Something Beneath (2007) Movie Script
[ambient] [heavy machinery running] Are you afraid? What? Are you afraid? Afraid of what? You Dutch? Who wants to know? Not me.
I don't give a monkey's nut. Bob back there says
you're digging in his trench, if you catch my drift. And he's on his way here,
so heads up, loverboy. You're a prince, man. Hey.
[slaps pipe] If anyone asks,
I had a doctor's
appointment, okay? [scoffs] [bubbling] [blade slams] Hey, Bob. I didn't see you
climb up in there. [bulldozer engine racing] Hey, it's a good gag,
man, really. [bulldozer engine racing] Uh, hey, you wanna
talk about this? Okay. Cut it out, okay? [whimpering] [engine revs] Hey, look, man, I didn't
know she was your old lady. Come on, please! [engine revs] Damn it! [wire snapping] [grunts] [footsteps approaching] Holy crap! Dude, he is so dead. Who is it? I don't know. We better call someone. I guess. [cell phone beeping] Days without a workplace
injury...zero. Dude, look at his face. [Man]
Thank you very
much for seeing me on such short
notice, Mr. Kent, but I believe
that you will-- you will find this
completely scintillating and-- and quite exciting. [clears throat] Anyway, um... this is the crux
of the problem, you see. If you look at
the population decline in the grgrayy ground
squirrels-- Ground squirrels? We're building a world-class
executive retreat, and you're wasting Mr. Kent's
time with ground squirrels? Mr. Kent, the animal life
at Cedar Gate is disappearing. Um, let's-- Squirrels and rabbits,
field mice. I mean, even the bird
population has dwindled almost overnight, and for no apparent
scientific reason. Now, until we have a chance
to study this further, I strongly suggest
you hold off excavating an extensive
drainage system. I see. So you want me
to lay off 65 men and put a half million dollars
of heavy equipment on blocks because you can't find
enough field mice? Mr. Connelly-- Doctor Connelly. Doctor Connelly. [inhales] Of course. I'm well aware
of your reputation. That's why I hired you. Now you said that the
soil toxicity is minimal. Oh, yes, but-- And apart from one death, and that was
alcohol related, we've had no problem
on the site. Well, now that's not true. You have one big problem. Me. I can't endorse commercial
development at this time. Sit down. Good idea. [wheelchair motor whirrs] Now, you-- You-- Take Doctor Connelly
out of here. This man is
a security risk. Make sure that he never slips
into this building again. I'm a scientist! [motor whirring] Why me? Why do I always get stuck
with the global warming nuts? [thuds] I'm Vicky Valentines
reporting from Channel 6 news. We're here today at the
Clean Planet Concordance where we're hoping
to meet some celeb-- Oh, I believe we
have someone here. Finally.
It's Mikaela. Hi.
Mikaela, you're
a glamorous girl. Why are you
here today? I just have a soft spot
for the environment. I'm just so
happy to be here. [Woman]
Isn't this exciting? Our first conference and it's
the Clean Planet Concordance. God, they're famous! Famous for being
an effete bunch of tree-huggers
and whale-lovers. They should try
doing my job. I doubt any one of us
could manage a hotel. And talk about
multi-tasking. I couldn't imagine a
more challenging job. Well, we like to
think of ourselves as a conference center,
rather than a hotel, but you're right
about the multi-tasking.
Doug Middleton. I'm nominally in charge
of this bunch and they had this dumb idea that anyone who can live off
grubs and tree bark in the Papua New Guinea
highlands can coordinate a conference. That isn't
a dumb idea at all. I'm Kaley Spence, the
events coordinator here. Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you. Oh, this is Aimee,
my assistant. If there's anything you need,
please let me know. You're our first
big conference, and we want to make sure
everything is perfect. Everything
will be perfect. Of course, it will. I have complete faith
in all of you. [cell phone ringing] Symes. There's no
plumbing problem. Help! Shoot, rats, shoot. Don't let her
get me, please. Don't let who get you?
What's the matter? She's lost it. There's smoke coming
out of her ears.
Who? Don't even think about
avoiding me, Eugene Herman! [sighs]
Too late. I am livid. Can you see
how livid I am? I didn't miss
Tyra Banks' birthday to play second
banana to you. Miss Strovsky,
can I help you with something? Yes, hold this. CNN didn't come
all the way out here to photograph some nerdy
Web blogger with bad skin. What idiot made you
keynote speaker? I would be the
idiot in question. Miss Strovsky,
it is my pleasure to meet you, and I am very sorry
about the schedule change. But when I read Eugene's
piece on climate variation, I was so impressed with it. [dog barking] [gasps] Oh, Cleopatra.
[dog whining] Oh, poor baby! Did she hurt you? I-- I didn't know
it was in there. I was bitten when I was
a kid and I've just-- I've been terrified
of dogs ever since. I'm really sorry.
Ignorance is no excuse. [cameras clicking] I'd like you to stop
by my room, Father, to discuss your scheduling. Oh, and by the way,
I love The Thorn Birds. Ah, you forgot-- [fingers snapping] ...your dog.
Thank you, thank you. You saved me from the Wicked
Witch of the Upper West Side. Right, with my
little dog phobia. Well, you're afraid of dogs,
I'm afraid of public speaking. My mother's afraid
of margins. Everybody's afraid
of something. It's okay, Eugene. No one ever died
from public speaking. Found your room yet?
[inhales] Well, everything seems
to be off to a good start. Oh, right. Sorry.
[yips] Oh, yeah. I'll get her dog
back to her. [inhaler rattling] [inhaler hisses softly]
[inhales] We're all going to die! [coughing] We're all going to die! You're gonna die and you. And, oh, we both know
you're gonna die. Unless we do-- unless-- unless-- Where am I? Unless we take immediate action to reverse the damage
we're doing to the envirody-- envirody-- environment, humanity as a species is-- is doomed! Be afraid,
ladies and gentlemen. Be very afraid. [coughing] That wasn't so bad. Kind of liked it. Thanks, tree,
you're always there for me. Oh, oh, perfect. I can just see myself
at the podium, shaking the hands of
a Nobel Prize winning biologist and I smear black goo
all over him. I'm such a loser. Why am I even here? [inhales] [thunderclap] [thunderclap] Hello? Is anybody there? [thunderclap] I think I took a wrong turn. [inhales] [thunderclap] Is anyone else here? [thunderclap]
Hello? [creature snarling] Hello? [thunderclap] [inhales] [thunder rumbling] [creature shrieking] [screaming] Help! Oh, boy. Sheik Abdullah
requires halal meal service. Halal, that's just
like kosher, right?
I guess. Some sort of weird diet plan refrigeration made irrelevant
a million years ago. My sister-in-law
still keeps kosher. Oh. Hey, can you believe
that globe-trotting he-man is a priest? Father Douglas Middleton,
whoa, that's just-- A total waste of man flesh. I was going to say creepy. And Miss Strovsky
with the little dog, is that Mikaela Strovsky from the cover of
Vanity Fair last month? Yes, and interview
with Vogue, one notorious
layout in Hustler. Oh. Why creepy? You haven't had
a, you know, bad experience with
a priest, have you? God, no. I mean, no. They've all been
perfectly lovely. It's just,
I don't know. Priests, nuns, rabbis, they just make me
self-conscious, you know? Like, did I just take
the Lord's name in vain? Are my pants too tight? I'm gonna go break
the news to the chef. They're a little tight. I am way, way too cute
to be out in the wilderness on a stupid conference. Like, environmental
people are really ugly. Is she talking
to herself? And my room is
about this big, and there is no
spa at this hotel. Oh, ah, either that, or she's
having a philosophical debate with her laptop. I'm not sure
which is worse.
Neither am I. But if the dog
answers her back, that might be
pretty entertaining. Say my dinner date
bailed on me tonight. Any chance I can talk
you into joining me? Me? Mm-hmm.
[stammering]
Oh, I don't-- Oh, the food here
is that bad, huh? No, no, it's just that
I have so much to do before the rest
of the guests-- You're not gonna
make me go over there and talk to the dog,
are you? And nobody knows
how to dress. Like, come on. Sure, okay. Thank you. So, who stood you up? My keynote speaker,
and I am crushed. Oh, Eugene.
Mmm. Oh, he's probably
hiding under his bed. Now, don't judge
a book by its cover. He's a brilliant
young man. Eugene's mean green
machine kicks ass-- Environmentally speaking. So, let's go see
what she's doing. And my sheets have
a thread count of about zero!
[huffs] Anyways, everyone knows that
my father funds fifty percent of CPC's annual budget. When Daddy hears that they
snubbed me in favor of a geek, who couldn't even get elected
student body president, OMG, he's absolutely
gonna lose it! [fingers snapping] Waiter, menu now! [sighs]
Everybody's so slow here. She has a video blog,
of course, she does. Sometimes I wonder
about my calling. An all-knowing
and merciful god would never have
created celebutantes. Can you please,
um, get me a menu? And my table is dirty! You're not like any other
priest I've ever met. People keep
telling me that. I hope it's a compliment. It is.
Good. I'm-- I'm sorry.
May I? Oh, my-- my pendant.
Yes. [chuckling]
Sure. It was a gift
from my grandmother. Is she from around here? Yeah, yeah.
How did you know? Well, it's an
Anishinabe artifact. It's typical of the Ojibway
who are indigenous to the area. Wow! You know more
about it than I do. My grandmother was Ojibway. She died when I was young,
and this is all I have of her. Call it superstitious,
but I never take it off. Don't confuse spirituality
with superstition. The Ojibway have
a belief system
that connects all living things to aki-- the Earth. I'm afraid you're talking
to a confirmed agnostic. Really? Mm-hmm.
Well, technically, agnostic means you haven't
made up your mind, so I won't put you down
as a confirmed anything
just yet. Cheers. [glasses clinking] [wind blowing] Good morning. Good morning. I don't suppose you've
seen Eugene this morning,
have you? Not a hair. And I've been up for,
oh, way too long. Have you checked his room? Yeah, yeah,
there's nothing. The door was locked,
of course. It's just dinner last night and then I can't find him
anywhere today, it's just strange.
Yeah. I'll check with security. That'd be great.
[radio beeps] Aimee, can you have Jackson
Deadmarsh meet us at security? Deadmarsh. [bell dings] Jackson Deadmarsh? Well, there can't be
two Jack Deadmarshes. Did he used to be chief
of police in Eugene, Oregon? Yeah, yeah. We're lucky
to have someone with
his qualifications. Do you know him? Sort of. I sued him. The church's freedom
project filed suit on behalf of a young Native
American convicted of murder. The boy insisted
that Deadmarsh had fabricated
evidence against him. Well, that wasn't
on his resume. I'm not surprised. Anyway, it was dropped. Either Deadmarsh was clean,
or he hid his tracks well. What happened
to the convict? Jim Bailey?
He was executed. Ooh. These need to be secured,
so make a note. Jackson! Kaley. I was just saying to Tony
how these side entrances need to have
security locks, so only guests with
key cards can get in. What would we
do without you? You've met father
Douglas Middleton? I know him
by reputation. To what do we owe the
pleasure of this visit? My keynote speaker
is missing. No one's seen him
since last night. We were hoping you
had him on your radar. Eugene Herman, late 20's,
kind of awkward for his age. Yeah, propeller head,
the geek. Nope, I haven't
spotted him. Oh. Can you let us
into his room then? We just want to
make sure he's okay. He's asthmatic. This altitude
is hard for him. Not a problem. Not you, though. This is hotel business. But--
It's-- It's fine, Kaley. I'll go check the library. I've fallen asleep
in the stacks more than once myself. I'll catch up
with you later. Okay. Hey. So you two have history, there's no need to
be rude to a guest. Just doing my job the best way I know how. It's what I've always done. Of course. My job. The best way I know how. Okay. Tony, hold down
the fort, will you? Sure thing, boss. [door closes] [beeping] Mr. Herman? Hotel security. [banging] Eugene? [banging continues] There's someone
in there. Okay. It's-- It's broke. I'm fixing it, I swear. Deadmarsh, you
shoot my apprentice, and I'll make you
clean the crud out of the bathroom drains. Old habits die hard,
you know what I mean? Father Middleton is missing
one of his delegates. Have you see the
guy who stays here? Ain't seen no one no how. Well, did Eugene call
for maintenance himself? Maybe. Everyone and their
mother-in-law's been calling. Mikaela Strovsky's
got us on speed dial. There's some kind of
blockage in the drain system, and I can't find
it to save my life. Well, you keep
at it, Reggie. I have confidence
in you. But if you see him,
give us a call, all right? Sure thing, Kaley. Hank, I can use you in here.
[door closes] And take those damn things out
of your ears before you go deaf. [goo slithering] Look at this!
It's all over me. I can't wash Cleopatra.
I can't wash myself.
[dog whimpering] All that comes out
of the sink is goo. Goo and more goo! Yes, well there must be some
kind of a plumbing problem. You're the conference
coordinator. Shouldn't you be handling
these types of things? See, I don't actually...
work for the hotel.
All my nails are falling off. I'm a guest as you are,
and I'm not much of a plumber. But, you know what?
I will call maintenance for you. [dog barking]
Cleo! Wait! Oh, Mikaela, don't you think
you should get dressed first? Naughty boy. You were looking
at my ta-tas. I thought you
were a priest. I am a priest. I'm not a corpse. [chuckles] You're funny. Have you always
been so funny? My mother thinks so. You like Mikaela,
don't you? You know, I've always had
a thing for men in collars, just all seems so...
naughty. Cleopatra. Your dog? Tell maintenance that
they can retrieve my dog. And I'd like her bathed before
she's returned to my room. Your loss. [door slams] It's never easy. Hola. Bonjour. Buon giorno. I hope you all are
having a beautiful day. Mikaela is having
a terrible day. Cleopatra has run off. I'm distraught. Cleopatra is my life. [zapping] Hippo? Hmm, anyways... Hey, boss,
it's an inhaler. The preacher said
the kid had asthma. Boss. Jeez! Ah, jeez. Look at his face! You look at his face,
I'm going back to the lodge. I've never seen asthma
do that to anyone before. What do you want me to
do with the body, boss? Do you want me to throw
it in the infirmary? Oh, yeah, that'll help. Put him in the
kitchen cooler. Are you joking? Do I look
like I'm joking? The chef will have
a heart attack and then we got two
bodies to worry about. Maybe we should call
the funeral parlor. They can warehouse the body
until we notify the next of kin. What? Funeral parlors, dead bodies,
it all gives me the willies. Ah, tough guy, huh? Look, all I'm asking you to
do is secure a body, okay? Not spend a night in a coffin. Why'd you have to put
that idea in my head? Now I'm not gonna
sleep for a week. You're an ass, Deadmarsh. I'm the ass that
signs your time cards. Look, if you can't
make the call, put the body in the cooler before he gets up and
starts moving around! [dial tone] [phone slams] Isaac found me the
most wonderful outfit to open the Clean
Planet Concordance. Isaac Mizrahi. [gasps] [chuckles] Whew. A word to the wise,
my darlings. If you're going to
drink in the morning, make sure it's
clear beverages only. Vodka, gin, hmm. What else is clear? Water. [faucet squeaks]
[gurgles] Ugh. Ick and more ick. [gasps] [goo slithering] Very funny! [screaming] [screams] [goo dripping] Stop it!
Stop it! [goo dripping, bubbling] [heavy breathing] [crash] [thunderclap]
[zap] No. [thunderclap]
[zap] [screaming] [panting] Not me. Not me. [screaming] [snarling] Kaley! It's okay, it's okay. [speaking Ojibway] Housekeeping, hello? Housekeeping. Kaley? Kaley! This is an
exclusive property. We can't have
dead people here. This is very bad for us. No good for Eugene,
either. What was that? Eugene, he was
a good kid. Super shy, terrified
of public speaking. It's a horrible way to die,
don't you think? Hello? Housekeeping. [screaming] Earth to Kaley.
Can you empathize with me
for 10 seconds here, please? This is our
first conference. I don't want it
to be our last. We can't afford for
anything to go wrong. [screaming] [phone ringing] Events, Kaley speaking. What? This is great. This is just...great. I didn't do anything.
I didn't touch her. Of course you didn't, Manuela. She obviously
committed suicide. Poor girl must have
been very unhappy. Unhappy about what? Her father is
rich as Croesus. She was famous
just for being famous. She's got
everything she wants. Well, maybe when you
have everything, you're afraid of
losing everything. Probably drugs. This is exactly
how you found it? I didn't touch anything. Okay, well I'll tell
the police that, but they may still
want to talk to you. Miss Kaley, can I go? I feel ill. I'll call you if
I need you, okay. [cell phone beep] Are you crazy? We have to file
a police report. We don't need to
file it right now. She killed herself. What difference are
the police going to make? Well, what do you
want me to do? Call our cop-- Deadmarsh. He can stash her
with asthma boy. And, uh, get Reggie
to replace that mirror. Kaley, how's my favorite
events coordinator? It's Alvin Symes, Mr. Kent. Good to hear your voice. Big week, huh? Mr. Kent, there have been
some unfortunate developments. One of the conference delegates
was found dead this morning from an apparent
asthma attack. And just now-- Now what?
Spit it out, Symes. Mikaela Strovsky
slit her wrists. Who? Wait. Leon Strovsky's kid? I'm afraid so. What the hell is
wrong with you? How could you
let this happen? Her, of all people? It wasn't my fault.
I promise you. I did everything to make
opening week perfect, detail perfect. Has the press got
wind of this yet? The only ones who
know are the maid who found the
body and Kaley. She wants to call
the police. No frickn' way. That's what
I told her, but-- If this goes wide, the only conferences
we'll get at Cedar Gates will be celebrity death tours. Do you want to
operate a shuttle bus? No, sir. Well, keep it under wraps until P.R. puts
the right spin on it. You can do that much,
can't you? What do you want me
to tell the staff? You tell them, anybody opens their mouth, and they're out of a job. And Alvin, that includes you. Reggie? Are you down here? Reggie? Reggie? [video game on TV] Reggie? [scream]
[sinister laughter] Jeez, Hank. What a mess. Reggie? [sinister laughter] Reggie. Reggie? [gasps] It's just a little dog, Kaley. It's okay. Cleopatra? [dog whining] [whistling] Come here. [whistling] [dog whimpers] [whistling] [thunderclap]
[growling] No. No. [growling] [thunderclap] [scream] [heavy breathing] [thunder rumbles] [gasps] [thunderclap] [thunderclap] [growling] [thunderclap] [growling] No. No. [snarling] [thunderclap] [growling] [growling] [scream] Where did it go? Where did what go? The dog,
the wolf-dog. Is it hiding? Kaley, there is no dog. How did you get here? You were calling
for help.
I was? Yeah. I don't remember. Thank you. Ah, it's all right. There's nothing
to be afraid of. Just 'cause
you're not afraid doesn't mean there's
nothing to be afraid of. I think I just
found your dog. [speaking Ojibway] Great Spirit,
teach us to love, to heal the Earth
and each other. I am life, I am love,
and I do not fear. Here, drink this. It's non-caffeinated. Thanks. There was no wolf. My men searched the basement. There was no wolf, only just Mikaela
Strovsky's poodle, and she was in no shape
to chase anything. It's a papillon. Whatever. Oh, we never did find a
suicide note in her room. Is that important? Is it suspicious? Not all suicides
leave notes. But a camera hog
like Mikaela... I can't imagine her not
wanting to have the last word. It wasn't really a wolf. It was a cross-breed-- half wolf,
half German Shepherd. How do you know? Because I remember it. It was our neighbor's dog,
from when we were kids. So evil. The dog or the neighbor? Both. Father Fitch
and his wolf-dog, Ajax. We used to play in the ruins
of his old chapel. He caught us
fooling around once and he sic'd Ajax on us. He bit me so bad,
he put me in the hospital. I've been terrified of dogs
my whole life because of it. That was the animal
that attacked you today? Yeah. [laughing] That was 20 years ago. Maybe you just got a few
of your facts mixed up. It's not the kind
of thing you forget. [sinister laughter] [video game continues] Hank? Hank? Rot in hell,
Sister Mary Augusta. [video game gunshots] Off your duff, Hank.
We got work. Buzzkill! I was five seconds away from breaking
my lifetime high score
in House of the Dead. Yeah, yeah, by pretending
the zombies are your teachers from Catholic
elementary school. Those are some
scary nuns, man. Hey, everyone
needs motivation. What are the moon suits for? We got to go
down in the sewer. The drains are plugged
worse than ever. Guests are checking out, and Symes is
having palpitations. Symes can rot in hell. Hmm. Guests are checking out
'cause the damn building's got a death curse on it. Hank! You know, any time I doubt
the existence of God, all it takes is one look
at a view like this to convince me. You mean you don't
always believe in God? Isn't that a basic
job requirement? Sorry. This is weird. What's weird? Talking to a priest
about his vocation, or talking to a priest
like he's a regular guy? [chuckles]
Both. See, my calling is about
more than belief. It's about faith, which some people define
as belief without evidence. For instance, everyone here says
there's no trace of your wolf
in the basement. But, I believe you saw
what you say you saw. You do? I do. Well, I wish somebody
else believed. I've got Symes that's
this close to firing me. I'm losing the
confidence of my staff. And with two mysterious deaths,
your delegates are suddenly remembering they have
pressing business in Beijing. It's been a very strange
last few days, hasn't it? Yeah. Come on, walk with me. So when did you decide you
wanted to be a priest? Ah, I was called to
service when I was 13. How does a 13-year-old boy
think that God is calling him? It's funny, I never wondered
about that for a minute. I always wondered
why God called me. I'm serious. So am I. It's not like wanting
to be an astronaut, or a firefighter. How do you know at 13 you're not gonna want
to get married, or have kids,
or have-- [laughing] I'm, I'm not a
Catholic priest. I'm Episcopalian. What? We get married,
we have children, and we can even hold hands
at the movie theater. Oh. So then why aren't you... Married?
Yeah. I travel a lot. I'm devoted to my mission. I just haven't found
the right gal. Oh. Or maybe I'm afraid
of commitment. So in other words,
you're a typical man. Get out before
it's too late! Whoa, wait. Who was that? Let's go find out. Come on, come on. [chain clanging] Watch it. Who needs video games? This is real-life Tomb Raider. Yeah, or Doom. I hate my job. What the hell? What? We're in a sewer, we should be in muck
and water up to our knees. It's almost dry. And that's bad?
Hell, yeah. It means there's an
obstruction all right, and it's freakin' huge. Okay. I'm gonna
go get some help. Hey, easy, cowboy. First, we find
the blockage, then once we know
what we're up against, we get some help. You can take off
your respirator. There's no toxic gas
or nothing. [explosion in distance]
What was that? [breathing] Methane gas pocket. I thought you said there
was no toxic gas down here. Methane ain't toxic,
just flammable. Terrific. [water sloshing underfoot] Reg, I'm tired. This stuff weighs a ton. Do I have to wear it? You can walk around naked
for all I care. [door creaking] [whistles] Hey! It ain't lunchtime yet. Yeah, yeah. [goo dripping] What the hell? [gasps] Reg, what is this? [banging] Did you find anything? [banging] [grunts] Reg? [heavy breathing] Reggie? [sinister laughter] [screaming] [doorknob rattling] [shrieking in distance] [screaming] [screaming] [thunderclap] [moaning in distance] Hello? [moaning] Hello? [moaning] Oh, no! [thunderclap] Hank? Hank, where are you? [gasps] Reggie! Hank! [shouting] Reggie! I'm coming! [zombies groaning] [screaming] [screaming] [whimpering] Hank! No! No! No, Hank! [screaming] [zombies groaning] Hank, what are you doing? [screaming] [zombies groaning] [screaming] How did he disappear
so fast? I don't know. What's this? It's an old shed from
when all they had up here
were summer cabins. Well, it looks like
they're still using it. Been no one up
for years. Really? Then why is there
a brand-new padlock
on the door? [thunder rolling] Hold on. Okay. I didn't know they taught
breaking and entering at Divinity school. Ha, temptation is
everywhere, my dear, you just have to know
when to use it for good. Right. Move. They didn't
teach me that. After you. It's bigger
than it looks. This place is amazing. What the hell
is all this? Don't touch it!
[scream] Don't you know a sterile
workplace when you see one? Some people, jeez! Sorry, Father. You know who I am? Father Douglas Middleton,
the crusading priest. Everyone knows you. Besides, we were
at a conference
together in Tokyo. You spoke on
renewable energy. I did soil erosion. I'm always stuck
with soil erosion. You're Walter Connelly,
the biologist. What do you want,
a gold star? Catch up. We don't have
much time. You said that already. How did you get here? And how long have
you been here? Why don't you tell me
about your misadventure
in the basement? You know about that? Can we just stipulate
that I ask and you answer? The basement--
What happened? There was a dog. Half wolf, half dog,
and I recognized it. Before that. What happened before
you saw the dog? Nothing. I was on my way
to the maintenance office. You didn't touch anything? Come into contact
with anything strange? Ah, now that you mention it, something dripped on me
from an overhead pipe, something dark and sticky. I mean it wasn't oil
exactly, or tar, but... Was this what
dripped on you? It looks like it. What is that? Now that's the same stuff that Mikaela
had smeared on her. And a guy,
Eugene Herman. Then it touched
Dutch on the leg. Dutch? Who's Dutch? You heard about
the construction worker that died here, right? That was Dutch. It was right after
that that I moved in, to answer your question. I think I drove? Did I take a bus? Maybe I jogged. Was there a ferry involved? Your wolf, Mikaela's suicide,
Eugene's asthma attack, they're all
connected to this. Ah, stand back. All right, come on. Ah, that way. And whatever you do... ...don't touch. It's moving. Of course, it's moving. It's alive. What? Ladies and gentlemen,
you are looking at a highly intelligent
sentient life form. An entirely new species. I was hoping for some
kind of an audience. Applause? Awkward. Here, look at this. [beeping] Well, that's the sewer system
under the conference center. Exactly. My theory is that the creature
has a hive mind, like bees or ants, and that when its extremities
were attacked by the sewer excavation-- Wait a minute.
No one attacked it. Yeah, but it doesn't
know that, does it? It's like if you accidentally
step on an ant colony, then all the ants will
all gather and they'll attack. Look at this thing,
it's growing. It is, indeed. Feeling attacked,
the creature regrouped. The rate of growth
is logarithmic. What are all
these dense areas? It's building dams,
a network of them,
all through the system, all in communication
with one another. That explains your
plumbing problem.
Yeah. This is remarkable. How big is this
thing gonna get? I have no idea. It might encompass the
entire mountain range. Maybe all of
North America. This could be the largest
creature on Earth! Well, then we'd
better find out. If we're gonna
fight this thing, we have to know what
we're up against. [groans] This is why I never
leave the lab. Why is it that human beings
always default to warfare. And you, a priest! This thing is killing
people, Connelly. Well, we can
communicate with it, we can find out
what it wants! I know what it wants. It wants us dead. Oh, that's so clich. Word to the wise,
my darlings. If you're going to
drink in the morning, make sure it's
clear beverages only. Vodka, gin, hmm. What else is clear? Water. [heavy breathing] [crash] [heavy breathing] Ah! Oh! Look, don't tell me
to call maintenance. I did call maintenance.
There is no one in maintenance. Oh, oh, yeah?
Well, you're fired. Mr. Symes?
What do you want? The problems
that we're having with the plumbing
might be part of a larger issue
that may be dangerous. Dangerous? Where did
you get that from? Walter Connelly,
the biologist. He's been studying the
underground ecosystem. Connelly!
That nutcase? He's been trying to shut
us down since day one. That man was put on
Earth to irritate me. Listen, if we
don't act fast, these guests are going to
start to evacuate themselves. Get Reggie down in
that damn sewer. I've already
told him twice. And if you can't do that,
you're fired! No, no,
you listen to me. No, I'm afraid you
don't understand. No, I'm afraid-- [squish] Oh, damn it! [phone clatters] Aimee, what's wrong? What isn't wrong? Eugene is dead.
Mikaela's dead. Symes keeps calling
every five minutes asking, "Where's Reggie?" You leave me here alone.
It's okay. I don't know how
to make conversation with Nobel Prize
winning physicists. And now, the toilets
are blocked up and I don't
know what to do. It's okay.
I'm here now. Now tell me,
where was Reggie the last anyone
heard from him? The sewer. The sewer. He actually went
into the sewer? Yeah. Him and Hank both. Symes said that
they better find out what's blocking up
the drains or else. This can't go
on any longer. Call the staff. We're evacuating
the facility. Evacuating?
Yes. Symes will have kittens. Screw that tight-ass
little bootlick. Something bad is
going on around here. And whatever it is,
it's getting worse. Now, get everyone out now! What do you want me
to say to them? Tell them we're closed
for repairs. Tell them the conference
is cancelled, and tell them to follow you
because you're leaving, too. I'm not going anywhere
if you're not. Aimee, I need you gone. Please, for me. [gurgling] [gurgling] Okay. Not for nothing, boss, But Reggie and Hank
went down the sewer, they never came back. I'm just saying is all. That's exactly why
we're going in. That's disgusting.
Don't touch it! I don't know what it is, but it's killing people. Whatever is happening
up there, it's connected
to something down here. Okay, let's get it
before it gets us. [click] What was that? Combustible gases. The place is probably
full of this stuff. Come on. Good. Check that end. [gun cocks] [banging, clattering
in distance] You. It is you. I knew it was you. Symes... what are you doing
down here? Me? You're the one sabotaging
my grand opening. [laughs] Who did you sell
me out to, huh? Careful, sir. Oh, here's your buddy. I never wanted to
hire you, you know. Once a crooked cop,
always a crooked cop. Put down the gun, sir. But you came cheap. It's always about
the bottom line, right? Symes, there's
something down here and it got Reggie. That lazy bastard, he's just hiding out
somewhere. I'm warning you! Jack, are you afraid? What? Are you afraid, Jack? [body thuds] He was-- He was
gonna kill you. It's all right, kid. You couldn't help it. Thanks. Come on. Kid! [explosion]
Kid, come on! [explosion] Tony, hurry up! [footsteps approaching] [explosion] [explosion] Boss! Tony? [screams, grunts in distance] Kid? [grunts] [explosion] [explosion] [explosion] Ah, kid. [footsteps approaching]
[explosion] Stop or I'll shoot! Relax. It's just
a rent-a-cop. Jackson, it's all
right, it's us.
Put the gun down! Put the light down! Testy. I don't bite...
yet, gee. Are you okay? Don't worry about me. I can take care
of myself. But you're down
here alone? No, I came down with Tony. He's dead.
What? Symes is dead, too. How the hell did
you get down here? Oh, everything's connected
to everything down here. The padre and I came down
a transverse back that way, she caught up with us. Scared the living Jes--
Sorry, Father-- Scared the living crap
out of me, I tell you what. Who is this lunatic? Chief of Police Deadmarsh,
Meet Dr. Connelly. He's been studying the new
life form that's taken hold down here in the sewer.
Does he know
his new life form's already killed four people? Actually, it's five. I warned the developers
that this new drainage system runs right down her throat. Her? What?
What, it's a female? I like to think
of it that way.
Oh, great! He's got a crush
on the thing! Hey, it's a massive fluid,
multi-celled entity, whose separate parts
can move independently, or reticulate into
a single network. What's not to love? We think it emits an organic
hallucinogen of some kind. Even a drop of this
black slime on your skin, and a chemical gets
in your bloodstream and creates
a violent psychosis. Think octopus,
think skunk, think-- Think rationally! [explosion] Eugene died of
an asthma attack. Exactly. The chemical elicits
our deepest fears and manifest them. In Eugene's case, he was afraid of choking up
at the podium. He externalized that fear
by choking to death. And I saw myself being
attacked by my worst fear-- a wolf-dog. But you didn't die. Doug-- Father Middleton,
he got to me in time. So, Mikaela saw something
in her mirror that-- that frightened her badly
and-- and what? Symes was a victim
of his own paranoia? Each of them touched
the creature, or were touched by it. I know.
I can't wait to publish! Dial it back, doc. First, let's see if we
can get out of here alive. More importantly,
see if we can find a way to stop this creature
from killing again. I've been down here-- [explosion]
...whoa, dozens of times. There's a transverse pipe about a quarter mile along that leads out
to the water tank. [explosion] Look out!
[screams] [explosion]
Oh, my God. Thanks. Yeah. [explosion] Oh, crap. You don't want
to see this. Don't want to see what? [screams] [screams] Reggie. Reggie. I am the resurrection and
the life, sayeth the Lord. He that believeth in me
though he were dead, yet shall he live.
Amen. Amen. What good does that
mumbo jumbo do Reggie now? Maybe nothing.
Maybe it's for us. It's the mumbo jumbo,
the old words,
they connect us. Much like the woods
carved right here, connect you to
your grandmother. [rumbling] Let's get out of here. Wait! Wait!
What? Do you hear something? [water sloshing] Oh, boy. Oh, my God. That's bad. She's building a dam right in front of our eyes. She's sealing us in,
you idiot. Come on! [explosion]
Yeah. [explosion] This tunnel leads
to the silo. Cut across the bridge
and out. [klaxon blaring] It's huge. The developers
aren't finished here. They're gonna turn
Cedar Gate into a city. Now you know why she
feels so threatened. Where's Jackson? [klaxon continues] [explosion] Jackson? Jackson!
Deadmarsh! Jackson,
what are you doing? You keep going. I'll try to slow it down. Kaley. That's suicide.
Don't do this. Deadmarsh! Deadmarsh, you don't
have anything to prove! [explosion] You want to bet? [rumbling] Anyway, it's too late for me. I got nailed hours ago. Be the preacher.
Get the flock out of here. Jackson,
I was wrong about you. Jackson? [chuckles]
No, you weren't. Come on, baby.
Follow me. Jackson! [explosion] Jackson!
We have to go!
Come on! [fire crackling] She's beautiful. We have to get
across that bridge, it's the only way out. [screams] What are you doing? Connelly,
get off the bridge! I have to talk to her. She's beautiful. You don't know
anything about it, except that it's dangerous. Connelly, just come back. She's a sentient creature. We need to respect
her right to exist! We need to find
another way out of here! She deserves respect! She deserves respect. [screams] [screams]
No! Grab my hand. Grab my hand! [rumbling] Grab my hand. No! [zapping] Come on, you bitch! [explosion] Hey!
[clicking] Officer Deadman!
[clicking] What's up?
[clicking] I sure could use a light. [clicking] Bailey. [laughing]
[clicking] You knew I'd come back,
didn't you? Let's just say
I'm not real surprised. [explosion] You framed me,
you bastard. You planted evidence,
and I was innocent. You didn't kill
Tim Jefferson, doesn't mean
you were innocent. What about
Olivia Red Bear? [explosion] I wasn't charged
with rape, dumb ass. [explosion] I was on trial
for murder. [explosion] And you lied
under oath. That's right,
Bailey, I did. What's the punishment
going to be? What do you think? We both rot in hell? After you. [click]
[zapping] [screaming] [metal clanking] [screaming] Don't let me go!
Just hang on to me! [screaming] Hang onto me! Please, don't let me go!
I'm not gonna let you go! [screams] [creature chittering] No!
Kaley! [screams] No! Kaley! Kaley! [screaming] [zapping] [gasps] Don't let me go! [speaking Ojibway] [speaking Ojibway] [speaking Ojibway] [Woman speaking Ojibway] You got me? I got you. [car door closes] [police siren in distance] Hey. Douglas. You saved me...again. No, you saved all of us. What are you
talking about? Kajay Manitou. [speaking Ojibway] Heal the Earth
and heal each other. We are life. We are love. We do not fear. That's my grandmother's poem. It's not a poem. It's an Ojibway prayer. You were acknowledging
the sanctity of the Earth creature, and I think it...
forgave us. I saw you fall. What? Remember when
you told me that I'm not afraid
of anything? Yeah. Well, that's not true. I've always trusted that
God will take care of me... ...but the vision I saw, that was my fear. And when your hand-- when it-- when it slipped
out of mine... But you didn't let go. If you saw me slipping away, why did you keep holding
my hand? Faith. You see, faith and fear can't survive
in the same place. And there was no way
I was gonna let you go. I'm sorry. Did I-- Did I say
something wrong? No. It's just been
one of those days. Yeah. You know, I--
I don't know if I mentioned, but I'm leaving
the country.
What? Now? In a week, ten days. I'm heading north to work
with an Ojibway Midaywin. I don't suppose you'd
like to come with. You know you could learn
a little bit more about your
grandmother's people, and conditions won't
be very luxurious. And, you know, the weather
will be really challenging. And, you know,
I'm just thinking--
Yes. You don't have a job
here anymore so-- Douglas? What? Yes, Douglas. I'll come with you. Yes? Yes. You know it's gonna
be really cold, and I just thought-- [wheelchair motor whirrs] What are you doing here? [Symes]
I can't do this. You'll do what I tell you. Give it six months
and reopen it. Are you joking? People are dead. We can't just
reopen Cedar Gates. Fine, call it Pine Ridge, or North Country Inn,
whatever. Are you sure
that's wise? Yes, I'm sure. You worry too much. There's nothing
to be afraid of. Are you afraid? Afraid? Afraid of what? [clicking] [grumbles]
Darn thing. [thunderclap] Closed-Captioned By
J.R. Media Services, Inc.
Burbank, CA
I don't give a monkey's nut. Bob back there says
you're digging in his trench, if you catch my drift. And he's on his way here,
so heads up, loverboy. You're a prince, man. Hey.
[slaps pipe] If anyone asks,
I had a doctor's
appointment, okay? [scoffs] [bubbling] [blade slams] Hey, Bob. I didn't see you
climb up in there. [bulldozer engine racing] Hey, it's a good gag,
man, really. [bulldozer engine racing] Uh, hey, you wanna
talk about this? Okay. Cut it out, okay? [whimpering] [engine revs] Hey, look, man, I didn't
know she was your old lady. Come on, please! [engine revs] Damn it! [wire snapping] [grunts] [footsteps approaching] Holy crap! Dude, he is so dead. Who is it? I don't know. We better call someone. I guess. [cell phone beeping] Days without a workplace
injury...zero. Dude, look at his face. [Man]
Thank you very
much for seeing me on such short
notice, Mr. Kent, but I believe
that you will-- you will find this
completely scintillating and-- and quite exciting. [clears throat] Anyway, um... this is the crux
of the problem, you see. If you look at
the population decline in the grgrayy ground
squirrels-- Ground squirrels? We're building a world-class
executive retreat, and you're wasting Mr. Kent's
time with ground squirrels? Mr. Kent, the animal life
at Cedar Gate is disappearing. Um, let's-- Squirrels and rabbits,
field mice. I mean, even the bird
population has dwindled almost overnight, and for no apparent
scientific reason. Now, until we have a chance
to study this further, I strongly suggest
you hold off excavating an extensive
drainage system. I see. So you want me
to lay off 65 men and put a half million dollars
of heavy equipment on blocks because you can't find
enough field mice? Mr. Connelly-- Doctor Connelly. Doctor Connelly. [inhales] Of course. I'm well aware
of your reputation. That's why I hired you. Now you said that the
soil toxicity is minimal. Oh, yes, but-- And apart from one death, and that was
alcohol related, we've had no problem
on the site. Well, now that's not true. You have one big problem. Me. I can't endorse commercial
development at this time. Sit down. Good idea. [wheelchair motor whirrs] Now, you-- You-- Take Doctor Connelly
out of here. This man is
a security risk. Make sure that he never slips
into this building again. I'm a scientist! [motor whirring] Why me? Why do I always get stuck
with the global warming nuts? [thuds] I'm Vicky Valentines
reporting from Channel 6 news. We're here today at the
Clean Planet Concordance where we're hoping
to meet some celeb-- Oh, I believe we
have someone here. Finally.
It's Mikaela. Hi.
Mikaela, you're
a glamorous girl. Why are you
here today? I just have a soft spot
for the environment. I'm just so
happy to be here. [Woman]
Isn't this exciting? Our first conference and it's
the Clean Planet Concordance. God, they're famous! Famous for being
an effete bunch of tree-huggers
and whale-lovers. They should try
doing my job. I doubt any one of us
could manage a hotel. And talk about
multi-tasking. I couldn't imagine a
more challenging job. Well, we like to
think of ourselves as a conference center,
rather than a hotel, but you're right
about the multi-tasking.
Doug Middleton. I'm nominally in charge
of this bunch and they had this dumb idea that anyone who can live off
grubs and tree bark in the Papua New Guinea
highlands can coordinate a conference. That isn't
a dumb idea at all. I'm Kaley Spence, the
events coordinator here. Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you. Oh, this is Aimee,
my assistant. If there's anything you need,
please let me know. You're our first
big conference, and we want to make sure
everything is perfect. Everything
will be perfect. Of course, it will. I have complete faith
in all of you. [cell phone ringing] Symes. There's no
plumbing problem. Help! Shoot, rats, shoot. Don't let her
get me, please. Don't let who get you?
What's the matter? She's lost it. There's smoke coming
out of her ears.
Who? Don't even think about
avoiding me, Eugene Herman! [sighs]
Too late. I am livid. Can you see
how livid I am? I didn't miss
Tyra Banks' birthday to play second
banana to you. Miss Strovsky,
can I help you with something? Yes, hold this. CNN didn't come
all the way out here to photograph some nerdy
Web blogger with bad skin. What idiot made you
keynote speaker? I would be the
idiot in question. Miss Strovsky,
it is my pleasure to meet you, and I am very sorry
about the schedule change. But when I read Eugene's
piece on climate variation, I was so impressed with it. [dog barking] [gasps] Oh, Cleopatra.
[dog whining] Oh, poor baby! Did she hurt you? I-- I didn't know
it was in there. I was bitten when I was
a kid and I've just-- I've been terrified
of dogs ever since. I'm really sorry.
Ignorance is no excuse. [cameras clicking] I'd like you to stop
by my room, Father, to discuss your scheduling. Oh, and by the way,
I love The Thorn Birds. Ah, you forgot-- [fingers snapping] ...your dog.
Thank you, thank you. You saved me from the Wicked
Witch of the Upper West Side. Right, with my
little dog phobia. Well, you're afraid of dogs,
I'm afraid of public speaking. My mother's afraid
of margins. Everybody's afraid
of something. It's okay, Eugene. No one ever died
from public speaking. Found your room yet?
[inhales] Well, everything seems
to be off to a good start. Oh, right. Sorry.
[yips] Oh, yeah. I'll get her dog
back to her. [inhaler rattling] [inhaler hisses softly]
[inhales] We're all going to die! [coughing] We're all going to die! You're gonna die and you. And, oh, we both know
you're gonna die. Unless we do-- unless-- unless-- Where am I? Unless we take immediate action to reverse the damage
we're doing to the envirody-- envirody-- environment, humanity as a species is-- is doomed! Be afraid,
ladies and gentlemen. Be very afraid. [coughing] That wasn't so bad. Kind of liked it. Thanks, tree,
you're always there for me. Oh, oh, perfect. I can just see myself
at the podium, shaking the hands of
a Nobel Prize winning biologist and I smear black goo
all over him. I'm such a loser. Why am I even here? [inhales] [thunderclap] [thunderclap] Hello? Is anybody there? [thunderclap] I think I took a wrong turn. [inhales] [thunderclap] Is anyone else here? [thunderclap]
Hello? [creature snarling] Hello? [thunderclap] [inhales] [thunder rumbling] [creature shrieking] [screaming] Help! Oh, boy. Sheik Abdullah
requires halal meal service. Halal, that's just
like kosher, right?
I guess. Some sort of weird diet plan refrigeration made irrelevant
a million years ago. My sister-in-law
still keeps kosher. Oh. Hey, can you believe
that globe-trotting he-man is a priest? Father Douglas Middleton,
whoa, that's just-- A total waste of man flesh. I was going to say creepy. And Miss Strovsky
with the little dog, is that Mikaela Strovsky from the cover of
Vanity Fair last month? Yes, and interview
with Vogue, one notorious
layout in Hustler. Oh. Why creepy? You haven't had
a, you know, bad experience with
a priest, have you? God, no. I mean, no. They've all been
perfectly lovely. It's just,
I don't know. Priests, nuns, rabbis, they just make me
self-conscious, you know? Like, did I just take
the Lord's name in vain? Are my pants too tight? I'm gonna go break
the news to the chef. They're a little tight. I am way, way too cute
to be out in the wilderness on a stupid conference. Like, environmental
people are really ugly. Is she talking
to herself? And my room is
about this big, and there is no
spa at this hotel. Oh, ah, either that, or she's
having a philosophical debate with her laptop. I'm not sure
which is worse.
Neither am I. But if the dog
answers her back, that might be
pretty entertaining. Say my dinner date
bailed on me tonight. Any chance I can talk
you into joining me? Me? Mm-hmm.
[stammering]
Oh, I don't-- Oh, the food here
is that bad, huh? No, no, it's just that
I have so much to do before the rest
of the guests-- You're not gonna
make me go over there and talk to the dog,
are you? And nobody knows
how to dress. Like, come on. Sure, okay. Thank you. So, who stood you up? My keynote speaker,
and I am crushed. Oh, Eugene.
Mmm. Oh, he's probably
hiding under his bed. Now, don't judge
a book by its cover. He's a brilliant
young man. Eugene's mean green
machine kicks ass-- Environmentally speaking. So, let's go see
what she's doing. And my sheets have
a thread count of about zero!
[huffs] Anyways, everyone knows that
my father funds fifty percent of CPC's annual budget. When Daddy hears that they
snubbed me in favor of a geek, who couldn't even get elected
student body president, OMG, he's absolutely
gonna lose it! [fingers snapping] Waiter, menu now! [sighs]
Everybody's so slow here. She has a video blog,
of course, she does. Sometimes I wonder
about my calling. An all-knowing
and merciful god would never have
created celebutantes. Can you please,
um, get me a menu? And my table is dirty! You're not like any other
priest I've ever met. People keep
telling me that. I hope it's a compliment. It is.
Good. I'm-- I'm sorry.
May I? Oh, my-- my pendant.
Yes. [chuckling]
Sure. It was a gift
from my grandmother. Is she from around here? Yeah, yeah.
How did you know? Well, it's an
Anishinabe artifact. It's typical of the Ojibway
who are indigenous to the area. Wow! You know more
about it than I do. My grandmother was Ojibway. She died when I was young,
and this is all I have of her. Call it superstitious,
but I never take it off. Don't confuse spirituality
with superstition. The Ojibway have
a belief system
that connects all living things to aki-- the Earth. I'm afraid you're talking
to a confirmed agnostic. Really? Mm-hmm.
Well, technically, agnostic means you haven't
made up your mind, so I won't put you down
as a confirmed anything
just yet. Cheers. [glasses clinking] [wind blowing] Good morning. Good morning. I don't suppose you've
seen Eugene this morning,
have you? Not a hair. And I've been up for,
oh, way too long. Have you checked his room? Yeah, yeah,
there's nothing. The door was locked,
of course. It's just dinner last night and then I can't find him
anywhere today, it's just strange.
Yeah. I'll check with security. That'd be great.
[radio beeps] Aimee, can you have Jackson
Deadmarsh meet us at security? Deadmarsh. [bell dings] Jackson Deadmarsh? Well, there can't be
two Jack Deadmarshes. Did he used to be chief
of police in Eugene, Oregon? Yeah, yeah. We're lucky
to have someone with
his qualifications. Do you know him? Sort of. I sued him. The church's freedom
project filed suit on behalf of a young Native
American convicted of murder. The boy insisted
that Deadmarsh had fabricated
evidence against him. Well, that wasn't
on his resume. I'm not surprised. Anyway, it was dropped. Either Deadmarsh was clean,
or he hid his tracks well. What happened
to the convict? Jim Bailey?
He was executed. Ooh. These need to be secured,
so make a note. Jackson! Kaley. I was just saying to Tony
how these side entrances need to have
security locks, so only guests with
key cards can get in. What would we
do without you? You've met father
Douglas Middleton? I know him
by reputation. To what do we owe the
pleasure of this visit? My keynote speaker
is missing. No one's seen him
since last night. We were hoping you
had him on your radar. Eugene Herman, late 20's,
kind of awkward for his age. Yeah, propeller head,
the geek. Nope, I haven't
spotted him. Oh. Can you let us
into his room then? We just want to
make sure he's okay. He's asthmatic. This altitude
is hard for him. Not a problem. Not you, though. This is hotel business. But--
It's-- It's fine, Kaley. I'll go check the library. I've fallen asleep
in the stacks more than once myself. I'll catch up
with you later. Okay. Hey. So you two have history, there's no need to
be rude to a guest. Just doing my job the best way I know how. It's what I've always done. Of course. My job. The best way I know how. Okay. Tony, hold down
the fort, will you? Sure thing, boss. [door closes] [beeping] Mr. Herman? Hotel security. [banging] Eugene? [banging continues] There's someone
in there. Okay. It's-- It's broke. I'm fixing it, I swear. Deadmarsh, you
shoot my apprentice, and I'll make you
clean the crud out of the bathroom drains. Old habits die hard,
you know what I mean? Father Middleton is missing
one of his delegates. Have you see the
guy who stays here? Ain't seen no one no how. Well, did Eugene call
for maintenance himself? Maybe. Everyone and their
mother-in-law's been calling. Mikaela Strovsky's
got us on speed dial. There's some kind of
blockage in the drain system, and I can't find
it to save my life. Well, you keep
at it, Reggie. I have confidence
in you. But if you see him,
give us a call, all right? Sure thing, Kaley. Hank, I can use you in here.
[door closes] And take those damn things out
of your ears before you go deaf. [goo slithering] Look at this!
It's all over me. I can't wash Cleopatra.
I can't wash myself.
[dog whimpering] All that comes out
of the sink is goo. Goo and more goo! Yes, well there must be some
kind of a plumbing problem. You're the conference
coordinator. Shouldn't you be handling
these types of things? See, I don't actually...
work for the hotel.
All my nails are falling off. I'm a guest as you are,
and I'm not much of a plumber. But, you know what?
I will call maintenance for you. [dog barking]
Cleo! Wait! Oh, Mikaela, don't you think
you should get dressed first? Naughty boy. You were looking
at my ta-tas. I thought you
were a priest. I am a priest. I'm not a corpse. [chuckles] You're funny. Have you always
been so funny? My mother thinks so. You like Mikaela,
don't you? You know, I've always had
a thing for men in collars, just all seems so...
naughty. Cleopatra. Your dog? Tell maintenance that
they can retrieve my dog. And I'd like her bathed before
she's returned to my room. Your loss. [door slams] It's never easy. Hola. Bonjour. Buon giorno. I hope you all are
having a beautiful day. Mikaela is having
a terrible day. Cleopatra has run off. I'm distraught. Cleopatra is my life. [zapping] Hippo? Hmm, anyways... Hey, boss,
it's an inhaler. The preacher said
the kid had asthma. Boss. Jeez! Ah, jeez. Look at his face! You look at his face,
I'm going back to the lodge. I've never seen asthma
do that to anyone before. What do you want me to
do with the body, boss? Do you want me to throw
it in the infirmary? Oh, yeah, that'll help. Put him in the
kitchen cooler. Are you joking? Do I look
like I'm joking? The chef will have
a heart attack and then we got two
bodies to worry about. Maybe we should call
the funeral parlor. They can warehouse the body
until we notify the next of kin. What? Funeral parlors, dead bodies,
it all gives me the willies. Ah, tough guy, huh? Look, all I'm asking you to
do is secure a body, okay? Not spend a night in a coffin. Why'd you have to put
that idea in my head? Now I'm not gonna
sleep for a week. You're an ass, Deadmarsh. I'm the ass that
signs your time cards. Look, if you can't
make the call, put the body in the cooler before he gets up and
starts moving around! [dial tone] [phone slams] Isaac found me the
most wonderful outfit to open the Clean
Planet Concordance. Isaac Mizrahi. [gasps] [chuckles] Whew. A word to the wise,
my darlings. If you're going to
drink in the morning, make sure it's
clear beverages only. Vodka, gin, hmm. What else is clear? Water. [faucet squeaks]
[gurgles] Ugh. Ick and more ick. [gasps] [goo slithering] Very funny! [screaming] [screams] [goo dripping] Stop it!
Stop it! [goo dripping, bubbling] [heavy breathing] [crash] [thunderclap]
[zap] No. [thunderclap]
[zap] [screaming] [panting] Not me. Not me. [screaming] [snarling] Kaley! It's okay, it's okay. [speaking Ojibway] Housekeeping, hello? Housekeeping. Kaley? Kaley! This is an
exclusive property. We can't have
dead people here. This is very bad for us. No good for Eugene,
either. What was that? Eugene, he was
a good kid. Super shy, terrified
of public speaking. It's a horrible way to die,
don't you think? Hello? Housekeeping. [screaming] Earth to Kaley.
Can you empathize with me
for 10 seconds here, please? This is our
first conference. I don't want it
to be our last. We can't afford for
anything to go wrong. [screaming] [phone ringing] Events, Kaley speaking. What? This is great. This is just...great. I didn't do anything.
I didn't touch her. Of course you didn't, Manuela. She obviously
committed suicide. Poor girl must have
been very unhappy. Unhappy about what? Her father is
rich as Croesus. She was famous
just for being famous. She's got
everything she wants. Well, maybe when you
have everything, you're afraid of
losing everything. Probably drugs. This is exactly
how you found it? I didn't touch anything. Okay, well I'll tell
the police that, but they may still
want to talk to you. Miss Kaley, can I go? I feel ill. I'll call you if
I need you, okay. [cell phone beep] Are you crazy? We have to file
a police report. We don't need to
file it right now. She killed herself. What difference are
the police going to make? Well, what do you
want me to do? Call our cop-- Deadmarsh. He can stash her
with asthma boy. And, uh, get Reggie
to replace that mirror. Kaley, how's my favorite
events coordinator? It's Alvin Symes, Mr. Kent. Good to hear your voice. Big week, huh? Mr. Kent, there have been
some unfortunate developments. One of the conference delegates
was found dead this morning from an apparent
asthma attack. And just now-- Now what?
Spit it out, Symes. Mikaela Strovsky
slit her wrists. Who? Wait. Leon Strovsky's kid? I'm afraid so. What the hell is
wrong with you? How could you
let this happen? Her, of all people? It wasn't my fault.
I promise you. I did everything to make
opening week perfect, detail perfect. Has the press got
wind of this yet? The only ones who
know are the maid who found the
body and Kaley. She wants to call
the police. No frickn' way. That's what
I told her, but-- If this goes wide, the only conferences
we'll get at Cedar Gates will be celebrity death tours. Do you want to
operate a shuttle bus? No, sir. Well, keep it under wraps until P.R. puts
the right spin on it. You can do that much,
can't you? What do you want me
to tell the staff? You tell them, anybody opens their mouth, and they're out of a job. And Alvin, that includes you. Reggie? Are you down here? Reggie? Reggie? [video game on TV] Reggie? [scream]
[sinister laughter] Jeez, Hank. What a mess. Reggie? [sinister laughter] Reggie. Reggie? [gasps] It's just a little dog, Kaley. It's okay. Cleopatra? [dog whining] [whistling] Come here. [whistling] [dog whimpers] [whistling] [thunderclap]
[growling] No. No. [growling] [thunderclap] [scream] [heavy breathing] [thunder rumbles] [gasps] [thunderclap] [thunderclap] [growling] [thunderclap] [growling] No. No. [snarling] [thunderclap] [growling] [growling] [scream] Where did it go? Where did what go? The dog,
the wolf-dog. Is it hiding? Kaley, there is no dog. How did you get here? You were calling
for help.
I was? Yeah. I don't remember. Thank you. Ah, it's all right. There's nothing
to be afraid of. Just 'cause
you're not afraid doesn't mean there's
nothing to be afraid of. I think I just
found your dog. [speaking Ojibway] Great Spirit,
teach us to love, to heal the Earth
and each other. I am life, I am love,
and I do not fear. Here, drink this. It's non-caffeinated. Thanks. There was no wolf. My men searched the basement. There was no wolf, only just Mikaela
Strovsky's poodle, and she was in no shape
to chase anything. It's a papillon. Whatever. Oh, we never did find a
suicide note in her room. Is that important? Is it suspicious? Not all suicides
leave notes. But a camera hog
like Mikaela... I can't imagine her not
wanting to have the last word. It wasn't really a wolf. It was a cross-breed-- half wolf,
half German Shepherd. How do you know? Because I remember it. It was our neighbor's dog,
from when we were kids. So evil. The dog or the neighbor? Both. Father Fitch
and his wolf-dog, Ajax. We used to play in the ruins
of his old chapel. He caught us
fooling around once and he sic'd Ajax on us. He bit me so bad,
he put me in the hospital. I've been terrified of dogs
my whole life because of it. That was the animal
that attacked you today? Yeah. [laughing] That was 20 years ago. Maybe you just got a few
of your facts mixed up. It's not the kind
of thing you forget. [sinister laughter] [video game continues] Hank? Hank? Rot in hell,
Sister Mary Augusta. [video game gunshots] Off your duff, Hank.
We got work. Buzzkill! I was five seconds away from breaking
my lifetime high score
in House of the Dead. Yeah, yeah, by pretending
the zombies are your teachers from Catholic
elementary school. Those are some
scary nuns, man. Hey, everyone
needs motivation. What are the moon suits for? We got to go
down in the sewer. The drains are plugged
worse than ever. Guests are checking out, and Symes is
having palpitations. Symes can rot in hell. Hmm. Guests are checking out
'cause the damn building's got a death curse on it. Hank! You know, any time I doubt
the existence of God, all it takes is one look
at a view like this to convince me. You mean you don't
always believe in God? Isn't that a basic
job requirement? Sorry. This is weird. What's weird? Talking to a priest
about his vocation, or talking to a priest
like he's a regular guy? [chuckles]
Both. See, my calling is about
more than belief. It's about faith, which some people define
as belief without evidence. For instance, everyone here says
there's no trace of your wolf
in the basement. But, I believe you saw
what you say you saw. You do? I do. Well, I wish somebody
else believed. I've got Symes that's
this close to firing me. I'm losing the
confidence of my staff. And with two mysterious deaths,
your delegates are suddenly remembering they have
pressing business in Beijing. It's been a very strange
last few days, hasn't it? Yeah. Come on, walk with me. So when did you decide you
wanted to be a priest? Ah, I was called to
service when I was 13. How does a 13-year-old boy
think that God is calling him? It's funny, I never wondered
about that for a minute. I always wondered
why God called me. I'm serious. So am I. It's not like wanting
to be an astronaut, or a firefighter. How do you know at 13 you're not gonna want
to get married, or have kids,
or have-- [laughing] I'm, I'm not a
Catholic priest. I'm Episcopalian. What? We get married,
we have children, and we can even hold hands
at the movie theater. Oh. So then why aren't you... Married?
Yeah. I travel a lot. I'm devoted to my mission. I just haven't found
the right gal. Oh. Or maybe I'm afraid
of commitment. So in other words,
you're a typical man. Get out before
it's too late! Whoa, wait. Who was that? Let's go find out. Come on, come on. [chain clanging] Watch it. Who needs video games? This is real-life Tomb Raider. Yeah, or Doom. I hate my job. What the hell? What? We're in a sewer, we should be in muck
and water up to our knees. It's almost dry. And that's bad?
Hell, yeah. It means there's an
obstruction all right, and it's freakin' huge. Okay. I'm gonna
go get some help. Hey, easy, cowboy. First, we find
the blockage, then once we know
what we're up against, we get some help. You can take off
your respirator. There's no toxic gas
or nothing. [explosion in distance]
What was that? [breathing] Methane gas pocket. I thought you said there
was no toxic gas down here. Methane ain't toxic,
just flammable. Terrific. [water sloshing underfoot] Reg, I'm tired. This stuff weighs a ton. Do I have to wear it? You can walk around naked
for all I care. [door creaking] [whistles] Hey! It ain't lunchtime yet. Yeah, yeah. [goo dripping] What the hell? [gasps] Reg, what is this? [banging] Did you find anything? [banging] [grunts] Reg? [heavy breathing] Reggie? [sinister laughter] [screaming] [doorknob rattling] [shrieking in distance] [screaming] [screaming] [thunderclap] [moaning in distance] Hello? [moaning] Hello? [moaning] Oh, no! [thunderclap] Hank? Hank, where are you? [gasps] Reggie! Hank! [shouting] Reggie! I'm coming! [zombies groaning] [screaming] [screaming] [whimpering] Hank! No! No! No, Hank! [screaming] [zombies groaning] Hank, what are you doing? [screaming] [zombies groaning] [screaming] How did he disappear
so fast? I don't know. What's this? It's an old shed from
when all they had up here
were summer cabins. Well, it looks like
they're still using it. Been no one up
for years. Really? Then why is there
a brand-new padlock
on the door? [thunder rolling] Hold on. Okay. I didn't know they taught
breaking and entering at Divinity school. Ha, temptation is
everywhere, my dear, you just have to know
when to use it for good. Right. Move. They didn't
teach me that. After you. It's bigger
than it looks. This place is amazing. What the hell
is all this? Don't touch it!
[scream] Don't you know a sterile
workplace when you see one? Some people, jeez! Sorry, Father. You know who I am? Father Douglas Middleton,
the crusading priest. Everyone knows you. Besides, we were
at a conference
together in Tokyo. You spoke on
renewable energy. I did soil erosion. I'm always stuck
with soil erosion. You're Walter Connelly,
the biologist. What do you want,
a gold star? Catch up. We don't have
much time. You said that already. How did you get here? And how long have
you been here? Why don't you tell me
about your misadventure
in the basement? You know about that? Can we just stipulate
that I ask and you answer? The basement--
What happened? There was a dog. Half wolf, half dog,
and I recognized it. Before that. What happened before
you saw the dog? Nothing. I was on my way
to the maintenance office. You didn't touch anything? Come into contact
with anything strange? Ah, now that you mention it, something dripped on me
from an overhead pipe, something dark and sticky. I mean it wasn't oil
exactly, or tar, but... Was this what
dripped on you? It looks like it. What is that? Now that's the same stuff that Mikaela
had smeared on her. And a guy,
Eugene Herman. Then it touched
Dutch on the leg. Dutch? Who's Dutch? You heard about
the construction worker that died here, right? That was Dutch. It was right after
that that I moved in, to answer your question. I think I drove? Did I take a bus? Maybe I jogged. Was there a ferry involved? Your wolf, Mikaela's suicide,
Eugene's asthma attack, they're all
connected to this. Ah, stand back. All right, come on. Ah, that way. And whatever you do... ...don't touch. It's moving. Of course, it's moving. It's alive. What? Ladies and gentlemen,
you are looking at a highly intelligent
sentient life form. An entirely new species. I was hoping for some
kind of an audience. Applause? Awkward. Here, look at this. [beeping] Well, that's the sewer system
under the conference center. Exactly. My theory is that the creature
has a hive mind, like bees or ants, and that when its extremities
were attacked by the sewer excavation-- Wait a minute.
No one attacked it. Yeah, but it doesn't
know that, does it? It's like if you accidentally
step on an ant colony, then all the ants will
all gather and they'll attack. Look at this thing,
it's growing. It is, indeed. Feeling attacked,
the creature regrouped. The rate of growth
is logarithmic. What are all
these dense areas? It's building dams,
a network of them,
all through the system, all in communication
with one another. That explains your
plumbing problem.
Yeah. This is remarkable. How big is this
thing gonna get? I have no idea. It might encompass the
entire mountain range. Maybe all of
North America. This could be the largest
creature on Earth! Well, then we'd
better find out. If we're gonna
fight this thing, we have to know what
we're up against. [groans] This is why I never
leave the lab. Why is it that human beings
always default to warfare. And you, a priest! This thing is killing
people, Connelly. Well, we can
communicate with it, we can find out
what it wants! I know what it wants. It wants us dead. Oh, that's so clich. Word to the wise,
my darlings. If you're going to
drink in the morning, make sure it's
clear beverages only. Vodka, gin, hmm. What else is clear? Water. [heavy breathing] [crash] [heavy breathing] Ah! Oh! Look, don't tell me
to call maintenance. I did call maintenance.
There is no one in maintenance. Oh, oh, yeah?
Well, you're fired. Mr. Symes?
What do you want? The problems
that we're having with the plumbing
might be part of a larger issue
that may be dangerous. Dangerous? Where did
you get that from? Walter Connelly,
the biologist. He's been studying the
underground ecosystem. Connelly!
That nutcase? He's been trying to shut
us down since day one. That man was put on
Earth to irritate me. Listen, if we
don't act fast, these guests are going to
start to evacuate themselves. Get Reggie down in
that damn sewer. I've already
told him twice. And if you can't do that,
you're fired! No, no,
you listen to me. No, I'm afraid you
don't understand. No, I'm afraid-- [squish] Oh, damn it! [phone clatters] Aimee, what's wrong? What isn't wrong? Eugene is dead.
Mikaela's dead. Symes keeps calling
every five minutes asking, "Where's Reggie?" You leave me here alone.
It's okay. I don't know how
to make conversation with Nobel Prize
winning physicists. And now, the toilets
are blocked up and I don't
know what to do. It's okay.
I'm here now. Now tell me,
where was Reggie the last anyone
heard from him? The sewer. The sewer. He actually went
into the sewer? Yeah. Him and Hank both. Symes said that
they better find out what's blocking up
the drains or else. This can't go
on any longer. Call the staff. We're evacuating
the facility. Evacuating?
Yes. Symes will have kittens. Screw that tight-ass
little bootlick. Something bad is
going on around here. And whatever it is,
it's getting worse. Now, get everyone out now! What do you want me
to say to them? Tell them we're closed
for repairs. Tell them the conference
is cancelled, and tell them to follow you
because you're leaving, too. I'm not going anywhere
if you're not. Aimee, I need you gone. Please, for me. [gurgling] [gurgling] Okay. Not for nothing, boss, But Reggie and Hank
went down the sewer, they never came back. I'm just saying is all. That's exactly why
we're going in. That's disgusting.
Don't touch it! I don't know what it is, but it's killing people. Whatever is happening
up there, it's connected
to something down here. Okay, let's get it
before it gets us. [click] What was that? Combustible gases. The place is probably
full of this stuff. Come on. Good. Check that end. [gun cocks] [banging, clattering
in distance] You. It is you. I knew it was you. Symes... what are you doing
down here? Me? You're the one sabotaging
my grand opening. [laughs] Who did you sell
me out to, huh? Careful, sir. Oh, here's your buddy. I never wanted to
hire you, you know. Once a crooked cop,
always a crooked cop. Put down the gun, sir. But you came cheap. It's always about
the bottom line, right? Symes, there's
something down here and it got Reggie. That lazy bastard, he's just hiding out
somewhere. I'm warning you! Jack, are you afraid? What? Are you afraid, Jack? [body thuds] He was-- He was
gonna kill you. It's all right, kid. You couldn't help it. Thanks. Come on. Kid! [explosion]
Kid, come on! [explosion] Tony, hurry up! [footsteps approaching] [explosion] [explosion] Boss! Tony? [screams, grunts in distance] Kid? [grunts] [explosion] [explosion] [explosion] Ah, kid. [footsteps approaching]
[explosion] Stop or I'll shoot! Relax. It's just
a rent-a-cop. Jackson, it's all
right, it's us.
Put the gun down! Put the light down! Testy. I don't bite...
yet, gee. Are you okay? Don't worry about me. I can take care
of myself. But you're down
here alone? No, I came down with Tony. He's dead.
What? Symes is dead, too. How the hell did
you get down here? Oh, everything's connected
to everything down here. The padre and I came down
a transverse back that way, she caught up with us. Scared the living Jes--
Sorry, Father-- Scared the living crap
out of me, I tell you what. Who is this lunatic? Chief of Police Deadmarsh,
Meet Dr. Connelly. He's been studying the new
life form that's taken hold down here in the sewer.
Does he know
his new life form's already killed four people? Actually, it's five. I warned the developers
that this new drainage system runs right down her throat. Her? What?
What, it's a female? I like to think
of it that way.
Oh, great! He's got a crush
on the thing! Hey, it's a massive fluid,
multi-celled entity, whose separate parts
can move independently, or reticulate into
a single network. What's not to love? We think it emits an organic
hallucinogen of some kind. Even a drop of this
black slime on your skin, and a chemical gets
in your bloodstream and creates
a violent psychosis. Think octopus,
think skunk, think-- Think rationally! [explosion] Eugene died of
an asthma attack. Exactly. The chemical elicits
our deepest fears and manifest them. In Eugene's case, he was afraid of choking up
at the podium. He externalized that fear
by choking to death. And I saw myself being
attacked by my worst fear-- a wolf-dog. But you didn't die. Doug-- Father Middleton,
he got to me in time. So, Mikaela saw something
in her mirror that-- that frightened her badly
and-- and what? Symes was a victim
of his own paranoia? Each of them touched
the creature, or were touched by it. I know.
I can't wait to publish! Dial it back, doc. First, let's see if we
can get out of here alive. More importantly,
see if we can find a way to stop this creature
from killing again. I've been down here-- [explosion]
...whoa, dozens of times. There's a transverse pipe about a quarter mile along that leads out
to the water tank. [explosion] Look out!
[screams] [explosion]
Oh, my God. Thanks. Yeah. [explosion] Oh, crap. You don't want
to see this. Don't want to see what? [screams] [screams] Reggie. Reggie. I am the resurrection and
the life, sayeth the Lord. He that believeth in me
though he were dead, yet shall he live.
Amen. Amen. What good does that
mumbo jumbo do Reggie now? Maybe nothing.
Maybe it's for us. It's the mumbo jumbo,
the old words,
they connect us. Much like the woods
carved right here, connect you to
your grandmother. [rumbling] Let's get out of here. Wait! Wait!
What? Do you hear something? [water sloshing] Oh, boy. Oh, my God. That's bad. She's building a dam right in front of our eyes. She's sealing us in,
you idiot. Come on! [explosion]
Yeah. [explosion] This tunnel leads
to the silo. Cut across the bridge
and out. [klaxon blaring] It's huge. The developers
aren't finished here. They're gonna turn
Cedar Gate into a city. Now you know why she
feels so threatened. Where's Jackson? [klaxon continues] [explosion] Jackson? Jackson!
Deadmarsh! Jackson,
what are you doing? You keep going. I'll try to slow it down. Kaley. That's suicide.
Don't do this. Deadmarsh! Deadmarsh, you don't
have anything to prove! [explosion] You want to bet? [rumbling] Anyway, it's too late for me. I got nailed hours ago. Be the preacher.
Get the flock out of here. Jackson,
I was wrong about you. Jackson? [chuckles]
No, you weren't. Come on, baby.
Follow me. Jackson! [explosion] Jackson!
We have to go!
Come on! [fire crackling] She's beautiful. We have to get
across that bridge, it's the only way out. [screams] What are you doing? Connelly,
get off the bridge! I have to talk to her. She's beautiful. You don't know
anything about it, except that it's dangerous. Connelly, just come back. She's a sentient creature. We need to respect
her right to exist! We need to find
another way out of here! She deserves respect! She deserves respect. [screams] [screams]
No! Grab my hand. Grab my hand! [rumbling] Grab my hand. No! [zapping] Come on, you bitch! [explosion] Hey!
[clicking] Officer Deadman!
[clicking] What's up?
[clicking] I sure could use a light. [clicking] Bailey. [laughing]
[clicking] You knew I'd come back,
didn't you? Let's just say
I'm not real surprised. [explosion] You framed me,
you bastard. You planted evidence,
and I was innocent. You didn't kill
Tim Jefferson, doesn't mean
you were innocent. What about
Olivia Red Bear? [explosion] I wasn't charged
with rape, dumb ass. [explosion] I was on trial
for murder. [explosion] And you lied
under oath. That's right,
Bailey, I did. What's the punishment
going to be? What do you think? We both rot in hell? After you. [click]
[zapping] [screaming] [metal clanking] [screaming] Don't let me go!
Just hang on to me! [screaming] Hang onto me! Please, don't let me go!
I'm not gonna let you go! [screams] [creature chittering] No!
Kaley! [screams] No! Kaley! Kaley! [screaming] [zapping] [gasps] Don't let me go! [speaking Ojibway] [speaking Ojibway] [speaking Ojibway] [Woman speaking Ojibway] You got me? I got you. [car door closes] [police siren in distance] Hey. Douglas. You saved me...again. No, you saved all of us. What are you
talking about? Kajay Manitou. [speaking Ojibway] Heal the Earth
and heal each other. We are life. We are love. We do not fear. That's my grandmother's poem. It's not a poem. It's an Ojibway prayer. You were acknowledging
the sanctity of the Earth creature, and I think it...
forgave us. I saw you fall. What? Remember when
you told me that I'm not afraid
of anything? Yeah. Well, that's not true. I've always trusted that
God will take care of me... ...but the vision I saw, that was my fear. And when your hand-- when it-- when it slipped
out of mine... But you didn't let go. If you saw me slipping away, why did you keep holding
my hand? Faith. You see, faith and fear can't survive
in the same place. And there was no way
I was gonna let you go. I'm sorry. Did I-- Did I say
something wrong? No. It's just been
one of those days. Yeah. You know, I--
I don't know if I mentioned, but I'm leaving
the country.
What? Now? In a week, ten days. I'm heading north to work
with an Ojibway Midaywin. I don't suppose you'd
like to come with. You know you could learn
a little bit more about your
grandmother's people, and conditions won't
be very luxurious. And, you know, the weather
will be really challenging. And, you know,
I'm just thinking--
Yes. You don't have a job
here anymore so-- Douglas? What? Yes, Douglas. I'll come with you. Yes? Yes. You know it's gonna
be really cold, and I just thought-- [wheelchair motor whirrs] What are you doing here? [Symes]
I can't do this. You'll do what I tell you. Give it six months
and reopen it. Are you joking? People are dead. We can't just
reopen Cedar Gates. Fine, call it Pine Ridge, or North Country Inn,
whatever. Are you sure
that's wise? Yes, I'm sure. You worry too much. There's nothing
to be afraid of. Are you afraid? Afraid? Afraid of what? [clicking] [grumbles]
Darn thing. [thunderclap] Closed-Captioned By
J.R. Media Services, Inc.
Burbank, CA