Stardom (2000) Movie Script

[dog barking]
[sniffling]
- Come on, sweetie...
- Can't believe this bullshit!
- Diane, please.
- All he ever did
was yell at you.
You're not fast enough,
you're too afraid
to get into the corners.
You're a wimp!
That's all he ever said.
- Diane!
That's enough!
- Wake up, stupid!
Right now,
he's drunk in some bar
a thousand miles away,
and he's not coming back!
- Diane!
I said enough!
- I miss him.
- I wish you would stop
being so tough on her.
- Gimme a break, Mom.
She's 18, okay?
She's got no dad,
I'vegot no dad,
and you've got no husband.
So what else is new?
[horn blaring]
- Come on, guys!
Let's do it! All right!
- Go guys! Whooo!
[excerpt from
Verdi's La Traviata]
- Hey! Say cheese!
[whistling blowing]
- My guests today
are Bernie Placek
and Stan Vronik
of the Lion's Club.
So, you guys gave away
your annual athletic
achievement award last week.
- Uh-huh.
- Yes.
- And...
this year's recipient was...
Cornwall collegiate vocational's
big number 17...
left-winger Tina Menzhal?
[clearing throat]
- Yes.
- And she's the daughter
of Merak Menzhal,
who used to be
with the Aces, right?
And you guys brought
some videotape of the event,
so why don't we look at it now?
Here we see Tina
coming out of the school.
Unfortunately there's no sound.
Right guys?
- No.
- You didn't switch on the mike?
- No...
- No.
- Here she is coming home.
She's obviously very happy.
She's very happy.
As she should be, very happy.
And there's her mother,
very proud!
- Oh yeah!
- Yes.
- And her sister.
Somebody told me
she wants to be
some kind of a scientist?
- Yeah.
She's the one with the brains.
[pop music]
- Oh yeah! Oh yeah!
That was Too Many Cooks!
That was their latest!
Follow me! Is this band hot?
I think so!
Now talking to Michelle Walker
from the Icon modeling agency.
Who's brought us some pictures
of new hot things!
Who's this face, Michelle?
How's it going? What's up?
Come on! Tell us about this!
This is the new hot thing?
- Well, this picture was sent
to us, believe it or not,
by a sports photographer
from Cornwall.
- You're kidding me?
- No, I'm not.
- And, like,
you pay finder's fee
for a girl like this!
- Yeah, we do. Mm-hmm.
Of course.
- Well, they began
by offering me 250 bucks.
Which was... disappointing.
- Well, what were you
hoping for?
- I told them I heard stories
about how some guys
were getting,
like, three percent
of all the girls' earnings
for five years;
something like that.
- And what was their reaction?
- They laughed.
- Okay, all right.
So this girl comes to town
and we wanna cover this story!
Now would somebody
please explain to me
why every cameraman
in this joint
is ready to kill his own mother
to get that assignment?
What's your problem? Okay,
so she's gonna become a model!
Big deal! What's your problem,
boys? Grow up! I'm not pretty
enough for you?
Anyways, Benoit won the dogfight
and here's what he brought back.
Have a look!
Come on and follow me
to the other side
Come on and follow me
to the other side
Come on and follow me
to the other side
Come on and follow me
to the other side
Yeah
- Yes, Philippe, I know
you don't detest, Philippe.
I know this!
Listen, Michelle thinks
we have something here.
I think we have something here.
Do you understand
what I'm saying?
You don't want me to send
this girl to somebody else...
You gotta trust me
on this one, Philippe.
Am I getting through, here?
You want to test this girl...
Tina.
- What are you going
to do to her?
- You got to wash
and polish her.
Make her... Make her shine.
It's a sizeable investment.
- You think she's worth it?
- Oh yeah...
The world always needs
another blonde.
- She's not blonde.
- On the outside.
[techno music]
- I have a tattoo.
- Let me see.
Anything else
I should know about?
- No.
- Take off your bra, please.
Is this God's work?
- Mm-hmm.
- I hate God.
- Marek was 18 when he escaped
from the Iron Curtain.
He was a very good
hockey player
but, for some reason,
he wasn't able to make it
to the show.
We went everywhere...
Halifax, Indianapolis,
Tulsa, Charlotte...
And then here.
- Sounds like a tough life.
- Yeah.
And when they finally traded him
to Cape Breton,
he just cracked.
- You haven't heard from him
since then?
- No.
The girls, they were devastated,
especially Tina.
She still wears
his old team jacket.
- How did you manage?
- Well, you know,
it was very hard
at first, but...
Now Diane has a scholarship
and Tina was offered
a job in Montreal.
First, she didn't want to go,
you know, but I made her realize
that I wasn't gonna be able
to support her indefinitely.
We miss each other a lot,
though.
- Well, Anne...
That was absolutely wonderful!
Don't go away!
We'll be back in a moment
with doctor Evelyn Liu
author of
Frigidity: Curse or Blessing?
[mooing]
- This country is drowning
in milk.
Whole milk. HDT milk.
Powdered milk.
The surpluses are staggering.
Analysts calculate
that if the per capita
consumption of ice cream
were to be increased
by only one cone/person
per week,
the milk surplus
could be reduced by 21%
in the first year alone.
So how do you get people
to eat more ice cream?
You advertise.
- You gotta grab
their attention.
Address the hidden desires.
Like Haagen-Dasz did in England.
Sex and ice cream.
Ice cream and sex.
- But we're not doing sex, here.
Our Canadian women's focus group
didn't appreciate the sex thing.
- So, I mean, it's more:
fun and ice cream.
Ice cream and fun.
- Philippe Gascon is the
award-winning photographer
who was picked to turn
the ideas of the creative team
into eye-catching advertising.
Every detail is thoroughly
discussed and studied.
When you're working
at this level,
nothing is left to chance.
- It's zero hour!
And right here, right now,
this is the moment
and the place to be!
Barry Levine's new happening:
Italasia!
Whoo-hoo-hoo! Here's red hot
fashion photographer
Philippe Gascon!
And guess what?
As usual, he's with another
pretty girl I'm ready to hate!
- Hi, Michelle, this is Tina!
- Whoo-hoo, she's gorgeous!
Where do you find
these creatures?
- Well, she came knocking
on my door!
- No, no, no!
Tell me, it's not that simple!
- Well, actually...
- Okay, I'll tell you what...
why don't we knock on this door
and join the party! Right?
And you can come with us!
Barry, you've done it again!
This place is red hot!
And who are
these other beautiful people?
- Michelle, this is
my wife Ruth, my son David
and my equestrian champion
daughter, Monica.
- Nice to meet you.
- Barry Levine,
what's your secret?
- Oh, it's no secret, Michelle.
Right place, right cuisine,
foremost the right atmosphere,
the right people.
You want a certain mix.
A few American movie stars
when they're in town,
sports celebrities,
media people.
Business personalities...
Obviously, a few models.
You're looking for a subtle
combination, a very elusive one;
one that says, "Hey!
This is going to be the place
where things are happening,
this is gonna be hot."
- I'm very proud of Barry
because his priorities are
in order.
You know? His children,
his family, his home...
you know, there's more
to Barry than the glitter.
And I'm the one who knows that.
And that makes me very happy.
- Thank you
for this wonderful moment, Ruth.
- You're welcome.
- We're really Barry Levine
groupies.
When he had the Express,
we were there all the time.
And then...?
- Ovation!
- Yes! And now this place!
It's really... it's--
- I have got to tell you
I love your jacket!
- Oh. Well, it's a long story...
- How about the sashimis,
Philippe?
- Well, uh... oh!
The arrangements are so perfect!
You hesitate to take one!
- And how about you?
- This is a little weird, I--
- Barry! Barry! This girl is
calling your sashimis weird!
- No...! It's just...
- Well, that's the advantage
of being beautiful.
You can say anything you want
and get away with it.
- Oooh...
[loud rock music]
- Bonsoir!
- I'm sorry,
I don't speak French.
- Nobody's perfect.
But I think you are very close.
I saw you coming in
with this guy.
Is he your... boyfriend?
- I can't talk.
Vous pouvez vous asseoir ici.
- So?
Are you ashamed of this man?
Is there a dark secret
you want to share with us?
- Well, I'm not supposed
to be seen with him.
- Why? Because
he is too old for you?
- Well, it's like
if other photographers knew
I was with him,
they wouldn't hire me.
- We won't tell.
- Yeah, right,
now the whole world knows.
Look at him! He's laughing!
I'm toast!
They're gonna send me back
to Cornwall,
thank you very much!
- Come on!
You're going to Paris!
- Paris? Paris, France?
My God!
But... you don't speak French!
- I know a few words...
- Say one.
- I can't.
They're all dirty words,
I think.
[laughter]
- I know this one, vicieuse.
He likes it when I'm vicieuse.
Do you know
some other words?
Please speak French to me.
- Paris, eternal city of lights.
Capital of fashion,
citadel of bon got.
And what could be further
from the dark satanic mills
of England's Midlands
than this luxurious
htel particulier.
The quartier gnralof
Wolverhampton's own Nigel Pope.
Britain's latest
fashion buccaneer
to broadside the world of
Parisian haute couture.
[screaming]
Nigel is brash, abrasive,
sometimes even cruel.
He is mad, bad
and oh, so dangerous to know.
Collaborators are often reduced
to tears, but they forgive him
for the sake of his genius.
- La, la, la! That's fun?
This is fashion! Pick that up!
[techno music]
- Well, I mean,
the guy's just totally cool.
And he's so hot at the moment.
I mean the buzz is just
positively deafening.
This is the show of the week.
This is his moment,
and I want to be part of it.
I'd do it for nothing.
And I probably will
if he chooses me.
Which he will.
- The clothes, food,
houses, men...
It's top! Paris is top!
- I really hope they take me.
I could really use the work.
I've been here for two months.
It's a really tough city.
- Who did this, luv?
- Oh, I got this done
in Montreal.
Philippe Gascon?
- Am I supposed to know
who that is?
- Well, he's really number one,
up there.
- Is he your boyfriend, or...?
Is that too much of a clich
to be true.
- Well, I...
- O.K., look,
you walk for me.
- Here?
- Yes.
Walk. You know?
One foot in front of the other.
Repeat as needed.
- Thanks, luv.
I thought I told you
no more of this, okay?
Please! I'm begging you!
One more like that,
and you're fired!
Next!
- Can't fucking believe this.
This place is incredible...
I hate this fucking country!
Do you hear? I hate it!
I'm flying the fuck out of here
this afternoon,
if I have to turn tricks
on the street to pay
for my fucking ticket!
I'd rather go back
to fucking Cornwall!
- A familiar yet all grown up
Tina Menzhal
was back in Cornwall this week
following her whirlwind success
on the fashion catwalks
of Paris.
Although she makes fun of it,
proof of Tina's new celebrity
can be found
on every Canadian wall.
And after the finicky food
of Paris,
who wouldn't yearn
for the down-home taste
of the Cornwall barbecue
on Second Avenue.
Manager Nick Costas
was on hand to toast the ladies.
So, Tina?
We're all dying to know.
How was Paris?
- Well, it was
a real challenge--
- I just want you to know
that we are all so proud of you.
- Yeah. Well,
in this kind of work,
after you do a few months
in Montreal,
they send you to either Paris
or Milan to see--
- You went alone?
- Yeah...
- Pardon me for being indiscreet
and I certainly don't mean
to pry -
that is not at all
the style of this show
as I'm sure you're well aware -
but I'd like to ask you
if there's any truth
to the rumor we've all heard
that you were at some point
seriously involved
with a photographer
in Montreal?
A French photographer?
- You mean Philippe Gascon?
- I'm always looking for beauty.
My car is about beauty.
My pictures are about beauty.
And beauty is about youth.
Stupid people will tell you,
"Oh, there are beautiful
older people."
This is politically-correct
bullshit.
Old age might bring you wisdom
but, in my job,
we retouch everyone over 20.
- He was really great to be with
and he took great care of me.
But when I came back,
I found out he wasn't
the kind of person that...
You know? You'd want
to spend your life with.
- Because of the age difference?
- Oh, no.
No, I love older men.
No, I...
I... discovered... things.
- Things...?
- Well, he's a very
visual person.
Very into photography and video.
He liked to tape me.
- Oh, well, now,
this is very interesting.
In my practice
I find lots of couples
using videotapes
as an erotic aid.
- Yeah, but, it wasn't just me.
He had tapes of himself
with other girls
while I was away.
- Oh, dear...
- Yeah.
Like, with a hidden camera.
- Now, this is very unhealthy.
- I dunno...
I might be a little square--
- You know, Tina?
This is the kind of pain
that so many women,
our viewers, have access to.
- Some ex-girlfriends
have called me immature
and worst things,
but they said the same thing
about Picasso
and about every great artist.
Beauty is about sex.
That's why women
can't be great artists.
There's a hierarchy, you know?
Best artists are often gay men,
because they have
a woman's sensibility
and a man's sex drive.
Then you have heterosexual men,
then, lesbians,
half-men, half-woman,
and then, at the bottom,
heterosexual women.
When I see a new beautiful girl,
I start shaking.
Exactly like Matisse,
when he heard the footsteps
of a new model coming up
to his atelier.
Literally, I tremble
in front of her beauty.
That's the way I am.
I'm not gonna change.
No way.
I'm sorry. This is me.
Take it or leave it.
- Okay! That's another
$120 pledge!
Great!
Now we all know that Montrealers
are starved for good TV
that's worth watching
and worth paying for...
You want the Three Tenors
with Pavarotti?
You want John Tesch
at Red Rock with Yanni?
Well, they're all here!
On public television.
And tonight, we have
two very special Montrealers,
who've come down to help us
with your pledge.
Famous restauranteur
Barry Levine from Italasia.
I've eaten there
and it's absolutely heaven!
And the model Tina Menzhal
who obviously everybody
wants to speak to tonight.
Ah! Another $120!
Remember,
ask for Tina, and if you like
good food, ask for Barry!
[laughing]
- Bruce Taylor is the man
who lives his entire life
through the viewfinder.
When he's not shooting covers
for today's top fashion
magazines,
he's usually filming
obscure documentaries
on his favorite
avant-garde jazz musicians
or directing high-end
television commercials.
Like this one,
for Nakashimi's Liquid One.
Bruce! Can I ask you
a personal question?
- The rumors are false!
I am not marrying Cameron Diaz!
We just happen to be
very good friends.
- No, seriously! Including that,
how many cameras do you own?
- I'm afraid
that's too personal.
- Oh, come on, you can tell me!
- Don't ask! It's like having
too many shoes!
- Ha! Ha! Too many shoes!
Starring in this commercial is
hockey superstar Steve Bourque
of the New York Rangers
who is himself no stranger
to the world
of high-art photography.
Less than a year ago,
Steve appeared
in Charmed Bodies,
Bruce Taylor's portrait of
professional
and Olympic athletes.
Enjoy...
- I feel I have to stretch,
you know?
Whether it be film,
television or the media...
I mean there's only so far
you can go pushing Gatorade.
Not that Gatorade isn't
an excellent beverage.
- And spicing up the mix
for Liquid One
is stunning newcomer
Tina Menzhal
who's Taylor's latest discovery.
So tell me, Tina,
you must've just died
when you went in
to see Bruce Taylor?
- No, I didn't die--
- I mean, for somebody like you,
in your position, this is, after
all, the chance of a lifetime!
- Well, you never kn--
- Come on!
You must've been knocking
yourself on the head
saying, "Ah! This is my life!"
- Well, I knew I could skate--
- And you've also just been
signed by superagent
Renny Ohayon?
Ohayon from WCM
in New York City!
Talk about a Cinderella story,
ladies and gentlemen.
- Yeah...
- Yes!
- I never really get a chance
to leave my office
but I got a phone call
from my buddy Bruce Taylor
who said I had to come up here
and...
Oh, by the way, it's a lovely
city, very European charm.
Anyway, I met Tina
and we just clicked.
- Bruce Taylor sweeps into town.
I beg, plead and grovel
to get her an audition.
She gets the job,
but then turns around
and signs an exclusive with WCM.
Not only that, she also steals
my best booker.
Who's now running away
to New York with her. So, um...
What, you want me
to be smiling about this?
Thank you.
- Really, it's not a question
of this agency or that agency.
It's more a question
of potential.
Of opportunity, market size,
scope, range, global appeal.
All of this.
- Wow! So you're moving
to New York?
- Yeah! Me and Rosie on
Broadway, can you believe it?
[giggling]
- Yeah.
- The Montreal location
is only the first part
of this exciting project.
Early next week, stars and crew
will be moving to the Big Apple
for the final segment
of this glamourous shoot.
And of course, our cameras,
as always,
will be there for you.
Right now, this is Susie Tucker
for Fashion One
saying goodbye from Montreal.
And see you backstage.
Is it good?
Great. Thank you.
Bruce. Stop filming my schnozz
from the side, will you?
- Everything
all right here, boys?
- Yeah.
- Is everything okay?
- Good.
- Lots of peppers in that tub.
Make sure that pasta gets it.
- Here. I got this for you.
- Oh!
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, yeah. I'm okay.
- Could you sign this please?
- Yeah. What's your name?
- Chris.
- How old are you, Chris?
- Ten.
- Oh, man...!
- Playing hockey?
- Thanks!
- Keep it up.
Sorry.
- Hey! What is this?
Hey...
- How old is this guy?
- I don't care.
He listens to me.
He takes care of me.
- And he's not married?
- Yeah. But it's over.
- Do you live together?
- He wants to come with me
to New York.
- So he's getting a divorce?
- He will. But he still
wants to see his kids.
And I understand that.
- What's the guy gonna do
in New York?
- Well, this is a very
successful businessman.
I mean, you may not know him.
But here, he's on TV
every other day.
I don't know
what you think of him,
but he's not just a caterer.
He did that for me, basically.
But... No. He's got plans. And--
- Let's talk about you.
- I think--
- What are your plans
for New York?
- I don't know.
I don't know
what you're getting me into.
[tinkling music]
[classical music]
[woman whispering]:
- So Tina, tell us.
How do you like Broadway?
- Wow!
- Is it everything
you hoped for?
- Oh, much more.
I mean, what could I say.
This is the center
of the universe.
I love it. I'm so happy!
- Steve. Are you gonna show
her around?
- Whatever it takes.
- Ah. Watch out, big boy.
- Ouch.
- Bruce?
I mean, you must be ecstatic!
- Only idiots are ecstatic
about their own work.
This is a very difficult
environment to work with.
When it rains lemons,
make lemonade.
- That's... The true nature
of geniuses.
It's great.
- It is now official;
the super model is dead.
I mean honestly, I'm gonna die.
Literally, to die.
If I have to look
at one more picture
of the German
automated cash machine,
the all-American bore,
the English waif.
Come on, girls!
You had your moment.
And it was a long one.
God, was it ever!
But I think
you've overextended it.
So now, if you don't mind,
bye-bye.
We are going to finally move on.
We are moving towards collage,
sharpness, topicality.
A touch of androgyny.
A subtext of fitness.
While keeping an undercurrent
of seduction,
mixed with the ruthlessness
of someone
who is taking no prisoners.
I just love this look.
It's theirs.
But it should be yours, too!
[rock music]
- Fashionable midtown,
oceans of limousines,
beautiful people.
This is opening night
in New York, right?
Wrong. This new restaurant,
The Model Life, is not open yet.
Don't even try
to get a reservation.
But the owners are staging
pre-opening private parties,
the latest New York fad.
They call it a soft opening.
In there, everybody's either
famous or beautiful.
- It's not some commercial
strategy. Not at all.
We're just trying to respond
to the tremendous number
of requests we've been getting.
I mean, how can we say no
to Brett Easton Ellis's editor?
We can't. People nowadays,
they just don't wanna wait.
They want to be able to say,
"Oh yeah, the Model Life! Wow!
It's fabulous.
I was there a month ago."
Then, people'll go,
"I didn't think
it was open yet."
"No. I was there.
At a private party."
It means, I was on the inside.
I was backstage.
I mean... I think that's
the statement that people
are making here, tonight.
And we're sure glad
that they are.
Listen. The play is terrific.
Fantastic.
I want a whole lot
of people like you.
Hey, how you doing?
- This is fabulous.
- Thanks very much.
Hello. How are you?
How's the new record?
- Great.
- Fantastic.
We'll put it on the sound
system. Make sure I get a CD.
- I'm spending my life
on the ice,
being chased by toothless goons.
I need places to unwind.
This looks like it could be
one of those places.
- Are you the model
connection here?
- I don't know.
But I'm always impressed
with what Barry
can come up with.
I mean, this is--
- I think that we have created
that unique kind of excitement
which says,
"Hey! This is the place
where you have to hang out."
[chanting]
- Now, we will all join hands
and form a healing circle
for our sister Ruth.
Those of you at home
may touch your TV.
Ruth. Share your pain with us.
Ruth's husband of many years
has just left her.
How many years, Ruth?
- Seventeen.
- Let us feel your grief, Ruth.
And did he say
why he left you, Ruth?
- Oh, I know the slut. Tina.
I saw the bitch coming.
I want them dead.
Goddamn fuckers!
- Very good, Ruth.
Very good.
See this as a very
positive moment.
- Brooklyn erupted in violence,
last night,
but it didn't involve
Colombian drug dealers
or Bed-Sty area gangs.
Militant members
of the group TOTA,
The Total Devotion
To Animals' movement,
stormed a fur fashion shoot
on the waterfront.
- I'm from Bremen.
I know violence.
These people are crazy.
- I was recording Werner's
lighting position
with this when...
When they jumped us.
- Close again. And flash. Boom!
Take a picture. Shoot her.
Boom. Boom!
- Animal killers!
- Murderer! Animal killer--
[reporter]: $400,000
worth of furs
were destroyed in the attack,
as well as $80,000 worth
of photographic equipment.
Only one casualty was reported:
Samantha Burke, a romance
language major at Wellesley,
had her jaw broken
in three places.
[muffled sounds]
- We believe if you're fascist
enough to wear fur,
What can human life mean anyway?
- Yes.
- Fashion model Tina Menzhal
was questioned this morning
by NYPD detectives.
- Tina was raised
in the wilderness.
She's very, very concerned
with all forms of animal life.
In fact, her sister
is a biologist.
Very few people know this,
but Tina has Native blood.
- Isn't Menzhal
an Eastern-European name?
- On her father's side.
Her mother has Native blood.
Ojibway, I believe. Excuse me.
Excuse me.
- Hello again.
It's 10 minutes to 9.
We're talking
with Canadian UN Ambassador
Blaine De Castillon,
model Tina Menzhal,
and Irving Ujibugamu,
president of SARC,
The Sub-Arctic Renewable
Resources Corporation.
Now, Tina, they threw
the paint at you and then,
charged you with assault.
- Yes. I--
- You know, many people,
including other models,
are campaigning against furs.
- Ironically, these are
the same people
who decry the fade
of the native community.
Their political agenda
blinds them
to the fact that our
native people still hunt
and trap for a living.
- My feeling is that
no one has to wear fur.
Just as no one has
to eat meat. I just love--
- If I may, I think what
Miss Menzhal is saying,
is that wearing fur shows
a sensitivity
and a solidarity to the issues
facing Native Americans
and Canadians today.
- Do you agree, Mr. Ujibugamu?
- Emphatically.
[laughter]
- Fifteen minutes
to first outfits!
Fifteen minutes
to first outfits!
Fifteen minutes, girls!
Fifteen minutes, girls!
Fifteen minutes
to first outfits.
Fifteen minutes!
- Let's see what she looks like?
- I got so many good pictures!
- Please. I'm here
as a private person.
I'm just a fan. That's all.
- This is zero-hour.
This is the moment.
Every person in the universe
is sitting out there.
This is the show of the season.
[emphatic orchestral music]
[choir singing]
[applause]
[applause and cheering]
That was incredible.
What do you think, girls?
What a reaction!
It was amazing!
The colors, the clothing,
the edge,
the dangers, the aura, the vibe.
- I was very impressed
by the deconstructed elements.
I felt he really subverted
the notions
of collective animae.
- Come on. Let's get partying.
- I have to wait for Barry.
- No, no, no, no.
I saw him leave after the show.
We have to drink.
[laughing]
- Hey, Bobby? Nunzio.
Yeah.
We took the black chick
with the funny accent.
We got her?
Yep.
- Hey, babe. Where are you?
What do you mean, you just left?
I'm standing here waiting...
What?...
Ah. Ah, ah, forget it. Okay.
Well, I guess I'll go
to the restaurant, right?...
Okay. Fine. Fine.
Hey! Are you my car?
- My way of understanding
the world
is to shoot pictures of it.
So, right now, I'm following
this girl, Tina Menzhal.
And I'm shooting stuff
about her,
with her, around her.
- And you don't know
what you're gonna do
with this material?
- I don't have the vaguest idea.
- Why this subject?
Why this girl?
- Well, by following
somebody like that,
you hope to catch something
important of the mood,
of the spirit of the time,
I guess.
- The zeitgeist.
- Yeah.
- The superficiality
of our time.
- Yeah. Maybe.
You've got to remember
that superficiality
never killed anybody.
I'd take Andy Warhol
any day over Lennon,
Heidegger, Pol Pot.
You name them.
I mean, you may think
that Calvin Klein is shallow.
But the guy never
bombed Cambodia.
- You sit there,
looking like a million bucks.
And you ask us to believe that
your looks haven't helped you?
Give us a break here, lady!
Huh? Give us an even break!
- My problem isn't
with looking good,
it's with huge conglomerates
who conspire to impose
an aesthetic on women.
It's called the fashion
industry for a reason.
And I blame Conde Nast
and Renoir.
- Tina. You're a model
whose looks are your fortune.
What do you think?
- Well...
It's a very complicated issue.
Because--
- Come on, wake up!
You are part of the system.
I hate this attitude.
We're sisters in this.
- Freud said it all.
Anatomy is destiny.
- That is just too easy.
If just once,
you had the courage to print
the face of a real woman.
One like these women.
- Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
Are you calling my troops ugly?
[public booing]
- Listen. Every year, I try
to go with an every-woman cover.
And when I test the muck up,
the women's focus groups
hate it.
- Well, I've experienced
the incredible harm
people like you are doing
to millions of women.
I have seen the anorexia
and the bulimia.
- Mental illness has
nothing to--
- Beauty is a media conspiracy.
- Stormtroopers like you
have always hated beauty.
- What now? You're calling me
a lesbian?
Is that your best argument?
- Well, this guy is.
What did you say?
- Shut up, dyke!
- Oh well...
[applause and whistling]
- If the shoe fits, uh?
- Alright. You know what?
Fine. Fine.
This is an ambush.
I'm outta here.
[laughing]
- What's the problem, sister?
You're gonna run away, now?
You're afraid
of a little confrontation?
Not so sure of yourself, huh?
- Get out of my face!
- Real people, real reality!
- Let's get the hell
out of here!
- Ladies, you can't go out
this way.
- Out of the way, pal, now.
[alarm blaring]
- You think you could handle
being a super model for a day?
Well, let me tell you
that sometimes,
here at the WCM headquarters,
in New York City,
the pace can get
a little hectic.
On the day that we caught up
with Tina Menzhal,
she was already
being chased down
by award-winning photographer
Bruce Taylor,
who was spying
on her every move.
Tina, tell us.
Who's your friend?
- This is an old friend who
I never thought I'd see here
in a million years.
Philippe Gascon.
- Hi.
- Great. Okay, Tina.
We'll catch you later. Alright?
[mumbling]
[Philippe]: Fine, fine.
[Tina]: Yeah.
- You know, I'm here now.
And I'd love to do
some stuff with you.
- Uh-huh.
- Just you and me.
Something edgy, you know?
Get back to the real you.
- Yeah. Sure. Why not?
- Brilliant.
Just check with Rosie.
See if there's an opening.
- Hi, Rosie. How are you?
It's so good to see you.
- You, too. Listen,
Kevin Costner's people called
again yesterday
about that date thing.
They're gonna call back.
What should I say?
I could say anything
but you gotta tell me.
- I don't know.
- What do you mean?
- I really don't know.
- Bye, sweetie.
- It was great seeing you.
Thanks a lot for coming by.
- What do you want me to say?
- Anything. Make something up.
- What do you mean,
say anything. Make something up.
Tina! Hello!
- So that was Philippe.
- Yep. That was Philippe.
- I love the leather pants
with the leather jacket.
That really gets to me.
Like, "Guess what,
I'm a photographer!"
- I guess it's his statement
as an artist.
Not only am I photographer.
I am also the image
of a photographer.
- Oh, you guys are so fucking
toxic. You know that?
He was always very nice.
- Right. And now, he's gonna
run around New York,
trying to cash in
with a portfolio
full of pictures of you.
- No.
- I bet you.
- Fine.
[reporter]: We then follow Tina
on Broadway.
To a rehearsal
for the VHF fashion awards.
[dance music]
- Okay. Now.
This is not the set, okay?
There is no set right now. Okay?
The tape is where the set
is going to be. Okay?
You're with me so far?
- Uh-huh..
- Okay. So...
When you get to
this point here...
- This point.
- Yes, this point.
Christian Slater will join you
and you guys will walk
to the podium.
I'm not losing you so far?
- No.
- Okay. Good.
There's no podium right now.
But this is where the podium
is going to be.
And, uh... Oh yes!
That X mark over there.
That's where Madonna is.
She gets the award.
- Right here.
- But then if they can't
confirm Madonna,
it's going to, uh...
With the hair...
Gaby?
With the hair?
- Heather Locklear.
- Yes. Heather Locklear.
- Always the same seat.
- Is this too much information
for you?
Are you getting all of this?
- Yes.
- By the way, you look fabulous.
They're gonna love you.
- Barry. Experts are saying
that the life expectancy
Of a hot New York spot is
getting shorter and shorter.
They're saying 12 to 18 months.
Obviously, you disagree.
- Of course I do, Joan.
There are lots of hot places
in New York
that have been around forever.
- Such as?
- Well, I wouldn't wanna promote
my competition:
Keith, Jean-Georges, Daniel,
Sirio. But... look.
I-I-I will say this,
that we are, uh,
in a cycle right now.
But we do see the upswing.
All I can say is if you want
a reservation here next month,
you'd better make it tonight.
Because after now,
I can't guarantee anything.
- The normally rapid pulse of
traders and brokers was pushed
past the red line this morning
when they received
unusual and unexpected guests.
Super models Zermgard Skrudland
and Tina Menzhal were
on the floor
to celebrate their new
exclusive association
with Nakashimi,
the Japanese conglomerate.
Coincidentally,
Nakashimi went up
4.5 points today,
corroborating again
the juggernaut combination
of beauty and money.
- As far as endorsements are
concerned, the question is this:
do you want
a unified global image?
Or do you want to split it?
You can go for total artistic
integrity in the U.S.
and still push whisky in Japan.
Like Woody Allen used to.
Or still does. I don't know.
- As you know, Tina,
on our show, we sometimes like
to spring little surprises
on our guests.
- Oh God! I was afraid of that.
- We found someone
very special for you.
Why don't we just bring him out.
Please welcome, all the way
from Sydney, Nova Scotia,
Marek Menzhal. Tina's dad!
[applause]
Now, Marek...
You two haven't spoken for what,
seven years?
I'm sure there's a lot
you have to say to each other.
- I don't know.
- You don't know
if you have something to say
to your own daughter?
- No, uh...
I am sorry we have not spoken.
How things turned out.
But you know... Sometimes,
life is like that.
- Now, you left a wife
and two young daughters.
- They weren't that young.
- Tina. How old were you
when your father left?
- 14. Listen, can we stop this?
- It's understandable
that you're upset.
But I think it would be
so good for you and Marek
to share with our audience.
Marek, why did you leave?
- Uh...
Sometimes we have to move on.
You are not happy about it.
But... it's the only way out.
Uh, when I left my parents,
it was the iron curtain, no?
They thought they're not gonna
see me again.
But I had no choice.
I had to leave
to come to America.
- But then, America was not
a happy story for you.
- I didn't have a real break
over here.
- Tina.
How do you feel about this?
- It's never gonna be his fault.
It's always the coaches,
the other players.
- You try and--
- Getting married too young.
- Easy to say.
- Never wanting children.
- I didn't have
the chances you had.
- Chances?!
- Yes, chances.
- Getting slapped around
by a drunk?
- Shut up!
- Fuck you!
[disapproving murmurs]
- See?
- Nobody knows.
I'm walking around
with this hole in my heart
and nobody sees it.
Nobody gives a shit about me.
[indistinct PA announcement]
- They offered me $2,400...
plus travel.
I'm in no...
position to spit on it.
- Have you any idea
what it meant for her
to see you?
- Hmm? Hmm...
American television bullshit.
People crying all the time.
Half of my father's family
was shot at Theresienstadt.
The other half disappeared
in a gulag.
Never saw my father cry.
Life is not a picnic, Mister.
- Getting slapped
around by a drunk?
- Shut up!
- Fuck you!
[crowd murmuring]
- Obviously,
we'd have to bleep the "f" word.
But I still think
it's a moment of great TV.
- Gentlemen, I was in Europe...
taking care of the Tiger Woods'
brouhaha.
I couldn't keep an eye on Tina.
- Well, look. We can't be held
responsible for that.
- Of course not. But...
I am responsible
for the well-being
of all the members
of the WCM family.
Tina will be hurt by this show.
And we, as a family,
would prefer
that the show not air.
- Now wait a second here.
You have to be fair.
- Guys...
Remember
the George Clooney thing?
Painful for us. Painful for you.
Do me a favor, can the show.
- We have signed releases.
Any judge in the world--
- Gentlemen.
Before we go any further,
I don't see the need for
this negotiation to be recorded.
Please.
- Good afternoon,
ladies and gentlemen.
First things first.
The basics of sports &
entertainment management
is in talent identification.
One fundamental anecdote.
When they gave away
the first Nobel prize
in literature,
Tolstoi came in second.
The winner was a diminutive
French poet named
Sully Prudhomme.
War and Peace rings
a bell. Yes?
Sully Prudhomme, I'm afraid not.
If this is too obscure for you,
think of Michael Jordan.
Third-round draft pick
in the NBA.
The experts chose two other guys
ahead of the greatest player
who ever lived.
Rule one: never believe
the experts. They don't know
anything.
Rule two:
genius is invisible
to most people.
Ten years ago,
the hottest musical group
was Milli Vanilli.
Grammies, music awards,
triple platinum.
They were red hot.
Would you, at that time,
have picked... this little girl
to be the, uh...
future most popular singer
on the planet?
[murmurs]
Would you?
If you said yes,
congratulations.
You can start construction
on your waterfront
Palm Beach estate.
But if you gambled
on Milli Vanilli,
family rates are available
at Club Med.
Have a nice trip.
[students laughing]
- Why you?
- Me?
- You shot this video?
- Yes.
- Why did they ask you?
- Who knows.
- For a guy your age,
this is a real break. Right?
Awesome. Awesome!
Shrill Cemetery. I can't wait!
I can't wait. I have got
to see this now.
The brand new Shrill Cemetery
video. Come on, Vicky!
Roll the tape. Roll it!
[rock music]
[soft pop music]
- And in Colorado,
the beautiful people show
their stuff this week,
at the Annual Celebrity
Slalom for Bosnia.
And E.D.'s Tony Mill was right
at the finishing line.
[waltz music]
- Yeah, Tina!
- Tina. You were flying
out there today.
- It's so good to be out here.
I mean, it's such
a beautiful day.
We're just really lucky to get
this weather. It's awesome.
- You know, you work hard.
You have a wonderful family.
You have a successful business.
Everything in life is going
your way.
And you kind of start
to ask yourself, "Is this it?
Another 15, 20 years of this?
Then what?"
Heart attack? Colon cancer?
Then the whole eternity
wondering, "What if?"
- It seems you're describing
a classic mid-life crisis here,
Barry.
- Oh, I don't know about that.
I mean, I've never been strong
on self-analysis.
But when Tina entered my life,
I saw her as my last chance.
I truly did.
- But she wasn't yet
a celebrity at that point.
- Ah, no. She was just
this perfect, young angel.
- So you moved
to New York with her.
- Yeah. A very big move.
You gotta have
the right apartment.
And... You know, it's New York.
Gotta have
the right neighborhood.
You gotta furnish it. Then,
of course, she's off to Florida.
And... She's back
for only one night and...
back to the plane;
they got phones on the plane,
but you can't call her.
She has to call you,
and uh...
And, uh... Meanwhile,
I'm trying to run a business.
They call her all the time.
From Hawaii, Paris.
She laughs and talks
'cause she's with Bruce or Toni.
She's in Aspen right now.
So... Sometimes, you...
you gotta wonder, honestly.
You start to wonder, uh...
- Would you like
a glass of water?
- Uh, no. I'm fine. Thank you.
But of course, it's the summer,
so you gotta go to the Hamptons.
Everybody goes out
to the Hamptons.
But I have to stay in the city.
So I drive out there. And I've
been working the restaurants.
So, I drive back every night.
Go there and back. That's two
hours there, two hours back.
On the Long Island Expressway.
You know what a mess
that can be.
But, uh...
She likes to swim
and I love to watch
when they're playing volleyball
and swimming.
Having fun.
It's a very
exciting phase for her.
And... I'm enjoying it.
Enjoying it. Enjoying it.
- Barry... worships me.
You know? It's very touching.
- But you do sleep with him,
don't you?
- Oh yeah. But I'm usually
in bed by 9:30.
And he comes in from
the restaurant at two, three.
Sometimes the alarm goes off
and he's been up.
Made me this elaborate
breakfast.
But I can't have anything
but my cappuccino.
- Is the poor guy at least
being rewarded once in a while?
- Of course he is.
What do you think?
He just doesn't ask for it
very often.
- I was standing outside
of my public school,
in Holland Park,
smoking a fag when this geezer
comes up to me
with a Nikon
around his neck
and next thing I know,
I'm flat on my back on his futon
praying to God that the condom's
not gonna split.
Same as her story.
- No. There were guys
before Philippe.
- Guys!
- Yeah. Guys.
- Who, how many? Details?
- Just guys.
At parties and keggers.
- So this French guy Philippe,
he wasn't the first?
- Oh no. Some girls also.
- What?
- Once in a while.
- I can't believe this!
- I was a jock.
Summers, I played softball.
Dykes on spikes. You know.
- My best friend's a slut.
- Bruce. Can we see Toni now?
If that's all right with you?
After all, we are only paying.
Beat his chest with your fists.
That's it. Look here.
That's it. Oh yes. Let's see
those teeth now, Tex.
Let's see those black teeth.
Oh, they're horrible. That's it!
Now look for help from God.
Now look down. That's it!
Hold your hands up. Gasp!
Scream. Put your hand
in his face.
That's it. Push him away.
Push him away!
And a bit more teeth.
A bit more. That's it!
Flap your hands around. You're
the helpless maiden in distress.
High in the air. Lovely.
Oh, dear, you've lost your wig.
- Yes. Straight from Tucson
to Julliard.
Hello, Big Apple,
take a bite outta me!
Same class as Ethan Hawke.
[funk music]
- This week, on Celebrity Hunt,
Justin from Formingdale,
Long Island,
has a very juicy bit
of videotape
he wants to show us.
- Justin has become one of our
most important contributors.
So here he is to introduce
his segment.
- Thank you, Carmen and Adriana.
Every year, the Lupus Foundation
holds a costume ball fundraiser
which brings out the celebs,
and this year was no exception.
I was there as the stars
arrived and I struck gold.
So start your VCRs now.
- Tina! Tina! Over here!
- Please. Please, Tina.
- Look. We've got
all your pictures.
- We've been following
your career like forever.
- We're your biggest fans.
- You like red?
Bye now.
- We love you, Tina.
- We're your biggest fans!
- Barry? How could you?
- What?
- Do you know
what you've done to Ruth?
- What?
- What you've done
to your children?
You are a scumbag, Mister.
An asshole.
- Hey, you can't call me that!
- Let go of me, you maggot!
- Who the hell do you think
you are, you fucking cow?
- Hey, cows are sacred!
- You should be ashamed.
- Who are you to talk to her
like that. Leave her alone!
[inaudible dialogue]
- Told you it was juicy. At one
point, we were really excited
because we thought the guy
wearing the wig was
Alec Baldwin.
But it turned out
to be a nobody.
- But we still loved
the scene anyway.
- The heat was on in Aruba
this week for the shooting
of the all new Shan
swimwear collection.
And E.D.'s Kathy Lopez
has this sneak preview.
- The water may have been cool
but the action was red hot
as top model Tina Menzhal
and super hunk Paolo Solar
turned it on
for Shan and photographer
Bruce Taylor.
[Latin music]
- Look at her. Can you see her?
[sighing]
She's so fucking beautiful.
You don't know
how beautiful she is.
When she slides in bed
with you naked, you wanna die.
It just fucking kills you.
You walk into a room with her,
every man,
every woman wants her.
The president of the United
States wants to do her.
- Tina told me the restaurant's
not doing so well.
- Yeah. Well, I've been making
some fresh moves, man.
Restrategizing the whole deal,
you know.
- Your associates are not happy?
- Oh, you know, spineless
bean counters. Fuck 'em.
I'm gonna surprise
a lot of people.
Look at this.
- Man! You're outta your mind.
- Nice, huh? Surprise.
- Honey no. I can't.
- What? You don't like it?
- No. That's not what I said.
- You don't want it!
- No. It's beautiful. But...
- What?
It's not precious
enough for you?
- Ah!
- Hi again. It's Justin.
And it's late,
outside the Lava Club,
in Chelsea.
I'm waiting for big game.
[honking]
Okay. This is Tina Menzhal.
And she's with... Oh my God!
She's with Steve Bourque
of the New York Rangers.
[crowd talking indistinctly]
[door opening,
dance music playing]
Okay. Don't ask how I got in.
Don't ask.
[loud techno music]
The hunter never rests.
What the celebs forget
is that there's always
a camera.
Here we are, folks.
Scoop of the week.
Tina Menzhal and Steve Bourque.
Can you stand it?
[honking]
Tina! Tina!
[reporter]: 412 people,
including 300 innocent women
and children,
had their throats slashed
last night,
in Djelfa, Algeria,
110 miles south of Algiers.
Islamic fundamentalists
have claimed responsibility
for the massacre.
I'm sorry. This... This just in.
Super model Tina Menzhal is
at this moment
in the emergency ward
of Manhattan Central Hospital.
Are we live?
Berch. Are you there?
- Yes, Susan. Go ahead.
- Can you tell us what happened?
- Well, the story is still
a bit sketchy. But what we do
know for certain at this time,
is that Tina Menzhal was found
bloody and severely beaten
in the garage of
her Upper East Side high-rise.
- Do the police have
any suspects?
- Residents of the high-rise
said that the police did arrest
Menzhal's ex-boyfriend,
one Barry Levine.
Now apparently, he--
- Berch. I'm gonna have
to cut you off here.
We go now to Gia Solanes,
at the downtown police
precinct. Gia?
- Susan. The man being marched
into the station is
Barry Jonathan Levine.
He's a fugitive
from his native Canada
and has been arrested
for the brutal attempted murder
of super model Tina Menzhal.
[reporter]: What do they
want you for in Canada, Barry?
What do they want you
for in Canada?
- That's as far as you can go.
That's it.
- It seems that Levine
is a desperate man.
Right now, he is being
investigated
by the Royal Canadian
Mounted Police
on charges of defrauding
his former Montreal associates
of several hundred
thousand dollars.
And here in New York,
his partners in the now
defunct restaurant
have just brought charges
of embezzlement against him.
- Well, what the hell happened?
This chick was seen
and photographed
with a major sports star,
here, in New York.
I could name names here.
He shoots, he scores.
[crowd reactions]
Not exactly the virgin Mary
here.
So you know
what I'm thinking?
Maybe she had it coming. Huh?
[disapproving murmurs]
Maybe! Think about it.
Just think about it.
That's all I'm saying. Come on.
I'm not saying yes.
I'm not saying no.
Just think about it. Come on!
- Both Miss Menzhal and
Mr. Bourque are clients of WCM.
They've known each other
for a long time and
they're very good friends.
And since the Rangers
have already left
for their West Coast trip,
Mr. Bourque has asked me
to tell you he will have
no other comments
on this unfortunate tragedy
at this point and time.
Thank you very much.
That'll be all.
- Did the police talk to Steve?
- Is he a witness in this?
- Thank you.
- Well, I certainly didn't agree
with a lot of her choices,
and the choices
that were made for her.
In fact, I strongly reject
what she stands for.
But in moments like these,
we must close ranks,
and say to all
the women killers out there,
we know who you are,
and we will defend ourselves.
- Plato was the first
to state it,
"Beauty is a beautiful girl."
Beautiful girls are
a sub-species of the human race.
- And that justifies
beating them up, right?
- No. Of course not.
- But they are different
from ordinary people.
Nobody ever felt desire
looking at me.
- Sorry to hear that,
Professor.
[chuckling]
- You know, Tom,
most men are in this situation.
And while we may be happily
married, our experience of life
is radically different
from Tina's or Toni's here.
- Could you explain, Professor?
- One of the assumptions
of my book
is that it's extremely difficult
for a beautiful woman
to establish and maintain a
healthy relationship with a man.
[Toni]: This is nonsense!
Tina's the most well-balanced
person I know!
And I personally just met
a gorgeous rock musician
and we're madly in love.
What's the problem?
- Well, I certainly wish you all
the best but the fact remains -
and this is not a new theory -
in his famous essay
on narcissism,
Freud himself states--
- Oh please! Do we have
to listen to this hogwash?
[chuckling]
[reporter]: Family and friends
surrounded Tina Menzhal
this morning as she was released
from Manhattan Central Hospital.
[crowd and reporters clamouring]
- It seems he jumped her
from behind and crushed her
under his own weight.
She didn't stand a chance.
But you know, I've seen her
take some pretty wicked hits
on the ice.
She'll survive.
- We never knew
this Barry Levine. I mean, uh...
From Tina's phone calls,
it never seemed like a...
an important relationship.
We were surprised that
they were living together.
- Nestled in the most
exclusive quarter
of the Swiss countryside,
the Grauer Klinik caters
exclusively to royalty,
international financial leaders
and celebrities from the world
of show business.
Despite the legendary discretion
of the citizens of Grenchen,
there is a rumor
that American super model
Tina Menzhal
arrived on the 7:04
express train
from Zurich last night
and was quickly
chauffeured here.
Helmut Gruber.
[German]
[high-pitched aria]
- The season's hottest show is
called Tina-Philippe;
A Love Story.
This show chronicles
the discovery of super model
Tina Menzhal
by French photographer,
Philippe Gascon.
- A great model is not born,
you know, she's made.
Whether it's Steichen
or Western or Avedon,
there must always be someone
looking through the viewfinder
to provide the vision.
When I first met Tina,
she was a little hockey player
lost in Central Canada.
Nobody had really seen her
until I made my first picture.
- The exhibition will also
include a video installation
that addresses the artist's
subject appropriation
in a provocative
and deconstructive manner.
- I want to hold you.
- And I want to see you.
- I want to hold you
- And I want to see you.
- I want to hold you.
- And I want to see you.
- What are you doing?!
I asked you never to do this!
Philippe! Stop it! Stop!
Give it to me!
Stop!
- We certainly don't mind
sexiness, obviously.
But as far as full nudity
is concerned,
we recommend delaying it
until the last possible moment.
When you think of the great
careers of Marilyn Monroe,
Elizabeth Taylor,
they waited until the very end.
You certainly don't see
Julia Roberts or Meg Ryan
running around naked. Yet.
We see it as a woman's...
last weapon, so to speak.
That was all right.
- The arrival in Grenchen
of Canadian Ambassador
to the United Nations,
Blaine De Castillon,
here yesterday
by private helicopter
has raised many questions.
Is the Ambassador here
for the clinic's
famous Somerset Maughan
impotence treatment?
Or is he here to see
American super mega top model
Tina Menzhal?
We know that the Sultan
of Brunei has sent loads
of rare black orchids to Tina.
Is OPEC involved?
[reporters all talking]
- Mademoiselle!
- S'il vous plat!
- Merde!
- If your client is a woman
or a gay man,
you can assume
with 99% certainty
that there are nude photos
floating around somewhere.
- I know. I've shot them.
[Ohayon chuckling]
- You have to deal
with the situation.
There are no rules. You...
You do what you can do.
- Federal authorities swooped
down on the photo work gallery
and carted off photos
and videotape equipment.
They're acting on a writ of
seizure before judgement
brought against the gallery
and photographer Philippe Gascon
by the law firm of Smith,
Deutsch and Rosenthal,
on the behalf of WCM,
World Creative Management.
Photographer Philippe Gascon
was taken to La Guardia
to be deported to Canada.
Police there want
to question him
about thousands of nude
photographs of young children,
traced through the internet
to a web site he created.
- Look. I am an artist.
America is doing it again.
Like Melville.
Like Edgar Allan Poe.
You don't know what
I'm talking about, huh?
You don't know who Melville was!
Not big in the ratings,
Melville.
What about Mel Gibson?
Better? Good!
It's a frame, you hear me?
I'm framed!
Check WCM, and your friend WCM.
You'll see!
- Barry never talked
to me about money.
He just spent it.
- What about... Now, this is
going back to your birthday.
What about the weekend
in Anguilla?
- Weekend where?
- Anguilla. In the Caribbean?
- Is that where we went?
- You didn't know
where you were?
- It's always beaches
and palm trees, basically.
- Then there was a Tiffany
diamond tennis bracelet
and the black pearl necklace
from... from Harry Winston?
- I gave that to my mother.
- And you weren't curious at all
about how he could afford
these gifts?
- I told you,
money was never an issue.
I earn money.
I thought he had money.
- You never sensed
any desperation?
- I thought it was overwork.
- And he never
asked you for money?
- No.
- And you never
offered to help him out?
- No.
- Just what was the nature
of your relationship
with Barry Levine?
- Why don't you ask him?
- We will, Miss Menzhal.
But now, I'm asking you.
- What can I say?
It was fun.
It was all fun
until it was not fun.
I feel sorry for him...
Even after what he did to me.
- We'd like to submit
this tape deposition
as people's exhibit 27.
- Is that it? Is that it?
This is too easy.
That tape has been edited.
You guys edited that videotape.
- Order!
- Fuck order?
Bring the bitch in here!
I have the right
to confront her!
- I can't defend you like this.
- Shut up! You're fired!
- Please control your client.
- You listen to that?
She said it was fun?
I lost my business,
my wife, my kids!
- Officers!
- I adored my kids!
- Would you please escort the
defendant out of this courtroom.
- I lost my mind. I spent
every last fucking dime I had
on that bitch!
- Your Honor. According to--
- She wouldn't even give me
a fucking smile!
- Mr. Levine you're not helping
yourself at all.
- She's killed me.
The fucking whore!
- Your Honor. Would you allow me
to explain the--
- No matter what she said,
she's killed me.
Everyone knows. I'm a dead man.
[noisy courtroom]
- We are adjourned.
[gavel banging]
- America Online logged over
half a million hits in 24 hours
at an unauthorized web site
featuring super model
Tina Menzhal relaxing topless
aboard a yacht
owned by Canada's Ambassador
to the United Nations,
Blaine De Castillon.
The pictures were eventually
traced back
to the Italian scandal sheet
Oggi Ventura.
- And I can only add that the
dress code in the Mediterranean
is somewhat more relaxed
than it is
in the great Canadian North.
Thank you very much.
Oh. And let me clarify
one issue which, as usual,
you people have got
completely wrong:
Miss Menzhal is not
my girlfriend.
She's my fiance.
- Tina, Tina!
Par ici, Tina!
- Tina! Tina!
How do you like Paris?
- Well, the first time I was
here, it was pretty terrible.
But... This time, I mean,
what can I say?
This is the center
of the universe.
I love it. Thank you.
- Tina?
[reporters]: Tina, Tina!
- Tina, par ici!
- Tina. Is it true that
this medal was given to you
because Nakashimi,
the Japanese group,
gave 20 million francs
to the Muse
des arts dcoratifs?
- Tina.
- Well, I assume the museum
really needed the money and I--
- Stallone, Sharon Stone?
- I'm not getting this.
- They are saying that the...
Americans are laughing at us
because we gave medals
to Sharon Stone
and Sylvester Stallone.
- This medal?
- Yes.
- To Sharon Stone!
- Yes.
- And Sylvester Stallone?
- Yes! Can you imagine?
- Why?
- Because, mademoiselle,
it is a tragedy.
Our country is sinking in--
[indistinct French dialogue]
- I think we have
to regard the perfume
as a separate venture.
And on that alone, we wouldn't
go below 1.5 a year.
- What, francs or euros?
- U.S. dollars.
- Oh, come on!
- With option schedules
and performance bumps.
[scoffing]
- Fuck off!
- Fine. We accept.
- We accept?
- Yes, we do.
It's a reasonable offer.
You'll go on now and
find a creative way
of celebrating our new muse.
- Good.
- Is that an English word, muse?
- Right, luv. Now,
the first thing we gotta do
is pierce those nipples.
- Okay. And then, I get to bang
a nail through your cock, right?
- Would you?
- Where do you want
your pound of flesh delivered?
- Shannon.
- Oh. I thought you
were in Nassau.
- For North America only. Over
here, we're still in Ireland.
Although this may change
very soon, as you can imagine.
- Yes. Of course.
- We don't want one penny
moving through France or
the U.S. Especially the U.S.
- That goes without saying.
On our side, we have
several options, depending...
Excuse me.
Mr. Taylor. I think
you are forgetting your star.
Cameras are made to photograph
beautiful women
in beautiful dresses.
Do not lose your precious talent
that we appreciate so much
in Paris, on an old accountant.
Beauty is awaiting you.
- I think we have
an excellent deal.
- But nobody is going to pay
a cent of income tax.
- You say it
like it's a bad thing.
Listen. It's very simple.
Money is international.
Taxes are national.
- Oh...
- There is a discrepancy.
I live for discrepancies
like these.
- And it's totally legal?
- Of course.
- And safe?
- It has to be.
Look, Tina?
You make a worried face for me.
You see these lines?
They're a threat
to our fortunes.
And my job is to make sure
that these lines never appear.
[50s ballad by Connie Francis]
Evening shadows make
me blue
Cheers.
- To Paris.
- To Paris.
How I long to be with you
My happiness
Every day I reminisce
Dreaming of
your tender kiss
Always thinking
how I miss
My happiness
- Now, Mr. Ambassador and Tina.
I think we have a right to know.
How long has this been
going on?
- Well, actually,
we've known each other
for quite a long time.
- That's true.
- Can I ask where you two
first met?
- Yes. We met in a television
studio, in New York.
- A morning show.
Very unromantic.
- Was it love at first sight?
- I was so impressed by him,
I could barely open my mouth.
- And I found her
just stupendous. Amazing.
- Oh, please! I'd been working
all night. I was disgusting.
- Would you listen to her?
- I'm not on the rebound,
for Christ's sake.
You're treating me like I'm some
kind of emotional basket case.
- Tina, I didn't say that.
I just asked why him?
- I'm in love with him.
- I don't get it.
- Of course, you don't.
You never loved anybody
except your mother.
- Okay. Fine. So you love him.
But that doesn't mean that you
have to rush into this marriage.
- That's the way he wants it
and it's fine with me.
- What do you mean
"That's the way he wants it"?
- He doesn't want a girlfriend.
He wants a wife.
He made it clear.
It's either that or he goes away
and I don't want him to go away.
- Listen.
I've got a car outside.
In five hours,
we're in New York.
It's not a criminal offense,
you can still say no.
- Bruce. Blaine is an ambassador
to the United Nations.
- For Canada!
- In Europe, we stay in castles.
This man wants me
to share his life!
- Do you know the expression
"trophy wife"?
- This man discusses politics
with me. World affairs. He does.
I mean, you think I'm stupid,
but he doesn't. And- -
- Tina, I don't think
you're stupid.
- I had dinner with
the president of the World Bank.
He liked my point of view.
He said so. I'm being accepted
into a family. Okay?
A real family, with brothers and
sisters and uncles and nephews.
- And a first wife that
no one will talk about.
- Don't try to cheapen
everything.
Bruce, please. Be my friend.
Help me. Go away.
- We were having dinner
at their place.
And people were taking about
the Cy Twombly show
at the Whitney.
And of course,
Tina doesn't have a clue.
So right away, Blaine goes on
about Cornwall's collegiate
& vocational school.
- That's an asshole!
- So she runs upstairs crying
and he goes after her.
Seems every time she's crying,
he gets a hard on.
Next thing we hear
is him grunting.
I mean, he's doing her
right there and we're listening.
So 15 minutes later,
he comes downstairs
with this big smirk
on this face.
He's lucky I didn't have my gun.
I'd have shot his balls off.
- The man's fucking toxic.
- Have you tried talking to her?
- Yeah. Everybody has.
Even Tommy has.
Haven't you, honey?
- I sure did, honey.
- She's deaf. She won't listen.
- This isn't a matter
of me being difficult.
Tina's obligations
are contractual.
Nakashimi is not exactly
a noodle shop.
- I know that.
Who do you think I am?
- These are legal commitments.
Play ball with us.
- Look. It's not my problem.
Is it? I'm leaving
for Africa in one week.
And then, I'm going on
an extended tour of Europe.
And my wife is coming with me.
You're just gonna have
to deal with it.
My wife and I will not
disappoint our obligations.
- Listen... Sir?
[clearing throat]
- What the hell is going
on here? How did you get in?!
- Brucie!
- You have exactly 30 seconds
to leave this property!
- Blaine!
- Tina, I made it clear.
No press. No photographers.
We agreed. A private wedding.
- Bruce is not the press.
- Is it possible for you
to live without a camera?
Now you've said you could.
- You're hurting me!
- Do I make myself clear?
No cameras and no friends
with cameras!
[glass breaking]
[bells ringing]
- The international
spring season
that began with the polo matches
at Palm Beach, Florida,
draws to a close
at a South London suburb
called Wimbledon.
Women's tennis in particular
has become so fashionable
that it will be the subject
of a Vanity Fair piece
shot by none other than
that elusive, brilliant,
and so branch prince of
contemporary photography,
Bruce Taylor.
[Tina]: You booked this hotel
yourself, okay?
He booked the same hotel.
I had nothing to do with it.
No. Bruce is not with me.
Hello? Fuck!
Bitch!
[Bruce]: I was at Wimbledon,
yesterday.
- I know.
He went over to Cartier's,
this morning.
He laid this over my croissant.
He was very passionate.
- I don't like it, Tina.
- He's my husband.
- Well, I was there
for Tina Menzhal.
Pardon me,
Tina De Castillon.
I was there when we were
in Paris, starving,
with no work.
In New York
when her boyfriend beat her up.
She knows I'm strung out,
she knows it,
and she's cut me off.
I leave her messages
and she changes her number.
Her agent lies to me.
Her doorman won't let me in.
I just want to talk.
Look at me. Look at Tommy!
We need money and
she's turned her back on us!
- What do you say, Lady?
- Don't blame Tina 'cause
your boyfriend is
weak and stupid.
Tina didn't put
that needle in your vein.
Tina didn't cause you
to lose all your money.
I say, blame it
on your white trash boyfriend.
[applause]
- Don't you call
Tommy white trash.
- And, debuting in her dual role
as wife to a U.N. ambassador
and co-chairman of the Annual
Fundraising event,
is New York's own
Tina De Castillon.
- From Degas to Mondrian,
the museum is an open door.
An important answer
to the closing of minds.
Let us keep these doors open
for the future generations.
Thank you.
[applause]
I'm sorry to disappoint you
but it's really not as bad
as you said it was gonna be.
- Good.
- I mean, I'm not saying
that he isn't demanding.
But you have to be at his level.
His standards are
pretty tough but--
- Tina. There's someone
I'd like you to meet.
That is if you can tear
yourself away.
- You know, I was talking
to Bruce.
You could at least be
a little more polite.
- Forgive me, dear,
if I don't feel like
being polite to that freak!
As a matter of fact,
I would like it
if he didn't hang around you
so much anymore.
Do I make myself clear?!
- He's the only one here
who would talk to me.
- You are here with me,
you stay with me,
and if you want to talk
to someone, you talk to me!
What's that? Oh, Christ, Tina!
For God's sake!
- Leave it! It's for Bruce.
[The sound is interrupted.]
[no sound]
- Mr. Ambassador.
Is the damage from the acid rain
as extensive here in Colorado
as it is in the rest
of the North East?
- That's what we're here
to determine.
The United Nations
biodiversity project's mandate
is to identify
potential environmental hazards
before they reach
the critical stage.
- I see. Mrs. De Castillon,
do you share
your husband's interests
in the environmental issues?
- Do you want a real answer
or is the ten seconds up?
- No, we are live.
There is no cutting away here.
- Oh. Good. Then,
let me tell you something.
This is the last place--
- What Tina means is
that tourism--
- How do you know what I mean?
- It's obvious, Tina,
the environmental--
- Will you stop interrupting?
- I'm trying to help you
formulate--
- Listen. Why don't you go
formulate over there
with your friends.
Go put your ass in the hot tub
with that jerk from Disney.
- Would you excuse me, please?
- What was that question again?
- Mrs. De Castillon?
Or Menzhal. Tina Menzhal.
- What took you so long?
- Baby. Baby, you're bleeding.
You're full of blood.
- Don't worry.
This time, it's not mine.
- What happened?
- Bruce. What the fuck
are you doing here?
There's a media alert out there.
Media alert!
Right now, you should be looking
for a minor diplomat
with a very flat nose.
- It's okay.
It's okay. It's alright.
- Ti, I made an investment
in you.
So has Renny. And Rosie.
- Whatever she wants to do
is okay with me.
- I'm tired, Bruce.
I need to go away for a while.
I have to.
- Purely hypothetical, right?
A U.N. ambassador.
A young wife who's not happy.
She want out.
Is there another woman?
- No.
- Alright. So they're fighting
and he says to her,
"Go ahead and leave. But here's
something to remember me by."
So he jumps her
and he tries to rape her.
You mentioned something about
sodomy. Was that successful?
- It's not clear.
- The young lady was an athlete
at some point.
So she fights him off.
Grabs a lamp.
Bonks him on the head.
End of story.
- Nothing you can do.
- Resident aliens.
Witnesses won't press charges.
No police report.
Diplomatic passports.
U.N. is a bag of maggots.
[clamouring]
- The ambassadors of Turkey,
Bangladesh, France and Germany
all left Ottawa today
for their respective countries,
following a rambling and
disjointed outburst last night
at the United Nations Social
and Economic Council,
by Canadian ambassador
Blaine De Castillon.
- Do you think
our Manitoba farmers care
about Serbs and Croats?
I don't think so.
We have troops
in Laos and Cambodia.
Are we that fond
of little yellow people?
Not really.
The Golan Heights.
The Gaza Strip.
Rwanda. Haiti. Bagdad.
Every hell hole on the planet,
we're there.
And you think we like it?
I've got news for you. We don't.
We've been on Cyprus
for the last 35 years
trying to pacify
these Aegean assholes.
Come on. Cut the crap.
No one in this room
really gives a shit
about Turkey. Come on.
Give me a break here!
I wanna see hands.
Who likes Turkey?
If you ask me,
I'd take the Greeks any day.
At least, they were
civilized once.
Hey, where are you going, honey?
Come here. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
Slice over a
piece of East India.
And what do you get?
Why the hell are we sending food
to Bangladesh for?
These bitches haven't missed
a meal in decades.
Where is everybody going?
Let's get started.
Our understanding at this point
is that Ambassador De Castillon
was the unfortunate victim
of an unwitting
and debilitating
cross-medication.
As was quite evident,
the Ambassador suffered
a very serious skiing accident
in Colorado, a few days ago.
[reporter]: Meanwhile,
Ambassador De Castillon was met
this afternoon
at Toronto Airport
by members of a medical team
from the Royal Neurological
Institute.
[camera clicking]
- Do you know what
I'm feeling right now?
I am feeling tropical heat.
I am feeling Spiderwoman.
I am feeling Xavier Cugat.
Yma Sumac. Yes!
I am feeling Caribe Lobos.
The wild orchid of the Amazon.
Oh yes, we are talking mud,
ladies, earth.
Wind. Twigs. Leaves.
Texture, texture, texture!
Then... Walk away!
- At Indigo, former model
Tina Menzhal
Was signing her new book
Hot Buzz.
Which tells of her years
as an international jet-setter.
The book, written by Tina
with Bobby Veau,
tells of the years of
struggle and success.
- Well, the autobiography I did
with Donald...
Sutherland...
spent four weeks on the Canadian
bestseller list.
So, uh, like Donald,
Tina's story is a story
that really has to be told.
[dance music]
- This is a design
reminiscent of what Tom Ford
is doing at Gucci.
- So, Tina. How do you decide,
you know, like,
what people like?
- Well, I've been involved
in fashion for a long time.
I was a model.
- Really. Where?
- In New York. Paris.
- Way cool. Tell me.
Do you miss the action?
- Yeah.
Sometimes, I really do.
- Oh. I'm getting
that signal again.
Here's something our director
used to dance to
at these things called raves?
Anyway, here's
Hootie and the... Fish?
He's so serious about
these things. Check it out.
- The annual Cerebral Palsy
Marathon was run in Cornwall,
yesterday.
And the winner was Dr. Grant
Monroe, of Cornwall General.
The award was presented
to Dr. Monroe by Cornwall's
very own Tina Menzhal.
[crowd exclaiming]
- I hit the wall
underneath the bridge.
But I could see the finish line
from over there,
so the pain just disappeared.
I also knew that Miss Menzhal
was gonna be here.
So, I mean,
I had to come in first.
- Performance artist
Antonia Rubles Hewitt
set the normally staid
city of Cardiff
on its collective ear this week.
The ex-model is proposing
an installation composed or,
shall we say decomposed,
of a rather unique medium.
In the Piero Manzoni genre.
Now, Toni.
This installation bears
a rather provocative name.
Don't you think?
- I think that it's
an honest name.
- And you are calling
this installation?
- Shit.
- Could you tell us why, dear?
- Uh, because
that's what it's made of.
This is a show about my life.
I've had a shitty life.
And I'm telling it like it is.
- Fascinating, Toni dear.
But if I may ask, this is...
Whose?
- Mine. This is my shit
I want you to look at.
- Show business story.
- Definitely.
- Not Shania Twain.
- No. I think Shania just bought
a castle in Switzerland.
- That's right.
[audience laughing]
- So, it's a political, sports,
show business personality?
- Yes.
- From the Valley.
- It's not an easy one.
- I'm lost.
- So am I.
[bells]
- I have to pass.
- Well, since we are
running out of time,
please turn around now, panel.
And meet international
personality, Tina Menzhal!
- Tina! Yes, I remember.
- Yeah.
- Interesting choice.
- Wonderful.
- This was the show
of the season.
I am telling you. The colors,
the lines, the clothes.
Everything was perfect.
We live for shows like this.
We really do. It's unbelievable.
Caribe. Caribe.
You must be so excited.
- Si.
- Of course she's excited.
The world is excited!
A genius of this magnitude
only comes along once.
And I'm telling you,
we have seen it here tonight!
- The department of transport
promised us months ago
to come up with a solution.
But again, we're the last ones
to get plowed!
Look. I'm a doctor. I'm on call.
My wife is 8-months pregnant.
It's not the safest situation.
- Thank you. That was great.
- I'm gonna have to get
going too.
Don't wait up for me.
I'm filling in for Jeff.
See you in the morning.
I love you.
[excerpt from
Verdi's La Traviata]
Evening shadows
make me blue
When each weary
day is through
How I long to
be with you
My happiness
Every day I reminisce
Dreaming of
your tender kiss
Always thinking
how I miss
My happiness
A million years
it seems
Have gone by
since we shared our dreams
But I'll hold you again
There'll be
no blue memories then
Whether skies
are grey or blue
Any place
on earth will do
Just as long
as I'm with you
My happiness