Thanks for the Memory (1938) Movie Script

Thanks for the memory
Of candlelight and wine
Castles on the Rhine
Lovely it was
How're you doing, Steve?
Pretty good for a guy
with a marcel on his nose.
I love you, dear,
marcel and all.
Yeah, and I love you, honey.
Even at the risk
of cutting my own throat.
Darling, do you realize
we've been married
three months today?
Yeah.
Who says marriages don't last?
Ouch.
There it is. I got it.
Why don't you use a new blade?
No, sir, I'm stubborn.
This blade was good enough
for my father,
and it's good enough for me.
Oh, uh, come to think of it,
I had a new blade
here yesterday.
Well, if it's gone,
I'll bet Skinny Kincaid took it.
What would Skinny Kincaid
be doing with my blade?
He shaved here yesterday.
- Oh, he shaved here yesterday?
- Uh-huh.
Good old Skinny.
I bet he was pie-eyed.
Isn't he always?
Still, I don't think Skinny
would walk off with my blade.
Oh, of course not.
Skinny drinks our liquor,
sponges our food,
walks off with
our cigarettes and matches,
but I'm sure
he wouldn't stoop to blades.
Was he alone?
No. He was with an appraiser.
- An appraiser?
- Uh-huh.
What would he want
with an appraiser up here?
He was trying to borrow
some money on our furniture.
Crazy guy.
Pretty soon he'll be squawking
because my suits don't fit him.
You know, Anne,
between you and me,
that mob is getting
slightly on my nerves.
They're here day
and night enjoying
the good old
Merrick hospitality.
Why there are so many of them
practically living here
with us now, it looks like
a federal housing project.
Is that the phone?
Sounds like it.
Hurry up, will you, darling?
First thing you know,
some of our pals
will be drifting in,
and then we'll never get away.
Yeah.
Wish I had the hat-checking
concession in this place.
Hello?
No, I'm sorry to say I don't.
No, not tonight.
We're going out.
- Who was that?
- Bert Monroe.
Bert Monroe? Who's he?
Don't ask me.
How on earth do we happen
to know so many funny people?
Now don't lay it on me.
They wouldn't come here
the way they do
if you weren't
so blamed charming.
Ah.
- Let me answer this one.
- Thanks, dear.
Hello?
No, Mr. Merrick,
he not home now.
No, Mr. Merrick, he out dancing.
Yeah. He do flat-foot
floo-jeep on the floor-floor.
No, no, flat-foot floo-jeep
on the floor-floor.
Oh, no. Could not do that.
No. No.
Not with the floor-floor.
Yeah. You go, too. Yeah. Yeah.
Just another jitterbug
looking for a home.
Gee, you look pretty.
Do I, Steve?
Listen, Anne, when I
think of any other woman...
What I mean to say is I don't.
90 days married
and still dealing out romance.
Nin... 90 days? Gee.
It seems longer than that.
Oh, it does?
Sure, you know when
you're happy and contented,
why, you just forget
all about time.
Say, I'm so contented now,
if I was a cow,
all I'd give would be cream.
Oh, now, who's that?
Let him knock again.
The landlord.
Let's surprise him
and open the door.
The only thing he'll get
here today is practice.
Oh! How do you do,
Mr. Flanahan?
How do you do,
Mr. and Mrs. Merrick?
My, what a small world.
Imagine meeting you at our door.
Well, folks, I was just passing,
and I said to myself,
"Well, why not drop in
and see the Merricks?"
Well, we're glad you did,
Mr. Flanahan.
It saves us going out.
Yes. It saves us going out.
You know, I'll bet you came up
about the rent.
Yes, sir, if at first
you don't succeed,
try, try again.
Won't you come in, Mr. Flanahan?
- Yes, do come in. We'll talk about it.
- Wait a minute.
I don't wanna hear
any more fairytales.
I saw "Snow White,"
and I'm very happy.
I'd like to have my money.
Oh, yeah, well,
that's what we wanna talk
to you about, Mr. Flanahan,
about the money.
There was a little trouble
about my last check clearing
and we'd like to have you
play ball with us
for a couple of more days.
Listen, I've been playing
ball with you so long,
I got a charley horse
in my right arm.
Oh, I know, but after all,
money isn't everything,
Mr. Flanahan.
You know,
that's what I like about you.
You're so darn nice
about everything.
You know, truthfully,
you oughta relax a little more.
Take things easy.
You know the old saying,
"All work and no Jack
"makes hay while the..." or it's,
"All hay and no Jack with..."
what is that thing, Anne?
I've got it.
"All work and no play
keeps the doctor away."
That's it!
He thought I was...
Oh, the door. Yeah.
I'll get the door.
Package for Mr. Merrick.
Oh, thanks.
Uh, pair of shoes I bought.
Hey, wait a minute.
That's collect!
Well, you don't have
to get nasty about it.
$5.35.
$5.35.
There ought to be a home
for boys like you.
Uh, $5.35, honey.
Hey, I want my money.
Are you any relation to him?
$5.35.
Have you change
for a $20, Mr. Flanahan?
Any way at all will do.
Just break...
Well, that ten will be fine.
That's charming.
Thank you. Here's ten, son.
- Yes, sir, here's your change.
- And here's a dollar for you.
- Oh, thank you!
- What's money?
Just add that onto the rent,
Mr. Flanahan.
Now, where were we?
It was, "All work and no Jack... ".
Say, I gave you $10.
Oh, I know you did.
And I'll fix that for you.
You just lend me your pen
and I'll make it out
for you right now.
Now, how do you spell
your name, Mr. Flanahan?
Flanahan. F-L-A-N-A-H-A-N.
Oh, just plain like that, eh?
I see.
That's F-L-A-N-A-H-A-N.
Now, that's 40
for the rent and ten.
That's 50. Is that right?
- That's right.
- $50. Yes. I see.
"I owe you $50."
You know,
I could give you a check,
but you couldn't put it
through for a couple of years,
so this is probably much better.
Here you are, Mr. Flanahan.
This just proves that one should
never worry about a thing.
Everything comes out
all right in the end.
Wait a minute.
I got enough of these
things to start a fire.
Yeah, why didn't you
think of that last winter
when we didn't have
enough heat in this place?
Goodbye, Mr. Flanahan.
Happy times.
You know, that Flanahan
is sure a nice guy.
Say, and a nice pen.
I ought to get
at least a dollar on it.
Hurry up, darling, will you?
We'll be late.
Don't you think it's about time
you tell me where we're dining?
Can't I surprise you
once in a while?
Honey, there isn't a day
that passes
that you don't surprise me.
Now, come clean.
Well, you've heard me
speak of Gil Morrell.
Gil Morrell?
Oh, isn't he the guy
that used to go for you?
What do you mean, "used to"?
Oh, go on.
Well, I ran into him last week.
Oh, I suppose he just
happened to be passing.
Hold this for me, darling.
Yeah.
Uh, what about this Gil Morrell?
I told him about your novel.
Well, you had your nerve.
More than that.
I gave it to him to read.
Well, I've only
finished ten chapters.
So he said,
"Bring the poor sap to dinner,
and we'll talk about it."
Well, aren't you pleased?
Pleased? I'm tickled pink.
Oh, Steve, won't it be
wonderful to be rich?
Yeah, then we can walk
by the finance company again
without trying
to look nonchalant.
And you can give up
your pint-sized job
and we'll move
out of this place.
Anne, what's the matter with it?
I like it here.
Oh, so do I, but...
Oh, let me handle it.
I'm a wizard at this stuff.
I'll take...
I handle these... I'm a wiz, I...
I can...
Do you get an oil can
with these things?
There it is.
Now I wonder who that is.
I don't know,
but whoever it is, we're out.
I'll say.
Hello. Mr. Merrick, he not...
What?
Mr. and Mrs. Flint
are on their way up.
I told them you wasn't in,
but they don't seem to have
no confidence in me.
Oh.
Thanks. Yeah.
Anne. Oh, Anne.
Who was it?
The Flints.
And they're coming up.
They may be coming up,
but they'll never come in.
Now, get your coat
and follow me.
You know, the last time
they dropped in for a cocktail,
they stayed till breakfast.
Hurry up, Steve.
There they are.
They can ring
till the cows come home.
- We're going down the fire escape.
- Let's go.
- Lights.
- Oh, the lights.
Well, happy landing.
- Be careful.
- Nice knowing you.
Catch it, darling.
I got it.
- All right.
- Okay.
You all right?
Hey! Taxi!
Where to, buddy?
34 Washington Square.
Why, that's only
a few blocks from here.
Why don't you walk it?
Fallen arches.
You don't mind, do you?
No. But I hate to see
any guy throw money away.
Even if he's got it.
That's the trouble
of the whole world today.
Too few people have
any economic balance.
Would you like
to mind your own business?
I wasn't talking to you, buddy.
I... I was thinking out loud.
We'll travel for a year, huh?
London, Paris.
The Riviera.
Monte Carlo.
Monte...
We'll take a little house there.
I'll settle down
to another novel.
I'll raise a family.
Well, you can't raise
much of a family in a year.
You can start one, can't you?
Are you working on a novel?
You heard me.
I just finished one.
You don't tell me!
Who's gonna publish it?
Well, International wants it,
but I don't think they're
the right people to handle it.
I'm consid...
Get out of the way, you lug.
I'm considering giving it
to Consolidated.
Here we are.
Well, goodbye,
my literary friend.
The next time we meet,
I hope we'll both
be famous novelists.
And if you want me to put
a good word in for you
at Consolidated,
just let me know.
- Oh, thanks, I'll need you.
- Yes.
Look at those books.
Funny he hasn't said
anything about mine.
I don't see anything funny
about it, dear.
A man doesn't ask people
to dinner
and then talk nothing but shop.
As soon as he gets through
telephoning
I wish you'd introduce
the subject.
I will.
I'm so sorry.
Shall we go out
and have our coffee?
Oh, fine. I'd love to.
By the way, I don't
think I congratulated you.
- Oh, you mean my novel?
- No, I mean your wife.
A lot of fellas can write,
but few men can get
a girl like Anne.
I ought to know.
She almost married me.
Yeah, I know,
Anne and I have laughed
about that lots of times.
Gil, it's charming.
You like it?
It's not a bit like New York.
That's why I took it.
I can sit out here
and imagine I'm in the country.
Saves me having to commute.
Sit down.
- Thank you.
- Steve?
Well, Gil, what do you think?
I think
it shows unusual promise.
I was sure you'd like it.
The characters
are alive and fresh.
Dialogue fairly crackles.
However...
Will you have a cigarette, Anne?
Oh, thank you.
- Steve?
- Thanks.
- You were saying?
- Oh, yes.
Some of the chapters
are grand, but, um...
Out with it, old man,
I can take it.
Well, after all,
I've only seen 10 chapters.
I have a feeling, Steve,
that you haven't thought it out.
A novel isn't just a loose
collection of chapters,
no matter how good they are.
It should be as carefully
planned as a house,
a house that's gonna be occupied
by a lot of interesting people.
Well, I see what you mean, Gil,
but can you put your finger
on just what's wrong with it?
Yes.
Your story shows great promise
up to chapter nine.
Then it sinks.
It what?
It sinks.
Oh! You had me a little
nervous there for a minute.
When I read a book,
I want to know first of all
what the author's purpose is.
Well, I hate
novels with a purpose.
I almost agree with you.
Still, if an author
hasn't something to say,
why bother to write?
Gil's right, Steve.
How do you work, Steve?
I have a feeling that you
wrote most of those chapters
while running for the subway.
Well, I write nights
and Sundays.
That is...
Lots of friends, I suppose.
Oh, the line forms on the left.
I've always tried
to sell my authors the idea
that writing isn't only an art,
it's a business.
What's your job like?
Oh, just a job.
- Why don't you give it up?
- Give it up?
If I had your talent,
I'd get somebody to stake me,
anybody, and go to it.
Anyhow, I think we better
be going, Anne.
- What, so soon?
- Well, it's after 11:00.
Well, if it's that late,
we must.
I'm afraid I made myself
an awful nuisance.
Oh, no, you've been swell.
Well, let me know how it goes.
I'll be very much interested.
Thanks, Gil,
for a beautiful evening.
Good night.
Thanks for everything.
Thank you.
Will you get me a taxi?
Steve, we're not
going to ride home.
We're not going home.
We're going for a spin.
Uh, do you write novels?
Not me. I work for a living.
Drive us through the park.
Steve, you're not discouraged,
are you?
What about?
He said I could write,
didn't he?
All on earth you need
is an opportunity.
And I'm gonna make it, see?
From now on no more parties.
No more people dropping in
for cocktails.
As soon as we stop serving gin,
we won't have a friend
in the world.
I'm gonna shut myself up
in a shell
and think novel,
eat novel, and drink novel.
Oh, Steve, you're wonderful.
Simply wonderful.
I know it.
Is this the place? I think so.
Say, who do you think you are,
Paul Revere?
Sure. The redcoats are coming!
The redcoats are coming!
Shut up, you durn fool.
Do you wanna get us pinched?
Biney, I haven't enough
money to bail us out.
Don't worry.
Whatever it is,
I don't think we want any.
Uh, Mr. Merrick's
apartment, please.
- You can't go up.
- Why not?
'Cause he ain't at home.
And this time, he really ain't.
Say, now don't be absurd.
He just telephoned me
from his sick bed.
I'm Dr. Axoplanard.
Dr. Axo... oh.
Well, what about
the young lady here?
My nurse.
Well, right this way.
Thank you.
Say, I remember you now.
Last time you got me up
in the middle of the night,
you told me you was a lawyer.
Oh, I gave up the law.
There's no future in it.
That's what I told my brother.
But they still
got him locked up.
Oh, here's a pass to one of
my theaters, made out for two.
You can take your sweetheart.
Oh, but I got a wife.
She don't need to know.
You don't know my wife.
You know, you've got your nerve
breaking into a strange
apartment.
What do you mean strange?
I'll bet anything you don't
even know these people.
I'll bet anything I know
where they keep their gin.
Well, I've got
to write my review.
There's a typewriter.
Help yourself.
Can I use the telephone?
Help yourself.
The place is yours.
Thanks.
No answer, darn it.
Say, I don't like
to use this machine
with somebody else's work in it.
Take it out.
I know,
but these people may be fussy.
Oh, go ahead, take it out.
Here.
Why don't you tear it up
and be done with it?
Oh, it's not mine.
There you are.
Now, I'll dictate
your review for you. Ready?
Shoot.
Hello. How've you been?
Okay.
Anybody home?
Not yet. The liquor's in there.
In there.
Who is that man?
Search me.
Say, what kind of people
are these Merricks?
They're grand, and don't let
anybody tell you different.
What does he do?
Oh, he's got a job
with electrical appliances.
What does she do?
She was a model
before she married Steve.
You mean to say she lets
her husband support her?
Well, she was gonna keep
right on working,
but Steve wouldn't have it.
That you, Kelly?
Six bottles of gin,
the Merrick apartment.
Emergency call.
Say, who's going to pay
for those six bottles?
I don't know. It's not my party.
What'll I do with this?
You ever try swallowing 'em?
Biney!
Oh, I knew a fellow once,
made his living
swallowing lighted cigarettes.
He said it toned up
his digestion.
He finally blew up.
Steve!
Well, George Trent,
you old sinner, how are you?
I can't complain. Why, Anne.
- Hello, George.
- Come on up.
Well, just a minute.
Come along, Sugar.
Sugar?
Some lump.
Anne and Steve,
this is Mrs. Trent.
- How do you do?
- How do you do?
George's mother. Well, well.
I happen to be George's wife.
Oh! Well, those things happen.
I mean, I thought you
looked very young to be...
That's right, you didn't know.
My mistake, I'm sorry.
I should think he would be.
Mercy, who's the dame
in the ermine
with the flock of orchids?
That's Mrs. George.
He married the Stickle million.
My, she must have had
a lot of fun
knitting socks
for the soldiers...
in the Civil War.
Some of the best wine
comes out of old bottles, Polly.
Won't you come up, Mrs. Trent?
No, I'm afraid
it's rather late for that.
Oh, nonsense, Anne, you take
George and Mrs. Trent upstairs,
and I'll run over to Tony's
and get some sandwiches.
Fine, dear.
Come with me, Mrs. Trent.
Oh, Sugar, please.
Well, for a very few minutes.
Biney, darling!
How are you, baby?
Oh, so good to see you again.
Hello. I'm Polly Griscom.
Oh, Biney's talked
a lot about you.
Don't believe him.
It's not true.
- I won't.
- Oh!
One of those
exclusive places, eh?
Who's that?
Hello.
Hello.
The liquor's right in there.
Well, thanks.
- George!
- Biney!
Gee, I'm glad
to see you again, Biney.
Glad to see you, George.
Say, I hear you married
somebody filthy with money.
Well, yes, I... shh!
Hello, George,
haven't seen you for ages.
- Give us a little kiss.
- Swell to see you again, Polly.
Oh, gee.
Well, George.
Yes, Sugar?
Oh, won't you
come in, Mrs. Trent?
Really, George,
I think you might have
waited for me.
I had to climb
that last flight alone.
I don't see how
you ever made it.
George has been a bachelor
so long, he's apt to forget
those little niceties
that mean so much to a woman.
But I expect to change all that.
Yes, I can see a change already.
George, you might introduce me
to your friends.
Yes, Sugar. This is Polly.
George and I
are old pals, missus...
So I've noticed.
And this is Biney.
Well, what about
a little drink, George?
We are not drinking, thank you.
What? George not drinking?
We're not drinking.
We are.
I wish that egg would
get off the phone.
I will, but give me
long distance.
And now he wants long distance.
And now he wan...
I want long distance.
I want to talk
to a girl in Dayton.
Wait right here, George.
I may need you any minute.
Yes, Sugar.
- Hello.
- Sue?
I want Sue.
What are you made up for?
I'm just holding these
for Sugar.
Well, George, how does it feel
to be a kept man?
- Shh!
- Shh!
What's the matter?
- My keeper's in there.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
It's all right.
She's heard the rumor before.
George?
Yes, Sugar?
I want you.
She wants me.
How much did you say
she was worth?
- 16 million.
- It's not enough.
Well, how are you, beautiful?
Hello, angel.
You know, I wouldn't trade you
for 16 times 16 million.
You wouldn't, huh?
Excuse me.
Say, what are we going to do
with that guy?
Just ignore him.
What about some food?
Yes. I can't find a thing
in the icebox.
Sandwiches.
Biney!
How about that show of yours?
- Didn't you open it tonight?
- Yes, and very good.
- Say, do you think it'll run?
- Oh, just a short day.
I hear it's so bad, the actors
hiss the audience for coming.
Yes, they're going
to close next week
and recast the backers.
Oh!
A face! A face!
I distinctly saw a face
peering at me.
You just imagined it, Sugar.
I never use my imagination.
- Oh, it's terrible.
- Oh, hello.
It's terrible.
I'm in such trouble.
I wonder if one of you boys
could help me out.
She's in trouble,
and she wants a boy.
- It's a bat.
- What's a bat?
That awful thing
that flew in my window.
I'm such a baby.
If it got in my hair,
I'd just die.
You'd just die?
I'd just naturally die.
Well, no woman dies
while there's life in my body.
Get your gun, Steve.
Get your things, George.
We're going.
I feel just terrible rushing
in here like this
without being introduced.
My name is Luella Mae Carroll.
My name is
Jefferson Davis Faniere.
Are you any kin
to the Fanieres in Richmond?
- No, just related.
- Oh.
- Come along, George.
- Oh, so soon, Mrs. Trent?
Oh, don't hurry off, folks.
I do wish you all would come in.
I'm so used to a great,
big house full of people.
Thank you so much.
Good night. Good night.
- Good night. Good night.
- Say, look, Steve,
Sugar's giving a yachting
party over the weekend.
Why don't you and Anne
join us in the morning?
Oh, swell, George.
Well, Sugar would love
having you, wouldn't you, Sugar?
Yes, of course.
Say, how about inviting me
and Polly?
- We love yachts.
- Surest thing you know.
Come along, George.
Say, look, Sugar,
it's early now.
Couldn't we...
Now, it's been
a delightful evening,
but now we are going.
Good night, Mrs. Merrick.
Good night, Mrs. Trent.
Shame you can't stay
for the bat hunt.
I'll be with you
on the second hunt.
- Good night, Polly.
- Good night, George.
- So long, Anne.
- Good night, Georgie.
Now, where is that old bat?
George!
Oh, there you are.
Well, good night, all.
Why don't you slide down
the banister, Sugar?
Uh, now where's your room?
Right around here a piece.
- A piece?
- I told you.
I think it's all too wonderful
having you all
drop in like this.
I wish somebody would pinch me
to see if I'm awake.
Well, pinch her, Biney.
You're single.
You can afford to take the rap.
Oh, my goodness!
What is it now?
I left my nightgown hanging
over one of the chairs.
Well, no wonder.
No wonder what?
No wonder you have bats.
There's nothing draws bats
like a nightgown.
Oh?
- Are you ready, Biney?
- Sure enough.
Well, let's save
the colonel's daughter.
I'll bet you Yankee boys
are a mess of fun at a party.
Now where's the bat?
Well, if you were a bat,
where would you hide?
Well, I...
You're thinking of a horse.
- Here bat, here bat.
- Come, come, come, come.
My family just can't understand
why I left our old plantation
to come up north.
But I just love New York.
Of course, I don't
always feel so safe here.
I don't see why.
I used to be awful lonely,
but I don't anymore
since I got to know you all.
There's nothing
like old friends, is there?
Ain't it the truth?
That's not it.
I can't find a bat anywhere.
Oh, much obliged anyhow.
You just about saved my life.
Oh, that's nothing.
Okay, Biney.
Treasure hunt's over.
- Well...
- My folks just sent me some Virginia ham,
and I'm fixing to whip up
some meat and biscuits.
Won't you all stay
and have some?
Well, not tonight, Miss, uh...
Please call me Luella Mae.
We'll all call you Luella Mae.
- Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Good night.
You'd better look out, Steve.
That Southern bloodhound
is after you.
Don't worry, dear. I'm anemic.
Hey, what about opening up
another can of sardines?
You will open up
no more cans tonight.
I've got to go to the office,
and you're going with me.
Sugar says no.
Good night, Mrs. Merrick.
Good night, Steve.
Good night.
- It was a grand party.
- Thank you.
- Good night, Steve.
- I'll take this, Biney.
Wasn't that a swell party?
I don't know. Was it?
- Cigarette?
- Mm-hmm.
Thank you, darling.
Thank you.
Two sleepy people
by dawn's early light
And too much in love
to say good night
Here we are
Out of cigarettes
Holding hands and yawning
Look how late it gets
Two sleepy people
With nothing to say
And too much in love
to break away
Do you remember
The nights we had
to linger in the hall?
Yeah.
Father didn't like you at all.
Whatever happened to him?
Remember the reason why
we married in the fall?
To rent this little nest
And get a bit of rest
But here we are
Just about the same
Foggy little fella
Drowsy little dame
Two sleepy people
By dawn's early light
Too much in love
to say good night
Here we are.
Gee, don't we look a mess?
Lipstick on my collar
Whose?
Wrinkles in your dress
Two sleepy people
Who know very well
They're too much in love
to break the spell
Here we are
Crazy in the head
- Gee, your eyes are gorgeous.
- Yeah?
Even when they're red.
Is that the milkman?
No, that's dawn breaking.
- Oh!
- Oh!
I'm sorry.
Do you remember the nights
we used to cuddle in the car?
Watching every last
fading star
Remember the doctor said
your health was under par
And you, my little schnooks
Were ruining your looks
Well, here we are.
Keeping up the pace
Letting each tomorrow
slap us in the face
Two sleepy people
By dawn's early light
And too much in love
To say.
I'm a lucky guy, you know.
How come?
You know, as we sat there
at dinner tonight,
I kept asking myself
how it happened.
You know, you could have
married Gil if you wanted to.
A guy who could
give you anything,
a guy who has gotten somewhere.
Instead you picked
a dark horse like me.
I've got a strong hunch
that dark horse
is going to win the race.
He sure got himself
a good jockey.
Bet two bucks
on that horse for me.
Good night.
Shh.
Steve, breakfast is ready.
I'll be right there, dear.
Good morning, Mrs. M.
How'd you sleep, darling?
I dreamed I was in Luella's
room all night chasing bats.
Well, don't start
walking in your sleep.
Say, I must remember
to call up George
about that yachting party.
- I don't think we ought to go.
- Why not?
I haven't anything
to wear on a yacht.
All right, honey, just grab
your little yellow basket
and go out and buy
a couple of things.
I can't do that, Steve.
Our budget won't stand it.
Oh, Anne,
forget about the budget.
George is one
of our closest friends,
and we can't let him down.
How much work do you expect
to get done on a yacht?
Sweetheart, we gotta have
a little fun now and then.
All right, you have your fun.
But you can have it without me.
You mean you're not going?
That's just what I mean.
When your novel's finished,
you can have plenty of fun,
and I'll share it with you.
But until it is,
I'm Old Lady Sourpuss.
You know, Gil was right
when he said that you...
Oh, now don't start quoting Gil.
I got an overdose
of that book-peddler last night.
That's a nice way to talk about
a man who was so charming to us.
He was charming to you,
all right, oh, yes.
He had a bad case on you once,
and he doesn't seem
to have gotten over it.
We aren't
getting jealous, are we?
No! I haven't got
a jealous bone in my body.
All I mean is that Gil Morrell
doesn't half-know
what he's talking about.
Did you hear what he said
about me giving up my job?
That was the most
sensible thing he said.
Oh, is that so?
Well, who's gonna stake me?
Of course, we could call up
The Rockefeller Foundation.
James, bring me my silk hat,
white tie, and tails.
I'm going out
and buy a hamburger.
Yes, with onions.
Heh. Wouldn't I look swell
wearing tails?
The way you act, I'll bet some
of your ancestors wore them.
Where are you going?
I'm going to see
about that top hat.
Could I talk to Mr. Brigden?
This is Anne Merrick speaking.
Anne!
You're not going back
to your old job.
And who are you?
I am your husband, remember?
Aren't you funny?
Oh, is that you, Mrs. Brigden?
Darling, how are you?
Fine, thanks.
Anne, I don't like to make a
scene this early in the morning.
Could I speak to the boss
for a minute?
If you think I'm gonna
be another George Trent...
You won't be.
You're going to earn your keep.
You're going to take care of
the house and do the cooking.
Listen, Anne Merrick,
if you think you're gonna parade
around in a pair of step-ins
while I'm home here
slaving over a hot stove,
you're badly mistaken.
Oh, Mr. Brigden,
this is Anne Merrick.
Well, it's like this...
I'd like to have
my old job back.
Cooking.
Certainly, I'm on the level.
All right, I'll hold the line.
When you're not shelling peas,
you can finish
the Great American Novel.
I won't give up my job
and be a kept man!
Who said anything
about keeping you?
I am lending you the money,
and if you don't pay it back...
Monday morning, 9:00?
I'll be there.
Would you be interested
in a subscription
to the Women's Home Journal?
Do I look that way?
Sure.
Hello?
The electric light company?
Well, I paid my...
Oh, you want me to see
if the streetlight
on the corner is burning?
I don't mind.
Yes, it is.
Blow it out? Ye...
Hello! Hello!
Wait a minute, wise...
Blow it out.
Sounded like Biney to me.
Are you hissing me?
Go get your rag
and help, will you?
Go on.
That's the biggest thing
I ever saw.
Oh, you should
see the emerald he has.
It's driving me crazy.
Some Indian princess
used to wear it in her nose.
In her nose?
Over there they think nothing
of puncturing the nose
and loading it down with jewels.
They must be savages.
He told me he'd give me
the emerald tonight.
- Maybe.
- Are you engaged to him?
Certainly not.
After all, I only met
the man last night.
Oh.
Hello, how do you do?
This is Frances. How are you?
Oh, pardon me.
I thought
you were somebody else.
Tired, dear?
Tired? Oh!
Telephone, Anne.
What's the matter?
Don't you feel good, honey?
I feel like the breaking up
of a hard winter.
Move, my love.
Yes?
Listen, Anne, how about you
and Steve having dinner
with an old sweetheart of yours?
Well, certainly I mean me.
How many old sweethearts
have you got?
Sounds grand, Gil, but Steve's
expecting me home for dinner.
And I have an appointment later.
Well, I'm not very far away.
What about me driving you home?
I accept.
In fact, if someone
hadn't produced a car,
I don't know how
I'd have gotten home.
I'm really tired.
Shh, shh, shh!
Go away, Tiger. Shh!
Who is it?
Good evening, laundry.
Well, it's about time
you showed up.
- You got my shirts there?
- Yes, Mr. Merrick.
You'll find them
right underneath the bill.
Don't I smell gas?
Oh, is that what that is?
Do you cook?
I try to. Do you?
No. I'm always too busy
trying to collect.
Anyway, it seems like a woman
don't look up
to a man who would do housework.
Once a woman
gets you under her thumb,
she just thumbs you to death.
Oh, yeah.
What about the money
for this laundry?
You know the rules.
Us janitors can't deliver it
unless we get the cash.
Excuse me.
I didn't know you had company.
Oh, come on in, Luella.
This is Liberty Hall.
Stevie, I'm in such trouble.
Again?
What is it this time, snakes?
No, my papa says I've got to
give up my career and come home.
That's good.
Why, Steve Merrick!
If that buzzer rings again
in this house, I'll just...
But I don't want to go home.
I'd just as leave stay here.
I'd leave for.
Yeah.
And I'd leave for you left.
Come on. Get out.
Now, don't you try
to put me out.
I've gone out of here
once by myself!
I know. Goodbye.
Well?
I'll have that other laundry
ready for you tomorrow.
- I'll pay you then.
- I'm sorry, boss.
But no cashy, no washy.
Well, don't worry,
you'll get your money.
I'll pay you if it
takes my last IOU.
You know, Mr. Merrick,
if I had your soft soap,
maybe I could start
my own laundry.
- How much do I owe you?
- $10.25.
Wait a minute.
Madam, do you need
the exterminator?
No, and get out of here.
- George!
- Steve.
Just in the nick of time.
Say, could you loan me $10?
Well, that's what I came
to see you about.
Could you loan me a dollar?
- No.
- No.
Don't look at me.
I'm only 30 cents short
of having a quarter.
I thought
you were a millionaire.
I only married one.
You see, I'm on an allowance.
Could you lend me
your watch so I can hock it?
My watch is in escrow.
Anne get paid today?
Yeah.
I'll wait.
- Can I help you?
- Do you know how to shell peas?
No. But I've always
wanted to learn.
Well, step into my office.
Personally,
I like canned peas better.
I wonder who ever thought
of putting them up
in these little wrappers.
Some day they'll put
zippers on 'em.
There it goes again.
Woman's work is never done.
- Well?
- I'm back again!
Forgot to ask you
for the garbage.
The garbage isn't ready yet.
Well, it's 6:30.
That's garbage time.
Well, I gave you some yesterday.
- Yeah, I know, but...
- Well, don't be a hog!
Here.
Is that all?
No, I'll try and borrow
some next door.
No use, they ain't been
eating regular either.
Who was that?
The G man.
G man?
Do I smell something burning?
Oh!
Recipe number 19.
It was.
Here, kitty, kitty,
kitty, kitty, kitty.
Here, kitty.
There you are.
That's a good kitty.
Uh, tell me, Steve,
as one housewife to another...
I'm no housewife.
I'm just borrowing until
we can live on what I write.
Are you on an allowance, too?
- No!
- Well, bide your time.
- Yoo-hoo.
- There's Anne now.
Oh, Anne...
George, I haven't
seen you for ages.
Say, Anne,
could you lend me a dollar?
- Why, George!
- Well, Sugar's taking me to Newport.
She's waiting
at the station now.
I'd hate to think what would
happen if I didn't get there.
Oh, thanks.
- So long, Steve.
- Goodbye, George.
Hello, darling.
Well, I spoiled your dinner.
I don't mind.
Have a hard day?
About the same as usual.
How's the writing going?
Oh, swell, I'm racing ahead
like a fire engine.
I'm so glad.
I get so terribly anxious
about it, Steve.
Why?
Well, I want you to finish it.
What chapter are you on?
Oh, I've lost count.
Never mind that.
Chapter five?
Put that down, will you?
It's not right yet.
But you were on chapter five
last week.
All right. What about it?
You must be inspired.
I'm sorry I ruined your dinner.
Forget about it.
Oh, darling.
Forgive me for being cross.
Forgiven.
You know, you didn't
kiss me when I came in.
I know, this business
has gotten under my skin
these last few weeks.
It's impossible for me
to be close to you.
Is that it?
I've been wondering,
because I haven't changed.
I still want you.
- You know what?
- No, what?
- I'm hungry.
- You and me both.
How'd you like me to get dinner?
Oh, I'm eating right now.
All right, you set the table
and I'll get the can opener.
More shortcake?
What do you want me to do,
bust wide open?
Say, Anne, how about going out
to a picture with me tonight?
You know, we haven't been
anywhere together
for a dog's age.
Don't you think you ought
to spend the time working?
Yeah. I guess you're right.
Anne?
Could you let me have $10?
Why don't you take it out
of the household money?
Well, there isn't any.
But darling,
I put $28 there last Saturday.
All right then,
don't lend me $10!
- Here it is, dear.
- I don't want it.
Oh, Steve, don't be childish.
I've got to leave you now.
Don't touch the dishes.
We'll wash them when I get home.
Well, where are you going?
Well, Steve.
Can't a working woman
have a little time to herself?
Well, I asked you
where you were going.
I've got a date.
Oh, so you won't go
to a picture with me,
but you'll step out
with some other fella.
Who's the date with?
A fellow I know.
Does he know you're married?
He ought to.
I've got marriage
written all over me.
Well, I don't like it.
Oh, Steve.
Please be nice.
This is really important.
I don't care, people that
are married have no business
seeing a lot of other people.
Oh, I do hope
I'm not an intruder.
Well, Luella,
how long have you been here?
Just a minute, I often slip
in through your balcony.
It's a shortcut.
Oh, well,
I'm glad you found a shortcut.
It makes everything
much simpler.
What is it, Luella?
Stevie, I want you
to come to the station with me
about my tickets.
I'm such a baby.
I'm afraid Steve can't.
He's staying home tonight
to work.
Oh, I'll be delighted
to go with you, Luella.
Oh...
You won't forget your allowance,
will you, Stevie?
Did I do something wrong?
Luella, how'd you like me
to give you
a farewell party with champagne?
- Champagne?
- You heard me.
Oh, Stevie, you're marvelous.
I'll go home
and change my frock.
I got a brand-new one
for the party.
Stevie!
Coming.
Oh, my,
but you look powerful sharp.
What? In this old suit?
It doesn't look old
the way you wear it.
Oh, don't be silly.
Oh, Stevie,
I declare, I don't know
what I'm going
to do without you.
I sure don't.
Oh, my goodness!
Hey, come out of there!
Well, what do you tramps want?
It can't be Steve Merrick.
Say, a remarkable resemblance.
Them eyes, those hair,
those nose.
- It is Steve Merrick.
- How are you, sunshine?
Oh, I feel fine.
How about a little drink?
We're dying of thirst.
We brought our own ice.
Well, we don't
serve liquor here.
Oh!
Well, I guess we'll have
to use our own then.
Oh, excuse me.
Here's your champagne,
Mr. Merrick. Eight bucks.
Shh.
Champagne?
- Thanks, Kelly.
- Thank you.
I'll put this on ice.
I thought he wasn't serving
liquor around here anymore.
Champagne isn't liquor,
silly, it's a luxury.
Hello.
Well, well, well.
I hope you all don't think it's
funny me coming out of there.
Oh, mercy, no.
I was waiting for Steve.
Chasing bats again.
She was waiting for Steve.
I'm ready if you are, Stevie.
I'm taking Luella
to the station.
Just make yourselves at home.
I wish I had somebody
to buy me champagne.
Listen, gold digger,
as long as you run around
with me, you'll drink gin.
And don't I know it.
Ahem.
Well, of all things.
The butler told me
to come right in.
- I hope you don't mind.
- Mind?
Believe it or not,
I just got through praying
that you'd walk in
through that window.
Look at my knees, they're all
dusty where I was kneeling.
Sit down.
Well.
Now, what's on
your beautiful mind?
Gil, I need some money.
How much?
Oh, I don't want to borrow it,
I want to earn it.
I'm sorry.
I'd like to loan you a lot
and then press you for payment.
Well, you see, I know you have
a lot of manuscripts to read,
and I thought...
well, I might be able
to help you out
two or three nights a week.
No, ma'am,
I wouldn't take such a risk.
Risk?
If you read scripts for me,
you'd have to read them here,
and I guess you know
what that would lead to.
I haven't the faintest idea.
Now don't go Pollyanna on me.
I'm crazy enough
about you as it is.
If I saw much of you,
I'd go right off the deep end
and start dirty work.
By the way,
while we're on the subject...
How about divorcing Steve
and marrying me?
Oh, Gil.
You're not in love with me.
- You think not?
- No.
If you could read my mind
whenever I think about you...
Well, you wouldn't say that.
Now, I've let my hair down,
how do you feel about me?
You're just a big-hearted
brother to me, Gil.
Listen, lady, if I ever
started on you in earnest,
Steve'd put you
right out on the sidewalk.
Now, how come you need
this extra money?
You earn more than Steve did
when he was working.
Well, it's, uh...
it's for my family.
I didn't know you had a family.
Don't tell me
I'm going to be a godfather.
Listen, lady, you're going
to stop being a model tomorrow
- and work for me regularly.
- Oh, Gil!
Here's my first gift
to my godchild.
I want you to go uptown
and get the gal-darndest
rattle they've got.
Solid silver,
with letters on it an inch high.
"To snookums, from Uncle Gil."
- Do you hear?
- Oh, Gil, I can't take this.
You're going to take it.
It's really an advance
on Steve's novel, see?
Gee, he must be thrilled.
- What did he say when you told him?
- I haven't told him yet.
I came right straight here
from the doctor's.
Come on, get out of here.
You're going right home
and tell Steve.
It'll put new life into him.
Oh, and tell him from me
that I read those first
few chapters he sent me,
and they're swell.
Really, Gil?
Well...
Well...
A grand wife, a novel,
and a brand-new baby.
Some fellas get all the breaks.
A change for a d-I-I-ime
Fine, Biney.
Hello.
Hurray, our hostess.
Where's Steve?
I, uh... I think he went out.
Anne, you look all in.
Let me get you a drink.
No, thanks.
I'll just have a glass of milk.
The champagne.
Anne, don't go in there.
- Why not?
- Let me get it for you.
Well, all right.
How about a roast beef sandwich?
No, just a glass of milk.
- How you been, Biney?
- Mighty handsome.
- I'll get it.
- Thanks.
Oh, thank you.
Oh, wait a moment.
Wait a minute, mister.
I can't let nobody have this
till somebody pays their bill.
Where have I heard that before?
How much is it?
$10.25.
What?
He ain't paid me in four weeks.
This is too sordid for me.
Here you are.
I'll see that this
doesn't happen again.
I hope so, lady, 'cause
them steps is wearing me down.
Now, stop it, Biney.
I don't want to spoil
my appetite.
Well, if beef isn't dead cow,
what is it?
Oh! Stop it!
You ever been
to a slaughterhouse?
Oh!
Biney, is this for me?
Oh, my soul.
Who let her in there?
You and your dead cow.
Anne, I forgot to tell you...
You shouldn't have
done this, really.
It was just a whim of mine.
Anybody home?
Hurray, the economic royalist.
Hello, George!
How does it feel
to be bought and paid for?
Gee, George, you look funny,
funnier than usual.
What happened?
I thought you were
on your way to Newport.
I got in a traffic jam.
And when I reached the station,
the train had pulled out,
but Sugar hadn't.
There she stood,
surrounded by her bags
and her maids and my valet,
and did she give it to me!
She didn't leave a rag on me.
Honestly, the way I felt,
I could have been arrested
for indecent exposure.
- And you took it, I suppose.
- Well, I had to, Biney.
You can't stop a woman
like Sugar.
You could say something,
couldn't you?
Well, I did.
As soon as I could get a word
in edgeways, I socked her.
And what did she do?
Well, the last I saw of her,
her maids and my valet
were raising her from the dead.
And as far as I'm concerned,
she can stay that way.
Hurray, this calls
for a celebration.
Well, come on,
we've got the makings.
Just a minute, that
happens to be my champagne.
It may be yours,
but we're going to drink it.
Did you say yours?
Yes, I bought it for Luella.
Luella, Steve's taken you
out a lot, hasn't he?
Why, no.
Well, every time
he took you out, I paid for it.
And when he bought you
champagne, I paid for it.
- Shut up, will you?
- I won't.
All right, then tell her,
tell them all.
She buys my food,
she buys my clothes,
she pays the rent.
To make a long story loathsome,
she's the man of the house.
Now everybody knows it.
- Where are you going?
- Out.
Steve, there's something
I want to tell you.
You've told me enough.
But, Steve, this is important!
Just one thing more...
That champagne tonight
was the first money
I ever spent on Luella.
Then what became of the money?
I've been buying you a winter
coat on the installment plan.
- Oh, Steve.
- I thought I could pay for it
out of the household money
and surprise you.
Well, I only made a mess
of things, the way I always do.
The coat's in a box
on the top closet shelf.
I didn't want you
to know you were paying
for your own present,
but you'll get it back,
every last penny.
What are you going to do?
Get myself a job
and feel like a man again.
Oh, Steve, don't do that.
Look, dear,
I've got a check for you.
It's from Gil.
It's an advance on your novel.
What are you trying to do?
Make a fool out of me?
It's made out to you.
Oh, Steve, listen.
There's something
I have to tell you.
You don't have to tell me.
Gil's not paying me.
He's paying you.
Paying me?
I've closed my eyes
to a lot of things,
but I won't stand for this.
You don't have to.
Go back to your job.
Be a nobody all your life!
A nobody, that's what
I've been for four months.
George and I have been nothing
but a couple
of pinheaded pushovers,
only I wore an apron.
Well,
I can be pushed just so far.
Mr. Merrick?
What is it?
Somebody on this floor
is cooking.
Oh, that's a dirty shame.
Why, my dear landlady,
you know I wouldn't be baking
a cake on your premises.
Well, you can't trust
anybody these days.
Oh, it's you. How are you?
- Thirsty, as usual.
- How about a cup of coffee?
Oh, I'd rather stay thirsty.
If you don't mind,
I'll finish this chapter.
Go right ahead.
How's it going?
I'm on the last lap.
What's it about?
Boy meets girl, girl meets Gil,
Gil gets girl.
Gil gonna handle it for you?
The novel?
No.
What's the matter with Gil?
Why should I send
my stuff to Gil?
'Cause he's a good publisher.
Say, nice view of
the mountains you got here.
Does it go with the room?
Gil Morrell broke up my home.
Your home is right
where you left it.
Takes two to make a home.
And about the same
to make a quarrel.
Listen, all I want to do
is pay Anne
what I owe her
and click as a writer.
When that's done, I never expect
to think of her again.
All I hope is that I never
have to see her again.
Steve, Anne's going away.
Where's she going?
To her aunt's in the country.
Serves her right.
She wants to see you
before she goes away.
Oh.
Oh, she does, does she?
Did she send you over here
with that message?
No, Steve, she said to George,
and George told Polly,
and Polly told me.
Listen, lug, you can tell Polly,
and Polly can tell George,
and so on and so on,
that she can go to the country...
- Steve!
- And as for you, take my advice
and keep away from my door.
Biney!
When's she leaving?
Was Steve glad to see you?
Sure, when he opened the door
and saw me standing there,
tears came into his eyes.
"Gee, Biney," he says,
"you're like the answer
to a maiden's prayer."
If I hadn't have kept
a stiff upper lip,
I think he'd have kissed me.
He wasn't glad to see me
when I dropped in on him.
Well, you don't understand
people like I do, George.
You mean well,
but you haven't any tact.
Hey, you don't think
there's going to be a divorce?
No, Steve's crazy about Anne.
Well, that's great.
People who were
foolish enough to get married
ought to stay that way.
Are you going to stay married
to Sugar after all you said?
Oh, gosh, Biney.
If I love her...
George, you're nothing
but a worm.
But what... what can I do?
Ever since I socked her that day
in the railroad station,
she's been after me...
Letters, telephone calls, wires.
I... I got this one
early this morning.
"To err is human.
To forgive, divine."
So you're going back on relief.
Say, you ought not to move
heavy things like that.
You're liable
to strain yourself.
A lot you'd care if I did.
Oh, don't be bitter, Polly.
One thing I can't stand
is a bitter woman.
I bit her woman once.
Biney, the door.
Oh, dear, if it isn't one thing,
it's another.
Anything wrong?
Those stairs...
We'll have them taken out.
You want to see the apartment?
If you please, I...
I liked the advertisement.
Come right in.
- Hello.
- How are you?
There's the manager.
You can talk to her.
- How do you do?
- Excuse the looks of things.
Mrs. Merrick's
going to the country,
and I'm trying
to pack her trunks.
I'll pack it for you, Polly.
- Will you, Biney?
- Certainly.
The bedroom's in there.
I'll show you that first.
Thank you.
George, come here a minute.
What do you make of this?
What... well, what is it?
Looks like baby clothes to me.
Well, what would Anne
be doing with baby clothes?
Oh, I can't imagine.
Unless...
I never thought of that.
Does Steve know?
I don't think so.
You know,
this is a real nice place.
How's the kitchen?
Enormous. You could stage
an ice carnival in it.
Maybe he doesn't skate.
I think it's terrible.
What's terrible?
Anne not telling Steve.
Oh, they don't tell
fathers anymore.
Oh.
You know, it's really very nice.
I don't see why the lady would
want to give up this place.
Well, the apartment
was big enough for two people
but not big enough for three.
You get it?
Yes. Well, I'll go get Mama.
It won't take long.
Fine. There'll be somebody here.
How did you two
find out about Anne's baby?
Now, listen,
when Anne comes back,
if either of you says a word,
I'll throw you right out
in the streets single-handed.
Look, Polly, all packed.
Well, bless your hearts.
Now let me see you get it
downstairs for me.
- I'll get the taxi.
- Say, wait a minute, Biney.
I can't handle this thing alone.
You're well rid of him.
He'd probably get you
on the front end
and then drop it on you.
Anne.
Welcome!
Get going. Get going.
And have mercy on that trunk.
Thanks, George.
Anne, I don't know what
I'm going to do without you.
I knew it... the trunk.
Goodbye.
Bye, Polly.
Polly, where's Anne?
Waiting for you.
Hello, Anne.
Hello, Steve. Won't you come in?
Nice to see you again, Anne.
Nice to see you.
You're looking well.
You're looking great.
You don't mind
if I straighten things up.
Some people are coming in
to look at the apartment.
Well, can't I help?
You know, I used to be
pretty good at housework.
Yes, I remember.
Anne, I have something for you.
- What's this?
- Part of my debt.
I wish you hadn't done this.
You'll get the rest pretty soon.
But, Steve,
this is more than enough.
Not for me it isn't.
With me, it's all or nothing.
It was nice of you
to send for me.
I wanted to see you.
Did you, darling?
About a divorce.
A divorce?
Anne, what divorce?
Ours, of course.
Steve,
I'm not going on like this.
Well, Anne, can't we
settle this between ourselves?
You see,
I lost my sense of importance.
I couldn't write.
I couldn't do anything.
You could fight.
I wasn't fighting you,
darling, just myself.
Things were piling up on me.
I had to fight.
It didn't matter about what.
It did to me.
Come on, Mama,
there's just one more flight.
You told me there were
only two flights.
I know,
and I made a mistake, Mama.
You deliberately deceived me,
Jim Platt.
I've checked over everything.
Here's your insurance policy.
Anne, don't leave me like this.
I can't live without you.
You've managed pretty well
for the last three months.
Who says so?
I've been so lonely for you,
I could hardly go on.
You didn't do anything
about it, did you?
I couldn't, Anne.
First, I had to win back
my self-respect.
I wanted to pay you what
I owed you and finish my novel.
I guess those people aren't
coming back after all.
Anne.
When you've seen a lawyer,
you can reach me through Gil.
Are you going to marry Gil?
I don't know.
Well, would you kiss me goodbye?
Why not?
Well, here we are.
Oh, this is my husband.
Pleased to meet you.
I'm Mr. Platt,
and this is Mrs. Platt.
How do you do?
Well, Mama,
wasn't this worth climbing for?
You're going
to leave everything?
Yes, it's for rent, furnished.
We haven't a stick of furniture.
We've just come from California.
Come in here, Mama.
This is what you'll enjoy.
He won't be happy till
he gets me in the kitchen again.
Anne?
Are you going to let
strangers move in here,
using our things,
dirtying up our kitchen?
Somebody's got to live here.
Will you please explain
to Mrs. Platt
about that refrigerator?
I'm all balled up.
Yes, of course.
It's very simple, Mrs. Platt.
All you do is step on the lever
and the door opens, like this.
Look, Mama, a place to hang
your stocking on Christmas Eve.
Oh...
I love to snuggle up to a fire.
My, my, now this is
what I call a chair.
You won't enjoy snuggling
up to this fire.
Unless you want
to choke to death.
This is one of those fireplaces
where all the smoke comes out
into the room and the heat
goes up the chimney.
Well, I declare.
That can be fixed.
- Cost you a lot of money.
- Not me.
That used to be my business.
Oh.
Does the radio work?
Sorry, it's out of order.
Oh.
You fixed it.
Well, that's
the first kitchen I've seen
in this town that is a kitchen.
The bedroom's right over here.
Mr. Platt. Mr. Platt.
It's a very sweet place,
but, of course,
the country will be better
for your baby.
My husband was telling me.
Cockroaches.
Well, can't you get rid of them?
We tried everything.
Well, that's funny.
Out in California...
California doesn't have
good cockroaches.
Our state's mighty proud
of its cockroaches.
It's just as cute as it can be.
Papa, I want you.
Mrs. Merrick says
we can move in tomorrow.
Mama, I want to talk to you.
All right, talk.
I...
Private, Mama.
Oh, excuse me.
What did you tell that man?
I thought it only fair to
tell him about the cockroaches.
I have lived here
over six months,
and I never saw one.
There's a lot of things
you don't see, darling.
I'm only trying
to open your eyes.
For pity's sake.
Anybody's liable to have those.
We'll be over first thing
in the morning.
Do you want to give
Mrs. Merrick a check?
I certainly do.
As long as I get
that nice easy chair.
That chair doesn't go
with the apartment.
But I thought...
That chair doesn't go!
And this table and this lamp!
- And that couch!
- Steve!
And this woman!
And this place is not for rent!
Come on, Papa.
Steve, please.
Mrs. Platt, don't listen to him.
Don't listen to her.
She's not in her right mind.
I understand, dear.
I was like that with my first.
Come on, Papa.
Her first? First what?
Oh, first husband, I suppose.
How should I know?
Anne, are you going
to have a baby?
Yes.
For a moment,
I thought you said "y... ".
You did say "yes"!
Anne. Anne!
That's swell.
That's certainly swell.
Two perfect strangers
walk in here from California
and tell me I'm to be a father.
What's going on here, anyway?
You're not going to walk out
of here with my baby.
Thanks for the memory.
Of meals I used to make
Dishes I would break
No motor trips
but burning lips
From all that burning steak
How lovely that was.
Thanks.
Thanks for the memory.
Of... of quarts of gin and rye.
How you'd alibi.
And how you swore the night you
wore my mother's Christmas tie.
It was a nice hunk of awning.
Thanks for the night
that you left me.
You didn't seem
worried about me.
Thought you'd do better
without me.
I loved you, though.
All right, I'll go.
Strictly entre nous
Darling, how are you?
And how are
all those little dreams
That never did come true?
Awfully glad I met you
Cheerio and toodle-oo.
Thank you so much.
Steve!
Steve!
Psst. He went that way.
Thanks.
Darling!