Spy Kids: Armageddon (2023) Movie Script

(triumphant music playing)
(gentle music playing)
(rock music playing)
(dramatic music playing)
(clicking, whooshing)
(gruff voice) Armageddon will launch
in one minute.
(girl) Tony, how are we gonna
do this in time?
- We need to get across that gap.
- But we'll be spotted by the guards.
- We won't make it.
- Can you just trust me?
Honestly? No, I can't trust you.
Well, we're going anyway.
Activate Magna Boots.
(boots bleep and whir)
(mechanical stomping)
- (Tony) Look out. Guards.
- (girl) Sh!
(dramatic music intensifies)
- I need eyes in the hall.
- On it.
Bronson, surveillance mode.
Tony, we gotta hurry!
Locked out. Again.
This is where
we're supposed to complete the mission!
If we get to this elevator,
we can stop the countdown.
Tony, the world as we know it
ends in 15 seconds.
(gruff voice)
You will never stop Armageddon.
Run to the elevator.
(device buzzes)
Do it again!
(girl exhales)
I think you were right, Patty.
About what?
We're not gonna make it.
- (clunking)
- (both scream)
(dramatic music swells)
(music fades)
(echoing drumbeat)
(suspenseful music playing)
(mellow Latin music playing)
Rat Thickskull, don't let me down.
You know, back in my day,
a card up the sleeve was called cheating.
Morning, Dad.
I'm learning a new magic trick.
Oh, is that right?
I never cheat.
I use creative sportsmanship.
(giggles) Oh, that's very clever.
Where'd you get that term?
- From you.
- (gasps)
From me?! Oh, no, no. That's impossible.
Deception is not a part of my vocabulary.
(clicks tongue)
Don't you like your overnight oats?
(Patty) Mmm
Blame your dad.
Uh, excuse me. What's going on here?
Computers, games, devices are
only allowed between 4:00 and 6:00 p.m.
- We know this.
- She just needs it for a minute.
I'm looking for an animal photo
to make my science paper look extra nice.
Oh, well, as long as it's for schoolwork,
then I guess it's okay.
As soon as she's done, we lock that up,
and then please meet me in our office.
Aw, look at that cute little starfish.
(Patty) Boop.
I need your permission to download it.
Mm-hmm. I'm very impressed
with how honest you are, sweetheart.
Yep. I always wanna be super honest.
Just like you.
Switchsies. Thank you, my love.
- Morning, Mom.
- Hey.
- Games?
- I gotta practice for tonight.
Do you wanna get busted?
Nobody catches Rat.
- Stop talking like Rat Thickskull.
- Someday, I'm gonna be Rat Thickskull.
(device buzzes, beeps)
- (fingers crack)
- All right.
Authorizing Armageddon Code.
Syncing Armageddon Code.
And Armageddon Code sunk.
Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! Come here.
Hey. (chuckles) What?
Happy anniversary.
Operation Fireball?
(both) Pssch!
How could I forget
our greatest mission yet?
- (beeping)
- Oh, oh, oh, oh. Mm.
- You did remember.
- Well, my watch did anyway.
We also promised
that it was this anniversary
we were finally gonna tell our kids
that we're spies.
- Remember?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, we did.
I say we go in and say, "Tonight,
we're gonna have an important talk."
- And I'm gonna take the lead on that.
- Oh no. N I know what you're doing.
- Trying to dance your way out of this one.
- I would never!
How dare you tango with me!
(mom) You know I love it
when you dance with me.
- Let's go talk to the kids.
- Okay.
- Antonio.
- Hi.
Oh good. It's locked. Just making sure.
You know better than to fry your brain
with video games before school.
For breaking the rules
and stealing my key,
you will have no access to any tech
of any kind for the rest of the week.
Okay. Now tell them.
(mom) Hmm.
Onward to the house of learning!
- Nice leading.
- We can tell 'em next year.
- We've said that since they were four.
- (dad) Here we go!
Tony keeps getting around
our restrictions,
so we have to ban all of their technology.
They need time
to enjoy the things they love.
Babe, we can't risk
someone breaking into our system
through our kids' devices, okay?
There are spies everywhere.
(funky music playing)
(device whirs)
Agent Torrez. Agent Tango.
Morning, Devlin.
So what's the mission for today?
An unknown group has infiltrated one
of the top secret server rooms of the OSS
hidden deep inside a civilian office.
These guys look like professionals.
Mm. We'll pay them a visit.
(suspenseful music playing)
You know, because of our rules,
at least Patty is very honest.
Our restrictions make them
do what is right,
so if we ban all of their tech,
maybe they should behave even better.
Look, all I'm saying is
technology isn't doing them any favors.
Know what I mean?
- (beeps)
- Someone's locked us out.
(sinister music playing)
- Well, technology sure serves us well.
- Hmm.
(playful Latin music playing)
Okay. The most optimal path
of capturing them all effectively is
is not that.
- You don't think so?
- Don't be a bull in a china shop.
(device bangs, fizzes)
(blows landing)
You know, we could have planned that
just a little, babe.
Maybe ask one of these guys
what the passcode is or something.
You think too much.
It's very cute though. Okay. (strains)
You know,
we can't just control our children.
We gotta let them fail.
You know? A lot. Like we did.
Through real-life experiences, absolutely,
but not through their technology.
I mean, video games
are never a real challenge.
Wait, what's this?
- "Defeat the Heck Knight to gain access."
- This should be easy for you.
(game character whooshing)
Ha. Oh.
Ooh. Ouch.
Well, he cheated,
and two can play at that game.
(watch bleeps)
Armageddon really does
break into anything.
This is odd.
These guys
weren't actually searching for anything,
so what are they doing here?
Oh, I count four intruders.
There was a fifth. That big one.
- (tense music playing)
- (creaking)
Oh! Oh-ho! Oh!
(gruff voice) Armageddon is mine to claim.
- It was a trap.
- Huh?
It was a trap.
They're after the Armageddon Code.
- No.
- Come on.
(Heck Knight growls)
(bystanders scream)
Oh, he's gone.
It's okay.
Armageddon isn't stored on the watch.
Mom. You missed it.
There was a Heck Knight. From Hyskor!
(kid's mom) Sweetie, wait up.
Wait a minute.
What's Hyskor?
(host) This is the final round
of our trading-card tournament.
The winner will receive
a free copy of Hyskor,
which, of course, is the sequel
to the megahit video game Loskor.
Players, are you ready?
(host) Let's play.
Lowest number wins.
Beat that.
Oh no.
Or, as Rat Thickskull would say,
"Tough tacos, kid."
I'm impressed.
Congratulations, Tony.
Type in your email and Hyskor will be sent
to your home computer.
Did you know the creator of Hyskor
is this crazy awesome rich guy
named Rey Kingston,
but everyone calls him
by his gamer name, the King.
Check it out.
(narrator) And here is Rey Kingston
to talk about how he does it.
My latest game, Hyskor,
is made using
my new, flawless design method.
That's a glitch right there.
But, using my proprietary
(computerized voice) VR pods.
I'm able to design and improve the game
from the inside.
- With my mind.
- (bleeping)
(The King) I can make my game better
so it can make you better.
Will you look at that?
- Better than ever!
- (kids) Whoa!
And when you apply game theory,
you can fix anything.
(kids laugh)
Do you think the game will have
the mythical One Hit from Loskor?
No. One Hit is a fable.
No, it isn't. Leebs and I
were fighting a cheating player,
and I ran out of health,
but then I got a gold star,
came back to life,
and beat the player with One Hit.
That's impossible, Patty.
Hyskor's releasing at midnight,
and I'm gonna play it all night long.
My parents would never let me
stay up that late.
We're not allowed
to stay up late playing games.
You'll never make it past
Mom and Dad's restrictions.
Not without your help.
- You shouldn't have cheated.
- But I won, didn't I?
There's a better way to win.
But I got Hyskor.
I know you wanna play too.
(ominous music playing)
(Heck Knight growls)
(The King) The world is full
of terrible, unfair people,
but, with the Armageddon Code,
I can force them all to become good.
(Heck Knight) We were unable
to trace the Armageddon Code
through the agent's watch.
But I've learned what I needed.
The Torrezes have the code.
Since it wasn't in the OSS,
it must be at their home.
(Heck Knight) I will invade their home
and claim the code for you.
No need.
The Torrezes just won a copy of Hyskor.
Tonight, I'll claim the code myself.
(music builds, fades)
(floorboards creak)
Wha It's It's a brand-new house.
Why are the floors squeaking?!
(Torrez) We picked this place
for how it looks, not how it sounds.
No way this is gonna work.
Five minutes to midnight. Let's move.
- (creaking)
- (inhales sharply)
How are we getting past
the squeaky wood floor?
I tried mapping where all the squeaks are
so that we can sneak past
Mom and Dad's office
and get to the game room.
But one creak and we're goners.
- Wait for me!
- Sh!
(Patty) One, two, three!
I feel like a spy.
The worst spy ever. You talk too loud.
- (creaking)
- (inhales sharply)
- (creaking)
- (inhales sharply) Sh!
- Your map is wrong!
- It's not wrong.
- (Patty) Here, give me that.
- (both gasp)
(frantic music playing)
(music fades)
(Tony) Worst spy ever.
- (Patty) Worst idea ever.
- (TVs chime)
We're gonna get so busted.
(Tony) Dad changes his passcode every day.
- What now?
- I found this in his desk earlier.
(Patty) You have no soul.
Hyskor's downloading. Now we wait.
We are dealing with
a highly intelligent enemy
who knows about the Armageddon Code.
It's time we consider deleting it.
Out of the question.
The code can break into any device
on the planet.
Yes. Yes. He's right, babe.
Think of the times we've used it
to save the world.
This is our greatest tool.
It's also the world's greatest threat.
If there was the slightest chance
of someone taking it,
we agreed we would erase it.
Your orders are to protect the code
until we find a solution. No exceptions.
What? He's right.
Do not look at me like that.
Or like that.
That's not so bad.
Download complete. Get ready
for the ultimate game experience.
What if using Dad's passcode
opens up some kind of reverse access
where someone can break into our system?
Do you wanna play or not?
One button-press away.
(whispers) We'll be in so much trouble.
Worth it.
- Okay, do it. Wait. Don't do it.
- (game music playing)
(game) Welcome to Hyskor.
Reach the end of the world
and defeat the last player standing
to win the crown.
- Choose your character.
- I pick Florella.
- You're playing her still?
- But she's so cool.
She gets better
as you work through the game.
- I would've won by then.
- With Rat Thickskull?
Good luck. He's a jerk.
No. He's the most ruthless, scheming,
roguish rascal in the whole game.
And no one plays him better than I do.
Okay, we, uh We
- We move the code. We hide it.
- It's a threat no matter where we hide it.
It's always been that way,
ever since you created it.
- We need to delete it now, Terrence.
- No. N
No, we just keep all home devices
locked under maximum security.
Ours, the kids'.
People are always
going to be after the code.
So you wanna just lock up
our kids' lives forever?
(suspicious music playing)
(Terrence) Babe. Uh
I'm sorry. Just We We
- We have to do this, you know?
- Mm.
It's better for them, for all of us.
- Oh.
- Mm.
- Thank you for understanding.
- Mm-hmm.
Did you just sleeper-kiss me?
- (snores)
- (devices bleeps)
I'm sorry, babe.
But this is better for all of us.
Proceed with deletion of Armageddon Code.
I'm gonna beat this game so fast.
The King said
that only good people can beat his games.
- I am good.
- That's not what I meant.
(Patty) If you cheat like a rat,
you will lose like a rat.
For real.
- (game music distorts)
- Uh
(Patty) There's something wrong
with this game.
I know that face.
Thank you.
(Tony) I know that voice.
What's he doing?
(whirs, zaps)
Wait, what?
What? It just shut down.
We should leave.
I agree.
(high-pitched trill)
- Wait, how did
- (high-pitched trill)
- Armageddon Code is gone?
- Deleted.
Good. It should have been done a lo...
Not deleted.
- What?
- Right out from under us.
(chilling music playing)
(Terrence) It's not erased,
and it's not here.
- (Torrez) You're not looking hard enough.
- (Terrence) Maybe the kids did something.
(Torrez) Why are you always
blaming the kids? They are very obedient.
Have you met our son?
(Torrez) Yes!
And they are asleep in their beds.
- I saw it with my own eyes.
- (Terrence) I'm gonna check.
- (Torrez) Oh, are you?
- (Terrence) Yeah!
That can't be our fault.
Maybe someone stole his credit card
or something.
We should go to bed.
But what if we did something bad?
Worth it.
- (alarm ringing)
- Wake up, sleepyhead!
Wake up!
Something is happening.
It's all over the world.
- (whirs)
- (game narrator) Hyskor challenge.
- Survive the perilous jump to gain access.
- What is this, a game?
- (character screams)
- (narrator) Access denied.
That's Hyskor, Dad.
A game. But I can beat it.
(mysterious music playing)
- (narrator) Access granted.
- Good job, bud.
Oh, the news is back on.
As of early this morning,
large populations of the world
are suddenly being forced to play games
to gain access to their daily life.
Reports show people are being locked in
or out of their smart cars, smart homes,
and they have to complete
fantasy game tasks
to unlock even the simplest device.
I'm trying to get into my bank account,
but I have to fight this Heck Knight.
I don't know
what the heck a Heck Knight is.
(reporter) What's going on over here?
- We can't beat the game.
- That's my friend Leebs!
-(game narrator) Access denied.
- Now we're locked out of our home.
(reporter) Half of the planet
has been affected by this virus,
and experts agree that if it goes global,
the world as we know it could end.
It's like somebody combined
a video-game virus with...
The Armageddon Code.
(electrical hum)
- I think someone's trying to break in.
- Come here.
- (lock clicks)
- (electrical thunk, hum)
- Someone else is in control.
- (grunting)
- (kids scream)
- Go to the corner!
(dramatic music playing)
These are all enemies from Hyskor.
(Tony) Dad and Mom are actually cool!
Tony, play Hyskor to open the lock.
No, you do it. I'm watching this.
Dad, don't fight that guy.
He's one of the toughest in the game!
That's my TV!
Yes. I beat the game!
- You okay, baby?
- I had it under control.
- Come on, go!
- (Terrence) Go, go, go!
(ominous music playing)
- What are these things?
- Bad guys from our favorite video game.
(Terrence) That doesn't explain
the living skeletons in my pool.
- Car. Ah!
- No, no, no, no.
- That's my car!
- Safe house, safe house.
(Torrez) Right, right. Let's go. Go on.
(Patty) But I liked that car!
- (Tony) We'll get another one.
- (glass shattering)
- Where are we going?
- (Torrez) Follow your dad.
All right, listen.
Kids, your mother and I are, uh
Your dad and I have special jobs.
You're about to see
some mind-blowing technology
that might surprise you.
(Patty) That's a wall.
Why isn't the secret door working?
Oh, no power.
(Tony) Is this a dad joke?
- Manual override.
- Manual override.
- We have a secret door?
- Ta-da!
(Patty and Tony) Whoa!
(Nora) What?!
- (Torrez) Come on.
- Me first?
- (Terrence) Yeah.
- Whoa! Where does this go to?
- A room full of candy!
- Let's go, honey.
(Tony) Is it safe?
- Completely. Why didn't we test this out?
- We meant to.
(Patty) Hey, I don't see any candy!
- Whoa!
- Yeah. Pretty cool, huh?
(Terrence) Your chariot awaits.
- Watch your head.
- (seat belts click)
- Do we drive this?
- Absolutely not.
The autopilot is designed to take you
to a safe house. Press the start button.
(game) Complete the challenge
to gain access.
It's asking if we're one or two players.
This has to be a trick.
- (Tony) This is Hyskor. Let's beat it.
- (Torrez) Why don't we just tap through?
No, no. Could be
a red wire-blue wire situation.
- (Torrez) Seriously?
- Yes, seriously!
- (engine revs)
- Wow.
- (skeletons rasp)
- Oh!
Patty, get to the safe house.
There's something inside
I need you to protect.
- (Patty) How do I find it?
- It'll find you.
Just keep it safe till we get there.
Wear this tracker
so that we can locate you. Syncing.
Stay safe,
and don't trust anybody.
- We don't wanna go without you!
- (Torrez) You'll be safe. See you later.
- No!
- (Terrence) Kids!
- No!
- (Patty) Tony. Tony!
No! Stay away from them!
(Patty) Mom! Dad!
(Tony) You're a much better driver
than Dad.
(Patty) I'm not driving!
(Tony) Bad guys up ahead!
They're chasing after us!
- (Tony) Tell this thing to go faster!
- (Patty) Go faster!
(tires screech)
(Patty) They're up to something!
They're hacking our autopilot.
It's driving us
to where the bad guys want us to go.
We gotta go manual
and get to the safe house ourselves.
- Keep it on the road!
- Whoa, check this out.
The anti-crash bounces us
right off obstacles.
This thing controls
just like that game Mecha Wings.
Give me that.
I'm the best at Mecha Wings.
(Tony) You're going too fast!
Ah! Ah!
(both scream)
- (Tony) He's got us!
- Oh yeah?
We gotta lose them,
or they'll follow us to the safe house.
- Look out!
- (screams)
How about some of this?
(tires screech)
You're going right into them!
- That's the idea.
- What?!
Just like Mecha Wings.
(both) Whoo!
Turn there.
(Patty, mockingly) Na-na na-na na-na!
(Patty) You're going the wrong way.
That was kind of impressive, Patty.
Thank you.
Now let's just hope
this "safe house" is actually safe.
(device beeping)
Wait a second.
I'm about to be really smart.
I think Mom and Dad
are spies.
You think?
(engine revs)
We did something wrong.
This can't be it.
(Tony) So Mom and Dad are spies,
and they sent us to the middle of nowhere?
- (Tony) This must be a joke.
- (Patty) Then why am I not laughing?
(Patty) The water is so nice and brown.
(Tony) Maybe we jump in.
(Patty) After you.
(electronic voice) Your name?
Uh, Patty Torrez.
Tony Torrez.
Your full name, please.
Uh, Patty Tango-Torrez?
My dad's last name is Tango,
and my mom's is Torrez.
- Your full name.
- We never use our full names.
They're too long.
Your full name, please.
Patricia Angelita Sorrow
Feliz Rhiannon Tango-Torrez.
Antonio Joaquin Cecilio
Rogue Amadeus Tango-Torrez.
- (bleeping)
- (Patty) The safe house is underwater?
(Tony) Either that or it drowned.
- (clunking)
- (elevator dings)
It's empty.
(Tony) This place is a dump.
(high-pitched hum)
- (both gasp)
- Hey, kiddos.
We couldn't wait to show you
the safe house when you were old enough.
If you're here now and by yourselves,
that means
something has gone terribly wrong.
But don't you worry.
Mom and Dad are very close.
And if you haven't guessed yet,
your father and I are spies.
- Whoa!
- Whoa!
Hopefully, we will see you soon
so we can explain everything.
In the meantime,
choose your activity.
There's comfort for sleep
(both) Whoa!
- Cozy beds!
- I get the top bunk.
food for nourishment
A little kitchen and snacks.
gadget tutorials for a competitive edge
(both) Whoa!
(Patty) Spy gadgets!
This place is amazing!
and spy training modules
for self-defense.
- (Terrence) Stand here.
- Spy training!
- I'm gonna be the best spy ever.
- (beep)
- (clunking)
- (Tony) Ah!
- Move over. I'm coming down.
- (Terrence) Lesson one complete.
Always look out for traps.
(Tony) Look at this place.
(Terrence) Lesson two, ambush.
"Ambush Alley."
This is easy.
Just like a video game.
Hee-hee. You did it!
(Tony) Ah!
(Terrence) Almost good.
I'm gonna try this one.
Avoid the lasers or you'll trip the alarm.
Okay. Your turn.
(beeping, whirring)
- (grunts)
- Failure!
Please try again.
- (beeping)
- (Tony) Oof!
How come when you mess up, I get hit?
Um because we're a team?
Let me try.
Smart training system.
- Let's go upstairs and do gadgets.
- Okay.
(tense music playing)
(dramatic music playing)
- Let's find a way out.
- (groans)
Oh, did they hurt you, my love?
No. No, no, no. They didn't.
The sleeper kiss is
what leaves the lingering pain.
I had to delete it.
- I know.
- Okay. Then let's break outta here.
Ah, oh.
- (clunking)
- Oh.
- Oh.
- I'm gonna say that's a trap.
At least we get to meet
whoever's behind this. Come on.
- So you're just gonna...
- Come on!
I'm sure they're gonna let us
waltz right into where they are.
This is why we get in trouble.
- You're impulsive.
- Just stay close.
I am just asking you
to use a little caution.
Stay close.
(Terrence) Come on.
- (Nora) Hear that?
- Yeah.
One, two, three.
- That's ominous.
- Yeah.
- (Terrence) Very interesting.
- (Torrez) Uh-huh.
(bricks scraping)
(Torrez) Oh.
Uh, excuse our appearance.
We didn't realize
it was Fantasy Friday here.
(Terrence) Nice architecture, by the way.
Very, uh retro video gamey.
As far as I'm concerned,
the late 20th century was the height
of visual technology.
It was all downhill from there.
Please sit down.
Oh, there
Trust me.
(suspenseful music playing)
So, Rey Kingston,
one of the most powerful tech giants
in all of history,
using a virus to force everyone
to play video games. Why?
Well, the only true benefit
in gaining power
is to influence the world.
There's no better way to do that
than through your Armageddon Code.
And you shut off
half the world with it. Happy?
No, I'm not.
Yeah, Armageddon
was supposed to allow Hyskor
to break into every device on the planet.
So why has it stopped halfway?
- Try turning it off and back on?
- That works.
(Torrez) Maybe just give it a smack.
Take it out (blows) right back in.
- You're not gonna help me fix it, are you?
- Not a chance.
There's other ways.
For the longest time,
I've wanted to challenge both of you
to a duel.
- Why us?
- I mean, are we that good?
You're not good at all.
If you win, you go free.
(blades swoosh)
If I win, you fix the code.
Let's do this.
(lively music playing)
(Terrence grunts)
(Torrez) Ah, ah Ooh.
The code I stole was complete.
You must have split it
the moment I took it from your home.
Failsafe mechanism, huh? To ensure
it doesn't fall into the wrong hands?
Wear this tracker
so that we can locate you.
So if her necklace is a tracker
Your kids have
the missing piece, don't they?
Stay away from my kids!
- Careful!
- (Torrez panting)
Is this all just a game to you?
It is.
And with game theory,
anything can be fixed,
even this sorry world.
Maybe your children will be
a little more helpful than you.
Let's find out.
(Patty) I get the top bunk now.
Spy fashion!
- (whirring)
- (gasps)
(Patty) We have all the time in the world!
Patty! It's a spy-suit generator.
(Patty) Whoa!
(Tony) I'm gonna try it.
(Patty) Maybe we should read
the instructions first.
Oh no. You're a pancake.
(triumphant music playing)
Let me try!
(rock music playing)
(Tony) The world's coolest sister.
(Terrence) Failure. Please try again.
Failure. Try again.
Super goop.
Sticks to anything
once activated.
(Tony) What is that thing?
It says it's a "thought bubble."
Looks like you select an emotion
and, boom, your enemy
is either laughing, crying, hungry
"Cute overload"?
(Tony) Gadgets are weird.
Almost good.
(whimsical music playing)
Wait a minute.
I just remembered something.
Mom told me that there was
something very important here,
but that it would find me.
Aw! Look at you!
(crab chitters)
You're my favorite thing in the world now.
I'm gonna call you
How To Be A Spy, author unknown.
"A good spy is a master of deception"?
"All spying is based on lies"?
This book is awesome.
Mom and Dad's job
is to lie and break the rules.
I don't care if it's their job.
They tell us to be honest,
but they weren't with us.
It proves that telling the truth
only gets you in trouble.
That's crazy. Telling the truth
should never be a bad thing.
Oh yeah? Look here.
"A good spy never tells the truth."
I'll never be a spy then.
Have fun with that.
I wish Mom and Dad were here now.
Well, they're not.
They're out spying.
- Tony, what if this was all our fault?
- How?
You downloaded Hyskor last night,
and then it was all over the news,
taking over the world.
I guess that makes sense.
Since we caused this game apocalypse,
then we should fix it.
You mean take down the final boss?
Like Rat Thickskull?
No, I'm saying that we save Mom and Dad
so that they can stop the bad guys
and save the world.
That's the craziest idea I've ever heard.
So let's do it.
- (dramatic music crescendoes)
- (door clicks)
(elevator dings)
(woman) Children!
We're your parents' coworkers.
Mom said not to trust anyone.
- I say take 'em down.
- What if they really are secret agents?
We can apologize later.
You're our parents' coworkers?
- So you're spies?
- Yes.
We are here to protect you.
Well, according to your manual,
a good spy never tells the truth.
So we don't trust you.
We gotta go right now.
You're not safe here.
But it's a safe house.
That's it.
They might have gadgets.
Here they come.
They could use some serious training.
Spy training.
- (Terrence) Stand here.
- Ah!
Trap door! Failure.
(agent yells)
Avoid the lasers or you'll trip the alarm.
Sorry. Try again.
(gasps) Thanks, Bronson.
Now find us another exit.
(Tony) Watch your step.
(agent) Oh!
Try harder.
(Patty) You two look hungry.
(device emits high-pitched whine)
(Patty) Thanks, Bronson.
Now let's get out of here
before they eat the whole safe house.
- (Patty) Mine.
- (Tony) Boop.
(Patty) Come on, Bronson!
You're part of the team.
(Patty) Too easy.
(man) Nice try, kids.
I'm Devlin, OSS division.
Your parents work for me.
We don't believe you.
Trust me.
- You're coming with us.
- (Tony) Huh? Oh.
We didn't know.
(Tony) He has two pairs of sunglasses.
He's definitely a spy.
Hey! Watch the gadgets.
(Tony) There are no video games
in this truck.
(Patty) Oh, look, in case anyone
ever wonders where all the spies are.
(Devlin) Everything is a mess.
Half the world got hit by a game virus.
Some things are working. Some aren't.
Yeah, we noticed.
Cool spy boat.
That's actually a plane
that's also a boat.
It's complicated, kid.
It's one of our only vehicles
that hasn't been locked down.
An OSS Super Ducky.
Why is it so small?
Fits one adult. It's called secrecy.
And secrecy is how we protect the world
from our enemies.
Now, come on. We're in a hurry.
(Patty) Well, maybe we wouldn't have
so many enemies
if we weren't spying all the time.
(Devlin) Nice dream, kid.
Our entire system's been locked up
for the past 12 hours.
We can't access anything at all.
How do we find our parents?
You got your vehicle working
and escaped your house,
so we think
you two have what it takes to help.
You want us to be real spies?
Don't get carried away.
I just want you to beat this video game
so we can access our systems.
Take off the kids' cuffs so they can do
what they do best. Play games.
- But they're dangerous, sir.
- Just Off, please.
- I told you games would come in handy.
- Okay. Get in there, kid.
(Devlin) Oh, wow.
We could never get past that part.
Wow. That is great, kid.
That is That's great.
I'll take over from here.
- I wouldn't do that.
- Me neither.
I've played a few video games in my day.
You ever heard of GoldenEye? Watch this.
- (thud)
- (character screams)
- (Devlin) Hmm.
- (kids) Mm-hmm.
All right, just, uh
get it done.
The system's back online.
Yeah, that's good work, kid.
All right. Now we can
start searching for leads.
Let's go, people. I wanna see some names.
Mom told me there was
something hidden at the safe house.
- Do you have something important, Bronson?
- (Bronson chitters)
(Devlin) The Armageddon Code.
But only a piece of it?
Oh. Your parents were smart
to split the code.
This gives us a fighting chance.
What happens
if the bad guy gets both pieces?
Your parents are
only authorized to use that piece.
If the enemy combines them,
he'd infect every device in the world
with his game virus.
He'd be king of the planet.
The King.
Devlin, we might know who your bad guy is.
(menacing music playing)
(agent) Unauthorized access. Oh!
- (computer beeping)
- Here it is.
(Tony) Rey Kingston.
But everyone knows him as the King.
Someone broke into our parents' system
and stole Armageddon.
It could only have been the King.
His new game, Hyskor,
is what you're seeing
on every device across the world.
The FBI already raided
his game studio this morning,
but it was empty,
and this King was nowhere to be found.
Well, in his games, he always hides
the bad guy in a cool, secret lair.
People, how do we find him?
I want suggestions.
Well, my mom gave me this to track us.
So maybe we reverse-track her tracker?
That must be
where your parents are located.
And quite possibly
the King.
(power thunks)
- Somebody else is in control.
- It means the bad guys are gonna break in.
From there, there, and there.
- What?
- Trust me.
- We've learned from experience.
- Know how much money I pay for security?
There's one!
(frantic yelling)
(Devlin) Get Armageddon out of here!
Protect the code!
Mom told us that we have to keep this safe
until she finds us.
- (rock music playing)
- (zapping)
(character grunts)
- Whoa! Did you see that?
- See what happens if you kick 'em.
It did it again.
(Devlin) Give me that!
Let the grown-ups handle this.
(Heck Knight) Give me the code.
(Devlin) Whoa!
(Patty) They're getting away!
- We need to find out where they're going.
- Bronson, we need eyes on the Heck Knight.
Devlin! Get up and go chase them!
- (clattering)
- (Patty) Ugh.
The bad guys are escaping on the lake.
We'll never catch them.
(Tony) You can do the driving.
But only OSS agents know
how to drive this.
- (engine revs)
- Thanks, Bronson!
(Tony) I just remembered I get seasick.
(dramatic music playing)
They're getting away!
Our boat can't swim.
Yeah, well, their boats can't fly.
Bronson, airborne mode.
(Patty) Bronson, here's the location
we got from the necklace.
Fly us there.
(Tony) Then we can get the code
and save Mom and Dad.
Why are you still reading that book?
These are the cheat codes to life.
You shouldn't cheat the King.
It'll backfire on you.
Be smart and play fair.
- Doesn't work.
- How can you say that?
Remember when we snuck into Dad's office
and found that puzzle he was working on?
Uh-huh. The one
that was really tricky to finish.
When I solved it for him,
I thought he'd be happy,
but he got mad at me for sneaking
into his work, saying I was dishonest.
Yeah. Then he put up
the tech restrictions on all our stuff.
See? Telling the truth
only got me in trouble.
Maybe at first.
But in the end, honesty always wins.
(alarm blaring)
King's lair up ahead!
- We're not slowing down.
- Bronson, what's wrong?
We're gonna crash into that wall!
(mysterious music playing)
- That wall isn't really there.
- Oh.
Polygon-based architecture.
Just like in old video games.
This guy is living the dream.
(beeping, whirring)
(Tony) No way.
This whole place is
covered in some sort of AR overlay.
AR? That hologram stuff
that makes things look different
than they are?
Yeah, that stuff.
Maybe these glasses
can help us find Mom and Dad.
(breathes heavily, grunts)
Don't take a nap.
We have to keep trying or stop the code
so we can get back to the kids.
Even if we can escape,
I don't think I can stop this.
But you made the code.
Can't you unmake it?
Yes and no.
Operation Fireball?
Of course.
We had to take down that villain Vargos.
We were supposed to destroy his lair
and everything in it,
but I found plans for this weapon.
Plans for the Armageddon Code?
I I brought the plans back home
so I could finish
building the code, but I
I couldn't figure it out. I failed.
- (Torrez) How did you finish it?
- (Terrence) I didn't.
Tony did.
He doesn't even really know it,
but he did.
- How is that possible?
- He got into my work somehow.
He knew the plans better than I did.
He finished what I started,
and I built Armageddon
on top of what he gave me.
I could've told him everything,
but I scolded him
and put tech restrictions up
to protect the code.
The kids don't even know that's why
everything they love
is being kept from them.
And this is all my fault.
That is quite a story.
I knew you were hiding something from me.
But it doesn't matter who made what.
I've taken the missing piece
from your children,
and within minutes,
the code will be ready to fire. (laughs)
Your kids failed you.
Or maybe you failed them.
(The King chuckles)
So Tony made the code.
Now no one in the world can stop me.
Tony! Tony made it!
(suspenseful music playing)
There's a computer behind this panel.
Bronson, we need your help.
Now we can download a map of this place.
Look. The prison cells
are right by the King's VR pods
he showed on that video at school.
I hear footsteps.
- (Tony) Just don't look down.
- (Patty) I might've already looked down.
(The King) Armageddon is close
to being combined.
Then it will be unstoppable.
The King is already combining the code.
We have to find Mom and Dad now.
Those Hyskor characters
are just AR overlays too.
They're actually robots.
Those robots aren't so scary.
(screams) Ah!
- We need to jump.
- What? Are you crazy?
- (Tony) We need to jump.
- No!
(both yell)
(robots whir and clunk)
(beeping, whirring)
(Tony) Those things are totally scary.
(Patty) This way to the prison cells.
(Torrez sighs)
(sweeping orchestral music playing)
- (Torrez) Is that
- (Terrence) Our kids.
- (Terrence) Patty!
- (Patty) Mom! Dad!
Oh, my babies!
Are you safe?
Stand back.
I'm setting my Magna Boots
from pull to push.
- (Torrez) Oh!
- (Terrence) Well done!
- (Terrence) Well done!
- (Torrez) That's my girl. Oh!
I can't believe you found us.
How How did you even get here?
Aw. Bronson flew us in the Super Ducky
that we jacked from the OSS.
- I am so proud
- That is
- in this moment
- just beyond, my sweets.
(Heck Knight) Armageddon is combined.
Launching in six minutes.
What now, master spies?
The clock's ticking.
Actually, I have a really solid plan
inspired by our greatest mission.
- Operation Fireball.
- You got it.
What was this Operation Fireball exactly?
Our mission was to infiltrate
the operation of an evil man named Vargos.
(Terrence) And we were able
to infiltrate his lair by
knocking on the door.
You just knocked on his door?
- With a truck.
- Big truck.
(Torrez) Mm-hmm.
We used our gadgets
to get past the guards.
(lively spy music playing)
Friendly gadgets?
Well (mumbles)
I went to stop the superweapon
while your mother negotiated with Vargos.
You mean "beat up," don't you?
That sums it up.
I couldn't stop the bomb in time.
I had to stall just long enough
So that we can
set our own bomb off instead.
We wiped out Vargos's operation
in one glorious
(both) Fireball.
- Pew!
- Pff!
- I love you.
- I love you more.
Not awesome!
You could've found a better way.
I'd Hmm? How?
You could've asked nicely
to see Mr. Vargos.
You could've used a thought bubble
to keep the guards entertained.
(fun jingle playing)
You could've gotten an understanding
of his interior-design sense.
You could've intervened in his plan
with a softer touch.
I guess we could've considered that.
So that maybe
instead of Operation Fireball,
it could be Operation Peace and Harmony.
(sweeping string music playing)
- That's my child.
- Yeah. Yeah. Certainly not mine.
- (Heck Knight) Armageddon in four minutes.
- We have four minutes left.
I could come up with a fantastic plan
if I had a map of this place.
- Boop.
- (gasps) Yes! Well done.
We have to get to these computer terminals
to stall for time.
Let's go.
- (Tony) That's the whole plan?
- Yup.
We're gonna buy some time
to send a signal to OSS for help.
- We stall when we can beat the King?
- Armageddon is being armed.
Nothing we can do now except slow down
its final process. Let's split up.
- I'll take Tony. You take Patty.
- They have Magna Boots.
- They can access the branching path.
- No, no, no, no.
- It's too dangerous for them.
- You're right.
Come here a second.
We can do this.
(Patty) Yeah.
- Okay. Hey, you two stick together, okay?
- Okay.
- And stick to the plan.
- (Patty) Got it.
We love you too!
(both sigh)
- I immediately regret this.
- So much.
- Yeah. We should go.
- Yep.
(energetic music playing)
- I need eyes in the hall.
- On it.
(gasps) Tony, we gotta hurry!
(Tony) I'm trying to beat Hyskor
to stall for time.
You lost.
- I've got a new plan.
- What new plan?
If we get to this elevator,
we can stop the countdown.
That's not what they told us to do.
We have to stick to the plan.
We have to do whatever it takes to win.
(Patty exhales)
I think you were right, Patty.
About what?
We're not gonna make it.
- (clunking)
- (both scream)
(suspenseful music playing)
That must be the central computer.
I can use it to stop Armageddon.
(keys tapping)
(Tony) Whoa.
Wait a minute.
I know this.
I made this.
You made the Armageddon Code?
Sort of. It was that weird puzzle
from Dad's work, but it wasn't a puzzle.
- It was the plans for Armageddon Code.
- How are you gonna stop it though?
The same way I solved it.
The last part of the plan
had a trick to it,
where you couldn't tell
if it was completed
because you had to do
the same steps backwards.
That's how I'm going to break it.
(whirring, beeping)
Okay. What do I do?
- Press that button.
- Which one?
- We're out of time!
- Almost there.
You couldn't tell
if the code was completed or not.
Tony, wait! Stop! It's a trick!
(Heck Knight) You have armed Armageddon.
(Tony) What?
I just stopped it.
Wrong, Tony.
You've put it together for me.
- Mom! Dad!
- Oh, the whole family!
You weren't able
to complete the code yourself, were you?
Even after you got the missing piece.
Only the true code creator can activate
the world-conquering potential.
I made this fake countdown
so you, Tony, could combine it for me.
Thank you.
We downloaded Hyskor last night
and caused all of this.
No, no, no.
You just wanted to play a game.
You didn't cause this.
They did.
And so did the rest of the world.
Vargos was my father.
From Operation Fireball?
He was a genius that used his technology
to make our home country a better place.
Sure, his head wasn't always
in the right spot,
but someone could have helped guide him.
But you OSS agents
laid waste to everything,
stole Armageddon
as a weapon for yourselves.
He would've improved the world
with his creation.
But instead, my father spent
the last days of his life
in some top secret prison.
I never saw him again.
I'm so sorry,
but we can't let you do this.
The only way
to make this world better is by force,
and my father's creation
will do just that.
Armageddon Code, select target.
(computer chirps)
The world.
(ominous music playing)
This entire broken planet
will be fixed by Hyskor,
a game that makes you a better person
as you play.
Because I'm in control.
Enjoy your life
of play.
(engine roars)
(imposing fanfare)
(music fades)
We did this all wrong.
Yeah, we did.
I'm sorry I wasn't a good spy
like you wanted me to be.
No. I'm sorry, Patty.
With your honest heart,
you are better than I will ever be.
And you are so much more
than I could have hoped for.
(gentle music playing)
I wanted to win, Dad,
but I ended the world.
No. No, you didn't, pal.
You didn't. I did.
When you brought me the code,
and I didn't tell you the truth.
I'm so, so, so, so sorry.
Hey. How about you two show us
how to play this Hyskor game, huh?
We got nothing else to do
now that the world as we know it is over.
Wait. There might still be
a way we can win this.
- Oh
- But we can't stop the King anymore.
Well, not physically, obviously,
but we can stop him virtually, can't we?
(mysterious music playing)
Look. The King is using this VR pod
to control Armageddon.
He is inside the game.
But if we use these VR pods,
then we can beat him
the same way you beat Hyskor.
Reach the end of the world,
defeat the last player standing,
win the crown.
- Yeah.
- This sounds crazy.
It is crazy.
So let's do it.
- Oh.
- W I
- (Torrez) That's your child.
- (Terrence) Wait.
(frantic music playing)
- (Tony) Back. Patty, come here!
- Patty!
Cute overload.
(device bleeps and bloops)
They're not so bad.
They're just cute little beep-boops.
(robotic bleeping)
Can you help us
play against the King in Hyskor?
You're right, Patty. He's controlling
Armageddon from inside the game.
But if we beat him before he locks us out,
we can save the world.
Here's my plan.
We go in, but no cheats, no tricks,
no rat skills.
- We play fair together.
- Wait, we go into the video game?
- Yeah.
- I think we need to regroup.
- There's no time.
- We should call the OSS agents.
Figure this out the spy way.
I'm not following
the spy playbook anymore.
Patty's been right all this time.
I trust her.
- Then let's play.
- Let's go.
(Patty) Dad, you know how you always
tell us video games will fry our brain?
- Yeah.
- If we lose
- This game might actually fry our brains.
- (Patty) Yeah.
- Wait, what'd they say?
- (chuckles) It's She didn't
- We're gonna have fun. Let's have fun.
- Okay.
(majestic music playing)
We're trapped!
No, Dad. It's an elevator.
The game's about to start.
Tony, you're playing as Rat Thickskull!
- And you're playing as Florella!
- Wait, what are these outfits?
The game made you
play as a character called Tayanna.
(Tony) And the game made you
play as a character called Itza.
Got it.
Here we are.
Where are we?
We're at the end of the world. The finale
of the world's most challenging game.
The ground is cracking. We have to go now!
- All right.
- This game is not fun.
Step one,
we have to get to that giant statue
to find the King.
- (Terrence) Are you sure this is right?
- (Torrez) Just keep up!
I'm working on it!
(groans) And there goes my back.
(Tony) Now we have to fight a few bad guys
to get to the statue.
(Patty) And with only nine minutes left.
Wait. Why are there so many of them?
(Tony) It's a game.
It's more fun that way.
(Tony) If we fall, we lose.
(Patty) If we don't work as a team,
we lose.
(Terrence) How do we not lose?
Just think of this as an ambush.
- (swords ring)
- (grunting)
(Terrence) Ouch! Ow. Ow.
(Patty) How about a skeleton?
Two skeletons!
Use your bracelet.
It's like a spy gadget.
- (Patty) See?
- Whoa.
- (Tony) Use your hammer to hit, Dad!
- Oh!
(Terrence) Argh!
(Terrence laughs) Ah!
Your dad's pretty cool, huh?
Is that a flaming skull?
(Patty) Get lost!
You too.
Flaming skulls!
Go, Mom!
Thank you, Mom.
I'll always have your back.
- (gasps) Duck!
- Whoa!
I upgraded.
Look at you.
Florella gets stronger
as you work through the game.
She sure does.
(jubilant fanfare playing)
(tense music builds)
So is that it? Did we win?
No. It's time for step two.
We have to beat the last player standing.
The King.
(Tony) But only one of us
can go in to face him.
The rest of us
have to defeat his champion,
the Heck Knight.
(Patty) You're our best player, Tony.
You're the only one
who can beat the King
without losing all your health.
What? We have health?
Yeah. Yours is low, Dad. Real low.
- Oh. I thought I was just losing weight.
- No. Come on!
I don't know if I can win this
without my tricks or cheats.
What if I lose?
Worth it.
(foreboding music playing)
(The King) Now,
while everyone plays Hyskor,
I can improve the world.
Deleting all nuclear launch codes.
No need for that in my world.
Another player ready to cheat.
I've been watching your every move
from this throne,
and as I have designed my games from here,
now I'm designing Earth.
(thunder rumbles)
(The King) You are so impressive.
I don't think I could even stop you kids
out there in the real world.
But in here,
I can never lose.
(rapid whooshing)
If you lower my health to zero, you win.
But if I lower yours
game over.
(sword clatters)
(The King laughs)
Careful, Tony. The staff is
Rat Thickskull's worst weapon.
it's a good thing I'm not Rat Thickskull.
Because Rat's not good at a lot of things.
He's a scoundrel.
He does anything to win.
And that's why today,
I'm playing as myself.
Shall we?
(frantic music playing)
(Tony grunting)
(Tony) Agh!
(The King laughs)
(Tony) Agh!
(The King laughing)
(Tony) First of all, "the King"?
If you can create your own world,
why not make yourself the king? (echoes)
You'll become the court jester
when I'm done with you.
(dramatic music playing)
(Terrence laughs)
(Heck Knight) I cannot be defeated.
Well, remember me?
Yeah. I didn't have
this big ol' fist then, did I?
Catch me
(Torrez) Oh, baby.
Nice catch.
But I love you.
(rock music playing)
- We have to beat that Heck Knight.
- Honey.
Let's do Operation Fireball,
but not our way.
(both) Patty's way.
(rock music intensifies)
- You have been such a great challenge.
- We appreciate you.
- Keep up the good work.
- You're golden.
(Patty) Whoa!
Stay back! Don't come over here!
- The ground is unstable. You'll fall.
- (Heck Knight) Why would I trust you?
Because you can.
- (Heck Knight roars)
- (Patty screams)
(Terrence) Come on, big guy. (grunts)
You did it. You found a better way.
You saved the Heck Knight.
(Heck Knight) Florella,
henceforth, I will follow you,
for your integrity is pure.
We did our part,
but we're running out of time.
Tony has to win. Now.
(dramatic music playing)
- Whoo!
- Yes, Tony!
(dramatic music intensifies)
- No!
- What?!
(The King) Come on, Rat.
Use your tricks and cheats.
Ahh! Oof!
Tony's in trouble.
Dad, don't.
I have to help him.
Your father's breaking the rules!
(gentle guitar music playing)
- No, Dad. I have to do this myself.
- (whirring, beeping)
(Tony, breathlessly) No cheating.
But I played fair.
It doesn't matter.
(whirring winds down)
- No!
- Oh no! No, no!
Victory is mine!
(thunder crashing)
I never thought
anyone would ever earn that.
- The One Hit.
- (Torrez) What?
(Patty) Tony just received
the legendary One Hit,
the mythical ability
hidden within the game.
How did you
Maybe because I played the game
like my sister said.
I believe her now.
No. No. No!
- Yeah!
- Yay!
(triumphant choral music playing)
(whirring winds down)
(Tony) You lost.
You won fair and square,
but I can't let you stop Armageddon.
It's the only way to fix this world.
You could have removed the One Hit
from the game, but you didn't.
Yes, but I stopped trusting this world
to make itself a better place.
The only way to do it is by force.
Your games never forced me to play fair.
My sister inspired me to.
So now we just have to inspire the world
to be better.
You know, instead of forcing everyone
to be gamers like us.
Like us.
It's true.
You and your sister have shown
that maybe we do have the power to
inspire them.
He's running out of time!
(rousing orchestral music playing)
Shut down Armageddon.
(squeaky laughter)
Yes! Yes, Tony!
I knew you could do it.
(electronic hum)
(skeletons laugh and cheer)
(Heck Knight) Tremendous effort.
Well done.
You showed me the goodness I thought
I could only find in a game world,
and I I thank you.
- You've raised some wonderful children.
- We did.
Congratulations, agents.
You have defeated your enemy.
- What?
- Now the King must face his sentence.
- There's a better way.
- What?
Throwing him in prison
won't make him a good person.
- Then where do we send him?
- This is why we need to make a change.
Inside his own game.
The only reason we won
is because his game
makes you better as you play.
- Hyskor has all the guidance he needs.
- That's not how we work in the OSS.
Actually, it is.
Excuse me?
On page two of How To Be a Spy,
it states that the high-level OSS agent
that catches the enemy
is best suited to decide their judgment.
And because we caught the enemy
and you didn't,
that makes us the high-level agents.
- (character) Ooh!
- (Heck Knight) Radical!
- Smart kid.
- Yeah.
Therefore, the King will be locked
inside his lair under OSS surveillance
until he beats Hyskor.
- (Heck Knight) Yes! (laughs)
- (cheering)
What should have been done for your father
we're going to do for you.
You're saving me?
You'll be saving yourself
by working through your own game.
And with game theory,
anything can be fixed.
Or anyone.
Watch me on the screen.
(tender music playing)
Thank you.
I never thought our kids
would show us how to be great spies.
They showed us how to be something better.
Devlin, two decades of service with you
in the OSS has been an honor, but
we quit.
Excuse me?
We'd rather figure out
our own way to save the world.
Honestly and together.
Sir. The Armageddon Code.
- Is this the only copy?
- Yes, it is.
- (Devlin) We don't need it.
- (chip crunches)
Not in the new OSS. You might like
some of the changes we'll be making,
to turn the OSS into a more effective
and honest job.
- (Torrez) Then we're staying.
- See you at your desks Monday morning?
(Terrence) Mm-hmm.
All of your desks.
All of our desks! Oh!
So proud of you, buddies.
(Heck Knight chortles) Well played.
(excited chatter)
(adventurous music playing)
(adventurous music continues)
(seat belts clicking)
- (beeps)
- Well, Spy Kids.
Good morning, Devlin.
I have a little progress report
on your last mission.
(reporter) Not only has the world
gone back to normal,
but the one who caused Armageddon
is now helping people
with the use of technology,
calling himself the Court Jester.
He did it.
He beat his game.
You ready for more?
- (Patty) Oh yeah.
- (beeps)
(engine revs)
(adventurous music playing)
Cannot see for
Honesty or
Prodigy of authenticity, oh
Sorry I'm not sorry
It's the only me I can be
There's something you're forgetting
Truth wins in Armageddon
Just find it for a minute
Yeah, let go
Of all the ways of putting on a show
There's no way you can spin it
Yeah, maybe you're forgetting
Truth wins in Armageddon
I can't tell you what feels right
Nothing's ever black and white
The good intentions on your side
Are putting up a fight
Just find it for a minute
Yeah, let go
Of all the ways of putting on a show
There's no way you can spin it
Yeah, maybe you're forgetting
Truth wins in Armageddon
(intense music playing)