The Fabulous Patars (2016) Movie Script
Coco! Here, take this!
Caro...
Ok, guys, here we go!
Who needs a sign?
You're going to OD on that thing.
Are you ok?
Yes.
Want hot chocolate?
I'm ok.
- A cigarette?
- No, I'm fine.
- Denis.
- Caroline.
Want to come with us?
Here, grab a sign. Let's go.
Ok, here we go!
Mister Minister, your bill is sinister!
Stick it where the sun never shines!
THE FABULOUS PATARS
Why are you against the PM's policy?
Could he live with 3,800 francs a month?
His shoes cost that! It's sick!
I believe another world is possible!
I really believe it!
Le Pen, you're fucked so bad,
the youth are hopping mad!
Le Pen, you're fucked so bad
the youth are hopping mad!
Gigi! Janine!
What a fright, sweetheart.
THE PRESENT DAY
Janine, come and see.
What is it?
Ziggy's all stiff.
Shit, not again...
Over here, it's like he's eating.
- I guess.
- Go and wake Denis.
Unicorn Power!
- That hurts!
- It's all flabby!
Heard of sport?
These aren't John Cena's abs!
Anyone can look ripped with Photoshop.
The tune's better...
For pity's sake, not the recorder!
It sounds better in the garden.
Leave me be now.
Love you, girls.
Come on, leave me now.
Off you go.
Go on...
I told you I wouldn't go to this.
Try seeing girls aged over 14.
Love you!
- Your card?
- Not got one.
You're under four?
Sit down.
Thank you!
They're up to four million views.
- Hi, Robert.
- Hi, Wednesday.
Hold on...
Don't tell me you still have head lice?
No way.
Hey! Wait!
We forgot the canteen cheque again.
- Denis!
- He's too much!
He'll burn his Nutella calories.
Go, Denis!
This guy's crazy!
See my dad? He did it!
#Halloween at Happy Garden:
buy one rat, get one free.
I'm disturbing your nap?
Shit, I'm sorry.
The last one.
That's great. That one will work.
They'll understand if you explain.
I can't traumatize them.
Wednesday's so fragile...
Give me a break.
- For Sunday's inventory...
- Yeah?
It'll be paid in days off.
You do too much overtime.
C'mon, Pierrot, you know days off
aren't what I need.
I know. Here...
#Denis Patar,
urgent message at reception.
I'll take over.
How are the mass units coming?
What's a DG?
It's...
No cheating.
- A decigram...
- A decigram!
Keep quiet, I'm questioning her.
Sure that's what a DG is?
So what's 83?
Tons... Three tons is 3,000 kilos.
Sorry. The school called me.
Mr Patar, this is the third time
in a month.
The third?
He's doing what he can.
Not enough, apparently.
I was asked to send an LC
to the prosecutor.
What's an LC?
A Letter of Concern. I had no choice.
- I reported you.
- Reported me?
Isn't that a bit much for half an hour?
Mr Patar,
do I look like a nanny?
No...
- See you, Patrick.
- Ease off the wrestling.
- Don't worry.
- Let's go.
Take your cap.
- Kisses!
- Thanks. Sorry...
Is my tongue blue?
- Bye, Wednesday.
- Bye, Michel.
You're jealous.
I'm not jealous.
You're jealous of my lollipops.
Janine, hurry!
Come on, move it!
Let me fetch her.
Next year maybe.
Try trusting me.
It's the world I don't trust.
Understand?
As usual, girls, don't stay up...
Too late!
I have to go.
- A kiss!
- Here you go.
See you!
Denis, kiss the pets for me.
Of course. Bye.
Go inside to bed.
I'll be a night veterinarian too one day.
Sweet Pussy
Video screening
"When Jessica saw that Jeff
no longer had the Eye of the Moon,
#she plunged her clawed hand
into his chest
And ripped out his heart.
Blood and guts began to pour out.
'You fucking bastard,'
she screamed at Bourbon Kid,
spitting blood.
#Then, as the total eclipse
reached its peak
#and Santa Mondega was plunged
into darkness,
Jeff heard the fatal words:
Fill the glass."
I can see you're not sleeping.
You were practicing again?
You're like New York, alive 24/7.
The fireflies soon die.
I have plenty of larvae.
That big one, with the blank eyes...
He looks like Robert.
Go to sleep now.
Sweet dreams, beauty.
Release me.
Easy application
You're looking good.
No...
There, none the wiser.
"Dear Sir/Madam,
following a Letter of Concern
in relation to your children,
a social worker
will be evaluating your situation
by coming to your place of abode
on November 27th at eight am."
We'll end up in an orphanage
and you in jail?
No...
You don't need to put your hand up
to speak.
This isn't the gulag.
In #The Rescuers#, the girl
escapes from the orphanage
and ends up in the bayou.
Bayous are in the USA.
They won't send you that far.
But they may not put you with Gigi.
It's amazing,
this gift you have for always butting in
at the wrong time.
Get out! Go on!
Listen...
Isn't today the 27th?
The 27th?
Fuck!
Come on!
If you're questioned, be polite.
Christian and straight.
Come on, hurry!
Blond, thin, Swedish.
Denis, the cube!
Stuff to keep, in the bucket!
Throw this out, quick!
It's 7:43!
Get rid of this thing.
Hurry up.
Curtain... Staple-gun...
7:46...
Girls, I'm counting on you.
Janine, take it easy.
Cool.
Zen.
I can do it.
All right... Let's go.
I've no coffee. Chocolate?
No, thanks. Let's get started.
I have other families after.
The prosecutor's office
has had several alerts,
starting with your bank.
Is that really your business?
Mr Patar, I need to understand
the way you live
and the household budget is part of that.
We manage it as best we can.
We've paid tax monthly on our two salaries
for three years now.
And so we try to...
Pay attention to everything.
Yeah, for instance,
on Saturdays,
we picnic on the supermarket aisles.
We save loads of money that way.
Smart, huh?
Yes, smart is the word.
I see that you've refused
family allowance grants
for household help.
Yes, because we don't need anyone.
You need a hand with cleaning.
Sorry, but something smells of vinegar.
That's me.
Wednesday...
You put your hand up to speak.
You know that. I keep telling her.
Why Wednesday?
Caroline called her that
cos David Bowie was born on a Wednesday.
And she's Janine
cos that's one of his songs.
Bowie is part of the family.
I see.
David Bowie, the singer.
Yes, I've heard of him.
What did you want to say, Wednesday?
Go ahead.
Well, since I have head-lice,
Denis puts vinegar on my hair.
It's much cheaper
than pharmacy products,
but it really stings the eyes.
Less than the flea stuff for dogs
we tried.
These lice are really resistant...
It's as if she's raising them.
I see that on top of the mortgage,
there's a large monthly loan payment.
Can you tell me what that is?
That was the funeral.
- It was brilliant.
- Totally! A dream funeral.
I see... But 15,000 euros
is a bit much, isn't it?
They wanted to plan it all.
It had to be cool.
When you die, it's for good.
You bet. It was cheaper to burn Mum,
but we didn't like the idea.
Janine, stop.
Stop doing that.
You know, when people die,
you can't bury them uncovered
or they rot too fast.
I didn't know.
We had a special cardboard coffin made
And decorated it with peonies.
Her favourites.
We rented a bubble machine.
And hired a band too.
That's enough!
No need for the details.
Mr Patar,
I need to see the girls alone.
I'm not leaving them.
It won't take long.
Please.
Denis is totally cool.
He's an ace hacker
for zoo and movie tickets.
We don't need money.
"A candy if you clean your teeth..."
He works nights in a pet store.
"On the black," he says.
It can't be easy in the dark.
Denis and our grandparents
are like gremlins.
Five minutes in the same room,
they devour each other.
I see...
We get presents for tidying up.
Willy-shaped pasta with Nutella?
He lets us sleep if we're tired,
even if we have school.
If we let him sleep on Sundays,
we go to the King of Fries.
When Mum...
I was angry
so he enrolled me for wrestling.
Cool.
What did your mum do?
She wrote demo chants.
She wrote "Mister Minister"
and she was only 14.
How does that one go?
Mister Minister, your bill is sinister!
Your bill, your bill
Mister Minister, your bill is sinister!
Stick it where the sun never shines!
Remove custody?
For the law, you're incompetent.
Why? We're fine.
Who do you mean by "we"?
The nights alone,
the police station,
the funeral arrangements...
Don't you see how stressed Janine is?
Have you seen a therapist?
A therapist?
Isn't that a bit much?
The courts can prosecute
parents who neglect
their parental obligations.
I back up the prosecutor
who recommends
a parental responsibility course.
We'll send you the papers.
Hold on a second.
I do all I can
to keep our heads above water
and you advise a course?
Think I have time for tea and cakes?
I have jobs to do and bills to pay!
I'm here to help your girls.
If you refuse,
the next step is a court hearing
and, given the situation,
they'll end up in a foster home.
For the law, you're incompetent.
#We'll go to an orphanage
and you to jail?
They'll end up in a foster home.
Actually, I'm doing really great.
I even have some good news for you.
I'm listening.
Let me explain.
Actually...
I'm planning to group together
all my comp time
to do professional training
over several weeks.
Not Bowie...
Are you kidding?
- This?
- It's cute.
- Cute?
- Yes, totally!
It's sick.
- Hold on!
- Come to work!
Hands off David.
Or else your smartphone will meet my wall.
And that'll be sick!
- Denis can't come to work.
- Your things.
He's having a heart amputation
at Santa Mondega.
Lots of love!
What're you doing?
Hello?
Pierrot?
I sorted it all out.
Don't thank me.
I love talking to Pierrot.
He's just like John Cena.
He pisses me off.
You piss me off.
Stop that, you.
You all piss me off.
Launched in 2007 as part of the law
against delinquency,
the parental course
helps to remind failing parents
of the obligations in raising a child.
This process will allow you
to improve your educational skills.
The final hearing
is with Child Assistance.
If all goes well, and it should,
we'll close your case.
If not, legal proceedings begin.
Any questions?
Mrs Grellot, I'm shocked.
"Educational skills"?
It sounds like a job interview.
True, the term is a little off-putting.
You talk about a hearing.
But a hearing for what?
How can I put this?
It evaluates your family spirit.
Wouldn't it be wiser to work case by case?
What do we have in common?
Theory is one thing,
but daily life,
managing work and the kids, isn't easy.
- The lady's right!
- I know.
Do you have children yourself?
I bet you don't.
I think you need an outside gaze.
Someone with a global and detached view
of your family.
As we work, I'll give you badges...
For each step made.
There are seven. It's very motivating.
Like a bad driver's course.
If you like.
You could say that.
How'll our kids respect us
with your badges?
- He's right.
- This is ridiculous.
We're not children!
Play along with it!
It sucks.
- It's to optimize...
- Listen.
The course is obligatory
so let's get down to work.
We'll begin by tidying up your lives
thanks to frames.
Badge N1.
Stability.
First, create a cocoon
#in which both parents
can protect the children.
I'm sorry.
Your eyes are as beautiful as each other.
They're a very lovely oyster colour.
Children need bearings.
Put things back in their place,
With tact and firmness.
- You have to.
- It sucks!
I don't want to!
Go on.
Point on the right foot behind...
Move to the side and close.
You're as cute as a little rat.
Who's a rat?
- Leave me alone!
- Stop that!
Whose daughter is this?
It's his.
Not at all.
Never miss a chance to communicate.
Menstruation...
"Menstruation, also known as a period,
is a flow of blood
caused by the discharge
of the inner lining of the uterus,
enriched with blood."
That's so cool!
How long does it last?
For a rat,
the cycle lasts five days.
Define your educational principles.
I don't believe in therapists.
I was forced to come.
The idea of talking to a stranger
and then everything's fine
is utter codswallop.
The sessions are highly recommended.
Why?
The fact you can't stay calm
reveals stress.
She's always done that. It's a tic.
You need to free yourself of something.
I don't need to free myself.
There's nothing bothering me.
And you mispronounced my name.
Here we go, heels to butt!
Stinkerbell's a drag with her vote
for the recorder solo. I'll take it.
What a dork.
Bitch!
Calm down!
Are you ok, Janine?
With her tics...
Ok, knees to chest!
Bitch isn't great
for our popularity rating.
I have to get the recorder solo...
Over and out!
"Communicare", hold in common.
Communication helps to solve conflicts.
Conflict solving is badge...
- N three.
- Exactly.
Xavier, you "play" the child.
So get down...
I put myself on the child's level,
like this.
The total listening position.
Could you mime
a tantrum, a refusal to obey...
A form of resistance.
Go on.
You really piss me off.
You piss me off big time.
So, speak to your child.
Beware of non-verbal communication signs
that could show your annoyance.
So don't bite your lips,
don't twist your hands...
Be reassuring.
I keep my eyes on Xavier.
I understand your need for expression.
We'll find a solution together
in order to appease both sides.
There.
All right, who wants to try?
I'm goin' out, I told you!
You're not my dad!
I understand your need for expression.
- I'm goin' out.
- No, we can communicate.
That's good.
- Loser!
- Watch your mouth.
I'll give you a slap.
No, control yourself.
- This is absurd.
- No, it gets results.
Just try a little harder.
I understand...
- Go to your place!
- All right.
No raised fingers.
They hamper understanding.
- Stop hitting me!
- Calm down.
You're crazy!
Oh, wow, yes, very amusing.
No, I won't go to bed.
That sucks. It's only 7:30.
I'm not even sleepy.
Ok.
I understand the problem
and appreciate your opinion
but it's important for your growth
to go to bed early.
I apply the win-win method,
which means everyone wins.
That course makes you speak weirdly.
I just try to settle conflicts
with diplomacy.
You're right, Wednesday,
all this is so weird...
You seem worried.
You'd say if you were sick?
I just don't understand
why I'm doing all this.
Grellot stresses me out
with her hearing and family spirit.
Can I help you to prove we're united?
No, I'll manage on my own.
This isn't a game.
See you in the morning, girls.
Good night, Denis.
Kiss the pets for me.
Thanks.
The same motor...
Fender Stratocaster...
Don't know it.
Have you seen my fourth battery?
No.
Looking for something, Gigi?
I really need to help Denis.
He's so down lately.
If anything bad happens,
I'll never forgive myself.
But Denis said he didn't want help.
It's not a game so we mustn't help him.
Don't worry,
I'll find something simple.
You'd better not, Gigi.
Robert's right. It's wiser.
Every new idea makes things worse.
Something to do with family spirit.
Spirit, wherever you may be,
I call on you.
Cross the mountains,
over time and space,
and appear before me.
What's going on?
The spirit's here!
I heard something...
It's the spirit!
Spirit, wherever you may be,
I call on you.
I quit, this is way too scary.
Shit...
Shit,
it's Mum sending us a sign.
Thank you.
Over and out.
Caroline at the Circus.
A circus show.
That's what we'll do to show Sverine
how close we are.
Yeah? So how do we eat fire?
I'll find a tutorial.
If you offer me beef stew after two days,
I get to meet your parents next week?
Sorry, but I think
we'll leave it at that. Bye.
- Good evening.
- Hello, Sverine.
Want to race?
I'm not very competitive,
plus I'm nearly done.
- Me too.
- Really?
Done!
A small tank.
I win.
Well played.
Bravo.
Your pump is slow.
If I press on full,
fuel vapours leak out from the tank
but you pay for them anyway.
It takes motivation.
It's all money saved.
It pays for the class photo
at the year's end.
I'll see you tomorrow morning?
Just between you and me,
don't you find the coaching
and badges a bit dumb?
Denis...
In the real world,
you know, outside your house,
there are rules.
The girls will come up against them
and it's your duty to prepare them, see?
Know what I think of the real world?
It makes me sick.
Mums and guinea pigs
die without any warning.
I won't prepare them for that.
I'm happy to make them think
that fireflies
will soon illuminate the world,
or that the streets are full
of cute bunnies
that do candy droppings.
A little nonchalance goes a long way!
You and I form a team, like it or not.
Your hearing must be perfect.
You're in hot water.
...Say allowance.
#For the tax department, say tax.
Tax...
#If you have a partner, say partner.
If you're single, say single.
I'm not really single.
I don't understand.
The Yule logs...
That one has a unicorn!
Main menu.
Shit...
I'm the manager.
Fancy a glass of champagne?
Sure, I'd love one.
Think this is a buffet?
Ah, that...
- We prefer to try before we invest...
- Want to try?
No, follow me please.
Leave the children with someone.
Can't they wait here?
Girls this age
don't stay alone in my store.
Get a friend to watch them
or it's the police.
Cool! It's ages since I saw Patrick!
#Hi, the answering machine is broken.
This is the toaster.
#Speak slowly,
I never took a message before. Bye.
Nothing.
Hi, this is Sweet Pussy.
I'm closed for Christmas, silly.
#But Mother Christmas is here
to swap gifts.
Not every number...
Hold on a second, it's Christmas.
Just a second.
And Auntie Sverine?
She'll come to watch us.
Are you nuts. She's the last one
I'd call. To say what?
Want the police to call her?
Keep your friends close
and your enemies even closer.
The cinnamon sak is free?
Ok, I'll take that.
How long to deliver?
Yes, Merry Christmas.
Goodbye.
Why the hell am I here?
Your dad's got a nerve!
"It's urgent, we're a team..."
A team now!
Were you with your family?
Yes, of course.
What was so urgent?
- What's wrong?
- I need to pee!
What?
I'll take you home, girls.
No, now we're here, let's go bowling.
No, if anything happens,
Im responsible.
C'mon, please, I want to bowl too.
Taking an interest in sport is great,
but you need to get home and rest.
Why?
Rest allows the body to recuperate.
What does "recuperate" mean?
It'll be tough if you don't give in.
Hold on, let me talk to your sister, ok?
So, "recuperate" means
you recover your strength.
Now let's end these sterile negotiations.
Do I get a present if I stop negotiating?
Rest is a present you give to yourself.
Theory and practice differ.
Let me finish.
When you rest, your brain...
Your brain rests at the same time
along with your neurones.
What are neurones?
Go, Sverine!
That was fantastic!
What are you doing?
Hold on, Sverine...
Sverine, you just did a strike!
A strike!
You have to celebrate with at least
a "Guys, I rock!"
That's the minimum.
Let's hear you say it!
I rock!
That totally sucks!
Even I didn't hear it.
Watch this...
I rock! I aced that fucking ball!
Who cares?
Come on.
You'll see, it's liberating.
Ok... I rock!
No, louder!
I rock!
Let yourself go!
- I rock!
- Again!
I rock!
- Fantastic!
- She rocks, she rocks!
Go for it, Wednesday!
Janine! Janine!
Go, Janine!
Good one, Wednesday!
Stop that!
Yeah! I rock!
You've worn me out.
I'll get you home.
I wore myself out.
Big surprise.
Can I ask you something?
Why did you choose this job?
You're very curious...
When I was your age,
my dad went out for cigarettes
and when he finally came back, I was 25.
That wouldn't have happened with vaping.
- So subtle...
- What?
That day, I decided it was my duty
to help children.
My turn now.
Why do you call him Denis and not Dad?
When you say Dad, you want to say Mum too.
Will they split us up?
Not if you all keep trying so hard.
Thanks a million for looking after them.
I'll take over now
There were preparing a surprise
and asked me to stay.
I couldn't refuse at Christmas.
They insisted.
They went like this...
I couldn't resist...
I taught them to do that.
We can't go up then?
No, it's a surprise.
Ok...
Mum, don't let us down.
Over and out.
Show time!
You knew they were preparing...
No, I don't know anything about it.
The suspense is complete.
I'm nervous
because I don't know what'll happen.
- Here we go.
- Hello.
Who's that?
That's a child...
It's Christmas. You're not at home?
Yes, but my mum's on duty
and won't be back before 11 pm.
Should I go or...
You can stay for once.
Even if we're not totally ready,
#here's a sneak preview
of the Fabulous Patars' Little Circus!
Bravo!
What's that?
Fireflies?
Yes, fireflies...
Janine raises them.
We'll use them for light soon.
I'm deadly serious.
- Beautiful, huh?
- Magnificent.
Less beautiful when they die.
Much less.
It's really tough. They lived what...
The duration of a show.
But the show must go on...
Now,
welcome a terrifying monster...
Cornelia!
You have a goat?
Yes.
Meet Cornelia, part goat, part lion.
Look at her fabulous black and white coat
from the Patar winter collection!
Bravo, Cornelia!
Thank you.
Let's hear it for Cornelia!
Don't worry, we're on top of it.
It's ok, if you want I can...
- I can belch the alphabet.
- Ok.
Ladies and gentlemen, tonight
you'll see a unique wrestling bout!
Let's hear it for Wednesday Jawbreaker...
Versus Gigi the Weirdo!
Here we go!
You think you're smart. I'll waste you.
I'll eat your guts!
I'll strangle you with your own innards!
I'll rip out the heart you don't have!
I don't have a heart?
Go on, waste her!
Bitch!
I'll waste you, slut!
Screw the umpire!
- You surrender?
- Never!
Ok, I surrender.
That's it.
Now, before your astounded gaze,
I shall...
Cut Wednesday in half!
That's a real saw!
I found a way to make it work on the Net.
Where's this from?
We swapped it for an old guitar we found.
An old...
My Fender?
My Fender?
Ok, we're not ready yet
but we will be for the judge.
Who do you mean, "we'?
I told you to stay out of it.
Girls, you don't see the judge.
That's not normal.
Why not?
The show proves were together.
That's the problem.
You and your sister won't be able
to open life's closed doors
because you don't have the keys.
We'll use the windows.
What were you thinking?
With this crazy stuff,
you're heading for a foster family!
Sverine's right, you're a useless father!
Take that!
Janine...
It's sick what you're doing to us.
We've been preparing this for months.
And you spoil everything!
We thought you'd be pleased.
We were scared.
I hate you!
Thanks.
You're welcome. Bye.
120 euros?
Not much for such a spot.
We can always take it down again.
No, it's ok.
It's better than nothing.
Sign here, please.
Now this...
ADVERTISING SPACE FOR RENMato, tell me what the score is.
22 for Harmonie,
two for Janine.
Bravo!
Harmonie will do the recorder solo
at the end-of-year concert.
Recorders are totally has-been.
Can't we do something else?
But it's the world's
most beautiful instrument!
I'm fighting to have it
reinstated in the school programme.
You have no choice.
Go on, girls.
Thank you, Mato.
That's enough!
Piece of shit, dumb bitch, slut...
She'll hear.
It's not for you.
My mouth takes over from my mind.
Calm down.
- She's talking to herself?
- She's mad.
Watch this.
Janine...
Foul demon, leave this body!
That's a mean thing to do.
That's so cute!
He defends her.
May I go out?
It's over in five minutes.
This is a song from 1866.
- Imagine their kids.
- What a nightmare!
Calm down.
Cool... Zen...
Shit...
Are you crazy?
Madam, do something!
What's going on?
She broke my nose!
You broke her nose with...
You're out of your mind!
Get to the principal's office!
I'm sick of her! My God...
- Let me see.
- Leave me alone!
I was about to get a badge
when the school called!
I had to make up
some crazy excuse to leave.
Imagine what'll happen
if Grellot finds out!
I'm sorry, Denis.
I didn't mean to do it.
I feel really weird lately.
Listen...
I understand how you feel
and that's the way you feel
when you grow up.
You're like a little square
on a Rubik's cube
looking for its place.
It's not easy but...
If you keep at it, you'll find it.
Understand?
No.
Forget it.
From now on, we simplify things.
I'll write you a note
so you can skip your music class.
But I dream of doing the show too!
Screw your dreams,
screw your teenage problems!
We keep a low profile
until my course is over.
Is it a teen meltdown
or not? I don't get it anymore.
No, it's not a meltdown.
Change tack and see a neurologist.
A neurologist?
A neurologist
will approach it differently.
He'll find a solution, see.
Right, Janine?
It'll be ok.
I swear, Roby, we're all going crazy here.
Especially me.
I can't control myself.
When I type in the weird stuff you do,
I get the same result...
Tourette's syndrome.
#The connections in the brain
governing self-control
Are deregulated in Tourette's sufferers.
#It's a struggle with myself
to bring my tics under control.
It wears me out.
#If there are people around,
they give me strange looks.
I sit on my hands.
#I see them thinking,
"Who's that weirdo?"
I snapped my fingers non-stop.
#We saw a doctor
who diagnosed the syndrome.
I shout insults without meaning to.
People think I do it to show off.
The others think I'm a bit crazy.
#It's like being in a bubble
on a tiny cloud.
#I feel like I'm locked
in something that I can't control.
It's normal you didn't notice.
It worsens during adolescence.
The pressure to be like others
increases then too.
- So I'm not mad?
- Not at all.
It must be something else.
She has hardly any tics.
I control them.
Then they return like a boomerang,
even stronger than before?
Do you fit in at school?
There's Robert...
You have other friends, don't you?
Let's say it's that.
How is it treated?
Well, for now,
we can't treat this syndrome.
But, luckily, you can learn
to manage your excess energy.
You need behavioural therapy.
How fast does it work?
Like a marathon, it's long.
Isn't there anything quicker?
I'll prescribe neuroleptics.
No neuroleptics.
No way.
She'll control herself
and get back to normal.
That won't happen!
I'm sick of having tics, of being weird,
of not being like others.
I'm sick of being me, see.
I'm sick of being me.
It's a temporary measure.
There are side effects, true.
At first, you may find Janine...
What makes a good parent?
What are your educational principles?
What is your family spirit?
Well...
We're very close.
What do they mean
by educational principles?
Liberty, maybe.
I apolo...
"Because of rheumatism in her fingers,
Janine Patar cannot play the recorder
for a while."
Apologize to your classmate
and then go to the study room.
Forgive me, Harmonie.
It won't happen again.
Stop that!
I'm very happy with the test results.
You're all making really great progress.
Denis,
your analysis
of the career and family life tandem
is excellent.
Thank you.
Gigi!
You took your time.
That was a great show.
Why didn't Gigi come?
She didn't come
because the pills tire her out.
I want my mum.
Wednesday...
Wednesday...
Wait for me.
I didn't know
specialists cost a bomb.
So I'm ready to come back to work.
Sorry, I had no choice.
That's ok, it doesn't matter.
Don't worry about it.
Did I mention my bathroom?
I need to redecorate.
I'd pay you to help me.
That's kind, but I'll manage.
Thanks, Pierrot.
Bye, Denis.
You're pretending.
I can tell.
I'm here. Go to your bed now.
Janine!
Come on!
Wake up!
Are you ok?
What did you do?
- What did you do?
- Sorry.
I'm ok.
You gave me a fright.
The Fabulous Patars' Little Circus
Patary is more like a circus.
Parental course hearing
Goodbye, Patricia.
Isn't Denis here?
He hasn't come.
Jean-Benot, let's go.
"She wouldn't have bothered us,
the werewolves aren't..."
Surprise!
Look who I found looking unhappy
in the garden.
Look what I have.
- Honey Loops.
- Real ones?
Of course they're real ones.
We won the lottery?
No, I went wild with the credit card.
Totally wild.
Just for you, beauty.
- What is it?
- I need my pill.
Hold on, I wanted...
I wanted to tell you something important.
Your show was fantastic, really fantastic.
Full of our family spirit.
Ok?
So good...
- Finally...
- Yeah.
You forgot your hearing, Mr Patar?
How about a hello?
Come on, let's go.
Hold on, you have some glitter here.
There.
You're perfect now. Let's go.
I forgot to tell you something.
We won't be going.
Why not?
My spontaneity is gone.
I don't recognize myself.
And you fooled me completely
with your badge idea.
I do what I can
with the tools they give me.
I won't do any more odd jobs
with your tools.
All right.
So what'll you do?
What'll I do?
I'm going to hire a lawyer.
And take out a 100-year loan to pay him.
You're being a teen.
- A teen?
- Yes.
You realize that despite all your skills,
neither you nor I
noticed how Janine was suffering?
So my priority now is my daughter.
You've got a nerve blaming me!
Goodbye.
There we go.
Good riddance.
You like her.
Are you kidding?
Now that she's gone,
I can go to wrestling again.
I'll sign you up for judo.
She wasn't entirely wrong.
You can go in your mask.
We'll manage without your pills.
If Robert agrees.
So that's that.
There.
Will it start again?
No, I have a different idea.
Ill have a basic burger
and a chicky burger too.
- We got a crunchy chicken?
- Yes.
Three of them.
That's 21.90 euros, please.
- No!
- What?
I'm going to pay.
Where's all that from?
You sold some of my stuff?
Did I tell you Kevins mum
thinks you're really cute?
You sold my stuff.
Here
My Walkman? My rollerblades?
No.
Watch!
You've made a real mess!
Your attention, please.
Wednesday, I wanted to say
I'm sorry for missing your dance show
and for the scare with the pills.
Anyhow, to make up for it,
I got you a present.
That's kind.
- I made them.
- Great!
- You like them?
- They're mega beautiful!
Let me see.
- You like them?
- Thank you!
- You made them?
- How long did it take?
- You're clever.
- I love them.
- I have presents too.
- Yeah?
This is for you.
Why's the lady in her panties?
Not panties, a swimsuit.
That's so cute! Bunny ears!
You can wear them to school.
Do they suit me?
You look fantastic.
And this is for you.
For me?
She's really weird.
A Rubik's cube.
That's so sweet. Thanks.
You remember?
Cut it out!
She's not some circus freak!
Just give us a break!
Stop yelling. Are you nuts or what?
It's normal for them to stare.
No, it isn't.
Imagine you were sitting near someone
with loads of tics,
you'd look too.
What would you say?
Here's what I'd say:
That's how the Patars are!
Stop that, it's not funny.
It's been hell for me without the pills.
- Be strong.
- You don't get it!
It's like a thing that really annoys you,
but that you can't fight against.
You try, but you can't.
Yes, I understand...
Here's my problem.
Listen, I have an idea.
"The undersigned,
Gigi and Denis Patar,
agree on the following:
Denis must...
Must..."
Resist dessert!
"...Resist dessert."
I didn't expect that.
Frequent girls over 14.
That won't be easy.
And stop smoking for good.
And vaping counts too.
That's tough.
"Gigi Patar must resist
making noise with...
With every object
that she finds
and control her tics in public."
All right?
What about me?
Why? Are you a smoker?
You have bulimia or Tourette's?
Well then?
We need something like Sverines badges
when we succeed, as a reward.
This.
- A spoon?
- It's good and dumb.
A spoon for each task completed.
No, I have better!
- Samurai sauce?
- Yes.
Ok.
All right!
Good idea.
- I'll respect the contract.
- Me too!
With my blood.
A blood pact!
Go on, Denis.
How about that...
- Why's that there?
- Vaporizer!
Farewell.
One spoon for you!
Thank you.
Ready, Janine?
Ready, Denis?
Go!
It's all motor skills.
Right hand, rub, left hand, polish.
Faster.
Fucking sponge!
Yeah...
Don't worry about cursing.
I saw on the Net it's called coprolalia.
You curse against your will.
When you say, "for fuck's sake",
that's your copro-thing?
Right now, I want to say fuck.
Cheat!!
I win! I win!
I win!
Spoon!
Cheese!
We'll try more effective therapy.
Cornelia!
Caprinotherapy.
It was tough getting the neurologist
to prescribe it.
My wife died three years ago
and I still pay tax on her salary.
I don't have the death certificate.
- Did you send it?
- Of course.
Sorry, but I'll need to start
the whole file over again.
You'll need to be patient.
Honey, not here, not now.
Is she ok?
Bitch!
Don't worry, it'll soon pass...
Not now.
Shall I call someone?
No, it won't help.
It's Tourette's.
Poor kid...
Listen, I'll see what I can do.
Given the situation...
That's kind of you.
It's sorted out.
You'll received the refund
in a week or so.
- Good luck.
- You know, it's not easy.
That was one wicked Tourettes fit!
Even better than at Family Allowance.
This thing is wild.
I had the idea of the pee squeezer
for the allowance calculation.
All right!
We're on a roll, let's do Pierrot!
A crazy thing happened last night.
"They" wrecked the automatic tills.
How did "they" do it?
"They" spread a sort of sticky liquid,
an aphrodisiac massage oil, all over them.
Devilish, but clever.
All the tills are out of order
so the store needs...
An old-style cashier.
Trouble is,
I've found a better-paid job.
What if I give you a raise
and add luncheon vouchers?
Health care?
Category B, but that's the best I can do.
Forget it.
Cheapskate!
Ok, you win.
Parental course assessment
Approved / Rejected
No God, no Mathematics Teacher
- Don't go out!
- Let go!
- Stay here!
- Let go!
Let go of me now!
Stay!
Stop it!
Hi, Sverine.
They do this each time
I want to buy cigarettes.
It's a drag.
A problem?
I hesitated about coming,
but I thought we ought to talk.
Yeah, sure.
I've been thinking about your decision
not to attend the hearing.
It's never happened before,
but I have to admit it's brave of you.
I didn't think that way.
I know.
I'd love to do things by instinct,
ignoring the consequences.
I always have to weigh the pros and cons.
The heart versus reason.
Or reason versus feelings.
"The heart has its reasons
of which reason knows nothing."
Blaise Pascal.
And...
"The bed's reasons are always better."
That one was Coluche.
It's funny, huh?
I can't get a handle on you.
But that's not unpleasant.
That there...
That's non-verbal communication
when you do that
with your hair.
Yes, exactly.
My classes aren't that useless.
No, they leave a mark.
They sink in?
Bravo, Denis,
and thanks for your help, Sverine.
- You aced it.
- Yeah!
Spoon!
What did he ace?
The spoons replace your badges
for an ordeal.
Exactly.
So what was the ordeal?
He had to talk to a girl aged...
Over 14.
What do you...
I get it. So I'm an ordeal?
Not at all.
That's good.
I didn't know.
Ill get back to work.
I just wanted to tell you that.
Bye, girls.
See you!
- Hold on..
- Bye.
I was being sincere!
What are you playing at?
- Screw the spoons.
- No way!
We were chatting.
You're always in my hair
and I need to be able to breathe a bit.
- Screw your spoon.
- Keep it, you earned it.
I don't want it!
We screwed up with Sverine.
We sucked big time.
How's the list coming along?
I tidy my desk every night,
I manage my laces nearly every time
and I control my tics better.
You're a great fighter.
Better than I am.
No, I can't go in there.
You go. I'll wait here.
I'm going.
If you can't face reality,
you'll keep lying to us
and we'll never move on.
For instance...
What'll you do when we both leave home?
I don't know. I'll get bored.
We don't want that,
so we'll stay with you and ruin our lives.
You have to accept it now.
It's like Ziggy.
We know you replace him each time he dies.
That's ridiculous.
He's never the same colour!
Everyone knows
guinea pigs change colour when they moult.
Yeah, sure.
To Ziggy.
When I met you,
the way you moved your little snout
won me over instantly.
You were the smartest rodent
that I ever got to meet.
You were against everything
and I was
right there against you.
I loved the way you involved me
in the fight
against GMOs in sunflower seeds,
for freedom for Tibetan gerbils,
and above all against
the jackals in power.
Fortunately,
your daughters...
Your friends, more like...
Have inherited
your uncommon energy.
You'd tell me,
in the language...
Of guinea pigs, of course...
That another world was possible.
Thank you for letting me live on Mars.
Over and out.
Over and out.
Are you ok?
You scared me.
I'll help with the bathroom.
Thanks, that's great.
But it wasn't that urgent.
I was thinking...
A brownish grey colour.
Isn't brownish grey a bit gloomy?
I was thinking more of a sunflower colour...
Denis...
Come here.
Patar... The father didn't attend
the end-of-course hearing.
Our moral contract with him
was not respected.
For me, he's irresponsible.
Hold on, he didn't take
primary school kids hostage.
No, but the childrens conditions
are far from favourable
and Mr Patar won't face reality.
On reading your report,
he isn't an ideal father.
Hold on, do you know any ideal parents?
- No, but that's not the issue.
- It is.
Look at you.
Your dad has a great job,
your mum stopped work to raise you,
so you have no problems?
That's not exactly true.
Even well-balanced parents aren't perfect.
And you, Franky.
Jewish dad, Muslim mum.
How's the Gaza Strip?
Fine, what's the problem?
He fits none of the criteria,
proving there's no ideal.
This father...
Ok, it's true, his place isn't exactly
neat and tidy.
I don't get it.
He won't face reality.
We've said that already.
What's the problem?
The girls lost their mother.
They can't lose their father!
We worked from your report.
I've looked deeper into it since.
Were here about the children.
- Precisely.
- Objectively.
- I am being objective.
- You're not.
I've had new information since,
notably his daughter's illness.
It's important.
That's not our problem.
What matters
is how we protect the children.
You're siding a little too much
with Mr Patar.
He didn't respect the contract.
I'm bringing in a judge.
Give them one last chance.
See them together.
I won't back down
unless you come up with new info.
But Im bringing in a judge, sorry.
Next case.
Alexis Talls.
Listen to me.
A quick note...
Well, a little tape...
#to apologize about the spoon incident
the other day.
#Even if I know you'll do your best,
the girls and I have a back-up plan.
#We'll go and hole up in the country,
we haven't decided where yet.
Like Bonnie and Clyde on the run.
#Without guns, just with a goat
and a thermos of hot chocolate.
By the way, we ate zucchini yesterday.
#They weren't that delicious,
but they were edible.
And you're not an ordeal,
Sverine Grellot.
All right then...
Bye.
Over and out.
Let's hear it for class 6B.
Thank you!
Give them a big hand!
Carry on.
You've come for the show!
I'd really like to take part.
Sorry, you haven't rehearsed.
- I know it by heart.
- Not well enough.
You can't stand between a child
and her dream.
I'm sorry.
I beseech you!
Mr Patar!
Violaine, please!
It's not fair on those
who've worked so hard.
I can't, it'll endanger their work. No!
Welcome Mrs Cramelle's class,
4C, that will play "Le temps des cerises".
It doesn't matter.
Besides,
I'd have screwed up in public
and let you down.
No.
I want to make one thing clear.
Whatever you do, you'll never let me down.
Thanks, Dad.
Dad?
Hi, Didi.
Everything ok?
Where's the family?
You don't know?
I'm just over there, ok?
It'll be less fun without you.
You'll blow them away.
A beautiful love song
from the Paris Commune.
When we sing
Of cherry time
The joyful nightingale
And the mocking blackbird
Will all make merry together...
Let's find your sister.
- I don't want to see the show.
- Why not?
- I don't.
- We can't stay here.
We'd have had a laugh.
Right?
No.
Know what?
- We'll do something together.
- Ok.
Patar-style.
All right.
Mind if they throw us out?
No.
Listen carefully...
Join us!
I need to talk to you!
I saw what you did before.
Look at me. Calm...
Cool... Zen.
Calm...
Cool...
Zen.
You, do this!
You do this...
And you do this.
Go on.
Sverine!
Come on, don't be so useless.
I am a bit useless.
Hold on...
Come on, join in.
That's it!
Yes, Mato, come on!
Come on, Capucine!
Patar Power!
Yes!
Come on, Sverine!
More noise with the movements!
Can't hear you!
Gigi, you're wild!
She's my daughter!
The Patars rule!
Someone fought hard for you.
I'm going.
Goodbye.
I tested a new concept:
the open-air hearing.
That was my boss.
- He was the...
- Yes.
It was almost a disaster...
It was close.
We felt the heat.
So...
Would you like to have a drink?
I think I'll regret it,
but we're not quite ready.
Not even a bit ready?
She's still kind of present.
Give her time to pack.
You're right.
I'll be going.
I have other families to help.
You're Mary Poppins.
You mend families and then vanish.
But...
Why don't you stay for once?
Maybe you didn't notice,
but Mary Poppins fears commitment.
So she has a shit life.
Yeah.
I'll check the chimney just in case.
- You never know.
- Ok.
The chimney is for Santa...
Right, I mix them up.
Well...
Goodbye then.
Supercalifragi...
Supercalifragilistic...
Superfrati...
You know it.
Expialidocious.
Expialidocious.
See you.
- So, are we going?
- Yes.
Zen.
- Where's Didi?
- No idea.
- You're crazy!
- Don't mock my sister!
Get lost, germ!
- Are you ready?
- Yes!
Let's go.
Here we go!
Robert!
Wait for me!
- Come on, run!
- Faster!
Faster, Dad!
Unicorn Power!
- What subject?
- French.
- I'll give you five, ok?
- Yeah.
- Thanks. Goodbye.
- Next.
Swimming class. I hate swimsuits.
Head lice
- Five euros, please.
- Thanks.
Next.
- Hello.
- What subject?
Monday's maths test.
I'll give you ten big ones
so you'll be suspended.
Scratch yourself a lot
so the teachers take it seriously.
Five euros, please.
Thank you.
Sorry, sold out!
Over and out.
Caro...
Ok, guys, here we go!
Who needs a sign?
You're going to OD on that thing.
Are you ok?
Yes.
Want hot chocolate?
I'm ok.
- A cigarette?
- No, I'm fine.
- Denis.
- Caroline.
Want to come with us?
Here, grab a sign. Let's go.
Ok, here we go!
Mister Minister, your bill is sinister!
Stick it where the sun never shines!
THE FABULOUS PATARS
Why are you against the PM's policy?
Could he live with 3,800 francs a month?
His shoes cost that! It's sick!
I believe another world is possible!
I really believe it!
Le Pen, you're fucked so bad,
the youth are hopping mad!
Le Pen, you're fucked so bad
the youth are hopping mad!
Gigi! Janine!
What a fright, sweetheart.
THE PRESENT DAY
Janine, come and see.
What is it?
Ziggy's all stiff.
Shit, not again...
Over here, it's like he's eating.
- I guess.
- Go and wake Denis.
Unicorn Power!
- That hurts!
- It's all flabby!
Heard of sport?
These aren't John Cena's abs!
Anyone can look ripped with Photoshop.
The tune's better...
For pity's sake, not the recorder!
It sounds better in the garden.
Leave me be now.
Love you, girls.
Come on, leave me now.
Off you go.
Go on...
I told you I wouldn't go to this.
Try seeing girls aged over 14.
Love you!
- Your card?
- Not got one.
You're under four?
Sit down.
Thank you!
They're up to four million views.
- Hi, Robert.
- Hi, Wednesday.
Hold on...
Don't tell me you still have head lice?
No way.
Hey! Wait!
We forgot the canteen cheque again.
- Denis!
- He's too much!
He'll burn his Nutella calories.
Go, Denis!
This guy's crazy!
See my dad? He did it!
#Halloween at Happy Garden:
buy one rat, get one free.
I'm disturbing your nap?
Shit, I'm sorry.
The last one.
That's great. That one will work.
They'll understand if you explain.
I can't traumatize them.
Wednesday's so fragile...
Give me a break.
- For Sunday's inventory...
- Yeah?
It'll be paid in days off.
You do too much overtime.
C'mon, Pierrot, you know days off
aren't what I need.
I know. Here...
#Denis Patar,
urgent message at reception.
I'll take over.
How are the mass units coming?
What's a DG?
It's...
No cheating.
- A decigram...
- A decigram!
Keep quiet, I'm questioning her.
Sure that's what a DG is?
So what's 83?
Tons... Three tons is 3,000 kilos.
Sorry. The school called me.
Mr Patar, this is the third time
in a month.
The third?
He's doing what he can.
Not enough, apparently.
I was asked to send an LC
to the prosecutor.
What's an LC?
A Letter of Concern. I had no choice.
- I reported you.
- Reported me?
Isn't that a bit much for half an hour?
Mr Patar,
do I look like a nanny?
No...
- See you, Patrick.
- Ease off the wrestling.
- Don't worry.
- Let's go.
Take your cap.
- Kisses!
- Thanks. Sorry...
Is my tongue blue?
- Bye, Wednesday.
- Bye, Michel.
You're jealous.
I'm not jealous.
You're jealous of my lollipops.
Janine, hurry!
Come on, move it!
Let me fetch her.
Next year maybe.
Try trusting me.
It's the world I don't trust.
Understand?
As usual, girls, don't stay up...
Too late!
I have to go.
- A kiss!
- Here you go.
See you!
Denis, kiss the pets for me.
Of course. Bye.
Go inside to bed.
I'll be a night veterinarian too one day.
Sweet Pussy
Video screening
"When Jessica saw that Jeff
no longer had the Eye of the Moon,
#she plunged her clawed hand
into his chest
And ripped out his heart.
Blood and guts began to pour out.
'You fucking bastard,'
she screamed at Bourbon Kid,
spitting blood.
#Then, as the total eclipse
reached its peak
#and Santa Mondega was plunged
into darkness,
Jeff heard the fatal words:
Fill the glass."
I can see you're not sleeping.
You were practicing again?
You're like New York, alive 24/7.
The fireflies soon die.
I have plenty of larvae.
That big one, with the blank eyes...
He looks like Robert.
Go to sleep now.
Sweet dreams, beauty.
Release me.
Easy application
You're looking good.
No...
There, none the wiser.
"Dear Sir/Madam,
following a Letter of Concern
in relation to your children,
a social worker
will be evaluating your situation
by coming to your place of abode
on November 27th at eight am."
We'll end up in an orphanage
and you in jail?
No...
You don't need to put your hand up
to speak.
This isn't the gulag.
In #The Rescuers#, the girl
escapes from the orphanage
and ends up in the bayou.
Bayous are in the USA.
They won't send you that far.
But they may not put you with Gigi.
It's amazing,
this gift you have for always butting in
at the wrong time.
Get out! Go on!
Listen...
Isn't today the 27th?
The 27th?
Fuck!
Come on!
If you're questioned, be polite.
Christian and straight.
Come on, hurry!
Blond, thin, Swedish.
Denis, the cube!
Stuff to keep, in the bucket!
Throw this out, quick!
It's 7:43!
Get rid of this thing.
Hurry up.
Curtain... Staple-gun...
7:46...
Girls, I'm counting on you.
Janine, take it easy.
Cool.
Zen.
I can do it.
All right... Let's go.
I've no coffee. Chocolate?
No, thanks. Let's get started.
I have other families after.
The prosecutor's office
has had several alerts,
starting with your bank.
Is that really your business?
Mr Patar, I need to understand
the way you live
and the household budget is part of that.
We manage it as best we can.
We've paid tax monthly on our two salaries
for three years now.
And so we try to...
Pay attention to everything.
Yeah, for instance,
on Saturdays,
we picnic on the supermarket aisles.
We save loads of money that way.
Smart, huh?
Yes, smart is the word.
I see that you've refused
family allowance grants
for household help.
Yes, because we don't need anyone.
You need a hand with cleaning.
Sorry, but something smells of vinegar.
That's me.
Wednesday...
You put your hand up to speak.
You know that. I keep telling her.
Why Wednesday?
Caroline called her that
cos David Bowie was born on a Wednesday.
And she's Janine
cos that's one of his songs.
Bowie is part of the family.
I see.
David Bowie, the singer.
Yes, I've heard of him.
What did you want to say, Wednesday?
Go ahead.
Well, since I have head-lice,
Denis puts vinegar on my hair.
It's much cheaper
than pharmacy products,
but it really stings the eyes.
Less than the flea stuff for dogs
we tried.
These lice are really resistant...
It's as if she's raising them.
I see that on top of the mortgage,
there's a large monthly loan payment.
Can you tell me what that is?
That was the funeral.
- It was brilliant.
- Totally! A dream funeral.
I see... But 15,000 euros
is a bit much, isn't it?
They wanted to plan it all.
It had to be cool.
When you die, it's for good.
You bet. It was cheaper to burn Mum,
but we didn't like the idea.
Janine, stop.
Stop doing that.
You know, when people die,
you can't bury them uncovered
or they rot too fast.
I didn't know.
We had a special cardboard coffin made
And decorated it with peonies.
Her favourites.
We rented a bubble machine.
And hired a band too.
That's enough!
No need for the details.
Mr Patar,
I need to see the girls alone.
I'm not leaving them.
It won't take long.
Please.
Denis is totally cool.
He's an ace hacker
for zoo and movie tickets.
We don't need money.
"A candy if you clean your teeth..."
He works nights in a pet store.
"On the black," he says.
It can't be easy in the dark.
Denis and our grandparents
are like gremlins.
Five minutes in the same room,
they devour each other.
I see...
We get presents for tidying up.
Willy-shaped pasta with Nutella?
He lets us sleep if we're tired,
even if we have school.
If we let him sleep on Sundays,
we go to the King of Fries.
When Mum...
I was angry
so he enrolled me for wrestling.
Cool.
What did your mum do?
She wrote demo chants.
She wrote "Mister Minister"
and she was only 14.
How does that one go?
Mister Minister, your bill is sinister!
Your bill, your bill
Mister Minister, your bill is sinister!
Stick it where the sun never shines!
Remove custody?
For the law, you're incompetent.
Why? We're fine.
Who do you mean by "we"?
The nights alone,
the police station,
the funeral arrangements...
Don't you see how stressed Janine is?
Have you seen a therapist?
A therapist?
Isn't that a bit much?
The courts can prosecute
parents who neglect
their parental obligations.
I back up the prosecutor
who recommends
a parental responsibility course.
We'll send you the papers.
Hold on a second.
I do all I can
to keep our heads above water
and you advise a course?
Think I have time for tea and cakes?
I have jobs to do and bills to pay!
I'm here to help your girls.
If you refuse,
the next step is a court hearing
and, given the situation,
they'll end up in a foster home.
For the law, you're incompetent.
#We'll go to an orphanage
and you to jail?
They'll end up in a foster home.
Actually, I'm doing really great.
I even have some good news for you.
I'm listening.
Let me explain.
Actually...
I'm planning to group together
all my comp time
to do professional training
over several weeks.
Not Bowie...
Are you kidding?
- This?
- It's cute.
- Cute?
- Yes, totally!
It's sick.
- Hold on!
- Come to work!
Hands off David.
Or else your smartphone will meet my wall.
And that'll be sick!
- Denis can't come to work.
- Your things.
He's having a heart amputation
at Santa Mondega.
Lots of love!
What're you doing?
Hello?
Pierrot?
I sorted it all out.
Don't thank me.
I love talking to Pierrot.
He's just like John Cena.
He pisses me off.
You piss me off.
Stop that, you.
You all piss me off.
Launched in 2007 as part of the law
against delinquency,
the parental course
helps to remind failing parents
of the obligations in raising a child.
This process will allow you
to improve your educational skills.
The final hearing
is with Child Assistance.
If all goes well, and it should,
we'll close your case.
If not, legal proceedings begin.
Any questions?
Mrs Grellot, I'm shocked.
"Educational skills"?
It sounds like a job interview.
True, the term is a little off-putting.
You talk about a hearing.
But a hearing for what?
How can I put this?
It evaluates your family spirit.
Wouldn't it be wiser to work case by case?
What do we have in common?
Theory is one thing,
but daily life,
managing work and the kids, isn't easy.
- The lady's right!
- I know.
Do you have children yourself?
I bet you don't.
I think you need an outside gaze.
Someone with a global and detached view
of your family.
As we work, I'll give you badges...
For each step made.
There are seven. It's very motivating.
Like a bad driver's course.
If you like.
You could say that.
How'll our kids respect us
with your badges?
- He's right.
- This is ridiculous.
We're not children!
Play along with it!
It sucks.
- It's to optimize...
- Listen.
The course is obligatory
so let's get down to work.
We'll begin by tidying up your lives
thanks to frames.
Badge N1.
Stability.
First, create a cocoon
#in which both parents
can protect the children.
I'm sorry.
Your eyes are as beautiful as each other.
They're a very lovely oyster colour.
Children need bearings.
Put things back in their place,
With tact and firmness.
- You have to.
- It sucks!
I don't want to!
Go on.
Point on the right foot behind...
Move to the side and close.
You're as cute as a little rat.
Who's a rat?
- Leave me alone!
- Stop that!
Whose daughter is this?
It's his.
Not at all.
Never miss a chance to communicate.
Menstruation...
"Menstruation, also known as a period,
is a flow of blood
caused by the discharge
of the inner lining of the uterus,
enriched with blood."
That's so cool!
How long does it last?
For a rat,
the cycle lasts five days.
Define your educational principles.
I don't believe in therapists.
I was forced to come.
The idea of talking to a stranger
and then everything's fine
is utter codswallop.
The sessions are highly recommended.
Why?
The fact you can't stay calm
reveals stress.
She's always done that. It's a tic.
You need to free yourself of something.
I don't need to free myself.
There's nothing bothering me.
And you mispronounced my name.
Here we go, heels to butt!
Stinkerbell's a drag with her vote
for the recorder solo. I'll take it.
What a dork.
Bitch!
Calm down!
Are you ok, Janine?
With her tics...
Ok, knees to chest!
Bitch isn't great
for our popularity rating.
I have to get the recorder solo...
Over and out!
"Communicare", hold in common.
Communication helps to solve conflicts.
Conflict solving is badge...
- N three.
- Exactly.
Xavier, you "play" the child.
So get down...
I put myself on the child's level,
like this.
The total listening position.
Could you mime
a tantrum, a refusal to obey...
A form of resistance.
Go on.
You really piss me off.
You piss me off big time.
So, speak to your child.
Beware of non-verbal communication signs
that could show your annoyance.
So don't bite your lips,
don't twist your hands...
Be reassuring.
I keep my eyes on Xavier.
I understand your need for expression.
We'll find a solution together
in order to appease both sides.
There.
All right, who wants to try?
I'm goin' out, I told you!
You're not my dad!
I understand your need for expression.
- I'm goin' out.
- No, we can communicate.
That's good.
- Loser!
- Watch your mouth.
I'll give you a slap.
No, control yourself.
- This is absurd.
- No, it gets results.
Just try a little harder.
I understand...
- Go to your place!
- All right.
No raised fingers.
They hamper understanding.
- Stop hitting me!
- Calm down.
You're crazy!
Oh, wow, yes, very amusing.
No, I won't go to bed.
That sucks. It's only 7:30.
I'm not even sleepy.
Ok.
I understand the problem
and appreciate your opinion
but it's important for your growth
to go to bed early.
I apply the win-win method,
which means everyone wins.
That course makes you speak weirdly.
I just try to settle conflicts
with diplomacy.
You're right, Wednesday,
all this is so weird...
You seem worried.
You'd say if you were sick?
I just don't understand
why I'm doing all this.
Grellot stresses me out
with her hearing and family spirit.
Can I help you to prove we're united?
No, I'll manage on my own.
This isn't a game.
See you in the morning, girls.
Good night, Denis.
Kiss the pets for me.
Thanks.
The same motor...
Fender Stratocaster...
Don't know it.
Have you seen my fourth battery?
No.
Looking for something, Gigi?
I really need to help Denis.
He's so down lately.
If anything bad happens,
I'll never forgive myself.
But Denis said he didn't want help.
It's not a game so we mustn't help him.
Don't worry,
I'll find something simple.
You'd better not, Gigi.
Robert's right. It's wiser.
Every new idea makes things worse.
Something to do with family spirit.
Spirit, wherever you may be,
I call on you.
Cross the mountains,
over time and space,
and appear before me.
What's going on?
The spirit's here!
I heard something...
It's the spirit!
Spirit, wherever you may be,
I call on you.
I quit, this is way too scary.
Shit...
Shit,
it's Mum sending us a sign.
Thank you.
Over and out.
Caroline at the Circus.
A circus show.
That's what we'll do to show Sverine
how close we are.
Yeah? So how do we eat fire?
I'll find a tutorial.
If you offer me beef stew after two days,
I get to meet your parents next week?
Sorry, but I think
we'll leave it at that. Bye.
- Good evening.
- Hello, Sverine.
Want to race?
I'm not very competitive,
plus I'm nearly done.
- Me too.
- Really?
Done!
A small tank.
I win.
Well played.
Bravo.
Your pump is slow.
If I press on full,
fuel vapours leak out from the tank
but you pay for them anyway.
It takes motivation.
It's all money saved.
It pays for the class photo
at the year's end.
I'll see you tomorrow morning?
Just between you and me,
don't you find the coaching
and badges a bit dumb?
Denis...
In the real world,
you know, outside your house,
there are rules.
The girls will come up against them
and it's your duty to prepare them, see?
Know what I think of the real world?
It makes me sick.
Mums and guinea pigs
die without any warning.
I won't prepare them for that.
I'm happy to make them think
that fireflies
will soon illuminate the world,
or that the streets are full
of cute bunnies
that do candy droppings.
A little nonchalance goes a long way!
You and I form a team, like it or not.
Your hearing must be perfect.
You're in hot water.
...Say allowance.
#For the tax department, say tax.
Tax...
#If you have a partner, say partner.
If you're single, say single.
I'm not really single.
I don't understand.
The Yule logs...
That one has a unicorn!
Main menu.
Shit...
I'm the manager.
Fancy a glass of champagne?
Sure, I'd love one.
Think this is a buffet?
Ah, that...
- We prefer to try before we invest...
- Want to try?
No, follow me please.
Leave the children with someone.
Can't they wait here?
Girls this age
don't stay alone in my store.
Get a friend to watch them
or it's the police.
Cool! It's ages since I saw Patrick!
#Hi, the answering machine is broken.
This is the toaster.
#Speak slowly,
I never took a message before. Bye.
Nothing.
Hi, this is Sweet Pussy.
I'm closed for Christmas, silly.
#But Mother Christmas is here
to swap gifts.
Not every number...
Hold on a second, it's Christmas.
Just a second.
And Auntie Sverine?
She'll come to watch us.
Are you nuts. She's the last one
I'd call. To say what?
Want the police to call her?
Keep your friends close
and your enemies even closer.
The cinnamon sak is free?
Ok, I'll take that.
How long to deliver?
Yes, Merry Christmas.
Goodbye.
Why the hell am I here?
Your dad's got a nerve!
"It's urgent, we're a team..."
A team now!
Were you with your family?
Yes, of course.
What was so urgent?
- What's wrong?
- I need to pee!
What?
I'll take you home, girls.
No, now we're here, let's go bowling.
No, if anything happens,
Im responsible.
C'mon, please, I want to bowl too.
Taking an interest in sport is great,
but you need to get home and rest.
Why?
Rest allows the body to recuperate.
What does "recuperate" mean?
It'll be tough if you don't give in.
Hold on, let me talk to your sister, ok?
So, "recuperate" means
you recover your strength.
Now let's end these sterile negotiations.
Do I get a present if I stop negotiating?
Rest is a present you give to yourself.
Theory and practice differ.
Let me finish.
When you rest, your brain...
Your brain rests at the same time
along with your neurones.
What are neurones?
Go, Sverine!
That was fantastic!
What are you doing?
Hold on, Sverine...
Sverine, you just did a strike!
A strike!
You have to celebrate with at least
a "Guys, I rock!"
That's the minimum.
Let's hear you say it!
I rock!
That totally sucks!
Even I didn't hear it.
Watch this...
I rock! I aced that fucking ball!
Who cares?
Come on.
You'll see, it's liberating.
Ok... I rock!
No, louder!
I rock!
Let yourself go!
- I rock!
- Again!
I rock!
- Fantastic!
- She rocks, she rocks!
Go for it, Wednesday!
Janine! Janine!
Go, Janine!
Good one, Wednesday!
Stop that!
Yeah! I rock!
You've worn me out.
I'll get you home.
I wore myself out.
Big surprise.
Can I ask you something?
Why did you choose this job?
You're very curious...
When I was your age,
my dad went out for cigarettes
and when he finally came back, I was 25.
That wouldn't have happened with vaping.
- So subtle...
- What?
That day, I decided it was my duty
to help children.
My turn now.
Why do you call him Denis and not Dad?
When you say Dad, you want to say Mum too.
Will they split us up?
Not if you all keep trying so hard.
Thanks a million for looking after them.
I'll take over now
There were preparing a surprise
and asked me to stay.
I couldn't refuse at Christmas.
They insisted.
They went like this...
I couldn't resist...
I taught them to do that.
We can't go up then?
No, it's a surprise.
Ok...
Mum, don't let us down.
Over and out.
Show time!
You knew they were preparing...
No, I don't know anything about it.
The suspense is complete.
I'm nervous
because I don't know what'll happen.
- Here we go.
- Hello.
Who's that?
That's a child...
It's Christmas. You're not at home?
Yes, but my mum's on duty
and won't be back before 11 pm.
Should I go or...
You can stay for once.
Even if we're not totally ready,
#here's a sneak preview
of the Fabulous Patars' Little Circus!
Bravo!
What's that?
Fireflies?
Yes, fireflies...
Janine raises them.
We'll use them for light soon.
I'm deadly serious.
- Beautiful, huh?
- Magnificent.
Less beautiful when they die.
Much less.
It's really tough. They lived what...
The duration of a show.
But the show must go on...
Now,
welcome a terrifying monster...
Cornelia!
You have a goat?
Yes.
Meet Cornelia, part goat, part lion.
Look at her fabulous black and white coat
from the Patar winter collection!
Bravo, Cornelia!
Thank you.
Let's hear it for Cornelia!
Don't worry, we're on top of it.
It's ok, if you want I can...
- I can belch the alphabet.
- Ok.
Ladies and gentlemen, tonight
you'll see a unique wrestling bout!
Let's hear it for Wednesday Jawbreaker...
Versus Gigi the Weirdo!
Here we go!
You think you're smart. I'll waste you.
I'll eat your guts!
I'll strangle you with your own innards!
I'll rip out the heart you don't have!
I don't have a heart?
Go on, waste her!
Bitch!
I'll waste you, slut!
Screw the umpire!
- You surrender?
- Never!
Ok, I surrender.
That's it.
Now, before your astounded gaze,
I shall...
Cut Wednesday in half!
That's a real saw!
I found a way to make it work on the Net.
Where's this from?
We swapped it for an old guitar we found.
An old...
My Fender?
My Fender?
Ok, we're not ready yet
but we will be for the judge.
Who do you mean, "we'?
I told you to stay out of it.
Girls, you don't see the judge.
That's not normal.
Why not?
The show proves were together.
That's the problem.
You and your sister won't be able
to open life's closed doors
because you don't have the keys.
We'll use the windows.
What were you thinking?
With this crazy stuff,
you're heading for a foster family!
Sverine's right, you're a useless father!
Take that!
Janine...
It's sick what you're doing to us.
We've been preparing this for months.
And you spoil everything!
We thought you'd be pleased.
We were scared.
I hate you!
Thanks.
You're welcome. Bye.
120 euros?
Not much for such a spot.
We can always take it down again.
No, it's ok.
It's better than nothing.
Sign here, please.
Now this...
ADVERTISING SPACE FOR RENMato, tell me what the score is.
22 for Harmonie,
two for Janine.
Bravo!
Harmonie will do the recorder solo
at the end-of-year concert.
Recorders are totally has-been.
Can't we do something else?
But it's the world's
most beautiful instrument!
I'm fighting to have it
reinstated in the school programme.
You have no choice.
Go on, girls.
Thank you, Mato.
That's enough!
Piece of shit, dumb bitch, slut...
She'll hear.
It's not for you.
My mouth takes over from my mind.
Calm down.
- She's talking to herself?
- She's mad.
Watch this.
Janine...
Foul demon, leave this body!
That's a mean thing to do.
That's so cute!
He defends her.
May I go out?
It's over in five minutes.
This is a song from 1866.
- Imagine their kids.
- What a nightmare!
Calm down.
Cool... Zen...
Shit...
Are you crazy?
Madam, do something!
What's going on?
She broke my nose!
You broke her nose with...
You're out of your mind!
Get to the principal's office!
I'm sick of her! My God...
- Let me see.
- Leave me alone!
I was about to get a badge
when the school called!
I had to make up
some crazy excuse to leave.
Imagine what'll happen
if Grellot finds out!
I'm sorry, Denis.
I didn't mean to do it.
I feel really weird lately.
Listen...
I understand how you feel
and that's the way you feel
when you grow up.
You're like a little square
on a Rubik's cube
looking for its place.
It's not easy but...
If you keep at it, you'll find it.
Understand?
No.
Forget it.
From now on, we simplify things.
I'll write you a note
so you can skip your music class.
But I dream of doing the show too!
Screw your dreams,
screw your teenage problems!
We keep a low profile
until my course is over.
Is it a teen meltdown
or not? I don't get it anymore.
No, it's not a meltdown.
Change tack and see a neurologist.
A neurologist?
A neurologist
will approach it differently.
He'll find a solution, see.
Right, Janine?
It'll be ok.
I swear, Roby, we're all going crazy here.
Especially me.
I can't control myself.
When I type in the weird stuff you do,
I get the same result...
Tourette's syndrome.
#The connections in the brain
governing self-control
Are deregulated in Tourette's sufferers.
#It's a struggle with myself
to bring my tics under control.
It wears me out.
#If there are people around,
they give me strange looks.
I sit on my hands.
#I see them thinking,
"Who's that weirdo?"
I snapped my fingers non-stop.
#We saw a doctor
who diagnosed the syndrome.
I shout insults without meaning to.
People think I do it to show off.
The others think I'm a bit crazy.
#It's like being in a bubble
on a tiny cloud.
#I feel like I'm locked
in something that I can't control.
It's normal you didn't notice.
It worsens during adolescence.
The pressure to be like others
increases then too.
- So I'm not mad?
- Not at all.
It must be something else.
She has hardly any tics.
I control them.
Then they return like a boomerang,
even stronger than before?
Do you fit in at school?
There's Robert...
You have other friends, don't you?
Let's say it's that.
How is it treated?
Well, for now,
we can't treat this syndrome.
But, luckily, you can learn
to manage your excess energy.
You need behavioural therapy.
How fast does it work?
Like a marathon, it's long.
Isn't there anything quicker?
I'll prescribe neuroleptics.
No neuroleptics.
No way.
She'll control herself
and get back to normal.
That won't happen!
I'm sick of having tics, of being weird,
of not being like others.
I'm sick of being me, see.
I'm sick of being me.
It's a temporary measure.
There are side effects, true.
At first, you may find Janine...
What makes a good parent?
What are your educational principles?
What is your family spirit?
Well...
We're very close.
What do they mean
by educational principles?
Liberty, maybe.
I apolo...
"Because of rheumatism in her fingers,
Janine Patar cannot play the recorder
for a while."
Apologize to your classmate
and then go to the study room.
Forgive me, Harmonie.
It won't happen again.
Stop that!
I'm very happy with the test results.
You're all making really great progress.
Denis,
your analysis
of the career and family life tandem
is excellent.
Thank you.
Gigi!
You took your time.
That was a great show.
Why didn't Gigi come?
She didn't come
because the pills tire her out.
I want my mum.
Wednesday...
Wednesday...
Wait for me.
I didn't know
specialists cost a bomb.
So I'm ready to come back to work.
Sorry, I had no choice.
That's ok, it doesn't matter.
Don't worry about it.
Did I mention my bathroom?
I need to redecorate.
I'd pay you to help me.
That's kind, but I'll manage.
Thanks, Pierrot.
Bye, Denis.
You're pretending.
I can tell.
I'm here. Go to your bed now.
Janine!
Come on!
Wake up!
Are you ok?
What did you do?
- What did you do?
- Sorry.
I'm ok.
You gave me a fright.
The Fabulous Patars' Little Circus
Patary is more like a circus.
Parental course hearing
Goodbye, Patricia.
Isn't Denis here?
He hasn't come.
Jean-Benot, let's go.
"She wouldn't have bothered us,
the werewolves aren't..."
Surprise!
Look who I found looking unhappy
in the garden.
Look what I have.
- Honey Loops.
- Real ones?
Of course they're real ones.
We won the lottery?
No, I went wild with the credit card.
Totally wild.
Just for you, beauty.
- What is it?
- I need my pill.
Hold on, I wanted...
I wanted to tell you something important.
Your show was fantastic, really fantastic.
Full of our family spirit.
Ok?
So good...
- Finally...
- Yeah.
You forgot your hearing, Mr Patar?
How about a hello?
Come on, let's go.
Hold on, you have some glitter here.
There.
You're perfect now. Let's go.
I forgot to tell you something.
We won't be going.
Why not?
My spontaneity is gone.
I don't recognize myself.
And you fooled me completely
with your badge idea.
I do what I can
with the tools they give me.
I won't do any more odd jobs
with your tools.
All right.
So what'll you do?
What'll I do?
I'm going to hire a lawyer.
And take out a 100-year loan to pay him.
You're being a teen.
- A teen?
- Yes.
You realize that despite all your skills,
neither you nor I
noticed how Janine was suffering?
So my priority now is my daughter.
You've got a nerve blaming me!
Goodbye.
There we go.
Good riddance.
You like her.
Are you kidding?
Now that she's gone,
I can go to wrestling again.
I'll sign you up for judo.
She wasn't entirely wrong.
You can go in your mask.
We'll manage without your pills.
If Robert agrees.
So that's that.
There.
Will it start again?
No, I have a different idea.
Ill have a basic burger
and a chicky burger too.
- We got a crunchy chicken?
- Yes.
Three of them.
That's 21.90 euros, please.
- No!
- What?
I'm going to pay.
Where's all that from?
You sold some of my stuff?
Did I tell you Kevins mum
thinks you're really cute?
You sold my stuff.
Here
My Walkman? My rollerblades?
No.
Watch!
You've made a real mess!
Your attention, please.
Wednesday, I wanted to say
I'm sorry for missing your dance show
and for the scare with the pills.
Anyhow, to make up for it,
I got you a present.
That's kind.
- I made them.
- Great!
- You like them?
- They're mega beautiful!
Let me see.
- You like them?
- Thank you!
- You made them?
- How long did it take?
- You're clever.
- I love them.
- I have presents too.
- Yeah?
This is for you.
Why's the lady in her panties?
Not panties, a swimsuit.
That's so cute! Bunny ears!
You can wear them to school.
Do they suit me?
You look fantastic.
And this is for you.
For me?
She's really weird.
A Rubik's cube.
That's so sweet. Thanks.
You remember?
Cut it out!
She's not some circus freak!
Just give us a break!
Stop yelling. Are you nuts or what?
It's normal for them to stare.
No, it isn't.
Imagine you were sitting near someone
with loads of tics,
you'd look too.
What would you say?
Here's what I'd say:
That's how the Patars are!
Stop that, it's not funny.
It's been hell for me without the pills.
- Be strong.
- You don't get it!
It's like a thing that really annoys you,
but that you can't fight against.
You try, but you can't.
Yes, I understand...
Here's my problem.
Listen, I have an idea.
"The undersigned,
Gigi and Denis Patar,
agree on the following:
Denis must...
Must..."
Resist dessert!
"...Resist dessert."
I didn't expect that.
Frequent girls over 14.
That won't be easy.
And stop smoking for good.
And vaping counts too.
That's tough.
"Gigi Patar must resist
making noise with...
With every object
that she finds
and control her tics in public."
All right?
What about me?
Why? Are you a smoker?
You have bulimia or Tourette's?
Well then?
We need something like Sverines badges
when we succeed, as a reward.
This.
- A spoon?
- It's good and dumb.
A spoon for each task completed.
No, I have better!
- Samurai sauce?
- Yes.
Ok.
All right!
Good idea.
- I'll respect the contract.
- Me too!
With my blood.
A blood pact!
Go on, Denis.
How about that...
- Why's that there?
- Vaporizer!
Farewell.
One spoon for you!
Thank you.
Ready, Janine?
Ready, Denis?
Go!
It's all motor skills.
Right hand, rub, left hand, polish.
Faster.
Fucking sponge!
Yeah...
Don't worry about cursing.
I saw on the Net it's called coprolalia.
You curse against your will.
When you say, "for fuck's sake",
that's your copro-thing?
Right now, I want to say fuck.
Cheat!!
I win! I win!
I win!
Spoon!
Cheese!
We'll try more effective therapy.
Cornelia!
Caprinotherapy.
It was tough getting the neurologist
to prescribe it.
My wife died three years ago
and I still pay tax on her salary.
I don't have the death certificate.
- Did you send it?
- Of course.
Sorry, but I'll need to start
the whole file over again.
You'll need to be patient.
Honey, not here, not now.
Is she ok?
Bitch!
Don't worry, it'll soon pass...
Not now.
Shall I call someone?
No, it won't help.
It's Tourette's.
Poor kid...
Listen, I'll see what I can do.
Given the situation...
That's kind of you.
It's sorted out.
You'll received the refund
in a week or so.
- Good luck.
- You know, it's not easy.
That was one wicked Tourettes fit!
Even better than at Family Allowance.
This thing is wild.
I had the idea of the pee squeezer
for the allowance calculation.
All right!
We're on a roll, let's do Pierrot!
A crazy thing happened last night.
"They" wrecked the automatic tills.
How did "they" do it?
"They" spread a sort of sticky liquid,
an aphrodisiac massage oil, all over them.
Devilish, but clever.
All the tills are out of order
so the store needs...
An old-style cashier.
Trouble is,
I've found a better-paid job.
What if I give you a raise
and add luncheon vouchers?
Health care?
Category B, but that's the best I can do.
Forget it.
Cheapskate!
Ok, you win.
Parental course assessment
Approved / Rejected
No God, no Mathematics Teacher
- Don't go out!
- Let go!
- Stay here!
- Let go!
Let go of me now!
Stay!
Stop it!
Hi, Sverine.
They do this each time
I want to buy cigarettes.
It's a drag.
A problem?
I hesitated about coming,
but I thought we ought to talk.
Yeah, sure.
I've been thinking about your decision
not to attend the hearing.
It's never happened before,
but I have to admit it's brave of you.
I didn't think that way.
I know.
I'd love to do things by instinct,
ignoring the consequences.
I always have to weigh the pros and cons.
The heart versus reason.
Or reason versus feelings.
"The heart has its reasons
of which reason knows nothing."
Blaise Pascal.
And...
"The bed's reasons are always better."
That one was Coluche.
It's funny, huh?
I can't get a handle on you.
But that's not unpleasant.
That there...
That's non-verbal communication
when you do that
with your hair.
Yes, exactly.
My classes aren't that useless.
No, they leave a mark.
They sink in?
Bravo, Denis,
and thanks for your help, Sverine.
- You aced it.
- Yeah!
Spoon!
What did he ace?
The spoons replace your badges
for an ordeal.
Exactly.
So what was the ordeal?
He had to talk to a girl aged...
Over 14.
What do you...
I get it. So I'm an ordeal?
Not at all.
That's good.
I didn't know.
Ill get back to work.
I just wanted to tell you that.
Bye, girls.
See you!
- Hold on..
- Bye.
I was being sincere!
What are you playing at?
- Screw the spoons.
- No way!
We were chatting.
You're always in my hair
and I need to be able to breathe a bit.
- Screw your spoon.
- Keep it, you earned it.
I don't want it!
We screwed up with Sverine.
We sucked big time.
How's the list coming along?
I tidy my desk every night,
I manage my laces nearly every time
and I control my tics better.
You're a great fighter.
Better than I am.
No, I can't go in there.
You go. I'll wait here.
I'm going.
If you can't face reality,
you'll keep lying to us
and we'll never move on.
For instance...
What'll you do when we both leave home?
I don't know. I'll get bored.
We don't want that,
so we'll stay with you and ruin our lives.
You have to accept it now.
It's like Ziggy.
We know you replace him each time he dies.
That's ridiculous.
He's never the same colour!
Everyone knows
guinea pigs change colour when they moult.
Yeah, sure.
To Ziggy.
When I met you,
the way you moved your little snout
won me over instantly.
You were the smartest rodent
that I ever got to meet.
You were against everything
and I was
right there against you.
I loved the way you involved me
in the fight
against GMOs in sunflower seeds,
for freedom for Tibetan gerbils,
and above all against
the jackals in power.
Fortunately,
your daughters...
Your friends, more like...
Have inherited
your uncommon energy.
You'd tell me,
in the language...
Of guinea pigs, of course...
That another world was possible.
Thank you for letting me live on Mars.
Over and out.
Over and out.
Are you ok?
You scared me.
I'll help with the bathroom.
Thanks, that's great.
But it wasn't that urgent.
I was thinking...
A brownish grey colour.
Isn't brownish grey a bit gloomy?
I was thinking more of a sunflower colour...
Denis...
Come here.
Patar... The father didn't attend
the end-of-course hearing.
Our moral contract with him
was not respected.
For me, he's irresponsible.
Hold on, he didn't take
primary school kids hostage.
No, but the childrens conditions
are far from favourable
and Mr Patar won't face reality.
On reading your report,
he isn't an ideal father.
Hold on, do you know any ideal parents?
- No, but that's not the issue.
- It is.
Look at you.
Your dad has a great job,
your mum stopped work to raise you,
so you have no problems?
That's not exactly true.
Even well-balanced parents aren't perfect.
And you, Franky.
Jewish dad, Muslim mum.
How's the Gaza Strip?
Fine, what's the problem?
He fits none of the criteria,
proving there's no ideal.
This father...
Ok, it's true, his place isn't exactly
neat and tidy.
I don't get it.
He won't face reality.
We've said that already.
What's the problem?
The girls lost their mother.
They can't lose their father!
We worked from your report.
I've looked deeper into it since.
Were here about the children.
- Precisely.
- Objectively.
- I am being objective.
- You're not.
I've had new information since,
notably his daughter's illness.
It's important.
That's not our problem.
What matters
is how we protect the children.
You're siding a little too much
with Mr Patar.
He didn't respect the contract.
I'm bringing in a judge.
Give them one last chance.
See them together.
I won't back down
unless you come up with new info.
But Im bringing in a judge, sorry.
Next case.
Alexis Talls.
Listen to me.
A quick note...
Well, a little tape...
#to apologize about the spoon incident
the other day.
#Even if I know you'll do your best,
the girls and I have a back-up plan.
#We'll go and hole up in the country,
we haven't decided where yet.
Like Bonnie and Clyde on the run.
#Without guns, just with a goat
and a thermos of hot chocolate.
By the way, we ate zucchini yesterday.
#They weren't that delicious,
but they were edible.
And you're not an ordeal,
Sverine Grellot.
All right then...
Bye.
Over and out.
Let's hear it for class 6B.
Thank you!
Give them a big hand!
Carry on.
You've come for the show!
I'd really like to take part.
Sorry, you haven't rehearsed.
- I know it by heart.
- Not well enough.
You can't stand between a child
and her dream.
I'm sorry.
I beseech you!
Mr Patar!
Violaine, please!
It's not fair on those
who've worked so hard.
I can't, it'll endanger their work. No!
Welcome Mrs Cramelle's class,
4C, that will play "Le temps des cerises".
It doesn't matter.
Besides,
I'd have screwed up in public
and let you down.
No.
I want to make one thing clear.
Whatever you do, you'll never let me down.
Thanks, Dad.
Dad?
Hi, Didi.
Everything ok?
Where's the family?
You don't know?
I'm just over there, ok?
It'll be less fun without you.
You'll blow them away.
A beautiful love song
from the Paris Commune.
When we sing
Of cherry time
The joyful nightingale
And the mocking blackbird
Will all make merry together...
Let's find your sister.
- I don't want to see the show.
- Why not?
- I don't.
- We can't stay here.
We'd have had a laugh.
Right?
No.
Know what?
- We'll do something together.
- Ok.
Patar-style.
All right.
Mind if they throw us out?
No.
Listen carefully...
Join us!
I need to talk to you!
I saw what you did before.
Look at me. Calm...
Cool... Zen.
Calm...
Cool...
Zen.
You, do this!
You do this...
And you do this.
Go on.
Sverine!
Come on, don't be so useless.
I am a bit useless.
Hold on...
Come on, join in.
That's it!
Yes, Mato, come on!
Come on, Capucine!
Patar Power!
Yes!
Come on, Sverine!
More noise with the movements!
Can't hear you!
Gigi, you're wild!
She's my daughter!
The Patars rule!
Someone fought hard for you.
I'm going.
Goodbye.
I tested a new concept:
the open-air hearing.
That was my boss.
- He was the...
- Yes.
It was almost a disaster...
It was close.
We felt the heat.
So...
Would you like to have a drink?
I think I'll regret it,
but we're not quite ready.
Not even a bit ready?
She's still kind of present.
Give her time to pack.
You're right.
I'll be going.
I have other families to help.
You're Mary Poppins.
You mend families and then vanish.
But...
Why don't you stay for once?
Maybe you didn't notice,
but Mary Poppins fears commitment.
So she has a shit life.
Yeah.
I'll check the chimney just in case.
- You never know.
- Ok.
The chimney is for Santa...
Right, I mix them up.
Well...
Goodbye then.
Supercalifragi...
Supercalifragilistic...
Superfrati...
You know it.
Expialidocious.
Expialidocious.
See you.
- So, are we going?
- Yes.
Zen.
- Where's Didi?
- No idea.
- You're crazy!
- Don't mock my sister!
Get lost, germ!
- Are you ready?
- Yes!
Let's go.
Here we go!
Robert!
Wait for me!
- Come on, run!
- Faster!
Faster, Dad!
Unicorn Power!
- What subject?
- French.
- I'll give you five, ok?
- Yeah.
- Thanks. Goodbye.
- Next.
Swimming class. I hate swimsuits.
Head lice
- Five euros, please.
- Thanks.
Next.
- Hello.
- What subject?
Monday's maths test.
I'll give you ten big ones
so you'll be suspended.
Scratch yourself a lot
so the teachers take it seriously.
Five euros, please.
Thank you.
Sorry, sold out!
Over and out.