Stuffings (2021) Movie Script
0
You have spoken to
the police commissioner?
Yes, yes, he's fully aware.
He knows to leave us all alone.
Our mayor buys him off
with whine and cheese.
That's good to hear.
How long until you start?
Only in a few minutes now.
George, where's my cup of tea?
Sorry dear.
You still broadcast by radio?
It's a dying media, I know.
Everyone streams and downloads nowadays.
Do you know my grandson
saw my hand radio last week
and asked, what's that?
I guess anyone random listening in
would bore easily.
I had the
thought recently, you know,
what young people nowadays
find to be the scariest
sound in the whole world?
Silence.
Uh, hello?
Hello council member, hello?
See, unnerving isn't it?
Kids can't handle it.
Everything gets faster,
louder, and flashier.
Silence is so uncomfortable.
You make a good point.
George, my cup of tea.
Yeah, I better
let you get started.
This is your 20th year.
Best of luck, council member.
Counting down, thank you.
George, tea.
I am live in 10,
nine,
eight,
seven,
six,
five,
four,
three.
Community
broadcast is commencing.
Community broadcast is commencing.
Good evening, Hills residents.
Thank you for joining in.
Tonight, we are going to
do the candidate lottery.
First candidate, it is
green ball number 13.
Red ball number 11.
Silver ball number 19.
Shit.
And now, Hills residents,
we come to the lottery
for the second candidate.
First ball is silver ball number seven.
Second ball is green ball number five.
Third ball is red ball number 14.
Thank God, thank God.
This is Andy's first
time trying a bubble tea.
Now, I'm just
reminding the Hills residents,
there have two more lotteries to come.
I'm gonna go over those numbers again.
It's a silver number seven,
it's a green number five
and it's a red number 14.
Remember, there are 12
days to go till Christmas.
I do wish you all the very best of luck.
Go on Hannah, stand next to it.
I really don't want to.
Why not?
It's weird.
It's Santa Claus.
It's not Santa Claus,
it looks like crap.
Just let me film you with it,
it'll make a great video
to send to grandma.
That's great, smile Hannah,
say Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas.
Aw come on, get down closer to it.
I'll get a shot of him
with his arm around you.
No, you.
It's not going to bite,
it'll take two seconds.
Merry Christmas.
Look at the camera.
My makeup looks so bad.
Really?
I think this looks amazing.
What, my makeup?
No, our faces!
Okay.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy back,
rocking the world again.
We have come out today
and Andy has let me be in
charge of what we're eating,
so I have just a normal chicken burger
and Andy has the spiciest
burger on the menu.
What's up YouTube?
We are back again.
We've just done a full
day worth of shopping.
My feet are killing me.
As you can see, Andy is blindfolded today
and that is because I finally received
something I've been
waiting for so long to get.
It's spicy?
I love animals
and I'm so excited to
pet the little kangaroos
and the little wallabies.
This is amazing, I can't
believe he's so chill.
Oh my God.
What do you think it is?
That's clothing.
Yeah, but what do you think is on it?
You didn't.
Oh, no way!
Yeah, we got the shirt.
Okay, so we've just hit
two million subscribers
and Bec doesn't know
this, but to celebrate,
I'm actually going to propose.
You could all like and subscribe.
And then like and subscribe.
To like and subscribe
and rate and ring the
bell for notifications.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy here, rocking
the world once again.
Too right,
we're stoked about the amount of views
in our last big post.
Keep it up, peeps, huge love to you all.
We are back, bigger and better than ever
and this Christmas season,
we're taking a trip around our home state.
Staying at home sucks,
so this Christmas,
we're spreading our wings
with a the real big road trip.
We want you all there for very big moment.
We could not have done it
without our subscribers and sponsors
and this video is actually
sponsored by Cover U.
It is the greatest new app
that provides you with online protection
and extra phone coverage in
dark and dangerous places.
Cover U is the only way
to let your friends know
that it's actually you and
not your dangle ganger.
Doppelganger.
What?
It's doppelganger,
you said dangle ganger.
No I said, no, that's what I said.
No you didn't, let's do it again.
No, just leave it alone,
I said the right thing, Bec.
The sponsors will cut ties
if we don't get this accurate.
Why don't we just keep it in
and I'll edit you correcting
me out, it'll be fine.
I told you, the marketing person
said we have to be
accurate with their script
when mentioning their product.
Let's just do it again,
stop being stubborn.
This is such bullshit.
I hate this stuff, the
app doesn't even work.
I don't care, Andy,
do you want to keep
doing this stuff or not?
We get a new sponsor every two months,
so let's just screw this
up and we'll get a new one.
I'm not building a bad
reputation with this guy, Andy.
Stop being so stubborn,
let's just do it again.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy here, rocking the world.
Seriously?
You're going to be a
dick, that's the plan?
I'm trying to be funny.
I can't do this right now.
What are you doing?
You're driving me
nuts, I need some space.
Women.
How sick would it be
if I caught a car accident,
or like someone breaking
a law or something?
Why is that sick?
Have you not seen how many hits
accidents and road rage videos get?
Plus like, it would get
us some new exposure.
Yeah, people
make mistakes too, Andy.
Are you really going to
punish them for that?
Dude, we just capture it.
The general public can
decide who is the idiot.
Why isn't there
any money in my account?
Andy, where's my money?
Wait, what are these transactions?
Audio equipment, competitive
edge gaming chairs?
Did you spend all my money on shit?
It's popular set designing.
If we don't have it,
we'll just look like losers online.
Who says that?
The people remember.
If it trends, we have to have it.
I'll tell you what
I'd like, money in my account.
We have bills, Andy,
rent, electricity, phone bills,
and let's not forget, we eat
out almost every second night.
This stuff exists.
Oh man, I'm so glad we're camping out.
All right.
Day one, Christmas vacation,
hot Australian summer,
classic bushfire territory,
danger lurks all around, snakes, spiders.
Are you gonna help me?
You feeling scared, Bec?
Not at all.
I know we're covered with our Cover U app,
I don't leave home without it.
Perfect.
It's going to be an amazing adventure.
I can't wait to see what we find.
Now seriously, Andy, help me.
This is such a beautiful place.
I wish all our fans were here with us.
Don't forget to lock the car.
Hey, did you get the GoPro?
It's on your head.
Our last video has a decreased
viewership of 54 thousand.
We're slipping and we need
to do something bolder.
Even our subscriber rate has halted.
Well, what do you suggest then?
Oh, I don't know, this?
This is not what people want to see.
Unless you can find a
waterfall to jump off naked,
or get lost in a storm on an unused path,
or something exciting.
You know,
not every video we do has
to have a hook or a gimmick.
You're the one with the business agenda.
You can't see this being a problem.
Wait, did you hear that?
Hear what?
Exactly, nothing.
I don't want to talk about
statistics or subscribers
or business tactics right now.
What do you wanna talk about?
Nothing.
I just want to enjoy the silence for once.
This is meant to be a holiday.
People want to see our holiday.
Andy, just one hour, okay?
One hour to what?
Just shut the fuck up.
Hard week, Feary?
You can say that.
What's this?
Girl you're looking for?
I suspect by now, she's out
near Darlington's place.
You have everything set here?
Three sheep, they're waiting.
Good.
Remember, you call the
council every time one falls.
Hey, do I look like an idiot, pal?
I know what I'm doing here.
Feary?
Yeah.
Cut back on the drink, would you?
You wanna change positions?
Look, I got a kid in town, all right?
Broken marriage.
I haven't seen him two years.
I'm sorry for you.
I'm heading down there
and see him in the morning.
I'm sure you will.
I love these undisturbed places.
You know, when I can't sleep at night,
this is what I picture.
You can talk now, doofus.
If we make enough money,
we can buy a place out here.
I think we'd need a much
larger viewership for that
and maybe an e-sports contract
and let's face it, you know,
neither of us are very good
at finger slapping a joystick.
Well, it is Christmas.
Tis the season to wish.
Wish?
People wish everyday, Christmas
just puts a ribbon on it.
You know, maybe we shouldn't spoil this.
The more people that move out here,
the more litter we'll find, so, come on.
What on earth is that?
Looks like some kind of scarecrow Santa.
Oh look, there's another one.
Oh God, something died in this one.
What's up guys and girls?
Check this out.
I'm here in Adelaide
Hills with my girl, Bec,
and we have come across
the strangest site,
a golf playing, scarecrow Santa
and this one over here is
playing hide and seek with Bec.
These are so weird, like
what a weird thing to set up?
Hey, pass me your phone for a second.
Thanks.
They look like chicken
wire and paper-mache to me,
but this is one cool dude Santa.
Apparently, the locals
of the Adelaide Hills
have placed out Santa's
scarecrows for decades
every December as a
sign of mischief and fun
for the festive season.
So people with way too
much time on their hands,
in other words.
I've got an idea, put your sunny's on.
I'm gonna get a mischief fun photo
with me and my main man.
This is cool.
This is a sweet tunnel.
I hope there's
not a homeless family
living in there.
No, but I think one of
those Santa statute things
is down there.
Oh fuck off, that is creepy.
Mischief, right?
You have to go first.
No way in hell, Andy, you go first.
Just go.
Look at all this graffiti.
Oh my goodness.
This could have been an old
bomb shelter or something.
Doubt it.
Well you never know, it could've been.
What do you know about bomb shelters?
Oh god, this is scary.
It smells like piss in
here Andy, lets keep moving.
Hello there, my friend.
All I want for Christmas
is for you not to kill me.
Keep going.
What, are you getting
scared, are you, Bec?
A little claustrophobic, yeah.
Claustrophobic, arachnophobic,
what aren't you fucking phobic of?
Seriously, is this
Christmas or Halloween?
I don't want us camping
anywhere near those things.
Oh, nice little log.
Hey Andy, did you bring the gas stove?
What?
The gas stove that I asked
you to get two days ago?
No, what for?
Uh, to cook our food, dumb ass.
What do you mean?
Isn't that your job?
Excuse me?
You can do this then.
What do I do with this?
Assemble it.
How to assemble tent.
Are you in a bar?
Since when did you start drinking?
Since last week.
Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm just looking for someone.
Oh, like a guy!
Good for you, about time.
What kinda guy are you looking for?
Like an older guy.
Yeah, they're more mature.
So what like, five, ten years?
No, more like 50.
You want a man who's about to drop dead?
More or less.
Do you want to marry him,
like, is everything okay?
No, no, look, I don't
think you'd understand
even if I tried to explain.
My grandfather is on life support.
Seriously?
No, stop.
I'm just trapped between
a rock and a hard place
and there's something that I
need to do before Christmas.
I just need a new tactic.
Wait, what's that?
Great, now there's ads on video call.
What ya doing?
Meditating.
I can do that.
What's this meant to do?
I'm practicing mindfulness,
so just focus on your breathing.
Fuck this shit.
Hard day at work, hon?
How was your day?
Is there anything else I can get for you?
Here you go.
Andy, are you fucking serious?
Is that creek water?
That's fucking disgusting.
What?
It's for the fans, it'll be funny.
Fuck the fans.
Andy, I cannot eat this cold.
Do we have anything else?
Can you put that away for one night?
Sorry, what?
I said, can you
put the laptop away?
Can you give me like 45 minutes.
Just checking our socials &
sending out Christmas greetings.
I can't believe how many channels
are giving away free gifts
and money for Christmas.
We should look at doing that next year.
What are you doing?
I'm right here, Andy.
Yeah, I can see that.
No, you don't.
I'm tired of this, I'm
so sick of the world
watching every little thing I do,
but where are you, Andy?
Is this our life?
Every week, another fucking subscriber,
another video and another
bell button to click.
I thought you loved all this.
I thought I did too,
but I was sold on an image.
I was just following the herd.
I thought it was normal, but
this feels like insanity.
I feel like I'm stuck in a machine.
Ugh.
I had so much porn saved on there.
Dear God, can you hear me?
Yes Hannah.
Please help me get out of here alive.
Don't count on it, Hannah.
But why?
It's Christmas time.
People die everyday, Hannah.
People die every day.
Ew.
Baby, I love the way you talk
The way you move and
the way you squawk
I'd like to keep you by my side
What are you doing?
I'm serenading you.
Andy?
Yes?
Singing is not your best attribute.
I see.
But thanks for trying.
Andy, did you make coffee?
Oh wait, I forgot.
We can't because he didn't
bring the gas stove.
Andy?
Andy?
Andy?
Hello?
Andy?
Andy?
This place really needs a new definition,
of fun and mischief.
Hey.
Did you make coffee?
Um, I'm seeing things.
Where have you been?
Giving you that extra peace.
Baden.
Dane.
Why are you spoiling my view?
Just returning from Kangarella,
looking for a young girl, about 12.
Blonde hair.
Still, have you tried McHarg Creek?
I was on my way there now.
It's almost midday.
The community is all secure?
I believe so.
I've been doing the rounds all week.
Sunset is estimated for half past eight.
How many?
Only one.
One?
Jesus.
Who was assigned this year?
Karla, Feary, and Mrs. Rosemont.
Mrs. Rosemont is 85 years old.
Where's Karla?
She's been doing roadside.
Feary snagged the male three days back
and is with the sacrificial mutton.
I've taken over for Mrs. Rosemont.
You are pushing everyone's luck.
It's not easy to keep a secret.
You better stop talking
to me and get back to it.
I'll let the neighbors know.
Right.
Are you okay, dear?
Not really.
I could get some help but,
something's happened with my engine.
I could call you a tow truck.
No, no, uh, I just need you to help me.
I'm not a grease monkey.
Please, I'm more than
happy to reward you.
Oh, I could call you a uh.
No, uh, no, don't worry, just.
This is taking way too long.
Hey pretty lady.
Need a hand?
Fuck off.
Just do it.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy here again.
Had a pretty hot night last night,
but I guess that's Christmas
in Australia for you.
I haven't slept in a tent since I was 14.
It wasn't too bad,
except for Andy farting the whole night
and turning it into a massive Dutch oven.
Hey, you know uncooked
beans will do that.
We are off to our next sweet spot
along the Heysen trail now.
It is just amazing to spend
Christmas Eve in the woods.
Let's do this.
Hello?
This is Rosemont speaking.
I've just noticed a young female
hitchhiking towards the Heysen trail.
This looks strange.
Ho, ho, ho.
On Christmas Eve, his face will show.
Protect the hills and he will go.
Four sacrifices will be made
from lamb and man until sun fades.
I don't get any of this.
Is this some kind of religious thing?
Seems a little removed for that.
Excuse me, excuse me.
Can you help me?
Hey, whoa, you all right, kid?
Are you locals?
No.
No, no, we're just camping out.
We're Bec and Andy, you
might've seen us online.
Oh yeah, I've seen some of your videos.
Good to meet a fan in
the middle of a dirt road.
I never said I was a fan.
Are you all right?
I need to go to the
city, a man's after me.
A man?
Did you do something wrong?
We should probably call the police.
Yeah.
No wait, we need to record this.
Not right now.
Yes now, remember our sponsor, Cover U?
What a plug?
One way to use the app and save the day.
This could be serious.
Yes, you're always talking
about keeping sponsors.
We do this,
they'll fund our videos
for the next 12 months,
not to mention, we'll be heroes.
Lost little girl in the
woods on Christmas Eve.
Sweetie, would you mind if we just
recorded us helping you?
Really?
Fine.
So, we've been walking around this road
for the last half an hour
and this poor little girl
has stumbled across us, lost.
I'm not lost.
Are you okay, what is your name?
Hannah.
And how old are you, Hannah?
Okay.
I'm going to use our Cover U app
to get Hannah some help and
get out location accurate.
Shit.
Okay wait.
Application error.
This app needs
to be restarted, hang on.
What do you mean?
Hey, we need to film this again.
Now my whole phone is spazzing out.
I told you this app doesn't even work.
Hannah wait, we're sorry.
It's okay.
I'll find some real adults to help me.
We're adults.
Barely.
Well come with us at least,
you shouldn't be out here alone.
I think I stand a
better chance on my own.
Well, where are you going?
To the bus stop, maybe
someone can help me there.
What about your parents?
Dead.
My parents are dead, all right?
Thanks for finally asking.
I told you guys, leave me alone.
We will, when we get you some help.
Are you going to try this house?
Don't trust the locals around here.
Another one of these cheap things.
They move.
Huh?
What did you just say?
I've seen them move.
You know what?
I'm sick of these things.
They're just straw and duct tape.
Filled with coal of all things.
Isn't that what Santa
gives to naughty children?
He's not real, the parents do it.
It's just a big mix up between
mythology and marketing
to make money.
Okay.
Smart kid.
40 years ago, this
thing didn't even exist,
so what happened?
I'll tell you what happened.
We grew out of excess waste
and everyone wanting a
slice of the good life.
I know you're frustrated,
but there's nothing we can do now.
Exactly.
Now, we are stuck with what we
created and who pays for it?
Children.
Baden, it's
Christmas, just be happy.
Yes, I'd hate to be the one
to spoil the day of cheer and joy,
I guess, I did become a
grumpy old scrooge, after all.
Listen.
Oh shit.
Shit.
I'm putting him back together.
I'm safe, I'm safe.
I'm safe.
I'm safe, I've put him back together.
I'm safe.
I'm safe, I'm safe.
Still three, that
doesn't make much sense.
Okay, so our car is about
an hour over that hill.
I'll get my phone, call for
help and get us out of here.
Someone's coming.
Hannah, wait.
That's the guy.
That guy?
Sleazebag scum!
What are you doing?
ID for the authorities.
Damn.
All right, you two go back to
the car, I'll meet you there.
Wait Andy,
our priority is to get
this girl to safety,
not by vigilante.
I can take that guy.
I film him, justice will be served.
Andy stop filming, don't be a hero!
Get back to the car,
I'll meet you there!
What do you think?
My dad says, if you
have nothing nice to say,
don't say anything at all.
What are you doing here?
Wind's blowing east.
It means an elder fell.
My job is done and if
you don't believe me,
you can ask the Henderson's
or Mrs. Rosemont.
But who?
Well, how am I to know?
Look, I am going home
and I'm not getting my hands dirty.
In fact, I'm moving states.
Fuck whatever you people unleashed.
Karla, there is still two more.
Well, you have a six and a half hours.
I'm sure you can deal with it.
Merry Christmas.
Andy log.
It's Christmas Eve.
My phone has mysteriously... broken.
I've located the property
of the pedophile chasing
after young Hannah.
I'm going down there.
It's my civil duty.
Wish me luck.
Well, if she won't cooperate,
we're just going to have to sacrifice her.
There must be something else we can do.
We don't have time, dear.
All right, all right, I'll get it done.
Well, the neighborhood has your back.
You'll be enjoying Christmas
turkey and prawns soon enough.
I really wanted to ask her out.
Andy log.
I'm taking his keys to slow him down.
Is that right?
Hi, I'm unavailable right now.
Leave a message.
Hey um Alondra, look,
I know we haven't spoken
since high school,
but I need you and the kids to
take the Christmas tree down
just for a night.
Look, there's a competition
down in the city for you guys
and if you take the tree
down and send me a photo,
you actually get a thousand dollars
and I know you guys could
really use that money,
so could you just,
just do that and send me a picture please?
Just when you can, okay uh, bye.
What are you trying to sabotage?
You're not from around here, are you?
You were chasing a young girl.
I'm going to expose you.
You think I'm some
creep, some child molester?
I'm none of those things.
I'm just doing what I've been told.
Fair enough, Jim Jones.
Which glue sniffing cult told you that?
Fucking tourist.
You have no idea what is out there.
What the people of the Adelaide
Hills are trying to protect?
They want four sacrifices in
the 12 days before Christmas
and I have five hours left before sunset.
I see all that glue sniffing
has really gone to your head.
I'm not going to kill you
because I'm not a murderer.
Already got a male and an elder.
It only wants two things
now, a female and a child.
You'd make a great
YouTube host, you know?
Ever considered starting your own channel?
You could be famous.
Yeah, I think my ego's fine.
Besides, you only have to fart online
to get famous these days.
Fair enough.
It moved.
It was probably just the wind, come on.
Stop, help!
Can I help you?
They're headed west.
Get in!
Is this your car?
Yes, get in.
What about your boyfriend?
I know.
Andy!
Andy help, we need to go!
Oh my God.
Oh little town of Adelaide
How still we see the lie
Above the deep and dreamless sleep
The silent stars go by
Yet in my dark street, shineth
Is the ever lasting light
The hopes and fears of all the years
Lay in the tonight
Yes, council member.
I can confirm the third kill.
That's lovely, dear.
Boom, huge win!
Like watching the
football's final comeback.
What are you on about?
It found the girl, that's life, sadly.
I was wrong about you.
You're not a child molester,
you're just a sadist.
You still don't get it, do you?
You never will, but what we're doing here
is saving a lot of children, okay?
One child is a small sacrifice
for the bigger picture.
Buddy, you have a psychiatrist
on speed dial, I take it?
I need you
to shut the fuck up.
Are you all right?
I killed her.
I was trying to help her and I killed her.
Come on, it's okay.
I'll get you somewhere safe.
So you backpacking around here?
Yeah.
I've seen the show, I'm a fan.
Whenever Andy eats spicy
food, it cracks me up.
I'm really glad that the community
can convince you to come out here.
Are you a local?
Yeah.
Yeah I am.
What's that for?
Calls it quicker.
Thank you for what you're doing.
What am I doing?
Well, we can't let it get into the city,
so you're saving Christmas.
An hour to go, perfect timing.
Saving Christmas?
Let's get out of here.
I don't want to be around for this.
Where's Andy?
Off making another hit,
viral video I imagine.
Hey, since you don't
have to be sacrificed,
are you doing anything for New Years?
What?
Are you doing anything for New Years?
No, the other bit, sacrifice me.
Get the fuck out of my way, Dane,
or I'll run you over, I swear to God.
Fuck!
Stupid Dane!
Why do you have to go and say that?
Next Christmas, you don't
even mention this stuff.
Fuck!
Andy I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.
There's no time, we have
to get you out of here.
They have marked you.
Your only chance is to get
to the bottom of the hill.
How?
There's a ute parked outside.
Oh, they do move!
Andy, it's a trick.
A trick for what?
Bec run, run Bec, run!
Help me, help me!
Please, let me in, somebody's after me!
Please help me!
What's wrong with this neighborhood!
Did you hear how Feary
got another little tramp
in Adelaide pregnant?
Again?
What a little ho.
Who's that?
Oh, that's just the girl
that we're sacrificing.
Merry Christmas, bitch.
Cheers.
Alert, alert,
all residents please seal
the McHarg Creek road.
Our final subject is on the run
and about to kill Christmas.
Hey sweet cheeks,
you shouldn't be out here all alone.
Five foot seven brunette,
heading towards the Paddocks.
Chase her, you useless bag of bones.
Fuck, I can't chase her.
My face!
Fuck!
How to drive manual.
The first Christmas she ever will know
Won't be about Santa
and reindeer and snow
She'll wonder perhaps
what the fuss is about
A little time left yet,
before she finds out
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
She won't be asking
for presents or toys
She'll just enjoy all
the fun and the noise
Looking at all of the
grownups above her
Happy just knowing that
all of them love her
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
The first Christmas she ever will know
She'll get pretty paper
tied up with a bow
The music will play
and lights will glow
You fat fictional fuck.
On the first Christmas
she ever will know
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Bec, it's me!
Will you please drive?
It's already sunset.
Go, go!
I'm trying.
I'm sorry, all right?
I was never really going to hurt you.
I get that,
but I'm just not sure how to
feel given the circumstances.
Please give me a chance.
I suppose we could try one date.
Really?
Sure.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Dane, Dane please come in.
The girl is heading
your way, please report.
What happens now?
I'm not sure but, we
need to warn people.
What should I say?
Whatever you know.
This is Bec and Andy,
we have an emergency message
for all of the children of
Adelaide this Christmas.
It's come to our attention that
there will be an evil force
descending upon all of those
who have erected a Christmas tree
in their living rooms this holiday season.
Your children are not safe,
you must not let them sleep.
You must take down your trees.
Well, have you been
a good boy this year?
Yes daddy.
That's good to hear.
Will I see you for Christmas this year?
Probably not kid, probably not.
Lock your doors and hub together.
You must sacrifice this
night in order to survive.
Please, we beg you, please
take our word for it.
Please listen to us.
This is not an act right now,
this is us being ourselves
and everyone is in danger.
Please lock your doors
and take down your trees.
That's all we can say.
I should have sacrificed myself,
I should have been the hero.
What's a hero?
Santa?
Oh dear, those poor children.
You know, at least they
can't say we didn't try.
So, I need to clear a few things up
for all of the people
that have the audacity
to leave some hate speech in the comments.
I did not kill your children.
I was actually trying to
send a message to help.
I was trying to do the right thing
and I don't know why everything
keeps getting misinterpreted but,
things have gone pretty down hill for me
ever since this whole thing happened.
I'm getting around 60%
less views and likes,
Bec left me for some guy that
doesn't even have a phone
and who does that?
Making videos was my life.
Please,
like me again.
Like, comment, subscribe and share.
I'm gonna start a whole new channel,
it's the Andy show now, forget about Bec.
Hey.
Walk over, stop, two breaths,
turn around, two breaths.
Yeah, that's it man.
I'm gonna come around on you,
Bec behind, you have to move.
I'm sure you will.
Do better soldier.
Come on, that was terrible.
While I'm filming you, Bella,
tell us how you feel.
It's getting in my hair.
Fuck!
Christmas.
Holy shit.
She be dead.
Oh fuck, she's dead, dead.
Between a rock and a hard place
and I have to do something
before Christmas.
Andy log.
I'm taking his keys to slow him down.
Baby, I love the way you talk
And I love the way
Our own big road trip
and we want you all there
for every big moment.
We couldn't have done it
without our subscribers and sponsors.
This video is actually subscribered by.
Subscribered.
You have spoken to
the police commissioner?
Yes, yes, he's fully aware.
He knows to leave us all alone.
Our mayor buys him off
with whine and cheese.
That's good to hear.
How long until you start?
Only in a few minutes now.
George, where's my cup of tea?
Sorry dear.
You still broadcast by radio?
It's a dying media, I know.
Everyone streams and downloads nowadays.
Do you know my grandson
saw my hand radio last week
and asked, what's that?
I guess anyone random listening in
would bore easily.
I had the
thought recently, you know,
what young people nowadays
find to be the scariest
sound in the whole world?
Silence.
Uh, hello?
Hello council member, hello?
See, unnerving isn't it?
Kids can't handle it.
Everything gets faster,
louder, and flashier.
Silence is so uncomfortable.
You make a good point.
George, my cup of tea.
Yeah, I better
let you get started.
This is your 20th year.
Best of luck, council member.
Counting down, thank you.
George, tea.
I am live in 10,
nine,
eight,
seven,
six,
five,
four,
three.
Community
broadcast is commencing.
Community broadcast is commencing.
Good evening, Hills residents.
Thank you for joining in.
Tonight, we are going to
do the candidate lottery.
First candidate, it is
green ball number 13.
Red ball number 11.
Silver ball number 19.
Shit.
And now, Hills residents,
we come to the lottery
for the second candidate.
First ball is silver ball number seven.
Second ball is green ball number five.
Third ball is red ball number 14.
Thank God, thank God.
This is Andy's first
time trying a bubble tea.
Now, I'm just
reminding the Hills residents,
there have two more lotteries to come.
I'm gonna go over those numbers again.
It's a silver number seven,
it's a green number five
and it's a red number 14.
Remember, there are 12
days to go till Christmas.
I do wish you all the very best of luck.
Go on Hannah, stand next to it.
I really don't want to.
Why not?
It's weird.
It's Santa Claus.
It's not Santa Claus,
it looks like crap.
Just let me film you with it,
it'll make a great video
to send to grandma.
That's great, smile Hannah,
say Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas.
Aw come on, get down closer to it.
I'll get a shot of him
with his arm around you.
No, you.
It's not going to bite,
it'll take two seconds.
Merry Christmas.
Look at the camera.
My makeup looks so bad.
Really?
I think this looks amazing.
What, my makeup?
No, our faces!
Okay.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy back,
rocking the world again.
We have come out today
and Andy has let me be in
charge of what we're eating,
so I have just a normal chicken burger
and Andy has the spiciest
burger on the menu.
What's up YouTube?
We are back again.
We've just done a full
day worth of shopping.
My feet are killing me.
As you can see, Andy is blindfolded today
and that is because I finally received
something I've been
waiting for so long to get.
It's spicy?
I love animals
and I'm so excited to
pet the little kangaroos
and the little wallabies.
This is amazing, I can't
believe he's so chill.
Oh my God.
What do you think it is?
That's clothing.
Yeah, but what do you think is on it?
You didn't.
Oh, no way!
Yeah, we got the shirt.
Okay, so we've just hit
two million subscribers
and Bec doesn't know
this, but to celebrate,
I'm actually going to propose.
You could all like and subscribe.
And then like and subscribe.
To like and subscribe
and rate and ring the
bell for notifications.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy here, rocking
the world once again.
Too right,
we're stoked about the amount of views
in our last big post.
Keep it up, peeps, huge love to you all.
We are back, bigger and better than ever
and this Christmas season,
we're taking a trip around our home state.
Staying at home sucks,
so this Christmas,
we're spreading our wings
with a the real big road trip.
We want you all there for very big moment.
We could not have done it
without our subscribers and sponsors
and this video is actually
sponsored by Cover U.
It is the greatest new app
that provides you with online protection
and extra phone coverage in
dark and dangerous places.
Cover U is the only way
to let your friends know
that it's actually you and
not your dangle ganger.
Doppelganger.
What?
It's doppelganger,
you said dangle ganger.
No I said, no, that's what I said.
No you didn't, let's do it again.
No, just leave it alone,
I said the right thing, Bec.
The sponsors will cut ties
if we don't get this accurate.
Why don't we just keep it in
and I'll edit you correcting
me out, it'll be fine.
I told you, the marketing person
said we have to be
accurate with their script
when mentioning their product.
Let's just do it again,
stop being stubborn.
This is such bullshit.
I hate this stuff, the
app doesn't even work.
I don't care, Andy,
do you want to keep
doing this stuff or not?
We get a new sponsor every two months,
so let's just screw this
up and we'll get a new one.
I'm not building a bad
reputation with this guy, Andy.
Stop being so stubborn,
let's just do it again.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy here, rocking the world.
Seriously?
You're going to be a
dick, that's the plan?
I'm trying to be funny.
I can't do this right now.
What are you doing?
You're driving me
nuts, I need some space.
Women.
How sick would it be
if I caught a car accident,
or like someone breaking
a law or something?
Why is that sick?
Have you not seen how many hits
accidents and road rage videos get?
Plus like, it would get
us some new exposure.
Yeah, people
make mistakes too, Andy.
Are you really going to
punish them for that?
Dude, we just capture it.
The general public can
decide who is the idiot.
Why isn't there
any money in my account?
Andy, where's my money?
Wait, what are these transactions?
Audio equipment, competitive
edge gaming chairs?
Did you spend all my money on shit?
It's popular set designing.
If we don't have it,
we'll just look like losers online.
Who says that?
The people remember.
If it trends, we have to have it.
I'll tell you what
I'd like, money in my account.
We have bills, Andy,
rent, electricity, phone bills,
and let's not forget, we eat
out almost every second night.
This stuff exists.
Oh man, I'm so glad we're camping out.
All right.
Day one, Christmas vacation,
hot Australian summer,
classic bushfire territory,
danger lurks all around, snakes, spiders.
Are you gonna help me?
You feeling scared, Bec?
Not at all.
I know we're covered with our Cover U app,
I don't leave home without it.
Perfect.
It's going to be an amazing adventure.
I can't wait to see what we find.
Now seriously, Andy, help me.
This is such a beautiful place.
I wish all our fans were here with us.
Don't forget to lock the car.
Hey, did you get the GoPro?
It's on your head.
Our last video has a decreased
viewership of 54 thousand.
We're slipping and we need
to do something bolder.
Even our subscriber rate has halted.
Well, what do you suggest then?
Oh, I don't know, this?
This is not what people want to see.
Unless you can find a
waterfall to jump off naked,
or get lost in a storm on an unused path,
or something exciting.
You know,
not every video we do has
to have a hook or a gimmick.
You're the one with the business agenda.
You can't see this being a problem.
Wait, did you hear that?
Hear what?
Exactly, nothing.
I don't want to talk about
statistics or subscribers
or business tactics right now.
What do you wanna talk about?
Nothing.
I just want to enjoy the silence for once.
This is meant to be a holiday.
People want to see our holiday.
Andy, just one hour, okay?
One hour to what?
Just shut the fuck up.
Hard week, Feary?
You can say that.
What's this?
Girl you're looking for?
I suspect by now, she's out
near Darlington's place.
You have everything set here?
Three sheep, they're waiting.
Good.
Remember, you call the
council every time one falls.
Hey, do I look like an idiot, pal?
I know what I'm doing here.
Feary?
Yeah.
Cut back on the drink, would you?
You wanna change positions?
Look, I got a kid in town, all right?
Broken marriage.
I haven't seen him two years.
I'm sorry for you.
I'm heading down there
and see him in the morning.
I'm sure you will.
I love these undisturbed places.
You know, when I can't sleep at night,
this is what I picture.
You can talk now, doofus.
If we make enough money,
we can buy a place out here.
I think we'd need a much
larger viewership for that
and maybe an e-sports contract
and let's face it, you know,
neither of us are very good
at finger slapping a joystick.
Well, it is Christmas.
Tis the season to wish.
Wish?
People wish everyday, Christmas
just puts a ribbon on it.
You know, maybe we shouldn't spoil this.
The more people that move out here,
the more litter we'll find, so, come on.
What on earth is that?
Looks like some kind of scarecrow Santa.
Oh look, there's another one.
Oh God, something died in this one.
What's up guys and girls?
Check this out.
I'm here in Adelaide
Hills with my girl, Bec,
and we have come across
the strangest site,
a golf playing, scarecrow Santa
and this one over here is
playing hide and seek with Bec.
These are so weird, like
what a weird thing to set up?
Hey, pass me your phone for a second.
Thanks.
They look like chicken
wire and paper-mache to me,
but this is one cool dude Santa.
Apparently, the locals
of the Adelaide Hills
have placed out Santa's
scarecrows for decades
every December as a
sign of mischief and fun
for the festive season.
So people with way too
much time on their hands,
in other words.
I've got an idea, put your sunny's on.
I'm gonna get a mischief fun photo
with me and my main man.
This is cool.
This is a sweet tunnel.
I hope there's
not a homeless family
living in there.
No, but I think one of
those Santa statute things
is down there.
Oh fuck off, that is creepy.
Mischief, right?
You have to go first.
No way in hell, Andy, you go first.
Just go.
Look at all this graffiti.
Oh my goodness.
This could have been an old
bomb shelter or something.
Doubt it.
Well you never know, it could've been.
What do you know about bomb shelters?
Oh god, this is scary.
It smells like piss in
here Andy, lets keep moving.
Hello there, my friend.
All I want for Christmas
is for you not to kill me.
Keep going.
What, are you getting
scared, are you, Bec?
A little claustrophobic, yeah.
Claustrophobic, arachnophobic,
what aren't you fucking phobic of?
Seriously, is this
Christmas or Halloween?
I don't want us camping
anywhere near those things.
Oh, nice little log.
Hey Andy, did you bring the gas stove?
What?
The gas stove that I asked
you to get two days ago?
No, what for?
Uh, to cook our food, dumb ass.
What do you mean?
Isn't that your job?
Excuse me?
You can do this then.
What do I do with this?
Assemble it.
How to assemble tent.
Are you in a bar?
Since when did you start drinking?
Since last week.
Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm just looking for someone.
Oh, like a guy!
Good for you, about time.
What kinda guy are you looking for?
Like an older guy.
Yeah, they're more mature.
So what like, five, ten years?
No, more like 50.
You want a man who's about to drop dead?
More or less.
Do you want to marry him,
like, is everything okay?
No, no, look, I don't
think you'd understand
even if I tried to explain.
My grandfather is on life support.
Seriously?
No, stop.
I'm just trapped between
a rock and a hard place
and there's something that I
need to do before Christmas.
I just need a new tactic.
Wait, what's that?
Great, now there's ads on video call.
What ya doing?
Meditating.
I can do that.
What's this meant to do?
I'm practicing mindfulness,
so just focus on your breathing.
Fuck this shit.
Hard day at work, hon?
How was your day?
Is there anything else I can get for you?
Here you go.
Andy, are you fucking serious?
Is that creek water?
That's fucking disgusting.
What?
It's for the fans, it'll be funny.
Fuck the fans.
Andy, I cannot eat this cold.
Do we have anything else?
Can you put that away for one night?
Sorry, what?
I said, can you
put the laptop away?
Can you give me like 45 minutes.
Just checking our socials &
sending out Christmas greetings.
I can't believe how many channels
are giving away free gifts
and money for Christmas.
We should look at doing that next year.
What are you doing?
I'm right here, Andy.
Yeah, I can see that.
No, you don't.
I'm tired of this, I'm
so sick of the world
watching every little thing I do,
but where are you, Andy?
Is this our life?
Every week, another fucking subscriber,
another video and another
bell button to click.
I thought you loved all this.
I thought I did too,
but I was sold on an image.
I was just following the herd.
I thought it was normal, but
this feels like insanity.
I feel like I'm stuck in a machine.
Ugh.
I had so much porn saved on there.
Dear God, can you hear me?
Yes Hannah.
Please help me get out of here alive.
Don't count on it, Hannah.
But why?
It's Christmas time.
People die everyday, Hannah.
People die every day.
Ew.
Baby, I love the way you talk
The way you move and
the way you squawk
I'd like to keep you by my side
What are you doing?
I'm serenading you.
Andy?
Yes?
Singing is not your best attribute.
I see.
But thanks for trying.
Andy, did you make coffee?
Oh wait, I forgot.
We can't because he didn't
bring the gas stove.
Andy?
Andy?
Andy?
Hello?
Andy?
Andy?
This place really needs a new definition,
of fun and mischief.
Hey.
Did you make coffee?
Um, I'm seeing things.
Where have you been?
Giving you that extra peace.
Baden.
Dane.
Why are you spoiling my view?
Just returning from Kangarella,
looking for a young girl, about 12.
Blonde hair.
Still, have you tried McHarg Creek?
I was on my way there now.
It's almost midday.
The community is all secure?
I believe so.
I've been doing the rounds all week.
Sunset is estimated for half past eight.
How many?
Only one.
One?
Jesus.
Who was assigned this year?
Karla, Feary, and Mrs. Rosemont.
Mrs. Rosemont is 85 years old.
Where's Karla?
She's been doing roadside.
Feary snagged the male three days back
and is with the sacrificial mutton.
I've taken over for Mrs. Rosemont.
You are pushing everyone's luck.
It's not easy to keep a secret.
You better stop talking
to me and get back to it.
I'll let the neighbors know.
Right.
Are you okay, dear?
Not really.
I could get some help but,
something's happened with my engine.
I could call you a tow truck.
No, no, uh, I just need you to help me.
I'm not a grease monkey.
Please, I'm more than
happy to reward you.
Oh, I could call you a uh.
No, uh, no, don't worry, just.
This is taking way too long.
Hey pretty lady.
Need a hand?
Fuck off.
Just do it.
What's up YouTube?
Bec and Andy here again.
Had a pretty hot night last night,
but I guess that's Christmas
in Australia for you.
I haven't slept in a tent since I was 14.
It wasn't too bad,
except for Andy farting the whole night
and turning it into a massive Dutch oven.
Hey, you know uncooked
beans will do that.
We are off to our next sweet spot
along the Heysen trail now.
It is just amazing to spend
Christmas Eve in the woods.
Let's do this.
Hello?
This is Rosemont speaking.
I've just noticed a young female
hitchhiking towards the Heysen trail.
This looks strange.
Ho, ho, ho.
On Christmas Eve, his face will show.
Protect the hills and he will go.
Four sacrifices will be made
from lamb and man until sun fades.
I don't get any of this.
Is this some kind of religious thing?
Seems a little removed for that.
Excuse me, excuse me.
Can you help me?
Hey, whoa, you all right, kid?
Are you locals?
No.
No, no, we're just camping out.
We're Bec and Andy, you
might've seen us online.
Oh yeah, I've seen some of your videos.
Good to meet a fan in
the middle of a dirt road.
I never said I was a fan.
Are you all right?
I need to go to the
city, a man's after me.
A man?
Did you do something wrong?
We should probably call the police.
Yeah.
No wait, we need to record this.
Not right now.
Yes now, remember our sponsor, Cover U?
What a plug?
One way to use the app and save the day.
This could be serious.
Yes, you're always talking
about keeping sponsors.
We do this,
they'll fund our videos
for the next 12 months,
not to mention, we'll be heroes.
Lost little girl in the
woods on Christmas Eve.
Sweetie, would you mind if we just
recorded us helping you?
Really?
Fine.
So, we've been walking around this road
for the last half an hour
and this poor little girl
has stumbled across us, lost.
I'm not lost.
Are you okay, what is your name?
Hannah.
And how old are you, Hannah?
Okay.
I'm going to use our Cover U app
to get Hannah some help and
get out location accurate.
Shit.
Okay wait.
Application error.
This app needs
to be restarted, hang on.
What do you mean?
Hey, we need to film this again.
Now my whole phone is spazzing out.
I told you this app doesn't even work.
Hannah wait, we're sorry.
It's okay.
I'll find some real adults to help me.
We're adults.
Barely.
Well come with us at least,
you shouldn't be out here alone.
I think I stand a
better chance on my own.
Well, where are you going?
To the bus stop, maybe
someone can help me there.
What about your parents?
Dead.
My parents are dead, all right?
Thanks for finally asking.
I told you guys, leave me alone.
We will, when we get you some help.
Are you going to try this house?
Don't trust the locals around here.
Another one of these cheap things.
They move.
Huh?
What did you just say?
I've seen them move.
You know what?
I'm sick of these things.
They're just straw and duct tape.
Filled with coal of all things.
Isn't that what Santa
gives to naughty children?
He's not real, the parents do it.
It's just a big mix up between
mythology and marketing
to make money.
Okay.
Smart kid.
40 years ago, this
thing didn't even exist,
so what happened?
I'll tell you what happened.
We grew out of excess waste
and everyone wanting a
slice of the good life.
I know you're frustrated,
but there's nothing we can do now.
Exactly.
Now, we are stuck with what we
created and who pays for it?
Children.
Baden, it's
Christmas, just be happy.
Yes, I'd hate to be the one
to spoil the day of cheer and joy,
I guess, I did become a
grumpy old scrooge, after all.
Listen.
Oh shit.
Shit.
I'm putting him back together.
I'm safe, I'm safe.
I'm safe.
I'm safe, I've put him back together.
I'm safe.
I'm safe, I'm safe.
Still three, that
doesn't make much sense.
Okay, so our car is about
an hour over that hill.
I'll get my phone, call for
help and get us out of here.
Someone's coming.
Hannah, wait.
That's the guy.
That guy?
Sleazebag scum!
What are you doing?
ID for the authorities.
Damn.
All right, you two go back to
the car, I'll meet you there.
Wait Andy,
our priority is to get
this girl to safety,
not by vigilante.
I can take that guy.
I film him, justice will be served.
Andy stop filming, don't be a hero!
Get back to the car,
I'll meet you there!
What do you think?
My dad says, if you
have nothing nice to say,
don't say anything at all.
What are you doing here?
Wind's blowing east.
It means an elder fell.
My job is done and if
you don't believe me,
you can ask the Henderson's
or Mrs. Rosemont.
But who?
Well, how am I to know?
Look, I am going home
and I'm not getting my hands dirty.
In fact, I'm moving states.
Fuck whatever you people unleashed.
Karla, there is still two more.
Well, you have a six and a half hours.
I'm sure you can deal with it.
Merry Christmas.
Andy log.
It's Christmas Eve.
My phone has mysteriously... broken.
I've located the property
of the pedophile chasing
after young Hannah.
I'm going down there.
It's my civil duty.
Wish me luck.
Well, if she won't cooperate,
we're just going to have to sacrifice her.
There must be something else we can do.
We don't have time, dear.
All right, all right, I'll get it done.
Well, the neighborhood has your back.
You'll be enjoying Christmas
turkey and prawns soon enough.
I really wanted to ask her out.
Andy log.
I'm taking his keys to slow him down.
Is that right?
Hi, I'm unavailable right now.
Leave a message.
Hey um Alondra, look,
I know we haven't spoken
since high school,
but I need you and the kids to
take the Christmas tree down
just for a night.
Look, there's a competition
down in the city for you guys
and if you take the tree
down and send me a photo,
you actually get a thousand dollars
and I know you guys could
really use that money,
so could you just,
just do that and send me a picture please?
Just when you can, okay uh, bye.
What are you trying to sabotage?
You're not from around here, are you?
You were chasing a young girl.
I'm going to expose you.
You think I'm some
creep, some child molester?
I'm none of those things.
I'm just doing what I've been told.
Fair enough, Jim Jones.
Which glue sniffing cult told you that?
Fucking tourist.
You have no idea what is out there.
What the people of the Adelaide
Hills are trying to protect?
They want four sacrifices in
the 12 days before Christmas
and I have five hours left before sunset.
I see all that glue sniffing
has really gone to your head.
I'm not going to kill you
because I'm not a murderer.
Already got a male and an elder.
It only wants two things
now, a female and a child.
You'd make a great
YouTube host, you know?
Ever considered starting your own channel?
You could be famous.
Yeah, I think my ego's fine.
Besides, you only have to fart online
to get famous these days.
Fair enough.
It moved.
It was probably just the wind, come on.
Stop, help!
Can I help you?
They're headed west.
Get in!
Is this your car?
Yes, get in.
What about your boyfriend?
I know.
Andy!
Andy help, we need to go!
Oh my God.
Oh little town of Adelaide
How still we see the lie
Above the deep and dreamless sleep
The silent stars go by
Yet in my dark street, shineth
Is the ever lasting light
The hopes and fears of all the years
Lay in the tonight
Yes, council member.
I can confirm the third kill.
That's lovely, dear.
Boom, huge win!
Like watching the
football's final comeback.
What are you on about?
It found the girl, that's life, sadly.
I was wrong about you.
You're not a child molester,
you're just a sadist.
You still don't get it, do you?
You never will, but what we're doing here
is saving a lot of children, okay?
One child is a small sacrifice
for the bigger picture.
Buddy, you have a psychiatrist
on speed dial, I take it?
I need you
to shut the fuck up.
Are you all right?
I killed her.
I was trying to help her and I killed her.
Come on, it's okay.
I'll get you somewhere safe.
So you backpacking around here?
Yeah.
I've seen the show, I'm a fan.
Whenever Andy eats spicy
food, it cracks me up.
I'm really glad that the community
can convince you to come out here.
Are you a local?
Yeah.
Yeah I am.
What's that for?
Calls it quicker.
Thank you for what you're doing.
What am I doing?
Well, we can't let it get into the city,
so you're saving Christmas.
An hour to go, perfect timing.
Saving Christmas?
Let's get out of here.
I don't want to be around for this.
Where's Andy?
Off making another hit,
viral video I imagine.
Hey, since you don't
have to be sacrificed,
are you doing anything for New Years?
What?
Are you doing anything for New Years?
No, the other bit, sacrifice me.
Get the fuck out of my way, Dane,
or I'll run you over, I swear to God.
Fuck!
Stupid Dane!
Why do you have to go and say that?
Next Christmas, you don't
even mention this stuff.
Fuck!
Andy I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.
There's no time, we have
to get you out of here.
They have marked you.
Your only chance is to get
to the bottom of the hill.
How?
There's a ute parked outside.
Oh, they do move!
Andy, it's a trick.
A trick for what?
Bec run, run Bec, run!
Help me, help me!
Please, let me in, somebody's after me!
Please help me!
What's wrong with this neighborhood!
Did you hear how Feary
got another little tramp
in Adelaide pregnant?
Again?
What a little ho.
Who's that?
Oh, that's just the girl
that we're sacrificing.
Merry Christmas, bitch.
Cheers.
Alert, alert,
all residents please seal
the McHarg Creek road.
Our final subject is on the run
and about to kill Christmas.
Hey sweet cheeks,
you shouldn't be out here all alone.
Five foot seven brunette,
heading towards the Paddocks.
Chase her, you useless bag of bones.
Fuck, I can't chase her.
My face!
Fuck!
How to drive manual.
The first Christmas she ever will know
Won't be about Santa
and reindeer and snow
She'll wonder perhaps
what the fuss is about
A little time left yet,
before she finds out
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
She won't be asking
for presents or toys
She'll just enjoy all
the fun and the noise
Looking at all of the
grownups above her
Happy just knowing that
all of them love her
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
The first Christmas she ever will know
She'll get pretty paper
tied up with a bow
The music will play
and lights will glow
You fat fictional fuck.
On the first Christmas
she ever will know
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Bec, it's me!
Will you please drive?
It's already sunset.
Go, go!
I'm trying.
I'm sorry, all right?
I was never really going to hurt you.
I get that,
but I'm just not sure how to
feel given the circumstances.
Please give me a chance.
I suppose we could try one date.
Really?
Sure.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Dane, Dane please come in.
The girl is heading
your way, please report.
What happens now?
I'm not sure but, we
need to warn people.
What should I say?
Whatever you know.
This is Bec and Andy,
we have an emergency message
for all of the children of
Adelaide this Christmas.
It's come to our attention that
there will be an evil force
descending upon all of those
who have erected a Christmas tree
in their living rooms this holiday season.
Your children are not safe,
you must not let them sleep.
You must take down your trees.
Well, have you been
a good boy this year?
Yes daddy.
That's good to hear.
Will I see you for Christmas this year?
Probably not kid, probably not.
Lock your doors and hub together.
You must sacrifice this
night in order to survive.
Please, we beg you, please
take our word for it.
Please listen to us.
This is not an act right now,
this is us being ourselves
and everyone is in danger.
Please lock your doors
and take down your trees.
That's all we can say.
I should have sacrificed myself,
I should have been the hero.
What's a hero?
Santa?
Oh dear, those poor children.
You know, at least they
can't say we didn't try.
So, I need to clear a few things up
for all of the people
that have the audacity
to leave some hate speech in the comments.
I did not kill your children.
I was actually trying to
send a message to help.
I was trying to do the right thing
and I don't know why everything
keeps getting misinterpreted but,
things have gone pretty down hill for me
ever since this whole thing happened.
I'm getting around 60%
less views and likes,
Bec left me for some guy that
doesn't even have a phone
and who does that?
Making videos was my life.
Please,
like me again.
Like, comment, subscribe and share.
I'm gonna start a whole new channel,
it's the Andy show now, forget about Bec.
Hey.
Walk over, stop, two breaths,
turn around, two breaths.
Yeah, that's it man.
I'm gonna come around on you,
Bec behind, you have to move.
I'm sure you will.
Do better soldier.
Come on, that was terrible.
While I'm filming you, Bella,
tell us how you feel.
It's getting in my hair.
Fuck!
Christmas.
Holy shit.
She be dead.
Oh fuck, she's dead, dead.
Between a rock and a hard place
and I have to do something
before Christmas.
Andy log.
I'm taking his keys to slow him down.
Baby, I love the way you talk
And I love the way
Our own big road trip
and we want you all there
for every big moment.
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without our subscribers and sponsors.
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