Spycies (2019) Movie Script

Alright, I'm at the meeting point.
Everything clear?
Alright Harry, I see you.
Let me check.
A good looking girl like me,
without a husband.
Isn't that a shame, Armando?
Cheetahs? What's going on?
I should check this out.
Don't start Vladimir. We don't need you
blowing up half the city.
It's a simple pick-up.
Stick to the mission.
- You got it boss!
- I hope so. For your sake.
Harry, the contact is behind you.
- Alright, it's all there.
- OK, he's got it. We're done.
It's so hard to find the right guy.
Where are you going? Armando?
What the...
Harry! We've got a problem! Run!
- What?
- Who are you talking to?
Oh my God! I'm gonna die!
What would you like? Green tea?
- What is your name?
- Willis, Vladimir Willis.
Oh my God... Oh my God!
What have you done to my restaurant?
Harry? I don't know.
I lost him in the chase.
Rookies, you know how it is.
You just can't trust 'em.
Anyway... Job's done.
A walk in the park.
I have the briefcase,
and the bad guys are going to jail.
Yeah! Nobody does it
like Vladimir Willis.
What's that?
Are you building robots now Oxford?
No, It's an exoskeleton.
A mechanical suit designed
to enhance your physical abilities.
Sorry. What?
It's a suit of armor
that makes you stronger.
I don't need it.
I'm already as strong as they come.
Willis, some day you're gonna die
of modesty.
- How does this work?
- Come on! You know the old code.
Three long knocks,
then two short knocks.
What? Like this?
Don't touch that.
Agent Willis!
Report to the top floor immediately.
Alright! See you Ox!
I'm gonna get a medal for this.
I just know it.
Agent Willis! Report to the top...
- Agent Willis reporting Captain.
- Yes, Mr. Mayor. Of course, Mr. Mayor
It goes without saying.
I'm going to do that right know.
Yes. Yes. Thank you Mr. Mayor.
So, I'm sure the mayor is really happy
about this mission?
You should have seen me in the streets,
chasing those cheetas.
A tea house! Two trucks!
Three motorcycles!
And four agency cars destroyed
Eighty-four houses damaged!
Seventeen people hurt!
And fifteen watermelons crushed!
Not there.
And strangely, a thank-you letter
from a couple of hippos.
But at least
100 serious damage complains!
And one agent in the hospital!
Do you realize what you've done?
You've made this agency
look like a terrorist organization!
Boss, I caught the guys.
I got the briefcase!
Who cares
about a little collateral damage?
This is not the way we do things,
This agency must be beyond reproach.
Vladimir, you're a great agent,
but you're out of control!
I'm going to have to bench you
for a while.
You're assigned to security duty
on one of our off-shore platforms
in the Oriental Sea.
What? Me? Security?
Oriental what?
It's a disciplinary reassignment!
But don't take this mission lightly.
There is sensitive material
on that base.
But I'm your best agent?!
You can't just put me on the shelf!
It's only temporary.
Until things cool down.
It's a calm and quiet place.
It will give you time to think.
And try to be nice
to the other agent working there.
He's the best IT expert in the Agency.
You'll see, he's one of a kind.
What? Another agent?! Wait!
Boss! You know I always work alone.
Stop, Willis! Shut up.
It's either the platform or the door!
What the...
What a mess...
I'm teaming up with a pig?
- Vladimir? I'm Vector.
- Vector? So you're the pig living here.
I'm not a pig! I'm a rat!
And my name is Vector, not Vector.
Come on!
Take that toothbrush out of your mouth!
So sorry, I'm Hector.
I'm so glad to see you!
But... Weren't you supposed
to arrive at seven tonight?
- No. Seven a.m. Not p.m.
- PM. Right! Ok. Who cares?
Look, I'm just so glad you're here.
Days can get very long here.
Yeah yeah yeah!
I made a bed for you! See?
I'm so glad I have someone to talk to!
Ok, ok I'll give you mine.
Ok, it's settled!
Now come on! Gimme a hug!
Go put on some pants, will you?
I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!
I was just so alone here.
You'll see. We're gonna become
fast friends. I just know it.
No. I'm not here to make friends. I'll
be out of here by tomorrow, you'll see
My love. Your yellow coat
and black stripes.
Our love is larger than any prejudice.
Taller than the Eiffel Tower.
Way taller than tall things,
and much...
Regina or Margherita?
- Four cheese!
- Regina or Margherita?
Three cheese then!
You have any idea
how many germs there are?
The sun is as yellow as your skin.
And soon,
it will be as dark as your stripes.
You're a poet of love.
Your muzzle is made of tenderness.
And your paws
have the strength of kindness.
Lame! This dialogue is crap.
Your eyes have courage
as does a bathroom sink.
And your feet have as much respect
as your ancestors.
Stop! It moves me. You're ruining
it all. Mia is my favorite actress.
But she's terrible!
Mia? Terrible? You don't know
what you're talking about!
Her talent shines
like the shadow of sorrow.
Hey! Stop making fun of her
or we won't be pals any more.
- I'm her biggest fan.
- Wait? Pals? What pals?
Just so you know Mr. Biggest fan,
Mia is gonna die.
Three episodes from now, falling down
her mother's hive elevator shaft.
- What? How?
- The stairs were out of order.
- Oh my God! Tell me you're kidding!
- No. I read it on the internet.
The Internet? I can't believe it!
Why are you doing this to me?
You're a really bad person Vladimir!
Spoiling my favorite show like this...
Especially with my favorite actress.
Has that light
been beeping for long?
How should I know?
You were the one on guard duty!
We have intruders!
Get ready for some action! Go!
Ok, ok! Let me find my gun.
Wait! You have to wait...
Stay behind me,
and try not to do anything stupid.
I'll try, but you know
action is not really my strong suit.
Yeah. I figured that out already.
- Hey boss! We got company.
- Ok. Let's see what I can do.
OK. That should do the trick.
Wait! What's that?
Drones! Get ready!
What the blazes are you doing?
Slow them down. I got you covered, ok?
- Push! More! More!
- I'm pushing Boss, I'm pushing.
Hands up!
You should have stayed in front
of the TV with the queen of bad acting.
You shouldn't have spoiled
the show for me.
Without you,
I would have caught those guys!
No! It's your fault.
You are not a team player.
You know what your problem is? You're
as useless at work as you are in life.
I don't need a numbskull like you...
The radiuzite was stolen on your watch?
You were supposed to secure that base,
and everything in it!
Radiuzite is a very rare substance,
classified top-secret!
It's way above your clearance!
Your only job was to avoid intrusions!
And you failed
like a couple of rookies!
Boss, I have a great lead.
The guys who robbed the base are
operating from an hospital downtown.
Finding the thieves
keeps you on this mission.
This is your last chance.
You have to get that Radiuzite back.
I want you both to go to the hospital
under cover and investigate.
Both of us? Come on boss! Not again!
I don't want to work with him.
I don't want to work with him either!
Knowing what a show spoiler...
You'll do as you're told! You're going
there under cover as a team.
Now get out!
I don't want to see you any more.
Ok, ok. So, we are a couple of nurses.
We have our badges.
- Let's go!
- Yes! Exactly. I'm ready.
Let's see.
I have my antibacterial gel...
I have lots and lots of tissues...
It's weird!
I can't find my toothbrush anywhere.
Hector look! Mia! Your favorite actress.
She's right there,
in front of the hospital.
What? Oh my God! It's...
Come on! If this is a joke it...
Sorry. I'm the nurse.
You're the patient.
Yes, hello?
Help me! My wife is going to give birth
at home! Labour has already started.
Mr. Rabbit. Here we go again.
Please hold the line while I transfer
your call to the obstetric department.
- No. It's all good. The baby is born.
- Fine. Talk to you tomorrow Mr. Rabbit.
- Wait! She's giving birth again.
- How surprising...
Everything went well.
- Sir, I'll have to put you on hold.
- Wait! There is one more coming.
Please hold the line.
Hello, my dear! Guess who I just saw?
A star! No! Not her.
Better than a reality show starlet.
Yes! That's her!
I swear. With four eyes...
- Well, how can I help?
- I'm the new nurse.
Rex? You're "Rex" the nurse?
- That's a dog's name.
- Rex? Right, right. Rex?
First floor.
Then you'll go to the locker room.
It's indicated everywhere.
Now chop-chop.
- It's you.
- Me?
- No, it's not me.
- Of course it's you! The cat.
Of course not. Look, Rex. I'm a dog.
I'm sorry
- Who was that?
- I guess it wasn't him.
Doctor, can you keep this secret?
It's really important to me.
Our organization
is very good at keeping secrets.
No one can know about this.
Especially not my mother.
We are very discreet.
And I would appreciate a larger room.
I'll see what I can do.
I love you too.
Sir? Are you alright?
Once I find you
we're going to have a little chat.
Vladimir, where are you?
So! Tell me what you see.
- It's a... Caterpillar
- Ok. Great. And... now?
- A ladybug.
- Good! Good! And now?
- It's a butterfly.
- Great.
Have you seen a cat?
No madam.
- What brings you here?
- What brings you here?
- Sorry?
- Sorry.
- Stop that!
- Stop that!
- It's not funny.
- It's not funny.
I'm a stupid parrot.
You too?
- Come in.
- Come in.
The locker room, please?
Next door.
Dude, I've never seen you before.
Are you new here?
- Yep, just started today.
- Rex?
That's a dog's name.
Nice to meet you Rex.
I'm Cap and this is Jim.
We're the maintenance guys.
Nice to meet you guys.
I've got to go, I have people to cure.
- Have you guys seen a cat?
- Nope, just the ugliest dog ever.
Our city was the unsuspecting target
of an unprecedented terrorist attack.
Eddy Clark is reporting live
from the scene.
This morning, a white rhinoceros
was attacked by an unknow individual.
The poor beast was frozen
by an icy laser beam.
As I speak,
he is being transported to the Central
Hospital in critical condition.
I would like to remind you that the
white rhino is an endangered species.
Only five white rhinos
remain on the planet.
Let's listen to what Captain Kotor,
the Agency's Director, has to say.
This horrible attack was obviously
targeted. The reason is clear.
Total annihilation of a species
which is already in great danger.
We will not take this lying down.
We are currently
searching for the suspect,
and we will not stop
before he has been brought to justice.
An attack on one of us
is an attack on all of us.
Eddy? Eddy you're live.
Twenty years ago, the mammoths also
disappeared from the face of the earth
after freezing to death.
Do you think these two phenomena
are related?
We are currently investigating that
very topic. No stone will go unturned.
- Faster! Faster! His heart will stop!
- We can't go faster.
- This guy is really heavy.
- Please, please save my dad! Please!
Get OR 63 ready for me, stat!
You! Don't just stand there,
give us a hand!
The patient is a white male rhinoceros.
He is suffering from severe hypothermia,
and has frostbite on his entire body.
If we don't get to the Operating Room
asap, he will probably...
Hang on!
Hey man, this is great.
What are you doing?! You're crazy!
Don't worry, I've got this.
Ok, where is this patient?
He is right here Doc.
Of course, where is my head?
Ok. Everyone in position.
Oh my god
- Kung Fu? Is that you?
- Is it tomorrow already?
Go find somewhere else to sleep.
- Come on Fu, let's go.
- Yes, yes.
Ok. It's a severe case of hypothermia.
The patient is used to intense heat.
He was suddenly exposed
to a glacial cold.
We have to warm him up.
If cold blood continues to flow
through his heart, he'll be a gonner.
- The Demon of the Cold... Red eyes.
- Sir? Sir? Did you see his face?
From his hands...
The beam of ice...
What does he looks like?
Can you tell me anything?
Leave him be,
we have to warm him up quickly!
His skin is like ice.
- Ok. That should work.
- Give me a tomato juice.
Who drinks tomato juice, anyway?
We're losing him! Give me a million cc's
of adrenalin! Quickly!
His skin is too thick.
Bring the defibrillator! Now!
You! Get it, quick!
The defibrillator, now!
Ok, get ready! Here we go.
Three, two, one...
Three, two, one...
I already told you,
the blue goes with the blue.
No way! The blue goes with the red.
See? Nothing happened.
Now green with blue...
It doesn't fit.
Come on!
- Perfect!
- We're losing him.
All right, all right.
Step away!
Come to daddy, my little fishies.
Three, two, one...
And the last one...
It's working! We are the best.
Alright. Stay concentrated!
Organ status? Body temperature?
73 degrees F. Wait, no! 75... 77.
His temperature is rising.
He's coming for me,
The Demon of the Cold.
Everything's alright, sir.
You're safe and sound.
My daughter? Where is my daughter?
- She's right there!
- Daddy, oh daddy.
You saved my dad.
- You're my hero.
- Yes, little one, that's my job.
No, no! Not coffee!
No! Not again.
You did a great job in there.
Yeah, I didn't want to disappoint
the little girl, she's a cute kid.
Is this your first day?
I've never seen you here before.
Yep, I just started.
Let me introduce myself.
My name is Chloe.
- Nice to meet you, Chloe.
- Can I show you around?
- Cap?
- Hey, Rex.
- No... Jim had coffee again...
- Fire in the house.
Create a diversion! I'm going to find
something to stop this monster.
There you go, buddy
So? Who's the real hero now?
You saved me.
And you saved the rhino.
So I guess, that makes us even.
I found him in one of the halls?
Yeah? What am I supposed
to do with him?
Sir? Are you ok?
Sir? Wake up!
Come on! Wake up!
What are you doing in my room?
Sir? You're at the hospital.
Oh! Yeah yeah yeah!
The Hospital! The Radiuzite! The spoil!
Vladimir riding a dragon! The Agency.
The Agency? I'm a spy, you know.
I'm Jane Pond, 007.
- I'm here under cover.
- You're a spy, are you?
- Yes!
- That's amazing!
- I'm a spy too.
- I'm a spy too.
So, the three of you are spies?
Right. Sure?
That's the last time, Hen!
If you try to escape again, I'll put you
in a closet and lock the door.
And that goes for your friends too.
You haven't seen a cat named Rex,
by chance?
Yes. He's here. Look.
That looks like a goat to me.
- Ok. I have to get out of here.
- I have to get out of here.
It's locked. Alright, alright. How did
you manage to escape the last time?
I used my weapon. Do you want it?
It's my secret weapon. Wanna try?
Yes! I've heard about that!
It's The Agency's latest prototype.
The hair-dryer-rocket-launcher.
Alright! Come on! Take a step back.
The blast could blow you away.
- I have to get outta here.
- I have to get outta here.
Do you want to leave?
- Do you want to leave?
- Yes!
- Give me the password
- The password? What password?
- The Agency's password.
- There is no password.
Yes, there is.
- Give me the password.
- The password.
Congratulations. That's it!
The password is Password!
But, but...
Have you gone completely nuts?
How do I get outta here?
Ok. Help me pick up this goat.
Thanks, guys! I'll come back for you.
Thanks for showing me around
the hospital.
My pleasure.
I like spending time with you.
And look at that!
Our shift has ended and I don't have
any plans for this evening.
So, if someone were to invite me
to dinner, I might not say "no".
Vladimir! Vladimir!
Well then, have a nice evening,
Sir, Madam, Doctor...
Have a good eventing?
- What are you doing here?
- Me? All this is your fault.
You put me to sleep
and started the mission without me.
You should have stayed on the platform.
You're just not cut out
for this kind of work.
- What? But, but... We're partners.
- Partners?
I'm not your partner. I never was
and will never be your partner!
When are you going to understand?
You are not an agent, you're a burden!
Burden? Yeah?!? Well, fine!
I'm leaving!
I'll be just fine on the platform,
eating pizzas and watching Mia on TV.
Perfect. Fine. You do that!
What? This is the rhino's room?
Yeah? And your rhino is what,
The bed is cold and damp.
So he was here recently.
He can't walk on his own.
Someone must have kidnapped him.
Someone's coming! Quick!
Here we are! This is our largest room.
Is this acceptable
to our Supreme Queen of Serene?
Oh my God!
- I super adore it! It's wonderful!
- It's Mia! It's really her!
Have you taken a little time
to think about this operation?
An antenna reduction
will result in your losing the ability
to communicate with your sister bees.
It's already decided.
I don't care about my antennae.
I want to be perfect.
Very well. The operation is scheduled
for 9 am tomorrow morning.
That's per - fect.
Well, then,
see you tomorrow, Supreme Serene.
I love it when you call me
"Supreme Serene".
I know.
Come on! Move!
I need to take a picture!
Quite surprising. I would never had
imagined that you would be my contact.
Well, life is full of surprises.
You do understand that the mission
is to steal a nuclear warhead.
We're not talking about
a chatty dinner among girlfriends.
- I know exactly what I have to do.
- Good. Then the mission begins now.
Get yourself ready and meet me
at reception in 10 minutes.
Copy that.
Let's synchronize our watches.
How many people are you working with?
What do you know about the Radiuzite?
What are you planning to do with it?
The radiu-what?
I don't know! Who are you?
I'm... I'm your biggest fan!
This is a joke, right?
Did my mother send you here?
Your mother? The Queen Bee?
Is she involved?
Involved? What are you talking about?
Quite surprising. I would never had
imagined that you would be my contact.
What? What is this thing?
You do understand that the mission
is to steal a nuclear warhead?
- It's for my next role. I'm rehearsing.
- Your next role is a spy?
Yes. I'm working on the casting session
at the moment.
The director adores me.
But he thinks my antennae are too long.
If I have them shortened,
he'll give me the part.
Ok. That's great.
Apparently we made a mistake.
We're going to leave this room,
and you will continue on
as if you never saw us, understood?
Hector! Come on!
It's... It's the best day of my life!
Wait! Are you two secret agents?
Real secret agents?
- Perhaps you can help me with my role?
- Yeah, yeah!
Ok. Spy Tip number 1:
A spy must never say he is a spy.
Really? That's fantastic!
I want to know everything!
Ok, then. I don't have time for this.
Stop! Either we all work together
as a team on this mission,
or I will tell everyone
that you are secret agents?
I know a ton of journalists.
- You don't really have a choice.
- You wouldn't dare!
Oh, no?
I am the Supreme Bee Princess.
I can do whatever I want!
And you, my little sweetie,
you want to help me, right?
Yes, yes, yes. Yes. Sure!
What a putts...
You're so sweet!
Not like that big, mean cat!
Come on, give me a smile!
So, where do we start?
What's the mission?
Yes. Yes, yes, yes. Back to the mission.
OK. The rhino has disappeared.
We have to find him. He's our best lead.
If Doc gave me this room...
He must know where the rhino is,
don't you think?
Doc... Wait!
So... Are you really going to have
an antennae reduction?
That's too bad. I happen to like
your antennae, very much.
You are so cute!
Come on! Listen.
Somebody's coming! Quick!
Basement floor two and a half.
The boss is waiting for us.
I'm very worried. This will all end up
attracting their curiosity.
Don't worry.
We're flying under the radar.
Those guys seem really, really
suspicious! We should go after them.
Do you have your pass for basement
floor two and a half? I forgot mine.
Yes. Of course.
They're going down
to the third basement level.
Hector, take the stairs
and try to get there before they do.
We'll keep watch from here.
Look. They're coming back up!
- Hector?
- No one's there. They evaporated.
- Where did they go?
- A secret passage, perhaps?
This is my favorite episode!
With the kissing scene
and the taffeta sofa...
Hector! Come on!
Yes, yes, yes... Sorry.
Let me take a look.
OK, I'm going to hack
the history output of the system.
We should be able
to find out where they went.
Do you have any idea
what you are doing?
That's clever! There is a secret floor!
Between basement levels two and three.
I'll take us there now.
What are we going to find?
Will it be dangerous?
- I need a gun too, don't you think?
- Quiet!
That's weird.
I though I heard the doors open.
Yeah, me too.
Guys? Seriously, guys!
The action is over here!
Of course
Ok, ok. Stay behind me.
I'll cover you with my body.
I'm taller than you are.
Wait! Wait! Wait!
Mammoth island?
What the...
Doc is everywhere in these pictures.
He's the Demon of the Cold.
Cap? Experience X-1, day one?
There is an "X-1" file right here.
"Mastering Climate Variations"?
I can't open this box.
What box?
That's not a box, it's a VHS tape.
- Sorry. Say that again?
- It's a video-tape.
- I don't see any movies.
- No, no, no. They don't work like that.
You need a tape player to read the tape.
And do you have a tape player?
No, they're antiques.
You can probably find them in museums.
That's some pretty
hi-tech spy equipment.
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!
The Radiuzite!
We found the Radiuzite! It's all here.
Oh my God! I looove those colors!
The suits!
The rhino!
Come on! Come on! Come on!
We need to save him!
Ok, Hector. On three.
One, two, three!
Freeze! Don't move a muscle!
You guys are under arrest!
The Demon of the Cold!
He's attacking the rhino again!
Come on, big guy. Why don't you pick
on someone your own size?
Take a look at this baby!
A Bonnie T140, with a side car.
Do you really think
this is the time to talk motorcycles?
Too cool... But why is The Agency's logo
imprinted on the side-car?
So, does this side-car do anything?
Depends on the model.
It'll be a surprise.
Ok. How do I start this thing?
The old code!
Three long knocks, then two short ones.
Yeah! It works!
- Will you look at that!
- Go Vladimir? You can get him!
Yeah! I love my job!
Take that!
Come back here!
I'm not done with you yet!
- My sisters will never believe me.
- Stay here. It'll be safer.
Where are you?
Hey, Mr. Tin Can!
Don't you dare touch my friend!
We lost him.
You ok?
We have to take care of your injuries?
In any case, now we know why
Doc has been stealing Radiuzite.
He needs a stable and powerful
source of energy
to operate his high-tech ice suit.
And raidiuzite is the ideal thing.
So... Does that mean that Doc
is the Demon of the Cold?
Yes. And now... We have proof.
Look! I grabbed some of his hair
during the fight.
Ok! Ok! Great! I need my briefcase
to perform a D.N.A. analysis.
We've almost solved the riddle!
That's great!
Ok! Ok! Alright!
Let's see what we have here.
- Vladimir! Look at that!
- Unknown species? Extend Data Base?
Are you kidding? What kind
of a rotten machine do you have?
Your computer
can't even recognize a bear.
Bears have several sub-species. Maybe
Doc is a very rare species of bear.
Never mind.
You can never count on machines.
We have to find a way
to watch this tape.
Stop moving! Stay still!
Don't go through with the operation.
I think your antennae are wonderful.
I've already told you, I can't get this
role if I still have these antennae.
But... Getting a role should only be
based on your talent, shouldn't it?
Yeah... but she doesn't have any.
I forgot about my operation.
It's time for your operation.
What are doing here?
Are you two together?
Sorry! In fact,
it's none of by business.
What do you mean, "together"?
I mean, what are you trying to say?
No, no, no! Are you kidding me?
- I have nothing to do with this guy.
- Okay.
But Rex,
what are you doing here?
In fact, he's...
He's my cousin
Yes, that's him! He's my super cousin.
Your cousin is a cat...
With a dog's name?
Mia, it's time for your operation.
Yes! Of course.
Do you wanna reconsider?
You can still cancel, you know?
No. I'm going to do this.
This is a dream role.
It's worth a little antennae
reduction, right? I'm following you.
Very well. Rex, you should come too,
to support your cousin.
I... Ok. I'm coming.
Doc? Did you injure your arm?
This? It's nothing.
I was trying to grab a pen and oops.
Just a stupid little cut.
Sure. Of course.
What, exactly,
are you going to do to me?
- Do you want us to stop?
- No, no...
I'm absolutely sure of myself.
Sorry, I have to take a little break.
I mean... A bathroom break.
Well? The fur?
What does the analysis say?
Since Doc has a bandage on his arm,
can we finally confirm
that he's behind all this?
Only 85% done.
It's running slow, but I don't know why.
How's Mia?
I have good news for you.
The operation could be canceled.
Really? How do you know?
Come on. We don't have time
to wait for the results.
We have to find a VCR
to play this tape.
I have an idea.
Sorry, Doc,
I think this is going to take some time.
My dear Supreme, I'm so very sorry.
I believe we are gonna have
to reschedule your operation
for another day.
You can return to your room to rest.
What are you looking for,
honorable clients
who have honorable money?
We are looking for a VHS player.
Wouldn't you like the Qing teapot?
Or perhaps the Ming vases?
A Yuan nail cutter? Honorable
consumer with loads of money.
- Wait. Maybe... the vase?
- No thanks, just the VHS player.
But you may not have one.
We're out of here.
Wait! Honorable clients...
Who are as impatient as a truck driver
at a stop light.
We must have what you are looking for.
A Pony VHS player, with double
player heads, Pal and secam!
We'll take it. But we'd like to test it
out by watching this VHS tape first.
- Of course
- The client is king in our store.
We will, however, raise the price
by 500 Yuans for the use of electricity.
- Alright... Ok...
- But we can't let you leave...
Without an honorable Tamagotchi
which has been alived since 1998.
Oh, yeah? Here, let me see that.
I'm interested in the Tamagochi.
- Is it on? May I begin?
- Yes. We're rolling.
Look at the date!
This was 20 years ago.
Hello everyone.
My name is Balthazar Poliakov
and this is my video diary.
I am on Mammoth Island,
a large island off the cost
in the Oriental Sea.
The last mammoth specimens
are found here.
But, as you know,
global warming has caused
the Earth's temperatures to go up
one degree every year
with dramatic consequences.
First of all, the mist that regulates
their climate is becoming rare,
and the mammoths are disappearing
little by little.
I am here to save them,
thanks to the X-1 Experiment.
It is a particularly ambitious project
that may change the world
as we know it.
With the help of my colleague Malik,
we have created this amazing machine,
which runs on Radiuzite.
The Analysis! It's almost done.
Come on, Hector! Pick up! Pick up!
Now, I would like to present you
with the results obtained...
- Sorry, sorry...
- Seriously? You're such a kid.
An unknown caller
It's Mia! Mia? Mia?
Hi! It's Mia! It's Mia!
A super well-known girl is calling
me as an unknown caller.
Hector, the analysis on your computer
is almost finished.
- What? What is the result?
- Hold on, it's still analyzing. It's...
My batteries are dead.
Do you have a charger
for a Smartphone 12?
Alas, no, honorable client.
That equipment is too recent.
But we do have an adapter
that will let you play Pong...
In Europe.
Let's watch the end of the video.
Alright. My friend Malik
is getting ready to start the process.
Our goal is to create a micro-climate
on the island
to cool down the atmosphere.
I have high hopes of succeeding,
thereby saving the mammoths.
For the moment,
this machine only generates cold.
The radiuzite
is a very unstable element.
But in a few years we will be able
to completely control the climate.
We may even be able to stop
the glaciers from melting,
stop the tornados from hitting,
and protect our planet
from atmospheric pollution.
Alright, Malik. We're ready!
It works! It's marvellous!
What's going on?
The climatosphere! It's saturated.
No! De-active the system!
Get back! It's coming right at us!
A mammoth!?
What? Doc is a bear? This is ridiculous!
Mammoths are extinct.
Hi. You've reached Hector.
If I don't answer,
it's probably because you are calling
during my episode of
"Honey and Honeymoon".
Leave a message
or call back in 25 minutes.
Ok. Look, look.
This time it's as clear as water.
Doc exterminated
the mammoths 20 years ago.
And now, he is using the Radiuzite
to exterminate the rhinos.
Get it? This guy is crazy.
We have to stop him!
Yes. He and... all his accomplices.
Right! We have to tell
the Captain immediately.
Well, well...
Speak of the elephant in the room?
Very well... I know him.
Everyone thought he was dead.
After having exterminated
the last mammoths,
he is organizing this terrible
assassination plan against the rhinos.
He must be stopped.
Vladimir, Hector, excellent work!
I'm giving you a promotion.
Okay, this is very serious. We must
prepare an attack on the hospital
to put this Demon of the Cold
and all his acolytes behind bars.
Of course. But we still have to identify
the third man who attacked the platform.
We have no clues to his identity.
No half measures, Willis.
Arrest everyone!
We'll solve that problem later.
Program the mission for today.
We are going to intervene
with all available agents?
Not here
Dumb, dumb...
How could I have been so dumb?
Excuse me! You are so... what now?
Did I hear you correctly?
- What are we going to do now?
- You're asking me?
- Well, well, things have changed.
- Yes, they have.
There is something
I just don't understand...
Why did Kung and Fu move the rhino
to the basement?
Do you think they know that
The Demon of the Cold wants to kill him?
Why is Doc's team stealing Radiuzite?
We know that Cap was on the platform
with Doc at the time of the theft,
but who was the third person?
You can ask Doc yourself
as soon as we find a way out of here.
He's really bad.
That level is so easy...
Forget your video games for a second.
Concentrate on our plan of escape,
will you?
Well, well, well. Vladimir Willis...
What a surprise...
- You guys know each other?
- I was the guy who sent him here.
- Well, that's a piece of bad luck.
- Willis. Poor little kitten...
I'm going to make dog food out of you!
- Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait!
- What do you want?
Your video game, there.
Are you going to finish it?
I can help you with that?
- Yes! Yes! Yes!
- No! No! No!
- Yes!
- No, no!
Bravo, Rat! Very impressive!
You really aced that game!
Okay, now it's time to leave.
Leave? But how?
I didn't want to escape
before finishing the game
but I have the map of the prison
tattooed on my back.
Look! We'll be out of here
in less than two seconds flat.
Well, turns out that cheetah
wasn't so bad, was he?
He was very sporting
to let us escape with him.
It's also very sporting of him
not to hit you in the face!
Ok. Let's go to the secret floor.
Doc might be there.
Okay, be honest!
This is, without a doubt,
the best series of all time!
Chlo? Chlo! It's you!
You're the third man from Doc's gang.
Yes! Also a former member of
The Agency, expert in martial arts!
You came to arrest me?
How arrogant can you be?
Do you think I don't know
who you really are? Rex!
You... You knew I was an agent
from the beginning?
But I didn't think you were stupid
enough to believe we were criminals.
But why do you want the Radiuzite?
Wait. Are you working
with The Demon of the Cold?
If you want answers to your questions,
follow me!
You see? We're not criminals.
We're not proud of attacking you
to steal the Radiuzite,
but we needed a very powerful energy
source to continue our research.
We didn't have a choice.
The future of our planet is at stake.
- My hero!
- Hey! Hi, Doll!
Come in, sirs, don't be afraid.
Our big dream is to end global warming
so that all races
will be able to survive.
Here, we can finally control
the world's climate as we like.
Have you been doing this
for the last 20 years?
Yes! Since the accident
on Mammoth Island,
there hasn't been a single day that
I haven't hated myself for my mistakes.
They cost so many people their lives.
An entire species disappeared.
I hid myself here,
in the most complete anonymity
to spend the next 20 years
learning to master the Radiuzit,
to control the Earth's climate.
But the mammoths haven't disappeared.
Captain Kotor is a mammoth.
He's the one who attacked the rhino
and tried to blame it on you.
He's a mammoth?!
He attacked the rhinoceros?
For revenge?
That's really a twisted plot.
We have to leave here now.
Members of The Agency
are on their way to arrest you.
I don't care what happens to me.
But I want your sincere promise
to protect all my patients.
I promise!
Are you ready, guys? Forward!
Go! Go! Go!
The Agency is making a huge mistake!
Well, well, well!
They aren't the ones killing the rhinos.
It's Captain Kotor!
He's behind all this!
He's The Demon of the Cold!
Captain Kotor? And am I supposed
to believe your word on this?
Don't do anything stupid, Vladimir!
Get back in line and do your duty!
- We came here for the bear.
- I choose to stay... with my friends.
Very well. You give me no choice.
Arrest them!
Not bad, Vladimir... Not bad!
But not good enough for me!
You've watched too many films, Mike.
Let me bring you back to reality.
Where did you learn to fight like that?
I grew up in Shaolin Temple.
We're not done here, Vladimir!
What do you think?
We're just going to let you go
because you knocked me down?
Capture them!
- Sorry Doc, we did all we could.
- I know. Thank you!
- We will fight to the end!
- Charge, spies!
Charge, spies!
That's right!
- Thanks!
- The pleasure is mine.
Cap! Here I am!
They're all innocent...
I'm the one you want.
Take me!
My whole family was innocent too, Doc!
The elders were naive.
They thought you could save us.
They had blind confidence
in your pretty words about technology.
But my father was cautious.
It all seemed too good to be true.
I wanted him to be wrong, but...
Do you know how it feels?
To see your entire race
disappear in seconds?
Immense pain!
Immense, unbearable pain!
It was an accident.
I've hated myself all these years.
Every night since that night,
I am haunted by nightmares.
- I am so, so sorry...
- I don't care how sorry you are.
- I want you to feel the same pain I do.
- Don't move! Hands in the air!
Can someone explain
what is happening here?
Cap... Captain?
You're the Demon of the Cold?
You talk too much?
It's time to finish this now!
You are going to see all of your friends
disappear in a few seconds!
We won't let you get away with this!
Can't wait to see that!
The only way to get rid of him is
to neutralize the radiuzite on his back.
No! Chloe!
No! Hector, my pal!
Is that all you two are capable of?
Very disappointing!
Demon of the Cold,
attack someone your own size. Me!
Mind your own business, Princess!
I am here for my friends!
I order you to surrender, immediately!
You order me? All by yourself?
My sisters will take care of you!
You're not a very good actress,
The Agency has scrambled
all transmissions in this perimeter.
It is impossible for you
to communicate with your swarm.
Scramble whatever you want.
I have a pair of antennae.
I see all your sisters have arrived.
- What are they doing?
- Waiting for the others.
- How many sisters do you have?
- Thousands! We are thousands strong.
Girls, clear the way!
Sister, clear the way!
No one moves!
Or I shoot!
Captain, wait!
Before you do irreparable damage,
I would like you to meet Melissa.
How? How did you survive?
It was Doc. He saved my life.
He's a good man.
- Doc? Are you sure this will work?
- We don't have a choice.
You did it, Doc
You're awake! How do you feel?
I'm okay. I'm alright. And the others?
Don't worry.
They're all here and they're all alive
- Your hair is a mess.
- Rest now. Rest!
You saved us.
I owed you one, Mike.
For all the trouble I caused
chasing those cheetahs.
I guess we're even.
- Oh no!
- He's been seriously injured.
- I don't know if he'll wake up.
- He's not breathing.
No! No, no!
You can't go anywhere my friend!
Not after all
we've been through together.
Come on!
Calm down, Vladimir.
I've already tried that.
Wake up, Hector!
I'll watch Mia's series with you!
I'll play video games with you!
We'll eat pizzas together!
Even the four cheese!
I promise I won't make fun
of your ring tone any more.
Wake up, Pal! I need you!
What did you just say?
I didn't quite hear you?
Hector, you're alive!
My cute little rat!
- Did I miss anything?
- No, it's just beginning.
Mia has really become a big star,
hasn't she?
Yes, but has anyone seen Hector?
He's going to miss the big premiere.
- Haven't seen him.
- Haven't seen him either.
That's strange?
Good evening, Mia!
You are the revelation of this film.
Everyone agrees that your performance
as a spy is stunningly realistic.
Do you have a special gift?
Well, in fact, I worked with
a real-life super agent.
Real secret agents?
What do you mean by that?
Ok, I'm calling Hector.
I can't believe he's missing Mia on TV.
That's weird. I can hear that stupid
ring tone of his, but I don't see him.
Vladimir, the ring tone
it's coming from the TV!
I think someone forgot
to turn off his cell?
Hello? Vladimir?
Hector? Where are you?
Mia's conference has started.
Vladimir! Can you see me?
Hello! Vladimir?!
Mia asked me
to be her bodyguard for the evening.
Sorry, sir! A call from my best
friend. He's watching the conference.
Looks like a love story
is about to begin.
Just one love story?
Looks like two to me.
- Indeed. It's invariable.
- Yes, invariable
- I understand it's a bit crippling.
- It is. Especially at night.
Would you mind if we give it
another try?
Please. Go ahead
- Indeed. It's invariable.
- Invariable.
Come in, please.
- Hello, doctor.
- So? How can I help you?
- I've got a bit of a size problem.
- Well, let's take a look, shall we?
You see, I can't find a girlfriend,
because my antlers are to small.