She (1982) Movie Script
SHE
YEAR 23
After the Cancellation
- you sure we can do it?
-maybe
- No one's ever come back
- that's business
- you wanna go back?
- if you do.
Let's go
Don't you even care about your sister?
- Take it or leave it
- that's all I have
- that's my last price
- is it?
Your money's no good
Soap! Shampoo!
on the other side
- let's run for it!
Let's get out of here!
Hey, keep away
Stop!
Stop!
Hey, stop!
Move!
Hmm, how much is this?
Whatever ya got stranger.
Come on in.
This is a nice place.
right?
Well have a seat
- you um... you must be very hungry
-damn right
Very hungry
- Where are you from?
- the other side.
Really?
- Great uh, really good
-good
- you're a good cook
Thank you
And you, you don't like the food?
What?
It's good...very good
- Who's the law around here?
- why?
We ran into a problem on our way here
Really? Our law is SHE, the goddess
Who's your God?
Our God? We don't have a God.
We do business.
What is it that you sell?
What's wrong?
Won't do you any good
Let me loose.
I can't, you're not trained yet.
Trained?
Where's Tom?
-Sold.
- Sold?!
Get this one out.
- Hey listen, I really am sorry...
- speak only when spoken to!
Look I really am sorry.
- We were attacked, ok?
My sister was kidnapped
-have him walk the path tomorrow.
No!
Let him cross alone.
Ah, so you're up.
- Who are you?
- Your fairy godmother.
So you survived the path of blood.
You'll probably be seeking revenge now.
I've got to find my sister.
Sister? SHE would never harm a woman.
It wasn't SHE, they were men.
Not even nukes.
- Their leader was all dressed in black
- you must mean the Norks,
well they're awful too
But if they've got your sister,
well you might as well forget about her
Why?
Because you'll never reach Nork valley.
Even if you do, you'll never come out alive.
You'll encounter there the ultimate horror.
- Do you know the way to Nork valley
- No actually, I'm afraid I don't
I know some medicine, a little physics,
a smattering of philosophy.
Nothing useful.
- Who would know the way?
- Ah. I don't.
Uh... SHE, SHE the goddess,
only she knows the way.
- Guess I'll just sit here...
- Tom! I thought you were dead!
Hardly.
Come on, keys are on the table
cut me loose!
You look kind of cute like that
You cut the jokes, cut me loose, come on.
Let's go.
Hey! What do you think you're doing?
All right. Nice shot!
You ok?
- I wish I could come with you.
- No you don't.
- If I cross, walk the path.
-No way you'll cross!
You are pure goddess, in body and soul.
You may enter.
You have passed through
the cycle again goddess.
But the prophecy still stands.
A man will come to claim your heart
For him you will break your vows.
Through him you will be destroyed.
You are whole again.
Shandra!
Guards!!
- Which way?
-Which way?
- Beats me.
- I said which way!?
Look! I gotta know which way to go!
Come on.
You are beautiful.
What's wrong?
Too skinny.
I like them with more meat on them.
T-t-tom!
- Long time no see goddess.
- Cut me loose Kram.
Why? What did you ever do for us?
Take them down.
Her too.
- What's the big idea Kram?
- now you'll certainly know what it's
like living in a tomb my goddess
Turn me loose Kram I was
counting on your help.
That wasn't very smart of you
was it goddess?
"Never trust a mutant".
That's your motto isn't it?
- Look, we're neighbors.
- Sure, sure.
When the sand runs out of here...
I'll send you back to your castle.
You two will die a horribly
painful death in their hands,
they are experts on pain.
Cute, real cute.
I'll kill you Kram!
This is no good.
What are you doing?
Oh, Shit!
Are you ok?
- I brought you some clothes.
- Good.
Uh, no hard feelings eh?
- Shut up nuke!
- Be careful of my arm,
they tend to fall off
What do you want me to do with him?
Turn him loose.
Get in there!
I told you to watch the arm.
Bring me those two men.
- Do you wanna kill them here?
Don't you want a public execution?
- Just get them.
Nork valley is that way,
but you'll never make it there alive.
- Untie them.
- What?
Now!
Let's get out of here!
- Why?
- I'm curious, you go back with the guard.
- No way, I'm coming with you.
- Suit yourself.
Uh! Dammit!
What's the hurry?
Had I the heavens' embroidered cloth.
Enwrought with golden and silver light
The blue and the dim
and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your
feet: But I, being poor,
have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under
your feet; Tread softly because
you tread on my dreams.
What's this place, a funny farm?
Friends. We have some visitors.
Welcome strangers.
This is a delightful surprise.
We need some directions.
Oh, come come, you can't be
leaving us already, can you?
How do we get to Nork valley?
We insist you stay at least
one night with us.
- We serve wonderful food, Don't we?
- We sure do.
This is a wonderful garb,
what is it made of?
- Ok, we'll spend the night.
- Wonderful!
Of course you'll have to get changed
for dinner we do like to dress
formally after dark.
Whoa!
- This place is wonderful.
- Civilized.
This is what the world used to be like,
before the isolation.
My parents told me all about it
in great detail before they died.
Ah...the old world.
This one is fine with me,
this place is great.
Help yourself.
What is this?
- Do you like to dance?
- No I don't think so.
It's a wonderful old world custom,
dance, you should try it. More meat!
No!
What's wrong?
Your friend seems slightly
over-enthusiastic.
My friend's an asshole.
Get it off!
- Are you hurt?
- I'm ok.
What was that?
- Do you mind keeping some distance?
- You want me to sit on the horse's ass?
- You can walk for all I care.
- What is this place?
- I don't know. I never travelled this far
- Must be terribly uncomfortable.
- Are you scared?
- Not with you around to protect me.
Sieze them!
Let's get out of here!
Enough!
There will be no violence in the
hall of Godan, the one and only man-god.
Bow!
- Bow to Godan!
- Forget it, I bow to no one.
- This is sacriliege girl, cross the flesh
- I don't care, I will not bow.
- Kill them!
- Stop!
Who are you?
I am SHE, goddess of the Yurick.
You are nothing, goddess of nothing.
How dare you!
Let me down!
You! Put me down! Put me down!
Let me go!
Let me go!
Will you cut it out?
Let me go!
Put me down, let me down now!
- Are you her followers?
- Oh no. No no. We hardly even know her.
I mean we just got picked up.
They gave us a ride
Do you believe in the one God?
The only God Godan?
Yeah, sure. Listen we're pilgrims, right?
We came from afar to pay homage
to the great god Godan. Right?
Right?
- Right?
- Yeah, sure.
Good, put them up for the night
and send them away tomorrow
with my gospel.
Those two...
I'd like to introduce you to pain.
Nothing teaches you about
mortal limitations like pain
Blessed be the man who knows his
element, blessed be the man
who knows his master
- You stink, traitors!
- Yeah, sure, have fun.
- No! Don't burn her, burn me instead!
- Don't worry child, your turn will come.
Scream mortal, you're weak.
Feel the pain.
Eva.
She is a unique mortal.
Bring her to my chambers.
I wish to study her spirit
- I'm not sure that's a very good idea.
- Are you questioning me?
- No.
- Are you doubting me?
-No.
- Then do it now.
Untie her.
Eat.
Excuse me. Can I have that apple?
Hey, what...?
Imposters!
- Hey, where's SHE?
- They took her to Godan's chambers.
You ok?
You look taller, or longer or something.
- Where's Godan's room?
- No idea.
I'll take you to Godan's. I will.
- Godan asked for the
second girl as well.
- I wasn't told about it.
Well I was! Open the door.
- It's locked.
- Step back.
Don't take another step or
I'll break her arm.
I wouldn't do that.
Guards! Guards!
Eva you were right.
They must be crossed immediately.
- What about her?
- She is still useful.
She will serve well as we teach her
people a lesson in monotheism.
Your people will be mine goddess.
I get your point.
- Get rid of these three.
- What about her?
I said three.
I...am your God!
- We believed in you,
but you betrayed us!
- I...am Godan.
- Man...God.
- You're a man! And you're dying!
I have mastered your God, accept me!
Now!
Suckers!
Don't you think we've gone far
enough? All they have to do is go
through the forest.
No one ever walked out
of this forest alive.
- Then why are we here?
- Because that's the way it has to be.
- You're not making any sense.
- Shanda, this has nothing
to do with sense.
You need this?
Not from you I don't!
- What's wrong?
- I don't know.
But something is.
You go on ahead.
Yeah, I know what you mean.
Hey, I...
Tom! I got it!
I got it!
Tom!...Tom!
- Who are you? Who is your God?
- Are you male or female?
- That we can find out in a second.
- Ease up.
Run! Run!
Come on!
Oh. Thank you my dear Rudolph.
Oh he will make a splendid
addition to our collection.
Put him over there.
You may go to sleep now Rudolph.
Our friends aren't going anywhere.
Where's Tom?
What have you done with Tom?
Unless one of the three girls'
name is Tom, we have no Tom here.
You'll survive.
What do you want with us fat man?
You are a superior specimen.
I might try some breeding
experiments with you.
I'm glad you're reasonable.
- If you let me go, I'll reward you.
- There's nothing I really
need darling girl
There is something you
could use Rabel.
You know my name. I'm flattered.
What is it that I need?
- The Yurick crystal.
- You can't! You're not allowed...
- What do you say?
- The Yurick crystal.
Mmm, only two of it's kind.
One of them is owned by Aratten,
god of the Norks. And the
other belongs to...
Me!
- I can send her to get it.
- It's an interesting proposal.
Very well!
Rudolph!
Don't get any funny ideas or
your goddess will cross immediately.
What are you doing?
He's waking up!
It's going up in flames!
Let me out! Let me out!
Help!
How do we get out of here?
How do we get out?
Let me open it.
Oh you think this is bad, eh?
You think this is bad?
You should have seen the other race
relation. And it's a Xenon push into
the first pennant drive of the season
On the opening lineup, it's Xenon on
first, on second Xenon and
of course on third Xenon
And let's not forget last
year's season favorite.
Xenon.
Where do you think you're
going there boy?.
Say, that's a mighty big weapon for a
boy your size. You know I just
love a boy with a big weapon.
Who does your hair?
I must insist, may I see
your passport please?
Are you carrying any fruits or
vegetables? Any agricultural products?
Oh, this is highly irregular!
Where do you think you're
going there young boy?
Come on put 'em up, put 'em up.
Come on, what you think you're tough?
Think you're a tough guy? Aww,
come on. You've got to be kidding.
You can't come on.
And you will not cross the bridge!
Because you were not ordered to
cross the bridge. Is that very clear?
Rise and shine.
Where's all your evidence?
You dirty rat! I'll get you for that,
see? You killed my brother.
It promises to be quite a
game this afternoon.
Don't be in such a hurry.
You gonna cut out on us?
That's a joke son, I said that's a joke.
Tom!
Tom!
Green Acres is the place to be.
Farm living is the life for me.
Land spreading out so far and wide.
You can keep Manhatten just give
me that countryside.
New York is where I'd rather stay.
I get allergic smelling hay.
I just adore a penthouse view
Darling, I love you,
but give me Park Avenue.
The chores!
The stores!
Fresh air!
Times square!
You are my wife. Goodbye city life.
Green Acres we are...
I'm a Yankee Doodle dandy.
A Yankee Doodle do or die.
A real life...
Have you been standing here long?
Say, are you wearing something
with that, or is that just a
flea in my eyebrow?
Don't tell me, Aquarius right?
I'm a Gemini myself. That means I'm..
Did you see anyone come through?.
Come through, come through?
A nice sexy girl like yourself
and you want to come through?
What's the matter, this one
isn't good enough for you?
You are a rogue and a ruffian sir!
Looks like he goes down right away eh?
Hey sailor, new in town?
Oh yes! Beat me! Slice me!
Show me I'm real.
Halt!
Turn yellow on me are you boy?
Turning yellow!
...this creep and you and I can go
back to my bed. You know I got
these thrilling stories
And you call yourself a soldier!
I killed more men in...
Let's go.
Steal my turn eh?
You can't get away with that see!
Don't use your sword!
I don't take a fall for anybody!
- What was that?
- A bomb.
- A what?
- A bomb!
What's a bomb?
- Is this it?
- We're close.
"Attention all Norks. Due to gas
warnings your scheduled briefing
will be held caveside"
"Attention all battle units. Hostile
elements reported on north side."
"No females sighted.
You may engage and destruct."
I'll kill the bastards for this.
Sit down!
This is the life of the Norks.
Food! Women! and War!
Nothing better on the face of
this Earth. Now you have an
opportunity to be a Nork.
Out of the twelve of you only two
will be allowed to join our ranks.
Only the two strongest, smartest,
toughest, deadliest sons
of bitches will make it.
The rest of you will cross!
You came here of your own free will.
To our monthly challenge.
This is your last chance to withdraw.
I will give you ten seconds to make
a decision.
One... Two... Three...
Four... Five... Six...
Seven... Eight... Nine...
- I wish to withdraw.
- Go ahead.
Anybody else?
Alright. Enjoy yourselves.
We are ready!
It's her!
Sit down.
Go!
Tom!
- I thought you were dead.
- Hardly!
Tom!
You have violated the Nork ritual,
goddess of the Yurick.
- You will now pay dearly for
your transgression.
- How?
At dawn my warriors will attack
your sector. By sunset your
people will be my slaves.
- The Yurick will be no more.
- Never!
Run, goddess. I spare your life
but your people are doomed.
- It is no use. The sun is up,
I cannot warn my people in time.
- What do you want to do?
I'm going to fight it out here.
You climb down to the river
they'll never follow you there.
- Cross for sure.
- I have no choice.
Come on let's get going.
- That's not very smart.
- Maybe
You go on.
Here, you take care or yourself now.
What's he going?
Come on!
Open it up!
Are you crazy?
What do you think?
- About what?
- Come on, you like her.
Yeah, I do.
- You don't have to stay.
- I know.
Norks!
Ambush!
Dismount!
Attack!
Take Aim!.. Shoot!
Smoke bombs!
What are they doing?
- What's that?
- It's smoke dummy!
Force one!
Charge!
Now!
Forward!
Force three!
What's the matter with you?
Are you afraid of three people?
Attack!
- How many have they got left?
- Another ten.
- We'll never make it!
- How many arrows we got?
- Three.
Dismount!
After them!
We'll meet next time goddess!
- Are you ok?
- Yeah.
- What happened to you?
I don't believe this.
- You take care of yourself, huh.
- I'll take care of him.
You coming?
Yeah.
Original timing by Eazin
Retimed and subtitled by Maestro
YEAR 23
After the Cancellation
- you sure we can do it?
-maybe
- No one's ever come back
- that's business
- you wanna go back?
- if you do.
Let's go
Don't you even care about your sister?
- Take it or leave it
- that's all I have
- that's my last price
- is it?
Your money's no good
Soap! Shampoo!
on the other side
- let's run for it!
Let's get out of here!
Hey, keep away
Stop!
Stop!
Hey, stop!
Move!
Hmm, how much is this?
Whatever ya got stranger.
Come on in.
This is a nice place.
right?
Well have a seat
- you um... you must be very hungry
-damn right
Very hungry
- Where are you from?
- the other side.
Really?
- Great uh, really good
-good
- you're a good cook
Thank you
And you, you don't like the food?
What?
It's good...very good
- Who's the law around here?
- why?
We ran into a problem on our way here
Really? Our law is SHE, the goddess
Who's your God?
Our God? We don't have a God.
We do business.
What is it that you sell?
What's wrong?
Won't do you any good
Let me loose.
I can't, you're not trained yet.
Trained?
Where's Tom?
-Sold.
- Sold?!
Get this one out.
- Hey listen, I really am sorry...
- speak only when spoken to!
Look I really am sorry.
- We were attacked, ok?
My sister was kidnapped
-have him walk the path tomorrow.
No!
Let him cross alone.
Ah, so you're up.
- Who are you?
- Your fairy godmother.
So you survived the path of blood.
You'll probably be seeking revenge now.
I've got to find my sister.
Sister? SHE would never harm a woman.
It wasn't SHE, they were men.
Not even nukes.
- Their leader was all dressed in black
- you must mean the Norks,
well they're awful too
But if they've got your sister,
well you might as well forget about her
Why?
Because you'll never reach Nork valley.
Even if you do, you'll never come out alive.
You'll encounter there the ultimate horror.
- Do you know the way to Nork valley
- No actually, I'm afraid I don't
I know some medicine, a little physics,
a smattering of philosophy.
Nothing useful.
- Who would know the way?
- Ah. I don't.
Uh... SHE, SHE the goddess,
only she knows the way.
- Guess I'll just sit here...
- Tom! I thought you were dead!
Hardly.
Come on, keys are on the table
cut me loose!
You look kind of cute like that
You cut the jokes, cut me loose, come on.
Let's go.
Hey! What do you think you're doing?
All right. Nice shot!
You ok?
- I wish I could come with you.
- No you don't.
- If I cross, walk the path.
-No way you'll cross!
You are pure goddess, in body and soul.
You may enter.
You have passed through
the cycle again goddess.
But the prophecy still stands.
A man will come to claim your heart
For him you will break your vows.
Through him you will be destroyed.
You are whole again.
Shandra!
Guards!!
- Which way?
-Which way?
- Beats me.
- I said which way!?
Look! I gotta know which way to go!
Come on.
You are beautiful.
What's wrong?
Too skinny.
I like them with more meat on them.
T-t-tom!
- Long time no see goddess.
- Cut me loose Kram.
Why? What did you ever do for us?
Take them down.
Her too.
- What's the big idea Kram?
- now you'll certainly know what it's
like living in a tomb my goddess
Turn me loose Kram I was
counting on your help.
That wasn't very smart of you
was it goddess?
"Never trust a mutant".
That's your motto isn't it?
- Look, we're neighbors.
- Sure, sure.
When the sand runs out of here...
I'll send you back to your castle.
You two will die a horribly
painful death in their hands,
they are experts on pain.
Cute, real cute.
I'll kill you Kram!
This is no good.
What are you doing?
Oh, Shit!
Are you ok?
- I brought you some clothes.
- Good.
Uh, no hard feelings eh?
- Shut up nuke!
- Be careful of my arm,
they tend to fall off
What do you want me to do with him?
Turn him loose.
Get in there!
I told you to watch the arm.
Bring me those two men.
- Do you wanna kill them here?
Don't you want a public execution?
- Just get them.
Nork valley is that way,
but you'll never make it there alive.
- Untie them.
- What?
Now!
Let's get out of here!
- Why?
- I'm curious, you go back with the guard.
- No way, I'm coming with you.
- Suit yourself.
Uh! Dammit!
What's the hurry?
Had I the heavens' embroidered cloth.
Enwrought with golden and silver light
The blue and the dim
and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your
feet: But I, being poor,
have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under
your feet; Tread softly because
you tread on my dreams.
What's this place, a funny farm?
Friends. We have some visitors.
Welcome strangers.
This is a delightful surprise.
We need some directions.
Oh, come come, you can't be
leaving us already, can you?
How do we get to Nork valley?
We insist you stay at least
one night with us.
- We serve wonderful food, Don't we?
- We sure do.
This is a wonderful garb,
what is it made of?
- Ok, we'll spend the night.
- Wonderful!
Of course you'll have to get changed
for dinner we do like to dress
formally after dark.
Whoa!
- This place is wonderful.
- Civilized.
This is what the world used to be like,
before the isolation.
My parents told me all about it
in great detail before they died.
Ah...the old world.
This one is fine with me,
this place is great.
Help yourself.
What is this?
- Do you like to dance?
- No I don't think so.
It's a wonderful old world custom,
dance, you should try it. More meat!
No!
What's wrong?
Your friend seems slightly
over-enthusiastic.
My friend's an asshole.
Get it off!
- Are you hurt?
- I'm ok.
What was that?
- Do you mind keeping some distance?
- You want me to sit on the horse's ass?
- You can walk for all I care.
- What is this place?
- I don't know. I never travelled this far
- Must be terribly uncomfortable.
- Are you scared?
- Not with you around to protect me.
Sieze them!
Let's get out of here!
Enough!
There will be no violence in the
hall of Godan, the one and only man-god.
Bow!
- Bow to Godan!
- Forget it, I bow to no one.
- This is sacriliege girl, cross the flesh
- I don't care, I will not bow.
- Kill them!
- Stop!
Who are you?
I am SHE, goddess of the Yurick.
You are nothing, goddess of nothing.
How dare you!
Let me down!
You! Put me down! Put me down!
Let me go!
Let me go!
Will you cut it out?
Let me go!
Put me down, let me down now!
- Are you her followers?
- Oh no. No no. We hardly even know her.
I mean we just got picked up.
They gave us a ride
Do you believe in the one God?
The only God Godan?
Yeah, sure. Listen we're pilgrims, right?
We came from afar to pay homage
to the great god Godan. Right?
Right?
- Right?
- Yeah, sure.
Good, put them up for the night
and send them away tomorrow
with my gospel.
Those two...
I'd like to introduce you to pain.
Nothing teaches you about
mortal limitations like pain
Blessed be the man who knows his
element, blessed be the man
who knows his master
- You stink, traitors!
- Yeah, sure, have fun.
- No! Don't burn her, burn me instead!
- Don't worry child, your turn will come.
Scream mortal, you're weak.
Feel the pain.
Eva.
She is a unique mortal.
Bring her to my chambers.
I wish to study her spirit
- I'm not sure that's a very good idea.
- Are you questioning me?
- No.
- Are you doubting me?
-No.
- Then do it now.
Untie her.
Eat.
Excuse me. Can I have that apple?
Hey, what...?
Imposters!
- Hey, where's SHE?
- They took her to Godan's chambers.
You ok?
You look taller, or longer or something.
- Where's Godan's room?
- No idea.
I'll take you to Godan's. I will.
- Godan asked for the
second girl as well.
- I wasn't told about it.
Well I was! Open the door.
- It's locked.
- Step back.
Don't take another step or
I'll break her arm.
I wouldn't do that.
Guards! Guards!
Eva you were right.
They must be crossed immediately.
- What about her?
- She is still useful.
She will serve well as we teach her
people a lesson in monotheism.
Your people will be mine goddess.
I get your point.
- Get rid of these three.
- What about her?
I said three.
I...am your God!
- We believed in you,
but you betrayed us!
- I...am Godan.
- Man...God.
- You're a man! And you're dying!
I have mastered your God, accept me!
Now!
Suckers!
Don't you think we've gone far
enough? All they have to do is go
through the forest.
No one ever walked out
of this forest alive.
- Then why are we here?
- Because that's the way it has to be.
- You're not making any sense.
- Shanda, this has nothing
to do with sense.
You need this?
Not from you I don't!
- What's wrong?
- I don't know.
But something is.
You go on ahead.
Yeah, I know what you mean.
Hey, I...
Tom! I got it!
I got it!
Tom!...Tom!
- Who are you? Who is your God?
- Are you male or female?
- That we can find out in a second.
- Ease up.
Run! Run!
Come on!
Oh. Thank you my dear Rudolph.
Oh he will make a splendid
addition to our collection.
Put him over there.
You may go to sleep now Rudolph.
Our friends aren't going anywhere.
Where's Tom?
What have you done with Tom?
Unless one of the three girls'
name is Tom, we have no Tom here.
You'll survive.
What do you want with us fat man?
You are a superior specimen.
I might try some breeding
experiments with you.
I'm glad you're reasonable.
- If you let me go, I'll reward you.
- There's nothing I really
need darling girl
There is something you
could use Rabel.
You know my name. I'm flattered.
What is it that I need?
- The Yurick crystal.
- You can't! You're not allowed...
- What do you say?
- The Yurick crystal.
Mmm, only two of it's kind.
One of them is owned by Aratten,
god of the Norks. And the
other belongs to...
Me!
- I can send her to get it.
- It's an interesting proposal.
Very well!
Rudolph!
Don't get any funny ideas or
your goddess will cross immediately.
What are you doing?
He's waking up!
It's going up in flames!
Let me out! Let me out!
Help!
How do we get out of here?
How do we get out?
Let me open it.
Oh you think this is bad, eh?
You think this is bad?
You should have seen the other race
relation. And it's a Xenon push into
the first pennant drive of the season
On the opening lineup, it's Xenon on
first, on second Xenon and
of course on third Xenon
And let's not forget last
year's season favorite.
Xenon.
Where do you think you're
going there boy?.
Say, that's a mighty big weapon for a
boy your size. You know I just
love a boy with a big weapon.
Who does your hair?
I must insist, may I see
your passport please?
Are you carrying any fruits or
vegetables? Any agricultural products?
Oh, this is highly irregular!
Where do you think you're
going there young boy?
Come on put 'em up, put 'em up.
Come on, what you think you're tough?
Think you're a tough guy? Aww,
come on. You've got to be kidding.
You can't come on.
And you will not cross the bridge!
Because you were not ordered to
cross the bridge. Is that very clear?
Rise and shine.
Where's all your evidence?
You dirty rat! I'll get you for that,
see? You killed my brother.
It promises to be quite a
game this afternoon.
Don't be in such a hurry.
You gonna cut out on us?
That's a joke son, I said that's a joke.
Tom!
Tom!
Green Acres is the place to be.
Farm living is the life for me.
Land spreading out so far and wide.
You can keep Manhatten just give
me that countryside.
New York is where I'd rather stay.
I get allergic smelling hay.
I just adore a penthouse view
Darling, I love you,
but give me Park Avenue.
The chores!
The stores!
Fresh air!
Times square!
You are my wife. Goodbye city life.
Green Acres we are...
I'm a Yankee Doodle dandy.
A Yankee Doodle do or die.
A real life...
Have you been standing here long?
Say, are you wearing something
with that, or is that just a
flea in my eyebrow?
Don't tell me, Aquarius right?
I'm a Gemini myself. That means I'm..
Did you see anyone come through?.
Come through, come through?
A nice sexy girl like yourself
and you want to come through?
What's the matter, this one
isn't good enough for you?
You are a rogue and a ruffian sir!
Looks like he goes down right away eh?
Hey sailor, new in town?
Oh yes! Beat me! Slice me!
Show me I'm real.
Halt!
Turn yellow on me are you boy?
Turning yellow!
...this creep and you and I can go
back to my bed. You know I got
these thrilling stories
And you call yourself a soldier!
I killed more men in...
Let's go.
Steal my turn eh?
You can't get away with that see!
Don't use your sword!
I don't take a fall for anybody!
- What was that?
- A bomb.
- A what?
- A bomb!
What's a bomb?
- Is this it?
- We're close.
"Attention all Norks. Due to gas
warnings your scheduled briefing
will be held caveside"
"Attention all battle units. Hostile
elements reported on north side."
"No females sighted.
You may engage and destruct."
I'll kill the bastards for this.
Sit down!
This is the life of the Norks.
Food! Women! and War!
Nothing better on the face of
this Earth. Now you have an
opportunity to be a Nork.
Out of the twelve of you only two
will be allowed to join our ranks.
Only the two strongest, smartest,
toughest, deadliest sons
of bitches will make it.
The rest of you will cross!
You came here of your own free will.
To our monthly challenge.
This is your last chance to withdraw.
I will give you ten seconds to make
a decision.
One... Two... Three...
Four... Five... Six...
Seven... Eight... Nine...
- I wish to withdraw.
- Go ahead.
Anybody else?
Alright. Enjoy yourselves.
We are ready!
It's her!
Sit down.
Go!
Tom!
- I thought you were dead.
- Hardly!
Tom!
You have violated the Nork ritual,
goddess of the Yurick.
- You will now pay dearly for
your transgression.
- How?
At dawn my warriors will attack
your sector. By sunset your
people will be my slaves.
- The Yurick will be no more.
- Never!
Run, goddess. I spare your life
but your people are doomed.
- It is no use. The sun is up,
I cannot warn my people in time.
- What do you want to do?
I'm going to fight it out here.
You climb down to the river
they'll never follow you there.
- Cross for sure.
- I have no choice.
Come on let's get going.
- That's not very smart.
- Maybe
You go on.
Here, you take care or yourself now.
What's he going?
Come on!
Open it up!
Are you crazy?
What do you think?
- About what?
- Come on, you like her.
Yeah, I do.
- You don't have to stay.
- I know.
Norks!
Ambush!
Dismount!
Attack!
Take Aim!.. Shoot!
Smoke bombs!
What are they doing?
- What's that?
- It's smoke dummy!
Force one!
Charge!
Now!
Forward!
Force three!
What's the matter with you?
Are you afraid of three people?
Attack!
- How many have they got left?
- Another ten.
- We'll never make it!
- How many arrows we got?
- Three.
Dismount!
After them!
We'll meet next time goddess!
- Are you ok?
- Yeah.
- What happened to you?
I don't believe this.
- You take care of yourself, huh.
- I'll take care of him.
You coming?
Yeah.
Original timing by Eazin
Retimed and subtitled by Maestro