The Last Sharknado: It's About Time (2018) Movie Script

[ orchestra playing ]
- [ groans ]
That was one hell
of a ride, son.
Gil, where are you?!
- Hi, Dad.
Sorry I couldn't join you.
Traveling through time
is complicated.
The energy is so complex
and unstable,
you can only loop back
through time once.
Now it's up to you.
I installed a time capacitor
in my wings.
It's preprogrammed to take you
to the places I--[ static ]
You must destroy
the First Sharknado
and every--[ static ]
You need a velocity
of 88 miles per hour
to activate the time vortex
in the wings
to make the next jump.
Good luck, Dad. Semper paratus.
- Oh, no, April.
Where's the bag?
April?! April?!
Oh, boy.
Hey, get away from that!
So we're gonna do this
the hard way, huh?
Come back here!
Give me that!
Give it back!
Give it back!
What are you looking at?
- [ snarling ]
- Oh. Hi.
- [ roars ]
[ snarls ]
- Ah, maybe not.
- Yaah!
- [ roars ]
[ Fin grunts ]
Come on. Give it back.
Come on. Come on.
Now you're just pissing me off.
- [ yelling ]
[ grunting ]
[ panting ]
- This is mine.
- Hi, Fin.
- You're dead.
- No, you're late.
- Yabba dabba doo--
[ grunting ]
Hey, Fin.
- Bryan?
- Welcome to prehistoric times.
Long way from
the Mets Stadium, my friend.
- You're dead, too.
- Nope.
- Look, I know this is
extremely confusing,
but we're all very much alive.
- That's the amazing thing
about time travel.
Sometimes you're here.
Sometimes you're there.
Sometimes you're stuck in 1955,
and your mom's trying
to make out with you
at the Enchantment
Under the Sea dance.
- Anyway, uh, we've been
waiting for Gil to bring back
- the final member of our gang.
- Gang?
- We're not officially a gang.
It's hard to source
matching outfits.
- Who else is here?
[ pterosaur screeches ]
April on a dinosaur. Huh.
- Come on. We gotta go.
- Fin!
- Is it really you, April?
- Yes, it's me.
- You're not a robot?
- No, I'm not a robot.
Why would I be a robot?
I mean, my hand, but...
- But, baby, you died.
- Gil saved me right before
the space shuttle hit.
Our son saved my life.
- He saved all of our lives,
pulled us
from different points in time,
and sent us back here.
- We've been here for a year
waiting for you.
- Time travel needs work,
but we're here.
- An entire year?
- I thought
I'd never see you again.
But I have
to tell you something.
I did learn
how to fly a dinosaur.
- [ shrieks ]
- Her name is Ptera.
- Because she's a pterodactyl.
Nova: Technically, Pteranodon.
She has a tail.
- So if you're all here,
does that mean Gil's here, too?
- No. Turns out you can
only go back into time once,
- Oh, yeah. That explains why
he disappeared when we landed.
- But why here?
- To do what we do best,
save the world.
- And to stop
the First Sharknado.
- Gil said if we stop
the First Sharknado,
we can stop them all.
- It's like
a big game of dominos.
One sets off another and another
and another and another
until you just got a big mess.
Dominos sucks.
- The world was
already destroyed once.
I don't see
how we can make it much worse.
- We could mess with time
so we don't exist.
Bryan: Look at it this way.
We're already kinda dead
as it is,
so this is a bonus round.
A-And by the way, Fin,
I know you've been eaten
by a lot of sharks
and you've survived,
but I've actually been
eaten and pooped out
by a lot of dinosaurs,
'cause they couldn't digest me.
It's--It's been rough.
- Hand me the capacitor.
Fin: It's in these wings.
Gil programmed it for us.
Nova: Your kid's awesome.
[ dinosaurs grunting ]
- [ objects falling ]
- Incoming!
Fin: Look out!
- Yeah, like the ones
that kill the dinosaurs.
April: The meteors are gonna
kill us if we don't get
out of this time period.
Bryan: Fin, look!
- There it is...
the First Sharknado.
I'm gonna need
a bigger chainsaw.
We're running out of time.
- Fin, I hope
you have a backup plan!
- We'll figure it out.
We always do.
This won't be any different.
We'll use the meteorites
to kill the Sharknado.
- Yeah, that sounds easy.
- If we do this right,
they'll act like the bombs
we used to blow up the Sharknado
in Los Angeles.
- We're going for a ride.
- First time ever
on a pterodactyl?
- Yeah!
- Scared?
- Hell, no.
- Whoa!
- Nova: Get down!
- [ all grunting, yelling ]
- Bryan: Whoa.
Nova: There it is, dead ahead!
Hit the meteorites
into the Sharknado!
April: Everyone,
move to the left!
Ptera, hit the fireball!
Fin: There's more! [ grunts ]
April: It's not working!
We need bigger ammo!
Bryan: We need
a bigger explosion!
- I'll be right back!
- April: Fin, no!
- Nova: What are you doing?
Bryan: He's being Fin!
- Fin!
- Fin!
- Fin!
- Fin!
- April, try to stay
close to him!
- Do you want me to steer?
- No!
- No!
- It's feeding time.
- Come on!
You've got this, Fin! Let's go!
- Let's go!
- Gil! Gil, it's your dad!
- Gil!
- Gil!
- You got this! Come on!
Gil's safe!
That meg's gonna explode!
[ Fin yells ]
Bryan, batter up!
- [ cheering ]
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
- Whoo!
Nova: It's working!
- The Sharknado's disappearing!
- It's a Timenado.
- Let's do the time warp again.
- First Sharknado destroyed.
You did it!
- [ laughs ]
April: But where are we?
Is that a castle?
- Holy cosmos.
- Do it! Come on!
Get in there! Pull!
You bore me!
- Go.
- [ peasants wailing ]
Next. Seriously?
This is the guy?
This is the chosen one?
You're doing
such a good job, honey.
[ Ptera screeches ]
- Look! A dragon!
- The dragon is going
to eat us all!
- Run!
- [ screeches ]
- Nailed it.
- [ screaming ]
[ Ptera shrieks ]
- It is time.
- Gil's gotta be here somewhere.
- Ptera's okay.
- Ah, I told you
I should have steered.
Well, in case
you didn't notice,
we did bring a pterodactyl
back into the 21st century.
Just saying,
maybe not our greatest idea.
Why are you looking at me like
you've never seen me before?
It's me, Bryan.
- Not exactly, Bryan.
I think some things
got mixed up when we jumped.
- What?
- Let's talk about this later.
We got bigger problems
right now.
Who's shooting arrows at us?
- We did what Gil said.
We stopped the First Sharknado.
We should be home.
- Ah, this isn't home.
Something's not right.
Hey! Hey, you!
- Don't hurt me!
- Frodo!
- Take everything! Don't use
your evil sorcery on me!
Fin: Well, that decides it.
We're definitely not home.
Huh. Let's get
some of these clothes on
so we can blend in.
Someone's coming.
- Halt! You are the prisoners
of the magnificent Morgana.
- Okay, everybody.
I got this.
- I'm sure you think
what you have to say
is very important.
Now kneel before Morgana!
- Uh, how 'bout a joke?
- Mwah.
- We're not the enemy.
- You speak of an alliance,
yet a dragon lay here
before you.
- Be careful, Fin!
- Fin!
- Stop! Morgana!
Put down your weapons,
by order of the King.
- Ugh. Those wretched words.
I put a hex on you and you
and you and especially you,
you cacafuego.
- Oh, don't be such a brat.
- Byeeee.
- Everyone,
you should come with me.
It's far too dangerous here.
Come on.
Quickly. You must come
and meet my master.
Your arrival
has been prophesized.
- This looks
like Sharknado weather.
- No, I thought we got rid
of the Sharknados.
- Yeah, we also
thought we were home.
- Hurry!
Welcome to Merlin's castle.
- Nova, look.
- You bear the mark
of the house of Shepard.
- I am a Shepard.
- [ gasps ] My lord.
- This is Gil's handwriting.
I've seen this before.
Sir Gil is quite the artist.
- These are the same drawings
that are under Stonehenge.
- Merlin shall explain all.
- Be still!
- Merlin,
allow me to introduce--
- Sir Gil Shepard's parents.
- I will go and fetch him
and tell him that the family
he's been searching for
all these years
has finally found him instead.
Merlin: Your son trained with me
for the past 10 years.
- He's been here for 10 years?
- I must confess he's taught me
more than I've taught him.
- Fin, look! This is
the Einstein-Rosen bridge.
[ tapping parchment ]
And this right here,
it's a wormhole.
- How do you know that?
- Because I'm a physics teacher,
which is why Gil chose me,
because I know things.
Okay. The key is high velocity,
which means really fast,
high, spinning winds!
- A tornado.
- Yes.
That could be the key to Gil
unlocking the bridge. A-plus.
- And make traveling
through time possible.
- Gil! Master Gil!
Come back!
Your parents have arrived!
- [ muffled ]
Danger! Sharknado forming!
- What's in that bag?
- We'll deal with this later.
- You've had an unhealthy
obsession with that bag
ever since
we destroyed the dinosaurs.
- Yeah, seriously,
what's in this bag?!
[ head grunts ]
Really, Fin? Be more careful.
- You're in love
with a robot head.
- Ow.
- Is this me?
- That was all
that was left of you
after the Earth was destroyed.
You sacrificed yourself
trying to save me.
It's not real.
It's a robot.
- So I was just a head
in the future?
- I didn't want you
to find out this way.
- That hurts.
- Ow!
- Head: Ow!
- Maybe she can help us.
Her technology might be
able to help get us back home.
Head: I hope that hurt!
- See, now there's
gonna be a throw-down,
- because that head is jealous.
- Ow!
- I didn't want to scare you.
That's why I hid it from you.
- It's okay.
I forgive you.
- But don't lie to me anymore.
- I won't.
- But I'm holding on to her now.
- My lord, we must take shelter.
- Where's my son?
- I saw him sailing out to sea,
and then suddenly there were
sharks falling out of the sky.
- I knew this wasn't over
that easy.
Fin: Gil's heading
right into that Sharknado.
- Wait. Stop.
- Nova, get out of the way.
- We gotta let him go.
If he sees you,
- he'll keep looking for you.
- That's exactly what we want.
- But if he reunites
with you now,
he'll stop searching for you,
and then you probably
won't even exist in the future.
We could all cease to exist.
I know you're too emotional
right now to see
the big picture, but take
a second to think about it.
What's making Gil
travel through time?
- To be with us.
- And if he finds us,
he'll stop looking for us.
- Your son is already
disrupting space-time.
Who knows what'll happen
if anyone else
gets caught up in that thing?
- And the Sharknados
are coming this way.
Fin: Then we have
to do something about it.
- Follow me.
Morgana: I'm back!
- Morgana.
- Oh, my gosh.
Winter, how are you?
You still look so...
Let's face it. I'm a 10,
and you're like a 1392.
- I thought Merlin had sent you
to the land of the undead.
- They were full. Can I come in?
- Absolutely not.
- Get out of their way!
There's a Sharknado coming.
- Exactly.
Listen, your silly belief
in science
is not strong enough
to stop what's coming.
I have magic on my side
and a potion
that can stop those sharks,
so if you let me work with you,
we can get this done
quickly and easily.
All I want in return is for you
to use your science
to release Excalibur.
Magic has no sway
over such a powerful tool.
- All right, Morgana.
We accept your deal.
- Great.
Let's go kill some sharks.
Wearing that?
You're going to need to look
a little less needy
and a little more knighty.
- The end is nigh!
- Run!
- [ yelling ]
- If you're gonna do
that hocus-pocus stuff,
now's the time.
Morgana: Stand back.
This is a she-mergency.
- What happened?
What did you do?
- What I always do, win.
- Dragon sharks?
- Good luck with that. Byeee!
- Shark kebob.
- I have a plan.
You, go to Camelot,
and you help save the castle.
I will meet you there.
- The Devil has come back!
- Come on!
- [ screams ]
- Get out of the way!
- [ yelling ]
- Thank goodness
you're still here.
I didn't think
this was how I'd meet my end.
[ screams ]
- Here. Pull the lever.
- Load the catapult.
- All right.
Here's the ammunition.
- Here! Use this!
Release the catapult!
- Freedom!
Nova: Fin, we need
something more powerful
to destroy the Sharknado!
Fin: I have an idea.
- Why not?
- Wait!
Only a man who is worthy
can pull the sword
from the stone.
This is my birthright.
[ chorus vocalizing ]
- Nova: Get down!
- Oh, no.
Aah! I'm melting!
- [ sighs ]
- Oh, my.
Woman: Oh, thank the Lord!
Thank the Lord!
Head: Hey! Window
for time jump is closing!
T-minus five minutes,
57 seconds.
- She wants us to time jump.
We need speed.
- Oh, yeah.
- Oh, no.
- Come on. Come on.
Take it easy, Frodo.
Sorry about the clothes.
Soldier: Lower!
Fin: Release it!
- Cor, blimey!
April: We're not
going fast enough.
- Who needs science
when you have a dragon?
[ laughs ]
- [ screaming ]
- [ townspeople yelling ]
- [ Bryan groans ]
Fin: You all right, April? Nova?
- Bryan, you all right?
- Nova: Yeah, I'm okay.
- My back's
been hurting for years,
- but it feels pretty good now.
- Bryan, you're back.
- What?
- You're no longer a woman.
Nova: Are you telling us you
don't remember being a woman?
- No.
- It's the consequences
of time travel.
- So let me get this straight.
Every time we jump,
everything changes?
- Time travel's risky.
If we do it right,
we can reset everything
back to the way it should be.
- But what if we do it wrong?
- But what if this is wrong,
and that was right?
- We'll talk about it later.
We gotta find out
where we landed,
and we gotta find Gil. Come on.
- The British are coming!
The British are coming!
The British are coming!
The British are coming!
- My lord, we'll never
make it through this storm.
- Hmm. Maybe we could use it
to our advantage.
- The sharks are coming!
The sharks are coming!
The sharks are coming!
The sharks are coming!
The sharks are coming!
- That Sharknado
might be miles away,
but if it gets any closer,
we're all in trouble.
- What if Gil
unleashed a Sharknado
during the Revolutionary War
by accident?
- Then there'd be no revolution.
Soldiers: Move! Move! Move!
- Go!
- Let's go! Let's go!
- Then America wouldn't exist.
- Then we wouldn't exist.
Come on!
I tell you,
you're making a mistake.
We're on your side.
We're Americans.
I wanna speak
to who's in charge.
It's a matter
of life and death.
- Crinkum crankum!
Settle down! Settle down!
- Benjamin Franklin, sir,
we found this group
outside the docks.
They claim to be allies.
- Thank you,
Private Jebediah Clarke.
- Are you the Jebediah Clarke?
- Yes, I am.
- What? I can't say hi
to my great-great-great-
Give or take a great or two.
- No.
- Now who are you,
and what is this all about?
- We need to use
your cannons, sir.
- Our cannons?
This is
General George Washington,
not some delivery service
for tea and crumpets.
- Come out and play!
- The British are throwing
flying sharks at us!
- And they're gonna succeed
next time, too,
unless you listen to us.
We can help you beat the British
and the sharks, too.
- D-Don't just stand there.
Go in. Go in.
- Give me that.
This is a weapon
from the future.
It's got technology
you wouldn't understand.
- General Washington.
- I've been told the British
have an army of sharks
and you have
a plan to stop them.
- It's called a Sharknado,
and, no, the British
don't control it.
- If I remember
my history correctly--
and I'm a history teacher,
which makes me
uniquely qualified--
you got a bunch of cannons
lined up out here
from Fort Ticonderoga.
- We can use those cannons
to destroy the Sharknado
and kill the sharks.
Guard: The Captain, sir.
- Come on in.
- Washington.
- Hamilton.
- Washington.
- Hamilton.
- Washington.
- Hamilton?
You know, I'm still trying
to get tickets to your musical.
Really hard to get.
- Wait. Who the hell is this?
- Sir, you already have
your artillery in place.
Let us show you
where to position 'em.
- I don't want
to tell you this, but, uh,
we're from the future.
- We really have no time.
Take them away,
and politely,
but firmly shoot them.
- All right, how 'bout this?
You, General Washington...
are on the $1.00 bill. See?
- [ chuckling ]
- Lucky you.
- My--[ laughs ]
Hamilton, you got one, too?
[ laughs ] I doubt it.
- Look, the more we stand here
and argue about it,
the more time the Sharknado has
to destroy your harbor
and conquer your troops,
and then we all lose the war.
- General Washington,
a fact about your past--
in 1743, your father died
when you were just 11 years old,
and then a little bit later,
you went to Barbados
and contracted smallpox.
But, Mr. Hamilton,
you were an orphan,
but about 240 years from now,
you become
a really great singer. Good job.
- How do you know all this?
- Because I'm a history teacher,
damn it,
and you are my history,
- What's it gonna be?
- Hamilton, I think we need
to give our new allies
all the cannons they need.
We have a Sharknado to defeat.
- We need more ammunition!
- Fire!
- Shoot at the tornado!
- Hey! Hey, let me help you!
- Go away.
- I'm not taking no
for an answer.
- Take this.
- Okay.
- Yes!
- Yes!
- Okay.
- Thank you.
- I know you--
I know it's gonna
probably make me sound
crazy and all, but--
- No, I know you're crazy,
but I still like you.
- Okay.
Yeah, okay.
- Here you go, sir!
- All right, listen up!
We gotta fire the cannons
all at once.
We gotta time 'em
with a lightning strike.
If we do that,
all the cannonballs
will become electrified
and will go into the Sharknado,
and it'll blow up
all the sharks.
- Look, I've faced down
more of these Sharknados
than I care to remember.
There's no time
to stop and think
about the madness of it all.
You just have to do it.
We're not fighting
for just our country.
We're fighting
for all of humanity.
Now who's with me?!
Just load the cannons!
- Ready the cannons!
- Oh, God.
- Hiya! [ yelps ]
- It's a full count,
bottom of the ninth.
Nova: All right,
locked and loaded!
- 3, 2, 1...
- Retreat! Retreat!
- [ cheering ]
- God bless America.
- The British are retreating.
Suck it, you redcoat ninnies!
- Where's Nova?
April: She was walking
into town with Private Clarke.
- Drinks for all.
Drinks for all.
Fin: You two figure out
how to get us some speed.
I'll be right back.
Nova: Here you go.
Thank you so much.
I really appreciate it.
Thank you.
Take care of it.
- That was weird.
- Hold up.
I'll take this from here.
Great job today.
- Let me buy you a drink,
Private Shepard.
- Get the tents rolled up.
- I have a ride for you.
- Driver: Whoa!
- It's not safe for these horses
to come through the portal.
- But I have something
much more powerful in mind.
- Any chance this is a letter
to your grandfather?
- Yeah, as a matter of fact,
there is.
- Do you want to read it, Fin?
- Yeah.
[ sighs ] You're warning him
not to go fishing.
- If he doesn't go to the sea,
there's no way that shark
will kill him. He'll stay alive.
- And you stop fighting sharks,
you don't start
the Sharknado Sisterhood,
and you don't save me
or my family.
- Know what, Fin? It's time
I save my own family, okay?
And by the way,
he might not even get this note.
He's not gonna be born
for two more centuries,
but I had to try.
- No. We can't mess
with destiny.
- M-Mess with destiny?
We just fought
in the American Revolution.
It looks like we're messing
with destiny to me.
- No, we stopped history
from changing
by stopping a Sharknado
so things could stay
the way they are.
Your grandfather
didn't die in a Sharknado.
We can't change his fate.
- Next time we jump,
I might not exist.
And what are the odds
that I ran into my ancestor?
I'll never get
this chance again.
My grandfather raised me,
and I was never the same
after he died,
so I would give anything
to have one more day with him.
- I'm sorry, Nova. We can't.
- [ scoffs ]
- I'm sorry.
- You know what, Fin? I'm sorry.
You can't control me, and you
won't control my destiny.
- I just know
that the energy bolt
is more powerful
than anything else we have,
but I just cannot grab it.
- I know what the problem is.
What we're missing...
is the key.
- Look what Ben gave us,
his carriage.
- Listen up,
you little wig-biters.
Come along. Get you inside.
In you go. In you go. Hello.
- It's been an honor
to meet you.
- This day
will go down in history.
- No doubt.
Bryan, let's go.
- I'm sorry, Fin. I can't.
- What are you talking about?
- You see, this is why
Gil picked you to lead the team.
You're always ready
to run in there
and go fight
the next Sharknado,
but me, I run,
and I just get tired.
Fin, last time I jumped,
I wasn't exactly me.
I can't take
that chance anymore.
- Bryan, you can't stay here.
- I taught history for 25 years.
Now I'm ready to live it.
[ thunder rumbling ]
Be safe.
- I thought you might need
a little extra power
to get back to the future!
- What?
- Well, first we need
to get this kite in the air.
- Get us out of here!
To infinity and beyond!
- [ groans ]
- [ laughing ]
- Awesome, dude!
- Do you think history
will remember this day?
Do you think they'll remember me
for anything
other than this stupid kite?
- No, it's pretty much
just the kite.
- Oh. Toodles.
- Okay, take care, Ben.
Is there any, uh, place
to get a...
taco around here
or anything, or...
- We don't have to do this, son.
You could still surrender
and live.
- Billy the Kid
does not surrender!
Billy: This ain't over yet,
my friend!
- Friend?
Who you calling "friend"?
- Get your hands up, partner.
- They'll arrest all of us
if we get caught, okay?
We have to stay quiet.
- Get along, losers!
We're going shopping!
- I'll take that.
Turn around.
Don't just stand there
like a bunch
of Kansas City showgirls!
Go get him!
I don't know how you
and Billy the Kid pulled off
that carriage
falling out of the sky stunt,
but this sideshow ends today.
- Billy the Kid?
I'm not with Billy the Kid.
- You had his gun.
You helped him get away.
I say you're lying.
You're under arrest.
- You got it all twisted.
- Yeah, I think I know
who's twisted, mister.
No one messes with Sheriff Ron!
- He'll be okay.
- Keep walking.
- Get up slowly.
- Skye?
- April?
- [ grunts ]
- Tried that already. No use.
- Are you with Billy the Kid?
- He's my ride out of here.
- [ sighs ] Well, if he
comes to break you out,
take me with you.
- Safer in here.
Weather's changing.
- You don't know the half of it.
- What are you in for, mister?
- Just trying to put
my family back together.
- Story of my life.
- I hope you're
ready to rock, boy.
All right, blondie. [ sighs ]
Time to go.
- Wait.
Where's Billy?
- Oh, he ran like
the coward he is. Come on.
- Hey, where are you taking him?
- It's judgment day.
This boy's gonna meet his maker.
- Good luck finding your family!
- Oh, are those your last words?
- No. Semper paratus.
- Oh, shut up.
- Gil, it's Dad!
Gil, it's Dad!
- Howdy, Deputy.
I do declare
I'm new around here,
but I think I found this man.
He looked real suspicious,
and I think he had a gun.
- Hey, Fin!
- Skye.
- Need a lift?
Here. Put these on.
Surprised to see me?
- Not really, not after
what I've been through.
- [ chuckles ] You know
I always got your back.
- Well, you did
kinda die in New York.
- Well, I was in New York,
but I didn't die.
- You did kinda die.
- Uh-uh.
I ran into this guy wearing
a freaking shark helmet.
Bam! He put me back here
to save your butt.
- That was my son Gil,
and he's here.
- Sheriff: Dead man walking.
- There he is.
- Not for long.
Fin: I screwed up.
- How?
- [ sighs ] Billy the Kid
was supposed to rescue Gil,
but he can't.
When we landed in town,
we changed that, and he left.
Gil's gonna hang.
- Let me go, Fin.
I'll rescue him
like he rescued me.
- No, you can't.
If he recognizes us,
he won't rescue us.
He knows you.
The future Gil knows me.
Trust me.
- If you're looking for someone
to save you, son, stop.
- That's Gil.
- Bad weather's coming.
[ thunder rumbling ]
I'd take cover if I were you.
- Bag him.
Citizens of Santa Mira Ridge,
once again, I hand out justice
to those who break the law
in my town.
We must uphold our laws,
instill order, not chaos.
Let this man's punishment
be the exception, not the rule.
This is our life.
This is our town.
[ wind blowing ]
[ Nova sighs ] Looks like
we have more problems.
- Storm's a-coming!
- Take cover!
- What is going on?
- Run to the hills!
- Hang him.
- Yippee-ki-yay.
- [ gunshot ]
- [ horse neighs ]
- What the hell's
going on in my town,
and who cut that boy loose?!
[ Gil coughing ]
- Get up. Come on.
Get up. I got you.
I got you.
- Who are you?
Did Billy send you?
- No. Don't worry about Billy.
Worry about that Sharknado.
- You know about Sharknados?
- I also know
everything there is
to know about you, Little Gil.
You parents are waiting for you
on the other side of that storm.
Now you go save me
so I can save you,
so you can save your parents,
and we can save the world, okay?
- Who are you?
- I'm Skye,
a chocolate blast from the past.
Now go, kid! Go! Go!
- Go ahead. Shark my day.
- Deputy Richie! Deputy Richie!
What happened?!
Son of a bitch.
[ gunfire ]
You're supposed to be in jail!
- You're shooting at my son.
- Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
I'm not gonna take this anymore.
[ melodic scream ]
- One shark!
- [ gunshot ]
- Two shark!
Red shark!
Blue shark!
- Gil! Gil!
[ train whistle blows ]
Woman: The train is leaving!
- Why are there fish
falling from the sky?!
- Don't worry about that.
Just get to the train!
- Oh, my God.
- [ alarm beeps ]
- Head: Hey! Hey!
- Where's that sound
coming from?
- What is that? Your bag.
- I can help.
Point me toward the storm.
Activating lasers.
- I didn't know I could do that.
- I think your head
is fueled by a nuclear core.
- Where are the girls?
- They're coming.
- Fin: The Sharknado's dying.
- That's a good thing, right?
- Great, but we need
speed to time jump.
- What happens if we miss it?
- Then we're stuck here forever.
- What?
- Come on. We'll figure it out.
- [ groans ]
- Going somewhere, slick?
- I don't have time for this.
- Time? Ha ha!
You know, it's a funny thing
you mentioning time,
'cause apparently I have
all the time in the world.
- What are you talking about?
- Don't you look at me funny.
I ain't stupid.
That cowboy was from the future,
and he promised me
if I rescue him,
he was gonna take me with him.
- You can't go
into the future, Billy.
- You think you're gonna go
to the future instead of me?
Me! Billy the Kid! [ laughs ]
- I already been there
and done it.
- What if I take your place?
The future is ripe
for robbing. Ha ha!
- She did it.
Now let's go find Fin and Skye.
- Let's go!
- The vortex is collapsing.
- Get out of the way!
- Prepare to draw.
- Really? We're doing this?
- Mm-hmm.
[ screams ]
[ gunfire ]
I ain't dead yet!
Ha ha ha!
- You're dead now.
Kind of gross. Hey.
- All right,
that train's our only chance.
We gotta get in it.
Come on. Let's go.
- Go!
- Come on!
Reach! [ grunting ]
Come on. Come on.
[ groaning ]
- Hurry. This train
isn't fast enough.
- I'm gonna unhook some cars.
- You can do that?
- Yeah. Runs in the family.
You're the conductors now.
- You got it.
- Careful.
- [ grunting ]
- He better hurry up.
We're getting close.
- [ grunting ]
- [ yells ]
[ wings sputter ]
- [ yelling ]
- [ surf guitar playing ]
- Whoo! Surf's up!
[ singers harmonizing ]
- How do you do, everyone?
This is Rand McDonald,
reporting live from the beaches
of Santa Monica, California,
where people are literally
doing the shark,
a dance craze
that's number one with a bullet,
a bullet to the head.
- [ grunts ]
Well, that sucked.
April: Fin!
[ thunder crashing ]
- [ gasps ]
- We gotta go warn those people.
Come on.
- [ cheering ]
- Thank you. We're Quint.
- Tornado!
- Shark!
- Sharknado!
- [ crowd screaming ]
- Run! Go! Go!
- Run!
- Move! Move! Move!
- You guys, go!
- Paulie, look out!
- [ yells ]
- [ screaming ]
- [ yells ]
Surf's up.
- Go! Go!
- Ahh! Ugh!
- Oh, no! You okay?
- I'm okay.
- Skye, you got him?
Get him some help.
Come on. Come on.
[ beam zapping ]
- Hurry!
- [ screams ]
- Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! A shark!
- The shark's coming!
- [ screams ]
- Hey! Hey!
You're Rand McDonald from TV!
You're Rand McDonald!
I'm on-- I'm on TV!
Baba booey!
- It's a...
- Mommy!
- [ yelps ]
- Let's go.
- Keep it up, Gilly!
- You got it, Raye! [ groans ]
- You know what that means.
- They're my parents.
- Get out of our way, big feet,
or we'll fry you.
Raye: The professor made it.
- Why are you trying to destroy
that Sharknado?
- Sharknado?
How do you know that name?
April: Do you know
a guy named Gil?
- The professor?
- Blond hair, blue eyes,
- shark fin helmet?
- Raye: Wait. Do you know him?
- Yeah. He's our son.
- You mean more like
your father, right?
- He must have got older.
- How do you two dweebs
know so much?
- He's trying to get
in the vortex to time travel.
- Oh, dear.
- Fin, look.
I think this is
the prototype of the--
- The capacitor.
- Look at the date.
- Isn't that the date
from when the first Sharknado
hit Santa Monica?
- Yeah. That's where
we're going to next.
- Hurry!
- [ yelling ]
- Now listen. We gotta stop
all this jibber-jabbering
and 86 that Sharknado
before we all become fish food.
- Let's get the big gun.
- Let's do it.
Hope JPL doesn't
find out I borrowed this.
I need your help
to stabilize it.
All right, everybody hold on.
Raye: The professor told us
to destroy it
- after he got through.
- Now!
- It's gone!
- We did it!
- Yeah!
- We did it!
- Yes!
- We did it!
April: It's gone.
- I've got it.
We can still make the jump.
- Jump? What jump?
- Fin, this prototype
isn't as advanced,
but I can program the date,
but we can make this work.
I can make it work.
I just need--I need speed.
- Gilly, what about
that sweet ride you just got?
- Oh, she's a beaut, huh.
A brand-new Cadillac El Dorado.
- Great! We'll take it! Yes.
- I'm taking the capacitor.
I'm gonna make some adjustments.
- Raye: Wait.
- Come on.
You look so familiar.
Did we go
to high school together?
- I would have remembered that.
- [ laughs ]
I'm Raye Martin.
- Fin.
- Hi, Fin.
- And I'm Gilly, Gilly Shepard.
Nice to meet you.
- Look, I know this is
gonna sound crazy,
but the professor
used that capacitor
to move into the future,
but there's not gonna be
any future
unless we meet him there.
- You're from the future?
- Okay, future boy,
tell us something
that hasn't happened yet.
- Yeah.
- You two fall in love.
- What?
[ both laugh ]
- Here you go, son.
- Thanks, Dad.
- Oh, wait. Button up.
It's getting cold.
- Good luck!
- If we ever have kids one day,
I just hope
they don't turn out like that.
- [ laughs ]
That would be weird, yeah.
- Whoo!
- You got the capacitor set?
- Yep, back to Santa Monica,
just like Gil said.
- Santa Monica, here we come.
- I have an extra ticket
to the Spice Girls concert.
Do you want to go, or are
you gonna go see "Titanic"
for the tenth time?
- Nova, what did you do?
- Why are we in San Francisco?
- This doesn't concern you, Fin.
- Doesn't concern me?
What do you think you're doing?
- What I'm doing? We've been
interfering with everything.
And who do you think
you are, anyway?
You wouldn't let me
send a note to my grandfather,
yet you didn't think twice
about when Bryan stayed behind
during the Revolutionary War,
did you?
And what about hanging out
with your parents?
Just leave me alone, okay?
This is my story now.
You saved your family,
and now I'm saving mine.
- Nova--
- There's nothing you can do
to stop me, okay?
- What's that girl up to?
- She brought us back to 1997
so she could prevent
her grandfather
from being killed by a shark.
- I want to catch
a big fish today.
- And you will.
- I brought my lucky lure.
- Well, then it's gonna be
your lucky day, Nova.
- Quit calling me that, Grandpa.
My name is Jenny Lynn.
- You shine way too bright
for that name.
- Like a star?
- Exactly, like a little nova.
- Wow. You look cool.
- Not as cool as you look.
- I'm Jenny Lynn.
- That's a pretty name.
- But you can call me Nova.
- Oh.
Hey, do you have room
for one more?
- That'll be 20 bucks.
Ah, forget about it. I--
My charter boat.
I'll cover you.
Just catch a big fish.
- Thank you.
- Hope she does the right thing.
Hey, you got room
for three more?
- That'll be 60 bucks.
You got any poles?
- Got it right here.
- Okay, guys,
we shove off in five minutes.
- Darn. I lost another one,
and I didn't even
feel the fish bite.
- Use this one, Grandpa.
- Okay.
All right, now, when you
get a fish on your line
and you feel it, you gotta
keep your line taut, okay?
- Okay, Grandpa.
- Okay, Grandpa.
- [ laughs ]
- Have you really thought out
what you're about to do?
- I have the chance to give
that little girl a real future.
Any minute now,
this ship will crash,
leaving my grandfather
and everyone else onboard
as food for a school
of bloodthirsty sharks.
Don't tell me that if this
wasn't April, Claudia, Matt,
or Gil, that you wouldn't insist
that I help you save them.
- I don't think you realize
what we all have at stake here.
I've had to watch my son
grow up in time without me.
Do you know what that's like?
Do you know how many times
I thought about just...
not going forward,
staying back like Bryan did?
If we're successful,
everything resets...
Gil disappears...
disappears from my heart
and from my mind,
because he's never existed.
Nova, you said it yourself.
It's bigger than us.
- That's not fair.
That little girl...
I need my Grandpa, Fin.
- I know.
- Okay, everybody.
Let's get out there
and get some big ones.
- I see you're admiring
a family heirloom.
That's been handed down
generation to generation
since the Civil War.
- Revolutionary War.
- What?
- Oh, nothing.
- You know,
it's a bit of a superstition,
but I've kept it onboard
as a good luck charm.
It's where my granddaughter
gets her name.
What are we doing
standing around?
Come on!
We want to fish, right?
Let's get some lines
in the water!
There's some big ones out there.
- Nova, everything you are,
everything you fight for
is driven by this moment.
- And if this moment
doesn't happen,
if your grandpa doesn't die,
everything could change.
- Okay. Okay.
You know what?
You're right.
I get it now. I understand.
Stop this boat!
You have to turn
this boat around.
- Nova!
- Please. I-It's an emergency.
- I need you to get out of here.
- Look, at some point today...
- Don't pay any attention
to her. I'm so sorry about this.
- ...sink and then
the sharks are--
- I'm really
just a retired doctor.
I really shouldn't
be piloting this thing.
- Can you alert a Coast Guard?
- A shark.
- Shark!
- Shark!
- Come on, Nova.
- Hey, what's that?
- What? Where?
- Sharks in the water!
- Nova!
- Abandon ship!
- [ screams ]
- I caused this? I'm the reason
my grandfather died.
- Come on! I'm not gonna let
your grandfather die this time!
- Go! Go! Take her in the raft!
Hurry up!
My friend will save you!
- Okay, get her in the raft.
- My name is Nova Clarke.
You killed my grandfather.
Prepare to die! [ grunting ]
- Hold on, Nova. You're gonna be
all right. Help is on the way.
- Keep Nova safe.
- Hey, you guys coming?
- We'll catch up.
- [ yelling ]
[ screaming ]
April: Nova!
Grab my hand! Come on!
Nova: Aah! April!
- Come on, Nova!
- Help!
- [ yells ]
- No!
- [ both screaming ]
- Help!
- [ screams ]
- Every time
I try and fix something,
it just makes things worse,
and people die again.
I can't control the future.
- You're right.
You can never
control the future.
All you can do
is control your choices,
and now we need
to do the right thing
and finish what we started.
- Where's the capacitor?
- It's right here.
Whitney Houston,
we have a problem.
- Is it broken?
- It keeps adding
too many numbers.
I gotta redirect the router.
- Fin, don't leave me.
- We don't have time for this.
- Even if I can set it
to the right time, we still
don't have enough velocity
to engage the time jump.
- You get that thing fixed.
I'll get us the speed we need.
- Working on it.
- Skye?
- Almost got it.
Almost got it.
- Skye, we don't
got time for this.
- Got it!
- Got it!
- Grab on! Grab on!
[ yelling ]
[ groans ] Eh?
Skye. Come on.
- Oh.
Something's not right.
This is not Santa Monica.
- Come on.
Let's figure out
what we did wrong.
- Damn, it's quiet.
- It's too quiet.
Hey, Skye...
- Something's not right.
- Check the date.
- Are we there?
- Let's just say we overshot it
by a few thousand years.
- 20013?
- I'll reset it
so we can go back.
- No, we can't do that.
- Why not?
We're time travelers.
We can do whatever we want.
- Nah, that's why Gil's not here
with us a second time around.
That thing only offers
a one-way ride.
- [ whoosh ]
- Skye: Oh, boy.
- Watch out.
- What the hell was that?
- Maybe that's
how sharks evolved
over the last 20,000 years.
I can't wait to see
what the humans look like.
- Well, I'll be damned.
- Aprils.
- It's planet of the Aprils.
- We love you, Fin.
- We love you, Fin.
- We love you, Fin.
- We love you, Fin.
- Cute outfits.
- Where are you taking us?
Answer me.
- Clear.
- So this is what happens
when you don't save your wife.
Looks like
a shrine to my past.
- But what's it doing here?
- Wait here.
The Queen is coming.
Hail to the Queen!
Aprils: Hail to the Queen!
- Don't be afraid.
- What do you want from us?
- You.
- You're not April,
not even human.
- Human? [ laughs ]
Why would I want to be human?
You mean like...
- April.
What has she done to you, April?
- What are you doing, huh?
Collecting all this junk
like some Sharknado hoarder?
- When my head fell
off the boat and sank
to the bottom of the ocean,
I lay there for years,
angry that nobody came back
for me, especially you, Fin.
Eventually I was caught
by a fisherman's net.
It took 10,000 years
for me to forgive you
and another 10,000
to create this paradise for us.
- She's alive!
- We needed her DNA
to create this army.
You can't clone a robot, silly.
- How did you go back in time?
Thought this was a one-way trip.
- Power. You could
do anything with power.
I've had centuries
to perfect time travel.
You think you came here
by accident? I brought you here.
- Listen here,
you emotionally deranged
Easy-Bake Oven.
I don't know
what kind of crazy game
you got going on here,
but let me tell you something.
- It is not going to--
- No!
No, no! Hey! Stop!
You're hurting her!
Stop. Please.
- Take her to the exhibition!
- Why are you doing this?
- Your DNA.
Every queen needs a king.
- It's not gonna happen.
- Dad!
- I've missed you so much, Dad.
- Matt.
Mom could make this
a home again.
We can be together forever.
- Come on, Dad.
- Claudia.
- This is what it's all about.
It's about family.
- Fin.
- Nova.
- Listen to April.
We can make this work.
- You're not real.
None of you are real!
- Exactly.
- We're better than human.
- [ together ]
And you can be, too.
- Titanium.
- [ groaning ]
[ groaning ]
- You want to fight me?!
- I don't want to fight you!
- You never stopped loving her!
- And I never will!
- If I can't have you,
then no April can!
- Get away from him, you bitch.
[ groaning ]
[ Fin groans ]
- [ yelling ]
[ April screaming ]
[ Fin groaning ]
- No!
- I do believe we have a deal.
- Salud.
Azzinaro! Ultima red, okay?
- S, Captain Santiago.
We're close.
The pod of 30,000 sharks
is up ahead.
batten down the hatches.
Bring in all the fishing nets.
A storm is coming!
- Dios mo.
[ gasps ] Santiago!
- What is that? An omen?
Throw it away!
- No, don't do that!
- Who are you,
and what are you doing here?
- It's a long story.
We don't have time for it.
- Are you with Palmer
and came to kill me?
- No, I'm trying
to save your life.
That head is nuclear,
and she's really pissed off.
If you don't put it down,
it's gonna be end of the world
as we know it.
- You bring a bomb to my boat?
[ beeping ]
[ yelps ]
Make it stop! Make it stop!
- [ beeping continues ]
- [ grunts ]
- Make it stop.
- [ beeping stops ]
- You came back for me.
- Now take a pick.
Port or starboard?
- [ screams ]
April: Fin, listen to me.
You must destroy this Sharknado.
If it's not stopped,
time will collapse.
All that we know
will explode into nothing.
- I got it.
- Where is your friend
with the head?
- Change of plans, Captain.
I'm gonna take the money,
your cargo,
and what's left of the ship.
[ gunshot ]
[ screaming ]
- All this is your fault for
bringing el diablo to my boat.
- Put down the gun,
or I'm gonna blow up the boat!
- [ laughs ] Why?
- I need your help
to destroy that Sharknado.
April, what's wrong?
April: I need to recharge!
- Okay. We got a deal.
- What's that?
- We shouldn't be afraid
of the sharks.
They are the ones
who should be afraid of us.
- You catch fish with these?
- Sometimes.
[ chorus vocalizing ]
[ chainsaw buzzing ]
- [ yells ]
- [ screams ]
- No!
- [ screams ]
- Fin, my lasers have recharged.
I can finish off
the Last Sharknado!
- Right! The lasers!
- Dad.
- Gil, you're alive! Ahh!
April: Fin, the Sharknado!
- [ gasping ]
- The time vortex
dropped me off here.
We can finish this off.
I need the capacitor.
I can fix this.
We can fix this.
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Semper fidelus.
A Shepard is always loyal.
- You mean, "Semper paratus,
always prepared."
- Of course.
I must have forgotten.
- Who are you?
[ Queen's voice ]
Give it to me!
- No!
- You can't destroy
this Sharknado!
This is our future!
This is our destiny!
Come back with me!
- Never!
- [ laughing ]
April: Fin, grab the capacitor!
Get it!
- April!
- That's mine!
You don't know how to use it!
Give me the capacitor!
- No! Let go!
- Let go!
- I'm not going
anywhere with you!
- We can live forever,
and no one we love
will ever die again!
- Not like this!
- Stop, or you
will destroy time!
- I'll take that chance!
Fin: It's shorting out!
- Let go, or I won't
be able to stop this!
- You are in big trouble
in Little China!
- Oh! Sharks!
- Float like a butterfly, huh?
Sting like a bee, huh?
- Nein!
[ both screaming ]
- Tonight, we dine in hell!
- I must protect you!
- You're coming home with me
so we could live forever!
- Never!
- Bring it on, little sharks!
You're gonna get rocked!
- Great Scott!
- Let them eat cake!
- Lend me your sharks!
- [ screaming ]
- Too late!
I control your fate now!
- [ screams ]
[ machine guns fire ]
- [ groans ]
- Die, shark!
- Fin, it's time to go home!
- Oh, crap.
- [ laughs ]
April: Fin! Move!
- April?!
- Fin, look out!
- [ groans ]
April: Grab my tail!
Time is collapsing,
but there's one thing left
we can do.
- What's that?
- I have a fail-safe button.
If you activate it
in the heart of the storm,
it will self-destruct
It will either repair time
or destroy the universe.
Ready to blow my mind?
- It's time for a reboot.
- See you on the other side.
I love you, Fin Shepard.
- I love you, April.
- This one is on me today,
[ explosion ]
- Did a bomb just go off?
- You know what? I bet they're
testing down at Point Mugu.
I'm gonna call my unit
and find out.
- That's a good idea.
- [ gasps ]
Poor baby.
- "Poor baby"?
- Yeah. I really love sharks.
- Hey, Mom.
You and Dad ready to go?
I have the car packed.
- As soon as your dad
says all his goodbyes.
- Hey, Gemini.
- Baby, what are you
doing on your feet?
You know what the doctor said.
Come on.
- Should you
be giving us free drinks?
It's not your bar anymore.
- Yeah, and I'm not gonna
have anyplace to drink.
- Oh, hey, Fin, thanks again
for the college loan.
I really appreciate it.
Thank you so much.
And you, too, April.
Thank you, guys.
- Don't forget.
I offered to pay you double
if you stayed.
- Okay, this kid needs a name.
- I already have a name.
His name is Gil.
- Baby.
- Oh, I almost forgot.
Grandpa wanted me
to give you this,
in case the baby's born
while he's in space.
- "For the 'little one.'
May he always fly. Dad."
- Hey, everybody, listen up!
- On Election Day,
reach for the sky,
and vote for me.
- We grew up with her.
She's gonna be
the next President.
- God bless America.
- Are you really thinking
about this move to Kansas?
- Yeah, you're not gonna be,
like, a farmer or something,
- Ah, I'll start
some kind of business.
- Like what?
- Maybe
a tree-trimming business.
- I couldn't see you
with a chainsaw.
- Lay 'em on me, bro.
Thank you.
- Don't run it into the ground.
- Yes, sir.
- All right, everybody.
Last round's on me.
- [ cheering ]
- Six years ago,
when I opened up this bar,
things between me and my family
weren't so good.
I had a lot of growing up to do.
But this bar
brought us back together
and made us stronger,
brought us closer
to our friends.
- Yes.
- I'm gonna miss this place,
gonna miss all your faces,
seeing 'em day after day,
year after year.
- [ laughs ]
- I know it hasn't
always been easy,
but through it all,
we fought hard for each other
and stayed true to who we are.
No matter what we faced...
we always looked out
for one another.
So as I--as we...
start this new chapter
in our lives,
I want to raise a glass
to all of you,
because you're my heroes.
To the end of an era,
and to new beginnings.
Semper paratus!
- Semper paratus.
- Semper paratus.
- Hey, hey.
- [ winces ]
- Are you okay?
- [ groans ]
- Has your water broken?
- All right, let's go.
- I think so.
- We're going to the hospital.
- It's time. It hurts.
- Honey, call the hospital.
- April: We gotta go!
- I'll get the car.
- I'll go get the baby bag.
Fin: Come on. Get the door.
Nova: Come on, George.
- All right, now it is time
for your "Today" weather,
and this is one
for the history books,
if not a world record.
There's not a cloud or a storm
on the horizon, so get out.
Enjoy some time with the family
on this beautiful day.
There won't be anything
quite like it again.