Streaker (2017) Movie Script

That's me, baltasar naf.
Part-time teacher at
baden high school.
Actually I'd like to
teach more classes,
in addition to my class, 3b,
but the principal, mr ziegler,
would rather I do
the school finances.
But you must be wondering:
Is the beard real?
No, but that's another story.
This one began eight weeks ago.
With this guy: Gottfried Keller.
The great Swiss writer
was born in Zurich in 1819.
After a childhood prank,
he was barred from
higher education,
and began training
as a landscape painter.
Destitute, he lived
with his mother
until receiving a
writing scholarship.
His work delights
both young and old.
"What lovely wonder
do my eyes behold?
A wee fountain..."
Stop, stop, stop.
Can't you hear
the tenderness in the language?
"What lovely wonder,"
writes Keller,
and not just "fountain."
"Wee fountain."
Who will read next?
Thanks, annina.
Maybe someone else?
Striver, striver, striver!
Come on.
Elisabeth, wait.
Yes, mr naf?
Look at your clothes.
You can't go to school
like that. - No?
It's too revealing.
Up top and in between.
It doesn't matter, Mr. naf.
What you wear does matter.
And stop saying "mr naf."
What should I say?
Not everybody has to know.
But they do.
No, not the new kids.
A little less skin, please.
Hey, balz. - Hello, Anja.
So, you like my new lamborghini?
I saw you looking at it.
What? It's yours?
Sure. I'm an Albanian.
Is this salon really
that profitable?
More or less,
plus sports betting.
You should try it.
I'll help you.
Sunday is baden vs. Solothurn.
Bet on baden and you'll win.
You're sure?
Of course. I've got a
kind of betting office.
Give me your money.
I've got the best odds.
Betting and sports
aren't my thing.
No biggie.
It's up to you.
I'm doing the
quarterly accounts.
It's you.
Who else would be here so late.
Karl, you promised me,
if I raised funds
for the new sports field,
and there was
anything left over,
that I'd get it for
the Keller museum.
Does that offer still stand?
Of course.
Sure. Anything else?
Hey, thanks!
What's up with you? - Hey!
Thanks to me there'll be
a Keller museum.
Remember how I met your mom?
Yes, at a gottfried
Keller reading.
And I'm named after his mother.
Yes, and before she died...
100 years ago!
Time to find a new woman!
Before she died,
our dream was to open
a gottfried Keller museum.
Now the dream will come true.
Great, dad.
I'm sure she'd be proud of you.
Shall I cook something?
Soccer and literature
have a lot in common.
They're for everyone.
Incorruptible, unbribable...
That's why it's wonderful
that along with the FIFA museum,
we'll get a gottfried
Keller museum.
Thanks to one man,
and that man is mr naf.
That's the "haus zum
goldenen winkel,"
where gottfried Keller was born.
The city will pay
the remaining costs.
Former councilor leuenberger
supported it personally.
Just imagine it!
A little museum
in Keller's honor,
with his furniture,
books, slippers...
Balz, we're talking
about 280,000 Swiss francs?
Is that correct?
Yes, that's exactly the amount
that I've saved.
It wasn't easy,
but I've worked on
it for three years.
We could use it for
teacher parking!
Or for the sports field.
For FIFA-regulation turf.
But as teachers we
can surely agree
that Keller is more
important than turf.
Let's make the
decision as a team.
So, listen up.
Who wants FIFA-regulation turf?
Raise your hand.
And opposed.
Who wants the gottfried
Keller museum?
Sorry, balz.
I think you can accept that.
But you can't do this!
You're reliable as always.
Thank you.
Karl! You promised me!
Let's move on to the next topic:
Dirty coffee mugs
in the classrooms.
But everything's been prepared.
Karl, please reconsider.
You promised me.
This is the last time.
Of course.
Just this once and never again.
Who knows about it?
Just you and I.
Okay, give me the money.
But this is definitely
the last time.
The fans already think
I'm too old to be goalie.
I'm your biggest fan.
You're fantastic.
That's when I knew what to do.
Bet against our home team
and use the winnings
to save my museum.
Hello, Maya. - Hello, balz.
I'm here for the money
for the sports field.
Here is the authorization
from Karl. - Great.
You can finally begin.
How much do you need?
In cash?
Yes, the construction firm
is old-fashioned.
Go, baden.
I want to bet on
the game after all.
Perfect. Come in.
741,000 francs.
741,000 francs?
Yes. You're a real high roller.
Mr naf?
Since when do you watch soccer?
I'm supporting our team.
Go, baden!
Please don't.
There are other people here.
So, cheers.
Go, baden! Go, baden! Go, baden!
Baden: 0, guests: O0.
It's your fault I
lost all that money!
My fault?
I heard you bribe the goalie.
Oh, I see.
When will you fix the next game?
That was the last time.
He's my only contact.
I lost a lot, too. I'm screwed.
My lamborghini is gone,
and this painting...
What do I care about that crap?
It was the money
for the school sports field.
And I agreed with
the city council.
If this gets out, I'll be fired.
The town will tar
and feather me!
I'll probably go to prison.
Yes, probably.
Help me with this painting?
Nobody knew
fritzli's brother
would strike again.
You know him?
Everybody knows him.
He lives in wettingen.
One minute.
I just have to get dressed.
Want a few eggs? - No, thanks.
You could do it again
and interfere with
one of the teams.
I'll go to the bank and bet...
Out of the question. - Why?
Betting on sports
isn't sportsmanlike.
Not sportsmanlike?
But streaking into a game
is sportsmanlike?
Streaking is a sport.
The object is
to stay on the field, naked,
for as long as possible.
I train just as intensely
as a professional athlete.
stadium knowledge, endurance,
undressing technique, tempo,
interaction with the press...
Most people think:
"Look a naked dude!
Ha ha, that's funny!"
They have no idea
what it takes to get there.
No idea.
A man has 741,000 francs debt.
He has a net salary
of 6,200 francs,
and fixed costs at 3,500 francs.
How long will it take
to repay his debt.
22 years, 9 months,
2 weeks and 5 days.
Very good, annina.
I'm looking for the site
manager. - That's me.
Great. I'm looking for you.
We were in contact
about the payment...
The payment
that hasn't been paid yet?
That's right. That payment.
there's a little problem.
So I won't get my money today?
It's not possible, sadly.
Fine. Then pay on Friday.
Otherwise we've
got a real problem.
What's insider information
worth to you?
Well, if it pays off,
I'd give you 50% of the profit.
On Wednesday at stadion breite,
fritzli's little brother
will streak again.
To interfere with a team?
It's not that.
The streaker.
The streaker is the bet.
You don't understand what I do.
My clients like
to bet on sports.
Streaking is a sport.
The streaker runs around
as long as possible
until he's caught.
Your clients could bet on that.
Why bet on a streaker
and not the game?
Because it's something new.
Your idea is mentally retarded.
You don't have to
iron my hotpants.
It's my pleasure.
Teacher gambles
away school money
Lost is your pride.
Gottfried, no!
So, what's next on the program?
I'm considering
betting the 25 babies
I won last time.
Good idea.
I've got all sorts of games.
Chiasso vs. Schaffhausen.
Biel vs. Wohlen? - Boring.
Zurich vs. Vaduz?
Maybe I'll just
buy my wife that necklace
she really wants. - Okay.
I have something very different,
Just for my best clients.
It's a kind of... new sport.
I'm sorry. I've got bad news.
It's about the money.
I have to take this.
My hairdresser.
You're an awesome guy, bro.
Whatever. All my clients
are crazy about
your streaker idea.
Fritzli's brother
streaked like you said.
Go, go, go!
He stayed on the field
for 49 whole seconds!
The guy's a real athlete!
My clients want more.
When's his next game?
Why should I tell you that?
Your cut, that's why.
37,000 francs?
What can I do with that?
Wipe my ass?
It's the first five percent.
The rest is temporarily
Because of the added value tax.
Oh, added value tax. I see.
One, two, three, four.
For me, for having to wait.
That's over ten percent.
From now on it's cash in hand.
Or should I talk to the
Leave me alone!
Don't touch me!
You're mean!
Not in the car!
I don't want to go!
My mother is on
the local council!
Is something wrong?
Your sticker is expired.
Replace it right away, mr naf.
Recognize me?
My daughter is in your class.
I mean strebel, annina. Yes.
I see.
It's nice to see you. You, too.
I'll take care of the sticker.
No! Help!
Get in! - I feel dizzy!
What did he do? He's a streaker.
We're taking him into custody.
You go to jail for that?
Yes, if there's proof
it's premeditated.
I have to go. - Okay.
Two months? - The problem is
they found all my material.
And commissar
strebel is a striver.
You thinking about starting?
Are you nuts?
I'm a respected teacher.
I'd be a laughing stock.
I'd never see my daughter again.
My ex-girlfriend
tried very hard to understand...
but do you know other streakers?
Get lost, you dirty capitalist!
People like you ruin our sport!
I hope you choke
on your money in hell!
Yes? - When is his next streak?
Tell me now,
or we'll lose a fortune.
If it's Wednesday,
will you pay on Friday?
You're an awesome guy!
Sunday, Monday, Tuesday...
Four days.
Oh, excuse me.
Excuse me.
What? - What? Are you serious?
Fuck off, little pervert.
What? Streaking?
What's wrong with you?
newspaper by the unemployed.
newspaper by the unemployed.
Do you own this?
My fatherin-law.
He emigrated.
Come here.
Here, take a seat.
This is stadion
kleinfeld in kriens.
Capacity: 5,100
people. 540 seats.
You will be located here.
It's 46.5 feet
to the edge of the field.
Got it?
Sure, boss. Good. Come with me.
So, this is a model
of the situation.
I built it 1:1 for you.
You start here.
That's not a chair.
This is the barrier.
It's the same height as
in the stadium.
Undress, undress, undress here.
And in you go!
Any questions? - No.
And go!
Pull, and it's off.
Okay, I have just the thing.
Very good.
Hello. New soccer boots?
Let's look at two
different models.
So, pull the pants down
with both hands,
then yank them forward.
It's not easy. I tried.
Have you done this before? - No.
Doesn't it look a bit gay?
No, no.
The thong works the same way.
Yank it forward, but be careful
it doesn't get stuck
on your... ass.
It'd better work.
It'll work.
Go, go, go!
That's your streaker?
He's not on the field!
He isn't naked!
Four, five,
six and 7,000.
Is that it?
Somebody bet correctly.
I had to give him his winnings.
Down to the second?
Yes, he won 30,000.
What if two or three people
bet correctly?
It's improbable, but possible.
That's how it goes.
Some win, many lose.
We need quantity and time.
I don't have time.
Then you need quantity.
It's simple:
More streakers, more money.
The longer they're out there,
the less people
will bet correctly.
"Like the scent of violets.
Like the yearning
of love's lament..."
"It roams..." Thanks. Sit down.
Annina, continue.
"It is the song of..."
"It is the song of
peace among men..."
I thought we had a deal.
Pick him up!
It'll be healed in a few weeks.
In a few weeks. It was worth it.
Man, I overcame an obstacle
and won self-confidence.
It was so awesome!
I'm so awesome!
Excuse me. Is this
"overcome obstacles,
win self-confidence"?
Yes. - Thanks.
My name is strapinski.
Wenzel strapinski.
I'm glad you felt compelled
to answer my ad.
Here you will learn
to overcome obstacles
and win self-confidence.
After intensive
personal training
you will each give
an unforgettable show
in front of a large
live audience.
My method is somewhat
What a bastard!
No, thanks!
It's nice you've stayed.
It was his first streak.
Must've been
the pressure of unemployment.
Something's not right.
Fredy, rewind it a little.
I'm Franz. That's fredy.
Sorry, Franz. Rewind a bit.
Stop. Now play.
Zoom in.
An accomplice?
I'll look into it.
Hi, I'm ren strunz
from bergisch gladbach.
I work at quality-pet.
Monique la fleure,
and open for anything.
Gabriel griinthaler, 36, single.
Should I undress? - Not yet.
I don't mind. - No.
Marwan al'sharaa,
I have 30 years
and no work permit.
No problem.
Welcome to Switzerland.
My therapist said
I should come out
of my shell more.
You will each make
just a few appearances.
What if we get caught?
Good question.
The first three times
they won't do much
if you have an excuse
like a bachelor party,
alcohol, you lost a bet
or trouble at work.
Excuse me. My language not good.
What we doing here?
You'll see in a second.
On your Mark, go.
This is 40 degrees
and this is 75 degrees.
It's time to learn
to let go of inhibitions.
Grass off limits
So, they're coming this way.
And he comes from behind?
Yes, clothes off.
Yes, yes, yes!
Kushtrim, I know when and where
the next streaks will happen.
Awesome! There will be several.
Go, aarau! Go, aarau!
Go, aarau!
Are you sure...
Only 14 seconds.
The next one's better.
24 seconds.
Come on, the next one's in biel.
Sure, you can take your people
and your equipment and leave,
sue me or break all my bones...
But on the other hand
you're a businessman,
and there are 82,000
francs in there,
plus 10% for you.
The choice is yours.
And suddenly
I had a very different job.
How can I say this modestly?
Ajobl hada certain talent for.
So, what's this?
If he comes this way,
you're in trouble.
Streaking! The new sports trend?
This streaking epidemic
is intolerable!
They're making us
look like asses!
Yes, with their asses.
I summoned a special unit
to put an end to these nut jobs.
Ms Sandra strebel
leads the unit.
She's a distinguished commissar.
Go ahead.
Thanks, mr president.
Hello, ladies and...
This is, most likely,
the work of an organized gang.
Several clues point to that,
and I've identified a signature.
The signature of a
kind of mastermind
behind the whole thing.
I must find that mastermind
and bring him to justice.
You're never home anymore.
Did you meet someone? - No.
I have more important
things to do.
Like what?
Well, your father...
I'm teaching a kind of course.
Wow. Super exciting.
He's dangerous.
You've got a radius.
Every stadium
has its plusses and minuses.
Letzigrund stadium
has this athletics track.
That influences your gear
and streak angle.
Standard model Hercules,
Here are two mammoth models.
Stop streaking!
He's our best man.
Got an 1q of 138.
Hits the target at any range.
Black belt in karate.
Dan rank five.
I've got a mission for him.
Of course. What's it about?
Sorry, it's top secret.
That's what I thought.
Stop. This is interesting.
This security guard
approached at 35 degrees,
and this one at 120 degrees.
The best evasive
route isn't this way.
It's where you'd least
expect it to be.
This isn't just any streaker.
Leandro de la Cruz
set the world record
in 1997.
He was on the field
3 minutes and 18 seconds
before they caught him.
Watch, marvel and learn.
Strapinski. - This is Monique.
You said to call
if something's up.
Two of my clients... - Fredy.
Pass the shampoo? - Sure Franz.
They're cops!
You won't believe what I heard.
Three times the budget.
Three times the security.
And a special unit
just to stop us.
What does it all mean?
Thank you for coming by.
We need to talk
about annina's performance.
Of course.
It's just a bit of a shock.
She's never had problems.
She's sad if
there's no homework.
It's not about homework.
It's about her
behavior in class.
She's behaving...
She disrupts class.
That's not true!
And lies.
Honey, go outside for a sec.
It's better if I
talk to mr naf alone.
What's wrong all the sudden?
Do you have stress
at home or at work?
Have you taken on
any new responsibilities?
I'm the head of a special unit
to catch streakers.
But with annina...
A special unit for streakers?
Isn't that going overboard?
Not at all.
We're talking about
an organized gang
lead by a certain strapinski.
Interesting theory.
How do you plan
to stop the streakers?
That must be difficult.
Yes, it is.
But I think I've discovered
a simple pattern.
Just imagine this is the
playing field.
And this is the streaker.
Stop! Stop!
Change of plans.
The police know everything!
Three, two, one,
kick-off in thun.
Keep me informed. St. gallen?
We're in the 34th minute.
All is quiet.
Good. Basel? - Here, too.
88th minute, basel is
in the lead. - Thanks.
Stick to important information.
It looks good. They don't dare.
Basel here. Possible
streaker from section a3.
Let me guess:
Lost bet, bachelor night
or problems at work.
I know all the excuses.
We know you belong
to a streaker gang.
Catch the tiger by the toe.
Eeny, meeny, miny, mo
and you are out!
What's with him?
Blood alcohol: 2.0.
It's his excuse.
But he was sober before.
Sorry, do we know each other?
You're an actor. - No.
But I've been on TV before.
The streaker, right?
You saw that?
Of course! You were incredible!
Awesome. - I'm a huge fan.
Thanks. - Excuse me.
A beer for my buddy.
It's on me. Cheers. - Cheers.
What a coincidence.
I don't believe it.
Tada! Our training center.
I recruited somebody.
You can't just bring him here.
Without a background check.
You can trust Andreas 100%.
We've really old friends.
It's an honor.
We have to be very careful.
No problem, mr strapinski.
I'd like to speak to mr strebel.
Ah, mr n&f. Sure.
We've been expecting you.
Come with me.
Here you go.
Hello, mr naf.
I'm glad you had time.
Thanks for coming
all the way to Zurich.
Especially on the weekend.
Take a seat.
Is this about my daughter again?
Annina... - Stop. Before
you start ranting,
I've been thinking
about a few things.
Last time we talked
about my work.
I wondered why.
Why is a teacher
interested in my work?
After your second
call, it hit me.
I'm sorry.
So you figured it out. - Yes.
Yes... you've got a crush on me.
But that's not forbidden.
Most men are cowards nowadays.
It's great you took this step.
I don't like cowards.
Annina's dad
was my boyfriend for 8 years.
He didn't have the courage
to marry me or to leave me.
He didn't leave
till 1 got pregnant.
I'm sorry. - Don't be.
I just want to say:
Sometimes you have to be brave.
To bravery.
To bravery.
Have you been
up the grobmunster lately?
Not for ages.
Have you been
to the lake lately?
Not for ages.
Have you rented a boat lately?
Annina? - At a friend's house.
I'll do it. It's a sports bra.
Oh, shit! - Oh, no.
Go on, you were undressing.
Mission complete.
Strapinski = baltasar naf
Need more time.
I'll report later.
I've got to go.
You can stay in bed.
Need more time.
I'll report later.
Bad news?
It's just work.
It was really nice.
Mr naf?
I thought you were
at a friend's.
She went to the movies
with someone else.
Well, did you do your homework?
Mr naf? Was it by the book?
You're walking funny.
Sore muscles?
Watch out, mr naf.
The cops are coming.
He knows all about that.
That's enough.
Now an excerpt from
clothes make the man:
"Strapinski smiled
a sickly smile..."
"Strapinski smiled
a sickly smile..."
So, you want to streak with us?
Yes, very much so.
Okay, then undress.
Okay, now do the propeller.
The what?
The propeller. You know.
Okay, now turn your body.
Stay like that.
Don't stop. Faster.
A little more to the left.
Turn it the other way. Faster.
Okay, I see you've
definitely got talent.
I've got a special
mission for you.
An international mission.
The cup semi-final
is about to begin:
Zurich vs. Bern.
It's an exciting match.
Who will make the final?
And will a streaker
make it onto the field
again today?
One team is out to stop them:
The security team
from letzigrund stadium.
We've worked on
anticipating the streakers.
Identifying streakers
immediately is key,
and the legwork.
Strapinski wants me
to streak in Columbia.
What do I do?
Do it! Important!
More security.
Yes. I was expecting them.
Did we get a lot of bets?
Yes, too many.
We could lose a lot of cash.
When will I get 140,000?
140,000? That's tough.
He's got to survive
for 52 seconds.
If he does, I'm out. - Out?
Yes, then I can pay off
the sports field.
Out? Out?
What about the Keller museum?
I met somebody who's
more important to me than he is.
It's getting too
risky for me anyway.
Their defense is like a wall.
Speaking of defense,
there are no streakers in sight.
We're coming to the end
of the first half.
A nice pass to the center.
And still no suspicious
people in sight.
Eleven seconds. Sorry.
You saw it yourself.
Not one but two streakers today,
mr gress.
That surprised me, but it proves
that streaking is
an evolving sport.
It's not like back in your day.
It wasn't modern soccer,
but we were dressed.
This has to stop right now!
They're dicking us around!
Yes, with their dicks.
Ms strebel.
We agree.
We've got a top agent
working undercover in the gang.
A very exceptional agent.
It's only a matter of time.
Where is that game? In Columbia.
It's a categoria primera game.
Their problems are
similar to ours.
Ms strebel, please go on.
We'll get strapinski soon.
Then I'll show him!
Take care.
Okay, bye. - Great.
I'll be right back.
Fuck. - Wow!
It's sucks.
They're betting for security.
Nobody believes
anyone can do it.
That's even better. - No!
How do we pay them if they win?
Some of them
don't have a sense of humor.
We'll cancel it. - No, we won't.
Don't worry so much. It'll work.
I'll send in my best people.
What's the extra cash for?
It's a surprise.
I hate surprises.
It's not for you.
We inscribed it
like you requested.
Would you like to have a box?
No, that's not necessary.
You'll get the last
110,000 on Monday.
Plus your 10 percent.
But if you don't
pay on Monday...
Yes, I know.
Then you'll break all my bones.
The cup final will
also be our final.
Our crucial, final appearance.
There will be victims.
Some of you won't make it.
But we will succeed as a team!
Franz, get our best
surveillance team.
Your mother.
You need to be on the
left at halftime,
near the locker rooms.
In sector a,
you're seat 23,
in the second row.
You wanted to see me? - Yes.
I've got a surprise for you.
Me too.
Look, I made them just for you.
Try one.
You coming?
I want to show you something.
I see. In the bedroom.
Lie down on the bed.
Now close your eyes.
Oh boy! - You're strapinskil
you lied to me,
faked everything!
I wasn't faking. My feelings...
What you say now
can be used against you.
I love you.
"Il love you."
Any other lies?
Yes, I am strapinski.
I couldn't tell you!
We have to do this one!
The site manager
wants his money!
The salon clients
will make trouble!
Let me go.
It's a life and death matter!
"Life and...
Death." I can't do that.
You can watch your
team from here.
The final is about to begin:
Baden vs. Bern.
Annina, thank god.
Do you have a saw for metal?
Yes, we do. - Great! Go get it.
I just forgot this.
At least give me the phone!
No! They're not for youl!
Hello. - Cheers.
But baden has proved
that they can beat
the big boys, too.
Thanks to stiel in the goal.
Stiel has seen better days.
Mr salzgeber,
the man is in peak form.
You have no idea.
Hey, guys. - Hello, annina.
Look, I've got cookies.
May 1? Thanks.
Want one?
Dear spectators.
On behalf of stadium security
and the police,
I'd like to inform
you that, today,
we caught the streaker gang.
Their leader is baltasar naf,
a teacher from baden.
His partner and accomplices
are being arrested
as I speak to you now.
So, it looks like the end.
The streakers will
streak no more.
The game lasts 90 minutes.
The ball is round
and the streaker
comes at the end.
Enjoy the game.
I take full responsibility.
Was it something I said?
Hey, mom.
Want a cookie? They're amazing.
No, thanks.
Is that the best way to do it?
We always do it this way.
So, my situation
is easy to explain.
To save the sports field,
I need to stay
out here
for one minute and 23 seconds.
So wish me luck.
Unbelievable! It looks like
the streaker is baltasar naf,
the streaker gang leader!
69% angle... 110% angle...
He's doing well.
His strategy is excellent!
Naf! Naf!
Naf! Naf!
"Sometimes you
have to be brave."
He's been out there two minutes!
You thinking what I am?
He might do it!
He might just break
the world record
set in 1997 by
Leandro de la Cruz!
Go, dad! You can do it!
Naf is your dad? Yes, of course.
World record: 3:18
The whole stadium is with him,
but security is closing in!
World record: 3:18
Crazy! - A world
record for Switzerland!
It's unbelievable!
Way to go, naf!
New world record!
You're the best, dad!
I cuffed you a bit
better this time.
I'm sorry.
There are worse things.
Like a damage suit
for two million and
six months prison.
Although 30 minutes ago
a man in a white
lamborghini drove up.
He paid the damages for you.
So where
will you serve your sentence?
I found just the place
for you to do that.
There was enough money
for the sports field
and for the Keller museum.
I was allowed
to serve my sentence there.
Come closer so you can all see.
This was Keller's
living room furniture
where he relaxed
after a hard day's work.
These were his slippers.
He wore them
while he revised the 7th version
of the people of seldwyla.
We're closed for today.
We're closed.
Have a safe trip home.
Want me to help tomorrow too?
I'm sorry.
We can't leave you unsupervised.
It's way too dangerous.
Then you'd better sleep over.
The end