The Irish Connection (2022) Movie Script

[upbeat music]
- "Don't think I will kiss you,
"although you need
to be kissed badly
"and that's what's
wrong with you.
"You need to be
kissed and often,
"and by someone who knows how."
- I know it, I know it.
- That wasn't the one I was
originally gonna go for,
but you're a bit too
good at this game.
- Gone with the Wind.
- Yeah.
This is definitely your game.
- My turn.
"I have this little problem.
"I have a stalker
and I need a cover.
"I need for you to
pretend we're having
"a scintillating conversation
"and that you are
wildly entertained."
- Damn you might have
got me on this one.
[tongue clicking]
Vanilla Sky.
- Much better than me.
- "See your problem,
"is you're beautiful.
"You have beautiful legs,
beautiful body, beautiful face.
"And all these guys
in love with you.
"But you have a
look in your eye.
"Like you haven't been
fucked in a year."
Something tells me
that was a little bit
too close to home
for you, was it?
- It's fine.
- You are a proper
geek, aren't you?
- I try not to disappoint.
- Right, I'm gonna take a piss.
What? It's better out
than in, isn't it?
It was a roomy dinner.
- Little more information
than I needed,
but you go right ahead.
[suspenseful music]
- How well do you
know that girl?
- Sorry, what'd you say to me?
- How well do you
know that girl?
- What the fuck is this?
- The girl's a spy, Rory Baker.
- Hold on, I know you.
Brody, yeah?
Just outta prison.
Tell me do you fancy
going back in, do ya?
- Prison's not a
very nice place.
No friends in there,
locked up in a tiny cell
with all your
freedoms taken away.
She set me up, Rory.
[gentle guitar music]
- Hey.
- See, she's not
who she says she is.
Bruised egos repair themselves.
You should call
your brother-in-law.
- My man here can
look after anything.
[suspenseful music]
- A gun pointed straight
at your soft tissue,
small, but without immediate
medical assistance,
survival's looking pretty grim.
Oh, Rory?
He didn't wanna hang around
after we told him who you were.
- Charlotte Green.
- That's not someone
who's very high
on our Christmas card list.
Where is she?
- Behind a desk.
She didn't take to field work.
- Unlike you.
- Gun possession.
Threatening an agent.
That's 20 years at least.
- I'll take my chances.
[upbeat music]
- You left so soon.
- Sorry darling, you're just
you're not my type.
- Like you had a chance.
You'll shoot your balls
off keeping your gun there.
- I like to keep it handy.
Come on, little girl.
We don't even know what
agency you're from.
- Please don't do this.
- Well, where's the fun in that?
[intense music]
[neck cracks]
[car engine roaring]
[intense music]
[door closing]
[music intensifies]
[light clicks on]
- Should have taken your keys.
- You're no sport at all.
I was planning to jump out
and test your reflexes.
I do have a present
of sorts for you.
It's an anti-banana
disguise [laughs].
- My hand hurts,
what do you want?
- I want a debrief on
your mysterious priest
and the 500,000 pounds in
negotiable bearer bonds.
Did you just roll your eyes?
- This is my home, Miranda.
- Please don't shed a
tear for that low life.
He was hardly the
cure for cancer.
- It's C1 and C2 complete.
That means his spinal
cord's so broken,
they'll never be able to fix it.
- So take the counseling
being offered and get over it.
Regardless of what
happened, you did well.
Rory and his crew were
being pimped by your priest.
This is the job, Aureille.
You want to save the world.
I empathize.
- I was just showing off.
He called me 'little girl.'
- Interesting trigger.
One of my pet names for you.
Look, Astin Brody's retired
another field operative
to a desk.
If you want, you can
join Charlotte Green.
- I have no interest in
joining your babble of bimbos.
And we broke up, it happens.
- I wouldn't dare
call you a bimbo.
And you broke up with me.
- You were cheating.
- Well, don't judge me.
I was bullied as a child,
it made me open to flattery.
You blew a six month
undercover operation,
tracking me going to a hotel.
- And you couldn't resist
a mousy 21-year-old,
because you were bullied.
- Abuse of agency resources
is gross misconduct Aureille,
and the only reason you
weren't pulled up on charges
was that I intervened.
- You didn't do that for me.
- Why don't you curse?
I haven't heard you say
a 'fuck' or a 'shit'
in all these years.
I assure you it feels great.
Real people curse, Aureille.
- Bite me.
- That's still not a curse.
[upbeat music]
Here comes Skippy
carrying and his pool cue
Into the chippy fresh
from the dole queue
Good days, he's
finally got some work
He's a good looking fella
And it says so on
his new t-shirt
And there goes Betty
off to the bingo
Hope she gets a sweaty
Hope she knows the lingo
Eyes down, no
more smokey lights
With the snowball in her bag
She's going out tonight
These are times
of temptation
Everybody's on a mission
We're livin' in a fake
museum growing further apart
But we are all
individual works of art
We are all individual
works of art
Oh yes we are
[instrumental music]
These are times
of transition
Everybody's on a mission
We're livin' in a fake
museum growing further apart
But we are all
individual works of art
Skippy spies Betty
buyin' a Bacardi
Sneaks up like a yeti
Invites her to a party
Oh man, he's
layin' on the charm
Oh man, he's
layin' on the charm
And she knows
she wants to go
But she thinks she'll
let him twist her arm
[instrumental music]
[intense music]
[car engine roaring]
- You fuckin' maniac you...
- What's up, you? I
missed you, ya Jessie.
- Come on get in, let's go.
- Fuck's sake.
[intense music]
- This wasn't our agreement.
You stood right there.
You stood right there
and promised us.
- You're technically not
witnesses, I'm sorry.
- You have no clue
or even understanding
of the risk we're taking
even talking to you.
Jump in anytime.
- I mean, we're not
technically witnesses, so.
- Don't listen to him.
Look, we have no
idea where he is.
- The priest is
protected by Bishop.
- That caped-crusader
is stonewalling me.
[gentle guitar music]
- She's upstairs. Room four,
but she's with a client now,
so maybe give her a moment.
- Oh there's no talking
to muscle, I'm afraid.
- Nice line.
[gentle guitar music]
[motorcycle engine running]
- Where do we go?
What do we do?
- You need to leave town.
I don't know for how long,
but at least until after
I've put these guys away.
- Come on dad, I mean we,
we could do with an holiday, so.
- Shut up, Jay.
You're not thinking
with a right head.
It won't be a holiday.
We'll be looking over our
shoulders the whole time.
You involved us.
This is your doing.
- All right, just,
come, well, you're...
you're being a bit harsh now.
Just, don't listen to him okay?
I actually got you
a little something.
[gentle guitar music]
- The priest had accomplices.
- And?
- Jay won't thank you, trust me.
- You said you preferred
silver to gold.
- We were talking about
conductors in headphones.
- Yeah, it's just
a little something.
[gentle guitar music]
- Thank you.
- We're done here.
[birds chirping]
[intense music]
[phone ringing]
- Hello?
- Hi Jay, I was just
thinking about you.
- It's not really
a good time, babe.
- It's just that you
haven't been by in a while.
- Thought you said
I was a bit creepy.
The whole staring thing.
- Well, you know I was
just having a bad day.
You know you are
my favorite client.
[car engine running]
- Uh, gotta go.
- That enough?
- We got him.
Hope that was good
for you, love.
[car door slamming]
- I bloody told you to
get rid of that phone.
- It just rang okay.
What you want me to do?
[phone breaks]
- You could have just
taken the SIM out
and kept the phone!
This is not my fault, okay?
- No, it's that
bloody agent's fault.
- She is trying her best.
- You're barking up
the wrong tree there.
It's embarrassing.
- What's that?
- What's it look like?
An inconspicuous car.
- And where are we
supposed to put the bags?
- The other choice was walking.
You've been watching
the building?
- It's been clear, okay?
The last couple
of hours, anyway.
[bells ringing]
- I'm not having that.
She ain't a dike.
- She used us.
- Oh, what, like that asshole
priest you're related to?
- I wasn't there
for your brother.
He had too many temporary goals.
- Half-brother, and
that's just guilt talking.
- So yous are off then?
- Aye, thanks for everything.
- Oh yes, especially
those breakfasts.
- This should cover the costs.
- Oh, there's no need for that.
- No, we'll not be coming back.
I'm settling the bill.
- The bill?
- For the bed and breakfast.
- The bed and
breakfast is next door.
- Who is it you think we are?
- You're Margaret's
friends from Westway.
- Maggie, it's Maggie.
- Bloody Maggie, ain't it.
- Was her passing sudden was it?
- Aye, very sudden.
- Yeah, you could say we're
only just finding out about it.
[bells ringing]
- Right.
I'm gonna turn round,
don't you be long.
- Okey dokey.
- Quick as you can, hurry up.
[gentle guitar music]
- Here.
- Where's your dad?
- I dunno what
you're talking about.
- I'd smack you about,
but I don't believe
in cruelty to animals.
- Oh fuck, me bollocks.
[upbeat music]
- Go, go go, go, go, go.
- Who are you?
[metal crashing]
[uplifting music]
- Morning, landlord.
- Something wrong with
your eyes, Father?
- How you doing?
It's hot in here, isn't it?
I think you should
pop around later.
Looks like you've got a
bunch of sins to confess.
- Don't be cheeky.
Sure you won't stay
for a pint, Father?
- Nope.
Just here for some bread.
- I am my father's pride
and joy and will marry well,
but in the meantime, I'm sure
I've got a free afternoon.
- Business first.
Guten tag.
Make it your goal to be
at peace with your soul
Who are you
[car engine roaring]
[ominous music]
[car door slam]
[slow tempo music]
- How you feeling?
- Kicking a lot.
- Think it's a boy?
- No.
- Let me present to you,
the gang who could
not shoot straight.
- You homesteaders have
been talking out of school.
- No, no I've not said
nothing to nobody I promise.
- You were warned to
stay away from the agent.
Tell them.
- Oh, that's my line.
[ominous music]
Yous were seen.
- Look, we have no
idea where he is.
- The priest is
protected by Bishop.
- That caped-crusader
is stonewalling me.
[motorcycle engine running]
[gentle guitar music]
- Now I wanna list of the topics
you had in conversation
with that agent.
And I want it now.
[ominous music]
- Rory, the stupids
don't understand,
try using words of one syllable,
shouldn't be a stretch for you.
- Casper on my signal I
want you unleash hell.
After that,
I'll tell you if they're wearing
women's underwear or not.
- Daniel will never give
up his favorite son.
Will you old man?
- Bearer bonds
worth 500,000 pound.
That will buy a whole
lot of pain, you know.
- I'll give him up.
- Jay, shut up.
Alice, listen to me.
I'm just a father.
I wanna make sure my son's safe.
That's all, nothing
about you or your family.
I promise.
- So, you were warned old man.
You know what?
Nothing spoils a target
better than a hit.
- [screaming] Fuckin'
hell, he shot me!
[upbeat music]
- Jesus, Rory.
- Fuckin' toe off...
- You see, you shoot a man's
toe off with his pants down,
And believe me, Texas
is not the place
that you wanna be caught in.
- He said church protection.
- Yeah, well that's
just not gonna fly.
'Cause that's not a
real fuckin' priest.
- Enough, Rory.
[heavy breathing]
- They think he's real
They think there's
papers to prove it.
- If the church is protecting
him the priest is lost to us.
- Oh, I will get
the bishop to talk.
I'll get the bishop to talk.
The priest is my half-brother.
- Huh, stupid has a point.
- The bishop won't roll
over on his own clergy.
- Well that just pisses
me off, doesn't it?
- What do you think, Casper?
- I think we should
drip dry 'em.
- It was a rhetorical question.
Let me do the thinking.
I'm gonna charge the stupids
with bringing back the priest,
offer them their lives in
exchange for the bearer bonds.
- What we have here is a
failure to communicate.
[gentle guitar music]
- The moment he tells you
anything you're in danger.
- Yeah, but what's to
stop us just disappearing?
You could come with.
- Trust me, that's
an amazing idea.
There are too many
ghosts in my life.
- Maybe someday.
The quiet life.
[engine turning over]
No, no, no, no...
What was that look about
between you and her?
- Nothing.
- It's five nothings
since before we left,
must be something.
[slow tempo music]
- It has a tracker.
You dump it,
I'll kill you at the
first opportunity.
- What you've just
done there is probably,
one of the most idiotic
things I think I've ever seen.
In fact everyone
in this building,
is a little more
stupid because of it.
- You're a sad,
strange little man.
And you have my pity.
I'm the boss, accept it.
And he is not leaving my sight.
- It's the birth
of me son, Rory.
It's important.
- You gonna follow
stupids on your own, no?
Didn't think so.
[upbeat music]
[bus engine roaring]
- All right, let me
take the lead on this.
- Okay.
- 'Cause you always
take the... what?
- Okay.
- Yes!
- What's the crack?
- What the hell are
yous two doing here?
Get out, both of you!
- No, no, steady on,
Father, okay, 'cause-
- I am not a fuckin'
priest, you gobshite.
I am a fuckin' bishop.
And you address me
as your eminence,
or indeed, your grace.
- Okay, your grace, then.
Just, where, where is he?
- Out, about east.
- Stop, we've got
a right to know.
- Why's your monkey
doin' all the talking?
- Jay's taking the lead here.
- Oh, moving up
in the world, Jay.
I told your father long ago,
you're gettin' nothing of me.
- Sorry to bother
you, your grace.
I noticed you got
some uninvited guests.
- They're just leaving.
- I'm Sister Assumpta
of the five ones.
Why don't we chat outside?
- Hell of a grip.
- Mother Superior always
said I was a nun on the run,
but I loved extra help.
And so not sure what
I could run from.
- See them out, Sister.
- No, no, no, no.
I lost a toe 'cause
of that bastard, so-
- Right, you went there?
- No, I'm sorry, your grace.
Look, our lives are
on the line here.
- The show's over. Get
out the both of yous.
God bless and all that.
- Boys, yous have
said your piece.
- You're making a
mistake, though.
- Your brother is in Malta.
I don't want you
to get killed, Jay.
The Bishop's a proud man.
There are people eager
to attack the Bishop.
I just don't want his
reputation soiled.
- Thank you, Sister.
- Game on, father of mine.
- You can wipe that
smug look off your face
for a start.
- I'm Kool & the Gang, mate,
but that bastard owes me a toe.
[upbeat music]
- And that was my OBE.
- Order of the British Empire.
- Mm, I love an
intelligent woman.
Smart is so sexy.
[upbeat music]
[knocking on door]
- You have to go.
- Who is it?
- Miranda, I know
you're in there.
- She can't find you here.
- Can't you just tell her?
- Are you a complete
moron? I'm your boss.
This bitch will use
that against me.
Fuck off.
[heavy sigh]
What do you want?
- Where is she?
- Who?
[upbeat music]
- Oh, I've seen this
seduction before.
You are bloody predictable,
if not original.
- Still haven't quite
got the hang of cursing.
- Why have you been
ignoring my voicemails?
- You're not going to Malta.
- The priest is there
with the bearer bonds.
- Yes, and he's being
chased by Alice Baker
and her motley crew.
How's the counseling going?
- I heard you've
been getting updates.
- That's illegal.
Those sessions are
private and confidential.
That being said,
there are a few raised
eyebrows over ending
your career progression.
- Fast-tracked by
your helping hand.
Part of the seduction.
- That is a serious accusation.
- Authorize my trip to
Malta or I go off book.
- Oh, going rogue.
How very daring.
Then again, I never could trust
you to do what you're told.
- That's your thing,
isn't it, Miranda?
Bullies, love control.
I, uh, checked the
old school records.
It gives me chills thinking
of you in total control.
- What are you doing?
- Miss being this close to you.
- Don't tease me,
I won't change-
- Authorize my trip.
- And if I do?
[gentle guitar music]
- Goodbye, Miranda.
- Oh, Jesus.
[upbeat music]
- Would you forget
about my sister?
This is down to me.
Just get me the damn
flight to Malta.
I don't care how much
it costs, just do it.
[door slamming]
- Sorry I was late,
alarms were going off and-
- What the fuck
is wrong with you?
- I was planning on telling you.
I'm not feeling well.
- Are you pregnant?
I don't give a shit
how you're feeling!
- Stop!
Would you calm down, will ya?
- We're under a microscope and
I've gotta hear on the street
that you roughed up
some punk in a club.
- Fuck's sake, Casper always-
- Don't blame fucking Casper.
Harry comes to me,
tells me the police
got a description
and the make of your car.
Why don't you give them
a fucking urine sample?
- The priest was
the one who was-
- Shut up.
That priest outsmarted
you every step of the way.
Now I hear your booking
flights to Malta.
Shut up!
People that do that
wanna get caught.
- You think I just
want to get caught?
- Yeah, you wanna get caught.
I've seen it all before.
Fucking cowboy act.
You just wanna be a
big, bad guy already.
- No, I-
- Shut up!
- These stupids are
gonna mess up everything,
I'm telling you.
- Put 'em on the screen.
[phone ringing]
Have yous got the packages.
- Mm, yeah, just a quick one.
You, you see this?
Like who... can't get it out,
um, uh, who's is this?
Like where, where am
I gonna drop this?
- It's your per diem.
- Absolutely.
Yeah, it's my per diem.
With you there, but where...
who's gonna get, who am
I dropping this off to?
- It's yours.
You keep it.
- What this is mine?
- Fucking idiots.
- Do you get one?
- Yeah.
- Keep your phone charged.
I want those bearer bonds, and
I want that fucking priest.
- Yeah, so crystal...
With ya, crystal clear, yeah.
- You don't speak to anyone
while you're working,
and when you're not working,
you're on call 24 hours a day.
Don't get drunk or do anything
that prevents you from
operating in a
professional manner.
Now tell that back to me.
- You want us to, first of all,
check out the...
- Let him tell me.
- Oh yeah, no, I got it.
I'm with you. Got it, got it.
- Tell me.
- I don't really
know why you've...
Why are they picking on me.
- Because your fucking brother
stole my fucking bearer bonds
and I don't like
you, you cocksucker.
- It's my half-brother.
- We're on it.
[instrumental music]
- Come here.
You are in for it now, you are.
- Yeah, not if I get you first.
- Ah, you horny little devil.
- You promised to
take me shopping.
- Stop being so fucking
relentless with that, Agnes.
I'm working on it.
- Yeah, and you've been
saying that for weeks.
- Ah, fuck.
- What, why are you leaving?
You said we had all afternoon.
- I've got somewhere to be.
Stop acting like a little child.
- Where the hell were you?
We had to get the boss.
Who's the tart?
- Just a local.
- Dick.
- Whore trouble.
So my dear, tell your
brother where you were.
- I felt it better than
drawin' attention to us.
- How are you brother Kraut?
- We didn't get the money.
What did my brother say?
- Wee shit's workin'
with Alice Baker.
- Shit!
- Your father too,
apparently, by all accounts.
- No, not my father.
They must have turned up
the pressure on my old man.
- You act naturally as
if there's nothing wrong.
We can't let them know that
we made a deal with a Kraut.
- I got mass in half an hour.
- Message the Kraut.
Tell him I'll meet him after.
[instrumental music]
- Nice pinny.
Is my sister home yet?
- No.
- Well, then I accept your
invitation to come in.
- She'll be back in a minute.
- Slap the kettle on.
[door slamming]
Silence is deafenin'.
And you know what?
- And?
There's no problem.
- Alice has set this up.
A bastard priest,
the bearer bonds.
- The priest stole 'em from you.
- Alice is losing her mind
'cause of this pregnancy
and you, you're no help.
You know, we take
care of that priest
and everyone else
will fall into line.
- Oi, Alice is the boss.
- Yeah, and she's months
off from maternity.
Then it's just you
and me, brother.
Telling you, we do this right,
We play this whole
town like a fiddle.
We hit Malta running, yeah?
Take care of the priest.
Get the bearer bonds and
nothing else matters.
- I can't go to frickin' Malta.
The birth of me son.
- She won't even
know that we're gone.
We're back tomorrow, and boom.
- If I miss the birth of
my son, I'll kill you.
- It's a fair, fair deal.
Come on Casper.
You know this makes sense.
- All right, I'll do it.
But, I'm taking me foot massager
and me Austrian Christmas music.
- Hey honey, I'm home.
There you are, I
was wondering...
Why are you blocking the door?
- Sorry, I was just
folding some clothes.
- I'm so tired.
Traffic was a nightmare
down the road.
Has my brother been here?
- No.
Listen, I am taking you
out for dinner tonight.
- Ah, I'm beat Casper.
- Oh, come on.
I've booked a table
and everything.
- What?
No, I'm not made up to go out.
- Oh forget the
Oompa Loompa look.
You look fantastic
without makeup.
- I'm not going anywhere
without my face on, Mister.
Okay, okay.
I'll go if you give
me a foot massage.
My feet are killing me.
Yeah, that's good.
Mm, just there, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh my, oh babe that is
really doing it for me.
Come here.
I'm wearing your
favorite underwear.
- What about the baby?
- Sh, doctor says it's fine.
[plane landing]
- There is no choice.
- 'Cause you'll
always choose him.
'Cause he's your favorite.
- I'm not listening,
I'm done with this.
- Ah, I know what
you're thinking.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're thinking when all
the dust settles and that
we're gonna go back and we're
just gonna play happy fams.
I-I'm telling you now
that is not gonna happen.
- He deserves another chance.
- Ah, yeah, you just
remember who stuck by you
all these years.
- As if you'd let me forget it.
- Here you are.
You're on the front
cover, you dick.
[upbeat music]
- Right, when we get in there,
I'm gonna do the talking.
- How'd that work out before?
- You said I could
take the lead.
- All right, all right.
- In the name of the father,
the son, and the holy spirit.
- Sweet Jesus, Jay.
You almost gave
me a heart attack!
- Sorry about that, Father.
- Right?
Mass is over.
There's no confession tonight.
- So what's the
crack, then, brother?
- Jay.
What happened to your foot?
- Rory shot me.
We almost died 'cause of
you, you fuckin' asshole.
- I bet there was
a woman involved.
- Oh, don't, I, okay...
I'm not the only one who knows
you're here, you're here.
Yeah, that Alice, Alice Baker.
She knows you're here as well.
- That's a horse of
a different color.
- No, I'm taking you back.
You and the bastard bearer
bonds, we're gonna...
What, just like that?
- Do you want me
to beg and plead?
- Yeah, be a start.
- All right, all
right, wait there.
I'm gonna get my
keys from the vestry.
- No, but wait, hang on!
Slippery bastard, get back here.
- Are you all right
in there, Father?
- Yes, just, just
looking for my keys.
- The door appears
to be locked, Father.
- It's a bit heavy.
- Wanker.
- Is the front door
locked, Father?
- Hello, Dad.
- Wait, wait!
[car engine rumbling]
- Ladies, put the handbags away.
Hey, hey, hey.
Hey, you have had your say.
- All right, I'll
buy some pints.
Start over.
- You're gonna let him get
away with this, ain't you?
- He said he's sorry.
What more do you
want, jam with it?
[upbeat music]
We get somethin' to
eat and we're gone.
Agreed or we leave.
- It's all right, landlady.
It's only me.
- Oh, hello, asshole.
I mean, Father.
Didn't realize it was you.
I thought it was just
one of the normal people.
Take any table you want.
- Ah, Jay.
- What's up with her?
Don't ask.
Is there any table service
in this place then?
- What do you want?
- Gorgeous, gorgeous Gilman.
Meet my brother Jay.
- Oh, another asshole.
- Yeah, she seems to know you.
- We're only after a menu.
- What do you think then, bruv?
- Seems to like you.
Got no idea why.
- Right, then, Agnes.
I guess it's pints all
around, then, yeah?
- Hey, let's not.
It'll not go well.
- All right. You guys
caught me fair enough.
Round of applause.
You can't deny a dead man
walking his last pint.
- I would.
- All right, what will
make you happy then, Agnes?
- Hmm, your head on a stake.
- I'll have the super
duper hot dog surprise,
with extra mustard.
What's the surprise?
- That you're even getting one.
- Same.
- I'll take the same as well.
- Lose the ridiculous costume.
She still thinks
you're a priest.
- Listen, she's into
authority figures, all right?
- You're not gonna
give him back, are you?
- Of course he is.
I've got confidence
that our father
has got this cunning,
masterful plan.
- Alice Baker and her
gang are miles away.
- We are gonna hand the bearer
bonds back to the agent.
- Of course.
But I'm not handing him over.
- You think this agent has
got this lucrative government
witness protection and a
house out in the suburbs.
For what?
For a monthly salary bonus?
You're smarter than that.
- We're technically
not witnesses.
- Oi, go easy.
- What?
- The car, big deposit.
- Why did you hire a
sports car, anyway?
- You wanna drive around
in crap, you hire it.
Shirt's sticking to me.
How far to the hotel?
- There's no hotel.
We have a flight in the morning.
- I need a fucking shower, Rory.
- I don't get this country.
There's no signal anywhere.
I mean, if we can't
have a signal,
we don't find these idiots.
- Wifi at an hotel.
- Touche, touche.
[intense music]
[motorcycle engine roaring]
The wifi is shit in here.
- Need to do it
old school, Rory.
With our feet.
- Old school.
Nah, spoil the leather
on your shoes doin' that.
I mean, I'm getting wifi, but
I'm not getting
any signal off it.
Here, you have a new phone.
Give us that.
- Phone's switched off.
- Porquoi?
- Alice don't know where I am.
- Don't tell me
she's tracking you.
You put up with that shit.
Fuck, just give us it.
Only two minutes, I'll
switch it right off.
Come on, it's the least you
can do after recent trauma
you put me through.
- No.
- Just give us
your fuckin' phone.
- No!
- The faster we find
these two idiots
the faster you can go home
to your crazy wife and
your new unborn family.
- Two minutes and turn
it off straight after.
- Thank you.
Very nice of you.
- My brother turned
up unexpectedly.
If you've got it all then
we can make the exchange.
Are you havin' a fuckin'
bubble about half?
I want it-
- Listen, you dumb Kraut.
Don't mess us about
or I won't be pleased.
Give us our money or we walk.
[gentle guitar music]
- Why are they here?
- Clearly Rory
doesn't trust you.
- Okay, but is it just my
brother he doesn't trust
or is it us as well?
Look, can you get
us out of this?
- The bearer bonds
have to go back, Jay.
If the priest testifies, we
might be able to do a deal
on a lower sentence.
- He's not a priest, is he?
- Quiet life is very
appealing right now.
- I know it's not gonna happen.
- Jay, you should know that
the priest isn't running this.
- I mean, I had my
suspicions, but makes sense.
You know, he always
was the favorite.
- He stayed to protect you.
- No, it was probably
guilt though, wasn't it?
- I'll be on the
docks in an hour.
Quiet life.
- What's up with you?
- Mixed signals.
I'm gonna go.
- She told you, didn't she?
[tense music]
- I've got nothing to
say to you right now.
- It isn't how it was.
- I'm just gonna go.
Drain the lizard.
- All right, lads.
What can I get for you?
- Conversation with these two?
- I did my best for you.
- Yeah, why doesn't it
feel like that, then?
- You're owed an
explanation, obviously.
- You never hit a
man with glasses.
You hit him with a baseball bat.
[tense music]
[waves crashing]
- Do you wanna explain to
me how, how all of a sudden
you are some sort
of Je m'appelle
big bollocks asshole
arch criminal,
'Cause I dunno how I'm
goin' about my business,
and all of a sudden, my
brother's a fucking priest
and you are like Al Capone!
What the fuck?
Seriously? What the fuck?
- Boys!
- Hey, would you give
us a minute, please?
- Go on then, pipe up,
I'd fucking love to know.
[unintelligible yelling]
[unintelligible yelling]
[motorcycle engine roaring]
- I'm fed up with this,
now I'm goin' home.
I'm goin' home, seriously.
- I give up.
[phone ringing]
- Oh, you didn't
turn it off you tit!
- Do I look like an arsehole?
- Hello, baby.
- Don't hello, baby me.
What are you doing in Malta?
- Ah, well, Rory-
- Rory?
I'm gonna kill him and then
force feed his carcass to you.
- I'm really sorry, baby.
But the signal.
- Casper, don't you dare.
- You, you're breaking up.
You're break, breaking.
- Fucking...
[tense music]
- Whoa, Casper!
What the actual fuck?
- You killed my boy!
- Oh, shut up!
- Can we find the priest
old school, using our feet.
- That's just great.
That's just fucking great.
Hold on to your love
I'm a believer
I believe in love
Ain't gonna deceive ya
And I know that love is
Expressing what love is
And I know my
heart will be true
- Looks like
something you enjoy.
- Hardly rocket science.
The priest was in here the
other day with two family
members, but I didn't
see any resemblance.
- Will you tell me where he is?
- I dunno.
He's a shit, but
I like him a lot.
- Please.
- I can't.
Oh, for God's sake.
[gentle guitar music]
- I'm gonna kill
that bastard priest
and you shortly after.
- Please Jay, let me explain.
- I don't want to hear it.
Just gonna be another
load of old bollocks.
[dramatic music]
- Clothes, clothes!
- Somebody will see us!
- No, no, we grab the
clothes and we just,
we scarper, we run
really fast and...
- Jay, I was doing
it for the family.
- No, you just exclude
me from your family.
Abort! Abort! Abort!
[dramatic music]
- I hate clowns.
- No, not the
clown, the clobber.
This is perfect!
- I'm not wearing that!
- You, you're
putting it on! Now!
- You know, if you kill
a priest in a church
you go straight to hell.
- You're not a priest.
- I wear the collar.
I represent Jesus on earth.
Now that's a fact.
- Oh, yeah, a fact.
I love facts.
How about I've got a nine
millimeter gun pressed
just above your kidneys,
and if I pull the trigger,
the bullet will rip through
several of your nonvital organs
and it'll take you up
to three days to die?
That's a fact.
- Why did you tell Jay?
- Because he was a good person.
- He's not dead.
I just don't feel it.
- Where are the bearer bonds?
Show me.
[papers shuffling]
- Holy mother of mercy I'm
going to hell for that one.
- I'm not judging or condoning
any hitting of a woman,
but great to see you, Sister.
- Rory and Casper are here.
- Yeah, I know.
They killed my father and my
brother, according to her.
- We have to lose the costumes,
we'll be too easy to spot.
- We'll dump them after the
Germans hand over the cash.
- How much?
- Half.
- Fuckin' half?
- Your grace, there're
clowns watchin' us.
- Fancy seein' you here, Father.
- I am a fuckin' bishop.
- What have you done to her?
- Is she is alive?
- I hope so.
- Forget the agent, Jay.
Have you made up with him?
- He won't let me explain.
- No, no, and I won't either.
- 'Cause you're... oh, you
are a pair of bastards.
- She's coming around, Sister.
Hit her again.
- Don't you dare.
- I won't, I promise!
- Hm, now the tables have
turned now, ain't they?
Give me that bag.
You all stay,
you'll stay, just...
You'll be okay.
You all stay there,
I'm very angry.
- I'm a fuckin'
bishop ya wee shite!
- How are you feelin'?
Sorry about the
bump on the head.
- I know you, Marguerite
Ogle, eight years of forgery.
Mark Ogle, serial con man.
- I can't go back
to prison, I can't.
- Get on a plane and go home.
If I ever see either
of you again...
[tense music]
- Hand me that bag, Jay.
- No, no...
- Please, Jay!
I'm not an arch criminal,
I'm just a father
trying to do his best.
- Dad, this was not your best.
- Would you prefer me in prison?
- Yeah, yeah!
You know, I nearly died.
So yes, yes I would.
- I think you owe Jay a solid.
I thought you were dead, yeah.
- We're in trouble.
- Okay, get a car.
Meet me on the coast
road, north exit.
- This will not end well.
- Hang on lads. I have an idea.
Follow me.
- No, no but Aurielle
needs our help!
- She can take care of herself!
Come on!
[dramatic music]
- Jay, you're up.
- I can't hot wire it, the fuck?
What's that? It's
silly, crazy silly.
Space car, bollocks.
- What's the story, Jay?
- Just gimme a minute!
- Fellas, oh fellas.
Looks like he's coming
for his lunch time snack.
- Come on!
- I've got it, get in the
fucking back, come on!
[car engine roaring]
[dramatic music]
Look, look, we need to
go back for Aurielle.
- Sex appeal, Jay.
It's all sex appeal!
The agencies have
always played for keeps.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they threw me off a bastard
cliff in me fucking pants,
I totally understand, all right?
- In your pants?
- Don't you dare laugh,
I am a grown man!
- Jay, Jay, stop it Jay!
For the love of Jesus,
the two of yous...
- Toodle-oo.
- Stop right there!
- I've got the bearer bonds.
It's just the
priest and the dad.
- The troops are on their way.
Mission complete, Aurielle.
How could you hand
in your resignation?
The agency plays for keeps.
- Why do you even care?
- Because I'm an Oxford
educated visionary,
and you're a fucking idiot
who never figured out
that all these flash moves
are better on a chorus line.
- Charming, thank you.
- Jay can't save you.
- No, but I can save him.
- Good luck with that.
[intense music]
[motorcycle engine roaring]
- All right, I
deserved that, yeah?
I understand that, Jay.
- Just wait, this
is not finished.
[car engine roaring]
[intense music]
[motorcycle engine roaring]
- You're mine now, you fuck.
[gun shots]
- They're shooting!
[motorcycle engine roaring]
[gun shots]
[gun shots]
- Will you stop firing
at me fucking car?
- Bastards!
- Oh, Hallelujah.
[engines roaring]
- Asshole.
[motorcycle engine roaring]
- You're being a baby.
- Hm, you like her don't you?
- I have not forgiven you yet.
- I know.
- It's just a graze,
but keep it clean.
Jay, there's a
hotel by the coast.
They're friendly,
you can go there.
How are you doing?
- Yeah, strangely all right.
- Keep it clean.
- If he doesn't, will he die?
- It might take awhile.
- We've got time.
- Where's the troops?
- They're on their way, but
you need to hide from Rory
and his pet gorilla.
- Oh, fantastic.
She is amazing.
- Yeah, I know.
- What?
- Fuck's sake.
[waves crashing]
- That agent, she
was easy on the eye.
- Hey, no, no, no, no.
You don't get to
talk about her, ever.
- We had this moment,
you know, look.
I'm saying she didn't give-
- Seriously, you
want to start again?
Are we doing this again?
- The both of ya.
- It's like a long weekend
with Zippy and Bongo.
Can't take a joke.
- Give him some space.
In fact, the both of us.
- You're the one that decided
to go back and protect him.
- I saw what you did
with the bearer bonds.
- Well, bang goes me deposit.
Fucking big deposit.
- Yeah, think on
the bright side,
you know, it used to
symbolize how much you earned,
now it symbolizes
how much you owe.
- What?
This is all your fault.
- My fault?
I didn't steal the
fuckin' car, did I?
Look, we'll get someone
to fix it, don't worry.
[phone vibrating]
- Geez.
- So you're returning
me calls now, are you?
Yeah, relax.
We have them in our sights.
Oh, uh...
Casper, it's a boy.
- Alice?
She fucking hung up.
Told me not to
bother going home.
- That's, it's probably
just the heat of the moment.
It'll be fine when we
get back, you know?
Look, you always wanted
a boy, didn't you?
So congratulations.
Hey man, I'm sorry, I...
- Fuck you!
- Casper, come on.
- Fuck you.
- Fuck you going?
- Fuck you!
- Casper! Oh, for
God's sake, Casper.
[gentle guitar music playing]
- Jay, I'm sorry man.
- You were told to be quiet.
- All I was trying
to do was apologize.
- I know the value
of your apologies.
- All right, you guys go ahead.
Give me two seconds,
man, I just want to pee.
- Oh, for fuck's sake, just...
- Well, well, well.
Where's the priest?
- I killed him.
- I've met many men,
done many deeds.
You two are not cruel.
Where's the fucking bonds?
- Killed them too.
Do you know, I'm, I'm
actually just a bit,
a bit fed up with this mate.
You're, you're, you're...
doing my nut right in.
Yeah, tell you
what, tell you what,
if you carry on the
way you're going, then,
then I'm gonna kill you too.
[bells ringing]
- Guess me specialty.
- Oral hygiene.
- I can't kill Rory.
So you're gonna have to pay.
- Well, with respect, mate,
I've already been flung off a
cliff and made to run through
the middle of Malta
in my bastard pants.
So, I, I, I kind of think
I've, I've paid enough.
- I missed the birth of me son.
I should have been there.
Instead I'm friggin' over
here chasing stupids.
This should help.
- Course, you should have
swabbed it with alcohol.
I might get an infection.
- What is it?
- Sodium amytal or
some other truth drug.
- Makes you tell the truth?
- Yep.
- Does it work?
- Yep.
Ask me somethin' I'd lie about.
- Are we gonna die?
- Yep.
- Fuck it works, then, don't it?
- He's gonna
torture us to death.
Or slit our throats.
Or bury us alive.
- Oh, Jesus Christ.
Leave it off, fuckin' hell.
- Were you gonna leave me?
- Can't ask me that,
I won't answer.
- No, no, now come on.
Were you gonna leave me?
- Yes.
- Why'd you come back?
- You're my son. I
couldn't leave you.
- No, no, you're a fucking...
You're a scumbag, mate.
- Yeah, I'm a lying scumbag.
[breathing heavily]
- I'm not a psychopath.
But you might think I am
by the time I'm finished.
- I know something
you don't know.
I know something you don't know.
- Dad, what are you doing?
- We're gonna get outta here.
You know those ropes.
I loosened them.
- Get him, Dad! Dad, get him!
Choke, come on,
Dad, go on Dad...
- Ow!
- I'm gonna kill your son
and make you fucking watch.
- Oi!
[blows landing]
- Don't, no, no, no, no, no...
Just let her go.
- I could never hit a
woman, but I can shoot one.
- Get him Dad! Go on, get him!
[dramatic music]
No, just let him go, please!
[heavy breathing]
You could come with.
- Trust me.
- Why don't you curse?
- Leave him, just
leave him alone.
- 'Cause he was a good person.
- You're a fucking idiot
who never figured out
that all these flashy moves
are better on a chorus line.
This is the job.
[music intensifies]
- Leave him, just
leave him alone...
- Oh, for fuck's sake.
It's over.
[intense music]
[heavy breathing]
- You okay?
- Yeah, you?
- Just gimme a minute.
Come on, come on, let's go.
[waves crashing]
- Oh, shit.
[intense music]
- Wait there.
- All I wanna know is
where the bearer bonds are.
Huh? And then we can go home.
Ah, give it up for the
fuckin' agent girl.
The tenacity on you, wow.
You know what you need to
do is come work for me.
- You'd love that, wouldn't you?
- I would love that, yeah.
- Yeah.
- Now, none of your
tricks, you hear me?
- What are you gonna do, Rory?
- Bearer bonds, where are they?
- They're lost to you now,
they're with the government.
- Well then, I guess it
ends here now, doesn't it?
- Yeah, guess so.
[intense music]
This one goes
out to all of us
Especially those of
us who are wrestling
With doubts and
fears and maybe have
Lost sight of the passion
of who we really are
Life is not about what
we can't or should do
It's about what we
can and could do
You know what I mean
Don't let the negativity
and cynicism in the world
Dampen your precious spirit
Because your candle
could be the spark
That lights up the world
[speaking foreign language]
- Well, it was minimal.
I mean, not to denigrate
the Maltese government,
but it was one of our own
who put this all together.
Agent Fleming, damn
fine work Agent Fleming.
- Fuck you, Miranda.
Fuck you very much.
- Did you just...
- You're welcome.
- I, we're live, we're live.
- Sorry.
Searching for the
meaning of reality
Waiting on the
moment of clarity
Struggling to see the
biggest scenery is down to me
Need assistance
Trust your highest self
to overcome resistance
Negativity will keep
it at a distance
Happiness the product
of persistence
Of love
Be open
Choosing your
experience of evolution
Seek to get in touch
with your perfection
Hell is just a
figment of religion
It ain't real
Forgive yourself
Be assured that sincerely
you've done nothing wrong
But life begins at the
edge of your comfort zone
Relax in the knowledge
that you're not alone
We're all human
Have the courage to be
the human you wanna see
Who are you
Make it your goal to be
at peace with your soul
Who are you
It's time to decide to
free the hero inside
Who are you
In spite of what they tell
you, I think you'll find
Fear is the enemy
of all mankind
Politicians and the media
inciting mass hysteria
Beware of them
telling you beware
It may seem unclear we
always judge more in fear
The best position
by far, we're free to
choose who we are
Just by thinking
it, knowing it
Doing it, being it
The inspiration
we want to be
Be a bringer of life
Be a star shining bright
Be a calmer of fears
Be a healer of tears
Be a savior of hope
Help the hopeless to cope
Be generous to extreme
A fulfiller of dreams
Be a beacon love
Be a force from above
Be your own Jedi knight
Against depression we fight
Be unstoppable,
do the impossible
Be authentic and true
The best possible you
It ain't easy
It ain't easy
It ain't easy
You're gonna make it, baby
You can be who you wanna be
[festive music playing]
Happy and free, believe
We can have it everyday
In any way
You can be who you wanna be
Follow the dream
Be true
It's no lie,
believe me when I
Say I believe in you
You can be who you wanna be
Happy and free
We can have it everyday
In any way, believe
You can be who you wanna be
Follow the dream
Be true
It's no lie,
believe me when I
Say I believe in you
Be happy and free, yeah
[instrumental music]
You gotta believe
I know it ain't easy
You gotta believe
You gotta believe
I know it ain't easy
You gotta believe
- Excuse me, how dare you?
I saw you flirting
with those girls.
- Flirting, I wasn't flirting.
- Are you kidding me?
- They were being friendly.
We were being friendly.
- We're supposed
to be on holiday
and you're flirting
with everything.
- No, we're having a good time.
- No we're not.
Are you kidding me?
I saw you.
- Sorry, gotta take this.
- No, don't do that.
Don't you dare!
You gotta believe