The Hero (2017) Movie Script

LEE: Lonestar Barbecue Sauce,
the perfect partner for your chicken.
Can you just run it a few more times, Lee?
Lonestar Barbecue Sauce,
the perfect partner for your chicken.
Lonestar Barbecue Sauce,
the perfect partner for your chicken.
Lonestar Barbecue Sauce,
the perfect partner for your chicken.
You got it?
MAN ON INTERCOM: Can you do one more?
You want something different?
MAN ON INTERCOM: Just do one more.
Lonestar Barbecue Sauce,
the perfect partner for your chicken.
MAN ON INTERCOM: And do one more?
Lonestar Barbecue Sauce...
Hey, Peter.
PETER: Hey, Lee, how are you?
What's up?
Have you ever heard of a group called
The Western Appreciation
and Preservation Guild?
Well, I just got a call from them,
they want to give you
a Lifetime Achievement Award.
Lifetime, huh?
Is there anything else?
I don't know, there's some
sort of award ceremony.
I figured that. I mean,
is there anything else? Like...
Uh, I don't know. A job offer? A script?
Not at the moment.
But we're expecting some things soon, Lee.
DOCTOR: Lee. Sorry to keep you waiting.
It's fine.
I know we were all hoping to get
good news about this biopsy.
But... I'm afraid I don't have good news.
Shit. You trying to give me a heart attack?
I'm trying to get you to open
the god damn door.
That was a cop-knock.
You know, like you're a cop knocking.
That's how cops knock.
You wanna smoke some joints?
Are you okay?
You seem a little...
The thing is...
I got some news.
What news?
Baby, baby, why, oh, why
Why did you leave me
For another guy...
I wanna make a movie.
- Oh, yeah?
- Mm-hm.
I had this dream last night...
Mm... stop right there.
Do you like hearing
about other people's dreams?
I don't know.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Because for me hearing about
other people's dreams is...
You telling me you don't
wanna hear about my dream?
Fuck you.
It just doesn't interest me, man.
Think about it, I mean, it's your dream.
What about movies?
Do they interest you?
Yeah. I love movies.
Movies are other people's dreams.
You got an ounce of this shit, or what?
I need it.
An ounce?
One ounce of the devil's lettuce.
That's gonna clean me out, man.
I don't why you just can't go to the store
like everybody else.
I like coming here.
You are a creature of habit,
if ever there was one.
It's called Platinum Cookies.
It's a blend, it's real good shit.
(CHUCKLES) Platinum Cookies.
Platinum Cookies, the real good shit.
Say that, just... just that.
Platinum Cookies.
The real good shit.
(LAUGHS) Oh, my God.
That voice could sell
a shit ton of weed, my friend.
What's this?
Break in case of emergency.
You ain't gonna hear it
No more fussin' and fightin'
Let me hold you tight
Bygones are bygones
Don't think about tomorrow
For the future's bright
You admit you were wrong
You were just a fool
Too blind to see
I was the only girl for you
And now you've seen the light
Who's that?
JEREMY: Oh, hey.
Charlotte, come on in.
- Hey, man.
- Hey.
CHARLOTTE: God, it... place smells
like fish sells in here.
Yeah, we're just finishing
a little afternoon snack.
Lee, Charlotte. Charlotte, Lee.
I'll be right back. Don't worry, he's cool.
You admit you were wrong
You were just a fool
Too blind to see
I was the only girl for you
And now you've Seen the light
Everything's gonna be all right
So hold me tight...
You're staring at me.
I didn't say I had a problem with it,
I was just simply pointing it out.
I like trying to figure people out.
I think you can figure out a lot
about a person by just looking at them.
So, what'd you figure out about me?
Not a thing.
How do I know you?
I know you from something.
If you say so.
Are you an actor?
All the actors I know are
self-centered and insane.
Sounds about right.
You're staring at me now?
Seeing if I can... figure you out.
Can you?
You seem sad.
JEREMY: There you go.
It's all here, but... count it.
JEREMY: Don't drink too much with these.
Jesus! Get some sun, man.
Nice to meet you, um...
Sorry, I forgot your name.
- Lee.
- Right. Lee.
They say that memory
is the second thing to go.
And what's the first?
I can't remember.
How do you two know each other?
We were on a TV show together.
Nothing you've ever heard of.
JEREMY: It's called Cattle Drive.
It ran for 13 episodes.
Lee was the lead.
Ben Horn, a gun slinger.
I was a cocky kid who stole
the wrong man's horse.
- You mean you had a real job once?
- Yeah.
Had a wife too. So did he.
Now, we just have each other.
Nice to meet you, Lee.
WOMAN: This one, and this one.
What a nice surprise.
A nice surprise?
Good to see you, Val.
Sure it is.
You getting ready for another show?
Yes, at the end of the month.
Have you seen Lucy recently?
Yes, she came over for dinner,
we watched some TV on Sunday.
What'd you watch?
You wanna know what we watched on television?
I haven't seen Lucy in a long time.
Call her.
She doesn't want me to call her.
Don't do that.
I don't blame her.
You should call her.
I've got something I wanna tell you.
I'm gonna make a movie.
CHELSEA: Peter Cohen's office.
Hey, Chelsea, it's Lee, for Peter.
- Hi, Lee, let me see if I have him.
- Thanks.
PETER: Lee, what's up?
When did you say that thing was again?
- The Western award?
- Yeah.
You look good out there.
Remember when we used to play?
What are you doing here?
I mean, how did you know I was here?
Your mother told me.
I was in the neighborhood, and I just...
How's work going?
Still waiting tables at that steakhouse?
I liked that place.
I work for Google.
Yeah, I sell advertising space for them.
What's up?
I guess it's been a while, huh?
You look the same though.
That's good, I guess.
I was thinking, uh...
I'm getting this lifetime
achievement award thing, and uh...
it's no big deal but,
I was thinking maybe you'd like
to go with me to the ceremony.
When is it?
This Sunday?
I'm going to Palm Springs
with Jake. I can't cancel.
How about dinner when you get back?
My treat. You pick the place, time, whatever.
I'm free Tuesday.
Yeah. Yeah, that'll be great.
I got to get back.
I'll see ya. Tuesday.
I'm gonna have some fun
On the beach where there's a party
On the beach Where there's a party...
WOMAN: Hello, Mr. Hayden?
It's Nina calling from Cedars-Sinai.
Dr. Friedburg would like to schedule
your first oncology appointment.
Are you available tomorrow morning at 11:00?
Tomorrow morning?
Dr. Friedburg would
like to discuss your treatment plan
with you as soon as possible.
Is there another time
that might be better for you?
I'm actually in the middle
of something right now, could...
- Can I call you back?
- Yeah, that's fine.
Best tacos in L.A., right?
You live around here?
Stalking you. (LAUGHS)
Charlotte, right?
Got a good memory for an old pot-head.
A sad old pot-head.
Why did you say that anyway?
Um, because you're old
and you smoke a lot of weed.
I mean, the part about me being sad.
I don't know.
Are you?
Nothing wrong with that.
Are you married?
Divorced. Have been for a long time.
So are you gonna ask for my number?
You want me to?
What? You got a thing for
sad old guys or something?
Just old guys.
You doing anything on Sunday night?
To achieving things in a lifetime.
You keep on moving in and out, girl
You keep on moving
What's that?
CHARLOTTE: Fairy powder.
It's something that will make you feel great.
I'm feeling pretty good right now.
Oh, yeah?
You keep on moving...
It won't kill you, I promise.
But no peer pressure.
Give me that stuff.
LEE: You really like burning
the candle at both ends, don't you?
It seems like you do too.
You know who came up with that?
"Burning the candle at both ends"?
Who's that?
Edna St. Vincent Millay.
"My candle burns at both ends,
it will not last the night,
"But, ah, my foes, and oh, my friends,
It gives a lovely light!"
Isn't it great?
It's called First Fig.
I'm thinking.
What are you thinking?
That if you were maybe
20 years older, I'd probably kiss you.
I got to wait 20 years?
You'll be dead in 20 years.
Don't remind me.
So, you're ready for tonight?
Not really.
Are you gonna give a speech?
They'll be expecting that.
Just talk about all your
lifetime achievements.
I did one film that I'm proud of.
That was 40 years ago.
Since then, I've stayed busy,
but I wouldn't say I've been...
It's kinda weird being
remembered for one part for so many years.
But it's about as close to immortality
as any person can get.
You haven't even seen it.
I don't need to see it.
I've got you right here.
Got the man himself.
The Hero.
If you love somebody enough
You'll follow wherever they go
So, when is this
fairy powder going to kick in?
Pretty soon.
And then this is going to seem like
the greatest party of all time.
LEE: It better.
MAN: Mr. Hayden.
- Please, call me Lee.
- Gary.
Gary Babcock, I'm the...
the president of the...
the Western Appreciation
and Preservation Guild.
We're... we're so honored to have you here.
I'm honored to be here, Gary.
- This is...
- Hi, I'm Cathy Lee.
Cathy Lee.
- Funny.
- CHARLOTTE: Isn't it?
When I met him I thought,
(MUFFLED) this must be meant to be.
This is such a cool event,
such a... diverse crowd.
Uh, yeah. Sure.
Well, would you mind stepping over?
We'd like to get a few pictures.
- You too, Cathy Lee.
- You bet.
- Oh.
- Woah. Pardon me, darlin'.
No, I'm...
I mean, you can bump
into me anytime you want, Mr. Hayden.
Well, there you go. (LAUGHS)
I'm Betsy.
How do you do, Betsy?
I'm such a huge fan.
Well, thank you.
Would you mind signing something for me?
- I'll be happy to.
- Really appreciate it.
BETSY: Here.
To Betsy.
My bumpin' buddy.
I love that.
Thank you.
- Here you go, Betsy.
- Thank you so much.
- You're so welcome.
- And I just love your mustache.
It loves you too.
GARY: Mr. Hayden.
Would you mind stepping over here?
Yep, I feel it too.
Getting any
Getting any
Getting any
Getting any
Getting any
No, you ain't getting any
Well now, the man I'm about to introduce
needs no introduction.
You all know this year's recipient.
His... his unmistakable voice,
his iconic mustache,
made him one of most popular
actors in the 1970s and 80s.
His turn as "The Hero"
in the film by the same name is... is
widely considered one of the...
one of the greatest western
performances of all time.
Let's take a look.
The one, the only, Lee Hayden.
MAN (MOVIE): Hold it right there, friend.
We been lookin' for you.
LEE (MOVIE): Is that right?
Ladies and gentlemen, the Western Icon
Lifetime Achievement Award recipient
for this year, Mr. Lee Hayden.
Thank you.
LEE: Wow.
I don't know what to say.
Awards are a strange thing.
I mean, what does it say about you?
Before I came here tonight, I looked up
"achievement" in the dictionary.
It's not a difficult word.
We all know what it means.
But I looked it up anyway.
Looked it up on my phone.
And it said, "the result of hard work."
Well, I certainly have worked hard.
But the thing is...
I know there are a lot
of others out there who
are more deserving than I am of this award.
And so, I'm not sure why I'm
standing up here right now.
Not sure I deserve this.
Any of this.
MAN: We love you, Lee.
I love you too.
I do. I feel that love.
I'm nothing without all of you.
Just a grain of sand.
And that's the thing,
we're all just grains of sand.
We're just people.
People working hard and
trying to do our best.
Aren't we?
- Yeah.
- Yes.
I'm no better than you
and you're no better than me.
Everyone in this room
is as deserving as I am of this award.
Like you, Miss.
Yes, ma'am, you.
Come here. It's okay, come on up.
Come on up. (APPLAUSE)
What's your name, darlin'?
Wow, this jacket you've got on sure is...
Tell you what, Diane,
you are my...
Western Icon Lifetime
Achievement award winner.
Here you go. Diane, everybody.
Diane is my hero.
Let's hear it for Diane.
She is a fucking icon.
(CHANTING) Diane! Diane!
Diane! Diane! Diane! Diane!
MAN: Hold it right there, friend.
We've been looking for you.
- That right?
- Not just us.
Got to be at least
eight bounties on your head.
We intend to collect on all of 'em.
Do you think you can keep
running like this forever?
You can't outrun destiny, amigo.
And they call you "The Hero."
But we know who you really are.
DIRECTOR ON RADIO: And that's a cut.
Everybody take five.
Thanks, Lee.
Hey, Dad.
How was the procedure?
You know what I always said?
I'm not going anywhere.
Morning. Coffee?
Did we, uh...
Molly usually isn't good
for that sort of thing.
We did other stuff though.
Other stuff?
Yeah, we went out. After the ceremony.
We went out?
To a few bars, and a club.
You, um... danced. A lot.
How old are you?
How old are you?
Why do you wanna know how old I am?
Because this seems a little odd.
- Does it?
- Yeah.
I mean you look like you could be my
daughter's age for Christ's sake.
Jesus. Don't make it weird.
It is a little weird.
How old's your daughter?
Thirty four.
Cool, well... I'm older than her.
LEE: Still.
Look, I'm just a little...
confused right now.
I don't understand why you're here.
You asked me out, right?
So, what the fuck, man.
I'm not busting your balls
because you're older than my dad.
But whatever.
If you've got a problem with it, I'll go.
No, I don't want you to go.
Okay so, what do you want?
I don't know.
Don't think so hard about it, man.
You're thinking about it instead of just...
Can I have some milk in my coffee?
I'm sorry.
I'm here because I wanna be here.
Trust me, I got plenty of places I could be.
But I'm here with you.
But if you don't want me here, I can go.
After I drink my coffee.
'Cause this coffee's pretty good.
That's Folgers.
I don't want you to go.
Can't find my phone.
You got to call somebody?
I like to check in once in a while.
CHARLOTTE: Lee, oh, my God!
You're trending on Twitter.
Your speech last night...
I got a text from Jeremy.
Oh, my God, it went viral, dude.
TMZ, Entertainment Weekly,
Jezebel... Holy shit! You went viral, dude.
What're you talking about?
Your speech. When you
brought that lady up on stage...
Okay, yeah.
People are going nuts over it.
Oh, my God!
Diane! They interviewed Diane!
Man, we really got to find your phone.
I'm not sure I want to know.
Let's forget about the phone.
You have a job to go to or what?
What do you do anyway?
So you wanna like...
get to know me or something?
Yeah, I do.
I'm a comedian.
- A comedian?
- Yeah, I do stand-up.
I have a show tonight actually.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Wanna come?
You want me to?
Yeah, sure.
Hotel Cafe, eight o'clock.
I'll let you know.
Are you gonna tell me
how old you are or what?
LEE: Diane, my hero.
(CLAPPING) Let's hear it for Diane.
She's a fucking icon! (JEREMY LAUGHING)
You've got almost
two million views in less than 24 hours.
- And that's a good thing?
- Fuck yeah, man.
Everybody's talking about you today.
They love you.
Check this out.
Hey, wait a minute, what...
What is this thing here?
You don't know about the iceberg?
Success is just the tip of the iceberg, man.
But underneath...
is all your experiences
that made that iceberg.
And you're the only one
who knows what's really down there.
It's a metaphor.
People look at you and
they only see the success.
It's like a figurative
representation, like poetry...
Yeah, I see. I get it.
What I don't get is why this
is on your computer.
'Cause it's true.
- Hey, Peter.
- Lee.
I've been trying to reach you all day.
Yeah, what's up?
What did you get into last night?
I don't know.
Well, the phone has not stopped ringing
for you all day.
For what?
For work.
I got offers, I got scripts,
more commercial work.
I just got a call and they wanna bring you in
for this massive new movie called Galactic.
Are you serious?
It's this fantasy thing,
based on a young adult novel
and there's a great role in it for you.
This guy is the ultimate cowboy.
So, there's an offer?
You just need to come in and audition.
I haven't auditioned in
40 fucking years, Peter.
They want you to come in tomorrow.
You can't say no to this, Lee.
You just can't.
Look, the thing is, I got some...
All right.
Fax over the pages.
You still fax?
You seem a little tense.
I'm just trying to focus here, man.
This helps me focus.
Helps me come off the mountain, man.
What fucking mountain are you talking about?
Thought you were already making a movie.
It was a pipe dream.
This is real.
Jesus Christ. You're making me crazy
with all that moving around.
You wanna run lines?
JEREMY: Who are you?
They call me Turner.
That's right.
And I'm here to help you.
But why?
Because you're my daughter.
I've come to save you.
And I need you to come with me. Now.
My father?
You're not my father.
Listen to me.
If we don't go now, we're as good as dead.
My father is dead. He died a long time ago.
It's me.
You don't even look like him!
I had to change the way I look
to protect you.
I did die.
In some ways, I've been dead for a long time.
I had to leave you.
But I did that to save you.
You were better off thinking I was dead.
When I heard the council
was coming after you...
let's just say I'm not dead anymore.
I'm your father.
And I'm here to help you.
I love you.
And you have to come with me.
You have to come
with me now, or we'll both die.
You remember what I always used to call you?
It's me, Buttercup.
I've been gone for a long time.
And I may not look the same.
But it's me.
I'm here now.
I'm here now, and that's...
That's all that matters.
Fuck yeah, man.
I think you're good.
A lot of people, when they get married
they register at some bullshit place,
like Pottery Barn, Crate and Barrel...
I had a friend who works for a non-profit.
She registered for asparagus peelers.
Bitch, you don't have a bed frame.
You can't afford asparagus,
the gay uncle of broccoli.
My husband and I, when we registered,
we registered somewhere practical.
Kaiser Permanente.
We got IVF treatments and pap smears.
Hey, what can I get you?
- Can I have a Michter's, neat, please?
- Yeah.
Make it a beer.
- Whatever's on tap.
- Okay. Be right back.
WOMAN: Last dude I dated, his little
brother worked at an ice cream truck
right outside of my house in New York.
And every day he would
give me free ice cream.
And one day he pops his head
out of the truck and he was like, "Ali,
have you seen my brother?
Oh, my God, you don't know this,
but he's bi-polar.
And he's gone missing."
And I was like, "Oh, my God."
(WHISPERING) "Do I still get free ice cream?"
All right, I've been Ali Wong.
Have a good night, everybody.
Give it up for Ali Wong!
HOST: Ali just got married,
I also just got married.
I loved your speech, by the way.
HOST: Obviously... I married a woman.
You have eyes on your face.
This is not the haircut of a woman
who sleeps with men.
You guys, we're gonna
keep the show right on rolling.
If you loved Ali, you'll love this next
comic. I have known her forever.
She is hilarious.
Let's hear it now for Charlotte Dillon.
Give it up for her.
All right, keep it going for Cameron
Esposito, our awesome host.
I want to tell you
about my day, I had... I had...
an extremely productive day.
My parents would be very proud of me.
Um, I met a guy, and then I fucked him.
- Yeah.
But it's not... but it's not what you think.
I met him through someone
who's really trustworthy:
my drug dealer.
Oh, my God.
Young guys, right?
Young guys, I'm over you guys.
I'm over it. The guy that
I'm fucking right now, older.
Older. And I'm not talking like,
forty seven or something.
I'm talking 70 plus, bitches.
Oh, yeah! Oh-hoh!
Full on senior citizen. Like...
Allowed to withdraw
from a Roth IRA with no penalty.
Remembers when TV was like
black and white and shit.
But here's the thing... Older guys,
they're awesome.
They're awesome, they're experienced...
you know, they know how to treat a lady.
They go slow.
Because they have to.
But okay, can we can we just talk
about the balls for a second?
Right? Let's just, we're gonna talk about it.
I feel like we know each other now.
These balls have dropped.
Golf balls sitting at the bottom
of a tube sock.
It was actually kinda hot.
But you know what's even hotter?
Keeping his heart rate steady.
I mean, what's naughtier than fucking
someone who could die any second?
You know?
It's like...
So, yesterday...
Right? Let's talk about yesterday.
Enough about today.
LEE: In some ways I've been
dead for a long time.
I had to... I had to change the way I look
to protect you.
I did die.
I had to go.
I'm leaving.
I'm your father.
And I'm here to...
I'm your father.
Mr. Hayden.
We're ready for you.
MAN: Hey! There he is.
Good to see you, buddy.
Thanks for coming in on such short notice.
Thanks for having me.
All right.
I'm sorry about all the bother.
It's just that everybody's
reading for this movie.
No matter how big.
It's just the way this studio wants it.
I hope you understand.
No bother at all. I'm happy to do it.
Great. Okay, well... shall we just jump in?
- Uh, you need sides, or...
- Nope.
Ready to go.
Yeah? Okay.
Um, you'll be reading with Linda.
And, uh... let's begin.
LINDA: Who are you?
My name's Turner.
LINDA: Turner?
That's right.
I'm here to help you.
Because I'm your father.
I'm here to help you.
Because you're my daughter.
My father? You're not my father.
I'm sorry.
Could I get the sides actually?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course.
Of course, you can.
Here. Here you go, buddy.
I'm so sorry, I had this down.
I'm so sorry.
Take your time, it's totally fine.
Thank you.
Yeah, don't worry about it, Lee.
You just... Just take your time.
Listen to me, if we don't go now
we're as good as dead.
But you're not my father.
My father is dead. He died a long time ago.
It's me.
You don't even look like him.
I had to change the way I look.
To protect you.
I did die.
I did die.
- I'm so sorry.
- Uh...
- I'm so sorry.
- No, Lee, it's okay.
It's okay. Look, we'll go back.
Let's, let's go back.
Let's go back to...
God damn it!
I'm so sorry.
I apologize. I wasted your time.
PHOTOGRAPHER: Hey, hey. Mr. Hayden.
Lee Hayden. How's it going, buddy?
Not now, man.
We all saw that video of your speech, man.
It was absolutely amazing.
Just happy, out of control.
- Not now.
- Listen...
Are you here for another western?
You're going to be
doing another western, aren't ya?
It's gonna be great.
We'd love to see you on it.
How did the audition go?
Get the fuck out of my face!
Jesus Christ! Relax, man.
Just get the fuck away from me.
Hi, this is Lucy. Leave a message.
I had to do that act, Lee.
I had to do it to try to make
sense of whatever this is.
You know I don't actually feel that way.
But you can't help who you like.
I'm feeling really sorry
that I hurt you because I didn't...
I do like you.
So, I'm sorry.
Nothing I said up there
changes how I feel about you.
I'm dying.
I got cancer and I'm fucking dying.
Cancer's not a death sentence anymore.
Just so you know.
Apparently, the one I have
is one of the worst you can hope for.
What does your oncologist say?
Like surgery?
Radiation, or chemo?
Is it untreatable?
There's a procedure.
Not a cure.
It can buy a few more years.
I just don't know if it's worth it.
Worth it?
Buying time.
Jesus Christ, Lee. You're dying.
It's all about buying time.
I just haven't figured what I wanna do.
What does your family say?
LEE: I haven't told my family.
Are you serious?
I haven't told anyone.
Just you.
You need to tell your family.
And you need to get that procedure.
Tell me you're gonna do it.
I will.
You need to promise me.
I promise.
I almost forgot...
I got you something.
You got me something?
It was the fucking reason
I came over here, man.
My ruse.
I don't know what to say.
Maybe "thanks."
Open it.
Thank you.
Hi, this is Lucy. Leave a message.
Hey, Lucy, it's Lee.
It's your dad.
Look, I know you're upset.
And you have every right to be.
I screwed up.
But I guess you're used to that.
please call me back.
I need to talk to you.
I have something I want to tell you.
LEE: These are very you.
VAL: I'll take that as a compliment.
Is Lucy here?
She was earlier.
Did she tell you what happened?
I fucked up, Val.
I've got something I wanna tell you.
I've... um...
How sick are you?
I guess it's pretty bad.
Were you ever gonna tell me?
How long have you known?
I don't know why you go out
of your way to be so difficult.
You know that, right?
You know how selfish you can be?
You were always away.
And even when you weren't
I was always very aware
that you were in the process of leaving.
And what are you doing now?
And the only reason we're even talking
is because you wanna die
on good terms or something.
Is there something wrong with that?
You don't deserve it, Lee.
You can't just decide to fix things.
I mean, what am I supposed to do?
Just die and that's it?
Over and done?
Would you prefer that?
I wanna get past this.
I wanna get to the next thing.
So, what is the next thing, Lee?
I don't know.
I just know there's got to be another...
Will you just give me a chance?
Give me a chance to write another chapter.
I remember holding hands
with you on this beach.
I held up our hands and I said,
"Your hand is old, and it has wrinkles."
Then I turned our hands over and I said,
"My hand is new and doesn't
have any wrinkles."
I thought you left because
I hurt your feelings.
And I believed that for years.
I'm so sorry.
It really is beautiful out here.
Yes, it is.
WOMAN: Dr. Friedburg's office.
I'd like to make an appointment.
Please hold.
- WOMAN: Thank you for holding.
You said you'd like to make
an appointment, is that right?
JEREMY: This is all you need?
That's it.
JEREMY: Hey, I got the Ultimate
Buster Keaton on Blu-ray.
Wanna stick around?
We could order some Chinese chicken salads.
Yeah, I've got some stuff I'm working on.
Next time, though.
How've you been feeling?
Oh, I meant to tell you.
I found some episodes of Cattle Drive
online last night.
I watched a bunch of them.
How were they?
- Amazing.
You remember that scene we had?
You catch me stealing a horse, and
you're about to beat the shit out of me,
and I tell you I'm an orphan,
and you take pity on me.
Then in the next episode,
they fucking hang me,
and that sends you on
a revenge killing spree.
My death was the whole
reason for that show, man.
Hey there.
LEE: How's it going?
Happy birthday. (CHARLOTTE LAUGHS)
I got you something.
Hold on.
- Yeah.
Did you ever read it?
'Cause it was under the bed.
You know, I used to wanna be a poet.
Like, that was what I wanted to be more
than anything in the world.
You sit down, because you're
gonna listen to this poem.
"Dirge Without Music,"
by Edna St. Vincent Millay.
"I am not resigned to the shutting away
"of loving hearts in the hard ground.
"So it is, and so it will be,
for so it has been,
"time out of mind:
"into the darkness they go,
"the wise and the lovely.
"Crowned with lilies and laurel they go;
"but I am not resigned.
"Lovers and thinkers,
into the earth with you.
"Be one with the dull,
the indiscriminate dust.
"A fragment of what you felt,
of what you knew,
"a formula, a phrase remains...
but the best is lost.
"The answers quick and keen, the honest look,
"the laughter, the love...
"They are gone.
"They are gone to feed the roses.
Elegant and curled is the blossom.
"Fragrant is the blossom. I know.
"But I do not approve.
"More precious was the light in your eyes
than all the roses in the world.
"Down, down, down into
the darkness of the grave,
"Gently they go, the beautiful,
the tender, the kind;
"Quietly they go, the intelligent,
"the witty, and the brave.
"I know.
But I do not approve. And I am not resigned."
LEE: The new sweet and spicy
Lonestar Barbecue sauce,
the perfect partner for your ribs.
The new sweet and spicy
Lonestar Barbecue sauce,
the perfect partner for your ribs.
MAN: That was great, Lee.
Can you do one more?