Secrets of Sugar Baby Dating (2019) Movie Script
This programme contains some
strong language.
What is it that you do, then?
I maintain a relationship
with these men.
So it has all the elements
of a normal relationship?
Yeah, just I'm being
financially supported.
I'm Tiffany Sweeney,
and I'm going to be stepping
into the world of sugar dating.
I'm putting myself out there for men
to just look at me and decide
if they think they want
to offer me something.
I go undercover and try
sugar dating for myself...
..joining over 3.5 million people
using sugar dating websites
here in the UK.
I'm scared.
So, uh, I'm just going to be like...
Sugar babies aim to find rich sugar
daddies or mummas who'll give them
a monthly allowance.
They can receive thousands
of pounds in cash,
as well as expensive gifts.
I think a lot of sugar babies
desire name-brand products,
specifically luxurious
brands such as Chanel.
But what are some sugar babies
expected to give in return?
No, he just spelled it out.
He's just said
"fucking in all its varied forms."
The websites say sugar
dating is a way
to pay off debts and network.
Do you accept that you are
facilitating sex for money
on your website?
No, absolutely not.
But how easy is it to start sugar
dating and end up in sex work?
You have all this money in your
hand, and you just had sex
for 20 minutes.
For 20 minutes, why am I not
going to do this again?
I feel like I've
entered the world of sex work.
INTERCOM BUZZES
I was going to meet an 18-year-old
sugar baby.
Hello. Hi, welcome. Hi. I'm Tiffany.
Valentina.
Nice to meet you.
She goes by the name Valentina.
I've got quite a few
friends here in London,
so it's good to make friends
because it means you can crash
a little bit easier when you've been
out partying and stuff.
She dates men for money.
At the moment, I'm meeting guys
on a pay-per-meet basis,
we just go for dinner, that's it.
Call it a night.
Dinner. Cocktails. Goodbye.
I ask for a sum of money
for the date.
You know what I mean? It costs,
all the effort I've put in to get
glammed up and stuff for him.
If I like him, we get along,
maybe then he is a POT,
a potential sugar daddy.
Valentina currently has seven sugar
daddies who give her a monthly
allowance, known in the sugar dating
world as an arrangement.
Most of her sugar
daddies are over 40,
more than twice her age.
I can never level with boys my age,
because their motives
are different to mine.
They would rather sit
at home and play Fifa.
Do the men like the fact
that you're young, then?
Yeah, of course they do.
They don't want a woman that's
going to come to them grumbling
with problems, with, you know,
stresses of her life.
They want to meet a girl that brings
and injects youthfulness back
into their lives.
You know some guys like the
schoolgirl kind of fantasy.
So sometimes there is role playing
involved. It's interesting sex.
It's not just...you know.
How do you feel when you do that?
When you dress up as a schoolgirl?
I enjoy it too. It's fun.
I act like a schoolgirl, you know.
I am a schoolgirl, I'm at college,
but you know what I mean?
I was going to show you, actually,
what I picked up the other day. OK.
It's just like a baby doll
kind of... It's really cute.
My pyjamas don't look like this.
Valentina has been gifted lots of
clothes by her sugar daddies.
This dress literally
makes me feel a million dollars.
Sexy.
This one is a bit more out there.
This is what I tend to wear
to the top clubs in London.
This is a Dsquared dress.
I was gifted it by one of my SDs.
It's got a mark on it from where
I spilt a lot of alcohol
on it last night.
So, how much is this?
Expensive.
How expensive?
Over the grand mark.
It was more or less just
like a gift one day.
A pretty generous gift, isn't it?
It's lovely. Yeah.
When I see something I like,
I will gesture him,
I will touch him on the shoulder,
make eye contact.
Everything that you do
considered flirting,
I will make him associate shopping
with sexual things, because men
are sexual creatures.
My relationships with
these men are sexual.
I'm not going to lie about it.
Of course I want to sleep with them.
Of course I want to rip
their clothes off.
Just like any normal relationship.
Tonight, Valentina has a date
with another potential sugar daddy.
You know, the average sugar baby
takes, like, 3,000 a month
from one guy.
Are you the average sugar baby?
I don't know. Am I?
PHONE RINGS
Hello?
Oh, well, I'm just in
the middle of something.
Can I call you back?
You OK? Yeah, I'm fine.
Thank you for asking.
Always.
OK, bye. Just a normal guy.
I just saw him at the casino,
and he asked if I wanted a drink,
and I said OK. Do you want to be
friends with him?
Yeah, maybe.
I don't know.
He's a lot older,
and he's got a wife.
So that's also a massive no-go.
Valentina's favourite
sugar daddy is 47.
She hopes to marry
him when he retires.
I think he's really fit.
Yeah.
So how often do you see
him a month, then?
Probably three times in a month.
Not a lot. So you only see him
three times a month? Mm-hm.
And you're getting, roughly,
I'm just going to gauge
about three grand, four grand?
You want me to not smile?
I was expecting you to say you see
him, like, three or four
times a week. He's a busy guy.
That's a lot of money, isn't it?
PHONE RINGS
Hello?
How are you?
I'm going to have to call
you back, is that OK?
OK, bye-bye.
Usually, generally talking
for myself, I won't meet anyone
unless I've been speaking
with them for weeks.
Some girls just do escorting,
but they just sugar-coat it.
You know what I mean?
You're saying that they do
sugar-coated sex work,
so what is it that you do, then?
I maintain a relationship
with these men.
So, it has all the elements
of a normal relationship?
Yeah, just I'm being
financially supported.
That's literally it to a T.
Valentina is a fashion student.
Her goal is to find the right sugar
daddies to help her build
her own brand.
For me, it's not about the money
they're giving to me,
it's about how I use that money
to make myself
financially independent.
OK, well, take care.
You too. It was lovely to meet you.
Have a good evening. You too.
Valentina had said that sugar
dating was about creating
an emotional connection.
But for me, what she's doing -
dating men for money -
seemed very close to sex work.
I can't believe how
blase she is about it.
So, like, we've established that it's
all the elements of, like,
a normal relationship, but it's just
the fact that she has...
..they're paying her for her time.
But she says it so casually,
and I'm like,
"That's the biggest thing!"
I want to be like,
"Hello, they're paying you!"
Valentina had met most
of the men she dates online.
Seeking Arrangement claims
to be the world's largest
sugar dating website.
It even has its own
Sugar Baby University page,
specifically aimed at students.
It says, "Join nearly half a million
students in the UK who have turned
"to sugar daddies to avoid student
debt and secure a better future."
To get their free premium
membership, all you need
is a university e-mail address.
It says, on average,
she would actually receive a monthly
allowance of 2,900
among other benefits.
And the benefits include
networking opportunities,
career or business advantages.
This is opening
you to a world of men.
They know that students
are struggling.
With over half a million students
sugar dating in the UK,
I want to find out what kind
of support the universities
are offering.
Kent University
agreed to talk to me.
Sugar dating website
Seeking Arrangement claims
it has over 1,000 students
signed up at this university,
the highest in the UK.
We're going to talk about class
as we understand it,
and then we're going to talk
about class as it is represented.
Caitlin is a lecturer
in media and culture.
Through the Me Too movement,
which has been a very powerful
movement, we have talked
about women who don't want sex,
but we really don't want to talk
about this grey area where women
are potentially exchanging sexual
interactions for money.
And the problem with not talking
about it is then we can't
support young people.
If we are not supporting them,
we are not enabling good choices.
We are letting them down.
Sugar dating websites tend to claim
that it's all above board,
but not a lot of information
is provided on these sites.
We don't hold them
accountable in any way.
This is why we see specific
targeting of young people.
Women are more accessible than ever
before, and people who want to abuse
that access can do
that quite freely.
Caitlin has an open-door policy,
and is beginning to see students
who want advice on sugar dating.
What were the main reasons
that you went on these sites?
I was curious, because at the time
I had no money, and I was
like, "Oh, I need quick money
for my rent."
My friend spoke to me
about what she does.
She started off sending pictures
of her feet and then of her body.
At first, she would use someone
else's pictures, like get online.
So her account was fake on this
site, but then it got to the point
where she would meet
up with the person.
She would get
300 in, like, a day.
Some people want company,
so you'd meet the person,
just have dinner with them,
talk to them for a few hours.
Other people would want maybe
sex or a relationship.
It's just easy money.
I could get 500 and my rent done,
and I could do it three
times a week.
Obviously as a student,
it's very difficult with money.
I don't have a full-time job,
I work part time, and I'd get
less than that in a whole month.
And obviously, with rent to pay,
living costs, it is really
difficult, and seeing friends
do it,
it's quite tempting.
So, what would you say
is one of the main reasons
that this has become
so popular with students?
Like being a part of Instagram,
Twitter, so many social media...
..public figures,
like seeing their lifestyle,
it's like, "Oh, I want that,
I want instant money as well."
Do you think sugar daddy sites
are becoming as similar as Tinder
and PlentyofFish,
like normal dating sites?
100%, definitely, definitely.
But I just think the repercussions
aren't really spoken about,
even in uni or between friends,
it's difficult to talk
about without being judged.
Yasmin has now decided not to
start sugar dating.
Bye.
The websites I spoke to were clear
that sugar dating is about mutually
beneficial relationships,
and not about sex for cash.
But by specifically targeting
cash-strapped students,
I wondered how many ended
up on the sites out of financial
desperation, vulnerable
to the offers from much older
wealthy men or women.
Hiya. Nice to meet you.
Is it Tiffany or Tiff?
Tiffany is fine. Tiffany, OK.
Yeah. It's nice here.
Is it close to your uni?
It's not too far.
It's not too far at all.
Within months of starting
university in Nottingham,
22-year-old Luke found himself
running out of cash.
I was in my first year,
coming up to Christmas,
and realising I only just had enough
money to pay for rent,
and very little left over for food
and things like that,
and one of my friends at university,
I kind of noticed that she was
wearing new clothes
and things like that.
She was like, "Oh, well, I've been
kind of seeing a guy,
"you know, he's got a bit of money."
I kind of asked, sort of
sarcastically, whether you know,
"Oh, you've got a sugar daddy,
then?" And she was like,
"Well, yeah, I do."
I started thinking about whether I
could do sort of something similar,
so I set up profiles on sites,
and I started to get quite
a few messages from different men,
went on a date with them.
And what was that like, when you went
on your first date?
To be honest,
I was absolutely terrified.
He's quite a bit older than me,
we'd go for dinner,
go for drinks.
After a few dates,
Luke agree to have sex.
How did you feel
after the first time?
I felt sick, really, but I needed
the money,
so I kind of just kept going.
The focus was always the money?
Yes, yes.
Luke now has a regular sugar
daddy in his mid-50s.
They meet once a week.
The arrangement I have at
the moment, my sugar daddy will pay
for dinner, but if I have sex
with him, he pays me 60,
70 an hour.
Being almost romantically involved
with someone that is older than me,
it's kind of...
..how uncomfortable
that sometimes does make me feel,
and kind of the shame
of that, almost.
You don't enjoy any
aspect of it, do you?
Not particularly, no.
It's pretending to be
a normal relationship.
Maybe how I act around them
isn't how I actually
feel about them.
At the end of the day, it's just an
act that I put on to make
them think it's something real.
Do you think you're coping?
I kind of just block it out, really,
and just say, you know,
this doesn't define me.
Sometimes afterwards,
you kind of do want to just go
and get back in bed and sort of
curl up by yourself just to
make yourself feel better, really.
God.
Luke's family have no idea
that he's in this situation,
and he doesn't feel
he can talk to them.
I know they struggle
financially as well,
and I don't want to put that
pressure on them, or sort of let
them know that I am struggling,
and sort of make them feel guilty.
Luke feels that he can't talk
to anyone about his sugar dating.
Being paid for sex isn't
illegal in the UK,
but Luke is afraid he will be
judged and face the same stigma
as sex workers.
I want to find out for myself
what it's like to be a sugar baby.
"A site you can trust,
introducing wealthy men to beautiful
"women since 2002."
I'm going undercover
by creating a profile posing
as an 18-year-old student.
Adriana.
It sounds like an 18-year-old.
If I was 18 again,
that's what I would be.
I am officially going
to become a sugar baby.
There I am.
Adriana.
That's literally it.
Just name, date of birth.
Now they've sent me
an activation e-mail.
That was so easy.
There's no verification,
it's just...
You could basically be
anybody you want to be.
I'm sociable and fun-loving.
I have a passion for life.
I like that, "I have a passion for
life."
I'm looking to meet new people.
Marital status, married but looking.
That's like a normal thing now
for these websites.
"Choose at least one tag that will
define what you are seeking
"for in a relationship."
Luxury lifestyle,
emotional connection, attentive...
You're basically telling
girls straight away you can't get
through life, or you can't manage
anything, without a rich man.
It's basically putting
a price on women.
I can buy you,
I can buy your time,
I can buy...
..a shag.
Preferred ages, so 40 to 60.
Looking for men who are just
around my dad's age.
You are talking 50-,
60-year-old men specifically
looking for 18-year-olds.
The websites clearly state
the minimum age is 18.
Escorting, prostitution
and human trafficking
are all prohibited.
But age verification and background
checks are not compulsory
for standard members.
In 2014, the world of sugar dating
hit the headlines when sex worker
Alix Tichelman was found guilty
of the involuntary manslaughter
of Google executive Forest Hayes.
They met on a sugar dating website.
Police are referring
to Alix Tichelman as a prostitute,
so how was she allowed on your site?
Well, the fact is we actually
did a background image search,
which we do to all members to make
sure they are not on any escorting
or prostitutional websites.
Her profile didn't raise any red
flags, nor was there anything
within the contents of her profile
to indicate that she was using
the site for these purposes.
And in 2016, former Dragons' Den
star Doug Richard was found
not guilty of sexual activity with
a 13-year-old girl he met
on a sugar dating site.
On her profile,
she lied about her age,
stating she was 17.
This was not picked
up by the website.
New York, the City of Dreams.
In most US states,
sex work is illegal.
Thank you.
The USA has over 17 million people
on sugar dating websites.
One of them was
26-year-old Chandler.
She moved to the Big Apple to make
it in the fashion industry
and clear her student debt.
Hi!
Hello.
I did, like, everything that you do
when you move to New York
and you have no money.
You don't eat a lot, you get
1 pizza, you do what you can.
If you want to have a good life
in New York, you have to figure out
a side hustle.
So I discovered sugar dating,
and it was easy.
You just got on a site and guys
immediately start talking to you,
and they start offering you money.
At first, I thought
you could just go on a date,
there was one guy, he'd give me
200, but if you wanted to make
more money, you then had to sleep
with them.
Chandler was paid 800 for sex.
She knew it was
sex work and illegal.
When you get the cash,
it's this exhilarating feeling.
You have all this money in
your hand, and you just had sex
for 20 minutes.
And like, I make that amount of
money in two weeks in New York,
so it's like, for 20 minutes,
why am I not going to do this again?
But with so much money on offer,
it was a risk she took.
When I got really desperate
for rent was when I tried
it again in March.
Was it the same amount
you got offered? No, it was more.
This time, she says she was offered
1,200 by Ron, who said
he was an investment banker.
And he wanted a threesome,
so Chandler asked a close friend.
So, we're like in the cab getting
ready, and doing some of our make-up
in the car as we were headed
towards him, cos we were a little
crunched for time.
He wanted, like, nude lips,
smoky eye, nice lashes,
he had me get my hair done,
and a very, like, simple lingerie,
like just a thong and a bra.
Like just a nice dress.
And like a high pair of heels.
What should perhaps have rung alarm
bells for Chandler was that Ron
asked her to find
and book a hotel room.
He'd made sure that it was
confirmed, it was booked,
it was paid for, cos he asked me
to send a screenshot of it.
Ron assured Chandler
he'd pay her back.
Did you think it was strange
that you had to organise everything?
I didn't, because he explained
it as the last time
he had a sugar baby,
the arrangement,
she was more of his assistant,
so she would always
take care of things for him,
cos he was so busy.
Ron was very specific -
the hotel had to be close
to the Jay St-MetroTech subway.
Which way do we go now?
A short walk from
a local university.
So we go the hotel,
and he is sitting in the lobby,
he doesn't look like his picture,
we go up to the room,
and he is like, "OK, get out
your phone and I will pay you."
Because he wanted to pay us
through PayPal.
So I signed into PayPal,
and he was like,
"OK, you are going to request..."
Like whatever, like 2,500 or 2,600,
and...
So he goes to request it and he's
like,
"OK, so everything is all set."
And like we put our phone away.
And then he's like, "OK, like,
take off your clothes."
And then the act happens,
and he is like... He's really into
power dynamics, so he wanted
you to be super submissive,
and super thankful of him giving
you all this money,
and he kind of just took turns
with us, and had us all to himself,
and did what he wanted.
Yeah.
We like felt good after, because we
were like, "OK, it's over,
"we just made 1,200,
this is great."
And then on the subway ride home,
I'm looking at my account,
and I'm like, "I don't see the
money. When are you going to accept
"the request?" cos he didn't
actually accept it, and silence.
And then he disappeared.
What was that like, when you realised
he's not going to give
me this money? My heart dropped.
It just...it just sunk in my chest
and I was like, "Oh, my God.
"Now I'm actually in debt,
now I can't pay my rent."
Believing she'd broken the law,
Chandler felt she couldn't
report Ron.
Did you ever think about going
to the police when it happened?
I'm getting paid to have sex,
which is illegal in America,
so they don't have any sympathy
for you unless you are raped
or taken advantage of sexually.
He manipulated me, it's like
emotional rape, in a way.
Like, he's just this master
manipulator that takes advantage
of young women who, like, are in
desperate situations.
If it's so difficult,
and you have to keep reliving it,
why are you so driven
to tell your story?
I can warn women
there is a really dangerous side
to sugar dating,
it's emotionally damaging,
and it's risk behaviour.
Every time you go up
to that hotel room,
you don't know what can happen.
What impact has this
had on your life?
Well, I mean, it lives with me
for ever.
So whoever I date next,
at some point, I have to tell them,
"Hey, like, I had sex for money."
You kind of wonder if you are going
to find someone who will accept
that part of you.
Honestly, someone who
really cares about you,
they will never judge you,
and there is people out there,
I just want you to know,
I personally just want you to know
that, cos there is people, honestly.
What you've been through... There is
good people that will, you know,
no matter what you've been through
or what's happened,
that will not judge you.
Yeah, and I have to remind myself,
like, I don't want to date anyone
that would judge me for that. Yeah.
Chandler reported Ron
to the sugar dating website,
but they banned her for violating
the terms and conditions
by accepting money for sex.
To warn other women,
Chandler went to the press.
Katie Rosman, a features reporter
at the New York Times,
ran the story.
I felt like there were issues
of consent involved.
What it means to say yes,
I really felt like this fell
into a grey area that wasn't
being talked about, because women
are afraid to come forward.
You spoke to the sugar
daddy, what did he say?
He remembered meeting these two
women in a hotel room in Brooklyn,
but that he didn't remember
ever promising to give them money.
I said, "Well, why are you on a
website about sugar dating
"if there's not going to be some
financial component?"
And he really didn't have an answer.
I said, "Well, why did you say
you were an investment banker,
"when you're not
an investment banker?"
And he said, "Because I thought
it would be a good way to meet
"a girl and get somebody to have
sex with me."
By not paying, what we had was
a married father who cheated
on his wife and hadn't
broken the law.
After the article published,
I heard from a number of women
who told me that they had had
the exact same thing happen to them
with the exact same man.
He had refined this technique
over the years, so Chandler wasn't
just some dummy who got hoodwinked,
she was someone who fell victim
to a predator.
Katie then ran a follow-up article
revealing the true identity
of the sexual predator
as Imran Khan, a 36-year-old
graduate student
at New York University's
Center for Urban Science
and Progress in Brooklyn...
..just a minute's walk away
from Jay St-MetroTech subway.
His university is literally
walking distance away.
He was meeting these
girls in the daytime.
Was he just popping out
on his lunch break,
having sex with these girls,
knowing that he wasn't going to pay
them, and then just
walking back into class?
After the New York Times
article was published,
more than a dozen women with similar
stories reached out to Chandler.
Imran Khan had used sugar dating
website Seeking Arrangement
to meet most of them.
In the article, a spokesperson
from the website said that Imran's
IP address was blocked, and he was
banned from using their website.
But two months later,
he struck again, tricking at least
three women in three days...
..this time using the name Ty.
The women were too afraid to speak
openly, but one of them did give me
Imran's number.
Back at my hotel room,
I give him a call to see
if he'll agree to an interview.
No answer.
PHONE CHIMES
Oh, my God.
Fuck.
He's messaged.
He just wants to know who it is.
He wants to know who I am,
but he's still existing,
he's still around.
He's text again.
He's just put,
"I don't know any Tiffany."
I feel sick, cos I think
he just thinks I'm another girl
that he is going to do this with.
That's what he's thinking.
He genuinely just thinks I'm a girl
he's probably met online.
PHONE RINGS
Later that night, Imran called me.
Hello, is that Imran?
Your name came up in
a New York Times article,
and I just wanted to speak
to you about sugar dating.
Oh, you are not familiar
with the New York Times article?
Yeah, so sugar dating.
Well, it would be better
if we could meet up in person,
and then we could talk about it.
He hung up.
He's like so friendly
and high-pitched.
Like, "Hi! This is Ty.
Hi!" Like, so normal and nice.
Not even like,
"Why have you got my number?
"Why are you ringing me?"
I would expect that, like,
anger, just,
"Think you've got the wrong number.
"Oh, no, I don't know
anything about that."
Just so calm, it's scary.
That's exactly what Chandler
said, and I get it now.
We eventually tracked
down Imran Khan.
He says he didn't speak to me
on the phone, and is not aware
of anyone called Ty.
He said sex with Chandler was
consensual, and denied offering
to pay her any money.
We asked him about the other women
with similar complaints,
and he said he was unaware of this.
He also said he had not been active
on any sugar dating sites
for some time.
The man who claims
to have 20 million subscribers
and is behind the world's biggest
sugar dating website has agreed
to speak to me.
It was his website that Imran used
to contact Chandler and the other
girls I spoke to.
I'm about to meet Brandon Wade,
who is the CEO
of Seeking Arrangement.
In interviews, Brandon says
that the reason that he set
up Seeking Arrangement
is because when he was younger,
he struggled to find a girlfriend,
and he said to his mum, "I can't get
"a girl." And she said, "Well,
just focus on your studies, and make
"sure you're rich and successful,
and then the girls will come."
Brandon listened to his mum,
and is reputed to have made a cool
35 million from a string
of controversial sugar dating sites,
like MissTravel,
WhatsYourPrice,
OpenMinded, and of course,
Seeking Arrangement.
He also claims to be the site's
number one sugar daddy, and lives
in a wealthy suburb
on the outskirts of Las Vegas.
Before I speak to him
about Chandler and Imran,
I want to see how a rich
sugar daddy lives.
Hi, I'm Tiffany.
Nice to meet you. Thank you for the
long trip here.
I know, thank you for
letting me into your home.
It's massive.
When I throw parties
or get-togethers,
this is where people
usually hang out.
Oh, so you have a lot
of parties here?
Yeah, I do. I've hosted events
where a bunch of girls,
sugar babies, sort of
come here and hang out. Oh!
So do you all get in the pool?
I do, not at this time of the year,
it's really cold.
But this entire sort
of door sort of slides open.
Let me continue the tour, shall we?
OK, yeah. Yeah.
You have to tell me
about this picture.
This is a picture that was given
to me by my best friend.
Right. He understands the way
to encapsulate what the sugar
lifestyle really stands for.
I think a lot of sugar babies desire
name brand products,
specifically luxurious
brands such as Chanel.
Very nice.
Where is all the stuff?
It's so empty.
Yes.
Is that the look you are going for?
Like a show home?
I like as little clutter
as I can sort of manage.
Right. The minimalist concept
is so attractive to me.
The more things you acquire,
the more you get stressed
out by them. Not if it's a Chanel
bag, though.
Not really, yeah. Those are allowed.
If that makes you feel good,
then that's a separate issue.
And this is our bathroom.
Lovely. You love these open
bathtubs, don't you?
Yeah, yeah.
They're big soaking tubs
that can fit at least two people.
We've actually had four
people in there before.
Four people got in this tub?
Yeah. Like, adults?
I think so. Adults.
What?
Brandon!
For the past year,
48-year-old Brandon has been living
with his 22-year-old
girlfriend Zoey.
Are you going somewhere tonight?
Yeah, the Gwen Stefani concert.
It's kind of like a company
event type of thing.
So you met Brandon through a friend
who was using the website?
A lot of my friends
actually have profiles
and like to use the site.
One girl, I think, two years
ago went to the Oscars,
one of my good friends,
because of a guy she met
on the website, so after that,
all of us were like, "Oh, my God!"
You know, we all, like,
made profiles like that night.
You know, I was really excited
about it.
I guess I found her before she could
progress any further
along that path.
Lucky me.
So, Zoey, would you see
yourself as a sugar baby?
I don't see myself as a sugar baby.
For somehow if he was
to lose all of his money,
I'm so deep in this relationship
and so in love with him now,
that I wouldn't just like leave
and I feel like that
is kind of what, you know,
a sugar baby may do.
Do you get a monthly allowance?
I don't get a monthly allowance,
but do you want to kind
of elaborate on this?
Well, she gets a lot,
so I don't want to make it sound
like she gets nothing.
She has a credit card that she uses
for, obviously, everything
that she wants.
She also has most of
the things paid for,
in terms of every time we travel
or we go out to eat,
I pay for everything. And of course
all the gifts that she gets.
But in addition to that,
what I've done, is I've actually
instead of giving her an allowance,
I've actually put money
in her savings account every time
we hit a specific milestone
in our relationship,
because I want her to feel secure
that if this relationship
doesn't work out,
that she has the resources to be
able to leave if she wants.
And that's one of the key points
that a lot of sugar babies have sort
of commented to me on the website
is that because they're dating a lot
of these older guys,
they feel dependent on them
to the point where they can never
leave because they are constantly
dependent on their support.
And I don't want, I don't ever want
that to happen between us.
Do you still have sugar babies now?
Zoey is my main partner
and my girlfriend.
I do see girls here and there
once in a while if I ever get bored.
So, if you were to define
your relationship then, your set-up,
it would be, what?
I would say that I am polyamorous,
and I have to be honest
with the people that I meet
of my nature, and they can judge
for themselves as to whether
they like me for who I am.
Zoey is your only girlfriend,
but you see other girls?
Yeah, and I would term those other
girls as sugar babies, right.
And when you see the other girls,
what is that like?
Most of the time,
it's simply dinner. OK.
And, you know... So you're not
intimate?
I'm usually not intimate,
because my tastes are extremely
high, just look at Zoey.
People have to measure up,
and it's not always easy
to measure up.
While you've been together,
you have been intimate
with other sugar babies?
Yes, I have.
OK, and Zoey, you're OK with that?
Yeah, I am. I'm just a very
non-jealous person.
And do you do the same?
Meet other guys, intimately?
No, because I'm naturally
monogamous, I have no, like, desire
to meet, you know, to...
Any romance with any other guy.
So what would happen if Zoey
wanted to do the same?
Would you be comfortable with that?
Um, that would depend.
We're thinking of having
kids later this year. Oh, OK.
So I would probably
not be OK with that.
OK. Yeah.
Well, he wouldn't be OK with that,
but it's not like it
would be a deal-breaker.
I think once we get to that bridge,
we shall cross it then.
I just want it to be kind of clear
that if it was a thing,
like, you know, we're in kind
of a deep enough relationship,
that I feel like it wouldn't
dismiss everything that we have.
Brandon has been
married three times.
He has said in previous interviews
that 40% of the sugar daddies
using his website are married.
Well, thank you so much for coming.
Thank you for letting
me in your home.
I will see you tomorrow, see you
tomorrow at the office.
Yes, take care. As long as they're
open with their wives, he calls
it ethical cheating.
He's obviously really wealthy,
and to hear that his home is
4.5 million, he's so rich.
But while we were walking around his
house, and he was showing me
all the nice things
he has and the way he lives his
life, all I could think
about were the sugar babies
I've spoken to, like Chandler,
who have been scammed and exploited.
It's time to check in with my fake
sugar baby profile.
As 18-year-old Adriana,
I've received over 80 messages.
"Looking for a hot young sugar
baby."
"Each meeting 500
to 800 gift for you..."
"Hi, I've recently finished my
previous long-term arrangement
"and supporting her through Uni..."
"Hi, London Girl, you sound
to be just what I'm looking for,
"young, exotic, slim, and petite."
55! I'm 18 on this website.
Before I can start
messaging sugar daddies,
I have to agree with the website's
rules which state I'm not allowed
to receive money for one-off dates,
known as pay-per-meets.
So I'm going to write back
and say hi, tell me more.
Message back.
There are literally
people living on here.
"I'm 49, so you'd have to be
attracted to an older man,
"and be very open
minded and a pleaser."
Oh, my gosh.
The sugar daddy suggests
we chat off the website.
I'm going to give my number and see
what they have to say.
Within minutes,
he contacts me on WhatsApp.
PHONE CHIMES
"I'm looking for a girl I can get
to know and become friends with.
"That's important for me.
"I'd like to meet them three to four
times a month, and we can spend time
"together with a few
hours of intimacy. Kiss."
Interesting.
Define intimacy.
He's typing.
He's so quick.
Oh, my God.
No, he just spelt it out.
He's just said, "Fucking
in all its varied forms."
Can't be more
specific than that, can you?
Not even sex,
like literally fucking.
That is...
I'm going to text back and say,
"What's the arrangement?"
It's not long before he's asking me
to break the rules.
"To begin with, as we get
to know each other,
"are you OK with
a pay-per-meet arrangement?
"I would suggest 150."
Which is what he's done
in previous arrangements.
Look how easy it is.
There is a website that just opens
them up to so many young girls.
He wouldn't be able to rock up at
a university and stand
there cos it would look creepy if
a 50-, 60-year-old man was hanging
outside the gates of a university
campus, but because it's online,
you can just browse and just choose.
It just feels wrong.
None of the websites I looked
at allowed pay-per-meets,
and this policy keeps
them within the law.
Hi. Hi, welcome.
Brandon's office is this way.
This morning, I have the opportunity
to ask Brandon
some difficult questions.
Hi, Brandon. How are you?
Nice to see you again.
Nice to see you again.
You put out, a couple days ago,
a press release which said
that nearly half a million UK
students have signed up as sugar
babies, and the average
they receive is around 3,000.
Do you know how many sugar babies
receive that amount?
Um, we don't exactly know.
I think the way we tabulate
that is through a survey,
as well as through what people put
down on their profiles in terms
of what they are looking for, and,
of course, you know,
that's how we come
up with a number.
Can you accept that potentially
there are students who would be
financially desperate,
and then turn to your website?
Nowhere on the website are we
telling people, "Hey, if you're
"desperate, please come and sign up,
this is the place for you."
In fact, we present an image
that is one of luxury.
You know, the fact is the site
certainly works. If not, why are
these college students signing up in
droves year on year,
and the number's only increasing.
And do you think sugar babies are
having pay-per-meet arrangements?
That's just another short-term,
short form for, perhaps, escorting.
Because what you're doing
is you are paying somebody to spend
time with them.
That is, in our mind, escorting,
and that's not permitted
on our website.
All of the sugar babies that I've
spoken to say they do pay-per-meets.
Do you accept that you are
facilitating sex for money
on your website?
No, absolutely not!
And that's the problem, right,
because any dating website,
you're going to find
that aspect to it.
I have pictures upon pictures
on my phone of Tinder screenshots
and Bumble screenshots
where the women were or are clearly
soliciting sex for money,
but is that the intent
of Tinder or Bumble? No.
I wanted to talk to you about one
specific case that was
in the New York Times.
Katie Rosman spoke to Chandler,
she was using your site,
and she met up with
a sugar daddy in New York,
and he asked her to bring a friend,
and said that he would pay them
for sex, and then they had sex,
and he didn't pay them.
Well, what can I say about
a situation like that?
Well, don't meet a guy
and be paying for sex.
I mean, just don't do it.
So it's her own fault.
I mean, that's all I can say, right?
Never do that.
I mean, you agreed to the terms
of use on the website - to never
accept money for sex,
then why are you doing
that in the first place?
He's offering her 1,000,
2,000 to her and her friends.
That's really appealing.
Well, that is appealing,
but Chandler should know
that there are tonnes of escort
agencies and madams
in New York City willing
to set her up on 5,000 dates
where she can have sex
and be guaranteed payment.
Go do that.
Why is she even on our website?
I mean, to call herself a sugar baby
is simply destroying my community.
I don't want people
like that on my website.
If you want to be a prostitute,
go freaking be a prostitute.
You will get paid that way.
Just don't pretend and be a
sugar baby, because a sugar baby
is not a prostitute.
But you are saying that the girls
are breaking the rules...
Exactly! Isn't the responsibility
with the guys as well?
Both people are breaking the rules,
and again, you're asking me
about, "Oh, these girls are so
desperate and they're so dumb,
"they need to be taught."
They're in college!
They passed the college
entrance exam.
That's quite a bit of education,
don't you think, to know
what is right and wrong?
Chandler reported Imran,
and in October last year,
you said that he was blocked,
and then he actually went
on the website a couple of months
later and did the same thing
to another girl.
You know, the guys are smart too,
and people are smart, right?
Because if you are banned
from a website, what can you do?
Go get a new phone,
cancel your credit card,
get a new credit card,
there are ways around the system.
My concern is, are you doing enough
to protect sugar babies
and sugar daddies?
Yeah, I think after this interview,
I'm going to call my lawyer and file
a lawsuit against him.
So, we'll start with that and then
we'll fix our process,
and then we'll compile a list
of these complete users
who have been banned off the website
that keep coming back,
and we will begin to take more legal
action against them.
So that is what we will start doing.
I get your point.
Very nice. Very nice.
Seeking Arrangement is attempting
to sue Imran Khan for continuously
violating the site's
terms and conditions,
but they are yet to track him down.
Thank you so much
again for meeting me.
Well, thank you again. Have a safe
flight. Take care. Bye-bye.
Further investigation revealed Khan
had already been kicked
off the site 14 times.
It's believed he's not been active
on the website since January 2019.
Back in London, and my sugar baby
inboxes have over 250 messages.
I've had a message
from a guy called Jim.
He said he wants to meet at least
twice a month in a London hotel
for some intimate fun,
and he'll pay me 250.
He contacted me via Sugardaddy.com,
another site that does not allow
pay-per-meets.
Like many of the men
on sugar dating websites,
48-year-old Jim has very few
details on his profile.
He's asked to meet me
tomorrow in a London hotel,
and I have no idea
what he looks like.
I asked for a picture,
but he wouldn't send me one.
PHONE RINGING
But he is happy
to speak on the phone.
Hello?
Hi, how are you?
I'm good, thanks.
Thanks for calling.
Yes.
Um, do you think we could meet
possibly, like, downstairs first
and just have a chat?
Take care. Bye.
He's like, "can we go
straight to the room?"
I have to say no,
I want to talk to you first.
I don't even know
what he looks like.
Imagine meeting someone in a room
and don't even know what they look
like, and then potentially
be intimate with that person.
I'm really shocked at how direct
these guys are with asking me
for sex for money.
On the websites, it says this is an
arrangement, and you get
to have chemistry with someone,
you'll connect with them,
they will provide you mentorship,
but essentially what is happening
is I feel like I've entered
the world of sex work,
and it's through
sugar dating websites.
I'm a bit nervous,
now, about tomorrow.
It's really well concealed.
Nobody ever thinks
you have a hidden camera on. Yeah.
So you are turned on now.
Jim has booked a room
in a central London hotel.
He has no idea I will
be secretly filming.
Thank you.
I'm sorry about yesterday,
cos I was like, "Oh, I just wanted
"to see, like, a picture."
So I was, like, asking for, like,
pictures, but you can't send them.
Is that cos of your job
and stuff or like married?
You're not married, are you?
Oh, OK.
Outside?
Yeah, yeah, OK cool.
Should we sit here?
Oh, thank you.
Being with someone younger or
anything like that, is it better?
Yeah.
So, am I like the first
for you or not?
Oh, OK.
Maybe in a minute, I just need...
I'm still a bit nervous.
I'm just nervous about what will
happen and stuff like that,
like in the room and stuff, that's
why I'm just wanting to know.
OK.
OK.
OK.
So then, it's, like, sex?
OK.
And then...
Then you, like,
I get paid as well?
I'm just trying to get my head
around it, really, cos it's kind
of normal on that website,
cos a lot of them
are, like, messaging for,
like, to meet and stuff.
Is it really?
I'm just going to take a minute.
I'm just going to go to the loo.
Is that OK?
You're going to wait out here, yeah?
OK, cool. I'll just be a sec.
I'm surprised at how vulnerable
and intimidated this situation
is making me feel.
I'm struggling to get
out of the situation.
So I didn't realise how difficult
it is, because he's so nice
and friendly, and he's not creepy,
so it makes it harder to try
and leave cos I feel bad,
because I feel like he spent money
on the hotel and he's so friendly
and nice,
and he's like, "Should we go now?"
And I'm struggling to say,
"No, I'm so sorry, I can't do it."
And he's been up front with me
that he wants sex,
so now I have to go back and say,
"I'm so sorry, I can't do this",
and I'm scared.
So, uh, I'm just going to be like...
I'm just like, I should have said
it then, but I didn't.
Hey.
Oh, my God. I feel so bad, but I
don't think I can do it.
But I'll pay for
the room or whatever.
OK. Thank you so much.
I will let you know. Yeah. OK.
Thank you. Take care.
Bye.
Jim didn't give much away,
but he was clear about why he uses
sugar dating websites.
He just told me that the majority
of people on sugar daddy websites
are there for sex.
That means that this platform
has become a place for older men
to pay young girls for sex.
When I started making
this documentary, I wanted
to understand how different
sugar dating is to escorting
and prostitution.
I personally think sugar
dating is sex work.
I don't think there's
any other way of saying it.
My experience of being
on these websites,
the majority of men on there
want sex of some form.
Whether they sugar-coat
it in an arrangement,
but the majority aren't even
sugar-coating it.
The majority are just saying,
"I want to have sex with you for
money."
I have to say what it is.
I would never judge
anyone for sugar dating,
but from what I've seen,
few sugar babies live a luxury
lifestyle, and there is
a darker side with risks
that should be taken seriously.
strong language.
What is it that you do, then?
I maintain a relationship
with these men.
So it has all the elements
of a normal relationship?
Yeah, just I'm being
financially supported.
I'm Tiffany Sweeney,
and I'm going to be stepping
into the world of sugar dating.
I'm putting myself out there for men
to just look at me and decide
if they think they want
to offer me something.
I go undercover and try
sugar dating for myself...
..joining over 3.5 million people
using sugar dating websites
here in the UK.
I'm scared.
So, uh, I'm just going to be like...
Sugar babies aim to find rich sugar
daddies or mummas who'll give them
a monthly allowance.
They can receive thousands
of pounds in cash,
as well as expensive gifts.
I think a lot of sugar babies
desire name-brand products,
specifically luxurious
brands such as Chanel.
But what are some sugar babies
expected to give in return?
No, he just spelled it out.
He's just said
"fucking in all its varied forms."
The websites say sugar
dating is a way
to pay off debts and network.
Do you accept that you are
facilitating sex for money
on your website?
No, absolutely not.
But how easy is it to start sugar
dating and end up in sex work?
You have all this money in your
hand, and you just had sex
for 20 minutes.
For 20 minutes, why am I not
going to do this again?
I feel like I've
entered the world of sex work.
INTERCOM BUZZES
I was going to meet an 18-year-old
sugar baby.
Hello. Hi, welcome. Hi. I'm Tiffany.
Valentina.
Nice to meet you.
She goes by the name Valentina.
I've got quite a few
friends here in London,
so it's good to make friends
because it means you can crash
a little bit easier when you've been
out partying and stuff.
She dates men for money.
At the moment, I'm meeting guys
on a pay-per-meet basis,
we just go for dinner, that's it.
Call it a night.
Dinner. Cocktails. Goodbye.
I ask for a sum of money
for the date.
You know what I mean? It costs,
all the effort I've put in to get
glammed up and stuff for him.
If I like him, we get along,
maybe then he is a POT,
a potential sugar daddy.
Valentina currently has seven sugar
daddies who give her a monthly
allowance, known in the sugar dating
world as an arrangement.
Most of her sugar
daddies are over 40,
more than twice her age.
I can never level with boys my age,
because their motives
are different to mine.
They would rather sit
at home and play Fifa.
Do the men like the fact
that you're young, then?
Yeah, of course they do.
They don't want a woman that's
going to come to them grumbling
with problems, with, you know,
stresses of her life.
They want to meet a girl that brings
and injects youthfulness back
into their lives.
You know some guys like the
schoolgirl kind of fantasy.
So sometimes there is role playing
involved. It's interesting sex.
It's not just...you know.
How do you feel when you do that?
When you dress up as a schoolgirl?
I enjoy it too. It's fun.
I act like a schoolgirl, you know.
I am a schoolgirl, I'm at college,
but you know what I mean?
I was going to show you, actually,
what I picked up the other day. OK.
It's just like a baby doll
kind of... It's really cute.
My pyjamas don't look like this.
Valentina has been gifted lots of
clothes by her sugar daddies.
This dress literally
makes me feel a million dollars.
Sexy.
This one is a bit more out there.
This is what I tend to wear
to the top clubs in London.
This is a Dsquared dress.
I was gifted it by one of my SDs.
It's got a mark on it from where
I spilt a lot of alcohol
on it last night.
So, how much is this?
Expensive.
How expensive?
Over the grand mark.
It was more or less just
like a gift one day.
A pretty generous gift, isn't it?
It's lovely. Yeah.
When I see something I like,
I will gesture him,
I will touch him on the shoulder,
make eye contact.
Everything that you do
considered flirting,
I will make him associate shopping
with sexual things, because men
are sexual creatures.
My relationships with
these men are sexual.
I'm not going to lie about it.
Of course I want to sleep with them.
Of course I want to rip
their clothes off.
Just like any normal relationship.
Tonight, Valentina has a date
with another potential sugar daddy.
You know, the average sugar baby
takes, like, 3,000 a month
from one guy.
Are you the average sugar baby?
I don't know. Am I?
PHONE RINGS
Hello?
Oh, well, I'm just in
the middle of something.
Can I call you back?
You OK? Yeah, I'm fine.
Thank you for asking.
Always.
OK, bye. Just a normal guy.
I just saw him at the casino,
and he asked if I wanted a drink,
and I said OK. Do you want to be
friends with him?
Yeah, maybe.
I don't know.
He's a lot older,
and he's got a wife.
So that's also a massive no-go.
Valentina's favourite
sugar daddy is 47.
She hopes to marry
him when he retires.
I think he's really fit.
Yeah.
So how often do you see
him a month, then?
Probably three times in a month.
Not a lot. So you only see him
three times a month? Mm-hm.
And you're getting, roughly,
I'm just going to gauge
about three grand, four grand?
You want me to not smile?
I was expecting you to say you see
him, like, three or four
times a week. He's a busy guy.
That's a lot of money, isn't it?
PHONE RINGS
Hello?
How are you?
I'm going to have to call
you back, is that OK?
OK, bye-bye.
Usually, generally talking
for myself, I won't meet anyone
unless I've been speaking
with them for weeks.
Some girls just do escorting,
but they just sugar-coat it.
You know what I mean?
You're saying that they do
sugar-coated sex work,
so what is it that you do, then?
I maintain a relationship
with these men.
So, it has all the elements
of a normal relationship?
Yeah, just I'm being
financially supported.
That's literally it to a T.
Valentina is a fashion student.
Her goal is to find the right sugar
daddies to help her build
her own brand.
For me, it's not about the money
they're giving to me,
it's about how I use that money
to make myself
financially independent.
OK, well, take care.
You too. It was lovely to meet you.
Have a good evening. You too.
Valentina had said that sugar
dating was about creating
an emotional connection.
But for me, what she's doing -
dating men for money -
seemed very close to sex work.
I can't believe how
blase she is about it.
So, like, we've established that it's
all the elements of, like,
a normal relationship, but it's just
the fact that she has...
..they're paying her for her time.
But she says it so casually,
and I'm like,
"That's the biggest thing!"
I want to be like,
"Hello, they're paying you!"
Valentina had met most
of the men she dates online.
Seeking Arrangement claims
to be the world's largest
sugar dating website.
It even has its own
Sugar Baby University page,
specifically aimed at students.
It says, "Join nearly half a million
students in the UK who have turned
"to sugar daddies to avoid student
debt and secure a better future."
To get their free premium
membership, all you need
is a university e-mail address.
It says, on average,
she would actually receive a monthly
allowance of 2,900
among other benefits.
And the benefits include
networking opportunities,
career or business advantages.
This is opening
you to a world of men.
They know that students
are struggling.
With over half a million students
sugar dating in the UK,
I want to find out what kind
of support the universities
are offering.
Kent University
agreed to talk to me.
Sugar dating website
Seeking Arrangement claims
it has over 1,000 students
signed up at this university,
the highest in the UK.
We're going to talk about class
as we understand it,
and then we're going to talk
about class as it is represented.
Caitlin is a lecturer
in media and culture.
Through the Me Too movement,
which has been a very powerful
movement, we have talked
about women who don't want sex,
but we really don't want to talk
about this grey area where women
are potentially exchanging sexual
interactions for money.
And the problem with not talking
about it is then we can't
support young people.
If we are not supporting them,
we are not enabling good choices.
We are letting them down.
Sugar dating websites tend to claim
that it's all above board,
but not a lot of information
is provided on these sites.
We don't hold them
accountable in any way.
This is why we see specific
targeting of young people.
Women are more accessible than ever
before, and people who want to abuse
that access can do
that quite freely.
Caitlin has an open-door policy,
and is beginning to see students
who want advice on sugar dating.
What were the main reasons
that you went on these sites?
I was curious, because at the time
I had no money, and I was
like, "Oh, I need quick money
for my rent."
My friend spoke to me
about what she does.
She started off sending pictures
of her feet and then of her body.
At first, she would use someone
else's pictures, like get online.
So her account was fake on this
site, but then it got to the point
where she would meet
up with the person.
She would get
300 in, like, a day.
Some people want company,
so you'd meet the person,
just have dinner with them,
talk to them for a few hours.
Other people would want maybe
sex or a relationship.
It's just easy money.
I could get 500 and my rent done,
and I could do it three
times a week.
Obviously as a student,
it's very difficult with money.
I don't have a full-time job,
I work part time, and I'd get
less than that in a whole month.
And obviously, with rent to pay,
living costs, it is really
difficult, and seeing friends
do it,
it's quite tempting.
So, what would you say
is one of the main reasons
that this has become
so popular with students?
Like being a part of Instagram,
Twitter, so many social media...
..public figures,
like seeing their lifestyle,
it's like, "Oh, I want that,
I want instant money as well."
Do you think sugar daddy sites
are becoming as similar as Tinder
and PlentyofFish,
like normal dating sites?
100%, definitely, definitely.
But I just think the repercussions
aren't really spoken about,
even in uni or between friends,
it's difficult to talk
about without being judged.
Yasmin has now decided not to
start sugar dating.
Bye.
The websites I spoke to were clear
that sugar dating is about mutually
beneficial relationships,
and not about sex for cash.
But by specifically targeting
cash-strapped students,
I wondered how many ended
up on the sites out of financial
desperation, vulnerable
to the offers from much older
wealthy men or women.
Hiya. Nice to meet you.
Is it Tiffany or Tiff?
Tiffany is fine. Tiffany, OK.
Yeah. It's nice here.
Is it close to your uni?
It's not too far.
It's not too far at all.
Within months of starting
university in Nottingham,
22-year-old Luke found himself
running out of cash.
I was in my first year,
coming up to Christmas,
and realising I only just had enough
money to pay for rent,
and very little left over for food
and things like that,
and one of my friends at university,
I kind of noticed that she was
wearing new clothes
and things like that.
She was like, "Oh, well, I've been
kind of seeing a guy,
"you know, he's got a bit of money."
I kind of asked, sort of
sarcastically, whether you know,
"Oh, you've got a sugar daddy,
then?" And she was like,
"Well, yeah, I do."
I started thinking about whether I
could do sort of something similar,
so I set up profiles on sites,
and I started to get quite
a few messages from different men,
went on a date with them.
And what was that like, when you went
on your first date?
To be honest,
I was absolutely terrified.
He's quite a bit older than me,
we'd go for dinner,
go for drinks.
After a few dates,
Luke agree to have sex.
How did you feel
after the first time?
I felt sick, really, but I needed
the money,
so I kind of just kept going.
The focus was always the money?
Yes, yes.
Luke now has a regular sugar
daddy in his mid-50s.
They meet once a week.
The arrangement I have at
the moment, my sugar daddy will pay
for dinner, but if I have sex
with him, he pays me 60,
70 an hour.
Being almost romantically involved
with someone that is older than me,
it's kind of...
..how uncomfortable
that sometimes does make me feel,
and kind of the shame
of that, almost.
You don't enjoy any
aspect of it, do you?
Not particularly, no.
It's pretending to be
a normal relationship.
Maybe how I act around them
isn't how I actually
feel about them.
At the end of the day, it's just an
act that I put on to make
them think it's something real.
Do you think you're coping?
I kind of just block it out, really,
and just say, you know,
this doesn't define me.
Sometimes afterwards,
you kind of do want to just go
and get back in bed and sort of
curl up by yourself just to
make yourself feel better, really.
God.
Luke's family have no idea
that he's in this situation,
and he doesn't feel
he can talk to them.
I know they struggle
financially as well,
and I don't want to put that
pressure on them, or sort of let
them know that I am struggling,
and sort of make them feel guilty.
Luke feels that he can't talk
to anyone about his sugar dating.
Being paid for sex isn't
illegal in the UK,
but Luke is afraid he will be
judged and face the same stigma
as sex workers.
I want to find out for myself
what it's like to be a sugar baby.
"A site you can trust,
introducing wealthy men to beautiful
"women since 2002."
I'm going undercover
by creating a profile posing
as an 18-year-old student.
Adriana.
It sounds like an 18-year-old.
If I was 18 again,
that's what I would be.
I am officially going
to become a sugar baby.
There I am.
Adriana.
That's literally it.
Just name, date of birth.
Now they've sent me
an activation e-mail.
That was so easy.
There's no verification,
it's just...
You could basically be
anybody you want to be.
I'm sociable and fun-loving.
I have a passion for life.
I like that, "I have a passion for
life."
I'm looking to meet new people.
Marital status, married but looking.
That's like a normal thing now
for these websites.
"Choose at least one tag that will
define what you are seeking
"for in a relationship."
Luxury lifestyle,
emotional connection, attentive...
You're basically telling
girls straight away you can't get
through life, or you can't manage
anything, without a rich man.
It's basically putting
a price on women.
I can buy you,
I can buy your time,
I can buy...
..a shag.
Preferred ages, so 40 to 60.
Looking for men who are just
around my dad's age.
You are talking 50-,
60-year-old men specifically
looking for 18-year-olds.
The websites clearly state
the minimum age is 18.
Escorting, prostitution
and human trafficking
are all prohibited.
But age verification and background
checks are not compulsory
for standard members.
In 2014, the world of sugar dating
hit the headlines when sex worker
Alix Tichelman was found guilty
of the involuntary manslaughter
of Google executive Forest Hayes.
They met on a sugar dating website.
Police are referring
to Alix Tichelman as a prostitute,
so how was she allowed on your site?
Well, the fact is we actually
did a background image search,
which we do to all members to make
sure they are not on any escorting
or prostitutional websites.
Her profile didn't raise any red
flags, nor was there anything
within the contents of her profile
to indicate that she was using
the site for these purposes.
And in 2016, former Dragons' Den
star Doug Richard was found
not guilty of sexual activity with
a 13-year-old girl he met
on a sugar dating site.
On her profile,
she lied about her age,
stating she was 17.
This was not picked
up by the website.
New York, the City of Dreams.
In most US states,
sex work is illegal.
Thank you.
The USA has over 17 million people
on sugar dating websites.
One of them was
26-year-old Chandler.
She moved to the Big Apple to make
it in the fashion industry
and clear her student debt.
Hi!
Hello.
I did, like, everything that you do
when you move to New York
and you have no money.
You don't eat a lot, you get
1 pizza, you do what you can.
If you want to have a good life
in New York, you have to figure out
a side hustle.
So I discovered sugar dating,
and it was easy.
You just got on a site and guys
immediately start talking to you,
and they start offering you money.
At first, I thought
you could just go on a date,
there was one guy, he'd give me
200, but if you wanted to make
more money, you then had to sleep
with them.
Chandler was paid 800 for sex.
She knew it was
sex work and illegal.
When you get the cash,
it's this exhilarating feeling.
You have all this money in
your hand, and you just had sex
for 20 minutes.
And like, I make that amount of
money in two weeks in New York,
so it's like, for 20 minutes,
why am I not going to do this again?
But with so much money on offer,
it was a risk she took.
When I got really desperate
for rent was when I tried
it again in March.
Was it the same amount
you got offered? No, it was more.
This time, she says she was offered
1,200 by Ron, who said
he was an investment banker.
And he wanted a threesome,
so Chandler asked a close friend.
So, we're like in the cab getting
ready, and doing some of our make-up
in the car as we were headed
towards him, cos we were a little
crunched for time.
He wanted, like, nude lips,
smoky eye, nice lashes,
he had me get my hair done,
and a very, like, simple lingerie,
like just a thong and a bra.
Like just a nice dress.
And like a high pair of heels.
What should perhaps have rung alarm
bells for Chandler was that Ron
asked her to find
and book a hotel room.
He'd made sure that it was
confirmed, it was booked,
it was paid for, cos he asked me
to send a screenshot of it.
Ron assured Chandler
he'd pay her back.
Did you think it was strange
that you had to organise everything?
I didn't, because he explained
it as the last time
he had a sugar baby,
the arrangement,
she was more of his assistant,
so she would always
take care of things for him,
cos he was so busy.
Ron was very specific -
the hotel had to be close
to the Jay St-MetroTech subway.
Which way do we go now?
A short walk from
a local university.
So we go the hotel,
and he is sitting in the lobby,
he doesn't look like his picture,
we go up to the room,
and he is like, "OK, get out
your phone and I will pay you."
Because he wanted to pay us
through PayPal.
So I signed into PayPal,
and he was like,
"OK, you are going to request..."
Like whatever, like 2,500 or 2,600,
and...
So he goes to request it and he's
like,
"OK, so everything is all set."
And like we put our phone away.
And then he's like, "OK, like,
take off your clothes."
And then the act happens,
and he is like... He's really into
power dynamics, so he wanted
you to be super submissive,
and super thankful of him giving
you all this money,
and he kind of just took turns
with us, and had us all to himself,
and did what he wanted.
Yeah.
We like felt good after, because we
were like, "OK, it's over,
"we just made 1,200,
this is great."
And then on the subway ride home,
I'm looking at my account,
and I'm like, "I don't see the
money. When are you going to accept
"the request?" cos he didn't
actually accept it, and silence.
And then he disappeared.
What was that like, when you realised
he's not going to give
me this money? My heart dropped.
It just...it just sunk in my chest
and I was like, "Oh, my God.
"Now I'm actually in debt,
now I can't pay my rent."
Believing she'd broken the law,
Chandler felt she couldn't
report Ron.
Did you ever think about going
to the police when it happened?
I'm getting paid to have sex,
which is illegal in America,
so they don't have any sympathy
for you unless you are raped
or taken advantage of sexually.
He manipulated me, it's like
emotional rape, in a way.
Like, he's just this master
manipulator that takes advantage
of young women who, like, are in
desperate situations.
If it's so difficult,
and you have to keep reliving it,
why are you so driven
to tell your story?
I can warn women
there is a really dangerous side
to sugar dating,
it's emotionally damaging,
and it's risk behaviour.
Every time you go up
to that hotel room,
you don't know what can happen.
What impact has this
had on your life?
Well, I mean, it lives with me
for ever.
So whoever I date next,
at some point, I have to tell them,
"Hey, like, I had sex for money."
You kind of wonder if you are going
to find someone who will accept
that part of you.
Honestly, someone who
really cares about you,
they will never judge you,
and there is people out there,
I just want you to know,
I personally just want you to know
that, cos there is people, honestly.
What you've been through... There is
good people that will, you know,
no matter what you've been through
or what's happened,
that will not judge you.
Yeah, and I have to remind myself,
like, I don't want to date anyone
that would judge me for that. Yeah.
Chandler reported Ron
to the sugar dating website,
but they banned her for violating
the terms and conditions
by accepting money for sex.
To warn other women,
Chandler went to the press.
Katie Rosman, a features reporter
at the New York Times,
ran the story.
I felt like there were issues
of consent involved.
What it means to say yes,
I really felt like this fell
into a grey area that wasn't
being talked about, because women
are afraid to come forward.
You spoke to the sugar
daddy, what did he say?
He remembered meeting these two
women in a hotel room in Brooklyn,
but that he didn't remember
ever promising to give them money.
I said, "Well, why are you on a
website about sugar dating
"if there's not going to be some
financial component?"
And he really didn't have an answer.
I said, "Well, why did you say
you were an investment banker,
"when you're not
an investment banker?"
And he said, "Because I thought
it would be a good way to meet
"a girl and get somebody to have
sex with me."
By not paying, what we had was
a married father who cheated
on his wife and hadn't
broken the law.
After the article published,
I heard from a number of women
who told me that they had had
the exact same thing happen to them
with the exact same man.
He had refined this technique
over the years, so Chandler wasn't
just some dummy who got hoodwinked,
she was someone who fell victim
to a predator.
Katie then ran a follow-up article
revealing the true identity
of the sexual predator
as Imran Khan, a 36-year-old
graduate student
at New York University's
Center for Urban Science
and Progress in Brooklyn...
..just a minute's walk away
from Jay St-MetroTech subway.
His university is literally
walking distance away.
He was meeting these
girls in the daytime.
Was he just popping out
on his lunch break,
having sex with these girls,
knowing that he wasn't going to pay
them, and then just
walking back into class?
After the New York Times
article was published,
more than a dozen women with similar
stories reached out to Chandler.
Imran Khan had used sugar dating
website Seeking Arrangement
to meet most of them.
In the article, a spokesperson
from the website said that Imran's
IP address was blocked, and he was
banned from using their website.
But two months later,
he struck again, tricking at least
three women in three days...
..this time using the name Ty.
The women were too afraid to speak
openly, but one of them did give me
Imran's number.
Back at my hotel room,
I give him a call to see
if he'll agree to an interview.
No answer.
PHONE CHIMES
Oh, my God.
Fuck.
He's messaged.
He just wants to know who it is.
He wants to know who I am,
but he's still existing,
he's still around.
He's text again.
He's just put,
"I don't know any Tiffany."
I feel sick, cos I think
he just thinks I'm another girl
that he is going to do this with.
That's what he's thinking.
He genuinely just thinks I'm a girl
he's probably met online.
PHONE RINGS
Later that night, Imran called me.
Hello, is that Imran?
Your name came up in
a New York Times article,
and I just wanted to speak
to you about sugar dating.
Oh, you are not familiar
with the New York Times article?
Yeah, so sugar dating.
Well, it would be better
if we could meet up in person,
and then we could talk about it.
He hung up.
He's like so friendly
and high-pitched.
Like, "Hi! This is Ty.
Hi!" Like, so normal and nice.
Not even like,
"Why have you got my number?
"Why are you ringing me?"
I would expect that, like,
anger, just,
"Think you've got the wrong number.
"Oh, no, I don't know
anything about that."
Just so calm, it's scary.
That's exactly what Chandler
said, and I get it now.
We eventually tracked
down Imran Khan.
He says he didn't speak to me
on the phone, and is not aware
of anyone called Ty.
He said sex with Chandler was
consensual, and denied offering
to pay her any money.
We asked him about the other women
with similar complaints,
and he said he was unaware of this.
He also said he had not been active
on any sugar dating sites
for some time.
The man who claims
to have 20 million subscribers
and is behind the world's biggest
sugar dating website has agreed
to speak to me.
It was his website that Imran used
to contact Chandler and the other
girls I spoke to.
I'm about to meet Brandon Wade,
who is the CEO
of Seeking Arrangement.
In interviews, Brandon says
that the reason that he set
up Seeking Arrangement
is because when he was younger,
he struggled to find a girlfriend,
and he said to his mum, "I can't get
"a girl." And she said, "Well,
just focus on your studies, and make
"sure you're rich and successful,
and then the girls will come."
Brandon listened to his mum,
and is reputed to have made a cool
35 million from a string
of controversial sugar dating sites,
like MissTravel,
WhatsYourPrice,
OpenMinded, and of course,
Seeking Arrangement.
He also claims to be the site's
number one sugar daddy, and lives
in a wealthy suburb
on the outskirts of Las Vegas.
Before I speak to him
about Chandler and Imran,
I want to see how a rich
sugar daddy lives.
Hi, I'm Tiffany.
Nice to meet you. Thank you for the
long trip here.
I know, thank you for
letting me into your home.
It's massive.
When I throw parties
or get-togethers,
this is where people
usually hang out.
Oh, so you have a lot
of parties here?
Yeah, I do. I've hosted events
where a bunch of girls,
sugar babies, sort of
come here and hang out. Oh!
So do you all get in the pool?
I do, not at this time of the year,
it's really cold.
But this entire sort
of door sort of slides open.
Let me continue the tour, shall we?
OK, yeah. Yeah.
You have to tell me
about this picture.
This is a picture that was given
to me by my best friend.
Right. He understands the way
to encapsulate what the sugar
lifestyle really stands for.
I think a lot of sugar babies desire
name brand products,
specifically luxurious
brands such as Chanel.
Very nice.
Where is all the stuff?
It's so empty.
Yes.
Is that the look you are going for?
Like a show home?
I like as little clutter
as I can sort of manage.
Right. The minimalist concept
is so attractive to me.
The more things you acquire,
the more you get stressed
out by them. Not if it's a Chanel
bag, though.
Not really, yeah. Those are allowed.
If that makes you feel good,
then that's a separate issue.
And this is our bathroom.
Lovely. You love these open
bathtubs, don't you?
Yeah, yeah.
They're big soaking tubs
that can fit at least two people.
We've actually had four
people in there before.
Four people got in this tub?
Yeah. Like, adults?
I think so. Adults.
What?
Brandon!
For the past year,
48-year-old Brandon has been living
with his 22-year-old
girlfriend Zoey.
Are you going somewhere tonight?
Yeah, the Gwen Stefani concert.
It's kind of like a company
event type of thing.
So you met Brandon through a friend
who was using the website?
A lot of my friends
actually have profiles
and like to use the site.
One girl, I think, two years
ago went to the Oscars,
one of my good friends,
because of a guy she met
on the website, so after that,
all of us were like, "Oh, my God!"
You know, we all, like,
made profiles like that night.
You know, I was really excited
about it.
I guess I found her before she could
progress any further
along that path.
Lucky me.
So, Zoey, would you see
yourself as a sugar baby?
I don't see myself as a sugar baby.
For somehow if he was
to lose all of his money,
I'm so deep in this relationship
and so in love with him now,
that I wouldn't just like leave
and I feel like that
is kind of what, you know,
a sugar baby may do.
Do you get a monthly allowance?
I don't get a monthly allowance,
but do you want to kind
of elaborate on this?
Well, she gets a lot,
so I don't want to make it sound
like she gets nothing.
She has a credit card that she uses
for, obviously, everything
that she wants.
She also has most of
the things paid for,
in terms of every time we travel
or we go out to eat,
I pay for everything. And of course
all the gifts that she gets.
But in addition to that,
what I've done, is I've actually
instead of giving her an allowance,
I've actually put money
in her savings account every time
we hit a specific milestone
in our relationship,
because I want her to feel secure
that if this relationship
doesn't work out,
that she has the resources to be
able to leave if she wants.
And that's one of the key points
that a lot of sugar babies have sort
of commented to me on the website
is that because they're dating a lot
of these older guys,
they feel dependent on them
to the point where they can never
leave because they are constantly
dependent on their support.
And I don't want, I don't ever want
that to happen between us.
Do you still have sugar babies now?
Zoey is my main partner
and my girlfriend.
I do see girls here and there
once in a while if I ever get bored.
So, if you were to define
your relationship then, your set-up,
it would be, what?
I would say that I am polyamorous,
and I have to be honest
with the people that I meet
of my nature, and they can judge
for themselves as to whether
they like me for who I am.
Zoey is your only girlfriend,
but you see other girls?
Yeah, and I would term those other
girls as sugar babies, right.
And when you see the other girls,
what is that like?
Most of the time,
it's simply dinner. OK.
And, you know... So you're not
intimate?
I'm usually not intimate,
because my tastes are extremely
high, just look at Zoey.
People have to measure up,
and it's not always easy
to measure up.
While you've been together,
you have been intimate
with other sugar babies?
Yes, I have.
OK, and Zoey, you're OK with that?
Yeah, I am. I'm just a very
non-jealous person.
And do you do the same?
Meet other guys, intimately?
No, because I'm naturally
monogamous, I have no, like, desire
to meet, you know, to...
Any romance with any other guy.
So what would happen if Zoey
wanted to do the same?
Would you be comfortable with that?
Um, that would depend.
We're thinking of having
kids later this year. Oh, OK.
So I would probably
not be OK with that.
OK. Yeah.
Well, he wouldn't be OK with that,
but it's not like it
would be a deal-breaker.
I think once we get to that bridge,
we shall cross it then.
I just want it to be kind of clear
that if it was a thing,
like, you know, we're in kind
of a deep enough relationship,
that I feel like it wouldn't
dismiss everything that we have.
Brandon has been
married three times.
He has said in previous interviews
that 40% of the sugar daddies
using his website are married.
Well, thank you so much for coming.
Thank you for letting
me in your home.
I will see you tomorrow, see you
tomorrow at the office.
Yes, take care. As long as they're
open with their wives, he calls
it ethical cheating.
He's obviously really wealthy,
and to hear that his home is
4.5 million, he's so rich.
But while we were walking around his
house, and he was showing me
all the nice things
he has and the way he lives his
life, all I could think
about were the sugar babies
I've spoken to, like Chandler,
who have been scammed and exploited.
It's time to check in with my fake
sugar baby profile.
As 18-year-old Adriana,
I've received over 80 messages.
"Looking for a hot young sugar
baby."
"Each meeting 500
to 800 gift for you..."
"Hi, I've recently finished my
previous long-term arrangement
"and supporting her through Uni..."
"Hi, London Girl, you sound
to be just what I'm looking for,
"young, exotic, slim, and petite."
55! I'm 18 on this website.
Before I can start
messaging sugar daddies,
I have to agree with the website's
rules which state I'm not allowed
to receive money for one-off dates,
known as pay-per-meets.
So I'm going to write back
and say hi, tell me more.
Message back.
There are literally
people living on here.
"I'm 49, so you'd have to be
attracted to an older man,
"and be very open
minded and a pleaser."
Oh, my gosh.
The sugar daddy suggests
we chat off the website.
I'm going to give my number and see
what they have to say.
Within minutes,
he contacts me on WhatsApp.
PHONE CHIMES
"I'm looking for a girl I can get
to know and become friends with.
"That's important for me.
"I'd like to meet them three to four
times a month, and we can spend time
"together with a few
hours of intimacy. Kiss."
Interesting.
Define intimacy.
He's typing.
He's so quick.
Oh, my God.
No, he just spelt it out.
He's just said, "Fucking
in all its varied forms."
Can't be more
specific than that, can you?
Not even sex,
like literally fucking.
That is...
I'm going to text back and say,
"What's the arrangement?"
It's not long before he's asking me
to break the rules.
"To begin with, as we get
to know each other,
"are you OK with
a pay-per-meet arrangement?
"I would suggest 150."
Which is what he's done
in previous arrangements.
Look how easy it is.
There is a website that just opens
them up to so many young girls.
He wouldn't be able to rock up at
a university and stand
there cos it would look creepy if
a 50-, 60-year-old man was hanging
outside the gates of a university
campus, but because it's online,
you can just browse and just choose.
It just feels wrong.
None of the websites I looked
at allowed pay-per-meets,
and this policy keeps
them within the law.
Hi. Hi, welcome.
Brandon's office is this way.
This morning, I have the opportunity
to ask Brandon
some difficult questions.
Hi, Brandon. How are you?
Nice to see you again.
Nice to see you again.
You put out, a couple days ago,
a press release which said
that nearly half a million UK
students have signed up as sugar
babies, and the average
they receive is around 3,000.
Do you know how many sugar babies
receive that amount?
Um, we don't exactly know.
I think the way we tabulate
that is through a survey,
as well as through what people put
down on their profiles in terms
of what they are looking for, and,
of course, you know,
that's how we come
up with a number.
Can you accept that potentially
there are students who would be
financially desperate,
and then turn to your website?
Nowhere on the website are we
telling people, "Hey, if you're
"desperate, please come and sign up,
this is the place for you."
In fact, we present an image
that is one of luxury.
You know, the fact is the site
certainly works. If not, why are
these college students signing up in
droves year on year,
and the number's only increasing.
And do you think sugar babies are
having pay-per-meet arrangements?
That's just another short-term,
short form for, perhaps, escorting.
Because what you're doing
is you are paying somebody to spend
time with them.
That is, in our mind, escorting,
and that's not permitted
on our website.
All of the sugar babies that I've
spoken to say they do pay-per-meets.
Do you accept that you are
facilitating sex for money
on your website?
No, absolutely not!
And that's the problem, right,
because any dating website,
you're going to find
that aspect to it.
I have pictures upon pictures
on my phone of Tinder screenshots
and Bumble screenshots
where the women were or are clearly
soliciting sex for money,
but is that the intent
of Tinder or Bumble? No.
I wanted to talk to you about one
specific case that was
in the New York Times.
Katie Rosman spoke to Chandler,
she was using your site,
and she met up with
a sugar daddy in New York,
and he asked her to bring a friend,
and said that he would pay them
for sex, and then they had sex,
and he didn't pay them.
Well, what can I say about
a situation like that?
Well, don't meet a guy
and be paying for sex.
I mean, just don't do it.
So it's her own fault.
I mean, that's all I can say, right?
Never do that.
I mean, you agreed to the terms
of use on the website - to never
accept money for sex,
then why are you doing
that in the first place?
He's offering her 1,000,
2,000 to her and her friends.
That's really appealing.
Well, that is appealing,
but Chandler should know
that there are tonnes of escort
agencies and madams
in New York City willing
to set her up on 5,000 dates
where she can have sex
and be guaranteed payment.
Go do that.
Why is she even on our website?
I mean, to call herself a sugar baby
is simply destroying my community.
I don't want people
like that on my website.
If you want to be a prostitute,
go freaking be a prostitute.
You will get paid that way.
Just don't pretend and be a
sugar baby, because a sugar baby
is not a prostitute.
But you are saying that the girls
are breaking the rules...
Exactly! Isn't the responsibility
with the guys as well?
Both people are breaking the rules,
and again, you're asking me
about, "Oh, these girls are so
desperate and they're so dumb,
"they need to be taught."
They're in college!
They passed the college
entrance exam.
That's quite a bit of education,
don't you think, to know
what is right and wrong?
Chandler reported Imran,
and in October last year,
you said that he was blocked,
and then he actually went
on the website a couple of months
later and did the same thing
to another girl.
You know, the guys are smart too,
and people are smart, right?
Because if you are banned
from a website, what can you do?
Go get a new phone,
cancel your credit card,
get a new credit card,
there are ways around the system.
My concern is, are you doing enough
to protect sugar babies
and sugar daddies?
Yeah, I think after this interview,
I'm going to call my lawyer and file
a lawsuit against him.
So, we'll start with that and then
we'll fix our process,
and then we'll compile a list
of these complete users
who have been banned off the website
that keep coming back,
and we will begin to take more legal
action against them.
So that is what we will start doing.
I get your point.
Very nice. Very nice.
Seeking Arrangement is attempting
to sue Imran Khan for continuously
violating the site's
terms and conditions,
but they are yet to track him down.
Thank you so much
again for meeting me.
Well, thank you again. Have a safe
flight. Take care. Bye-bye.
Further investigation revealed Khan
had already been kicked
off the site 14 times.
It's believed he's not been active
on the website since January 2019.
Back in London, and my sugar baby
inboxes have over 250 messages.
I've had a message
from a guy called Jim.
He said he wants to meet at least
twice a month in a London hotel
for some intimate fun,
and he'll pay me 250.
He contacted me via Sugardaddy.com,
another site that does not allow
pay-per-meets.
Like many of the men
on sugar dating websites,
48-year-old Jim has very few
details on his profile.
He's asked to meet me
tomorrow in a London hotel,
and I have no idea
what he looks like.
I asked for a picture,
but he wouldn't send me one.
PHONE RINGING
But he is happy
to speak on the phone.
Hello?
Hi, how are you?
I'm good, thanks.
Thanks for calling.
Yes.
Um, do you think we could meet
possibly, like, downstairs first
and just have a chat?
Take care. Bye.
He's like, "can we go
straight to the room?"
I have to say no,
I want to talk to you first.
I don't even know
what he looks like.
Imagine meeting someone in a room
and don't even know what they look
like, and then potentially
be intimate with that person.
I'm really shocked at how direct
these guys are with asking me
for sex for money.
On the websites, it says this is an
arrangement, and you get
to have chemistry with someone,
you'll connect with them,
they will provide you mentorship,
but essentially what is happening
is I feel like I've entered
the world of sex work,
and it's through
sugar dating websites.
I'm a bit nervous,
now, about tomorrow.
It's really well concealed.
Nobody ever thinks
you have a hidden camera on. Yeah.
So you are turned on now.
Jim has booked a room
in a central London hotel.
He has no idea I will
be secretly filming.
Thank you.
I'm sorry about yesterday,
cos I was like, "Oh, I just wanted
"to see, like, a picture."
So I was, like, asking for, like,
pictures, but you can't send them.
Is that cos of your job
and stuff or like married?
You're not married, are you?
Oh, OK.
Outside?
Yeah, yeah, OK cool.
Should we sit here?
Oh, thank you.
Being with someone younger or
anything like that, is it better?
Yeah.
So, am I like the first
for you or not?
Oh, OK.
Maybe in a minute, I just need...
I'm still a bit nervous.
I'm just nervous about what will
happen and stuff like that,
like in the room and stuff, that's
why I'm just wanting to know.
OK.
OK.
OK.
So then, it's, like, sex?
OK.
And then...
Then you, like,
I get paid as well?
I'm just trying to get my head
around it, really, cos it's kind
of normal on that website,
cos a lot of them
are, like, messaging for,
like, to meet and stuff.
Is it really?
I'm just going to take a minute.
I'm just going to go to the loo.
Is that OK?
You're going to wait out here, yeah?
OK, cool. I'll just be a sec.
I'm surprised at how vulnerable
and intimidated this situation
is making me feel.
I'm struggling to get
out of the situation.
So I didn't realise how difficult
it is, because he's so nice
and friendly, and he's not creepy,
so it makes it harder to try
and leave cos I feel bad,
because I feel like he spent money
on the hotel and he's so friendly
and nice,
and he's like, "Should we go now?"
And I'm struggling to say,
"No, I'm so sorry, I can't do it."
And he's been up front with me
that he wants sex,
so now I have to go back and say,
"I'm so sorry, I can't do this",
and I'm scared.
So, uh, I'm just going to be like...
I'm just like, I should have said
it then, but I didn't.
Hey.
Oh, my God. I feel so bad, but I
don't think I can do it.
But I'll pay for
the room or whatever.
OK. Thank you so much.
I will let you know. Yeah. OK.
Thank you. Take care.
Bye.
Jim didn't give much away,
but he was clear about why he uses
sugar dating websites.
He just told me that the majority
of people on sugar daddy websites
are there for sex.
That means that this platform
has become a place for older men
to pay young girls for sex.
When I started making
this documentary, I wanted
to understand how different
sugar dating is to escorting
and prostitution.
I personally think sugar
dating is sex work.
I don't think there's
any other way of saying it.
My experience of being
on these websites,
the majority of men on there
want sex of some form.
Whether they sugar-coat
it in an arrangement,
but the majority aren't even
sugar-coating it.
The majority are just saying,
"I want to have sex with you for
money."
I have to say what it is.
I would never judge
anyone for sugar dating,
but from what I've seen,
few sugar babies live a luxury
lifestyle, and there is
a darker side with risks
that should be taken seriously.