Prep & Landing: The Snowball Protocol (2025) Movie Script
1
Just hear those sleigh bells jingling,
ring ting tingling too
Come on, it's lovely weather
for a sleigh ride together with you
Outside the snow is falling
and friends are calling "Yoo hoo!"
Come on, it's lovely weather
for a sleigh ride together with you
Giddyup, giddyup,
giddyup
Let's go, let's...
Tree-Scurrier to Little Drummer Boy.
All halls have been
properly decked.
Over.
Little Drummer Boy, do you copy?
Hot!
Wayne?
Hot. Gingerbread burning,
gotta go...
You didn't update
your GBM software, did you?
Self-destruct mode initiated.
Exploding in 30 seconds.
- No, stop.
- No, cancel.
You have to enter
your password to override!
Huh? What's my password?
I don't know.
It's your password.
Exploding in 20 seconds.
Oh! Got it.
Christmas. One, two, three.
Password, incorrect.
Still self-destructing in five...
- No, no, no, you're incorrect.
- Four, three...
Stop, stop counting down.
...two, one.
Merry Christmas.
Oh.
Lanny...
I am initiating
Snowball Protocol.
We will never speak
of this again.
Well, that mission was not
very tinsel, Wayne.
Not very tinsel at all.
Ahem. Zip it.
Snowball Protocol.
- Oh, right.
- Merry Christmas.
Oh, back at you, Jose.
- Merry Christmas, Alba.
- Feliz Navidad.
So wait. Do you have
any special plans for Christmas Day?
Nope. Not a one.
Oh, my family has a full day
of activities planned,
and I'd love for someone to beat
my great aunt Lori at pin
the horn on the narwhal.
She's starting to get
a little too cocky about it.
So, you in?
Oh, boy, that sounds fun.
But I don't know, we just
worked all night together.
I mean, wouldn't you rather spend
time with your family and friends?
I'm just a co-worker, right?
Oh, I thought, we...
Oh. Yeah, right.
Co-workers.
Wayne?
You didn't pick up when
I called you all eight times.
What, did you lose
your GBM again?
No.
Hi, Magee.
Oh, Tiny, hi.
You know, you know, your presence is
a gift I'd love to return.
Okay, bye.
Oh, no, no, no you don't.
The Big Guy wants to speak to
you both in his office S-T-A-T. Stat.
Not sure what you did,
because the boss usually settles in
for his long winter's nap about now.
It's probably about the GBM.
Okay.
I'll go in, smooth this over,
and we can all get out...
He wants to see Lanny first.
Remember the Snowball Protocol.
Why are you being weird, weirder
than usual? What's Snowball Protocol?
Nothing.
You're up to something.
If you lie to The Big Guy
and he finds out,
you'll be demoted...
to gift wrap.
Lanny.
Lanny?
Gift wrap.
Hello, sir.
One long night, huh?
Have a seat, Wayne.
Huh? Oh, yeah.
So...
I have something here.
Oh, my personnel file.
Is this some sort of a review?
Not that I have anything
to hide.
Well...
Lanny told me about your...
big secret.
He what?
You know, I don't know what
he told you, sir, but this morning...
it wasn't that bad.
This morning?
Listen, I've seen other operations
go way more sideways than this one.
Oh! Do tell.
Well... I don't... Now?
Oh, okay.
Well...
This one time...
I can't believe Magee called us
in for a highly classified mission.
I know.
It's super classified
and super important.
Yeah, okay.
Who called this meeting?
Glen. I should have guessed.
Which conference room, Tiny?
Yeah, what, save me the
good chair, you know the one.
He never listens.
Reporting for duty, Magee.
Good, because this is a mission
of utmost importance.
I call it operation...
Eggnog.
Meet Commodore Charles
Eggnoggington, the Third.
Nog, for short.
Aww.
Wait, I thought pets
weren't allowed at work.
They're not.
He's been sick because of
his sensitive little tum-tum
so I brought him to work
to keep an eye on him.
Which is why I said
it was classified.
You can't leave this office.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You want us to babysit your pet?
That's the big classified
mission?
Yes.
No, no.
No way. I'm out.
I'll have my mother bake you
her famous Christmas lasagna.
Triple layered with parm on top.
Double layered, parm sprinkle
to keep it festive.
Deal. I'm in.
Great.
Here's a few instructions.
Oh, and one thing.
Nog loves fruitcake
but he cannot have any.
Isn't that right, little Noggy-Nog?
If anything happens to him,
I will snap you like a candy cane.
Back in a hour.
Goodbye, my handsome
little gentleman.
That's for him, not you.
All right.
Let's start wasting one hour.
Wow. This is super detailed.
Smells like wet fur in here.
There's even a diagram
of Nog's no-no pet zones.
Don't even think about
touching his left flipper.
Come on, can't be that hard
to watch him. He's mostly blub...
- ...ber? Huh?
- Where's Nog?
Oh, frostbite.
Mail call!
For you, Zamir.
Careful.
Oh, there he is.
Target acquired.
Letter for you, Doreen.
She's headed for the elevator.
Janice. Janice.
Wayne?
Janice, hold the elevator.
Why Wayne? So you can hire more
carolers to break up with me again?
Wayne, wishes to break up
with you so here is your stuff
What? I mean, that
was her favorite song.
I get no points for knowing that?
Nope.
No!
Bye, Wayne.
Stairs.
- Janice, please!
- Oh, no, no, no...
What do you want?
Wait.
I waited long enough for you,
Wayne.
You're right, you're right.
What I need isn't here.
I'm dating someone new,
and he's on the nice list!
Oh, where is he?
There he is.
No!
That ball goes straight
to the toy factory.
Check.
Check.
Come on.
Oh!
Sorry.
Come back, sweet prince.
I don't get paid
enough for this.
Okay, where are you,
you rotten little eggnog?
Fruitcake delivery.
Oh, no. He can't eat fruitcake, Wayne.
Over the fields we go.
Screaming all the way!
No lasagna is worth this!
And with this final,
delicate flourish,
my masterpiece is complete.
No, no. No, no, no. Stay.
No, no...
His tum-tum.
Wayne, Magee is back in five.
We gotta go.
Sorry, Chef, bye.
I should have been
a sugar plum dancer.
Hey, watch out!
You almost scratched it.
Make way.
You're right, Tiny.
I don't know why Glen
called that meeting.
I mean, it was clearly a power trip
so he could feel important.
Am I right?
Has he always been
that shade of green?
Hold it together, Nog.
Tiny, you little gossip.
What was that?
Good one, Tiny, I don't know
who Glen thinks he's fooling,
but that toupee does
look like reindeer fur.
Oh, frostbite.
Wayne.
Oh, no.
- Too much fruitcake.
- Oh, no.
No, no, no. Not on the carpet.
Roasted chestnuts.
Oh! Little Noggy-Nog.
Isn't he just the cutest
little ball of mush?
Who let this window open?
He could have escaped.
Oh, well I...
Oh, no.
I'm sorry, that was me.
I almost fainted from the
excitement of playing with Nog.
Oh!
I think I found my new babysitter.
I hate fruitcake.
That Nog.
I hadn't heard that you lost him.
Oh, so...
that's not the big secret
Lanny told you about.
It was not.
Well...
If it wasn't about Nog...
...then I think
it must have been something else.
Maybe Lanny mentioned
the incident on the island last year.
Such a nervous talker.
Oh, Lanny.
Oh!
I'd love to hear all about it.
Okay.
Yuletide Island. Oh, wow.
This is so tinsel!
And very humid.
Yep, no more chimneys,
no more stockings.
Lanny, all I want now
is peace and quiet.
Have to post all of these rule signs
so everyone can have fun.
Safely.
Okay, everybody,
here is a detailed schedule.
I have a full day
of fun activities planned for everyone
before our big celebration
feast tonight.
And yes, it's laminated, so you can
take it in the ocean. You are welcome.
So organized.
Quick reminder.
Find a sunscreen buddy.
Or you'll wind up as red
as Santa's suit.
You know, Magee,
other people know how to relax.
They don't need instructions.
Yes, they do.
I can't wait to do
all the things.
I can't wait to do
none of the things.
I'll be in my hammock.
Thank you.
Okay, well...
see you later?
Well, you missed
beach volleyball, Wayne.
Luckily they said hitting the ball
with my face still counts.
Last call for jet ski rides.
Wayne, last call
for jet ski rides.
This vest fits great.
It smells like a sea dumpster.
Whoa!
Sorry, Wayne.
You missed the sand sculpture
competition.
Look, Wayne,
I made the two of us.
I didn't win,
but I tried the hardest.
Huh. Well, at least
sand castle Wayne participated.
That's it.
I am on vacation.
Nobody cares about
your schedule.
I'm just trying to relax,
but you just keep going on with your...
blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, blah, blah!
You know what, Wayne?
I spend so much time planning things,
the least you could do is participate
and show some gra...
ti... tude...
Rolling snowballs, it's him.
Renato.
Renato.
Oh.
That reminds me,
you know what I did
as a thank you,
I booked you an appointment
at Spa Navidad...
with Renato.
Renato.
What? There's no way.
I mean, he never has any
last minute openings.
Oh, I'm actually scheduled
to get a massage...
Quiet. Hey, Renato,
your next appointment is over here.
Come with me, my jingle bell.
But what about the schedule and
the rules and like the big feast...
When Spa Navidad beckons,
you must heed its call.
Okay.
I'll handle it, you go,
go relax, you work so hard.
You do so much for so many,
so leave.
Oh, you got your hand in mine.
I feel so safe.
Wow, Wayne.
I'm surprised you're taking over
as the activities director.
I'm not.
I am on vacation.
No more rules.
No more rules! No more rules!
As we embark on our journey,
join me, will you,
in some simple yoga poses.
Beginning with...
Santa's Sleigh.
Next...
Down the Chimney.
And now...
Trimming Tree.
- I don't think I...
- No, no, no. Don't think, you can.
Hold it for three deep breaths.
Oh, what's happening?
- What's happening?
- Two turtle doves.
One partridge.
And release.
You've gone straight to Yule Log.
You're learning.
Hey, Wayne.
Some of the other elves
have question for you.
Oh, were you sleeping?
And now we must relax your mind.
Yeah, my mind doesn't
relax well. I'm very worried...
All is calm.
All is bright.
Oof, you really know
how to ring those bells.
Wayne, I mean, if you aren't
gonna help them,
maybe we should get Magee.
No, she's busy.
Yeah, but...
hey, you know what?
If you're so concerned,
why don't you take care of it?
Yeah.
Sure. What are friends for?
How can I help?
Oh, okay yeah.
Yeah, okay. I'll...
Oh.
Wow.
Yeah, okay.
And on the final stage
of our journey, you must travel inward,
to your place of merriment.
Meetings.
Schedules.
Reports.
Handbooks. Labels.
Binders, pens, pencils,
files, orders, sticky notes, calendars.
I would like to thank Magee
for scheduling this meeting
It could have been an email,
but it's way more fun in person
It's 5 p.m. on Friday
but we never dream of leaving
Where would we be
without Magee?
Hiya mom, what's that you say,
you're proud of me?
Oh, really? Despite how I ignore
your unsolicited opinions
In fact, you think that all
my life decisions have been perfect
Where would she be
without Magee?
Her spreadsheets
are accurate
Her spelling's immaculate
Let's circle back
- To Magee
- Thanks, fellas.
Where would we be
without Magee?
Where would we be
without Magee?
Where would we be
without Magee?
I can't.
I don't know.
I... I don't know.
Lanny?
I hate this vacation,
and my back is burning.
Oof!
Looks like your sunscreen
buddy really let you down.
Oh, wait.
I'm your sunscreen buddy.
No more rules! No more rules!
Well, that's alarming.
This is so not tinsel.
You have achieved
total merriment.
Our journey is complete.
The Yuletides.
They summon me.
Oh, a tip is optional, but I do have
student loans, so anything is appreciated.
Magee, we need your help.
Magee?
Magee?
Are you broken?
Where's Renato?
Renato.
All right, fine.
Look, Magee,
you drive me crazy, but...
I know you work twice as hard
to make sure we can all relax, so...
thank you for planning
this whole trip.
I screwed up everything, and...
and you were right.
Oh! Did you just say
I was right?
Yes.
No more rules! No more rules!
Oh! What in the...
No more rules! No more rules!
- No rules!
- Oh, Wayne.
Coffee.
Schedule.
Bullhorn.
It's jingle time.
Yeah, to the right, to the right, okay.
That's it, take it over there.
Feast this way, Stella.
Oh, good to see you Frankie.
Charlie,
you're looking sharp. Glen.
You know, I never thought I'd be so
happy to see you back in your usual
type A, fun-scheduling self.
I suppose achieving a little bit
of merriment isn't such a bad thing.
Renato.
And sorry, Lanny.
I mean, I just wanted my vacation.
I didn't mean to ruin yours.
Glad you had my back.
Always.
I'll get you some aloe.
Yes.
I read Magee's incident
report about that.
It was very long.
Sir.
I know I messed up this morning.
I shouldn't have initiated
Snowball Protocol
and made Lanny keep it from you.
Oh, well,
that's not the big secret.
What? That's not it?
No.
No, Wayne.
There was no need
for Snowball Protocol.
Just open the file.
It's a...
birthday card...
to me.
But I never told anyone
my birthday was...
today.
Yes.
Your big secret.
Lanny discovered that Christmas Day
also happens to be your big day,
and it has always
been overlooked.
But overlooked no more.
That Lanny
sure is a thoughtful one.
"Dear Wayne,
have the most tinsel
birthday ever.
Your friend..."
"...co-worker.
Lanny."
Friendship is such
a wonderful gift.
She moved it!
She moved it!
Did you guys see that?
No more cheating, Great Aunt Lori.
Wayne?
What are you doing here?
Well...
Christmas is for family
and friends and...
you're just about
the best friend I've got.
Happy birthday, Wayne.
Merry Christmas, Lanny.
Come on in.
Hey, everybody.
Wayne's here.
Happy birthday, Wayne.
Oh, hey. Well, thanks,
thanks everybody.
Wayne, it's your birthday?
And there was a card?
Lanny!
Just hear those sleigh bells jingling,
ring ting tingling too
Come on, it's lovely weather
for a sleigh ride together with you
Outside the snow is falling
and friends are calling "Yoo hoo!"
Come on, it's lovely weather
for a sleigh ride together with you
Giddyup, giddyup,
giddyup
Let's go, let's...
Tree-Scurrier to Little Drummer Boy.
All halls have been
properly decked.
Over.
Little Drummer Boy, do you copy?
Hot!
Wayne?
Hot. Gingerbread burning,
gotta go...
You didn't update
your GBM software, did you?
Self-destruct mode initiated.
Exploding in 30 seconds.
- No, stop.
- No, cancel.
You have to enter
your password to override!
Huh? What's my password?
I don't know.
It's your password.
Exploding in 20 seconds.
Oh! Got it.
Christmas. One, two, three.
Password, incorrect.
Still self-destructing in five...
- No, no, no, you're incorrect.
- Four, three...
Stop, stop counting down.
...two, one.
Merry Christmas.
Oh.
Lanny...
I am initiating
Snowball Protocol.
We will never speak
of this again.
Well, that mission was not
very tinsel, Wayne.
Not very tinsel at all.
Ahem. Zip it.
Snowball Protocol.
- Oh, right.
- Merry Christmas.
Oh, back at you, Jose.
- Merry Christmas, Alba.
- Feliz Navidad.
So wait. Do you have
any special plans for Christmas Day?
Nope. Not a one.
Oh, my family has a full day
of activities planned,
and I'd love for someone to beat
my great aunt Lori at pin
the horn on the narwhal.
She's starting to get
a little too cocky about it.
So, you in?
Oh, boy, that sounds fun.
But I don't know, we just
worked all night together.
I mean, wouldn't you rather spend
time with your family and friends?
I'm just a co-worker, right?
Oh, I thought, we...
Oh. Yeah, right.
Co-workers.
Wayne?
You didn't pick up when
I called you all eight times.
What, did you lose
your GBM again?
No.
Hi, Magee.
Oh, Tiny, hi.
You know, you know, your presence is
a gift I'd love to return.
Okay, bye.
Oh, no, no, no you don't.
The Big Guy wants to speak to
you both in his office S-T-A-T. Stat.
Not sure what you did,
because the boss usually settles in
for his long winter's nap about now.
It's probably about the GBM.
Okay.
I'll go in, smooth this over,
and we can all get out...
He wants to see Lanny first.
Remember the Snowball Protocol.
Why are you being weird, weirder
than usual? What's Snowball Protocol?
Nothing.
You're up to something.
If you lie to The Big Guy
and he finds out,
you'll be demoted...
to gift wrap.
Lanny.
Lanny?
Gift wrap.
Hello, sir.
One long night, huh?
Have a seat, Wayne.
Huh? Oh, yeah.
So...
I have something here.
Oh, my personnel file.
Is this some sort of a review?
Not that I have anything
to hide.
Well...
Lanny told me about your...
big secret.
He what?
You know, I don't know what
he told you, sir, but this morning...
it wasn't that bad.
This morning?
Listen, I've seen other operations
go way more sideways than this one.
Oh! Do tell.
Well... I don't... Now?
Oh, okay.
Well...
This one time...
I can't believe Magee called us
in for a highly classified mission.
I know.
It's super classified
and super important.
Yeah, okay.
Who called this meeting?
Glen. I should have guessed.
Which conference room, Tiny?
Yeah, what, save me the
good chair, you know the one.
He never listens.
Reporting for duty, Magee.
Good, because this is a mission
of utmost importance.
I call it operation...
Eggnog.
Meet Commodore Charles
Eggnoggington, the Third.
Nog, for short.
Aww.
Wait, I thought pets
weren't allowed at work.
They're not.
He's been sick because of
his sensitive little tum-tum
so I brought him to work
to keep an eye on him.
Which is why I said
it was classified.
You can't leave this office.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You want us to babysit your pet?
That's the big classified
mission?
Yes.
No, no.
No way. I'm out.
I'll have my mother bake you
her famous Christmas lasagna.
Triple layered with parm on top.
Double layered, parm sprinkle
to keep it festive.
Deal. I'm in.
Great.
Here's a few instructions.
Oh, and one thing.
Nog loves fruitcake
but he cannot have any.
Isn't that right, little Noggy-Nog?
If anything happens to him,
I will snap you like a candy cane.
Back in a hour.
Goodbye, my handsome
little gentleman.
That's for him, not you.
All right.
Let's start wasting one hour.
Wow. This is super detailed.
Smells like wet fur in here.
There's even a diagram
of Nog's no-no pet zones.
Don't even think about
touching his left flipper.
Come on, can't be that hard
to watch him. He's mostly blub...
- ...ber? Huh?
- Where's Nog?
Oh, frostbite.
Mail call!
For you, Zamir.
Careful.
Oh, there he is.
Target acquired.
Letter for you, Doreen.
She's headed for the elevator.
Janice. Janice.
Wayne?
Janice, hold the elevator.
Why Wayne? So you can hire more
carolers to break up with me again?
Wayne, wishes to break up
with you so here is your stuff
What? I mean, that
was her favorite song.
I get no points for knowing that?
Nope.
No!
Bye, Wayne.
Stairs.
- Janice, please!
- Oh, no, no, no...
What do you want?
Wait.
I waited long enough for you,
Wayne.
You're right, you're right.
What I need isn't here.
I'm dating someone new,
and he's on the nice list!
Oh, where is he?
There he is.
No!
That ball goes straight
to the toy factory.
Check.
Check.
Come on.
Oh!
Sorry.
Come back, sweet prince.
I don't get paid
enough for this.
Okay, where are you,
you rotten little eggnog?
Fruitcake delivery.
Oh, no. He can't eat fruitcake, Wayne.
Over the fields we go.
Screaming all the way!
No lasagna is worth this!
And with this final,
delicate flourish,
my masterpiece is complete.
No, no. No, no, no. Stay.
No, no...
His tum-tum.
Wayne, Magee is back in five.
We gotta go.
Sorry, Chef, bye.
I should have been
a sugar plum dancer.
Hey, watch out!
You almost scratched it.
Make way.
You're right, Tiny.
I don't know why Glen
called that meeting.
I mean, it was clearly a power trip
so he could feel important.
Am I right?
Has he always been
that shade of green?
Hold it together, Nog.
Tiny, you little gossip.
What was that?
Good one, Tiny, I don't know
who Glen thinks he's fooling,
but that toupee does
look like reindeer fur.
Oh, frostbite.
Wayne.
Oh, no.
- Too much fruitcake.
- Oh, no.
No, no, no. Not on the carpet.
Roasted chestnuts.
Oh! Little Noggy-Nog.
Isn't he just the cutest
little ball of mush?
Who let this window open?
He could have escaped.
Oh, well I...
Oh, no.
I'm sorry, that was me.
I almost fainted from the
excitement of playing with Nog.
Oh!
I think I found my new babysitter.
I hate fruitcake.
That Nog.
I hadn't heard that you lost him.
Oh, so...
that's not the big secret
Lanny told you about.
It was not.
Well...
If it wasn't about Nog...
...then I think
it must have been something else.
Maybe Lanny mentioned
the incident on the island last year.
Such a nervous talker.
Oh, Lanny.
Oh!
I'd love to hear all about it.
Okay.
Yuletide Island. Oh, wow.
This is so tinsel!
And very humid.
Yep, no more chimneys,
no more stockings.
Lanny, all I want now
is peace and quiet.
Have to post all of these rule signs
so everyone can have fun.
Safely.
Okay, everybody,
here is a detailed schedule.
I have a full day
of fun activities planned for everyone
before our big celebration
feast tonight.
And yes, it's laminated, so you can
take it in the ocean. You are welcome.
So organized.
Quick reminder.
Find a sunscreen buddy.
Or you'll wind up as red
as Santa's suit.
You know, Magee,
other people know how to relax.
They don't need instructions.
Yes, they do.
I can't wait to do
all the things.
I can't wait to do
none of the things.
I'll be in my hammock.
Thank you.
Okay, well...
see you later?
Well, you missed
beach volleyball, Wayne.
Luckily they said hitting the ball
with my face still counts.
Last call for jet ski rides.
Wayne, last call
for jet ski rides.
This vest fits great.
It smells like a sea dumpster.
Whoa!
Sorry, Wayne.
You missed the sand sculpture
competition.
Look, Wayne,
I made the two of us.
I didn't win,
but I tried the hardest.
Huh. Well, at least
sand castle Wayne participated.
That's it.
I am on vacation.
Nobody cares about
your schedule.
I'm just trying to relax,
but you just keep going on with your...
blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, blah, blah!
You know what, Wayne?
I spend so much time planning things,
the least you could do is participate
and show some gra...
ti... tude...
Rolling snowballs, it's him.
Renato.
Renato.
Oh.
That reminds me,
you know what I did
as a thank you,
I booked you an appointment
at Spa Navidad...
with Renato.
Renato.
What? There's no way.
I mean, he never has any
last minute openings.
Oh, I'm actually scheduled
to get a massage...
Quiet. Hey, Renato,
your next appointment is over here.
Come with me, my jingle bell.
But what about the schedule and
the rules and like the big feast...
When Spa Navidad beckons,
you must heed its call.
Okay.
I'll handle it, you go,
go relax, you work so hard.
You do so much for so many,
so leave.
Oh, you got your hand in mine.
I feel so safe.
Wow, Wayne.
I'm surprised you're taking over
as the activities director.
I'm not.
I am on vacation.
No more rules.
No more rules! No more rules!
As we embark on our journey,
join me, will you,
in some simple yoga poses.
Beginning with...
Santa's Sleigh.
Next...
Down the Chimney.
And now...
Trimming Tree.
- I don't think I...
- No, no, no. Don't think, you can.
Hold it for three deep breaths.
Oh, what's happening?
- What's happening?
- Two turtle doves.
One partridge.
And release.
You've gone straight to Yule Log.
You're learning.
Hey, Wayne.
Some of the other elves
have question for you.
Oh, were you sleeping?
And now we must relax your mind.
Yeah, my mind doesn't
relax well. I'm very worried...
All is calm.
All is bright.
Oof, you really know
how to ring those bells.
Wayne, I mean, if you aren't
gonna help them,
maybe we should get Magee.
No, she's busy.
Yeah, but...
hey, you know what?
If you're so concerned,
why don't you take care of it?
Yeah.
Sure. What are friends for?
How can I help?
Oh, okay yeah.
Yeah, okay. I'll...
Oh.
Wow.
Yeah, okay.
And on the final stage
of our journey, you must travel inward,
to your place of merriment.
Meetings.
Schedules.
Reports.
Handbooks. Labels.
Binders, pens, pencils,
files, orders, sticky notes, calendars.
I would like to thank Magee
for scheduling this meeting
It could have been an email,
but it's way more fun in person
It's 5 p.m. on Friday
but we never dream of leaving
Where would we be
without Magee?
Hiya mom, what's that you say,
you're proud of me?
Oh, really? Despite how I ignore
your unsolicited opinions
In fact, you think that all
my life decisions have been perfect
Where would she be
without Magee?
Her spreadsheets
are accurate
Her spelling's immaculate
Let's circle back
- To Magee
- Thanks, fellas.
Where would we be
without Magee?
Where would we be
without Magee?
Where would we be
without Magee?
I can't.
I don't know.
I... I don't know.
Lanny?
I hate this vacation,
and my back is burning.
Oof!
Looks like your sunscreen
buddy really let you down.
Oh, wait.
I'm your sunscreen buddy.
No more rules! No more rules!
Well, that's alarming.
This is so not tinsel.
You have achieved
total merriment.
Our journey is complete.
The Yuletides.
They summon me.
Oh, a tip is optional, but I do have
student loans, so anything is appreciated.
Magee, we need your help.
Magee?
Magee?
Are you broken?
Where's Renato?
Renato.
All right, fine.
Look, Magee,
you drive me crazy, but...
I know you work twice as hard
to make sure we can all relax, so...
thank you for planning
this whole trip.
I screwed up everything, and...
and you were right.
Oh! Did you just say
I was right?
Yes.
No more rules! No more rules!
Oh! What in the...
No more rules! No more rules!
- No rules!
- Oh, Wayne.
Coffee.
Schedule.
Bullhorn.
It's jingle time.
Yeah, to the right, to the right, okay.
That's it, take it over there.
Feast this way, Stella.
Oh, good to see you Frankie.
Charlie,
you're looking sharp. Glen.
You know, I never thought I'd be so
happy to see you back in your usual
type A, fun-scheduling self.
I suppose achieving a little bit
of merriment isn't such a bad thing.
Renato.
And sorry, Lanny.
I mean, I just wanted my vacation.
I didn't mean to ruin yours.
Glad you had my back.
Always.
I'll get you some aloe.
Yes.
I read Magee's incident
report about that.
It was very long.
Sir.
I know I messed up this morning.
I shouldn't have initiated
Snowball Protocol
and made Lanny keep it from you.
Oh, well,
that's not the big secret.
What? That's not it?
No.
No, Wayne.
There was no need
for Snowball Protocol.
Just open the file.
It's a...
birthday card...
to me.
But I never told anyone
my birthday was...
today.
Yes.
Your big secret.
Lanny discovered that Christmas Day
also happens to be your big day,
and it has always
been overlooked.
But overlooked no more.
That Lanny
sure is a thoughtful one.
"Dear Wayne,
have the most tinsel
birthday ever.
Your friend..."
"...co-worker.
Lanny."
Friendship is such
a wonderful gift.
She moved it!
She moved it!
Did you guys see that?
No more cheating, Great Aunt Lori.
Wayne?
What are you doing here?
Well...
Christmas is for family
and friends and...
you're just about
the best friend I've got.
Happy birthday, Wayne.
Merry Christmas, Lanny.
Come on in.
Hey, everybody.
Wayne's here.
Happy birthday, Wayne.
Oh, hey. Well, thanks,
thanks everybody.
Wayne, it's your birthday?
And there was a card?
Lanny!