Remote Control (1988) Movie Script
1
The only thing on cable worth
watching is public access.
Everything else is just more
of the same crapola.
As a paid-up member of the TV
generation, I feel betrayed, don't you?
I can't feel anything.
This thing's cutting my circulation off.
Ready for the, uh, "S&M Made Fun" tape?
No. This is gonna take awhile.
Alan, while I was renting that stupid tape
I also picked up a movie. Might as well put it on.
Your favorite... 50s sci-fi.
Oh neat-o Milo... it really works!
Movies in our very own home.
I'm glad you're happy with it, Eva.
I hear the Smiths have ordered one too.
Have to keep up with the times in the 1980s!
Julia! Dig this...
this movie was made back in...
in 1957, and they predicted we were gonna
have VCRs in the 1980s.
Thank the stars for modern conveniences.
Now I can do my knitting,
and watch my movies on television without
any snickering brats chewing popcorn in my ears.
What are you watching, dear?
Milo?
There's something wrong with this movie.
I feel so strange!
[electronic voices] Eva... Eva... Eva...
[electronic voices] Eva... Eva... Eva!!
Dear... I asked what movie you're watching.
[electronic voices] Eva... Eva! Eva...
[electronic voices] Eva! Eva... Eva...
Eva?
Remote Control?
Remote Control...
that's the name of this movie too.
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo! Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo! Milo... Milo...
No! Put that down!
Eva! What are you doing?!
No! Eva!
[electronic voices] Alan.. Alan... Alan...
[electronic voices] Alan.. Alan! Alan...
What the hell?
I'm suffocating in this thing.
Promise you'll take it off
before the kids see me.
Alan? You're not recording me
in this thing are you?
[electronic voices] Alan.. Alan... Alan...
Alan... what's wrong?
Don't you hear it?
Hear what?
What's going on?
[electronic voices] Julia... Julia... Julia...
[electronic voices] Julia? Julia! Julia...
[electronic voices] Julia! Julia? Julia...
[electronic voices] Julia! Julia!! Julia...
No!
Julia!
Cosmo... stop stocking and help me
set this display up, will ya?
Hi there.
Can I help you with something?
Stolen Kisses?
Stolen Kisses?
Franois Truffaut.
Sounds French.
Maybe you should check the foreign section.
It is...
and I did.
Cosmo.
It's romantic, huh?
Very.
Yeah? What's it about?
Non-provisional love.
Interesting.
Very... French, you know?
And very hard to find,
I'm sad to say.
Which one?
I mean the tape? Or the love?
Both.
Cosmo!
Come here.
Oh, by the way, what's your name?
I mean, in case the tape comes in...
who am I holding it for?
Belinda Watson.
Thanks for the help.
Thank you.
Boss!
Help me set this thing up,
take that side.
Put that on the... wait, Cosmo, you're smoking.
Don't smoke in the store, I told you a million times.
This whole thing's just supposed to snap right together,
but I've been snapping on this thing all night and....
Aww, this thing's supposed to spin around.
Hey Georgie...
Why don't you try plugging it in, huh?
Yeah.
Nice.
Yeah?
Remote Control.
This sales guy comes in here the other day,
he's handing out sample cassettes free,
if you run this display, so....
I took two.
And we get a mirror out of the deal.
Jeez.
Sure catches people's attention.
Really... the scariest thing you
could look at is yourself.
Ask any shrink you want.
I'm way behind.
I gotta get back on rewind patrol, here.
You friggin' people know
you got rewind buttons?
Oh, jeez, sorry sir.
Friggin' people keep your friggin' store open.
Uh, excuse me sir,
he didn't mean to insult anybody.
That's just the way he is,
he's, uh, got a motor mouth.
Motor mouth, huh?
Yeah, so do you.
Cosmo!
Help me find a tape.
If you need any help, sir, just holler.
Excuse me.
Remote Control...
I thought they were all out.
Nope, just came in.
Might be too scary for you.
Maybe you'll have to
come over and hold my hand.
Hey! It's mine!
I had it first!
I'm very sorry ma'am.
- Uh, excuse me sir, all tapes first come, first served...
- I saw it first and she knows it!
Uh, hold on one second sir.
Hey listen....
Can you do me a favor?
- What?
- How about picking something else?
- No!
- How do you know you're even gonna like it?
- You know.
- Ever see War of the Worlds?
No.
Uh, sir?
She says if she can
find War of the Worlds,
she'll gladly give you her
copy of Remote Control.
I never said that.
I couldn't find my other choice.
Sorry.
Wait in the car,
I'll be right there.
Okay, here's your tape
and your card. Thanks a lot.
Sweetie Pie...
Could you hold War of the Worlds
for me when it gets in?
- Sure, you got it.
- I hear it's almost as good as Remote Control.
- Here, let me bag that for you.
- Okay.
Oh, sir, I can hold Remote Control for
you when it comes back if you want.
No, that won't be necessary.
Thanks.
[in unison] "That won't be necessary?"
Cosmo, remind me to order about another
dozen of those Remote Controls.
They moved outta here like
Springsteen tickets.
Look at this.
Maybe lookin' at yourself in the mirror
is the scariest thing you can do,
but those people are dying to do it.
Sure you don't want a bag for that?
Bye bye.
Hey Cosmo!
War of the Worlds.
It was on the return cart
the whole time.
That chick Allegra wanted this.
Why don't you call her
and tell her we got it?
Me?
Why don't you deliver it to her?
Would you go with me?
I mean you can just wait in the
car or something. Keep me company.
Georgie....
When are you gonna learn?
Women don't bite.
You keep using crutches
you'll never learn to walk.
I'm not using crutches.
My sister's here.
What's up big guy?
C'mon up here, give Uncle Cosmo a hug.
- Hi Georgie.
- Hi Patricia, how are ya?
- Not bad.
- Can I have a tape, Uncle Cosmo?
No, no tapes for him.
Go pick out something good.
I just got through telling him no tapes!
Cosmo, why are you spoiling him?
Hey, close your eyes when
you pass the adult section!
Cosmo, let's shut this stuff
off and go home.
Wow.
Remote Control?
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo!
Help! Put that down!
Eva! What are you doing?!
No! Eva!
That's enough, he's dead already.
Oh gross.
What's your problem, lady?
Oh my god,
I'm on Candid Camera!
Hi Alan Funt!
What are you doing here?
I came to see the movie.
I thought "Hey..."
"Why not lose control together?"
[electronic voices] Allegra... Allegra... Allegra...
What's that noise?
What is it?
What if she takes the tape
and slams the door in my face?
Just keep your nose out
of the way, that's all.
Hey, you think you'll
get back with Delores?
I mean if I had a girlfriend with half the tits
Delores had, I'd marry her in a second.
Georgie, you don't marry tits.
Oh yeah?
That's why my sister's divorced
and Matthew don't have a father.
Same thing happened with my parents.
Whatever they saw in each
other was purely physical.
Love, Georgie.
Non-provisional love,
no strings attached.
That's the name of the game.
Where did you get that bullshit from?
Belinda Watson.
Nice ring, huh?
Yeah.
[electronic voices] Allegra... Allegra! Allegra...
[electronic voices] Allegra! Allegra... Allegra...
[electronic voices] Allegra! Allegra... Allegra!
[electronic voices] Allegra... Allegra! Allegra...
[electronic voices] Victor! Victor. Victor...
- Hey Georgie!
- What?
Aren't you forgetting something?
Do I look okay?
If looks could kill she's dead meat.
- Okay, you wait right here.
- Yeah.
Cosmo, come here.
Check it out.
Looks like I gotta wait in line.
Just me and you, Georgie...
two losers at the game of love.
Hey, what're you doing?
Georgie! Get down from there!
Hey Georgie... Peeping Tomming is a felony.
No, not if no one sees you.
Hey, you know what it's like makin'
license plates all day?
I'll be no party to such perversions.
This is hot.
What?
Ah, I've seen that guy before.
Belinda's boyfriend.
Sure gets around, don't he?
He's doing exactly what the
guy in the movie's doing.
But that don't look like any
old sci-fi movie I've ever seen,
they didn't have sex back then.
Hey...
maybe it's one of those
"How to Hump Right" tapes.
Hey man, that's him on TV.
They must be taping themselves!
You get down from there!
Hey! Hey!
Her parents, her parents.
Oh shit.
Wait, I wanna watch her parents
catching her making a porno movie.
Wait a minute!
What the hell's going on up there?
Sounds like she rented a movie.
I didn't even know she was home.
Allegra!
Allegra?
Honey?
Are you alright?
Arnold?
Oh no....
Here I come!
Help!
I'm gonna get you!
Yes I am....
gonna catch you!
Gonna get you!
I got you!
Mademoiselle....
I know that I am not unknown to you.
For a long time I've been
watching you secretly.
Madamoiselle, I know I'm not
unknown to you, for a long time....
But a few days ago I made up
my mind to stop hiding...
because now I know the moment's come.
For now I know the moment has come....
C'mon Cosmo, this is the
busiest time of the day!
Georgie, wait til you find out what
it's like to be pierced by Cupid's arrow.
Yeah, I don't wanna know if it makes me fuck off
from work memorizing frog films all day. C'mon!
...want to break off ties
that are provisional.
That bind you to people
that are provisional.
"That bind you to people
that are provisional."
...and cheat behind your back.
Cheating comes naturally to rich people, Cosmo.
Haven't you ever seen Dallas?
Sometimes I think I know more
about women than you do.
Keep screwing around I'm
running a "Help Wanted" sign.
Oh!
You're here.
Yes. I'm here.
Stolen Kisses came in,
I'm holding it for you.
Oh, great.
Came in this morning.
Remote Control?
Just one second, sir.
Ah, Georgie Peorgie!
Yeah.
Any more Remote Controls?
Yeah, someone dropped one in the overnight.
Right over there.
Right this way young lady.
You know, I was watching it....
It's uh... it's very umm...
French?
Yeah.
Randolph Lane?
You're movin' up in
the world, aren't ya?
Did you tell her about
her horny boyfriend?
Here, wait!
Look, I don't wanna play your
little boy games, is that clear?
Senorita!
I mean madamoiselle.
I know that I am not unknown to you.
For a long time I've been
watching you secretly.
Cosmo.
I understand if you want to break
off ties that are provisional,
that bind you to people
that are provisional...
So what's going on here?
Nothing.
It was a scene from the movie I'm renting.
Well, we better get going if you
want to get in a full workout.
Ah, thanks for the help.
Hey, wait.
It's not nothing.
I know all about life.
I know everybody betrays everyone.
Heh... let me go.
Don't be an example.
We'll never leave each other,
not for a moment.
You're crazy, you know that?
Sure, I know it.
I'm blinded by desire.
Maybe you should wear glasses.
I tell you Cosmo, she deserves that creep.
Cosmo!
Hey Artie! How's it going?
Let's ask.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to have
to ask you to all please leave the store.
Wait a minute... Cosmo!
Just a minute!
Get on the counter!
Artie, what's this muldoon doing to me here?
Spread 'em!
Hope this is a drill, Artie.
Spread 'em.
We had two beauties last night.
Some lady didn't like what was on TV...
so she dressed up in a leather spacesuit
and whipped her husband to death.
Yeah, then you guys take care of
Allegra James and her whole family.
We found your library card on the lawn, Georgie.
Someone steal your wallet?
No, we just watched her in the window is all!
We just... we didn't kill her though! We didn't....
Shut up!
Artie... you've known me a long time.
Yeah.
Too long.
Artie, the guy who must've
done it just waltzed out of here.
Belinda!
Freeze!
I swear it, Artie... we saw him there.
You saw him?
Me and Georgie.
We both seen him.
We got a witness that saw two men.
Georgie climbin' on the wall
outside the girl's window... and you.
Wait, wait a minute. Can you
lock the store? The key's in my pocket.
They were taping it, right Georgie?
Yeah, they... we saw them on TV!
Tell it to the judge.
Artie...
was there a camera in there?
How 'bout a VCR?
So what? Everybody's got one.
I got two.
Did you check inside it?
Maybe the tape's still in there.
Hey.
Guy tapes himself
committing a murder,
runs off with the camera
but forgets to take the tape?
C'mon Artie, maybe
something scared this guy off.
C'mon it's a shot, Artie.
For old times' sake.
What's taking 'em so long?
Invisible evidence is hard to find.
It really works.
Movies in our very own home.
I'm glad you're happy with it, Eva.
I hear the Smiths have ordered one too.
Have to keep up with the times...
Forget it Artie, it's not on there.
It's just the movie.
Damn it!
I could've sworn they were recording it.
Artie, take the cuffs off.
I gotta call this girl and
tell her she's with a maniac.
C'mon Artie, I won't run, I swear.
Help! Put that down!
Eva! What're you doing? Help!
Eva!
The number of Matrix One on Central Avenue.
Okay, thanks a lot.
Hey Cosmo, get a load of this.
I'm on TV!
I tell you Artie, there's a
camera here somewhere!
Me and Georgie, we saw
'em right there, on the TV.
God, am I that fat?
Hey Artie, shut that thing off. We could
be recording over the murder right now.
[electronic voices] Artie... Artie... Artie...
[electronic voices] Artie! Artie!! Artie...
[electronic voices] Artie!! Artie! Artie!
[electronic voices] Artie... Artie!! Artie...
[electronic voices] Artie! Artie!! Artie!
[electronic voices] Artie! Artie... Artie!
Gotta be around here somewhere.
You stay put.
Artie, what are you doing?!
Artie, I won't run, I swear!
Artie, you alright?
Artie, what are you nuts or what?
Artie!
Artie.
What happened?
What happened?
Who got shot?
I shot Artie.
- I killed Artie.
- You're shitting me.
Did you find the camera?
No, I'm lookin' all over for it.
All the sudden he starts
makin' this weird face.
Like he wasn't Artie no more.
He starts shootin' at me.
He shot his own partner.
I had to kill him, Georgie.
You shot Artie with his own gun!
Who's gonna believe us now?
Oh man, we're both gonna fry for this.
Hey, shut up! Maybe this'll
show 'em I'm telling the truth.
You recorded it all?
I hope so.
If there wasn't a camera in there
I'm losing my mind.
What are you doing, man?
The store's not that way!
Over!
In!
Over!
In!
Over!
Keep it sharp folks!
In!
Over!
In!
Over!
Ready to run...
And go!
Five, six, seven, arms up!
Good!
Keep it sharp folks!
Watch your form!
Ready for arms only... Ready! And...
Good!
In!
Over!
In!
Over!
Good!
Belinda!
Focus Belinda!
Five, six, seven, and...
Way to kick! Up!
Knees high!
Knees high, ladies!
Go!
Are you gonna follow me
the rest of my life?
Maybe...
if that's what it takes to
keep you away from Victor.
Look, I'm very flattered,
but if you're tring to imply that
my boyfriend's cheating on me
I hardly think it's any of your business.
Not cheating...
killing.
Killing?
Just what exactly do you mean by "killing"?
I mean murder one, babe.
C'mon, let's take a walk.
Cosmo, what are you doing with her?
We gotta get outta here, man,
two muldoons just came by here.
Get in.
No.
Look. I said get in, alright?
Oh God.
Cosmo, wait a minute.
You forgot to put a dime in the meter.
Cop cars don't need dimes.
C'mon, inside.
Ow!
Georgie, flick off the security camera.
Yeah, I still got these
bracelets on, remember?
Put 'em up here.
Cosmo!
Hold it!
Please don't kill me!
Don't make me have to.
C'mon.
Grab this hammer.
Pop those cuffs.
See this? This has got your boyfriend playing
Jack the Ripper in living black and white.
Okay, it should be right
after this part right here.
This lady's doing a perforation job on her
husband with her knitting machine.
C'mon Cosmo, check for muldoons.
Then she sees herself on the screen and
she gets this weird look on her face.
What are you doing?
C'mon, this is no time to watch a movie.
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda... Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda! Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda! Belinda!! Belinda!
Georgie!
The security cameras went back on.
No, that isn't possible.
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda! Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda!! Belinda! Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda! Belinda...
Cosmo, look out!
What are you doin'?!
What are you doin'?!
Georgie!
Chuck the tape!
Georgie!
Georgie!
That's exactly what just
happened with Artie.
Something about this movie.
Makes you lose control,
just like the display says!
C'mon Cosmo, don't crack up on me now, huh?
"A young man discovers an evil alien
plot and must race against time..."
"to save mankind from self-destruction."
Aliens...
that's what was controlling
the woman in the movie.
Yeah, what was controlling her?
I could have killed you.
He should have killed you.
C'mon.
You got any more copies of this?
Uh...
Uh, yeah, just the one
that Victor guy rented.
Your boyfriend Victor's got the other copy.
Check inside.
Take this.
Keep an eye on her.
Don't move! Just...
you better not move.
Good afternoon, madamoiselle.
Can I get a ticket?
Oh, no more tickets, sir.
Too many cars were getting stolen.
Do me a favor and lock these doors,
I got some very serious suits in there.
Will do, sir!
Enjoy your lunch.
Get in.
Ow!
Nice.
C'mon! I said get in.
C'mon.
Thank you!
Give yourselves up, if you're
innocent you shouldn't run.
We gotta prove it first.
Wait a minute. That Victor guy
doesn't have the only one of these.
That guy handing out sample cassettes
must have given 'em to other stores.
Where's the nearest video store?
Uh... Satellite Video on Ardsley Road.
No, no.
You stay with her.
And watch for muldoons.
Get outta my seat.
C'mon.
Hello?
Is there a manager around?
I'm the manager...
eat shit and die!
Georgie!
Shoot him!
What?!
Shoot him.
What?!
The gun!
No! Not me! Him!
Shoot him!
Shoot him!
Shoot him!
Shit!
Shit!
Hit him!
Shit!
With the gun!
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Cosmo!
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo... Cosmo!!
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo!! Cosmo!!
[electronic voices] Cosmo!! Cosmo!! Cosmo!!
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo! Cosmo!
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo!! Cosmo!
Lucky so far only the samples went out.
I think they just did that to create some
kind of hype, get a demand going.
Those displays are sure doing the trick.
Remember? I was getting ready
to order another dozen.
Well let's just tell all the video stores.
Do you know how many video stores
there are in this country?
Country? The whole friggin' world!
Whose makin' these tapes?
Belinda, check the box.
Polaris Video.
Let's get our hands on a phone book
and find out their address.
Cosmo.
Hey, lock 'em up. I don't want
this guy's suits gettin' robbed.
Do you think they're open?
I see some people in there.
Yeah. It's Saturday.
They're never gonna let us just snoop
around in there, we need a plan.
Nobu Hashimoto, report to Operations.
Nobu Hashimoto, report to Operations.
Mitsu Narahara to Security Office immediately.
This is your limited run facility.
Now what do I mean by limited run?
That's your fifty to perhaps
two hundred unit cassette order.
I see.
Uh, what's the title of the project, Mr. uh....
McNuttany.
Uh...
It's a how-to. How, how to...
How to be Jane Fonda.
Yeah.
Sure sounds different enough.
Are you kidding?
There's nothing like it on the market.
I take it you're going to be the star.
Yeah, we're gonna have the whole friggin' world
looking like Jane Fonda before we're done.
Well I imagine that'll require
quite a cassette order.
Well the main duplicating room
is right this way, people.
Akita Yoshida to Editing Bay Number Three.
Wow.
Wait til Mrs. McNuttany hears
about this, she's gonna cream.
Right now all the completed
tapes are being gathered,
and fresh ones are being put in
for the next taping cycle.
So, uh, what is it you're taping here?
Maybe something we've heard of?
If you haven't, you will soon.
Wait! Wait! Don't go up there!
Wait!
Hey you! Shut that tape!
Shut the door.
Lock it.
Your cassettes are
destroying innocent people.
Somehow I get the feeling we're not
breaking any news to these guys.
Cassette don't destroy.
People destroy.
Right Mr. Denver?
Oh you're in on this too, huh?
Everyone at Polaris Video serves
the Master Controller.
Master Controller?
The way up there.
The shining star in the heavens.
Look, who do you think
you're talking to, pal?
There's no bullets in there.
You think we'd let you in
here with a loaded gun?
We were expecting you.
Come on.
Enjoy the movie.
Your Earthling technology has
evolved too far! It must be stopped!
Remote Control has spread
throughout your planet!
Now my friends, it's your turn
to give in to the control.
[electronic voices] Ray... Gina... Ray...
[electronic voices] Gina... Ray! Gina!
[electronic voices] Ray... Gina... Ray!
[electronic voices] Gina! Ray... Gina...
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Belinda...
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Belinda! Belinda...
Don't do it.
Don't let 'em control you.
Denver!
Look in the monitor.
Look at yourself!
Don't listen to him!
Shoot the bastard!
Enough!
Victor did not resist darkness.
No!
It's all my fault.
I bought the rights to Remote Control.
I thought it was just another movie.
How do we stop 'em?
Destroy all the tapes.
But you gotta get every one of 'em.
It only takes one tape...
to make thousands more.
Why did they pick home videos
to destroy mankind?
Holy Christ.
That old movie gave the real
aliens up there the friggin' idea!
Cosmo, shoot a hole in this thing.
- Where are they?
- Up there!
My back!
Oh God, Georgie!
Stop them!
They're headed towards Operations!
Run movie.
But the Controller does not allow...
The Controller is dead!
Come on! Let's go!
I am now Controller.
I serve the Master Controllers.
Stop them!
They're heading towards Operations!
Let's go!
Move!
Come on.
Air freight trucks... they're shipping copies of
Remote Control all over the world.
Cosmo, you gotta stop 'em.
Oh Jesus, Georgie, you're bleedin' real bad.
C'mon, we can get you outta here.
Cosmo....
I'm right here, Georgie.
You're gonna make a lovely couple.
Don't talk, George, we're gonna get
you outta here, man. Save your breath.
Oh Georgie....
Georgie?
C'mon. C'mon, Georgie.
C'mon, Georgie, don't do this to me man!
Gonna get you outta here.
C'mon.
Get outta here! Now!
Where are they?
He's headed for the tanks!
Stop them!
Wait! Ray!
No!
Wait, Cosmo!
Stop!
How many truckloads of
Remote Control went out?
This is the first load.
Get outta here.
Drive!
Go!
Cosmo, where are we going?
Video stores.
Here's ours, it's got a circle around it.
What's that mean?
Two more stores got circled.
Vid-O-Rama...
and Satellite Video.
Circles mean reorders.
Then we'll go to Vid-O-Rama and
take care of their samples...
and that'll be the end of Remote Control.
Cosmo.
Cosmo.
Cosmo, c'mon!
Get down!
You too!
What's that display doing there?
Why did you aim it at my eyes?
I'm sorry, but you're going to have
to get away from the counter.
Oh, don't worry, it's not a holdup.
I didn't aim it at your eyes,
they did... those kids!
I had it at the back of the
store and they moved it!
Belinda, no!
Get away from that
display, it's not normal.
See it?
It controlled them to put it there.
It knew I was comin'.
Gimme that tape!
We need to know who rented
your other two copies of Remote Control.
Their addresses too.
He can't control himself.
Shut up!
Belinda...
[in unison] Belinda...
Look...
you gotta help us.
Who's got the other tapes?
[in unison] Belinda...
One's at the Retro Club...
the other one's out to
a Patricia DeClemente.
What?
Patricia...
[in unison] Patricia... Patricia...
Patricia who?
My sister. My nephew's got that tape!
Ow!
And why don't you guys go home
and watch a tape too?
He'll either call or he'll show up sooner or later.
They always do.
What they?
He's no murderer, I oughta know my own brother better than you guys.
Cosmo's not coming,
and he's definitely not calling.
There's something wrong with this movie.
I feel so strange!
Cute.
How do you want your coffee?
Black.
Remote Control?
Here, take this.
I'll meet you back here, okay?
Of all the asses to pick to save the world,
I don't know how they ever picked mine.
Ours.
[in unison] Belinda... Belinda... Belinda...
I changed my mind, I'd like milk.
Eva! What are you doing?! No!
Eva!
Mom, I'm on TV!
[electronic voices] Matthew... Matthew... Matthew...
[electronic voices] Matthew... Matthew. Matthew...
[electronic voices] Matthew! Matthew. Matthew...
[electronic voices] Matthew! Matthew... Matthew!!
Hi Uncle Cosmo.
No!
Police! Freeze!
Stand back, lady. Stand back!
No, Cosmo!
Why did you come home, Cosmo?
Hey!
Come here!
Get outta the way!
Shut the tape!
You gotta shut the tape!
Listen to me everyone!
Hey Controller! You see this?!
C'mon. Let's get outta here.
Let go!
Are you crazy?
Belinda, what is going on?
What started this?
Oh, come on.
Don't play innocent with me.
You killed that family.
No... that was the guys in the video store.
It was on the news!
You told Polaris Video we were coming!
When they said that you were seen with
them,
I thought for sure you were kidnapped.
It's okay.
You're safe now.
Let's get in the car.
I'll drive you home.
Belinda!
C'mon Belinda, please be home.
Please be home.
Who is it?
It's me! Cosmo!
It ain't easy being an Earthling.
Did you get the tape from the Retro?
No, but I watched it burn.
I have Victor's copy though.
What?
Where'd you get that?
From Victor...
he gave it to me.
Just like that.
Just like that.
Cosmo... he saved my life too.
Got a hammer?
Yeah, right down there in the
drawer on the right.
Where you going?
I need a real hammer.
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo. Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo! Cosmo...
Oh! There you are.
What's wrong?
That's not the tape.
It's playin' in there right now.
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda... Belinda.
[electronic voices] Belinda. Belinda! Belinda...
You set me up!
So it was all just a plan from the start?
You and me?
Just a stinking lie?
Hey Cosmo.
Want a slice?
You've been wondering how the movie ended.
Haven't you, Cosmo?
Well, let's see...
the hero gives in to the Control,
and the Master Controllers destroy mankind.
Who... who is that?
Who's there?
Oh, Cosmo!
Oh, I'm so glad you're okay.
Is Matthew alright?
Victor... where is he?
He's in the garage, taking a long rest.
Why don't the lights work?
I shut the juice to stop the tape player!
What?
Don't give me "what"!
Don't lie to me anymore!
I'm not!
I remember...
Victor, he... he dropped me home, and...
and... he kept telling me
the whole time that you
were a murderer...
and he was so convincing, I...
I just let him in the house.
The next thing I knew, he...
Oh, he had the tape on.
Cosmo...
whatever I might have said,
it wasn't me.
Cosmo...
I love you.
[electronic voices] Cosmo. Cosmo!
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo! Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo!! Cosmo.
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo. Cosmo...
Cosmo?
Cosmo...
Did you put the power back on?
Hey, c'mon in. The coast is clear.
Hey baby.
You found the gun.
Great!
We still might need it.
Hey, what're you doin'?
I told you, it's over.
C'mon now. Give me the gun.
Why don't I trust you, you're different!
You trust me...
remember?
Our love is non-provisional.
No strings attached.
Come on.
Gimme the gun.
You little bitch!
You're gonna die!
Look at us!
You're trying to kill me!
And I'm trying to kill you!
Cosmo, they don't care who
dies as long as they win!
You!
You hear me?
You don't kill my friends...
You don't mess with my people!
Nobody fucks with this planet!
You got that?!
Nobody!
I wonder how the original movie ended?
Are you kidding?
Just like this.
We win.
No, we win... Cosmo.
The only thing on cable worth
watching is public access.
Everything else is just more
of the same crapola.
As a paid-up member of the TV
generation, I feel betrayed, don't you?
I can't feel anything.
This thing's cutting my circulation off.
Ready for the, uh, "S&M Made Fun" tape?
No. This is gonna take awhile.
Alan, while I was renting that stupid tape
I also picked up a movie. Might as well put it on.
Your favorite... 50s sci-fi.
Oh neat-o Milo... it really works!
Movies in our very own home.
I'm glad you're happy with it, Eva.
I hear the Smiths have ordered one too.
Have to keep up with the times in the 1980s!
Julia! Dig this...
this movie was made back in...
in 1957, and they predicted we were gonna
have VCRs in the 1980s.
Thank the stars for modern conveniences.
Now I can do my knitting,
and watch my movies on television without
any snickering brats chewing popcorn in my ears.
What are you watching, dear?
Milo?
There's something wrong with this movie.
I feel so strange!
[electronic voices] Eva... Eva... Eva...
[electronic voices] Eva... Eva... Eva!!
Dear... I asked what movie you're watching.
[electronic voices] Eva... Eva! Eva...
[electronic voices] Eva! Eva... Eva...
Eva?
Remote Control?
Remote Control...
that's the name of this movie too.
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo! Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo! Milo... Milo...
No! Put that down!
Eva! What are you doing?!
No! Eva!
[electronic voices] Alan.. Alan... Alan...
[electronic voices] Alan.. Alan! Alan...
What the hell?
I'm suffocating in this thing.
Promise you'll take it off
before the kids see me.
Alan? You're not recording me
in this thing are you?
[electronic voices] Alan.. Alan... Alan...
Alan... what's wrong?
Don't you hear it?
Hear what?
What's going on?
[electronic voices] Julia... Julia... Julia...
[electronic voices] Julia? Julia! Julia...
[electronic voices] Julia! Julia? Julia...
[electronic voices] Julia! Julia!! Julia...
No!
Julia!
Cosmo... stop stocking and help me
set this display up, will ya?
Hi there.
Can I help you with something?
Stolen Kisses?
Stolen Kisses?
Franois Truffaut.
Sounds French.
Maybe you should check the foreign section.
It is...
and I did.
Cosmo.
It's romantic, huh?
Very.
Yeah? What's it about?
Non-provisional love.
Interesting.
Very... French, you know?
And very hard to find,
I'm sad to say.
Which one?
I mean the tape? Or the love?
Both.
Cosmo!
Come here.
Oh, by the way, what's your name?
I mean, in case the tape comes in...
who am I holding it for?
Belinda Watson.
Thanks for the help.
Thank you.
Boss!
Help me set this thing up,
take that side.
Put that on the... wait, Cosmo, you're smoking.
Don't smoke in the store, I told you a million times.
This whole thing's just supposed to snap right together,
but I've been snapping on this thing all night and....
Aww, this thing's supposed to spin around.
Hey Georgie...
Why don't you try plugging it in, huh?
Yeah.
Nice.
Yeah?
Remote Control.
This sales guy comes in here the other day,
he's handing out sample cassettes free,
if you run this display, so....
I took two.
And we get a mirror out of the deal.
Jeez.
Sure catches people's attention.
Really... the scariest thing you
could look at is yourself.
Ask any shrink you want.
I'm way behind.
I gotta get back on rewind patrol, here.
You friggin' people know
you got rewind buttons?
Oh, jeez, sorry sir.
Friggin' people keep your friggin' store open.
Uh, excuse me sir,
he didn't mean to insult anybody.
That's just the way he is,
he's, uh, got a motor mouth.
Motor mouth, huh?
Yeah, so do you.
Cosmo!
Help me find a tape.
If you need any help, sir, just holler.
Excuse me.
Remote Control...
I thought they were all out.
Nope, just came in.
Might be too scary for you.
Maybe you'll have to
come over and hold my hand.
Hey! It's mine!
I had it first!
I'm very sorry ma'am.
- Uh, excuse me sir, all tapes first come, first served...
- I saw it first and she knows it!
Uh, hold on one second sir.
Hey listen....
Can you do me a favor?
- What?
- How about picking something else?
- No!
- How do you know you're even gonna like it?
- You know.
- Ever see War of the Worlds?
No.
Uh, sir?
She says if she can
find War of the Worlds,
she'll gladly give you her
copy of Remote Control.
I never said that.
I couldn't find my other choice.
Sorry.
Wait in the car,
I'll be right there.
Okay, here's your tape
and your card. Thanks a lot.
Sweetie Pie...
Could you hold War of the Worlds
for me when it gets in?
- Sure, you got it.
- I hear it's almost as good as Remote Control.
- Here, let me bag that for you.
- Okay.
Oh, sir, I can hold Remote Control for
you when it comes back if you want.
No, that won't be necessary.
Thanks.
[in unison] "That won't be necessary?"
Cosmo, remind me to order about another
dozen of those Remote Controls.
They moved outta here like
Springsteen tickets.
Look at this.
Maybe lookin' at yourself in the mirror
is the scariest thing you can do,
but those people are dying to do it.
Sure you don't want a bag for that?
Bye bye.
Hey Cosmo!
War of the Worlds.
It was on the return cart
the whole time.
That chick Allegra wanted this.
Why don't you call her
and tell her we got it?
Me?
Why don't you deliver it to her?
Would you go with me?
I mean you can just wait in the
car or something. Keep me company.
Georgie....
When are you gonna learn?
Women don't bite.
You keep using crutches
you'll never learn to walk.
I'm not using crutches.
My sister's here.
What's up big guy?
C'mon up here, give Uncle Cosmo a hug.
- Hi Georgie.
- Hi Patricia, how are ya?
- Not bad.
- Can I have a tape, Uncle Cosmo?
No, no tapes for him.
Go pick out something good.
I just got through telling him no tapes!
Cosmo, why are you spoiling him?
Hey, close your eyes when
you pass the adult section!
Cosmo, let's shut this stuff
off and go home.
Wow.
Remote Control?
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo...
[electronic voices] Milo... Milo... Milo!
Help! Put that down!
Eva! What are you doing?!
No! Eva!
That's enough, he's dead already.
Oh gross.
What's your problem, lady?
Oh my god,
I'm on Candid Camera!
Hi Alan Funt!
What are you doing here?
I came to see the movie.
I thought "Hey..."
"Why not lose control together?"
[electronic voices] Allegra... Allegra... Allegra...
What's that noise?
What is it?
What if she takes the tape
and slams the door in my face?
Just keep your nose out
of the way, that's all.
Hey, you think you'll
get back with Delores?
I mean if I had a girlfriend with half the tits
Delores had, I'd marry her in a second.
Georgie, you don't marry tits.
Oh yeah?
That's why my sister's divorced
and Matthew don't have a father.
Same thing happened with my parents.
Whatever they saw in each
other was purely physical.
Love, Georgie.
Non-provisional love,
no strings attached.
That's the name of the game.
Where did you get that bullshit from?
Belinda Watson.
Nice ring, huh?
Yeah.
[electronic voices] Allegra... Allegra! Allegra...
[electronic voices] Allegra! Allegra... Allegra...
[electronic voices] Allegra! Allegra... Allegra!
[electronic voices] Allegra... Allegra! Allegra...
[electronic voices] Victor! Victor. Victor...
- Hey Georgie!
- What?
Aren't you forgetting something?
Do I look okay?
If looks could kill she's dead meat.
- Okay, you wait right here.
- Yeah.
Cosmo, come here.
Check it out.
Looks like I gotta wait in line.
Just me and you, Georgie...
two losers at the game of love.
Hey, what're you doing?
Georgie! Get down from there!
Hey Georgie... Peeping Tomming is a felony.
No, not if no one sees you.
Hey, you know what it's like makin'
license plates all day?
I'll be no party to such perversions.
This is hot.
What?
Ah, I've seen that guy before.
Belinda's boyfriend.
Sure gets around, don't he?
He's doing exactly what the
guy in the movie's doing.
But that don't look like any
old sci-fi movie I've ever seen,
they didn't have sex back then.
Hey...
maybe it's one of those
"How to Hump Right" tapes.
Hey man, that's him on TV.
They must be taping themselves!
You get down from there!
Hey! Hey!
Her parents, her parents.
Oh shit.
Wait, I wanna watch her parents
catching her making a porno movie.
Wait a minute!
What the hell's going on up there?
Sounds like she rented a movie.
I didn't even know she was home.
Allegra!
Allegra?
Honey?
Are you alright?
Arnold?
Oh no....
Here I come!
Help!
I'm gonna get you!
Yes I am....
gonna catch you!
Gonna get you!
I got you!
Mademoiselle....
I know that I am not unknown to you.
For a long time I've been
watching you secretly.
Madamoiselle, I know I'm not
unknown to you, for a long time....
But a few days ago I made up
my mind to stop hiding...
because now I know the moment's come.
For now I know the moment has come....
C'mon Cosmo, this is the
busiest time of the day!
Georgie, wait til you find out what
it's like to be pierced by Cupid's arrow.
Yeah, I don't wanna know if it makes me fuck off
from work memorizing frog films all day. C'mon!
...want to break off ties
that are provisional.
That bind you to people
that are provisional.
"That bind you to people
that are provisional."
...and cheat behind your back.
Cheating comes naturally to rich people, Cosmo.
Haven't you ever seen Dallas?
Sometimes I think I know more
about women than you do.
Keep screwing around I'm
running a "Help Wanted" sign.
Oh!
You're here.
Yes. I'm here.
Stolen Kisses came in,
I'm holding it for you.
Oh, great.
Came in this morning.
Remote Control?
Just one second, sir.
Ah, Georgie Peorgie!
Yeah.
Any more Remote Controls?
Yeah, someone dropped one in the overnight.
Right over there.
Right this way young lady.
You know, I was watching it....
It's uh... it's very umm...
French?
Yeah.
Randolph Lane?
You're movin' up in
the world, aren't ya?
Did you tell her about
her horny boyfriend?
Here, wait!
Look, I don't wanna play your
little boy games, is that clear?
Senorita!
I mean madamoiselle.
I know that I am not unknown to you.
For a long time I've been
watching you secretly.
Cosmo.
I understand if you want to break
off ties that are provisional,
that bind you to people
that are provisional...
So what's going on here?
Nothing.
It was a scene from the movie I'm renting.
Well, we better get going if you
want to get in a full workout.
Ah, thanks for the help.
Hey, wait.
It's not nothing.
I know all about life.
I know everybody betrays everyone.
Heh... let me go.
Don't be an example.
We'll never leave each other,
not for a moment.
You're crazy, you know that?
Sure, I know it.
I'm blinded by desire.
Maybe you should wear glasses.
I tell you Cosmo, she deserves that creep.
Cosmo!
Hey Artie! How's it going?
Let's ask.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to have
to ask you to all please leave the store.
Wait a minute... Cosmo!
Just a minute!
Get on the counter!
Artie, what's this muldoon doing to me here?
Spread 'em!
Hope this is a drill, Artie.
Spread 'em.
We had two beauties last night.
Some lady didn't like what was on TV...
so she dressed up in a leather spacesuit
and whipped her husband to death.
Yeah, then you guys take care of
Allegra James and her whole family.
We found your library card on the lawn, Georgie.
Someone steal your wallet?
No, we just watched her in the window is all!
We just... we didn't kill her though! We didn't....
Shut up!
Artie... you've known me a long time.
Yeah.
Too long.
Artie, the guy who must've
done it just waltzed out of here.
Belinda!
Freeze!
I swear it, Artie... we saw him there.
You saw him?
Me and Georgie.
We both seen him.
We got a witness that saw two men.
Georgie climbin' on the wall
outside the girl's window... and you.
Wait, wait a minute. Can you
lock the store? The key's in my pocket.
They were taping it, right Georgie?
Yeah, they... we saw them on TV!
Tell it to the judge.
Artie...
was there a camera in there?
How 'bout a VCR?
So what? Everybody's got one.
I got two.
Did you check inside it?
Maybe the tape's still in there.
Hey.
Guy tapes himself
committing a murder,
runs off with the camera
but forgets to take the tape?
C'mon Artie, maybe
something scared this guy off.
C'mon it's a shot, Artie.
For old times' sake.
What's taking 'em so long?
Invisible evidence is hard to find.
It really works.
Movies in our very own home.
I'm glad you're happy with it, Eva.
I hear the Smiths have ordered one too.
Have to keep up with the times...
Forget it Artie, it's not on there.
It's just the movie.
Damn it!
I could've sworn they were recording it.
Artie, take the cuffs off.
I gotta call this girl and
tell her she's with a maniac.
C'mon Artie, I won't run, I swear.
Help! Put that down!
Eva! What're you doing? Help!
Eva!
The number of Matrix One on Central Avenue.
Okay, thanks a lot.
Hey Cosmo, get a load of this.
I'm on TV!
I tell you Artie, there's a
camera here somewhere!
Me and Georgie, we saw
'em right there, on the TV.
God, am I that fat?
Hey Artie, shut that thing off. We could
be recording over the murder right now.
[electronic voices] Artie... Artie... Artie...
[electronic voices] Artie! Artie!! Artie...
[electronic voices] Artie!! Artie! Artie!
[electronic voices] Artie... Artie!! Artie...
[electronic voices] Artie! Artie!! Artie!
[electronic voices] Artie! Artie... Artie!
Gotta be around here somewhere.
You stay put.
Artie, what are you doing?!
Artie, I won't run, I swear!
Artie, you alright?
Artie, what are you nuts or what?
Artie!
Artie.
What happened?
What happened?
Who got shot?
I shot Artie.
- I killed Artie.
- You're shitting me.
Did you find the camera?
No, I'm lookin' all over for it.
All the sudden he starts
makin' this weird face.
Like he wasn't Artie no more.
He starts shootin' at me.
He shot his own partner.
I had to kill him, Georgie.
You shot Artie with his own gun!
Who's gonna believe us now?
Oh man, we're both gonna fry for this.
Hey, shut up! Maybe this'll
show 'em I'm telling the truth.
You recorded it all?
I hope so.
If there wasn't a camera in there
I'm losing my mind.
What are you doing, man?
The store's not that way!
Over!
In!
Over!
In!
Over!
Keep it sharp folks!
In!
Over!
In!
Over!
Ready to run...
And go!
Five, six, seven, arms up!
Good!
Keep it sharp folks!
Watch your form!
Ready for arms only... Ready! And...
Good!
In!
Over!
In!
Over!
Good!
Belinda!
Focus Belinda!
Five, six, seven, and...
Way to kick! Up!
Knees high!
Knees high, ladies!
Go!
Are you gonna follow me
the rest of my life?
Maybe...
if that's what it takes to
keep you away from Victor.
Look, I'm very flattered,
but if you're tring to imply that
my boyfriend's cheating on me
I hardly think it's any of your business.
Not cheating...
killing.
Killing?
Just what exactly do you mean by "killing"?
I mean murder one, babe.
C'mon, let's take a walk.
Cosmo, what are you doing with her?
We gotta get outta here, man,
two muldoons just came by here.
Get in.
No.
Look. I said get in, alright?
Oh God.
Cosmo, wait a minute.
You forgot to put a dime in the meter.
Cop cars don't need dimes.
C'mon, inside.
Ow!
Georgie, flick off the security camera.
Yeah, I still got these
bracelets on, remember?
Put 'em up here.
Cosmo!
Hold it!
Please don't kill me!
Don't make me have to.
C'mon.
Grab this hammer.
Pop those cuffs.
See this? This has got your boyfriend playing
Jack the Ripper in living black and white.
Okay, it should be right
after this part right here.
This lady's doing a perforation job on her
husband with her knitting machine.
C'mon Cosmo, check for muldoons.
Then she sees herself on the screen and
she gets this weird look on her face.
What are you doing?
C'mon, this is no time to watch a movie.
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda... Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda! Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda! Belinda!! Belinda!
Georgie!
The security cameras went back on.
No, that isn't possible.
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda! Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda!! Belinda! Belinda...
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda! Belinda...
Cosmo, look out!
What are you doin'?!
What are you doin'?!
Georgie!
Chuck the tape!
Georgie!
Georgie!
That's exactly what just
happened with Artie.
Something about this movie.
Makes you lose control,
just like the display says!
C'mon Cosmo, don't crack up on me now, huh?
"A young man discovers an evil alien
plot and must race against time..."
"to save mankind from self-destruction."
Aliens...
that's what was controlling
the woman in the movie.
Yeah, what was controlling her?
I could have killed you.
He should have killed you.
C'mon.
You got any more copies of this?
Uh...
Uh, yeah, just the one
that Victor guy rented.
Your boyfriend Victor's got the other copy.
Check inside.
Take this.
Keep an eye on her.
Don't move! Just...
you better not move.
Good afternoon, madamoiselle.
Can I get a ticket?
Oh, no more tickets, sir.
Too many cars were getting stolen.
Do me a favor and lock these doors,
I got some very serious suits in there.
Will do, sir!
Enjoy your lunch.
Get in.
Ow!
Nice.
C'mon! I said get in.
C'mon.
Thank you!
Give yourselves up, if you're
innocent you shouldn't run.
We gotta prove it first.
Wait a minute. That Victor guy
doesn't have the only one of these.
That guy handing out sample cassettes
must have given 'em to other stores.
Where's the nearest video store?
Uh... Satellite Video on Ardsley Road.
No, no.
You stay with her.
And watch for muldoons.
Get outta my seat.
C'mon.
Hello?
Is there a manager around?
I'm the manager...
eat shit and die!
Georgie!
Shoot him!
What?!
Shoot him.
What?!
The gun!
No! Not me! Him!
Shoot him!
Shoot him!
Shoot him!
Shit!
Shit!
Hit him!
Shit!
With the gun!
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Cosmo!
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo... Cosmo!!
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo!! Cosmo!!
[electronic voices] Cosmo!! Cosmo!! Cosmo!!
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo! Cosmo!
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo!! Cosmo!
Lucky so far only the samples went out.
I think they just did that to create some
kind of hype, get a demand going.
Those displays are sure doing the trick.
Remember? I was getting ready
to order another dozen.
Well let's just tell all the video stores.
Do you know how many video stores
there are in this country?
Country? The whole friggin' world!
Whose makin' these tapes?
Belinda, check the box.
Polaris Video.
Let's get our hands on a phone book
and find out their address.
Cosmo.
Hey, lock 'em up. I don't want
this guy's suits gettin' robbed.
Do you think they're open?
I see some people in there.
Yeah. It's Saturday.
They're never gonna let us just snoop
around in there, we need a plan.
Nobu Hashimoto, report to Operations.
Nobu Hashimoto, report to Operations.
Mitsu Narahara to Security Office immediately.
This is your limited run facility.
Now what do I mean by limited run?
That's your fifty to perhaps
two hundred unit cassette order.
I see.
Uh, what's the title of the project, Mr. uh....
McNuttany.
Uh...
It's a how-to. How, how to...
How to be Jane Fonda.
Yeah.
Sure sounds different enough.
Are you kidding?
There's nothing like it on the market.
I take it you're going to be the star.
Yeah, we're gonna have the whole friggin' world
looking like Jane Fonda before we're done.
Well I imagine that'll require
quite a cassette order.
Well the main duplicating room
is right this way, people.
Akita Yoshida to Editing Bay Number Three.
Wow.
Wait til Mrs. McNuttany hears
about this, she's gonna cream.
Right now all the completed
tapes are being gathered,
and fresh ones are being put in
for the next taping cycle.
So, uh, what is it you're taping here?
Maybe something we've heard of?
If you haven't, you will soon.
Wait! Wait! Don't go up there!
Wait!
Hey you! Shut that tape!
Shut the door.
Lock it.
Your cassettes are
destroying innocent people.
Somehow I get the feeling we're not
breaking any news to these guys.
Cassette don't destroy.
People destroy.
Right Mr. Denver?
Oh you're in on this too, huh?
Everyone at Polaris Video serves
the Master Controller.
Master Controller?
The way up there.
The shining star in the heavens.
Look, who do you think
you're talking to, pal?
There's no bullets in there.
You think we'd let you in
here with a loaded gun?
We were expecting you.
Come on.
Enjoy the movie.
Your Earthling technology has
evolved too far! It must be stopped!
Remote Control has spread
throughout your planet!
Now my friends, it's your turn
to give in to the control.
[electronic voices] Ray... Gina... Ray...
[electronic voices] Gina... Ray! Gina!
[electronic voices] Ray... Gina... Ray!
[electronic voices] Gina! Ray... Gina...
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Belinda...
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Belinda! Belinda...
Don't do it.
Don't let 'em control you.
Denver!
Look in the monitor.
Look at yourself!
Don't listen to him!
Shoot the bastard!
Enough!
Victor did not resist darkness.
No!
It's all my fault.
I bought the rights to Remote Control.
I thought it was just another movie.
How do we stop 'em?
Destroy all the tapes.
But you gotta get every one of 'em.
It only takes one tape...
to make thousands more.
Why did they pick home videos
to destroy mankind?
Holy Christ.
That old movie gave the real
aliens up there the friggin' idea!
Cosmo, shoot a hole in this thing.
- Where are they?
- Up there!
My back!
Oh God, Georgie!
Stop them!
They're headed towards Operations!
Run movie.
But the Controller does not allow...
The Controller is dead!
Come on! Let's go!
I am now Controller.
I serve the Master Controllers.
Stop them!
They're heading towards Operations!
Let's go!
Move!
Come on.
Air freight trucks... they're shipping copies of
Remote Control all over the world.
Cosmo, you gotta stop 'em.
Oh Jesus, Georgie, you're bleedin' real bad.
C'mon, we can get you outta here.
Cosmo....
I'm right here, Georgie.
You're gonna make a lovely couple.
Don't talk, George, we're gonna get
you outta here, man. Save your breath.
Oh Georgie....
Georgie?
C'mon. C'mon, Georgie.
C'mon, Georgie, don't do this to me man!
Gonna get you outta here.
C'mon.
Get outta here! Now!
Where are they?
He's headed for the tanks!
Stop them!
Wait! Ray!
No!
Wait, Cosmo!
Stop!
How many truckloads of
Remote Control went out?
This is the first load.
Get outta here.
Drive!
Go!
Cosmo, where are we going?
Video stores.
Here's ours, it's got a circle around it.
What's that mean?
Two more stores got circled.
Vid-O-Rama...
and Satellite Video.
Circles mean reorders.
Then we'll go to Vid-O-Rama and
take care of their samples...
and that'll be the end of Remote Control.
Cosmo.
Cosmo.
Cosmo, c'mon!
Get down!
You too!
What's that display doing there?
Why did you aim it at my eyes?
I'm sorry, but you're going to have
to get away from the counter.
Oh, don't worry, it's not a holdup.
I didn't aim it at your eyes,
they did... those kids!
I had it at the back of the
store and they moved it!
Belinda, no!
Get away from that
display, it's not normal.
See it?
It controlled them to put it there.
It knew I was comin'.
Gimme that tape!
We need to know who rented
your other two copies of Remote Control.
Their addresses too.
He can't control himself.
Shut up!
Belinda...
[in unison] Belinda...
Look...
you gotta help us.
Who's got the other tapes?
[in unison] Belinda...
One's at the Retro Club...
the other one's out to
a Patricia DeClemente.
What?
Patricia...
[in unison] Patricia... Patricia...
Patricia who?
My sister. My nephew's got that tape!
Ow!
And why don't you guys go home
and watch a tape too?
He'll either call or he'll show up sooner or later.
They always do.
What they?
He's no murderer, I oughta know my own brother better than you guys.
Cosmo's not coming,
and he's definitely not calling.
There's something wrong with this movie.
I feel so strange!
Cute.
How do you want your coffee?
Black.
Remote Control?
Here, take this.
I'll meet you back here, okay?
Of all the asses to pick to save the world,
I don't know how they ever picked mine.
Ours.
[in unison] Belinda... Belinda... Belinda...
I changed my mind, I'd like milk.
Eva! What are you doing?! No!
Eva!
Mom, I'm on TV!
[electronic voices] Matthew... Matthew... Matthew...
[electronic voices] Matthew... Matthew. Matthew...
[electronic voices] Matthew! Matthew. Matthew...
[electronic voices] Matthew! Matthew... Matthew!!
Hi Uncle Cosmo.
No!
Police! Freeze!
Stand back, lady. Stand back!
No, Cosmo!
Why did you come home, Cosmo?
Hey!
Come here!
Get outta the way!
Shut the tape!
You gotta shut the tape!
Listen to me everyone!
Hey Controller! You see this?!
C'mon. Let's get outta here.
Let go!
Are you crazy?
Belinda, what is going on?
What started this?
Oh, come on.
Don't play innocent with me.
You killed that family.
No... that was the guys in the video store.
It was on the news!
You told Polaris Video we were coming!
When they said that you were seen with
them,
I thought for sure you were kidnapped.
It's okay.
You're safe now.
Let's get in the car.
I'll drive you home.
Belinda!
C'mon Belinda, please be home.
Please be home.
Who is it?
It's me! Cosmo!
It ain't easy being an Earthling.
Did you get the tape from the Retro?
No, but I watched it burn.
I have Victor's copy though.
What?
Where'd you get that?
From Victor...
he gave it to me.
Just like that.
Just like that.
Cosmo... he saved my life too.
Got a hammer?
Yeah, right down there in the
drawer on the right.
Where you going?
I need a real hammer.
[electronic voices] Cosmo... Cosmo... Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo. Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo! Cosmo...
Oh! There you are.
What's wrong?
That's not the tape.
It's playin' in there right now.
[electronic voices] Belinda... Belinda... Belinda.
[electronic voices] Belinda. Belinda! Belinda...
You set me up!
So it was all just a plan from the start?
You and me?
Just a stinking lie?
Hey Cosmo.
Want a slice?
You've been wondering how the movie ended.
Haven't you, Cosmo?
Well, let's see...
the hero gives in to the Control,
and the Master Controllers destroy mankind.
Who... who is that?
Who's there?
Oh, Cosmo!
Oh, I'm so glad you're okay.
Is Matthew alright?
Victor... where is he?
He's in the garage, taking a long rest.
Why don't the lights work?
I shut the juice to stop the tape player!
What?
Don't give me "what"!
Don't lie to me anymore!
I'm not!
I remember...
Victor, he... he dropped me home, and...
and... he kept telling me
the whole time that you
were a murderer...
and he was so convincing, I...
I just let him in the house.
The next thing I knew, he...
Oh, he had the tape on.
Cosmo...
whatever I might have said,
it wasn't me.
Cosmo...
I love you.
[electronic voices] Cosmo. Cosmo!
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo! Cosmo...
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo!! Cosmo.
[electronic voices] Cosmo! Cosmo. Cosmo...
Cosmo?
Cosmo...
Did you put the power back on?
Hey, c'mon in. The coast is clear.
Hey baby.
You found the gun.
Great!
We still might need it.
Hey, what're you doin'?
I told you, it's over.
C'mon now. Give me the gun.
Why don't I trust you, you're different!
You trust me...
remember?
Our love is non-provisional.
No strings attached.
Come on.
Gimme the gun.
You little bitch!
You're gonna die!
Look at us!
You're trying to kill me!
And I'm trying to kill you!
Cosmo, they don't care who
dies as long as they win!
You!
You hear me?
You don't kill my friends...
You don't mess with my people!
Nobody fucks with this planet!
You got that?!
Nobody!
I wonder how the original movie ended?
Are you kidding?
Just like this.
We win.
No, we win... Cosmo.