Purple Rose of Cairo, The (1985) Movie Script
Cecilia, be careful.
Are you all right?
You`re gonna like this one.
lt`s better than last week`s.
lt`s more romantic.
Miss, l wanted oatmeal
before my scrambled eggs.
Sorry. l`ll get it right away.
l get cereal, too.
And a doughnut.
Cereal and a doughnut. Right.
Listen, there`s a new movie
at the Jewel starting tonight.
l didn`t even get
to see last week`s.
You missed it? lt was wonderful.
l love Jane Froman.
And James Melton
plays a hotel porter...
and then he becomes
a radio singer...
and then an opera singer.
The music was just beautiful.
The one that l liked
is ''Okay, America.''
l saw that twice.
That was great.
When she threatens
to kill Lew Ayres--
l love Lew Ayres` looks.
Do you think he`s married?
Are you crazy?
He`s married to Ginger Rogers.
They got married on a boat
off the island of Catalina.
They live in Beverly Hills
and Hollywood and Spain.
He used to be married
to Lola Lane...
but Ginger`s better for him.
Where`s my toast?
Coming right up. One second.
Ginger used to be
married to Jack--
Let`s go, girls.
Let`s go, Cecilia.
Your sister is slow.
But she`s still learning.
Ladies, there`s a depression on.
A lot of other people
would like this job...
if you can`t handle it.
No, l can handle it.
lt`s OK.
Ginger used to be married
to Jack Culpepper...
who l think took out
Ruth Chatterton before--
That`s the second one this week.
l`m sorry. l`ll pick it all up.
Come on, Cecilia. Shape up.
Hey, Monk, here comes your wife.
Boy, am l glad to see you.
You got any dough?
Tips weren`t
so good today.
Come on, give me something.
l`m busted.
l hear there`s some jobs opening
up over at the ice factory.
No, there`s nothing.
l was there.
Harriet Rufus says
all you guys do all day...
is just pitch pennies...
and make passes at
the girls who walk by.
Harriet Rufus is a douche bag.
Listen, l gotta save the rest
for groceries and stuff.
All right. Got it?
What are you doing here?
You want to go
to the movies tonight?
There`s an early show.
-l can`t.
-How come?
The guys are
coming over tonight.
-Again?
-You don`t like it?
Well, all you do
is drink and play dice...
and l wind up getting smacked.
l gotta get even, don`t l?
l owe everybody in town.
You`re never home anymore
except to play dice and cards.
Meanwhile, l gotta
take in extra laundry...
after work to pay the rent.
What do you want?
Did l close the factory?
You didn`t use
to be like this, Monk.
l got a lot on my mind.
You think l like
scratching around for work...
living like a bum
the last two years?
l don`t know how much longer
l can go on like this.
Listen, the country`ll
get back working again.
Things are bound to get better.
l promise. l`m crazy about you.
You never pay
any attention to me anymore.
Plus, l thought if we could
go to the movies tonight...
you could forget
your troubles a little.
You like sitting
through that junk, OK?
l`m going to shoot crap.
Go to the movie by yourself.
You make passes at
the girls who go by?
You`re not my boss.
And don`t give me that look.
You`d think l was a criminal.
Come on. Give us a hug.
Just one. Come on. All right?
And don`t come home late.
l worry.
All right? See you later?
Let`s go!
Two, please.
Two.
Just one tonight, please, Doris.
Thank you.
-Evening, Mr. Ruskin.
-Nice to see you.
Popcorn, please.
Jason, l`m bored.
l`m bored with cocktail parties
and opening nights...
and evenings at the opera
and weekends at the races.
A few days in Paris
might be just the thing...
to get the creative juices
flowing again.
l can have George cable
the Ritz for the usual suite.
l`m not talking about Paris.
l`m talking about someplace
completely different...
like Morocco or Egypt.
A boat trip down the Nile
sounds so romantic.
l`ve got just the dress
to wear to the pyramids.
We can leave next week,
spend a couple of weeks there.
Maybe stop in Casablanca
or Tangiers...
as long as
we`re hopping around...
and still be back in time
for the opening of my new play.
To Cairo and Morocco
and Tangiers.
To all the exotic and romantic
places in the world.
There`s another room in here.
lsn`t it divine?
Everything`s
so perfectly preserved.
lt`s quite lovely.
l just don`t want to feel
a bandaged hand at my throat.
Hi there. Who are you?
We`re sightseeing.
We thought we were alone.
You gave me quite a start!
l`m awfully sorry.
Tom Baxter--
explorer, adventurer.
l`m doing a little
archaeological work.
A real-life explorer!
l`ve come in search of
the Purple Rose of Cairo.
lt`s an old legend
that`s fascinated me for years.
A pharaoh had a rose
painted purple for his queen.
And now, the story says, purple
roses grow wild at her tomb.
How romantic.
And you?
We`re going back
to New York tomorrow.
lt`s been
a refreshing two weeks.
We should bring him back to
New York to meet the Countess.
She loves anything
in a pith helmet.
Right!
l will say it`s tempting.
Then it`s settled.
You can explain to us...
what we`ve been looking at
for the last two weeks...
and we can take you
nightclubbing.
lt`s so impulsive, but...
l`ll come!
Why not?
What`s life without
a little risk-taking?
Who knows?
A fortuneteller predicted
l`d fall in love in New York.
Table for six, please, Arturo.
Six, sir.
Now, ladies and gentlemen...
the Copacabana
is proud to present...
Miss Kitty Haynes.
Ours could be a different sort
of love affair
Those busybodies
couldn`t help but stare...
l think our poetic
little archaeologist...
is about to make a discovery.
Ain`t life swell?
Open the champagne.
l feel like getting
plushed to the scuppers.
Let`s take it
one day at a time
And who cares
just how it turns out?
Check, please.
Miss, could l have
the check, please?
Come on, the man
wants his check!
Sorry. Here you go.
So what were you thinking about?
A penthouse, the desert,
and kissing on a dance floor.
So you did go to the movies
last night after all.
The people were so beautiful.
They spoke so cleverly
and do such romantic things.
The guy playing Tom Baxter
was so cute!
Do you want to go
to the movies after work?
l would love to see it again.
What is this, a social club?
l got a sink full of dishes.
Come on, girls!
Thanks a lot.
Well, l am impressed.
You have yourself
quite a place here.
l still can`t get over the fact
that 24 hours ago...
l was in an Egyptian tomb.
l didn`t know any
of you wonderful people...
and here l am now.
l`m on the verge
of a madcap Manhattan weekend.
l hope you like
your martinis very dry.
No, thanks.
l`ll wait for that glass
of champagne at the Copacabana.
l`m home, Monk.
What are you
doing home so early?
l thought l said
you can go to the movies.
l did.
l`d better go.
No, don`t, stay.
This is Cecilia.
This is my friend Olga.
Olga`s an acrobat.
l am not!
l have to go home.
Come on. l was gonna
tell you your fortune.
You`re drunk.
What do you mean?
l`m not drunk.
Come on, don`t worry about her.
She`s my ball and chain,
or she tries to be.
Olga, where the hell
are you going?
l want to show you a card trick.
ls there any more
of that meat loaf left?
That stuff you made
yesterday was delicious.
What`s going on?
l`m moving out.
Now, what are you talking about?
What`s wrong?
Because of before?
Because of Olga, is that it?
That`d be funny. Ridiculous.
lf it`s because of Olga...
you`d make a bigger fool
out of yourself than usual.
Pardon me.
She`s Joe Caruso`s sister.
l was just showing her
a card trick.
Your undershirt`s on backwards.
l put it on that way
this morning.
Now listen, Cecilia,
you`re making a mistake.
All right, l`m sorry.
l was drinking.
You know how l get.
Do you think l don`t love you?
Move.
You can`t leave. l need you.
And you know l love you.
Look, l made a mistake.
-You don`t love me.
-Baby, come on.
You treat me bad,
and you beat up on me!
l hit you when
you get out of line.
And l never just hit you.
l always warn you first.
Then if you don`t shape up,
you get whacked.
l`m leaving.
Listen, l don`t know
who`s filling your head...
full of crazy notions,
but l`ve had enough.
l want supper. Get my meat loaf!
Uh-uh.
Come on, Cecilia. You know
l can`t live without you.
l`m like a little kid
when it comes to you.
That`s just tough.
Look, l`m sorry.
Can`t l be sorry?
l drink, l get crazy.
lt`s not me, it`s the whiskey.
l`m going, Monk.
Jesus Christ,
l can`t reason with you.
All right, go ahead.
See how far you get.
Go on. You won`t last.
You see how it is
out in the real world.
Go on, you`ll come back.
You`re just bluff.
You`re all phony.
You`ll be back.
lt may take a week or an hour,
but you`ll be back!
Oh, jeez!
Look at all those guys.
Come on, honey.
We`re gonna make a buck.
l ordered bacon and tomato.
You brought me ham and swiss.
l`ll get it right away, ma`am.
Cecilia, l want you
to meet somebody.
Remember l was gonna keep
my eyes open for eligible men?
Oh, come on.
Just keep an open mind.
This is my sister Cecilia.
Mr. Teddy Ashcroft.
-How do you do?
-Charmed.
Teddy`s an exterminator.
Wright-Merson Pest Control.
My specialty are
mice and silverfish.
l`m pleased to meet you.
-Waitress! My hamburger!
-l`m coming!
-Can we have a check?
-l`ll be right there.
That`s it, Cecilia.
You`re fired. Get out!
But l`ll pay for it.
l`ll be more careful.
Out. Take off your apron.
Go home. You`re fired.
lf she goes, then l go, too.
That`s fine with me.
She doesn`t mean that.
You`ve got kids.
Then tell her
to mind her own business.
You`re fired.
Back from Egypt.
From the Bedouins to Broadway.
Though l`m not
a religious man...
l hereby vow never to fly over
the Atlantic in bumpy weather...
and never to look
at another camel.
Drinks, anyone?
Boy, l can`t wait
to get out of these clothes...
and hit some of the night spots.
Well, children,
let`s not waste any time.
The floor show at the Copacabana
starts in ten minutes...
and we`re meeting
the Countess and Larry Wilde.
Well, l am impressed.
You have yourself
quite a place here.
l still can`t get over the fact
that 24 hours ago...
l was in an Egyptian tomb.
l didn`t know any
of you wonderful people...
and here l am now.
l`m on the verge
of a madcap Manhattan weekend.
l hope you like
your martinis very dry.
No, thanks.
l`ll wait for that glass
of champagne at the Copacabana.
Miss Rita,
something on your mind?
You ain`t been yourself since
you come back from the pyramids.
lt`s nothing. l`ll be OK.
l don`t suspect
it has anything to do...
with that explorer fella,
Mr. Tom Baxter?
Why would you say that?
The way he speaks--
all romantic-like.
Come on, Delilah, draw my bath.
Yes, ma`am.
Will you be wantin` the big
bubbles or the asses` milk?
Boy, l can`t wait
to get out of these clothes...
and hit some of the night spots.
Well, children,
let`s not waste any time.
The floor show at the Copacabana
starts in ten minutes...
and we`re meeting
the Countess and Larry Wilde.
Well, l am very impressed.
You have yourself
quite a place here.
l still can`t get over the fact
that 24 hours ago...
l was in an Egyptian tomb.
l didn`t know any
of you wonderful people...
and here l am now.
l`m on the verge
of a madcap Manhattan weekend.
My God, you must
really love this picture.
Me?
You`ve been here all day, and
l`ve seen you here twice before.
You mean me?
Yes, you. This is the fifth time
you`re seeing this.
Henry, come here. Quickly.
l gotta speak to you.
Oh, my God!
Listen, old sport,
you`re on the wrong side.
Tom, get back here.
We`re in the middle of a story.
l want to have a look around.
Go on without me.
-Who are you?
-Cecilia.
l`ll go get the manager.
Let`s go somewhere
where we can talk.
But you`re in the movie!
Wrong, Cecilia, l`m free.
After 2,000 performances of
the same monotonous routine...
l`m free!
Call Father Donnelly.
l don`t understand.
What`s going on? Who are you?
Who am l? You`ve seen
the movie five times.
l`m Tom Baxter...
poet, adventurer, explorer,
of the Chicago Baxters.
l know you`re Tom Baxter.
You wind up with Kitty Haynes,
the nightclub singer.
-Not anymore l don`t.
-What do you mean?
l`m out before the wedding.
l`m free.
Don`t you have to marry her?
Not while l`m here
and she`s up there.
Don`t you want to?
She`s so beautiful.
She`s not for me. Too bony.
Kitty Haynes
the nightclub singer is bony?
l need a place to hide.
l`m never going back
now that l`ve met you.
A place to hide?
What`s happening?
Tom has left.
He just walked right out.
l don`t know how he did it.
l can`t get out.
This is just disgusting.
l am an heiress...
and l don`t have
to put up with this.
He left the picture?
Oh, my gosh.
Well, don`t panic.
Stay up there and keep calm.
Keep calm? Are you crazy?
Did somebody call for a priest?
Thank God you`re here.
Wait a minute.
This is the second reel.
l`m not on till later.
Can`t you go on?
There`s an audience.
How? Tom was
the linchpin of the story.
She`s right, whoever you are.
Although this is my story,
Tom moves the exposition--
lt`s not your story.
lt`s the story...
of a man`s quest
for self-fulfillment.
lt`s the story of
a complex tortured soul--
lt`s the story of the effect
of money on true romance.
My upbringing, my wealth--
l`m the one who marries royalty.
Nobody cares.
What do you mean
they don`t care?
They wouldn`t sell a ticket
if it were your story.
-Stop arguing.
-And do what?
Maybe you should just
turn the projector off.
Don`t turn the projector off!
lt gets black and we disappear.
Easy, my friend.
We`re all in this together.
You don`t understand
what it`s like to disappear...
to be nothing, annihilated!
Don`t turn the projector off.
Miss Rita, your bath is ready.
-Not now, dear.
-What`s going on?
-What`s he doing here?
-Have a martini.
He`s not supposed
to be here till reel six.
We know that, Delilah.
What the hell is going on?
Somebody trying to hustle me?
l know what this is.
lt`s an amusement park!
lt`s usually pretty dead
around here till summer.
l know exactly what
an amusement park is...
and what goes on, l do!
That`s good.
lt`s written into my character.
Remember, l invite
Kitty to Luna Park...
but she prefers just
to stay home and talk.
So it`s in me!
Too bad nothing`s open.
l`m starved!
You are?
l left the movie
before the Copacabana scenes.
That`s when l usually eat.
Wait! What am l thinking?
Look, here, l`ve got
a whole bag of popcorn.
You can have that.
Also, l have a Milky-Way bar.
-No, popcorn is...
-Might want it later.
Boy! So that`s what
popcorn tastes like!
Been watching people eat it
for all those performances.
When they rattle those bags,
though, that`s annoying.
l still don`t understand
what`s going on.
l wanted to meet you.
Don`t tell me you didn`t
see me looking at you...
out of the corner of my eye...
when Kitty Haynes
is doing her nightclub number.
Wait a minute.
l remember seeing you.
You were looking off
to the side somehow...
but l never thought
it was to me.
And when we take the drive
to that little country inn...
when l propose to Kitty,
l was looking at you.
Kitty looked so beautiful
in that black dress.
She`s nothing compared to you.
What are you talking about?
l`m nothing.
Like hell you are.
You`re fetching.
-Fetching?
-Fetching.
Dad liked to use that word
about Mom back in Chicago.
''Min,'' he`d say,
`'you`re rather fetching.''
Dad was a card. Never met him.
He died before the movie begins.
Well, l have to confess.
My eye did always go to you
up on the screen.
-Really?
-Really.
Even around Detective Simms
and Henry Adams the playboy?
Even though
you`re not the main character...
you`re the one you look at.
You don`t think
l`m the main character?
l didn`t mean it that way.
l think you`re
positively essential.
ln fact, every time
l saw the movie...
l kept thinking,
`'Tom Baxter`s so handsome.''
Shouldn`t you be getting back?
l want to live and be free
to make my own choices.
Right now the country`s
not in such great shape.
What do you mean?
We`re in the middle
of a depression.
Everybody`s very poor.
l got plenty. Look at this!
But they need you. The story
doesn`t work without you.
l`m in love with you.
l`m married.
Happily?
l really should get back home.
l have to cook dinner.
Slip away from
your husband tonight.
Meet me here.
l`ll wait for you.
l want to learn about
the real world with you.
l can`t.
Look at it this way.
How many times is a man
so taken with a woman...
that he walks off
the screen to get her?
Let`s not panic.
We`re all adults.
Bored with sitting around.
l`m a dramatic character.
l need forward motion.
Here comes
the Countess and Larry.
Where is everybody?
Weren`t we meeting
at the Copacabana?
-Tom`s gone.
-What?
He left the film.
-What?
-Tom walked out on us.
But the Copa is where
the two of us meet.
l try to get him to marry me.
Forget it. l`m tired of
marrying you every night.
We never even get
to the bedroom.
-Where did Tom go?
-lnto the real world.
That two-bit minor character
leaves, and we`re stuck!
l wonder what it`s like
out there.
They don`t look like they`re
having too much fun to me.
What the hell
kind of movie is this?
The paper said it was a romance
set all over the world!
Don`t tell us your sad stories.
Do you think we like this?
Look at this. They sit around
and talk, and no action?
Nothing happens?
l want my money back.
This is outrageous.
Why don`t you stop yapping?
We`ve got problems of our own.
You can`t talk
to my wife like that.
Who do you think you are?
l`m a genuine countess
with a lot of dough...
and if that`s your wife,
she`s a tub of guts.
You said it!
What are you so nervous about?
Me? l`m not.
There`s too much pepper
in the sauce.
l told you to go easy
on the pepper.
l guess you and the guys...
are probably going out
again tonight, huh?
No, l`m not.
My back is acting up again.
You gotta give me one of
your special rubdowns.
l bought liniment.
What?
l can`t.
What do you mean, you can`t?
l`m sorry.
l didn`t mean l can`t.
l mean l made some plans.
You made plans?
l said l`d baby-sit tonight.
l ran into Mrs. Lorenzo
in the restaurant--
in the street today.
And she has some, l don`t know--
l think it was
a social club meeting...
or something
she wanted to go to.
lt won`t be too long.
l think it`s a great idea.
Yeah? Good.
Because we can use every penny.
So what am l gonna do
about my back?
Don`t worry.
l can do some now...
and l`ll do some when l come in.
You shouldn`t move around
too much. Just take it easy.
lf you`re gonna go baby-sit,
get paid in cash.
-l will.
-Don`t let her owe you.
lt`s a complete miracle!
We want our money back.
l don`t pay to watch those
socialites sitting around...
up there staring back at us
making nasty remarks.
ls that what they`re doing now?
Last time l looked, the priest
had a deck of cards...
and the men
were playing pinochle.
How`d this first happen?
lt`s probably
all the electrical storms...
we`ve had this season.
The air is charged.
Fellas, l depend on the Jewel.
l got personal expenses.
l got no substitute
picture to put in here.
l want my money back!
This is a swindle!
There`s no story.
Mrs. Lupus likes a story.
l still think you should turn
the projector off and shut down.
This could be the work
of Reds or anarchists.
You can`t do that.
lf he turns off the projector...
you`re liable
to strand this Tom Baxter...
out in the world someplace.
You want an extra guy
running around?
l saw the movie last week.
This is not what happens.
Where is the Tom Baxter
character?
You`ll get your money back.
l want what happened last week
to happen this week.
Otherwise,
what`s life all about anyway?
Can`t we just go in
and take a look?
We don`t want to stay long.
lf you want to see it,
you have to pay admission.
Keep moving, folks.
Any word about Tom Baxter?
Nothing yet.
What are you people doing here?
We can`t continue the story
until Tom gets back.
We don`t mind observing you all.
My husband is a student
of the human personality.
Well, we`re not human.
lt doesn`t matter to Harold.
He has trouble with humans.
Where do l have trouble
with real people?
l suppose you behave
perfectly with Donald.
He won`t speak
to my own son-in-law.
l won`t speak? The kid is quiet.
He never makes conversation.
He has to be drawn out.
l don`t like to draw people out.
That`s what l said.
He has trouble with live humans.
Yes, RKO!
l want to speak
to Mr. Raoul Hirsch.
He`s the producer
of ''The Purple Rose of Cairo.''
No, he`s not.
Just tell him l have
a theater in New Jersey...
and there`s a crisis
with his film.
This is Mr. Hirsch.
What`s the problem?
What?
They`re all sitting around
up there on the screen.
Rita, the Countess,
Larry Wilde, the playboy.
People are demanding
their money back.
The theater
is nine-tenths empty.
Take a walk, will you?
Look, he just walked out!
Baxter.
The Communist is screaming...
the priest in reel five
is in reel two.
How can he come off the screen?
lt`s impossible.
lt`s never happened
before in history.
Just because a thing
never happened before...
doesn`t mean it can`t
happen for first time.
That`s all you need--hundreds
of Tom Baxters on the loose.
Hundreds?
As your lawyer,
l advise you to control it fast.
A character from one of
your productions on the loose?
Who knows what he`s capable of?
Robbery, murder. l see lawsuits.
l`d charter a plane right away,
and l`d get down there fast.
Get me Gil Shepherd.
l`m sorry l`m not
too light on my feet.
You`re a feather in my arms.
Monk never took me dancing,
not even when we first met...
not even if l begged him.
Really?
So it`s been bad for you?
lt`s been hard for everyone.
Living in a world
with no jobs and wars.
You probably never even
heard of the Great War.
Sorry. l missed it.
People get old and sick
and never find true love.
Where l come from,
people don`t disappoint.
They`re consistent.
Always reliable.
You don`t find that kind
in real life.
You have.
ls it true they`re talking to
you about the life of Lindbergh?
lt`s nearly set, but don`t
print it till it`s firm.
You were great
in ''The Purple Rose of Cairo.''
Thanks. Did you know...
l was singled out by all
the East Coast critics?
The New York Times
said l had almost...
too smoldering a quality
just to play comedy.
Would you play Lindbergh
the way you played Tom Baxter?
Of course not.
Tom was kind of a change of pace
from my earlier roles.
l played Tom Baxter
with a kind of a poetic...
idealistic quality that just--
Lindbergh was a loner.
He was self-reliant.
l`d have to work it out
with my dialogue coach.
He`s a genius.
Can l see you for
a minute alone, please?
-Excuse me. l`m sorry.
-What`s up?
Baxter`s come off the screen and
is running around New Jersey.
What are you talking about?
l just spoke to Raoul Hirsch.
Nobody knows how it happened,
but he`s done it.
How could he do that?
lt`s not physically possible.
ln New Jersey,
anything can happen.
But l created the character.
That`s my point!
As your agent...
l`d hate anything for happen
to your career now.
-Like what?
-Who knows?
Your double is on the loose.
What`s he up to?
ls he robbing banks?
Raping broads?
-ls he?
-Who knows?
The last thing we need
is for you to get a rep--
Last thing we need is for you
to get a difficult reputation.
lt`s not my fault!
Raoul Hirsch said if you can`t
control your own creation...
nobody`s gonna risk
a picture on you.
l worked so hard
to make him real.
-Maybe you overdid it.
-l`ll sue my dialogue coach.
You`ve got to fly down there
and check into this quick.
Right now it`s only
one movie house, but who knows?
l`m afraid to fly.
This is the scandal of all time.
You know what happened
to Fatty Arbuckle`s career?
l`ll fly.
Good.
This is how they drink
champagne in Cairo.
l never had champagne before.
lt makes me feel silly.
lt`s supposed to.
The check,
as you requested, sir.
lt`s so much!
l hope you found it
to your liking, sir.
lt was superb.
My compliments to the chef...
and keep 20% for yourself.
No, make that 30%.
Quite amusing.
What is?
The fake money.
Fake money?
ls it play money, sir,
or stage money?
Keep 30% for yourself
and stop looking so serious.
l`ll get the Maitre D`.
That`s not real money!
What do you mean,
it`s not real money?
Oh, my God!
Do you have any money?
No! What are we gonna do?
We`ll have to run for it.
l can`t run.
My ankles are bad
from waitressing.
Get up. Follow me.
Quick, get in the car!
Tom, this is not our car.
We don`t have a car.
We came by foot.
lt doesn`t go.
Of course it doesn`t go.
There`s no key!
l don`t understand.
They always go in the movie.
This is real life.
They don`t start without a key!
They don`t? Let`s go!
Get back here!
You can`t run out on this check!
A couple of deadbeats!
Get back here right now!
l`m sorry about the money.
l had no idea.
That`s OK.
lt`s not gonna be so easy...
to get along without it
in this world.
l guess l have to get a job.
That`s not gonna be
so easy, either.
Right now the whole
country`s out of work.
Then we`ll live on love.
We`ll have to make some
concessions, but so what?
-We`ll have each other.
-That`s movie talk.
You look so beautiful
in this light.
But you`re not real.
Was that real enough for you?
You kiss perfectly.
lt`s what l dreamed
kissing would be like.
Come away with me to Cairo.
Cairo?
We`ll live in the desert.
The blue-gold light of sunset
falling over your hair.
l`m sorry. l`m a little
tipsy from the champ--
Where`s the fade-out?
What?
Always when the kissing
gets hot and heavy...
just before the lovemaking,
there`s a fade-out.
Then what?
Then we`re making love
in some private, perfect place.
That`s not how it happens here.
There`s no fade-out?
No. But when you kissed me,
l felt like my heart faded out.
l closed my eyes,
and l was in some private place.
How fascinating. You make love
without fading out?
l can`t wait to see this.
Listen, l...
l`m not that kind of girl.
l`m married.
lt`s clear how miserable
you are with your husband.
lf he hits you again,
you tell me.
l`d be forced
to knock his teeth out.
l don`t think that`d be
such a good idea. He`s big.
l`m sorry.
lt`s written into my character,
so l`d do it.
Listen. l think
l`d better go home now.
lt`s late.
lt`s been a whirlwind of a day.
What are you going to do?
l`ll sleep here at the carousel,
then walk around...
drink in the night air...
enjoy my freedom...
and dream of you.
You got in late last night.
You were out like a light.
l took a hot bath to relax me.
You want to get me
a cup of coffee?
Sure.
There was some big deal
going on at the movie house.
A big crowd when l went
to buy cigarettes.
l couldn`t get
the story straight.
Some guy ran out the side exit
with a customer.
Who?
A woman, a guy--an actor.
l don`t know what the hell
the cop was talking about.
He didn`t know.
They didn`t know
who the woman was?
Some woman dragged out
in the dark.
They got those real
Geronimos at movie houses.
That`s why l don`t like you
staying out so late.
l know. l couldn`t help it.
The Lorenzos didn`t get back
till late. l couldn`t leave.
l hope you got paid overtime.
Sure.
Good. Let`s have it.
They didn`t have any cash.
l`ll have to come back
for it later today.
l told you to get paid in cash.
l know, but all
they had was big bills.
l was getting late.
They`re gonna fork it over
today, right?
They will.
Leave something to you...
you can bet
you`re gonna get fouled up.
You have no idea where he went?
Mr. Hirsch,
this is awful for us.
lt`s really difficult.
Think of me,
my reputation, my career.
First thing is,
we got to keep it contained.
The word`s out already.
We got to keep the crisis local.
l know the two reporters
in town.
They`re old friends.
Maybe l could talk--
A couple bucks spread around
town will buy us some time.
Don`t worry about a thing.
l mean, we`re all so lost.
l know it`s rough.
l just want the whole cast
to know...
how much l appreciate your
staying up there on the screen.
l hope you`re not gonna
hold this against me, R.H.
You created the part
of Tom Baxter, Gil.
The facts are undeniable.
l want to go, too.
l want to be free! l want out!
l`m warning you,
that`s Communist talk.
We`re gonna have to pull
the film out of the theatre...
and you`re gonna have
to make good my receipts.
You`re thinking
of pulling the film...
because a minor
character`s missing?
A minor character?
Would you listen to her?
He may not have the most lines,
but the plot turns on Baxter.
l deliberately played him
with a cheerful bravado.
Who cares how you played him?
-He`s minor.
-That`s right.
l`d like to get
my hands on him !
Right when my career
was taking off.
He could be raping
that woman he abducted.
And he`s got my fingerprints.
My exact prints!
You know what they get
for rape in a small town?
Especially by a man
in a pith helmet?
lf this is the start
of a new trend...
our industry`s as good as dead.
The real ones want
their lives fiction...
and the fictional ones
want their lives real.
Does anybody know
who that woman was?
lt was all so crazy,
nobody noticed.
Two doughnuts and a container
of coffee to go, please.
Right now, it`s chaos.
How can rumors be circulating
at the Brown Derby?
lt just happened.
Squash it, Herbie!
l`ve got a career on the line.
Look, l`ll call you
the minute l hear.
Excuse me.
What are you doing here?
l`m sorry,
l don`t have a pencil...
or l`d give you an autograph.
Where did you get those clothes?
Pardon me?
Your clothes.
Where`d you get them?
A little store
on Sunset and Vine.
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
Excuse me.
l just bought you these.
Two doughnuts.
For me?
Well, thank you very much.
l hope you
enjoy my next movie.
l thought you were gonna
stay hidden at the park.
What park?
What`s the matter with you?
You`re acting so peculiar.
Tom? No, l`m--
Wait a minute! Come here.
What`s come over you?
l`m not Tom.
l`m Gil Shepherd. l play Tom.
How do you know Tom?
You`re Gil--
Oh, my God!
l don`t believe it!
l`ve seen you in lots of movies.
Where`s Tom?
`'Broadway Bachelors,'' right?
Yeah.
`'Honeymoon in Haiti''?
l`ve done about six.
-You were you a scream.
-Thank you very much.
l try to do one a year,
you know.
Just to keep--Where`s Tom?
Why?
He`s my character.
l created him.
Didn`t the man who wrote
the movie do that?
Yes, technically,
but l made him live.
l fleshed him out.
You did a wonderful job.
He`s adorable.
Thank you very much.
What`s your name?
-Where is he?
-Why?
Has he done anything wrong?
Like what?
Has he stolen anything
or attacked any females? You?
Gosh, no.
He`s as sweet as can be.
l played him sweet.
l was well-reviewed.
lt comes across.
Good. l gotta speak to him.
You`re not upset with him?
A little, yes,
but l know if l spoke to him...
we could straighten
everything out.
l don`t know.
Please, l have a right.
lt has to be secret.
He doesn`t want
to go back into the movie.
-He doesn`t?
-No. He loves being free.
He`s having
the time of his life.
Would you take me to him?
Trust me.
Please.
Monk, somebody saw
your wife last night...
at the Dine and Dance joint.
Sure. She`s there every night
with the Rockefellers.
She was with this
crazy-looking guy...
wearing an explorer`s hat
and breeches.
Breeches? You`re nuts.
She was baby-sitting.
Right. l guess you know it all.
All right, who`s next?
Cecilia, l dreamed
of us in Cairo--
-l brought--
-Gil Shepherd.
-l play you in the movie.
-You do?
How dare you run away!
This is disconcerting.
l`ll show you the meaning
of disconcerting!
l`m trying to build a career!
l don`t want to be
in the film anymore.
l`m in love with Cecilia!
Mr. Shepherd,
you said you weren`t angry.
You can`t do this to me.
lt`s my best role.
l`ve been critically
acclaimed for this!
Because of the way l do it.
No, because of the way l do it.
l`m doing it, not you.
lt`s me, not him !
Then how do you
explain that here l am?
l took you from the printed
page and made you live.
-So l`m living.
-For the screen only!
l want my freedom.
l don`t want another one of me
running around the world.
l can just imagine what he`s--
Are you afraid
l`ll embarrass you?
Frankly, l`m afraid--
But you created me.
Look, be reasonable here.
l`m starting to build a career.
ls life up on the screen
so terrible?
l want to be with Cecilia.
l`m in love with her.
Would you tell him to go back?
Tell him you don`t love him.
Tell him you can`t love him.
He`s fictional.
Do you want to waste your time
with a fictional character?
You`re a sweet girl.
You deserve an actual human.
But Tom`s perfect.
But he`s not real.
What good is perfect
if the man`s not real?
l can learn to be real.
lt`s easy.
There`s nothing to it.
Being real comes
very naturally to me.
You can`t learn to be real.
lt`s like being a midget.
lt`s not a thing you can learn.
Some of us are real,
some are not.
l say l can do it.
l`m not staying here
to argue with you.
l`m going back to town...
and call my attorney,
the actors` union.
l won`t take this lying down,
nor will Raoul Hirsch.
Nor the police, nor the FBl.
We found him.
Gil Shepherd found him...
but he refuses to get
back on the screen.
R.H. is very upset.
We can`t force him.
lt`s not a crime.
We need a plan.
The press is on our side.
lt took a few bucks, but
they`ll keep it quiet for now.
What? Really?
The Tom Baxter character
in a movie house in Chicago...
has been forgetting his lines.
He just got a call
from the manager.
lf anybody wants me,
l`ll be in the bathroom...
on the floor...weeping.
Aren`t you at all even worried?
What about Raoul Hirsch
or the FBl?
lf l can be with you,
l`m never going back.
-But, you know--
-No more buts.
l said l`d learn about
the real world. Show me.
lt`s beautiful.
l`m not sure exactly what it is.
This is a church.
You do believe in God,
don`t you?
Meaning...
The reason for everything,
the world, the universe.
l think l know what you mean.
The two men who wrote
`'The Purple Rose of Cairo''--
lrving Sachs and R.H. Levine.
They`re writers
who collaborate on films.
l`m talking about something
much bigger than that.
Think for a minute.
A reason for everything.
Otherwise, it`d be like
a movie with no point...
and no happy ending.
So there you are.
l`m looking for you.
This is my husband.
This is Tom Baxter.
Adventurer, explorer,
of the Chicago Baxters.
l`m charmed to meet you.
So you wear the britches.
What do you want
to talk to me about?
l heard you were out
on the town last night.
l admit l didn`t
tell the truth about that...
but things have been
so strange the last 24 hours.
l told you what l`d do
if you ever lied to me!
Obviously, your marriage
has come to an impasse, sir.
Let`s just talk.
You`re coming home with me!
Perhaps you don`t
understand, sir...
but l`m in love with your wife.
Close your yap, jackass.
Now let`s go.
You`re failing
to understand, sir.
-She`s not coming with you.
-She`s not?
Take your hands off her.
No man will hit the woman
l love, nor any woman--
Beat it!
Before l take you apart!
He`s got a terrible temper!
lt`s written into
my character--courage.
Stop it!
Come on.
Stop it! What are you doing?
Time for the old one-two.
l think he`s had enough.
Sorry, pal,
about the rough stuff.
You all right?
Let me give you a hand.
There was--
That`s not fair.
What are you doing?
You`re coming home with me now.
-No, l`m not.
-What`d you say?
l`m going to stay
and see that Tom`s OK.
-You`re a bully.
-l gave you an order.
l don`t care.
l`m tired of taking your orders.
You could have killed him.
All right. l`m sorry.
l didn`t mean it.
You can`t go through life
beating people up.
l`m telling you one more time.
You coming with me?
No, l`m not.
l`m telling you one more time.
You coming?
-Come on!
-No, l`m not!
The hell with it.
l need a beer anyway.
l`ll see you later.
Are you OK?
l`m fine.
You`re not even marked.
Your hair`s in place.
l don`t get hurt or bleed.
Hair doesn`t muss.
lt`s one of the advantages
of being imaginary.
You were very brave.
l had him, too,
till he started fighting dirty.
That`s why you`ll never
survive off the screen.
You were pretty brave, too.
You stood up to him.
You inspired me.
Mr. Shepherd.
Cecilia, look,
l gotta speak to you.
l`ve had a crazy morning.
l`m still shaking.
l don`t know what to do.
l`ve struggled my whole life.
Now l`m finally beginning
to break through...
and my whole career
is going right down the drain.
You don`t have to
worry about that.
You`ll always be
a great movie star.
That`s very nice of you,
but technically...
l`m not really a star yet.
l try to carry myself like one.
l do the best l can as
far as that, but star?
That`s a big word, isn`t it?
Star. Yeah.
Star? No.
You`re not just a pretty face.
You`re also a peach of an actor.
Really, l`ve seen you a lot.
You`ve got something.
ls that your opinion?
Sure. l see all the movies.
You`ve got--
How can l describe it?
You`ve got a magical glow.
Oh, boy!
To hear that from a real person.
That is just--
lt`s not one of those
movie colony bimbos...
with the fancy dresses,
filling you full of hot air.
Would you get over here
and sit down, please?
You can take it from me.
You`re not just
a flash in the pan.
lt would be very easy for me...
to trade on my looks
just like that...
but l have some serious
acting ambitions.
You should.
l think you`re great
in all the funny movies.
Thank you.
Really, l was thinking
you should play...
some of the more heroic parts.
l want to. l tell my agent
that a hundred times!
You could play, like,
Daniel Boone or someone--
Lindbergh.
You`d be wonderful as Lindbergh.
-You are a mind reader.
-You had the same thought?
l`m on the verge
of signing for that part.
-l am ! l can taste it.
-Really?
You`ll be wonderful!
There`s something inside you.
You have that same kind
of lone heroic quality.
You`re exactly right.
Everyone has been telling me
not to--you are right.
Don`t you listen.
Basically, l have been
a loner my entire life.
Sure, anyone can see that.
You`re deep
and probably complicated.
-Can l buy you lunch?
-Me?
Please. Can l?
l love talking to you.
l was going upstairs--
Come on.
l open myself up around you.
Have you ever been to Hollywood?
Come on. Of course not.
l would love to just
take you around Hollywood.
-Can l make a confession?
-Sure.
My real name
is not Gil Shepherd.
lt`s Herman Bardebedian.
Really?
Yeah. l`ve been a cab driver--
Boy, do you have a pretty face.
-Come on.
-You do!
Hi, big boy.
Are you alone?
Hello.
l`m alone for now...
but later l have
an appointment--
or should l say, rendezvous.
Good for you.
Where`d you get the funny suit?
What, this?
You coming from a costume party?
No. l`m Tom Baxter
of the Chicago Baxters--
explorer, poet, adventurer.
Just back from Cairo,
where l searched in vain...
for the legendary Purple Rose.
How about that?
Who are you?
My name`s Emma.
That`s lovely.
What do you do?
l`m a working girl.
And what do you do,
you delicate creature?
Anything that`ll make a buck.
We Baxters never really
had to worry about money.
l`ll bet. You want
to come along with me?
Where to, Emma?
Where l work. l think
you might have a good time.
Sounds enchanting.
l`m up for new experiences.
l may be able to help.
Hi, girls. This is Tom.
Hi there, ladies.
Don`t you all look enticing?
l know what you want.
You want to be
the great white hunter...
and you want me to be the tiger.
l don`t get it.
You will if you can afford it.
l met Tom out
at the amusement park.
That`s my hat.
l was thinking about something.
l can imagine.
Two of us at the same time?
l was thinking about
very deep things--
God and his relation with
lrving Sachs and R.H. Levine.
And l was thinking
about life in general--
the origin of everything
we see about us...
the finality of death...
and how almost magical
it seems in the real world...
as opposed to the world
of celluloid...
and flickering shadows.
Where did you find this clown?
For example,
the miracle of birth.
Now, l suppose some of you
lovely ladies are married.
Not anymore.
The absolutely astonishing
miracle of childbirth...
with all its attendant feelings
of humanity and pathos.
l stand in awe of existence.
Do you want to tie me up?
Tie you up?
That`s very funny.
She`s very funny.
Nice sense of humor--
the absurd non sequitur.
-What`s your name, sweetheart?
-Martha.
That`s the same name as
the ambassador`s wife.
Why didn`t you
bring the ambassador by?
He`s still up on the screen.
But do you share
my sense of wonderment...
at the very fabric of being?
The smell of a rose,
real food, sensuous music?
l`ve got a child.
You do? l see.
You`re a widow. Poor thing.
l got two kids, and he`s
right about giving birth.
lt is a beautiful experience.
l never had a baby.
l was pregnant, but l lost it.
l`m sorry to hear that.
lt always makes me cry
to think about it.
There, there.
You`ll have another chance.
Come on.
l`d be surprised...
if all you ladies
weren`t married soon...
especially by the way you dress.
lt`s so seductive to a man.
You like these stockings, Tom?
They`re just divine.
What kind of a club
is this, anyhow?
God, you`re a scream.
He`s terribly sweet.
He is. l wouldn`t mind
doing him for nothing.
Me, neither. Plus, he`s cute.
You can count me in. Come on.
We`re gonna take you
into the bedroom...
and give you an experience
you`ll never forget.
And it`s on us.
l came here
for a new experience.
You`re gonna get
a champion roll in the hay.
What, there`s hay
in the bedroom?
You ever been
to a brothel before?
What`s a brothel?
You must be kidding.
A brothel--
a bordello, a whorehouse.
l`m not following. What?
We go to bed with you
and make love, and you pay us.
Only, because you`re so sweet,
we want to treat you to a party.
Really?
Boy, this doesn`t ring a bell
with anything l know.
Come on, buddy.
You know about making love,
don`t you?
l can`t make love with you.
Don`t tell me
you don`t like women.
Or you were wounded in the war.
No, l`m in love
with someone else.
We`re not talking about in love.
We`re talking about making love.
But l love Cecilia.
So what? Marry Cecilia.
This is just for fun.
l couldn`t do that.
Ladies! My gracious!
Don`t think l`m not
appreciative of your offer...
though l must say the concept
is totally new to me...
but l`m just hopelessly
head-over-heels in love...
with Cecilia.
She is all l want.
My devotion is to her,
my loyalties.
Every breath she takes
makes my heart dance.
This guy just kills me.
Are there any other guys
like you out there?
Lawson`s Music Store.
This store`s been here
since l was a kid.
l wish l could play
an instrument.
That`s my other
ambition in life...
is to be a great
classical violinist...
thousands cheering me
night after night.
-l can play the ukulele.
-You can?
My father taught me
before he ran away.
l`m Alabamy bound
There`ll be no heebie-jeebies
hangin` round
Just gave the meanest
ticket man on earth
All l`m worth
To put my tootsies
in an upper berth
Just hear that choo-choo sound
Whoo whoo!
l know that soon
we`re gonna cover ground
And then l`ll holler
`cause the world will know
Here l go
l`m Alabamy bound
Whoa!
l`m Alabamy bound
-That was wonderful!
-Thanks.
That`s like a dream.
Listen.
My baby loves me
l don`t know nobody
As happy as we
She`s only 20
And l`m 21
We never worry
We`re just havin` fun
Bum bum bum
Sometimes we quarrel
And maybe we fight
But then we make up
The following night
When we`re together
We`re great company
l love my baby
And my baby loves me
That was wonderful!
After the Lindbergh movie,
you should do a musical.
l did have one bit in one once.
l saw ''Dancing Doughboys.''
`'Dancing Doughboys''!
You remembered!
That was great.
You turned
to lna Beasley and said...
`'l won`t be going south
with you this winter.''
That`s exac--Right.
`'l won`t be going south
with you this winter.
`'We have a little
score to settle...
`'on the other side
of the Atlantic.''
''Does this mean l won`t
be seeing you ever again?''
`'Ever is a long time.''
`'When you leave,
don`t look back.''
You remember it perfectly.
Then l took her in
my arms and l kissed her...
knowing it was
for the last time.
God, you`re beautiful.
Was it fun kissing lna Beasley?
lt was a movie kiss.
We professionals can put
that stuff on just like that.
lt looked like you loved her.
Oh, my goodness.
Feel my heart.
l bet--l should--
Thank you so much
for the ukulele.
Don`t be offended.
l didn`t mean--
l`m not offended.
l`m just confused.
l`m married.
l just met a wonderful new man.
He`s fictional,
but you can`t have everything.
Can l see you later?
No. l`m meeting Tom.
My own creation plagues me.
-Anything happening out there?
-Not a thing.
Life is amazing, isn`t it?
One little minor character,
takes some action...
and the whole world
is turned upside-down.
What if he never comes back?
We just drift till
they shut the projector.
Will you shut up? Stop that.
He`ll be back. l feel it.
l don`t want
to sit around and wait.
That`s exactly what they want.
-Who?
-The bosses.
Look at us! Sitting around,
slaves to some stupid scenario.
Meanwhile,
the fat cats in Hollywood...
are getting rich on our work--
studio heads,
writers, movie stars.
Stop it!
But we`re the ones who sweat!
We`re the characters
on the screen, not them !
You`re a Red.
l say unite, brothers,
and take action!
-What possible action?
-Shut up and sit down!
Wait a minute!
Shut up, will you?
What if all this is merely
a matter of semantics?
How can it be semantics?
Wait a minute.
Let`s just readjust
our definitions.
Let`s redefine ourselves
as the real world...
and them as the world of
illusion and shadow. You see?
We`re reality, they`re a dream.
You`d better calm down.
You`ve been up on the screen
flickering too long.
lt`s confirmed.
lt is?
l was afraid this might happen.
The Tom Baxter character...
tried leaving the screen
in four theaters--
St. Louis, Chicago,
Denver, and Detroit...
and he almost made it
in Detroit.
lt looks bad.
Those movie houses are
in a state of pandemonium.
There`s no way
to keep the lid on it.
l see hundreds of lawsuits.
We better pull
the picture out of release.
What, in those towns?
Everywhere.
Something`s obviously
gone very wrong here...
and the best course of
action is to shut down...
take our losses,
and get out of this mess...
before it really
gets out of hand.
Can you imagine hundreds of
Tom Baxters flying around wild?
And you responsible
for every one of them.
The best thing to do is
to quit while there`s...
only of them out there,
but what do we do about him?
We gotta get him back
in the picture...
then we turn off the projector
and burn the prints.
And the negative.
What a shame.
lt was such a good picture.
l missed you. You`re late.
l`m sorry. l came
as quickly as l could.
l love you.
Thank you.
My feelings are so jumbled.
l know. You`re married,
and you`re old-fashioned...
and l`m a whole new idea.
But the truth is,
you`re unhappily married...
and l`m gonna take you
away from all this.
l know you love me.
l do love you.
Don`t you share my feelings?
That`s just it.
You`re some kind of phantom.
Look, l don`t want
to talk anymore...
about what`s real
and what`s illusion.
Life`s too short to spend time
thinking about life.
-Let`s just live it.
-Live it how?
We`ll begin with dinner.
Listen, no.
l`ve only got a few dollars.
We`re not gonna use your money.
That`s all we have,
unless you`ve done something.
Say no more.
The moon will be full,
the stars will be out.
We`re going stepping.
-But we`re broke.
-Leave that to me.
lt`s him !
You`re back!
l want you to meet
my fiancee Cecilia.
Well, you know
all these people.
lt`s not possible.
l`m in the world
of the possible.
You better get back in
the story, you little weasel.
You anticipate me.
Follow me. Trust me.
He just comes
and goes like he pleases.
-Come on.
-Where am l?
-She can`t be in here.
-Why not? Come on.
My money`s good up here.
l feel like l`m floating on air.
lt upsets the balance!
What`s the difference?
He`s back, isn`t he?
l told you he`d be back.
Can we get on with the plot now?
How can we with her here?
She`s here with me.
l`ll sock any man in the jaw
who makes her feel unwanted.
lt`s about time you got back.
All right. Now we finally
go to the Copacabana.
None of us have eaten in ages.
Good. l`m bringing a guest.
Won`t Kitty Haynes be surprised.
Table for seven, please, Arturo.
Yes, sir. Seven?
Seven.
That`s impossible.
lt`s always six.
We have an extra.
Seven, Arturo.
This person?
So let`s not speak
of love sublime
Because time
brings on a breakup
There`ll be no tears
and no emotional scenes
To spoil my make-up
And when the end comes,
l`ll take up the slack...
Would you like
some more champagne?
Thank you.
Listen, l don`t know
what they`re charging you...
but those champagne bottles
are filled with ginger ale.
That`s the movies, kid.
l don`t care.
l love every minute of it.
...Domesticating
Every Sunday, Monday
One day at a time
Let`s take it
one day at a time
Let`s take it
one day at a time
Bravo!
Bravo!
Thank you.
Who are you?
l came with Tom.
You sing so beautifully.
What the hell is this?
We`re supposed to meet
and marry.
-Who`s the skirt?
-My fiancee.
He met her in New Jersey.
-What is this?
-Kitty, she`s real.
Quick!
Pour ginger ale over her.
What`s all the fuss about?
Nothing, Arturo.
We were just leaving.
Leaving where?
l`m all mixed up.
l`m going to show
Cecilia the town.
Are we chucking out the plot?
Exactly.
Every man for himself.
Then l don`t have
to seat people anymore.
l can do what it is
l`ve always wanted to do!
What`s that?
Hit it, boys!
l had such a wonderful time.
Me, too.
Where are all the others?
l don`t know. Probably
just still dancing away.
Why, does it matter?
l wanted to get you alone.
lt`s so beautiful here.
The white telephone.
l`ve dreamed of having
a white telephone.
Your dreams are my dreams.
My whole life, l`ve wondered
what it would be like...
to be this side
of the screen.
You see that city
out there waking up?
That`s yours for the asking.
My heart`s beating so fast.
Gil, what are you doing here?
l came in here to think.
What are you doing here?
l took her on a date.
All right?
Can`t you
just leave us alone?
l can`t leave her alone.
l`m jealous.
You`re jealous?
What do you want me to say?
l can`t get Cecilia
out of my mind.
Gil, do you mean that?
For God`s sake, would you
go back to Hollywood, please?
l`m embarrassed to admit it.
You said l had a magical glow,
but it`s you.
You`re the one that has one.
And even though
we`ve just met...
l know that this
is the real thing.
You can`t be in love
with Cecilia.
She`s in love with me!
Why don`t you turn around
and re-enter the film?
l`m never going back!
l can`t believe it.
They`re at it again.
Will you get back up here?
See, there you go.
You`re ruining everything.
You`re the one
who`s ruining everything.
lf it wasn`t for me,
there wouldn`t be any you.
Don`t be so sure.
l could have been played...
by Frederick March
or Leslie Howard.
You`re wrong.
The part`s too insignificant...
to attract a major star.
lnsignificant?
Like hell it is!
What are you talking about?
l`m not a minor character.
Jeez. You know,
l haven`t been able...
to think of anything
since we`ve met.
l have to have
some time with you...
to show you what
real life can be like...
if two people really
care for each other.
Last week, l was unloved.
Now two people love me,
and it`s the same two people.
Go with the real guy, honey.
We`re limited.
Go with Tom. He`s got no flaws.
Go with somebody, child!
`Cause l`s gettin` bored.
She`s going to marry me.
You`re wasting your time.
Will you get back on the screen?
l`m trying to tell Cecilia
l`m in love with her.
l love you.
l`m honest, dependable,
courageous, romantic...
and a great kisser.
And l`m real.
Let`s go, Cecilia.
Choose one of them
so we can settle this thing.
The most human of all attributes
is your ability to choose.
Wait a minute.
lf she chooses Tom...
how are we gonna end the story?
We`ll be stuck here forever.
Father Donnelly can marry us
right here in the movie house.
That won`t stand up in court.
The priest has to be human.
The Bible never says
a priest can`t be on film.
l`m already married.
Come away with me to Hollywood.
Just like that?
Do something impulsive
for once in your life.
Just throw your stuff in
a valise and come away with me.
Really. And don`t forget
that ukulele.
What ukulele?
Look, l love you.
l know that only happens
in movies, but l do.
Cecilia, you`re
throwing away perfection!
Don`t tell her that.
We need Tom back!
-lt`s so romantic!
-Women!
l`m crushed. Devastated.
Try to understand.
You`ll be fine. ln your world...
things have a way
of always working out right.
l`m a real person.
No matter how tempted l am,
l have to choose the real world.
l loved every minute with you.
l`ll never forget
our night on the town.
Good-bye.
You`re better off
with us, old sport.
You really are.
Can we get on with
`'The Purple Rose of Cairo''?
Anyone wants me,
l`ll be in reel six.
Kitty`s waiting for you.
Lord, have mercy!
What a day!
Your explorer friend`s OK.
l saw him walking
around town with you.
He`s OK, no thanks to you.
l didn`t mean
to be so rough on him.
lt`s just that l get jealous
when it comes to you.
Do you?
Christ, you know l do.
l know l treat you rough.
lt`s my way.
lt doesn`t mean
l don`t feel for you.
What are you doing?
Leaving.
Here we go again.
You don`t feel for me.
All you feel for is yourself...
your beer, your card games,
your women.
OK. l`m gonna
turn over a new leaf.
lt`s too late. l`m going.
l should have
left a long time ago.
l would`ve, except l was
scared of being alone.
So, what now?
You found some chump...
who`s filling your head
with big ideas.
No. l got a chance
to change my life.
l`m moving to Hollywood.
Now, listen,
l said l was sorry...
about being rough with your
friend, but let`s shape up.
lt`s too late!
Like hell it is...
and don`t be giving me
that big-headed stuff, you hear?
Because l`m the guy
that can slap you down.
Go ahead and hit me.
Just go ahead!
l`m leaving anyway!
This never would`ve happened
if you didn`t meet that guy.
That`s probably right...
and we would have
gone on the same way...
`til we were too old
to hope for something better.
But l did meet him.
And l have feelings for him.
And he has for me.
What about me?
l still care for you,
if you can believe that...
but out of the blue
for the first time in my life...
somebody`s in love with me.
But you just met each other.
Love at first sight doesn`t
only happen just in the movies.
Don`t go. You hear me?
Now wait a minute.
l said don`t go!
-You stay here!
-Take care of yourself.
All right. Well, go.
See if l care.
Go, see what it is out there.
lt ain`t the movies!
lt`s real life,
and you`ll be back.
Mark my words. You`ll be back!
What are you doing here?
-Meeting Gil Shepherd.
-They`re all gone.
What do you mean?
They went back to Hollywood.
Gil, too?
Mr. Shepherd, yeah.
Soon as Tom Baxter went back up
on the movie screen...
couldn`t wait
to get out of here.
He said this was
a close call for his career.
l think he`s going to play
Charles Lindbergh.
Don`t forget, Cecilia.
Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers
start today.
Heaven
l`m in heaven
And my heart beats so
that l can hardly speak
And l seem to find
the happiness l seek
When we`re out together
dancing cheek to cheek
Heaven
l`m in heaven
And the cares that hung
around me through the week
Seem to vanish
like a gambler`s lucky streak
When we`re out together
dancing cheek to cheek
Oh, l love to climb a mountain
And to reach the highest peak
But it doesn`t thrill me
half as much
As dancing cheek to cheek
Are you all right?
You`re gonna like this one.
lt`s better than last week`s.
lt`s more romantic.
Miss, l wanted oatmeal
before my scrambled eggs.
Sorry. l`ll get it right away.
l get cereal, too.
And a doughnut.
Cereal and a doughnut. Right.
Listen, there`s a new movie
at the Jewel starting tonight.
l didn`t even get
to see last week`s.
You missed it? lt was wonderful.
l love Jane Froman.
And James Melton
plays a hotel porter...
and then he becomes
a radio singer...
and then an opera singer.
The music was just beautiful.
The one that l liked
is ''Okay, America.''
l saw that twice.
That was great.
When she threatens
to kill Lew Ayres--
l love Lew Ayres` looks.
Do you think he`s married?
Are you crazy?
He`s married to Ginger Rogers.
They got married on a boat
off the island of Catalina.
They live in Beverly Hills
and Hollywood and Spain.
He used to be married
to Lola Lane...
but Ginger`s better for him.
Where`s my toast?
Coming right up. One second.
Ginger used to be
married to Jack--
Let`s go, girls.
Let`s go, Cecilia.
Your sister is slow.
But she`s still learning.
Ladies, there`s a depression on.
A lot of other people
would like this job...
if you can`t handle it.
No, l can handle it.
lt`s OK.
Ginger used to be married
to Jack Culpepper...
who l think took out
Ruth Chatterton before--
That`s the second one this week.
l`m sorry. l`ll pick it all up.
Come on, Cecilia. Shape up.
Hey, Monk, here comes your wife.
Boy, am l glad to see you.
You got any dough?
Tips weren`t
so good today.
Come on, give me something.
l`m busted.
l hear there`s some jobs opening
up over at the ice factory.
No, there`s nothing.
l was there.
Harriet Rufus says
all you guys do all day...
is just pitch pennies...
and make passes at
the girls who walk by.
Harriet Rufus is a douche bag.
Listen, l gotta save the rest
for groceries and stuff.
All right. Got it?
What are you doing here?
You want to go
to the movies tonight?
There`s an early show.
-l can`t.
-How come?
The guys are
coming over tonight.
-Again?
-You don`t like it?
Well, all you do
is drink and play dice...
and l wind up getting smacked.
l gotta get even, don`t l?
l owe everybody in town.
You`re never home anymore
except to play dice and cards.
Meanwhile, l gotta
take in extra laundry...
after work to pay the rent.
What do you want?
Did l close the factory?
You didn`t use
to be like this, Monk.
l got a lot on my mind.
You think l like
scratching around for work...
living like a bum
the last two years?
l don`t know how much longer
l can go on like this.
Listen, the country`ll
get back working again.
Things are bound to get better.
l promise. l`m crazy about you.
You never pay
any attention to me anymore.
Plus, l thought if we could
go to the movies tonight...
you could forget
your troubles a little.
You like sitting
through that junk, OK?
l`m going to shoot crap.
Go to the movie by yourself.
You make passes at
the girls who go by?
You`re not my boss.
And don`t give me that look.
You`d think l was a criminal.
Come on. Give us a hug.
Just one. Come on. All right?
And don`t come home late.
l worry.
All right? See you later?
Let`s go!
Two, please.
Two.
Just one tonight, please, Doris.
Thank you.
-Evening, Mr. Ruskin.
-Nice to see you.
Popcorn, please.
Jason, l`m bored.
l`m bored with cocktail parties
and opening nights...
and evenings at the opera
and weekends at the races.
A few days in Paris
might be just the thing...
to get the creative juices
flowing again.
l can have George cable
the Ritz for the usual suite.
l`m not talking about Paris.
l`m talking about someplace
completely different...
like Morocco or Egypt.
A boat trip down the Nile
sounds so romantic.
l`ve got just the dress
to wear to the pyramids.
We can leave next week,
spend a couple of weeks there.
Maybe stop in Casablanca
or Tangiers...
as long as
we`re hopping around...
and still be back in time
for the opening of my new play.
To Cairo and Morocco
and Tangiers.
To all the exotic and romantic
places in the world.
There`s another room in here.
lsn`t it divine?
Everything`s
so perfectly preserved.
lt`s quite lovely.
l just don`t want to feel
a bandaged hand at my throat.
Hi there. Who are you?
We`re sightseeing.
We thought we were alone.
You gave me quite a start!
l`m awfully sorry.
Tom Baxter--
explorer, adventurer.
l`m doing a little
archaeological work.
A real-life explorer!
l`ve come in search of
the Purple Rose of Cairo.
lt`s an old legend
that`s fascinated me for years.
A pharaoh had a rose
painted purple for his queen.
And now, the story says, purple
roses grow wild at her tomb.
How romantic.
And you?
We`re going back
to New York tomorrow.
lt`s been
a refreshing two weeks.
We should bring him back to
New York to meet the Countess.
She loves anything
in a pith helmet.
Right!
l will say it`s tempting.
Then it`s settled.
You can explain to us...
what we`ve been looking at
for the last two weeks...
and we can take you
nightclubbing.
lt`s so impulsive, but...
l`ll come!
Why not?
What`s life without
a little risk-taking?
Who knows?
A fortuneteller predicted
l`d fall in love in New York.
Table for six, please, Arturo.
Six, sir.
Now, ladies and gentlemen...
the Copacabana
is proud to present...
Miss Kitty Haynes.
Ours could be a different sort
of love affair
Those busybodies
couldn`t help but stare...
l think our poetic
little archaeologist...
is about to make a discovery.
Ain`t life swell?
Open the champagne.
l feel like getting
plushed to the scuppers.
Let`s take it
one day at a time
And who cares
just how it turns out?
Check, please.
Miss, could l have
the check, please?
Come on, the man
wants his check!
Sorry. Here you go.
So what were you thinking about?
A penthouse, the desert,
and kissing on a dance floor.
So you did go to the movies
last night after all.
The people were so beautiful.
They spoke so cleverly
and do such romantic things.
The guy playing Tom Baxter
was so cute!
Do you want to go
to the movies after work?
l would love to see it again.
What is this, a social club?
l got a sink full of dishes.
Come on, girls!
Thanks a lot.
Well, l am impressed.
You have yourself
quite a place here.
l still can`t get over the fact
that 24 hours ago...
l was in an Egyptian tomb.
l didn`t know any
of you wonderful people...
and here l am now.
l`m on the verge
of a madcap Manhattan weekend.
l hope you like
your martinis very dry.
No, thanks.
l`ll wait for that glass
of champagne at the Copacabana.
l`m home, Monk.
What are you
doing home so early?
l thought l said
you can go to the movies.
l did.
l`d better go.
No, don`t, stay.
This is Cecilia.
This is my friend Olga.
Olga`s an acrobat.
l am not!
l have to go home.
Come on. l was gonna
tell you your fortune.
You`re drunk.
What do you mean?
l`m not drunk.
Come on, don`t worry about her.
She`s my ball and chain,
or she tries to be.
Olga, where the hell
are you going?
l want to show you a card trick.
ls there any more
of that meat loaf left?
That stuff you made
yesterday was delicious.
What`s going on?
l`m moving out.
Now, what are you talking about?
What`s wrong?
Because of before?
Because of Olga, is that it?
That`d be funny. Ridiculous.
lf it`s because of Olga...
you`d make a bigger fool
out of yourself than usual.
Pardon me.
She`s Joe Caruso`s sister.
l was just showing her
a card trick.
Your undershirt`s on backwards.
l put it on that way
this morning.
Now listen, Cecilia,
you`re making a mistake.
All right, l`m sorry.
l was drinking.
You know how l get.
Do you think l don`t love you?
Move.
You can`t leave. l need you.
And you know l love you.
Look, l made a mistake.
-You don`t love me.
-Baby, come on.
You treat me bad,
and you beat up on me!
l hit you when
you get out of line.
And l never just hit you.
l always warn you first.
Then if you don`t shape up,
you get whacked.
l`m leaving.
Listen, l don`t know
who`s filling your head...
full of crazy notions,
but l`ve had enough.
l want supper. Get my meat loaf!
Uh-uh.
Come on, Cecilia. You know
l can`t live without you.
l`m like a little kid
when it comes to you.
That`s just tough.
Look, l`m sorry.
Can`t l be sorry?
l drink, l get crazy.
lt`s not me, it`s the whiskey.
l`m going, Monk.
Jesus Christ,
l can`t reason with you.
All right, go ahead.
See how far you get.
Go on. You won`t last.
You see how it is
out in the real world.
Go on, you`ll come back.
You`re just bluff.
You`re all phony.
You`ll be back.
lt may take a week or an hour,
but you`ll be back!
Oh, jeez!
Look at all those guys.
Come on, honey.
We`re gonna make a buck.
l ordered bacon and tomato.
You brought me ham and swiss.
l`ll get it right away, ma`am.
Cecilia, l want you
to meet somebody.
Remember l was gonna keep
my eyes open for eligible men?
Oh, come on.
Just keep an open mind.
This is my sister Cecilia.
Mr. Teddy Ashcroft.
-How do you do?
-Charmed.
Teddy`s an exterminator.
Wright-Merson Pest Control.
My specialty are
mice and silverfish.
l`m pleased to meet you.
-Waitress! My hamburger!
-l`m coming!
-Can we have a check?
-l`ll be right there.
That`s it, Cecilia.
You`re fired. Get out!
But l`ll pay for it.
l`ll be more careful.
Out. Take off your apron.
Go home. You`re fired.
lf she goes, then l go, too.
That`s fine with me.
She doesn`t mean that.
You`ve got kids.
Then tell her
to mind her own business.
You`re fired.
Back from Egypt.
From the Bedouins to Broadway.
Though l`m not
a religious man...
l hereby vow never to fly over
the Atlantic in bumpy weather...
and never to look
at another camel.
Drinks, anyone?
Boy, l can`t wait
to get out of these clothes...
and hit some of the night spots.
Well, children,
let`s not waste any time.
The floor show at the Copacabana
starts in ten minutes...
and we`re meeting
the Countess and Larry Wilde.
Well, l am impressed.
You have yourself
quite a place here.
l still can`t get over the fact
that 24 hours ago...
l was in an Egyptian tomb.
l didn`t know any
of you wonderful people...
and here l am now.
l`m on the verge
of a madcap Manhattan weekend.
l hope you like
your martinis very dry.
No, thanks.
l`ll wait for that glass
of champagne at the Copacabana.
Miss Rita,
something on your mind?
You ain`t been yourself since
you come back from the pyramids.
lt`s nothing. l`ll be OK.
l don`t suspect
it has anything to do...
with that explorer fella,
Mr. Tom Baxter?
Why would you say that?
The way he speaks--
all romantic-like.
Come on, Delilah, draw my bath.
Yes, ma`am.
Will you be wantin` the big
bubbles or the asses` milk?
Boy, l can`t wait
to get out of these clothes...
and hit some of the night spots.
Well, children,
let`s not waste any time.
The floor show at the Copacabana
starts in ten minutes...
and we`re meeting
the Countess and Larry Wilde.
Well, l am very impressed.
You have yourself
quite a place here.
l still can`t get over the fact
that 24 hours ago...
l was in an Egyptian tomb.
l didn`t know any
of you wonderful people...
and here l am now.
l`m on the verge
of a madcap Manhattan weekend.
My God, you must
really love this picture.
Me?
You`ve been here all day, and
l`ve seen you here twice before.
You mean me?
Yes, you. This is the fifth time
you`re seeing this.
Henry, come here. Quickly.
l gotta speak to you.
Oh, my God!
Listen, old sport,
you`re on the wrong side.
Tom, get back here.
We`re in the middle of a story.
l want to have a look around.
Go on without me.
-Who are you?
-Cecilia.
l`ll go get the manager.
Let`s go somewhere
where we can talk.
But you`re in the movie!
Wrong, Cecilia, l`m free.
After 2,000 performances of
the same monotonous routine...
l`m free!
Call Father Donnelly.
l don`t understand.
What`s going on? Who are you?
Who am l? You`ve seen
the movie five times.
l`m Tom Baxter...
poet, adventurer, explorer,
of the Chicago Baxters.
l know you`re Tom Baxter.
You wind up with Kitty Haynes,
the nightclub singer.
-Not anymore l don`t.
-What do you mean?
l`m out before the wedding.
l`m free.
Don`t you have to marry her?
Not while l`m here
and she`s up there.
Don`t you want to?
She`s so beautiful.
She`s not for me. Too bony.
Kitty Haynes
the nightclub singer is bony?
l need a place to hide.
l`m never going back
now that l`ve met you.
A place to hide?
What`s happening?
Tom has left.
He just walked right out.
l don`t know how he did it.
l can`t get out.
This is just disgusting.
l am an heiress...
and l don`t have
to put up with this.
He left the picture?
Oh, my gosh.
Well, don`t panic.
Stay up there and keep calm.
Keep calm? Are you crazy?
Did somebody call for a priest?
Thank God you`re here.
Wait a minute.
This is the second reel.
l`m not on till later.
Can`t you go on?
There`s an audience.
How? Tom was
the linchpin of the story.
She`s right, whoever you are.
Although this is my story,
Tom moves the exposition--
lt`s not your story.
lt`s the story...
of a man`s quest
for self-fulfillment.
lt`s the story of
a complex tortured soul--
lt`s the story of the effect
of money on true romance.
My upbringing, my wealth--
l`m the one who marries royalty.
Nobody cares.
What do you mean
they don`t care?
They wouldn`t sell a ticket
if it were your story.
-Stop arguing.
-And do what?
Maybe you should just
turn the projector off.
Don`t turn the projector off!
lt gets black and we disappear.
Easy, my friend.
We`re all in this together.
You don`t understand
what it`s like to disappear...
to be nothing, annihilated!
Don`t turn the projector off.
Miss Rita, your bath is ready.
-Not now, dear.
-What`s going on?
-What`s he doing here?
-Have a martini.
He`s not supposed
to be here till reel six.
We know that, Delilah.
What the hell is going on?
Somebody trying to hustle me?
l know what this is.
lt`s an amusement park!
lt`s usually pretty dead
around here till summer.
l know exactly what
an amusement park is...
and what goes on, l do!
That`s good.
lt`s written into my character.
Remember, l invite
Kitty to Luna Park...
but she prefers just
to stay home and talk.
So it`s in me!
Too bad nothing`s open.
l`m starved!
You are?
l left the movie
before the Copacabana scenes.
That`s when l usually eat.
Wait! What am l thinking?
Look, here, l`ve got
a whole bag of popcorn.
You can have that.
Also, l have a Milky-Way bar.
-No, popcorn is...
-Might want it later.
Boy! So that`s what
popcorn tastes like!
Been watching people eat it
for all those performances.
When they rattle those bags,
though, that`s annoying.
l still don`t understand
what`s going on.
l wanted to meet you.
Don`t tell me you didn`t
see me looking at you...
out of the corner of my eye...
when Kitty Haynes
is doing her nightclub number.
Wait a minute.
l remember seeing you.
You were looking off
to the side somehow...
but l never thought
it was to me.
And when we take the drive
to that little country inn...
when l propose to Kitty,
l was looking at you.
Kitty looked so beautiful
in that black dress.
She`s nothing compared to you.
What are you talking about?
l`m nothing.
Like hell you are.
You`re fetching.
-Fetching?
-Fetching.
Dad liked to use that word
about Mom back in Chicago.
''Min,'' he`d say,
`'you`re rather fetching.''
Dad was a card. Never met him.
He died before the movie begins.
Well, l have to confess.
My eye did always go to you
up on the screen.
-Really?
-Really.
Even around Detective Simms
and Henry Adams the playboy?
Even though
you`re not the main character...
you`re the one you look at.
You don`t think
l`m the main character?
l didn`t mean it that way.
l think you`re
positively essential.
ln fact, every time
l saw the movie...
l kept thinking,
`'Tom Baxter`s so handsome.''
Shouldn`t you be getting back?
l want to live and be free
to make my own choices.
Right now the country`s
not in such great shape.
What do you mean?
We`re in the middle
of a depression.
Everybody`s very poor.
l got plenty. Look at this!
But they need you. The story
doesn`t work without you.
l`m in love with you.
l`m married.
Happily?
l really should get back home.
l have to cook dinner.
Slip away from
your husband tonight.
Meet me here.
l`ll wait for you.
l want to learn about
the real world with you.
l can`t.
Look at it this way.
How many times is a man
so taken with a woman...
that he walks off
the screen to get her?
Let`s not panic.
We`re all adults.
Bored with sitting around.
l`m a dramatic character.
l need forward motion.
Here comes
the Countess and Larry.
Where is everybody?
Weren`t we meeting
at the Copacabana?
-Tom`s gone.
-What?
He left the film.
-What?
-Tom walked out on us.
But the Copa is where
the two of us meet.
l try to get him to marry me.
Forget it. l`m tired of
marrying you every night.
We never even get
to the bedroom.
-Where did Tom go?
-lnto the real world.
That two-bit minor character
leaves, and we`re stuck!
l wonder what it`s like
out there.
They don`t look like they`re
having too much fun to me.
What the hell
kind of movie is this?
The paper said it was a romance
set all over the world!
Don`t tell us your sad stories.
Do you think we like this?
Look at this. They sit around
and talk, and no action?
Nothing happens?
l want my money back.
This is outrageous.
Why don`t you stop yapping?
We`ve got problems of our own.
You can`t talk
to my wife like that.
Who do you think you are?
l`m a genuine countess
with a lot of dough...
and if that`s your wife,
she`s a tub of guts.
You said it!
What are you so nervous about?
Me? l`m not.
There`s too much pepper
in the sauce.
l told you to go easy
on the pepper.
l guess you and the guys...
are probably going out
again tonight, huh?
No, l`m not.
My back is acting up again.
You gotta give me one of
your special rubdowns.
l bought liniment.
What?
l can`t.
What do you mean, you can`t?
l`m sorry.
l didn`t mean l can`t.
l mean l made some plans.
You made plans?
l said l`d baby-sit tonight.
l ran into Mrs. Lorenzo
in the restaurant--
in the street today.
And she has some, l don`t know--
l think it was
a social club meeting...
or something
she wanted to go to.
lt won`t be too long.
l think it`s a great idea.
Yeah? Good.
Because we can use every penny.
So what am l gonna do
about my back?
Don`t worry.
l can do some now...
and l`ll do some when l come in.
You shouldn`t move around
too much. Just take it easy.
lf you`re gonna go baby-sit,
get paid in cash.
-l will.
-Don`t let her owe you.
lt`s a complete miracle!
We want our money back.
l don`t pay to watch those
socialites sitting around...
up there staring back at us
making nasty remarks.
ls that what they`re doing now?
Last time l looked, the priest
had a deck of cards...
and the men
were playing pinochle.
How`d this first happen?
lt`s probably
all the electrical storms...
we`ve had this season.
The air is charged.
Fellas, l depend on the Jewel.
l got personal expenses.
l got no substitute
picture to put in here.
l want my money back!
This is a swindle!
There`s no story.
Mrs. Lupus likes a story.
l still think you should turn
the projector off and shut down.
This could be the work
of Reds or anarchists.
You can`t do that.
lf he turns off the projector...
you`re liable
to strand this Tom Baxter...
out in the world someplace.
You want an extra guy
running around?
l saw the movie last week.
This is not what happens.
Where is the Tom Baxter
character?
You`ll get your money back.
l want what happened last week
to happen this week.
Otherwise,
what`s life all about anyway?
Can`t we just go in
and take a look?
We don`t want to stay long.
lf you want to see it,
you have to pay admission.
Keep moving, folks.
Any word about Tom Baxter?
Nothing yet.
What are you people doing here?
We can`t continue the story
until Tom gets back.
We don`t mind observing you all.
My husband is a student
of the human personality.
Well, we`re not human.
lt doesn`t matter to Harold.
He has trouble with humans.
Where do l have trouble
with real people?
l suppose you behave
perfectly with Donald.
He won`t speak
to my own son-in-law.
l won`t speak? The kid is quiet.
He never makes conversation.
He has to be drawn out.
l don`t like to draw people out.
That`s what l said.
He has trouble with live humans.
Yes, RKO!
l want to speak
to Mr. Raoul Hirsch.
He`s the producer
of ''The Purple Rose of Cairo.''
No, he`s not.
Just tell him l have
a theater in New Jersey...
and there`s a crisis
with his film.
This is Mr. Hirsch.
What`s the problem?
What?
They`re all sitting around
up there on the screen.
Rita, the Countess,
Larry Wilde, the playboy.
People are demanding
their money back.
The theater
is nine-tenths empty.
Take a walk, will you?
Look, he just walked out!
Baxter.
The Communist is screaming...
the priest in reel five
is in reel two.
How can he come off the screen?
lt`s impossible.
lt`s never happened
before in history.
Just because a thing
never happened before...
doesn`t mean it can`t
happen for first time.
That`s all you need--hundreds
of Tom Baxters on the loose.
Hundreds?
As your lawyer,
l advise you to control it fast.
A character from one of
your productions on the loose?
Who knows what he`s capable of?
Robbery, murder. l see lawsuits.
l`d charter a plane right away,
and l`d get down there fast.
Get me Gil Shepherd.
l`m sorry l`m not
too light on my feet.
You`re a feather in my arms.
Monk never took me dancing,
not even when we first met...
not even if l begged him.
Really?
So it`s been bad for you?
lt`s been hard for everyone.
Living in a world
with no jobs and wars.
You probably never even
heard of the Great War.
Sorry. l missed it.
People get old and sick
and never find true love.
Where l come from,
people don`t disappoint.
They`re consistent.
Always reliable.
You don`t find that kind
in real life.
You have.
ls it true they`re talking to
you about the life of Lindbergh?
lt`s nearly set, but don`t
print it till it`s firm.
You were great
in ''The Purple Rose of Cairo.''
Thanks. Did you know...
l was singled out by all
the East Coast critics?
The New York Times
said l had almost...
too smoldering a quality
just to play comedy.
Would you play Lindbergh
the way you played Tom Baxter?
Of course not.
Tom was kind of a change of pace
from my earlier roles.
l played Tom Baxter
with a kind of a poetic...
idealistic quality that just--
Lindbergh was a loner.
He was self-reliant.
l`d have to work it out
with my dialogue coach.
He`s a genius.
Can l see you for
a minute alone, please?
-Excuse me. l`m sorry.
-What`s up?
Baxter`s come off the screen and
is running around New Jersey.
What are you talking about?
l just spoke to Raoul Hirsch.
Nobody knows how it happened,
but he`s done it.
How could he do that?
lt`s not physically possible.
ln New Jersey,
anything can happen.
But l created the character.
That`s my point!
As your agent...
l`d hate anything for happen
to your career now.
-Like what?
-Who knows?
Your double is on the loose.
What`s he up to?
ls he robbing banks?
Raping broads?
-ls he?
-Who knows?
The last thing we need
is for you to get a rep--
Last thing we need is for you
to get a difficult reputation.
lt`s not my fault!
Raoul Hirsch said if you can`t
control your own creation...
nobody`s gonna risk
a picture on you.
l worked so hard
to make him real.
-Maybe you overdid it.
-l`ll sue my dialogue coach.
You`ve got to fly down there
and check into this quick.
Right now it`s only
one movie house, but who knows?
l`m afraid to fly.
This is the scandal of all time.
You know what happened
to Fatty Arbuckle`s career?
l`ll fly.
Good.
This is how they drink
champagne in Cairo.
l never had champagne before.
lt makes me feel silly.
lt`s supposed to.
The check,
as you requested, sir.
lt`s so much!
l hope you found it
to your liking, sir.
lt was superb.
My compliments to the chef...
and keep 20% for yourself.
No, make that 30%.
Quite amusing.
What is?
The fake money.
Fake money?
ls it play money, sir,
or stage money?
Keep 30% for yourself
and stop looking so serious.
l`ll get the Maitre D`.
That`s not real money!
What do you mean,
it`s not real money?
Oh, my God!
Do you have any money?
No! What are we gonna do?
We`ll have to run for it.
l can`t run.
My ankles are bad
from waitressing.
Get up. Follow me.
Quick, get in the car!
Tom, this is not our car.
We don`t have a car.
We came by foot.
lt doesn`t go.
Of course it doesn`t go.
There`s no key!
l don`t understand.
They always go in the movie.
This is real life.
They don`t start without a key!
They don`t? Let`s go!
Get back here!
You can`t run out on this check!
A couple of deadbeats!
Get back here right now!
l`m sorry about the money.
l had no idea.
That`s OK.
lt`s not gonna be so easy...
to get along without it
in this world.
l guess l have to get a job.
That`s not gonna be
so easy, either.
Right now the whole
country`s out of work.
Then we`ll live on love.
We`ll have to make some
concessions, but so what?
-We`ll have each other.
-That`s movie talk.
You look so beautiful
in this light.
But you`re not real.
Was that real enough for you?
You kiss perfectly.
lt`s what l dreamed
kissing would be like.
Come away with me to Cairo.
Cairo?
We`ll live in the desert.
The blue-gold light of sunset
falling over your hair.
l`m sorry. l`m a little
tipsy from the champ--
Where`s the fade-out?
What?
Always when the kissing
gets hot and heavy...
just before the lovemaking,
there`s a fade-out.
Then what?
Then we`re making love
in some private, perfect place.
That`s not how it happens here.
There`s no fade-out?
No. But when you kissed me,
l felt like my heart faded out.
l closed my eyes,
and l was in some private place.
How fascinating. You make love
without fading out?
l can`t wait to see this.
Listen, l...
l`m not that kind of girl.
l`m married.
lt`s clear how miserable
you are with your husband.
lf he hits you again,
you tell me.
l`d be forced
to knock his teeth out.
l don`t think that`d be
such a good idea. He`s big.
l`m sorry.
lt`s written into my character,
so l`d do it.
Listen. l think
l`d better go home now.
lt`s late.
lt`s been a whirlwind of a day.
What are you going to do?
l`ll sleep here at the carousel,
then walk around...
drink in the night air...
enjoy my freedom...
and dream of you.
You got in late last night.
You were out like a light.
l took a hot bath to relax me.
You want to get me
a cup of coffee?
Sure.
There was some big deal
going on at the movie house.
A big crowd when l went
to buy cigarettes.
l couldn`t get
the story straight.
Some guy ran out the side exit
with a customer.
Who?
A woman, a guy--an actor.
l don`t know what the hell
the cop was talking about.
He didn`t know.
They didn`t know
who the woman was?
Some woman dragged out
in the dark.
They got those real
Geronimos at movie houses.
That`s why l don`t like you
staying out so late.
l know. l couldn`t help it.
The Lorenzos didn`t get back
till late. l couldn`t leave.
l hope you got paid overtime.
Sure.
Good. Let`s have it.
They didn`t have any cash.
l`ll have to come back
for it later today.
l told you to get paid in cash.
l know, but all
they had was big bills.
l was getting late.
They`re gonna fork it over
today, right?
They will.
Leave something to you...
you can bet
you`re gonna get fouled up.
You have no idea where he went?
Mr. Hirsch,
this is awful for us.
lt`s really difficult.
Think of me,
my reputation, my career.
First thing is,
we got to keep it contained.
The word`s out already.
We got to keep the crisis local.
l know the two reporters
in town.
They`re old friends.
Maybe l could talk--
A couple bucks spread around
town will buy us some time.
Don`t worry about a thing.
l mean, we`re all so lost.
l know it`s rough.
l just want the whole cast
to know...
how much l appreciate your
staying up there on the screen.
l hope you`re not gonna
hold this against me, R.H.
You created the part
of Tom Baxter, Gil.
The facts are undeniable.
l want to go, too.
l want to be free! l want out!
l`m warning you,
that`s Communist talk.
We`re gonna have to pull
the film out of the theatre...
and you`re gonna have
to make good my receipts.
You`re thinking
of pulling the film...
because a minor
character`s missing?
A minor character?
Would you listen to her?
He may not have the most lines,
but the plot turns on Baxter.
l deliberately played him
with a cheerful bravado.
Who cares how you played him?
-He`s minor.
-That`s right.
l`d like to get
my hands on him !
Right when my career
was taking off.
He could be raping
that woman he abducted.
And he`s got my fingerprints.
My exact prints!
You know what they get
for rape in a small town?
Especially by a man
in a pith helmet?
lf this is the start
of a new trend...
our industry`s as good as dead.
The real ones want
their lives fiction...
and the fictional ones
want their lives real.
Does anybody know
who that woman was?
lt was all so crazy,
nobody noticed.
Two doughnuts and a container
of coffee to go, please.
Right now, it`s chaos.
How can rumors be circulating
at the Brown Derby?
lt just happened.
Squash it, Herbie!
l`ve got a career on the line.
Look, l`ll call you
the minute l hear.
Excuse me.
What are you doing here?
l`m sorry,
l don`t have a pencil...
or l`d give you an autograph.
Where did you get those clothes?
Pardon me?
Your clothes.
Where`d you get them?
A little store
on Sunset and Vine.
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
Excuse me.
l just bought you these.
Two doughnuts.
For me?
Well, thank you very much.
l hope you
enjoy my next movie.
l thought you were gonna
stay hidden at the park.
What park?
What`s the matter with you?
You`re acting so peculiar.
Tom? No, l`m--
Wait a minute! Come here.
What`s come over you?
l`m not Tom.
l`m Gil Shepherd. l play Tom.
How do you know Tom?
You`re Gil--
Oh, my God!
l don`t believe it!
l`ve seen you in lots of movies.
Where`s Tom?
`'Broadway Bachelors,'' right?
Yeah.
`'Honeymoon in Haiti''?
l`ve done about six.
-You were you a scream.
-Thank you very much.
l try to do one a year,
you know.
Just to keep--Where`s Tom?
Why?
He`s my character.
l created him.
Didn`t the man who wrote
the movie do that?
Yes, technically,
but l made him live.
l fleshed him out.
You did a wonderful job.
He`s adorable.
Thank you very much.
What`s your name?
-Where is he?
-Why?
Has he done anything wrong?
Like what?
Has he stolen anything
or attacked any females? You?
Gosh, no.
He`s as sweet as can be.
l played him sweet.
l was well-reviewed.
lt comes across.
Good. l gotta speak to him.
You`re not upset with him?
A little, yes,
but l know if l spoke to him...
we could straighten
everything out.
l don`t know.
Please, l have a right.
lt has to be secret.
He doesn`t want
to go back into the movie.
-He doesn`t?
-No. He loves being free.
He`s having
the time of his life.
Would you take me to him?
Trust me.
Please.
Monk, somebody saw
your wife last night...
at the Dine and Dance joint.
Sure. She`s there every night
with the Rockefellers.
She was with this
crazy-looking guy...
wearing an explorer`s hat
and breeches.
Breeches? You`re nuts.
She was baby-sitting.
Right. l guess you know it all.
All right, who`s next?
Cecilia, l dreamed
of us in Cairo--
-l brought--
-Gil Shepherd.
-l play you in the movie.
-You do?
How dare you run away!
This is disconcerting.
l`ll show you the meaning
of disconcerting!
l`m trying to build a career!
l don`t want to be
in the film anymore.
l`m in love with Cecilia!
Mr. Shepherd,
you said you weren`t angry.
You can`t do this to me.
lt`s my best role.
l`ve been critically
acclaimed for this!
Because of the way l do it.
No, because of the way l do it.
l`m doing it, not you.
lt`s me, not him !
Then how do you
explain that here l am?
l took you from the printed
page and made you live.
-So l`m living.
-For the screen only!
l want my freedom.
l don`t want another one of me
running around the world.
l can just imagine what he`s--
Are you afraid
l`ll embarrass you?
Frankly, l`m afraid--
But you created me.
Look, be reasonable here.
l`m starting to build a career.
ls life up on the screen
so terrible?
l want to be with Cecilia.
l`m in love with her.
Would you tell him to go back?
Tell him you don`t love him.
Tell him you can`t love him.
He`s fictional.
Do you want to waste your time
with a fictional character?
You`re a sweet girl.
You deserve an actual human.
But Tom`s perfect.
But he`s not real.
What good is perfect
if the man`s not real?
l can learn to be real.
lt`s easy.
There`s nothing to it.
Being real comes
very naturally to me.
You can`t learn to be real.
lt`s like being a midget.
lt`s not a thing you can learn.
Some of us are real,
some are not.
l say l can do it.
l`m not staying here
to argue with you.
l`m going back to town...
and call my attorney,
the actors` union.
l won`t take this lying down,
nor will Raoul Hirsch.
Nor the police, nor the FBl.
We found him.
Gil Shepherd found him...
but he refuses to get
back on the screen.
R.H. is very upset.
We can`t force him.
lt`s not a crime.
We need a plan.
The press is on our side.
lt took a few bucks, but
they`ll keep it quiet for now.
What? Really?
The Tom Baxter character
in a movie house in Chicago...
has been forgetting his lines.
He just got a call
from the manager.
lf anybody wants me,
l`ll be in the bathroom...
on the floor...weeping.
Aren`t you at all even worried?
What about Raoul Hirsch
or the FBl?
lf l can be with you,
l`m never going back.
-But, you know--
-No more buts.
l said l`d learn about
the real world. Show me.
lt`s beautiful.
l`m not sure exactly what it is.
This is a church.
You do believe in God,
don`t you?
Meaning...
The reason for everything,
the world, the universe.
l think l know what you mean.
The two men who wrote
`'The Purple Rose of Cairo''--
lrving Sachs and R.H. Levine.
They`re writers
who collaborate on films.
l`m talking about something
much bigger than that.
Think for a minute.
A reason for everything.
Otherwise, it`d be like
a movie with no point...
and no happy ending.
So there you are.
l`m looking for you.
This is my husband.
This is Tom Baxter.
Adventurer, explorer,
of the Chicago Baxters.
l`m charmed to meet you.
So you wear the britches.
What do you want
to talk to me about?
l heard you were out
on the town last night.
l admit l didn`t
tell the truth about that...
but things have been
so strange the last 24 hours.
l told you what l`d do
if you ever lied to me!
Obviously, your marriage
has come to an impasse, sir.
Let`s just talk.
You`re coming home with me!
Perhaps you don`t
understand, sir...
but l`m in love with your wife.
Close your yap, jackass.
Now let`s go.
You`re failing
to understand, sir.
-She`s not coming with you.
-She`s not?
Take your hands off her.
No man will hit the woman
l love, nor any woman--
Beat it!
Before l take you apart!
He`s got a terrible temper!
lt`s written into
my character--courage.
Stop it!
Come on.
Stop it! What are you doing?
Time for the old one-two.
l think he`s had enough.
Sorry, pal,
about the rough stuff.
You all right?
Let me give you a hand.
There was--
That`s not fair.
What are you doing?
You`re coming home with me now.
-No, l`m not.
-What`d you say?
l`m going to stay
and see that Tom`s OK.
-You`re a bully.
-l gave you an order.
l don`t care.
l`m tired of taking your orders.
You could have killed him.
All right. l`m sorry.
l didn`t mean it.
You can`t go through life
beating people up.
l`m telling you one more time.
You coming with me?
No, l`m not.
l`m telling you one more time.
You coming?
-Come on!
-No, l`m not!
The hell with it.
l need a beer anyway.
l`ll see you later.
Are you OK?
l`m fine.
You`re not even marked.
Your hair`s in place.
l don`t get hurt or bleed.
Hair doesn`t muss.
lt`s one of the advantages
of being imaginary.
You were very brave.
l had him, too,
till he started fighting dirty.
That`s why you`ll never
survive off the screen.
You were pretty brave, too.
You stood up to him.
You inspired me.
Mr. Shepherd.
Cecilia, look,
l gotta speak to you.
l`ve had a crazy morning.
l`m still shaking.
l don`t know what to do.
l`ve struggled my whole life.
Now l`m finally beginning
to break through...
and my whole career
is going right down the drain.
You don`t have to
worry about that.
You`ll always be
a great movie star.
That`s very nice of you,
but technically...
l`m not really a star yet.
l try to carry myself like one.
l do the best l can as
far as that, but star?
That`s a big word, isn`t it?
Star. Yeah.
Star? No.
You`re not just a pretty face.
You`re also a peach of an actor.
Really, l`ve seen you a lot.
You`ve got something.
ls that your opinion?
Sure. l see all the movies.
You`ve got--
How can l describe it?
You`ve got a magical glow.
Oh, boy!
To hear that from a real person.
That is just--
lt`s not one of those
movie colony bimbos...
with the fancy dresses,
filling you full of hot air.
Would you get over here
and sit down, please?
You can take it from me.
You`re not just
a flash in the pan.
lt would be very easy for me...
to trade on my looks
just like that...
but l have some serious
acting ambitions.
You should.
l think you`re great
in all the funny movies.
Thank you.
Really, l was thinking
you should play...
some of the more heroic parts.
l want to. l tell my agent
that a hundred times!
You could play, like,
Daniel Boone or someone--
Lindbergh.
You`d be wonderful as Lindbergh.
-You are a mind reader.
-You had the same thought?
l`m on the verge
of signing for that part.
-l am ! l can taste it.
-Really?
You`ll be wonderful!
There`s something inside you.
You have that same kind
of lone heroic quality.
You`re exactly right.
Everyone has been telling me
not to--you are right.
Don`t you listen.
Basically, l have been
a loner my entire life.
Sure, anyone can see that.
You`re deep
and probably complicated.
-Can l buy you lunch?
-Me?
Please. Can l?
l love talking to you.
l was going upstairs--
Come on.
l open myself up around you.
Have you ever been to Hollywood?
Come on. Of course not.
l would love to just
take you around Hollywood.
-Can l make a confession?
-Sure.
My real name
is not Gil Shepherd.
lt`s Herman Bardebedian.
Really?
Yeah. l`ve been a cab driver--
Boy, do you have a pretty face.
-Come on.
-You do!
Hi, big boy.
Are you alone?
Hello.
l`m alone for now...
but later l have
an appointment--
or should l say, rendezvous.
Good for you.
Where`d you get the funny suit?
What, this?
You coming from a costume party?
No. l`m Tom Baxter
of the Chicago Baxters--
explorer, poet, adventurer.
Just back from Cairo,
where l searched in vain...
for the legendary Purple Rose.
How about that?
Who are you?
My name`s Emma.
That`s lovely.
What do you do?
l`m a working girl.
And what do you do,
you delicate creature?
Anything that`ll make a buck.
We Baxters never really
had to worry about money.
l`ll bet. You want
to come along with me?
Where to, Emma?
Where l work. l think
you might have a good time.
Sounds enchanting.
l`m up for new experiences.
l may be able to help.
Hi, girls. This is Tom.
Hi there, ladies.
Don`t you all look enticing?
l know what you want.
You want to be
the great white hunter...
and you want me to be the tiger.
l don`t get it.
You will if you can afford it.
l met Tom out
at the amusement park.
That`s my hat.
l was thinking about something.
l can imagine.
Two of us at the same time?
l was thinking about
very deep things--
God and his relation with
lrving Sachs and R.H. Levine.
And l was thinking
about life in general--
the origin of everything
we see about us...
the finality of death...
and how almost magical
it seems in the real world...
as opposed to the world
of celluloid...
and flickering shadows.
Where did you find this clown?
For example,
the miracle of birth.
Now, l suppose some of you
lovely ladies are married.
Not anymore.
The absolutely astonishing
miracle of childbirth...
with all its attendant feelings
of humanity and pathos.
l stand in awe of existence.
Do you want to tie me up?
Tie you up?
That`s very funny.
She`s very funny.
Nice sense of humor--
the absurd non sequitur.
-What`s your name, sweetheart?
-Martha.
That`s the same name as
the ambassador`s wife.
Why didn`t you
bring the ambassador by?
He`s still up on the screen.
But do you share
my sense of wonderment...
at the very fabric of being?
The smell of a rose,
real food, sensuous music?
l`ve got a child.
You do? l see.
You`re a widow. Poor thing.
l got two kids, and he`s
right about giving birth.
lt is a beautiful experience.
l never had a baby.
l was pregnant, but l lost it.
l`m sorry to hear that.
lt always makes me cry
to think about it.
There, there.
You`ll have another chance.
Come on.
l`d be surprised...
if all you ladies
weren`t married soon...
especially by the way you dress.
lt`s so seductive to a man.
You like these stockings, Tom?
They`re just divine.
What kind of a club
is this, anyhow?
God, you`re a scream.
He`s terribly sweet.
He is. l wouldn`t mind
doing him for nothing.
Me, neither. Plus, he`s cute.
You can count me in. Come on.
We`re gonna take you
into the bedroom...
and give you an experience
you`ll never forget.
And it`s on us.
l came here
for a new experience.
You`re gonna get
a champion roll in the hay.
What, there`s hay
in the bedroom?
You ever been
to a brothel before?
What`s a brothel?
You must be kidding.
A brothel--
a bordello, a whorehouse.
l`m not following. What?
We go to bed with you
and make love, and you pay us.
Only, because you`re so sweet,
we want to treat you to a party.
Really?
Boy, this doesn`t ring a bell
with anything l know.
Come on, buddy.
You know about making love,
don`t you?
l can`t make love with you.
Don`t tell me
you don`t like women.
Or you were wounded in the war.
No, l`m in love
with someone else.
We`re not talking about in love.
We`re talking about making love.
But l love Cecilia.
So what? Marry Cecilia.
This is just for fun.
l couldn`t do that.
Ladies! My gracious!
Don`t think l`m not
appreciative of your offer...
though l must say the concept
is totally new to me...
but l`m just hopelessly
head-over-heels in love...
with Cecilia.
She is all l want.
My devotion is to her,
my loyalties.
Every breath she takes
makes my heart dance.
This guy just kills me.
Are there any other guys
like you out there?
Lawson`s Music Store.
This store`s been here
since l was a kid.
l wish l could play
an instrument.
That`s my other
ambition in life...
is to be a great
classical violinist...
thousands cheering me
night after night.
-l can play the ukulele.
-You can?
My father taught me
before he ran away.
l`m Alabamy bound
There`ll be no heebie-jeebies
hangin` round
Just gave the meanest
ticket man on earth
All l`m worth
To put my tootsies
in an upper berth
Just hear that choo-choo sound
Whoo whoo!
l know that soon
we`re gonna cover ground
And then l`ll holler
`cause the world will know
Here l go
l`m Alabamy bound
Whoa!
l`m Alabamy bound
-That was wonderful!
-Thanks.
That`s like a dream.
Listen.
My baby loves me
l don`t know nobody
As happy as we
She`s only 20
And l`m 21
We never worry
We`re just havin` fun
Bum bum bum
Sometimes we quarrel
And maybe we fight
But then we make up
The following night
When we`re together
We`re great company
l love my baby
And my baby loves me
That was wonderful!
After the Lindbergh movie,
you should do a musical.
l did have one bit in one once.
l saw ''Dancing Doughboys.''
`'Dancing Doughboys''!
You remembered!
That was great.
You turned
to lna Beasley and said...
`'l won`t be going south
with you this winter.''
That`s exac--Right.
`'l won`t be going south
with you this winter.
`'We have a little
score to settle...
`'on the other side
of the Atlantic.''
''Does this mean l won`t
be seeing you ever again?''
`'Ever is a long time.''
`'When you leave,
don`t look back.''
You remember it perfectly.
Then l took her in
my arms and l kissed her...
knowing it was
for the last time.
God, you`re beautiful.
Was it fun kissing lna Beasley?
lt was a movie kiss.
We professionals can put
that stuff on just like that.
lt looked like you loved her.
Oh, my goodness.
Feel my heart.
l bet--l should--
Thank you so much
for the ukulele.
Don`t be offended.
l didn`t mean--
l`m not offended.
l`m just confused.
l`m married.
l just met a wonderful new man.
He`s fictional,
but you can`t have everything.
Can l see you later?
No. l`m meeting Tom.
My own creation plagues me.
-Anything happening out there?
-Not a thing.
Life is amazing, isn`t it?
One little minor character,
takes some action...
and the whole world
is turned upside-down.
What if he never comes back?
We just drift till
they shut the projector.
Will you shut up? Stop that.
He`ll be back. l feel it.
l don`t want
to sit around and wait.
That`s exactly what they want.
-Who?
-The bosses.
Look at us! Sitting around,
slaves to some stupid scenario.
Meanwhile,
the fat cats in Hollywood...
are getting rich on our work--
studio heads,
writers, movie stars.
Stop it!
But we`re the ones who sweat!
We`re the characters
on the screen, not them !
You`re a Red.
l say unite, brothers,
and take action!
-What possible action?
-Shut up and sit down!
Wait a minute!
Shut up, will you?
What if all this is merely
a matter of semantics?
How can it be semantics?
Wait a minute.
Let`s just readjust
our definitions.
Let`s redefine ourselves
as the real world...
and them as the world of
illusion and shadow. You see?
We`re reality, they`re a dream.
You`d better calm down.
You`ve been up on the screen
flickering too long.
lt`s confirmed.
lt is?
l was afraid this might happen.
The Tom Baxter character...
tried leaving the screen
in four theaters--
St. Louis, Chicago,
Denver, and Detroit...
and he almost made it
in Detroit.
lt looks bad.
Those movie houses are
in a state of pandemonium.
There`s no way
to keep the lid on it.
l see hundreds of lawsuits.
We better pull
the picture out of release.
What, in those towns?
Everywhere.
Something`s obviously
gone very wrong here...
and the best course of
action is to shut down...
take our losses,
and get out of this mess...
before it really
gets out of hand.
Can you imagine hundreds of
Tom Baxters flying around wild?
And you responsible
for every one of them.
The best thing to do is
to quit while there`s...
only of them out there,
but what do we do about him?
We gotta get him back
in the picture...
then we turn off the projector
and burn the prints.
And the negative.
What a shame.
lt was such a good picture.
l missed you. You`re late.
l`m sorry. l came
as quickly as l could.
l love you.
Thank you.
My feelings are so jumbled.
l know. You`re married,
and you`re old-fashioned...
and l`m a whole new idea.
But the truth is,
you`re unhappily married...
and l`m gonna take you
away from all this.
l know you love me.
l do love you.
Don`t you share my feelings?
That`s just it.
You`re some kind of phantom.
Look, l don`t want
to talk anymore...
about what`s real
and what`s illusion.
Life`s too short to spend time
thinking about life.
-Let`s just live it.
-Live it how?
We`ll begin with dinner.
Listen, no.
l`ve only got a few dollars.
We`re not gonna use your money.
That`s all we have,
unless you`ve done something.
Say no more.
The moon will be full,
the stars will be out.
We`re going stepping.
-But we`re broke.
-Leave that to me.
lt`s him !
You`re back!
l want you to meet
my fiancee Cecilia.
Well, you know
all these people.
lt`s not possible.
l`m in the world
of the possible.
You better get back in
the story, you little weasel.
You anticipate me.
Follow me. Trust me.
He just comes
and goes like he pleases.
-Come on.
-Where am l?
-She can`t be in here.
-Why not? Come on.
My money`s good up here.
l feel like l`m floating on air.
lt upsets the balance!
What`s the difference?
He`s back, isn`t he?
l told you he`d be back.
Can we get on with the plot now?
How can we with her here?
She`s here with me.
l`ll sock any man in the jaw
who makes her feel unwanted.
lt`s about time you got back.
All right. Now we finally
go to the Copacabana.
None of us have eaten in ages.
Good. l`m bringing a guest.
Won`t Kitty Haynes be surprised.
Table for seven, please, Arturo.
Yes, sir. Seven?
Seven.
That`s impossible.
lt`s always six.
We have an extra.
Seven, Arturo.
This person?
So let`s not speak
of love sublime
Because time
brings on a breakup
There`ll be no tears
and no emotional scenes
To spoil my make-up
And when the end comes,
l`ll take up the slack...
Would you like
some more champagne?
Thank you.
Listen, l don`t know
what they`re charging you...
but those champagne bottles
are filled with ginger ale.
That`s the movies, kid.
l don`t care.
l love every minute of it.
...Domesticating
Every Sunday, Monday
One day at a time
Let`s take it
one day at a time
Let`s take it
one day at a time
Bravo!
Bravo!
Thank you.
Who are you?
l came with Tom.
You sing so beautifully.
What the hell is this?
We`re supposed to meet
and marry.
-Who`s the skirt?
-My fiancee.
He met her in New Jersey.
-What is this?
-Kitty, she`s real.
Quick!
Pour ginger ale over her.
What`s all the fuss about?
Nothing, Arturo.
We were just leaving.
Leaving where?
l`m all mixed up.
l`m going to show
Cecilia the town.
Are we chucking out the plot?
Exactly.
Every man for himself.
Then l don`t have
to seat people anymore.
l can do what it is
l`ve always wanted to do!
What`s that?
Hit it, boys!
l had such a wonderful time.
Me, too.
Where are all the others?
l don`t know. Probably
just still dancing away.
Why, does it matter?
l wanted to get you alone.
lt`s so beautiful here.
The white telephone.
l`ve dreamed of having
a white telephone.
Your dreams are my dreams.
My whole life, l`ve wondered
what it would be like...
to be this side
of the screen.
You see that city
out there waking up?
That`s yours for the asking.
My heart`s beating so fast.
Gil, what are you doing here?
l came in here to think.
What are you doing here?
l took her on a date.
All right?
Can`t you
just leave us alone?
l can`t leave her alone.
l`m jealous.
You`re jealous?
What do you want me to say?
l can`t get Cecilia
out of my mind.
Gil, do you mean that?
For God`s sake, would you
go back to Hollywood, please?
l`m embarrassed to admit it.
You said l had a magical glow,
but it`s you.
You`re the one that has one.
And even though
we`ve just met...
l know that this
is the real thing.
You can`t be in love
with Cecilia.
She`s in love with me!
Why don`t you turn around
and re-enter the film?
l`m never going back!
l can`t believe it.
They`re at it again.
Will you get back up here?
See, there you go.
You`re ruining everything.
You`re the one
who`s ruining everything.
lf it wasn`t for me,
there wouldn`t be any you.
Don`t be so sure.
l could have been played...
by Frederick March
or Leslie Howard.
You`re wrong.
The part`s too insignificant...
to attract a major star.
lnsignificant?
Like hell it is!
What are you talking about?
l`m not a minor character.
Jeez. You know,
l haven`t been able...
to think of anything
since we`ve met.
l have to have
some time with you...
to show you what
real life can be like...
if two people really
care for each other.
Last week, l was unloved.
Now two people love me,
and it`s the same two people.
Go with the real guy, honey.
We`re limited.
Go with Tom. He`s got no flaws.
Go with somebody, child!
`Cause l`s gettin` bored.
She`s going to marry me.
You`re wasting your time.
Will you get back on the screen?
l`m trying to tell Cecilia
l`m in love with her.
l love you.
l`m honest, dependable,
courageous, romantic...
and a great kisser.
And l`m real.
Let`s go, Cecilia.
Choose one of them
so we can settle this thing.
The most human of all attributes
is your ability to choose.
Wait a minute.
lf she chooses Tom...
how are we gonna end the story?
We`ll be stuck here forever.
Father Donnelly can marry us
right here in the movie house.
That won`t stand up in court.
The priest has to be human.
The Bible never says
a priest can`t be on film.
l`m already married.
Come away with me to Hollywood.
Just like that?
Do something impulsive
for once in your life.
Just throw your stuff in
a valise and come away with me.
Really. And don`t forget
that ukulele.
What ukulele?
Look, l love you.
l know that only happens
in movies, but l do.
Cecilia, you`re
throwing away perfection!
Don`t tell her that.
We need Tom back!
-lt`s so romantic!
-Women!
l`m crushed. Devastated.
Try to understand.
You`ll be fine. ln your world...
things have a way
of always working out right.
l`m a real person.
No matter how tempted l am,
l have to choose the real world.
l loved every minute with you.
l`ll never forget
our night on the town.
Good-bye.
You`re better off
with us, old sport.
You really are.
Can we get on with
`'The Purple Rose of Cairo''?
Anyone wants me,
l`ll be in reel six.
Kitty`s waiting for you.
Lord, have mercy!
What a day!
Your explorer friend`s OK.
l saw him walking
around town with you.
He`s OK, no thanks to you.
l didn`t mean
to be so rough on him.
lt`s just that l get jealous
when it comes to you.
Do you?
Christ, you know l do.
l know l treat you rough.
lt`s my way.
lt doesn`t mean
l don`t feel for you.
What are you doing?
Leaving.
Here we go again.
You don`t feel for me.
All you feel for is yourself...
your beer, your card games,
your women.
OK. l`m gonna
turn over a new leaf.
lt`s too late. l`m going.
l should have
left a long time ago.
l would`ve, except l was
scared of being alone.
So, what now?
You found some chump...
who`s filling your head
with big ideas.
No. l got a chance
to change my life.
l`m moving to Hollywood.
Now, listen,
l said l was sorry...
about being rough with your
friend, but let`s shape up.
lt`s too late!
Like hell it is...
and don`t be giving me
that big-headed stuff, you hear?
Because l`m the guy
that can slap you down.
Go ahead and hit me.
Just go ahead!
l`m leaving anyway!
This never would`ve happened
if you didn`t meet that guy.
That`s probably right...
and we would have
gone on the same way...
`til we were too old
to hope for something better.
But l did meet him.
And l have feelings for him.
And he has for me.
What about me?
l still care for you,
if you can believe that...
but out of the blue
for the first time in my life...
somebody`s in love with me.
But you just met each other.
Love at first sight doesn`t
only happen just in the movies.
Don`t go. You hear me?
Now wait a minute.
l said don`t go!
-You stay here!
-Take care of yourself.
All right. Well, go.
See if l care.
Go, see what it is out there.
lt ain`t the movies!
lt`s real life,
and you`ll be back.
Mark my words. You`ll be back!
What are you doing here?
-Meeting Gil Shepherd.
-They`re all gone.
What do you mean?
They went back to Hollywood.
Gil, too?
Mr. Shepherd, yeah.
Soon as Tom Baxter went back up
on the movie screen...
couldn`t wait
to get out of here.
He said this was
a close call for his career.
l think he`s going to play
Charles Lindbergh.
Don`t forget, Cecilia.
Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers
start today.
Heaven
l`m in heaven
And my heart beats so
that l can hardly speak
And l seem to find
the happiness l seek
When we`re out together
dancing cheek to cheek
Heaven
l`m in heaven
And the cares that hung
around me through the week
Seem to vanish
like a gambler`s lucky streak
When we`re out together
dancing cheek to cheek
Oh, l love to climb a mountain
And to reach the highest peak
But it doesn`t thrill me
half as much
As dancing cheek to cheek