Tankhouse (2022) Movie Script
1
Ah, look at us.
My beloved and me bound together
by art and love.
Ready to take on the world.
How could we have known that our
quest
for redemption would tear us
asunder?
Oh, but I'm getting ahead of
myself.
Long before Fargo I was just
Tucker Charlemagne,
a newly minted bachelor of fine
arts in New York City.
But what set me apart from my
fellow bearded
caucasian alums was my
partnership with Sandrene.
I'll never forget the moment we
first locked eyes.
I was directing a movement piece
when suddenly
a shock of hay blonde hair
commanded my attention.
Sandrene Rothstein from far off
North Dakota with dreams of TV
stardom.
She was doing research for a
role
in a new detective show, "Rookie
Badge."
From there began a romance
punctuated by a whirlwind
of Shakespearian performances
throughout the boroughs.
But when Rookie Badge finally
aired they had
brutally cut out nearly her
entire part.
Sandrene was devastated.
So I invited her to join me at
the Artist Atelier Acting Studio
under
legendary acting teacher Buford
Schlesinger.
I have only two notes.
One, a working actress must
always carry a fan.
And two, if you wanna make it in
this business
you've got to immediately lose
10 pounds.
Buford forged us in the flames
of the avant-garde.
Sadly, a chronic battle with
gout left him
wheelchair bound and he
nominated
Sandrene and me as his
successors, instructing us
to devise our premiere
performance.
I can see it now.
3 AM atop a derelict warehouse
in The Bronx.
We had a packed house plus a
comped ticket
for Jax Winn, lead theater
critic
of the Black Box Chronicle.
Let's knock them dead.
Yeah.
David!
The stage was set for us
to unveil our signature
innovation.
The Immersive Theater Attack.
A thrusting of the audience into
the performance
with the power to jolt
theatergoers
out of their comfort zone.
Immersive Theater Attack!
How slow this old moon wanes...
Four nights will quickly
dream away the time,
And then the moon shall behold
the night of our solemnities.
For a moment it seemed as though
Sandrene and I were on the edge
of a new dawn.
Awake the nimble spirit of
mirth!
Turn melancholy forth to
funerals!
But as quickly as it began,
so did it abruptly end.
Oh.
Nana?
My god.
I can still hear Jax
Winn's damning words.
Don't write that down.
"The tragic death of theater
patron"
"Doris Feinstein overshadowed"
"an otherwise scattershot
production."
Scattershot?
"From The Confidential
Collective."
It's not my fault that Jax
Winn can't see
that such a "tragedy" is
precisely what
an immersive theater attack is
all about.
You monster!
What Tucker is trying to say
is that
we are so, so sorry for your
loss.
And we promise that such a
tragedy will never happen again.
Yes, it was a once in a
lifetime anomaly.
Oh really?
From our very first workshop
where
you forced us to use real guns!
To adding unstimulated sexual
intercourse with each other.
To last night, when Asher's
Nana, and by the way,
our only source of funding,
died.
After she lived as she never
had before!
I have here an official
petition,
from the members of the
"Artist's Atelier"
"Presents The Confidential
Collective,"
demanding that Tucker and
Sandrene step down.
Judas!
Buford, surely you must
appreciate
the divine influences at work
here.
Our production's birth.
Nana's death.
It's the circle of life.
Don't patronize me, young man.
I must respect the will of The
Collective.
You two are hereby banned from
all outreach activities.
Not the Artist's Atelier
Prison Unit.
Without a working knowledge of
iambic pentameter
they'll never be able to reenter
society!
Due to your extreme
recklessness,
I have no choice but to award
leadership
of The Collective into the hands
of David.
- No!
- No!
Squire, please escort these two
out of the rehearsal studio.
Cowards!
Conformists!
Darling, let's just go.
No no, we will remount our
rooftop spectacular
and it will shake this town to
its very core!
Okay Tucker, they're in the
elevator, so please be nice.
If we want to remount the show
we need their money.
Well how am I supposed to
impress them when
the injera hasn't even had a
chance to leaven?
Nobody forced you to make an
Ethiopian feast from scratch.
Well why don't we just open
up a couple cans
of baked beans and throw them
into
a Home Depot bucket and call it
a day?
Bob: We're here!
Where's our little celeb?
Mom!
Hi sweetie.
Daddy.
There's our girl.
Hey hey hey!
Look at your hair.
Is it yours?
Mom.
There's the big boy!
Tucker, hi!
Hey, hello.
Bob: Tuck!
I love your costume.
Oh actually it is a
traditional robe
pilfered from the tomb of one of
the last
known relatives of Alexander
the... Good.
Okay.
Well here.
I brought you this fresh sack of
homemade bison jerky.
Oh, you shouldn't have.
Bison.
Go on.
Tuck, take a pull.
Daddy, we're vegans now.
Remember that documentary I sent
you?
Yeah, well it's not meat,
it's jerky.
Go on, take a bite.
You know what?
I am going to save this and dive
into it later.
I'll be offended if you don't
try it.
Well I'd hate to offend you.
I shall
"Take a pull" as you say.
You're so bad.
There you go!
Put some hair on your chest.
You're getting that nice smokey
mesquite!
I can taste it in the...
In the...
The tendons.
What time's the performance?
Oh yeah, what did you guys
transform into theater this
time?
Is it another public restroom in
Prospect Park?
Because we came prepared.
Well about that.
The production is...
Being retooled.
Oh geez, how come?
We decided to leave our
theater company.
So there's no show?
Well we are gonna remount the
rooftop show on our own.
But you know, first we're gonna
need
some additional funding before
we can do...
Ha!
I told you!
You did, Bob, you did.
That they couldn't make it
through to dessert.
Daddy please, we've been
working on this for four years.
It'll literally make our
reputation in New York.
We wouldn't ask for anything
ever again.
Ever again.
That's good.
You really are your mother's
daughter.
Sandy, your mother and I have
been talking
and we think it's high time you
two start
pulling yourselves up by your
own bootstraps.
We are artists, Bob.
Not plumbers.
Well we have been bankrolling
this whole
artist lifestyle for long
enough.
So it is time to grow up and
start earning a living.
Because we cannot justify this
freeloading here any longer.
Got it?
Let's go.
We'll see if we can find one of
those halal carts.
So what, you're just cutting
us off?
That bison jerky's my last
handout.
You hear?
Wait, no, mommy please!
Mommy.
You know I don't have the
forearm
strength to be a waitress.
Well there is one thing, but...
No, anything mommy, please.
You know the Fargo City Council
is revitalizing Main Street.
Yeah.
Well they've renovated the
Fargo Theater.
And they're having a competition
next month
to award a residency to one
local theater company.
Oh Tucker, you should see the
Fargo Theater.
It's so beautiful.
Yes.
Oh yes, wonderful.
We can perform for the spillover
from the local cattle auction.
Come to Fargo.
And try and win the theater.
Sweetie, I think you have a
shot.
And you can stay at the ranch
while we're on safari in
Tanzania.
Otherwise, your father's right.
You can't live in fantasy land
anymore.
Conductor: Stand clear of the
closing doors please.
Tucker?
Come have a word with me at the
Atelier.
Have I told you about my
off-off-Broadway
production of A Doll's House
Which Walter Kerr called
"a neorealist's wet dream?"
Wet dream, yeah.
I wish I had been alive to see
it.
I would've sat in the splash
zone.
The first adaptation of that
was devised in the jungles of
Siberia.
I didn't know that they had
jungles in the Arctic.
The snow.
The mosquitoes!
Collaborating with comrades
toward a single goal.
It made me the artist I am
today.
If you're ever going to discover
the true purpose of theater
Yes.
You must have this experience
too.
But the New York theater is
my home.
But you'll never understand
it until you step away
to discover the true purpose of
that theater.
I see.
It's all clear to me now.
It's all for your own good,
my boy.
The gout has eaten its way
from your foot
to your brain and infected it.
That's medically impossible.
King Lear would be proud.
Tucker, you must realize.
You're standing in your own way.
Do you see this?
It's literally real fake fur.
I'm sure you can get tons for
it.
Also this one.
Oh my god.
Sandy.
Brian.
Is that you?
Brian!
Hey.
So how are you?
How's it going?
Who are you with?
Oh.
Tucker.
No no no no, who are you repped
by?
Oh.
Oh no no, I don't have an agent.
Really?
You didn't get signed after your
Rookie Badge recurring?
Oh no, we took over the
theater company
right after that, so we've been
really busy.
So I just got promoted to
coordinator
at United Talent International.
UTI, right.
I'm starting to hip pocket my
own clients
and I would love to send you out
on some stuff.
See if anything sticks.
Really?
Sandrene, you are way too legit
to spend your life pawning
pashminas.
You'll never perform in
this city again!
Hello?
Hello?
Did you find us a theater?
No.
Everyone in this town thinks
we're murderers.
Or, as your father's lawyer
says,
"involuntary manslaughterers."
Great.
There's gotta be a way.
What are we missing?
Sandrene.
Brilliant!
Brilliant!
What?
This face mask has particles
of 24 karat gold in it.
If we chemically separate it and
melt it down
into bullion, I've heard tell of
a man
in Venezuela who will pay top
dollar for...
Tucker!
What?
Look at us!
Is this what our life is gonna
be like?
What choice do we have?
We can't get real jobs.
- Of course.
- Of course.
We can go to Fargo.
Sandrene, please be serious.
I am.
The competition, the Fargo
Theater.
This could be our chance to do
what we've always dreamed.
No, I will not cast my theatrical
pearls before... bison.
You're missing the forest for
the trees.
We wouldn't have to worry about
money.
We'd live at my parents' ranch
and we'd
have the freedom to make
whatever we want.
Like a retreat.
A retreat.
Like the jungles of Siberia...
There are no jungles in Siberia.
But nobody in Fargo would
have experience.
We'd have to start from scratch.
Exactly!
We'd have a blank canvas to
create whatever we want.
Also rent's due tomorrow, so
unless
your gold extractor's up and
running
we best start looking for a
tent.
Oh.
Ahh, the city gates.
At least we've arrived.
Yeah, but my parents' ranch
is still two miles down that
way.
Let's go.
We should've just stayed in
the car.
Ahh, there she blows.
Mmm yes, the historic
Fargo Theater.
We would be its ideal
custodians.
Come with me.
This could be our Globe.
Though, you know,
Hopefully less flammable.
I used to sneak in here.
Pretend I was on Broadway.
Never actually got to perform
here though.
But soft, what light through
yonder window breaks?
It is the east.
And Juliet is the sun.
Oh Romeo, Romeo.
Wherefore art thou Romeo?
Deny thy father and refuse thy
name.
Or if thou wilt not, be but
sworn
my love and I will no longer
be...
Morten: Rothstein?
Mr. Mortenson?
Sandy Rothstein, live and in
person?
Treading the boards?
Oh fer cute, Sandy Rothstein.
How long has it been since our
legendary drama class?
You look wonderful!
So do you.
Thank you.
And actually I go by my stage
name St. Jean now.
Sandy St. Jean, I like that.
Sandrene.
Sandrene St. John, even
better.
Well you came up with it.
Well let's applaud me!
Excuse me good sir, but we were
in the throes of artistic
creation.
- No no no, Tucker, this is Mr.
- Mortenson.
My high school drama teacher.
He's the one that taught me how
to sing
and dance and get rid of my
accent
so I could make it in New York.
It's true.
And you are?
Tucker Charlemagne, if you
please.
Tucker's my fiance.
Oh.
Cute.
So what are you doing home, huh?
Visiting the folks?
No, we are here to start an
artistic
revolution and claim this
theater.
I see.
Oh, maybe you can help us
actually.
We need to cast our ensemble and
Mr. Mortenson
knows all the best actors in
town.
It's true, I do.
But I'm afraid they're not
available.
Why not?
Because they're in my ensemble.
Ensemble!
Get out here, kids.
There you are.
Your body is your instrument.
You're a symphony, all of you.
Okay, no tension.
There you go, that's beautiful.
You see, a lot has changed since
you left, Sandy.
West Fargo High has cut the
drama department.
What?
Why?
They used the money to buy
an ice bath for the football
team.
So I had to go out on my own,
build my own
repertory company to perform all
the classics like we used to do.
And yes, there is a competition
for the theater, but it's
perfunctory.
The Red River Players are poised
to win.
We could use an immense talent
like yours.
Sandrene would never betray me.
Tucker, please.
There's a dearth of local
talent here.
A lot of people auditioned.
If you want to see the rejects,
they're all
performing open mic night down
at the Sons of Norway.
Sandy.
You.
And so friend becomes foe.
Come on, I need to get a drink.
Norway.
Ibsen, very good.
Good.
Well if only we were looking
for farmhands and cowpokes.
Don't fret, darling.
I'm gonna ask around.
We will find our band of merry
minstrels or my name isn't...
Sandy?
Oh my god, Hank!
Look at you, Miss Thing.
How long has it been, seven
years?
Yeah, since that summer after
graduation.
Sure has.
How now?
Tucker, this is Hank.
Hank, this is Tucker.
Her partner.
Creatively, spiritually,
and soon to be... matrimonially.
And you told me you weren't
the marrying kind.
Yeah, well a lot has changed
since high school.
And yet here you are.
Yes!
Tough crowd tonight, man.
Aw please, your music's just
lost on these fossils!
Oi Hank, you're up.
All right.
Who is that hayseed?
No, that "hayseed" is my
boyfriend
from high school, remember?
I told you about him many times.
He still seems very enamord.
Tuck, please.
He never left Fargo.
You know how that bothers me.
You don't seem botherd.
Before our next act, I'm obliged
to remind you all that the Red
River Players
will be presenting a medley from
their
production of Pirates of
Penzance
at the Fargo Theater competition
this month.
Whoop de doo.
Also, if you don't want to be a
part
of that musical theater drivel.
Dryvel?
Dribble?
Drivel, you were right the
first time.
Drivel.
Drivel, drivel.
And want to join a theatrical
revolution,
find the handsome couple at the
bar.
And now, the man himself,
Buffalo Hank!
His name is Buffalo Hank?
I'm gonna start with an oldie
but a goodie for a friend here
tonight.
I'm gonna need her to join me to
sing it.
Sandy, get up here!
Come on!
No thanks.
Come up here.
No no, I couldn't possibly.
Get on up there, girl!
Sandy Rothstein, get up here!
Okay okay, fine.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I think you'll recognize this.
Yeah, I have walked these
boots
All across the Great Plains
But I ain't ever found someone
who
Satisfied my heart like my
prairie girl
My prairie girl
Five, six, seven, eight.
You better hold me tight
Yeah, you better treat me
right
Keep me warm through the night
If you ever wanna call me your
prairie girl
Your prairie girl
Yeah, I don't need to fly
So Billy was thrown in jail,
covered in puke, wearing just
the helmet.
Hey screw you man, I still
had a flag around my waist.
Oh yeah, the flag!
Wow, sounds like quite the
funeral.
Oh yeah.
So uh, Tuck.
How'd you meet Sandy?
Tucker.
Charlemagne. The First.
And Sandrene and I met doing a
production
of Romeo and Juliet in the park.
Aww, Central Park?
Thompson Square Park.
It was a movement based
interpretation
for the safe injection site.
So you really think you can
take on the Red River Players?
I mean they've performed
indoors.
Once I find my ensemble and
train them in the tradition
of the avant-garde we will be
unstoppable.
That what they call that
fancy scarf?
"Avant-garde"?
How about those red pants?
Are they a part of the costume?
Does that help you perform?
Oh for Pete's sake, stop it.
No, this isn't...
Tucker, we're razzing you, man.
We're just having fun.
We're just razzing you!
We're having a good time!
Be sensitive.
Beloved!
Was the hope drunk wherein you
dressed yourself?
Hath it slept since?
Immersive theater attack.
And wakes it now to look so
green and pale,
At what it did so freely?
From this time, such I account
Thy love.
Oh my god.
This is a flash mob.
Art thou afeard to be the
same in thine own
act and valor as thou art in
desire?
Wouldst thou have that which
thou
esteem'st the ornament of life,
and live a coward in thine own
esteem?
Prithee peace!
I dare do all that may become a
man.
Who dares do more is none.
What beast was't then that
made you
break this enterprise to me?
Hey!
We don't hit our women out here!
No no no no no!
It's a fight, it's a fight!
It's stage combat, you
simpleton!
Ow ow ow ow ow!
Should we call the police?
Go, go go go!
Get off of him!
Sandrene!
Get him off!
So I hoisted up my britches,
gathered my things, and
hightailed it
out of the theater as fast as I
could.
Incredible.
But I do miss the sense of
community.
Well our theatrical revolution
could give you a community.
Revolution?
Oh I don't know.
I'm already blacklisted in 47
States.
Shall we make that 48?
Okay now, rise and shine.
Everybody out.
Tucker, hey, hi.
No, please, no photographs.
No no no, we were there.
Last night.
Here you go.
Hi, I'm Brady.
This is Jack.
What you guys did was amazing.
Oh yeah, when you guys got in
that fight.
We wanna do what you guys do.
And we're not the only ones.
Jack!
What are you doing here?
Shouldn't you be at lacrosse
practice?
Mom, we agreed that if I got
into
a play I didn't have to do
lacrosse.
Yes, but the Red River Players
did not see your special spark.
Well these guys do.
Radio We got a 419 on I-12.
10-4, Captain Mikkelsen
responding.
I'll be there in five.
Stay out of trouble.
Yeah yeah.
Okay, bye mom.
Radio Okie doke, bye now.
They're here!
Hey everybody, this is Uther.
He can't see you so good, so.
Watch out for these chairs.
Oh thank you.
Told you they'd come.
As long as they'll sign
my community service forms.
Are we picking teams?
Look at them, Sandrene.
So young, so raw, so...
Salutations everyone!
Hello.
They're perfect.
Now if we are going to devise
a play
that will win us that theater,
we need
to assess your individual
strengths so that
we may build them into our final
performance.
So we're not going to just
memorize lines and say them
good?
The stage is where you
arrive, not where you begin.
Write that down.
This is obviously going to take
a while,
so let's clear out a rehearsal
space.
Wait!
We can't do that in here!
Lunch is in an hour.
We need a three dimensional
sketchpad
where artists can take risks,
fail,
and ultimately bear their open
wounds
to the healing salve of artistic
creation.
Oh, we need a room with some
open space to move around.
Oh!
Yes, that makes more sense.
That's what I said.
Well, what about the Tankhouse?
The what?
It used to be the storeroom
for the lodge,
but then the raccoons invaded,
so now
I just use it as my Aquavit
distillery.
Oh, I know that smell.
I squatted in here for a few
moons.
Painted some self-portraits to
keep me company.
I didn't have a mirror.
They're very nice.
All human progress has been in
pursuit of comfort.
Well guess what?
Comfort is the enemy of
creation.
Therefore, partner off.
One of you bend over, the other
vigorously
knead your partner's tailbone.
Get some real pressure in there.
Try a fist.
I have a passion for the
technical side of theater.
Absolutely definitely not
the in-front-of-people side of
theater.
So this is pretty much my worst
nightmare.
Nina!
Speak the speech.
Can I please just take notes?
It'll be so easy.
The wonderful thing about Tucker
and me is we're always on
- The same page.
- The same page.
Mmm, yes, very often we are
thinking.
- The same thoughts.
- The same thing.
Whoa, nice, we got a couple
of naturals over here.
Thank you.
How does that feel?
My buddy came to visit North
Dakota the other day
and he was complaining about the
cold.
And I said what'd you expect?
It's got "coat" right in the
name!
Ha!
I want you to be.
- Slippery as a noodle.
- Stiff as a board.
Perfect technique.
Lovely pressure.
The point, the point.
There you go, really dig in
there.
Geez Leah, ow.
I'm Leah.
I'm the founder of the militant
wing
of Fargo's women's alliance The
Pink Panthers.
Every month I bleed in a cycle,
I howl at the moon!
Like a bolt of lighting!
Swimming in noodles-
Shooting up your spine-
Whether 'tis nobler...
I didn't really fit in as a kid.
The more I got into history,
the more I realized my true
identity.
I am the reincarnated Sweyn
Forkbeard.
And the Tankhouse is a great
outlet for my warrior
tendencies.
Okay, all right, let's go
over this one more time.
It's called "stage combat" so
that
you don't actually have to hit
me.
See, you did it again...
Take five!
I think we're really getting
somewhere.
Ever since my ill-fated attempt
at DIY laser eye surgery,
I have mastered the scent-driven
lifestyle.
I am the master of my body in
space!
Watch out, watch out!
My mead!
That was a choice.
You've got no idea what I'm
feeling
Every time I'm with you, so
hard to be near you
Heart beats-
Why'd you stop singing?
I don't sing without the music.
Well let's see what happens
if you do.
It's easier if you pick a
partner.
Heart beats two times quicker
when I see you
We don't feel like equals
I just mean I'm here and
you're way up there
You're a special type so rare
You look in my eyes, I
scare...
And scene.
You're so tight.
Excuse me, this is an active art
zone.
Oh, sorry.
I heard there was an audition
here?
Sandy.
It's me.
Mackenzie.
I was a freshman when you were a
senior at Fargo High.
When you were Fantine in Les Mis
I was starving prisoner number
two.
We actually swapped mics after I
died in the first scene.
Yes!
Kenzie!
Oh yeah.
I'd always have to go off
looking for you.
You were usually huddled away in
some corner with Hank.
You guys were so cute.
Well thanks for coming in today.
Don't just skulk there like a
street urchin.
State your credentials.
Oh.
Mackenzie Billingham.
CCM class of 2021.
BFA musical theater with a
concentration on acting.
Musical theater "acting?"
More like musical theater
schmacting.
I've actually been
specializing in sense memory.
So I've been reading up on Lee.
Who's Lee?
- Strasberg!
- Strasberg!
Lee Strasberg, the founder of
the method.
The method?
Isn't that what killed that
Joker guy?
Yes.
That's how you knew he was doing
it correctly.
Okay.
Let's see how sensitive your
memory really is.
Okay.
I'm in a hallway and...
I can smell my grandma's chicken
soup.
Mmm.
I can hear the gentle summer
rain hitting the skylight.
I'm walking past the dark wooden
door.
With the brass handle carved by
my grandpa Sven.
I'm not sure you carve brass.
Go on.
Open it.
No.
No, I can't.
It's always locked, that's my
dad's office.
You know where the key is
hidden don't you?
It's in the fern next to the
door.
Grab it.
Open it.
I don't want to.
- Open it!
- Open it!
It's my dad!
Fucking our tennis coach Jim!
I hate you!
I hate you dad, screw you!
- Yes!
- Well done, dear.
It's always those locked doors.
You guys are sick.
I wanna go next.
That was amazing.
Brilliant.
So what do we call ourselves?
Pst!
The Tankhouse Theater.
Their leader, Tucker, says he
wants to start
some sort of a theatrical
revolution.
Oh please.
He's all hat and no cattle.
Fargoans are gonna see through
him
like long johns in a
thunderstorm.
No.
No, they're good.
They got me emotional.
I'm never actually emotional
onstage.
You can be emotional sometimes.
Okay, thank you.
I mean I don't always believe
you,
but yeah yeah yeah, you're
emotional.
Aww, that's really nice of you.
Just get to the point.
Okay okay.
So they're gonna do something
called an immersive theater
attack
at the farmer's market on
Sunday.
Apparently it's gonna shake this
town to its core.
I'm not gonna let some
foppish dandy
take this theater away from me.
Here's what I want you to do.
I want you to infiltrate the
group,
make yourself indispensable, and
then once
you've earned their trust, just
yank
the carpet right out from under
them.
Mr. Mortenson, call me a
calculator.
'Cause you can count on me.
Did you just say that out loud?
I'm so sorry.
Just get outta here.
Okay, yeah, no, I'm sorry.
Hey Sandy!
Here, let me help you.
No, I really gotta get these
back to the theater.
We're only taking a five for
dinner.
Thank you.
I feel real bad about what
happened
at the bar the other night.
No, don't even worry about it.
No, seriously, not cool on my
part.
You guys seem like you make a
good match.
Well thank you.
I appreciate that.
I was just really pumped to
see you.
You know, my mom had a little
party
to watch your Rookie Badge
episode.
What?
I had like two lines in that.
That's so sweet.
No, seriously, when you told
that cop
the suspect threw the girl's
remains
into the dumpster, I totally
bought it.
So can you still audition for
stuff out here?
How does that work?
Yeah, I mean kinda.
I can self-tape for stuff.
Actually, I just ran into this
agent guy in New York.
He said he'd started sending me
out more.
But who knows about that, you
know?
Whoa.
That's awesome.
Yeah.
Yeah, I guess it is kinda cool.
Well, thank you.
This is my stop.
Hey, if you ever need help
with all that,
Let me know.
Thank you.
As long as you thank me in
your Oscar speech.
If I had a nickel for every
time someone asked me that.
Okay, I'll see you.
Yup, okay.
Break a leg!
Thanks!
Five, six, seven, eight.
Yup.
Okay, that's not it at all.
That's okay.
Just lift up your hands like
this.
Mackenzie.
So after some reflection, I
think that we should
make the truth you spoke about
your father
the centerpiece of our
performance on the morrow, hmm?
Oh.
Oh I love that idea.
I'm so ready to share that with
the world.
Yeah, me too, but it is a
great responsibility.
Do you think you can execute?
You can count on me.
Like a calculator.
Oh.
Uh-uh-uh, director eats first!
And antibacterial hand wipes.
Please take one.
Titania.
Come in Titania, are the players
in position?
Oberon, everyone is in
position except Mackenzie.
She hasn't checked in yet
and I don't see her anywhere.
We should do it now.
Lydia's here, she's the head
judge of the competition.
Where is Mackenzie?
I don't know.
Don't worry about McKenzie.
She's the most professional of
the bunch.
Well everyone else is in place.
Good work, Titania.
Oberon out.
Ladies and gentlemen!
My name is Tucker Charlemagne.
And I'm afraid I have some
terrible news.
There's been a murder!
Over there!
Come with me.
Follow!
Quickly!
Townsfolk, stay on my heels!
Just around this vehicle.
No!
Oh my goodness!
What a disaster!
But look, she's still alive.
Beloved, who did this to you?
It was...
It was him!
He's getting away!
I can find him!
Quick, lead us.
But I am weak.
Catch me.
You there.
What can I do?
I'm just a kid.
Play that piano like her life
depends on it.
Okay.
What an authentic expression of
care.
I'm no expert, but authenticity
seems to strengthen him.
That way!
Oh my god.
Well if you don't want me to
be anorexic.
Shh fourth wall-
Hey come on, let's go!
That way!
Come on everybody, let's go!
This way, let's go, let's go.
Inside, thank you, inside.
There's the beast!
I have killed your precious art!
My power is greater than ever
and there's
nothing you can do as stop me!
Oh god!
There's no hope.
How can we ever save art?
Bringing him down will take
a truth bomb of epic
proportions!
Yes.
Yes.
Yes!
Quickly, does anyone have a
truth that needs
to be spoken that hasn't been
given voice before?
Do you have a...
What about you?
Come on, a secret, a truth?
Come on, please, anyone, anyone.
Do you have a truth?
Please, anybody.
Anybody, a truth?
What about...
You!
I say, a truth that hasn't been
spoken!
Nothing about a dad?
Tennis coach?
A door? okay.
Okay.
All right, very well.
I shall do this myself.
From the dawn of time-not right
now.
From the dawn of time,
No, but if it's all the same
to you,
there is a pretty big truth that
I,
we, would like to get off our
chest.
Dude, not now.
Seriously.
It is going to be okay.
Brady!
I promise.
Hey, what's going on here,
kiddo?
Dear town!
Jack and I.
We're together.
You guys.
Called that.
Die.
It's gonna be okay.
Oh yes.
Art is truth brought to life,
and the truth shall set you
free!
Beloved, how amazing!
What an unmitigated disaster.
Darling, it turned out better
than what we had planned.
Let's just go back to the ranch,
have a bacchanal, and move
forward okay?
Wait, I'm confused.
That was amazing, right guys?
Did you hear the applause?
Yeah, the crowd loved it.
No!
If we don't have artists
committed
to our work, then what do we
have?
Hey!
What happened to you?
You really thought I'd join
your group of misfits?
That was cute back there!
I wouldn't call it theater, per
se.
More like a prank really.
You two gathered to conspire
against us?
Good luck to you, Kenzie.
Have fun in a dance studio
conforming for the rest of your
life.
The way I see it, you're like
the boy who cried wolf.
Your little trick can only last
for so long.
People will catch on.
And when they do, you can kick
and scream and prank all you
want.
No one will listen.
Mr. Mortenson, what happened
to you?
You used to be such a
sweetheart.
Sandy, you had such promise
in the day, come join us.
You don't belong with these
people.
No way.
There's no way she would
sully her lily white
hands with your crowd-pleasing
drivel.
Drivel, I know that one.
All right.
Let's settle this right now.
A Modern Major General-off.
Just you and me.
Should I get my sword?
I smell trouble brewing.
A Modern Major General-off?
I've never seen one in real
life.
What's a Modern Major
General-off?
"I Am the Very Model of a
Modern Major-General"
is the fastest song in the
English language canon.
Major General-offs have been
illegal since two
RSC members tried it in 1984 and
broke their jaws.
Betrothd, let me do this.
No darling, this is extremely
perilous.
I know.
He taught me the part in high
school.
I can beat him.
Come on!
We gonna do this or what?
I love you.
Wait.
En garde.
I am the very model of a
modern Major-General
I've information vegetable,
animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And can quote the fights
historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in
order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too,
with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both
the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorems I'm
teeming with a lot of news
With many cheerful facts
About the square of the
hypotenuse
Come on!
You got this.
Go get him.
I'm very good at integral and
differential calculus
I know the scientific names of
beings animalculous
In short, in matters
vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a
modern Major-General
And that, my friends, is how
you operetta, acapella!
It's too fast.
No, he's too fast.
It's okay.
In fact, when I know what is
meant by mamelon and ravelin
When I can tell at sight a
Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely what
is meant by commissariat
Sandy please, be reasonable.
For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and
adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the
century
But still, in matters
vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a
modern Major-General!
Please, please.
To the ranch!
Damn theater kids.
Oh yeah, this is sick.
Wait a minute.
You have to realize that if you
would've just let me
compete against Morten I
would've beat him.
Well after that monumental
cock-up
during our performance it's
become apparent
to me that I have to do
everything myself.
Then why have an ensemble?
God, you're so controlling
sometimes.
You call it controlling, I
call it directing.
The play was great without
Mackenzie.
No.
Yeah, sometimes things don't
go according to plan,
and then you work around them
and they end up being fine.
Stop being such a mule.
I'm being authentic to the
craft, 'Drene.
If you let things slide, next
thing
you know we're doing a gender
specific
production of The Sound of
Music.
Don't!
I just can't handle any more
betrayal, capiche?
Oh geez!
What?
Sorry.
It's locked.
We can't get in.
You have a key to the barn?
Yes, I have the keys.
Come on in, you guys.
I smell hay!
Mi casa es su casa.
I have water.
I've never been around underage
drinking before.
All right everyone, I wanna
make an announcement.
Thank you.
Beloved.
I just want to raise a goblet to
these two beautiful boys.
Planning that surprise was the
perfect example of risk.
Well we didn't plan it.
Congratulations to all!
Drink up!
Skol!
I love fruit punch!
Look bonbon, I think we
should agree to disagree.
I don't wanna fight with you.
I love you.
Let's just have fun tonight,
okay?
Drink up.
Okay.
If you're ever going
to discover the true purpose of
theater,
you must have this experience.
It is absolutely not a thing.
What do you, explain your
point with words please.
When you're dancing with the
lighting,
and dancers, and your lighting
with dancers,
you wanna see their angles and
the bodies and the shapes.
Look, poppet.
Huh?
The group is really starting
to "cohese."
Yes, it's like they're
melting together
like a Croque Monsieur.
You mad?
Did you consider maybe I
didn't wanna
come out to the whole farmer's
market?
But what are you so worried
about, man?
I mean your mom?
Dude, she was totally happy.
That's 'cause everyone was
watching.
This town is mad conservative,
dude.
You have no idea.
I do though.
Don't do that.
Boys, what is doing on over
here huh?
Nothing like a little
showmance to spice up the gumbo.
Did we ever tell you about
the first time
that Sandrene and I made love?
Why do you guys smell like
garlic?
It was a cast party just like
this one.
Just let me out first.
Just let me out first!
Yeah, hi.
Can I get 10 extra large with
zucchini flowers if you have it?
Oh.
Mr. Marlow.
Is that a scimitar or are you
just happy to see me?
Brian, hey.
A self-tape?
Really?
Yeah.
No, I'm in Fargo.
Yeah, it comes out sometimes.
Yeah, okay.
I'll get it in immediately.
Okay perfect.
Great, bye.
Rise and shine!
Ideokinesis on the porch!
Everybody up!
Ideokinesis is an intimate
technique that opens
the energy centers around the
pelvic floor.
Ooh yeah, that's good.
Trust the process, children.
Oh Brady, look what you did.
Oh my god, no!
I'm done with this!
All right, calm down
everybody, calm down.
I know it's wet, I know it's
cold, all right?
But we're gonna do a couple more
sacrum scrubs and then it's back
to town.
Darling, look.
The Squire.
All the way from New York City?
Ah.
Good Squire.
What news bring you?
Hear ye, hear ye!
I come bearing tragic news!
It is with great sorrow that I
inform you that
Buford Schlesinger, the honored
artistic director
of the Artist's Atelier, after
his decades-long
battle with gout, has passed
away!
No no no no no!
No!
Buford!
No!
Buford!
Why?
I don't know what this is
about right now.
Rehearsals dismissed!
I'm sorry, but we kinda got a
ride with you...
Get another ride!
Absolutely, totally understand.
We'll figure it out.
Why take it
It is thine
Again.
I can't, Mr. Mortenson.
I've done it a thousand times.
Again please!
I'm literally dying up here,
I can't do this anymore!
You're dying?
From singing a song?
Get her outta here.
Get her smelling salts for all I
care.
Hey!
Lisa, Ashley, what the hell are
you doing?
I told you, no cell phones in
the rehearsal space.
Why don't we ever get to
massage each other?
What the hell are you talking
about?
Brady is posting them all at
the Tankhouse cast party.
It looks so fun.
I'm so jealous.
All of their warmups are
clothing optional.
Theater is about hard work.
Precision.
Pain.
It's not some bordello.
Well maybe if you had more fun
you wouldn't have lost the
Major-General off.
Excuse me?
Just doing a tongue stretch.
Well it won't be fun when I
show Captain Mikkelsen this.
Oh Buford!
Why would you leave me here?
Pretty cool getting to be a
part of the movie magic.
Hope I can do uh... "Logan"
justice.
Yeah, hold on, sorry.
The lighting is perfect right
now,
so if we could just get started
'cause they're casting this off
the tape.
And it's for the CW, so I need
to look CW-ish.
Whoa!
CW.
Are you gonna be a sexy witch or
a sexy werewolf?
I'm kidding.
Okay, let's get going.
Tucker's guru just died and I
need to hold
the bucket for him while he
purges his grief.
Wait.
Does he know you're here?
Tuck really hates network
television.
He thinks it's "lulling the
masses into a stupor"
"while they get disenfranchised
by the ruling class."
Or something.
I know he's a lot, and I know
you don't
understand him, but he's
passionate
and ambitious and driven and
we...
Need each other.
But you can't be honest with
each other?
You always told me that your big
dream was to be on TV.
It was.
It is.
Well.
Is Tucker a part of that dream?
Come here come here come here.
Thank you so much.
You're the best.
Okay.
Pauline.
Whoa!
Morten, what are you doing
hiding down there
like a pregnant possum in a
pumpkin patch?
What has gotten into you?
Seems like everyone around here
is losing
their right minds over this
competition.
Something I wanna show you.
Huh?
Oh.
Did you sleep at all last
night, darling?
I'm not sure.
I took about eight Melatonin at
5 AM.
I just can't stop thinking about
the last thing that Buford ever
said to me.
I was to find the true purpose
of theater.
Well we've brought people
together
and helped them find their
voices as artists.
And our final performance can be
a place
to showcase what makes our
ensemble so special.
No.
No?
No.
Buford sent me here to redefine
theater as we know it.
Oh is that what he said?
And these people will be the
raw materials
with which I craft my
masterpiece!
Tucker, you're getting
carried away.
Hey Tucker?
Yorick and I have been
channeling our rage
into this really cool stage
combat sequence
that we think would be great for
the finale.
Ooh, and I can't wait to try
out my crowd work.
Thank you all for your
suggestions,
but they will not be necessary.
Tucker.
I've been very clear with you
all from the outset.
Our mission here is to create a
theatrical revolution
so that I may take my rightful
place
at the apex of the avant-garde.
Now Buford's death, I'm sorry,
confirms.
That my time is now.
So, like, we've all never
been totally sure who Buford is?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
That's very funny.
Ladies and gentlemen, there
comes a point
in every artist's journey where
he, or she,
must take a step back from
creating their own work
and take part in the equally
fulfilling task
of executing other people's
instructions!
Ha.
I'm sorry, Nina.
Something humorous?
That's exactly what Morton
said when I demoed
my take for the lighting design
of Pirates.
Yes dear, weren't you the one
that teased them about
conforming?
No.
No no, no no no no no no, that
is completely different.
Look, this is not a debate.
You will all execute my
instructions,
we will win that theater, and
that is final!
- Whoa!
- Hey!
What happened?
No one leaves this room until
I am satisfied!
My phone is charging in the bar
My mom is gonna wonder where I
am.
This is a fire hazard.
What are we going to eat?
There's no food in here.
There's plenty of Aquavit.
Eww.
Ugh.
Faster!
Faster faster faster!
Slower slower slower!
One hand fast, the other slow!
That one's fast, that one's
slow!
Go go go!
'Drene are you getting this?
Yes.
Okay, fast, slow, fast!
The sun burns.
Oh my god, it's 9:55.
We have five minutes to get
there.
Tucker, you weren't keeping
track of the time?
I didn't hear the lark.
Did you hear the lark?
I'm gonna use the slingshot.
No no no, I think we decided on
the North Korean style movement
piece with the streamers.
I hear footsteps.
Did we decide live horse
or a dead horse?
Hello?
Where is everyone?
Does somebody have any
mouthwash?
Hello, is this Jax Winn?
Yeah, hello, this is Captain
Pauline Mikkelsen
of the Fargo PD, I just had a
question for you
about an immersive theater
performance.
Lydia.
Oh hi, nice to see you.
Whoa!
What are you whispering about?
Do you need tampons?
'Cause I have those.
No, I...
Do you need Extra Plus?
I have that too.
No no, I only use pads.
Tucker, you changed your mind
30,000 times last night.
Now nobody has any idea what's
going on and everyone
thinks your masterpiece is gonna
be a disaster.
And now, ladies and gents,
please welcome to the stage the
Red River Players.
For I am a pirate king
You are, hurrah for the pirate
king
And it is, it is a glorious
thing
To be a pirate king
Poor wand'ring one
Though thou hast surely
strayed
Take heart of grace
Thy steps retrace
Poor wand'ring one
Are they good?
Poor wand'ring one
If such a poor heart as mine
Can help thee find
True peace of mind
Why take it
It is
Thine
Say something.
Well wasn't that something?
Group, comrades, quickly gather.
Up next, let's give it up
for The Tankhouse Theater.
Just remember to...
Commit to the text and
everything will be fine.
There's no text.
Places!
- From the dawn of time!
- How dare you!
I've been cuckolded before
mine own eyes.
Ah yes, the eye of the play!
'Drene!
How could you do this to me?
Beloved, what in the devil?
What is happening?
This is part of their whole
"thing."
Don't act like you don't know
what I'm talking about.
Know what?
That you've been cheating on
me with Hank!
Salacious!
Okay, I wasn't cheating on you,
but can we please talk about
this...
I trusted you!
We weren't cheating.
Now you're going to lie?
He was helping me with a
self-tape.
A.
Self.
Tape.
I can never forgive you.
What's a self-tape?
Well I'm sorry, but it's for
a new CW show.
It's between me and one other
girl
and I find out any minute if I
got it.
Sorry, what's happening?
The CW, it's like, real TV.
Wow!
Are you gonna be a sexy witch?
Or a sexy werewolf?
Oh my god, Sandrene, you have
to come on my podcast when
you're famous.
Yeah, I'm sure all 13 of your
listeners would love that,
Brady.
Okay Jack.
Can we stop this?
I love you, okay?
I love you!
Oh, oh, oh!
You have a missed call!
Ooh-hoo, it's from 2-1-2.
I'm dialing.
Here, here.
Hey Brian.
Yeah.
What?
What?
You're kidding!
Oh my god!
Oh my god.
I got the part!
I got it!
I got the part!
Yeah!
No no no no, stop stop stop
stop!
Sandrene, you're not gonna do it
right?
What?
Think about our artistic
revolution.
Tucker.
Tucker, this is all I ever
wanted.
It's the opportunity of a
lifetime.
They're literally flying me out
tomorrow morning.
I can't believe you're gonna
be on the CW.
This is so amazing.
No.
It's not amazing.
It's betrayal.
Ensemble.
And.
I guess, audience.
I'm afraid I have an
announcement to make.
Sandrene is no longer a member
of the Tankhouse.
She was too busy selling out.
Truly typical, Tucker.
You hide behind your art, but
you
wish you had these
opportunities.
And it kills you to see others,
especially me, get them!
'Cause you think you're better
than everyone else!
And you're not.
You're not.
Heaven truly knows that thou
art false as hell.
How am I false?
Leave her alone!
Sandrene needs a real man.
Oh no no no, Hankery, take her!
You can be happy little hayseeds
together.
You, we, are done!
Great!
Then you can just swiftly move
out of my parents' ranch,
which you've been staying in by
the way, for free!
"Free" is...
Did you even send my mother a
thank you note?
If I hear about these thank
you notes one more time...
Everyone just shut up!
We dedicated our time and effort
to this company because we
believed in you two!
And now look at you!
You're childish and you're
selfish
and you don't care about art!
I am resetting for top of show
and we are trying this again!
Okay?
Oh, that must be it.
Look, they're clapping.
Why are they clapping?
Wow.
How much fun was that?
Let's give it up for The
Tankhouse Theater.
Stop!
Stop!
Is this part of it too?
I don't know.
I have sworn testimony
confirming
Tucker Charlemagne and Sandrene
Rothstein's
prohibition from performing in
New York.
Due to their negligence leading
to the death of an audience
member
during one of their
performances.
No one implicated in a felony
can take possession of a city
landmark.
They cannot win the theater.
Please.
Shire Reeve, I implore you.
In good conscience I can't
let you corrupt my son,
or these people, for one more
minute.
I'm the corrupter?
I shared my gifts with you
yokels!
Pearls suckled from the teat of
America's
theatrical breast, New York
City!
You heard of it?
It's not my fault if these
bumpkins
can't grasp the grandeur I'm
giving them!
Tucker, control thyself!
And thank you, Sandy Rothstein,
for teaching me that success
only comes
when you toss aside those you
care about most
in the pursuit of your own
selfish purposes.
Well consider yourself tossed.
Well in light of this
news, I guess
we have no other option but to
award
the Fargo Theater to the Red
River Players.
Oofta.
Oh my god.
I cannot believe the Tankhouse
people
are full on psycho murderers.
I wonder who tipped off Captain
Pauline.
Oh my god.
It was you.
Mr. Mortenson, I love that.
Shh.
Just keep your voice down.
This is nothing to be proud of.
Well then why did you do it?
You have your whole life
ahead of you.
Endless possibilities.
All I have is a past filled with
missed opportunities.
And a present that I'm working
very hard to make tolerable.
I'm sorry, I didn't realize
that...
What?
That I'm not through dreaming?
Tucker!
Uther, what are you doing here?
What are you doing here?
I'm done!
I'm going to let this river
carry me northward
to Canadia where I will start
anew amongst the moose.
Tucker, do you know why I
keep my glasses on?
Yes, it was after a failed
corrective eye surgery
that you did on yourself with a
laser pointer.
Bah, that's just the party line.
In truth, my eyes work.
What?
They can reveal things in
people.
I can't control it.
And the emotional burden is...
It's too much for me.
So I keep myself blinded.
Most people aren't ready for the
truth.
I'm ready for my truth.
I know.
Have I told you about
my production of A Doll's House?
Our first adaptation was devised
in the jungles of Siberia.
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
I just feel so guilty and
ungrateful
and just a total asshole.
Leaving all these people that I
love and care about.
Look.
If they really love you, they'll
understand
that you've gotta follow your
dreams.
And if they don't, then it
sounds to me
like they got some growing up to
do.
You are the most talented person
I've ever met.
Wow.
That was so crazy.
Yeah.
I've been waiting for so long
for a sign.
For some reason for me to get
out of here and this is it.
I can come with you, I'll make
your place a home.
You're gonna be so busy and you
need stability.
Well...
I can cook.
I can clean, I can take care of
you.
Hell, maybe I can even figure
out
the music scene in New York
City.
Okay, Hank, Hank, hi.
No.
This is my journey.
And if I have learned anything
it's that
I can't have someone depending
on me to give their life
meaning.
Okay?
Yeah.
Guys guys guys!
Okay.
Uther, how did you get here?
Uber.
Oh.
Didn't know they had that.
Look, I just, I wanted to say
that I am,
I'm so sorry for all the
horrible
eloquently-worded things that I
said earlier.
I've come to the realization
that...
I now understand the true
purpose of theater.
It's about community, you know?
And bringing people closer.
Trying to figure out this crazy
life together.
And I wanna be here.
I wanna be a part of your
family.
Your community.
No thanks, I think we're all
set.
Yeah.
I'm gonna help Yorick get his
distilling license
so that he can sell his
moonshine legally.
Proceeds will go to Tankhouse.
What?
Wait, what?
We are turning Tankhouse into
our permanent theater.
That's.
Amazing.
If you could just find a place
for me here,
I would be eternally grateful.
You know, someone once told
me a stage
is where you arrive, not where
you begin.
If you want to join us.
You'll have to audition.
Just like everyone else?
Just like everyone else.
Yes.
Okay.
Sign me up.
Oi!
Everyone!
To Tankhouse!
Patrons: To Tankhouse!
Tankhouse.
Ooh!
I am so sorry.
Tonight is our opening night of
"Art Assault"
An immersive show that we've
been
working on the past few weeks.
I was given a more
instrumental part
in the production since Sandrene
had to leave to shoot her show.
It was a little awkward at first
because Tucker kept forgetting I
wasn't Sandrene.
I'll take care of it.
Whoa!
I forgot.
I heard she's coming to the
show tonight.
Yeah, we're back together.
Boing!
On one condition.
Our one rule is I'm not
really supposed
to talk about him in my standup,
so.
Yeah.
So I'm hanging with my
girlfriend
the other day, sucking her dick.
Future mother-in-law everybody.
Give it up for Pauline, police
captain.
We weren't able to get the
licensing
for my moonshine, but we were
able to use
the equipment to make a cologne
designed by Uther.
Turns out his crazy sense of
smells does come in handy.
We got it in all the duty frees!
So since the competition I've
taken over as technical
director.
That's why it's so neat in here.
After some self-reflection,
and Leah sitting me down
and explaining to me how I'm
part of "the problem,"
I decided I needed to take a
step back
from leadership for a while.
So I demoted myself to squire.
Scroll for you, sir!
Thank you, good sir.
Good day!
This is why we have spell check.
Oh.
So I've been taking an
experimental acting class at CCM.
So I had to come see Art
Assault.
Once I confronted my dad about
the whole
sense memory exercise, he
finally came out to me.
But yeah, he and Jim should be
here any second.
Beat the chest!
King Kong the chest, yes.
Sandrene?
Hey guys!
How are you?
I missed you so much!
You looks so pretty.
You really got that CW glow.
I've missed you guys.
We've missed you too.
I love your romper.
Let's all take five in the
antechamber, huh?
Take me, thank you.
I just wanted to give them a
little space.
Actually it's time to
hydrate, guys.
Hi.
Hey 'Drene.
I was just counting the chairs
for the...
How's the show?
Good, good, yeah, really good.
Great actually.
Jack, he's really come out of
his shell.
Leah has a beautiful movement
piece
about cryptic pregnancies that
came to her
in a dream actually, so yeah,
it's great.
Look at you giving the actors
freedom.
It's nice.
What about you?
How's your... show?
It's great.
We just finished filming the
first two episodes.
Learning a lot.
The cast is cool.
Are you gonna go see Hank
after this, or...
What?
No.
No, Tucker.
He's just trying to find himself
Like the rest of us.
I'm really happy though.
I hope you are too.
I really do miss you.
Oh hey, Tucker?
Ah, Nina.
What news bring you?
Sorry, it's just we have to
open the house now.
It's company members only.
Oh my god, of course.
Break a leg, you guys.
All right guys, places!
'Cause I'm still not used
To being not used to you
Hello?
Where is everyone?
Uther.
Welcome.
Come on in.
Feel free to sit wherever you'd
like.
Welcome.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Beware!
But enjoy.
Thank you.
Well hello, ladies.
You brought your own instrument
huh?
Come on in, welcome, thank you
for coming.
The chairs for the agd are just
inside, Captain.
Good.
Immersive Theater Attack!
It feels like I betray
When I can't make it okay
That I've gone away
Now I've become your problems
I can't solve them
Make a fool of those you claim
Tell them you'll stay the same
When you know you'll change
You can't not change
Ah, look at us.
My beloved and me bound together
by art and love.
Ready to take on the world.
How could we have known that our
quest
for redemption would tear us
asunder?
Oh, but I'm getting ahead of
myself.
Long before Fargo I was just
Tucker Charlemagne,
a newly minted bachelor of fine
arts in New York City.
But what set me apart from my
fellow bearded
caucasian alums was my
partnership with Sandrene.
I'll never forget the moment we
first locked eyes.
I was directing a movement piece
when suddenly
a shock of hay blonde hair
commanded my attention.
Sandrene Rothstein from far off
North Dakota with dreams of TV
stardom.
She was doing research for a
role
in a new detective show, "Rookie
Badge."
From there began a romance
punctuated by a whirlwind
of Shakespearian performances
throughout the boroughs.
But when Rookie Badge finally
aired they had
brutally cut out nearly her
entire part.
Sandrene was devastated.
So I invited her to join me at
the Artist Atelier Acting Studio
under
legendary acting teacher Buford
Schlesinger.
I have only two notes.
One, a working actress must
always carry a fan.
And two, if you wanna make it in
this business
you've got to immediately lose
10 pounds.
Buford forged us in the flames
of the avant-garde.
Sadly, a chronic battle with
gout left him
wheelchair bound and he
nominated
Sandrene and me as his
successors, instructing us
to devise our premiere
performance.
I can see it now.
3 AM atop a derelict warehouse
in The Bronx.
We had a packed house plus a
comped ticket
for Jax Winn, lead theater
critic
of the Black Box Chronicle.
Let's knock them dead.
Yeah.
David!
The stage was set for us
to unveil our signature
innovation.
The Immersive Theater Attack.
A thrusting of the audience into
the performance
with the power to jolt
theatergoers
out of their comfort zone.
Immersive Theater Attack!
How slow this old moon wanes...
Four nights will quickly
dream away the time,
And then the moon shall behold
the night of our solemnities.
For a moment it seemed as though
Sandrene and I were on the edge
of a new dawn.
Awake the nimble spirit of
mirth!
Turn melancholy forth to
funerals!
But as quickly as it began,
so did it abruptly end.
Oh.
Nana?
My god.
I can still hear Jax
Winn's damning words.
Don't write that down.
"The tragic death of theater
patron"
"Doris Feinstein overshadowed"
"an otherwise scattershot
production."
Scattershot?
"From The Confidential
Collective."
It's not my fault that Jax
Winn can't see
that such a "tragedy" is
precisely what
an immersive theater attack is
all about.
You monster!
What Tucker is trying to say
is that
we are so, so sorry for your
loss.
And we promise that such a
tragedy will never happen again.
Yes, it was a once in a
lifetime anomaly.
Oh really?
From our very first workshop
where
you forced us to use real guns!
To adding unstimulated sexual
intercourse with each other.
To last night, when Asher's
Nana, and by the way,
our only source of funding,
died.
After she lived as she never
had before!
I have here an official
petition,
from the members of the
"Artist's Atelier"
"Presents The Confidential
Collective,"
demanding that Tucker and
Sandrene step down.
Judas!
Buford, surely you must
appreciate
the divine influences at work
here.
Our production's birth.
Nana's death.
It's the circle of life.
Don't patronize me, young man.
I must respect the will of The
Collective.
You two are hereby banned from
all outreach activities.
Not the Artist's Atelier
Prison Unit.
Without a working knowledge of
iambic pentameter
they'll never be able to reenter
society!
Due to your extreme
recklessness,
I have no choice but to award
leadership
of The Collective into the hands
of David.
- No!
- No!
Squire, please escort these two
out of the rehearsal studio.
Cowards!
Conformists!
Darling, let's just go.
No no, we will remount our
rooftop spectacular
and it will shake this town to
its very core!
Okay Tucker, they're in the
elevator, so please be nice.
If we want to remount the show
we need their money.
Well how am I supposed to
impress them when
the injera hasn't even had a
chance to leaven?
Nobody forced you to make an
Ethiopian feast from scratch.
Well why don't we just open
up a couple cans
of baked beans and throw them
into
a Home Depot bucket and call it
a day?
Bob: We're here!
Where's our little celeb?
Mom!
Hi sweetie.
Daddy.
There's our girl.
Hey hey hey!
Look at your hair.
Is it yours?
Mom.
There's the big boy!
Tucker, hi!
Hey, hello.
Bob: Tuck!
I love your costume.
Oh actually it is a
traditional robe
pilfered from the tomb of one of
the last
known relatives of Alexander
the... Good.
Okay.
Well here.
I brought you this fresh sack of
homemade bison jerky.
Oh, you shouldn't have.
Bison.
Go on.
Tuck, take a pull.
Daddy, we're vegans now.
Remember that documentary I sent
you?
Yeah, well it's not meat,
it's jerky.
Go on, take a bite.
You know what?
I am going to save this and dive
into it later.
I'll be offended if you don't
try it.
Well I'd hate to offend you.
I shall
"Take a pull" as you say.
You're so bad.
There you go!
Put some hair on your chest.
You're getting that nice smokey
mesquite!
I can taste it in the...
In the...
The tendons.
What time's the performance?
Oh yeah, what did you guys
transform into theater this
time?
Is it another public restroom in
Prospect Park?
Because we came prepared.
Well about that.
The production is...
Being retooled.
Oh geez, how come?
We decided to leave our
theater company.
So there's no show?
Well we are gonna remount the
rooftop show on our own.
But you know, first we're gonna
need
some additional funding before
we can do...
Ha!
I told you!
You did, Bob, you did.
That they couldn't make it
through to dessert.
Daddy please, we've been
working on this for four years.
It'll literally make our
reputation in New York.
We wouldn't ask for anything
ever again.
Ever again.
That's good.
You really are your mother's
daughter.
Sandy, your mother and I have
been talking
and we think it's high time you
two start
pulling yourselves up by your
own bootstraps.
We are artists, Bob.
Not plumbers.
Well we have been bankrolling
this whole
artist lifestyle for long
enough.
So it is time to grow up and
start earning a living.
Because we cannot justify this
freeloading here any longer.
Got it?
Let's go.
We'll see if we can find one of
those halal carts.
So what, you're just cutting
us off?
That bison jerky's my last
handout.
You hear?
Wait, no, mommy please!
Mommy.
You know I don't have the
forearm
strength to be a waitress.
Well there is one thing, but...
No, anything mommy, please.
You know the Fargo City Council
is revitalizing Main Street.
Yeah.
Well they've renovated the
Fargo Theater.
And they're having a competition
next month
to award a residency to one
local theater company.
Oh Tucker, you should see the
Fargo Theater.
It's so beautiful.
Yes.
Oh yes, wonderful.
We can perform for the spillover
from the local cattle auction.
Come to Fargo.
And try and win the theater.
Sweetie, I think you have a
shot.
And you can stay at the ranch
while we're on safari in
Tanzania.
Otherwise, your father's right.
You can't live in fantasy land
anymore.
Conductor: Stand clear of the
closing doors please.
Tucker?
Come have a word with me at the
Atelier.
Have I told you about my
off-off-Broadway
production of A Doll's House
Which Walter Kerr called
"a neorealist's wet dream?"
Wet dream, yeah.
I wish I had been alive to see
it.
I would've sat in the splash
zone.
The first adaptation of that
was devised in the jungles of
Siberia.
I didn't know that they had
jungles in the Arctic.
The snow.
The mosquitoes!
Collaborating with comrades
toward a single goal.
It made me the artist I am
today.
If you're ever going to discover
the true purpose of theater
Yes.
You must have this experience
too.
But the New York theater is
my home.
But you'll never understand
it until you step away
to discover the true purpose of
that theater.
I see.
It's all clear to me now.
It's all for your own good,
my boy.
The gout has eaten its way
from your foot
to your brain and infected it.
That's medically impossible.
King Lear would be proud.
Tucker, you must realize.
You're standing in your own way.
Do you see this?
It's literally real fake fur.
I'm sure you can get tons for
it.
Also this one.
Oh my god.
Sandy.
Brian.
Is that you?
Brian!
Hey.
So how are you?
How's it going?
Who are you with?
Oh.
Tucker.
No no no no, who are you repped
by?
Oh.
Oh no no, I don't have an agent.
Really?
You didn't get signed after your
Rookie Badge recurring?
Oh no, we took over the
theater company
right after that, so we've been
really busy.
So I just got promoted to
coordinator
at United Talent International.
UTI, right.
I'm starting to hip pocket my
own clients
and I would love to send you out
on some stuff.
See if anything sticks.
Really?
Sandrene, you are way too legit
to spend your life pawning
pashminas.
You'll never perform in
this city again!
Hello?
Hello?
Did you find us a theater?
No.
Everyone in this town thinks
we're murderers.
Or, as your father's lawyer
says,
"involuntary manslaughterers."
Great.
There's gotta be a way.
What are we missing?
Sandrene.
Brilliant!
Brilliant!
What?
This face mask has particles
of 24 karat gold in it.
If we chemically separate it and
melt it down
into bullion, I've heard tell of
a man
in Venezuela who will pay top
dollar for...
Tucker!
What?
Look at us!
Is this what our life is gonna
be like?
What choice do we have?
We can't get real jobs.
- Of course.
- Of course.
We can go to Fargo.
Sandrene, please be serious.
I am.
The competition, the Fargo
Theater.
This could be our chance to do
what we've always dreamed.
No, I will not cast my theatrical
pearls before... bison.
You're missing the forest for
the trees.
We wouldn't have to worry about
money.
We'd live at my parents' ranch
and we'd
have the freedom to make
whatever we want.
Like a retreat.
A retreat.
Like the jungles of Siberia...
There are no jungles in Siberia.
But nobody in Fargo would
have experience.
We'd have to start from scratch.
Exactly!
We'd have a blank canvas to
create whatever we want.
Also rent's due tomorrow, so
unless
your gold extractor's up and
running
we best start looking for a
tent.
Oh.
Ahh, the city gates.
At least we've arrived.
Yeah, but my parents' ranch
is still two miles down that
way.
Let's go.
We should've just stayed in
the car.
Ahh, there she blows.
Mmm yes, the historic
Fargo Theater.
We would be its ideal
custodians.
Come with me.
This could be our Globe.
Though, you know,
Hopefully less flammable.
I used to sneak in here.
Pretend I was on Broadway.
Never actually got to perform
here though.
But soft, what light through
yonder window breaks?
It is the east.
And Juliet is the sun.
Oh Romeo, Romeo.
Wherefore art thou Romeo?
Deny thy father and refuse thy
name.
Or if thou wilt not, be but
sworn
my love and I will no longer
be...
Morten: Rothstein?
Mr. Mortenson?
Sandy Rothstein, live and in
person?
Treading the boards?
Oh fer cute, Sandy Rothstein.
How long has it been since our
legendary drama class?
You look wonderful!
So do you.
Thank you.
And actually I go by my stage
name St. Jean now.
Sandy St. Jean, I like that.
Sandrene.
Sandrene St. John, even
better.
Well you came up with it.
Well let's applaud me!
Excuse me good sir, but we were
in the throes of artistic
creation.
- No no no, Tucker, this is Mr.
- Mortenson.
My high school drama teacher.
He's the one that taught me how
to sing
and dance and get rid of my
accent
so I could make it in New York.
It's true.
And you are?
Tucker Charlemagne, if you
please.
Tucker's my fiance.
Oh.
Cute.
So what are you doing home, huh?
Visiting the folks?
No, we are here to start an
artistic
revolution and claim this
theater.
I see.
Oh, maybe you can help us
actually.
We need to cast our ensemble and
Mr. Mortenson
knows all the best actors in
town.
It's true, I do.
But I'm afraid they're not
available.
Why not?
Because they're in my ensemble.
Ensemble!
Get out here, kids.
There you are.
Your body is your instrument.
You're a symphony, all of you.
Okay, no tension.
There you go, that's beautiful.
You see, a lot has changed since
you left, Sandy.
West Fargo High has cut the
drama department.
What?
Why?
They used the money to buy
an ice bath for the football
team.
So I had to go out on my own,
build my own
repertory company to perform all
the classics like we used to do.
And yes, there is a competition
for the theater, but it's
perfunctory.
The Red River Players are poised
to win.
We could use an immense talent
like yours.
Sandrene would never betray me.
Tucker, please.
There's a dearth of local
talent here.
A lot of people auditioned.
If you want to see the rejects,
they're all
performing open mic night down
at the Sons of Norway.
Sandy.
You.
And so friend becomes foe.
Come on, I need to get a drink.
Norway.
Ibsen, very good.
Good.
Well if only we were looking
for farmhands and cowpokes.
Don't fret, darling.
I'm gonna ask around.
We will find our band of merry
minstrels or my name isn't...
Sandy?
Oh my god, Hank!
Look at you, Miss Thing.
How long has it been, seven
years?
Yeah, since that summer after
graduation.
Sure has.
How now?
Tucker, this is Hank.
Hank, this is Tucker.
Her partner.
Creatively, spiritually,
and soon to be... matrimonially.
And you told me you weren't
the marrying kind.
Yeah, well a lot has changed
since high school.
And yet here you are.
Yes!
Tough crowd tonight, man.
Aw please, your music's just
lost on these fossils!
Oi Hank, you're up.
All right.
Who is that hayseed?
No, that "hayseed" is my
boyfriend
from high school, remember?
I told you about him many times.
He still seems very enamord.
Tuck, please.
He never left Fargo.
You know how that bothers me.
You don't seem botherd.
Before our next act, I'm obliged
to remind you all that the Red
River Players
will be presenting a medley from
their
production of Pirates of
Penzance
at the Fargo Theater competition
this month.
Whoop de doo.
Also, if you don't want to be a
part
of that musical theater drivel.
Dryvel?
Dribble?
Drivel, you were right the
first time.
Drivel.
Drivel, drivel.
And want to join a theatrical
revolution,
find the handsome couple at the
bar.
And now, the man himself,
Buffalo Hank!
His name is Buffalo Hank?
I'm gonna start with an oldie
but a goodie for a friend here
tonight.
I'm gonna need her to join me to
sing it.
Sandy, get up here!
Come on!
No thanks.
Come up here.
No no, I couldn't possibly.
Get on up there, girl!
Sandy Rothstein, get up here!
Okay okay, fine.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I think you'll recognize this.
Yeah, I have walked these
boots
All across the Great Plains
But I ain't ever found someone
who
Satisfied my heart like my
prairie girl
My prairie girl
Five, six, seven, eight.
You better hold me tight
Yeah, you better treat me
right
Keep me warm through the night
If you ever wanna call me your
prairie girl
Your prairie girl
Yeah, I don't need to fly
So Billy was thrown in jail,
covered in puke, wearing just
the helmet.
Hey screw you man, I still
had a flag around my waist.
Oh yeah, the flag!
Wow, sounds like quite the
funeral.
Oh yeah.
So uh, Tuck.
How'd you meet Sandy?
Tucker.
Charlemagne. The First.
And Sandrene and I met doing a
production
of Romeo and Juliet in the park.
Aww, Central Park?
Thompson Square Park.
It was a movement based
interpretation
for the safe injection site.
So you really think you can
take on the Red River Players?
I mean they've performed
indoors.
Once I find my ensemble and
train them in the tradition
of the avant-garde we will be
unstoppable.
That what they call that
fancy scarf?
"Avant-garde"?
How about those red pants?
Are they a part of the costume?
Does that help you perform?
Oh for Pete's sake, stop it.
No, this isn't...
Tucker, we're razzing you, man.
We're just having fun.
We're just razzing you!
We're having a good time!
Be sensitive.
Beloved!
Was the hope drunk wherein you
dressed yourself?
Hath it slept since?
Immersive theater attack.
And wakes it now to look so
green and pale,
At what it did so freely?
From this time, such I account
Thy love.
Oh my god.
This is a flash mob.
Art thou afeard to be the
same in thine own
act and valor as thou art in
desire?
Wouldst thou have that which
thou
esteem'st the ornament of life,
and live a coward in thine own
esteem?
Prithee peace!
I dare do all that may become a
man.
Who dares do more is none.
What beast was't then that
made you
break this enterprise to me?
Hey!
We don't hit our women out here!
No no no no no!
It's a fight, it's a fight!
It's stage combat, you
simpleton!
Ow ow ow ow ow!
Should we call the police?
Go, go go go!
Get off of him!
Sandrene!
Get him off!
So I hoisted up my britches,
gathered my things, and
hightailed it
out of the theater as fast as I
could.
Incredible.
But I do miss the sense of
community.
Well our theatrical revolution
could give you a community.
Revolution?
Oh I don't know.
I'm already blacklisted in 47
States.
Shall we make that 48?
Okay now, rise and shine.
Everybody out.
Tucker, hey, hi.
No, please, no photographs.
No no no, we were there.
Last night.
Here you go.
Hi, I'm Brady.
This is Jack.
What you guys did was amazing.
Oh yeah, when you guys got in
that fight.
We wanna do what you guys do.
And we're not the only ones.
Jack!
What are you doing here?
Shouldn't you be at lacrosse
practice?
Mom, we agreed that if I got
into
a play I didn't have to do
lacrosse.
Yes, but the Red River Players
did not see your special spark.
Well these guys do.
Radio We got a 419 on I-12.
10-4, Captain Mikkelsen
responding.
I'll be there in five.
Stay out of trouble.
Yeah yeah.
Okay, bye mom.
Radio Okie doke, bye now.
They're here!
Hey everybody, this is Uther.
He can't see you so good, so.
Watch out for these chairs.
Oh thank you.
Told you they'd come.
As long as they'll sign
my community service forms.
Are we picking teams?
Look at them, Sandrene.
So young, so raw, so...
Salutations everyone!
Hello.
They're perfect.
Now if we are going to devise
a play
that will win us that theater,
we need
to assess your individual
strengths so that
we may build them into our final
performance.
So we're not going to just
memorize lines and say them
good?
The stage is where you
arrive, not where you begin.
Write that down.
This is obviously going to take
a while,
so let's clear out a rehearsal
space.
Wait!
We can't do that in here!
Lunch is in an hour.
We need a three dimensional
sketchpad
where artists can take risks,
fail,
and ultimately bear their open
wounds
to the healing salve of artistic
creation.
Oh, we need a room with some
open space to move around.
Oh!
Yes, that makes more sense.
That's what I said.
Well, what about the Tankhouse?
The what?
It used to be the storeroom
for the lodge,
but then the raccoons invaded,
so now
I just use it as my Aquavit
distillery.
Oh, I know that smell.
I squatted in here for a few
moons.
Painted some self-portraits to
keep me company.
I didn't have a mirror.
They're very nice.
All human progress has been in
pursuit of comfort.
Well guess what?
Comfort is the enemy of
creation.
Therefore, partner off.
One of you bend over, the other
vigorously
knead your partner's tailbone.
Get some real pressure in there.
Try a fist.
I have a passion for the
technical side of theater.
Absolutely definitely not
the in-front-of-people side of
theater.
So this is pretty much my worst
nightmare.
Nina!
Speak the speech.
Can I please just take notes?
It'll be so easy.
The wonderful thing about Tucker
and me is we're always on
- The same page.
- The same page.
Mmm, yes, very often we are
thinking.
- The same thoughts.
- The same thing.
Whoa, nice, we got a couple
of naturals over here.
Thank you.
How does that feel?
My buddy came to visit North
Dakota the other day
and he was complaining about the
cold.
And I said what'd you expect?
It's got "coat" right in the
name!
Ha!
I want you to be.
- Slippery as a noodle.
- Stiff as a board.
Perfect technique.
Lovely pressure.
The point, the point.
There you go, really dig in
there.
Geez Leah, ow.
I'm Leah.
I'm the founder of the militant
wing
of Fargo's women's alliance The
Pink Panthers.
Every month I bleed in a cycle,
I howl at the moon!
Like a bolt of lighting!
Swimming in noodles-
Shooting up your spine-
Whether 'tis nobler...
I didn't really fit in as a kid.
The more I got into history,
the more I realized my true
identity.
I am the reincarnated Sweyn
Forkbeard.
And the Tankhouse is a great
outlet for my warrior
tendencies.
Okay, all right, let's go
over this one more time.
It's called "stage combat" so
that
you don't actually have to hit
me.
See, you did it again...
Take five!
I think we're really getting
somewhere.
Ever since my ill-fated attempt
at DIY laser eye surgery,
I have mastered the scent-driven
lifestyle.
I am the master of my body in
space!
Watch out, watch out!
My mead!
That was a choice.
You've got no idea what I'm
feeling
Every time I'm with you, so
hard to be near you
Heart beats-
Why'd you stop singing?
I don't sing without the music.
Well let's see what happens
if you do.
It's easier if you pick a
partner.
Heart beats two times quicker
when I see you
We don't feel like equals
I just mean I'm here and
you're way up there
You're a special type so rare
You look in my eyes, I
scare...
And scene.
You're so tight.
Excuse me, this is an active art
zone.
Oh, sorry.
I heard there was an audition
here?
Sandy.
It's me.
Mackenzie.
I was a freshman when you were a
senior at Fargo High.
When you were Fantine in Les Mis
I was starving prisoner number
two.
We actually swapped mics after I
died in the first scene.
Yes!
Kenzie!
Oh yeah.
I'd always have to go off
looking for you.
You were usually huddled away in
some corner with Hank.
You guys were so cute.
Well thanks for coming in today.
Don't just skulk there like a
street urchin.
State your credentials.
Oh.
Mackenzie Billingham.
CCM class of 2021.
BFA musical theater with a
concentration on acting.
Musical theater "acting?"
More like musical theater
schmacting.
I've actually been
specializing in sense memory.
So I've been reading up on Lee.
Who's Lee?
- Strasberg!
- Strasberg!
Lee Strasberg, the founder of
the method.
The method?
Isn't that what killed that
Joker guy?
Yes.
That's how you knew he was doing
it correctly.
Okay.
Let's see how sensitive your
memory really is.
Okay.
I'm in a hallway and...
I can smell my grandma's chicken
soup.
Mmm.
I can hear the gentle summer
rain hitting the skylight.
I'm walking past the dark wooden
door.
With the brass handle carved by
my grandpa Sven.
I'm not sure you carve brass.
Go on.
Open it.
No.
No, I can't.
It's always locked, that's my
dad's office.
You know where the key is
hidden don't you?
It's in the fern next to the
door.
Grab it.
Open it.
I don't want to.
- Open it!
- Open it!
It's my dad!
Fucking our tennis coach Jim!
I hate you!
I hate you dad, screw you!
- Yes!
- Well done, dear.
It's always those locked doors.
You guys are sick.
I wanna go next.
That was amazing.
Brilliant.
So what do we call ourselves?
Pst!
The Tankhouse Theater.
Their leader, Tucker, says he
wants to start
some sort of a theatrical
revolution.
Oh please.
He's all hat and no cattle.
Fargoans are gonna see through
him
like long johns in a
thunderstorm.
No.
No, they're good.
They got me emotional.
I'm never actually emotional
onstage.
You can be emotional sometimes.
Okay, thank you.
I mean I don't always believe
you,
but yeah yeah yeah, you're
emotional.
Aww, that's really nice of you.
Just get to the point.
Okay okay.
So they're gonna do something
called an immersive theater
attack
at the farmer's market on
Sunday.
Apparently it's gonna shake this
town to its core.
I'm not gonna let some
foppish dandy
take this theater away from me.
Here's what I want you to do.
I want you to infiltrate the
group,
make yourself indispensable, and
then once
you've earned their trust, just
yank
the carpet right out from under
them.
Mr. Mortenson, call me a
calculator.
'Cause you can count on me.
Did you just say that out loud?
I'm so sorry.
Just get outta here.
Okay, yeah, no, I'm sorry.
Hey Sandy!
Here, let me help you.
No, I really gotta get these
back to the theater.
We're only taking a five for
dinner.
Thank you.
I feel real bad about what
happened
at the bar the other night.
No, don't even worry about it.
No, seriously, not cool on my
part.
You guys seem like you make a
good match.
Well thank you.
I appreciate that.
I was just really pumped to
see you.
You know, my mom had a little
party
to watch your Rookie Badge
episode.
What?
I had like two lines in that.
That's so sweet.
No, seriously, when you told
that cop
the suspect threw the girl's
remains
into the dumpster, I totally
bought it.
So can you still audition for
stuff out here?
How does that work?
Yeah, I mean kinda.
I can self-tape for stuff.
Actually, I just ran into this
agent guy in New York.
He said he'd started sending me
out more.
But who knows about that, you
know?
Whoa.
That's awesome.
Yeah.
Yeah, I guess it is kinda cool.
Well, thank you.
This is my stop.
Hey, if you ever need help
with all that,
Let me know.
Thank you.
As long as you thank me in
your Oscar speech.
If I had a nickel for every
time someone asked me that.
Okay, I'll see you.
Yup, okay.
Break a leg!
Thanks!
Five, six, seven, eight.
Yup.
Okay, that's not it at all.
That's okay.
Just lift up your hands like
this.
Mackenzie.
So after some reflection, I
think that we should
make the truth you spoke about
your father
the centerpiece of our
performance on the morrow, hmm?
Oh.
Oh I love that idea.
I'm so ready to share that with
the world.
Yeah, me too, but it is a
great responsibility.
Do you think you can execute?
You can count on me.
Like a calculator.
Oh.
Uh-uh-uh, director eats first!
And antibacterial hand wipes.
Please take one.
Titania.
Come in Titania, are the players
in position?
Oberon, everyone is in
position except Mackenzie.
She hasn't checked in yet
and I don't see her anywhere.
We should do it now.
Lydia's here, she's the head
judge of the competition.
Where is Mackenzie?
I don't know.
Don't worry about McKenzie.
She's the most professional of
the bunch.
Well everyone else is in place.
Good work, Titania.
Oberon out.
Ladies and gentlemen!
My name is Tucker Charlemagne.
And I'm afraid I have some
terrible news.
There's been a murder!
Over there!
Come with me.
Follow!
Quickly!
Townsfolk, stay on my heels!
Just around this vehicle.
No!
Oh my goodness!
What a disaster!
But look, she's still alive.
Beloved, who did this to you?
It was...
It was him!
He's getting away!
I can find him!
Quick, lead us.
But I am weak.
Catch me.
You there.
What can I do?
I'm just a kid.
Play that piano like her life
depends on it.
Okay.
What an authentic expression of
care.
I'm no expert, but authenticity
seems to strengthen him.
That way!
Oh my god.
Well if you don't want me to
be anorexic.
Shh fourth wall-
Hey come on, let's go!
That way!
Come on everybody, let's go!
This way, let's go, let's go.
Inside, thank you, inside.
There's the beast!
I have killed your precious art!
My power is greater than ever
and there's
nothing you can do as stop me!
Oh god!
There's no hope.
How can we ever save art?
Bringing him down will take
a truth bomb of epic
proportions!
Yes.
Yes.
Yes!
Quickly, does anyone have a
truth that needs
to be spoken that hasn't been
given voice before?
Do you have a...
What about you?
Come on, a secret, a truth?
Come on, please, anyone, anyone.
Do you have a truth?
Please, anybody.
Anybody, a truth?
What about...
You!
I say, a truth that hasn't been
spoken!
Nothing about a dad?
Tennis coach?
A door? okay.
Okay.
All right, very well.
I shall do this myself.
From the dawn of time-not right
now.
From the dawn of time,
No, but if it's all the same
to you,
there is a pretty big truth that
I,
we, would like to get off our
chest.
Dude, not now.
Seriously.
It is going to be okay.
Brady!
I promise.
Hey, what's going on here,
kiddo?
Dear town!
Jack and I.
We're together.
You guys.
Called that.
Die.
It's gonna be okay.
Oh yes.
Art is truth brought to life,
and the truth shall set you
free!
Beloved, how amazing!
What an unmitigated disaster.
Darling, it turned out better
than what we had planned.
Let's just go back to the ranch,
have a bacchanal, and move
forward okay?
Wait, I'm confused.
That was amazing, right guys?
Did you hear the applause?
Yeah, the crowd loved it.
No!
If we don't have artists
committed
to our work, then what do we
have?
Hey!
What happened to you?
You really thought I'd join
your group of misfits?
That was cute back there!
I wouldn't call it theater, per
se.
More like a prank really.
You two gathered to conspire
against us?
Good luck to you, Kenzie.
Have fun in a dance studio
conforming for the rest of your
life.
The way I see it, you're like
the boy who cried wolf.
Your little trick can only last
for so long.
People will catch on.
And when they do, you can kick
and scream and prank all you
want.
No one will listen.
Mr. Mortenson, what happened
to you?
You used to be such a
sweetheart.
Sandy, you had such promise
in the day, come join us.
You don't belong with these
people.
No way.
There's no way she would
sully her lily white
hands with your crowd-pleasing
drivel.
Drivel, I know that one.
All right.
Let's settle this right now.
A Modern Major General-off.
Just you and me.
Should I get my sword?
I smell trouble brewing.
A Modern Major General-off?
I've never seen one in real
life.
What's a Modern Major
General-off?
"I Am the Very Model of a
Modern Major-General"
is the fastest song in the
English language canon.
Major General-offs have been
illegal since two
RSC members tried it in 1984 and
broke their jaws.
Betrothd, let me do this.
No darling, this is extremely
perilous.
I know.
He taught me the part in high
school.
I can beat him.
Come on!
We gonna do this or what?
I love you.
Wait.
En garde.
I am the very model of a
modern Major-General
I've information vegetable,
animal, and mineral
I know the kings of England
And can quote the fights
historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in
order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too,
with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both
the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorems I'm
teeming with a lot of news
With many cheerful facts
About the square of the
hypotenuse
Come on!
You got this.
Go get him.
I'm very good at integral and
differential calculus
I know the scientific names of
beings animalculous
In short, in matters
vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a
modern Major-General
And that, my friends, is how
you operetta, acapella!
It's too fast.
No, he's too fast.
It's okay.
In fact, when I know what is
meant by mamelon and ravelin
When I can tell at sight a
Mauser rifle from a javelin
When such affairs as sorties
And surprises I'm more wary at
And when I know precisely what
is meant by commissariat
Sandy please, be reasonable.
For my military knowledge
Though I'm plucky and
adventury
Has only been brought down
To the beginning of the
century
But still, in matters
vegetable, animal, and mineral
I am the very model of a
modern Major-General!
Please, please.
To the ranch!
Damn theater kids.
Oh yeah, this is sick.
Wait a minute.
You have to realize that if you
would've just let me
compete against Morten I
would've beat him.
Well after that monumental
cock-up
during our performance it's
become apparent
to me that I have to do
everything myself.
Then why have an ensemble?
God, you're so controlling
sometimes.
You call it controlling, I
call it directing.
The play was great without
Mackenzie.
No.
Yeah, sometimes things don't
go according to plan,
and then you work around them
and they end up being fine.
Stop being such a mule.
I'm being authentic to the
craft, 'Drene.
If you let things slide, next
thing
you know we're doing a gender
specific
production of The Sound of
Music.
Don't!
I just can't handle any more
betrayal, capiche?
Oh geez!
What?
Sorry.
It's locked.
We can't get in.
You have a key to the barn?
Yes, I have the keys.
Come on in, you guys.
I smell hay!
Mi casa es su casa.
I have water.
I've never been around underage
drinking before.
All right everyone, I wanna
make an announcement.
Thank you.
Beloved.
I just want to raise a goblet to
these two beautiful boys.
Planning that surprise was the
perfect example of risk.
Well we didn't plan it.
Congratulations to all!
Drink up!
Skol!
I love fruit punch!
Look bonbon, I think we
should agree to disagree.
I don't wanna fight with you.
I love you.
Let's just have fun tonight,
okay?
Drink up.
Okay.
If you're ever going
to discover the true purpose of
theater,
you must have this experience.
It is absolutely not a thing.
What do you, explain your
point with words please.
When you're dancing with the
lighting,
and dancers, and your lighting
with dancers,
you wanna see their angles and
the bodies and the shapes.
Look, poppet.
Huh?
The group is really starting
to "cohese."
Yes, it's like they're
melting together
like a Croque Monsieur.
You mad?
Did you consider maybe I
didn't wanna
come out to the whole farmer's
market?
But what are you so worried
about, man?
I mean your mom?
Dude, she was totally happy.
That's 'cause everyone was
watching.
This town is mad conservative,
dude.
You have no idea.
I do though.
Don't do that.
Boys, what is doing on over
here huh?
Nothing like a little
showmance to spice up the gumbo.
Did we ever tell you about
the first time
that Sandrene and I made love?
Why do you guys smell like
garlic?
It was a cast party just like
this one.
Just let me out first.
Just let me out first!
Yeah, hi.
Can I get 10 extra large with
zucchini flowers if you have it?
Oh.
Mr. Marlow.
Is that a scimitar or are you
just happy to see me?
Brian, hey.
A self-tape?
Really?
Yeah.
No, I'm in Fargo.
Yeah, it comes out sometimes.
Yeah, okay.
I'll get it in immediately.
Okay perfect.
Great, bye.
Rise and shine!
Ideokinesis on the porch!
Everybody up!
Ideokinesis is an intimate
technique that opens
the energy centers around the
pelvic floor.
Ooh yeah, that's good.
Trust the process, children.
Oh Brady, look what you did.
Oh my god, no!
I'm done with this!
All right, calm down
everybody, calm down.
I know it's wet, I know it's
cold, all right?
But we're gonna do a couple more
sacrum scrubs and then it's back
to town.
Darling, look.
The Squire.
All the way from New York City?
Ah.
Good Squire.
What news bring you?
Hear ye, hear ye!
I come bearing tragic news!
It is with great sorrow that I
inform you that
Buford Schlesinger, the honored
artistic director
of the Artist's Atelier, after
his decades-long
battle with gout, has passed
away!
No no no no no!
No!
Buford!
No!
Buford!
Why?
I don't know what this is
about right now.
Rehearsals dismissed!
I'm sorry, but we kinda got a
ride with you...
Get another ride!
Absolutely, totally understand.
We'll figure it out.
Why take it
It is thine
Again.
I can't, Mr. Mortenson.
I've done it a thousand times.
Again please!
I'm literally dying up here,
I can't do this anymore!
You're dying?
From singing a song?
Get her outta here.
Get her smelling salts for all I
care.
Hey!
Lisa, Ashley, what the hell are
you doing?
I told you, no cell phones in
the rehearsal space.
Why don't we ever get to
massage each other?
What the hell are you talking
about?
Brady is posting them all at
the Tankhouse cast party.
It looks so fun.
I'm so jealous.
All of their warmups are
clothing optional.
Theater is about hard work.
Precision.
Pain.
It's not some bordello.
Well maybe if you had more fun
you wouldn't have lost the
Major-General off.
Excuse me?
Just doing a tongue stretch.
Well it won't be fun when I
show Captain Mikkelsen this.
Oh Buford!
Why would you leave me here?
Pretty cool getting to be a
part of the movie magic.
Hope I can do uh... "Logan"
justice.
Yeah, hold on, sorry.
The lighting is perfect right
now,
so if we could just get started
'cause they're casting this off
the tape.
And it's for the CW, so I need
to look CW-ish.
Whoa!
CW.
Are you gonna be a sexy witch or
a sexy werewolf?
I'm kidding.
Okay, let's get going.
Tucker's guru just died and I
need to hold
the bucket for him while he
purges his grief.
Wait.
Does he know you're here?
Tuck really hates network
television.
He thinks it's "lulling the
masses into a stupor"
"while they get disenfranchised
by the ruling class."
Or something.
I know he's a lot, and I know
you don't
understand him, but he's
passionate
and ambitious and driven and
we...
Need each other.
But you can't be honest with
each other?
You always told me that your big
dream was to be on TV.
It was.
It is.
Well.
Is Tucker a part of that dream?
Come here come here come here.
Thank you so much.
You're the best.
Okay.
Pauline.
Whoa!
Morten, what are you doing
hiding down there
like a pregnant possum in a
pumpkin patch?
What has gotten into you?
Seems like everyone around here
is losing
their right minds over this
competition.
Something I wanna show you.
Huh?
Oh.
Did you sleep at all last
night, darling?
I'm not sure.
I took about eight Melatonin at
5 AM.
I just can't stop thinking about
the last thing that Buford ever
said to me.
I was to find the true purpose
of theater.
Well we've brought people
together
and helped them find their
voices as artists.
And our final performance can be
a place
to showcase what makes our
ensemble so special.
No.
No?
No.
Buford sent me here to redefine
theater as we know it.
Oh is that what he said?
And these people will be the
raw materials
with which I craft my
masterpiece!
Tucker, you're getting
carried away.
Hey Tucker?
Yorick and I have been
channeling our rage
into this really cool stage
combat sequence
that we think would be great for
the finale.
Ooh, and I can't wait to try
out my crowd work.
Thank you all for your
suggestions,
but they will not be necessary.
Tucker.
I've been very clear with you
all from the outset.
Our mission here is to create a
theatrical revolution
so that I may take my rightful
place
at the apex of the avant-garde.
Now Buford's death, I'm sorry,
confirms.
That my time is now.
So, like, we've all never
been totally sure who Buford is?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
That's very funny.
Ladies and gentlemen, there
comes a point
in every artist's journey where
he, or she,
must take a step back from
creating their own work
and take part in the equally
fulfilling task
of executing other people's
instructions!
Ha.
I'm sorry, Nina.
Something humorous?
That's exactly what Morton
said when I demoed
my take for the lighting design
of Pirates.
Yes dear, weren't you the one
that teased them about
conforming?
No.
No no, no no no no no no, that
is completely different.
Look, this is not a debate.
You will all execute my
instructions,
we will win that theater, and
that is final!
- Whoa!
- Hey!
What happened?
No one leaves this room until
I am satisfied!
My phone is charging in the bar
My mom is gonna wonder where I
am.
This is a fire hazard.
What are we going to eat?
There's no food in here.
There's plenty of Aquavit.
Eww.
Ugh.
Faster!
Faster faster faster!
Slower slower slower!
One hand fast, the other slow!
That one's fast, that one's
slow!
Go go go!
'Drene are you getting this?
Yes.
Okay, fast, slow, fast!
The sun burns.
Oh my god, it's 9:55.
We have five minutes to get
there.
Tucker, you weren't keeping
track of the time?
I didn't hear the lark.
Did you hear the lark?
I'm gonna use the slingshot.
No no no, I think we decided on
the North Korean style movement
piece with the streamers.
I hear footsteps.
Did we decide live horse
or a dead horse?
Hello?
Where is everyone?
Does somebody have any
mouthwash?
Hello, is this Jax Winn?
Yeah, hello, this is Captain
Pauline Mikkelsen
of the Fargo PD, I just had a
question for you
about an immersive theater
performance.
Lydia.
Oh hi, nice to see you.
Whoa!
What are you whispering about?
Do you need tampons?
'Cause I have those.
No, I...
Do you need Extra Plus?
I have that too.
No no, I only use pads.
Tucker, you changed your mind
30,000 times last night.
Now nobody has any idea what's
going on and everyone
thinks your masterpiece is gonna
be a disaster.
And now, ladies and gents,
please welcome to the stage the
Red River Players.
For I am a pirate king
You are, hurrah for the pirate
king
And it is, it is a glorious
thing
To be a pirate king
Poor wand'ring one
Though thou hast surely
strayed
Take heart of grace
Thy steps retrace
Poor wand'ring one
Are they good?
Poor wand'ring one
If such a poor heart as mine
Can help thee find
True peace of mind
Why take it
It is
Thine
Say something.
Well wasn't that something?
Group, comrades, quickly gather.
Up next, let's give it up
for The Tankhouse Theater.
Just remember to...
Commit to the text and
everything will be fine.
There's no text.
Places!
- From the dawn of time!
- How dare you!
I've been cuckolded before
mine own eyes.
Ah yes, the eye of the play!
'Drene!
How could you do this to me?
Beloved, what in the devil?
What is happening?
This is part of their whole
"thing."
Don't act like you don't know
what I'm talking about.
Know what?
That you've been cheating on
me with Hank!
Salacious!
Okay, I wasn't cheating on you,
but can we please talk about
this...
I trusted you!
We weren't cheating.
Now you're going to lie?
He was helping me with a
self-tape.
A.
Self.
Tape.
I can never forgive you.
What's a self-tape?
Well I'm sorry, but it's for
a new CW show.
It's between me and one other
girl
and I find out any minute if I
got it.
Sorry, what's happening?
The CW, it's like, real TV.
Wow!
Are you gonna be a sexy witch?
Or a sexy werewolf?
Oh my god, Sandrene, you have
to come on my podcast when
you're famous.
Yeah, I'm sure all 13 of your
listeners would love that,
Brady.
Okay Jack.
Can we stop this?
I love you, okay?
I love you!
Oh, oh, oh!
You have a missed call!
Ooh-hoo, it's from 2-1-2.
I'm dialing.
Here, here.
Hey Brian.
Yeah.
What?
What?
You're kidding!
Oh my god!
Oh my god.
I got the part!
I got it!
I got the part!
Yeah!
No no no no, stop stop stop
stop!
Sandrene, you're not gonna do it
right?
What?
Think about our artistic
revolution.
Tucker.
Tucker, this is all I ever
wanted.
It's the opportunity of a
lifetime.
They're literally flying me out
tomorrow morning.
I can't believe you're gonna
be on the CW.
This is so amazing.
No.
It's not amazing.
It's betrayal.
Ensemble.
And.
I guess, audience.
I'm afraid I have an
announcement to make.
Sandrene is no longer a member
of the Tankhouse.
She was too busy selling out.
Truly typical, Tucker.
You hide behind your art, but
you
wish you had these
opportunities.
And it kills you to see others,
especially me, get them!
'Cause you think you're better
than everyone else!
And you're not.
You're not.
Heaven truly knows that thou
art false as hell.
How am I false?
Leave her alone!
Sandrene needs a real man.
Oh no no no, Hankery, take her!
You can be happy little hayseeds
together.
You, we, are done!
Great!
Then you can just swiftly move
out of my parents' ranch,
which you've been staying in by
the way, for free!
"Free" is...
Did you even send my mother a
thank you note?
If I hear about these thank
you notes one more time...
Everyone just shut up!
We dedicated our time and effort
to this company because we
believed in you two!
And now look at you!
You're childish and you're
selfish
and you don't care about art!
I am resetting for top of show
and we are trying this again!
Okay?
Oh, that must be it.
Look, they're clapping.
Why are they clapping?
Wow.
How much fun was that?
Let's give it up for The
Tankhouse Theater.
Stop!
Stop!
Is this part of it too?
I don't know.
I have sworn testimony
confirming
Tucker Charlemagne and Sandrene
Rothstein's
prohibition from performing in
New York.
Due to their negligence leading
to the death of an audience
member
during one of their
performances.
No one implicated in a felony
can take possession of a city
landmark.
They cannot win the theater.
Please.
Shire Reeve, I implore you.
In good conscience I can't
let you corrupt my son,
or these people, for one more
minute.
I'm the corrupter?
I shared my gifts with you
yokels!
Pearls suckled from the teat of
America's
theatrical breast, New York
City!
You heard of it?
It's not my fault if these
bumpkins
can't grasp the grandeur I'm
giving them!
Tucker, control thyself!
And thank you, Sandy Rothstein,
for teaching me that success
only comes
when you toss aside those you
care about most
in the pursuit of your own
selfish purposes.
Well consider yourself tossed.
Well in light of this
news, I guess
we have no other option but to
award
the Fargo Theater to the Red
River Players.
Oofta.
Oh my god.
I cannot believe the Tankhouse
people
are full on psycho murderers.
I wonder who tipped off Captain
Pauline.
Oh my god.
It was you.
Mr. Mortenson, I love that.
Shh.
Just keep your voice down.
This is nothing to be proud of.
Well then why did you do it?
You have your whole life
ahead of you.
Endless possibilities.
All I have is a past filled with
missed opportunities.
And a present that I'm working
very hard to make tolerable.
I'm sorry, I didn't realize
that...
What?
That I'm not through dreaming?
Tucker!
Uther, what are you doing here?
What are you doing here?
I'm done!
I'm going to let this river
carry me northward
to Canadia where I will start
anew amongst the moose.
Tucker, do you know why I
keep my glasses on?
Yes, it was after a failed
corrective eye surgery
that you did on yourself with a
laser pointer.
Bah, that's just the party line.
In truth, my eyes work.
What?
They can reveal things in
people.
I can't control it.
And the emotional burden is...
It's too much for me.
So I keep myself blinded.
Most people aren't ready for the
truth.
I'm ready for my truth.
I know.
Have I told you about
my production of A Doll's House?
Our first adaptation was devised
in the jungles of Siberia.
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
I just feel so guilty and
ungrateful
and just a total asshole.
Leaving all these people that I
love and care about.
Look.
If they really love you, they'll
understand
that you've gotta follow your
dreams.
And if they don't, then it
sounds to me
like they got some growing up to
do.
You are the most talented person
I've ever met.
Wow.
That was so crazy.
Yeah.
I've been waiting for so long
for a sign.
For some reason for me to get
out of here and this is it.
I can come with you, I'll make
your place a home.
You're gonna be so busy and you
need stability.
Well...
I can cook.
I can clean, I can take care of
you.
Hell, maybe I can even figure
out
the music scene in New York
City.
Okay, Hank, Hank, hi.
No.
This is my journey.
And if I have learned anything
it's that
I can't have someone depending
on me to give their life
meaning.
Okay?
Yeah.
Guys guys guys!
Okay.
Uther, how did you get here?
Uber.
Oh.
Didn't know they had that.
Look, I just, I wanted to say
that I am,
I'm so sorry for all the
horrible
eloquently-worded things that I
said earlier.
I've come to the realization
that...
I now understand the true
purpose of theater.
It's about community, you know?
And bringing people closer.
Trying to figure out this crazy
life together.
And I wanna be here.
I wanna be a part of your
family.
Your community.
No thanks, I think we're all
set.
Yeah.
I'm gonna help Yorick get his
distilling license
so that he can sell his
moonshine legally.
Proceeds will go to Tankhouse.
What?
Wait, what?
We are turning Tankhouse into
our permanent theater.
That's.
Amazing.
If you could just find a place
for me here,
I would be eternally grateful.
You know, someone once told
me a stage
is where you arrive, not where
you begin.
If you want to join us.
You'll have to audition.
Just like everyone else?
Just like everyone else.
Yes.
Okay.
Sign me up.
Oi!
Everyone!
To Tankhouse!
Patrons: To Tankhouse!
Tankhouse.
Ooh!
I am so sorry.
Tonight is our opening night of
"Art Assault"
An immersive show that we've
been
working on the past few weeks.
I was given a more
instrumental part
in the production since Sandrene
had to leave to shoot her show.
It was a little awkward at first
because Tucker kept forgetting I
wasn't Sandrene.
I'll take care of it.
Whoa!
I forgot.
I heard she's coming to the
show tonight.
Yeah, we're back together.
Boing!
On one condition.
Our one rule is I'm not
really supposed
to talk about him in my standup,
so.
Yeah.
So I'm hanging with my
girlfriend
the other day, sucking her dick.
Future mother-in-law everybody.
Give it up for Pauline, police
captain.
We weren't able to get the
licensing
for my moonshine, but we were
able to use
the equipment to make a cologne
designed by Uther.
Turns out his crazy sense of
smells does come in handy.
We got it in all the duty frees!
So since the competition I've
taken over as technical
director.
That's why it's so neat in here.
After some self-reflection,
and Leah sitting me down
and explaining to me how I'm
part of "the problem,"
I decided I needed to take a
step back
from leadership for a while.
So I demoted myself to squire.
Scroll for you, sir!
Thank you, good sir.
Good day!
This is why we have spell check.
Oh.
So I've been taking an
experimental acting class at CCM.
So I had to come see Art
Assault.
Once I confronted my dad about
the whole
sense memory exercise, he
finally came out to me.
But yeah, he and Jim should be
here any second.
Beat the chest!
King Kong the chest, yes.
Sandrene?
Hey guys!
How are you?
I missed you so much!
You looks so pretty.
You really got that CW glow.
I've missed you guys.
We've missed you too.
I love your romper.
Let's all take five in the
antechamber, huh?
Take me, thank you.
I just wanted to give them a
little space.
Actually it's time to
hydrate, guys.
Hi.
Hey 'Drene.
I was just counting the chairs
for the...
How's the show?
Good, good, yeah, really good.
Great actually.
Jack, he's really come out of
his shell.
Leah has a beautiful movement
piece
about cryptic pregnancies that
came to her
in a dream actually, so yeah,
it's great.
Look at you giving the actors
freedom.
It's nice.
What about you?
How's your... show?
It's great.
We just finished filming the
first two episodes.
Learning a lot.
The cast is cool.
Are you gonna go see Hank
after this, or...
What?
No.
No, Tucker.
He's just trying to find himself
Like the rest of us.
I'm really happy though.
I hope you are too.
I really do miss you.
Oh hey, Tucker?
Ah, Nina.
What news bring you?
Sorry, it's just we have to
open the house now.
It's company members only.
Oh my god, of course.
Break a leg, you guys.
All right guys, places!
'Cause I'm still not used
To being not used to you
Hello?
Where is everyone?
Uther.
Welcome.
Come on in.
Feel free to sit wherever you'd
like.
Welcome.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Beware!
But enjoy.
Thank you.
Well hello, ladies.
You brought your own instrument
huh?
Come on in, welcome, thank you
for coming.
The chairs for the agd are just
inside, Captain.
Good.
Immersive Theater Attack!
It feels like I betray
When I can't make it okay
That I've gone away
Now I've become your problems
I can't solve them
Make a fool of those you claim
Tell them you'll stay the same
When you know you'll change
You can't not change