Problemista (2023) Movie Script

This is the story
of Alejandro.
His mother was an artist.
And he was her project.
She gave him everything.
So, he wished for everything.
But she had
a recurring dream...
-...of Alejandro
wearing all blue...
the safe world she created,
where he'd face the dangers
she tried so hard
to keep him from.
Hi, hi, hello, hi.
Uh, my name is Alejandro.
I am originally
from El Salvador,
but I live in New York now.
Um, and I have a lot
of ideas for toys.
Toys these days are wonderful,
but they are a little bit
too preoccupied with, um...
uh, fun.
Um, I have a few ideas
for toys that include
a doll that is kind of like
a Barbie,
except she has
her little fingers crossed
behind her back.
This, I believe, will
add much tension and intrigue
to any Dream House.
Life can't be all parties.
And my personal favorite,
smartphones for Cabbage Patch
dolls displaying
their uniquely
complicated lives.
Like Marjorie, for instance.
She should have
a little picture
of a spot inside of her mouth,
which she's texting
to a friend
because she's worried
that it might be something.
Something bad.
I am career-oriented,
uh, detail-focused,
and enjoy, uh,
Alejandro did not
get the job.
It was as if he had sent
his dreams into a void.
And the void replied
with an email?
Signed by no one
in particular.
Sent by a mysterious
"do not reply" address.
So, what's exciting
about FreezeCorp
is that we are the only
cryogenics facility
in the world
that tends exclusively
to artists.
And so he got
a job at FreezeCorp.
A cryogenics facility,
In fact...
Which got him
a work visa
to stay in the United States.
Alejandro thinks
of his job as a long, careful,
but steady course.
At the end of it,
there is a job at Hasbro.
At FreezeCorp, he was assigned
to Bobby Asencio... unknown painter,
who exclusively did paintings
of eggs.
They're not eggs.
They're hope.
They are a promise,
a mystery.
What's inside the egg?
I don't know.
Is it a hen?
Is it a hen with a tragic life
or a beautiful life?
I don't know.
I don't know this hen.
You get me right, Elizabeth?
I could feel that you get me.
His wife,
Elizabeth, was an art critic.
When Bobby was diagnosed
with terminal cancer in 1996,
she decided to keep
every piece of paper
he ever touched,
becoming the guardian
of his legacy.
In the ultimate act
of perseverance,
Bobby chose to freeze himself.
I'm going
to the future.
I'm going on a long, long
I don't know what awaits me,
but maybe people will
understand my eggs there.
There is no data
that suggests
that Bobby will ever get
into the future.
this company provides
a form of euthanasia.
But that's just on paper.
In practice, if you are
approved for "euthanasia,"
you drink our patented
and then brr!
Your organs get a big chill.
And you go to sleep.
Our scientists are working
around the clock
to one day discover
how to bring
our patients back.
Life had told Bobby, "No."
Instead of accepting that,
he did the implausible.
He froze himself,
so he could hopefully
come back and try again.
found this inspiring.
After all, he immigrated
to the most competitive
place on Earth,
in hopes to become
a world-famous toy designer.
A slinky
that simply
refuses to go downstairs.
Forcing the child to go
on the journey, step by step.
The joy comes not from
watching something happen,
but by achieving it.
Was the backup disconnected?
Was the backup disconnected?
The backup is currently
All right. We...
We're closing up.
I was just
...I sign them...
She's here.
Brace yourself.
...sign a contract
without reading it?
Like some teenager getting
a phone at MetroPCS?
No, I know... I know
you read the contract,
-which is why I'm surprised...
-What's the limit?
-A limit to what?
-A limit to the amount
of times you're going
to hike the prices.
Or am I and my poor,
frozen husband
going to be held to ransom
indefinitely? Hello.
This is Alejandro. He is the
archivist assigned to Bobby.
Hi... Hi, Elizabeth,
it's so nice to meet you
and put a... and put a face
to the name.
Oh, it's very nice
to meet you too, Alejandro.
You're doing a wonderful job.
Yes, I would like
to think that the astronomical
hike in prices
for the Deluxe package,
might benefit you in some way,
but I suppose
your bosses are just
gobbling up the profits.
gobbling up anything,
it is, uh, simple inflation.
We're now getting
a lecture on economics
from the good doctor here.
Pace University, was it?
Hm. Uh, yes, but it is in the
contract as per the signed...
We can... How about...
How about we chat
in my office?
Shall we?
The backup
generator was disconnected.
Alejandro, will you,
uh, stop
by my office tomorrow?
Um, yeah. Yes. What did you...
What did you wanna talk about?
Let's talk tomorrow.
I didn't realize
I was interrupting a meeting,
shall I get you a coffee?
Oh, No...
with a challenge,
Alejandro called his mother.
Dolores was always ready
to solve his problems.
What are you talking about?
I didn't eat
your fucking Oreos,
you fucking wiener.
Hey, good night.
Good night.
Can I have some though?
-Get your own.
That night,
Dolores was supposed
to work on a monument proposal
on the subject
of "the Salvadorian artist."
But instead she thought
about Ale.
Her delicate little creation.
-Hi, good morning.
Uh, you wanted to talk to me?
Uh, yes, can I have a moment
to get settled?
Okay, you can come in.
How are you?
Great. How are you?
I'm good.
Excited to have this check-in.
this is really hard
-but, um...
-Oh, no.
But, unfortunately,
given the incident,
we can't continue having you
as a part of this team.
But nothing happened.
The backup generator
was unplugged.
And the subject could
have been at risk.
But nothing happened.
That is like removing
all the fire extinguishers
-from a building.
-And then putting
them back
before there's a fire.
It's more like parking
in front of a fire hydrant.
For which you get a ticket.
B... But why?
If there was no actual fire...
-I... B... But, uh...
-...we proved that
it's an honest mistake
and it wasn't your intention
and that you won't
do it again.
I... I mean,
don't you think...
Uh, my thoughts don't count.
You just would, you would.
-You would get a ticket.
But if you don't employ me...
-We know.
-Then, you do know, okay.
But... But then I don't...
I don't have a work visa.
-We know.
-If I don't
have a work visa,
then I can't be here.
We know.
Who is "we"?
We here at FreezeCorp.
Look, I just need
a little bit more time
because I'm already applying
for this other job at Hasbro
that I'm really excited about.
No disrespect to...
to FreezeCorp and the...
-the FreezeCorp family.
-Uh, uh...
Or... Or I can do
this part-time.
-Alejandro, I...
-Or as an intern.
-Or whatever you...
-Listen, I have to go.
-No more archive.
What a terrible shame.
Elizabeth, I am not...
You'll keep
his corpse frozen
or you're gonna throw
that out as well?
We are
simply moving Bobby
from the Deluxe Chamber
with archive
to the Basic as per your...
And will you simply
help me take his archive
to the dumpster?
Or must I break my back
doing that myself?
No one is going
to be moving...
Don't you belittle me!
You middle of the road,
middle, middle, middle
middle, middle manager!
around the clock to one day
-Hi. to bring
our patients back.
Cannot believe that woman!
Screaming at me like that.
Threatening to throw
Bobby's body out.
Did you see that?
I'm very grateful to you,
by the way,
for helping me like this.
What were we thinking?
And what are we supposed to do
with all this stuff anyway?
I can see Bobby's going
to wake up in the future
and his wife's gone
and thrown away
all his things!
I don't think you
need to throw anything out.
He didn't leave an insane
amount of stuff.
I... I would argue
you never needed
that big space to begin with.
So, why don't you just make
room for it somewhere else?
I don't suppose you would
have any time for a little
side project, would you?
What do you
normally use this space for?
Oh, I live here.
I live, uh, part
of the year here,
part of the time in Maine,
and part of the time
in Asheville.
Did you hear the way
she screamed at me?
How do you put up with her?
-Did she ever yell at you?
I... As it turns out,
I got... I got laid off.
Oh, Alejandro!
That woman, she is out
to ruin us all!
And she's a thief,
as well, you know.
Um, well, sure.
And she...
doesn't listen to reason.
I put up quite a fight.
Thank you.
-Thank you for...
-Thank you.
For the job
and the memories...
But mainly, she...
they didn't wanna
sponsor me anymore.
I'm actually from El Salvador.
Oh, El Salvador?
-And those, uh, nuns
they killed in the 80s, yes.
R... Right. So now,
I'm looking for...
for a new job.
-Oh you are?
-That will maybe
-sponsor me.
I'm not sure I could, uh,
offer anything formal.
But, uh, maybe freelance?
And, uh, then we could see?
Did you use FileMaker Pro
at the facility?
No, we used Google Sheets.
No, no, you can't...
you can't compare that
to FileMaker Pro.
It's basically
the same,
except FileMaker is harder
to use and not free.
Do you know FileMaker Pro?
Yeah, I love it.
Oh, my goodness,
that's splendid.
Oh, yes.
My, uh, former assistant,
Celeste, she ran away
with an Italian,
and I could not
even begin to tell you,
but anyway, she had
this bright idea
of setting up a database
so that I could keep a track
of all Bobby's paintings
wherever they were, you know,
two over here,
couple over here
in this gallery,
and to have a sense of order
to have a sense
of perspective.
I mean, FileMaker is the
Cadillac of archival software,
you know, recommended
by Gagosian,
recommended by the Whitney,
and apparently very, very easy
to set up.
And that's what
she promised me.
And that's what she failed
to deliver.
Because the thing about
Celeste of course,
is that she was on drugs.
-Oh, no.
-She was constantly
coming in with dirty shoes,
always in the alleys.
You know, that's a very, very
clear sign.
And the whole thing
just didn't work!
None of the databases matched.
Any assistant of mine
will have to come up
to Maine a fair bit.
Do you garden?
Oh, I... I could garden.
Oh, that's great, so you can
drive us up there.
Oh, no, I... I don't know
how to drive.
I'm looking now for
the pictures of the begonias,
you'll see them
when you drive us up there.
But the begonias
this year were so beautiful,
and the sweet peas'
just beginning,
just the little shoots
And I think next year,
the pinks particularly...
Oh, my goodness,
where are these photographs?
I'm really thinking
that I couldn't have seen
these photographs.
Oh, my goodness me, this
software drives me insane.
I can never, ever find
what you want,
and it's so hard on the nails.
They said it's likely
to be in the Dropbox now.
Now, we... we... we... Maybe
in the iCloud...
How do
you get into the iCloud thing?
They told me once,
and it made no sense!
Where are these photographs?
Let me... If...
You know, when
you're looking for something
-and you can never find it.
-May... May I...
I want someone
to invent the thing
where you say, "Look
for the photograph
"of the blooms," and then
suddenly there are...
And, they probably have,
but nobody's told me about it.
I bet I can help you
with that. If...
No, no, no,
They say it's simple,
let's hear from them,
how simple it is!
Right this minute.
I was on with them
most of the day yesterday.
Apple Support.
To securely verify
your iden...
No, none of those options.
In a few words,
please tell me why
you're calling.
-Thank you
-for contacting Apple...
-Human being.
Please hold
for an Apple advisor...
No, none of those
options. No. Other.
-Hello, ma'am.
-Are you still there?
-Well, of course, I'm here.
Where else will I be?
You've been holding me hostage
on this call.
-I need my photographs.
You're holding up
an important meeting!
Uh... I'm sorry
about the hold.
But w... w... where are...
where are my photographs?
You've hidden them again,
you've hidden them from me!
Your... Your pictures should
be on the Photos app.
Well, I deleted
them because you told me
that there would be a back up
in the Cloud!
What is the Cloud
anyway? I don't understand!
They wouldn't just disappear
like that, ma'am.
Stop interrupting me! Listen!
I need my photographs.
You... You've hidden them
from me,
you keep hiding things
from me.
Where are my photographs?
You have erased my memories...
And if that isn't enough,
I was forced to switch
to voice memos
instead of texting!
Because your tiny, tiny,
tiny keyboard is
too bloody small...
Well, you can enlarge
the keyboard.
Don't interrupt me!
I want to text
with my fingers!
Alejandro Martinez.
Yes, hi. That's me.
Mr. Khalil's ready for you.
Thank you.
All right, so, you got
to get another sponsor.
Pronto, rapido.
What happened
to the toy people?
They won't hire you?
I don't know.
I mean, t... t...
they're just not going to be
taking applications
-for a while.
-Okay, okay, look,
you... you don't have a while.
You have a month
to find someone
to co-sign your visa,
and if you don't,
you have to leave the US.
Yeah, I... I... I've been
working on that,
I... I started freelancing
for this lady,
um, she's, um...
Well, whatever, it'll just be
a few hours here and there.
Also today? Well,
that's rapido.
You think this lady can
sponsor you?
I... I mean, we'll see.
"We'll see."
That's a better slogan for us.
We'll see.
Look, other thing is,
you can't take money
right now.
Hope this lady's not
paying you.
W... What do you mean?
You can't take money till
they officially sponsor you.
The rules
of the game are as follows:
First, he must find a sponsor
for a work visa,
then he must submit it
by paying application
and lawyer fees
totaling up to around $6,000.
And only then,
is Alejandro allowed
to earn money.
Money, that he needs so
he can submit his application
to well... earn money.
And he must do it before
the fall
of the last grain of sand.
The maze is impossible
to navigate,
unless of course, he's willing
to bend the rules.
Cash. You need cash.
Misguided journeys...
IKEA BILLY bookcase...
is Craigslist.
Come on, we're going
to this shitty party.
Oh, I... I can't come.
But thank you.
Why not? Just come.
This invite said it was
an "all white party"
so I'm going in all red.
It's gonna be
at this shitty loft,
-and everyone there sucks.
-Um, thank you,
but I have a lot
of stuff to do.
I... I just have to solve
this mess.
Okay, well, I'll text you
if it ends up being fun.
Tell me...
No bed bugs, clean Bowflex.
Um... no, that's okay,
just... just jobs?
-Marketing Associate.
-No, something more cash.
-It is the gigs you seek.
-Exactly, yes.
Cleaning boy kink...
Oh, um...
Any... Anything else?
Sell salon packages,
make up to $200 an hour...
Yes! Yes! Yes, perfect!
Hi, can I ask you a question
about your hair?
Hi, quick question
about your hair? Okay...
Hi, can I ask you
a question about your hair?
this is Elizabeth,
speaking to you
as if from a walkie-talkie,
since that man told me I could
not enlarge the keyboard.
This is so last minute,
but could you meet me
in 20 minutes?
I'm late. I'm...
I know I'm late,
I'm so late, I don't know,
how late am I?
-Oh, that's okay...
-Can you move the table
-so I can get in?
-Oh yeah. Okay.
It's a little bit
of a squeeze.
-Okay. Great.
-Yes, well, I've...
-How are you?
-I've just been held up.
The other people
holding me up all day.
-Oh, no.
-Obstacles, obstacles.
I went to the upholster,
you know, for the little bench
under the window?
-The... The nook?
-The nook!
The nook, yeah.
Exactly, very good.
Yeah, so I was getting some
new, um, cushions made,
you know, and I went to pick
them up, and they're horrible!
-They're awful.
-Oh, no.
They're red velvet,
if you can imagine. Excuse me?
Excuse me? I've been waiting
for a very long time.
Uh, is something going on?
Are you closed?
Oh, I'm... Uh... I'm...
I'm sorry. Do you...
-Do you know what you'd like?
-I'd like this charged.
Red velvet. Who am I?
Cleopatra, lying around
eating grapes?
She said that I had picked it.
As if.
Uh, they have a...
they have a goat cheese salad
-that looks good.
-Oh, this menu...
What is it with walnuts?
Walnuts, walnuts, walnuts.
It's like a cafe
for squirrels.
Uh, well, the...
well, the walnuts,
they go very nicely
with the salad.
Do I look like I need
educating on fine cuisine?
Oh, no, no, no.
I wasn't saying that...
Don't scream at me.
Uh, I wasn't.
I'll... I'll have
the goat cheese salad.
But is it possible to do it
with no cheese?
Yeah. Awesome.
Um, oh, well, all right.
I'll have the same thing.
But I'll have it with cheese.
And, uh, and uh...
An iced tea...
They like it
when you say "please."
It's like giving them a little
morsel for them to nibble on.
Don't you like goat's cheese?
Oh, no. I'm... I'm...
I'm vegan.
Who else is vegan?
Um, I don't know.
-Um, uh, a lot of people...
-Bill Gates.
Someone awful.
Extortionate. I mean,
one of the most horrible
I've had for a long time,
and not for the first time.
I am vowing never
to come here again.
Uh, how many paintings is
the gallery returning?
Oh, uh, they never understood
Bobby's work,
that's the truth of it.
The poor paintings,
they used to sit
in the back room,
and they'd never made
any attempt to market them.
Um, but there's interest now.
-Yeah. I, um, I bet.
-That's the thing.
Having a young man
of your intelligence,
who now has an insight
into Bobby's
working methods, uh,
I truly believe that together,
we could curate a show.
-Right? And I mean,
curators have no imagination.
I mean, none of them see
what I see.
-But if we
do their homework for them...
We could pitch it around even.
We could pitch it around,
Was there something wrong
with your salad, Alejandro?
Oh... no.
-No, no, it's fine.
-It's just I can't help
noticing that they neglected
to hold the cheese
as we specifically asked
them to.
Oh, I don't think
you said no cheese, uh,
-I'm sorry.
-We did and, uh,
this young gentleman cannot
eat cheese.
It... It's... It's...
It's fine.
You tell him.
-I, um, I'm vegan.
-He's allergic.
-To goat cheese or...
Oh, I apologize. We'll...
We'll refund the salad.
Well, that's not what we want.
Uh, O... Okay, I...
I just don't know what else
I could do, I...
-I can't go back in time.
-Fetch somebody else who'll...
-I'm sorry...
-...say something different.
I'll get my supervisor.
Oh, you're gonna hold us
hostage now?
Okay, so get my supervisor
or don't?
Those are the choices.
I either get him
or I don't get him.
So, Elizabeth, you... you were
mentioning pitching
the show around?
-I don't have any more time
to waste on you.
Uh, yes,
once we have gathered
the paintings,
we curate a show,
and we get a reputable gallery
to take them, you know,
Pace, maybe even the Whitney.
And we sell them,
and pay Bobby's bills.
And if you help me do that,
I promise you,
I'll sponsor you...
...and we'll get your visa.
That sounds...
That sounds great.
It's so simple, Alejandro.
And this is it. This is it,
the sky's the limit.
Now, let's go
get those paintings.
Should Alejandro go help her?
She'll be right out,
How's everything
going, Celeste,
since you worked for me?
Your skin looks better.
Thank you.
And how are you? Are...
Are you okay?
Well, there is no colored ink
in the Epson.
-And no cartridge.
-Mmm. The Epson.
I was always intrigued
by your insistence on us
having an Epson.
You swore by them,
so you said,
and then you chose the most
expensive cartridge
on the market,
and then lo and behold,
suddenly gone
in a puff of smoke,
flown to Italy, and I could
never quite work out
how you managed to fund
that particular escapade.
So you think I broke
into your house,
stole an ink cartridge,
bought a plane ticket,
flew to Italy and paid
for my Master's
by presenting them with ink?
Easy, Celeste.
Remember your skin.
Oh, I thought you had five.
We already returned two.
Oh, the database is
in such disarray,
I mean,
nobody can find anything.
Alejandro's going to have
to sort it all out.
He's, uh, helping me curate
an exhibition, by the way.
-An exhibition?
A solo show,
just Bobby's eggs?
Do I have to speak slower?
Good luck with that.
Maybe a Marriott
breakfast buffet
will show some interest
if you're lucky.
Now she has taste.
Just try a pseudonym this time
if you're going to write
your husband a glowing review.
laughing at me.
They think I slept with you
for exposure.
Don't scream at me.
They hate my eggs.
Bobby, I was
just trying to help.
Well, she was...
she was on something, right?
Drugs. Drugs and vodka.
-She reeked of it.
-I mean, I...
I can smell it
all the way from here.
Thank you for all
of your help.
You're probably thinking,
"What am I doing,
running around
with a crazy lady?"
No, I...
I... I enjoy working with you.
Where are my bloody keys?
I wouldn't put it past her
for taking them.
I mean, she was
always taking things
when she was with me.
I'm not going back there!
No, here. Let's open your bag,
and we'll search
for everything, and we'll...
we'll put every item here,
one by one.
-And we'll find it like that.
-One by one. Yeah.
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-Good thinking.
-Um, um, um, I'll hold this
-while you take this out.
-All right. Huh.
-That's good. Very, very good.
-One by one.
One by one. One by one.
-Is it any of these?
You know, people are always
asking me,
why don't you relax?
Why are you always so tense?
Why are you always obsessing
about Bobby and..."
You know, they don't know
what it is
to really want something,
you know?
To really, you know,
be on a mission,
all... all out there. Alone.
Bobby met Elizabeth
at a show at his commune.
He was feeling down
because his work did not
make the show.
He felt invisible.
-Until she came in.
-Make your own rules up...
You invited... You invited me!
Excuse me, ma'am.
-No smoking in here.
He could tell no one
understood her.
Just like no one understood
his eggs.
He invited her upstairs
to show her his paintings.
What do you think?
That's beautiful.
This one
I call A Shy Egg.
His cousin...
-Intellectual Egg. Yeah.
-Oh. Right.
-And that one is
-Eggs for Dinner.
-I want people who don't even
like art to see the hope,
the mystery,
the beauty,
and one day be like,
I dream of having my own show.
-Thirteen Eggs.
-Thirteen Eggs.
-Yeah, but no one likes them.
The unlikely pair
became a love for the ages.
She saw him,
and he didn't walk away.
I wanna tell you that I called
the company today.
And they said
they're gonna send a syringe,
and you will have
to inject me.
Don't look at me
like that's weird, okay?
You're gonna have to inject me
so you can freeze my inside
as I slowly die.
I know
this is not fair to you.
And it's really,
really expensive.
But we could cover the fees
if we sell
some more paintings.
We'll make it work!
I'll make sure of it.
We have... We'll sell
your paintings.
Gonna have to paint
some bigger eggs.
How are
the shelves coming?
Uh, great.
I just think that we have
the wrong screws, maybe.
I think we need to put
that Blue Egg
back where we had it before,
because we need to finish
with something very strong.
-But I am not now...
I'm not sure now about whether
any of this is gonna work.
God, I'm not sure.
I don't know. I don't know.
What about...
ending it with this one?
Oh, no, Alejandro!
Not that one!
That's so unresolved.
Look at that egg,
it's just like negative space.
Bobby didn't even sign it!
I know, I know, but... but...
There's just something
that feels so...
hopeful and...
optimistic about it.
Even if it's so messy
and... and unresolved. It's...
I don't know,
it just feels so...
so Bobby, in a way.
I happen to like
the later work.
When it... When it's just
at its most erratic
and optimistic.
I think it's because they were
made to fund his journey.
They were made
with the intention
of waking him up.
With the hope that he would
wake up in the future.
And that way, the show doesn't
end with an ending,
but with a...
"to be continued."
"To be continued."
I like that.
Yeah, like his life.
Thirteen Eggs.
-Thirteen Eggs.
Why did you say that?
'Cause he wrote that
in his sketchbook...
Thirteen Eggs!
Yeah, Thirteen Eggs.
That was Bobby's dream show.
That was the exhibition
he always wanted.
Well, then...
Let's call it that.
That's it! That's our show.
Oh, Alejandro,
that is brilliant.
That... You are brilliant.
That is perfectly...
We have it.
We have the concept.
We just need to track down
the rest of his paintings
and find the final piece,
and then we have the show.
So, if you can add this one
into the FileMaker now.
And then we can have
a fully comprehensive list.
So, you go and, uh,
enter in the database,
so that it all syncs,
that way I have access
to the exact same database
from here or the iPad,
or in Maine.
You absolutely have
to make it all sync up,
so there will, at long last,
be order.
Can you show it to me?
Show it to me now.
There's no reason to overwhelm
the software at this point.
With excess information
like that.
-It's a very delicate system.
-Powerful, but delicate.
-Oh, right. Okay.
Wait in line
for the new iPhone, $60...
Teach me
to use Twitter so I can
be famous! $100... $20...
Untangle my necklace...
Clean the windows...
Paint the wall...
Wake me up at 3:00 a.m.
to make my flight...
A toy truck with
a tire that slowly deflates.
Children must play knowing
that they're running out
of time.
Coat check
at Lower East Side night club,
$75 plus tips.
Give me my coat, man.
I lost the ticket,
but I told you it's black.
-Yes, black.
And while Alejandro
confronted things
he never thought he'd face,
Dolores faced a challenge
of her own.
Not being able to help.
Felicity just got
a Venmo request
for the California Roll
she had with Marjorie
two weeks ago on a playdate.
A blow she didn't see coming.
Hi, can I ask...
So sorry.
I'm sorry.
Hi, can I ask you
a question about your hair?
Have you ever wondered
how to get salon-quality
for 50...
I was wondering should
I, like, send you
an invoice or...
-or how does that work?
How many have you sold?
Oh, um...
I think I haven't... yet.
But the, uh...
the Craigslist ad said $200
-an hour?
-Yeah, if you sold something.
But it... it gave
an hourly rate.
The promise
was riddled with trickery.
But I...
I've worked at least,
like, 10 hours.
I need...
-to get paid.
-Look, man.
You're barely speaking up,
you're whispering
to these ladies,
Look at these two over here.
Hey, ladies.
I like that jacket.
That's yellow, right?
-Just a real quick question
-about your hair.
I knew...
Not front row,
I hope.
Oh, Bingham, this is
the magnificent Alejandro,
I've been telling you about.
This is Bingham,
He's our newest,
well, our first foundation
-And... And he gardens.
And uh, what's even better...
...he's gonna drive me up
to Maine.
Oh, great!
Hey there, Ale.
He's a very clever boy.
He's at Columbia,
I've known him
since he was a tiny, tiny tot.
Uh, his father is a very,
very, uh, important collector.
-Oh, wow.
-Bingham's father
forced him
to take the internship
after he wrecked the car.
And I have other talents too.
I'm not implying
-any nepotism.
And what I should have
mentioned is
he knows FileMaker Pro.
-Oh, good.
-No. No, no.
I said I might be able
to figure out FileFinder Pro.
More importantly, Ale,
what is this lady doing
not using Google Sheets?
I mean FileMaker Pro is
the Cadillac
of archival software.
That's what we say. That is...
That's the truth of it.
And look he... he put up
the shelves.
Oh, yeah. And
you did have the right screws.
Oh, are you sure?
Uh, yes, it's just drywall.
What kind of screws
did you think you'd need?
Well, hopefully,
it doesn't fall off
in the middle of the night,
She's been having
trouble sleeping.
I think it'll be okay,
Um, anyway, I have to go.
I have a hot date,
uh, with a photographer
who wants to take my picture.
Well, have a wonderful time.
Don't keep him waiting.
Tell your mother
I sent my love.
-And kisses.
-I'll see you soon.
A breath of fresh air.
What a team.
You two are going to have
a lot of fun in Maine.
I know which...
I know which painting
we're missing.
-Oh, which one?
Egg on Yellow Satin.
The... The egg is blue?
No, no, no, no!
The egg is grey!
Blue Egg on Yellow Satin.
-Where is it?
-She has it. She's got it.
Look for it, look.
She was Dalia,
Bobby's most promising
Now this is your best egg.
It's brilliant.
I'm so jealous.
This will look great
at your place.
She stole it.
That's our 13th egg.
Without it, there is no show.
Elizabeth immediately noticed
that the painting was gone.
And Bobby came clean
about giving it to Dalia
as a gift, to which
Elizabeth said...
That pathetic tramp stole it.
They never even
spoke about the affair.
Well, the good news is
that we have
so many other fantastic...
-No, no, no, we need Blue...
-...paintings that...
... Egg on Yellow Satin.
I know, but
-given that we don't have...
-What, I can't have
Blue Egg on Yellow Satin?
Well, have you tried
reaching out?
I screamed as much as I could!
Right, right.
I don't know, the whole thing
seems like a terrible idea.
What, the show?
Well, I said
to her, "Name your price."
And... And what she wanted
was an apology.
She wanted an apology from me!
An apology for what?
An apology
for I don't know what!
Messy, Unresolved
Nightmarish Interiors
by Dalia Park
Spoiled an Otherwise
Fantastic Show
at Columbia University
by Elizabeth Asencio.
I can't deal
with these people, Alejandro.
It's not healthy for me,
it's not good for me.
No, no, we're not
doing the show.
No pro bono, kid.
Why are we even talking?
Has this lady agreed
to sponsor you?
Um, not... not... not yet,
but I'm working on it.
And even if it does work out,
I... I have to pay for half
of your fees upfront, right?
Listen, uh,
you need to get creative
and find a way
to get that money.
No, I'm... I'm on it.
My little Craigslist jobs are
barely keeping me afloat,
and with things at work
are getting tricky...
Hold on a sec, okay?
What's going on here?
I think she won't let us
mail her the notice.
No! No.
"No, no, I already told you
I don't have
a permanent home address."
"Sometimes I stay
with my cousins,
sometimes I stay
with my Mom if she's sick."
"My mail gets lost there."
"It's better for me
to pick up
the documents here."
Okay, we can do that.
Okay, listen. I'm going to get
started with the paperwork.
But make yourself
indispensable to this lady.
As for the money, well,
how much is your rent?
You have a message.
Do you wish to speak
to Craigslist?
Need to rent
a room in Bushwick, $850.
Two roommates.
Need subletter immediately.
What's goin' on?
This is Travis. He's going
to sublet my room.
Hey. What's going on?
-Uh, room's that way, Travis.
Um, yeah, I can't afford
to make rent
and pay for the lawyers
and all the other
immigration stuff,
so I thought,
"Well, why don't I just
sublet my room,
"and sleep on the couch?"
-If that's okay?
-Oh, I mean, of course.
Can you just tell him
to be super careful
around my baby whatever's?
Hey, uh, do you have Wi-Fi?
Yeah, uh, it's on the fridge.
I mean, this is just, like,
I keep getting these emails
that are like,
"I put your necklace on,
and it immediately broke.
"Can you refund me?"
And I'm like,
"No. Sorry."
I mean,
this sucks so much for you.
Can't you just apply to
the toy thing from your mom's?
Oh, I can only apply for it
from within the US.
So you have to stay in the US
to apply online,
from within the US?
But it's online.
So, like, it could
be anywhere.
Oh, um, I'm sorry,
I have to go.
Just change your IP.
-Uh, I'm looking
for Dalia Park.
Yeah! I'm... I'm Dalia Park.
Oh... Oh, great! Uh...
Hi, uh, my name is
Alejandro Martinez.
-Uh, I work for, um,
Elizabeth Asencio?
Leave. Your boss is a monster.
-Why do you think her husband
was handing out paintings
to girls left and right?
-I named my price,
an apology.
That's it. They're free,
you know?
Well, actually,
that's what this is.
Um, Elizabeth?
Dear Dalia,
I won't lie, I'm still
deeply, deeply hurt
by what transpired
between you and Bobby.
I cannot even bring myself
to say this to your face,
and God knows that if I tried,
things would get messy,
so I wrote it down instead.
I'm not just hurt
by the affair,
but for the name calling,
the demonizing,
the pain that came
with the fun you had.
Galleries all over downtown
referred to me as the Hydra
for many years.
I have, however,
come to realize
that my retaliations
through the cruel
and childish review
of your painting
in the Columbia group show
was worse.
The truth is...
...I didn't even bother
to spend a minute
with your painting.
I did not see your work.
I saw my pain.
And I weaponized it.
I understand
that my venomous words
contributed to you not being
included on other shows,
causing a domino effect
on your career.
You did not deserve that.
And Bobby does not deserve
for his legacy
to be forgotten over
my mistake either.
The painting
in your possession
is the only thing keeping us
from getting Bobby a show...
...which we need to get some
money to keep him frozen.
Frozen! What a narcissist.
But you called him out
on that even before I did!
Take my sincere apology,
not for me,
but for Bobby, and the time
you spent together,
w hich I'm now willing... accept brought him
immense joy.
I hope you've made it
to the end of this
without me jumping at you...
...and betraying
what I actually feel.
Sincerely, Elizabeth.
Thank you.
Can I at least read
the damn thing?
No, no.
-Well, we got the painting.
We did. We did, we did.
We have our 13 eggs,
thank you, Alejandro.
Did you see how many
children she had?
All from different fathers,
-She runs a daycare.
-Ah! There he is.
Our knight in shining armor.
-Oh, me?
-Oh, you.
We'd be lugging this
through the subway
if it wasn't for you.
Oh! Finally, you answer,
I've been waiting an hour
on this virtual queue.
If I may please
have your name and account...
-And your name is?
-Ah, she's
-such a nightmare.
-I get it, and I do
feel bad for her
but, like, yikes.
This is no way
to do business, is it?
Could she be making this
any harder on herself?
Well, I have,
I've been on for days
talking to your company.
It... It's no surprise
to me...
I don't think
she's a nightmare. such disarray.
Well, how much longer
will it take?
Well, thank you for nothing,
it's a total waste of time.
-Shall we?
-Sure. To the loft?
Uh, well, Alejandro
and the painting to the loft
and I need to get to the MEbefore the Klee closes.
Okay, uh...
those are in
opposite directions.
Well, the Klee closes
in an hour and a half,
and Alejandro has to get
to the loft to work urgently.
They're in
opposite directions,
I'm sorry. I'm... I'm not
like you Elizabeth,
I can't just bend
the rules of time and space.
Don't make me go in an Uber!
Not after all they've done.
She's banned
from the app.
Bingham can take you
to the MET.
And you'll take the car
to the loft.
The car would cost
him 18% of his net worth.
Looks like she's all mine.
Could she make this
any harder on herself?
What's a visa?
When I was in high school,
I probably ran over someone,
but my dad just fixed it.
Oh, hello, hello.
That show was
so horribly curated,
I could only stay
five minutes.
They're, uh... They're, uh...
They're clever.
Your ideas, very clever.
Is this your dream?
Your big dream, the toys?
You know, I've been
applying through this thing
called the
Talent Incubator Program.
Well, you have talent.
Thank you. Um...
Yeah, no, it's just
complicated because
they only look at applications
once in a while
and they haven't
gotten back to me.
They? Who's "they"?
-"They" who?
-Well, "they"...
They, the company.
You don't get anywhere in life
if you're hoping for answers
from an entity.
Get a name and become
a problem for them.
Anyway, first things first,
The show, and then your visa.
And we have a lot
of work to do.
Hey, what's going on?
One of those snakes
that pop out of a can,
except this snake comes
with a little sign hanging
from its neck saying...
Hello, Alejandro, this is
Elizabeth, it's Saturday.
11:00 a.m., Bingham and I
are making good time
on the road,
he's just stopped
to get some tea.
Uh, kombucha, good
for the digestion, he says.
Let me know if you have any
troubles getting in the loft.
The first gallerist
arrives at one,
the Whitney at four,
let's hope they love the eggs.
I hope you're well.
Let's teach you how to drive,
so we can do this trip
together next time.
You're sorely missed.
We did it.
We found all your paintings.
Catalogued them,
and synced the databases.
We will get you your show.
There will, at last... order.
Thank you.
we need to talk.
I just clicked on
to the database here in Maine.
-Oh, okay.
-And, uh,
the database does not match.
On my iPad, Alejandro,
it declares
that Egg on Red Satin is still
at the Kraushaar gallery,
when you know perfectly well
that we brought it back
to the loft.
-Yes, I know that...
-Oh, I'm sorry,
was that a different Alejandro
who brought all those
paintings back
with me to the loft.
having devoured
an entire salad on my dime
at, uh, Le Grainne's Cafe?
No, no, that...
-That was me, I was there.
-All the salad
your twin could eat!
What's so difficult
about this project, Alejandro?
No, it... it's...
it's not difficult.
No, it's not...
I don't think it's difficult.
I remember
distinctly asking you
to code Blue Egg as UMBIMC.
Under My Bed
In Maine Cottage.
Same, but couch.
Okay, I think...
I think maybe...
-Excuse me?
-Well, I think, maybe...
-You thought maybe?
-Let's just see
if you're connected
to the Internet...
You think that I may not be
connected to the Internet?
Well, I don't know,
I don't know
if you're connected to
the Internet, I'm not there,
-so how could I...
-Don't scream at me!
I'm not screaming. I just...
I'm just saying
if you want me
to help you from here,
then you need to tell me
what's going on there.
I'm your IT now?
Oh, I see, so I suppose
since I work for you now,
it's time for me to start
misrepresenting my abilities
-at FileMaker Pro?
-Do not scream at me!
How can we
have a show
if the databases are a mess!
No, no.
Elizabeth, let me talk.
The whole point of the...
of the database
is to tell us
where the paintings are.
And we know where they are,
they're right here
in front of me.
You could solve
a problem,
but she'll come back
at you with two more.
She's the Hydra.
-My iPad still has
games on it.
You told me you'd look
into removing the app,
but then you also told me
that you knew FileMaker Pro,
so here am I
with Darts on my iPad.
What? What?
Well, okay, okay, all right,
Elizabeth, are we talking
about the databases or
are we talking about the iPad?
This is what is going
to happen.
You are going
to burn a disk...
-Burn a disk?
-...of the master copy
of the database in the loft.
Then you are going to...
...make copies of that CD-ROM,
and overnight them here,
the Asheville house
and extras at Bingham's.
-No. No, Elizabeth.
-I will want tracking numbers.
-I will corroborate...
-No, no, no.
...the information
matches the information
on the iPad
when I get to those computers.
Let's just make
sure that you're connected
-to the Internet.
-We can revisit
the sponsorship conversation,
once I have the disk!
Even if I did that,
I'm not sure
how you would insert
a CD-ROM into your iPad.
I can take a crack at it.
Bingham will take
a crack at it.
No, Elizabeth.
I don't have a lot of time.
Days at this point.
Alejandro, I question
if you are ready for this job.
Elizabeth, I'm ready.
I... I... I'll figure it out.
We're so close.
Elizabeth, please.
Okay, okay. I'll...
I'll send you the disk.
All right, that'll be $250.
For overnighting these three.
You need them to get there
tomorrow, right?
This fucking machine.
Do you have cash?
B... B... But I'm sorry,
that's just not the amount
I should have.
According to my calculations,
that is not the amount
I should have in my account.
What balance
were you expecting?
Well, I... I don't know.
Zero would be great.
Just get me to zero.
Again, every time
you overdraft,
the bank must impose
a penalty of $35.
So, uh, what?
Like an $8 sandwich
becomes a $45 sandwich?
Again, that's the policy,
Mr. Martinez.
But that... that
makes absolutely no sense.
I distinctly recall making
a cash deposit.
Hm. And that deposit
was flagged
as potentially fraudulent.
So, it's on hold now.
For your protection.
Right, but then that hold
made me overdraw.
For your protection.
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry, but do I seem
protected right now?
Why would you let this happen?
Why not just have
my card get declined?
That's not the way
things work.
But that is the way
things should work.
Otherwise, the bank
is just benefitting
from my misfortune.
From the misfortune of people
who can't afford to make
any mistakes.
From people who have
no margin of error.
It's... policy.
It is what it is.
No. Look at me.
Just look at me.
I know that you can hear me.
I know that you can hear
my voice
when I tell you that I know
that this is not your fault.
You didn't do this,
the bank did this.
And there is no reason for you
to be defending them to me.
Please. Please, at this point,
I'm not even asking
for my money back,
I'm just asking for you
to tell me
that you agree with me,
because I know that you do.
I know that there's still
a person in there.
And I know
that she can hear me.
I stand with Bank of America.
So I, like,
started crying,
like, full Pisces move.
Tear, tear, tear. So dramatic.
Oh my God, Alejandro.
-Hey, what's up?
Nothing... Nothing much.
Nice. Uh, this is Lily.
Michael's GF. She's kind
of been holding court here,
inviting a lot
of her friends over,
even though we're trying
to get ready to go to a thing.
So much fun.
Wait, Alejandro,
are you from El Salvador?
Yeah, I was telling you
about Alejandro.
He's gonna be the coolest
toy designer at Hasbro.
I don't think you were, Spray.
I literally was, just
one minute ago, telling you.
My God.
I'm, like, always
on a little trial
-with you.
Feel like I would have
But hello.
Wait, speaking of,
have you guys seen
the Cabbage Patch things?
So funny.
What... What's the...
What's the Cabbage Patch
posted it.
They, like, gave them
and they, like... It comes up
with a funny message like,
"Oh, are u ghosting me?"
"Ah, your Uber's here."
So fucking funny. Like,
who thinks of that?
How did they think of that?
I love it.
I'm here for a... for a job
that you've shown me before.
-Sell salon packages...
The one I kept turning down.
Cleaning boy.
That one.
A boy to clean
my apartment.
You clean...
I watch.
And then...
Who knows...?
I... I... I'm Alejandro.
Yeah, I know.
So do you think
the buzzer was broken or...
That works.
You've done this before...
For kink, I mean?
You can drink and work.
Not precious about it.
-Do the windows.
Hm? Hm, hm?
Um, nice, nice windows.
Um, I don't... I don't know
I'm just...
I'm just saying nice...
nice windows.
-You okay?
No, yeah.
-Pants off.
-Oh, yeah.
You can put 'em next to you.
Backpack too.
Oh. Yeah.
Keep cleaning.
Keep cleaning.
Turn and face me.
Um, while cleaning...
...or how do you prefer...
I was gonna ask,
"Is this okay?"
Um, uh, yeah, it's okay.
You're not freaking out?
Uh, no.
-You're beautiful.
-Um, hi.
Um, my name is
Alejandro Martinez.
And I applied to be a part
of the Hasbro Talent Incubator
Program, and I...
And I... You... Well, you had
to turn me down,
but I know that... liked my ideas
because one of the...
one of the ideas
on the application...
I... I... I just...
I just wanna apply again.
And I know that there hasn't
been a lot of time,
but I'm... I'm running...
I'm running out of time. And
since you do like my ideas...
I'm s... s... sorry,
what's your name?
You...You...You reading this,
do you make the decisions?
Or... Or... Or who does?
'Cause if I could
just talk to someone,
person to person, so... so...
so you could hear me
and I know there's rules,
but just...
Just give me a name.
Who do I talk to? I just...
I... I... just...
Did you lose your keys?
No, I gave them
to Travis.
I don't know who that is.
-He's the subletter.
He's why I can't go
into the room.
-Hey, hey...
-Are you okay?
You think I don't
want to go to parties?
You think... You think
I don't want to go to bars?
I can't... I can't even sleep.
You can go in there. Trent's
not even there right now.
And I don't want
him to come back
and find me in his bed.
It's your bed.
And he's literally never
even here.
-Yeah, yeah...
-What do you mean
he's never here?
I mean, I've never seen him
one single time,
and I don't know what
his face looks like.
Oh, okay,
awkward turtle...
Do you know FileMaker Pro?
Bingham will take
a crack at it...
What's a visa?
I'm s... I'm like...
I'm gonna just go.
Why did you
want to see me, then?
What's the matter?
Uh, nothing's the matter.
Hey, um...
would you be interested
in becoming a paralegal?
What, like...
You mean, like, here?
Yes, here.
I can get you on a visa,
get you some training.
All right?
It's not rocket science.
You're a hard worker and
most of all, you're patient.
You speak Spanish,
you're sane.
Uh, you seem trustworthy.
These are basically
the requirements
for being a paralegal.
Thank you but I...
I don't even know, um, law.
You know how to email?
It's just emails.
Emails and... and filing.
You know,
straightforward stuff.
Oh, I'm... I'm sorry.
Do... Do you mind if I take
this? It might be about work.
Uh-huh. Go. Go, go, go, go.
Uh, hello?
Hi, this is Nadine Moore
from the Roosevelt Island
Fine Arts Gallery,
is this Alejandro?
-Hi! Oh, my God, yay!
So I got the PDF
for the show you sent out.
Sorry we hadn't replied.
I'll go straight to the point.
We were supposed to have
a show open tomorrow night,
had a lot of dealers and,
well, the community excited
but due to circumstances out
of our control, whatever...
Point is, we want
the Asencio show.
We want the eggs.
We need the eggs!
Insane, I know.
Like... Like...
Like, tomorrow?
Where's my disk?
I suppose
you'll be charging me
by the minute for this call.
I got Bobby a show.
Excuse me?
A... A solo show,
a... a real show.
Oh, then
the New Museum called back?
No, no, no, um...
Well, what, then?
The... The Whitney...
-No, it's, um...
-...would like to revisit?
It's The Roosevelt Island
Fine Arts Gallery.
Say that again.
Elizabeth, I know
they're not as reputable...
Those people show evil
Mickey Mouses
and glittery Marilyn Monroes.
Yes, that investors do pay
a lot of money for.
You lied to me!
What... Okay, what lie?
What is a lie? I don't believe
I have lied, Elizabeth.
You told me
that you would only pitch
to real institutions!
Nobody's gonna
take us seriously now.
-This is the only way.
-Think of the eggs.
You're trying to destroy me,
to destroy his legacy.
You only came to me,
so that you could go
laughing off to the bank
and then scurrying off
to Guatemala.
I know you're in cahoots
with these people.
And I know you want to sell
his eggs to the Chinese,
so that you can get
your green card.
For what? So that you can make
Barbies for Toys-R-Us?
Well, don't bother!
Don't you worry
your pretty little head.
I am fine.
I don't need you.
I have something better.
I have Bingham.
Do you think
he gives a shit about you?
Do you think he gives a shit
about Bobby or any of this?
You are not from
the same universe.
He has no idea what it's like
to desperately want something.
He knows FileMaker Pro.
No one knows shit
about FileMaker Pro.
He's helping with the website.
He knows all about
the widgets.
You know nothing of widgets.
Why are you bringing up the
website right now, Elizabeth?
Why... Why are you making
everything so difficult?
Oh, that's rich
coming from you.
who adore difficulty.
You cannot get enough of it.
You seek it out
round every corner.
Not Mexico City, not Montreal,
not Berlin.
Nowhere easy to migrate to.
And not a doctor,
not a software designer.
Nothing that anybody's
gleefully handing out
visas for.
An aspiring... maker of toys.
if we're doing that,
why don't we address
the elephant in the room?
You want to keep
your husband frozen.
You want to be
this high-society lady,
keep eating your $28 salads.
With what money?
We're both so tired,
Let's go sell some paintings.
Yes, well, you need
to drop the theatrics,
We have work to do.
I'll see you soon.
We're doing well on time
for once.
Have you ever been to, uh,
Roosevelt Island before?
"It's practically Manhattan."
That's what
the curator woman said.
Three times on the phone.
Elizabeth, Elizabeth.
My beautiful Hydra.
How dare you?
I know.
What I don't know
is how you ever
put up with me.
How do you put up
with this stupid, womanizing,
soon to be frozen
cutlet of a husband?
Don't forget a narcissist.
It's your scales.
Stop it.
Where's Bingham?
Well, I have it
on good authority
that he's been
working the docks.
How do you mean "working"?
There is an underbelly
of closeted fishermen
that little tricks
like Bingham fall into.
Bingham was not
working the docks.
In fact, he was just awarded
a Guggenheim grant
to further pursue
being cute in the arts.
The deviousness in those eyes,
You'll be hearing all about it
on 20/20,
you mark my words.
Where's Blue Egg
on Yellow Satin?
I thought you had Blue Egg
on Yellow Satin.
It's on the station!
The egg is alone in Manhattan!
Someone will steal the egg!
-No one's gonna steal the egg.
-No, they will!
We have to stop the tram.
They can't... They're not
gonna let you do that.
Stop the tram! We have to.
I don't think
you can even do that.
-They can't stop the tram.
-Stop the tram.
-Excuse me?
-We have to go back.
There's a very, very valuable
egg on the station.
We need it for the show that
will save my husband's legacy
and his body.
We can't do that, lady.
Stop the tram now,
-Listen, lady, I can't.
-Right now, stop it!
-What do you mean?
-I can't.
I'm a customer
and I'm telling you to.
-I can't.
-Serve me!
-Serve me!
-Who the hell are you?
Do it now!
I can't... I can't do...
It's not possible.
Do it now, immediately!
Do it now, instantly!
So we only have one wall?
Well, it's our best wall.
I thought this was
a solo show.
Just you, solo on this wall.
We have to reserve the
other areas, unfortunately.
We already have some interest
in the eggs.
Well, they're
clearly not all gonna fit.
Yes, they won't all fit,
The show is called
Thirteen Eggs.
Well, we can hang some
near the restroom,
but that'll still only get you
up to 12.
Call it Twelve Eggs. Easy.
It's like an even dozen.
I'll tell you
what will happen now.
We are leaving this place.
We are taking our eggs.
You can put them
in your back office.
You can put them
in your catalog
and send them in your
email blast, I don't care.
But there will be no
compromised version
of this show.
So it's all
or nothing, then?
It's all or nothing.
They didn't get
Bobby his show,
but they sold
all 13 paintings.
"Just call it an even dozen."
Oh, Bobby, forgive me.
Forgive us.
Do you think he'd hate this?
I'd like to think he'd have
known it had to be this way.
For him, for me.
For a wonderful young man
by the name of Alejandro.
You just seem so convinced
that this is gonna work out.
That he will wake up
in the future.
That he will be healed.
Probably sounds idiotic
to you.
No, it really doesn't.
It sounds brave.
He took a nap.
That's the extent
of his bravery.
Oh, poor him.
How gutsy.
Journeying into the unknown.
Meanwhile, who stays behind
and makes sure
that he arrives safely?
The Monster.
I'm the thorns
that protect the rose.
I assured him
I was strong enough for this.
if it works out, my Lord,
I'll... I'll be so old.
A handsome young painter
married to some old hag.
No, Elizabeth,
when he wakes up, he's gonna
have a lot to thank you for.
You've had a lot of patience.
It takes a very,
very special person
to deal with the impossible.
Alejandro, many apologies
for you to be receiving
this information now
but when you return
to the loft,
you're about to discover
my inert frozen body.
I just drank the
cherry-flavored CryoPreserve
to freeze my insides and catch
up with Bobby in the future.
Well, wish me a good trip.
Elizabeth, Elizabeth.
My beautiful Hydra.
Maybe I'll come and join you.
Will you do me a favor?
Will you wait for me?
I'll be waiting for you
with my arms wide open.
I called that woman
ahead of time.
They know to come
and get me now.
She said, "Elizabeth, I didn't
know you were terminally ill.
"I'm so sorry."
Anyway, with what
we made tonight,
we'll be able to keep us both
frozen for a while.
But also, there's enough to
repair the cottage and sell.
There's already interest
in the loft.
I've written to realtors.
Please see to this, and by God
please, please, please, please
sort the databases
and have them reflect
the most recent sales.
I'll have much work to do
when I get back,
so I'll need this done
I trust the government
won't have any issues
with my sponsorship of you,
even though they know
I'm not around.
I certainly hope not.
I've left you a glowing
recommendation letter
addressed to
"Whom it may concern."
I wasn't sure who to address
it to. The President?
I've left detailed
for the accountant.
This process has been
so difficult.
But I must say, meeting
someone who understands me
has made it all feel
You've been
an absolute delight.
I'll miss you.
I'll miss you drinking wine
at a snail's pace.
I'll, uh, miss you getting
that little smile on your face
and writing in
your little notebook.
No, listen, Alejandro,
it's gonna work.
The doctors, you know, who
told Bobby he was gonna die
and that nothing could be
done, they were imbeciles.
Anything can be done.
I think we've proved that
to ourselves now.
All I needed was
a little more time
and, uh...
and I think I needed you.
So thank you
for getting the show
and, uh, I want you
to promise me
that you don't just plump
for these, um,
unacceptable options
that the thoughtless people
who run this planet are gonna
put in front of you.
When they tell you you can
only turn left or right,
you let them know
that you're going up.
Always send the food back,
uh, stand up for yourself
and remember, it's not just
a matter of everything
or nothing at all.
It's everything or everything.
Oh, and by the way,
the name of the idiot
at the toy company...
is Brian Kissane.
I had to negotiate
an entire day
of the phone tree
for that one.
Go and inform him
that you work there now.
Go, do it. Do it.
You know, Alejandro,
I really...
I really...
cannot believe that with
all that time on your hands,
you did not fix
those databases.
I need to talk to Brian.
-Is he expecting you?
But I need to talk to Brian
right now. Instantly, please.
-Thank you.
-I'm sorry.
If he is not expecting you,
how did you get in here?
You seem confused.
I just need to talk to Brian.
Is that Brian? That's Brian.
Brian? Brian?
-Brian? Hi.
Can you excuse us? Brian and I
need to have a little meeting.
Thank you.
-Hi, Brian.
My name is Alejandro Martinez.
We've been corresponding
quite a little bit
regarding my application.
Oh, did your aunt or someone
call the other day?
Yeah, see,
I felt compelled
to kindly follow up,
given that you have
implemented one of my ideas.
-Excuse me?
We have a problem here, Brian.
Because it seems like
you took one of the ideas
from my application,
then you presented it
as if it were your own.
What are...
What are you referring to
when you say I took your idea?
Don't scream at me.
The little messages
on the Cabbage Patch dolls'
That was
in my application, Brian.
Susana has a screenshot
of an annoying post
that Marjorie made.
Uh, I mean...
Look, it is possible that...
the two of us
both came up with...
And isn't it also possible
that if I were to post
a side-by-side comparison
of the idea that I came up
with a year ago
and the idea that you guys
produced a month ago,
well, that wouldn't
go so well?
Yes, that is possible.
And don't you think
there is a world
where if I were to go
to your bosses and tell them
that you're taking ideas
from people's applications
and not even hiring them,
they wouldn't love that?
There is also this world, yes.
Yeah, so, actually, I think
this is what's gonna happen.
You are going to hire me
and you're gonna put me
in the Hasbro Talent
Incubator Program.
Sure. Great. Yes.
We are always looking
for new talent.
Well, from within the US
and its territories.
The dropdown menu
in the application, Brian.
I think that you've never sat
and thought about this,
that it only allows you
to select
one of the 50 states
or its territories.
And if you're not applying
from one of those places,
then you're out of luck,
'cause the website
won't let you through.
-Did you know that, Brian?
-No, I did not know.
Oh, well,
now you know.
So this is what's
going to happen.
You are going to call
the website people
and you're gonna say,
"Hi, it's me from upstairs.
"I want you to put 'other'
as part of the options."
That way, no one gets stuck
in that step
and anyone can apply
from anywhere.
And you're also going
to sponsor me,
which is really expensive
and really long.
But you're gonna do it and I'm
not even gonna hear about it.
You're just gonna send me
an email saying it's all done.
-Okay. Great.
So I know my tone has been
a little... stern.
But I want you to know
that I look forward
to seeing you
every single day.
-Wonderful. I can't wait.
and its many competitors
all woke their clients
from their slumber
after finally
figuring out how.
Some had been frozen
for a few years prior,
some decades ago.
Upon waking up in the future,
patients stayed
under observation
at the Center For
The Recently Awoken.
May I serve you coffee
or tea prior to the mingle?
None of those options.
- May I serve you coffee...
-Leaving. Done.
...prior to the mingle?
I am not going
to this idiotic mingle.
-The mingle is mandatory...
None of those options.
Coffee, fruit cup.
-May I offer something else?
-Leaving. Done.
Could you please leave
the little guy alone?
You are, once
again, siding with the robot.
Humiliating me in front
of a toaster on wheels.
We're supposed
to relax, Elizabeth.
-Ease into this thing.
-I am very relaxed!
I'm very relaxed as well.
What are you looking at?
And what do you do?
a very talented painter.
And, uh, we are looking
to mount a solo show
just as soon as we can locate
all his paintings.
Well, we'll see, you know?
-We'll see what?
-I don't know.
Do people even care
about paintings anymore?
To be honest, I'm not
sweating that right now.
What do you do?
What do you mean
you're not sweating it?
I'm a poet.
-Because of this whole thing,
I'm in a substantial amount
of debt, so...
I'm sure you write
beautiful poems.
Welcome to the future, ma'am.
The bar will reopen
after the speeches.
I would like a glass
of white wine.
-Please. Oh.
-Hello, everyone.
And welcome to the future.
Now, I bet
you're all wondering,
"I woke up for this?"
Uh, sorry, but the bar will
reopen after the speeches.
I would like
a glass of white wine.
I mean, the wine is there
and all of these people
are drinking.
And I don't see
the difference.
Um, if you could just wait
a few minutes,
it'll just be a moment.
No, you're the one
who's supposed to wait.
-You're the waiter, right?
-If you just listen
to the speeches
and enjoy the speeches.
What speeches?
I can't hear any speeches.
As you can see...'re each wearing
different colors.
Each color
represents the decade
that you went to sleep in.
I cannot help
you at this moment.
That woman's crazy.
-You could...
-If you'll excuse me,
I'm here to serve you.
However, we are closed.
I'm not sure
I... I do feel
like excusing you, in fact.
And don't walk away
from me like that.
You say you're here
to serve me,
but you're clearly not here
to serve me
anything other
than insubordination.
And quite a lot of cheek.
Ma'am, you're not
allowed to be back here.
Well, I think I am.
I mean, if you're not allowed
to serve me any wine,
I think I'm allowed
to come back here.
And by the way,
the state of this kitchen
is absolutely revolting.
Don't walk away from me.
And don't scream at me
like that.
Oh, my God.
That's Alejandro Martinez.
He designed all those toys,
My Little Problems,
with his mother Dolores.
Alejandro lived
a long and beautiful life.
Near the end of it,
he took a nap
for hundreds of years...
Is that really you? stand in front
of a cave, wearing all blue,
lovingly looking
at the Monster.
Oh, my God.
Just as Dolores
dreamt many years ago.
The databases are out of sync.
They do not match.
I compared the copy
on my laptop,
which has the key
for the letter D missing,
which you might think
is a suspicious
and maybe
convenient occurrence...
They are done.
The databases match.
The project is finished.
What do you mean?
I know FileMaker Pro.
Do you promise?
I did it.
Order reigning supreme
at last?
Elizabeth? Come out.
Let me show you
how the databases match.