The Curse of Bridge Hollow (2022) Movie Script
1
["Hit the Road Jack"
by Ray Charles playing]
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
[man] Come on! Sing with us.
Sorry, Dad, but a family sing-along
isn't gonna make me
feel better about moving.
[sighs]
Look, Syd.
I know you're gonna miss Brooklyn. Okay?
But you won't miss the smell
of hydrogen sulfide every morning.
[laughing]
Because Bridge Hollow
smells like [inhales] apples
and a hint of white privilege.
And it was named "safest small town
in the US" last ten years running. So
Give Bridge Hollow a chance.
Small towns can be full of surprises.
And speaking of surprises
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
[screaming] What you say?
Uh, what you say?
Don't you come back no more
I didn't understand you
Don't you come back no more
[mystical music playing]
Whoa!
[sinister laughing]
What?
[pirate voice] Ahoy there, matey!
[sci-fi music playing]
Is it me,
or did we just drive in to a Party City?
[sighs]
[witches laughing]
[mom] Look! There it is.
[dad] Home sweet home.
Hey, Syd! Pop quiz.
If we left Brooklyn
20 minutes after the movers,
and they show up in the next two,
how much faster did we...
Whoa! Check out those zombies!
[dad] Oh yeah. Okay.
That's not disturbing at all.
Hey, babe, let's not invite
those neighbors over for dinner.
[mom laughs]
Dad, since we're not living
in an apartment anymore,
maybe we can finally decorate
our house for Halloween!
[groans] Uh
- You didn't answer my question.
- Mom, can we get a ruling?
- Yes, I mean...
- You gonna take me to Family Court?
It would be nice to fit in
with the neighborhood.
But, you know, we're gonna be so busy
moving in and getting ready for school.
- The court rules in favor of Dad.
- Mmm.
I'm sorry, baby.
Maybe next year?
[Syd] The system's rigged.
[truck approaching]
Okay. Let's go.
[dad] It's the movers!
[mysterious music playing]
[door creaking]
[loud bang]
[mysterious music continues]
Careful. Fragile package.
- [mom] Ha, ha, ha. Thank you.
- [chuckling]
- Kid's room. Upstairs.
- Okay.
Hey, neighbor! What's shakin'?
John Sullivan.
But everyone around here calls me Sully.
Except for my ex-wife.
I don't wanna tell you what she calls me.
- Howard Gordon. My wife calls me "honey."
- [Sully laughs]
- That's That's tough.
- Yeah.
Well, hey, listen,
you picked a hell of a time to move in.
As you can see, everybody around here
kind of goes crazy around Halloween, huh?
Yeah. It's a little ridiculous, right?
[laughs]
Huh?
No, I meant, uh, "crazy" as in "good."
- [chuckles] Oh yeah. I...
- Yeah.
- Really? Yeah.
- Yeah! Yeah.
See, the way it works here
is everybody kind of picks a theme,
and then you go big-time on that theme.
Really lean into it.
You gotta commit.
This year, I pulled out all the stops.
The Walking Dead. [Laughing]
- Booyah!
- Yeah
Not a fan. They jumped the shark
when they killed Glenn.
Yeah, that was a loss for everybody.
[kisses]
- [exhales] So you got a theme?
- No.
- You like werewolves?
- Not particularly.
'Cause I got
a whole shed full of werewolves.
That's real wolf fur.
I don't even know if it's legal.
And I don't care. 'Cause it's Halloween.
Uh, no, thanks. We're good.
- Really?
- We don't decorate.
Jehovah's Witness.
No, I just think it's kind of silly.
[scoffs]
- What?
- Do you still believe in Santa Claus?
[laughs]
Why? What have you heard? Is he okay?
Nice meeting you.
Great meeting you too, Howard.
Hey, you want that werewolf?
I can get that werewolf into your yard
in five minutes. It's not a problem.
- No, I'm-We're good.
- Wife got you on a short
- [choking] Yeah, I get it.
- [Howard] Go. Turn around. Keep going.
[Sully howling]
So, how unhappy
do you think Syd is about the move?
One to ten?
They haven't invented
a scale big enough to measure this one.
[chuckles]
I don't know.
I feel like she's turning into somebody
I don't even recognize anymore.
Well, that's what teenagers do, baby.
They they grow up.
They become their own person.
And you have to let her.
And what's that supposed to mean?
You pushed her to be on the science team.
Yeah, because she loves science.
And science
Is awesome.
She wanted to take ballet.
Right.
But now, our baby girl can defend herself.
You can't fight off a mugger
doing a pirouette.
Howard, this isn't Brooklyn.
The scariest things around here
are the decorations on people's lawns.
- [Howard sighs]
- Just
Give her some space.
[Howard sighs]
Okay.
[Howard grunts]
[mom sighs]
I'm putting it up.
[mystical music playing]
[indistinct chatter]
Look, Howard! Don't you think
that would be perfect for my bake shop?
Are you sure about this?
Running a bakery
is a lot different than being a lawyer.
I'm sure. I even decided on a name.
The Bridge Hollow Bakery.
Might wanna workshop that one.
- [Syd] Hey, Mom.
- Huh.
Are you gonna sell
things you normally make
or things that taste good?
Ha ha. I know you guys usually hate
on anything without gluten or butter,
but the PTA moms in Brooklyn
love my sugar-free pumpkin pie
with almond-powder crust.
- And this town is gonna love them too.
- [Howard] I'm sure they will.
- [horn honking rhythmically]
- Hey, there they are! The Gordons!
[chuckles] Baby?
Why does the crazy white lady
in the pumpkin car know who we are?
You're probably wondering,
"How does this crazy white lady
in a pumpkin car know who we are?"
- No Yeah.
- Tammy Rice. The mayor around here.
Don't be too impressed.
It's a volunteer position.
I also teach piano and drive an Uber.
You'd be surprised how many people
wanna ride in this pumpkin.
Hey, Howard, your first ride's on me, huh?
- [chuckling]
- Big science teacher from the big city!
Ah, no, thank you.
And what is all the signs up
for Stingy Jack?
Who is he? The town founder?
Wait, you've never heard of Stingy Jack?
[laughs] Okay. Well,
I turned his story into a sweater.
- So
- [sighs]
According to an old Irish legend,
there once lived
a wicked man named Stingy Jack.
And he was such a jerk
that the villagers finally had enough,
and [clicks tongue]
But the devil felt sorry for Jack,
so he made him a lantern.
A pumpkin carved out with a flame
from the fires of hell.
Hmm?
Every Halloween, Jack would return
to our town, Bridge Hollow,
to seek his revenge on the descendants
of the villagers who did him in.
Well, that's what we tell the tourists.
Am I right?
- [laughs]
- [laughs nervously]
Wait, so that's why
they call them jack-o'-lanterns!
[Howard] Hey, Syd, what do you say
we go hit up the local museum
where we can learn some actual facts.
[Syd] Uh, no. I'm gonna explore this town
and find something
that's actually fun to do.
She'll be fine.
Safest small town in the US, remember?
That's right, but don't let
any of those sore losers in Oaktown
hear you say that.
They didn't even make the top ten.
Uh, so, is there gonna be
any food at this festival?
Of course! Yeah, a lot
of the local stores are setting up booths.
We got hot dogs, funnel cakes,
chowder, everything.
Uh, is there gonna be
any artisanal vegan baked goods?
Hmm. I don't know what that means.
But sure, why not?
[indistinct chatter]
[mysterious music playing]
[clanging]
[tense music playing]
- [loud bang]
- [Syd gasps, grunts]
[girl] Whoa!
- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm good. Thanks.
What were you guys doing in there?
Grave-digging.
You can get really good money
on the dark web for a fully intact corpse.
I'm kidding. [Chuckles]
Show her, Mario.
Um, testing out
this new spectral EM four detection app.
It measures
electromagnetic field fluctuations.
Which is what happens
whenever the electrical charges in the air
are disturbed by a...
Ghost or other paranormal phenomena.
[chuckles] So, what are you guys?
Like, the Bridge Hollow High
Paranormal Society or something?
[exhales]
See? I told you the shirts were lame.
No, I like them.
Who is this girl?
Guys, don't be weird.
I'm Jamie. That's Ramona. This is Mario.
Sydney. [Chuckles]
Wait. Sydney Gordon?
You and your folks just moved
to the old Hawthorne house.
The what house?
Come on.
There's something you need to see.
Madam Hawthorne. One of the preeminent
spiritualist mediums of the 20th century.
She lived and died in your house.
Rumor has it she might still be there.
Wait, so I might live in a haunted house?
This place just got a lot cooler.
So, you're, like, into this kind of stuff.
Yeah. Kinda. I was gonna start
a Paranormal Club at my school, but
You didn't wanna be a social leper.
No. My dad wanted me
to join the science team instead.
Wow, he sounds so awesome.
So, have you experienced anything strange
in your house since you moved in?
- Cold drafts?
- Power fluctuations?
Voices from beyond the grave?
Well, I did hear
this weird noise the other night,
and it was
definitely not the house settling.
Well, in that case,
we have some homework for you.
[crickets chirping]
[sighs] Okay, not exactly sure
how this works,
but here goes nothing.
Madam Hawthorne.
Can you hear me?
[sighs]
[whooshing]
H
E
R
Here?
You're here?
[door creaking]
[door handle clicks]
[door creaking]
[glitches]
[tense music playing]
[door creaking]
Hello?
[floorboards creaking]
[tense music continues]
[door creaking]
[door slams shut]
"SJ 1927."
[tense music crescendos]
[mom] Ah!
Mmm.
[Syd] So you guys
are not gonna believe this,
but this house is totally haunted.
What?
- [Syd] No! For real!
- [Howard laughs]
By an old Gypsy woman named Hawthorne.
She used to live here in this house.
And for some reason,
she gave me her pumpkin, but
Oh, I get it. And that's why
we should move back to Brooklyn.
I'm not making this up.
Haven't you heard all the freaky noises?
It's an old house, sweetie.
Old houses are like old people.
- They make freaky noises.
- Yeah, and they're drafty.
It's the wood. It expands. It contracts.
It's not ghosts. It's science.
Let me tell you what happened.
I was using the Ouija board app...
Oh, come on. A Ouija board is nonsense,
and an app is even worse.
What's the ghost supposed to do?
Get a Wi-Fi password?
[laughs] Ow!
I don't know why I even bothered.
I should have known.
Known what?
That you would make fun of me
for believing in things like this.
Just like you always do.
I I do not. Do I do I make fun
You just did.
Well, it's not what I meant.
I just want you to start
looking at the world scientifically.
Then you'll realize
that all these crazy things
have a much more realistic explanation.
So you weren't making fun of me.
You just think I'm stupid. Okay.
Wait. I I didn't say you were stupid!
[door closes]
Just ignorant.
- [mom] I'm about to smack you.
- [gasps]
[indistinct chatter]
Oh! There he is! In the flesh.
The man, the myth, the legend.
Principal Pretty-Boy Floyd.
Good to see you again, buddy.
Thanks for the help getting us settled.
I appreciate it.
Oh, no, Howard.
Thank you for stepping in mid semester.
You really saved my behind.
Boy, when Mr. Viveros won the lottery
and took off
to Key West with his mistress,
it really put us in a pickle.
- [chuckling] Yeah
- Oh
- You don't play the lottery, do you?
- No.
Okay.
- And the marriage?
- Solid.
- Really?
- Jay-Z/Beyonc.
- I'll show you the classroom.
- All right.
[both laughing]
[Floyd] Well, here it is. [Chuckling]
Check it out.
Wow! We didn't have all this in Brooklyn.
- [Floyd] Yeah.
- This is great.
Brand-new microscopes.
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.
- Bunsen burner at every station.
- These are yours now.
- Thank you.
- We got a brand-new sterilizer here.
- Nice.
- Chemical cabinet, fully stocked.
- Okay.
[screaming]
- Whoa!
- [laughing]
Ah, look at this!
The kids on the science team
rigged this one up for you.
- You like it?
- No, no, no.
They call him Albert Spine-stein.
[laughing]
Get... Ooh.
Get Get him off.
That's funny.
Did we get you?
[laughing] Yeah, you got me.
Yeah, Howard. [Laughing]
Come on in, kids.
This is, uh, Mr. Gordon,
your new science teacher.
He'll be with you
for the rest of the semester.
Bring out the freaks
It's gonna be a helluva night
[Syd] I have never been so scared.
When I opened the trunk,
I thought it was gonna be,
like, this severed head inside.
Turned out it was
just some broke-ass pumpkin.
[all chuckling]
Oh, that reminds me. I.
I don't know
what you got planned for tonight,
but we'll be back up at the school,
working the
the "Halls of Horror." [chuckles]
You should come. It's sick.
We go every year.
So it's obviously super cool.
[Jamie] Okay. It's a little cheesy.
But everyone wears a costume,
and it's fun to check them all out.
Yeah, sounds really cool, guys,
but I don't really have a costume.
My family doesn't really do Halloween.
What does that even mean?
It's my dad's thing to hate on Halloween.
He says he thinks it's stupid.
[scoffs] This guy just doesn't get it.
But I honestly think,
for some dumb reason,
it actually freaks him out.
No pressure, but you know where to find us
if you change your mind.
- Okay.
- Bye.
[whimsical music playing]
Hmm. Screw it.
I'm your boogey man
That's what I am
I'm here to do whatever I can
Be it early morning
[evil laugh]
Late afternoon
Or at midnight
It's never too soon
To want to please you
To want to keep you
- Hey, do you want a headband?
- Oh! Thanks. [Chuckles]
I want to be your
Be your rubber ball
I want to be the one
Ya love most of all
Oh yeah
- [boy] Trick or treat!
- [screams]
Oh!
Oh!
Kid, never ever jump
out the bushes on a Black man.
Leave candy on your porch next time.
It's Halloween.
Boy, you better get
your little behind off my property.
[sighs]
Aw, come on, Sully.
A rubber bat.
[squeaks]
[groans]
[child in distance] Trick or treat!
[exhales]
Sydney!
[squeaks]
Hi, Dad.
Okay. [Chuckles]
Okay. I see what you're doing.
What am I doing?
If I had to guess,
I'd say trying to annoy me.
No, I'm trying to have fun.
Annoying you is just the bonus.
Look, I'm sorry if you thought
I was making fun of you.
And for moving me here.
- I did that for our family.
- And for treating me like a child.
You are a child.
Do you want to know something, Dad?
I'm done being treated like a baby.
I'm 14. I can make my own decisions,
starting with what holidays
I choose to celebrate.
Oh, and you know that science team
you love so much?
Yeah, well, I hate it, and I quit.
[gasps]
[Howard] Yeah?
Well, how about this?
You're grounded.
What? Why?
Because I'm your father, and I said so.
Now go to your room.
Hmm?
[mysterious music playing]
You heard me. I said, go to your roo...
[scoffs] Cute. Little trick candle?
Little magnesium on the wick?
I got something for you. Hmm?
How about that? Hmm?
What about that? [Wincing]
[blowing] Okay.
How do you like those apples?
You and your little tricks.
Thinking you all grown.
- [squeaks]
- Dad, it was still lit!
- Relax. Saliva neutralized... What the
- [banging]
[banging]
[banging]
Oh shit!
Hey, watch your mouth!
- [bat screeching]
- [screaming] Ah, shit! Shit!
[grunts]
Ah!
[grunts]
Oh!
[pan clangs]
[grunts]
[whispering] Come here! Come.
I can't believe
you brought a bat into our home!
Dad! Do you really think
I went into some cave,
found a live bat, and brought it home?
Not all bats live in caves.
Actually, some species,
they live under bridges or in trees.
You know, it's funny,
the western red bat...
Dad, the bat isn't real!
- [bat screeches]
- Whoa!
It sure looked real to me! [Grunts]
[glass shattering]
[whistling]
[mimicking bat]
[warbling]
[mimicking bat]
[whispering] Where is it?
I don't know.
[screams] Dad!
- [bat screeches]
- [screams]
[both screaming]
[bat screeching]
[glass shattering]
[screeching continues]
[boy] Look how much candy I got.
[Howard groaning]
If you're trying to annoy me,
it worked.
Oh, it worked.
[Howard grunting]
[cat meows]
[sinister music playing]
[witches laughing]
- [horn honking]
- [cat meows]
[snarls, purrs]
Uh, Dad, I think
something really weird is going on.
[witch laughing]
[witches laughing]
[witches cackling]
- And I'm gonna find out what it is.
- Oh, no, you're not.
You're grounded, remember?
Wait, who who are you calling?
[scoffs]
You can call God for all I care, so
I said what I said.
- Hey, Syd, what's up?
- Mom, there's some spooky sh
"Stuff" happening tonight.
I know it sounds weird,
but the Halloween decorations
are coming to life.
I want to find out what's going on,
but Dad won't let me.
Gimme the phone.
- Emily, listen, your daughter is trippin'.
- [Emily] No. Think about your daughter.
She wanted to stay in Brooklyn.
And you said no.
- I know, but you...
- She wanted to decorate the house.
And you said no.
She wanted to take ballet.
- Baby, you said no.
- But but that's for her safety.
We are not saying no to this.
It's Halloween. Let her have some fun.
Put me on speaker.
[groaning]
[Emily] The court rules in favor
Of Sydney.
- Yes!
- Damn.
The system works.
Okay.
You can go, but I'm going with you.
- What?
- Look.
Halloween brings out all the crazies,
even in a safe town like this.
No. Mm-mm. Tomorrow, you get space.
Tonight, you get me.
[Emily] Court agrees!
Yeah!
[Emily] Have fun, you guys.
Come by the Stingy Jack Festival.
I have treats waiting.
[groans]
[phone line beeps]
[zombie voice] Brains
Don't worry, kids.
These, uh, zombies won't bite.
Or will they?
I'm just busting your beans.
Get in there. Get the good stuff.
[kids scream]
[laughing] Booyah!
That worked too good. That was too good.
You should've seen your faces.
You look ridiculous.
You got nailed. You got smoked.
I'm just kidding. You guys recovered.
That was a good recovery. I like that.
Come on, grab some stuff here.
There you go. That's for you.
Little something for you.
A couple for you. There you go.
Enjoy it.
You're welcome.
Be careful out there. A lot of freaks.
[grunts]
Back to bed, Mrs. Sullivan. [Laughing]
Eh.
Come on.
What the
Where'd you come from?
[cat purring]
Hey, get out of here. Beat it. Will ya?
- [cat hissing]
- Feisty little one, huh?
[hissing]
[snarls angrily]
[chuckles] Didn't see that coming,
did you?
All right, let's go. Get out of here.
- [skeleton snarling]
- [Sully grunts]
[screams]
[grunts, screams]
See, Dad? I told you.
The bat's eyes were glowing red,
just like this pumpkin.
Just like the witches
from across the street.
Right.
Witches coming to life.
[exhales]
Okay. So what's your plan?
Drive around town, looking for
Halloween decorations with red eyes?
Someone has to do something,
and it might as well be...
[Sully screaming]
[Howard] Wait, Syd. Where are you going?
[screaming, struggling]
[grunting] Get off me!
[zombies growling]
[zombie] Brains
Brains
What the
- [zombies] Brains
- Whoa!
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. [Laughing]
Oh, come on now. Oh, here we go.
Now those are
some impressive animatronics.
Way more impressive
than a stupid werewolf in the shed.
Eat lead, bastard!
[Sully laughing] Oh yeah.
Oh! That worked. Okay.
Come on. Well
Oh no!
[screams, grunts]
[struggling]
[zombie] Brains
[screaming]
Now, that's a bit much.
Dad, we have to do something.
It... Relax, Syd. Okay?
He's just putting on a show
for the trick-or-treaters.
- [screaming]
- Although, that is disturbingly realistic.
- I'll do it myself.
- Wait. Syd, wait.
What? Hey, what are you gonna do?
[grunting]
[Sully screaming]
- That that's not nice, Sydney.
- [Sully] Oh, yeah!
That was awesome! Oh! Good job.
[grunts]
[zombie] Brains
Okay, that...
All right. That's enough play, guys.
[zombie grunts]
[Sully grunts]
[zombie] Brains
- Booyah!
- Holy cow!
Syd, are you okay?
What happened here?
Did all these things short-circuit?
I'll tell you what happened here.
One of these zombies just bit me! Huh?
Oh God. Does that mean
I'm gonna turn into one of them?
Is that how this works?
You can't let me turn.
You gotta shoot me. Blow my head off, man.
What? No, I'm not gonna shoot you!
- I don't wanna turn into a zombie!
- You're not gonna turn into a zombie!
- Zombies are fictional creations. Okay?
- [scoffs]
Dead bodies don't have
functioning nervous systems,
which means they can't move.
Basic biology.
I didn't understand
a single word you just said.
Maybe I should handcuff myself
to the porch just in case.
Or you can get a tetanus shot.
Yeah. Good call, Bill Nye the Science Guy.
- [laughing] Burn.
- [snickers]
You smoked.
Dad, the zombies' eyes were glowing red
just like the bat
and like the flame in Hawthorne's pumpkin.
This all has something to do with her.
I know it does.
- [Sully grunting]
- I'm gonna try to contact her.
Oh, come on, not the Ouija board app.
Give me a break.
Maybe there's another option
we can explore.
Okay. What do you suggest? I'm all ears.
How do you propose
we talk to Hawthorne? She's dead.
[Sully] No, she's not.
No.
- [Howard sighs]
- You're talking about old Madam Hawthorne?
[chuckles] Yeah. Oh yeah.
She's as dead as one
of these brain-eating bastards.
But her granddaughter Victoria
[growls, laughs]
she's still sucking air.
No
[Howard groans]
Even the retirement home is decorated?
- [car door closes]
- Who wants to trick-or-treat here?
Stay alert. An attack could come
from anywhere at any time.
Yeah. We're in real danger here.
- ["The Vampire" by Archie King playing]
- He's a vampire
A bumpkin?
No. A pumpkin. With a "P."
It belonged to your grandmother,
Josephine Hawthorne.
That wasn't no pumpkin. It was a turnip.
No, actually,
I'm pretty sure it was a pumpkin.
I know a soddin' turnip
when I see one, Chachi.
- Chachi?
- Miss Hawthorne.
Can you tell us about the turnip?
Ah It It was a long time ago.
[Howard sighs]
I got this, Syd.
Look.
I don't wanna be here
any longer than I have to be, so
[gasps]
[Howard] Oh!
Take it easy.
You can have this
after you tell my daughter
everything she wants to know.
- [grunts]
- [Howard] Okay?
[woman in background] How y'all doing?
You need any juice?
It was a dark and stormy night.
Of course it was.
-Why is it never humid and sunny-
-Oh my God
Okay, go.
Mystics from all over the world
showed up to our house
at the behest of my Grandma Jo.
[thunder crackling]
[man] Madam Hawthorne.
Hurry, we don't have much time.
It's almost midnight.
[clock ticking]
[Victoria] Their plan
was to use her grimoire,
a book of ancient spells.
All right. Let's get to bewitching.
[group chanting]
[Victoria] They held a sance
to conjure the spirit himself
and finally put an end
to the curse of Stingy Jack.
Wait. Stingy Jack. He's real?
[laughs] He's real, all right.
I seen him with my own two eyes.
With those two eyes? [Scoffs]
- [whispering] Stop.
- Okay, I'm sorry. Continue.
[Victoria] That old lantern
was a gift from the devil himself.
- [laughing]
- [group gasps]
[Victoria] 'Twas what allowed Jack to move
between this world and the spirit world
so that every Halloween,
he could torment
the folks of Bridge Hollow.
But the deal was he could only stay here
from sundown till midnight.
Midnight, Eastern Standard Time?
- Dad.
- What?
But Jack wasn't satisfied
with just one night a year.
He wanted every night to be Halloween.
[laughing maniacally]
Turns out there was a loophole.
Jack could stay in our world forever,
free to spread his mayhem
if, at the stroke of midnight,
he found another soul
to take his place in the ever after.
[dramatic music playing]
[screaming, struggling]
[Victoria] But on Halloween night, 1927,
my Grandma Jo put an end
to the old bastard's plan.
[shouting magic spell]
[Stingy Jack roaring]
Using magic
to trap the ghost of Stingy Jack
inside his own lantern.
So long, Jack.
[blows]
As long as that old lantern remains unlit,
you kids got
nothing at all to worry about.
Ew!
What if we kind of sort of relit it?
Oh, then you're screwed.
- [Emily] Hey, Tammy, how are you?
- Not great.
Been getting lots of reports
of decorations
going missing from people's lawns.
Those Oaktown hoodlums
sure love pulling pranks.
- So, what do we have here?
- Oh, well, help yourself.
Everything you see here
is gluten-free, soy-free, and vegan.
Oh. Just what people want on Halloween.
Healthy snacks.
Here. Try this.
It is a red velvet muffin
made with beetroot
instead of artificial dyes.
Hmm.
Wow.
You can really taste the beetroot.
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
You got your beet. You got your root.
All mixed in there.
- Yes.
- Hey, have you seen our Stingy Jack?
No
[gagging]
[swallowing]
So the winner
of the pumpkin carving contest
- Mm-hmm.
- gets placed on top as the head.
[coughs, spits]
[Emily gasps]
I'm gonna go get
something to wash it down.
Whoo. Gets gets you in a choke hold.
So, what do you think?
I think Crypt Keeper fairy girl
is one bird short of a cuckoo clock.
And that old lantern is clearly a pumpkin.
Dad. Seriously?
What if Victoria's telling the truth?
What if it wasn't Madam Hawthorne
I was talking to on that Ouija board?
What if it was Stingy Jack who tricked me
into finding his old lantern.
Then, when I relit it,
I woke him up or let him out,
and now he's making all
the Halloween decorations come to life.
Oh, come on, Syd.
Halloween decorations coming to life?
That's just not something that happens.
[woman screaming]
[snarling]
Now that is a great costume.
[mysterious music playing]
[snarling]
[all gasp]
Kind of poor taste
for a nursing home though.
[growls]
Nope, not today.
[growling]
Oh, wow.
That looks just like
an Australian funnel-web spider.
Atrax robust us. [Clicks tongue]
Um
Is that bad?
Well, it would be. If it was real.
[chuckles] Good thing these
are just plastic.
Boop! [Chuckles]
[spider chittering]
[spiders screeching]
They're alive! [Screaming]
- [grim reaper growling]
- [residents screaming]
It's impossible.
[screaming continues]
Oh!
[man screaming]
Stay here.
Okay.
Uh
Aha!
[screaming] Ah!
Hey, Syd! Pop quiz.
What chemicals found
in common household cleaning supplies
can be combined
to create a highly acidic solvent?
Maybe now is not the time
for a science lesson!
You got a good point there.
[grunting, roaring]
[chuckles]
I had it set to "mist."
It would've been
so much cooler if it was "spray."
[grunting, roaring]
[spider squeals]
[grunting, roaring]
[roaring]
[spiders squealing]
[roaring]
Syd!
Oh!
[grunting]
[man] Get out! Get out!
[woman] Go! Go! Go! Go!
[woman 2] Oh my God! Please help me.
[grim reaper snarls]
[man 2] Hey, Death. He's older than me.
[Syd] The hydrogen peroxide
combines with the acetic acid in bleach
to make peracetic acid.
Super corrosive.
[door opens]
[tense music playing]
Oh no.
Wasn't there a giant spider on the roof
when we walked in?
[both screaming]
[spider snarling]
Syd!
[grunts]
Come on. Come on!
[spider hissing]
Oh sh...
[screaming]
[grunting]
[screaming]
- [spider hissing]
- [Howard screaming]
[hissing and screaming continue]
Whoa!
[screaming continues]
[Howard grunts]
Okay. Easy, spider. Okay, listen.
I I know you're pissed.
I hated the ending of Charlotte's Web too.
They did Charlotte dirty.
It should've been the pig.
[Howard grunts]
[wincing]
[struggling]
[screams]
[muffled scream]
[struggling]
Hey. Itsy-Bitsy.
[spider squealing]
- We've got to get out of here.
- [muffled] Okay.
Okay.
There's definitely something
unusual going on in Bridge Hollow.
Oh, you think?
[panting] But there has to be
a logical, scientific explanation.
Did you not just see
what happened in there?
[exhales deeply]
No, I I saw it.
And clearly,
there's something crazy going on.
But just because it's crazy
doesn't mean it can't be explained.
What are you talking about?
[mysterious music playing]
Dad, what is it?
It was Halloween 1985.
My friends and I,
we were out trick-or-treating
when they dared me to go
into this abandoned building
to prove I wasn't chicken.
But I made a wrong step.
I fell through the floorboards
into the basement.
And that's when I saw them.
Skeletons.
Hundreds.
They were everywhere.
And they were alive.
If that happened to you then,
why don't you think it's happening now?
Because it didn't happen to me.
A month later, I'm in science class.
My teacher tells us that a concussion
can cause temporary hallucinations.
And that was the answer.
From that day on,
I knew everything had an explanation.
- It was science. Not magic.
- So
It's "eureka!" Not "abracadabra."
Then explain to me
how Granddaddy Long Legs came alive
and tried to eat us.
Well,
maybe it was a gas leak
causing mass hallucinations.
Or maybe it's Stingy Jack.
Well, whatever it is
it's spreading like a virus.
Which makes sense.
Because it did start with a bat.
Okay, hear me out. Let's just say
hypothetically, this is Jack.
Victoria said her grandmother
trapped Jack inside that old lantern.
Maybe we could do the same thing.
- Re-trap him.
- Okay, let's say you're right.
Hypothetically, how do we go about
doing something completely fictional
and not at all real,
like trapping a ghost?
I don't know.
But I know some kids who might.
["Somebody's Watching Me"
by Rockwell playing]
I'm just an average man
With an average life
I work from 9 to 5
Hey, hell, I pay the price
All right, Syd. Stay close.
Syd. Syd. Sydney.
That's not close!
Hey, guys.
Thanks again for helping me tonight.
- Where are we?
- [Ramona] Here's what we know.
If you wanna trap a ghost,
you're gonna need a spell.
Preferably an old-world
Romani binding spell.
- Know any Gypsy witches?
- Not any that are still alive.
Uh Is that your dad?
[Howard] Sydney!
Ah.
Yeah.
Dad, guys. Guys, Dad.
Hi. What's up, players?
Dap it up. Sideways. No?
No love? Okay.
[chuckles] I like the costumes.
Nice. Let me guess.
Uh [inhales deeply] Power Rangers.
Madonna.
Uh Puerto Rican Prince.
You are so old.
[gasps]
So anything else?
Yeah. I, uh, found this article online
that says when Madam Hawthorne died,
they auctioned off some of her stuff.
One of the items listed is
her old grimoire. Spell book.
I know.
That's it! Dad, we need that book.
Okay, Rico Suave,
does the article say who bought it?
Yeah. This fancy-pants antiques dealer.
Sheldon Skinner.
Oh, wait, guys. Skinner's here.
Uh, he's wearing a Harvard sweatshirt
and some of those go-to-hell pants.
He bought tickets for the Kreepy Karnevil
in the pumpkin patch.
Then we have to split up.
Okay. Take these.
What are go-to-hell pants?
And am I wearing them?
[evil laughing]
Did you really mean what you said earlier
about quitting the science team?
Dad, I don't know.
It was really fun when I was younger,
and it was obvious
you really wanted me to do it.
Just like you really wanted me
to do karate.
Step right up, ladies and ghouls,
to a freak-tacular sideshow
of thrills and chills,
here in the Kreepy Karnevil.
That's not how you spell
either of those words.
[mysterious music playing]
[bat screeching]
Dad.
Look.
That means Jack is here.
[bat screeching]
- [snarling]
- [grunting]
[grunting]
- What's wrong with you?
- [gasps]
Why would you do that?
I am so sorry.
We thought you were someone else.
Oh my God
Oh, baby. I know. Okay. [Speaks gibberish]
[screams]
- [laughing]
- [clown nose honking]
Yeah, you never really liked clowns.
Especially ones with axes.
[evil laughing]
[axe scraping]
Yeah.
[growling]
[screaming]
[Howard] Wait, Syd!
They're just actors.
[evil laugh]
[Howard] Hey.
[growls]
I don't think you're allowed
to touch me unless I sign a waiver.
[growls]
[Howard] Hey. Okay.
Let's calm down now.
Just knocked
your little infant friend out.
- [growls]
- [axe clanking]
- [grunting, laughing]
- [nose honking]
- [groans]
- [clown laughs evilly]
These aren't actors?
[growls]
[grunts]
[clown laughs evilly]
[grunts]
Sydney, they aren't actors!
- Repeat! The clowns are not actors!
- [clown continues laughing]
[Ramona] So you no longer have the book.
No, I sold it a while ago.
I'd assumed Hawthorne's effects
were of some value,
but apparently,
the only people who care about that junk
are nutjobs and occultists.
[gasps] No offense.
When you say occultists,
you mean like Satanists?
Not like.
Precisely.
Do you remember
the name of the person you sold it to?
No, I don't remember his name,
but he had a shipping address
I will never forget.
666 Elm Street.
[snorts] Like I said, nutjobs.
[scoffs]
[Ramona] Let's go
to the ticket booth first.
- If she's not there...
- Killer clowns! Killer clowns!
- Uh, Sydney, what's going on?
- Stingy Jack! He's here!
- What?
- Where?
Everywhere!
- [kids screaming]
- [growling]
[Howard] Syd! No!
It's called the Halls of Horror.
Why couldn't you just go
to the pumpkin patch?
[suspenseful music playing]
[all panting]
- [snorting]
- [all screaming]
[suspenseful music continues]
It's a dead end.
- [growls]
- [all screaming]
- [screams]
- Guys! Over here!
[screams]
Okay. Which way?
Eeny, meeny, miney
[Syd] Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
[evil laughing]
Sydney!
[Syd] Dad?
Sydney!
[screaming]
[evil laughing]
[Syd] Dad!
[Howard] Sydney!
Dad?
Dad?
- [screams]
- Hey! Hey. It's me. It's me.
Dad!
- It's okay, kiddo.
- Look, there's an exit sign.
We're almost out.
[suspenseful music playing]
[axe scraping]
All right. Back up. Back up.
Okay, Bozo. I'm gonna wipe
that crooked smile right off your face.
Come on. Come on.
Let you know, Homey don't play that.
[Howard grunts]
[clown laughs evilly, grunts]
Oh!
Dad!
[all gasp]
- [Howard] Get him.
- [gasp]
Ow!
[gasps]
[grunting]
[all gasp]
[all groan]
[Howard laughing]
Oh, night night!
Oh, oh! Nice!
You know, I softened him up for you,
but, uh, way to finish the job.
Sure, you did.
[nervously] Um, guys?
- [growling]
- Hey.
Why does a clown need an axe anyway?
Go!
To the right! That way!
We parked out front.
[tense music playing]
[laughing evilly]
- Okay, now what?
- Um, plan B. Bikes!
Well, that would be great
if my dad knew how to ride a bike.
You don't know how to ride a bike?
I was taught books could take me
wherever I needed to go.
- [groaning]
- [clown snarling]
Okay, bikes it is. Go! Go! Go!
[bike bell dings]
This thing is growing exponentially.
Each creature spreads it to another,
which spreads it to another and another.
At its current rate, it'll take over
Bridge Hollow by midnight.
And according to Victoria,
if we can't stop Jack by then,
he could find a soul to swap for his own.
Then every day will be Halloween.
- Maybe we should call the police.
- Dad.
Do you really think
the cops are going to believe any of this?
- You didn't even believe it.
- Because it doesn't make sense.
Not everything has to, Dad.
[cheering in the distance]
And now the moment
you've all been waiting for.
Who will be the face
of this year's Stingy Jack?
[exhales deeply]
And the winner is
Dan Brown!
[crowd cheers]
Oh my God! Oh my God!
In your face, Gary! In your face!
I did it, Ma! I did it!
We gotta! We gotta!
- Tammy
- No, no, no, no.
Now let's get this guy up
on old Stingy Jack.
[crowd continues cheering]
Discos don't open till after dark
And it ain't till twelve
Till the party really starts
And I always had to be home by ten
Right before the fun
Was about to begin
Crowds of people
Lined up inside and out
Just one reason, to rock the house
But in the daytime
The streets were clear
You couldn't find
A good freak anywhere, 'cause
The freaks come out at night
The freaks come out at night
- Okay, this is it.
- No! No, no, no, no, no, no!
[screaming, grunting]
[grunting]
[muffled] Okay.
[spitting]
I'm gonna assume that wasn't intentional.
[gasps]
Bones.
Why does it have to be bones?
Um You know, maybe
maybe I'll just stay right here.
What? No, come on.
[groaning]
[panting]
[groans]
[grunts, pants]
Whoa!
[strains]
[groans]
[gasping]
[sighs]
Okay.
Are we sure about this?
I've never met
a real devil worshiper before.
Should we be wearing
crucifixes or something?
Only one way to find out.
[doorbell rings]
[all] Principal Floyd?
Well, hey there, everyone.
And, Howard, what a pleasant surprise.
You all trick-or-treating tonight?
Well, you're in luck
because this year, I've got
Miniature toothpastes.
["I Put a Spell on You"
by Screamin' Jay Hawkins playing]
I put a spell on you
- So, uh, Floyd.
- Uh-huh.
What are you some type
of Satanist or something?
- Oh jeepers. No, Howard.
- [gasps] What the hell?
I'm a principal in a very small town
with a very big Christian population.
No, no, no. I just, uh, collect things.
You know, some people collect stamps.
Some people collect butterflies.
I collect objects
related to the eternal damnation
of the human soul.
Aha!
I believe this
is what you're looking for.
Okay, here it is.
"Captus Exspiravit."
"Cum his verbis O spirit us."
Dad. You know Latin. What does it say?
[clears throat]
With these words, O spirit,
I banish you to captivity
binding you to blah, blah, blah, blah
Right on. So how does it work?
Well, it's your typical,
run-of-the-mill binding spell.
You find a nice receptacle, right?
Then you get close enough to your target.
Be careful.
Then you say these magic words, and boom.
- You've trapped yourself a ghost.
- How close do we need to get?
I don't know. I mean, look,
there's no hard-and-fast rules
with these things.
I do know this.
When you say this spell,
you have to believe it.
- [both] Mm-hmm.
- I mean, truly believe it.
In your bones.
[loud banging]
[banging]
[banging]
Please tell me you ordered pizza.
[suspenseful music playing]
Oh, you must not tip well.
[gasps]
[skeletons groaning]
[skeletons growling]
[tense music playing]
[screaming]
- [Floyd] Let's go, move it.
- [all whimpering]
[grunts]
[growling]
[grunts]
- You just had to put helmets on them?
- I thought it would be cute.
[Floyd grunts]
[grunting]
[skeletons hissing, growling]
[grunts]
[straining]
[Mario] Sydney! Save the grimoire!
- [Mario grunting]
- [skeleton groaning]
[grunting]
[Ramona panting]
[Jamie] Get the book out of here.
[Syd grunts]
[Syd grunts]
Syd!
I got it!
[dramatic music playing]
The spell!
- We gotta get out of here.
- [Floyd] We can get out the back.
No! Dad, we have to get that spell.
It's the only way we can fix this.
We can't fix anything if we're dead.
Now, come on and bring your little ass.
[Syd panting]
- [Howard] Let's go! Let's go! Come on!
- Hurry!
[all screaming]
Go! Get in the basement!
Go! Go! Go!
[grunting] Get in the basement!
- Go!
- [Howard] Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
[Floyd screaming]
[Syd panting]
[straining]
[Jamie] Mario, help him!
[gasping]
[grunting]
Dad. Do something!
[Floyd groaning]
Dad! What is wrong with you?
[groaning]
The skeletons.
- They're coming through.
- What do we do?
[Syd] So it's unexplainable.
So what? They're real.
You know what you can do
to something that's real?
You can kick its ass.
[chuckles]
You can take the girl out of Brooklyn,
but you can't take Brooklyn
out the girl.
[skeletons screeching]
[Howard] Hey, Syd! Pop quiz.
You know what the chainsaw
was originally called?
[door cracking]
A bone cutter.
["Highway to Hell" by AC/DC playing]
[chainsaw engine starts]
Yeah.
This will do just fine.
Livin' easy
[screaming]
Season ticket on a one-way ride
[screams]
Hey, mama, look at me
I'm on the way to the promised land
[screaming]
Highway to hell
- [grunting]
- [screaming]
I'm on the highway to hell
[screaming, grunting]
[engine whirring intensifies]
[engine sputters]
Whoa!
[grunts, screams]
Hmm? What the hell?
[shrieking]
Ahhh!
[shrieking]
Whoo!
Whoo, whoo, whoo. Whoo!
[grunting]
Ah!
[shrieking]
[Howard] Ahhh!
[cracking]
- Ahhh!
- [cracking]
[Howard sighs]
[music ends]
Holy Lucifer, Howard.
[panting]
Sydney, I take back
everything I said about your dad.
That was the coolest thing
I've ever seen in my whole life.
[sentimental music playing]
Boy, I hope somebody
remembers these words.
[dramatic music playing]
[evil laughing]
What was that?
[Jamie] The Halloween decorations.
They're gone.
[Floyd] But where did they go?
The Stingy Jack Festival.
He's building an army.
[both] Mom.
These right here, Father,
are egg-free coconut-pineapple scones.
- Ah, that's a home run, huh?
- Yes!
[crunching]
[grunts]
So.
I'm really not supposed to lie.
[Tammy] Yeah! Love it!
Mm-mm.
Oh, there's our pumpkin. Come on!
[crowd cheering, whistling]
Well guess it's time
to call it a night. [Chuckles]
[Tammy] Let's hear it for Stingy Jack!
[crowd cheering]
[all chanting] Stingy Jack.
Stingy Jack. Stingy Jack.
[suspenseful music playing]
[Howard] Which way do we go?
It's still a few more blocks that way.
Or we can take the shortcut.
Through the cemetery.
Okay. Let's go.
Oh, please tell me
they don't decorate the cemeteries here.
[suspenseful music continues]
Hey, Syd. What are you doing?
- Come on, we have to find your mom.
- And then what, Dad?
Stingy Jack has completely taken over
Bridge Hollow.
And without Madam Hawthorne's spell,
we can't stop him.
We need that spell.
What are you thinking?
I don't know, guys.
I led the weekend sance
at the community center a few times,
but that was years ago.
Please, you have to try.
Okay. Um, everybody, take hands.
Oh! I can't believe I'm doing this.
But I am so here for it.
You know, channeling the energy.
- Whatever.
- Thank you.
[clears throat]
Close your eyes.
Uh, now again,
I'm very much out of practice...
[speaking Latin]
[Floyd] Everyone.
[all speaking Latin]
[gasps]
[all gasp]
[Jaime] Whoa.
Miss Hawthorne?
Miss Josephine Hawthorne.
Are you in here?
Can you hear me?
[Josephine] Of course I hear you, child.
[in Josephine's voice] I'm not deaf.
I'm dead.
Hell's bells, what have I done?
This is so going on TikTok.
Um, I released Stingy Jack.
[in Josephine's voice] You did what?
It is my honor as mayor of Bridge Hollow
to light this year's Stingy Jack.
Yeah. Light it up!
[crowd cheering]
[electrical crackling]
[crowd gasps]
[man] What on earth?
- [man 2] Not good.
- [woman] What's going on?
All right, everyone.
Must have just blown a fuse or something.
- [woman 2] Is somebody trippin'?
- [woman 3] That is weird.
What the H-E-C-K is that?
[dramatic music playing]
[screeching]
Is this part of the show?
Beats me, Father.
[squawking]
[crowd gasping]
[witch laughing]
[in Josephine's voice] I can't believe
you nitwits
brought that dusty old demon back to life.
What are you going to do next?
Bring back the black plague?
I don't know.
You realize
he's going to try to do it again?
To find a soul to take back
and trade with the devil
so he can take over the world?
But this time,
he won't let anyone stop him.
We can stop him.
[in Josephine's voice] Oh!
And how do you propose to do this?
You gonna hit him
with your little broomstick?
- Cast a little spell?
- Exactly.
[scoffs]
[Syd] The binding spell from your book.
If you tell us the words,
we can use it to re-trap Jack
and put him away forever.
[sighs]
[in Josephine's voice] As you wish.
Cum his verbis O spirit us
te ad captivitatem eccio.
Captivitatem.
Adligans te ad flammam diabalit.
[Ramona] Got it.
Mm-hmm.
[Josephine's voice] Good for you.
Now can I please go back to being dead?
Oh, uh, yes, I'm sorry.
[clears throat, speaking Latin]
Uh [speaks Latin hesitantly]
[Josephine's voice] Oh, for the love of...
Where did you learn this?
From a Cracker Jack box?
Amateurs.
[snaps fingers]
- [in normal voice] What just happened?
- Huh?
[sniffs]
Why do I smell like an old white lady?
I know what's going on here.
It's those degenerates from Oaktown
trying to sabotage our festival again.
Well, not this year.
Nuh-uh.
- [growls]
- [Tammy] You can't hide behind that mask.
I could smell
an Oaktownie from a mile away.
You know why?
Because you reek of sour grapes.
- [man] It's a bunch of Oaktownies.
- [Tammy] We don't want you here.
We don't want any of you weird freaks.
[evil laughing]
[grunts]
- [crowd gasps]
- [evil laughing]
You shouldn't have done that, clown boy.
[growling]
- [Syd gasps] They're everywhere.
- [Mario] I'm starting to hate Halloween.
[Ramona] We got this.
Oh, Syd. Look. Over there.
Mom's booth. Come on.
[whispering] Quiet. Quiet.
[bat fluttering, squealing]
[bat squealing]
[ethereal crackling]
[flame explodes]
[crowd gasping]
Oh, dear Lord.
Where is she? Where's Mom?
I don't know!
And where's all the muffins
and cookies and stuff?
Maybe she sold them all
and then went home.
[scoffs]
Okay, Syd. Pop quiz.
Where is
the big pumpkin-headed statue thing
that was there just a minute ago?
He's gone.
What time is it?
It's almost midnight.
Dad, we need to find Jack
before he takes someone's soul
back to the spirit world,
or else we're screwed.
No, he can't.
If he wants to trade a soul
with the devil,
he needs the lantern.
And the lantern is back at the
[ominous music playing]
[cork twisting]
["Back to That" by Jared Lee
playing in the background]
[clattering in distance]
Hello?
[distant bang]
[mysterious music playing]
[laughing] I'm trippin'. I'm trippin'.
[chuckling]
So no one wants my baked goods.
Well, more for me.
Mmm.
[suspenseful music playing]
[whispering] Dad.
- What?
- What are you doing?
[panting] I'm looking for wheels.
A car, a truck, something.
Anything.
[groans]
[mumbles] I don't know.
Check for keys. Check.
- [panting] Okay. Come on
- Nothing.
[scoffs] Hey. Never do this.
[grunts]
Bypassing the ignition
allows the positively charged battery
to push the negatively charged electrons
to the starter and
[engine starts]
- [whispers] Eureka.
Mm-hmm.
Don't tell Mom about this.
[chuckles]
All right.
Let's go.
[engine accelerates]
[brakes screeching]
What are they doing?
Why are they just standing there?
The last time Jack tried to steal a soul,
Madam Hawthorne stopped him.
So this time, he's using his army
to make sure no one gets in his way.
He'll keep us here till midnight
then attack.
Yeah. Well, lucky for us,
we're driving this Cucurbita pepo.
- Or, in layman's terms
- A squash.
Hang on.
- [engine accelerates]
- [tires screeching]
[suspenseful music continues]
[both shout]
[Howard screams]
Oh, here comes Charlotte!
[both screaming]
[tires screeching]
Oh!
[crowd gasps]
Well, there goes
this year's safest small town in the US.
Yes!
Whoo!
[bat screeching]
["What It Beats For" by Jared Lee
playing in the background]
[crunching]
That is really hard.
- Ugh.
- [clanking on plate]
[suspenseful music building]
[growling]
[screaming]
[grunts]
[screaming]
[growling]
[growls]
- [growls]
- [screams]
[panting]
Brains. Brains.
- Brains. Brains.
- [tires screeching]
Cum his verbis O spirit us
Cum his verbis O spirit us.
I tried to get you to learn Latin.
Remember?
Dad, Latin is literally a dead language,
and at that time, it seemed useless.
Well, it's not so useless now, is it?
[tense music playing]
[breathing shakily]
[heavy footsteps approaching]
[growls]
[tires screeching]
- You ready? Okay.
- Ready.
- [Sully] Hi, neighbor!
- Oh!
[laughing] Wondering what I'm doing
in your bushes, right?
I'm not hiding if that's what you think.
- Yeah, you are.
- I'm not scared of anything.
- You know what I mean? All right.
- That's nice.
Hey, turns out you were right.
I didn't turn into a zombie, huh?
- Lucky you.
- [laughs] Halloween, baby.
[door closes]
[suspenseful music playing]
- Oh!
- Oh! Oh
It's your husband!
- Honey?
- What was in that muffin? Cement?
I get it. I get it. Baking isn't
[growls] Look out!
[gasping]
Mom!
[Emily screaming, struggling]
[gasping]
[grunts]
He breathes fire now?
[evil laughing]
[Syd] Come on.
- [bat squealing]
- Oh! Syd! Back up! Back up! Back up!
Okay. All right.
You distract the bat. I'll save Mom.
But, Dad, I have to do the spell.
Listen. It is too dangerous in there.
Now, I am still your father,
and sometimes I still need to protect you.
Okay?
[eerie music playing]
- [bat screeching]
- [Howard screaming]
- Go! Save Mom! I got this.
- Okay.
[tense music playing]
- [bat screeching]
- [witches laughing]
All right, Oaktownies! Come get some!
[snarling, laughing]
I don't think
you should be encouraging them, dear.
[Tammy] Don't get some! Don't get some!
I changed my mind.
[priest] Stay back!
I'm thinking these things
ain't from Oaktown.
[bat screeching]
[Emily screaming]
[Syd] Dad! Hurry!
We're running out of time!
[bat screeching]
[grunts]
[wincing] Ow.
All right, rat-face.
Round two. Ding ding.
- [bat screeching]
- [Emily screaming]
[Stingy Jack laughing evilly]
[Emily] Oh no! No!
Let me go!
Let me go!
Let me go!
[screaming]
[gasps]
I got you.
Cum his verbis O spirit us
te ad captivitatem eccio.
Adligans te ad flammam diabalit.
[both screaming]
[Stingy Jack laughing evilly]
Cum his verbis O spirit us
te ad captivitatem eccio.
Adligans te ad flammam diabalit.
- [Stingy Jack growls]
- [Howard grunts]
- Howard!
- I'm trying.
Dad, hurry!
At midnight his army is going to attack!
I've said the spell!
Twice! It's not working!
You have to truly believe!
[clock ticking loudly]
Dad! You can do it! I know you can!
[bat screeching]
[grunts]
Now cast that frigging spell!
[grunting]
With these words, O spirit,
I banish you to captivity
[growls]
binding you to the devil's flame!
- [Howard grunting]
- [Emily gasping]
[growling]
[Emily gasping]
[ethereal crackling]
- [thudding]
- [both gasping]
Abracadabra.
[clock ticks loudly]
[bell tolling]
[crowd gasping]
[crowd groaning]
[crowd gasps]
[electrical whirring]
- They did it!
- They trapped him!
Oh, thank God.
I thought they were screwed for sure.
[all laughing]
[Floyd grunting]
You see that?
I'm on a new team, baby!
- [crowd cheers]
- Welcome, son.
Thank you. [Laughing]
Well-done, Oaktown. Well-done.
We'll see you next year.
[man] See you next year.
[crowd cheering]
[Emily grunts]
[crackling]
[both screaming]
[groaning, spitting]
Oh!
[spitting]
[laughing]
- That's funny?
- Yes.
[tense music playing]
So long, Jack.
[tense music ends]
[Mario] Wow, Mr. Gordon.
I mean, I just wish I could've been there
to see you whip Stingy Jack's ass.
Sorry, I meant "butt."
Nah, that's okay. I did whoop his ass.
- [laughing]
- [clears throat]
I meant, we whooped his ass.
It was a team effort.
All right, who wants some cinnamon rolls?
Whoo!
- [Ramona and Jamie] Thank you!
- Good luck.
[Syd laughing]
[Ramona] Wow!
These are amazing.
- [Mario] Incredible.
- [Syd and Howard] They are?
You should open a shop, Mrs. Gordon.
Wait a second.
Hmm.
Yo, what'd you put in this?
Butter, sugar, gluten.
[Howard and Emily laughing]
I figured, after last night,
life's too short.
I'm just happy that Halloween is over.
You thought last night was crazy?
You should see
what this town does for Christmas.
[both] Christmas?
[unenthusiastically] Ho ho ho.
[serene music playing]
I still say we should destroy that thing
and be done with it.
Dad, we went over this.
If we destroy the lantern, we...
We could release Jack again.
I know. I know.
But see, that's why I got this.
Ammonium phosphate.
Flame retardant.
Better be safe than sorry.
Sounds like someone's a believer.
[Howard chuckles] Hey.
Here.
You want me to lock it?
Yeah, and then I want you
to take the key and keep it safe.
You're old enough now.
You're old enough to do a lot of things.
And I'mma try my best to remember that.
Thanks, Dad.
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
[laughs]
You wanna join in or what?
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Ja...
[mysterious music playing]
[mysterious music intensifies]
- Oh, hell, no.
- Oh, hell, no.
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
Old woman, old woman
Don't treat me so mean
You're the meanest old woman
That I've ever seen
I guess if you say so
- I'll have to pack my things and go
- That's right
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
Now, baby, listen, baby
Don't ya treat me this way
'Cause I'll be back
On my feet someday
Don't care if you do
'Cause it's understood
You ain't got no money
You just ain't no good
Well, I guess if you say so
- I'll have to pack my things and go
- That's right
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
- Well
- Don't you come back no more
Uh, what you say?
- Don't you come back no more
- I didn't understand you
Don't you come back no more
You can't mean that
- And don't you come back no more
- Oh, now, baby, please
- Don't you come back no more
- What you trying to do to me?
Don't you come back no more
[song fades out]
["The Tale Of Stingy Jack" by Baraka May
and The Pinewood Singers playing]
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
The magic works if you believe
So cast the spell to make him leave
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
To rid the world of Stingy Jack
Just cast the spell and send him back
Cast the spell and send him back
[mysterious music playing]
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
The magic works if you believe
So cast the spell to make him leave
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
To rid the world of Stingy Jack
Just cast the spell and send him back
Cast the spell and send him back
[song ends]
[mysterious music playing]
["Hit the Road Jack"
by Ray Charles playing]
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
[man] Come on! Sing with us.
Sorry, Dad, but a family sing-along
isn't gonna make me
feel better about moving.
[sighs]
Look, Syd.
I know you're gonna miss Brooklyn. Okay?
But you won't miss the smell
of hydrogen sulfide every morning.
[laughing]
Because Bridge Hollow
smells like [inhales] apples
and a hint of white privilege.
And it was named "safest small town
in the US" last ten years running. So
Give Bridge Hollow a chance.
Small towns can be full of surprises.
And speaking of surprises
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
[screaming] What you say?
Uh, what you say?
Don't you come back no more
I didn't understand you
Don't you come back no more
[mystical music playing]
Whoa!
[sinister laughing]
What?
[pirate voice] Ahoy there, matey!
[sci-fi music playing]
Is it me,
or did we just drive in to a Party City?
[sighs]
[witches laughing]
[mom] Look! There it is.
[dad] Home sweet home.
Hey, Syd! Pop quiz.
If we left Brooklyn
20 minutes after the movers,
and they show up in the next two,
how much faster did we...
Whoa! Check out those zombies!
[dad] Oh yeah. Okay.
That's not disturbing at all.
Hey, babe, let's not invite
those neighbors over for dinner.
[mom laughs]
Dad, since we're not living
in an apartment anymore,
maybe we can finally decorate
our house for Halloween!
[groans] Uh
- You didn't answer my question.
- Mom, can we get a ruling?
- Yes, I mean...
- You gonna take me to Family Court?
It would be nice to fit in
with the neighborhood.
But, you know, we're gonna be so busy
moving in and getting ready for school.
- The court rules in favor of Dad.
- Mmm.
I'm sorry, baby.
Maybe next year?
[Syd] The system's rigged.
[truck approaching]
Okay. Let's go.
[dad] It's the movers!
[mysterious music playing]
[door creaking]
[loud bang]
[mysterious music continues]
Careful. Fragile package.
- [mom] Ha, ha, ha. Thank you.
- [chuckling]
- Kid's room. Upstairs.
- Okay.
Hey, neighbor! What's shakin'?
John Sullivan.
But everyone around here calls me Sully.
Except for my ex-wife.
I don't wanna tell you what she calls me.
- Howard Gordon. My wife calls me "honey."
- [Sully laughs]
- That's That's tough.
- Yeah.
Well, hey, listen,
you picked a hell of a time to move in.
As you can see, everybody around here
kind of goes crazy around Halloween, huh?
Yeah. It's a little ridiculous, right?
[laughs]
Huh?
No, I meant, uh, "crazy" as in "good."
- [chuckles] Oh yeah. I...
- Yeah.
- Really? Yeah.
- Yeah! Yeah.
See, the way it works here
is everybody kind of picks a theme,
and then you go big-time on that theme.
Really lean into it.
You gotta commit.
This year, I pulled out all the stops.
The Walking Dead. [Laughing]
- Booyah!
- Yeah
Not a fan. They jumped the shark
when they killed Glenn.
Yeah, that was a loss for everybody.
[kisses]
- [exhales] So you got a theme?
- No.
- You like werewolves?
- Not particularly.
'Cause I got
a whole shed full of werewolves.
That's real wolf fur.
I don't even know if it's legal.
And I don't care. 'Cause it's Halloween.
Uh, no, thanks. We're good.
- Really?
- We don't decorate.
Jehovah's Witness.
No, I just think it's kind of silly.
[scoffs]
- What?
- Do you still believe in Santa Claus?
[laughs]
Why? What have you heard? Is he okay?
Nice meeting you.
Great meeting you too, Howard.
Hey, you want that werewolf?
I can get that werewolf into your yard
in five minutes. It's not a problem.
- No, I'm-We're good.
- Wife got you on a short
- [choking] Yeah, I get it.
- [Howard] Go. Turn around. Keep going.
[Sully howling]
So, how unhappy
do you think Syd is about the move?
One to ten?
They haven't invented
a scale big enough to measure this one.
[chuckles]
I don't know.
I feel like she's turning into somebody
I don't even recognize anymore.
Well, that's what teenagers do, baby.
They they grow up.
They become their own person.
And you have to let her.
And what's that supposed to mean?
You pushed her to be on the science team.
Yeah, because she loves science.
And science
Is awesome.
She wanted to take ballet.
Right.
But now, our baby girl can defend herself.
You can't fight off a mugger
doing a pirouette.
Howard, this isn't Brooklyn.
The scariest things around here
are the decorations on people's lawns.
- [Howard sighs]
- Just
Give her some space.
[Howard sighs]
Okay.
[Howard grunts]
[mom sighs]
I'm putting it up.
[mystical music playing]
[indistinct chatter]
Look, Howard! Don't you think
that would be perfect for my bake shop?
Are you sure about this?
Running a bakery
is a lot different than being a lawyer.
I'm sure. I even decided on a name.
The Bridge Hollow Bakery.
Might wanna workshop that one.
- [Syd] Hey, Mom.
- Huh.
Are you gonna sell
things you normally make
or things that taste good?
Ha ha. I know you guys usually hate
on anything without gluten or butter,
but the PTA moms in Brooklyn
love my sugar-free pumpkin pie
with almond-powder crust.
- And this town is gonna love them too.
- [Howard] I'm sure they will.
- [horn honking rhythmically]
- Hey, there they are! The Gordons!
[chuckles] Baby?
Why does the crazy white lady
in the pumpkin car know who we are?
You're probably wondering,
"How does this crazy white lady
in a pumpkin car know who we are?"
- No Yeah.
- Tammy Rice. The mayor around here.
Don't be too impressed.
It's a volunteer position.
I also teach piano and drive an Uber.
You'd be surprised how many people
wanna ride in this pumpkin.
Hey, Howard, your first ride's on me, huh?
- [chuckling]
- Big science teacher from the big city!
Ah, no, thank you.
And what is all the signs up
for Stingy Jack?
Who is he? The town founder?
Wait, you've never heard of Stingy Jack?
[laughs] Okay. Well,
I turned his story into a sweater.
- So
- [sighs]
According to an old Irish legend,
there once lived
a wicked man named Stingy Jack.
And he was such a jerk
that the villagers finally had enough,
and [clicks tongue]
But the devil felt sorry for Jack,
so he made him a lantern.
A pumpkin carved out with a flame
from the fires of hell.
Hmm?
Every Halloween, Jack would return
to our town, Bridge Hollow,
to seek his revenge on the descendants
of the villagers who did him in.
Well, that's what we tell the tourists.
Am I right?
- [laughs]
- [laughs nervously]
Wait, so that's why
they call them jack-o'-lanterns!
[Howard] Hey, Syd, what do you say
we go hit up the local museum
where we can learn some actual facts.
[Syd] Uh, no. I'm gonna explore this town
and find something
that's actually fun to do.
She'll be fine.
Safest small town in the US, remember?
That's right, but don't let
any of those sore losers in Oaktown
hear you say that.
They didn't even make the top ten.
Uh, so, is there gonna be
any food at this festival?
Of course! Yeah, a lot
of the local stores are setting up booths.
We got hot dogs, funnel cakes,
chowder, everything.
Uh, is there gonna be
any artisanal vegan baked goods?
Hmm. I don't know what that means.
But sure, why not?
[indistinct chatter]
[mysterious music playing]
[clanging]
[tense music playing]
- [loud bang]
- [Syd gasps, grunts]
[girl] Whoa!
- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm good. Thanks.
What were you guys doing in there?
Grave-digging.
You can get really good money
on the dark web for a fully intact corpse.
I'm kidding. [Chuckles]
Show her, Mario.
Um, testing out
this new spectral EM four detection app.
It measures
electromagnetic field fluctuations.
Which is what happens
whenever the electrical charges in the air
are disturbed by a...
Ghost or other paranormal phenomena.
[chuckles] So, what are you guys?
Like, the Bridge Hollow High
Paranormal Society or something?
[exhales]
See? I told you the shirts were lame.
No, I like them.
Who is this girl?
Guys, don't be weird.
I'm Jamie. That's Ramona. This is Mario.
Sydney. [Chuckles]
Wait. Sydney Gordon?
You and your folks just moved
to the old Hawthorne house.
The what house?
Come on.
There's something you need to see.
Madam Hawthorne. One of the preeminent
spiritualist mediums of the 20th century.
She lived and died in your house.
Rumor has it she might still be there.
Wait, so I might live in a haunted house?
This place just got a lot cooler.
So, you're, like, into this kind of stuff.
Yeah. Kinda. I was gonna start
a Paranormal Club at my school, but
You didn't wanna be a social leper.
No. My dad wanted me
to join the science team instead.
Wow, he sounds so awesome.
So, have you experienced anything strange
in your house since you moved in?
- Cold drafts?
- Power fluctuations?
Voices from beyond the grave?
Well, I did hear
this weird noise the other night,
and it was
definitely not the house settling.
Well, in that case,
we have some homework for you.
[crickets chirping]
[sighs] Okay, not exactly sure
how this works,
but here goes nothing.
Madam Hawthorne.
Can you hear me?
[sighs]
[whooshing]
H
E
R
Here?
You're here?
[door creaking]
[door handle clicks]
[door creaking]
[glitches]
[tense music playing]
[door creaking]
Hello?
[floorboards creaking]
[tense music continues]
[door creaking]
[door slams shut]
"SJ 1927."
[tense music crescendos]
[mom] Ah!
Mmm.
[Syd] So you guys
are not gonna believe this,
but this house is totally haunted.
What?
- [Syd] No! For real!
- [Howard laughs]
By an old Gypsy woman named Hawthorne.
She used to live here in this house.
And for some reason,
she gave me her pumpkin, but
Oh, I get it. And that's why
we should move back to Brooklyn.
I'm not making this up.
Haven't you heard all the freaky noises?
It's an old house, sweetie.
Old houses are like old people.
- They make freaky noises.
- Yeah, and they're drafty.
It's the wood. It expands. It contracts.
It's not ghosts. It's science.
Let me tell you what happened.
I was using the Ouija board app...
Oh, come on. A Ouija board is nonsense,
and an app is even worse.
What's the ghost supposed to do?
Get a Wi-Fi password?
[laughs] Ow!
I don't know why I even bothered.
I should have known.
Known what?
That you would make fun of me
for believing in things like this.
Just like you always do.
I I do not. Do I do I make fun
You just did.
Well, it's not what I meant.
I just want you to start
looking at the world scientifically.
Then you'll realize
that all these crazy things
have a much more realistic explanation.
So you weren't making fun of me.
You just think I'm stupid. Okay.
Wait. I I didn't say you were stupid!
[door closes]
Just ignorant.
- [mom] I'm about to smack you.
- [gasps]
[indistinct chatter]
Oh! There he is! In the flesh.
The man, the myth, the legend.
Principal Pretty-Boy Floyd.
Good to see you again, buddy.
Thanks for the help getting us settled.
I appreciate it.
Oh, no, Howard.
Thank you for stepping in mid semester.
You really saved my behind.
Boy, when Mr. Viveros won the lottery
and took off
to Key West with his mistress,
it really put us in a pickle.
- [chuckling] Yeah
- Oh
- You don't play the lottery, do you?
- No.
Okay.
- And the marriage?
- Solid.
- Really?
- Jay-Z/Beyonc.
- I'll show you the classroom.
- All right.
[both laughing]
[Floyd] Well, here it is. [Chuckling]
Check it out.
Wow! We didn't have all this in Brooklyn.
- [Floyd] Yeah.
- This is great.
Brand-new microscopes.
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.
- Bunsen burner at every station.
- These are yours now.
- Thank you.
- We got a brand-new sterilizer here.
- Nice.
- Chemical cabinet, fully stocked.
- Okay.
[screaming]
- Whoa!
- [laughing]
Ah, look at this!
The kids on the science team
rigged this one up for you.
- You like it?
- No, no, no.
They call him Albert Spine-stein.
[laughing]
Get... Ooh.
Get Get him off.
That's funny.
Did we get you?
[laughing] Yeah, you got me.
Yeah, Howard. [Laughing]
Come on in, kids.
This is, uh, Mr. Gordon,
your new science teacher.
He'll be with you
for the rest of the semester.
Bring out the freaks
It's gonna be a helluva night
[Syd] I have never been so scared.
When I opened the trunk,
I thought it was gonna be,
like, this severed head inside.
Turned out it was
just some broke-ass pumpkin.
[all chuckling]
Oh, that reminds me. I.
I don't know
what you got planned for tonight,
but we'll be back up at the school,
working the
the "Halls of Horror." [chuckles]
You should come. It's sick.
We go every year.
So it's obviously super cool.
[Jamie] Okay. It's a little cheesy.
But everyone wears a costume,
and it's fun to check them all out.
Yeah, sounds really cool, guys,
but I don't really have a costume.
My family doesn't really do Halloween.
What does that even mean?
It's my dad's thing to hate on Halloween.
He says he thinks it's stupid.
[scoffs] This guy just doesn't get it.
But I honestly think,
for some dumb reason,
it actually freaks him out.
No pressure, but you know where to find us
if you change your mind.
- Okay.
- Bye.
[whimsical music playing]
Hmm. Screw it.
I'm your boogey man
That's what I am
I'm here to do whatever I can
Be it early morning
[evil laugh]
Late afternoon
Or at midnight
It's never too soon
To want to please you
To want to keep you
- Hey, do you want a headband?
- Oh! Thanks. [Chuckles]
I want to be your
Be your rubber ball
I want to be the one
Ya love most of all
Oh yeah
- [boy] Trick or treat!
- [screams]
Oh!
Oh!
Kid, never ever jump
out the bushes on a Black man.
Leave candy on your porch next time.
It's Halloween.
Boy, you better get
your little behind off my property.
[sighs]
Aw, come on, Sully.
A rubber bat.
[squeaks]
[groans]
[child in distance] Trick or treat!
[exhales]
Sydney!
[squeaks]
Hi, Dad.
Okay. [Chuckles]
Okay. I see what you're doing.
What am I doing?
If I had to guess,
I'd say trying to annoy me.
No, I'm trying to have fun.
Annoying you is just the bonus.
Look, I'm sorry if you thought
I was making fun of you.
And for moving me here.
- I did that for our family.
- And for treating me like a child.
You are a child.
Do you want to know something, Dad?
I'm done being treated like a baby.
I'm 14. I can make my own decisions,
starting with what holidays
I choose to celebrate.
Oh, and you know that science team
you love so much?
Yeah, well, I hate it, and I quit.
[gasps]
[Howard] Yeah?
Well, how about this?
You're grounded.
What? Why?
Because I'm your father, and I said so.
Now go to your room.
Hmm?
[mysterious music playing]
You heard me. I said, go to your roo...
[scoffs] Cute. Little trick candle?
Little magnesium on the wick?
I got something for you. Hmm?
How about that? Hmm?
What about that? [Wincing]
[blowing] Okay.
How do you like those apples?
You and your little tricks.
Thinking you all grown.
- [squeaks]
- Dad, it was still lit!
- Relax. Saliva neutralized... What the
- [banging]
[banging]
[banging]
Oh shit!
Hey, watch your mouth!
- [bat screeching]
- [screaming] Ah, shit! Shit!
[grunts]
Ah!
[grunts]
Oh!
[pan clangs]
[grunts]
[whispering] Come here! Come.
I can't believe
you brought a bat into our home!
Dad! Do you really think
I went into some cave,
found a live bat, and brought it home?
Not all bats live in caves.
Actually, some species,
they live under bridges or in trees.
You know, it's funny,
the western red bat...
Dad, the bat isn't real!
- [bat screeches]
- Whoa!
It sure looked real to me! [Grunts]
[glass shattering]
[whistling]
[mimicking bat]
[warbling]
[mimicking bat]
[whispering] Where is it?
I don't know.
[screams] Dad!
- [bat screeches]
- [screams]
[both screaming]
[bat screeching]
[glass shattering]
[screeching continues]
[boy] Look how much candy I got.
[Howard groaning]
If you're trying to annoy me,
it worked.
Oh, it worked.
[Howard grunting]
[cat meows]
[sinister music playing]
[witches laughing]
- [horn honking]
- [cat meows]
[snarls, purrs]
Uh, Dad, I think
something really weird is going on.
[witch laughing]
[witches laughing]
[witches cackling]
- And I'm gonna find out what it is.
- Oh, no, you're not.
You're grounded, remember?
Wait, who who are you calling?
[scoffs]
You can call God for all I care, so
I said what I said.
- Hey, Syd, what's up?
- Mom, there's some spooky sh
"Stuff" happening tonight.
I know it sounds weird,
but the Halloween decorations
are coming to life.
I want to find out what's going on,
but Dad won't let me.
Gimme the phone.
- Emily, listen, your daughter is trippin'.
- [Emily] No. Think about your daughter.
She wanted to stay in Brooklyn.
And you said no.
- I know, but you...
- She wanted to decorate the house.
And you said no.
She wanted to take ballet.
- Baby, you said no.
- But but that's for her safety.
We are not saying no to this.
It's Halloween. Let her have some fun.
Put me on speaker.
[groaning]
[Emily] The court rules in favor
Of Sydney.
- Yes!
- Damn.
The system works.
Okay.
You can go, but I'm going with you.
- What?
- Look.
Halloween brings out all the crazies,
even in a safe town like this.
No. Mm-mm. Tomorrow, you get space.
Tonight, you get me.
[Emily] Court agrees!
Yeah!
[Emily] Have fun, you guys.
Come by the Stingy Jack Festival.
I have treats waiting.
[groans]
[phone line beeps]
[zombie voice] Brains
Don't worry, kids.
These, uh, zombies won't bite.
Or will they?
I'm just busting your beans.
Get in there. Get the good stuff.
[kids scream]
[laughing] Booyah!
That worked too good. That was too good.
You should've seen your faces.
You look ridiculous.
You got nailed. You got smoked.
I'm just kidding. You guys recovered.
That was a good recovery. I like that.
Come on, grab some stuff here.
There you go. That's for you.
Little something for you.
A couple for you. There you go.
Enjoy it.
You're welcome.
Be careful out there. A lot of freaks.
[grunts]
Back to bed, Mrs. Sullivan. [Laughing]
Eh.
Come on.
What the
Where'd you come from?
[cat purring]
Hey, get out of here. Beat it. Will ya?
- [cat hissing]
- Feisty little one, huh?
[hissing]
[snarls angrily]
[chuckles] Didn't see that coming,
did you?
All right, let's go. Get out of here.
- [skeleton snarling]
- [Sully grunts]
[screams]
[grunts, screams]
See, Dad? I told you.
The bat's eyes were glowing red,
just like this pumpkin.
Just like the witches
from across the street.
Right.
Witches coming to life.
[exhales]
Okay. So what's your plan?
Drive around town, looking for
Halloween decorations with red eyes?
Someone has to do something,
and it might as well be...
[Sully screaming]
[Howard] Wait, Syd. Where are you going?
[screaming, struggling]
[grunting] Get off me!
[zombies growling]
[zombie] Brains
Brains
What the
- [zombies] Brains
- Whoa!
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. [Laughing]
Oh, come on now. Oh, here we go.
Now those are
some impressive animatronics.
Way more impressive
than a stupid werewolf in the shed.
Eat lead, bastard!
[Sully laughing] Oh yeah.
Oh! That worked. Okay.
Come on. Well
Oh no!
[screams, grunts]
[struggling]
[zombie] Brains
[screaming]
Now, that's a bit much.
Dad, we have to do something.
It... Relax, Syd. Okay?
He's just putting on a show
for the trick-or-treaters.
- [screaming]
- Although, that is disturbingly realistic.
- I'll do it myself.
- Wait. Syd, wait.
What? Hey, what are you gonna do?
[grunting]
[Sully screaming]
- That that's not nice, Sydney.
- [Sully] Oh, yeah!
That was awesome! Oh! Good job.
[grunts]
[zombie] Brains
Okay, that...
All right. That's enough play, guys.
[zombie grunts]
[Sully grunts]
[zombie] Brains
- Booyah!
- Holy cow!
Syd, are you okay?
What happened here?
Did all these things short-circuit?
I'll tell you what happened here.
One of these zombies just bit me! Huh?
Oh God. Does that mean
I'm gonna turn into one of them?
Is that how this works?
You can't let me turn.
You gotta shoot me. Blow my head off, man.
What? No, I'm not gonna shoot you!
- I don't wanna turn into a zombie!
- You're not gonna turn into a zombie!
- Zombies are fictional creations. Okay?
- [scoffs]
Dead bodies don't have
functioning nervous systems,
which means they can't move.
Basic biology.
I didn't understand
a single word you just said.
Maybe I should handcuff myself
to the porch just in case.
Or you can get a tetanus shot.
Yeah. Good call, Bill Nye the Science Guy.
- [laughing] Burn.
- [snickers]
You smoked.
Dad, the zombies' eyes were glowing red
just like the bat
and like the flame in Hawthorne's pumpkin.
This all has something to do with her.
I know it does.
- [Sully grunting]
- I'm gonna try to contact her.
Oh, come on, not the Ouija board app.
Give me a break.
Maybe there's another option
we can explore.
Okay. What do you suggest? I'm all ears.
How do you propose
we talk to Hawthorne? She's dead.
[Sully] No, she's not.
No.
- [Howard sighs]
- You're talking about old Madam Hawthorne?
[chuckles] Yeah. Oh yeah.
She's as dead as one
of these brain-eating bastards.
But her granddaughter Victoria
[growls, laughs]
she's still sucking air.
No
[Howard groans]
Even the retirement home is decorated?
- [car door closes]
- Who wants to trick-or-treat here?
Stay alert. An attack could come
from anywhere at any time.
Yeah. We're in real danger here.
- ["The Vampire" by Archie King playing]
- He's a vampire
A bumpkin?
No. A pumpkin. With a "P."
It belonged to your grandmother,
Josephine Hawthorne.
That wasn't no pumpkin. It was a turnip.
No, actually,
I'm pretty sure it was a pumpkin.
I know a soddin' turnip
when I see one, Chachi.
- Chachi?
- Miss Hawthorne.
Can you tell us about the turnip?
Ah It It was a long time ago.
[Howard sighs]
I got this, Syd.
Look.
I don't wanna be here
any longer than I have to be, so
[gasps]
[Howard] Oh!
Take it easy.
You can have this
after you tell my daughter
everything she wants to know.
- [grunts]
- [Howard] Okay?
[woman in background] How y'all doing?
You need any juice?
It was a dark and stormy night.
Of course it was.
-Why is it never humid and sunny-
-Oh my God
Okay, go.
Mystics from all over the world
showed up to our house
at the behest of my Grandma Jo.
[thunder crackling]
[man] Madam Hawthorne.
Hurry, we don't have much time.
It's almost midnight.
[clock ticking]
[Victoria] Their plan
was to use her grimoire,
a book of ancient spells.
All right. Let's get to bewitching.
[group chanting]
[Victoria] They held a sance
to conjure the spirit himself
and finally put an end
to the curse of Stingy Jack.
Wait. Stingy Jack. He's real?
[laughs] He's real, all right.
I seen him with my own two eyes.
With those two eyes? [Scoffs]
- [whispering] Stop.
- Okay, I'm sorry. Continue.
[Victoria] That old lantern
was a gift from the devil himself.
- [laughing]
- [group gasps]
[Victoria] 'Twas what allowed Jack to move
between this world and the spirit world
so that every Halloween,
he could torment
the folks of Bridge Hollow.
But the deal was he could only stay here
from sundown till midnight.
Midnight, Eastern Standard Time?
- Dad.
- What?
But Jack wasn't satisfied
with just one night a year.
He wanted every night to be Halloween.
[laughing maniacally]
Turns out there was a loophole.
Jack could stay in our world forever,
free to spread his mayhem
if, at the stroke of midnight,
he found another soul
to take his place in the ever after.
[dramatic music playing]
[screaming, struggling]
[Victoria] But on Halloween night, 1927,
my Grandma Jo put an end
to the old bastard's plan.
[shouting magic spell]
[Stingy Jack roaring]
Using magic
to trap the ghost of Stingy Jack
inside his own lantern.
So long, Jack.
[blows]
As long as that old lantern remains unlit,
you kids got
nothing at all to worry about.
Ew!
What if we kind of sort of relit it?
Oh, then you're screwed.
- [Emily] Hey, Tammy, how are you?
- Not great.
Been getting lots of reports
of decorations
going missing from people's lawns.
Those Oaktown hoodlums
sure love pulling pranks.
- So, what do we have here?
- Oh, well, help yourself.
Everything you see here
is gluten-free, soy-free, and vegan.
Oh. Just what people want on Halloween.
Healthy snacks.
Here. Try this.
It is a red velvet muffin
made with beetroot
instead of artificial dyes.
Hmm.
Wow.
You can really taste the beetroot.
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
You got your beet. You got your root.
All mixed in there.
- Yes.
- Hey, have you seen our Stingy Jack?
No
[gagging]
[swallowing]
So the winner
of the pumpkin carving contest
- Mm-hmm.
- gets placed on top as the head.
[coughs, spits]
[Emily gasps]
I'm gonna go get
something to wash it down.
Whoo. Gets gets you in a choke hold.
So, what do you think?
I think Crypt Keeper fairy girl
is one bird short of a cuckoo clock.
And that old lantern is clearly a pumpkin.
Dad. Seriously?
What if Victoria's telling the truth?
What if it wasn't Madam Hawthorne
I was talking to on that Ouija board?
What if it was Stingy Jack who tricked me
into finding his old lantern.
Then, when I relit it,
I woke him up or let him out,
and now he's making all
the Halloween decorations come to life.
Oh, come on, Syd.
Halloween decorations coming to life?
That's just not something that happens.
[woman screaming]
[snarling]
Now that is a great costume.
[mysterious music playing]
[snarling]
[all gasp]
Kind of poor taste
for a nursing home though.
[growls]
Nope, not today.
[growling]
Oh, wow.
That looks just like
an Australian funnel-web spider.
Atrax robust us. [Clicks tongue]
Um
Is that bad?
Well, it would be. If it was real.
[chuckles] Good thing these
are just plastic.
Boop! [Chuckles]
[spider chittering]
[spiders screeching]
They're alive! [Screaming]
- [grim reaper growling]
- [residents screaming]
It's impossible.
[screaming continues]
Oh!
[man screaming]
Stay here.
Okay.
Uh
Aha!
[screaming] Ah!
Hey, Syd! Pop quiz.
What chemicals found
in common household cleaning supplies
can be combined
to create a highly acidic solvent?
Maybe now is not the time
for a science lesson!
You got a good point there.
[grunting, roaring]
[chuckles]
I had it set to "mist."
It would've been
so much cooler if it was "spray."
[grunting, roaring]
[spider squeals]
[grunting, roaring]
[roaring]
[spiders squealing]
[roaring]
Syd!
Oh!
[grunting]
[man] Get out! Get out!
[woman] Go! Go! Go! Go!
[woman 2] Oh my God! Please help me.
[grim reaper snarls]
[man 2] Hey, Death. He's older than me.
[Syd] The hydrogen peroxide
combines with the acetic acid in bleach
to make peracetic acid.
Super corrosive.
[door opens]
[tense music playing]
Oh no.
Wasn't there a giant spider on the roof
when we walked in?
[both screaming]
[spider snarling]
Syd!
[grunts]
Come on. Come on!
[spider hissing]
Oh sh...
[screaming]
[grunting]
[screaming]
- [spider hissing]
- [Howard screaming]
[hissing and screaming continue]
Whoa!
[screaming continues]
[Howard grunts]
Okay. Easy, spider. Okay, listen.
I I know you're pissed.
I hated the ending of Charlotte's Web too.
They did Charlotte dirty.
It should've been the pig.
[Howard grunts]
[wincing]
[struggling]
[screams]
[muffled scream]
[struggling]
Hey. Itsy-Bitsy.
[spider squealing]
- We've got to get out of here.
- [muffled] Okay.
Okay.
There's definitely something
unusual going on in Bridge Hollow.
Oh, you think?
[panting] But there has to be
a logical, scientific explanation.
Did you not just see
what happened in there?
[exhales deeply]
No, I I saw it.
And clearly,
there's something crazy going on.
But just because it's crazy
doesn't mean it can't be explained.
What are you talking about?
[mysterious music playing]
Dad, what is it?
It was Halloween 1985.
My friends and I,
we were out trick-or-treating
when they dared me to go
into this abandoned building
to prove I wasn't chicken.
But I made a wrong step.
I fell through the floorboards
into the basement.
And that's when I saw them.
Skeletons.
Hundreds.
They were everywhere.
And they were alive.
If that happened to you then,
why don't you think it's happening now?
Because it didn't happen to me.
A month later, I'm in science class.
My teacher tells us that a concussion
can cause temporary hallucinations.
And that was the answer.
From that day on,
I knew everything had an explanation.
- It was science. Not magic.
- So
It's "eureka!" Not "abracadabra."
Then explain to me
how Granddaddy Long Legs came alive
and tried to eat us.
Well,
maybe it was a gas leak
causing mass hallucinations.
Or maybe it's Stingy Jack.
Well, whatever it is
it's spreading like a virus.
Which makes sense.
Because it did start with a bat.
Okay, hear me out. Let's just say
hypothetically, this is Jack.
Victoria said her grandmother
trapped Jack inside that old lantern.
Maybe we could do the same thing.
- Re-trap him.
- Okay, let's say you're right.
Hypothetically, how do we go about
doing something completely fictional
and not at all real,
like trapping a ghost?
I don't know.
But I know some kids who might.
["Somebody's Watching Me"
by Rockwell playing]
I'm just an average man
With an average life
I work from 9 to 5
Hey, hell, I pay the price
All right, Syd. Stay close.
Syd. Syd. Sydney.
That's not close!
Hey, guys.
Thanks again for helping me tonight.
- Where are we?
- [Ramona] Here's what we know.
If you wanna trap a ghost,
you're gonna need a spell.
Preferably an old-world
Romani binding spell.
- Know any Gypsy witches?
- Not any that are still alive.
Uh Is that your dad?
[Howard] Sydney!
Ah.
Yeah.
Dad, guys. Guys, Dad.
Hi. What's up, players?
Dap it up. Sideways. No?
No love? Okay.
[chuckles] I like the costumes.
Nice. Let me guess.
Uh [inhales deeply] Power Rangers.
Madonna.
Uh Puerto Rican Prince.
You are so old.
[gasps]
So anything else?
Yeah. I, uh, found this article online
that says when Madam Hawthorne died,
they auctioned off some of her stuff.
One of the items listed is
her old grimoire. Spell book.
I know.
That's it! Dad, we need that book.
Okay, Rico Suave,
does the article say who bought it?
Yeah. This fancy-pants antiques dealer.
Sheldon Skinner.
Oh, wait, guys. Skinner's here.
Uh, he's wearing a Harvard sweatshirt
and some of those go-to-hell pants.
He bought tickets for the Kreepy Karnevil
in the pumpkin patch.
Then we have to split up.
Okay. Take these.
What are go-to-hell pants?
And am I wearing them?
[evil laughing]
Did you really mean what you said earlier
about quitting the science team?
Dad, I don't know.
It was really fun when I was younger,
and it was obvious
you really wanted me to do it.
Just like you really wanted me
to do karate.
Step right up, ladies and ghouls,
to a freak-tacular sideshow
of thrills and chills,
here in the Kreepy Karnevil.
That's not how you spell
either of those words.
[mysterious music playing]
[bat screeching]
Dad.
Look.
That means Jack is here.
[bat screeching]
- [snarling]
- [grunting]
[grunting]
- What's wrong with you?
- [gasps]
Why would you do that?
I am so sorry.
We thought you were someone else.
Oh my God
Oh, baby. I know. Okay. [Speaks gibberish]
[screams]
- [laughing]
- [clown nose honking]
Yeah, you never really liked clowns.
Especially ones with axes.
[evil laughing]
[axe scraping]
Yeah.
[growling]
[screaming]
[Howard] Wait, Syd!
They're just actors.
[evil laugh]
[Howard] Hey.
[growls]
I don't think you're allowed
to touch me unless I sign a waiver.
[growls]
[Howard] Hey. Okay.
Let's calm down now.
Just knocked
your little infant friend out.
- [growls]
- [axe clanking]
- [grunting, laughing]
- [nose honking]
- [groans]
- [clown laughs evilly]
These aren't actors?
[growls]
[grunts]
[clown laughs evilly]
[grunts]
Sydney, they aren't actors!
- Repeat! The clowns are not actors!
- [clown continues laughing]
[Ramona] So you no longer have the book.
No, I sold it a while ago.
I'd assumed Hawthorne's effects
were of some value,
but apparently,
the only people who care about that junk
are nutjobs and occultists.
[gasps] No offense.
When you say occultists,
you mean like Satanists?
Not like.
Precisely.
Do you remember
the name of the person you sold it to?
No, I don't remember his name,
but he had a shipping address
I will never forget.
666 Elm Street.
[snorts] Like I said, nutjobs.
[scoffs]
[Ramona] Let's go
to the ticket booth first.
- If she's not there...
- Killer clowns! Killer clowns!
- Uh, Sydney, what's going on?
- Stingy Jack! He's here!
- What?
- Where?
Everywhere!
- [kids screaming]
- [growling]
[Howard] Syd! No!
It's called the Halls of Horror.
Why couldn't you just go
to the pumpkin patch?
[suspenseful music playing]
[all panting]
- [snorting]
- [all screaming]
[suspenseful music continues]
It's a dead end.
- [growls]
- [all screaming]
- [screams]
- Guys! Over here!
[screams]
Okay. Which way?
Eeny, meeny, miney
[Syd] Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
[evil laughing]
Sydney!
[Syd] Dad?
Sydney!
[screaming]
[evil laughing]
[Syd] Dad!
[Howard] Sydney!
Dad?
Dad?
- [screams]
- Hey! Hey. It's me. It's me.
Dad!
- It's okay, kiddo.
- Look, there's an exit sign.
We're almost out.
[suspenseful music playing]
[axe scraping]
All right. Back up. Back up.
Okay, Bozo. I'm gonna wipe
that crooked smile right off your face.
Come on. Come on.
Let you know, Homey don't play that.
[Howard grunts]
[clown laughs evilly, grunts]
Oh!
Dad!
[all gasp]
- [Howard] Get him.
- [gasp]
Ow!
[gasps]
[grunting]
[all gasp]
[all groan]
[Howard laughing]
Oh, night night!
Oh, oh! Nice!
You know, I softened him up for you,
but, uh, way to finish the job.
Sure, you did.
[nervously] Um, guys?
- [growling]
- Hey.
Why does a clown need an axe anyway?
Go!
To the right! That way!
We parked out front.
[tense music playing]
[laughing evilly]
- Okay, now what?
- Um, plan B. Bikes!
Well, that would be great
if my dad knew how to ride a bike.
You don't know how to ride a bike?
I was taught books could take me
wherever I needed to go.
- [groaning]
- [clown snarling]
Okay, bikes it is. Go! Go! Go!
[bike bell dings]
This thing is growing exponentially.
Each creature spreads it to another,
which spreads it to another and another.
At its current rate, it'll take over
Bridge Hollow by midnight.
And according to Victoria,
if we can't stop Jack by then,
he could find a soul to swap for his own.
Then every day will be Halloween.
- Maybe we should call the police.
- Dad.
Do you really think
the cops are going to believe any of this?
- You didn't even believe it.
- Because it doesn't make sense.
Not everything has to, Dad.
[cheering in the distance]
And now the moment
you've all been waiting for.
Who will be the face
of this year's Stingy Jack?
[exhales deeply]
And the winner is
Dan Brown!
[crowd cheers]
Oh my God! Oh my God!
In your face, Gary! In your face!
I did it, Ma! I did it!
We gotta! We gotta!
- Tammy
- No, no, no, no.
Now let's get this guy up
on old Stingy Jack.
[crowd continues cheering]
Discos don't open till after dark
And it ain't till twelve
Till the party really starts
And I always had to be home by ten
Right before the fun
Was about to begin
Crowds of people
Lined up inside and out
Just one reason, to rock the house
But in the daytime
The streets were clear
You couldn't find
A good freak anywhere, 'cause
The freaks come out at night
The freaks come out at night
- Okay, this is it.
- No! No, no, no, no, no, no!
[screaming, grunting]
[grunting]
[muffled] Okay.
[spitting]
I'm gonna assume that wasn't intentional.
[gasps]
Bones.
Why does it have to be bones?
Um You know, maybe
maybe I'll just stay right here.
What? No, come on.
[groaning]
[panting]
[groans]
[grunts, pants]
Whoa!
[strains]
[groans]
[gasping]
[sighs]
Okay.
Are we sure about this?
I've never met
a real devil worshiper before.
Should we be wearing
crucifixes or something?
Only one way to find out.
[doorbell rings]
[all] Principal Floyd?
Well, hey there, everyone.
And, Howard, what a pleasant surprise.
You all trick-or-treating tonight?
Well, you're in luck
because this year, I've got
Miniature toothpastes.
["I Put a Spell on You"
by Screamin' Jay Hawkins playing]
I put a spell on you
- So, uh, Floyd.
- Uh-huh.
What are you some type
of Satanist or something?
- Oh jeepers. No, Howard.
- [gasps] What the hell?
I'm a principal in a very small town
with a very big Christian population.
No, no, no. I just, uh, collect things.
You know, some people collect stamps.
Some people collect butterflies.
I collect objects
related to the eternal damnation
of the human soul.
Aha!
I believe this
is what you're looking for.
Okay, here it is.
"Captus Exspiravit."
"Cum his verbis O spirit us."
Dad. You know Latin. What does it say?
[clears throat]
With these words, O spirit,
I banish you to captivity
binding you to blah, blah, blah, blah
Right on. So how does it work?
Well, it's your typical,
run-of-the-mill binding spell.
You find a nice receptacle, right?
Then you get close enough to your target.
Be careful.
Then you say these magic words, and boom.
- You've trapped yourself a ghost.
- How close do we need to get?
I don't know. I mean, look,
there's no hard-and-fast rules
with these things.
I do know this.
When you say this spell,
you have to believe it.
- [both] Mm-hmm.
- I mean, truly believe it.
In your bones.
[loud banging]
[banging]
[banging]
Please tell me you ordered pizza.
[suspenseful music playing]
Oh, you must not tip well.
[gasps]
[skeletons groaning]
[skeletons growling]
[tense music playing]
[screaming]
- [Floyd] Let's go, move it.
- [all whimpering]
[grunts]
[growling]
[grunts]
- You just had to put helmets on them?
- I thought it would be cute.
[Floyd grunts]
[grunting]
[skeletons hissing, growling]
[grunts]
[straining]
[Mario] Sydney! Save the grimoire!
- [Mario grunting]
- [skeleton groaning]
[grunting]
[Ramona panting]
[Jamie] Get the book out of here.
[Syd grunts]
[Syd grunts]
Syd!
I got it!
[dramatic music playing]
The spell!
- We gotta get out of here.
- [Floyd] We can get out the back.
No! Dad, we have to get that spell.
It's the only way we can fix this.
We can't fix anything if we're dead.
Now, come on and bring your little ass.
[Syd panting]
- [Howard] Let's go! Let's go! Come on!
- Hurry!
[all screaming]
Go! Get in the basement!
Go! Go! Go!
[grunting] Get in the basement!
- Go!
- [Howard] Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
[Floyd screaming]
[Syd panting]
[straining]
[Jamie] Mario, help him!
[gasping]
[grunting]
Dad. Do something!
[Floyd groaning]
Dad! What is wrong with you?
[groaning]
The skeletons.
- They're coming through.
- What do we do?
[Syd] So it's unexplainable.
So what? They're real.
You know what you can do
to something that's real?
You can kick its ass.
[chuckles]
You can take the girl out of Brooklyn,
but you can't take Brooklyn
out the girl.
[skeletons screeching]
[Howard] Hey, Syd! Pop quiz.
You know what the chainsaw
was originally called?
[door cracking]
A bone cutter.
["Highway to Hell" by AC/DC playing]
[chainsaw engine starts]
Yeah.
This will do just fine.
Livin' easy
[screaming]
Season ticket on a one-way ride
[screams]
Hey, mama, look at me
I'm on the way to the promised land
[screaming]
Highway to hell
- [grunting]
- [screaming]
I'm on the highway to hell
[screaming, grunting]
[engine whirring intensifies]
[engine sputters]
Whoa!
[grunts, screams]
Hmm? What the hell?
[shrieking]
Ahhh!
[shrieking]
Whoo!
Whoo, whoo, whoo. Whoo!
[grunting]
Ah!
[shrieking]
[Howard] Ahhh!
[cracking]
- Ahhh!
- [cracking]
[Howard sighs]
[music ends]
Holy Lucifer, Howard.
[panting]
Sydney, I take back
everything I said about your dad.
That was the coolest thing
I've ever seen in my whole life.
[sentimental music playing]
Boy, I hope somebody
remembers these words.
[dramatic music playing]
[evil laughing]
What was that?
[Jamie] The Halloween decorations.
They're gone.
[Floyd] But where did they go?
The Stingy Jack Festival.
He's building an army.
[both] Mom.
These right here, Father,
are egg-free coconut-pineapple scones.
- Ah, that's a home run, huh?
- Yes!
[crunching]
[grunts]
So.
I'm really not supposed to lie.
[Tammy] Yeah! Love it!
Mm-mm.
Oh, there's our pumpkin. Come on!
[crowd cheering, whistling]
Well guess it's time
to call it a night. [Chuckles]
[Tammy] Let's hear it for Stingy Jack!
[crowd cheering]
[all chanting] Stingy Jack.
Stingy Jack. Stingy Jack.
[suspenseful music playing]
[Howard] Which way do we go?
It's still a few more blocks that way.
Or we can take the shortcut.
Through the cemetery.
Okay. Let's go.
Oh, please tell me
they don't decorate the cemeteries here.
[suspenseful music continues]
Hey, Syd. What are you doing?
- Come on, we have to find your mom.
- And then what, Dad?
Stingy Jack has completely taken over
Bridge Hollow.
And without Madam Hawthorne's spell,
we can't stop him.
We need that spell.
What are you thinking?
I don't know, guys.
I led the weekend sance
at the community center a few times,
but that was years ago.
Please, you have to try.
Okay. Um, everybody, take hands.
Oh! I can't believe I'm doing this.
But I am so here for it.
You know, channeling the energy.
- Whatever.
- Thank you.
[clears throat]
Close your eyes.
Uh, now again,
I'm very much out of practice...
[speaking Latin]
[Floyd] Everyone.
[all speaking Latin]
[gasps]
[all gasp]
[Jaime] Whoa.
Miss Hawthorne?
Miss Josephine Hawthorne.
Are you in here?
Can you hear me?
[Josephine] Of course I hear you, child.
[in Josephine's voice] I'm not deaf.
I'm dead.
Hell's bells, what have I done?
This is so going on TikTok.
Um, I released Stingy Jack.
[in Josephine's voice] You did what?
It is my honor as mayor of Bridge Hollow
to light this year's Stingy Jack.
Yeah. Light it up!
[crowd cheering]
[electrical crackling]
[crowd gasps]
[man] What on earth?
- [man 2] Not good.
- [woman] What's going on?
All right, everyone.
Must have just blown a fuse or something.
- [woman 2] Is somebody trippin'?
- [woman 3] That is weird.
What the H-E-C-K is that?
[dramatic music playing]
[screeching]
Is this part of the show?
Beats me, Father.
[squawking]
[crowd gasping]
[witch laughing]
[in Josephine's voice] I can't believe
you nitwits
brought that dusty old demon back to life.
What are you going to do next?
Bring back the black plague?
I don't know.
You realize
he's going to try to do it again?
To find a soul to take back
and trade with the devil
so he can take over the world?
But this time,
he won't let anyone stop him.
We can stop him.
[in Josephine's voice] Oh!
And how do you propose to do this?
You gonna hit him
with your little broomstick?
- Cast a little spell?
- Exactly.
[scoffs]
[Syd] The binding spell from your book.
If you tell us the words,
we can use it to re-trap Jack
and put him away forever.
[sighs]
[in Josephine's voice] As you wish.
Cum his verbis O spirit us
te ad captivitatem eccio.
Captivitatem.
Adligans te ad flammam diabalit.
[Ramona] Got it.
Mm-hmm.
[Josephine's voice] Good for you.
Now can I please go back to being dead?
Oh, uh, yes, I'm sorry.
[clears throat, speaking Latin]
Uh [speaks Latin hesitantly]
[Josephine's voice] Oh, for the love of...
Where did you learn this?
From a Cracker Jack box?
Amateurs.
[snaps fingers]
- [in normal voice] What just happened?
- Huh?
[sniffs]
Why do I smell like an old white lady?
I know what's going on here.
It's those degenerates from Oaktown
trying to sabotage our festival again.
Well, not this year.
Nuh-uh.
- [growls]
- [Tammy] You can't hide behind that mask.
I could smell
an Oaktownie from a mile away.
You know why?
Because you reek of sour grapes.
- [man] It's a bunch of Oaktownies.
- [Tammy] We don't want you here.
We don't want any of you weird freaks.
[evil laughing]
[grunts]
- [crowd gasps]
- [evil laughing]
You shouldn't have done that, clown boy.
[growling]
- [Syd gasps] They're everywhere.
- [Mario] I'm starting to hate Halloween.
[Ramona] We got this.
Oh, Syd. Look. Over there.
Mom's booth. Come on.
[whispering] Quiet. Quiet.
[bat fluttering, squealing]
[bat squealing]
[ethereal crackling]
[flame explodes]
[crowd gasping]
Oh, dear Lord.
Where is she? Where's Mom?
I don't know!
And where's all the muffins
and cookies and stuff?
Maybe she sold them all
and then went home.
[scoffs]
Okay, Syd. Pop quiz.
Where is
the big pumpkin-headed statue thing
that was there just a minute ago?
He's gone.
What time is it?
It's almost midnight.
Dad, we need to find Jack
before he takes someone's soul
back to the spirit world,
or else we're screwed.
No, he can't.
If he wants to trade a soul
with the devil,
he needs the lantern.
And the lantern is back at the
[ominous music playing]
[cork twisting]
["Back to That" by Jared Lee
playing in the background]
[clattering in distance]
Hello?
[distant bang]
[mysterious music playing]
[laughing] I'm trippin'. I'm trippin'.
[chuckling]
So no one wants my baked goods.
Well, more for me.
Mmm.
[suspenseful music playing]
[whispering] Dad.
- What?
- What are you doing?
[panting] I'm looking for wheels.
A car, a truck, something.
Anything.
[groans]
[mumbles] I don't know.
Check for keys. Check.
- [panting] Okay. Come on
- Nothing.
[scoffs] Hey. Never do this.
[grunts]
Bypassing the ignition
allows the positively charged battery
to push the negatively charged electrons
to the starter and
[engine starts]
- [whispers] Eureka.
Mm-hmm.
Don't tell Mom about this.
[chuckles]
All right.
Let's go.
[engine accelerates]
[brakes screeching]
What are they doing?
Why are they just standing there?
The last time Jack tried to steal a soul,
Madam Hawthorne stopped him.
So this time, he's using his army
to make sure no one gets in his way.
He'll keep us here till midnight
then attack.
Yeah. Well, lucky for us,
we're driving this Cucurbita pepo.
- Or, in layman's terms
- A squash.
Hang on.
- [engine accelerates]
- [tires screeching]
[suspenseful music continues]
[both shout]
[Howard screams]
Oh, here comes Charlotte!
[both screaming]
[tires screeching]
Oh!
[crowd gasps]
Well, there goes
this year's safest small town in the US.
Yes!
Whoo!
[bat screeching]
["What It Beats For" by Jared Lee
playing in the background]
[crunching]
That is really hard.
- Ugh.
- [clanking on plate]
[suspenseful music building]
[growling]
[screaming]
[grunts]
[screaming]
[growling]
[growls]
- [growls]
- [screams]
[panting]
Brains. Brains.
- Brains. Brains.
- [tires screeching]
Cum his verbis O spirit us
Cum his verbis O spirit us.
I tried to get you to learn Latin.
Remember?
Dad, Latin is literally a dead language,
and at that time, it seemed useless.
Well, it's not so useless now, is it?
[tense music playing]
[breathing shakily]
[heavy footsteps approaching]
[growls]
[tires screeching]
- You ready? Okay.
- Ready.
- [Sully] Hi, neighbor!
- Oh!
[laughing] Wondering what I'm doing
in your bushes, right?
I'm not hiding if that's what you think.
- Yeah, you are.
- I'm not scared of anything.
- You know what I mean? All right.
- That's nice.
Hey, turns out you were right.
I didn't turn into a zombie, huh?
- Lucky you.
- [laughs] Halloween, baby.
[door closes]
[suspenseful music playing]
- Oh!
- Oh! Oh
It's your husband!
- Honey?
- What was in that muffin? Cement?
I get it. I get it. Baking isn't
[growls] Look out!
[gasping]
Mom!
[Emily screaming, struggling]
[gasping]
[grunts]
He breathes fire now?
[evil laughing]
[Syd] Come on.
- [bat squealing]
- Oh! Syd! Back up! Back up! Back up!
Okay. All right.
You distract the bat. I'll save Mom.
But, Dad, I have to do the spell.
Listen. It is too dangerous in there.
Now, I am still your father,
and sometimes I still need to protect you.
Okay?
[eerie music playing]
- [bat screeching]
- [Howard screaming]
- Go! Save Mom! I got this.
- Okay.
[tense music playing]
- [bat screeching]
- [witches laughing]
All right, Oaktownies! Come get some!
[snarling, laughing]
I don't think
you should be encouraging them, dear.
[Tammy] Don't get some! Don't get some!
I changed my mind.
[priest] Stay back!
I'm thinking these things
ain't from Oaktown.
[bat screeching]
[Emily screaming]
[Syd] Dad! Hurry!
We're running out of time!
[bat screeching]
[grunts]
[wincing] Ow.
All right, rat-face.
Round two. Ding ding.
- [bat screeching]
- [Emily screaming]
[Stingy Jack laughing evilly]
[Emily] Oh no! No!
Let me go!
Let me go!
Let me go!
[screaming]
[gasps]
I got you.
Cum his verbis O spirit us
te ad captivitatem eccio.
Adligans te ad flammam diabalit.
[both screaming]
[Stingy Jack laughing evilly]
Cum his verbis O spirit us
te ad captivitatem eccio.
Adligans te ad flammam diabalit.
- [Stingy Jack growls]
- [Howard grunts]
- Howard!
- I'm trying.
Dad, hurry!
At midnight his army is going to attack!
I've said the spell!
Twice! It's not working!
You have to truly believe!
[clock ticking loudly]
Dad! You can do it! I know you can!
[bat screeching]
[grunts]
Now cast that frigging spell!
[grunting]
With these words, O spirit,
I banish you to captivity
[growls]
binding you to the devil's flame!
- [Howard grunting]
- [Emily gasping]
[growling]
[Emily gasping]
[ethereal crackling]
- [thudding]
- [both gasping]
Abracadabra.
[clock ticks loudly]
[bell tolling]
[crowd gasping]
[crowd groaning]
[crowd gasps]
[electrical whirring]
- They did it!
- They trapped him!
Oh, thank God.
I thought they were screwed for sure.
[all laughing]
[Floyd grunting]
You see that?
I'm on a new team, baby!
- [crowd cheers]
- Welcome, son.
Thank you. [Laughing]
Well-done, Oaktown. Well-done.
We'll see you next year.
[man] See you next year.
[crowd cheering]
[Emily grunts]
[crackling]
[both screaming]
[groaning, spitting]
Oh!
[spitting]
[laughing]
- That's funny?
- Yes.
[tense music playing]
So long, Jack.
[tense music ends]
[Mario] Wow, Mr. Gordon.
I mean, I just wish I could've been there
to see you whip Stingy Jack's ass.
Sorry, I meant "butt."
Nah, that's okay. I did whoop his ass.
- [laughing]
- [clears throat]
I meant, we whooped his ass.
It was a team effort.
All right, who wants some cinnamon rolls?
Whoo!
- [Ramona and Jamie] Thank you!
- Good luck.
[Syd laughing]
[Ramona] Wow!
These are amazing.
- [Mario] Incredible.
- [Syd and Howard] They are?
You should open a shop, Mrs. Gordon.
Wait a second.
Hmm.
Yo, what'd you put in this?
Butter, sugar, gluten.
[Howard and Emily laughing]
I figured, after last night,
life's too short.
I'm just happy that Halloween is over.
You thought last night was crazy?
You should see
what this town does for Christmas.
[both] Christmas?
[unenthusiastically] Ho ho ho.
[serene music playing]
I still say we should destroy that thing
and be done with it.
Dad, we went over this.
If we destroy the lantern, we...
We could release Jack again.
I know. I know.
But see, that's why I got this.
Ammonium phosphate.
Flame retardant.
Better be safe than sorry.
Sounds like someone's a believer.
[Howard chuckles] Hey.
Here.
You want me to lock it?
Yeah, and then I want you
to take the key and keep it safe.
You're old enough now.
You're old enough to do a lot of things.
And I'mma try my best to remember that.
Thanks, Dad.
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
[laughs]
You wanna join in or what?
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Ja...
[mysterious music playing]
[mysterious music intensifies]
- Oh, hell, no.
- Oh, hell, no.
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
Old woman, old woman
Don't treat me so mean
You're the meanest old woman
That I've ever seen
I guess if you say so
- I'll have to pack my things and go
- That's right
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
Now, baby, listen, baby
Don't ya treat me this way
'Cause I'll be back
On my feet someday
Don't care if you do
'Cause it's understood
You ain't got no money
You just ain't no good
Well, I guess if you say so
- I'll have to pack my things and go
- That's right
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
What you say?
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back
No more, no more, no more, no more
Hit the road, Jack
And don't you come back no more
- Well
- Don't you come back no more
Uh, what you say?
- Don't you come back no more
- I didn't understand you
Don't you come back no more
You can't mean that
- And don't you come back no more
- Oh, now, baby, please
- Don't you come back no more
- What you trying to do to me?
Don't you come back no more
[song fades out]
["The Tale Of Stingy Jack" by Baraka May
and The Pinewood Singers playing]
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
The magic works if you believe
So cast the spell to make him leave
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
To rid the world of Stingy Jack
Just cast the spell and send him back
Cast the spell and send him back
[mysterious music playing]
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
The magic works if you believe
So cast the spell to make him leave
When Stingy Jack escapes the curse
Each Halloween just like the first
To rid the world of Stingy Jack
Just cast the spell and send him back
Cast the spell and send him back
[song ends]
[mysterious music playing]