Ramona (2022) Movie Script
Dad?
Dad?
I'll be right up!
CHAPTER 1:
RAMONA MET BRUNO
Hi.
A coffee, please.
Thank you.
Sorry.
What did you add to your juice?
This?
Some concoction
they sold me at the drugstore.
It's for anxiety, it's supposed to be
all natural and relaxing, who knows?
CBD.
- CB What?
- CBD.
They extract it from marijuana,
it doesn't give you a high, just relaxes,
eases pain, and all sorts of miracles.
I don't think so. It doesn't say
anything about marijuana here.
I'm not completely sure
it's legal in Spain,
so they might have left it out.
Wanna try?
Supposedly all plants, nothing illegal.
Okay.
That's enough.
Thanks.
Do you have anxiety too?
Me? Over the top.
- Just like everyone else.
- No.
Not everyone has anxiety.
In cities they do.
Maybe in the country they don't.
If I take a look around,
it's unbelievable.
People have mind-boggling jobs.
Jobs where they fire people non-stop.
Those people exist.
I'm not judging, I understand
we all have a role to play.
But some spend their days firing people.
Or evicting or whatever.
And they're cool as a cucumber.
As a cucumber! If I get into
an argument with my brother,
I lose it.
Yeah, but those people you're
talking about keep it inside
and then get pancreatic cancer
or whatever.
- You think so?
- Sure.
Whining is so much better.
So much healthier.
Why do you have anxiety.
I'm sorry,
but you don't look anxious at all.
- Because I live in Lavapies...
- I used to live there.
- Years and years.
- It's nice, but I hate it.
Why?
Because in my building there's been
a narco house for quite a while.
And now they've also occupied
the third floor.
So my hallway is full of junkies.
You live in an eighties movie.
On top of that, yesterday
a six-foot-five dude
almost broke into the Airbnb
two Americans were staying at.
- A junkie?
- No, a rapist.
Junkies usually aren't dangerous.
No, not junkies, but rapists yes.
Don't you carry a mace spray?
I hadn't thought about that.
There's a Cortzar short story
where they occupy a house bit by bit
until the owner has to leave.
I don't even want to hear it.
- That's what it looks like!
- 'Cause paranoia...
Right. But it's good film material.
No. Forget it.
Hey, do you notice anything?
What?
- The concoction.
- No.
There's no concoction for my anxiety.
I need hard drugs.
Then let's order
a shot of something with our coffee.
Well, I have an excuse
with the Americans and all that, right?
Can I get a couple
of shots of brandy here, please?
In this same glass.
Anyway, this concoction thing
is a scam.
Almost anything they're selling
as eco-healthy-natural is a scam.
Yeah, I just don't get it.
I mean, these bars are almost extinct
Yeah, it's unbelievable.
Madrid's typical bars
have disappeared.
Now they're all the same
wherever you go in the world.
They're all franchises
or eco-hipster-trendy shit.
Eco!
Eco is the king of the prefixes!
- Eco-detergent.
- Eco-fuck.
Eco-coffee, eco-friend.
Eco is fucking it!
And I'll admit it works.
When I'm at the supermarket,
if in doubt, I always buy eco.
It could just as well say
"expensive" instead of eco.
- So that's...
- This is the greatest.
Are you kidding me?
Is that all real, everything,
the face, the clothes?
You bet it is.
This is the latest thing.
This is fashionable!
This guy has taken Spanish guile
to new heights,
he's pulling everyone's leg.
I know. For me the worst thing
is he's behaving all macho,
he wants to fuck them all,
but he's suddenly so sensitive.
"I'm so sensitive, leave me alone."
Those people are the worst.
Fuck me, it's no fucking wonder.
Let me see a few more.
And then my cousins, all of them
super feminists, are all in love with him.
Okay, yeah, his songs are cool,
but the lyrics... It makes no sense.
I've had it with all this shit.
- Fuck me.
- Okay, enough. You're not into phones.
"Life happens outside of a screen."
Do you know what I just realized?
You're truly antiestablishment.
Because my cousin... He's a rapper.
He thinks he's so antiestablishment,
and he has iPhone, Instagram,
the whole lot, but you don't.
Nobody can sell you anything!
And that's cool, right?
Well, it's a bit old-time,
because you're out of the loop, but...
Whatever.
Wow, I thought it was cool.
I mean, it has its charm,
but don't let it get over your head.
Another one, right?
The thing is... Sorry.
All that recycling stuff
is an invention from oil companies
so we don't think about the true problem.
What's the true problem here?
Their fucking business!
So they launch campaigns
to convince citizens
that change is in their hands
and they make us believe things...
For example, sorting out your trash,
which has no environmental effect.
Absolutely no environmental effect.
And meanwhile they're off scot-free.
With their oil rigs,
their car industry, etcetera.
Shell did campaigns...
in the nineties!
Where the message was
"Don't forget to turn off your lights"!
The nerve.
Bastards. I'm not recycling any more.
That's what I'm saying!
I have another.
- Let's hear it.
- This one's heavy.
I saw this documentary where they said
there's loads of sunken ships in the sea
since World War One.
What do those boats carry?
Chemical weapons.
And even worse, nuclear weapons
and toxic residues
that the... Russians threw into the sea.
And do you know how long
it takes for that to... decompose?
- How long?
- A hundred years!
Now, it's happening now!
- Holy shit!
- Yeah.
- You know what'll happen then, right?
- What?
When the nuclear weapons
and everything else decomposes,
it's going to pollute the sea.
No more eating fish,
no more swimming in the sea.
It's going to kill off the food chain!
Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck.
There seems to be expeditions
trying to get it out
and clean the seas, but there's no time.
We should go to a place I know...
- To buy fish!
- And freeze it.
And freeze it.
I've been thinking the same.
Exactly, so our kids can eat fish.
This thing you're telling me is a drama!
It is. Forget about global warming.
This here.
- Forget about it.
- This is heavier.
This is super heavy!
We should be buying hake right now!
I know.
- Are you serious?
- Absolutely!
Hold on. You're drunk!
Next, please!
That change is amazing, right?
I mean, it's mind-blowing.
You bet. It's really tight.
Smell this, it smells great.
- Yeah.
- Doesn't it?
I mix this with marijuana without THC,
so it doesn't give you a high,
but it tastes great.
So its cig without tobacco which tastes
of marijuana but doesn't give you a high.
Exactly.
I'm not sure what to say.
It's the most depressing thing I've heard.
- I hate smoking.
- Right.
I hate it and I love it.
I get you completely.
When I came back to Spain I thought
people would smoke a lot, but it's
the opposite, nobody smokes anymore.
No. And they give you bad looks.
It's decadent.
Smoking now is a nineties thing.
Yeah, it's frowned upon.
Yes.
Since I'm an idiot, the healthier others
want to be, the more I want to smoke...
You have to smoke.
It's an act of resistance.
There's a shop here
that sells loose cigarettes.
Her name is Carmen.
She's eight and she plays the piano.
And I'll stop rambling on.
But, yeah, I'm a nanny,
a translator, and the other thing...
If I get it, I'll tell you.
If it doesn't, that's okay.
I'm sure you'll get it.
How can you not?
You don't even know what it is!
Have you seen yourself?
You exude light, strength...
Of course you're getting it.
You'll get anything you set your mind to.
I'm not sure.
No. Yes. Yeah, you are sure.
We'll see.
You haven't told me your name yet.
I'm not telling you my name.
- Do you know what just happened?
- What?
And it has nothing to do
with drinking or smoking.
What happened is
that I've fallen in love with you.
- What?
- And you've fallen in love with me.
And we should always be together.
What are you talking about? I'm married.
- What do you mean married?
- Not legally, but just the same.
Well, then you made a mistake.
It's okay, but you made a mistake.
- What?
- You've obviously made a mistake
marrying the other guy,
you've made a mistake.
- You're the one making a mistake here.
- No.
- I see it clearly.
- Well don't, because you're wrong.
- I see it in your face.
- What about my face?
I've been with my husband
for a very long time and I love him.
And you think you have the right
to talk about my face!
You have to explain it to him.
- Right, you do it.
- No, it has to be you.
Otherwise, you know what happens.
- What happens?
- You get a cancer, you said so yourself.
I didn't.
Yeah, you said people
who keep everything inside get cancer.
Pancreatic cancer, you said.
- I don't think so.
- You said whining was healthier.
- You're a bit annoying.
- You have no idea.
I can't stand artists!
- Maybe I'm not an artist.
- Yeah, you are, drinking at midday.
- Wanna know what I do?
- No!
- Wanna know my name?
- No, and stop following me.
I'm stopping here.
You're so annoying!
CHAPTER II
RAMONA'S BOYFRIEND IS NICO
What are you doing here?
I didn't want to go home alone.
I'll be right out.
You've smoked, haven't you?
No. Well, half a cigarette. Two drags.
- You don't have to hide it.
- If you didn't smell it, it didn't count.
- That's not true.
- For me it is.
Today has been excruciating.
Why's that?
I don't know, the place was packed,
and the new matre hasn't got a clue.
Shit.
Are you all right?
Yes.
Are you nervous about tomorrow?
No, I'm upset about the rapist.
And what else?
Nothing else.
Are you sure?
This morning I walked to where
the casting is to see how long it takes,
and one thing led to another
and I haven't done anything.
- Okay, you're nervous.
- Yeah, maybe.
- What the fuck?
- You scared me!
- I thought you weren't breathing.
- Shit.
- Why are you wearing that wig?
- What do you think?
- That you're blonde.
- But what do you think?
I think you're blonde.
Does it look natural?
Well, no.
If you didn't know it's a wig.
No.
- If you didn't know me.
- No way.
- Why not?
- Your eyebrows are too dark.
Besides, it's a bit shiny, it looks fake.
I think I could pass
as a natural blonde, perfectly.
You can be a natural girl with a wig.
That's it. That's what I'll be.
That way they'll at least remember me
and say,
"The one with the wig".
But why do you have to wear a wig?
Because I have grey hairs.
- I have never seen them!
- Because you don't look.
But they're there.
If they take a close-up
they'll see them all.
They're looking for a 25 to 30 years old.
That is, with no grey hairs.
And since there's no more information,
I'll do as I please.
That's great.
Au revoir, mon amour.
I'll go in for a sec
and I'll call you in, okay?
Sure. Hold on!
Is it too obvious this is a wig?
Don't worry about that.
You'll do great, you'll see.
Come in.
Guys, this is Ona.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hello.
How are you, Ona?
You can leave your stuff right there,
we'll start in a minute.
Okay.
- Hi, Ona.
- Hi.
I'm Bruno.
- The film's director.
- Great.
- You look so blonde.
- It's a wig.
I can see that.
- I can take it off.
- No way.
We love wigs.
All right, Ona.
So, ready whenever you are.
What kind of name is Ona?
Are you stupid?
It's Ona, that's it.
You're seeing this woman's eyes, right?
Are you seeing them?
- Go ahead.
- Yeah. Hi.
My name is Ona, I'm 30 years old... 31.
And these are my two profiles.
She's wonderful.
You're seeing her, right?
Okay, Ona, what are you going to do?
Well, since
you didn't send anything,
I've prepared two monologues.
One dramatic and one comical,
so you choose.
Good.
Well,
start with the drama.
Okay, it's a monologue from Annie Hall .
- Annie Hall?
- Yeah.
- Woody Allen's Annie Hall?
- Yeah.
Annie Hall doesn't have
dramatic monologues.
Well, it's inspired by Annie Hall.
- Dramatic?
- Yeah.
Perfect.
Perfect.
Whenever you're ready, please.
The most unfair,
the dirtiest, the most despicable,
low-life thing you've done to me,
and which you always do,
is making me feel unworthy of you
by birth.
Since my family is rich,
blonde and white,
I can't understand art, suffering
or the heightened feelings felt
by those who have suffered oppression,
racism, bullying at school
or the Holocaust.
That I have to say I'm sorry!
I almost feel like making up
another family, because mine
makes me cold-hearted,
superficial and stupid.
Stupid!
The stupid part is the worst.
It's a vicious circle.
When you're with someone
who thinks you are stupid,
you behave like a stupid person.
And you're stupider each day.
You feel like a piece of shit.
And you feel unworthy
of their attention and their love.
Although love... love...
I don't think I've ever had yours.
It's funny, because in the beginning
you were the one who didn't want
a serious relationship.
You wanted us to be free like the birds,
to have fun
while I spent my time reading books
so you wouldn't be ashamed of me
at your friend's dinner parties.
When I became what you wanted,
when I saw the light
and realized I can be happy without you,
you get a panic attack
and want me to be like I used to
and exclusively yours.
That person no longer exists.
That's it.
Well done.
Well done, bravo, I loved it.
Should I do the other one?
There's no need, the part is yours.
- What?
- Relax.
No, I'm relaxed.
But the part is hers.
- Can you do the comedy monologue?
- Yeah, sure.
Bruno, sit, let's watch the monologue.
Fine by me. Sorry.
Okay, whenever you're ready.
I've been with a lot of men, okay?
A whole lot of them!
Some of them were even perfect.
As perfect as they could be.
You know what problem I had
with the perfect ones?
This is pure drama.
They weren't my soulmate.
I listen to myself and can't believe it.
Do you believe it? I'm serious.
This idea from Disney movies,
from 19th century novels,
this completely ludicrous idea
I hadn't bought into for a second...
Because I was always wise
beyond my years and firmly grounded.
Well, that shitty idea, you came along
and put it into my head just to
leave me hanging a few hours later.
On top of that,
as if we didn't know better,
and to put us at the same level
of the legendary characters
from romantic love,
we decide not to exchange numbers,
addresses, family names,
nothing so we could find each other.
Nothing!
I'm the only member of my generation
obsessed with a guy
I can't stalk on Facebook.
Nothing. The love of your life
and poof, he vanishes.
That foolproof plan of reuniting
the following year
at the Vienna train station, so romantic,
so beautiful.
Until my grandma dies two days earlier,
I can't go and I spend my life thinking,
"I meet the man of my dreams,
my grandma dies
and I lose him!"
Later on I thought
he couldn't have been there either,
how would he be there from the US for
a teenage promise, it's stupid, childish!
And now you tell me
that you were there,
waiting for me like a fool,
that your life also sucks without me,
that you're married
and you have a kid!
Fuck.
You could have kept that quiet.
Well, welcome to the film, Ona.
You're hiring me because you like me.
Obviously!
You have to like me as an actress.
- It's the same thing.
- Just a second.
We can't make a decision just like that.
If you don't mind, I'm still the director
and I'd like to choose the actress.
Can we see them all first?
You had decided before I even began.
Don't you want the lead?
Yeah, but because I'm a good actress.
- Stop saying that.
- Ona, please wait outside.
We'll finish seeing them all.
She's the lead and that's it!
I say so!
I won't be the lead
or anything else in this film!
I still don't get it.
The director is that guy
who told me he was in love with me.
At the casting?
- I'll start all over.
- You're no good explaining yourself.
Yesterday I went into a bar
next to the casting place
and started chatting with a nice guy
who suddenly said
he'd fallen in love with me.
I told him I was married.
Well, that's the director.
- What a coincidence.
- Yeah.
Roco told me later
he's a regular at that bar
because he lives nearby.
The thing is that,
when I arrived at the casting,
he starts telling everyone about my eyes,
I couldn't believe it.
That's the process
for choosing an actress, right?
- I don't think so.
- It is a bit, but go on.
- When I finished the first monologue...
- Yeah.
...he says he wants me
to be in his movie,
the lead, and all the others were saying
they should see more actresses.
But the guy was adamant it had
to be me, so I told them
to forget me, I don't want it.
- What?
- One pomegranate or two?
Excuse me?
- One pomegranate or two?
- No. You said what?
I said forget me,
I'm not doing that film.
That guy is crazy.
- The director?
- Yeah.
- He's crazy?
- The guy who wants you as lead?
Yeah. He was infatuated with me
before the casting.
You're a fool.
He was being fucking annoying.
- Unbelievable.
- I thought so too.
No, you're unbelievable!
- Why?
- How could you say no?
Because he said he was in love with me!
So what? I mean, don't sleep with him,
but you think this will happen twice?
Having a real director
wanting you as their lead?
He's only made a documentary
and some shorts, it's his first feature.
Okay, then it's all right.
- Shit, I'm an asshole.
- You're an asshole.
- What should I do now?
- I don't know, call, say yes.
I'm sure they've already got
someone else.
Call him first thing tomorrow.
He won't have fallen in love again.
You can't imagine.
I don't know if it's the onion
making me cry or being an asshole.
You are an asshole.
Fuck, we should be out celebrating,
not eating round sandwiches
made with an antique contraption.
I love your round sandwiches!
But let's open some wine, okay?
Of course.
- I'll go on a diet tomorrow for the film.
- Sure you will.
I'm over 30 years old
I never tell the truth
Only half-lies
And our thing was one of those
They can't take that away from us
They can't take that away from us!
That's it!
We never talk about anything
And if we do, it's even worse
You're going to kick me out
Or maybe I should get rid of you
They can't take that away from us
They can't take that away from us
Let's toast to the future
Good luck and Godspeed
I'm a tough guy once more
What did I do to you?
- Yeah?
- You're home, right?
Shit, it's almost 3 am.
Please come down and get me.
No way, I'm sleeping.
- Please.
- No!
I'm not coming down.
At least open the door, turn on the lights
and shout that you're
waiting for me with a knife.
You're nuts.
I can't go in otherwise
What now?
Here I am.
- Don't move!
- No.
I'm waiting for you, with a knife.
You reek of smoke.
It's been great! I love you, thank you.
CHAPTER III
THE REHEARSALS
Here?
Yeah, in the middle,
that's it, right there.
Okay. Are you recording?
I thought you just wanted to talk.
Well, what I like about actors is what
you see despite their technique.
Okay, but now I'm me, not the character.
Exactly.
Let's see.
Look into the camera for a sec.
That's it.
There you are.
Good.
I wasn't too sure, but the plan was
taking a gap year,
which is what we do in England,
and go to Australia
with a friend to work.
Cool.
And the money we earned
would help us travel in South America
the other six months.
But that summer...
my parents died and...
Both?
- Yeah.
- Jesus, I'm sorry.
- In a car accident.
- Fuck me.
Yeah. So then...
So everything got put on hold
and I can't quite remember
what I did first.
I started something, then
something else and it went nowhere.
- Did you finish your studies?
- No.
I mean...
I also had a stint as a singer.
- You don't sing anymore?
- No.
- That's a shame.
- Well...
Well.
I've always been impulsive
and scatter-brained.
That's a good thing.
Yeah. But no. 'Cause...
I flit from one thing to another
and never go forward.
Right now I'm trying to focus on acting
so I can finally do
one thing well.
If you have several talents,
you can't bury them.
Yes, I can. I can.
Yeah, this way
I put all my energy into one thing
and that thing works out.
Then why did you study translation?
It's completely unrelated.
Because I had a lot of work and I thought
getting the degree would make it easier.
The truth is it didn't matter.
I had a lot of work so I left it.
I still translate for a magazine,
it's really good.
What else do you want to do?
- In life?
- Yeah, in life.
Act.
Besides.
I want to have a lot of kids.
I want a beautiful garden,
like the ones in London,
where foxes come to see you.
And I want to smoke
a packet a day and be very thin.
Sounds good.
That's my plan.
Do you know a Bob Dylan song
called "To Ramona"?
Of course I do, I love it.
My parents loved it so much
that's why they called me that.
I think it's a beautiful name, Ramona.
Yeah, sure.
I'm going to call your character Ramona,
forget about Ona.
You're unbelievable.
- What's that Ona business?
- You're a nightmare!
It was a whim of mine.
We were doing great in London.
Nico was in charge of the kitchen
for three restaurants.
I was in a theatre company
and we worked non-stop.
It was great.
And then what?
Well...
Here, I look around and...
We used to come over for the holidays,
we lived here as kids.
It felt like
we never had parents in London.
But over here...
I get to see the sun more often.
We met when he was doing
an Erasmus in London
and I was still at school.
So we know each other since I was 17.
What is he like?
He's a chef.
Well, he studied architecture
but he loves cooking and...
I don't know.
I don't know why talking about him...
I'd rather not.
You have no idea
what living with a chef is like.
- I don't.
- No. It's horrible.
It's cool, because he cooks
some amazing dishes,
but when I want to go on a diet
he comes up with something like
meatballs with caramel sauce.
Seriously, this happened the other day.
I got home thinking, "Great.
I'm starting the film.
Tonight I'll have a salad,
tomorrow chicken and vegetables."
I open the fridge and what do I find?
Meatballs.
What are you doing here?
I came to see you.
I can see that. But why now?
I wanted to tell you something.
Okay, then tell me,
this is a bad time.
I love you.
I love you too.
I know, but I'm in love with you.
Weren't you angry?
Sorry?
When you see him.
You see him and you're annoyed.
But suddenly you're not.
Yeah, but he just said he loves me.
You already knew that.
When someone stands in front of you
and tells you they love you,
you stop being annoyed.
But did you feel angry
when you saw him?
I felt angry because I didn't want
to see him. I'm not mad at him.
Okay.
But did you really get angry, there?
I thought you wanted me
to take it in that direction.
No, I don't want you to take it
in any direction.
If you get angry when you see him,
then you get angry.
But don't appear annoyed if you're not.
Let the scene lead you.
- Okay.
- All right?
From the top?
- Sure.
- No. Hold on a second.
I need to know where I'm going.
When I see him come in, don't I know
for sure then and there it's him?
I think you don't want
to admit it, but you know it.
That can make me angry.
It can make you angry
or it can make you laugh.
You'll see what happens.
Let's see.
When I tell him to stay at the end,
even if the film stops there,
I need to know what's going to happen.
Well, I don't know.
We'll see.
You should know, it's your film.
No.
We're making it
to see what happens.
You're asking me to live through this
without knowing the result.
And you do shit all.
No.
No.
I'll point the camera.
If you don't have an agent,
you won't find out about castings.
I found out about yours through Roco,
she's Nico's cousin.
Castings are shit.
This is me.
Well, you did a casting.
Well, I was forced to.
But a casting is done in a bar,
drinking wine, talking about life.
Yeah, well...
If I saw that guy on my own,
I'd die on the spot.
Okay. Then I'll go first, okay?
Give me the keys.
Come on.
Which one is it?
It's the third floor.
It's that door.
Here.
Ramona...
What?
Tomorrow we start rehearsing at 8.
I know.
Listen...
Learn your lines, okay?
- Sure.
- Sure.
Stop it.
That's it, right?
Good morning. Good morning!
Good morning everyone.
This is Isa.
- You're a bit late.
- I know.
There's coffee!
Yeah, there's coffee.
Would you like a coffee, Isa?
No Bailey's, please.
- I'll get you some.
- Thanks!
Take a seat, please.
All right. Jesus.
Okay.
Why don't we leave
the rehearsal for tomorrow?
No, no way.
What are you saying? No way.
I've found our Lola!
Isa is Lola.
She's Lola! She's a great actress
with an incredible accent.
- Does Ignacio know about this?
- Fucking forget about Ignacio!
I'm the director. At least I think I am.
I'm just asking.
- Did you two meet last night?
- No.
We've known each other for years,
yesterday we bumped into each other.
Okay.
- The coffee?
- Here you go.
- And I'm leaving.
- Sure. Thanks.
Thanks.
Sorry.
Okay, let's get started.
Isa and I have talked a lot
about the character...
It can't have been that much.
- Just one night.
- Well...
A lot can be said in one night.
- I see.
- Yeah.
In the end it's going to be
a much younger Lola
than I was imagining.
But, whatever, it is what it is.
So...
- Since I don't want...
- I'm leaving.
Why is that?
I forgot I had something to do.
Really?
Okay, we'll rehearse without you today
if we have to,
you'll be back tomorrow, right?
The thing is,
I won't be able to do the film.
Really?
- Bruno, let her go.
- No, hey, listen.
Okay! Good bye.
- Bye!
- Good bye.
Ona, good bye.
CHAPTER IV:
THE LION'S DEN
Where did your sister get that?
Amsterdam, she had a layover.
Where is she now?
In Sudan.
- Why do you smoke that shit?
- It doesn't have nicotine,
it's like smoking air.
So why smoke it?
Because I like to expel smoke.
So, what's new about the movie?
What do you mean?
The money.
Did they get the funds they needed?
I have no idea.
I was thinking I'm not sure
I want to do the movie.
Come on, put that out.
- It smells like a joint.
- It's not.
I can assure you.
I was thinking,
since I have so little to go,
why don't I finish
my degree in translation?
What for?
To have a well-paid job.
At the UN they pay big bucks.
- What for?
- What do you mean?
- You've never cared about money.
- You grow up.
- You know?
- Sure.
And I don't want to live in Lavapis.
You were the one
who wanted to live here.
But now I want to live
in the Barrio de Salamanca.
Yeah, right.
In front of an embassy
with guards at the door.
- And strut around bejeweled.
- Maybe I do.
They're going to evict
the guys downstairs.
- Let's move now, please.
- This apartment is a bargain.
We won't find anything as cool
for this price.
I don't care if it's less cool.
If this keeps up,
we'll look around in a few months.
Here we go again.
By the way, it's Torru's party.
- Do you want to go?
- Of course.
Tell Roco to come.
- And I'll wear my heels.
- Sure.
- Why don't you take flamenco classes?
- I hadn't thought about it.
Halfway through the year?
Is she fascinated with you,
copying your style, to see if it sticks?
- No. I don't fascinate her.
- Okay.
So it's the opposite,
she doesn't like you,
she doesn't know why you're cool
and she copies your style.
It's just like that.
My cousin is like that.
She gets outraged by everything I do,
everything I say, and everything I wear.
She's a type 2 then.
Can I get some ice, please?
- Sure!
- Oh, sure, yeah.
What are you smoking?
Some shitty weeds
without nicotine or anything.
It smells great, like beedies.
- Like what?
- Beedies.
It's what they smoke in India.
That sounds cool.
But no idea, I've never been there.
- Can I roll one?
- Sure, here.
- There you go.
- Cool, thanks.
You're welcome.
- How are you?
- Hi!
- What's up?
- You look great!
Oh my God, you're almost there!
Almost.
- How are you?
- You look fantastic.
- So good.
- Yeah.
So, how's everything?
- Great, here we are.
- Bumpless.
Why don't you join us? If we
do it all together, it'll be more fun.
- Like us.
- That's true.
Don't be pushy,
maybe they don't want to have children.
- I'm not sure.
- I do, I want lots.
You'd better get started,
over 35 things get harder.
- More complicated.
- Yeah.
Wanna go to The Lion's Den?
- What's that?
- Girl, it's a legendary club.
- How would I know?
- She's half foreigner.
I'm up for anything
that gets us out of here.
Let's go then.
- Yeah. Right?
- Come on.
- I'll tell my buddy and we'll go.
- Okay.
Do you like the hippy?
I like him a lot.
- Okay, then I'll tell Nico and we'll go.
- Go.
Great.
- What was your name?
- Juan.
Juan, that's it.
Wanna come to The Lion's Den?
Okay.
Perfect.
- How is it going?
- Great. We're going to The Lion's Den.
- Where?
- The Lion's Den.
To dance!
I have to be at work tomorrow
at 12, but you can go.
I know.
What is it?
Then bye.
Bye.
Tell me the truth.
I have!
You two got together.
We didn't.
I don't know why you say that!
I won't tell anyone.
No, that guy's annoying,
I don't like him one bit.
Okay.
I knew you wouldn't answer.
What I really wanted
was to leave you a message.
I've seen Roco and she told me
you still don't have an actress
because you said I'm coming back.
I'm calling to say I have no intention
of coming back
and it has nothing to do with you.
It's because I don't want to.
Understood?
I'm sick of all these emotions
flying around,
all these feelings,
I just want a normal job!
And I want it now!
Because I have to have kids!
How can I bring kids
into this world like this?
With this chaos?
How am I going to have kids
if I don't have parents,
how will I take care of them?
I'll take care of them!
I'll teach them, I'll protect them.
And if the world ends,
I'll see what I can do.
If there's nuclear war or whatever,
we'll go to the middle of nowhere
and survive hunting.
Listen.
Today I met a health freak
and I told him recycling is a scam.
He said, "What are you talking about?"
So I insisted, "Yeah, it's a scam.
We're being tricked,
don't be a sheeple."
He looked at me in disgust,
and said he worked
for the committee for...
Mason, I've finished.
Bye!
- Hi.
- Hi.
Do you want to come in?
All right.
Nico's about to get here, but...
You have a beautiful house.
Thank you. Yeah.
We'll be moving soon. I hope.
Because of the squatters?
Yeah.
That's a shame.
Not for me, truth be told.
How are you?
You have to come back to the film.
- Yeah, it's just...
- Let me talk.
Let me talk. I spoke with Roco.
I was sure you'd come back
but she said you were thinking it over.
In the end...
I'm sorry about the other day.
But let me speak.
Then decide whatever you want.
This movie, all the work we've done,
not just us, but everybody,
centers on you being the lead.
If it's not you, we won't do it.
We'll make another movie, not this one.
And I want to make this movie.
We all want to make it.
We're ready to start.
We're waiting for you.
You can't let us out in the dark.
You can't not do it.
It's going to be beautiful.
- I know, but...
- And you owe it to yourself.
Let me think about it, okay?
There's nothing to think.
I won't be a problem, really.
I'll keep my distance,
we're just making a movie.
Trust me.
And forgive me.
Shit!
- Wow.
- The iron!
- The chef's jacket!
- Let me see.
No! Let me see.
- You're good at ironing.
- Please.
- This comes out with soap?
- Sure.
- This is beyond repair.
- Hi.
What's up?
What's up?
- Hi, I'm Nico.
- Bruno.
- At last, I've heard so much about you.
- So have I.
- Me too.
- What happened?
I had... I burnt your jacket.
It's okay.
- I'm really sorry.
- No problem, I have more.
Ona told me about
the film, it sucks.
- What sucks?
- The money thing.
But it's already fixed.
- Really?
- Yeah.
That's great. When do you start?
- Soon.
- Really?
- Right away.
- Congratulations.
Yeah, we're exhilarated,
that's why I came to tell Ramona.
You call her Ramona?
Yeah, yes.
He can call you that?
He doesn't pay any attention to me.
I'll go for a quick change of clothes
and let's go celebrate.
Okay.
Although I have to leave,
they're expecting me.
- Too bad.
- Yeah.
- Another day, then.
- Sure.
- Lovely to meet you.
- Same here.
Well, come on, go.
CHAPTER V:
THE FILM AND LIFE
Come in!
What are you doing here?
I came to see you.
Right.
I can see that. But why now?
To tell you something.
All right. Tell me and leave,
this isn't a good time.
I love you.
I love you too.
I know, but I'm in love with you.
Len,
you deserve someone
better than me, someone...
purer, more innocent.
I love you.
Okay, but right now it can't be.
I brought you flowers.
Well, take them away.
I'm waiting for someone important.
If you're in love with me we can talk
tomorrow or at another time.
But now leave, okay?
Ramona...
it's me.
I know it's you.
I know. But...
But now please leave
Len.
Cut!
- Is that good for you?
- Yeah.
- Fine by me.
- Everything okay?
Yeah?
People, it's a wrap.
Why aren't you ready?
What are you doing here?
What do you mean?
It's the wrap party.
- Hi.
- I forgot.
- Hi.
- I completely forgot.
I don't believe you.
Believe me.
Can't someone take your place?
No, I don't think so.
You have to come,
it's the wrap party.
Go without me.
Please, ask Andrea or someone
to sub you.
It's better if you go alone.
- What?
- It's better if you go alone.
What do you mean?
What do you think I mean?
I didn't want to talk earlier
so you wouldn't lose your concentration.
Talk about what?
Don't we have to talk
before going to any party?
About what?
This isn't the time, either.
Well, it's the only time.
You've fallen in love.
What are you saying? No way.
No way!
Don't you think
something has happened to you?
Yeah, loads of stuff, but not that.
Not that. Not that.
Come on. Go to your party.
We'll talk tomorrow. I have to work.
What are you going to do?
Yes, hello. Hi.
Sorry, just a sec,
I know you've had enough
of me being a bore, tonight I won't.
For the time being.
I don't know if you know this,
but a long time ago
Ramona sang in a band
in London.
Yeah.
So, please...
- Please.
- No.
- Really.
- Please!
No.
Come and sing for us.
There's no getting out.
I carved out my name on your boat
I became a seawoman for you
So I could sail the seas
Steering through desires
I was so happy in your arms
I was so happy in your harbor
That my heart was made prisoner
Of your body and your skin
Like a wave your love reached my life
Like a wave of fires and caresses
Of white seafoam and shell rumors
Like a wave
I was tied up forever to your storm
I lost my bearings without realizing
Like a wave
Your love grew like a wave
Are you okay?
Nico has said we have to talk.
Of course.
- The film is over.
- I know.
I never thought it would be over.
And now what?
I don't know.
- It's not so easy.
- Yeah, it is.
Okay.
You act on impulse,
so you think it's easy.
But you can't go around like that.
Yes you can.
Right now, for example.
I have to tell you how I feel
or I'm going to die.
Could you be a little less dramatic?
It is dramatic!
Even more for you!
Because you have to do something.
I don't have to do a thing.
Just wait for you.
How can you be
so sure?
Because when you're near
I feel peace.
I feel everything's fine,
everything will turn out right.
Even though
we're always three feet apart.
Well...
Sometimes it's less.
- Who cares.
- And I see you look at me.
And many times I know you know
I'm looking at you,
and you're also happy when I'm near,
because I understand you
better than others.
You know
you can do whatever you want
because I'm looking at you
and I like you all the same.
And I love you all the same.
I always love you.
Even when you forget
your lines or whatever.
And it's not impulsive.
You and I can't be together.
Why?
Because we'd be useless in life,
it would be too chaotic.
We've just made a movie together!
- What else do you want to do?
- Things.
In life you have to do things
besides a movie!
Where are we going?
I'm going home.
You, I don't know.
- I don't know what to do.
- I'd rather you didn't follow me.
It's frustrating, right?
Because you've been following me.
Now it's my turn.
What do you want?
I don't know.
I can't make promises,
as if we were a couple of teenagers.
Everything can go wrong.
Okay.
- But don't get mad.
- Yes, I'm mad.
I'm mad.
What do you want?
I can't lie to him.
- You're already doing it.
- That's not true.
You're such a coward.
I'm not a coward.
You think this is someone else's life
or that this is a movie?
If someone has it right in front of them,
they can't let it go by.
That's like denying life.
CHAPTER VI:
THE END
Hi, I'm Ramona,
I'm 32 and these are my profiles.
Okay. When you're ready.
I saw you from my window yesterday.
I saw you looking at her.
Sorry. It's just that...
Getting so much into the emotions
has muddled me up.
I'll do a different text. Okay?
- Okay.
- Here I go.
I can't believe it, man.
I can't believe it when people say,
"So, you're an orphan?"
When it's crystal clear
that everything I do say or feel in life
is determined by that.
It's tattooed on my forehead.
I'm an orphan!
Do you think I'd be here if I wasn't?
No. No!
My life would be different. So would I,
and none of this would be happening.
If you're not an orphan,
you have no idea.
No idea.
That's the biggest abandonment there is.
"Hey, I was there but I'm not any longer!
Now you take care of everything alone.
And you have to be happy
and smile.
And enjoy life, since you're not dead."
Sometimes I dream I get home
and find my parents
in the living room,
as if nothing had happened.
At first I feel...
I feel relief and happiness
at them being alive, at the joke.
Of course it was a joke,
I knew it had to be.
Then I tell them,
"Where were you?"
Then they laugh at me.
I don't understand and say,
"How could you do this to me?"
And...
I don't understand anything.
And I start feeling a rage towards them.
My rage is so big I wake up
and they die again.
I had them, and then I lose them again.
And that's it.
I can't abandon someone who loves me.
Don't you get it?
Hi.
Hi.
Ignacio told me
to bring these papers over.
Come in.
Ignacio isn't here,
but you can leave them...
Sure, here.
- How is the editing going?
- Good.
Well,
you can imagine.
With so many doubts.
My mom used to say
a doubt means a no.
- A doubt is a no?
- A yes is absolutely clear.
Did you know I'm singing
with a band of twenty somethings?
Fuck me, that's great!
- It's really cool.
- That's cool.
I have to get to the movies, I'm late.
Of course. I hope you enjoy the film.
Thank you.
Well...
- See you.
- Bye.
- There's no one here.
- Yeah.
We're early.
- What should we do?
- I'm going to the bathroom.
Okay, I'm going to smoke.
All right. I'll wait for you outside.
TO MY FATHER
Dad?
I'll be right up!
CHAPTER 1:
RAMONA MET BRUNO
Hi.
A coffee, please.
Thank you.
Sorry.
What did you add to your juice?
This?
Some concoction
they sold me at the drugstore.
It's for anxiety, it's supposed to be
all natural and relaxing, who knows?
CBD.
- CB What?
- CBD.
They extract it from marijuana,
it doesn't give you a high, just relaxes,
eases pain, and all sorts of miracles.
I don't think so. It doesn't say
anything about marijuana here.
I'm not completely sure
it's legal in Spain,
so they might have left it out.
Wanna try?
Supposedly all plants, nothing illegal.
Okay.
That's enough.
Thanks.
Do you have anxiety too?
Me? Over the top.
- Just like everyone else.
- No.
Not everyone has anxiety.
In cities they do.
Maybe in the country they don't.
If I take a look around,
it's unbelievable.
People have mind-boggling jobs.
Jobs where they fire people non-stop.
Those people exist.
I'm not judging, I understand
we all have a role to play.
But some spend their days firing people.
Or evicting or whatever.
And they're cool as a cucumber.
As a cucumber! If I get into
an argument with my brother,
I lose it.
Yeah, but those people you're
talking about keep it inside
and then get pancreatic cancer
or whatever.
- You think so?
- Sure.
Whining is so much better.
So much healthier.
Why do you have anxiety.
I'm sorry,
but you don't look anxious at all.
- Because I live in Lavapies...
- I used to live there.
- Years and years.
- It's nice, but I hate it.
Why?
Because in my building there's been
a narco house for quite a while.
And now they've also occupied
the third floor.
So my hallway is full of junkies.
You live in an eighties movie.
On top of that, yesterday
a six-foot-five dude
almost broke into the Airbnb
two Americans were staying at.
- A junkie?
- No, a rapist.
Junkies usually aren't dangerous.
No, not junkies, but rapists yes.
Don't you carry a mace spray?
I hadn't thought about that.
There's a Cortzar short story
where they occupy a house bit by bit
until the owner has to leave.
I don't even want to hear it.
- That's what it looks like!
- 'Cause paranoia...
Right. But it's good film material.
No. Forget it.
Hey, do you notice anything?
What?
- The concoction.
- No.
There's no concoction for my anxiety.
I need hard drugs.
Then let's order
a shot of something with our coffee.
Well, I have an excuse
with the Americans and all that, right?
Can I get a couple
of shots of brandy here, please?
In this same glass.
Anyway, this concoction thing
is a scam.
Almost anything they're selling
as eco-healthy-natural is a scam.
Yeah, I just don't get it.
I mean, these bars are almost extinct
Yeah, it's unbelievable.
Madrid's typical bars
have disappeared.
Now they're all the same
wherever you go in the world.
They're all franchises
or eco-hipster-trendy shit.
Eco!
Eco is the king of the prefixes!
- Eco-detergent.
- Eco-fuck.
Eco-coffee, eco-friend.
Eco is fucking it!
And I'll admit it works.
When I'm at the supermarket,
if in doubt, I always buy eco.
It could just as well say
"expensive" instead of eco.
- So that's...
- This is the greatest.
Are you kidding me?
Is that all real, everything,
the face, the clothes?
You bet it is.
This is the latest thing.
This is fashionable!
This guy has taken Spanish guile
to new heights,
he's pulling everyone's leg.
I know. For me the worst thing
is he's behaving all macho,
he wants to fuck them all,
but he's suddenly so sensitive.
"I'm so sensitive, leave me alone."
Those people are the worst.
Fuck me, it's no fucking wonder.
Let me see a few more.
And then my cousins, all of them
super feminists, are all in love with him.
Okay, yeah, his songs are cool,
but the lyrics... It makes no sense.
I've had it with all this shit.
- Fuck me.
- Okay, enough. You're not into phones.
"Life happens outside of a screen."
Do you know what I just realized?
You're truly antiestablishment.
Because my cousin... He's a rapper.
He thinks he's so antiestablishment,
and he has iPhone, Instagram,
the whole lot, but you don't.
Nobody can sell you anything!
And that's cool, right?
Well, it's a bit old-time,
because you're out of the loop, but...
Whatever.
Wow, I thought it was cool.
I mean, it has its charm,
but don't let it get over your head.
Another one, right?
The thing is... Sorry.
All that recycling stuff
is an invention from oil companies
so we don't think about the true problem.
What's the true problem here?
Their fucking business!
So they launch campaigns
to convince citizens
that change is in their hands
and they make us believe things...
For example, sorting out your trash,
which has no environmental effect.
Absolutely no environmental effect.
And meanwhile they're off scot-free.
With their oil rigs,
their car industry, etcetera.
Shell did campaigns...
in the nineties!
Where the message was
"Don't forget to turn off your lights"!
The nerve.
Bastards. I'm not recycling any more.
That's what I'm saying!
I have another.
- Let's hear it.
- This one's heavy.
I saw this documentary where they said
there's loads of sunken ships in the sea
since World War One.
What do those boats carry?
Chemical weapons.
And even worse, nuclear weapons
and toxic residues
that the... Russians threw into the sea.
And do you know how long
it takes for that to... decompose?
- How long?
- A hundred years!
Now, it's happening now!
- Holy shit!
- Yeah.
- You know what'll happen then, right?
- What?
When the nuclear weapons
and everything else decomposes,
it's going to pollute the sea.
No more eating fish,
no more swimming in the sea.
It's going to kill off the food chain!
Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck.
There seems to be expeditions
trying to get it out
and clean the seas, but there's no time.
We should go to a place I know...
- To buy fish!
- And freeze it.
And freeze it.
I've been thinking the same.
Exactly, so our kids can eat fish.
This thing you're telling me is a drama!
It is. Forget about global warming.
This here.
- Forget about it.
- This is heavier.
This is super heavy!
We should be buying hake right now!
I know.
- Are you serious?
- Absolutely!
Hold on. You're drunk!
Next, please!
That change is amazing, right?
I mean, it's mind-blowing.
You bet. It's really tight.
Smell this, it smells great.
- Yeah.
- Doesn't it?
I mix this with marijuana without THC,
so it doesn't give you a high,
but it tastes great.
So its cig without tobacco which tastes
of marijuana but doesn't give you a high.
Exactly.
I'm not sure what to say.
It's the most depressing thing I've heard.
- I hate smoking.
- Right.
I hate it and I love it.
I get you completely.
When I came back to Spain I thought
people would smoke a lot, but it's
the opposite, nobody smokes anymore.
No. And they give you bad looks.
It's decadent.
Smoking now is a nineties thing.
Yeah, it's frowned upon.
Yes.
Since I'm an idiot, the healthier others
want to be, the more I want to smoke...
You have to smoke.
It's an act of resistance.
There's a shop here
that sells loose cigarettes.
Her name is Carmen.
She's eight and she plays the piano.
And I'll stop rambling on.
But, yeah, I'm a nanny,
a translator, and the other thing...
If I get it, I'll tell you.
If it doesn't, that's okay.
I'm sure you'll get it.
How can you not?
You don't even know what it is!
Have you seen yourself?
You exude light, strength...
Of course you're getting it.
You'll get anything you set your mind to.
I'm not sure.
No. Yes. Yeah, you are sure.
We'll see.
You haven't told me your name yet.
I'm not telling you my name.
- Do you know what just happened?
- What?
And it has nothing to do
with drinking or smoking.
What happened is
that I've fallen in love with you.
- What?
- And you've fallen in love with me.
And we should always be together.
What are you talking about? I'm married.
- What do you mean married?
- Not legally, but just the same.
Well, then you made a mistake.
It's okay, but you made a mistake.
- What?
- You've obviously made a mistake
marrying the other guy,
you've made a mistake.
- You're the one making a mistake here.
- No.
- I see it clearly.
- Well don't, because you're wrong.
- I see it in your face.
- What about my face?
I've been with my husband
for a very long time and I love him.
And you think you have the right
to talk about my face!
You have to explain it to him.
- Right, you do it.
- No, it has to be you.
Otherwise, you know what happens.
- What happens?
- You get a cancer, you said so yourself.
I didn't.
Yeah, you said people
who keep everything inside get cancer.
Pancreatic cancer, you said.
- I don't think so.
- You said whining was healthier.
- You're a bit annoying.
- You have no idea.
I can't stand artists!
- Maybe I'm not an artist.
- Yeah, you are, drinking at midday.
- Wanna know what I do?
- No!
- Wanna know my name?
- No, and stop following me.
I'm stopping here.
You're so annoying!
CHAPTER II
RAMONA'S BOYFRIEND IS NICO
What are you doing here?
I didn't want to go home alone.
I'll be right out.
You've smoked, haven't you?
No. Well, half a cigarette. Two drags.
- You don't have to hide it.
- If you didn't smell it, it didn't count.
- That's not true.
- For me it is.
Today has been excruciating.
Why's that?
I don't know, the place was packed,
and the new matre hasn't got a clue.
Shit.
Are you all right?
Yes.
Are you nervous about tomorrow?
No, I'm upset about the rapist.
And what else?
Nothing else.
Are you sure?
This morning I walked to where
the casting is to see how long it takes,
and one thing led to another
and I haven't done anything.
- Okay, you're nervous.
- Yeah, maybe.
- What the fuck?
- You scared me!
- I thought you weren't breathing.
- Shit.
- Why are you wearing that wig?
- What do you think?
- That you're blonde.
- But what do you think?
I think you're blonde.
Does it look natural?
Well, no.
If you didn't know it's a wig.
No.
- If you didn't know me.
- No way.
- Why not?
- Your eyebrows are too dark.
Besides, it's a bit shiny, it looks fake.
I think I could pass
as a natural blonde, perfectly.
You can be a natural girl with a wig.
That's it. That's what I'll be.
That way they'll at least remember me
and say,
"The one with the wig".
But why do you have to wear a wig?
Because I have grey hairs.
- I have never seen them!
- Because you don't look.
But they're there.
If they take a close-up
they'll see them all.
They're looking for a 25 to 30 years old.
That is, with no grey hairs.
And since there's no more information,
I'll do as I please.
That's great.
Au revoir, mon amour.
I'll go in for a sec
and I'll call you in, okay?
Sure. Hold on!
Is it too obvious this is a wig?
Don't worry about that.
You'll do great, you'll see.
Come in.
Guys, this is Ona.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Hello.
How are you, Ona?
You can leave your stuff right there,
we'll start in a minute.
Okay.
- Hi, Ona.
- Hi.
I'm Bruno.
- The film's director.
- Great.
- You look so blonde.
- It's a wig.
I can see that.
- I can take it off.
- No way.
We love wigs.
All right, Ona.
So, ready whenever you are.
What kind of name is Ona?
Are you stupid?
It's Ona, that's it.
You're seeing this woman's eyes, right?
Are you seeing them?
- Go ahead.
- Yeah. Hi.
My name is Ona, I'm 30 years old... 31.
And these are my two profiles.
She's wonderful.
You're seeing her, right?
Okay, Ona, what are you going to do?
Well, since
you didn't send anything,
I've prepared two monologues.
One dramatic and one comical,
so you choose.
Good.
Well,
start with the drama.
Okay, it's a monologue from Annie Hall .
- Annie Hall?
- Yeah.
- Woody Allen's Annie Hall?
- Yeah.
Annie Hall doesn't have
dramatic monologues.
Well, it's inspired by Annie Hall.
- Dramatic?
- Yeah.
Perfect.
Perfect.
Whenever you're ready, please.
The most unfair,
the dirtiest, the most despicable,
low-life thing you've done to me,
and which you always do,
is making me feel unworthy of you
by birth.
Since my family is rich,
blonde and white,
I can't understand art, suffering
or the heightened feelings felt
by those who have suffered oppression,
racism, bullying at school
or the Holocaust.
That I have to say I'm sorry!
I almost feel like making up
another family, because mine
makes me cold-hearted,
superficial and stupid.
Stupid!
The stupid part is the worst.
It's a vicious circle.
When you're with someone
who thinks you are stupid,
you behave like a stupid person.
And you're stupider each day.
You feel like a piece of shit.
And you feel unworthy
of their attention and their love.
Although love... love...
I don't think I've ever had yours.
It's funny, because in the beginning
you were the one who didn't want
a serious relationship.
You wanted us to be free like the birds,
to have fun
while I spent my time reading books
so you wouldn't be ashamed of me
at your friend's dinner parties.
When I became what you wanted,
when I saw the light
and realized I can be happy without you,
you get a panic attack
and want me to be like I used to
and exclusively yours.
That person no longer exists.
That's it.
Well done.
Well done, bravo, I loved it.
Should I do the other one?
There's no need, the part is yours.
- What?
- Relax.
No, I'm relaxed.
But the part is hers.
- Can you do the comedy monologue?
- Yeah, sure.
Bruno, sit, let's watch the monologue.
Fine by me. Sorry.
Okay, whenever you're ready.
I've been with a lot of men, okay?
A whole lot of them!
Some of them were even perfect.
As perfect as they could be.
You know what problem I had
with the perfect ones?
This is pure drama.
They weren't my soulmate.
I listen to myself and can't believe it.
Do you believe it? I'm serious.
This idea from Disney movies,
from 19th century novels,
this completely ludicrous idea
I hadn't bought into for a second...
Because I was always wise
beyond my years and firmly grounded.
Well, that shitty idea, you came along
and put it into my head just to
leave me hanging a few hours later.
On top of that,
as if we didn't know better,
and to put us at the same level
of the legendary characters
from romantic love,
we decide not to exchange numbers,
addresses, family names,
nothing so we could find each other.
Nothing!
I'm the only member of my generation
obsessed with a guy
I can't stalk on Facebook.
Nothing. The love of your life
and poof, he vanishes.
That foolproof plan of reuniting
the following year
at the Vienna train station, so romantic,
so beautiful.
Until my grandma dies two days earlier,
I can't go and I spend my life thinking,
"I meet the man of my dreams,
my grandma dies
and I lose him!"
Later on I thought
he couldn't have been there either,
how would he be there from the US for
a teenage promise, it's stupid, childish!
And now you tell me
that you were there,
waiting for me like a fool,
that your life also sucks without me,
that you're married
and you have a kid!
Fuck.
You could have kept that quiet.
Well, welcome to the film, Ona.
You're hiring me because you like me.
Obviously!
You have to like me as an actress.
- It's the same thing.
- Just a second.
We can't make a decision just like that.
If you don't mind, I'm still the director
and I'd like to choose the actress.
Can we see them all first?
You had decided before I even began.
Don't you want the lead?
Yeah, but because I'm a good actress.
- Stop saying that.
- Ona, please wait outside.
We'll finish seeing them all.
She's the lead and that's it!
I say so!
I won't be the lead
or anything else in this film!
I still don't get it.
The director is that guy
who told me he was in love with me.
At the casting?
- I'll start all over.
- You're no good explaining yourself.
Yesterday I went into a bar
next to the casting place
and started chatting with a nice guy
who suddenly said
he'd fallen in love with me.
I told him I was married.
Well, that's the director.
- What a coincidence.
- Yeah.
Roco told me later
he's a regular at that bar
because he lives nearby.
The thing is that,
when I arrived at the casting,
he starts telling everyone about my eyes,
I couldn't believe it.
That's the process
for choosing an actress, right?
- I don't think so.
- It is a bit, but go on.
- When I finished the first monologue...
- Yeah.
...he says he wants me
to be in his movie,
the lead, and all the others were saying
they should see more actresses.
But the guy was adamant it had
to be me, so I told them
to forget me, I don't want it.
- What?
- One pomegranate or two?
Excuse me?
- One pomegranate or two?
- No. You said what?
I said forget me,
I'm not doing that film.
That guy is crazy.
- The director?
- Yeah.
- He's crazy?
- The guy who wants you as lead?
Yeah. He was infatuated with me
before the casting.
You're a fool.
He was being fucking annoying.
- Unbelievable.
- I thought so too.
No, you're unbelievable!
- Why?
- How could you say no?
Because he said he was in love with me!
So what? I mean, don't sleep with him,
but you think this will happen twice?
Having a real director
wanting you as their lead?
He's only made a documentary
and some shorts, it's his first feature.
Okay, then it's all right.
- Shit, I'm an asshole.
- You're an asshole.
- What should I do now?
- I don't know, call, say yes.
I'm sure they've already got
someone else.
Call him first thing tomorrow.
He won't have fallen in love again.
You can't imagine.
I don't know if it's the onion
making me cry or being an asshole.
You are an asshole.
Fuck, we should be out celebrating,
not eating round sandwiches
made with an antique contraption.
I love your round sandwiches!
But let's open some wine, okay?
Of course.
- I'll go on a diet tomorrow for the film.
- Sure you will.
I'm over 30 years old
I never tell the truth
Only half-lies
And our thing was one of those
They can't take that away from us
They can't take that away from us!
That's it!
We never talk about anything
And if we do, it's even worse
You're going to kick me out
Or maybe I should get rid of you
They can't take that away from us
They can't take that away from us
Let's toast to the future
Good luck and Godspeed
I'm a tough guy once more
What did I do to you?
- Yeah?
- You're home, right?
Shit, it's almost 3 am.
Please come down and get me.
No way, I'm sleeping.
- Please.
- No!
I'm not coming down.
At least open the door, turn on the lights
and shout that you're
waiting for me with a knife.
You're nuts.
I can't go in otherwise
What now?
Here I am.
- Don't move!
- No.
I'm waiting for you, with a knife.
You reek of smoke.
It's been great! I love you, thank you.
CHAPTER III
THE REHEARSALS
Here?
Yeah, in the middle,
that's it, right there.
Okay. Are you recording?
I thought you just wanted to talk.
Well, what I like about actors is what
you see despite their technique.
Okay, but now I'm me, not the character.
Exactly.
Let's see.
Look into the camera for a sec.
That's it.
There you are.
Good.
I wasn't too sure, but the plan was
taking a gap year,
which is what we do in England,
and go to Australia
with a friend to work.
Cool.
And the money we earned
would help us travel in South America
the other six months.
But that summer...
my parents died and...
Both?
- Yeah.
- Jesus, I'm sorry.
- In a car accident.
- Fuck me.
Yeah. So then...
So everything got put on hold
and I can't quite remember
what I did first.
I started something, then
something else and it went nowhere.
- Did you finish your studies?
- No.
I mean...
I also had a stint as a singer.
- You don't sing anymore?
- No.
- That's a shame.
- Well...
Well.
I've always been impulsive
and scatter-brained.
That's a good thing.
Yeah. But no. 'Cause...
I flit from one thing to another
and never go forward.
Right now I'm trying to focus on acting
so I can finally do
one thing well.
If you have several talents,
you can't bury them.
Yes, I can. I can.
Yeah, this way
I put all my energy into one thing
and that thing works out.
Then why did you study translation?
It's completely unrelated.
Because I had a lot of work and I thought
getting the degree would make it easier.
The truth is it didn't matter.
I had a lot of work so I left it.
I still translate for a magazine,
it's really good.
What else do you want to do?
- In life?
- Yeah, in life.
Act.
Besides.
I want to have a lot of kids.
I want a beautiful garden,
like the ones in London,
where foxes come to see you.
And I want to smoke
a packet a day and be very thin.
Sounds good.
That's my plan.
Do you know a Bob Dylan song
called "To Ramona"?
Of course I do, I love it.
My parents loved it so much
that's why they called me that.
I think it's a beautiful name, Ramona.
Yeah, sure.
I'm going to call your character Ramona,
forget about Ona.
You're unbelievable.
- What's that Ona business?
- You're a nightmare!
It was a whim of mine.
We were doing great in London.
Nico was in charge of the kitchen
for three restaurants.
I was in a theatre company
and we worked non-stop.
It was great.
And then what?
Well...
Here, I look around and...
We used to come over for the holidays,
we lived here as kids.
It felt like
we never had parents in London.
But over here...
I get to see the sun more often.
We met when he was doing
an Erasmus in London
and I was still at school.
So we know each other since I was 17.
What is he like?
He's a chef.
Well, he studied architecture
but he loves cooking and...
I don't know.
I don't know why talking about him...
I'd rather not.
You have no idea
what living with a chef is like.
- I don't.
- No. It's horrible.
It's cool, because he cooks
some amazing dishes,
but when I want to go on a diet
he comes up with something like
meatballs with caramel sauce.
Seriously, this happened the other day.
I got home thinking, "Great.
I'm starting the film.
Tonight I'll have a salad,
tomorrow chicken and vegetables."
I open the fridge and what do I find?
Meatballs.
What are you doing here?
I came to see you.
I can see that. But why now?
I wanted to tell you something.
Okay, then tell me,
this is a bad time.
I love you.
I love you too.
I know, but I'm in love with you.
Weren't you angry?
Sorry?
When you see him.
You see him and you're annoyed.
But suddenly you're not.
Yeah, but he just said he loves me.
You already knew that.
When someone stands in front of you
and tells you they love you,
you stop being annoyed.
But did you feel angry
when you saw him?
I felt angry because I didn't want
to see him. I'm not mad at him.
Okay.
But did you really get angry, there?
I thought you wanted me
to take it in that direction.
No, I don't want you to take it
in any direction.
If you get angry when you see him,
then you get angry.
But don't appear annoyed if you're not.
Let the scene lead you.
- Okay.
- All right?
From the top?
- Sure.
- No. Hold on a second.
I need to know where I'm going.
When I see him come in, don't I know
for sure then and there it's him?
I think you don't want
to admit it, but you know it.
That can make me angry.
It can make you angry
or it can make you laugh.
You'll see what happens.
Let's see.
When I tell him to stay at the end,
even if the film stops there,
I need to know what's going to happen.
Well, I don't know.
We'll see.
You should know, it's your film.
No.
We're making it
to see what happens.
You're asking me to live through this
without knowing the result.
And you do shit all.
No.
No.
I'll point the camera.
If you don't have an agent,
you won't find out about castings.
I found out about yours through Roco,
she's Nico's cousin.
Castings are shit.
This is me.
Well, you did a casting.
Well, I was forced to.
But a casting is done in a bar,
drinking wine, talking about life.
Yeah, well...
If I saw that guy on my own,
I'd die on the spot.
Okay. Then I'll go first, okay?
Give me the keys.
Come on.
Which one is it?
It's the third floor.
It's that door.
Here.
Ramona...
What?
Tomorrow we start rehearsing at 8.
I know.
Listen...
Learn your lines, okay?
- Sure.
- Sure.
Stop it.
That's it, right?
Good morning. Good morning!
Good morning everyone.
This is Isa.
- You're a bit late.
- I know.
There's coffee!
Yeah, there's coffee.
Would you like a coffee, Isa?
No Bailey's, please.
- I'll get you some.
- Thanks!
Take a seat, please.
All right. Jesus.
Okay.
Why don't we leave
the rehearsal for tomorrow?
No, no way.
What are you saying? No way.
I've found our Lola!
Isa is Lola.
She's Lola! She's a great actress
with an incredible accent.
- Does Ignacio know about this?
- Fucking forget about Ignacio!
I'm the director. At least I think I am.
I'm just asking.
- Did you two meet last night?
- No.
We've known each other for years,
yesterday we bumped into each other.
Okay.
- The coffee?
- Here you go.
- And I'm leaving.
- Sure. Thanks.
Thanks.
Sorry.
Okay, let's get started.
Isa and I have talked a lot
about the character...
It can't have been that much.
- Just one night.
- Well...
A lot can be said in one night.
- I see.
- Yeah.
In the end it's going to be
a much younger Lola
than I was imagining.
But, whatever, it is what it is.
So...
- Since I don't want...
- I'm leaving.
Why is that?
I forgot I had something to do.
Really?
Okay, we'll rehearse without you today
if we have to,
you'll be back tomorrow, right?
The thing is,
I won't be able to do the film.
Really?
- Bruno, let her go.
- No, hey, listen.
Okay! Good bye.
- Bye!
- Good bye.
Ona, good bye.
CHAPTER IV:
THE LION'S DEN
Where did your sister get that?
Amsterdam, she had a layover.
Where is she now?
In Sudan.
- Why do you smoke that shit?
- It doesn't have nicotine,
it's like smoking air.
So why smoke it?
Because I like to expel smoke.
So, what's new about the movie?
What do you mean?
The money.
Did they get the funds they needed?
I have no idea.
I was thinking I'm not sure
I want to do the movie.
Come on, put that out.
- It smells like a joint.
- It's not.
I can assure you.
I was thinking,
since I have so little to go,
why don't I finish
my degree in translation?
What for?
To have a well-paid job.
At the UN they pay big bucks.
- What for?
- What do you mean?
- You've never cared about money.
- You grow up.
- You know?
- Sure.
And I don't want to live in Lavapis.
You were the one
who wanted to live here.
But now I want to live
in the Barrio de Salamanca.
Yeah, right.
In front of an embassy
with guards at the door.
- And strut around bejeweled.
- Maybe I do.
They're going to evict
the guys downstairs.
- Let's move now, please.
- This apartment is a bargain.
We won't find anything as cool
for this price.
I don't care if it's less cool.
If this keeps up,
we'll look around in a few months.
Here we go again.
By the way, it's Torru's party.
- Do you want to go?
- Of course.
Tell Roco to come.
- And I'll wear my heels.
- Sure.
- Why don't you take flamenco classes?
- I hadn't thought about it.
Halfway through the year?
Is she fascinated with you,
copying your style, to see if it sticks?
- No. I don't fascinate her.
- Okay.
So it's the opposite,
she doesn't like you,
she doesn't know why you're cool
and she copies your style.
It's just like that.
My cousin is like that.
She gets outraged by everything I do,
everything I say, and everything I wear.
She's a type 2 then.
Can I get some ice, please?
- Sure!
- Oh, sure, yeah.
What are you smoking?
Some shitty weeds
without nicotine or anything.
It smells great, like beedies.
- Like what?
- Beedies.
It's what they smoke in India.
That sounds cool.
But no idea, I've never been there.
- Can I roll one?
- Sure, here.
- There you go.
- Cool, thanks.
You're welcome.
- How are you?
- Hi!
- What's up?
- You look great!
Oh my God, you're almost there!
Almost.
- How are you?
- You look fantastic.
- So good.
- Yeah.
So, how's everything?
- Great, here we are.
- Bumpless.
Why don't you join us? If we
do it all together, it'll be more fun.
- Like us.
- That's true.
Don't be pushy,
maybe they don't want to have children.
- I'm not sure.
- I do, I want lots.
You'd better get started,
over 35 things get harder.
- More complicated.
- Yeah.
Wanna go to The Lion's Den?
- What's that?
- Girl, it's a legendary club.
- How would I know?
- She's half foreigner.
I'm up for anything
that gets us out of here.
Let's go then.
- Yeah. Right?
- Come on.
- I'll tell my buddy and we'll go.
- Okay.
Do you like the hippy?
I like him a lot.
- Okay, then I'll tell Nico and we'll go.
- Go.
Great.
- What was your name?
- Juan.
Juan, that's it.
Wanna come to The Lion's Den?
Okay.
Perfect.
- How is it going?
- Great. We're going to The Lion's Den.
- Where?
- The Lion's Den.
To dance!
I have to be at work tomorrow
at 12, but you can go.
I know.
What is it?
Then bye.
Bye.
Tell me the truth.
I have!
You two got together.
We didn't.
I don't know why you say that!
I won't tell anyone.
No, that guy's annoying,
I don't like him one bit.
Okay.
I knew you wouldn't answer.
What I really wanted
was to leave you a message.
I've seen Roco and she told me
you still don't have an actress
because you said I'm coming back.
I'm calling to say I have no intention
of coming back
and it has nothing to do with you.
It's because I don't want to.
Understood?
I'm sick of all these emotions
flying around,
all these feelings,
I just want a normal job!
And I want it now!
Because I have to have kids!
How can I bring kids
into this world like this?
With this chaos?
How am I going to have kids
if I don't have parents,
how will I take care of them?
I'll take care of them!
I'll teach them, I'll protect them.
And if the world ends,
I'll see what I can do.
If there's nuclear war or whatever,
we'll go to the middle of nowhere
and survive hunting.
Listen.
Today I met a health freak
and I told him recycling is a scam.
He said, "What are you talking about?"
So I insisted, "Yeah, it's a scam.
We're being tricked,
don't be a sheeple."
He looked at me in disgust,
and said he worked
for the committee for...
Mason, I've finished.
Bye!
- Hi.
- Hi.
Do you want to come in?
All right.
Nico's about to get here, but...
You have a beautiful house.
Thank you. Yeah.
We'll be moving soon. I hope.
Because of the squatters?
Yeah.
That's a shame.
Not for me, truth be told.
How are you?
You have to come back to the film.
- Yeah, it's just...
- Let me talk.
Let me talk. I spoke with Roco.
I was sure you'd come back
but she said you were thinking it over.
In the end...
I'm sorry about the other day.
But let me speak.
Then decide whatever you want.
This movie, all the work we've done,
not just us, but everybody,
centers on you being the lead.
If it's not you, we won't do it.
We'll make another movie, not this one.
And I want to make this movie.
We all want to make it.
We're ready to start.
We're waiting for you.
You can't let us out in the dark.
You can't not do it.
It's going to be beautiful.
- I know, but...
- And you owe it to yourself.
Let me think about it, okay?
There's nothing to think.
I won't be a problem, really.
I'll keep my distance,
we're just making a movie.
Trust me.
And forgive me.
Shit!
- Wow.
- The iron!
- The chef's jacket!
- Let me see.
No! Let me see.
- You're good at ironing.
- Please.
- This comes out with soap?
- Sure.
- This is beyond repair.
- Hi.
What's up?
What's up?
- Hi, I'm Nico.
- Bruno.
- At last, I've heard so much about you.
- So have I.
- Me too.
- What happened?
I had... I burnt your jacket.
It's okay.
- I'm really sorry.
- No problem, I have more.
Ona told me about
the film, it sucks.
- What sucks?
- The money thing.
But it's already fixed.
- Really?
- Yeah.
That's great. When do you start?
- Soon.
- Really?
- Right away.
- Congratulations.
Yeah, we're exhilarated,
that's why I came to tell Ramona.
You call her Ramona?
Yeah, yes.
He can call you that?
He doesn't pay any attention to me.
I'll go for a quick change of clothes
and let's go celebrate.
Okay.
Although I have to leave,
they're expecting me.
- Too bad.
- Yeah.
- Another day, then.
- Sure.
- Lovely to meet you.
- Same here.
Well, come on, go.
CHAPTER V:
THE FILM AND LIFE
Come in!
What are you doing here?
I came to see you.
Right.
I can see that. But why now?
To tell you something.
All right. Tell me and leave,
this isn't a good time.
I love you.
I love you too.
I know, but I'm in love with you.
Len,
you deserve someone
better than me, someone...
purer, more innocent.
I love you.
Okay, but right now it can't be.
I brought you flowers.
Well, take them away.
I'm waiting for someone important.
If you're in love with me we can talk
tomorrow or at another time.
But now leave, okay?
Ramona...
it's me.
I know it's you.
I know. But...
But now please leave
Len.
Cut!
- Is that good for you?
- Yeah.
- Fine by me.
- Everything okay?
Yeah?
People, it's a wrap.
Why aren't you ready?
What are you doing here?
What do you mean?
It's the wrap party.
- Hi.
- I forgot.
- Hi.
- I completely forgot.
I don't believe you.
Believe me.
Can't someone take your place?
No, I don't think so.
You have to come,
it's the wrap party.
Go without me.
Please, ask Andrea or someone
to sub you.
It's better if you go alone.
- What?
- It's better if you go alone.
What do you mean?
What do you think I mean?
I didn't want to talk earlier
so you wouldn't lose your concentration.
Talk about what?
Don't we have to talk
before going to any party?
About what?
This isn't the time, either.
Well, it's the only time.
You've fallen in love.
What are you saying? No way.
No way!
Don't you think
something has happened to you?
Yeah, loads of stuff, but not that.
Not that. Not that.
Come on. Go to your party.
We'll talk tomorrow. I have to work.
What are you going to do?
Yes, hello. Hi.
Sorry, just a sec,
I know you've had enough
of me being a bore, tonight I won't.
For the time being.
I don't know if you know this,
but a long time ago
Ramona sang in a band
in London.
Yeah.
So, please...
- Please.
- No.
- Really.
- Please!
No.
Come and sing for us.
There's no getting out.
I carved out my name on your boat
I became a seawoman for you
So I could sail the seas
Steering through desires
I was so happy in your arms
I was so happy in your harbor
That my heart was made prisoner
Of your body and your skin
Like a wave your love reached my life
Like a wave of fires and caresses
Of white seafoam and shell rumors
Like a wave
I was tied up forever to your storm
I lost my bearings without realizing
Like a wave
Your love grew like a wave
Are you okay?
Nico has said we have to talk.
Of course.
- The film is over.
- I know.
I never thought it would be over.
And now what?
I don't know.
- It's not so easy.
- Yeah, it is.
Okay.
You act on impulse,
so you think it's easy.
But you can't go around like that.
Yes you can.
Right now, for example.
I have to tell you how I feel
or I'm going to die.
Could you be a little less dramatic?
It is dramatic!
Even more for you!
Because you have to do something.
I don't have to do a thing.
Just wait for you.
How can you be
so sure?
Because when you're near
I feel peace.
I feel everything's fine,
everything will turn out right.
Even though
we're always three feet apart.
Well...
Sometimes it's less.
- Who cares.
- And I see you look at me.
And many times I know you know
I'm looking at you,
and you're also happy when I'm near,
because I understand you
better than others.
You know
you can do whatever you want
because I'm looking at you
and I like you all the same.
And I love you all the same.
I always love you.
Even when you forget
your lines or whatever.
And it's not impulsive.
You and I can't be together.
Why?
Because we'd be useless in life,
it would be too chaotic.
We've just made a movie together!
- What else do you want to do?
- Things.
In life you have to do things
besides a movie!
Where are we going?
I'm going home.
You, I don't know.
- I don't know what to do.
- I'd rather you didn't follow me.
It's frustrating, right?
Because you've been following me.
Now it's my turn.
What do you want?
I don't know.
I can't make promises,
as if we were a couple of teenagers.
Everything can go wrong.
Okay.
- But don't get mad.
- Yes, I'm mad.
I'm mad.
What do you want?
I can't lie to him.
- You're already doing it.
- That's not true.
You're such a coward.
I'm not a coward.
You think this is someone else's life
or that this is a movie?
If someone has it right in front of them,
they can't let it go by.
That's like denying life.
CHAPTER VI:
THE END
Hi, I'm Ramona,
I'm 32 and these are my profiles.
Okay. When you're ready.
I saw you from my window yesterday.
I saw you looking at her.
Sorry. It's just that...
Getting so much into the emotions
has muddled me up.
I'll do a different text. Okay?
- Okay.
- Here I go.
I can't believe it, man.
I can't believe it when people say,
"So, you're an orphan?"
When it's crystal clear
that everything I do say or feel in life
is determined by that.
It's tattooed on my forehead.
I'm an orphan!
Do you think I'd be here if I wasn't?
No. No!
My life would be different. So would I,
and none of this would be happening.
If you're not an orphan,
you have no idea.
No idea.
That's the biggest abandonment there is.
"Hey, I was there but I'm not any longer!
Now you take care of everything alone.
And you have to be happy
and smile.
And enjoy life, since you're not dead."
Sometimes I dream I get home
and find my parents
in the living room,
as if nothing had happened.
At first I feel...
I feel relief and happiness
at them being alive, at the joke.
Of course it was a joke,
I knew it had to be.
Then I tell them,
"Where were you?"
Then they laugh at me.
I don't understand and say,
"How could you do this to me?"
And...
I don't understand anything.
And I start feeling a rage towards them.
My rage is so big I wake up
and they die again.
I had them, and then I lose them again.
And that's it.
I can't abandon someone who loves me.
Don't you get it?
Hi.
Hi.
Ignacio told me
to bring these papers over.
Come in.
Ignacio isn't here,
but you can leave them...
Sure, here.
- How is the editing going?
- Good.
Well,
you can imagine.
With so many doubts.
My mom used to say
a doubt means a no.
- A doubt is a no?
- A yes is absolutely clear.
Did you know I'm singing
with a band of twenty somethings?
Fuck me, that's great!
- It's really cool.
- That's cool.
I have to get to the movies, I'm late.
Of course. I hope you enjoy the film.
Thank you.
Well...
- See you.
- Bye.
- There's no one here.
- Yeah.
We're early.
- What should we do?
- I'm going to the bathroom.
Okay, I'm going to smoke.
All right. I'll wait for you outside.
TO MY FATHER