Sister Code (2015) Movie Script

1
This is the story
of three sisters
brought together under
unfortunate circumstances
that supposed blood
was thicker than water,
but we would learn that love
is thicker than everything.
All the clothes
are originally Lexi J. designs
that can't be found
anywhere else.
They're completely
and utterly Lexi-tastic.
I made up that word.
- Focus on the sale.
- I am.
Could you excuse us
for one second, please?
- I am.
- No, you're not.
Looks like your baby sisters
are about to kill each other.
Again.
You're ruining this for me.
And you're ruining our business.
It's not a business,
it's a folding table
and a cardboard sign.
I'll be right back.
I quit!
Fine, I'll get somebody else
to make the stupid clothes.
- Fine!
- Fine!
Ugh, you get on my nerves.
Just so you know,
the whole neighborhood
can hear y'all fighting.
Now what the heck is going on?
She keeps bossing me around.
And she keeps
underselling our product.
She wants to give
those jeans away for $2,
when I know we can get four.
Girls. Girls! Girls. Girls.
I want you all
to close the mouths
and open the ears.
You're all sisters!
Foster sisters.
Yeah, got that right.
Okay, is that
what this is all about?
Just because you three aren't
related by blood,
you think you can't be
real sisters?
Well, we're not.
Definitely not.
Yeah.
So what are you saying, Sheila?
God messed up?
We didn't say
that God messed up.
Hmm. Well, let's think
about this.
God is the one who brought
you three to this house
and gave me a gift of
three beautiful,
wonderful, healthy girls
that I can call my own.
Now, what you three see
as a mistake...
I see as a miracle.
Sit down with me.
I want you to remember this.
I'll be gone one day.
And all you'll have
is each other.
So you all better
start practicing
this world-love thing,
I mean, right now.
I'm sorry.
- Me, too.
- Aw...
All right, well, before I go
back in the house,
I do have a question.
What time is it?
- What time is it?
- Eh, um...
- Uh...
- Um, what is it?
Well, I'll tell you right now.
It's 3:00...
It's 3:00?!
It's 3:00?! It's 3:00!
You know what that means?
What?
It's poem time!
- Poem time! -
- Oh, please no!
- Poem time. -Please!
- I don't want to, please.
It's the most perfect time,
because I want you
to shout it out to the world,
and I want them to know
that the James sisters
will always love one another.
Right?
Right.
And hurry up before
my stories start. Let's go.
Hop to it!
Stand up straight.
Get closer to me.
Closer, closer, closer.
Okay.
We are three sisters,
Three sisters are we,
I love each of you,
And I know you love me.
Go play.
Yes.
-Yes.
That was just one
of the many life-lessons
Mama taught us back then.
Now, at the time,
there was no way for us to know
just how right she was.
Morning, Mama.
Get your ass up.
Get up.
Damn. What time is it?
It's time for you to get
the hell up out of here.
Damn.
Actually, I was hoping
that we could have
a little... morning delight.
- Look, Dave, I...
- Doug.
Whatever.
I have a world to conquer,
places to see
and other people to do.
I don't have time to be here
messing with you.
Really?
Maybe the world can wait
for just a few more minutes.
Mmm, that's my girl.
I guess the life
of an artist never rests.
Good morning, Mama.
You look absolutely beautiful.
Ooh.
Will you marry me, Lavae?
Shit! That's boring.
Come on.
Ooh. All right.
Would you do me the honor
of being my wife?
That's corny, that's corny.
That's corny, right?
Corny, corny, okay.
I'm 'a roll with you
till the wheels fall off, Ma.
Ain't too small, right?
Nice.
Shit.
I'm 'a be all right,
right, Mama?
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, baby.
Hey.
- What's wrong?
- I'm fine, I'm...
I'm fine, I just got
a little dizzy, that's all.
- You know.
- Y-You sure?
I... I think...
I think we should go
to the doctor.
No, why would we go
to the doctor, baby?
Don't be silly.
No, I'm fine, you know?
They said my equilibrium
would be off,
so that's just what comes
with the territory.
Okay, you sure?
- I'm positive.
- Okay.
Well, did I tell you
that you're beautiful today?
- Uh-uh.
- Hmm?
I tell you you're
beautiful and stunning...?
- And hot?
- Ooh, hot.
- You got that right.
- Oh, my God, my baby's hot.
- She is sizzling.
- Mmm.
Oh, sizzling hot.
All right, Mom, wish me luck.
I'm gonna go in this meeting,
and I'm taking you with me
as usual, all right?
Gonna need you right there
by my side.
I love you.
Okay, you got this, girl.
Time check.
9:56.
All right, you guys, listen up.
Our meeting with
the Hoffman people go down
in exactly four minutes.
Now, this account has come down
to us and the Wells group,
and I will not lose this account
to Corrine Wells.
So that means I need everybody,
and I do mean everybody,
on point, understood?
- Understood.
- I can't hear you.
Understood!
Good, let's roll.
This is quite a proposal,
Miss James,
but how can we be sure
that you can handle our needs
being that you're
a... smaller firm?
We are a smaller firm.
But, Mr. Hoffman, we are mighty.
I can assure you
that anything you have,
my team and I
can take care of it.
We just need that opportunity.
Mm, well, we'll give it
every consideration.
- Gentlemen, shall...
- Consider... W-W-Wait.
Consideration?
You've worked with firms
that are half my size
in the past.
I know that for a fact.
So tell me, what is it?
It's a woman thing, isn't it?
Miss James,
I can assure you that we...
No, no, no, it-it's okay.
Um, you most likely feel like,
you know, a group of women
couldn't really get in there
and fight the fight
for you, huh?
Well, you're wrong.
I'm a fighter. I am like
Ronda Rousey in the cage,
ready to rip some chick's
head off and then smile.
I am like Gordon Gekko
talking about greed is good.
I'm not as tough as any man
you'd hire for the job,
I'm tougher.
Because I'm a woman.
I am hormonal,
I am bad to the bone,
and I do not take no
for an answer.
And that, Mr. Hoffman,
you can take to the bank.
Sheila was clearly
still all about her business.
Morning, big sis.
Good afternoon, don't you mean?
Oh, my God, girl.
That looks, um, appetizing.
I guess.
So, um, who was that fine
gentleman you had doing
the walk of shame through
our kitchen this morning?
Oh, girl, that's Dave.
Or Don.
I don't know.
He's, like, a football player.
Or is it a basketball player?
Either way, he does something
with his balls.
I can't with you. You are...
you are crazy!
So where are you going?
You look super fly, hey.
Thanks, babe.
Sheila hooked me up
with this investor.
Like, this hedge fund guy.
He's giving me money
for my lingerie line.
- Oh.
- Apparently,
brother is a billionaire
with a "B."
Oh, my God.
Is he single with an "S"?
Lavae! You know
I'm married to my career.
- I don't have time for all that.
- I wasn't talking about you.
I'm talking about hello.
I mean, if he doesn't mind
a woman with a little curve
in the midsection,
we can do some things, okay?
You're crazy. I got to go.
Wait, wait, wait.
Important meeting?
- We have to do our sister check.
- Oh, my God, I'm almost forgot.
- Yes, you did.
- Okay, ready?
- Yes.
- Teeth?
- Clear.
- Nose?
- Clean.
- Pits?
No white, no wet.
How about my weave?
Girl, you ain't got one.
Booty?
You definitely got one.
I love you, babe.
Love you.
- Good luck.
- All right.
I'll see you later.
- Kill it.
- Okay.
Whew.
Lexi?
Look, shit, where are you?
Look, you're 20 minutes late.
Duane Shakir is here,
and he's looking really pissed.
Okay, look, I'm gonna do my best
to try to keep him here.
All right, bye.
So you really mean to tell me
that not even one
of these desperate-ass Internet
fools even liked my profile?
You know, it's only been up
for a couple of days.
Actually a week.
Maybe it's your profile pic.
Yeah, it really doesn't scream
"I'm approachable."
What's wrong with that?
You know, whatever.
I can't even believe
I let you two talk me
into doing this anyway.
I'm done. Thank you.
- Uh, but, Sheila...
- But you just can't quit!
Yeah, it takes time to find love.
-Yes!
I don't have time, thank you.
Take it down.
But you need a man!
Lexi, where are you?!
I called you, like, ten times.
You're not picking up!
Okay, I'm gonna try
to keep him here.
Hurry up. Bye.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Let's get him another drink.
I've already given him five!
Give him six.
Okay.
L.A. traffic
is crazy, all right?
- I'm so sorry.
- Excuse me?
- What we meant to say was...
- What do you mean?
- That a-a healthy re...
- Say it!
A healthy relationship
would really help
to ground you at this time.
Grounded, thanks.
And it's proven that women
in relationships thrive
in the workplace and earn
more than single women over 30%!
- Yes. Yes. -Really?
- I looked it up.
- Did you look it up?
- Yes.
- Yes.
- It's-it's a Forbes article.
Yes.
Came out last year.
Yeah.
All right, well...
Okay, I guess, like, two more
weeks wouldn't hurt, right?
- Yes! See?
- Good job, Sheila-She.
And, oh, God! See?
Somebody just...
they just liked you! -
Put it up! Put it up!
You got... you got likes!
I have a like?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
Oh... oh, my.
- Let's see my liker!
- Okay.
- Let me see who likes me.
- He's cute, yeah.
- Cutie.
- Yeah, he looks...
Oh, hell no!
You know what?
Have that profile offline
by the end of lunch today,
or it's your asses.
But the first one's
always bad, come on! -But...
Do it or you're fired.
- Done.
- Absolutely.
God, this is a disaster.
If that woman
don't get some soon,
we're all in big trouble.
She's about to burst.
Oh, ChocolateThunder69.
Yeah, I'm gonna e-mail this
to myself.
I just...
I just want to make sure
that it's properly deleted.
What?
- Hey, dude is pissed!
- What?
- What? Who?
- Mr. Moneybags!
The guy you were supposed to
meet with over a half hour ago.
I thought the meeting
was at 1:00.
- No, the meeting was at 12:30.
- Oh, shit!
All right, let me get
in my Zen place.
What the hell are you doing?!
- What?
- Come on!
All right, well, think of a lie!
I'm not a good liar.
Dude, think, bro!
Okay, um...
tell him your dog had a stroke.
You really are a bad liar.
Well, I told you.
Now, come on, get in there!
Mr. Shakir, it's so good
to finally meet you.
You must be Lexi.
I am.
You know you're
26 minutes late, right?
I can explain.
Sheila told me
that you were a visionary
and a smart businesswoman.
Smart businesswomen
don't show up late.
They at least call in advance.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have another meeting.
Wait. My dog had a stroke.
So I rescued this dog.
Well, I like to think
she rescued me. -
Anyway, she doesn't have
two front paws...
so, um...
that's actually
why we named her Pawla.
You know, like P-A-W.
Actually, her full name is
Pawla Dean
because she's white
and a little chubby.
And she's racist.
Anyway...
so here I am this morning
looking up at the top
of the stairs,
and she just starts
shaking like...
And I was like, "Oh, my God,
Pawla's having a stroke!"
And then she, like,
just rolls and rolls
and rolls and rolls
down the stairs.
So she was just, like,
this little fur ball
of, like, blood and fur
and just... it was so tragic.
Like... I'm devastated.
A two-legged dog
stumbling down the stairs?
That's the story
you're going with?
Did I mention she was pregnant?
Have a nice day.
Hey, I believed you.
Thank you.
Up until the blood and the guts.
That was a little too much.
Oh, my God!
Rick, I was winging it!
- Oh, my goodness.
- Sheila's gonna kill me.
I mean, you grew up with her.
You know how she is.
I'm sure Sheila will understand.
I mean, she's cool like that.
Sheila's cool?
- Really?
- Yeah!
I mean, she was cool
when we were kids.
Hi, Sheila.
Hey, Rick.
You look, um...
you look really nice today.
Thanks, but I'm kind of busy.
Who's your friend?
Oh, um, this is Curtis.
Hi, Curtis.
'Sup!
I think I like these jeans.
- Told you she was amazing.
- How much are these?
- Four dollars!
- Two dollars!
Oh, my God, that's because
you were crushing on her!
Oh, there you go.
You didn't see
the little monster
that lurked underneath.
Besides, ever since
her and Andre broke up,
it's like she's impossible
to deal with.
I did hear about that.
So, her and Andre...
they-they're finished?
Um, why?
No reason. Um, no reason.
I'm just, you know,
I'm just catching back up,
that's all.
Okay.
Why you looking at me like that?
It just... it just seems
a little weird!
A brother can't ask
about his childhood friend
and her relationship?
Okay, Rick.
Oh, okay, I see
how you want to play me.
Pawla Dean.
They must be absolutely crazy.
Like I need a man.
Now, why would I need a man?
I don't need a man.
I don't think I need a man.
Mama, I need a man?
No? Thank you very much,
my girl.
Like I said, I don't need a man.
I have this all the way
under control.
This is Sheila.
Oh, hey, Duane!
Yeah, so how'd everything go?
Mm-hmm.
She did what?!
Could you take this up front?
- Thank you.
- Rick!
My lingerie line is so dope.
Like, it's gonna put
Lexi J. on the map for sure.
I can feel it.
So, what's the problem?
Funding, money.
All right, uh-huh.
Well, then make the deal, man!
All cash.
All right. -LEXI: Isn't that
that rapper Lil Danger?
For sure, all right.
More like
a little pain in my ass.
He's renting out the club for
his 30th birthday. -Ah, M&M me.
And he's spending
crazy money, too.
- Really?
- Ready? -Mm-hmm. Mmm.
He's spending, like,
50 G's on this party. -Mm.
Now we got to talk about
this grand entrance. -Perfect.
It's got to be amazing.
- It's the most important part.
- Mm-hmm.
Okay, the genius is happening.
- Okay.
- I'm envisioning it.
Everybody's gonna be waiting
for me, right? -Of course.
They'll be waiting,
"Where's Danger? Where is he?
He's supposed to be here
any moment." Right? -Right.
Bam! I bust through the door.
- Cloud of smoke.
- Wait, smoke?
- Hella smoke. All right?
- Okay, smoke.
Call the fire marshal. Smoke!
- But don't call him. All right.
- Well... Yeah, we're not...
- We're not gonna call him.
- So, from there,
you know, I'm 'a glide through.
- Through the crowd.
- Through the crowd.
What's up? What's up?
People start dancing.
Slow motion.
Slow... motion.
They're going nuts.
"Hey, Danger, you're here!"
Dancing. Slow motion.
- Slow.
- Boobies,
bouncing.
- Titties.
- Booties swinging.
- Bouncing.
- You know what I'm saying?
Then I'm 'a snatch a bottle
from a random chick,
pop that thing off, pour
some out for the dead homies,
then kick off
the hottest party of the year!
That's how it's gonna start!
Okay.
What do I see over there?
Follow, follow.
Is he really...?
Is he coming over here?
Oh, my God.
With red leather pants.
- Hello, hello!
- Hi.
How you doing?
What do we have here?
You are like a venti
caramel macchiato!
- What's your name, girl?
- I'm Lexi.
Ooh, Lexi, Lexi, oh, so sexy.
Make my heart break like
it's made of Plexi.
Glass. Yeah!
D-Did you get that?
- Yeah, got that.
- Write that down.
All right, y'all can blank.
Mm-hmm.
So it looks like you're throwing
quite the party.
Oh, yeah, it's about to be
off the hook.
Am I invited?
Invited, girl?
Mm-hmm.
- Bam!
- Oh.
- I just... yeah.
- Ooh, look at that.
That's you. See, all you do,
you put that on.
Mm-hmm. -And you show up,
you come see me, all right?
- Okay.
- Rawr!
- With your fine self, girl.
- Whoa, big sister incoming.
- Sh...
- Oh, what up?!
The P.R. chick!
- Okay, so I, um... hmm.
- Oh.
I must be mistaken,
because I know
you did not show up
30 minutes late to a meeting
I worked my ass off
to set up for you, Lex!
She, okay,
I know you're upset. Damn!
What is this stupid-ass story
about some legless dog
named Pawla Dean?
What is this shit?!
These chandeliers are amazing.
Can we please talk about this
in private later?
No! No, Lex. We can't
talk about it in private,
- because you know what?
- I'm done, okay? -What?
And I don't care who hears me.
I am done with you.
I'm done giving you a pass
because you think
you're an artist.
I'm done with watching you
fuck up your life
- and mine, too, for that matter!
- She, okay!
- I'm done.
- Fine! I'm gonna change, okay?
I promise!
- So you're gonna change?
- Yes!
And you have promises.
You can keep promises?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
No. No, you don't.
I don't believe you.
You're on your own.
Figure it out, Lex.
She, damn!
Uh, I know right now is probably
not the best time, but, um,
you're still
coming on Saturday, right?
'Cause if not, I'm 'a need that,
uh, dipped laminate back.
Take your time.
Just get back to me.
Brunch is at 11:00.
No, oh, no problem.
Thank you. Bye.
- Hey.
- Hey.
You okay?
Yeah. Uh, I think so.
All right, just give me
your real opinion.
On a scale from one to ten,
how bad was I, really, on Lexi?
I would probably go with,
uh, 7.5.
Or ten. Or t... either one.
Come on, Sheila, you know...
- Lexi has to find a way.
- Mm-hmm.
And your job is to let her
do that but still support her.
So what, you went
to Northern California
- and got smart or something?
- Brainiac.
Whatever.
Well, you know what?
It's... really nice
to have you back.
It's good to be back.
Hey, yo, you got a delivery
in the back, dawg.
- Okay, cool.
- I'm sorry to interrupt.
Oh, no, you didn't interrupt.
He works here?
Yeah.
I'm gonna go get that delivery.
Okay.
Lavae, I'm gonna order
a stronger dose of Naproxen
for that joint pain,
but you got to let me know
if it gets any worse, okay?
Okay.
And the blood work?
Everything was... normal?
Well, your kidney panels
are a little out of whack.
What does that mean?
I mean, it's not gonna
affect the baby, is it?
Lavae, the baby is fine.
It's the mom I'm worried about.
Now, you need to get
some bed rest.
I want you to take
this prescription
and give it to one of
your sisters to take down.
Uh... yeah.
That might be hard.
Okay.
Vae, you haven't told
your sisters yet?
It's not that
I haven't told them,
I just haven't found
the right time,
you know, to tell them.
And what about your boyfriend?
Does he know?
Yeah, see, that's complicated.
It's three words, Lavae:
"I have lupus."
It's not that complicated.
And it's also nothing
to be ashamed of.
Now, your sisters
are very strong women.
I'm sure they can handle this.
Hello, ma'am, I'm Lavae James,
and these are my two sisters.
We'd like to apologize
for any confusion.
Business can take
its toll on folks.
But now we'd like to sell you
the jeans for three dollars,
and we're willing to throw in
an exclusive
Lexi J. design bag for free.
- How does that sound?
- That sounds wonderful.
Oh!
Hello?
She yelled at me, Vae,
in front of everybody.
Scolded me like I was
her damn kid or something.
Wait. Lex, hold on, okay?
Hold on one second.
Ooh.
Hello?
Girl, you are not gonna believe
what your lazy-ass,
good for nothing,
entitled little sister
did today.
Sheila, wait. My other line.
H-Hold on, She, hold on.
Oh, geez. Lex?
She can't just yell at me
whenever she wants, okay?
- Yeah, I'm so tired of her shit.
- We're not kids anymore.
She really needs
to get her act together.
- She needs to show me respect.
- I'm over making excuses
for her crazy ass.
- Bottom line is...
- You know what? Bottom line is,
she broke sister code.
Oh.
All right, you guys,
I need a full perimeter check.
No stragglers
getting into my party.
Thank you.
I'm 'a check inside.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Sheila,
I almost forgot to tell you.
Somebody sent you
a bouquet of flowers.
They're inside with
the bartender... that cute one.
Flowers? That's weird.
I know, right?
We thought the same thing.
What I mean to say is
that we thought it was weird
that they were delivered
without a signature.
We don't... we don't know
who sent them.
Someone's got a secret admirer!
Oh, well... it's fine.
I'll-I'll check into it.
- Thank you.
- Yes, check into it.
- It could be from anyone.
- Anybody.
- Hey, Rick.
- Hey.
Um, did somebody
leave flowers for me?
As a matter of fact,
somebody did.
- They did?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's...
Mm.
- Mm.
- Oh, my goodness.
They're absolutely beautiful.
- Absolutely.
- Someone's got a crush.
And there's a card.
You're all like, "It's a card."
- Right.
- Yes.
"These flowers are no match
for your elegance
or timeless beauty."
Oh.
That's so sweet.
Um, Sheila?
Hmm?
Something I've really
been wanting to tell you.
And... it's kind of...
Do you really not know
who sent these?
Well, whoever it was must really
feel a certain kind of way
and they think this is
the perfect time to tell you
that, um,
for the longest... time...
Look, I know
who sent the flowers.
- I know who sent the flowers.
- No! No, no, no, no.
- No, no, no, no.
- No, no, I know and he is fine.
- Sheila, Sheila...
- Look, look, I need...
Look, look, look, look.
Focus, okay?
My sisters aren't here,
I need a sister check,
you're gonna work. Hold this.
Hold it! Teeth?
Clean.
- Nose?
- Good.
- You sure?
- Yeah.
Booty?
- Straight.
- Thank you.
And don't drop my flowers, Rick.
Thank you very much.
Wish me luck, all right?
See you later.
God, how can something
that small
tap-dance on my nerves so bad?
Who you talking about, Danger?
Okay, so, look,
I've been fantasizing all night
about ripping that
little nasty medallion
off his neck
and choking his ass with it.
How about, actually,
I melt that shit down
and make us a necklace?
Oh, my God.
He's not as bad as you think.
Oh, no, you're right.
He's worse.
Okay, look, Lex,
let's just get it out.
About the other day.
Okay, look, I know
I shouldn't have lied to Duane.
-Yeah.
You can't scream at me
in front of people like that.
It's not cool.
- All right.
- You embarrassed me.
Okay, fine, I'll give you that.
- I'm sorry, okay?
- Thank you.
But, seriously, if you want
people to take you seriously
in life, then you got to get
your shit together.
And all the people
you know, Lex,
start using that shit
to your advantage.
Ladies, ladies.
Can I interest you
in anything else?
Yes.
A very tall, thick
glass of chocolate milk.
Straight up.
I'll be serving that up
later tonight.
- Oh.
- If you're still around.
All right, Sheila.
Damn.
Uh, I'll be around.
I guess we figured out
who sent you those flowers.
Okay, like I was telling you,
when opportunities
present themself, as they do...
Mm-hmm. -... you might want
to jump on that shit, literally.
You're absolutely right.
I'll be right back.
So, you and Sheila...
really hitting it off?
Oh, you know,
it's a little something.
It's a'ight, you know.
A little thang.
Yeah, she thinks you're the one
that sent the flowers, right?
That's right.
And you're not gonna
tell her the truth?
Now, why would I do
some dumb shit like that?
Who sends flowers to a girl
and doesn't tell her?
So, while he's simpin',
I'm 'a keep on pimpin',
you feel me?
All right, ladies, you know
what I'm gonna need y'all to do?
Daddy's got a little company,
so I'm gonna need y'all
to just go ahead and disperse.
Disperse.
This is our night.
I know, I know I said
it was our night, you know,
but I'm a rapper; we say stuff
we don't mean, okay?
So what I need you to do, Snowflake,
is just go ahead
and scoot, scoot.
J-Just scoot.
There you go.
I'm charging you
the whole night.
What...
You gonna take my M&Ms, too?
That's messed up, Tiffany.
That's messed up.
Fine. Wh...
Oh, y'all didn't hear me.
Come on! Let's go.
It's all good.
More party that way.
Yo, I need the player hat,
player hat.
It's my A1.
Mm... hmm.
- Hey.
- Hey.
What's up, girl?
- Ooh... it's perfect.
- Ooh.
Yeah.
There go my queen.
Oh.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
So, why don't you tell me
a little bit about yourself?
- Okay.
- Or better yet,
why don't you tell me
what you know about me?
Well, I know that
you're a Grammy-nominated,
- double-platinum musical genius.
- Yeah.
And you're going on
a 48-city tour, right?
Oh, somebody Googled me.
Mm-hmm.
I like it, I like it.
But, yo, you forgot
one thing though, you know.
You forgot about
the film I'm doing
with, uh, with the short dude.
He's shorter than me though.
What's his name? Uh...
Oh! Kevin Hart.
- That one.
- Yes.
- Kevin Hart.
- Yes.
And you start filming
this fall, right?
True indeed.
I like you.
Beauty and brains.
I know everything.
You hear that?
Guess who know me?
She know about me.
Yeah. Well, you know.
It's your birthday.
All right, all right.
Am I seeing things,
or is your baby sister
actually talking
to that trifling troll of a man?
Oh, she is talking to him.
She nuzzlin', too.
Look at her nuzzlin'.
- Oh, that's... that's a nuzzle.
- Oh. That is a nuzzle.
We have a situation!
Corrine Wells.
I mean, really, smoke?
What is this,
a Def Leppard '90s video?
Apparently so.
God! Ugh, it's so tacky.
Don't worry about this.
I got it.
That's it. Just give it to me.
It's really like the Limelight.
I'm back in New York
in the '90s.
Where's the coke? Ca-Cola.
Oh, right.
Oh, here she comes, here she comes.
-Oh. Mm-hmm.
Corrine, how are you?
Oh, I'm so good.
Thank you for asking.
You know what?
I have to commend you, She-she.
You really did a nice job
with this little get-together.
And we really appreciate
you handling this for us.
You know, being Lil Danger's
main P.R. firm
and with our other huge clients,
sometimes we just
end up having to punt
these smaller, lesser events
to someone else,
and I'm really thankful
that it could go to somebody
who really could use the work.
Could I talk to you?
Sure.
Bring it in.
I have to tell you, sweetheart,
I'm so proud of you.
I mean, you've come
such a long way
from when you used
to work for me.
It's like, you know, when I
taught you everything you know.
It's just like,
my little wayward sister!
She's growing up,
she's sprouting her little
- bird wings!
- I know.
Now I make more than you,
so I'm better than
the master, basically.
Oh, maybe.
That's just reported income.
I kept a couple secrets,
you know.
Oh, that's cute.
I'll tell the IRS. Mm-hmm.
Oh, they're legal investments.
Oh, okay.
I'll tell them that, too.
But you know what?
It's totally fine,
considering the whole
Hoffman deal.
Excuse me?
The Hoffman deal?
What, you didn't hear?
She didn't hear!
Oh. She didn't hear.
We got the account.
We pitched them on Thursday.
Well, we closed them on Friday.
While we were planning this,
you know, "lesser event."
Well, I guess
congratulations are in order.
Thank you!
You're welcome.
Somebody's getting fired.
Um, well, everyone, please enjoy
your lovely little party,
and, ah, the pants...
they're just so great.
It's so retro.
It's like
Prince is in the building.
Bye, Cor-cor.
Excuse me!
Bye.
So, uh, what else
do you know about me? -
I know that you are
very married.
Wikipedia.
Damn it.
But, uh, y-yeah.
Unfortunately, I am nuptialized.
But, uh, I-I don't see
my wife around here.
D-Do you?
Uh, no, no.
Denise!
- Denise!
- I don't...
Hey!
I don't think...
I don't think she's here, but...
You're such a bad boy.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm bad.
I'm bad to the bone, baby.
Ooh.
Well, speaking of boning,
how about you come back
to my place?
Are you with that?
I'm... oh, I'm with that.
Really?
Uh, y-yeah.
Well...
- Hey, baby.
- Hey, baby.
Your man is here for you.
What is all of this?
It's perfect,
just the way you like me.
Aw.
Ooh!
Baby, you do not
have to do all this.
Yes, I do.
- I love you.
- I love you, too.
Mm-mm, I love you more.
I love you more.
Come here.
Love you.
Love you, too.
Mmm.
- Mm-mm, baby, baby, baby, wait.
- What?
Like, are you sure
this is okay, you know?
- This is good?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's okay.
It's okay.
I mean, the doctor said
that we could do it up to the,
uh, the third trimester.
Yeah. -And we got, like, three,
four more hours into that.
That's true. -So, 15 minutes,
that's all I need.
Okay. Okay. -About to do
some pushups, hold on.
Ooh.
One Mississippi,
two Mississippi.
Okay, that's enough Mississippi.
I'm swoll.
You know what, you got a little
more swoll on that side.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, I see it.
It is so sexy.
Mmm.
- Ooh! Ooh, ooh.
- Ooh, ooh.
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
Bad "ooh," good "ooh"?
Uh, it was a good "ooh."
It was... it was good,
it was good.
I'm fine.
I'm good. I'm great.
Baby, what's wrong?
It should be really easy
to say, right?
Mm-hmm.
It's just three little words.
So just say it.
Take me now?
Of course.
Of course I'll take you now.
Ooh!
Damn!
You living like this?
My mama made
some very good investments.
Mom's kind of giving me
the side-eye over there.
Don't worry, I'm a big girl.
Oh... oh... okay.
Ooh, it's my birthday, huh?
So I think I'm, um, ready
for that chocolate milk.
- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, are you?
- Mm-hmm.
Oh, shit, and it comes with
an eight-pack.
Convenient.
Yes.
Mmm.
You know, those flowers you got
me, they really turned me on.
- Flowers?
- Mm-hmm.
Oh, yeah, flowers.
Oh, you know, uh,
romance is my middle name.
Well, how did you even know
to get me white orchids?
Seriously, they've been
my favorite since I was a kid.
I know. I, uh...
I asked around about you.
Mm.
I told you, I'm Mr. Romance.
Yes, you are.
Why don't you get
a little comfortable?
Whoa, kind of strong, girl.
- B-But I like...
- Shut up! I mean...
Sorry. Please be quiet.
Ooh.
Dang, man, that body
is looking too right.
Mmm, thank you.
Ooh, you got some more for me?
Oh, yeah, I got a lot more.
Mmm. Ooh.
Can I see?
Are... are you talking about me
or my lingerie?
Oh, uh...
Both, baby.
Both, yeah.
Hey, you got any fishnets?
Or edible undies?
Or crotchless?
Leather? Pleather?
- I'm into all that.
- Mm-hmm.
You're a little freak,
aren't you?
Ooh, big freak, big, big.
So, um, I got a little bit
of this for you.
Ooh.
Yes.
Yes.
Ooh.
And this.
Ooh, yes.
And this.
Mm. Yes, sweet baby Jesus.
Yes.
Um...
Yeah, uh...
No disrespect, Mama,
but it's not that type of party.
All right.
Mmm.
So, now that you've seen
all of me,
I would love to see all of you.
Ooh, girl, you don't
got to ask me twice.
Baby.
Oh. Ooh.
Like I never left.
Ooh, you look like
you about to tear it up.
Ooh, I'm 'a tear it up, girl,
I'm 'a tear it up,
- down, around, around...
- Mmm, tear that shit up, baby.
- Yeah, tear it up, baby.
- Ooh, I'll tear it up.
Ooh, I'll tear it up.
Ooh, wait, wait, wait.
- You'll do me one favor?
- What's that?
Just look in
that camera for me right there?
Oh, you got... you got a camera.
You trying to get
real freaky, girl.
Um... no.
Actually, I have a reality show.
It's called
Horny Husbands of Hollywood.
And it's starring you.
Wait, wait, wait, hold up.
No, hold up, hold up.
Ain't gonna be no filming
reality shows...
Too late, boo.
Oh, you got another camera, huh?
-Mm-hmm.
Man, give me that camera,
all right?
What you gonna do?
Get yourself in more trouble
than you're already in?
Don't do it.
What do you want?
I want you to fund
my lingerie line.
I'll do all the work.
You and your wife will benefit,
and she won't know a thing.
Fine.
I'll fund your lingerie line.
I'll give you five grand,
and if I like what I see,
then I'll give you more.
Cool.
Cool. So...
I mean, can we seal this deal
with a kiss?
- Down south?
- Ugh.
Whatever.
- I'm just saying.
- Excuse me.
Everything that I need.
Well, I'm 'a need a few minutes.
And leave the bra!
Freak.
Okay, so I think
I'll take the, uh...
the mixed green salad
with the dressing on the side.
Got it.
And I think I'll have
the chicken piccata.
And to drink...
Ooh, a big old glass
of chocolate milk?
- Can I get that?
- Oh, my God.
Actually, I'll have
chocolate milk,
but you can bring mine
in a eight-pack.
I guess I'll go put
your appetizers in.
- Thank you.
- Thank you. -Thank you.
- That was funny.
- Are you serious?
I-I like this guy.
Why would you embarrass me?
'Cause it's fun.
- It is.
- Really?
Listen, you better listen
to Miss "Tear It Up."
- "Tear that shit up."
- "Tear it up."
Y'all ain't right. -She know
what she talking about.
- Oh. It's not funny?
- Y'all ain't right for that.
So you had a good time
last night.
Yeah, man, but I did not
expect her sisters
to be all up in my mix
like that, man.
All up in my shit,
you know what I'm saying?
But, look, check it out though.
It's three of them,
it's one of me,
but I heard they're not
really sisters no way.
So that could be, like,
a mnage foie?
Like, I...
So what did happen?
Yo, what didn't happen, brah?
You know what I'm saying?
In, out, front, back.
Beat it down.
But it's too many tai tais
running around, man.
Like, I cannot have mine
getting all attached.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, look, man, um...
I been knowing them
for a long time.
Since they were little.
They're good people.
And Sheila's mom
is like a saint.
Like, she raised me
like I was one of her own.
And Sheila's not a tai tai.
So don't treat her like one.
You understand what I'm saying?
Damn. It's like that?
Yeah, it's like that.
They can all get it.
So how are you and Thomas?
Oh, we're, um...
we're good, you know?
We're real good.
Everything is, um, good.
- Mm-mm.
- Just good, good, good.
- Mm-mm. No.
- Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh.
That many "goods" usually means
it's really, really bad.
What? No, no, no, no.
It's all good, trust me.
You can't lie to us
because we sense it.
We see right through you.
- Yeah.
- I'm not lying.
- I'm serious.
- Okay, did he pop the question?
Did he propose?
Let me see your hand.
- Huh? No.
- Well, okay. No.
But it has nothing
to do with him.
- It's about...
- You are pregnant, okay?
He needs to show a commitment.
- Yes.
- Uh, he has.
Sweetheart, you're beautiful,
but you're not a doormat,
and you need to stop letting him
treat you like one.
Guys, you guys are
really overreacting.
Look, let me tell you,
it is not that at all.
- You guys are totally mistaken.
- Mm-mm.
So you really are
taking it too far.
He is mistaking your kindness
for weakness, okay? -Yeah. Yeah.
How is he gonna
get you pregnant,
but not be man enough
to commit to you?
- Are you serious? No.
- Oh, you know what?
He done messed with the wrong sisters.
-I agree.
- I'm telling you.
- So do you think we should go,
Lex, have a sit-down with him?
- Oh, oh, 100 percent.
- Please don't!
Yes. And when we do,
we're gonna let him know
that under no uncertain
circumstances will he be
getting my big sister pregnant
and then skating off
like some kind of Don Juan.
Who does he think he is?
Hell has no fury
like a James woman scorned.
Enough, please.
It has nothing to do with
Thomas not proposing, okay?
It has everything to do
with me. I have...
Ladies, ladies, ladies, I got
your appetizers right here.
I'm 'a set these down
and then, you know...
Thank you.
Like, get the hell
out of here.
Why? Why are you
so mean to him?
Ugh, 'cause he's just aggravating!
He's fine as hell.
- Ugh, God!
- Really?
All the ballplayers you date?
Excuse me.
At least, I sleep with
ballplayers and athletes.
You're fucking a waiter.
But he's a waiter
with potential!
"A waiter with potential"?
So, what, you have what?
I-I, um, I have...
Girl!
- Oh, Lavae, just say it!
- Yeah.
I have crazy hormonal issues.
That's...
You know, cra...
It's just been cra...
I've been a bitch lately,
and you know it's true.
- Oh, I knew that.
- You know? And with Thomas,
you know, he tries
to come and get some,
and I'm like, "Get that
ding-a-ling away from me."
I don't want sex. -Okay, but
that's how we got here, right?
I'm burping. It's just...
Exactly. And so,
that's what it is,
but just promise me, promise me,
seriously, guys, that you're not
gonna go talk to Thomas.
- Just, I really...
- Oh, no!
Don't go busting
in our business.
Lavae, I would never.
Seriously, like,
intrude on your personal life?
Never.
I totally would
never do that to you, sis.
Okay, please,
just leave it alone and just...
- No, oh, my God!
- Mm-hmm.
Okay, well, promise me.
Promise me that you won't.
I pr... I promise.
- Promise me then.
- No.
Promise.
Promise.
Hello, Thomas.
- Oh.
- Hey, Thomas.
Hey, the James sisters.
- Mm-hmm.
- What's going on?
You tell us.
You look a little surprised
- to see us, Thomas.
- You know, for some reason,
lately my big sister's been
seeming a little...
Would you say "different"?
- Definitely different.
- Yeah, she's been different.
And I can't help
but to think it's your ass.
Oh, no, no. Me and Lavae?
- I'm telling you, we good.
- "Good." See?
- There goes that word again.
- Girl, you think they've
been rehearsing this shit?
Thomas, I'm telling you,
better not lie to me.
We know!
- We know.
- Know?
What shit are you talking about?
We're talking about,
for whatever reason,
you not seeing it fit
to marry my big sister.
We're talking about you
not knowing the lovely Lavae J.
- Is a gem.
- Mm-hmm.
A beautiful gem
with a thousand points of light.
You don't just date a gem,
Thomas, okay?
And you don't
just sleep with a gem.
I agree with you.
I mean, yeah,
I'm gonna marry a gem.
- Who is she?
- Huh?
You got some little skank
- coming up in your house?
- No!
I knew his ass was
no good from day one.
- I knew from the jump.
- The jump.
I knew from the jump, too, She.
Tell me, what's her name, huh?!
What is it? Is it like Porsche?
- Mercedes? -Or like...
- Yeah, that's a good one.
Like Maserati or something?
All the cheap girls always have
exotic car names.
Spill it, Thomas!
Look, it's not about
another woman.
Then what is it?!
It's not about that, it's...
Oh, what is it?
I'm been trying to give
Lavae this for some time.
Okay, look, Lex,
I told you from day one, the
first time I ever saw Thomas,
I knew that he was
perfect for her.
- I knew it.
- Oh, he's such a good guy.
He's such a good guy.
I mean, you guys
don't think that it's, uh,
a little simple, plain?
No, no, no. It's perfect!
- Yeah.
- I mean, I tried.
I-I just didn't have
enough money...
No, listen, okay, look.
I know my sister, right?
And now if this was Lex,
then, yeah,
definitely needs
to be bigger, right?
- Me? No question about it.
- For sure.
But Lavae...
this is perfect for her!
She would love this!
I know my sister, trust me.
- Mm-hmm.
- Thank you. -Mm-hmm.
- Okay, so anyway...
- What are you thinking?
- Now we have to do the proposal.
- I already knew where
your head was going.
I knew you were going there.
Oh, this is what I was thinking!
Yo, I'm rocking with you
till the wheels fall off.
A'ight?!
Bow!
Damn.
No, no, no.
Anyway, so listen. Thank you.
So I was thinking Parisian.
Oh, my God, that's beautiful!
Like, like something,
like, white.
Yeah, who should we get
to plan it?
Like, have you heard
of Mindy Weiss?
Okay, listen, I was
just thinking rainbow.
Hey, is Lavae coming?
Bye, Thomas!
Wait.
So tell me again.
Why did I let you drag me
out of bed on a Sunday morning?
Rick, 'cause you're
my best friend.
All right, fine,
I had nowhere else to go.
That's why I thought.
Now, why are you talking
to Danger in the first place?
I don't... It's business, okay?
Listen, he's gonna fund
my lingerie line
and, you know, just be,
like, a silent partner.
You're blackmailing him.
Pretty much.
Well, well, well.
What are we up to today,
Mr. Man?
Ha!
Gotcha!
And don't go around
telling everybody my business.
Especially Sheila.
I'll try. But you know Sheila.
She can just look at you
and make you tell your secrets.
- Mm-hmm.
- She's like a Jedi.
You're right.
Listen, just avoid eye contact
- with her altogether.
- Good point. Good point.
Hey, yo!
Um, yeah, I'm gonna be
in the office
far away from this nonsense.
The eagle has landed.
The eagle has landed.
What the hell are you wearing?
It's, like, a hundred-million
degrees outside.
What? You don't think
I know it's hot out here?
Huh? I'm incog-Negro
because I don't want
the paparazzi finding out
that I'm getting blackmailed
by some lingerie maven...
that's you!
Okay, excuse you.
"Blackmailed" is
such a harsh word.
This is business, honey.
No, this is bullshit
is what it is.
It's hot out here.
Told you.
Front, guys. Let's do it.
All sweaty-ass.
I got proof, creeping with
your little floral shirt on
with your little patterns.
With your little outfit.
I see you looking like
Punky Brewster
had sex with a mogwai.
Got to keep
an eye out for my wife.
She could pop up
around here anytime.
Oh, whatever!
Little Danger,
do you have the money or not?
You got the stuff?
I got it close by.
Do you have the money?
Yeah, I got it close by, too.
You show me the stuff,
I show you the money.
Why are you talking like that?
Scarface. This...
This is Scarface
right now, right?
- You know Tony Montana?
- I never seen that movie.
What?! What do you mean...?
Everybody black
has seen Scarface.
Right? I mean, do you...
you... you got...
a little bit of...
I don't even know if I can be
blackmailed by you anymore.
The money, Danger!
Look, look, look.
Damn.
Show me the stuff.
Show me what you got.
Okay.
Okay, you are really
the Biggie of bras.
- Mm-hmm.
- You know?
You are, like,
the Picasso of panties.
You know?
The queen... of crotchless.
What else you got in there?
Ooh, ooh, ooh!
- Did you try this on?
- Danger, give me my damn money!
I'm 'a have to keep this.
I'll probably just
take this with me.
Hold on to that.
All right, look.
I'll give you your money,
but, look, we gonna have
to change this deal.
You know what? I knew you was
gonna do this to me.
I knew you was gonna try to
play me out like that, Danger.
- I knew it!
- No, no, no!
- Why would you do that?!
- Lexi, Lexi!
I want to give you more money.
Really?
- Yeah, look.
- Okay.
Here's the initial
five G's, okay?
I'll have another 15
for you tomorrow.
We're sourcing materials
from China,
expanding your brand offerings,
decreasing delivery time
by increasing your efficiency
with the manufacturers.
We'll get some, uh, sales reps,
and we do, uh,
profit participation projections
from there.
Damn! Okay.
We do this my way,
we do it right,
I promise you, in six months,
everybody's gonna know
the name Lexi...
Lexi...
Lexi James!
Lexi James! That's what I...
I knew that.
So we got a deal?
Deal.
All right, then.
Ah.
One more thing.
Since it's my money,
- we got to use my staff, okay?
- Sure.
Including the P.R.
Corinne Wells?
That's Sheila's
number one competitor.
- I can't do that.
- I know.
But, you know, Corinne's already
on the payroll, you know?
I can't pay out twice
for the same job.
Sheila has always
been my P.R. person.
Where's that gotten you?
I come bearing gifts.
What do you have?
Must be from
your secret admirer.
That's impossible.
We already know who it is.
It's Brian.
Well, maybe you should
read the card.
There's a card?
Yes, there's a card.
Oh.
Okay, he sent a card.
Mm-hmm.
"Roses are red,
violets are blue,
You may not see me..."
"But I definitely see you." Yes!
Did you read it?
Maybe. Maybe just a little,
a little bit.
Ooh, girl!
And the plot thickens!
Looks like somebody's
got themselves
a secret secret admirer.
Ooh, I wish I had...
We have a big, big problem!
Know what, Sheila?
I have a really big opportunity,
and decisions need to be made.
Okay. More direct.
You know what? I'm going with
another P.R. firm,
and I don't care what you say,
'cause I have wings
and I need to fly.
What? This proposal was perfect.
What do you mean
the Hoffman Group is out?!
How could that even be?
I mean, I used
my Ronda Rousey speech.
You were there.
I mean, we closed the deal.
Not quite.
Business affairs says
that there are still
fine points to work out.
And in the meantime, I guess
Corrine Wells just swooped in.
Are you saying
Corrine undercut us?
Hoffman was playing
two ends against the middle,
looking for the best deal;
she gave it to him.
- What?!
- I'm sorry, Sheila.
Sheila, we need to talk.
Hi, pretty girl.
Not right now. I'm busy.
- How could she... -No, no!
- You always do that to me.
My time matters
just as much as yours.
I'm busy, all right?
Lex, I'm busy.
It's about my lingerie line.
Oh, my God, your lingerie line.
You know what?
You do whatever you want to do
with your lingerie line.
Consider me out of it.
It matters not to me.
Sheila! Please!
Got it. Got it.
What?!
Nothing.
I'm fine.
Fine.
Seriously!
Baby?
Thomas?
Baby, what are you doing?
- Hi. -Hey.
- Hey, pretty lady.
What are you doing?
I'm doing something that I
should've done a long time ago.
Lavae Marie James...
you're not only the best thing
that ever happened in my life,
baby, you are my life.
You're an amazing sister,
a devoted friend,
and by far the best person I
have ever known on this planet.
And I can't wait
to see you as a mother.
Well, you're not gonna have
to wait for long.
Would you do me the honor...
of being my wife?
Will you marry me, Lavae?
Oh...
Oh, baby.
Oh.
Well, I love you, too.
I, um...
Ooh.
Well...
I have lupus.
What?
I found out about a month
after I found out
I was pregnant.
I was having these joint pains,
and I thought it was just
part of the pregnancy.
And the doctors ran tests,
- and that was it.
- Like, really, babe?
Why didn't you tell us?
I mean, we're sisters,
we're family.
Why didn't... I mean, really?
She, I know, okay?
I know. I just...
It was really hard, you know?
And I just couldn't.
How did you...
how did you get it?
Lex, it's not something
you can contract.
You know,
it's in your immune system,
and it just causes it
to overact.
And it attacks
your healthy tissues,
and that's what it is.
But the doctors, you know,
they feel really good
about my chances, and...
as long as I keep my meds up
and I stay healthy
- and I stay on it...
- Okay, and if not?
I mean, what are we talking
about here, Vae?
Well, people have died
from lupus, yes,
but no, I'm not gonna be
one of those people.
Okay? I am going
to deliver this baby
without complications,
and I'm gonna live my life,
and I'm gonna live my life
surrounded by
each one of you, okay?
What about the pregnancy?
The baby is strong
and healthy, and...
and that's it.
We're gonna make it through.
Understood?
And I need you guys
to be strong.
Now, as corny as this may sound,
I really think
we need a group hug.
Come on. Group hug.
- Mmm.
- Mmm.
- I love you, sis.
- Mmm.
- I love you more.
- Baby, I need you...
- Oh.
- Oh.
Baby, I want to spend
the rest of my life with you.
Oh...
And that's never been as clear
as right now.
Will you marry me?
Yes, Thomas, I'll marry you.
Put it on my finger!
Oh...
Ah!
Gimme some,
gimme some, gimme some.
You ruined it.
Don't you have to go
work on your jump shot
to get your ass
out of the second round?
Oh, I got your second round.
Well, I did wake up
a little early.
I guess I have
a little bit of time, Doug.
Darrell.
You gonna buy
some of my panties?
I know I'm gonna buy
some of my panties.
I'm gonna wear my panties
every day.
Danger
Is payin' for my panties.
Excuse you?
Excuse you.
Can I help you?
Oh, I hope you don't mind
if I join your little meeting.
What?
Negro, get your little ass
over here!
It's your fault anyway.
So this is her, huh?
I should've known.
You always go for
the light skins, don't you?!
With your little
predictable punk-ass.
Hey, I'm...
This is my lovely wife, uh...
Jamaya, Negro!
I... that's... I know it.
Hi, I'm Lexi.
Listen, Crew Cut,
whatever it is that you
and this Ewok standing
behind me got going on,
we gonna put the brakes on it,
with a quickness.
Buried, RIP, done!
- Okay, okay, okay.
- Ashes to ashes.
Listen, I don't know
what you've heard,
but me and him do not have
a sexual relationship at all.
That's what I was trying to...
Let me tell you something.
Shut up! Okay?
You don't have
nothing to say here!
I'm talking to Puerto Rico!
And you...
you can have his little
nasty ass if you want to.
I don't want him.
Girl, me neither.
But I'm kind of stuck,
because I signed the prenup
when we got married,
and I can't really
get out of it.
Anyway, the point is,
what y'all are doing is worse
than sleeping with each other.
Y'all are doing
business together.
And that's a problem.
Okay, so I don't
actually understand
what's going on right now.
Open your ears, Thickums!
The...
Hey! Hey!
What are you looking at?!
- You come over here!
- You-you just pointed at...
talking about this.
No, you are here with me.
You are on my team.
Okay? You don't play for Brazil.
They are a losing team anyway.
- But I'm not Brazil...
- I'm not done yet!
I'm talking to my husband!
I'm sorry.
Miss Willie Nelson over here
seems to think
that we are talking to her.
And we're not, ma'am!
We're having
a private conversation
over here at table two,
so if you wouldn't mind
- giving us a little privacy?
- Shh...
Thank you.
Time for you to get
on the road again!
Sorry about that.
Don't you sorry
about nothing for me!
I ain't done nothing
to apologize for!
Well, I'm sorry,
Ginuwine and Apollonia.
What are you all looking at?!
Now y'all got something...
I'm sorry, you got a attitude?
You got something you want to...
You want to buck?
That's right, you better
take her out to valet
so they can pull up
your little red Corvette,
Prince wannabe!
If I'm 'a deal with all of that,
I'm 'a damn sure
get something out of the deal.
And if he's spending
all that cheese on you
and your little
crotchless line of panties...
with the different fruit flavors
such as strawberry
and green apple...
then that is
dipping into our money.
Translation: my money.
And that I cannot have.
So bottom line: all business
between the two of y'all
from this point forward
is now dissolved.
Do you feel me?
And as far as this little tape
that you may or may not have
with my husband acting a fool,
you can feel free to do
whatever it is you want with it,
because that will be
on your conscience.
Excuse me. Let's go.
Jamaya, wait.
Wait?! Don't touch me!
- Okay.
- You can talk, but not touch.
All right, fine.
I made a mistake, okay?
I fucked up.
But I never actually
made a tape with him.
Look, I promise you, I've been
working so hard for the past
eight days,
and my lingerie line is amazing.
Jamaya, please.
Honestly, if you guys
pull out now,
you're gonna lose out
on so much money.
Clean the wax out,
Argentina,
and listen...!
You are fired.
You will leave the board room,
or I will call security.
Peace!
Come on, let's go!
I said let's go!
Ugh!
Vae, you know what I've noticed?
Rick has a really,
really nice body.
- Really though?
- But he does!
Okay, bae,
I was thinking about us,
and I was thinking about
how good it is
that we're rekindling our
relationship and everything.
I ain't trying to scare you off
again or nothing like that,
but I'm just saying,
bae, me and you,
you know we make a dope team.
I was talking to my mama
about you the other day,
and I was like,
"Ma, I love to talk,
and Rick, he loves to liste..."
Are you listening to me?
Yeah. Yeah, no.
You-you just said something
about your mom, right?
Oh, okay, so basically,
for example,
like, if I was to tell you
what happened in my day today,
I might say I went to the mall.
And when I went to the mall,
don't you know
I found that same pair of shoes?
It was the ones that had
the double straps with
the studs on them,
and them things was gleaming!
But I couldn't get them
last time, remember?
'Cause they didn't want
to take my layaway plan.
Like I wasn't gonna come back
with the money. Anyway...
Ugh. Starving?
- Completely.
- Yeah, I need to order.
- Hello!
- Ooh.
- Hey.
- Oh.
Okay, um, it's kind of dark,
don't you think?
I guess.
So you do know that you're
wearing sunglasses, right?
It's, like, a new trend
or something.
- Oh, my God, baby, what's wrong?
- What's wrong?
What is the matter?
Nothing. You guys just order.
Thank you, I'm hungry. -Okay,
yeah, I need to order because
they have the calamari tonight,
and I'm trying to get
a double order, 'cause
I'm eating for two, you know?
Oh, girl, no excuses.
I eat for one
- and I still order double.
- That is what I'm...
I'm such a horrible person!
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
- What are you talking about?
- What's going on? -What's wrong?
I did something bad.
And then I did something worse,
but then the second thing
was, like,
so bad that I didn't realize
the second bad thing
was so bad, because I was so
caught up with the first thing.
Okay.
Um, trying to understand,
get this straight.
So you did two bad things,
and so the first one
outweighed the second one?
No, the second one was worse!
- Oh, uh, uh, what did you do?
- Right, what...
Well, I blackmailed Lil Danger.
You know he's married, right?
Yes.
Okay.
And then we made a sex tape!
Wha...
You got a sex tape?
- Ugh...
- But then, no,
but we really didn't.
I just acted like I did because
I wanted him to give me money
for my lingerie line.
Ah. -And then I threatened
to tell his wife,
and then his wife found out.
Oh, my God.
And now my lingerie career
is over.
- Oh...
- Oh, no, your career is not...
You know your career is
just getting started, actually,
and to be honest, we have not
seen you work that hard, ever.
I agree with Lavae, and you know
I'm the hard one, right?
I have never seen you
this devoted
to anything in your life, sweetheart.
- Yeah. -Really?
- I'm proud of you.
Thanks, guys.
Girl, please,
don't worry about it.
You know, I think we're gonna
need a sister hug.
All right, fine, fine, fine.
She messed with Lil Danger.
Yeah. Oh.
It's okay.
That's how that all worked out.
So she basically was like,
"Girl, 25% off."
I said, "Say word? Say what?
Hallelujah one time for you."
I'm like, "El Shaddai!"
The Lord be coming through
for me, boo.
That's all I'm trying to say.
I be remembering things
like that, bae.
You know what I'm saying?
Like look
at the last time
you bought me them earrings.
I don't know how much they cost,
but I told everybody
that you spent a grip.
- I love you guys.
- I love you so much.
I love you more.
So what was that second thing?
Hey, Lex-slut!
Ah, shit.
Oh, honey.
I heard about what happened
with Mrs. Danger,
and I just want to say
I'm so sorry,
but truly I loved
working with you.
So if you ever want to come back
and work with
true professionals,
you know, please don't hesitate
to give us a call.
You know, really.
Um, oh, gosh.
I feel like I was
interrupting a sisterly thing.
So, um, sorry.
Cheers.
Bae, I'm a little thirsty.
Would you mind actually
making me, like,
a drink or something?
I think I want to do
a margarita.
You know how I like 'em...
with the salt...
Hold that thought...
matter of fact,
I want a Long Island.
'Cause you know I like some
things to be real long.
I-I'm sorry, I'll be right back.
Oh. Okay, but don't trip, boo.
I know how to...
I'll be right here.
I know how to pour this drink.
Seriously, dude?
What is your problem now, man?
My problem is
Sheila's in the next room.
And for some strange reason,
she actually likes you.
So why don't you show
a little respect? Damn.
As you can see,
he's a little busy right now.
True.
And I ain't on the clock
right now, man,
so you ain't my boss, brother.
And you damn sure
ain't my daddy.
So why don't you do me a favor,
stop trying to tell me
what the fuck to do?
Appreciate you.
Corrine Wells?!
Corrine damn Wells?
Of all the people you could
work with, Lex,
you choose
my number one competitor?
She's only thrown me
under the bus
both professionally
and personally,
I don't know, for years.
And you choose to work with her.
My baby sister, really?
Okay, first of all,
I didn't have a choice.
That's Lil Danger's P.R. person.
And if I didn't work with her,
the deal was gonna be off.
- I had no other choice.
- Uh, guys? -You know what, Lex,
that's fine, but when
were you gonna tell me?
Hold on, Lavae.
Okay, when was I
supposed to tell you?
I went to your office the
other day, and you completely
blew me off in front of
all of your coworkers.
Oh, really, you're gonna
throw this on me?
You're gonna blame all of this
back around onto me?
Since we were kids,
your ass has been immature,
and because you're playing
this "artiste,"
you know, you think
you can do whatever
you want to do;
you need to start taking...
You know what? I can't with you.
I'm not doing this with you
at all, Lex.
- Okay.
- Thank you very much.
I will see you at home.
I love you very much.
Bye-bye. Bye, Lex.
- Fine!
- Fine!
Come on, man.
If you gonna do this, you got to
take this shit somewhere else.
Look, brah, it's obvious
Sheila don't want your punk ass.
So stop trying to play the hero,
chill the fuck out.
Yeah, it's not about that; it's
about you showing some respect,
because you don't have none.
- Let me handle this real quick.
- Okay.
Yo, this ain't the movies, brah.
This ain't no fantasy world.
This the part where the hero
gets knocked the fuck out
for being a dumb-ass.
So why don't you be smart
and leave me the fuck alone
and go back to the bar?
Damn!
- Really?
- Tai.
Oh.
Damn.
Rick.
Look, She,
I hope you're not mad,
but the dude had it coming.
I heard what he said,
so it's okay.
And, no, "mad" would not
really be the words
I use to describe
what you did for me.
Look, Sheila, um...
I mean, I should have told you
that I bought them damn flowers
a long time ago.
What?!
What do you mean?
You bought the flowers?
Yeah.
Uh, I've been in love with you
since we were kids.
- She, She.
- Wh-What?
I think Lavae's having the baby.
- Right now? Is she okay?
- I don't know. I think so.
Is everything okay? Did you
talk to Thomas? -I didn't.
Push. I just need you
to push a little bit.
- -Come on now.
- You're doing fine.
Push!
Push.
Push! Push! Push!
You look beautiful, baby.
You look beautiful.
You are so...
Thank you, baby.
Now get this out my face.
Oh, okay. Oh.
- Okay, this is it! This is it!
- Don't you damn film down there!
- Are you crazy?!
- Oh, okay!
- I need you to push.
- Push now! Push! -Okay.
Bow!
Look, I was shooting
the whole time.
- Oh, my...
- The whole time.
- Oh, Thomas.
- Lavae must have loved that.
- Nah, she hated it.
- Hey, hey.
- What's up, everybody?
- Hey.
- Are these for Lavae?
- Yes.
How beautiful.
She's gonna love 'em.
Thank you.
You're welcome, Auntie Sheila.
I know. I'm an aunt.
So when do we get
to see the little princess?
Well, actually,
the doctor cleared us out
a while ago,
so she should be letting us in in a minute.
-Okay, cool.
- I know.
- Congratulations, Lexi.
Thank you.
Is everything okay?
No, it's fine. Whatever.
Can we just speak
for a moment, please?
- Okay, so how is my baby?
- The baby's doing fine.
Lavae is experiencing some very
serious complications right now.
Oh. -And while
we've done everything
that we can
to try to level it out,
we're just having a big problem.
Over the past 15 minutes,
it's only gotten
progressively worse,
and here's the bottom line.
We have got to take Lavae
into surgery immediately.
She gonna be okay?
We are going to do everything
that we can. -Oh.
Now, listen, she's slightly
sedated right now.
You can go in to see her,
and then we're gonna take her
down to the O.R., okay?
I can't go through all this
without you. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, too.
And, look, Lex,
we have to make a promise
that in the future,
no matter what,
that we always stand
by each other's side.
Like when we were kids.
Yes, like when we were kids.
- No matter what.
- No matter what.
I love you. -I love you more,
pretty girl. Mm.
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, girl.
Who told y'all to walk in?
Oh, I don't need to be told.
Hey, beautiful.
Nice. -Thank you
for my little niecey-poo.
Oh, my God.
Here. These are fresh.
Oh, that's so sweet.
- I know.
- Oh.
Here you go.
Yup, just one more hill
to climb,
and I'll... be there.
- Yeah.
- You'll climb it.
- Yeah.
- You have to, sis.
And I really hope you guys
make up, 'cause I'm not trying
to get up out of this bed
and kick y'all asses right now.
- You know I'll do both of y'all.
- This is my baby right here.
- Come here.
- Give me a hug. -Oh, look at.
- Anytime. -I love you, sis.
- Amen.
Ms. James, we are ready for you.
Right now?
- Wait.
- Are you ready?
Where's Mama's picture?
- Lexi, I have it.
- Where...? Oh, my God.
Thank God.
I'm taking her with me
as my guardian angel. -Okay.
Well, don't worry,
because you've got this.
Well...
You're gonna be fine, okay?
You're gonna be perfectly fine.
I'm really scared.
Don't be scared.
It's gonna be okay.
Gonna be okay.
It's okay, baby.
-Okay.
Okay. It's okay.
Okay, uh, let's do this.
Let's do this.
All right.
- Take care of my sister.
- We will.
I want you to remember this.
I'll be gone one day,
and all you'll have
is each other.
We are three sisters,
Three sisters are we,
I love each of you...
And I know you love me.
So I'll show you something.
What we could do is
we could take
the northern corner, right?
There's an off-ramp
that leads right into
that block.
He's on the back patio,
V.I.P. section.
Thank you.
Hey, good luck.
Go get 'em.
Bayside, but we're looking
for partners abroad, understand?
Mr. Shakir, I'm sorry
to interrupt your meeting.
Excuse me.
Okay, this is not the time
or place for this.
Okay, I tried everything.
Nothing worked. I just need...
Okay, if you want to set up
a meeting with me,
call my office, and I'd be happy
to set up an appointment.
Yes?
Yes.
Thank you.
No.
No!
Look, my sister Lavae taught me
something very important.
If you want something in
this world, you have to take it.
You don't sit back
and make appointments,
and you don't take no
for an answer.
And, look, I know
I don't deserve your business.
I made up a stupid story about
a legless dog having a stroke.
And I'm sorry.
I was lazy.
I felt entitled.
But all that's changed.
I've changed.
You need to come with me.
Please.
Ma'am.
60 seconds... that's all I need.
She's fine.
One minute.
45 seconds.
Right. Okay.
This is my lingerie line.
It's inspired
by the women in my family.
It's timeless,
it's elegant,
and it's sexy.
If you give me a chance,
you won't regret it.
They talk about
overnight success,
but for my baby sister Lexi,
it took 28 years,
ten months and 15 hours
to get where she was going.
And this is what she realized
when she got there:
is that in the moment,
the most exciting part
isn't who you are
or the fame or excitement,
it's watching the faces
of the people you love most
share in your success.
Hi, guys!
Oh, I'm so...
Oh, it's so good
- to see you!
- Good to see you.
Look at my little niece!
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.
This is amazing, Lex.
Thank you, babe.
Lexi, Lexi, oh, so sexy!
I'm so happy you guys are here.
Thank you so much. -Oh, girl,
where else would we be?
I know, but still,
it's so exciting.
Hey, we're gonna get some seats.
-Okay. -Okay.
Okay, so, look,
I'm gonna run with the boys,
but before I do,
I just want you to know that...
you know that they would be
so proud of you, right? -I know.
And... look,
Lex, I'm sorry.
I know we've had
some crazy times,
but... I am
so proud of you, too.
- Thank you, sis.
- Baby girl, you did it!
Oh, my God, look, what you did!
Oh!
You are amazing.
The show is gonna be amazing.
- Do your thing.
- I'm gonna run away. -Thank you.
- Okay, I'll see you out there.
- Okay.
- Lex, I love you.
- Love you, too.
Listen up, girls,
we go live in five minutes.
Y'all better get
y'all lives together.
Thank you.
Your show, babe.
And then you look down,
you get your inspiration,
and you fly.
Mom once said, "One day,
all we'll have is each other."
And she was right, because that
night it was my sisters, me
and my mom, all of us together
under the stars,
sharing in Lexi's success.
And what a night it was.
Danger... danger...
danger, danger and danger.
- Do you agree with that?
- He's top fi... -Who said that?
Lil Danger said he's top five...
rappers of all time.
- Who said that?
- Lil Danger.
Thank you. And full stop. Okay?
What about Wayne, Drake,
Kendrick Lamar? -Who?
- Wayne?
- Who's that?
- Drake. -I don't know that cat.
- Do you know who that is?
Light-skinned dude.
I could tell you
that I'm Naomi Campbell.
Okay, that's my opinion.
Someone else might see me
and be like,
"Actually, you're not."
Give me the banger,
'bout to turn this thing up
No, I'm no stranger
to a little danger
Give me the banger,
'bout to turn this thing up
No, I'm no stranger
to a little danger
Danger, danger
Lil Danger, Lil Danger
- Danger, hey, hey, hey
- No, I'm no
Stranger to a little danger
I'm 'a kick it up
like blas blah
And I storm through the spot
with my entourage
Talk, talking about some
money, man, I got too much
Now it's time to party,
put them bottles up
Bottoms up,
shake your bottoms up
I only like dots,
a whole lot of 'em
Is your booty real, girl?
Don't lie to us
You see-see the Gwhen I'm pulling up
Lil Danger gasoline,
go 'head, pump it up
And M&M me, hold the nuts
Bunch of gold jewelry,
I'm looking like King Tut
Oh, you want what?
What up, what up, what up
Give me the banger,
'bout to turn this thing up
No, I'm no stranger
to a little danger
Give me the banger,
'bout to turn this thing up
No, I'm no stranger
to a little danger
Hey...
- Yo
- Lil Danger
Lil Danger
Hey...
No, I'm no stranger
to a little danger
Hey...
- Yo, hey, hey
- Lil Danger, you know
- Hey, hey, hey, yo, hey
- Say, hey...
- Lil Danger, you know
- Give me the banger
'Bout to turn this thing up,
no, I'm no stranger
To a little danger,
give me the banger
'Bout to turn this thing up,
no, I'm no stranger
To a little danger
Danger, danger
- Lil Danger
- Danger, danger
Lil Danger
Hey, hey, hey
No, I'm no stranger
to a little danger...
You want a movie with a...
a little short dude,
Kevin Hart...
What's up, baby?
Is my wife coming?
Why is he so afraid of you?
'Cause I will whup...
that... ass.
Uh... is my wife
gonna see this footage?
- Nah, nah, nah.
- Oh, yeah, this girl,
one of the lovely girls
from the video shoot.
Okay. Yeah.
I ain't never scared.
But he is.
As well he should be.
I got some girls
I'm linking up with later.
You know, I keep it...
Make sure my wife don't hear
about that,
you know what I'm saying?
I've had to backhand him
a couple times.
And I'm not scared
to do it in public.
Peace!
I will Ike him up.
The dot's runneth over...
from my cup.
And, you know,
the spillage is there
for the rest of the team to get.
- You know, sop that up.
- Yeah.
Sop that extra runneth
over up, you know?
I made Lil Danger.
Lil Danger didn't do
all that by himself.
That was me, okay?
And I deserve a cut.