Shadaa (2019) Movie Script

1
"You look hot while clicking selfies.."
"Your figure is taut."
"You should do a song with Diljit.."
"You look like a model."
"I think God has mixed the
beauty of Aish and Kareena in you."
"Tommy jeans are made just
for your slender waist"
"Tommy jeans are made just
for your slender waist"
"Just for your slender waist."
"You wear camouflage jackets.."
"You have a pitbull for protection."
"I heard you're fond of off-roading"
"I have bought a Khaki
colour jeep just for you"
"You wear camouflage jackets.."
"You have a pitbull for protection."
"I heard you're fond of off-roading"
"I have bought a Khaki
colour jeep just for you"
"All night long my heart
palpitates for you"
"Tommy jeans are made just
for your slender waist"
"Tommy jeans are made just
for your slender waist"
"Just for your slender waist."
"Insta is overloaded due to
the hot pictures you post"
"Likes start pouring in when you
upload slow-mo clips"
"Insta is overloaded due to the
hot pictures you post"
"Likes start pouring in when you
upload slow-mo clips"
"Oh the look when you leave your hair open,
wear a Punjabi suit with a pashmina shawl"
"Tommy jeans are made just for
your slender waist"
"Tommy jeans are made just for
your slender waist"
"Tommy jeans are made just
for your slender waist"
"Just for your slender waist."
Baby, I know my family
wouldn't approve.
Want to elope?
You think we can?
Sonam, where are you off to?
Sauri (In-laws).
Sorry is fine, but..
Not sorry, ma'am, I meant to her in-laws.
And don't you call my
in-laws before dawn.
Okay?
Be a good teacher.
Sonam!
Who is it?
It's me, mom.
I've brought
your daughter-in-law with me.
Are the men with sticks
following you two?
No, her family is still unaware.
I whisked her off from the hostel.
Excellent.
You did a good job.
God bless you. Stay blessed.
Wait right there, I'll be right back.
Listen..
Wake up!
Chadta has brought home a girl.
Congratulations.
Oh, you have such beautiful knees!
She's beautiful.
Ward off the evil, bridegroom's mother.
The bride and bridegroom
are at your doorstep.
Here's your tea.
Here's your tea.
It's over here.
What's he up to?
Is he having a fit?
The unwilling bachelor
is dreaming about his wedding.
Give him a whack!
What the hell, mom!
He asked me to do it.
- Where are my things?
- I burnt them.
She's about to become a
mother for the second time.
Stop dreaming about her already,
unwilling bachelor!
Why that title father?
Should I address you as doctor instead?
It's not just him,
the whole village addresses you as such.
- Here, take it.
- What's wrong with me?
He should have owned another 10 acres.
Didn't I manage to get such
a beautiful bride with 11 acres?
It's because you two
behave like newlyweds..
..that people think I am still a kid.
Right, your nappies are
still out drying somewhere.
I had 45 chickens that I loved.
I'm only left with 8.
I fed 37 of them to the
families that came to see you.
My next option is feeding them my flesh.
Listen, there is a
prospective match for you.
Have a look.
Hold the glass, mom.
Have a look.
You are just wasting time talking rubbish
rather than showing what's important.
One bird in hand is
better than two in the bush.
She isn't beautiful.
Like you'd marry Zeenat
Aman (yesteryears actress).
Didn't you manage
to nab a beautiful wife?
I too shall find one some day.
Son, he managed to nab
one because he too was handsome.
Of course,
people taunt like it's their right.
My parents too can't help but taunt me.
- I don't want your tea.
- Why?
They will be here by 12.
Dress well.
Take it.
- Hello.
- Hello.
He's the boy.
They own 11 acres of land.
He's a photographer.
He draws a salary of 18,000.
Well, he manages to make around
21,000 if he's doing a grand wedding.
They tip well if they are happy.
And these days there is a trend
to click pre-wedding pictures..
He's very creative in that as well.
Tell them.
For a wedding, I'd made the
bride look like an orchestra singer..
..and the groom like a drunkard.
And for the wedding before that..
..I'd made the bride look like
a sparrow and the groom like a crow.
I highlighted their love story.
Come, let's go and pee.
That's enough, let's go.
What do you think?
The chicken was delicious.
The boy's handsome.
And the family is also okay.
Such boys get grabbed by the relatives
before they even hit the market, I say.
I am sure something is fishy.
I think so too.
It has to be something bad.
Bye, son.
They come here to have a picnic.
They feast on chicken and
alcohol and then drive away.
You never know, they might
consult with others and get back to us.
Dad, You shouldn't be so negative.
He is negative about everything.
They would have given you
500 if they were interested.
And you.. just carried
a plate out and sat down.
Why didn't you touch their feet?
Moreover, you were acting
shy like the girls do. Bloody pigeon!
And what were you telling them?
Do I dance to get tips?
We sacrificed another precious chicken
of ours to feed those thankless beasts.
This one was very good.
It used to go and shit outside.
So Chadta, did you get betrothed?
I thought I should go
and congratulate my brother.
Here son, go and sit with grandpa.
Come here, my boy.
How are you?
How are you doing? All good?
You two look disappointed.
It didn't work out?
You guys are very deceitful.
Uncle, you took 45 chicks.
All of them turned out to be roasters.
You are smart enough.
When those 45 roasters couldn't mate..
..how do you expect to find one.
Greet your uncle, son.
Hello.
Hey aunt, how are you?
Don't try to get too friendly with me.
Villagers will start talking.
"With two birds on a tree,
we know this won't end well."
"Oh unwilling bachelors,
why do you wish to make my life hell?"
No, I cannot be seen talking to you.
At least look at your age, aunt.
An unmarried man cannot be trusted.
The one who is starving
doesn't fuss over stale bread.
Come on, no one's going to find out.
This will stay between us.
- Oh no.
- Aunt!
You imp!
Ashraf Ali!
I wonder what made God
pair such a beautiful couple.
You two make an amazing pair.
Sister, now I want you to do this.
We'll insert a nice
picture of brother here..
..and on this hand,
we'll insert your picture.
Now, a little wider,
Otherwise brother won't fit there.
Right, a little wider.
So.. ready?
Your dress colour is beautiful.
You will stand out in the photos.
Call the groom, brother.
He's the groom, boss.
- He's the groom?
- Yes.
One day I'll have a heart
attack while clicking such photos.
This horse doesn't get any grass
while such donkeys feast non-stop.
Brother!
Brother, who is the matchmaker?
Can I have his number?
My aunt matched us up.
She is her sister's daughter.
- Aunt has sinned by slaughtering a cow.
- What?
Anyway..
We have this based on 1947 partition,
like the movie Gaddar.
- Okay.
- Yes, that's the theme.
Get the lanterns.
Folk dancers.. come on.
Sir, Please pay us, we need to go
for another wedding shoot.
My freaking luck,
everyone in the world is getting married.
Pay them 400 each.
And pay the girls 600 each.
What's your name?
Whose daughter are you?
Don't bother enquiring about her family,
she is my wife.
Here you go.
Boss, there are 12 of them.
- And they come as a couple.
- Let's go.
Don't try to seek a match here.
Jalandhar, I used to get many
proposals in the beginning..
..but I kept refusing them
because of the girl in college.
Then one day I thought,
"She already has a child."
She hasn't even named him
Chadta after me.
That wretch didn't think about me at all.
Now when I've made up my mind,
I'm not getting any proposals.
You know when all the
vegetables get sold out..
- ..and the rejected vegetables
are left on the cart. - Yes.
- 20 rupees for everything
on the cart kind.. - Yes.
Now I am getting those
kinds of proposals.
They too say that they don't want me.
Boss, I think you should
consult with a priest.
Oh, You mind your own business.
I don't believe in priests.
Sometimes your stars just aren't aligned.
And the priests can align them?
Yes, I should consult a priest.
Like hell.
There is trouble.
Priest, I cannot marry a dog.
Nor can I marry a tree.
Nor do I have too many coconuts..
..to tie threads across them
and keep throwing them into the river.
Tell me if you have any other solution.
You cannot get married.
The reason?
In your previous life,
you married 365 times.
You were a king.
You had 365 queens.
You were really fed up with them.
"365 characters of a woman..
keep the men chicaned for life."
These are your famous words.
And you said yourself that..
..you shouldn't be given
a wife for the next seven lifetimes.
- Are you sure?
- Yes.
Look priest,
I came here on Jalandhar's advice.
But I don't believe in such things.
You are an educated man.
There is some truth in what you said.
It is possible that I
was a king in my previous life.
I could have had 365 wives..
And around 150-200 kids too.
But this thing about I cannot
get married is not possible.
If I was a king and I was sad then
I would've imprisoned all 365 of them.
I wouldn't have ruined my
seven lifetimes for them.
Jalandhar told me that
you got rejected 37 times.
38th one rejected him last night.
Hey, do you wish to carry around the
stand for me or incense sticks for him?
You cannot get married, son.
- You are not destined to.
- And what if I do?
Forget it.
You can ring all the bells that you want.
We are coming. We are on the way.
- Forget it. You cannot get married.
- Yes, we are coming.
- I'll within a month.
- Whatever.
Stay blessed.
You too are facing
trouble getting married?
Let's get together and find a solution.
Let's go, boss.
Why do wish to get thrashed?
- A month!
- Let's go.
- Wasn't this an NRI wedding?
- Yes, it was.
They have done a very
rustic decoration for it.
Let's ask him.
- Hello..
- Mela Singh.
Is this the place where
an NRI wedding is taking place?
Yes, it is.
Only 20-30 people have come from abroad.
I've arranged others, on rent.
To make the wedding more lively.
Be it for a shooting, a wedding,
a dance show, a funeral or a fight..
I supply all kinds of people.
We're supposed to meet
a wedding planner here.
She is their leader.
Mela, where were you?
Where are your people?
She doesn't even let
me enjoy a cold drink.
She calls herself a planner.
- Jalandhar..
- Yes?
When I see her,
my heart starts playing it..
What, a guitar?
Guitar? Come on,
where do you think we are, in Paris?
Alghoza! It is!
Let's go.
That's it,
now the ants can't get to them.
- Perfect.
- Okay.
And what about the crows?
Birds with wings?
Crows, doves, pheasants, pigeons.
Your sweets will disappear like
girls disappear from a bachelor's life.
Boss, do you have to
include yourself everywhere?
You sit here with a stick in your hand.
Scare away any bird that comes here.
But wasn't I supposed to be the
groom's paternal uncle?
It's okay,
I'll ask someone else to be his uncle.
You stay here.
Fine.
And Gagan, get their clothes changed.
No one should be seen in
western clothes here.
- It's a theme wedding.
- Okay.
You can do one more thing.
Keep bowls of water
under the legs of the cots.
I know that ants know rock climbing
but they don't know how to swim.
You know that, don't you, uncle?
This is what we do in the village.
I'm not the paternal uncle.
Oh!.. I'm the paternal uncle.
But, She doesn't listen to us.
Mela told us to do as she says.
And so that's what we are doing.
Now if she asks us to lift the casket
at a wedding then we'll do that as well.
- How does it concern us?
- Fine.
No one will say anything.
And you'll say it in my ears.
Excuse me?
- Whisper it into my ears.
- Okay.
- Don't say it loud.
- Okay.
Okay?
Yes, I'm keeping the bowls
under the legs of the cot.
She knows nothing,
and she'll leave me with nothing.
No one offers you even a candy, boss..
..and you dream of having
a dairy milk chocolate?
Camera.
Uncle, carry the Ladoos
(sweets) downstairs.
No way!
Did you get them made
to eat or to carry them around?
Carry them downstairs she says.
"Where did they fly away..."
"Your beloved maternals..."
"Your beloved..."
Now the Fanda Paina
(getting hanged) ritual.
The Galla Paina (orientation) ritual.
Are you sure?
Yes, Ms. Who-wants
-to-be-a-millionaire, lock it.
This is called Galla Paina ritual.
I was just kidding.
This ritual is known as Galla Paina.
- Smile.
- See, all of you know nothing.
Even the villagers do not know.
We've been paid to keep quiet.
She is instead insulting us.
Start.
"Where did they fly away..."
Some people consider
marriage as an ordeal.
That's why I had said so.
But they don't know that
marriage is a beautiful feeling.
It is a union of two souls.
God forms all relationships.
He just leaves this one on us to form.
He gave us a right
to choose our own life partner.
Beautiful.
"They distributed sweets..."
"When the frogs were born..."
How do you know about
all the rituals at the wedding?
He's an unwilling bachelor.
He's desperate to get married.
That's why he has memorised everything.
Laugh, Jalandhar has cracked a joke.
He's very funny.
Well, marriage is a union of two souls.
But a connection only happens
when one soul meets another.
How much can one soul do on its own?
I noticed that you
know a lot about feelings.
Only a married person
usually knows that much.
Are you married?
It's not right to be so frank.
No, I meant I'd be the
wedding photographer otherwise.
First click for those who have hired you.
Right.
They are moving the Chakki
(grinder) in the opposite direction.
Whisper it in my ears.
They are moving the Chakki
in the opposite direction.
Good.
- You've learnt.
- Thank you.
Hey no...
- You are moving the Chakki in
the wrong direction. - Okay.
You should move it like this.
And you too.
Right.
Hey, aunt!
Where to? Where are you off to?
Can't we even go to relieve ourselves?
- Or do you want us to wet our dress?
- Should we?
- Enjoy your cold drink!
- Move aside.
- Fine, come back soon.
- Where did you send them?
Mela, even if one person goes
missing then madam will have my neck.
And yours too.
Get the old hags ready for Gidda (dance).
Don't worry.
-I am keeping a watch on them,
they won't go anywhere. -Gagan Ji
Yes?
Take a look at this photo.
It's beautiful.
You work hard.
You are carrying all
the burden on your shoulders.
It's great.
I am sure you get paid well too.
No! She only pays
me 10,000 for a wedding.
Do you know how much money she makes?
Oh really? Strange!
She is very clever!
Her husband must be a
great soul for living with her.
She is 31-years-old and still single.
Who'd want to marry such a girl?
Aunt, have you made
preparations for Gidda?
God kept her available only for me.
When you get the same beauty,
the same match on your own..
..why would anyone
want a dirty matchmaker?
Finally I have met my match.
She is unmarried and so am I.
Hey God!
"When will you get knickers
matching to the kurti stitched?"
Smile!
Smile!
Louder!
"When will you get knickers
matching to the kurti stitched?"
You too join them.
Come on.
"Sometimes by saying hmm,
sometimes by saying yes..."
Wait.
- Come here.
- Who, me?
- Do Kikli (twirling) with me.
- What?
Do Kikli with me, I need to show them.
- Oh, okay. I'll be right back.
- Hurry up.
Look at this.
"Let me tell you what lies
in the heart of an unmarried man!"
Aunt!
What kind of disgusting song is this?
Can't you take the situation
into consideration?
You have hired such people?
They have ruined the atmosphere.
Brother, I don't have an orchestra band.
They are doing the best they can.
Listen to me ma'am, they are dancing for now
but you'll be charged dancers fee for them.
Right, aunt?
Yes, Mela. My throat has gone dry singing.
Get me a cold drink.
Yes, Mela. My throat has gone dry too.
Get two cold drinks.
Don't worry aunt, he'll get them.
You sing that song..
..."now that's what
you call a beautiful pair."
"Now that's what you
call a beautiful pair."
"Now that's what you
call a beautiful pair."
"Now that's what you
call a beautiful pair."
"Now that's what you
call a beautiful pair."
"Now that's what you
call a beautiful pair."
Jalandhar, my grandpa used to say..
..doors which you try
to push open with force..
..might open just with slight a pull.
I was destined for a love marriage.
And look at the
matchmakers I had hired.
They used to guide me like
how we potty train a child.
Chadta, talk softly,
don't lift your head..
..talk only when you are spoken to.
Pick only one piece of the sweetmeat.
Right. They made quite
a spectacle out of you, boss.
Did you see her eyes?
They are so beautiful.
Moreover, she is unmarried.
The mole on her cheeks,
God has placed it himself there.
Moreover, she is unmarried.
When she talks,
her lips move like that of a fish.
Moreover, she is unmarried.
I swear on God,
your brother is in true love!
The way you keep saying 'moreover,
she is unmarried'.
Sounds like helplessness, not love.
Oh come on, don't ruin the mood.
Let the atmosphere last.
Do you know Cristiano Ronaldo?
I'm a Cristiano Ronaldo.
And, I won't miss a penalty.
You bloody pervert!
Who are you to offer me milk!
Who'd offer you if not me?
What about when you were
massaging my head when I was asleep?
- Mela, I feel used! Call my husband!
- Keep it down.
- Chop his head off!
- I didn't do anything, Mela.
- Calm down.
- I'll tear him apart, you pervert!
- You misunderstood!
- Go to sleep.
Wait you scoundrel!
You couldn't resist?
Showed them our true culture?
It's nothing, it is important
to show them some bad culture too.
Go to sleep.
Don't make me hit you. Bloody leech!
- What happened?
- Brother, He's a crazy bachelor.
You know how they act at a wedding.
One should hunt down all such
bachelors and feed them rat poison.
- We should get rid of all unwilling
bachelors in Punjab. - That's enough.
Stop preaching.
He wants to get rid of all
unwilling bachelors in Punjab.
Tell me, which ones of you
are good at dialogue delivery?
Many of us, brother.
I'll call whoever you want.
But you'll be charged 900 per person.
Let's finalise at 150.
- Final.
- Done.
You are a businessman.
Right, brother.
- I'll go help them rehearse.
- Go for it.
Hello.
- Not there!
Hey, did we get everything for the ritual?
Mela, you should consult Chadta..
- ..and find out if we
have missed anything. - Right.
- I must say, he is a very smart boy.
- Yes, he is.
Look, I heard that he
likes Vanjhali madam.
- He is a decent man.
- Yes, but he is scared to tell her.
He says, look at me and
then look at Vanjhali madam.
I said, no son, you are such a nice boy.
What more would Vanjhali madam want?
What more would she want?
- He loves her a lot, girl. True love.
- True love.
I heard it was love at first sight.
Like they say, when love beckons...
- Nand Kaur, it wasn't like
this back then. - Right.
- She's gone.
- She left.
- Keep quiet.
- Keep quiet. Let's sing.
"Big and tall branches,
in the middle of..."
Are you in love?
Oh!, I've thought of
a new pre-wedding theme.
Tell me...
... was it love at first sight? Like Mirza?
Who told you?
I didn't want to tell anyone.
I would have taken it to my grave.
But these elders are very nave.
They don't know how to keep a secret.
So, what do we do now?
I too am in love.
But I am from Chandigarh
and you are from Dhanoli (Village).
My parents won't accept this match.
Then shall we run away from home?
- Yes.
- Yes?
- Let's do that.
- Yes.
Should I steal some
jewellery from home too?
- Or should I come just like this?
- Do whatever you feel like.
There is no such thing as love.
We are here to work.
Let's concentrate on work.
Bloody Romeo.
Jalandhar, time to shell out 1000 rupees.
For what?
For what?
He said that I'll easily be
able to trap a girl from Chandigarh.
He said they fall in love pretty easily.
I said forget about love.
What is love, huh?
Arrange marriage is the best.
Like I said,
I have thought of a pre-wedding theme.
- Let me tell you.
- No need. I've already thought of one.
They'll hold each other hands
and take a walk in the mustard field.
Then the girl will drive a tractor
and the boy will walk next to it.
Fine.
And last, take them to a tube-well
and make them throw water at each other.
That's it.
Fine, I'll make them throw some water.
Ma'am, the wedding...
Get them out of here.
I want everyone back by 4.
Look at her bossing around.
She wants everything
to happen immediately..
..but she cribs when
it comes to paying up.
Such a clever girl you are!
Be grateful she has given you a job.
I mean you are backbiting
about someone who is feeding you!
You should be grateful to her!
Here she is complaining about her.
- Jalandhar!
- Yes?
Pack everything and follow me.
- This is a limit.
- True that.
He too is very bossy.
And he pays me only 8,000.
It is a limit.
She's not falling for me. At least you
get your act together, brother.
You will now go for a pre-wedding shoot.
This is your moment,
so enjoy it to the fullest.
Have fun.
Have a look at this, please.
This is the pre-wedding theme
I have planned for my own wedding.
How cute.
This is the life I want to give to my wife.
- Beautiful.
- Isn't it?
- Why are you getting so sad?
- Huh?
Me? No.
I know how your desires mourn
when you fulfil other people's desires.
And you must be thinking
who would marry this 31-year-old.
- Who told you?
- I know everything.
You are 31 and I am 29.
I'm ready to marry you.
I don't believe in
the old school of thought..
..that the bride needs
to be younger than the groom.
I can make such a small sacrifice.
We are also into the same profession.
It'll benefit our work as well.
Hey Mr. Generous,
I have rejected 365 men like you.
It's not that I am unable to get married.
The fact is that I
don't wish to get married.
What do you mean by, you
don't wish to get married?
This is how this world works.
This is what has been happening
right from the beginning.
I mean, you will eventually
marry someone, right?
Why? Where is it written that
it is compulsory to get married?
And then,
why does one need to get married?
You don't understand,
there are 100 reasons why.
I mean...
Please!
I can even adopt a child.
A smart white female has rightly said:
A woman needs a man as
much as a fish needs a bicycle.
Come on, why would a fish need a bicycle?
Exactly! Why do I need a man?
A fish?
Now which brother's sister said that?
I don't wish to play.
Huh?
"Come on sister-in-law, get the water..."
Shoot will be beautiful.
Don't worry.
You will hold each other's
and take a walk in the mustard field.
Then she'll be on a tractor
and you will walk next to it.
You are sure you don't
want to get married?
You want to die a spinster?
Don't create a scene!
Shut up and do you work.
They are waiting.
You aren't my wife,
why should I listen to you?
We aren't going to click
pictures in a mustard field.
It is my job, I know what do to.
Jalandhar, get my clothes.
We are photographers.
We aren't here for
a fancy dress competition.
She's nothing but making
fun of these rich people.
She calls this a theme wedding?
- You are here for the culture, right?
- Right.
Come on, we will shoot
proper Jatt culture then.
- Okay.
- Let's go.
Who has dung in their house?
We have excess dung at our place.
Our cattle will give fresh dung.
It will make better dung cakes.
You will make dung cakes.
- Oh.
- Not oh, let's go.
- Let's go. - Let's go, guys.
I'll show you our culture.
Look at how happy they are.
When I can make my clients so happy..
..imagine how happy will I make my wife!
You don't like it?
No, I don't.
Saying 'No' now. Later girls like you
would fast on Mondays and pray to God..
..to send someone into your lives.
I am sure God feels like
giving them a whack and say.
I had sent over such a handsome boy.
You being handsome is
just a delusion of yours.
You shouldn't have stayed unmarried
if you were even okay looking.
Hey! You are a spinster!
I get 100 proposals every day!
That too from those
who are just sweet sixteen.
Try fooling someone else.
Girls who are sweet
sixteen are minors, idiot.
You didn't let me finish.
They keep begging and saying,
get engaged now..
..you can get married after two years.
And you? .. you have gone past
your expiry date, spinster.
You, your father and
your grandfather can be that!
I am not a spinster!
Till 26 you are respectably single.
By 28, the warning bell rings.
By 30, you become an unwilling bachelor.
And after 30?
After 30 you become hopeless.
You aren't a spinster, you are hopeless.
Let's go, Jalandhar.
Goodbye, Ms. Hopeless.
Don't ever show me your face again.
Where are you going?
What about the rest of the wedding?
What wedding?
I am a creative person.
I am not here to click pictures
of people eating Rasgullas (sweets).
Someone else will show up.
Buzz off, Shahrukh Khan!
And what about you?
She plans other people's weddings.
Look at her!
What's so funny about that?
You cannot get married and
you plan other people's wedding.
This is like asking a
bachelor to protect the women.
Get lost!
Jalandhar! Let's go, man!
Drive!
Why this Music won't stop?
What else can we do?
- Hello.
- Hello.
What happened to you, mom?
What happened??
She is too old to work.
She tripped and fell.
She is so delicate.
The bone crushed.
I'm dying out here.
Does it hurt a lot?
- No! I am starving.
- Huh?
Go and ask someone from
the village to come over..
..and cook for us.
Aunt!
Aunt, open the gate,
there is an emergency.
Tell me your urgency from right there.
Well, my mother has broken her arm.
Can you come over and cook for us?
There is bachelor living in
the neighbourhood, his name is Kartari.
He borrowed some lentils from
me last night and said it was too good.
He then asked for more,
and I hit him with the spatula.
You don't have any shame, do you?
Today you are asking me to cook for you..
..soon you will ask
me to settle down with you.
These bachelors don't fear God.
Aunt!
Aunt Listen!
Didn't I hear your song properly.
No, brother.
You go and send uncle.
The goat can't be trusted with
guarding grass. It shall eat it.
- Son, say uncle.
- Uncle.
- Say uncle again.
- Uncle.
A bachelor's coming this way.
Walk faster.
- Let's go!
- Sister-in-law!
Let's go! Run!
Sister-in-law!
No one is ready to come at my request.
Dad, You go and try.
I am not going anywhere.
I'll manage on my own.
Heed my advice.
Take a train to Uttar Pradesh tomorrow.
Buy yourself a bride from there.
I heard you can find
one for around 125,000.
She will take her own
sweet time to get well.
Till when can I keep cooking?
The girls I will get from there will
all like rice and not Roti (flatbread).
- How many do I make for you?
- Around seven?
Seven for you and five for me.
How much flour do I require?
Hello, lovers? What about me?
You buy yourself a packet
of buns from the bakery.
I can't cook for you too.
- Get it.
- Come on!
Chadta!
Oh! Chadta!
Your uncle's here!
What's the matter with him now?
Priest, you took me seriously.
Give him 101 rupees, dad.
Jalandhar, take him back,
he must have some important work.
He said you cannot get married.
We'll have to make some
other arrangements for food now..
- Should I beg him now?
- It's certain.
He cannot get married, but you can.
- Really?
- What the hell is he saying?
Hello?
Hi, how are you?
Me?
I am good.
There is a pre-wedding
shoot in Rajasthan.
Are you interested?
Huh?
Why are they getting
married in a desert?
Come on, here we don't have
enough money to poison ourselves..
..and people are
partying their life away.
No, I will be there.
Yes, yes.
But, Are you sure you want me there?
Yes, why?
You are talented.
No, we had a slight
misunderstand last time.
Oh come on,
that's common between professionals.
But, You won't fight with
me this time, will you?
No, I won't fight this time.
Yes, yes.
Then come here quickly.
See you soon.
I'm coming.
I'll be there soon.
I'll be taking back this 100, priest.
I got her call. Like he knows it all.
There is a higher power
above you who knows everything.
Get results in 20 days!
Sardar Saab (sir), shall I buy
you a Sehre(wedding headgear) ?
Thing is, cook for me too.
Otherwise I won't give you either.
Mrs. Chadta will be walking
these grounds within two months.
I don't want you complaining
later that your son separated from you.
We both had done Kikli together, right?
In the 8th grade science, I had studied..
..that moving in circular
motion produces heat.
If my heart's on fire, I am
sure she too must be feeling the heat.
Now I know it.
Hey, God!
Amazing!
Put some on me as well.
Uncle, can you play Chamkila?
Huh?
You should learn it now,
Chadta is here.
Oh wonderful!
Wassup, Gagan!
I seek your blessings, elderly.
You are elder to me, let me.
You won't change! Right?
I'm just kidding.
- You're making them spend a lot.
- It's okay.
You'll be paid well too.
Let's go.
I must think of a good theme then.
- Hurry up. - No need, I described
them the album you'd showed me.
- No, that's not possible.
- Why?
That's my personal album.
I've a better idea than that.
You can use it later.
It's not like you are going
to get married right away.
- Take those away.
- No, that is not possible.
Hey, buy him a bus ticket to go back.
I call him and offer work
but he wants to stay in Dhanoli.
- No problem.
- Whatever.
'Mrs. Chadta will be walking
these grounds within two months.'
'I don't want you complaining
later that your son separated from you.'
Your uncle is going to get his bride,
who is more beautiful than anyone.
Aunt, get 2,000 to
meet the daughter-in-law.
For pre-wedding, we want some
unique ideas.. something different.
Tell us if you have any unique idea
otherwise we will approach someone else.
There is no need to look any further.
I have a very unique idea.
And the photographer
too is very desi (rustic).
- Wait!
- Wait!
You were saying something?
No, you called out to me.
You called out first, right Gagan?
- No, you did.
- Come on!
Fine, I called out first.
Humans are flexible,
madam, if you are rigid, you are dead.
I wanted to ask,
how can anyone survive without marriage?
You are scared, aren't you?
I'm not scared.
Will you ever agree with me?
You are so stubborn.
It's quite clear.
I am scared of dogs.
I don't go close to them.
I think you feel the same about marriage.
Tell me, which car do you like?
I love Jeep.
Awesome.
You should consider me
as a 4x4 Jeep henceforth.
And our company is giving
you a free test drive.
There is no harm in that, right?
You just give me a chance to
be your husband at this wedding.
I might be able to change
the way you think.
And in exchange,
I'll shoot whatever and however you want.
Otherwise, you won't?
No, like I had said before,
that's not possible.
Fine, give him the room next to mine.
Give him that room, ma'am?
Just do as I said.
- But you will shoot that.
- I'll cause a storm.
We'll do just what we're told,
right Gagan?
So, did you get a raise?
'Look, if you manage to convince her..'
'..it'll be quite a sight,
every one in the village jealous of me.'
"This Jatt's Expensive..."
"All that is remaining..."
"I have never showed off."
"My nature is composed"
"I am a simple person."
"I have simple rules."
"I'm a young hot blooded romeo,
desired by all the Juliets"
"But I don't give them any attention"
"This Jatt has willed all his
Expensive breathes to you"
"All the remaining breathes of
my life I give to you."
"This Jatt's Expensive..."
"Nothing else matters now,
I'm so in love with you"
"At such a prime age,
I groom only for you"
"That's why I follow you around."
"I sing with the wind."
"I'm full of so much joy
and excitement "
"This Jatt has willed all his
Expensive breathes to you"
"All the remaining breathes
of my life I give to you."
"This Jatt's Expensive..."
"I already commanded a lot respect.."
"You only added to it."
"You became my kite
and I became your string."
"You rule my heart,
sweetheart your Chadta will..."
"do anything for you!"
"This Jatt has willed all his
Expensive breathes to you"
"All the remaining breathes of
my life I give to you."
"This Jatt's Expensive..."
"This Jatt's Expensive..."
"All the precious breathe left.."
What a relief!
"If you were a weapon.."
"You'd be quite lethal."
"Don't make me slap you,
why did you start this fire?"
Who is it?
It's me, Chadta.
What are you doing here?
Wait.
There was no soap in my room.
But then I faced the
same problem here as well.
You carry too many bottles with you.
So, I used a little of everything.
- This is a hair conditioner.
- Oh I see!
This is what I was searching for.
Let me use some perfume.
Oh, my God!
It's for women.
Do they have separate
perfumes for men and women?
A fragrance will always be fragrant.
We have just one prickle heat powder.
Our whole family uses it.
We all use the same towel too.
It helps to keep love alive.
- Show me what else do you have!
- Please!
Please don't touch.
They are my personal things.
What's the need to hide
between a husband and a wife?
What's your is mine what's mine is yours.
Here this mustard oil
of mine is all yours. Take it.
Apply it on head and
your head will never ache.
Put some in your nose and
you'll never have a blockage.
Pour some in your belly button
and your lips will never chap.
It's no ordinary oil,
it's a scientific miracle.
I don't need it, you can keep your oil.
Tell me, how did you
open the lock of my room?
No biggie, I told them it's
my wife's room, open the door.
They opened it immediately.
You.. should go back to your room.
Please go.
Shall I say something as
new as a freshly printed 100 bucks?
Today I saw a sight that
you'd never see in life.
What?
You know how beautiful you look asleep?
You when awake are
nothing compared to that.
- Bye!
- Ta-ta.
Photo won't be the same, Mrs. Chadta.
Here you go.
It's not a big deal.
If doesn't make a difference
as to what people say.
I'll treat my wife like I want to.
It's between us.
When you will make rotis,
I'll chop the vegetables.
- My father too has learnt
how to temper a dish. - Oh.
Help is necessary, isn't it?
When two people will eat it
then shouldn't two people prepare it?
Very good.
You know how to chop vegetables
and your father knows how to temper them.
- Yes. - Because I don't know
how to cook anything.
Huh?
Oh yes, I eat salad at night.
If you want to eat something
then go downstairs and have it.
Salad?
Salad.
Salad.
Jackass! All that he promised
me before was just a false dream!
It would have been
better if he was a girl.
Quietly eat it.
You shouldn't be angry
with food and wife.
This is delicious.
We will only eat lettuce henceforth.
It is so tasty.
From where did you learn to make it?
Butter chicken, Dal Makhani
with seven rotis cannot compete with it.
No way!
It is a hit!
Listen, there are no camels here.
We are in is Ranthambore.
There are tigers here.
You should go and click
some pictures tomorrow.
'You are so clever.'
'You want to kill Chadta.'
- Very nice. Beautiful.
- Yeah. Where you from?
Good evening.
Hi!
Good evening, ma'am.
- How did the shoot go?
- It was very nice, ma'am.
- The theme that you'd told
us for the shoot.. - Yes?
- Brother suggested something
even better. - Oh.
Sir, can I say something?
Go ahead, son.
Sir, your girl's marriage..
it's your daughter's wedding.
Are you happy?
- Yes, I'm very happy.
- Very good.
- And you too?
- Very happy.
- This is great.
- Are you happier or is it just the same?
Same. This is a limit.
Our kids got married.
- Then this is not right.
- Why?
So what if he is the father of the bride?
- He's equally happy.
- He is.
There is a Turla on your
turban and there isn't any on his.
That is right.
He too should have it, right?
- Yes, he does.
- Then I'll make one for him right away.
There, he's made a Turla.
- Doesn't that look great?
- Very good, very good.
You deceived me.
You shot something else, didn't you?
Your clients are happy, aren't they?
Your job is done.
Then why bother?
Who bloody knows whether
or not I'll ever get married.
But that album treasures my feelings.
And I sell photos and not feelings.
Drink?
You drink too?
Yes, why?
So?
Good night.
Wait, let me to open a beer bar for you!
Calm down, unwilling bachelor.
We'll service her right after marriage.
Yes.
You don't?
Drink?
No, let's have some.
- Yes.
- Get me a drink!
Cheers.
This is great!
We will now do the Milni
(meet the family) ritual.
Give me that.
- Here.
- Here.
- There you go.
- This is wrong.
Then whisper into my ears what is right.
No, what you are getting done is right.
This is what has always been happening.
It is an old ritual of ours.
But he is giving his daughter to them.
Now you expect him to give
his daughter and also blankets..
This is wrong, don't you think?
Let the groom's father
give the blankets at least.
He is right.
There you go then.
Take this, sir.
- Give it here.
- You give it to him.
Let me give it to you.
My pleasure.
Welcome.
What are you staring at!
I am not going to change
the ribbon cutting ritual.
You'll have to give the gifts,
and not your sisters-in-law.
Come on, move it.
Look at what he is doing.
- Come on.
- Let's go, son.
Auntie, please move aside a little.
Let me handle this.
Let's go.
Don't you think you are showing
too much concern for the bride's father?
I hate these rituals.
But I cannot speak out at every wedding.
You are handling everything here
so I thought I should tweak a few things.
Do you really think
that way or I must say..
..the test drive vehicle
is putting up a good show.
No, no, no.
No gimmicks when it comes to daughters.
I am yet to get married.
I am sure that when I get married..
..I will be crying more than
the bride when she'll leave for my house.
It is not easy to part
with a piece of your heart.
Look over there, they are
about to display my creative shoot.
Don't pretend to be neutral.
Clap if you like it.
Soni jumped into the river
with a unbaked pot to save Mahiwal.
She couldn't get him out.
But then we used the same pot
the get the water out of their system.
Hey, hey, hey!
Cut, cut, cut!
I only asked you to pretend,
why are you beating him up for real?
What?
You bloody.. look at that now.
You would have scattered his berries!
We apologise for that.
The Rajasthanis thrashed
your son by mistake.
Punnu's brother whisked
him away on a camel.
Sassi ran after him
but the sand was too hot.
Then Sassi thought,
forget it, I'll find someone better.
This proves that desert
sand more heat than love does.
Thank you.
He's funny.
He's too much.
"Against your fair complexion.."
"Every colour pales in comparison."
"You are crazy about money"
"For me that means nothing"
"Anyone who flirts with you,
I will show them what I'm made of,"
"I will tear apart their
attitude, my love!"
"You should prance around freely"
"Always dress up pretty."
"I'll take care of all the boys
who bother you, my love!"
"You should prance around freely"
"Always dress up pretty."
"I'll take care of all the boys
who bother you, my love!"
"You should never let youth
pass away timidly"
"Youth is colourful, meant
to be lived freely!"
"Give a thought to the one next to you,
he looks the best with you"
"And by god's grace he's also a sardar!"
"He's well respected all around"
"He doesn't have any vices"
"All he need's is your love!!"
"You should prance around freely"
"Always dress up pretty."
"I'll take care of all the boys
who bother you, my love!"
"You should prance around freely"
"Always dress up pretty."
"I'll take care of all the boys
who bother you, my love!"
"My loveoh my love!!"
"No boys match up to your beauty."
"I will take care of all the ones
hovering around you"
"Stop puting sequins on
your dupatta, my love"
"I will get the stars down for you!"
""I want to see the way you move.""
""The way you lift your feet..""
"Your gait is mesmerizing, my love."
"You should prance around freely"
"Always dress up pretty."
"I'll take care of all the boys
who bother you, my love!"
"You should prance around freely"
"Always dress up pretty."
"I'll take care of all the boys
who bother you, my love!"
So, did you make to
learn any song of Chamkila?
Let me show you one.
It's easy.
It's not that tough.
When he roared for the time..
- We did it!
- Thank you, ma'am.
Once again, thanks ma'am.
- All good, sister-in-law?
- Oh.
- I am absolutely fine.
- Good.
- How about you?
- Good.
- Our parents are going well?
- Yes.
Tell me, shall I make tea for
you or would you like to have some milk?
- Make me some tea.
- Okay.
Would you like to eat something?
- How about some foxnuts?
- Don't worry..
..you can service that after your wedding.
Then how about some Jalebis (sweets)?
How will you service that now, Chadta?
Do you have blood or water
flowing in your veins, hopeless fellow?
Look at him sitting there like an idiot.
Get up and show them your culture.
Damn you!
One second, I'll get Jalebis for you.
Bold at home and shy outside
and she says her name is Melo.
Wait, I'll teach you a lesson.
I'll feed you pudding!
Come inside with me.
Should I teach you how to hug someone?
- Shall I open a beer bar for you?
- Leave my plait.
- I eat salad for dinner!
- Ouch!
Wait, I'll give you salad!
You too wait,
I'll feed you the sweets myself.
Wait, you precious brother-in-law!
- Sorry?
- Huh?
Look, I have some personal
reasons for not getting married.
I anyway didn't want to get married.
Even if you had stayed
here for six months.
I only wanted to get
some work out of you.
The first condition
of this wedding contract..
..was the pre-wedding
shoot based on your concept.
So you are like a dog's tail.
But after I got to know you, and seeing
your respect for the bride' family..
..I thought that you
are not a bad person.
I am a very good person.
I am just like a bitter gourd.
I might be bitter,
but I am quite beneficial.
There are many ready
to be the son-in-law.
But no one wants to be a son.
Drop it. I forgive you.
But there is something
I too have hidden from you.
Really?
Then you too are like a dog's tail.
If you had been my wife, I would've
beaten you up 36 times in 4 days.
This is great.
This is what marriage means?
I mean you have to make
so many adjusts in a marriage?
You have an issue with everything.
Wait for you to put on some makeup.
Then wait for you to remove your makeup.
This isn't style or attitude,
it is trouble.
Where are your feet, elderly?
You have made me see the truth.
Men don't let women do what they please.
Women don't let men do what they please.
You were absolutely right.
What was that you said about the fish?
A woman needs a man as
much as a fish needs a bicycle.
Right.
And a man needs a woman
like a frog needs a blanket.
Now whether or not
someone buys this vehicle..
..it is not going to go to anyone.
The ones who get married are dogs.
Say it!
You too say it, it's good.
The ones who get married are dogs.
- The ones who get married are dogs.
- Yes!
Come on, let's play now.
Now, I don't want to play.
Mom?
You are here.
Sahib?
Thank God they are fine.
What have you gathered a crowd here?
They are here because of your wedding.
Tell them, son.
They are all here. Later we will
have to go and tell everyone individually.
Let's invite everyone
and get over with this.
Here.
Oh I see.
It's not needed.
I got enlightened.
One doesn't gain anything
by getting married.
I won't get married.
I had told you, he cannot get married.
My knowledge too means something.
"Two unwilling bachelors
play a shared drum every night."
"My weak heart beats
too fast with fright."
Look at him.
Oh no, I danced in front of my elders!
Come on Chadta, accept your mistake.
This is a case of grapes are soar.
Nonsense.
You couldn't even taste its seeds, boss.
I had made a bet with your sister-in-law.
You have ruined my reputation.
I know all about your achievements.
Where's the towel?
Can you hold the kids for second?
Who is calling you?
Who will dry the bathroom
after having a bath?
Wash the utensils.
Who do you have at home a wife or a cop?
Even the bathroom drainage isn't
as low as you have stooped, brother.
Try talking to another woman and seek,
they'll come after your neck.
Where as they will talk freely
to the jeweller, trailer, retailer.
Show me that one...
No, not that one. Show me that one.
No, the designs you are showing me aren't
as beautiful as you're showing others.
They too are ready with their replies.
Everything suits you.
You can wear whatever you want.
Here if someone praises
your twisted moustaches..
..then she'll have you
shave them off tomorrow itself.
You all are like a rat trapped in a cage.
Look at you taunting me!
They say give women equal rights.
We will walk shoulder to shoulder.
What shoulders?
They have crossed our
shoulders long back.
They jump over our heads these days.
And aunt, you?
What did you gain by getting married?
You spent your life
getting thrashed by uncle.
You raised your sons.
And now your sons refuse
to acknowledge you.
He drinks alcohol worth
300 and picks up a fight.
Has he ever even offered you
a 10 bucks cold drink affectionately?
He always runs out of
money when it comes to you.
When a Jatt gives away his calf,
he seeks at least 2,500 rupees.
You surprise me!
Are you that bad..
..that they give you away and
shell out 2.5 million for dowry as well.
A smart white female has rightly said:
A woman needs a man as
much as a fish needs a bicycle.
Priest, this isn't a curse,
it is a blessing.
Now forget a chicken,
I won't even offer chicken shit..
..to anyone who comes
over with a wedding proposal.
Brother, I'd say that the
ones who get married are dogs.
Move aside.
God formed all relationships before hand.
The ones that are necessary.
A mother, a father,
a brother, a sister, uncles and aunts.
A husband and wife's
relationship isn't necessary.
We have created this
problem for ourselves.
Have you ever seen animals get married?
These birds and animals
are smarter than us.
The earth is female and the sky is male.
Look how far God has
kept them from each other.
They said Hindus and Muslims will fight..
..so keep them different
in separate countries.
If you really wanted the fight to end..
..then you should have
sent the women to Pakistan.
They would keep celebrating
Teeya in Lahore..
..and we would have a good time here.
Now neither do they celebrate
Teeya nor do they let us have a good time.
They all want to talk about marriage.
Thank you, Sahib.
We don't know for how long your
mother will have her arm in a cast.
I'm fed up.
I have to get up early
to make preparations..
..and I leave the kitchen in the
afternoon after cleaning the utensils..
..it is already time to start
making preparations for dinner.
Don't worry father,
we'll come up with some solution.
If you want, I can get food
from a Dhabba (roadside eatery).
For how many days will
we eat Dhabba food?
Look..
..after a certain age,
a father becomes a friend.
These days boys like boys too.
Anyway, it's not a problem,
whatever makes them happy.
Do you want to show yourself to a doctor?
Don't worry, I am not your father.
I am your friend.
Best friend when did I
tell you that I don't like girls?
I just don't want to get married.
Nowadays 35-40% people
in Japan don't get married.
World's smartest people live there.
You should feel happy that
your son thinks like the Japanese do.
Come on! He pretends to be my friend!
What does he say?
He says... be happy,
you gave birth to a Japanese.
I am never going to
get out of the kitchen duty.
Stop!
Stop, stop, stop...
Are you going for the wedding?
No, the wedding will
take place day after tomorrow.
Today we are just doing
a small pre-wedding photo shoot.
Get them, Bhinda.
It's my girlfriend's wedding.
How can anyone click any photos?
I won't spare anyone.
I have already thrashed the cook.
And now I'll thrash the photographer.
Come on brother, how are we at fault?
It's my wish.
Who wants to know what's your fault?
You know how true and pure my love was?
How much I loved her?
The ones who sat next to her in college...
The ones who used to feed her burgers...
The ones who used to
take her out on movies...
I attacked all of them.
If you don't believe me then ask him.
No brother, I believe that
you turned them black and blue.
So why do you need to thrash us now?
Who says I thrashed them?
I got thrashed by all of them.
All of them...
Look, I used to go and attack them..
..and people used to come to my rescue.
Okay.
Now when I have been
thrashed so many times..
..why shouldn't I too thrash a few?
How is this fair?
She isn't going to
be your girlfriend anymore.
She is getting married day after tomorrow.
She will become someone's wife.
Now she won't be any
good to you as someone's wife.
This is like monkey feasts
while the bear gets the stick.
He will be the bear,
you are the monkey, brother.
You'll get us beaten up, boss.
What you said is stored
in a mind just like..
..the songs are stored in a memory card.
That's it. There the story ends.
You should leave, brother.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you, brother.
Thank you.
- Shall we?
- Leave it to me.
- Make seven for me.
- I know.
How are you, father sahib?
Still struggling to cook.
- How are you, mom? All good?
- Yes.
Don't do this, son.
You cannot survive
without getting married.
Till when will my husband
keep burning his fingers?
You won't drop this, will you?
You two don't want me to stay Japanese.
How can one not survive, mom?
Tell me, have you lived your
life as you pleased even for a single day?
Don't you think you spent
your life as per your husband's will?
You too know how much one
has to tolerate after marriage.
I'll tolerate.
Are you sure?
I am sure.
Okay then get ready.
Consider me married by tomorrow morning.
Get ready both of you.
"You're such a loving girl..."
"I love it..."
"I love it..."
Son, we need to go to the doctor today,
to get my hand examined.
No mom, she wants me
to take her to a parlour.
She wants a pedicure done.
She will get upset.
Huh?
What are you staring at?
She is your daughter-in-law.
Kylie.
Kylie, seek mother's blessings.
What?
She won't be seeking your blessings,
she's a little too advanced.
She says, she is your mother and not mine,
I won't touch her feet!
Okay then, bye.
We are going to watch a movie after that.
- We'll be a late.
- Okay, bye.
"I love it!"
Son, please cook us some rotis.
Your father says it is your turn today.
No, we had gone to watch a movie,
we had a pizza there.
Kylie says,
the one who needs it should make it.
She's so funny!
Okay, good night.
"I love it!"
Chadta! Open the door!
What is it?
Your father wants you to cook today.
Mom she says,
doesn't your mother have any sense..
..she is knocking at her young
son and daughter-in-law's door?
We are a newly married couple.
We could have been doing a million things.
What did you say?
Mom, Kylie says you are poisoning
our sweet moments on purpose.
You still feed your old man, don't you?
Hey, hello! Don't address him as old man,
he is my father sahib.
Address him as sahib.
She says, he must be your sahib..
..it's not like I am doing
to ask him to make vermicelli for me.
Okay, don't disturb us.
Okay, bye, ta-ta.
"The boy's grandma is so happy!"
Mother, you just had a grandson.
Congratulations.
My brave boy!
Kylie said that the old hag
wanted a grandson so desperately.
Now let the grandma
look after her grandson.
What are you doing?
- Stop it.
- Here.
Keep it away.
Keep it aside.
No, mom. He's just a baby. He'll fall.
Give some love to your grandma.
Don't wet my clothes!
Don't do it!
Mom, Kylie says she wants your earrings.
Mom, Kylie says she wants me to leave you.
She says either you or she will stay here.
Mom, my son wants a brother.
Shall I get do it?
Mom, kylie says she wants
to get you two arrested for dowry.
She says she wants to get rid of you.
Heard that?
Mom, Kylie says she wants to
hit you while hiding behind a trunk.
Mom, kylie says you two are
worse than a newly wedding couple.
Look mom, this is what's going to happen.
Like sahib got made
you distance away from me..
..she will make me distance away from you.
Give it a thought.
Oh no, who kept my son down?
Hold him.
Congratulations, mom.
You too have become Japanese.
Guddi, you are okay with this?
He is right.
I'll never let my son get married.
"I'll never let my child get married."
Do you think I am your
servant to cook for you?
Keep ordering from
a Dhabba for all I care!
Hey, he is no less than Kylie.
Idiots couldn't arrange meal for
themselves and ending up stealing mine.
Open your mouth, mom.
"I don't worry about
The phone or the net pack."
"Like a wild flower,
I have my freedom intact."
"I don't worry about
the phone or the net pack."
"Like a wild flower,
I have my freedom intact."
"Neither do I wake up before noon.."
"Nor do I have a rose in my hand."
"This Jatt's freedom has been written
from above. Life is great."
"God is generous to all my
brothers who are still unmarried.
"This Jatt's freedom has been written
from above. Life is great."
"...for all my unmarried brothers,
for all my unmarried brothers."
"I cannot be a part of the grind."
"I like keep a distance
and enjoy the show."
"I never went too deep into anything."
"I enjoy a good game of
cards at the village square."
"All those who studied
with me are now on high posts."
"This Jatt's freedom has been written
from above. Life is great."
"God is generous to all my
brothers who are still unmarried.
"This Jatt's freedom has been written
from above. Life is great."
"...for all my unmarried brothers,
for all my unmarried brothers."
"I never went by the clock.."
"It's not like there's
someone special waiting for me."
"I cook my own meal..
and I enjoy it completely."
"I wear a kurta-pyjama
and a sturdy turban."
"This Jatt's freedom has been written
from above. Life is great."
"God is generous to all my
brothers who are still unmarried.
"This Jatt's freedom has been written
from above. Life is great."
"...for all my unmarried brothers,
for all my unmarried brothers."
"Brother, I'd say that the
ones who get married are dogs."
How are you doing, brother?
- Everything good?
- How are you?
I'm thought I'll come
book you for a shoot.
For?
I'm getting married.
I want you to cover it.
- You are getting married?
- Yes.
- For real?
- For real.
That's great, man! Congratulations.
What's your budget?
Don't worry about the budget.
I want nothing but perfection.
Oh come on! Let's get on with it then!
I'm good at my job.
- We'll do whichever theme you like.
- Really?
There's one more.
But this one's a little expensive.
It's special.
I've never done this theme for anyone.
That's more like it!
Then I'll do this one.
I too am unique.
Look into my eyes.
Aren't they like that of a tiger?
I'm scared.
You'll work for the bride as well.
You don't worry about it.
Just make sure that the payment..
You don't worry about the payment.
Then it's all good.
- You are my brother.
- Yes.
We will pay you just fine.
You are my brother. You won't
charge me a bomb and make a profit.
We have a relationship
that'll last forever.
Hello! It will break.
Sunanda is charging that much?
Doesn't she know me?
- She stays in Mohali.
- Sunanda Sharma?
I too have stayed in 3B for two months.
Then we are from the same village,
Mohali, aren't we?
That makes us siblings.
Now she wants to make
profit from her brother?
Yes.
Tell her I'll pay her a few
bucks more during Raksha Bandhan.
And a few extra gifts in Sandhara.
Forget her.
How much does Anmol charge?
Quickly get the crates from there.
Good to see you, Mela Singh!
So you are behind this bright
and cheerful atmosphere here?
Come on, brother.
I can't do that kind of work all my life.
Till when can I supply a
crowd at a commission of 200 rupees.
I am a matchmaker here.
You've become a matchmaker?
- There you go.
- A match made in heaven.
Oh great, this looks like a reunion!
Hello!
How are you, Fish-Without-A-Bicycle?
How are you?
I seek your blessings, elderly.
By the way, you didn't
offer me any wedding after that.
It's okay.
I manage to do around two
dozen weddings a month on my own.
I came here to click
pictures for a few rituals.
You know that helps
in making a good album.
Tell me, are you doing the Galla
or the Fanda ritual at this wedding?
Remember that?
I can't find the bride.
It's your wedding?
Right?
Have you lost your mind?
You swear?
After parting such
a good knowledge to me..
..you are falling into that very trap?
Who got you fooled?
Hello, son.
Hello, hello.
- You're the photographer?
- Yes.
- What's wrong with you?
- Okay. Good, good.
- Make sure they turn out well.
- Of course.
Actually, you don't need to click
many pictures like the villagers do.
I don't like that.
- Have you gone crazy?
- Serve him.
Okay.
Oh, my precious diamond..
Looking so sweet.
Did you meet Pammi auntie?
Mummy?
She's been looking for you.
Let's go. I'll take you to her.
Come, come, come.
She's getting married...
Boss, these high standard people
are serving corn with lime juice.
Potato wedges?
Potatoes?
Even the government doesn't
give them a second glance.
Are they serving any chicken?
Our madam has a kind heart.
She is against animal killing.
- Where are they serving alcohol?
- Close to the gate.
- Let's go then.
- Let's go.
Smile!
Move aside.
God doesn't punch or kick you...
God always just make
you lose your mind.
And you have lost your mind.
So now the fish knows
how to ride a bicycle?
I am the only child.
So I wasn't getting married
because of my parents.
So they found me a husband
who'd stay with them after marriage.
Nothing's more important
than your parents, right?
Hats off to your parents.
I got Sahib into kitchen
duty because of you.
Have you seen anyone buying
cycle after test driving a Jeep?
Have you had a good look at the boy?
He looks like a monkey.
He's something out of this world.
Good looks aren't
the only thing important.
He's at least not a
sinner who beats his wife.
It's not a sin, it's a good deed.
In villages mothers-in-law don't send..
..their daughters-in-law to their
maternal homes for more than 10 days.
"Come back, dear.
We don't like it here without you."
And wives whose husbands service them..
..have the privilege of getting
upset and staying..
..in their maternal homes
for months together.
Doesn't that make it a great deal?
Then there is council meeting
that called for as well.
It last for 4-5 days,
it's quite entertaining.
Not all villagers can go Shimla.
Nothing can be done about you.
I am not interested.
You shouldn't do it too either.
It is my life, I'll do as I please.
Why does it bother you?
No... I just cannot accept this.
Why?
- Hello, sir.
- Hi.
Sir, I am her friend.
I'll tell you about me.
- Now let tell you who I am.
- Okay.
- SP Mohali, Kabul Singh.
- Okay, sir.
- I am Vanjhli's uncle.
- Okay, sir.
We have barely managed
to convince her to get married.
- Stop counselling her.
- Okay, sir.
- And stick to doing your work... nicely.
- Okay, sir.
He...
They'll turn us black and blue, boss.
The bones they break don't
even show up on the x-ray.
I too want to play.
He's in my team.
Amazing!
It's a great picture.
- Awesome, right?
- Yes.
I heard that you're going to
stay at your in-laws after the wedding?
So, will you be having
the sending off ceremony too?
I didn't think about that.
So will I have to cry
as well when they send me away?
Looks like it.
"My father's sending me away..."
"Let me stay a day more..."
"Oh my father..."
Father!
Father!
This isn't fair.
You will send me away?
"Oh my father, I left my tractor behind."
"Father..."
Shut up.
Why are you crying?
They own a huge chunk of land. 38 acres.
And did you look at their bungalow?
We'll live in luxury.
Not even our next five generations..
..will be able to accumulate
this kind of wealth.
Her parents will anyway
die in the next few years.
Otherwise, we will bring her here anyway.
They cannot back out after the wedding.
Please have your drinks.
But what's wrong is wrong.
You tell me.
Look brother, this is your call.
But greed and self respect
are two different things.
You are a man, right?
Will you look good if you
are always under your wife's thumb?
You are right.
- I've understood what
you're trying to say. - Yes.
You are jealous of me.
You don't want me to get married.
I don't want to hear a thing you say.
You stick to clicking pictures, okay?
I don't want to listen to you.
Didn't my girlfriend
get married and go away?
Yes, she did.
What does she think,
no one else can do that?
I'll get married and go away too.
Tit for tat.
Father, make a drink for me as well.
Jalandhar, do you remember we
used to pluck berries when we were kids?
Yes, boss.
We'd gather all the ripe
and raw ones and fill our pockets.
And you were they only
one who used to try..
..to break free flax berries
still on the branch.
Many times, you weren't able to get them.
And you'd return empty-handed.
No, this time I had managed get them..
..but that kid stole them
and put them in his pocket.
Forget it, boss.
How does it concern you anyway?
It's not like you want
to get married to her.
I mean you never want to get married.
Or is your heart calling out for love?
No, I cannot hear anything.
- You're sure?
- Yes.
You can check.
Can you hear it?
No boss, it's a-okay.
- You heard anything?
- I didn't.
I cannot hear it either. I too am fine.
- Keep drinking, if you cannot hear it.
- Pour me another one.
Here you go.
You used to only sell photographs,
Mr. Chadta.
You have started selling feelings too now?
You didn't accept it before Jalandhar..
..but you should accept the fact now..
Your heart aches, doesn't it?
Sir!
I seek your blessings, elderly.
You are drunk!
Get me something to eat.
Sure, why don't I make
you some fresh Malpuas (sweets)?
It's not like drink every day.
No, why don't you have it every day!
That's what's left to be done!
I'll teach this Jalandhar
a lesson one day.
He is the one who calls
you boss and beguile you.
Listen...
What makes great,
you get the snake to bite your tongue?
Do you get a better high in a bar?
Why can't people drink at home?
There could be someone
else who'd like to have some too.
I forgot!
Shall I get some now?
You'd love some commotion
in your calm life, wouldn't you?
That Vanjhli should scold
you for some reason or the other.
What else is love?
This is the sign of true love,
you actually welcome a scolding.
"I already commanded a lot respect..."
"You only added to it."
"You became my kite.."
Boss, you don't have to ask a father
for his daughter's hand in marriage.
You have to steal a guava from a monkey.
People only notice an unwilling
bachelor's helpless and not his love.
She isn't concerned about you at all..
..whether you can hear Alghozas
or Chimtas (musical instruments).
Forget it.
You never purchase tickets
for a train which has already left.
I won't be able to get out my heart.
But we can get rid of him.
Hello!
No mom, I don't want to get married.
I don't care what the villagers say.
I want freedom.
Lions don't get domesticated.
Dogs and cats get domesticated.
Yes.
I cannot stay under
my wife's thumb forever.
She'd say don't do this, don't do that.
Why shouldn't I do it?
What?
She has 35 acres of
land touching the road.
So what?
I don't care if she is their only child.
You can only trap a mouse with
a piece of cheese and not a lion.
Okay mom, bye.
No, that's my final decision.
What you are saying is
as clear as the environment.
But I have already started the fire.
I've learnt that you are a very smart man.
I am not smart.
I was stupid.
It is your future wife
who talked some sense into me.
We experimented.
We stayed together.
As husband and wife.
We concluded that you
can nothing from marriage.
I don't know what
made her change her mind.
What do you mean by stayed together?
Try to understand, we stayed together.
We drank and eat together.
I used to bathe in her bathroom.
We even shared a towel.
I used her perfume.
We used to apply mustard
oil on each other's head.
I mean we've done everything
that a newly wed couple does..
We had a lot of fun.
But from all the fun that
we can we concluded that fun is good.
Fun is not bad.
But not marriage.
Look brother,
I am a modern boy, open-minded.
So what if you two stayed together?
It's okay.
Everyone has a past.
- I don't want to hear anything you say.
That's it. - Fine.
You're an open-minded person?
Fine then.
Fine.
It's fine.
Boss's super clever.
There is a reason I call him boss.
He gets the snake to bite his tongue.
Don't be so open-minded
that your wife is out every day..
..getting her pictures clicked.
Look over there.
Thank you.
- I'll pour this down my throat.
- Get down, son.
- I'll shoot my brains off.
- No, son.
- I'll jump from the rooftop.
- NO! Don't!
- Listen to me! - I don't want to
get married to her, come what may!
I'll... I'll stuff this in my mouth.
- Listen to me!
- I don't want to hear anything.
Move back, father.
Please don't send me there.
Mother, why don't you listen to me?
Why don't you share my sorrows?
Why didn't you strangle
me as soon as I was born?
Where's the matchmaker?
Matchmaker, keep that bottle down!
- It keep down.
- I just did, brother.
- Get lost from here!
- Whatever you want, brother.
Hey Tent Guy,
untie the tent or else I'll shoot you.
And the cooks, kill the fire.
Throw the sweets on the streets or else..
..you'll be found scattered
on the ground like beads!
Get lost!
Stop doing dancing, old hags!
Is your father getting married here?
They want to do Malwai Gidda!
If you want to do something
then start wailing instead.
Do this!
You don't want to?
Then buzz off!
Get lost!
- Otherwise, I'll shooting at everyone.
- Run!
- Don't listen to him!
- Come on!
- Get lost, everyone!
- Come on!
No wedding is going to take place here.
There is going to be a wedding!
He has gone crazy!
What did you say, you had a trial run?
You think you are the only
who's been through this phase?
We too were once young.
We never did any trials.
We have spoilt you with our love.
You should have at least
taken our honour into consideration.
Boss, a single glass in their house costs
more than all your utensils put together.
Why would they give her to you?
Sir...
I didn't know... I said it unknowingly.
This is nonsense.
You don't even know how to talk.
This is too much.
You must file a case.
Arrest him as well.
- No. - And file a case against
the groom's family too.
I want double of all the
money that I've spent so far.
How much could have
you spent on potatoes?
This is you being quite
narrow minded, auntie.
What's wrong if we stayed together?
Oh no, now everyone will talk about this..
..whenever you'll approach
anyone with her wedding proposal.
Now no one will want marry her, auntie.
But that doesn't mean that
you'll marry her off to me.
I am a poor artist.
It's not that bad.
Artists do tend to become hit overnight.
But at the moment,
I am not at par with your level.
Absolutely correct.
Yes, sir.
Look dear,
filing a case won't solve the problem.
I think this boy is good enough.
Yes.
- He is a Sardar.
- Yes.
- He is an artist.
- Yes.
He isn't of our level
now... but he can rise.
- Thank you, sir.
- They both know each other.
He is a good option.
Dad, you are very much right.
How is he right?
I am not a good artist.
Half the pictures
that I click are blurred.
We just got beaten in the
previous wedding, ask Jalandhar.
Brother, if yours is
fixed then can I leave?
He is good, very good.
- You have made the right choice.
- No.
Mela Singh is right.
You don't have any other option.
But what kind of a choice is this?
I'm a struggler.
You should pay my house visit.
Even the flies don't
want to stick around there.
They seek better homes.
She is your precious diamond.
You should keep her
safe in your house, auntie.
No one will take her.
Mom, if he doesn't want
to then why are you forcing him?
Give us a minute.
Do you want a tight slap now?
You want her not to force
myself and get humiliated?
They have just one option left now.
They can either listen
to me or save their reputation.
Shut up!
My dad is never wrong.
No, he is right.
But I cannot lose my freedom.
Your father too will have to agree to it.
Yes, I can enquire about that.
Nonsense!
Want a slap?
Kaku!
Ask the inspector to
send over a jeep, Deepa.
If you tell us the way
to your village then it's okay..
..otherwise I know where
the police station is.
They'll get the shock of their
lives when they'll learn about your plan.
If your luck is bad, even the
deepest secrets get revealed before time.
I'll let them on it
after we have a few kids.
In the meanwhile let them
believe that they've caught a fish.
They don't know that they
are railing in a crocodile.
Crocodile tears.
I don't want to get married, Jalandhar!
Uncle, take me away from here quickly.
I don't want to get married.
This is wrong,
when he doesn't want to get married..
Think only about yourself.
You don't need to do social service.
And hadn't you fallen for
him during the wedding in Rajasthan?
Don't lie to me.
You were all gloomy till yesterday.
Today you're trying to hide your smile.
He'll fall in love with
you after you two have a few kids.
In the meanwhile quietly go with the flow.
It is a love marriage for
you and an arranged marriage for him.
You've wet your shirt again today.
Chadta? What is doing in a police jeep?
I'm sure he's done something wrong.
It's not like he got appointed
as Deputy Commissioner.
SP sir's niece and your
son were together in Rajasthan.
Now he refuses to marry her.
They have arranged for a small
ring ceremony function at home.
They want you there.
My son won't get married, let me tell you.
SP sir asked to be say
it politely only three times.
It's a request. This is the second time.
They will break our knees.
At the moment they are requesting.
I am ready.
I won't let my son get married.
That's three. It's a request.
I don't want to get married.
I don't want to wear a ring.
You can hold my hand and force
me to wear it otherwise I'll throw this.
- You want slap? Sit quietly.
- I don't..
There.
No, I..
Why are you looking at me? Nonsense!
Look at the camera.
- Smile.
- Cheese.
Listen to me, I might have worn the ring..
..but I am not getting
married today or tomorrow.
Now don't say that I'll have to
also do a pre wedding shoot or something.
Listen, Kaku will take you
to the police station otherwise.
I'm tell you.
What's the idea?
Hey, show me that pre wedding book.
Jalandhar, don't show it to them,
it's in bag on my motorbike.
I don't want to get married.
I say keep quiet,
otherwise I'll give you a tight slap.
Smile!
Go get it,
or do you want me to get a tight slap?
"There's twinkle in the Jatti's eyes"
"Just like the love NRI's have for Punjab"
"Just like the love NRI's have for Punjab"
"There's twinkle in the Jatti's eyes"
"Just like the love NRI's have for Punjab"
"She visits me in my dreams every day.."
".. and asks me the way to my home "
"She's so in love with this Jatt.."
"She has started preparing
for our wedding."
"She's so in love with this Jatt.."
"She has started preparing
for our wedding."
"She's so in love with this Jatt.."
"She has started preparing
for our wedding."
"Her dupattas have become more colourful"
"The blush on her face
is glowing more brighter"
"Her tired eyes reveal
her sleepless nights"
"In her dreams she's
already seen us married"
"She keeps asking her friend what
colour she should wear on her wedding"
"She's so in love with this Jatt.."
"She has started preparing
for our wedding."
"She's so in love with this Jatt.."
"She has started preparing
for our wedding."
"Someone has stolen something
precious from a glass palace"
"Oh you handsome man in
an almond coloured turban.."
"Oh you handsome man in
an almond coloured turban.."
"You have stolen my heart, my love."
"You have stolen my heart, my love."
"When she looked at
me with her brown eyes.."
"She lost herself completely."
"Atlhough she is single
like all her friends.."
"She has now started feeling
that she is not like them"
"Why do I feel so restless.."
"Why do I feel so restless.."
"She questions unnecessarily."
"She's so in love with this Jatt.."
"She has started preparing
for our wedding."
"She's so in love with this Jatt.."
"She has started preparing
for our wedding."
Idiot!
All the photos are out of focus!
Now you'll get a tight
slap from "nonsense" mummy.
Yes, take it in there.
Go right inside.
Very good.
- Balli!
- Yes?
- Come and help.
- Okay.
Grab one each. Come on.
Stop here.
What's wrong, mom?
We are ruined, son.
What do we do now?
They will force you to get married.
It's okay,
one should face problems head-on.
Warriors don't give up.
They try to find a solution.
You know your son has a Japanese brain.
- I'll be right back.
- Be careful.
Get it out from here.
Mom, Kylie says she
wants to go the parlour!
She wants to go the parlour!
Do you see my shoes?
I have to go with mother
to get her medicines.
He has brought his doll out again?
I wonder what new problem
will he will create!
Oh God, please help be
get rid of the kitchen duty!
What have I done wrong
to face such demons?
Come on, you help him over here.
What?
Why, can't you clean your heels at home?
Like you are Madhuri Dixit.
It's your husband's wedding. Come on,
make preparations for the Jaggo ritual.
Go.
There.
I have always found
a solution for my brave son.
Now let's see how he'll pee on you.
Look at how happy he is.
Go.
- Happy?
- Hmm.
Why are you so sad?
This is good for you.
You like him.
Gagan!
Coming!
But he doesn't like me.
- Here eat it.
- I don't want to.
- Come on, eat it.
- I don't want to.
It's your uncle's wedding sweets, have it.
Here brother, Jinda's clothes match yours.
He will be your best man.
- Really?
- Yes.
Why?
What have you done for me anyway?
That chicken will be my best man.
He sacrificed his family for me.
Put Jinder down.
Who will carry such a burden?
He wants to be my best man.
Aunt, why do you look so sad?
Don't worry, we'll have an extra
marital affair after I get married.
What's that?
You know like people
fool around after marriage?
Go to hell!
You don't have any shame!
- Jalandhar!
- Congratulations, boss. I am so happy.
- You reminded me of something.
- What?
- Come with me, it's important.
- Let's go.
Priest!
What are you doing? Sleeping?
Look over here,
stars have started favouring me.
Look at him staring at me!
He claimed that I'll never get married.
I'm getting married tomorrow, Mr.
Fortune-teller.
Look how the policemen are follow me.
SP's getting his niece married to me.
It's a big deal.
I just need to give a signal
and he'll be here in no time.
Hello, priest.
Damn you!
His prediction came wrong
and yet you are touching his feet.
- Listen to me, boss.
- Listen to what?
It's because of people like
you that their business is flourishing.
- At least listen to me.
- You should take your ten bucks back.
Get up. Today you should
touch Jalandhar's feet.
- No, boss.
- Forgive me, priest.
- Can I have that baton, sir?
- Wait boss, first hear me out.
That lanky inspector said that
SP's niece ran away with someone.
You aren't going to get married.
Priest was right.
What do you mean by she ran away?
It means,
like I said, you cannot get married.
You are not destined to.
Why are you trying
to fight with your destiny?
Unnecessarily woke me up as well.
Lock the gate on your way out.
Otherwise dogs and cats just walk in.
Enough.
- Jalandhar!
- Yes?
Look at my in-laws standards.
Their daughter ran away and
they are enjoying a cup of coffee.
Are you at CCD/a cafe?
So "nonsense" mummy,
you have stationed police in my house..
..to make sure that I don't run away.
Couldn't you have kept
an eye on your daughter as well?
Even the most families know
that girls who are having an affair..
..run away at least
two days before the wedding.
Absolutely right.
Good observation.
They are stupid.
I am with you, young man.
So should the young man marry the old man?
What do I do with your "I am with you?"
Look, his pride has finally woken up.
Brother, she has ruined them.
Now you cannot correct
them even by using your spit.
- Did anyone try calling her?
- Well, son..
Actually son, we don't want
to take our family matter to the police.
After all our dignity is at stake.
What dignity are you left with
now that your daughter has run away?
Excuse me, she has left a note.
She says we shouldn't force
you if you don't want to marry her.
I.. if I didn't want to marry her..
..I wouldn't have been the reason behind
her previous engagement being called off!
What are you saying?
You got it called off?
There you go!
Oh, my God!
I can't believe it.
I'll have to them.
I'll talk to them.
Sure, you can gather two sons-in-law..
..even thought you don't
have a single daughter here.
Okay!
I thought she ran away with someone.
But she left on her own.
Where is the one who's always with her?
- Hey you.. come here.
- Yes?
Call her up.
Tell her that royal wedding..
they want an urgent meeting.
I'm going to Shimla. Give them my number.
SHO sir, let's go to Shimla.
I'll teach her a lesson.
Jalandhar,
don't let my family find out about this.
- Let's go, guys.
- We respect sir.
We are going to get his respect back.
Get in, brothers.
Come on, hurry up.
"You should dance like a wild flame!"
"You should dance like a wild flame!"
Jalandhar, where is Chadta?
- He's at the barber shop.
- What is he doing there at this hour?
Don't talk, let's dance.
"You should dance like a wild flame!"
Yes, go ahead.
Vanjhli mother this side.
Yes, "nonsense" mummy?
You should directly
come home with Vanjhli.
I'll decide who will
Vanjhli get married to.
But "tight slap" mummy, this is wrong.
He's sleeping peacefully
while I am barking on the streets.
Shut your mouth.
Just do as I say.
No.. people don't value
a good deed these days.
Fine then, along with Vanjhli
I'll also find a Gurudwara on the way.
I'll get married to her and visit
in the morning to seek your blessing.
Holy shit!
I'll ask Kaku to call the inspector up..
..and ask him to take
the jeep to the police station.
What? You want me to
take inspector's phone?
Fine, I'll do that.
Give me your phone.
Yes, I've taken it.
I should throw it out?
Fine, I'll throw it out.
It's not a big deal.
- What have you done?
- I threw it.
Yes, yes, okay.
Kaku!
SP ordered it. You should respect him.
Drive faster.
Faster.
"The groom's father should
now rock the dance floor!"
Who is it now?
Yes, Jalandhar?
Boss, have you made it?
Now do you want me to make Taj Mahal?
Here I am barking on the streets
and you cannot even dance a little?
Your parents' will soon be out
of grease in the knees because of dancing.
Quickly find her.
You should play the song,
"He owns a Bullet to make some noise."
Everyone likes that song.
Yes, play that one, brother.
Come on, drive faster.
"The one who dances is donkey."
- Sir, please talk to sir.
- Okay.
- Hello?
- This is too much.
You want me to throw this phone as well?
Okay.
Don't worry, I'll throw it. Here you go.
He asked me to throw it.
Let's keep going, drive on.
Nonsense!
Inspector how to you catch the thieves?
Use some of your
intelligence here as well.
We cannot keep chasing like this.
If we manage to find the
original one then well and good..
..otherwise we pick up someone else.
So according to you I should
just pick up someone else and get married?
You are great!
Drive faster!
They just don't stop calling!
Yes, "tight slap" mummy?
Why isn't the inspector
answering his phone?
Ask him to answer his phone.
He cannot do that anymore.
Now someone who got
fortunate will answer it.
Yes, yes. Okay, bye.
Hello?
He disconnected it again.
I'll kill him by keep
giving him tight slaps.
Drive faster.
- Hello?
- Hello?
- Where are you?
- On the road.
Quickly go the police station.
Come on darling, if you want
to meet then let's meet somewhere better.
This is too much.
Love you much.
You sometimes get to
cut the cake and have it too.
Thank you, God.
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Stop the car!
Go back, go back, go back.
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Drive on..
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Go back!
Go, go, go!
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Stop the car!
Hello?
Boss, it's four o'clock.
They are preparing to bathe you.
We've danced so much that
everyone's feet are hurting.
I'll have too many feet to massage, boss.
I found her.
Stop worrying now.
You can proceed with
the guests from there.
I'll have a bath at the Dhabba.
"We should dance to
celebrate the occasion!"
Stop, stop, stop..
Listen everyone.
I need to share some important news.
Congratulations, uncle.
We found your daughter-in-law.
She ran away last night.
Thank you, God!
"The snake slithers
through the green grass.."
You bloody scoundrel! How dare you!
Hit him till he goes bald! How dare he!
I seek your blessings, elderly.
- What are you doing here?
- What am I doing here?
Yeah, right.
Well, they serve delicious 'Paneer
Do Pyaaza' (cottage cheese with onions.)
I came here to have supper.
Look, I am not a rag
that can be thrown anywhere.
If the frog doesn't need
the blanket then so be it.
Go and have fun.
Who said that the frog
doesn't need the blanket?
We are in the middle winter here,
the frog is shivering out here.
Oh really?
But why should I get beaten
up 25 times in five days by you?
What do I need to?
Come on, I cannot even beat up a bread.
Mother does it for me.
I am just kidding, I won't beat you up.
If I could.. then wouldn't you be lying
flat like the Bhatura that you're having?
You got my engagement called
off on purpose, didn't you?
Why?
He was a very narrow minded person.
Great!
And what about you?
You aren't narrow-minded?
No, I am not narrow-minded.
I am quite open-minded.
You can hug him if you want to.
I won't say anything.
Be sure, I'll indeed hug him.
- I say waste no time.
- Really?
No, it's okay.
You can hug me.
It's okay. Get rid of the suspicion.
Leave before I get rid of you!
He's not a good person.
Tell me the truth.
Why did you get it called off?
I want us to share a towel..
Share a toothbrush.
There shouldn't be anything
that's only yours or mine.
What's mine is yours
and what's your is mine.
You should scold me
over something every day.
I'll also love "nonsense" mummy,
only for you.
Get us that 'Paneer Do Pyaaza'
(cottage cheese with onions.)
Brother?
Hello.
Where did he come from?
Yeah, bro?
What a co-incidence!
Yes, bro?
How are you?
I'm good.
I can never thank you enough.
She is having fun at the Dhabba.
She's not at all worried about
the engagement being called off.
Yes.
She's such a funny girl.
Right! I had told you.
- Yes.
- Exactly.
You should give me my money back.
What money?
The photo shoot didn't take place.
Oh yes. For that.
I don't have my purse on me.
You can take it back tomorrow.
- Fine, then give me this.
- What?
This.. Well, I am..
Okay, fine.
I don't like this more than my brother.
It looks good on you.
Thank you.
- You should leave now.
- Okay.
Get three stuffed potatoes Parathas.
Yes!
Yay!
Where are all the beautiful dresses?
Where's the parlour?
Where are the maids?
I cannot spend another
day with such a liar.
I'm going to my maternal home.
And for what will you to
your maternal home, to get eggs?
"Nonsense" mummy too stays with us.
Son, she has been very
stubborn from the start.
I can understand what
you're going through.
Vanjhli, stop it.
Otherwise, I'll give you a tight slap.
You are so sweet, "nonsense" mummy.
Dear, he loves to get beaten
up that why he keeps blabbering.
He got a chance to get married
and yet he doesn't treasure his wife.
You'll face my shoes if
you say anything to this girl!
Daddy, there is no use of talking to him.
If you throw a stone into the muck,
your face is bound to get dirty.
Stay put, Ms. Clean!
You keep feeding your in-laws,
look how they have ballooned up.
And my in-laws,
you keep starving them, you wretch!
Are you happy that you married me?
- Very happy.
- You?
Super happy.
See, we are very happy
even after getting married.
But be it arranged, loved, done by
eloping, by threatening or by convincing..
We don't support any kind of marriages.
So please, do it at your own risk.
Brother, I ended up
making a mistake this time.
In the next life, I'd say that
the ones who get married are dogs.
- Chadta!
- Coming!
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"They way people act
sweet and then cheat."
"The way people refuse
to recognise you on the street."
"You should seek experience from us,
my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"Some break-ups ruin lives,
while some work out for the best."
"Some say their life was made,
some end up dead."
"You'll always earn a bad name in love.."
"You should sometimes
mingle around with.."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"It is an open bar.."
"He's celebrating.."
"It is an open bar.."
"He's celebrating his break-up."
"Pockets get empty,
earnings get depleted."
"The poor soul gets taunted,
while you get congratulated."
"Like an expert,
face sorrows with a smile, my love."
"You should sometimes
mingle around with.."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes mingle
around with heartbroken lovers, my love."
"You should sometimes
mingle around with.."