feet shuffling)
- I know.
They're crazy.
(dramatic groovy music)
(dramatic groovy music continues)
(item beeping) (Spence screaming)
- Die demon. (Spence panting)
This girl is going to
give me a heart attack.
(dramatic groovy music continues)
(corn popping)
(Spence screaming)
No.
No.
Oh God, me?
Okay.
Maybe she didn't get me.
- I'm pretty cool.
Spence, you ain't got got again.
You missed.
That's what you did.
You missed.
(thunder crackling)
(Spence screaming)
- Everything's fine.
Spencer's just probably pretending
to be Rambo like last time.
(ball bouncing)
(thunder crackling)
(feet shuffling)
- Finally.
Got you.
(feet shuffling)
(doorbell dings)
(toy gun firing)
Are you kidding me?
(feet shuffling)
(door creaking)
Can I help you?
- Hello.
My name is Leon Mueller from Mueller Law.
Are your parents home?
- Nope.
- Is there an adult here
that I can speak with?
- Yes.
That'll be me.
- Is there maybe a more
grownup adult here?
- No.
I am 25 and an adult.
- So are your parents like
gonna be home soon or,
- Well, our father died a year ago
and my mom hasn't been home in 15.
So no, just me.
- Right.
So you are the legal caregiver
for Maxine Dangerfield?
- Yes.
That's me, the adult.
- Okay then.
Mr. Summers is filing suit against Maxine
unless all damages accrued to his shop
and his staff are paid for in full.
The total damages acquired this afternoon
are total to $25,000.
This breakdown right here
is itemized in this envelope
so that you can go ahead
and take a look at that.
You have 30 days to pay
for everything in full
or else this will progress
into a criminal case against Maxine.
- But we don't have $25,000.
- Then I suggest you get a good lawyer.
(door banging)
(engine rumbling)
- Max.
- Of course, he went and cried
to his stupid girlfriend.
- This is insane.
They're charging you for
psychological damage.
- You could probably just
go to church for that one.
- And this, why would they
charge you for a machine
if it's a, you know,
if it's a piece of shit?
- It stands for point of sale, Spence.
- Oh.
- Max, I'm gonna need you to go
to Mr. Summer's office
tomorrow and try to resolve this.
- No way.
I'm not gonna go and
beg to someone like him.
- Well, it doesn't matter if you want to,
we don't have this kind of money.
- Are you seriously expecting me
to go and grovel to that asshole?
I can't believe I'm about to
go and grovel to that asshole.
Excuse me.
Hello.
- Are your parents here?
- I need to speak with Mr. Summers.
Do you have an appointment?
- No.
- Unfortunately Mr. Summers
only has time for scheduled appointments.
- Do you mind at least asking
if he could meet with me?
- Name please.
- Max Dangerfield.
- Hello, Mr. Summers,
I have a Max Dangerfield
here wanting to speak with you.
He said you can head back.
- Thanks.
- Of course. Of course, Anthony.
What's the point in having five yachts
if you don't got your own
private island to dock 'em on.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah. All right.
Okay. Big guy.
Talk soon.
Miss Dangerfield, what can I do for you?
- I was just looking
to see if we could talk
about the paperwork you
dropped off yesterday.
- Yeah. Yeah.
The coffee shop. Right, right.
You know, I had Leon go
over that 16 different ways
just to make sure, you know,
we dotted our t's crossed our I's,
and sounds to me like you're
saying we miscalculated.
- No was just seeing if maybe there was
another way that we could solve this.
- I hate to be the bearer
of bad biscuits here, Maxy,
but we got a saying,
if you don't got the dime,
you don't commit the crime.
You know what I'm saying?
- I don't really. No.
- Okay.
Let me put it to you this way, kiddo.
I don't wanna do this.
I don't wanna be Mr. Bad Guy.
Nobody likes when Mr. Bad Guy shows up.
But Max, you broke a lot
of my stuff yesterday.
You upset a few people.
You know what I'm saying?
(feet shuffling)
Listen, if you need a little
help coming up with the money,
we can talk about selling
that house of yours.
You know, Maxy,
I wish I could help you out,
I really do,
but you know, my hands, they're tight.
There she is.
My little gum drop.
Come over here. Gimme a kiss.
(door creaking and banging)
(gentle music)
(feet shuffling)
- Then he suggested we sell
the fricking house to break even
as if that would ever happen.
- It's a shame your dad didn't divorce
your mom before he died,
then you guys would've had
all that settlement money.
- Thanks, Charlotte.
- I'm just saying it would've helped.
- Okay.
- I know it's a little bit extreme, okay,
but what if we just
like hire a hit man to kill Mr. Summers?
- Interesting approach.
I like the idea, but I do
think that if we are struggling
to come up with the money
to pay off Mr. Summers,
that hiring a hitman to kill him
would be substantially more expensive.
- But if Mr. Summers is dead,
- We still have to pay the hitman, Spence.
And maybe our only option.
- Hiring a hitman?
- No.
Selling the house...
- Are you serious?
- I don't see how else we're gonna come up
with that kind of money.
- How could you even consider that?
- Max, did you read all of the paperwork?
Like, did you see the
charges if we don't pay them?
You turn 18 this year,
you could actually go to jail.
You do understand that, right?
- I am not letting them take this house.
- You don't get to make that statement
when you're the reason we're in this mess.
(somber music) (feet shuffling)
(door banging)
- How the hell could she say that?
She doesn't care at all.
It doesn't matter.
She'll figure something out.
I'm not letting that
scumbag take our house.
- What's a scumbag?
- Forget it.
You wouldn't understand?
(kids chattering)
- Max,
Max, just stop for a second, please.
Jesus.
(Spence panting)
I can't breathe.
- What?
- I thought something you could do.
- Oh yeah. Is it to buy a yacht
and then sell that for the damage money?
- No.
Balloon Shop.
Max. Wait, I'm serious.
- What?
How is your internet show
gonna get me $25,000?
This month's competition
has a huge cash price.
- Oh yeah.
How big?
- $25,000.
- Are you serious?
- Yes. Why do you think I
ran all the way over here.
- It was only across the street, Spence.
- Wait.
What is the competition?
- I don't know.
It's something called Pickleball.
- The hell is pickleball.
- I don't know.
That's some kind of sport or something.
- What sport could they
possibly play with pickles?
- I don't know Charlotte.
But Max needs $25,000 and
they have a $25,000 grand prize.
- I'm not gonna play pickleball, Spence.
- Okay.
What other ideas do you have?
- None.
- So why not pickles then?
- Fine.
Yes.
- How do I get in?
- That,
that's the trickier part.
So, as you know,
Balloon Shop's gotten a little crazy,
but apparently Veronica knows
the guy who runs the show.
- So can you talk to her?
- Yeah, Veronica.
Yeah, of course, I can talk to her.
Yeah. Duh.
Obviously, stupid.
I can talk to Veronica. Duh.
- Why'd your mouth stop working?
(upbeat music)
(door knocking)
- Well, guess they're not home.
Maybe we could just
come back another time.
- What do you want?
- Hi.
- Is Veronica home?
- [Parent] Veronica,
(speaks in foreign language)
- Mama, I got it.
(latch clicking)
- Oh, hi.
How can I help you guys?
Wait, you were the kids from
the bowling alley, right?
Don't you go to Winter Garden High?
- We do.
I sit behind you in physics and pre-Cal.
And last Tuesday you
borrowed my Starfish pencil.
- Yeah, I think I still have that pencil.
- I know.
I was too intimidated to ask for it back,
so I decided never to
speak of it ever again.
- Oh.
Well, I'm sorry.
- Spence, the show.
- I gotta go.
(feet shuffling)
- See, I told you he could run fine.
- What's going on?
- I know that we don't know each other,
but Spence mentioned that
you both watch Balloon Shop
and that you might happen
to know the guy that runs the show.
- He watches Ballon Shop too.
I thought I was the only one
at school who watched it.
Really?
- Yeah.
I wish he would've said something.
But anyway, my older brother runs it.
Why?
- I know that this is a long shot,
but I really like, really need
to get into this competition.
Is there any way that
you could talk to him?
- Yeah. I don't see why not.
Lee had to start getting kind of serious
after what happened two years ago,
but I'm sure it's fine.
What's your name?
- Max.
- Wait, what's your team name?
Team name?
- For pickleball.
What's your name?
- Oh yeah, of course.
It's the Pickleballers.
It's the Pickleballers.
- Solid. Yeah.
Pretty simple.
I'll tell him to add
your name to the list.
- Oh, and tell your friend
to come talk to me about the show, okay.
- Okay.
- I guess we're in.
(students chattering)
- Are you sure this guy is any
good, Spence?
- Absolutely.
It says he's the best
friend on his website.
- Like he says he's the best
or other people have said it?
- Why aren't you worried about the fact
you don't have a partner
for a team competition
for a sport you don't know how to play.
Now stop worrying about the trainer.
- I don't think this is a good idea, Max.
65,000 people have gone to the ER
with pickleball related
injuries just this year.
- Jesus. Is pickleball like an
extreme sport or something?
- Knowingly,
what he's done on Ballon Shop,
I wouldn't be surprised.
- Ola Compadres.
You three must be today's trainees.
My name is Pickleball Pete,
and I'm the best pickleball
coach this side of the highway.
- I can see that
- I'm gonna have you guys dinking
and doing Bernie's
faster than you can say Pickleball Pete.
- It's actually illegal to
drink and drive Mr. Pickleball.
- It's not illegal to pickleball yet.
I'm just kidding guys. Let's go.
- Okay, let's go.
- We're gonna do Bernies, guys.
Come on.
(feet shuffling)
(dramatic music)
- Pickleball looks a lot like tennis.
- That is tennis dummy.
The real games over there.
(ball bouncing)
What did I tell you?
Sport of kings and queens too, of course.
Come on.
- Yes.
Now, that's an awesome looking sport.
- I don't understand what this
has to do with drinking and driving,
but seems safe enough.
- [Max] I don't know what I was expecting,
but it definitely was not this.
(upbeat music)
There's a girl in the
room with no clothes on
She can be cooler, out of her mind
Give that girl a kiss
and have a good time
Come here and rock and
roll and have a big smile
Whoa
Whoa
- [Max] So what I was
beginning to realize,
regardless of Pickleball Pete's
completely useless instruction
is that pickleball
seems a lot like tennis.
- You can't handle this. (laughing)
You turn Max.
- [Max] And I played
tennis for eight years.
- Just like I showed you.
(upbeat music continues)
- Holy,
- It was so much fun.
If I had known pickleball
was that much fun,
I would've started playing
a couple years ago.
Could've been a pro by now.
- Can't be a pro after only
a couple years, Spence.
- You don't know that.
- Spence, what even is Balloon Shop?
- Oh, it's great.
It's this online game show
that has like this crazy host and stuff.
Anyway, they do these insane competitions.
I had no idea that
everything happens right here
until I overheard Veronica
talking about how her
brother runs the show.
- Why'd you run away from her
house, by the way?
- I didn't.
I just forgot I had a
doctor's appointment, guys.
- Telling the truth is always easier.
- Fine. Okay.
I don't actually know Veronica,
just,
she's just pretty, okay,
and she's cool and she's funny and and fun
and everything that would
make her not like me.
So, I don't know.
I just pretended we were friends.
- I don't know, Spence.
I think you're pretty funny.
- And you're gonna be
professional pickleball players soon.
That'll make you pretty cool.
- Guess I am kind of funny.
Oh, I have to show you an
episode of Balloon Shop.
Here.
No idea what you're missing out on.
- What's up, guys?
It's your boy, Lee here,
and welcome back to Ballon Shop.
Not in my house.
Come on, baby.
Oh pow.
(Lee laughing)
Anyway, it's time to talk about
this month's big competition.
How big we talking?
Not today.
Pow.
(Lee laughing)
$25,000 kind of big baby.
Now we've done some extreme
competitions in the past.
Bowl wrestling, Ninja Star Dutch ball,
hell, we even played Russian
Roulette, (laughing)
but we haven't done anything like this.
This month, we are going real extreme.
This month we are going crazy.
Oh no, baby.
Ooh.
Boo.
This month we are playing pickleball.
32 teams all fighting for the day
for the big cash prize.
Matches start in two weeks,
so you better tune in.
Oh, absolutely not.
Hold this.
(upbeat music continues)
(water splashes)
- I think Lee might be psychedelic.
- I think the words you're
looking for is psychotic.
- He's hilarious.
Anyway, it looks like the
match is starting like two weeks.
So, - What?
- Yeah.
You should probably find a partner fast.
- Well, well, well.
It isn't my favorite little degenerates.
- [All] Hey, Mr. Kenny.
- How are we doing this fine, sunny day?
- Well, max was just deciding
how she's gonna find a pickleball partner
so that she doesn't
have to sell her house.
- Wow. Okay.
What?
- Mr. Summers is charging me
$25,000 for the coffee shop.
So I'm entering in a pickleball tournament
to try and stop Sabrina
from selling the house
in order to pay him off.
- Wow.
Okay.
What?
- Oh, we could just go to the rec center.
They have a weekly pickleball
club there every Monday.
I bet you could find a partner there.
- That's actually not a bad idea, Spence.
Later. Kenny.
- Bye, Mr. Kenny.
- Just...
Sure, everything's fine.
(groovy music)
You like, but I heard
someone said it was like a,
- It's beautiful.
- Yes.
It's like a pickleball sanctuary.
- Hey, Max.
Hi.
- You work here too?
- Oh, you know how it is.
So how many?
- There's a three of us.
- I can't play Max.
If I use a rental paddle
and it hasn't been cleaned properly,
I could contract Balamuthia Encephalitis.
- Is that even a thing?
- Oh, it's so terrible.
98% mortality rate.
- Fine. Just two.
- Oh, whoo.
And this stupid elbow.
I think I got pickleball elbow
from our session earlier.
I don't know.
- Are you serious?
Fine. Just me.
- So,
so you don't have a partner then?
- Clearly.
Okay, so you're gonna be over on Court 10,
right over there.
- Are you kidding me?
I can't play with Creepy Steve.
- I know,
but he's the only one
without a partner right now.
- You suck.
- I know.
- Hey, maybe creepy Steve
can help with the competition.
- Thanks, Spence.
Hey, the kid at the counter
said that I'm your partner.
- Well, isn't today my lucky day?
- Finally.
You ready to play a what?
- I don't know.
We might be a little bit too distracted.
- If you say that again,
I'm gonna lodge this
paddle into your trachea.
- (laughing) Oh my.
You don't have to threaten
me with a good time.
- Listen for the sounds.
What sounds?
- The sounds of the paddles.
- Here. Play with that.
You're doing great.
(ball taps)
- Okay.
I should define someone who's
really, really good.
- Hello, sweet cheeks.
I know that I'm beautiful,
but we can daydream together another time.
- [Max] Besides Creepy Steve
sparking my gag reflex,
I was starting to get afraid that
this might not actually work.
- It's our serve.
Hello. It's our serve.
- [Max] Nobody here seemed
to really know how to.
Oh hell no.
That absolutely evil bitch.
Rachel Summers.
- It's our serve.
It's our serve, man.
- For someone who's
supposed to be really good,
you sure spent a lot
of time on the ground.
- Leave her alone, Rachel.
Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
- I had no idea you were so
active in the community, Maxine.
- I guess that makes up for how actively
everyone knows you're a bitch, Rachel.
- Oh no.
- You know, I really thought
after the hole you dug yourself into,
you'd have learned your place by now.
- What place would that be?
- How about soon to be convict
unless she sells the house to me?
Does that sound right?
You're not getting the house.
- Oh, I am.
And do you know what else, Maxine?
When I do,
I'll make sure my dog shits
all over whatever room is your dad's.
- Let's go.
Come on. Come on,
- Mother of God.
Yeah, keep going.
Hey, can you have your dad pick you up?
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
- You guys are so freaking cool.
My name's Lexi, by the way.
- I'm Max and this is
Charlotte and that's Spence.
- Thank you guys for saving me back there.
Rachel's, she can be such a, - Yep.
- I guess everyone kind
of has to deal with her.
- You could say that.
- Hey, why does she have
it out for you anyway?
- We actually used to be
friends, believe it or not.
But ever since she got into
pickleball, all that changed.
- Why?
- She just can't have anybody
be better at her than anything.
And I mean,
I've won a couple competitions, so.
- I know that we don't know each other
but would you wanna be my partner
for a pickleball competition
so I don't have to sell
my house to Rachel?
- I feel like I'm missing something here.
- I need to win a pickleball competition
so I can use the cash
prize to save my house.
But I need a partner in order to do it,
and I want it to be you.
- You don't even know me.
- I already know that I like you.
And plus you don't like
Rachel, which is a bonus.
- I mean, I want to.
I really do.
I mean, she's made my
life hell this past year,
but I'm kind of scared of her.
- So help me beat her
because if I win, then you win too.
- Sure. I'll do it.
- Yes.
(chair scrapping)
To beating Rachel's stupid face.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
What the hell?
What the hell, dude.
- Hold on. Hold on.
I'm so sorry.
I didn't mean to scare you.
- Okay.
Well, have a good day then.
- Well, hold on now.
I didn't walk over here for nothing.
- Oh no.
Are we about to be kidnapped?
My parents warned me about this.
- Okay.
Now, maybe we can try
doing a fresh start, okay.
My name is a Ehhh, (coughing)
- Ehhh.
- No, no, no.
It's, Ehhhde.
- So just Ed.
- No, no.
E-H-H-H-D-E.
Now, I saw what you did
over there with that pickleball
and I overheard your conversation
and I believe I can help.
- So just to confirm,
we are not being kidnapped?
- No, ma'am. No.
You need someone to teach
you how to play pickleball,
and I'm the guy to do it.
- Okay, Ehhhde. We're gonna go.
- Thank you so much for not kidnapping us.
- You're welcome.
Wait.
Now, hold on a minute.
No. Hold on.
Just wait a minute.
- Ehhhde, can you please go
find some other kids to stalk?
- Let me prove it to you.
(gentle music)
Streetlight. (ball taps)
(ball banging)
Sandwich. (ball taps)
(trash clattering)
Paper boy. (ball taps)
(ball thudding)
- Wow.
He's like a Jedi.
- Okay, Ehhhde. You can help us win.
But I'm just calling you
Ed with an E and a D.
- Deal.
(phone ringing)
- Mr. Summer's office.
Pauline speaking.
Oh, hi Mr. Summers.
Okay. I'll send her right back.
Mr. Summers will see you now.
(feet shuffling)
(kids chattering)
- Pickleball is an ugly sport,
so if you wanna win,
you can't be afraid to get dirty.
You gotta know it like
the back of your hand.
Max, what is this section of court called?
- Service box.
- Wrong.
That's the kitchen.
(ball taps)
- Hey.
- Max, show me your strong serve.
(ball taps)
- Jesus.
- Max, what makes for a good dink?
- I don't know. Vodka?
- Wrong.
(ball taps)
- You ain't playing
tennis no more Maxy, no.
Today you gonna learn
how to play a real sport.
Come on.
- I don't think this was a good idea.
- Seems that way.
- You okay down there, Spence?
- [Ed] Two.
(Ed grunting)
(Max screaming)
- The ball must land in
front of your opponent
for your drop to be effective.
Almost playing around
Gonna hand that,
pick that being around
And I just hope to see
- Hey, why didn't I get any hockey pads?
- I don't think he likes you.
- Fire.
Let's go today.
- Oh.
Ah. Geez.
Okay.
Oh. oh.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
- Your opponent's shots can't scare you
if you're not afraid of a fastball.
- So what's with the kids?
- They're here for you, princess.
Ah.
- Damn it, Ed.
- Wrong.
You're doing great guys.
- He really doesn't seem like
he should be around children.
(Ed grunting)
- Say hello to my little friends.
- Again.
(balls bouncing)
- Better.
- [Spence] Oh.
- Go ahead.
Better.
(cheerful music)
Let go of the fear, Lexi.
It's just a baseball.
- Yeah.
Just a baseball. Yeah.
Okay.
- Traveling at 55 miles an hour.
(ball smashing)
- Goddamn.
- Ooh. Hey.
Ooh.
Oh.
Oh, you are gorgeous.
Yes.
(kids chattering)
Ah.
You kids been doing real good this week.
- Ed, where'd you learn
to play pickleball?
- Vietnam.
- Vietnam?
(bomb blasting)
- Oh my god.
- Vietnam.
- Not gonna elaborate, are ya?
- Nope.
- See, I told you,
they're gonna try and win that competition
so they don't have to pay you.
- That sneaky whore.
Guess I'll just have to
do something about it.
- I don't know.
They look pretty good.
- Shut up, Amber.
Besides, I've got something
Max could never compete with.
- What's that?
- Big boobs?
- That's me, right?
- This was so good.
Wow, right?
It was really nice of Ed
to buy us all this pizza.
- I know.
Where is he, by the way?
Oh, he's in the room
with the pinball machine.
(gaming music)
- Damn it.
I'll take a hammer to your insides.
- He should really not be around children.
(groovy music)
- Hey losers.
Enjoying your pizza?
- Well, we were before you showed up.
- Ah, Maxine.
No need to be so rude.
I just wanted to wish you guys
good luck in the tournament.
- What are you talking about?
- Oh, don't play dumb, silly.
We're all friends here, right?
I just wanted to say good luck.
Oh, and introduce you to my partner,
five time US Open Pickleball
champion, Anna Kovalova.
(groovy music continues)
- Did you actually have to buy a partner
for a pickleball tournament?
That's kind of sad even for you.
- Shut up.
You know, you better start
packing, Maxine,
'cause I'm gonna make sure
you lose a whole lot more than
this stupid tournament.
Ta-ta, losers.
(guests chattering)
- Why doesn't it taste that good anymore.
- I freaking hate Pinball.
- Me too, Ed.
Me too.
(Lee screaming)
- What are doing here?
- Hey.
Sorry to just drop by like this.
I know, creepy.
But I did recently learn that my
sister, Veronica,
added your team into the competition,
which is totally awesome, by the way.
I absolutely love when
my little sister just
meddles with something that isn't hers.
Anyway,
what she failed to inform you of
was the fee for entering the tournament.
The fee?
- Yes.
Okay. Well what is it?
- $5,000.
- What?
Who has $5,000 just laying around
for a pickleball tournament?
- I get it.
Nobody likes surprises but
I'm gonna need that money
or your team is out of the competition.
- Are you serious?
- I am really, really sorry.
But if I don't have
that money by tomorrow,
your team is disqualified.
- How do you know where I live?
Not the to worry about.
(feet shuffling)
(door creaking)
- Max,
can we talk a minute?
Not today.
- Please.
Needs to be today.
- What Sabrina?
- Can we sit down or something?
- What?
- So I went to the bank today
to talk about the settlement
or alone or anything really
to get us out of this situation.
But they basically told me to piss off.
So I know you're gonna
be upset about this,
but I went to Mr. Summers
to talk about the house.
- What the hell, Sabrina?
- Max, there wasn't another option.
I'm not letting you go to jail
and I don't have money to pay the fines.
- How could you?
- I am not doing this, Max.
I'm trying to protect you.
- It's not your house to sell.
- I know you miss him,
but this is the only option.
- I am giving them a
$5,000 deposit tomorrow
and that will buy us some time
to get through the paperwork.
I'm sorry.
- No you're not.
(feet shuffling)
(groovy music)
I know I'll be
Seeing you
- I promise you,
no one will take this house away from us.
(door knocking)
- Hello?
Oh hey. It's you.
Max, right?
I need to speak with Lee.
- Okay.
Lee, get in here.
- Geez.
- He'll be right with you.
- I'm up.
(birds chirping)
- It's 7:30 in the morning.
- I have your money.
- Why didn't you say so, girl.
Here. Hold that.
Looks like we're all squared up.
I thought you didn't have the money.
- Things change.
(parent speaks in foreign language)
- You can say that again.
You know, I don't know what you're saying.
English.
(parent speaks in foreign language)
No, I have not been playing Duolingo.
(parent speaks in foreign language)
God, she can be such a pain.
- How are you guys related again?
- They adopted me a few years ago.
- But you're like 37.
- Yes. And?
- Just didn't know they could do that.
- Well, now you do.
I'll see you later.
(feet shuffling)
(birds chirping)
- So you stole your sister's money.
- She has no right to sell the house.
- I don't know how the
rules work officially,
but I think you might go to hell for that.
- It does put a little
bit of extra pressure
on you to win this tournament.
- I'll be fine. Come on.
We have to go meet Lexi.
(feet shuffling) (birds chirping)
(engine rumbling)
(feet shuffling)
(engine rumbling)
(groovy music)
(guests chattering)
(groovy music continues)
- Hey.
You know how kids love their surprises?
- We're here.
I told the I'd be able to help, so.
- I'm starting to think I don't understand
what being kidnapped is.
- Girl, you are not being kidnapped.
We just weren't allowed to let anybody
know where we were going.
The Cambria hotel owners
were very specific about that.
- We're at the Cambria Hotel?
- Oh crap.
I wasn't supposed to say anything.
Lee's gonna be so pissed.
Please pretend like you
didn't hear anything.
- Anything for you, Veronica.
- Wow. That is so nice of you.
Okay, get ready quick.
You can follow the direction of the card
and everything should
be starting pretty soon.
So, go Pickleballers.
(feet shuffling)
Now. Now.
- Yeah.
- Wow, Spence,
you were like a little Casanova.
- Really?
Oh, thank God.
- Max,
look at this.
- Pickleballers.
Oh yes.
- Guys,
let's go win this thing.
- Hell yeah.
(dramatic music)
- Somehow, I knew this is exactly
what Lee would do with pickleball.
- What's up guys?
It's your boy, Lee, here.
And welcome back to Balloon Shop.
I just checked the numbers
before we were coming out
and we're in an all time high
with 1 million of you dirty freaks
live streaming this epic
no-holds bar pickleball competition.
This might very well be the most intense
competition we've ever held.
This is gonna be badder
than last year's hand grenade tennis,
if you know what I mean?
32 teams all fighting for the cash prize
in the title of pickleball royalty.
And I'm not about wasting time.
So let's get this moving.
The first match starts
right now and I've got team.
Keep 'Em Out The Kitchen
versus the Pickleballers.
(group cheering)
So if you ate one of those teams,
then you have gots to go.
Only competitors are allowed
inside until the final match.
Let's go.
Boo yeah.
(upbeat music)
(feet shuffling)
- Hi. It's so nice to meet you.
- Shut your pile hole, loser.
- Wow. Okay.
Was not expecting that.
- Who's playing for serve?
- I can.
- All right, captains, step forward.
- So is this like a
coin toss kind of thing?
- What are you talking about?
It's always rock, paper, scissors.
- Right?
And then we'll play hopscotch
after, right?
You are being serious.
- Hands up.
On the count of shoot.
One, two, three, shoot.
Pickleballers.
- Maybe next time, champ.
(upbeat music)
- Excuse me.
Excuse me, what?
- What are you doing?
Mom said I could come.
- Ah.
I didn't sign off on this.
- Mom said I could come.
Stop embarrassing me.
- I don't...
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- Oh.
- Whoa.
Are you kidding me?
(ball taps)
- Oh. (ball taps)
- I am fairly certain
this woman is not human.
- But she is human.
- Shut up.
Shut it, shut it, shut it.
(ball taps)
- Oh.
(ball taps)
(whistle blowing)
- Pickleballers win.
- Pickleballers take the W.
One match down.
15 more to go. (laughing)
- Sit down.
- Love it.
- Of course, of course.
Okay, big guy. Talk soon.
Apologize for the wait.
But you know how it is.
- Of course.
- So why don't we just
shoot the canary in the coal mine here.
I'm assuming you're here with my money.
- Yeah.
I've got it right here.
- Let's not make it a game show, princess.
You know, Beanie,
you've really filled out
over the last few years.
(envelope rustling)
Am I some kind of clown to you, Ms.
Dangerfield?
- Excuse me.
- Am I supposed to ride around my office
on a little tricycle?
Do I have a big red nose?
Do you go "Squeak, squeak," huh?
- I don't understand.
- Take your stupid cartoon
money and get outta my office.
- Goddamn it. Max.
- Miss Sabrina, you got two days.
(upbeat music) (ball taps)
- Oh, dear.
These girls may be calling
themselves Pink Dream,
but they are an absolute nightmare
if you're up against them.
Rachel Summers acting as team captain
but Anna Kovalova seems
like the type of girl
you might go to therapy over.
(ball taps) (upbeat music continues)
- Damn. They're good.
- Of course.
It's easy to be good when you can buy
a professional athlete as your partner.
- Go. (feet shuffling)
- Best of luck, bitches.
- I hope you choke, Rachel.
(ball taps) (upbeat music continues)
(upbeat music continues)
- I think someone may need
to find Rachel's father.
- I wonder when we're gonna find yours.
(feet shuffling)
- Well, come on now, Max.
I taught you better than that.
- Ed.
How'd you know we were here?
- Oh, well, when you two didn't show up
for the final lesson,
I assumed you're either abducted
by the Chinese government
or enrolled into an internet
pickleball tournament.
- Those are obviously the
two most likely options.
- I'm so excited you're here, Ed.
- Thank you, strange girl.
(feet shuffling)
I was just stopping by to wish y'all luck
in this overwhelmingly
questionable tournament.
- Thank you, Ed.
We really appreciate it.
I mean, it'll be nice have,
it'll be nice having
you here to root us on.
- No, I'm sorry.
I can't stay here to do that.
- Isn't that what you
just said you're doing?
- No, no.
I said that I was just stopping by
to give you my support before moving on.
- Moving on to where?
- Well, wherever the wind takes
me, you know.
I'm faded to wander the earth
in search of those helpless souls
in need of pickleball guidance
in order to save their homes
from financial turmoil.
- [Spence] Does that happen often, Ed?
- Oh, come on.
I'll see you on the other side.
- What the hell?
- The other side of what?
(feet shuffling)
- What's this?
(phone taps)
(dialer ringing)
- What the hell are you doing, Max?
(phone buzzing)
- Ooh.
Although these girls have
put on quite the show,
something's telling me
they're about to get
drop ticked out of here. (laughing)
Let's put a pole up on the feed, Tommy.
Who thinks this is it?
- Who's Tommy?
(ball taps)
- You saw him at
Thanksgiving the other night.
- No I didn't.
I thought you brought
your girlfriend over.
(upbeat music continues) (ball taps)
- Game on.
It seems like the Hulk
might not be able to get it up after all.
Womp, womp.
- Time.
(whistle blowing)
- Time.
(Lee coughing)
Pickleballers are using a time out?
- You need to let this shit go.
- Shut up.
- You shut up.
You always let your emotions take over
instead of just stop and
thinking for a second.
They're taking advantage of you.
Stop being angry and focus on the shot.
I really want to beat Rachel,
but I can't do that unless
you learn to control this.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- Well,
it seems like Lady Hulk
has found her Viagra.
- Ah, that wasn't funny
the first time you said it.
- Shut up.
- All right.
Now we're just being a show off.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
(dramatic music)
(whistle blowing)
- [Referee] Pickleballers win.
(both screaming)
- I love you guys.
- I love you too, random guys.
(group cheering)
- Oh yeah.
Max Dangerfield and Lexi Adler is like,
I got Batman and Superman
over here with pickleball paddles.
(laughing)
How the hell did you two take that win?
- It was honestly, all thanks to Lexi.
- Oh, so modest.
Lexi, tell everyone
streaming about that timeout,
which by the way does not
exist in the rules here anymore.
What were you thinking?
Invigorating.
Now let's talk about that dragon ball.
- Who the hell does she think she is?
- They honestly played really well.
- You know, I don't remember
asking for your opinion.
I'm paying you to play not talk.
(door creaking)
You know, someone needs to remind
little miss hotshot of her place
and I think I've got just the idea.
- Did you even look inside the box?
- No. Why would we?
- It's from Ed. Look inside.
(cheerful music)
- Well, this is it.
We are going to take a break.
But remember 10 o'clock sharp,
the big game, the final match,
the whole enchafreakinlada
will be live again.
Don't be that dweeb on Reddit later
trying to find a link
'cause it won't exist.
10 o'clock. Be there.
- This is insane.
We might actually be able to do this.
- I feel like we should cheers
with champagne instead of water.
- Don't worry, Charlotte.
I spiked yours.
- What were you thinking?
I could become an alcoholic.
Alcoholism leads to like
140,000 deaths per year, Spencer.
- Don't worry, Charlotte.
I'm sure you'll beat those odds.
(hands clapping)
- [Dylan] Congratulations
on the big win Max.
- Leave us alone, Dylan.
- Calm down, tough guy.
You're not the one that gets angry.
It's little Miss Maxy over here, isn't it?
- Just ignore him.
- What do you want Dillard?
- Nothing.
Like I said,
just wanted to congratulate you both
on your big win.
- Well, your message has been received.
So now buzz off.
- Oh, easy on the hostility.
Look, I'm not the one out of the two of us
with a criminal record.
- [Lexi] Max.
- I guess it makes sense
that it runs in the family.
- Are you sure you wanna go
there, Dillard?
- He's doing this on purpose.
It's just like the match.
He wants you to take the bait. Don't.
Please just ignore him, Max.
- Nah.
You can't ignore me, Max.
Let's face it,
you love to get angry.
There it is.
It's not your fault though.
No.
You see, most drug
dealers are also abusers.
Runs in your family.
You poor, poor thing.
(items smashing)
- [Max] Lexi was right.
She was absolutely right.
I should have ignored him,
but I sure as hell didn't.
And as anyone would've expected,
I fell right into their stupid plan.
- She was like a wild animal.
Honestly, I'm scared to
still be this close to her.
- Sorry, you got arrested, Max.
- It's okay, Charlotte.
- How are you doing?
- I'm fine, I guess. How is Lexi?
- She's fine, I guess.
She's still pretty upset with you.
(feet shuffling)
- Just a minute.
Just a second, okay.
Just a second. Jesus.
- You got 30 seconds.
- Lexi. I'm sorry, okay.
- You are not, Max,
because you don't know when to quit.
And it doesn't matter who
you drag down with you,
whether it's me or your
friends or your sister.
This game wasn't about you winning Max.
It was just as important to me.
But you don't care.
So.
- Lexi.
- Stay safe, Max.
- [Max] I'm gonna be honest.
I felt like an absolute
peace of in this moment.
I let everyone down.
- I'm so peeved right now.
I could literally kill
Rachel and Dylan so hard.
- We need to break her out of jail.
- We need to,
what?
- We need to break her outta jail
and bring her back here so
that she can win that game.
- Break her out of jail?
- I'm not speaking Spanish, Spence.
Come on.
(door knocking)
- I get it. You're at the door.
What?
Sure. Come on in guys.
Hey, where did you get that van?
- Miss Sabrina, we need your help.
Charlotte,
it's just really not a good time.
- But Max is in trouble.
- What are you talking about?
- She's a minor, Frank.
What the hell are you thinking?
- Relax.
No, this comes from Mr. Summers.
She sits in the cell.
How the hell does Mr. Summers
get that kind of say?
- You got an issue, take it up with him.
- I dunno what the hell's going on, Max,
but I'm getting you outta here.
- So what you're saying is
Max learned to play pickleball
so she could win a tournament
and now she got herself arrested
for assaulting the same boy
who put her in this
situation to begin with.
- Yes.
- And now you would like
me to help break her out,
which is an even larger offense,
so she can win the tournament.
- I'm so glad you followed.
I thought this was gonna
be a lot harder to explain.
- Do you two hear yourselves?
Charlotte, you are afraid
of literally everything.
How do you plan to break
into a police station?
- I can't lose Max.
I need her.
Nothing is more scary than that.
- Max made her choice multiple times.
Look where that got her.
- To be honest, Miss Sabrina,
you didn't really give her a choice.
What are you talking about?
This house is all she has left of your dad
and you were gonna sell it.
You didn't really try very
hard to see it from her side.
And I know you need to
be an adult right now,
but you're still her sister
and that's who she needs you to be
because she stood up to a bully,
the same bully who's been
mean to Spencer and I for forever,
but we can't stand up for
ourselves like she can.
She just wants to win so
that she can save this.
And I think she can,
if we give her a chance.
(phone buzzing)
- Hey.
Can I call you later?
- [Kenny] What?
No, no.
Don't hang up.
They've got Max locked up
here like a freaking criminal,
you know, all because of Mr. Summers
and his stupid donations.
I don't even care about this
job, honestly.
I'm getting her out.
Let us help you.
- What?
- Just come by the house.
So, what's the plan?
- [Charlotte] Okay.
Max is probably sitting at her jail cell,
alone and scared and thinking
she's never gonna see
any of us ever again.
So here's how we're gonna break her
out of a high security
prison and bring he home.
- Just gonna butt in here real
quick, Charlotte.
You do know Max isn't in a prison, right?
She's just being held at a police station.
- What's the difference?
- Well, one's a prison
and one's a police station.
- So she's not locked up.
- She is, but just in an overnight cell.
- Like the ones they have in prison?
Yes.
- But she's not in prison?
- Yes.
- So you could just let her out?
Yes and no.
- So is it yes or is it no?
It's not that simple, Charlotte.
Kenny can let her out,
but nobody can see him do it.
- So we need a distraction.
Someone who's loud and incessant.
Someone who's unafraid to be stupid.
Please help me.
Someone's trying to kidnap me.
I can't run any longer.
- Who's trying to kidnap you?
- Please. You need to help.
Get off the counter, please.
- You need to. She's outside.
(Spence screaming)
Okay.
- Come on.
- Leave me alone, devil woman.
Please. I don't wanna be your sex slave.
Devil. You bitch.
- [Charlotte] While we make
a large commotion in the front,
that should let Officer
Kenny sneak in and get Max.
- Come on.
You too, sir. Come on.
All right. Thank you.
You too.
Have a good night.
- Hey, I am the victim here.
I am the victim.
(dramatic music)
- [Miss Sabrina] What If there's more than
two people at the station,
- [Kenny] If there is,
the only person it would be is Gary.
And Gary has a very easy solution.
(groovy music)
- Excuse me. Sir, I need some help.
- Oh my God.
How may I help you, ma'am?
- I'm trying to locate my kids
and I could really use a man's help.
- Kids, huh?
- This cannot be the only option.
- [Kenny] It's the only option.
- Now don't you worry, honey.
I'll hope you find your kids.
- Thank God.
Yeah, there's two of them.
- Two?
Two.
- Two.
A boy and a girl.
I love them.
They're, you know my life.
- Hey, we...
Someone's trying to kidnap me.
- Hi, mom.
There you're, oh look. Thank you.
This strong man just helped us find you.
Let's go.
I've been looking for you everywhere.
Let's go to the car, okay.
Okay.
- All right.
Yeah, mom.
- Bye. Thank you.
Okay, the van's outside.
Go, go, go.
Let's go to the car.
Go, go, go, go, go, go.
- Did it work?
- You guys are freaking amazing.
- Time to go, kid.
- You got a tournament to win.
(engine cranking) (engine rumbling)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
Now this is what we call
Now this is what we call
Now this is what we call
- Woo.
Now this is what we call
- Oh my God. Woo.
This is it people, the big moment,
the moment of truth,
the moment of destiny.
The moment of pickleball.
30 teams have been eliminated.
This is the moment of pickleball.
Place your bets.
(dramatic music)
Woo.
I need both captains to meet
me for a pregame chitchat.
Where the hell is your partner?
- She's not gonna make it.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What are you mean,
she's not gonna make it.
- Oh my gosh.
You didn't hear?
Max got arrested after that last match?
Something about doing drugs
in the lobby, I think.
- Shut up, Rachel.
- You know that's not what happened.
- I can't stream a freaking
forfeit as my final match.
- Why don't you tell that to her?
She's the one that got
my partner arrested.
- I would never do something like that.
But if they can't play,
I guess you're right,
we would win by a forfeit.
- Huh?
- Don't you have anyone
else that can play with you?
- Yeah, Lee,
let me just pull partner outta my ass.
No, I didn't come with any backup players.
- Shit.
Shit.
- I'm gonna lose so many
followers because of this.
Go.
Okay.
(upbeat music)
All right. (coughing)
All right.
So.
I know we were all amped for the big,
(technical beep)
I hope you got those bets in early
'cause we have a new champion to reveal.
(door banging) (cheerful music)
- Who the hell is that chick?
(cheerful music continues)
- 9:59. We did it.
- It's all thanks to you, Charlotte.
- You know I couldn't lose you, Max.
Now go kick her butt.
You're the best.
- Oh, thank God.
Yes.
- Wait, wait, wait.
No guys.
- Yeah.
Hi, guys.
- Only competitors are
allowed inside though.
- Put your hand down.
Veronica, no.
- Listen.
- What are you doing?
- Mom said, "You have to
be nice to guests," okay.
And that's what I'm doing.
What is happening?
- Guys, come on. Don't be shy.
Come on. Come on.
- No.
- I love your outfit. It's so cute.
Come on.
- Thank you.
- Go ahead and sit down right here.
You can actually sit down next to me.
Oh, who cares about that?
Veronica.
- You can sit next to me.
Scoot over.
- Hey guys, it's Veronica Chin.
Now with my new best friends.
- I'm gonna take a break.
- Go ahead and introduce
yourself, you guys.
- Hi there.
Do you need a chair?
I'll get you a chair. Hold on.
- [Rachel] You just don't
know when to quit, do you?
- You lying to get me arrested
doesn't really motivate me
to not wanna kick your ass.
- Whatever.
When I beat you here,
at least you'll know what
your jail cell feels like.
- Do I even wanna know how you got here?
- Probably not.
- I'm really sorry for what I said.
It was way over the top.
- No, I wanted to apologize to you.
I should have listened
to you the whole time.
It's just,
it's always been easier to just let,
let it take over and I'm sorry, okay.
- You help me beat her, we call it even.
- Deal.
(whistle blows)
- Captains, step forward.
Lets rob a bank
Six, sept, huit
- [Referee] All right, ladies.
You know what to do.
Are we ready?
- Yes.
- Just do it.
- On the count of shoot.
One, two, three, shoot.
Again.
One, two, three, shoot.
Again.
One, two, three, shoot.
Pickleballers.
- Enjoy your little victory, Maxine.
It'll be short-lived.
(heavy rock music)
- Dude.
Yes. I freaking love the Pickleballers.
(upbeat music)
(ball taps)
I've been wondering why
it's happened to you now
Am I the only one who's
struggling to move on
Yeah
Guess, I felt that
this was meant to last
Now I wish I was still
living in the past
- Ooh. Yes.
Yeah
- [Referee] Pink Dreams, point.
(ball taps)
Never felt so damn frustrated
(whistle blowing)
Pink Dreams, point.
You're just wasting my time
All the feelings that I dread
And it's ringing in my head
Can't believe the words you said
Now they're ringing in my head
- Let's see what you really got, Rachel.
Somebody save me
Now we're hanging by a thread
And it's ringing in my head
(whistle blowing)
- Point.
- Are you joking?
That wasn't even close to being in.
You can't be serious.
Is there someone else
here that can do your job?
All your friends are now my enemies
- Let's give you another one of those.
Now we're hanging by a thread
It keeps on ringing in my head
(ball taps)
(group cheering)
- They did it.
Pickleball is the best sport ever.
(heavy rock music) (ball taps)
(Rachel grunting)
(group cheering)
- I don't need your help.
Maybe try carrying your weight instead.
- Babe, what are you doing?
Are you really gonna let them win?
- Do something about her.
(heavy rock music continues)
(heavy rock music continues)
(ball taps)
(balls clattering)
(dramatic music)
- Oh.
- [Lexi] Max.
- I'm fine.
It's just my ankle.
- Oh.
That was really bad.
- [Referee] Hey, are you okay to play?
- Yeah. Fine.
Just need a second.
- Max, you can't play.
I have to Sabrina.
(both laughing)
- Rachel needs to trip into a sewage drain
filled with hungry, giant alligators.
- Charlotte.
- Rachel's losing. What do we expect?
- Okay.
What are we doing here, ladies?
- This game needs to be rescheduled.
Who are you?
- Her sister.
- Well, although you are
strikingly beautiful,
absolutely freaking not.
This match is starting up right now.
Play, forfeit, but whatever you are doing,
we are doing it now.
All right. All right.
The Pickleballers have got the lead,
but they've had a bit of a stumble.
So Max, what's the call?
Are you in or are you out?
- I'm in.
- Huh?
That's the chick I arrested.
- I'm so relieved to hear you're okay.
At least now I won't have to
feel bad about beating you.
- Hey, are you sure you can do this?
- Might as well go out swinging, right.
(upbeat music)
- Score is four, serving five.
Pink Dreams to serve.
- This will be too easy.
(upbeat music continues)
What's wrong? Lose your footing, Max.
Oh, relax.
It's just pickleball.
- One, two, three.
There we go.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- Come on, compadres.
You can do it.
(ball taps)
- Let's go. All right.
I see that.
- Max,
it's not your fault.
Hey, you can do this.
But you know where to play.
Just have to wait for the right moment.
Besides if I know Rachel,
she's gonna screw it
up eventually anyways.
Right?
- Okay.
- [Lexi] Let's do this.
(cheerful upbeat music)
- Please be the one.
Please, please, please.
(ball taps)
(group cheering)
(cheerful upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- In case you haven't noticed
the cripple's the easy target.
Hit it to the girl that can't move
so that I can win and we can go home.
It's why you were hired.
It's not that complicated.
- Back up.
- Hey.
Get outta your head.
- I'm sorry.
After everything we've done,
I'm still gonna let you down.
- Max, you broke outta prison to be here.
It doesn't matter if we win or lose.
I always got your back, pickleball or not?
- Screw this.
(ball taps)
(whistle blowing)
Pickleballer's point.
(group cheering)
- Yes. We're back.
We're back.
- What the hell was that?
- I'm sorry, it slipped.
- You can do this.
(upbeat music)
(ball taps)
- Are you kidding me?
- Tons of back spin. Sorry.
(ball taps)
(Rachel screaming)
- You incompetent little slut.
You're fired.
And you know what? You can
absolutely forget getting paid.
I'll finish the stupid game myself.
(whistle blowing)
- Ma'am, you can't play
without another player.
- You need to blow your
stupid little whistle
and start this game again.
- Oh, no, no, no.
You are not gonna play this.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Jesus, if she wants to play
alone, let her play alone, okay.
At this point, it will get us more views.
(upbeat music continues)
- Hey Max, beat her ass.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
(Rachel thuds)
(whistle blows)
- Pickleballers win.
(group cheering)
- That was insane.
Pickleballers, hands down,
the best sport on the planet.
I feel like I might explode. (laughing)
Congratulations to the Pickleballers.
Here is your big prize.
(group cheering)
All right.
- Veronica, can you sign us off?
- Really?
- All right, folks.
That's it.
That's all she wrote.
Pickleballers are Balloon
Shop's new winners.
(group cheering) (upbeat music continues)
Have a good night. (indistinct)
(upbeat music continues)
- We did it.
- I'm so proud of you.
Dad would be so proud of you.
- I'm so happy and
would love to celebrate.
But the music's really loud in here,
so could we maybe
celebrate somewhere else?
Oh my God.
You did it. You did it.
I'm so excited for you two,
- So, Charlotte tells me
that you single handedly
broke Max out of the police station.
Is that true?
- Ah, no.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's true.
- Oh my God.
You're like the coolest guy ever. Come on.
Come on.
- Okay.
- Can we go bowling tomorrow?
- I thought you were afraid
of pin setter machines.
- They don't seem so bad anymore.
I need to pee.
- Pickleball is the greatest sport ever.
- [Ed] You can say that again, kiddo.
- Ed?
I thought we'd never see you again.
- No.
I said I'd see on the other side.
I think he has a warrant.
- True.
I'll call it in.
No, I should really,
I need to call that in, actually.
- [Max] So the day was saved.
I had no idea what I was getting into
with what I thought was a
simple pickleball tournament.
But I guess with
pickleball, you never can.
And If you want somebody to love
Remember that you will
receive as much as you give
When the world is letting you down
You know that I will
always be by your side
And if you want somebody to love
Remember that you will
receive as much as you give
When the world is letting you down
You know that I will
always be by your side
(birds chirping)
- I don't care if you got the money.
Not no more.
I'm taking this house.
It's collateral for what
you did to my daughter,
my kind, innocent daughter.
- Sounds to me like you're
making a bad decision there, friend.
- Sweet Sasquatch. Who the hell are you?
- Oh, just a guy, you know.
Guy that people hire to
make their problems go away.
- Yeah.
Well I got to,
(bones snapping)
- Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Let me tell you, let me ask you something.
Do you like the idea of
shitting out your own insides?
- No.
No.
- I don't.
Oh, don't like that idea.
- Oh good.
Then what I would suggest to you
is to leave these nice
people alone forever.
Yeah. Okay.
- Oh.
Good.
- [Mr. Summers] Someone call 911.
Someone call 911.
- Pleasure doing business.
- Spence.
- Yeah.
- Did you hire a hitman?
- Yeah.
- He's looking for experience?
- He seems nice.
(upbeat music)
Is this some kind of
miracle we didn't see
Even if we're apart we're
getting burned by this
First degree
Getting close but I'm still
stuck in the underground
I can't help but falling into
Settle in
Settle down
I can tell by the look in your eyes
You're not ready to go
I am lost with my head in the clouds
So I don't really know
Standing by the edge not looking down
'Cause I want you to know
Waiting for the interstellar light
I don't need a reason to show
I know it's all about you and I
And the things we know
We will keep on falling down
But I won't let go
Is this some kind of
miracle we didn't see
Even if we're apart we're
getting burned by this
First Degree
Getting close but I'm still
stuck in the underground
I can't help but falling into
Settle in
- [Max] Hey Rachel.
- What?
- We only get one of
these so we'll use it now.
- [All] Fuck you, Rachel.
- Whatever.
This movie sucks anyway.
- Cut.
(group laughing)
(dramatic music)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
(cheerful music)
(birds chirping)
(dog barking)
The sun is shining on me
Not a cloud in the sky
Not a reason to worry
'Cause the sun is shining on me
There's this big blue, beautiful sky
It's got me singing
Nothing here is ever
gonna bring me down
I said nothing here is
ever gonna bring me down
It's just the sun sunshiny day
A sun sunshiny day
A sun sunshiny
(upbeat music)
- Hey, there.
Figured I'd stop
everything here and say hi.
My name is Max.
And yes, that poor innocent
paperboy is perfectly fine.
(feet shuffling)
Eh, I'm sure he'll be fine?
Anyway, all you need to know
is this guy's name is Dylan
and Dylan is an asshole.
(trash clattering)
(feet shuffling) (birds chirping)
Oh, are you serious.
You got me Dillard.
- It's Dylan.
(birds chirping)
- Thank you.
So again, guys, we just,
wait.
And I'm greeted by
your cute little smile
The world is new with you by my side
Everything is beautiful
Tuesday afternoon,
I'm calling you home
Just to hear your voice on the phone
- Say you're sorry, Max.
I think of you and I'm not alone
You are everything
Under the sky so blue
- Tell him how sorry you are, Max.
I found a piece of heaven
- I'm sorry. Spending my days with you
You are my piece of heaven
- If anybody else had
responded to this call,
you'd be in the back
of a cruiser right now.
Waking up with you in my arms
I've got it all and nothing's a miss
- It's on the house.
Everything is beautiful
Sunday morning snooze
With breakfast in bed - Okay.
And I listen to the song in my head
It sings of you
And the things that you do - Just
'Cause you are everything
- What are you doing?
- I was just getting coffee.
- Seriously, Max.
He was gonna press charges.
- Over what?
Me spilling some cold brew on him.
- You know they have
security cameras here, right?
(upbeat music)
- Like I said,
I just spilt some cold brew.
- Why are you being like this?
- Fine.
I found it at school.
He was the one telling people that dad
was selling drugs that night.
So I told him nicely to stop lying.
- And?
- Andy asked if dad had
any drugs buried with him
so he could get a free hit.
- Wow.
Okay.
Just,
I get it now.
How did you even lift that thing?
Those cakes weigh like 50 pounds.
- Probably because of all the
cocaine I did on the way here.
- Oh yeah. Great.
That's a relief.
I thought it was something alarming.
Like you started a school sport
or going to the gym just,
- Nope.
- Well, I can't take you home.
Your sister doesn't get home
for another hour and a half.
Wanna help me improve
my shooting accuracy?
Can I shoot too?
- Sure.
- Yes.
(groovy music) (bowling pins clattering)
- What?
- You know what.
- Do you really think I was
gonna give you a loaded gun
after finding out you just dumped
two gallons of cold brew
on top of a teenager?
- Obviously.
I'm worried about you.
- Mm.
- How's it looking down there?
- Bingo. Okay.
Here you go, Max, Officer Kenny.
Hi.
You guys are gonna be over at Lane 10.
- Thank you, random citizen.
- Anytime man.
Hey Max, you wanna know why
I put you over at Lane 10?
- Why?
- Because, - Why?
- Because you're the only 10 I see.
- Thank you,
strange, awkward bowling attendant guy.
- Oh.
Okay.
- You guys make a cute couple.
- Stop.
(feet shuffling)
(groovy music continues)
- Hey, dude.
You didn't tell us you were coming.
- Relax. It wasn't planned.
We were just stopping here
before he brought me to prison.
- Are you giving a presentation?
What?
- Charlotte,
are you playing this time or not?
- No, Mr. Kenny.
There's been at least 15 deaths
by pin setter machine since 1984.
- Okay.
- Hey, Spence.
Isn't that that girl you
pretend you don't like,
but we all know you actually like her?
I was tempted
Tempted by your smile
I was
- No, I just talk to her sometimes
'cause she's the only girl at school
that watches balloon shop.
- And because you're in love with her.
- That is not true.
(Kenny grunting)
- Huh?
- Why is my name spelled Mex?
(Spence laughing)
- [Kenny] Are you kidding?
Damn it.
Where's that bowling kid?
- What?
Every step we take is tic tac toe
Tic tac toe
- I freaking hate Rachel Summers.
- I freaking hate Rachel Summers too.
- My parents said Rachel Summers
is going to hell when she dies.
(gentle music)
- Hey.
So I'm gonna have to have you
guys move over the lane 15.
- No way.
That's the lane next to Creepy Steve.
- Who's Creepy Steve?
- The guy on Lane 16 named
Steve, who is creepy?
- I have to give the lane to Mr. Summers.
I'm sorry.
- Why can't you move him over to Lane 15?
Because his daughter doesn't wanna bowl
right next to Creepy Steve.
Are you kidding me?
- Max, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, okay.
It's just,
I've had three birthday
parties this morning
and the urinal is so filled with poop.
I've covered it up with a garbage bag
and I don't know when I'm
going to take care of that.
So please,
please just move the lane 15, please.
- You suck.
- I know.
(feet shuffling)
(bag thuds)
- Thank you so much for
letting us have your lane, Maxine.
- Yeah. It was so generous of you.
- Oh, anytime.
It's the least I can do
after having such a nice conversation
with your boyfriend this afternoon.
(bag thuds)
(group laughing)
- I am not gonna lie,
this is probably the
closest I've ever come
to adding one more death
statistic via pin setter.
(engine rumbling)
(doors banging)
(feet crunching)
(door banging)
- What happened to you?
Hi, Miss Sabrina.
Hey Sabrina.
- Miss Sabrina,
can you please not tell my parents
that a police officer drove me home?
- I am so confused.
Kenny, what's going on?
- That is a bit of an interesting story.
- Do tell.
I've gotta stay like this
'Cause if I don't, then it'll show
- [Miss Sabrina] Can I come in?
- I'll be down in a couple of minutes.
- Hey.
- Kenny told me what happened?
- [Max] Can you please save
the lecture for tomorrow?
- I am not here to yell at you.
Here to make sure you're okay.
- I'm fine.
I just,
I don't like when people talk about him,
especially like that.
- Yeah, I get it.
Let's try to work on some boundaries, huh?
Maybe cap out anything
larger than a coffee pot.
- The two gallons felt so good though.
- I don't doubt it,
but it's not actually
gonna make you feel better.
Try to remember that for
next time if you can.
(feet shuffling)
Anyway, if you're in
need of a healthy outlet,
we're all set up downstairs
for what usually works.
(door banging) (feet clomping)
(Spence breathing heavily)
(feet clomping) (dramatic music)
- All right.
She's gonna be angry, aggressive,
unstable, and unpredictable.
But we signed up for this
and we'll probably recover emotionally
in at least a couple years.
- Let's try not to die.
(dramatic music continues)
(feet shuffling)
- I know.
They're crazy.
(dramatic groovy music)
(dramatic groovy music continues)
(item beeping) (Spence screaming)
- Die demon. (Spence panting)
This girl is going to
give me a heart attack.
(dramatic groovy music continues)
(corn popping)
(Spence screaming)
No.
No.
Oh God, me?
Okay.
Maybe she didn't get me.
- I'm pretty cool.
Spence, you ain't got got again.
You missed.
That's what you did.
You missed.
(thunder crackling)
(Spence screaming)
- Everything's fine.
Spencer's just probably pretending
to be Rambo like last time.
(ball bouncing)
(thunder crackling)
(feet shuffling)
- Finally.
Got you.
(feet shuffling)
(doorbell dings)
(toy gun firing)
Are you kidding me?
(feet shuffling)
(door creaking)
Can I help you?
- Hello.
My name is Leon Mueller from Mueller Law.
Are your parents home?
- Nope.
- Is there an adult here
that I can speak with?
- Yes.
That'll be me.
- Is there maybe a more
grownup adult here?
- No.
I am 25 and an adult.
- So are your parents like
gonna be home soon or,
- Well, our father died a year ago
and my mom hasn't been home in 15.
So no, just me.
- Right.
So you are the legal caregiver
for Maxine Dangerfield?
- Yes.
That's me, the adult.
- Okay then.
Mr. Summers is filing suit against Maxine
unless all damages accrued to his shop
and his staff are paid for in full.
The total damages acquired this afternoon
are total to $25,000.
This breakdown right here
is itemized in this envelope
so that you can go ahead
and take a look at that.
You have 30 days to pay
for everything in full
or else this will progress
into a criminal case against Maxine.
- But we don't have $25,000.
- Then I suggest you get a good lawyer.
(door banging)
(engine rumbling)
- Max.
- Of course, he went and cried
to his stupid girlfriend.
- This is insane.
They're charging you for
psychological damage.
- You could probably just
go to church for that one.
- And this, why would they
charge you for a machine
if it's a, you know,
if it's a piece of shit?
- It stands for point of sale, Spence.
- Oh.
- Max, I'm gonna need you to go
to Mr. Summer's office
tomorrow and try to resolve this.
- No way.
I'm not gonna go and
beg to someone like him.
- Well, it doesn't matter if you want to,
we don't have this kind of money.
- Are you seriously expecting me
to go and grovel to that asshole?
I can't believe I'm about to
go and grovel to that asshole.
Excuse me.
Hello.
- Are your parents here?
- I need to speak with Mr. Summers.
Do you have an appointment?
- No.
- Unfortunately Mr. Summers
only has time for scheduled appointments.
- Do you mind at least asking
if he could meet with me?
- Name please.
- Max Dangerfield.
- Hello, Mr. Summers,
I have a Max Dangerfield
here wanting to speak with you.
He said you can head back.
- Thanks.
- Of course. Of course, Anthony.
What's the point in having five yachts
if you don't got your own
private island to dock 'em on.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah. All right.
Okay. Big guy.
Talk soon.
Miss Dangerfield, what can I do for you?
- I was just looking
to see if we could talk
about the paperwork you
dropped off yesterday.
- Yeah. Yeah.
The coffee shop. Right, right.
You know, I had Leon go
over that 16 different ways
just to make sure, you know,
we dotted our t's crossed our I's,
and sounds to me like you're
saying we miscalculated.
- No was just seeing if maybe there was
another way that we could solve this.
- I hate to be the bearer
of bad biscuits here, Maxy,
but we got a saying,
if you don't got the dime,
you don't commit the crime.
You know what I'm saying?
- I don't really. No.
- Okay.
Let me put it to you this way, kiddo.
I don't wanna do this.
I don't wanna be Mr. Bad Guy.
Nobody likes when Mr. Bad Guy shows up.
But Max, you broke a lot
of my stuff yesterday.
You upset a few people.
You know what I'm saying?
(feet shuffling)
Listen, if you need a little
help coming up with the money,
we can talk about selling
that house of yours.
You know, Maxy,
I wish I could help you out,
I really do,
but you know, my hands, they're tight.
There she is.
My little gum drop.
Come over here. Gimme a kiss.
(door creaking and banging)
(gentle music)
(feet shuffling)
- Then he suggested we sell
the fricking house to break even
as if that would ever happen.
- It's a shame your dad didn't divorce
your mom before he died,
then you guys would've had
all that settlement money.
- Thanks, Charlotte.
- I'm just saying it would've helped.
- Okay.
- I know it's a little bit extreme, okay,
but what if we just
like hire a hit man to kill Mr. Summers?
- Interesting approach.
I like the idea, but I do
think that if we are struggling
to come up with the money
to pay off Mr. Summers,
that hiring a hitman to kill him
would be substantially more expensive.
- But if Mr. Summers is dead,
- We still have to pay the hitman, Spence.
And maybe our only option.
- Hiring a hitman?
- No.
Selling the house...
- Are you serious?
- I don't see how else we're gonna come up
with that kind of money.
- How could you even consider that?
- Max, did you read all of the paperwork?
Like, did you see the
charges if we don't pay them?
You turn 18 this year,
you could actually go to jail.
You do understand that, right?
- I am not letting them take this house.
- You don't get to make that statement
when you're the reason we're in this mess.
(somber music) (feet shuffling)
(door banging)
- How the hell could she say that?
She doesn't care at all.
It doesn't matter.
She'll figure something out.
I'm not letting that
scumbag take our house.
- What's a scumbag?
- Forget it.
You wouldn't understand?
(kids chattering)
- Max,
Max, just stop for a second, please.
Jesus.
(Spence panting)
I can't breathe.
- What?
- I thought something you could do.
- Oh yeah. Is it to buy a yacht
and then sell that for the damage money?
- No.
Balloon Shop.
Max. Wait, I'm serious.
- What?
How is your internet show
gonna get me $25,000?
This month's competition
has a huge cash price.
- Oh yeah.
How big?
- $25,000.
- Are you serious?
- Yes. Why do you think I
ran all the way over here.
- It was only across the street, Spence.
- Wait.
What is the competition?
- I don't know.
It's something called Pickleball.
- The hell is pickleball.
- I don't know.
That's some kind of sport or something.
- What sport could they
possibly play with pickles?
- I don't know Charlotte.
But Max needs $25,000 and
they have a $25,000 grand prize.
- I'm not gonna play pickleball, Spence.
- Okay.
What other ideas do you have?
- None.
- So why not pickles then?
- Fine.
Yes.
- How do I get in?
- That,
that's the trickier part.
So, as you know,
Balloon Shop's gotten a little crazy,
but apparently Veronica knows
the guy who runs the show.
- So can you talk to her?
- Yeah, Veronica.
Yeah, of course, I can talk to her.
Yeah. Duh.
Obviously, stupid.
I can talk to Veronica. Duh.
- Why'd your mouth stop working?
(upbeat music)
(door knocking)
- Well, guess they're not home.
Maybe we could just
come back another time.
- What do you want?
- Hi.
- Is Veronica home?
- [Parent] Veronica,
(speaks in foreign language)
- Mama, I got it.
(latch clicking)
- Oh, hi.
How can I help you guys?
Wait, you were the kids from
the bowling alley, right?
Don't you go to Winter Garden High?
- We do.
I sit behind you in physics and pre-Cal.
And last Tuesday you
borrowed my Starfish pencil.
- Yeah, I think I still have that pencil.
- I know.
I was too intimidated to ask for it back,
so I decided never to
speak of it ever again.
- Oh.
Well, I'm sorry.
- Spence, the show.
- I gotta go.
(feet shuffling)
- See, I told you he could run fine.
- What's going on?
- I know that we don't know each other,
but Spence mentioned that
you both watch Balloon Shop
and that you might happen
to know the guy that runs the show.
- He watches Ballon Shop too.
I thought I was the only one
at school who watched it.
Really?
- Yeah.
I wish he would've said something.
But anyway, my older brother runs it.
Why?
- I know that this is a long shot,
but I really like, really need
to get into this competition.
Is there any way that
you could talk to him?
- Yeah. I don't see why not.
Lee had to start getting kind of serious
after what happened two years ago,
but I'm sure it's fine.
What's your name?
- Max.
- Wait, what's your team name?
Team name?
- For pickleball.
What's your name?
- Oh yeah, of course.
It's the Pickleballers.
It's the Pickleballers.
- Solid. Yeah.
Pretty simple.
I'll tell him to add
your name to the list.
- Oh, and tell your friend
to come talk to me about the show, okay.
- Okay.
- I guess we're in.
(students chattering)
- Are you sure this guy is any
good, Spence?
- Absolutely.
It says he's the best
friend on his website.
- Like he says he's the best
or other people have said it?
- Why aren't you worried about the fact
you don't have a partner
for a team competition
for a sport you don't know how to play.
Now stop worrying about the trainer.
- I don't think this is a good idea, Max.
65,000 people have gone to the ER
with pickleball related
injuries just this year.
- Jesus. Is pickleball like an
extreme sport or something?
- Knowingly,
what he's done on Ballon Shop,
I wouldn't be surprised.
- Ola Compadres.
You three must be today's trainees.
My name is Pickleball Pete,
and I'm the best pickleball
coach this side of the highway.
- I can see that
- I'm gonna have you guys dinking
and doing Bernie's
faster than you can say Pickleball Pete.
- It's actually illegal to
drink and drive Mr. Pickleball.
- It's not illegal to pickleball yet.
I'm just kidding guys. Let's go.
- Okay, let's go.
- We're gonna do Bernies, guys.
Come on.
(feet shuffling)
(dramatic music)
- Pickleball looks a lot like tennis.
- That is tennis dummy.
The real games over there.
(ball bouncing)
What did I tell you?
Sport of kings and queens too, of course.
Come on.
- Yes.
Now, that's an awesome looking sport.
- I don't understand what this
has to do with drinking and driving,
but seems safe enough.
- [Max] I don't know what I was expecting,
but it definitely was not this.
(upbeat music)
There's a girl in the
room with no clothes on
She can be cooler, out of her mind
Give that girl a kiss
and have a good time
Come here and rock and
roll and have a big smile
Whoa
Whoa
- [Max] So what I was
beginning to realize,
regardless of Pickleball Pete's
completely useless instruction
is that pickleball
seems a lot like tennis.
- You can't handle this. (laughing)
You turn Max.
- [Max] And I played
tennis for eight years.
- Just like I showed you.
(upbeat music continues)
- Holy,
- It was so much fun.
If I had known pickleball
was that much fun,
I would've started playing
a couple years ago.
Could've been a pro by now.
- Can't be a pro after only
a couple years, Spence.
- You don't know that.
- Spence, what even is Balloon Shop?
- Oh, it's great.
It's this online game show
that has like this crazy host and stuff.
Anyway, they do these insane competitions.
I had no idea that
everything happens right here
until I overheard Veronica
talking about how her
brother runs the show.
- Why'd you run away from her
house, by the way?
- I didn't.
I just forgot I had a
doctor's appointment, guys.
- Telling the truth is always easier.
- Fine. Okay.
I don't actually know Veronica,
just,
she's just pretty, okay,
and she's cool and she's funny and and fun
and everything that would
make her not like me.
So, I don't know.
I just pretended we were friends.
- I don't know, Spence.
I think you're pretty funny.
- And you're gonna be
professional pickleball players soon.
That'll make you pretty cool.
- Guess I am kind of funny.
Oh, I have to show you an
episode of Balloon Shop.
Here.
No idea what you're missing out on.
- What's up, guys?
It's your boy, Lee here,
and welcome back to Ballon Shop.
Not in my house.
Come on, baby.
Oh pow.
(Lee laughing)
Anyway, it's time to talk about
this month's big competition.
How big we talking?
Not today.
Pow.
(Lee laughing)
$25,000 kind of big baby.
Now we've done some extreme
competitions in the past.
Bowl wrestling, Ninja Star Dutch ball,
hell, we even played Russian
Roulette, (laughing)
but we haven't done anything like this.
This month, we are going real extreme.
This month we are going crazy.
Oh no, baby.
Ooh.
Boo.
This month we are playing pickleball.
32 teams all fighting for the day
for the big cash prize.
Matches start in two weeks,
so you better tune in.
Oh, absolutely not.
Hold this.
(upbeat music continues)
(water splashes)
- I think Lee might be psychedelic.
- I think the words you're
looking for is psychotic.
- He's hilarious.
Anyway, it looks like the
match is starting like two weeks.
So, - What?
- Yeah.
You should probably find a partner fast.
- Well, well, well.
It isn't my favorite little degenerates.
- [All] Hey, Mr. Kenny.
- How are we doing this fine, sunny day?
- Well, max was just deciding
how she's gonna find a pickleball partner
so that she doesn't
have to sell her house.
- Wow. Okay.
What?
- Mr. Summers is charging me
$25,000 for the coffee shop.
So I'm entering in a pickleball tournament
to try and stop Sabrina
from selling the house
in order to pay him off.
- Wow.
Okay.
What?
- Oh, we could just go to the rec center.
They have a weekly pickleball
club there every Monday.
I bet you could find a partner there.
- That's actually not a bad idea, Spence.
Later. Kenny.
- Bye, Mr. Kenny.
- Just...
Sure, everything's fine.
(groovy music)
You like, but I heard
someone said it was like a,
- It's beautiful.
- Yes.
It's like a pickleball sanctuary.
- Hey, Max.
Hi.
- You work here too?
- Oh, you know how it is.
So how many?
- There's a three of us.
- I can't play Max.
If I use a rental paddle
and it hasn't been cleaned properly,
I could contract Balamuthia Encephalitis.
- Is that even a thing?
- Oh, it's so terrible.
98% mortality rate.
- Fine. Just two.
- Oh, whoo.
And this stupid elbow.
I think I got pickleball elbow
from our session earlier.
I don't know.
- Are you serious?
Fine. Just me.
- So,
so you don't have a partner then?
- Clearly.
Okay, so you're gonna be over on Court 10,
right over there.
- Are you kidding me?
I can't play with Creepy Steve.
- I know,
but he's the only one
without a partner right now.
- You suck.
- I know.
- Hey, maybe creepy Steve
can help with the competition.
- Thanks, Spence.
Hey, the kid at the counter
said that I'm your partner.
- Well, isn't today my lucky day?
- Finally.
You ready to play a what?
- I don't know.
We might be a little bit too distracted.
- If you say that again,
I'm gonna lodge this
paddle into your trachea.
- (laughing) Oh my.
You don't have to threaten
me with a good time.
- Listen for the sounds.
What sounds?
- The sounds of the paddles.
- Here. Play with that.
You're doing great.
(ball taps)
- Okay.
I should define someone who's
really, really good.
- Hello, sweet cheeks.
I know that I'm beautiful,
but we can daydream together another time.
- [Max] Besides Creepy Steve
sparking my gag reflex,
I was starting to get afraid that
this might not actually work.
- It's our serve.
Hello. It's our serve.
- [Max] Nobody here seemed
to really know how to.
Oh hell no.
That absolutely evil bitch.
Rachel Summers.
- It's our serve.
It's our serve, man.
- For someone who's
supposed to be really good,
you sure spent a lot
of time on the ground.
- Leave her alone, Rachel.
Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
- I had no idea you were so
active in the community, Maxine.
- I guess that makes up for how actively
everyone knows you're a bitch, Rachel.
- Oh no.
- You know, I really thought
after the hole you dug yourself into,
you'd have learned your place by now.
- What place would that be?
- How about soon to be convict
unless she sells the house to me?
Does that sound right?
You're not getting the house.
- Oh, I am.
And do you know what else, Maxine?
When I do,
I'll make sure my dog shits
all over whatever room is your dad's.
- Let's go.
Come on. Come on,
- Mother of God.
Yeah, keep going.
Hey, can you have your dad pick you up?
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
- You guys are so freaking cool.
My name's Lexi, by the way.
- I'm Max and this is
Charlotte and that's Spence.
- Thank you guys for saving me back there.
Rachel's, she can be such a, - Yep.
- I guess everyone kind
of has to deal with her.
- You could say that.
- Hey, why does she have
it out for you anyway?
- We actually used to be
friends, believe it or not.
But ever since she got into
pickleball, all that changed.
- Why?
- She just can't have anybody
be better at her than anything.
And I mean,
I've won a couple competitions, so.
- I know that we don't know each other
but would you wanna be my partner
for a pickleball competition
so I don't have to sell
my house to Rachel?
- I feel like I'm missing something here.
- I need to win a pickleball competition
so I can use the cash
prize to save my house.
But I need a partner in order to do it,
and I want it to be you.
- You don't even know me.
- I already know that I like you.
And plus you don't like
Rachel, which is a bonus.
- I mean, I want to.
I really do.
I mean, she's made my
life hell this past year,
but I'm kind of scared of her.
- So help me beat her
because if I win, then you win too.
- Sure. I'll do it.
- Yes.
(chair scrapping)
To beating Rachel's stupid face.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
What the hell?
What the hell, dude.
- Hold on. Hold on.
I'm so sorry.
I didn't mean to scare you.
- Okay.
Well, have a good day then.
- Well, hold on now.
I didn't walk over here for nothing.
- Oh no.
Are we about to be kidnapped?
My parents warned me about this.
- Okay.
Now, maybe we can try
doing a fresh start, okay.
My name is a Ehhh, (coughing)
- Ehhh.
- No, no, no.
It's, Ehhhde.
- So just Ed.
- No, no.
E-H-H-H-D-E.
Now, I saw what you did
over there with that pickleball
and I overheard your conversation
and I believe I can help.
- So just to confirm,
we are not being kidnapped?
- No, ma'am. No.
You need someone to teach
you how to play pickleball,
and I'm the guy to do it.
- Okay, Ehhhde. We're gonna go.
- Thank you so much for not kidnapping us.
- You're welcome.
Wait.
Now, hold on a minute.
No. Hold on.
Just wait a minute.
- Ehhhde, can you please go
find some other kids to stalk?
- Let me prove it to you.
(gentle music)
Streetlight. (ball taps)
(ball banging)
Sandwich. (ball taps)
(trash clattering)
Paper boy. (ball taps)
(ball thudding)
- Wow.
He's like a Jedi.
- Okay, Ehhhde. You can help us win.
But I'm just calling you
Ed with an E and a D.
- Deal.
(phone ringing)
- Mr. Summer's office.
Pauline speaking.
Oh, hi Mr. Summers.
Okay. I'll send her right back.
Mr. Summers will see you now.
(feet shuffling)
(kids chattering)
- Pickleball is an ugly sport,
so if you wanna win,
you can't be afraid to get dirty.
You gotta know it like
the back of your hand.
Max, what is this section of court called?
- Service box.
- Wrong.
That's the kitchen.
(ball taps)
- Hey.
- Max, show me your strong serve.
(ball taps)
- Jesus.
- Max, what makes for a good dink?
- I don't know. Vodka?
- Wrong.
(ball taps)
- You ain't playing
tennis no more Maxy, no.
Today you gonna learn
how to play a real sport.
Come on.
- I don't think this was a good idea.
- Seems that way.
- You okay down there, Spence?
- [Ed] Two.
(Ed grunting)
(Max screaming)
- The ball must land in
front of your opponent
for your drop to be effective.
Almost playing around
Gonna hand that,
pick that being around
And I just hope to see
- Hey, why didn't I get any hockey pads?
- I don't think he likes you.
- Fire.
Let's go today.
- Oh.
Ah. Geez.
Okay.
Oh. oh.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
- Your opponent's shots can't scare you
if you're not afraid of a fastball.
- So what's with the kids?
- They're here for you, princess.
Ah.
- Damn it, Ed.
- Wrong.
You're doing great guys.
- He really doesn't seem like
he should be around children.
(Ed grunting)
- Say hello to my little friends.
- Again.
(balls bouncing)
- Better.
- [Spence] Oh.
- Go ahead.
Better.
(cheerful music)
Let go of the fear, Lexi.
It's just a baseball.
- Yeah.
Just a baseball. Yeah.
Okay.
- Traveling at 55 miles an hour.
(ball smashing)
- Goddamn.
- Ooh. Hey.
Ooh.
Oh.
Oh, you are gorgeous.
Yes.
(kids chattering)
Ah.
You kids been doing real good this week.
- Ed, where'd you learn
to play pickleball?
- Vietnam.
- Vietnam?
(bomb blasting)
- Oh my god.
- Vietnam.
- Not gonna elaborate, are ya?
- Nope.
- See, I told you,
they're gonna try and win that competition
so they don't have to pay you.
- That sneaky whore.
Guess I'll just have to
do something about it.
- I don't know.
They look pretty good.
- Shut up, Amber.
Besides, I've got something
Max could never compete with.
- What's that?
- Big boobs?
- That's me, right?
- This was so good.
Wow, right?
It was really nice of Ed
to buy us all this pizza.
- I know.
Where is he, by the way?
Oh, he's in the room
with the pinball machine.
(gaming music)
- Damn it.
I'll take a hammer to your insides.
- He should really not be around children.
(groovy music)
- Hey losers.
Enjoying your pizza?
- Well, we were before you showed up.
- Ah, Maxine.
No need to be so rude.
I just wanted to wish you guys
good luck in the tournament.
- What are you talking about?
- Oh, don't play dumb, silly.
We're all friends here, right?
I just wanted to say good luck.
Oh, and introduce you to my partner,
five time US Open Pickleball
champion, Anna Kovalova.
(groovy music continues)
- Did you actually have to buy a partner
for a pickleball tournament?
That's kind of sad even for you.
- Shut up.
You know, you better start
packing, Maxine,
'cause I'm gonna make sure
you lose a whole lot more than
this stupid tournament.
Ta-ta, losers.
(guests chattering)
- Why doesn't it taste that good anymore.
- I freaking hate Pinball.
- Me too, Ed.
Me too.
(Lee screaming)
- What are doing here?
- Hey.
Sorry to just drop by like this.
I know, creepy.
But I did recently learn that my
sister, Veronica,
added your team into the competition,
which is totally awesome, by the way.
I absolutely love when
my little sister just
meddles with something that isn't hers.
Anyway,
what she failed to inform you of
was the fee for entering the tournament.
The fee?
- Yes.
Okay. Well what is it?
- $5,000.
- What?
Who has $5,000 just laying around
for a pickleball tournament?
- I get it.
Nobody likes surprises but
I'm gonna need that money
or your team is out of the competition.
- Are you serious?
- I am really, really sorry.
But if I don't have
that money by tomorrow,
your team is disqualified.
- How do you know where I live?
Not the to worry about.
(feet shuffling)
(door creaking)
- Max,
can we talk a minute?
Not today.
- Please.
Needs to be today.
- What Sabrina?
- Can we sit down or something?
- What?
- So I went to the bank today
to talk about the settlement
or alone or anything really
to get us out of this situation.
But they basically told me to piss off.
So I know you're gonna
be upset about this,
but I went to Mr. Summers
to talk about the house.
- What the hell, Sabrina?
- Max, there wasn't another option.
I'm not letting you go to jail
and I don't have money to pay the fines.
- How could you?
- I am not doing this, Max.
I'm trying to protect you.
- It's not your house to sell.
- I know you miss him,
but this is the only option.
- I am giving them a
$5,000 deposit tomorrow
and that will buy us some time
to get through the paperwork.
I'm sorry.
- No you're not.
(feet shuffling)
(groovy music)
I know I'll be
Seeing you
- I promise you,
no one will take this house away from us.
(door knocking)
- Hello?
Oh hey. It's you.
Max, right?
I need to speak with Lee.
- Okay.
Lee, get in here.
- Geez.
- He'll be right with you.
- I'm up.
(birds chirping)
- It's 7:30 in the morning.
- I have your money.
- Why didn't you say so, girl.
Here. Hold that.
Looks like we're all squared up.
I thought you didn't have the money.
- Things change.
(parent speaks in foreign language)
- You can say that again.
You know, I don't know what you're saying.
English.
(parent speaks in foreign language)
No, I have not been playing Duolingo.
(parent speaks in foreign language)
God, she can be such a pain.
- How are you guys related again?
- They adopted me a few years ago.
- But you're like 37.
- Yes. And?
- Just didn't know they could do that.
- Well, now you do.
I'll see you later.
(feet shuffling)
(birds chirping)
- So you stole your sister's money.
- She has no right to sell the house.
- I don't know how the
rules work officially,
but I think you might go to hell for that.
- It does put a little
bit of extra pressure
on you to win this tournament.
- I'll be fine. Come on.
We have to go meet Lexi.
(feet shuffling) (birds chirping)
(engine rumbling)
(feet shuffling)
(engine rumbling)
(groovy music)
(guests chattering)
(groovy music continues)
- Hey.
You know how kids love their surprises?
- We're here.
I told the I'd be able to help, so.
- I'm starting to think I don't understand
what being kidnapped is.
- Girl, you are not being kidnapped.
We just weren't allowed to let anybody
know where we were going.
The Cambria hotel owners
were very specific about that.
- We're at the Cambria Hotel?
- Oh crap.
I wasn't supposed to say anything.
Lee's gonna be so pissed.
Please pretend like you
didn't hear anything.
- Anything for you, Veronica.
- Wow. That is so nice of you.
Okay, get ready quick.
You can follow the direction of the card
and everything should
be starting pretty soon.
So, go Pickleballers.
(feet shuffling)
Now. Now.
- Yeah.
- Wow, Spence,
you were like a little Casanova.
- Really?
Oh, thank God.
- Max,
look at this.
- Pickleballers.
Oh yes.
- Guys,
let's go win this thing.
- Hell yeah.
(dramatic music)
- Somehow, I knew this is exactly
what Lee would do with pickleball.
- What's up guys?
It's your boy, Lee, here.
And welcome back to Balloon Shop.
I just checked the numbers
before we were coming out
and we're in an all time high
with 1 million of you dirty freaks
live streaming this epic
no-holds bar pickleball competition.
This might very well be the most intense
competition we've ever held.
This is gonna be badder
than last year's hand grenade tennis,
if you know what I mean?
32 teams all fighting for the cash prize
in the title of pickleball royalty.
And I'm not about wasting time.
So let's get this moving.
The first match starts
right now and I've got team.
Keep 'Em Out The Kitchen
versus the Pickleballers.
(group cheering)
So if you ate one of those teams,
then you have gots to go.
Only competitors are allowed
inside until the final match.
Let's go.
Boo yeah.
(upbeat music)
(feet shuffling)
- Hi. It's so nice to meet you.
- Shut your pile hole, loser.
- Wow. Okay.
Was not expecting that.
- Who's playing for serve?
- I can.
- All right, captains, step forward.
- So is this like a
coin toss kind of thing?
- What are you talking about?
It's always rock, paper, scissors.
- Right?
And then we'll play hopscotch
after, right?
You are being serious.
- Hands up.
On the count of shoot.
One, two, three, shoot.
Pickleballers.
- Maybe next time, champ.
(upbeat music)
- Excuse me.
Excuse me, what?
- What are you doing?
Mom said I could come.
- Ah.
I didn't sign off on this.
- Mom said I could come.
Stop embarrassing me.
- I don't...
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- Oh.
- Whoa.
Are you kidding me?
(ball taps)
- Oh. (ball taps)
- I am fairly certain
this woman is not human.
- But she is human.
- Shut up.
Shut it, shut it, shut it.
(ball taps)
- Oh.
(ball taps)
(whistle blowing)
- Pickleballers win.
- Pickleballers take the W.
One match down.
15 more to go. (laughing)
- Sit down.
- Love it.
- Of course, of course.
Okay, big guy. Talk soon.
Apologize for the wait.
But you know how it is.
- Of course.
- So why don't we just
shoot the canary in the coal mine here.
I'm assuming you're here with my money.
- Yeah.
I've got it right here.
- Let's not make it a game show, princess.
You know, Beanie,
you've really filled out
over the last few years.
(envelope rustling)
Am I some kind of clown to you, Ms.
Dangerfield?
- Excuse me.
- Am I supposed to ride around my office
on a little tricycle?
Do I have a big red nose?
Do you go "Squeak, squeak," huh?
- I don't understand.
- Take your stupid cartoon
money and get outta my office.
- Goddamn it. Max.
- Miss Sabrina, you got two days.
(upbeat music) (ball taps)
- Oh, dear.
These girls may be calling
themselves Pink Dream,
but they are an absolute nightmare
if you're up against them.
Rachel Summers acting as team captain
but Anna Kovalova seems
like the type of girl
you might go to therapy over.
(ball taps) (upbeat music continues)
- Damn. They're good.
- Of course.
It's easy to be good when you can buy
a professional athlete as your partner.
- Go. (feet shuffling)
- Best of luck, bitches.
- I hope you choke, Rachel.
(ball taps) (upbeat music continues)
(upbeat music continues)
- I think someone may need
to find Rachel's father.
- I wonder when we're gonna find yours.
(feet shuffling)
- Well, come on now, Max.
I taught you better than that.
- Ed.
How'd you know we were here?
- Oh, well, when you two didn't show up
for the final lesson,
I assumed you're either abducted
by the Chinese government
or enrolled into an internet
pickleball tournament.
- Those are obviously the
two most likely options.
- I'm so excited you're here, Ed.
- Thank you, strange girl.
(feet shuffling)
I was just stopping by to wish y'all luck
in this overwhelmingly
questionable tournament.
- Thank you, Ed.
We really appreciate it.
I mean, it'll be nice have,
it'll be nice having
you here to root us on.
- No, I'm sorry.
I can't stay here to do that.
- Isn't that what you
just said you're doing?
- No, no.
I said that I was just stopping by
to give you my support before moving on.
- Moving on to where?
- Well, wherever the wind takes
me, you know.
I'm faded to wander the earth
in search of those helpless souls
in need of pickleball guidance
in order to save their homes
from financial turmoil.
- [Spence] Does that happen often, Ed?
- Oh, come on.
I'll see you on the other side.
- What the hell?
- The other side of what?
(feet shuffling)
- What's this?
(phone taps)
(dialer ringing)
- What the hell are you doing, Max?
(phone buzzing)
- Ooh.
Although these girls have
put on quite the show,
something's telling me
they're about to get
drop ticked out of here. (laughing)
Let's put a pole up on the feed, Tommy.
Who thinks this is it?
- Who's Tommy?
(ball taps)
- You saw him at
Thanksgiving the other night.
- No I didn't.
I thought you brought
your girlfriend over.
(upbeat music continues) (ball taps)
- Game on.
It seems like the Hulk
might not be able to get it up after all.
Womp, womp.
- Time.
(whistle blowing)
- Time.
(Lee coughing)
Pickleballers are using a time out?
- You need to let this shit go.
- Shut up.
- You shut up.
You always let your emotions take over
instead of just stop and
thinking for a second.
They're taking advantage of you.
Stop being angry and focus on the shot.
I really want to beat Rachel,
but I can't do that unless
you learn to control this.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- Well,
it seems like Lady Hulk
has found her Viagra.
- Ah, that wasn't funny
the first time you said it.
- Shut up.
- All right.
Now we're just being a show off.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
(dramatic music)
(whistle blowing)
- [Referee] Pickleballers win.
(both screaming)
- I love you guys.
- I love you too, random guys.
(group cheering)
- Oh yeah.
Max Dangerfield and Lexi Adler is like,
I got Batman and Superman
over here with pickleball paddles.
(laughing)
How the hell did you two take that win?
- It was honestly, all thanks to Lexi.
- Oh, so modest.
Lexi, tell everyone
streaming about that timeout,
which by the way does not
exist in the rules here anymore.
What were you thinking?
Invigorating.
Now let's talk about that dragon ball.
- Who the hell does she think she is?
- They honestly played really well.
- You know, I don't remember
asking for your opinion.
I'm paying you to play not talk.
(door creaking)
You know, someone needs to remind
little miss hotshot of her place
and I think I've got just the idea.
- Did you even look inside the box?
- No. Why would we?
- It's from Ed. Look inside.
(cheerful music)
- Well, this is it.
We are going to take a break.
But remember 10 o'clock sharp,
the big game, the final match,
the whole enchafreakinlada
will be live again.
Don't be that dweeb on Reddit later
trying to find a link
'cause it won't exist.
10 o'clock. Be there.
- This is insane.
We might actually be able to do this.
- I feel like we should cheers
with champagne instead of water.
- Don't worry, Charlotte.
I spiked yours.
- What were you thinking?
I could become an alcoholic.
Alcoholism leads to like
140,000 deaths per year, Spencer.
- Don't worry, Charlotte.
I'm sure you'll beat those odds.
(hands clapping)
- [Dylan] Congratulations
on the big win Max.
- Leave us alone, Dylan.
- Calm down, tough guy.
You're not the one that gets angry.
It's little Miss Maxy over here, isn't it?
- Just ignore him.
- What do you want Dillard?
- Nothing.
Like I said,
just wanted to congratulate you both
on your big win.
- Well, your message has been received.
So now buzz off.
- Oh, easy on the hostility.
Look, I'm not the one out of the two of us
with a criminal record.
- [Lexi] Max.
- I guess it makes sense
that it runs in the family.
- Are you sure you wanna go
there, Dillard?
- He's doing this on purpose.
It's just like the match.
He wants you to take the bait. Don't.
Please just ignore him, Max.
- Nah.
You can't ignore me, Max.
Let's face it,
you love to get angry.
There it is.
It's not your fault though.
No.
You see, most drug
dealers are also abusers.
Runs in your family.
You poor, poor thing.
(items smashing)
- [Max] Lexi was right.
She was absolutely right.
I should have ignored him,
but I sure as hell didn't.
And as anyone would've expected,
I fell right into their stupid plan.
- She was like a wild animal.
Honestly, I'm scared to
still be this close to her.
- Sorry, you got arrested, Max.
- It's okay, Charlotte.
- How are you doing?
- I'm fine, I guess. How is Lexi?
- She's fine, I guess.
She's still pretty upset with you.
(feet shuffling)
- Just a minute.
Just a second, okay.
Just a second. Jesus.
- You got 30 seconds.
- Lexi. I'm sorry, okay.
- You are not, Max,
because you don't know when to quit.
And it doesn't matter who
you drag down with you,
whether it's me or your
friends or your sister.
This game wasn't about you winning Max.
It was just as important to me.
But you don't care.
So.
- Lexi.
- Stay safe, Max.
- [Max] I'm gonna be honest.
I felt like an absolute
peace of in this moment.
I let everyone down.
- I'm so peeved right now.
I could literally kill
Rachel and Dylan so hard.
- We need to break her out of jail.
- We need to,
what?
- We need to break her outta jail
and bring her back here so
that she can win that game.
- Break her out of jail?
- I'm not speaking Spanish, Spence.
Come on.
(door knocking)
- I get it. You're at the door.
What?
Sure. Come on in guys.
Hey, where did you get that van?
- Miss Sabrina, we need your help.
Charlotte,
it's just really not a good time.
- But Max is in trouble.
- What are you talking about?
- She's a minor, Frank.
What the hell are you thinking?
- Relax.
No, this comes from Mr. Summers.
She sits in the cell.
How the hell does Mr. Summers
get that kind of say?
- You got an issue, take it up with him.
- I dunno what the hell's going on, Max,
but I'm getting you outta here.
- So what you're saying is
Max learned to play pickleball
so she could win a tournament
and now she got herself arrested
for assaulting the same boy
who put her in this
situation to begin with.
- Yes.
- And now you would like
me to help break her out,
which is an even larger offense,
so she can win the tournament.
- I'm so glad you followed.
I thought this was gonna
be a lot harder to explain.
- Do you two hear yourselves?
Charlotte, you are afraid
of literally everything.
How do you plan to break
into a police station?
- I can't lose Max.
I need her.
Nothing is more scary than that.
- Max made her choice multiple times.
Look where that got her.
- To be honest, Miss Sabrina,
you didn't really give her a choice.
What are you talking about?
This house is all she has left of your dad
and you were gonna sell it.
You didn't really try very
hard to see it from her side.
And I know you need to
be an adult right now,
but you're still her sister
and that's who she needs you to be
because she stood up to a bully,
the same bully who's been
mean to Spencer and I for forever,
but we can't stand up for
ourselves like she can.
She just wants to win so
that she can save this.
And I think she can,
if we give her a chance.
(phone buzzing)
- Hey.
Can I call you later?
- [Kenny] What?
No, no.
Don't hang up.
They've got Max locked up
here like a freaking criminal,
you know, all because of Mr. Summers
and his stupid donations.
I don't even care about this
job, honestly.
I'm getting her out.
Let us help you.
- What?
- Just come by the house.
So, what's the plan?
- [Charlotte] Okay.
Max is probably sitting at her jail cell,
alone and scared and thinking
she's never gonna see
any of us ever again.
So here's how we're gonna break her
out of a high security
prison and bring he home.
- Just gonna butt in here real
quick, Charlotte.
You do know Max isn't in a prison, right?
She's just being held at a police station.
- What's the difference?
- Well, one's a prison
and one's a police station.
- So she's not locked up.
- She is, but just in an overnight cell.
- Like the ones they have in prison?
Yes.
- But she's not in prison?
- Yes.
- So you could just let her out?
Yes and no.
- So is it yes or is it no?
It's not that simple, Charlotte.
Kenny can let her out,
but nobody can see him do it.
- So we need a distraction.
Someone who's loud and incessant.
Someone who's unafraid to be stupid.
Please help me.
Someone's trying to kidnap me.
I can't run any longer.
- Who's trying to kidnap you?
- Please. You need to help.
Get off the counter, please.
- You need to. She's outside.
(Spence screaming)
Okay.
- Come on.
- Leave me alone, devil woman.
Please. I don't wanna be your sex slave.
Devil. You bitch.
- [Charlotte] While we make
a large commotion in the front,
that should let Officer
Kenny sneak in and get Max.
- Come on.
You too, sir. Come on.
All right. Thank you.
You too.
Have a good night.
- Hey, I am the victim here.
I am the victim.
(dramatic music)
- [Miss Sabrina] What If there's more than
two people at the station,
- [Kenny] If there is,
the only person it would be is Gary.
And Gary has a very easy solution.
(groovy music)
- Excuse me. Sir, I need some help.
- Oh my God.
How may I help you, ma'am?
- I'm trying to locate my kids
and I could really use a man's help.
- Kids, huh?
- This cannot be the only option.
- [Kenny] It's the only option.
- Now don't you worry, honey.
I'll hope you find your kids.
- Thank God.
Yeah, there's two of them.
- Two?
Two.
- Two.
A boy and a girl.
I love them.
They're, you know my life.
- Hey, we...
Someone's trying to kidnap me.
- Hi, mom.
There you're, oh look. Thank you.
This strong man just helped us find you.
Let's go.
I've been looking for you everywhere.
Let's go to the car, okay.
Okay.
- All right.
Yeah, mom.
- Bye. Thank you.
Okay, the van's outside.
Go, go, go.
Let's go to the car.
Go, go, go, go, go, go.
- Did it work?
- You guys are freaking amazing.
- Time to go, kid.
- You got a tournament to win.
(engine cranking) (engine rumbling)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
Now this is what we call
Now this is what we call
Now this is what we call
- Woo.
Now this is what we call
- Oh my God. Woo.
This is it people, the big moment,
the moment of truth,
the moment of destiny.
The moment of pickleball.
30 teams have been eliminated.
This is the moment of pickleball.
Place your bets.
(dramatic music)
Woo.
I need both captains to meet
me for a pregame chitchat.
Where the hell is your partner?
- She's not gonna make it.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What are you mean,
she's not gonna make it.
- Oh my gosh.
You didn't hear?
Max got arrested after that last match?
Something about doing drugs
in the lobby, I think.
- Shut up, Rachel.
- You know that's not what happened.
- I can't stream a freaking
forfeit as my final match.
- Why don't you tell that to her?
She's the one that got
my partner arrested.
- I would never do something like that.
But if they can't play,
I guess you're right,
we would win by a forfeit.
- Huh?
- Don't you have anyone
else that can play with you?
- Yeah, Lee,
let me just pull partner outta my ass.
No, I didn't come with any backup players.
- Shit.
Shit.
- I'm gonna lose so many
followers because of this.
Go.
Okay.
(upbeat music)
All right. (coughing)
All right.
So.
I know we were all amped for the big,
(technical beep)
I hope you got those bets in early
'cause we have a new champion to reveal.
(door banging) (cheerful music)
- Who the hell is that chick?
(cheerful music continues)
- 9:59. We did it.
- It's all thanks to you, Charlotte.
- You know I couldn't lose you, Max.
Now go kick her butt.
You're the best.
- Oh, thank God.
Yes.
- Wait, wait, wait.
No guys.
- Yeah.
Hi, guys.
- Only competitors are
allowed inside though.
- Put your hand down.
Veronica, no.
- Listen.
- What are you doing?
- Mom said, "You have to
be nice to guests," okay.
And that's what I'm doing.
What is happening?
- Guys, come on. Don't be shy.
Come on. Come on.
- No.
- I love your outfit. It's so cute.
Come on.
- Thank you.
- Go ahead and sit down right here.
You can actually sit down next to me.
Oh, who cares about that?
Veronica.
- You can sit next to me.
Scoot over.
- Hey guys, it's Veronica Chin.
Now with my new best friends.
- I'm gonna take a break.
- Go ahead and introduce
yourself, you guys.
- Hi there.
Do you need a chair?
I'll get you a chair. Hold on.
- [Rachel] You just don't
know when to quit, do you?
- You lying to get me arrested
doesn't really motivate me
to not wanna kick your ass.
- Whatever.
When I beat you here,
at least you'll know what
your jail cell feels like.
- Do I even wanna know how you got here?
- Probably not.
- I'm really sorry for what I said.
It was way over the top.
- No, I wanted to apologize to you.
I should have listened
to you the whole time.
It's just,
it's always been easier to just let,
let it take over and I'm sorry, okay.
- You help me beat her, we call it even.
- Deal.
(whistle blows)
- Captains, step forward.
Lets rob a bank
Six, sept, huit
- [Referee] All right, ladies.
You know what to do.
Are we ready?
- Yes.
- Just do it.
- On the count of shoot.
One, two, three, shoot.
Again.
One, two, three, shoot.
Again.
One, two, three, shoot.
Pickleballers.
- Enjoy your little victory, Maxine.
It'll be short-lived.
(heavy rock music)
- Dude.
Yes. I freaking love the Pickleballers.
(upbeat music)
(ball taps)
I've been wondering why
it's happened to you now
Am I the only one who's
struggling to move on
Yeah
Guess, I felt that
this was meant to last
Now I wish I was still
living in the past
- Ooh. Yes.
Yeah
- [Referee] Pink Dreams, point.
(ball taps)
Never felt so damn frustrated
(whistle blowing)
Pink Dreams, point.
You're just wasting my time
All the feelings that I dread
And it's ringing in my head
Can't believe the words you said
Now they're ringing in my head
- Let's see what you really got, Rachel.
Somebody save me
Now we're hanging by a thread
And it's ringing in my head
(whistle blowing)
- Point.
- Are you joking?
That wasn't even close to being in.
You can't be serious.
Is there someone else
here that can do your job?
All your friends are now my enemies
- Let's give you another one of those.
Now we're hanging by a thread
It keeps on ringing in my head
(ball taps)
(group cheering)
- They did it.
Pickleball is the best sport ever.
(heavy rock music) (ball taps)
(Rachel grunting)
(group cheering)
- I don't need your help.
Maybe try carrying your weight instead.
- Babe, what are you doing?
Are you really gonna let them win?
- Do something about her.
(heavy rock music continues)
(heavy rock music continues)
(ball taps)
(balls clattering)
(dramatic music)
- Oh.
- [Lexi] Max.
- I'm fine.
It's just my ankle.
- Oh.
That was really bad.
- [Referee] Hey, are you okay to play?
- Yeah. Fine.
Just need a second.
- Max, you can't play.
I have to Sabrina.
(both laughing)
- Rachel needs to trip into a sewage drain
filled with hungry, giant alligators.
- Charlotte.
- Rachel's losing. What do we expect?
- Okay.
What are we doing here, ladies?
- This game needs to be rescheduled.
Who are you?
- Her sister.
- Well, although you are
strikingly beautiful,
absolutely freaking not.
This match is starting up right now.
Play, forfeit, but whatever you are doing,
we are doing it now.
All right. All right.
The Pickleballers have got the lead,
but they've had a bit of a stumble.
So Max, what's the call?
Are you in or are you out?
- I'm in.
- Huh?
That's the chick I arrested.
- I'm so relieved to hear you're okay.
At least now I won't have to
feel bad about beating you.
- Hey, are you sure you can do this?
- Might as well go out swinging, right.
(upbeat music)
- Score is four, serving five.
Pink Dreams to serve.
- This will be too easy.
(upbeat music continues)
What's wrong? Lose your footing, Max.
Oh, relax.
It's just pickleball.
- One, two, three.
There we go.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- Come on, compadres.
You can do it.
(ball taps)
- Let's go. All right.
I see that.
- Max,
it's not your fault.
Hey, you can do this.
But you know where to play.
Just have to wait for the right moment.
Besides if I know Rachel,
she's gonna screw it
up eventually anyways.
Right?
- Okay.
- [Lexi] Let's do this.
(cheerful upbeat music)
- Please be the one.
Please, please, please.
(ball taps)
(group cheering)
(cheerful upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
- In case you haven't noticed
the cripple's the easy target.
Hit it to the girl that can't move
so that I can win and we can go home.
It's why you were hired.
It's not that complicated.
- Back up.
- Hey.
Get outta your head.
- I'm sorry.
After everything we've done,
I'm still gonna let you down.
- Max, you broke outta prison to be here.
It doesn't matter if we win or lose.
I always got your back, pickleball or not?
- Screw this.
(ball taps)
(whistle blowing)
Pickleballer's point.
(group cheering)
- Yes. We're back.
We're back.
- What the hell was that?
- I'm sorry, it slipped.
- You can do this.
(upbeat music)
(ball taps)
- Are you kidding me?
- Tons of back spin. Sorry.
(ball taps)
(Rachel screaming)
- You incompetent little slut.
You're fired.
And you know what? You can
absolutely forget getting paid.
I'll finish the stupid game myself.
(whistle blowing)
- Ma'am, you can't play
without another player.
- You need to blow your
stupid little whistle
and start this game again.
- Oh, no, no, no.
You are not gonna play this.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Jesus, if she wants to play
alone, let her play alone, okay.
At this point, it will get us more views.
(upbeat music continues)
- Hey Max, beat her ass.
(upbeat music continues)
(ball taps)
(Rachel thuds)
(whistle blows)
- Pickleballers win.
(group cheering)
- That was insane.
Pickleballers, hands down,
the best sport on the planet.
I feel like I might explode. (laughing)
Congratulations to the Pickleballers.
Here is your big prize.
(group cheering)
All right.
- Veronica, can you sign us off?
- Really?
- All right, folks.
That's it.
That's all she wrote.
Pickleballers are Balloon
Shop's new winners.
(group cheering) (upbeat music continues)
Have a good night. (indistinct)
(upbeat music continues)
- We did it.
- I'm so proud of you.
Dad would be so proud of you.
- I'm so happy and
would love to celebrate.
But the music's really loud in here,
so could we maybe
celebrate somewhere else?
Oh my God.
You did it. You did it.
I'm so excited for you two,
- So, Charlotte tells me
that you single handedly
broke Max out of the police station.
Is that true?
- Ah, no.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's true.
- Oh my God.
You're like the coolest guy ever. Come on.
Come on.
- Okay.
- Can we go bowling tomorrow?
- I thought you were afraid
of pin setter machines.
- They don't seem so bad anymore.
I need to pee.
- Pickleball is the greatest sport ever.
- [Ed] You can say that again, kiddo.
- Ed?
I thought we'd never see you again.
- No.
I said I'd see on the other side.
I think he has a warrant.
- True.
I'll call it in.
No, I should really,
I need to call that in, actually.
- [Max] So the day was saved.
I had no idea what I was getting into
with what I thought was a
simple pickleball tournament.
But I guess with
pickleball, you never can.
And If you want somebody to love
Remember that you will
receive as much as you give
When the world is letting you down
You know that I will
always be by your side
And if you want somebody to love
Remember that you will
receive as much as you give
When the world is letting you down
You know that I will
always be by your side
(birds chirping)
- I don't care if you got the money.
Not no more.
I'm taking this house.
It's collateral for what
you did to my daughter,
my kind, innocent daughter.
- Sounds to me like you're
making a bad decision there, friend.
- Sweet Sasquatch. Who the hell are you?
- Oh, just a guy, you know.
Guy that people hire to
make their problems go away.
- Yeah.
Well I got to,
(bones snapping)
- Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Let me tell you, let me ask you something.
Do you like the idea of
shitting out your own insides?
- No.
No.
- I don't.
Oh, don't like that idea.
- Oh good.
Then what I would suggest to you
is to leave these nice
people alone forever.
Yeah. Okay.
- Oh.
Good.
- [Mr. Summers] Someone call 911.
Someone call 911.
- Pleasure doing business.
- Spence.
- Yeah.
- Did you hire a hitman?
- Yeah.
- He's looking for experience?
- He seems nice.
(upbeat music)
Is this some kind of
miracle we didn't see
Even if we're apart we're
getting burned by this
First degree
Getting close but I'm still
stuck in the underground
I can't help but falling into
Settle in
Settle down
I can tell by the look in your eyes
You're not ready to go
I am lost with my head in the clouds
So I don't really know
Standing by the edge not looking down
'Cause I want you to know
Waiting for the interstellar light
I don't need a reason to show
I know it's all about you and I
And the things we know
We will keep on falling down
But I won't let go
Is this some kind of
miracle we didn't see
Even if we're apart we're
getting burned by this
First Degree
Getting close but I'm still
stuck in the underground
I can't help but falling into
Settle in
- [Max] Hey Rachel.
- What?
- We only get one of
these so we'll use it now.
- [All] Fuck you, Rachel.
- Whatever.
This movie sucks anyway.
- Cut.
(group laughing)