Strictly for the Birds (2021) Movie Script
1
When we are
told all of our lives
that there are only two
possibilities, either, or,
it can be hard to
look beyond that.
Some of us think
outside the box.
But for many of us,
the box becomes our world.
There is no outside the box.
If someone had told me
I'd play myself in a
movie about my life,
I'd have laughed.
Thank god I did.
I'd been off into the world.
I have become more
open to myself.
Watch your step.
Feeling change in the wind
Golden fields, tall grass
Find the sun here
Watch out for the wall.
Right here, Miss Birdsall?
Yeah, right there in the middle.
Okay.
Have I transformed?
Not really.
I carry too much
of my past with me.
Am I free to be who I am?
Yes.
And with that,
perhaps transformation isn't
the central issue after all.
Reimagine living this time
Looking back on
where we've been
We'll leave them all behind
No one has a name
for what we'll find
You know, this
is a transition thing
for both of us, actually.
Are you liking it there?
Yes, it's beautiful here.
It's really beautiful.
I think this is a good move.
If you need anything,
let me know.
Well, I really don't even
think about that, you know.
Between my age
and my background.
I'll be living alone
the rest of my life,
and that's okay, you know.
That's, this is nice.
I can learn to be me.
Excuse me.
Hi there.
- Oh hi.
- My name is Zoey,
and I live right down here.
I wonder if I could
ask you for a favor.
Uh, okay.
What kind of favor?
Well, I have this problem.
I can't reach the top shelf
of my kitchen cabinets.
And for some reason,
best known to himself,
when my son comes over,
he puts everything up there,
and he doesn't seem to realize
that they're empty for a reason.
He's got a tall wife,
and he seems to forget
that he has a short mom.
So I was wondering if you
could reach some stuff for me.
Please.
Okay, I'm Kate, by the way.
It's nice to meet you.
And this is my partner Max.
- My best friend.
- Hi Max.
Okay let's go down here.
Okay.
I gotta tell you,
I really admire
that you're tall.
As a matter of fact,
I envy your height.
It's very challenging
to be this short.
Oh, I would think so.
Absolutely.
But I don't think I'm
gonna grow at this point.
- I think.
- Oh probably not.
This is a great place to live.
I think you're
gonna like it here.
Everybody cares
about everyone else.
It's like we're living
among old people,
but we don't realize we're old.
Who are all these old people?
It's right over there.
This cabinet on the top shelf.
So didn't I see you at
First Unitarian last week?
No, I just moved in.
Oh, where'd you come from?
Laramie, Wyoming.
Wow, Wyoming.
Does everyone dress
like that in Wyoming?
No, most people wear jeans.
Well, that's pretty
unique, I'll say that.
- Okay.
- Thanks a lot, you know?
I keep meaning to get a stool,
and I keep forgetting.
But now with neighbors like you,
who needs a stool, right?
Right, well, I'm glad to help.
Well how about sticking around
and having a cup of tea?
- I have, I have...
- Oh come on, come on come on.
Just say yes.
It's just a cup of
tea, no commitment.
Okay, yeah, sure.
Okay, let me get some.
How about some cheese
and crackers with that?
Oh, alright.
Mm, now that I think of it,
how about some wine instead?
Sure, why not?
You know, one of the good
things about getting old
is that we can drink
whenever we want.
We don't have to ask
anyone's permissions.
Oh that's plenty.
Thank you.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
So did you come
here alone, Kate?
I did.
My partner died four years ago.
I'm really sorry to hear that.
Well yeah, thanks.
But you know,
just in case you
might be interested,
I know a lot of single people.
Oh, I don't need that.
Thank you very much.
Well, amen to that.
Have some more wine, Kate.
It's good for you.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Riding 'round roads I know
Feeling change in the wind
Golden fields, tall grass
I had become friends
with Albert in fourth grade.
He was my age,
and lived in a brown brick house
on the other end
of the next block.
This was the 1950s,
a time when people didn't
talk about their bodies.
And my family certainly didn't.
Imagine me, imagine you
Hey Danny, here it is.
Said you liked 'em.
That's real neat.
My uncle has one.
Without your love
Hey.
What are you doing?
Why did you take that?
Think it's pretty?
Mm-hmm.
What do you like about it?
I like the color, patterns.
It's beautiful.
That's why I like
playing down here so much.
There's more.
It's okay.
What's the name?
Thank you for inviting
me to this, Zoey.
Any time, Kate.
As I went down to
the river to pray
Studying about
that good old way
And who shall wear
the starry crown
Good lord, show me the way
O sisters, let's go down
Let's go down, come on down
O sisters, let's go down
Down to the river to pray
As I went down to
the river to pray
Studying about
that good old way
Thanks for coming.
- That was so nice.
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
- That music
was just wonderful.
I saw Sue this morning.
They're back from their trip.
Oh, where'd they go this time?
I forget.
Montana, doesn't matter.
I have to tell you something.
Well, before they
went on their trip,
John and I got together,
and we went hiking.
It was wonderful.
We had this fabulous trip,
and we stopped at
this perfect spot.
And well, it proceeded
and let me tell you,
John has a lot of stamina.
There we were, you know.
Really going at it.
Good grief, woman.
Don't you know
you're not supposed
to put your paws on some
other woman's husband?
No, he's not married.
Well, then have at it.
You will, anyway.
Oh, Andrea.
Hi.
- That was gorgeous.
- Oh thank you.
- Just gorgeous.
- Thank you,
thanks very much.
We have some new people.
Yeah, I thought I saw
some new faces over here.
Do you know Zoey?
No, no, hi Zoey.
Hi, nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.
And this is Kate.
Hi Kate.
Hi Andrea.
Nice to meet you.
Oh, my pleasure.
- Please stay, have a seat.
- Come on, have a seat.
- Join us.
- Oh we want to see you.
- Alright.
- Have a seat, have a seat.
Meet Kate.
Your public wants you.
Really nice evening, huh?
Yeah, yeah,
it's been a really
great evening.
So, I haven't seen you
at one of our concerts before.
Oh yeah, I just
moved to Portland.
You were great, by the way.
Oh, thanks.
Maybe you'd like to
join us sometime.
Oh no, I ruined
my voice years ago.
You don't want to hear me sing.
Oh well, if you
ever change your mind,
come on over.
Okay.
So, I noticed you.
I've been admiring your
earrings and your necklace.
It's very pretty.
Thank you.
I was afraid maybe I'd dressed
too loud for the occasion.
No, no.
Anything goes around here.
So, no problem.
Have you lived in Portland long?
Yeah, I have.
How many years has it been now?
42 years.
Oh wow.
Yeah.
Almost a native.
So what are those
guys talking about?
I really don't know them.
You don't know them?
- My favorite subject.
- Yeah.
They seem to
be enjoying themselves.
They do seem to be
enjoying themselves.
I am too.
Oh yeah, me too.
Feeling a little shy, though.
Oh, yeah, me too.
Is Lilly always that way?
- Yeah.
- Oh.
When we met the other day,
I thought to myself, what
an interesting person.
I'd really like to
get to know her.
Oh.
Well, I don't know
how interesting I am.
So, Lilly told me
you'd been in the Coast Guard.
I was.
- 21 years.
- Wow.
I was in the Army, too.
But I liked the
Coast Guard, better.
Must have been
interesting to be out there
on a ship with all those guys.
Ha, well.
Most of my stations
were on shore.
So what brought you to Portland?
Well, I wanted to be
closer to my daughter.
She's up in Olympia.
I wanted to be able to see her
more than once a year.
I think I also wanted
to be in a bigger place.
So you're starting over.
Yep, 68 years old.
It took me a long
time to get here.
Oh gosh, after my divorce,
I moved to Portland.
And I worked as a librarian,
for 15, maybe 20 years.
And then I started
my own business.
And here I am.
Well, it seems funny that we can
sum up our lives in
just a few sentences.
Yeah.
We all know that there's
more to it than that,
- but, yeah.
- Yeah.
We've lived long lives, Kate.
Yep.
This is a nice
place you got here.
Well thanks.
Do you have it all to yourself?
Yeah, I do.
I don't have any roommates,
and I don't have a boyfriend.
Just some good girlfriends
and my business.
Yeah, sometimes relationships
can get so complicated.
You want to live life.
I want to live life.
Well, I hope you do.
You're so cute.
You're pretty cute yourself.
Oh thanks.
Hello?
Oh hi, Kate, this is Andrea.
Oh, Andrea.
Good morning.
Hi.
I hope I didn't wake you up.
Oh, no. I'm up.
I was thinking about
going shopping today
for some clothes,
and I wondered if you'd
like to go with me.
Oh, yeah, sure.
Okay.
I could get some things too.
Well don't sound too excited.
Oh no, I'd like to go with you.
It sounds like fun.
Well you get your breakfast,
and I'll pick you up
a little after noon.
Okay, okay, bye.
Bye.
How do you think that works?
It's nice, I like it.
Alright.
I liked it, too.
Well here's one I think
really delivers your message.
Wow, classy and feminine.
Well, I always thought
clothes made the woman.
Puberty can be tough.
Getting the wrong puberty
can be even worse.
And if you don't have people
around you who understand,
it can be devastating.
I made dinner.
Looks nice.
How is it?
Really good.
It's perfect.
No, let me.
Thank you.
Are you okay?
I'm fine.
No.
Something's wrong.
Not really.
Sorry.
Give me some more.
Al?
Al.
Your father's on his way home.
So you two should
get cleaned up.
Why didn't you tell me?
You're moving?
My dad told me you're moving.
Why didn't you tell me?
I didn't know, either.
Not until my mother
told me like a week ago.
But, my dad got
a job in Indiana.
So we have to go, too.
I'm sorry.
I'm never gonna have a
friend like you again, am I?
Listen.
They're gonna tear
the house down.
So...
Let's go downstairs
one more time.
Okay.
Albert was leaving.
His house was getting
torn down for the freeway.
Our secret haven was
being taken away.
It's just so unfair.
I think myself a lucky man
I never saw Albert again.
And it would be
more than 50 years
before I told anyone
about playing in his basement.
Over the winter of 1983,
I was an engineer
in the Coast Guard.
I was divorced,
and my daughter Casey was nine,
living with her mother.
I was alone and lonely,
and I had begun to dress
in women's clothes in private
to comfort myself.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Andrea
Happy birthday to you
And many more
Make a wish!
Oh yes!
Happy birthday!
Father and child
Holy infant so
tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly
When I met Linda,
I saw that she liked her wine,
but didn't think much about it.
Her father and older
brother were alcoholics.
And Linda was okay
with my cross-dressing.
At least at first.
How are the potatoes?
- They're good.
- Yeah?
Just right.
I made 'em the way you like 'em.
She was jealous
of the other woman.
Even though that was me.
Oh, you're probably
really tired, huh?
I don't really get that.
When people are tired
after traveling.
All I did was sit on a train.
Well, you must be looking
forward to Christmas.
Excited about it?
Not really.
I can't fit my presents
in my suitcase.
So I can't take them home.
Well, maybe that's okay.
Maybe they'll just
be here for you
when you come to visit.
What do you mean?
Well, we were thinking that
if you had your own room
and some of your own things,
that maybe you'd feel more
comfortable to come visit,
maybe a little more often.
Oh.
You know, your father
wanted to get you something
really special,
and we thought you'd like it.
You know, when I was little,
I was lucky to get a good job
from my parents once a year,
much less a new bicycle.
You should be grateful.
Casey.
Oh, just let her cool down, Dan.
She's just tired.
What are you doing?
You said yourself that
divorce is hard on children.
But she doesn't need
to punish you for it.
You just, you let
me handle this, okay?
Merry merry merry Christmas
Casey, this is
hard on both of us.
Can we just try to
not make it worse?
I came here to see you,
not your wino girlfriend!
Fly like an eagle.
Just like an eagle.
What are you watching?
Oh it's just this old cop show.
I like these.
Justice,
loyal, and German soldiers.
Any prisoner here is-
- You want to watch
something else?
No, this is fine.
Why'd you leave?
Well,
sweetie.
Your mother and I,
we decided that we would,
well, it'd be better for you,
and it'd be better for her,
if you stayed.
Well you know, your
school, your friends.
But why did you leave me?
Sweetie,
I wish it had been different.
I don't know, hon.
It's just, I'm sorry.
I am Major Hoffman.
Of the funeral staff.
Oh you are?
And why didn't you bring
your funeral with you?
Were my relationships difficult
because I didn't know who I was?
Couldn't be who I was.
Or did I just not know
how to love another?
When I didn't know
how to love myself.
It was fun spending
time with your friends.
Thanks for including me.
Oh, you're welcome.
I'm glad you could come over.
They're fun.
Yeah, they are.
So this is on me.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
You don't have to do that.
I want to.
Okay, well I'll
get the next time.
Okay.
So what sounds good to you?
If I get the dead guy
wings, will you share with me?
No.
No, that's entirely too messy.
Oh, yeah.
You could get 'em.
Yeah, but you're probably right.
Maybe I'll get the,
well, I don't know.
Casey's coming soon.
I'd love for you to meet her.
I would very much
like to meet her, too.
She sounds like
a wonderful girl.
Oh, I think so.
I'm very lucky.
Are you still in
touch with Casey's...
I...
Not very often.
They were with me
through the tough times.
We're friends.
That's nice.
So, since we're telling
each other stories
about our past relationships,
I'll tell you about
my first marriage.
It was really quite awful.
A couple years into it,
I met another teacher,
and we had an affair.
Turned out to be seven
of the nine years
that I was married.
When I was 29,
I realized that I couldn't
stay married to two guys
for the rest of my life.
And so, I divorced 'em
both and moved to Oregon.
Oh, good for you.
Well, that was a long time ago.
Yeah, it was.
You know, I think we make
the best decisions that
we can at the time.
Yeah.
And they end up
being our stories.
And without them,
we wouldn't be where we are now.
That's true.
I like where we are today.
Yeah, I do too.
I'll just get my keys.
After we'd lived in Laramie
for a couple of years,
Linda got sick.
Now, I'll be right back.
The diagnosis
was that it was terminal.
Unless she could stop drinking.
After several
tries, she gave up,
resigned to her fate.
Oh...
Where is it, where is it,
where is it, where
is it, where is it?
God damn it!
No no, no no, no no
no no no no no, no no.
Where is the opener?
I threw it away.
Well then I'll just
push the cork down.
I've done it plenty!
That's pathetic!
You're pathetic!
What would Casey think
if she knew about you?
If she knew you liked
to wear women's clothes!
- You're killing yourself!
- I bet she'd love
to know that!
Linda, you are killing yourself.
You are.
As she became sicker,
I had to spend more and more
time taking care of her.
She resented that.
Is it too hot?
Well it's, a little bit.
- It'll be okay.
- Okay.
Thank you.
After Linda died in '07,
I worked to put my
life back together.
She and I had been
good together,
but her decline had stretched
me all too close to breaking.
I blamed her and her drinking
for the misery of
the last few years.
And I blamed myself for my
inadequacies in helping her.
Your succulents are fake.
I'm sorry for your loss.
I don't know what to
say at these things.
It's okay, Bruce.
She was too young.
But, you're gonna feel better.
You're gonna be okay.
Thank you, it's nice
of you to say that.
I needed to hear it.
Oh, and thank you for
all of your help today.
And if you need
anything else, you know,
I'll do whatever.
Right, thank you.
Thanks for coming.
Of course.
Okay.
Let us know if you
need anything, okay?
I will, thank you for coming.
No problem.
See you in church, okay?
Okay, alright.
Doing okay?
Yeah.
Did you at least
get something to eat?
I'm just glad it's over.
Well, it was a
beautiful service.
You did a great job.
Thank you.
I'm glad you could
come up for this.
Me too.
I wanted to be here.
Is that your old bike?
Yeah.
Yeah.
The...
Brings back
memories, doesn't it?
Linda and I rode everywhere.
That's how we found Laramie.
We went out to the
Rocky Mountains,
and just started
thinking of moving West.
Dad.
I'm sorry that Linda and
I were never that close.
Look, I know that was
a difficult relationship
for you both.
I wanted to like her.
I did, I just...
It was a tough time.
There is this.
Well, I hate to even say this,
but there's a small part of me
that's relived that...
I feel guilty for
even thinking that.
I mean, that's...
That's bad, isn't it?
No.
You loved her so much.
You took care of
her for so long.
Now it's time to live your life.
Can I tell you something?
I need to tell you something.
Yeah, of course.
I wish I had mentioned
it a long time ago.
Okay.
I find comfort in
wearing women's clothes.
Some of this still
doesn't make sense to me,
but I've grown to accept it.
Some things just
don't make sense.
Here.
What do you think?
Well,
it's age appropriate.
I suppose it is.
I'm sorry.
No, it's okay.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Are you okay?
I'm okay, I'm okay.
- Okay.
- Are you okay?
Yeah, I will be.
- Okay.
- Alright.
Come on, let's forget this.
Okay, show me that bike.
Hey Kate.
Are you okay?
Oh yeah.
I'm fine.
I just, I'm a little in
my head this afternoon.
Would you like me to let
you go home to take a nap?
Oh, no.
No, no, I'm having
a wonderful time.
So am I.
So am I.
This is really, really pretty.
It is a pretty place.
Beautiful picture.
Looks like Wyoming.
It is.
I love that painting.
Great, appreciate it.
It's nice to be here.
Well, I'm glad you're here.
This must be Casey.
Yeah, that's her.
Yeah...
I loved her the
moment she appeared.
And I wasn't always there
when she was crying out.
I had a little growing
up to do myself.
Want to see my flutes?
Yeah.
That's beautiful.
So that's what I was saying.
What makes it unusual
is that it's white oak,
almost all the floors
you see are red oak,
and those are white, white oak.
God, did I tell you about
trying to permit my greenhouse?
And you know what,
that's invasive.
You should tear that out.
I don't know plants.
Well, it shouldn't be there.
It looks nice what
you did with it,
but it should go.
So between the setbacks
from the property line,
and the minimum distance
between buildings,
I don't have a greenhouse
big enough to do anything,
and let alone, do
all my research.
But you know,
well what the heck?
Who are they to say?
And the thing is,
you don't even need a permit
for an agricultural
building out in the county.
But in the city, you can't
get an agricultural permit.
- Hey Bruce, Bruce.
- What?
Bruce, can I,
look, can I talk to
you for a second?
Yeah.
I'd like to tell you
something about myself.
Okay.
I'm transgender.
What does that mean?
Well,
when I was little,
I wanted to be a girl.
But I didn't know how it worked.
I just thought my body
would heal itself.
Shut up.
I've dressed in women's
clothes most of my life.
I don't know how far
I'll pursue this,
but it's time for me to
be more open about it.
How much time do you
think you have left?
Maybe 30 years?
- Well...
- 20?
Yeah, yeah I hope so.
That's a long time
to not be happy.
- Yeah.
- Right?
I suppose it is.
You're gonna stay though, right?
You're not gonna
move off somewhere.
Yeah, I need my home, and
my friends, my community.
Okay, okay.
Those will be imperative for me
to feel like I can move forward.
'Cause I got your back here.
If you go off to...
- Right.
- San Francisco.
I don't know.
Thanks Bruce.
You know, when
you pull that out,
you gotta get the roots, too.
You gotta take it
all the way down,
and you gotta watch it,
and if it comes back,
you gotta pull every bit of it.
Maybe you ought to burn it.
- Okay.
- I'll do it.
- Okay.
- I'll do it tonight.
Do it, I'll go make
more cookies right now.
Alright.
It seems like everyone
has always wanted me
to be something else.
Even I have wanted it.
But Andrea seems to
want me to just be me.
There's a bench over here.
Do you mind if we sit down?
No, that'd be fine.
Beautiful here.
Oh, it sure is, Kate.
So, Kate.
I have the sense you were
born into a male body.
Well, you're right.
I thought of it as
being out of register.
You know, like when the colors
of an image don't line up.
Somehow, wearing women's clothes
gave me a break from
pretending to be a man.
The pressure kept building
to do something.
When I was finally
able to transition,
it was just,
amazing.
It was so wonderful.
I'm so proud of you.
Bless you.
You're just wonderful.
Am I?
Kate, you're such an
interesting and complex person.
Am I?
Yeah, you are.
It's funny, I was always
so forgettable as this guy,
but people seem to
remember me now.
You're wonderful.
Well, I don't know about that.
Well, I think you're wonderful.
Thank you.
There's something I've
wanted to tell you today.
You remember a couple weeks ago,
we got to sit next to
each other in church
for the first time.
Sing in my heart
Well, we were
singing "Spirit of Life,"
and at some point,
your voice dropped into its
natural baritone register.
Lies in the sea
Move in the hand
Giving life the
shape of justice
Truth hold me close
Grace, set me free
I literally
felt my heart crack open.
It was a physical sensation.
And I looked at you
and I said to myself,
"You have just fallen in
love with this woman."
Really?
Yeah, really.
But you've always been with men.
I know.
I know. I've been
married to two men.
But now I find that
I have fallen in love
with a transgender woman.
I think I've scared you.
Well, well, I, I,
I didn't expect this, Andrea.
Well, Kate, I didn't
expect it either,
but here we are.
Let's just see where this goes.
Oh, okay, okay.
You don't need to say anything.
Take care.
I love you.
Ah.
See if my knees will work.
It's easy to love Andrea.
She's just so smart
and kind and confident.
It's harder to accept
that she loves me.
But I need to be free.
Do I dare to try
to love someone,
to make space for
her to love me?
Oh gosh, what's, what's up?
Uh oh.
Hello?
Oh hi Zoey, it's Andrea.
Andrea, hi, what's up?
Well, it's about Kate.
Kate?
What happened to
Kate, what's wrong?
She's fine, she's fine.
It's just that I told her
tonight that I love her.
So wow, do you love her?
Yeah, I do.
Well, that's cool.
So what's the problem?
Well, I'm not supposed to
fall in love with a woman.
Oh baloney, come on.
Man, woman.
You know, it doesn't
really matter.
The big gift is love.
You find love, you
gotta go for it.
Oh my gosh.
But what if I scared her?
Really?
Kate's been in the Army,
she's been in the Coast Guard.
I doubt that she
scares so easily.
Well, she sure didn't
say anything back.
I think she just didn't
know what to say.
She didn't know what
to do with that.
Well, you know
she's more reserved.
But I think she's
got the hots for you.
Do you think so?
It's obvious.
You'd have to be blind
not to notice it.
Wow.
Well, it's
sure taken my by surprise.
Well, we gave you some space.
The rest is up to you.
I should let you go to sleep.
I think, I think I'll be fine,
and I think that I'll
get a good night's sleep,
and I think,
I think I love her.
No worries.
I got a really good
feeling about this,
so just want you to know that.
Goodnight, dear.
Now what, Max? These people...
Hello?
Hey Zoey, it's Kate.
Ah Kate, what's up?
I didn't wake you up, did I?
Wake me?
Nah, I was just reading,
like I always do in the
middle of the night.
Oh, oh good.
Well, it's Andrea.
What about Andrea?
Is something wrong?
Oh, everything's fantastic.
She told me she
loved me tonight.
Oh wow.
That's cool.
So what'd you do?
Well I didn't know what to say.
I was just, I was floored.
I mean, it was,
I didn't know that
was a possibility.
Well, you know,
I hope I didn't
screw anything up.
Oh, I'm sure you
didn't screw up.
Andrea's a smart cookie.
She'll get it.
Yeah, well I,
I'm a woman now.
I thought I'd fall
in love with a man,
but here's Andrea.
She's wonderful.
You know, as you always tell me,
what's so great about men?
Yeah.
But, just so you know,
I have a really good
feeling about this.
I want you to know that.
Oh, oh thank you. I hope so.
So can I go back to sleep now?
Oh, okay Zoey.
Thanks.
Relax.
Bye.
Geeze, Max.
Really, these
people, they're nuts.
Not like my dog.
You're a wise boy.
These are for you, mom.
I know you don't
like flowers, dad.
I didn't bring you any.
The trees have grown a lot
since I was here last.
I didn't really want to come by.
Not because, well...
If you could see me,
you would see things are
a little different.
When I was young,
you told me I was a boy.
Though I didn't doubt
that I was male,
I could see that, but...
Somehow I knew that
I should be a girl.
That I would be
happier as a girl.
That I would fit into the
world better as a girl.
I didn't know how bodies
worked, of course.
I remember when I was little,
being always so hopeful each
night when I went to bed.
Before falling
asleep, I would just,
I would think, well,
perhaps tonight is the night
when this extra
stuff just falls off.
Like how a scab falls off when
the skin underneath heals.
Well then everyone would
see that I'm a girl.
But I want to tell
you both now that,
I've finally figured it out.
I'm just sorry that
I wasn't able to
get it all together
soon enough to show you.
'Cause I think your
reaction would be,
"Well, now it all makes sense."
I just want you to know that
your troubled and
troublesome third child,
who could never really
quite find himself,
well,
she has turned out alright.
So I was finally done.
I didn't know if this
day would ever come.
I was ready to move
on to my life as Kate.
Sometimes it's easier if I act
as if you'd never been.
But I wouldn't have gotten
here without you, Danny.
I love you.
Are you feeling okay?
Yeah.
I feel pretty good, actually.
- Yeah?
- All things considered.
I even took a few
steps around the room,
and that's...
That's good.
Well, Dr. Bauer said
that she did a great job,
and that the surgery
was a success.
Yeah.
- Yeah, she told me that too.
- That's good.
Casey, I know this
is hard on you.
But I'll always be your father.
You know,
a few months ago,
I went to visit my
friends down in the South,
and it was just so wonderful
to walk down the
street as a woman.
No hiding, no shame.
Sometimes a man would open,
hold the door open for me.
And it felt real nice
to be treated as a lady.
People have been so kind to me.
And I know, I know that not
everyone's journey is like mine.
But it just seems like
this secret that
I held so tightly,
hid so well for 65 years,
was far more interesting to me
than to anyone else.
It's been two years
since I got to be Kate.
It's been wonderful,
beyond my wildest dreams.
Andrea sure is a gift.
Maybe certain people
come into our lives
to help us be who we are,
and to help us get
to be who we can be.
You're beautiful, Kate.
I'm glad you think so.
I wish you could see
yourself as beautiful.
I'll try.
You say it.
I'm beautiful?
Say it like you mean it.
I'm beautiful.
You are beautiful.
I don't think you would've
gone through all of this
if you didn't think
you were beautiful.
Well,
it became more a
matter of survival.
I didn't know how much
longer I'd make it as,
what's his name.
I like you just
as you are, Kate.
Well, I sure didn't expect this.
Oh, I didn't
expect this, either.
You want to take
your jacket off?
I haven't done this in a while.
I haven't either.
You might have questions.
Whatever is just fine.
Stuck.
You have a tattoo.
Come with me.
I'm not that heavy.
Here I come.
Hi Kate.
Hi Andrea.
I have a Yoga class
first thing Monday morning,
so I just took off.
Oh, I had wondered
where you'd gone.
Yeah, I'm sorry to worry you.
Oh, that's okay.
Would you like to come in?
Oh, no thanks.
I can only stay
for just a second.
Everything okay?
Well...
Yeah, I guess so.
But, would you be okay
if we took a break here
for a little bit?
What kind of break?
Well, I don't know.
One of my brothers is in
town for a little while,
so I'd like to at least
wait until he's gone, and,
see how I'm feeling.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
I'm sorry.
I'll be in touch, okay?
Actually, that's not it at all.
I'm struggling here, Kate.
I'm not supposed to have
fallen in love with a woman.
But I have.
And I'm not sure
what to do about it.
I need some time to
sit with that, and,
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
Thank you.
I will be in touch.
I'll call you.
- Okay.
- Okay, bye.
Hello, this is Andrea.
Please leave a message,
- and I will call you back.
- Andrea opened
the door to love.
Loving me has to be way
outside her comfort zone.
But whatever happens,
it was really wonderful
to have that little glimpse
of the sweet, powerful
love that she offered.
Oh Katie, where
did you come from?
Where did you come from?
You sure you live here?
This is it.
Wow.
I love it.
Yeah, it's the first
time I used a designer.
Alright.
Can I?
Sure, go ahead.
So do you want to go
somewhere tomorrow,
or do you just want to hang out?
I'm okay with whatever.
How are you and Thomas doing?
He's gone back to school.
Oh, that's good.
That's good.
Mama Kate, you're acting
more like my father today.
It's weird, but I'm kinda
happy to have him back.
You said a few months ago
that I'm pretty much the same.
Well, Papa had this...
I don't know, I guess
you'd call it, like,
an underlying sadness.
And when you got
to me, Mama Kate,
I didn't see that anymore,
but today, I see it again.
Well,
these last few weeks,
I've just been bolling
over with happiness.
I didn't know one person
could even be that happy.
I met a friend,
and she's become
more than a friend.
And I,
I'm waiting for her
to come to her senses,
and leave me.
Why would you say that?
Well, I bring a lot
of baggage with me,
and maybe I'm too old
to start all this again.
I can be happy living alone.
Mama Kate, I'm on my
second marriage, right?
And I'm going to make this work.
I am going to give
everything I have
to make this one work.
And if it doesn't,
'cause they don't always,
at least I will
know that I tried,
and it sounds so dumb,
but I know that I
would love again.
We can't help it, you know?
It's like, how we're built.
I'm glad for you, Casey.
You've been through a lot.
You know how your
neighbor has a love bird?
I thought it was a parrot.
Mama, that's what
love birds are.
Oh.
Anyways, they only
have one of them,
and they're not
supposed to be alone.
They don't do well.
They get erratic in captivity.
Some people are just
meant to pair up.
If you really like this person,
as much as it seems you do,
then I think that you should try
and give everything you
can to be with them.
It's funny, Mama Kate.
I feel like I can talk to you
more than I ever
could with Papa.
Yeah.
It's nice.
Yeah.
Oh Casey and
her talk of love birds.
Actually, all birds
shed their feathers
and replace them with new ones.
Maybe that's what
I've needed to do
so that I could find love.
And let myself be loved.
So Tom.
Yeah?
And Tom Flynn, down.
I've met someone.
And I believe I've
fallen in love.
He was 10 for 14.
Under 10 yards.
That's the patience
part we talked about.
Did you hear me?
Yeah, I heard you.
You fell in love.
Yeah, I've fallen in love.
Her name is Kate.
Really?
Yep.
You know, it seemed like
you might be happier
with a woman.
Well Tom, it sure
feels that way.
I don't think I've
ever been in love.
Someone knocked it away.
John Elway, he did
a quarrel on that.
There's a little
more to the story.
He's gonna spin right around.
She was born transgender.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Okay I'm gonna sit down.
I better sit down
for this, I can see.
Oh Tom.
She's just wonderful.
One handed catch by Van Johnson.
You know,
the message I got from
Dad, I'm sure it was Dad,
was that I was supposed to
fall in love with a man,
be married to a man,
and be taken care of by a man.
Johnson makes the tackle,
or the catch when he's down.
So to fall in love with a woman
has presented a challenge to me.
You know, do I
listen to my heart,
do I listen to the
message in my head?
That's
why Dan Reeves was so upset.
And it's been a struggle,
but it just comes
down to my heart.
I, I love her.
And she loves me.
What can be wrong with that?
Would you get that?
Sure?
Oh, hi.
You must be Casey.
Are you Andrea?
I am.
Come in, please.
Mama Kate's just putting
some things away in the back.
Let me get her for you.
Hey Mama Kate, Andrea's here.
She'll be really
happy to see you.
I'll be happy to see her, too.
It's very nice to meet you.
You too.
Hi Andrea.
Hi Kate.
How are you?
I'm okay.
How are you?
I think I'm gonna go
lay down for a little bit.
It was really nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you too, Casey.
Love you.
Good luck.
Can we sit down?
Sure.
Kate, the words to love songs
have never made any sense to me.
It was just like a language
I didn't understand.
Until I met you.
And now I get it.
I love you, Kate.
Well, I feel like my
life has just started,
and I'm already pushing 70.
Sometimes, I wonder if I'll
even make it another 10 years.
I want to make most of
these years that I do have.
Once I got to be Kate,
I was living just
the perfect life.
I didn't think it was
possible to be happier.
But with you, I am.
I love you, Andrea.
I love you, Kate.
I feel like such
a mess sometimes.
Oh, we all do.
And I worry that I might
lose my mind someday.
If that happened, would
you take care of me?
I'd take care of you.
We could take care
of each other.
Do you wish I
hadn't transitioned?
That I was still
pretending to be a man?
Oh Kate.
I wouldn't have given
you a second look,
'cause you're too short.
Well.
Hey, do you like road trips?
I think a road trip with
you would be fantastic.
Do you know that Johnny Cash
song, "I've Been Everywhere."
I've been everywhere, man
Yeah, I like Johnny Cash.
Yeah, how'd you like to go
to all those places in the song?
All those places?
How many are there?
There are 92 of 'em.
- They're all over the place.
- Oh my gosh.
Well, what's the closest one?
I think Crater Lake.
Well, that's just down the road.
Do you want to go?
I do.
How about next week?
Let's go, Katie bird.
I love you, Andrea.
I love you, Kate.
Something inside of
me that had to be said
Like a sunburn burning
in the back of my head
Like a needle pulling an
unseen thread all my life
I can see it coming
But I just couldn't say
What tomorrow brought
'Cause I was stuck in today
Was a light so bright
It would shine my way to you
It was always there,
it was written that way
It was always there,
it was written that way
It was always there
Just something
that I had to do
It was always there
It was written that way
It was always there
It was written that way
It was always there
Just something
that I had to do
I was toting my pack along
a dusty Winnemucca road
When along came a semi with a
high and canvas covered load
If you're going
to Winnemucca, Mac
With me you can ride
And so I climbed
into the cab
And then I settled
down inside
He asked me if
I'd seen a road
With so much dust and sand
And I said, listen
I've traveled every
road in this here land
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I've breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I've been to Reno,
Chicago, Fargo, Minnesota
Buffalo, Toronto,
Winslow, Sarasota
Wichita, Tulsa,
Ottowa, Oklahoma
Napa, Panama,
Mattawa, La Paloma
Bangor, Baltimore,
Salvador, Amarillo
Tocopilla, Barranquilla,
and Padilla
I'm a killer
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I've been to Boston,
Charleston, Dayton, Louisiana
Washington, Houston,
Kingston, Texarkana
Monterey, Faraday,
Santa Fe, Tallapoosa
Glen Rock, Black Rock,
Little Rock, Oskaloosa
Tennessee to Hennessey
and Chicopee, Spirit Lake
Grand Lake, Devil's Lake,
Crater Lake, for Pete's sake
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I been to Louisville,
Nashville, Knoxville, Ombabika
Shefferville, Jacksonville,
Waterville, Costa Rica
Pittsfield, Springfield,
Bakersfield, Shreveport
Hackensack, Cadillac,
Fond Du Lac, Davenport
Idaho, Jellicoe, Argentina
Diamontina, Pasadena
Catalina, see
what I mean, man
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I've been to
Pittsburgh, Parkersburg
Gravellburg, Colorado
Ellensburg, Rexburg,
Vicksburg, Eldorado
Larrimore, Atmore,
Haverstraw, Chattanika
Chaska, Nebraska,
Alaska, Opelika
Baraboo, Waterloo,
Kalamazoo, Kansas City
Sioux City, Cedar City,
Dodge City, what a pity
I've been everywhere, man
When we are
told all of our lives
that there are only two
possibilities, either, or,
it can be hard to
look beyond that.
Some of us think
outside the box.
But for many of us,
the box becomes our world.
There is no outside the box.
If someone had told me
I'd play myself in a
movie about my life,
I'd have laughed.
Thank god I did.
I'd been off into the world.
I have become more
open to myself.
Watch your step.
Feeling change in the wind
Golden fields, tall grass
Find the sun here
Watch out for the wall.
Right here, Miss Birdsall?
Yeah, right there in the middle.
Okay.
Have I transformed?
Not really.
I carry too much
of my past with me.
Am I free to be who I am?
Yes.
And with that,
perhaps transformation isn't
the central issue after all.
Reimagine living this time
Looking back on
where we've been
We'll leave them all behind
No one has a name
for what we'll find
You know, this
is a transition thing
for both of us, actually.
Are you liking it there?
Yes, it's beautiful here.
It's really beautiful.
I think this is a good move.
If you need anything,
let me know.
Well, I really don't even
think about that, you know.
Between my age
and my background.
I'll be living alone
the rest of my life,
and that's okay, you know.
That's, this is nice.
I can learn to be me.
Excuse me.
Hi there.
- Oh hi.
- My name is Zoey,
and I live right down here.
I wonder if I could
ask you for a favor.
Uh, okay.
What kind of favor?
Well, I have this problem.
I can't reach the top shelf
of my kitchen cabinets.
And for some reason,
best known to himself,
when my son comes over,
he puts everything up there,
and he doesn't seem to realize
that they're empty for a reason.
He's got a tall wife,
and he seems to forget
that he has a short mom.
So I was wondering if you
could reach some stuff for me.
Please.
Okay, I'm Kate, by the way.
It's nice to meet you.
And this is my partner Max.
- My best friend.
- Hi Max.
Okay let's go down here.
Okay.
I gotta tell you,
I really admire
that you're tall.
As a matter of fact,
I envy your height.
It's very challenging
to be this short.
Oh, I would think so.
Absolutely.
But I don't think I'm
gonna grow at this point.
- I think.
- Oh probably not.
This is a great place to live.
I think you're
gonna like it here.
Everybody cares
about everyone else.
It's like we're living
among old people,
but we don't realize we're old.
Who are all these old people?
It's right over there.
This cabinet on the top shelf.
So didn't I see you at
First Unitarian last week?
No, I just moved in.
Oh, where'd you come from?
Laramie, Wyoming.
Wow, Wyoming.
Does everyone dress
like that in Wyoming?
No, most people wear jeans.
Well, that's pretty
unique, I'll say that.
- Okay.
- Thanks a lot, you know?
I keep meaning to get a stool,
and I keep forgetting.
But now with neighbors like you,
who needs a stool, right?
Right, well, I'm glad to help.
Well how about sticking around
and having a cup of tea?
- I have, I have...
- Oh come on, come on come on.
Just say yes.
It's just a cup of
tea, no commitment.
Okay, yeah, sure.
Okay, let me get some.
How about some cheese
and crackers with that?
Oh, alright.
Mm, now that I think of it,
how about some wine instead?
Sure, why not?
You know, one of the good
things about getting old
is that we can drink
whenever we want.
We don't have to ask
anyone's permissions.
Oh that's plenty.
Thank you.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
So did you come
here alone, Kate?
I did.
My partner died four years ago.
I'm really sorry to hear that.
Well yeah, thanks.
But you know,
just in case you
might be interested,
I know a lot of single people.
Oh, I don't need that.
Thank you very much.
Well, amen to that.
Have some more wine, Kate.
It's good for you.
Cheers.
Cheers.
Riding 'round roads I know
Feeling change in the wind
Golden fields, tall grass
I had become friends
with Albert in fourth grade.
He was my age,
and lived in a brown brick house
on the other end
of the next block.
This was the 1950s,
a time when people didn't
talk about their bodies.
And my family certainly didn't.
Imagine me, imagine you
Hey Danny, here it is.
Said you liked 'em.
That's real neat.
My uncle has one.
Without your love
Hey.
What are you doing?
Why did you take that?
Think it's pretty?
Mm-hmm.
What do you like about it?
I like the color, patterns.
It's beautiful.
That's why I like
playing down here so much.
There's more.
It's okay.
What's the name?
Thank you for inviting
me to this, Zoey.
Any time, Kate.
As I went down to
the river to pray
Studying about
that good old way
And who shall wear
the starry crown
Good lord, show me the way
O sisters, let's go down
Let's go down, come on down
O sisters, let's go down
Down to the river to pray
As I went down to
the river to pray
Studying about
that good old way
Thanks for coming.
- That was so nice.
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
- That music
was just wonderful.
I saw Sue this morning.
They're back from their trip.
Oh, where'd they go this time?
I forget.
Montana, doesn't matter.
I have to tell you something.
Well, before they
went on their trip,
John and I got together,
and we went hiking.
It was wonderful.
We had this fabulous trip,
and we stopped at
this perfect spot.
And well, it proceeded
and let me tell you,
John has a lot of stamina.
There we were, you know.
Really going at it.
Good grief, woman.
Don't you know
you're not supposed
to put your paws on some
other woman's husband?
No, he's not married.
Well, then have at it.
You will, anyway.
Oh, Andrea.
Hi.
- That was gorgeous.
- Oh thank you.
- Just gorgeous.
- Thank you,
thanks very much.
We have some new people.
Yeah, I thought I saw
some new faces over here.
Do you know Zoey?
No, no, hi Zoey.
Hi, nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.
And this is Kate.
Hi Kate.
Hi Andrea.
Nice to meet you.
Oh, my pleasure.
- Please stay, have a seat.
- Come on, have a seat.
- Join us.
- Oh we want to see you.
- Alright.
- Have a seat, have a seat.
Meet Kate.
Your public wants you.
Really nice evening, huh?
Yeah, yeah,
it's been a really
great evening.
So, I haven't seen you
at one of our concerts before.
Oh yeah, I just
moved to Portland.
You were great, by the way.
Oh, thanks.
Maybe you'd like to
join us sometime.
Oh no, I ruined
my voice years ago.
You don't want to hear me sing.
Oh well, if you
ever change your mind,
come on over.
Okay.
So, I noticed you.
I've been admiring your
earrings and your necklace.
It's very pretty.
Thank you.
I was afraid maybe I'd dressed
too loud for the occasion.
No, no.
Anything goes around here.
So, no problem.
Have you lived in Portland long?
Yeah, I have.
How many years has it been now?
42 years.
Oh wow.
Yeah.
Almost a native.
So what are those
guys talking about?
I really don't know them.
You don't know them?
- My favorite subject.
- Yeah.
They seem to
be enjoying themselves.
They do seem to be
enjoying themselves.
I am too.
Oh yeah, me too.
Feeling a little shy, though.
Oh, yeah, me too.
Is Lilly always that way?
- Yeah.
- Oh.
When we met the other day,
I thought to myself, what
an interesting person.
I'd really like to
get to know her.
Oh.
Well, I don't know
how interesting I am.
So, Lilly told me
you'd been in the Coast Guard.
I was.
- 21 years.
- Wow.
I was in the Army, too.
But I liked the
Coast Guard, better.
Must have been
interesting to be out there
on a ship with all those guys.
Ha, well.
Most of my stations
were on shore.
So what brought you to Portland?
Well, I wanted to be
closer to my daughter.
She's up in Olympia.
I wanted to be able to see her
more than once a year.
I think I also wanted
to be in a bigger place.
So you're starting over.
Yep, 68 years old.
It took me a long
time to get here.
Oh gosh, after my divorce,
I moved to Portland.
And I worked as a librarian,
for 15, maybe 20 years.
And then I started
my own business.
And here I am.
Well, it seems funny that we can
sum up our lives in
just a few sentences.
Yeah.
We all know that there's
more to it than that,
- but, yeah.
- Yeah.
We've lived long lives, Kate.
Yep.
This is a nice
place you got here.
Well thanks.
Do you have it all to yourself?
Yeah, I do.
I don't have any roommates,
and I don't have a boyfriend.
Just some good girlfriends
and my business.
Yeah, sometimes relationships
can get so complicated.
You want to live life.
I want to live life.
Well, I hope you do.
You're so cute.
You're pretty cute yourself.
Oh thanks.
Hello?
Oh hi, Kate, this is Andrea.
Oh, Andrea.
Good morning.
Hi.
I hope I didn't wake you up.
Oh, no. I'm up.
I was thinking about
going shopping today
for some clothes,
and I wondered if you'd
like to go with me.
Oh, yeah, sure.
Okay.
I could get some things too.
Well don't sound too excited.
Oh no, I'd like to go with you.
It sounds like fun.
Well you get your breakfast,
and I'll pick you up
a little after noon.
Okay, okay, bye.
Bye.
How do you think that works?
It's nice, I like it.
Alright.
I liked it, too.
Well here's one I think
really delivers your message.
Wow, classy and feminine.
Well, I always thought
clothes made the woman.
Puberty can be tough.
Getting the wrong puberty
can be even worse.
And if you don't have people
around you who understand,
it can be devastating.
I made dinner.
Looks nice.
How is it?
Really good.
It's perfect.
No, let me.
Thank you.
Are you okay?
I'm fine.
No.
Something's wrong.
Not really.
Sorry.
Give me some more.
Al?
Al.
Your father's on his way home.
So you two should
get cleaned up.
Why didn't you tell me?
You're moving?
My dad told me you're moving.
Why didn't you tell me?
I didn't know, either.
Not until my mother
told me like a week ago.
But, my dad got
a job in Indiana.
So we have to go, too.
I'm sorry.
I'm never gonna have a
friend like you again, am I?
Listen.
They're gonna tear
the house down.
So...
Let's go downstairs
one more time.
Okay.
Albert was leaving.
His house was getting
torn down for the freeway.
Our secret haven was
being taken away.
It's just so unfair.
I think myself a lucky man
I never saw Albert again.
And it would be
more than 50 years
before I told anyone
about playing in his basement.
Over the winter of 1983,
I was an engineer
in the Coast Guard.
I was divorced,
and my daughter Casey was nine,
living with her mother.
I was alone and lonely,
and I had begun to dress
in women's clothes in private
to comfort myself.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Andrea
Happy birthday to you
And many more
Make a wish!
Oh yes!
Happy birthday!
Father and child
Holy infant so
tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly
When I met Linda,
I saw that she liked her wine,
but didn't think much about it.
Her father and older
brother were alcoholics.
And Linda was okay
with my cross-dressing.
At least at first.
How are the potatoes?
- They're good.
- Yeah?
Just right.
I made 'em the way you like 'em.
She was jealous
of the other woman.
Even though that was me.
Oh, you're probably
really tired, huh?
I don't really get that.
When people are tired
after traveling.
All I did was sit on a train.
Well, you must be looking
forward to Christmas.
Excited about it?
Not really.
I can't fit my presents
in my suitcase.
So I can't take them home.
Well, maybe that's okay.
Maybe they'll just
be here for you
when you come to visit.
What do you mean?
Well, we were thinking that
if you had your own room
and some of your own things,
that maybe you'd feel more
comfortable to come visit,
maybe a little more often.
Oh.
You know, your father
wanted to get you something
really special,
and we thought you'd like it.
You know, when I was little,
I was lucky to get a good job
from my parents once a year,
much less a new bicycle.
You should be grateful.
Casey.
Oh, just let her cool down, Dan.
She's just tired.
What are you doing?
You said yourself that
divorce is hard on children.
But she doesn't need
to punish you for it.
You just, you let
me handle this, okay?
Merry merry merry Christmas
Casey, this is
hard on both of us.
Can we just try to
not make it worse?
I came here to see you,
not your wino girlfriend!
Fly like an eagle.
Just like an eagle.
What are you watching?
Oh it's just this old cop show.
I like these.
Justice,
loyal, and German soldiers.
Any prisoner here is-
- You want to watch
something else?
No, this is fine.
Why'd you leave?
Well,
sweetie.
Your mother and I,
we decided that we would,
well, it'd be better for you,
and it'd be better for her,
if you stayed.
Well you know, your
school, your friends.
But why did you leave me?
Sweetie,
I wish it had been different.
I don't know, hon.
It's just, I'm sorry.
I am Major Hoffman.
Of the funeral staff.
Oh you are?
And why didn't you bring
your funeral with you?
Were my relationships difficult
because I didn't know who I was?
Couldn't be who I was.
Or did I just not know
how to love another?
When I didn't know
how to love myself.
It was fun spending
time with your friends.
Thanks for including me.
Oh, you're welcome.
I'm glad you could come over.
They're fun.
Yeah, they are.
So this is on me.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
You don't have to do that.
I want to.
Okay, well I'll
get the next time.
Okay.
So what sounds good to you?
If I get the dead guy
wings, will you share with me?
No.
No, that's entirely too messy.
Oh, yeah.
You could get 'em.
Yeah, but you're probably right.
Maybe I'll get the,
well, I don't know.
Casey's coming soon.
I'd love for you to meet her.
I would very much
like to meet her, too.
She sounds like
a wonderful girl.
Oh, I think so.
I'm very lucky.
Are you still in
touch with Casey's...
I...
Not very often.
They were with me
through the tough times.
We're friends.
That's nice.
So, since we're telling
each other stories
about our past relationships,
I'll tell you about
my first marriage.
It was really quite awful.
A couple years into it,
I met another teacher,
and we had an affair.
Turned out to be seven
of the nine years
that I was married.
When I was 29,
I realized that I couldn't
stay married to two guys
for the rest of my life.
And so, I divorced 'em
both and moved to Oregon.
Oh, good for you.
Well, that was a long time ago.
Yeah, it was.
You know, I think we make
the best decisions that
we can at the time.
Yeah.
And they end up
being our stories.
And without them,
we wouldn't be where we are now.
That's true.
I like where we are today.
Yeah, I do too.
I'll just get my keys.
After we'd lived in Laramie
for a couple of years,
Linda got sick.
Now, I'll be right back.
The diagnosis
was that it was terminal.
Unless she could stop drinking.
After several
tries, she gave up,
resigned to her fate.
Oh...
Where is it, where is it,
where is it, where
is it, where is it?
God damn it!
No no, no no, no no
no no no no no, no no.
Where is the opener?
I threw it away.
Well then I'll just
push the cork down.
I've done it plenty!
That's pathetic!
You're pathetic!
What would Casey think
if she knew about you?
If she knew you liked
to wear women's clothes!
- You're killing yourself!
- I bet she'd love
to know that!
Linda, you are killing yourself.
You are.
As she became sicker,
I had to spend more and more
time taking care of her.
She resented that.
Is it too hot?
Well it's, a little bit.
- It'll be okay.
- Okay.
Thank you.
After Linda died in '07,
I worked to put my
life back together.
She and I had been
good together,
but her decline had stretched
me all too close to breaking.
I blamed her and her drinking
for the misery of
the last few years.
And I blamed myself for my
inadequacies in helping her.
Your succulents are fake.
I'm sorry for your loss.
I don't know what to
say at these things.
It's okay, Bruce.
She was too young.
But, you're gonna feel better.
You're gonna be okay.
Thank you, it's nice
of you to say that.
I needed to hear it.
Oh, and thank you for
all of your help today.
And if you need
anything else, you know,
I'll do whatever.
Right, thank you.
Thanks for coming.
Of course.
Okay.
Let us know if you
need anything, okay?
I will, thank you for coming.
No problem.
See you in church, okay?
Okay, alright.
Doing okay?
Yeah.
Did you at least
get something to eat?
I'm just glad it's over.
Well, it was a
beautiful service.
You did a great job.
Thank you.
I'm glad you could
come up for this.
Me too.
I wanted to be here.
Is that your old bike?
Yeah.
Yeah.
The...
Brings back
memories, doesn't it?
Linda and I rode everywhere.
That's how we found Laramie.
We went out to the
Rocky Mountains,
and just started
thinking of moving West.
Dad.
I'm sorry that Linda and
I were never that close.
Look, I know that was
a difficult relationship
for you both.
I wanted to like her.
I did, I just...
It was a tough time.
There is this.
Well, I hate to even say this,
but there's a small part of me
that's relived that...
I feel guilty for
even thinking that.
I mean, that's...
That's bad, isn't it?
No.
You loved her so much.
You took care of
her for so long.
Now it's time to live your life.
Can I tell you something?
I need to tell you something.
Yeah, of course.
I wish I had mentioned
it a long time ago.
Okay.
I find comfort in
wearing women's clothes.
Some of this still
doesn't make sense to me,
but I've grown to accept it.
Some things just
don't make sense.
Here.
What do you think?
Well,
it's age appropriate.
I suppose it is.
I'm sorry.
No, it's okay.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Are you okay?
I'm okay, I'm okay.
- Okay.
- Are you okay?
Yeah, I will be.
- Okay.
- Alright.
Come on, let's forget this.
Okay, show me that bike.
Hey Kate.
Are you okay?
Oh yeah.
I'm fine.
I just, I'm a little in
my head this afternoon.
Would you like me to let
you go home to take a nap?
Oh, no.
No, no, I'm having
a wonderful time.
So am I.
So am I.
This is really, really pretty.
It is a pretty place.
Beautiful picture.
Looks like Wyoming.
It is.
I love that painting.
Great, appreciate it.
It's nice to be here.
Well, I'm glad you're here.
This must be Casey.
Yeah, that's her.
Yeah...
I loved her the
moment she appeared.
And I wasn't always there
when she was crying out.
I had a little growing
up to do myself.
Want to see my flutes?
Yeah.
That's beautiful.
So that's what I was saying.
What makes it unusual
is that it's white oak,
almost all the floors
you see are red oak,
and those are white, white oak.
God, did I tell you about
trying to permit my greenhouse?
And you know what,
that's invasive.
You should tear that out.
I don't know plants.
Well, it shouldn't be there.
It looks nice what
you did with it,
but it should go.
So between the setbacks
from the property line,
and the minimum distance
between buildings,
I don't have a greenhouse
big enough to do anything,
and let alone, do
all my research.
But you know,
well what the heck?
Who are they to say?
And the thing is,
you don't even need a permit
for an agricultural
building out in the county.
But in the city, you can't
get an agricultural permit.
- Hey Bruce, Bruce.
- What?
Bruce, can I,
look, can I talk to
you for a second?
Yeah.
I'd like to tell you
something about myself.
Okay.
I'm transgender.
What does that mean?
Well,
when I was little,
I wanted to be a girl.
But I didn't know how it worked.
I just thought my body
would heal itself.
Shut up.
I've dressed in women's
clothes most of my life.
I don't know how far
I'll pursue this,
but it's time for me to
be more open about it.
How much time do you
think you have left?
Maybe 30 years?
- Well...
- 20?
Yeah, yeah I hope so.
That's a long time
to not be happy.
- Yeah.
- Right?
I suppose it is.
You're gonna stay though, right?
You're not gonna
move off somewhere.
Yeah, I need my home, and
my friends, my community.
Okay, okay.
Those will be imperative for me
to feel like I can move forward.
'Cause I got your back here.
If you go off to...
- Right.
- San Francisco.
I don't know.
Thanks Bruce.
You know, when
you pull that out,
you gotta get the roots, too.
You gotta take it
all the way down,
and you gotta watch it,
and if it comes back,
you gotta pull every bit of it.
Maybe you ought to burn it.
- Okay.
- I'll do it.
- Okay.
- I'll do it tonight.
Do it, I'll go make
more cookies right now.
Alright.
It seems like everyone
has always wanted me
to be something else.
Even I have wanted it.
But Andrea seems to
want me to just be me.
There's a bench over here.
Do you mind if we sit down?
No, that'd be fine.
Beautiful here.
Oh, it sure is, Kate.
So, Kate.
I have the sense you were
born into a male body.
Well, you're right.
I thought of it as
being out of register.
You know, like when the colors
of an image don't line up.
Somehow, wearing women's clothes
gave me a break from
pretending to be a man.
The pressure kept building
to do something.
When I was finally
able to transition,
it was just,
amazing.
It was so wonderful.
I'm so proud of you.
Bless you.
You're just wonderful.
Am I?
Kate, you're such an
interesting and complex person.
Am I?
Yeah, you are.
It's funny, I was always
so forgettable as this guy,
but people seem to
remember me now.
You're wonderful.
Well, I don't know about that.
Well, I think you're wonderful.
Thank you.
There's something I've
wanted to tell you today.
You remember a couple weeks ago,
we got to sit next to
each other in church
for the first time.
Sing in my heart
Well, we were
singing "Spirit of Life,"
and at some point,
your voice dropped into its
natural baritone register.
Lies in the sea
Move in the hand
Giving life the
shape of justice
Truth hold me close
Grace, set me free
I literally
felt my heart crack open.
It was a physical sensation.
And I looked at you
and I said to myself,
"You have just fallen in
love with this woman."
Really?
Yeah, really.
But you've always been with men.
I know.
I know. I've been
married to two men.
But now I find that
I have fallen in love
with a transgender woman.
I think I've scared you.
Well, well, I, I,
I didn't expect this, Andrea.
Well, Kate, I didn't
expect it either,
but here we are.
Let's just see where this goes.
Oh, okay, okay.
You don't need to say anything.
Take care.
I love you.
Ah.
See if my knees will work.
It's easy to love Andrea.
She's just so smart
and kind and confident.
It's harder to accept
that she loves me.
But I need to be free.
Do I dare to try
to love someone,
to make space for
her to love me?
Oh gosh, what's, what's up?
Uh oh.
Hello?
Oh hi Zoey, it's Andrea.
Andrea, hi, what's up?
Well, it's about Kate.
Kate?
What happened to
Kate, what's wrong?
She's fine, she's fine.
It's just that I told her
tonight that I love her.
So wow, do you love her?
Yeah, I do.
Well, that's cool.
So what's the problem?
Well, I'm not supposed to
fall in love with a woman.
Oh baloney, come on.
Man, woman.
You know, it doesn't
really matter.
The big gift is love.
You find love, you
gotta go for it.
Oh my gosh.
But what if I scared her?
Really?
Kate's been in the Army,
she's been in the Coast Guard.
I doubt that she
scares so easily.
Well, she sure didn't
say anything back.
I think she just didn't
know what to say.
She didn't know what
to do with that.
Well, you know
she's more reserved.
But I think she's
got the hots for you.
Do you think so?
It's obvious.
You'd have to be blind
not to notice it.
Wow.
Well, it's
sure taken my by surprise.
Well, we gave you some space.
The rest is up to you.
I should let you go to sleep.
I think, I think I'll be fine,
and I think that I'll
get a good night's sleep,
and I think,
I think I love her.
No worries.
I got a really good
feeling about this,
so just want you to know that.
Goodnight, dear.
Now what, Max? These people...
Hello?
Hey Zoey, it's Kate.
Ah Kate, what's up?
I didn't wake you up, did I?
Wake me?
Nah, I was just reading,
like I always do in the
middle of the night.
Oh, oh good.
Well, it's Andrea.
What about Andrea?
Is something wrong?
Oh, everything's fantastic.
She told me she
loved me tonight.
Oh wow.
That's cool.
So what'd you do?
Well I didn't know what to say.
I was just, I was floored.
I mean, it was,
I didn't know that
was a possibility.
Well, you know,
I hope I didn't
screw anything up.
Oh, I'm sure you
didn't screw up.
Andrea's a smart cookie.
She'll get it.
Yeah, well I,
I'm a woman now.
I thought I'd fall
in love with a man,
but here's Andrea.
She's wonderful.
You know, as you always tell me,
what's so great about men?
Yeah.
But, just so you know,
I have a really good
feeling about this.
I want you to know that.
Oh, oh thank you. I hope so.
So can I go back to sleep now?
Oh, okay Zoey.
Thanks.
Relax.
Bye.
Geeze, Max.
Really, these
people, they're nuts.
Not like my dog.
You're a wise boy.
These are for you, mom.
I know you don't
like flowers, dad.
I didn't bring you any.
The trees have grown a lot
since I was here last.
I didn't really want to come by.
Not because, well...
If you could see me,
you would see things are
a little different.
When I was young,
you told me I was a boy.
Though I didn't doubt
that I was male,
I could see that, but...
Somehow I knew that
I should be a girl.
That I would be
happier as a girl.
That I would fit into the
world better as a girl.
I didn't know how bodies
worked, of course.
I remember when I was little,
being always so hopeful each
night when I went to bed.
Before falling
asleep, I would just,
I would think, well,
perhaps tonight is the night
when this extra
stuff just falls off.
Like how a scab falls off when
the skin underneath heals.
Well then everyone would
see that I'm a girl.
But I want to tell
you both now that,
I've finally figured it out.
I'm just sorry that
I wasn't able to
get it all together
soon enough to show you.
'Cause I think your
reaction would be,
"Well, now it all makes sense."
I just want you to know that
your troubled and
troublesome third child,
who could never really
quite find himself,
well,
she has turned out alright.
So I was finally done.
I didn't know if this
day would ever come.
I was ready to move
on to my life as Kate.
Sometimes it's easier if I act
as if you'd never been.
But I wouldn't have gotten
here without you, Danny.
I love you.
Are you feeling okay?
Yeah.
I feel pretty good, actually.
- Yeah?
- All things considered.
I even took a few
steps around the room,
and that's...
That's good.
Well, Dr. Bauer said
that she did a great job,
and that the surgery
was a success.
Yeah.
- Yeah, she told me that too.
- That's good.
Casey, I know this
is hard on you.
But I'll always be your father.
You know,
a few months ago,
I went to visit my
friends down in the South,
and it was just so wonderful
to walk down the
street as a woman.
No hiding, no shame.
Sometimes a man would open,
hold the door open for me.
And it felt real nice
to be treated as a lady.
People have been so kind to me.
And I know, I know that not
everyone's journey is like mine.
But it just seems like
this secret that
I held so tightly,
hid so well for 65 years,
was far more interesting to me
than to anyone else.
It's been two years
since I got to be Kate.
It's been wonderful,
beyond my wildest dreams.
Andrea sure is a gift.
Maybe certain people
come into our lives
to help us be who we are,
and to help us get
to be who we can be.
You're beautiful, Kate.
I'm glad you think so.
I wish you could see
yourself as beautiful.
I'll try.
You say it.
I'm beautiful?
Say it like you mean it.
I'm beautiful.
You are beautiful.
I don't think you would've
gone through all of this
if you didn't think
you were beautiful.
Well,
it became more a
matter of survival.
I didn't know how much
longer I'd make it as,
what's his name.
I like you just
as you are, Kate.
Well, I sure didn't expect this.
Oh, I didn't
expect this, either.
You want to take
your jacket off?
I haven't done this in a while.
I haven't either.
You might have questions.
Whatever is just fine.
Stuck.
You have a tattoo.
Come with me.
I'm not that heavy.
Here I come.
Hi Kate.
Hi Andrea.
I have a Yoga class
first thing Monday morning,
so I just took off.
Oh, I had wondered
where you'd gone.
Yeah, I'm sorry to worry you.
Oh, that's okay.
Would you like to come in?
Oh, no thanks.
I can only stay
for just a second.
Everything okay?
Well...
Yeah, I guess so.
But, would you be okay
if we took a break here
for a little bit?
What kind of break?
Well, I don't know.
One of my brothers is in
town for a little while,
so I'd like to at least
wait until he's gone, and,
see how I'm feeling.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
I'm sorry.
I'll be in touch, okay?
Actually, that's not it at all.
I'm struggling here, Kate.
I'm not supposed to have
fallen in love with a woman.
But I have.
And I'm not sure
what to do about it.
I need some time to
sit with that, and,
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
Thank you.
I will be in touch.
I'll call you.
- Okay.
- Okay, bye.
Hello, this is Andrea.
Please leave a message,
- and I will call you back.
- Andrea opened
the door to love.
Loving me has to be way
outside her comfort zone.
But whatever happens,
it was really wonderful
to have that little glimpse
of the sweet, powerful
love that she offered.
Oh Katie, where
did you come from?
Where did you come from?
You sure you live here?
This is it.
Wow.
I love it.
Yeah, it's the first
time I used a designer.
Alright.
Can I?
Sure, go ahead.
So do you want to go
somewhere tomorrow,
or do you just want to hang out?
I'm okay with whatever.
How are you and Thomas doing?
He's gone back to school.
Oh, that's good.
That's good.
Mama Kate, you're acting
more like my father today.
It's weird, but I'm kinda
happy to have him back.
You said a few months ago
that I'm pretty much the same.
Well, Papa had this...
I don't know, I guess
you'd call it, like,
an underlying sadness.
And when you got
to me, Mama Kate,
I didn't see that anymore,
but today, I see it again.
Well,
these last few weeks,
I've just been bolling
over with happiness.
I didn't know one person
could even be that happy.
I met a friend,
and she's become
more than a friend.
And I,
I'm waiting for her
to come to her senses,
and leave me.
Why would you say that?
Well, I bring a lot
of baggage with me,
and maybe I'm too old
to start all this again.
I can be happy living alone.
Mama Kate, I'm on my
second marriage, right?
And I'm going to make this work.
I am going to give
everything I have
to make this one work.
And if it doesn't,
'cause they don't always,
at least I will
know that I tried,
and it sounds so dumb,
but I know that I
would love again.
We can't help it, you know?
It's like, how we're built.
I'm glad for you, Casey.
You've been through a lot.
You know how your
neighbor has a love bird?
I thought it was a parrot.
Mama, that's what
love birds are.
Oh.
Anyways, they only
have one of them,
and they're not
supposed to be alone.
They don't do well.
They get erratic in captivity.
Some people are just
meant to pair up.
If you really like this person,
as much as it seems you do,
then I think that you should try
and give everything you
can to be with them.
It's funny, Mama Kate.
I feel like I can talk to you
more than I ever
could with Papa.
Yeah.
It's nice.
Yeah.
Oh Casey and
her talk of love birds.
Actually, all birds
shed their feathers
and replace them with new ones.
Maybe that's what
I've needed to do
so that I could find love.
And let myself be loved.
So Tom.
Yeah?
And Tom Flynn, down.
I've met someone.
And I believe I've
fallen in love.
He was 10 for 14.
Under 10 yards.
That's the patience
part we talked about.
Did you hear me?
Yeah, I heard you.
You fell in love.
Yeah, I've fallen in love.
Her name is Kate.
Really?
Yep.
You know, it seemed like
you might be happier
with a woman.
Well Tom, it sure
feels that way.
I don't think I've
ever been in love.
Someone knocked it away.
John Elway, he did
a quarrel on that.
There's a little
more to the story.
He's gonna spin right around.
She was born transgender.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Okay I'm gonna sit down.
I better sit down
for this, I can see.
Oh Tom.
She's just wonderful.
One handed catch by Van Johnson.
You know,
the message I got from
Dad, I'm sure it was Dad,
was that I was supposed to
fall in love with a man,
be married to a man,
and be taken care of by a man.
Johnson makes the tackle,
or the catch when he's down.
So to fall in love with a woman
has presented a challenge to me.
You know, do I
listen to my heart,
do I listen to the
message in my head?
That's
why Dan Reeves was so upset.
And it's been a struggle,
but it just comes
down to my heart.
I, I love her.
And she loves me.
What can be wrong with that?
Would you get that?
Sure?
Oh, hi.
You must be Casey.
Are you Andrea?
I am.
Come in, please.
Mama Kate's just putting
some things away in the back.
Let me get her for you.
Hey Mama Kate, Andrea's here.
She'll be really
happy to see you.
I'll be happy to see her, too.
It's very nice to meet you.
You too.
Hi Andrea.
Hi Kate.
How are you?
I'm okay.
How are you?
I think I'm gonna go
lay down for a little bit.
It was really nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you too, Casey.
Love you.
Good luck.
Can we sit down?
Sure.
Kate, the words to love songs
have never made any sense to me.
It was just like a language
I didn't understand.
Until I met you.
And now I get it.
I love you, Kate.
Well, I feel like my
life has just started,
and I'm already pushing 70.
Sometimes, I wonder if I'll
even make it another 10 years.
I want to make most of
these years that I do have.
Once I got to be Kate,
I was living just
the perfect life.
I didn't think it was
possible to be happier.
But with you, I am.
I love you, Andrea.
I love you, Kate.
I feel like such
a mess sometimes.
Oh, we all do.
And I worry that I might
lose my mind someday.
If that happened, would
you take care of me?
I'd take care of you.
We could take care
of each other.
Do you wish I
hadn't transitioned?
That I was still
pretending to be a man?
Oh Kate.
I wouldn't have given
you a second look,
'cause you're too short.
Well.
Hey, do you like road trips?
I think a road trip with
you would be fantastic.
Do you know that Johnny Cash
song, "I've Been Everywhere."
I've been everywhere, man
Yeah, I like Johnny Cash.
Yeah, how'd you like to go
to all those places in the song?
All those places?
How many are there?
There are 92 of 'em.
- They're all over the place.
- Oh my gosh.
Well, what's the closest one?
I think Crater Lake.
Well, that's just down the road.
Do you want to go?
I do.
How about next week?
Let's go, Katie bird.
I love you, Andrea.
I love you, Kate.
Something inside of
me that had to be said
Like a sunburn burning
in the back of my head
Like a needle pulling an
unseen thread all my life
I can see it coming
But I just couldn't say
What tomorrow brought
'Cause I was stuck in today
Was a light so bright
It would shine my way to you
It was always there,
it was written that way
It was always there,
it was written that way
It was always there
Just something
that I had to do
It was always there
It was written that way
It was always there
It was written that way
It was always there
Just something
that I had to do
I was toting my pack along
a dusty Winnemucca road
When along came a semi with a
high and canvas covered load
If you're going
to Winnemucca, Mac
With me you can ride
And so I climbed
into the cab
And then I settled
down inside
He asked me if
I'd seen a road
With so much dust and sand
And I said, listen
I've traveled every
road in this here land
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I've breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I've been to Reno,
Chicago, Fargo, Minnesota
Buffalo, Toronto,
Winslow, Sarasota
Wichita, Tulsa,
Ottowa, Oklahoma
Napa, Panama,
Mattawa, La Paloma
Bangor, Baltimore,
Salvador, Amarillo
Tocopilla, Barranquilla,
and Padilla
I'm a killer
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I've been to Boston,
Charleston, Dayton, Louisiana
Washington, Houston,
Kingston, Texarkana
Monterey, Faraday,
Santa Fe, Tallapoosa
Glen Rock, Black Rock,
Little Rock, Oskaloosa
Tennessee to Hennessey
and Chicopee, Spirit Lake
Grand Lake, Devil's Lake,
Crater Lake, for Pete's sake
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I been to Louisville,
Nashville, Knoxville, Ombabika
Shefferville, Jacksonville,
Waterville, Costa Rica
Pittsfield, Springfield,
Bakersfield, Shreveport
Hackensack, Cadillac,
Fond Du Lac, Davenport
Idaho, Jellicoe, Argentina
Diamontina, Pasadena
Catalina, see
what I mean, man
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
I crossed the
deserts bare, man
I breathed the
mountain air, man
I traveled, I
had my share, man
I've been everywhere
I've been to
Pittsburgh, Parkersburg
Gravellburg, Colorado
Ellensburg, Rexburg,
Vicksburg, Eldorado
Larrimore, Atmore,
Haverstraw, Chattanika
Chaska, Nebraska,
Alaska, Opelika
Baraboo, Waterloo,
Kalamazoo, Kansas City
Sioux City, Cedar City,
Dodge City, what a pity
I've been everywhere, man