The Little Switzerland (2019) Movie Script
NETFLIX PRESENTS
Welcome to Tellera. Today is the day!
Tellera is a Castilian town
located in the heart of the Basque Country
since the Middle Ages.
This peculiar settlement's
culture and idiosyncrasy
are a hundred percent Basque.
But this unwonted situation
will end today.
Lehendakari Txomin Iturraspe
is expected to arrive any second now,
who is going to announce that Tellera
will become a part of the Basque Country.
-Long live Euskadi!
-Hurrah!
-You must be excited, Mr. Mayor.
-Very excited.
It has been nearly 700 years.
But that just goes to show
that we are truly Basque.
Our tenacity, our culture,
because we feel it.
And like you always say,
because of tax benefits.
That's what I'm talking about.
Say all you want, the truth is
we belong to Burgos, just like morcilla.
Sure, especially you.
The fucking half-Swiss Cantabrian.
Cantabria is a recent invention.
Santander was always Old Castile's port.
And I moved to Switzerland
because I had no choice.
It looks like there are differences
of opinion in town, Mr. Mayor.
Just a few. And they're all treated
with tolerance and respect.
Move the Basque flag a little bit
to the right so they can see it better.
Look alive!
And out with the Castilian one!
Where's Nathalie?
Something must've happened to her.
She's always on time.
-Damn it!
-As soon as the lehendakari gets here,
you start waving those flags, okay?
Nathalie, where were you?
-What's up with your hair? What happened?
-Help me.
Put some effort into it!
You gotta look Basque!
Bernab, get rid of the kid
with the Spanish jersey.
Yes.
It doesn't matter
if you get rid of that kid,
-we're still Spaniards.
-Ait, will you let me do my job?
Not "ait." "Dad."
Besides, you're not Basque.
You were born in Switzerland.
We have to arrange these people
before the lehendakari gets here.
-Can I ask--
-Not now.
-Here he comes! He's here!
-The lehendakari!
-It's okay.
-You gotta fix that.
Where's the lehendakari?
They sent Gumucio. This smells fishy.
After all the trouble we went through
to get the press here, they send him.
-He has no authority.
-God damn it!
Let's not panic. Stick to the plan.
Welcome to Tellera.
Antoln Intxausti, mayor of Tellera.
Here to serve God,
the lehendakari and you.
Come on, Mr. Mayor, we know each other.
What's going on here?
Are you celebrating the town fair?
Could I speak to you in private
for a minute?
In private?
What we need to discuss here
is something the entire town
and all of Spain should hear.
Come on.
-Nathalie. I'll be here if there's...
-Cool.
Okay?
-Long live Tellera!
-Hurrah!
-Long live Euskadi!
-Hurrah!
Lehendakari!
The lehendakari couldn't make it today.
But Mr. Gumucio is here as
a representative of the Basque Government
to legalize what we've always known.
That we were, we are,
and will always be Basque.
That we were, we are,
and will always be Basque.
Yes!
Mr. Gumucio will speak now.
Ari, ari, ari, Antoln for lehendakari!
Good morning.
As you all know, the Gasteiz government
-has always asserted the Basqueness...
-Hey! Put that down!
of Tellera.
Well, I wouldn't say always.
Dude, shut up! This is a historic day!
-Tellera!
-Hurrah!
However, I must announce
there has been a small alteration.
We have reached
a profitable economic agreement
with the Government of Castile-Len
to expand Basque companies
in strategic territories
such as Las Batuecas
-or El Bierzo.
-What? You can't do that!
-This is not Castile!
-Here we go again.
-And what's that got to do with us?
-Exactly.
What's that got to do with us?
It means we're still Castilian.
You're so annoying, Revuelta.
You sound like a broken record.
In return for this
extremely profitable agreement
which benefits every one of us,
what the government asks of us is...
that we cease to demand that Tellera
be declared a Basque settlement.
What did he say?
No matter how much you insist,
you will not be Basque.
Sorry, I didn't mean to.
THE LITTLE SWITZERLAND
Moving on to local news.
Tellera, the Castilian settlement
located in the heart of the Basque Country
will receive the visit
of a Basque representative
in order to study the annexation...
TWO HOURS EARLIER
...to this territory
after being a part of Castile...
Shit, that was today?
I bet the town is in an uproar.
I knew it.
We should've gone to Fras.
There's plenty of work there.
Well, I haven't called home in days.
Besides, the Sanctuary of the Dull
is a mile away from the town center.
We won't hear a thing.
Don't even think about it.
Keep your eyes on the road.
I'll read the messages for you.
-Don't you dare look!
-I won't look. Just keep driving.
There's a spot on my glasses.
LONG LIVE EUSKADI
TELLERA
I booked a room at the Lucerna Inn.
What about you?
Are you going to stay at your parents'?
Me? Yeah.
I'll pay them a visit.
Right.
Yolanda, you know you can stay with us
if you want.
Oh, no. No.
-I mean, no offense.
-No.
-I'd rather do my own thing.
-Of course.
Besides, you know how Pancorbo turned out.
We were going to spend a few days there,
but we stayed for two months.
Yolanda, please,
keep your eyes on the road!
Gorka, stop it! You're being sexist.
That's right! That's a sign of sexism.
You can't keep your hand
off that handgrip.
I just don't want us to crash, okay?
So keep your eyes on the road.
-Yolanda, what did I just say?
-It's okay.
-It'll be a second.
-Keep your eyes on the road.
-Give me the phone.
-No way. Don't tell me what--
God.
-Your nose.
-What a blow.
-I'm bleeding out.
-Look at me.
-Is it broken?
-I don't know.
-Is it broken? Red?
-It looks red.
-Do you feel dizzy? Follow my finger.
-No.
-Yolanda, please.
-Look into my eyes.
Are you okay?
Yes. I'm okay.
I'm great.
All right, then.
-If you're okay, let's go.
-Yeah, let's go.
I can't wait for you to meet Mr. Anselmo.
You'll see, he's an amazing person.
A role model. A saint.
What do you think? Pretty cool, huh?
Careful with that, Father.
They're devilishly dangerous.
Mr. Anselmo.
-Mr. Anselmo!
-What's up, Gorka?
Thanks.
Cover the girl.
Come on.
Let's go.
Come on.
Is the weather always like this?
It was sunny moments ago.
That's just a rain cloud.
It'll clear up soon.
Leave your stuff here.
-Gorka!
-Mr. Anselmo.
Little Gorka, it's so good to see you.
-It's been so long.
-Yeah.
How come you didn't even show up
for Saint Roch's celebrations?
-Well...
-Scared of coming back to Tellera?
You know it.
-What happened to your nose?
-It's nothing. Just a little accident.
Yolanda, come here so I can introduce you.
Anselmo Martnez de Salinas, town priest
and Tellera's spiritual mentor.
Yolanda Penedo, art historian.
Nice to meet you.
This is... Wow!
She specializes in heritage.
-She's the one you did your master's with?
-Yes.
Come on, let's go!
The Sanctuary of Our Lady of the Dull.
Sixteenth century. Basque Gothic style.
Inspired by the German hallenkirchen.
The altarpiece
is from the Proto-Renaissance period.
You still haven't received government aid?
They don't give a damn about us.
Well, Father, they sent us.
Thousands like you have come through here.
Most recently,
some archeologists from Vitoria.
Look at what they did to my church.
It's been like this for a year.
I'm very unhappy with them.
Especially with their boss,
Peio Etxeberria.
The paleographer?
Paleographer, archeologist, art historian.
A prominent figure. He was my teacher.
-So, did they find anything interesting?
-Just a few bones.
And the foundations of the old
Romanesque church. Or so they say.
What's wrong with you? You're bleeding.
Come to the sacristy.
Come on, you're bleeding!
-I'll be right back, Yolanda!
-Move.
Leave Yolanda alone.
Mr. Anselmo, there's no need.
Yolanda is waiting for me.
I'm not doing it for you.
You're spilling huge drops of blood.
It's gonna look like the Virgin
came to life.
Take off your jacket.
You're dripping all over.
I'll get you...
some absorbent cotton
and hydrogen peroxide,
and I'll clean up your wound.
Come on, sit down.
Nathalie, what the--
What are you doing here?
Sit here until your dizziness goes away.
I'll show Yolanda the temple myself.
Stay here on your own.
I heard you came to town
and I wanted to see you.
No.
I think we left things pretty clear
before I moved to Valladolid
for my master's.
-Let me take a look.
-No!
-It's going to get infected. Come on.
-No big deal.
Gently.
You didn't miss me, even a little?
No? You didn't?
Did you dress up as a Basque for me?
Come on, you know
that makes me horny as hell.
-Is Gorka okay?
-Yes, it's nothing. He's a whiner.
-I'll go check on him.
-No, wait! Look.
Did I show you this?
Look. This is the tombstone
of Gorka's ancestor,
Martn de Intxausti.
One of the greatest knights
of medieval Tellera.
Touch it.
Limestone.
Wait.
I have to go.
-Me, too.
-Of course.
-Be careful. That floor is rotten.
-Don't worry, Father. I'm a professional.
-That was close.
-You see?
Are you okay?
Yolanda.
Yolanda! Are you okay?
-Are you okay?
-Yes!
Yes, I'm okay.
I think.
What about the lehendakari? We need to go.
-You go. I'll stay and rescue the girl.
-Are you sure?
-Yes.
-All right.
-Call me if you need anything.
-Okay.
-Yolanda!
-Yeah.
Are you down there?
Mr. Anselmo, be careful.
Shit, Mr. Anselmo!
Yolanda. Yolanda, thank God.
-Are you okay? Are you hurt?
-Yes. No, I--
-Your head? Did you hurt your head?
-No, I'm okay.
I'm okay. Now I'm hurt.
Well, I'll be damned.
There's a hidden crypt beneath the church.
And archeologists didn't find it.
Crap! Careful.
In the name of the Father,
Son and Holy Spirit.
Don't!
Hey, over here!
Yolanda, look at this.
It looks like there's an epitaph.
It's in Latin.
Shit, the girl is good.
Yes. But what does that mean, Yolanda?
"Here lays Walterius..."
-Walterius?
-Walter.
"Son of Lord..."
No, "Son of the legendary
Lord of Tellera...
William Tell."
William Tell?
The liberating Swiss hero?
The one with the apple?
Well, I'll be damned.
William Tell.
It looks like there's something in there.
Mr. Anselmo, give me a hand.
Yolanda, give us light.
Help me.
-It won't budge.
-A little bit more.
I got it.
I think I can reach it. Yeah.
-No!
-No!
-No!
-What are you doing?
Gorka, no! If it contains a document,
it could vanish
when coming into contact with air.
You...
Here ends my political career.
The Basque Country
has turned its back on us.
Honey, come on. Let's go home.
I'm gonna make you
a finger-licking good tuna pot.
It'll cheer you up.
This is the end, boys. It is what it is.
-It is what it is.
-Mr. Anselmo, hold on.
Iker! Hey!
What, Gorka?
You picked a bad day
to come back to Tellera.
What's wrong?
I thought today was the big day.
You didn't hear?
-We're not Basque anymore!
-Shit, you can't be serious.
The lehendakari thinks
we're just a marching band.
All this fighting for the Basque Country
has been in vain.
I warned you, but you wouldn't listen.
"Let's ignore the priest."
-Come on, Iker, cheer up.
-This subject's just...
Listen, this is Yolanda.
She's in charge of inventory.
-Hi. What's up?
-Hey, Yolanda. Nothing much.
-Hanging in there.
-We have to go.
-Come on, Iker. Let's go.
-Yes, let's go.
Anyway, Gorka, come by the baserri
one day, and we'll catch up.
You can bring the girl if you want.
-For fuck's sake, let's go.
-Yes!
Come on, Iker, cheer up.
You can do it.
Don Anselmo, champ. What?
What you got there,
the baston for the korrika?
Pothead.
You won't stop speaking.
Look, there's my dad! Dad!
-Mom!
-Sweetheart!
When did you get here?
Son, you're so skinny.
-Hello. How are you?
-Who is this?
This is Yolanda, my partner.
She's in charge of inventory.
What happened to her?
Why is she all dirty?
-Excuse me.
-Yeah.
I thought you were working
with that Galician from your university.
It is her, Mom. And she's not Galician,
she's from Ponferrada.
That's what I said, Galician.
I don't like her one bit.
If only you would've treated
Nathalie right.
Will you stop pestering me about Nathalie?
She's such a sweet girl.
And she got a job at the town hall.
She's Dad's right hand.
And you quit your job.
And that dull girl?
She's not good enough for you.
You make a terrible couple.
She has a boyfriend.
I told you, she's my partner,
in charge of inventory. Period.
Thanks to your dad.
He kept bugging that guy
from the government of Castile-Len.
Mom, that's enough, okay?
That's enough.
-Where is she staying?
-At the Lucerna.
Good, because she's not welcome
in my house.
So, sweetie, you're staying with us, yeah?
No need to waste money.
I know your pay is shit.
Besides, the Lucierna Inn is a hellhole.
-Lucerna.
-Yeah, that.
-I--
-Dad. Dad!
Don't be upset about this.
You know politics bring
only disappointments.
Antoln. Maybe this isn't the right time,
but your son, this young lady and I
have made a discovery.
Yeah. Did you know there's a hidden crypt
in the Sanctuary of the Dull?
And a medieval tomb. We found this.
I don't give three shits about that.
Let's go, Anamari.
-But Dad--
-Leave him be. He's being impossible.
Just like when Athletic loses a game.
Antoln! Antoln, hold on.
You're going to slip!
Will you wait for me?
You're so pig-headed!
-This could change our town's history.
-I know that, Mr. Anselmo. I know.
Tell him... Antoln!
I don't understand that man.
UNIVERSITY OF THE BASQUE COUNTRY
LAVA CAMPUS
-What's up, Peio?
-What's up, Gorka?
Hello, good-lookin'.
-Let's go.
-But--
Three years digging in that fucking
sanctuary, and we don't find a thing.
Two suckers show up, and bam!
Right off the bat.
The working class definitely has no luck.
Listen, Burka.
That crazy priest who greeted us
with a Mauser rifle, is he still there?
Mr. Anselmo?
We should continue the excavation,
but who's going to dare go back there?
Listen, Peio. Sorry. Have I mentioned
that Yolanda is a heritage specialist?
I'm a fervent admirer of your work.
Yeah, well, I just got back
from the council office.
I'm always up a gum tree.
Come on, let's go to the lab.
Show me that thing you found.
-All yours.
-My, oh, my.
You take it. Go on.
-Shit. You bastards, you found it!
-What?
What I've been looking for in archives
and excavations for a long time.
This...
could change the history
of the Basque Country,
of Spain, and even Switzerland's!
It mentions Tellstadt as a Swiss canton
far off from the original territory.
Tellstadt?
Tell me, Gorka, what do you prefer,
fried bread or picatostes?
-It's a trick question, isn't it?
-That's right. They're the same thing.
Okay. Tellstadt and Tellera
are exactly the same.
Be it in Basque, German, Swiss or Romansh.
"The city of Tell."
Tell-herria. Tell-hiria.
Tellera. Tellera, God damn it.
All right, slow down, Peio. Slow down.
Are you telling me...
Are you telling us...
that my town, Tellera...
-is of Swiss origin?
-That's right, boy.
It once was a canton
that belonged to the Swiss Confederation
in the 14th century.
But I thought William Tell was a myth.
No. Wrong, young lady.
He did exist. But the one we should really
be interested in is his son, Walter Tell.
He annexed Tellera to Switzerland
as a distant canton.
Apparently, Tell helped
King Henry of Trastmara
fight against Peter the Cruel.
And as payment,
he gave him the town.
Like, "There you go."
So if it hasn't been revoked...
Tellera could... No, should
be Swiss.
I'll have a txakol, Bernab.
Wait. Make it a Rueda.
It comes from our sturdy Castilian land.
Come on, Bernab, it's Thursday.
I want my free pintxo.
Cheers.
God damn it, Revuelta,
quit being a pain in the ass.
You've been annoying everyone all morning.
-Hey there, Bernab.
-What's up, Antoln?
This is all his fault.
We should banish him.
The Basque Government
has turned its back on us because of you.
You'd better watch your words, Abarro.
Antoln has absolute majority
in the city hall
and he's working his ass off for Tellera.
He should work his ass off
to solve the town's problems.
We always get cut off when it snows.
We need a snowplow.
And the kids have to study in Vitoria.
When will you build a high school?
And what's up
with the broadcast translator?
My TV only gets TVE and ETB1.
Shit, I'm Basque,
but that doesn't mean I want to watch
pelota games and oxen pulling all day.
What do you want me to do
if both the Spanish and the Basque
have forsaken us?
You're the mayor.
If you can't solve any problems,
-then get the fuck out!
-Exactly.
Solve our problems,
and stop wasting time on nonsense.
Your dad should know about this, right?
I don't know how I'm gonna tell my mom
that you're staying at the Lucerna.
Don't change the subject.
There's a lot to discuss
about this discovery.
Everyone wants a piece of the cake,
but I'm the one who found it.
All right, we both did.
-But I was the one who fell in the crypt.
-You got lucky!
Yeah, I did!
Did his friend recover from that fall?
Yolanda? Ask her yourself.
You'll see her at dinner.
She seems nice, huh?
And don't worry, she has a boyfriend.
Some Portuguese photographer. A genius.
The only thing that worries me
is that the discovery of this tomb
may be the end of our racket.
Hey. How are you, Gorka? Long time no see.
-How are you?
-Right.
Yeah, definitely.
-Yeah.
-Hi.
Right! Nathalie, Yolanda.
Yolanda, Nathalie.
-How do you do?
-You took quite a spill, huh?
Gosh, does the whole town know?
-Do you feel better?
-Yeah.
Listen, Mr. Anselmo.
You're not going to believe this,
but we went to see Peio Etxeberria,
and he won't come back here.
He's terrified of you.
-Yeah, he says you threatened him.
-Me?
With a Mauser rifle.
I threatened him with a what?
-A Mouser?
-With a Mauser rifle.
I don't know what that is,
a Mounser or whatever.
No. What that archeologist needs to do
is seal the excavation
so no more people fall in it.
Come on, Anamari's steak
is waiting for us. Let's go!
Here's the steak.
That looks delicious.
Enjoy.
-Will you pass the bread?
-Sure.
Some potatoes.
Make some room for the peppers.
So, Mr. Anselmo,
aren't you going to say grace?
In the name of the Father, the Son,
and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Dig in! Meat isn't half as good
when it's cold. Come on.
You want some?
-Just a little.
-Come on.
-That's enough.
-Thanks.
-You don't like steak?
-Me?
No, I just don't eat meat.
I'm a vegan.
Jeez.
-I'll make you a salad.
-No.
There's salad in the kitchen. I'll get it.
-No. Sit down, honey. I'll go.
-No, but--
-It's all right.
-I can eat pepper and potatoes, and...
Do you have quinoa?
Here's the salad.
-Here you go.
-Thank you.
Thank you.
Nathalie, you sure love steak, honey.
I don't know what you do with it,
you look so fit.
Everything is delicious, Anamari.
As always.
I've missed us spending time all together.
-The tomb. We need to talk about the tomb.
-Yeah, honey.
What is it that you've found
in the sanctuary?
The tomb of William Tell's son.
The one who stole from the rich
and gave to the poor?
-That was Robin Hood, Mom.
-Jesus.
William Tell, Robin Hood. Same thing.
Excuse me.
Antoln, lighten up.
That discovery is great for our town.
I'm only interested in finding a solution
to our real problems,
not interested in nonsense.
The snowplow, the high school,
the broadcast translator station.
Dad, listen to me.
The document we found in the crypt says
-that Tellera could be Swiss.
-Just what we needed.
After the Basque let-down?
This is different.
Yolanda, explain it to him.
-It can be--
-Antoln, listen to our boy. He's right.
-We went to see Peio Etxeberria.
-That guy makes me sick.
The paleontologist?
But he's such a nice person.
Mom, he's a paleographer.
A paleographer and archeologist.
He's going to explain everything
tomorrow at the city hall, Antoln.
This is the document.
And it's perfectly legal.
In fact, there is no evidence
of it being revoked to date.
Which means that Tellera is,
for all intents and purposes,
a Swiss canton.
Swiss?
So we can request an annexation
into Switzerland?
-That's right.
-What?
Let's think about this for a minute.
We've been trying to be Basque
all our lives.
Maybe being Swiss is what's best for us.
We're not Swiss, we're Basque, damn it!
Yeah, we're Basque!
Wrong. Not you, Bernab.
You are not Basque.
You are Helvetian.
A Betis supporter, me?
My team is Athletic till I die!
Here. Your family tree is pretty clear.
Since your father passed away,
you are a direct descendant
of William Tell.
But all my family names are Basque.
-Tellera, Tellegorri, Telletxea.
-Bernab, hold on.
Being a descendant of William Tell
is not that bad.
-No, not bad at all.
-I'm gonna kill you!
Anyway, I should leave now. I'm...
They're waiting for me in the crypt.
And I have to examine the tomb.
-So...
-Mr. Anselmo, where are you going?
Me? I just wanted to thank
Mr. Peio Etxeberria for his wisdom.
You left my church looking like a mess.
-I will get you, you bastard.
-All right. Bye-bye.
For 700 years, we have been fighting
amongst ourselves.
Some said we're Basque.
Others said we're Castilian.
This document states it clearly.
We are Swiss!
The Basque don't want us.
And we don't want to be Castilian.
So let's compromise. Let's be Swiss.
Swiss? This is unbelievable.
-How on earth could we be Swiss?
-All right.
What would it mean for Tellera
to be a part of Switzerland?
No.
We would be part of one of the most
prosperous countries in the world.
No?
I'll put the technicalities aside.
Two words. Tax haven.
Mr. Anselmo, tell everyone
what you told me.
The Way of Tell.
From Altdorf to Tellera.
The tomb could be a tourist attraction.
A focal point of pilgrimage.
Like the Primitive Way, only better.
God! We'll make a killing!
-Get ready for us, Way of St. James!
-Have you lost your minds?
How are we gonna be part of a country
located at the other end of Europe?
Hang on a second.
-Pay attention to this.
-That's nice.
Here is Tellera. Here is Tenerife.
Fourteen hundred miles away.
And we belong to the same country.
Here is Tellera. Here is Switzerland.
Eight hundred miles away.
That's 600 miles closer.
Who says we can't be Swiss?
He's right. We're closer to Geneva
than we are to Lanzarote, Revuelta.
You don't know jack.
And you did your military service there.
All right. Now that we've solved
the technical issues, let's vote.
-Come on, Bernab.
-Yes?
The ballot boxes.
-Yes.
-Yes.
-No.
-No.
-Yes.
-Yes.
Antoln's resignation.
This is Abarro's handwriting.
Invalid vote.
-Carrying on. Yes.
-Yes.
No.
No.
-I don't give a fuck.
-You... Invalid vote.
-And yes.
-Yes.
The results of the voting are...
Invalid votes, 14.
Abstentions, 86.
Votes for "no" on the annexation, 157.
Votes for "yes," 599.
Well, complying with the people's mandate,
the city hall will begin
the application process
for the annexation to Switzerland.
What are you talking about?
They won't pay any attention to you.
Dad, calm down, okay?
We'll talk about it at home.
I have nothing to say to you.
-Hooray for democracy!
-Great.
BASQUE COUNTRY
TELLSTAD TELLSTADT, A NEW CANTON?
A tiny Spanish village
wants to become a member
of the Swiss Confederation.
Here is more information
from Hans Moser in Tell Town.
The grave of William Tells son Walter
was discovered in the town's church.
The Swiss government will send
a delegation to Tell Town,
to devise a plan for the potential
integration into the Swiss Confederation.
Will this become the 27th canton?
BERN - SWITZERLAND
FEDERAL PALACE
You're going to take off that hat,
aren't you?
Forgive me, Antoln but...
I've been wearing a txapela all my life,
and I love this hat.
It must be in my genes.
Follow me.
Mrs. President. Pleased to meet you.
As a descendant of the one
and only William Tell,
it is an honor for me to be
in front of the person
who rules the country of my ascentors.
Ancestors.
Will you shut up?
She can't understand you.
And she's not the president.
She's the Deputy
Secretary-General of State.
Take a seat.
The whole matter about Tellera
has generated sympathy
among the Swiss people.
You see? She can understand us.
We are studying the possibility
of bringing the tomb to Altdorf,
but it is too soon.
We have already talked to Yolanda Penedo,
the person who made the discovery.
What?
What we want is to be Swiss.
You must understand,
this entails a process that may take long.
Your people don't speak our languages,
your culture is different from ours,
and you are not in Switzerland.
In other words...
You are not Swiss.
Unimportant details.
Nathalie was born here. Bernab...
You can see the genes in his face.
He's a Tell from head to toe.
Besides, I know a few words
in Swiss already.
Nestl, Federer, Rolex, Shaqiri...
Ricola!
You do not look all that ready.
Our people are studying the matter.
In three months, we will go to Tellera
to begin a reflection process to--
Good! In three months, we'll be Swiss.
We will see that in three months.
Make the most of your trip
and get to know our beautiful city.
Auf Wiedersehen!
-Did it go well?
-I don't know.
-It went well.
-Good!
-Yolanda, slow down.
-Gorka, calm down.
Dude, I'm driving super slow.
You're driving too fast.
We're not in a hurry.
And we need to wait for Nathalie.
She'll be back from Switzerland soon.
-Nathalie is coming, too?
-Of course.
Iker, Nathalie and I
have been buddies forever.
At the dinner,
it looked like you were a couple.
No.
Well, yeah. I mean, we went out together.
But nothing has happened between us
in a long time.
I didn't mean...
-I mean, it was just a comment. I didn't--
-I know.
-I didn't mean to be nosy.
-I know, don't worry.
It's right there, to the left. There.
-Boy!
-Little guy.
-Hi!
-What's up, Iker?
Casillas!
Easy, lie down.
Sit!
He's totally under my control,
but lately he's being a little naughty.
-I can see that.
-All right. Let's go.
Come in, you two.
-Iker's dog...
-Casillas. He's named Casillas.
Basque Sorrow Number Three.
It shows the consequences
of the Basque conflict
in the consumer society.
I mean, it's obvious.
-It's obvious.
-It's obvious.
And this one... This one's really has a...
bird's soul.
Bird's soul.
It talks about social alienation
and panic in the welfare state.
It's my most commercial work, you know?
I just sold it to Otxandiano's batzoki.
No shit?
God damn it!
The entire house is filled with smoke.
This looks like an Altos Hornos furnace.
Don't piss me off, okay?
And don't make any noise.
I have an early morning.
Excuse me.
Yes, Fer?
Yeah, I know. What's wrong with me?
Do you really want to know?
You called me 20 times.
That's what's wrong with me.
I told you I couldn't talk. I'm working.
No!
Seriously, you've been away
for three months.
For three months. And you never called.
Now I'm the one who's away,
and it's a problem?
What?
-So, you and Yolanda, huh?
-What?
What?
Well... Yeah, right? I mean...
I don't know, man.
I'm totally hung up on her.
You dog. Well, I have my own thing
going on, too. It's...
You know what the problem is, Iker?
I don't know, my head is a mess.
Sometimes, I think... I don't know,
that maybe I have feelings for...
-Shit, Nathalie!
-You're getting high as hell, aren't you?
-Am I too late for dinner?
-Hi. How are you?
-How did things go in Switzerland?
-How did it go in Switzerland?
-Switzerland.
-Good.
You and I have to talk.
Outside. Now.
Come on, help me set everything up.
Let's have dinner outside.
It's a beautiful, beautiful night.
-What's up?
-Nothing. Are you okay?
-Yeah, I'm okay. Just a little cold.
-Do you need a blanket?
That would be great.
Great. Yes, I see you're feeling great
in Tellera after your discovery.
You discoverer.
-I don't follow you.
-I spoke to the Swiss.
And I want everything related to them
to be run by the city hall.
Shut up!
Yeah, but I don't work for you.
The regional government ordered
the inventory. They are my bosses.
And let me remind you that this is Castile
until proven otherwise.
What about Gorka?
Why didn't you tell him anything?
I didn't tell him
because there was no time.
-Right.
-What do you mean, "right"?
-I was going to tell him later.
-I'm going to tell him now, don't worry.
-Gorka!
-What is your problem?
I don't like the way you're talking to me.
Look, honey, this is Tellera.
You'd better follow the rules.
-What rules? You--
-Someone say my name?
-You shut up!
-You shut up!
Shut the hell up!
Citizens of Tellera.
As your mayor,
there is something I'd like to say to you.
And what I want to say...
is that the Swiss want us.
We are their priority!
Excellent.
In three months,
we will adapt to their culture.
It's not that complicated.
We'll just have to make
small changes in our cooking,
adapt to their schedules,
and slowly start speaking
Swiss German correctly.
Unimportant details.
Swiss German? You people have been nagging
about speaking Basque for 30 years
and no one here can speak it.
-Speak for yourself. You're from Laredo.
-I'm from Colindres, you ignorant fool.
Colindres, Laredo, Castro...
They all belong to Santander.
Castro isn't Basque?
Listen. The Swiss want us to adapt
to their legal
and administrative structure so that--
Look, it's Bernab!
He looks like the jack of clubs!
The alphorn is hard to play,
but you'll get used to it.
Carry on, Antoln.
Citizens of Tellera,
let's join together and make Tellera
the 27th canton!
Bravo! Bravo!
-Long live Switzerland!
-Hurrah!
BASQUE LANGUAGE SCHOOL
SWISS LANGUAGE SCHOOL
Willkommen in Tellstadt.
A small town located in the heart
of the Iberian Peninsula
of Swiss history, culture and sentiment.
Come with me in this incredible journey
through the little Switzerland.
I live in the little Switzerland
In a place called Tellstadt
Postcard-beautiful mountains
And lakes all around
It's where a discovery was made
That's going to change our history
And it brings us closer to William Tell
We want to be
A part of Switzerland now
And then we'll all come together and shout
An idyllic place of peaceful
and cheerful people
who keep their culture alive.
It may be a little Switzerland,
but it has a giant heart!
It looks great. Now just edit out the part
when I fell down and post it online.
But it's already on--
Swiss German.
-Antoln is very good at it.
-He really is.
-And he looks so handsome in that outfit.
-No.
Look how handsome.
Pour me some white wine.
-What is this?
-Noirillon Salvagnin.
From the canton of Vaud.
Just pour me a cup of Rueda.
But we only have Swiss wines.
No free pintxo, either? It's Thursday.
They don't do free pintxos in Switzerland.
-Right. I see they're only for friends.
-They paid for those.
-What the fuck is this shit?
-Noirillon Salvagnin.
-I want a txakol! Numbnuts.
-We only have Swiss wines.
Damn it all to hell.
Who the fuck closed the pelota court?
You ever hear of people
playing pelota in Switzerland?
Antoln.
This is not Switzerland.
-This is the Basque Country!
-And Castile.
No more Basque rural sports.
Skiing is Switzerland's sport.
Gstaad, St. Moritz, Tellera.
Our town will be crowded with celebrities!
Carolina, Mette-Marit,
Preysler and her playwright.
Maybe I'll be on Hola! magazine.
-Come on. Peace.
-We don't eat that shit.
Let's get out of here.
I'm too mad for this.
We'll put an end to this.
Very soon, Antoln. Very soon.
Even if it's only symbolic,
it's good to delineate our borders.
SWITZERLAND
TELLERA
Make sure it's straight.
-Look at this.
-Come here.
Come. Come here.
This way. All this way up until here.
What do you think?
What is this, Bernab?
Yeah, I know he's missing the spear.
But don't worry, it'll be here tomorrow.
I'm amazed.
We've been independent for one day
and you've already managed to get
a pastoral visit from the Pope.
You rock.
Let's walk, come on. March.
Yes, this is it.
Excuse me?
This is not Switzerland.
We do not have a special taxation system.
How should I know?
Call back when Tellera is independent.
Which I doubt will happen!
Yeah, all right. Goodbye.
-I'd like to update my bank book.
-Can you believe this, Mr. Anselmo?
That's the fifth guy that wants
to deposit his undeclared money here.
Even Cristiano Romario's lawyer called.
Can you believe it?
Update my bank book and don't bother me
with nonsense, Abarro.
I'll update it right away, Mr. Anselmo.
Tellera will never be Swiss.
LUCERNA INN
The Swiss offered me a contract.
And I'm considering staying.
You're staying?
We can both stay,
if you don't mind working for them.
In fact, I told Peio about it,
and he thinks
it's a really good opportunity for us.
But what about the rest of the inventory?
We still need to go to Fras.
Okay.
Would you rather be bored to death
in Fras,
or conduct a research that will bring us
fame, reputation, money--
Yes, Yolanda, all of that sounds great.
And when we're done with the research,
we can go to Switzerland
and take the tomb with us.
No, not with the tomb.
Think about it.
What about the Way of Tell?
Mr. Anselmo would be very upset.
And my dad. And everyone. No.
Gorka, the whole annexation thing...
The Swiss don't give a crap about it.
-They just want the tomb.
-And you're going to help them?
Are you listening to yourself?
How can you be so selfish?
-Selfish?
-Yeah!
How can you be such a sucker?
This annexation thing
isn't going anywhere.
I'm sorry to be the one to tell you,
but the Swiss don't care about you.
Look, Yolanda...
It's great that you want to pursue
your dreams,
your ambitions and your career.
That's what I like most about you.
Just don't do it at the expense
of others, okay?
Especially at the expense of my people.
Arratsalde on.
Good afternoon.
-Arratsalde on, God damn it!
-Good fucking afternoon!
I don't like you, and you don't like me.
But there are things we dislike even more.
Tellera annexing to Switzerland.
That would be one.
I don't get why they insist
on making this town a part of Switzerland.
We have nothing in common.
SPAIN AND SWITZERLAND
CAN'T REACH AN AGREEMENT ON TELLERA
Yeah, all right. I'll hold.
NEW PRIORITY MISSION:
OPERATION TELLERA
Hello?
It's the radio people.
Sure, I'll put you through.
Democracy will not be beaten.
Hello?
Well...
Democracy will not be beaten.
In Switzerland, there is no place
for violent people.
No, that's all. No further comments.
Thank you.
"Flagen. Flagen."
Forty-five minute late.
Note. The situation in Tellera
is far worse than we expected.
Terrorist attacks,
language immersion,
the Basque issue all over again...
Shit, this is a powder keg.
THIS IS NOT SPAIN
OF COURSE NOT, DUMBASS, IT'S A WALL
YEAH, BUT IT'S A SWISS WALL
Hi. I'm Yolanda Penedo, art historian.
Leave your message...
Hey, there.
Where are you going?
You can't come in. No visits today.
Hi. I'm a photographer
from National Geographic.
I've come a long way
to do an article on the tomb.
I don't care if you're from Intervi.
Come back next week if you want.
-All right, thank you.
-Bye.
So, how's the couple doing?
We are not a couple.
Hello.
One Merovingian goblet. Move the tablet.
Yes.
-One Visigoth bell with no clapper.
-Gorka--
Gorka, working like this is a pain.
Seriously, do you want us to be mad
at each other?
One reliquary casket.
What kind of equipment?
Precision rifles?
I may still have a couple.
I'd need to check.
Have the advance payment ready.
Bye.
-And one golden cross--
-And that's all! Enough!
What I meant to say yesterday was
let's go to Switzerland together.
To Switzerland, to Cochinchina,
Montenegro, South Sudan, I don't care.
I just--
I just want to be with you.
There, I said it.
I'll be right back.
Yolanda, I've been waiting for you
to say that all this time.
It's perfect!
You, me...
Walter Tell's putrefied corpse...
-Fernando?
-Yolanda?
Oh, come on!
How did this happen, Fer?
Did you get your fingers
caught in something?
I thought I told you not to come in.
-I was looking for Yolanda, my girlfriend.
-You said you wanted to take photos.
The magazine sent me here
to do an article,
and Yolanda turned out to be here as well.
-Oh, really?
-No!
No, seriously. We haven't seen each other
for four months, and you show up now?
Yeah! What are you doing here?
You stay out of it.
Hey, you're Koldo! From her master's.
Gorka.
That's great! You're working with Koldo?
-Gorka!
-Gorka!
Seriously. When you're told
you can't come in,
you can't come in.
That sign is pretty clear.
I don't get people.
No, leave me alone.
-What's wrong with you?
-We'll talk later.
-Who is that with Yolanda?
-It's her boyfriend.
A travel photographer.
A weird guy. Lusitanian.
You've got to be kidding. Fucking Fernando
showing up just now. Awesome.
-Bye.
-Bye.
-What's up with him?
-I don't know.
Sign here, please.
-Good evening.
-Good evening.
You're working late.
We're done now.
Baby, what would you like for dinner?
-Should I make you a bonito omelette?
-No, I had a few snacks.
I left Iker and Abarro alone.
The opposition, face to face.
You know what?
I'm going to bed. I'm worn out.
And I think while I was in the sanctuary
I may have pulled a muscle on my back.
-Let me see.
-No, it's okay, Nathalie. No need.
Antoln. Let's go to bed.
Hang on, they're showing
all the goals from Division 2.
You can watch that upstairs
on your tablet.
-It'll just take a second.
-No, it won't.
The other night I waited an hour for you.
I was bored to death.
Come on. Go to bed.
-Good night.
-Good night.
-Right here?
-Right there, yes.
Can you feel it?
Right there, it's a huge muscle knot.
-The sanctuary is keeping you busy, right?
-Yeah, the whole Walter thing--
-Is your friend still mad?
-Yeah. She'll get over it. I think.
Be careful. Don't let her
leave you out of the Swiss thing.
No!
No, I was very clear with her.
We made this discovery together.
Right.
What's going to happen between us,
now that you're staying longer?
What do you mean, "between us"? You and I?
-No.
-No?
No.
What are you doing?
I'm not leaving until my work is finished.
Things are going to get very ugly here.
You're gonna have to listen to me.
Your work is secondary.
Excuse me?
Secondary?
Fer, this is the opportunity of my life!
-My future depends on Tellera.
-Well, you have to trust me.
How am I gonna trust you?
I haven't heard from you in months!
Dude, this has been going on
for a long time.
I'm tired of you.
Believe me when I say
things are going to get ugly in this town.
Things will get ugly
if you don't tell me right now
where you've been for the last months.
I already told you, I was in Namibia!
Taking photographs
of the Kalahari bushmen.
What, there was no signal in Namibia?
You couldn't drop me
an email from Namibia?
Phone signal in Namibia, with the bushmen?
-Come on, are you kidding?
-What are you, a secret agent?
You're shitting me.
You're telling me that you work
for the CNI?
We can't talk about that, okay?
Unbelievable.
Turns out I've been going out
with Mort & Phil
and I find out this late in the movie.
Unbelievable.
Come on, baby.
You know you're the reason
I'm in Tellera.
You know how much I love you.
Should we spend the night here
and leave tomorrow?
No, I'm not going anywhere.
-You're not?
-No.
What if I told you that the priest
has a chest full of guns and explosives
in his sacristy? What then?
-Mr. Anselmo?
-That's right.
Yeah, right.
I hope you have a good reason
for making me get out of bed this early.
I do have a good reason.
I was told
you're hiding a stash of guns
and explosives in here.
-Let me guess who told you.
-That is irrelevant.
You either tell me what's going on,
or I tell everyone
and put an end to your scheme!
Listen, my child. Do not raise your voice
at me in the house of the Lord.
And don't assume the worst.
This is not what it looks like,
and there's an explanation.
I was walking in the forest
a few months ago,
looking for mushrooms
to make myself some scrambled eggs.
Because I love chanterelles
with some garlic, chili pepper,
-with a good organic egg...
-Get to the point, Father.
I was about to collect a perretxiko
when I saw something.
You found an ETA cache?
Intact. Unsoiled. Pristine.
So I had two options.
Either go to the police,
-or try to sell the guns.
-What?
-To the Chechens, or the Arabs.
-What?
But that's not all. I'm leaving the cache,
and guess who I run into.
-Who?
-Nathalie.
Yeah, what a surprise.
She followed me. She wanted to know
where I get my mushrooms.
No one knows about that place.
Because, let me tell you,
I'm a mushroom enthusiast.
-I may be a priest, but I--
-Okay, Father.
You're beating around the bush.
Continue, please.
Try to understand.
Look at what they've done to my church.
Twenty kilos of ammonal would cover
the window panes to seal the excavation.
Otherwise, who's going to pay
for this mess?
-Thank you
-Welcome.
I had to come to an agreement
with Nathalie.
Half for the city hall,
half for the church.
Does Gorka know?
Gorka?
Nathalie might have told him,
now that they're back together.
They're together?
Yes.
All right.
-I have to... I'm leaving.
-Sure.
-Bye.
-Bye.
-Why are you with Abarro?
-Well, if it isn't the couple of the hour.
You finally got what you wanted.
So, involved in capital flight, are we,
Abarro?
Shouldn't it be the other way around,
now that we're going to be Swiss?
Go to hell, Intxausti.
You're even dumber than your dad.
You're both being hornswoggled by her
and you don't even know about it.
This fool.
-You've lost your minds with all this.
-Yeah.
Bye, Nathalie.
-Where are you going?
-Inside.
-No.
-No?
Look, Nathalie...
I don't know what's going to happen
from this point on.
Is it because of what Abarro said?
No. I don't give a shit
what Abarro says.
Nathalie, you know I've always liked you.
And I love you a bunch.
-But...
-You like Yolanda.
You're in love with her, aren't you?
Yes.
Shit! You scared me!
What the hell is this?
What are you two doing together?
You can't stand each other.
So you want to blow up
William Tell Junior's tomb.
-Are you nuts?
-All the Swiss care about is the tomb.
They don't give a damn
about anything else.
Without the mausoleum
of William Tell's son,
what does our town have
that could interest them?
-Nothing.
-Nothing.
No. I'm chilling now
and I don't want any trouble. I...
Besides, why the hell
don't you do it yourselves?
No, right now I'm...
super focused on my work and going through
an awesome creative phase.
I just can't. I...
How about now?
I was going to sell that
to the community center in Apamonasterio!
To hell with that sculpture.
Now you'll have to focus
on the fight for Euskadi.
-And for Spain. Don't forget.
-All right.
-No, I can't do this to Nathalie.
-Do what?
Betray her now that we're going out.
We're going to be family, Revuelta!
Forget about my daughter.
She's with Gorka.
But she can't be going out with Gorka.
Gorka is going out with Yolanda.
Well, Anamari is telling everyone
that they're back together.
And that they hooked up
the other night at his place, right?
They hooked up?
There, now it looks better.
All right. I'm in.
-Antoln.
-Hold on.
I'm not even gonna ask. Mr. Mayor.
That's Canton President.
Stay still.
I talked to Heidi.
They're bringing everything forward.
The Swiss will be here in one week
to legalize the procedure.
-One week?
-But that's not what we talked about.
The Spanish government
refuses to negotiate.
They are sure about this
and want to come right away.
-Shit!
-Right away?
What do you mean, "right away"?
But my Swiss German is still very sloppy.
We should have picked Romansh.
Nobody can speak that.
-God!
-Tell me, Nathalie...
Be honest, okay?
Do you think we are ready?
There are a few issues
we need to solve first.
Abarro refuses to accept
suspicious funds in the bank.
Shit!
My father wants to move the inn
to Miranda.
Flight of companies. They're trying
to economically strangle us.
-All right, that's enough. Enough. No!
-It's just...
-Let's focus. Okay?
-Shit!
First off, we're going to set up
a nice welcoming committee for them.
What are you doing?
Hey, stop that! Stop! What are you--
-Holy shit!
-Are you crazy?
You can't go through.
What do you mean we can't go through?
I need to talk to Nathalie.
She's my niece. Tell her Pascual is here.
Pascual Revuelta.
Go.
-Hey, Iker. What is it?
-Hi, Anamari. Is Gorka home?
Yes, he's inside, watching Saber y ganar.
-Come in.
-Thank you.
-I'll be upstairs, okay?
-All right.
-Automatization.
-I can't believe it.
Hey, Iker! Epic. They just showed
the Saber y ganar rap again.
-No!
-Yeah!
-Knowing and winning
-Knowing and winning...
It's so good. You bastard.
Shit! Iker, what the fuck, man?
Why don't you ask Nathalie? Fart face.
What?
Uncle Pascual, it's enough
that I have to argue with my dad,
I don't want to argue with you.
You're not even going
to give me a kiss, Nathaly?
My name is not Nathaly, I'm Nathalie.
And no, I won't.
All right, Nathalie.
I don't want any trouble, okay?
Your dad moved to Switzerland
because he damn pleased.
Besides, I'm here on duty.
I'm going to make sure
Tellera doesn't turn into a powder keg.
Tellera is going to become
part of Switzerland.
-Switzerland? Damn--
-Yeah.
Great, just what we needed now.
-Did you call them?
-Why would I call these guys?
-Hey.
-What's up?
The lehendakari sent us
to impose order in this ruckus.
Who here is Nathalie?
It's obvious I'm not Nathalie.
Shit, you're Pascual. How are you, man?
-Shit, Gorrotxategi. How are you?
-Same old. Good.
-Yeah. A lot of work lately, huh?
-I'll say.
We need to fix this soon, or...
Nathaly! Nathalie!
Come on, don't tell me
you believe what the priest said.
I don't know who to believe anymore.
-Who else would you believe? Me!
-You?
-Yeah, right!
-Yola.
You didn't know Iker was going out
with Nathalie before you came back?
How should I have known that, Mom?
I'm always the last to find out
about everything in this town.
Yolanda! Yolanda, hold on, please!
-Yolanda.
-Great, and now you.
What happened to you? No, don't tell me.
-Nathalie slapped you in the face?
-Will everyone stop mentioning Nathalie?
I'm not going out with Nathalie.
I've moved on.
It didn't look like you had moved on
when you slept together the other night.
Get your head straight, son.
Is there a problem?
Who is this?
Let's get out of this fucking crazy town.
This place is not for us. Come on.
Who are you calling crazy, fart face?
You and your damn mom.
My baby is not crazy!
Mom, no!
No. Stop!
Mom, please, stop!
That's enough. Enough, Mom!
Stop it!
Let's go, Fer.
Fifty, as usual?
No. Today I need...
something else.
Speed, coke, meth, special K, happy pills,
-heroin--
-Let's take it slow.
Marijuana?
Later, maybe...
But no. This is about something else.
Talk to the boss about that.
You can't have that in here!
What are you, stupid?
Relax, uncle.
The detonator's under control.
Iker!
Damn your skull, Iker.
Do not play with that.
So, a cup of coffee?
DEAR YOLANDA,
YOUR POST-DOCTORAL SCHOLARSHIP REQUES FOR THE UNIVERSITY OF FLORENCE
HAS BEEN APPROVED.
We should spend the night in Vitoria.
Things here are too weird. I don't know
how you put up with these people.
Fer!
I got it! The scholarship!
-The post-doctoral in Florence!
-That's great, my love!
You're not just beautiful,
you're just as smart.
Yeah!
But what am I gonna do?
This is in Florence,
and the Swiss want me there.
I think it's obvious.
Florence, Switzerland.
What is there to think about?
Let's go home. We'll be together.
You can support me.
I need you now more than ever.
You need me?
No. I mean...
Now that things are working out for me...
I care about my job, you know?
I'm sure of that.
Have you not partied enough
with all this inventory thing?
-Partied?
-Yes.
That's how much you care about my job?
Is it? Just about as much
you care about me, right?
This is not a job.
Come on, looking at saints in churches?
You've got to be shitting me.
Are you being serious right now?
Yolanda...
Get out.
I'm sorry.
-Get the fuck out.
-I just--
Go away! I don't want to see you.
This is over. This is over.
You're kicking me out?
-That's right. I'm sick of you.
-All right.
Well, just so you know,
you always had a bad temper.
I don't want to see you again!
Fuck!
Shit, Nathalie, you startled me.
Are you trying to kill me?
Is that everything?
Yes, let's go.
All right.
You still have to tell me
how they found out.
What is Nathalie doing here?
-She told me she was going to see you.
-Me?
And I knew you were coming with me, so...
I should've put a leash on her.
Come on.
Damn it, it's locked.
How are we gonna get in?
Using the key!
My seven years as an altar boy
weren't in vain.
Let's go.
GORKA - I'LL MISS YOU TOMORROW
WHEN THE SWISS GET HERE.
YOLANDA - I'M STAYING.
SEE YOU TOMORROW.
WHAT ABOUT FERNANDO?
IT'S OVER.
BESIDES, I GOT THE SCHOLARSHIP
FOR FLORENCE.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO...
FLORENCE, SWITZERLAND...
I'D GO ANYWHERE WITH YOU.
WILL YOU COME WITH ME?
All done.
-Antoln, time to sleep.
-No.
-Tomorrow is a very important day.
-Let me--
-No, let me finish watching--
-Please. Antoln!
Come on.
Good night.
WILLIAM TELL
Answer me, Gorka.
You're such a pain, Fer.
In case it wasn't obvious...
I love you.
I love you more.
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
We're back in Tellera
for another historic day.
The day when this Castilian town
of Basque culture will become Swiss.
-Go Switzerland!
-Go!
You must be excited, Mr. Mayor.
Canton President.
Indeed, very excited.
This is an important day
for Tellera, isn't it?
Tellstadt.
Tellstadt.
Yes, very important, because we...
We are Swiss.
Because of our culture, our sentiment,
our--
And like you always say,
Mr. Canton President,
because of the banks.
Bernab, come over here for a second.
We need to arrange these people
before the Swiss get here.
-You go over there. Far from here.
-Yes. Great.
-All right.
-And you go over there, Anamari.
The president is coming!
He's coming! Antoln!
-You gotta fix that.
-No, let's not do this now.
Come on.
Let's do this!
Where's the president?
They sent Heidi.
She has no authority. This smells fishy.
After all the trouble we went through
to get the press here, they send her.
-She's so uptight!
-God damn it!
Let's not panic. Stick to the plan.
Welcome to Tell Town.
What's going on here?
Are you celebrating the town fair?
Sorry, Mr. Intxausti,
could I speak to you in private
for a minute?
In private?
What we need to discuss here
is something the entire town
and all of Switzerland should hear.
-This way.
-Please.
Long live Switzerland!
-Go Switzerland!
-Go!
Go!
-Shut off that microphone!
-Shit.
The Swiss president
couldn't make it today.
But Mrs. Mller-Gomes
is here as his representative
to legalize what we've always known.
That we were, we are,
and will always be Swiss.
Mrs. Mller-Gomes will speak now.
Hello.
As you all know, we have always been
of the opinion that Tellstadt
is a part of Switzerland.
-Long live Switzerland!
-However,
I must announce
there has been an alteration.
-Switzerland is going to invest...
-Look, everything's ready.
-a lot of money in Spain.
-Come on. Hey!
We have reached an agreement
with the government of Spain
which will satisfy every one of us.
What the fuck do we care about Spain?
Same fucking story once again.
We're only interested in Tellera!
I don't understand you guys.
You used to be fighting all the time,
and now you're like common-law partners.
Those two clowns.
Hey, what did we miss?
Just this Helvetian talking nonsense.
Governments from both countries
are going to work together
to ensure you have everything you need.
But for that to happen,
we need something from you.
Anything.
We want to take Walter Tell's tomb
to Switzerland, where it belongs.
What is she talking about?
But it's already in Switzerland, honey.
In the little Switzerland.
That tomb isn't going anywhere
even if God himself comes to get it!
Hit it.
Get inside!
Iker!
Stay calm. Everything is under control.
There was a bomb.
-What about the tomb?
-It's unscratched.
I took the bomb, started running...
and threw it on the open field.
Nathalie, I love you...
like hell.
And I'll become Swiss if that's
what it takes for you to like me.
He's even dumber than last week.
Can you believe it?
Bernab, there's something
really important I need to tell you.
Iker.
What is he doing?
-You're okay.
-Iker!
-Iker!
-Holy crap. Damn.
-Bernab.
-Yes. What is it?
Those sheep in the field...
-They were yours, right?
-Yeah, why?
Well, you should know...
that you don't really have them anymore.
Shit.
-Oh, my.
-Let's go.
What happened?
-Listen.
-Yeah?
What you said before...
Nathalie...
I love you.
ONE YEAR LATER
And here we are. Rockin' it.
Mr. Anselmo is happy
now that the sanctuary is repaired.
Nathalie and him bought a bus
to get the tourists here.
Revuelta and my uncle are inseparable.
The whole town calls them
common-law partners.
Or lawless partners.
Bernab started planting apple trees.
I guess it's in his genes.
Antoln still has absolute majority
in the city hall,
while Anamari sorts out
his "unimportant details."
Gorka got to be a contestant
on Saber y ganar
and was eliminated the first day.
He and Yolanda have become famous
giving conferences all over the world.
And even though we're still
a Castilian town with Basque culture,
Tellera was, is, and will always be,
the little Switzerland.
I forget that you don't love me
Especially on Fridays
Especially on Fridays
Don't answer my messages
I don't deserve your attention
I don't deserve your attention
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I forget that you don't love me
Especially on Fridays
Especially on Fridays
Don't answer my messages
I don't deserve your attention
I don't deserve your attention
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
Look at him.
-Disgusting.
-Cut.
Sorry. Hold on a second.
Come on. God damn it!
Inspired by the German hallenkirchen.
The pussy is from the Renaissance period.
Yolanda Penedo, art historian...
Yeah. Art hist... I can't.
Cut.
...visited by the lehen...
Shit.
Cantabria is a recent invention.
I guess that's all.
Where are you from?
-Cut.
-I forgot what's next.
-I'll destroy your entire office.
-Cut.
Cut.
Who are you calling crazy, Ricky Martin?
Cut.
Would you like some anchovies?
-Cut.
-Go get them.
They're getting high smoking this blunt.
Cut.
Shit.
-The door's open.
-Great, then.
Where have you been all this...
-Where do you live?
-It's all Greek to me.
That's beautiful!
Keep going.
-Cut.
-What about the tomb?
Subtitle translation by Arturo Fernndez
Welcome to Tellera. Today is the day!
Tellera is a Castilian town
located in the heart of the Basque Country
since the Middle Ages.
This peculiar settlement's
culture and idiosyncrasy
are a hundred percent Basque.
But this unwonted situation
will end today.
Lehendakari Txomin Iturraspe
is expected to arrive any second now,
who is going to announce that Tellera
will become a part of the Basque Country.
-Long live Euskadi!
-Hurrah!
-You must be excited, Mr. Mayor.
-Very excited.
It has been nearly 700 years.
But that just goes to show
that we are truly Basque.
Our tenacity, our culture,
because we feel it.
And like you always say,
because of tax benefits.
That's what I'm talking about.
Say all you want, the truth is
we belong to Burgos, just like morcilla.
Sure, especially you.
The fucking half-Swiss Cantabrian.
Cantabria is a recent invention.
Santander was always Old Castile's port.
And I moved to Switzerland
because I had no choice.
It looks like there are differences
of opinion in town, Mr. Mayor.
Just a few. And they're all treated
with tolerance and respect.
Move the Basque flag a little bit
to the right so they can see it better.
Look alive!
And out with the Castilian one!
Where's Nathalie?
Something must've happened to her.
She's always on time.
-Damn it!
-As soon as the lehendakari gets here,
you start waving those flags, okay?
Nathalie, where were you?
-What's up with your hair? What happened?
-Help me.
Put some effort into it!
You gotta look Basque!
Bernab, get rid of the kid
with the Spanish jersey.
Yes.
It doesn't matter
if you get rid of that kid,
-we're still Spaniards.
-Ait, will you let me do my job?
Not "ait." "Dad."
Besides, you're not Basque.
You were born in Switzerland.
We have to arrange these people
before the lehendakari gets here.
-Can I ask--
-Not now.
-Here he comes! He's here!
-The lehendakari!
-It's okay.
-You gotta fix that.
Where's the lehendakari?
They sent Gumucio. This smells fishy.
After all the trouble we went through
to get the press here, they send him.
-He has no authority.
-God damn it!
Let's not panic. Stick to the plan.
Welcome to Tellera.
Antoln Intxausti, mayor of Tellera.
Here to serve God,
the lehendakari and you.
Come on, Mr. Mayor, we know each other.
What's going on here?
Are you celebrating the town fair?
Could I speak to you in private
for a minute?
In private?
What we need to discuss here
is something the entire town
and all of Spain should hear.
Come on.
-Nathalie. I'll be here if there's...
-Cool.
Okay?
-Long live Tellera!
-Hurrah!
-Long live Euskadi!
-Hurrah!
Lehendakari!
The lehendakari couldn't make it today.
But Mr. Gumucio is here as
a representative of the Basque Government
to legalize what we've always known.
That we were, we are,
and will always be Basque.
That we were, we are,
and will always be Basque.
Yes!
Mr. Gumucio will speak now.
Ari, ari, ari, Antoln for lehendakari!
Good morning.
As you all know, the Gasteiz government
-has always asserted the Basqueness...
-Hey! Put that down!
of Tellera.
Well, I wouldn't say always.
Dude, shut up! This is a historic day!
-Tellera!
-Hurrah!
However, I must announce
there has been a small alteration.
We have reached
a profitable economic agreement
with the Government of Castile-Len
to expand Basque companies
in strategic territories
such as Las Batuecas
-or El Bierzo.
-What? You can't do that!
-This is not Castile!
-Here we go again.
-And what's that got to do with us?
-Exactly.
What's that got to do with us?
It means we're still Castilian.
You're so annoying, Revuelta.
You sound like a broken record.
In return for this
extremely profitable agreement
which benefits every one of us,
what the government asks of us is...
that we cease to demand that Tellera
be declared a Basque settlement.
What did he say?
No matter how much you insist,
you will not be Basque.
Sorry, I didn't mean to.
THE LITTLE SWITZERLAND
Moving on to local news.
Tellera, the Castilian settlement
located in the heart of the Basque Country
will receive the visit
of a Basque representative
in order to study the annexation...
TWO HOURS EARLIER
...to this territory
after being a part of Castile...
Shit, that was today?
I bet the town is in an uproar.
I knew it.
We should've gone to Fras.
There's plenty of work there.
Well, I haven't called home in days.
Besides, the Sanctuary of the Dull
is a mile away from the town center.
We won't hear a thing.
Don't even think about it.
Keep your eyes on the road.
I'll read the messages for you.
-Don't you dare look!
-I won't look. Just keep driving.
There's a spot on my glasses.
LONG LIVE EUSKADI
TELLERA
I booked a room at the Lucerna Inn.
What about you?
Are you going to stay at your parents'?
Me? Yeah.
I'll pay them a visit.
Right.
Yolanda, you know you can stay with us
if you want.
Oh, no. No.
-I mean, no offense.
-No.
-I'd rather do my own thing.
-Of course.
Besides, you know how Pancorbo turned out.
We were going to spend a few days there,
but we stayed for two months.
Yolanda, please,
keep your eyes on the road!
Gorka, stop it! You're being sexist.
That's right! That's a sign of sexism.
You can't keep your hand
off that handgrip.
I just don't want us to crash, okay?
So keep your eyes on the road.
-Yolanda, what did I just say?
-It's okay.
-It'll be a second.
-Keep your eyes on the road.
-Give me the phone.
-No way. Don't tell me what--
God.
-Your nose.
-What a blow.
-I'm bleeding out.
-Look at me.
-Is it broken?
-I don't know.
-Is it broken? Red?
-It looks red.
-Do you feel dizzy? Follow my finger.
-No.
-Yolanda, please.
-Look into my eyes.
Are you okay?
Yes. I'm okay.
I'm great.
All right, then.
-If you're okay, let's go.
-Yeah, let's go.
I can't wait for you to meet Mr. Anselmo.
You'll see, he's an amazing person.
A role model. A saint.
What do you think? Pretty cool, huh?
Careful with that, Father.
They're devilishly dangerous.
Mr. Anselmo.
-Mr. Anselmo!
-What's up, Gorka?
Thanks.
Cover the girl.
Come on.
Let's go.
Come on.
Is the weather always like this?
It was sunny moments ago.
That's just a rain cloud.
It'll clear up soon.
Leave your stuff here.
-Gorka!
-Mr. Anselmo.
Little Gorka, it's so good to see you.
-It's been so long.
-Yeah.
How come you didn't even show up
for Saint Roch's celebrations?
-Well...
-Scared of coming back to Tellera?
You know it.
-What happened to your nose?
-It's nothing. Just a little accident.
Yolanda, come here so I can introduce you.
Anselmo Martnez de Salinas, town priest
and Tellera's spiritual mentor.
Yolanda Penedo, art historian.
Nice to meet you.
This is... Wow!
She specializes in heritage.
-She's the one you did your master's with?
-Yes.
Come on, let's go!
The Sanctuary of Our Lady of the Dull.
Sixteenth century. Basque Gothic style.
Inspired by the German hallenkirchen.
The altarpiece
is from the Proto-Renaissance period.
You still haven't received government aid?
They don't give a damn about us.
Well, Father, they sent us.
Thousands like you have come through here.
Most recently,
some archeologists from Vitoria.
Look at what they did to my church.
It's been like this for a year.
I'm very unhappy with them.
Especially with their boss,
Peio Etxeberria.
The paleographer?
Paleographer, archeologist, art historian.
A prominent figure. He was my teacher.
-So, did they find anything interesting?
-Just a few bones.
And the foundations of the old
Romanesque church. Or so they say.
What's wrong with you? You're bleeding.
Come to the sacristy.
Come on, you're bleeding!
-I'll be right back, Yolanda!
-Move.
Leave Yolanda alone.
Mr. Anselmo, there's no need.
Yolanda is waiting for me.
I'm not doing it for you.
You're spilling huge drops of blood.
It's gonna look like the Virgin
came to life.
Take off your jacket.
You're dripping all over.
I'll get you...
some absorbent cotton
and hydrogen peroxide,
and I'll clean up your wound.
Come on, sit down.
Nathalie, what the--
What are you doing here?
Sit here until your dizziness goes away.
I'll show Yolanda the temple myself.
Stay here on your own.
I heard you came to town
and I wanted to see you.
No.
I think we left things pretty clear
before I moved to Valladolid
for my master's.
-Let me take a look.
-No!
-It's going to get infected. Come on.
-No big deal.
Gently.
You didn't miss me, even a little?
No? You didn't?
Did you dress up as a Basque for me?
Come on, you know
that makes me horny as hell.
-Is Gorka okay?
-Yes, it's nothing. He's a whiner.
-I'll go check on him.
-No, wait! Look.
Did I show you this?
Look. This is the tombstone
of Gorka's ancestor,
Martn de Intxausti.
One of the greatest knights
of medieval Tellera.
Touch it.
Limestone.
Wait.
I have to go.
-Me, too.
-Of course.
-Be careful. That floor is rotten.
-Don't worry, Father. I'm a professional.
-That was close.
-You see?
Are you okay?
Yolanda.
Yolanda! Are you okay?
-Are you okay?
-Yes!
Yes, I'm okay.
I think.
What about the lehendakari? We need to go.
-You go. I'll stay and rescue the girl.
-Are you sure?
-Yes.
-All right.
-Call me if you need anything.
-Okay.
-Yolanda!
-Yeah.
Are you down there?
Mr. Anselmo, be careful.
Shit, Mr. Anselmo!
Yolanda. Yolanda, thank God.
-Are you okay? Are you hurt?
-Yes. No, I--
-Your head? Did you hurt your head?
-No, I'm okay.
I'm okay. Now I'm hurt.
Well, I'll be damned.
There's a hidden crypt beneath the church.
And archeologists didn't find it.
Crap! Careful.
In the name of the Father,
Son and Holy Spirit.
Don't!
Hey, over here!
Yolanda, look at this.
It looks like there's an epitaph.
It's in Latin.
Shit, the girl is good.
Yes. But what does that mean, Yolanda?
"Here lays Walterius..."
-Walterius?
-Walter.
"Son of Lord..."
No, "Son of the legendary
Lord of Tellera...
William Tell."
William Tell?
The liberating Swiss hero?
The one with the apple?
Well, I'll be damned.
William Tell.
It looks like there's something in there.
Mr. Anselmo, give me a hand.
Yolanda, give us light.
Help me.
-It won't budge.
-A little bit more.
I got it.
I think I can reach it. Yeah.
-No!
-No!
-No!
-What are you doing?
Gorka, no! If it contains a document,
it could vanish
when coming into contact with air.
You...
Here ends my political career.
The Basque Country
has turned its back on us.
Honey, come on. Let's go home.
I'm gonna make you
a finger-licking good tuna pot.
It'll cheer you up.
This is the end, boys. It is what it is.
-It is what it is.
-Mr. Anselmo, hold on.
Iker! Hey!
What, Gorka?
You picked a bad day
to come back to Tellera.
What's wrong?
I thought today was the big day.
You didn't hear?
-We're not Basque anymore!
-Shit, you can't be serious.
The lehendakari thinks
we're just a marching band.
All this fighting for the Basque Country
has been in vain.
I warned you, but you wouldn't listen.
"Let's ignore the priest."
-Come on, Iker, cheer up.
-This subject's just...
Listen, this is Yolanda.
She's in charge of inventory.
-Hi. What's up?
-Hey, Yolanda. Nothing much.
-Hanging in there.
-We have to go.
-Come on, Iker. Let's go.
-Yes, let's go.
Anyway, Gorka, come by the baserri
one day, and we'll catch up.
You can bring the girl if you want.
-For fuck's sake, let's go.
-Yes!
Come on, Iker, cheer up.
You can do it.
Don Anselmo, champ. What?
What you got there,
the baston for the korrika?
Pothead.
You won't stop speaking.
Look, there's my dad! Dad!
-Mom!
-Sweetheart!
When did you get here?
Son, you're so skinny.
-Hello. How are you?
-Who is this?
This is Yolanda, my partner.
She's in charge of inventory.
What happened to her?
Why is she all dirty?
-Excuse me.
-Yeah.
I thought you were working
with that Galician from your university.
It is her, Mom. And she's not Galician,
she's from Ponferrada.
That's what I said, Galician.
I don't like her one bit.
If only you would've treated
Nathalie right.
Will you stop pestering me about Nathalie?
She's such a sweet girl.
And she got a job at the town hall.
She's Dad's right hand.
And you quit your job.
And that dull girl?
She's not good enough for you.
You make a terrible couple.
She has a boyfriend.
I told you, she's my partner,
in charge of inventory. Period.
Thanks to your dad.
He kept bugging that guy
from the government of Castile-Len.
Mom, that's enough, okay?
That's enough.
-Where is she staying?
-At the Lucerna.
Good, because she's not welcome
in my house.
So, sweetie, you're staying with us, yeah?
No need to waste money.
I know your pay is shit.
Besides, the Lucierna Inn is a hellhole.
-Lucerna.
-Yeah, that.
-I--
-Dad. Dad!
Don't be upset about this.
You know politics bring
only disappointments.
Antoln. Maybe this isn't the right time,
but your son, this young lady and I
have made a discovery.
Yeah. Did you know there's a hidden crypt
in the Sanctuary of the Dull?
And a medieval tomb. We found this.
I don't give three shits about that.
Let's go, Anamari.
-But Dad--
-Leave him be. He's being impossible.
Just like when Athletic loses a game.
Antoln! Antoln, hold on.
You're going to slip!
Will you wait for me?
You're so pig-headed!
-This could change our town's history.
-I know that, Mr. Anselmo. I know.
Tell him... Antoln!
I don't understand that man.
UNIVERSITY OF THE BASQUE COUNTRY
LAVA CAMPUS
-What's up, Peio?
-What's up, Gorka?
Hello, good-lookin'.
-Let's go.
-But--
Three years digging in that fucking
sanctuary, and we don't find a thing.
Two suckers show up, and bam!
Right off the bat.
The working class definitely has no luck.
Listen, Burka.
That crazy priest who greeted us
with a Mauser rifle, is he still there?
Mr. Anselmo?
We should continue the excavation,
but who's going to dare go back there?
Listen, Peio. Sorry. Have I mentioned
that Yolanda is a heritage specialist?
I'm a fervent admirer of your work.
Yeah, well, I just got back
from the council office.
I'm always up a gum tree.
Come on, let's go to the lab.
Show me that thing you found.
-All yours.
-My, oh, my.
You take it. Go on.
-Shit. You bastards, you found it!
-What?
What I've been looking for in archives
and excavations for a long time.
This...
could change the history
of the Basque Country,
of Spain, and even Switzerland's!
It mentions Tellstadt as a Swiss canton
far off from the original territory.
Tellstadt?
Tell me, Gorka, what do you prefer,
fried bread or picatostes?
-It's a trick question, isn't it?
-That's right. They're the same thing.
Okay. Tellstadt and Tellera
are exactly the same.
Be it in Basque, German, Swiss or Romansh.
"The city of Tell."
Tell-herria. Tell-hiria.
Tellera. Tellera, God damn it.
All right, slow down, Peio. Slow down.
Are you telling me...
Are you telling us...
that my town, Tellera...
-is of Swiss origin?
-That's right, boy.
It once was a canton
that belonged to the Swiss Confederation
in the 14th century.
But I thought William Tell was a myth.
No. Wrong, young lady.
He did exist. But the one we should really
be interested in is his son, Walter Tell.
He annexed Tellera to Switzerland
as a distant canton.
Apparently, Tell helped
King Henry of Trastmara
fight against Peter the Cruel.
And as payment,
he gave him the town.
Like, "There you go."
So if it hasn't been revoked...
Tellera could... No, should
be Swiss.
I'll have a txakol, Bernab.
Wait. Make it a Rueda.
It comes from our sturdy Castilian land.
Come on, Bernab, it's Thursday.
I want my free pintxo.
Cheers.
God damn it, Revuelta,
quit being a pain in the ass.
You've been annoying everyone all morning.
-Hey there, Bernab.
-What's up, Antoln?
This is all his fault.
We should banish him.
The Basque Government
has turned its back on us because of you.
You'd better watch your words, Abarro.
Antoln has absolute majority
in the city hall
and he's working his ass off for Tellera.
He should work his ass off
to solve the town's problems.
We always get cut off when it snows.
We need a snowplow.
And the kids have to study in Vitoria.
When will you build a high school?
And what's up
with the broadcast translator?
My TV only gets TVE and ETB1.
Shit, I'm Basque,
but that doesn't mean I want to watch
pelota games and oxen pulling all day.
What do you want me to do
if both the Spanish and the Basque
have forsaken us?
You're the mayor.
If you can't solve any problems,
-then get the fuck out!
-Exactly.
Solve our problems,
and stop wasting time on nonsense.
Your dad should know about this, right?
I don't know how I'm gonna tell my mom
that you're staying at the Lucerna.
Don't change the subject.
There's a lot to discuss
about this discovery.
Everyone wants a piece of the cake,
but I'm the one who found it.
All right, we both did.
-But I was the one who fell in the crypt.
-You got lucky!
Yeah, I did!
Did his friend recover from that fall?
Yolanda? Ask her yourself.
You'll see her at dinner.
She seems nice, huh?
And don't worry, she has a boyfriend.
Some Portuguese photographer. A genius.
The only thing that worries me
is that the discovery of this tomb
may be the end of our racket.
Hey. How are you, Gorka? Long time no see.
-How are you?
-Right.
Yeah, definitely.
-Yeah.
-Hi.
Right! Nathalie, Yolanda.
Yolanda, Nathalie.
-How do you do?
-You took quite a spill, huh?
Gosh, does the whole town know?
-Do you feel better?
-Yeah.
Listen, Mr. Anselmo.
You're not going to believe this,
but we went to see Peio Etxeberria,
and he won't come back here.
He's terrified of you.
-Yeah, he says you threatened him.
-Me?
With a Mauser rifle.
I threatened him with a what?
-A Mouser?
-With a Mauser rifle.
I don't know what that is,
a Mounser or whatever.
No. What that archeologist needs to do
is seal the excavation
so no more people fall in it.
Come on, Anamari's steak
is waiting for us. Let's go!
Here's the steak.
That looks delicious.
Enjoy.
-Will you pass the bread?
-Sure.
Some potatoes.
Make some room for the peppers.
So, Mr. Anselmo,
aren't you going to say grace?
In the name of the Father, the Son,
and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Dig in! Meat isn't half as good
when it's cold. Come on.
You want some?
-Just a little.
-Come on.
-That's enough.
-Thanks.
-You don't like steak?
-Me?
No, I just don't eat meat.
I'm a vegan.
Jeez.
-I'll make you a salad.
-No.
There's salad in the kitchen. I'll get it.
-No. Sit down, honey. I'll go.
-No, but--
-It's all right.
-I can eat pepper and potatoes, and...
Do you have quinoa?
Here's the salad.
-Here you go.
-Thank you.
Thank you.
Nathalie, you sure love steak, honey.
I don't know what you do with it,
you look so fit.
Everything is delicious, Anamari.
As always.
I've missed us spending time all together.
-The tomb. We need to talk about the tomb.
-Yeah, honey.
What is it that you've found
in the sanctuary?
The tomb of William Tell's son.
The one who stole from the rich
and gave to the poor?
-That was Robin Hood, Mom.
-Jesus.
William Tell, Robin Hood. Same thing.
Excuse me.
Antoln, lighten up.
That discovery is great for our town.
I'm only interested in finding a solution
to our real problems,
not interested in nonsense.
The snowplow, the high school,
the broadcast translator station.
Dad, listen to me.
The document we found in the crypt says
-that Tellera could be Swiss.
-Just what we needed.
After the Basque let-down?
This is different.
Yolanda, explain it to him.
-It can be--
-Antoln, listen to our boy. He's right.
-We went to see Peio Etxeberria.
-That guy makes me sick.
The paleontologist?
But he's such a nice person.
Mom, he's a paleographer.
A paleographer and archeologist.
He's going to explain everything
tomorrow at the city hall, Antoln.
This is the document.
And it's perfectly legal.
In fact, there is no evidence
of it being revoked to date.
Which means that Tellera is,
for all intents and purposes,
a Swiss canton.
Swiss?
So we can request an annexation
into Switzerland?
-That's right.
-What?
Let's think about this for a minute.
We've been trying to be Basque
all our lives.
Maybe being Swiss is what's best for us.
We're not Swiss, we're Basque, damn it!
Yeah, we're Basque!
Wrong. Not you, Bernab.
You are not Basque.
You are Helvetian.
A Betis supporter, me?
My team is Athletic till I die!
Here. Your family tree is pretty clear.
Since your father passed away,
you are a direct descendant
of William Tell.
But all my family names are Basque.
-Tellera, Tellegorri, Telletxea.
-Bernab, hold on.
Being a descendant of William Tell
is not that bad.
-No, not bad at all.
-I'm gonna kill you!
Anyway, I should leave now. I'm...
They're waiting for me in the crypt.
And I have to examine the tomb.
-So...
-Mr. Anselmo, where are you going?
Me? I just wanted to thank
Mr. Peio Etxeberria for his wisdom.
You left my church looking like a mess.
-I will get you, you bastard.
-All right. Bye-bye.
For 700 years, we have been fighting
amongst ourselves.
Some said we're Basque.
Others said we're Castilian.
This document states it clearly.
We are Swiss!
The Basque don't want us.
And we don't want to be Castilian.
So let's compromise. Let's be Swiss.
Swiss? This is unbelievable.
-How on earth could we be Swiss?
-All right.
What would it mean for Tellera
to be a part of Switzerland?
No.
We would be part of one of the most
prosperous countries in the world.
No?
I'll put the technicalities aside.
Two words. Tax haven.
Mr. Anselmo, tell everyone
what you told me.
The Way of Tell.
From Altdorf to Tellera.
The tomb could be a tourist attraction.
A focal point of pilgrimage.
Like the Primitive Way, only better.
God! We'll make a killing!
-Get ready for us, Way of St. James!
-Have you lost your minds?
How are we gonna be part of a country
located at the other end of Europe?
Hang on a second.
-Pay attention to this.
-That's nice.
Here is Tellera. Here is Tenerife.
Fourteen hundred miles away.
And we belong to the same country.
Here is Tellera. Here is Switzerland.
Eight hundred miles away.
That's 600 miles closer.
Who says we can't be Swiss?
He's right. We're closer to Geneva
than we are to Lanzarote, Revuelta.
You don't know jack.
And you did your military service there.
All right. Now that we've solved
the technical issues, let's vote.
-Come on, Bernab.
-Yes?
The ballot boxes.
-Yes.
-Yes.
-No.
-No.
-Yes.
-Yes.
Antoln's resignation.
This is Abarro's handwriting.
Invalid vote.
-Carrying on. Yes.
-Yes.
No.
No.
-I don't give a fuck.
-You... Invalid vote.
-And yes.
-Yes.
The results of the voting are...
Invalid votes, 14.
Abstentions, 86.
Votes for "no" on the annexation, 157.
Votes for "yes," 599.
Well, complying with the people's mandate,
the city hall will begin
the application process
for the annexation to Switzerland.
What are you talking about?
They won't pay any attention to you.
Dad, calm down, okay?
We'll talk about it at home.
I have nothing to say to you.
-Hooray for democracy!
-Great.
BASQUE COUNTRY
TELLSTAD TELLSTADT, A NEW CANTON?
A tiny Spanish village
wants to become a member
of the Swiss Confederation.
Here is more information
from Hans Moser in Tell Town.
The grave of William Tells son Walter
was discovered in the town's church.
The Swiss government will send
a delegation to Tell Town,
to devise a plan for the potential
integration into the Swiss Confederation.
Will this become the 27th canton?
BERN - SWITZERLAND
FEDERAL PALACE
You're going to take off that hat,
aren't you?
Forgive me, Antoln but...
I've been wearing a txapela all my life,
and I love this hat.
It must be in my genes.
Follow me.
Mrs. President. Pleased to meet you.
As a descendant of the one
and only William Tell,
it is an honor for me to be
in front of the person
who rules the country of my ascentors.
Ancestors.
Will you shut up?
She can't understand you.
And she's not the president.
She's the Deputy
Secretary-General of State.
Take a seat.
The whole matter about Tellera
has generated sympathy
among the Swiss people.
You see? She can understand us.
We are studying the possibility
of bringing the tomb to Altdorf,
but it is too soon.
We have already talked to Yolanda Penedo,
the person who made the discovery.
What?
What we want is to be Swiss.
You must understand,
this entails a process that may take long.
Your people don't speak our languages,
your culture is different from ours,
and you are not in Switzerland.
In other words...
You are not Swiss.
Unimportant details.
Nathalie was born here. Bernab...
You can see the genes in his face.
He's a Tell from head to toe.
Besides, I know a few words
in Swiss already.
Nestl, Federer, Rolex, Shaqiri...
Ricola!
You do not look all that ready.
Our people are studying the matter.
In three months, we will go to Tellera
to begin a reflection process to--
Good! In three months, we'll be Swiss.
We will see that in three months.
Make the most of your trip
and get to know our beautiful city.
Auf Wiedersehen!
-Did it go well?
-I don't know.
-It went well.
-Good!
-Yolanda, slow down.
-Gorka, calm down.
Dude, I'm driving super slow.
You're driving too fast.
We're not in a hurry.
And we need to wait for Nathalie.
She'll be back from Switzerland soon.
-Nathalie is coming, too?
-Of course.
Iker, Nathalie and I
have been buddies forever.
At the dinner,
it looked like you were a couple.
No.
Well, yeah. I mean, we went out together.
But nothing has happened between us
in a long time.
I didn't mean...
-I mean, it was just a comment. I didn't--
-I know.
-I didn't mean to be nosy.
-I know, don't worry.
It's right there, to the left. There.
-Boy!
-Little guy.
-Hi!
-What's up, Iker?
Casillas!
Easy, lie down.
Sit!
He's totally under my control,
but lately he's being a little naughty.
-I can see that.
-All right. Let's go.
Come in, you two.
-Iker's dog...
-Casillas. He's named Casillas.
Basque Sorrow Number Three.
It shows the consequences
of the Basque conflict
in the consumer society.
I mean, it's obvious.
-It's obvious.
-It's obvious.
And this one... This one's really has a...
bird's soul.
Bird's soul.
It talks about social alienation
and panic in the welfare state.
It's my most commercial work, you know?
I just sold it to Otxandiano's batzoki.
No shit?
God damn it!
The entire house is filled with smoke.
This looks like an Altos Hornos furnace.
Don't piss me off, okay?
And don't make any noise.
I have an early morning.
Excuse me.
Yes, Fer?
Yeah, I know. What's wrong with me?
Do you really want to know?
You called me 20 times.
That's what's wrong with me.
I told you I couldn't talk. I'm working.
No!
Seriously, you've been away
for three months.
For three months. And you never called.
Now I'm the one who's away,
and it's a problem?
What?
-So, you and Yolanda, huh?
-What?
What?
Well... Yeah, right? I mean...
I don't know, man.
I'm totally hung up on her.
You dog. Well, I have my own thing
going on, too. It's...
You know what the problem is, Iker?
I don't know, my head is a mess.
Sometimes, I think... I don't know,
that maybe I have feelings for...
-Shit, Nathalie!
-You're getting high as hell, aren't you?
-Am I too late for dinner?
-Hi. How are you?
-How did things go in Switzerland?
-How did it go in Switzerland?
-Switzerland.
-Good.
You and I have to talk.
Outside. Now.
Come on, help me set everything up.
Let's have dinner outside.
It's a beautiful, beautiful night.
-What's up?
-Nothing. Are you okay?
-Yeah, I'm okay. Just a little cold.
-Do you need a blanket?
That would be great.
Great. Yes, I see you're feeling great
in Tellera after your discovery.
You discoverer.
-I don't follow you.
-I spoke to the Swiss.
And I want everything related to them
to be run by the city hall.
Shut up!
Yeah, but I don't work for you.
The regional government ordered
the inventory. They are my bosses.
And let me remind you that this is Castile
until proven otherwise.
What about Gorka?
Why didn't you tell him anything?
I didn't tell him
because there was no time.
-Right.
-What do you mean, "right"?
-I was going to tell him later.
-I'm going to tell him now, don't worry.
-Gorka!
-What is your problem?
I don't like the way you're talking to me.
Look, honey, this is Tellera.
You'd better follow the rules.
-What rules? You--
-Someone say my name?
-You shut up!
-You shut up!
Shut the hell up!
Citizens of Tellera.
As your mayor,
there is something I'd like to say to you.
And what I want to say...
is that the Swiss want us.
We are their priority!
Excellent.
In three months,
we will adapt to their culture.
It's not that complicated.
We'll just have to make
small changes in our cooking,
adapt to their schedules,
and slowly start speaking
Swiss German correctly.
Unimportant details.
Swiss German? You people have been nagging
about speaking Basque for 30 years
and no one here can speak it.
-Speak for yourself. You're from Laredo.
-I'm from Colindres, you ignorant fool.
Colindres, Laredo, Castro...
They all belong to Santander.
Castro isn't Basque?
Listen. The Swiss want us to adapt
to their legal
and administrative structure so that--
Look, it's Bernab!
He looks like the jack of clubs!
The alphorn is hard to play,
but you'll get used to it.
Carry on, Antoln.
Citizens of Tellera,
let's join together and make Tellera
the 27th canton!
Bravo! Bravo!
-Long live Switzerland!
-Hurrah!
BASQUE LANGUAGE SCHOOL
SWISS LANGUAGE SCHOOL
Willkommen in Tellstadt.
A small town located in the heart
of the Iberian Peninsula
of Swiss history, culture and sentiment.
Come with me in this incredible journey
through the little Switzerland.
I live in the little Switzerland
In a place called Tellstadt
Postcard-beautiful mountains
And lakes all around
It's where a discovery was made
That's going to change our history
And it brings us closer to William Tell
We want to be
A part of Switzerland now
And then we'll all come together and shout
An idyllic place of peaceful
and cheerful people
who keep their culture alive.
It may be a little Switzerland,
but it has a giant heart!
It looks great. Now just edit out the part
when I fell down and post it online.
But it's already on--
Swiss German.
-Antoln is very good at it.
-He really is.
-And he looks so handsome in that outfit.
-No.
Look how handsome.
Pour me some white wine.
-What is this?
-Noirillon Salvagnin.
From the canton of Vaud.
Just pour me a cup of Rueda.
But we only have Swiss wines.
No free pintxo, either? It's Thursday.
They don't do free pintxos in Switzerland.
-Right. I see they're only for friends.
-They paid for those.
-What the fuck is this shit?
-Noirillon Salvagnin.
-I want a txakol! Numbnuts.
-We only have Swiss wines.
Damn it all to hell.
Who the fuck closed the pelota court?
You ever hear of people
playing pelota in Switzerland?
Antoln.
This is not Switzerland.
-This is the Basque Country!
-And Castile.
No more Basque rural sports.
Skiing is Switzerland's sport.
Gstaad, St. Moritz, Tellera.
Our town will be crowded with celebrities!
Carolina, Mette-Marit,
Preysler and her playwright.
Maybe I'll be on Hola! magazine.
-Come on. Peace.
-We don't eat that shit.
Let's get out of here.
I'm too mad for this.
We'll put an end to this.
Very soon, Antoln. Very soon.
Even if it's only symbolic,
it's good to delineate our borders.
SWITZERLAND
TELLERA
Make sure it's straight.
-Look at this.
-Come here.
Come. Come here.
This way. All this way up until here.
What do you think?
What is this, Bernab?
Yeah, I know he's missing the spear.
But don't worry, it'll be here tomorrow.
I'm amazed.
We've been independent for one day
and you've already managed to get
a pastoral visit from the Pope.
You rock.
Let's walk, come on. March.
Yes, this is it.
Excuse me?
This is not Switzerland.
We do not have a special taxation system.
How should I know?
Call back when Tellera is independent.
Which I doubt will happen!
Yeah, all right. Goodbye.
-I'd like to update my bank book.
-Can you believe this, Mr. Anselmo?
That's the fifth guy that wants
to deposit his undeclared money here.
Even Cristiano Romario's lawyer called.
Can you believe it?
Update my bank book and don't bother me
with nonsense, Abarro.
I'll update it right away, Mr. Anselmo.
Tellera will never be Swiss.
LUCERNA INN
The Swiss offered me a contract.
And I'm considering staying.
You're staying?
We can both stay,
if you don't mind working for them.
In fact, I told Peio about it,
and he thinks
it's a really good opportunity for us.
But what about the rest of the inventory?
We still need to go to Fras.
Okay.
Would you rather be bored to death
in Fras,
or conduct a research that will bring us
fame, reputation, money--
Yes, Yolanda, all of that sounds great.
And when we're done with the research,
we can go to Switzerland
and take the tomb with us.
No, not with the tomb.
Think about it.
What about the Way of Tell?
Mr. Anselmo would be very upset.
And my dad. And everyone. No.
Gorka, the whole annexation thing...
The Swiss don't give a crap about it.
-They just want the tomb.
-And you're going to help them?
Are you listening to yourself?
How can you be so selfish?
-Selfish?
-Yeah!
How can you be such a sucker?
This annexation thing
isn't going anywhere.
I'm sorry to be the one to tell you,
but the Swiss don't care about you.
Look, Yolanda...
It's great that you want to pursue
your dreams,
your ambitions and your career.
That's what I like most about you.
Just don't do it at the expense
of others, okay?
Especially at the expense of my people.
Arratsalde on.
Good afternoon.
-Arratsalde on, God damn it!
-Good fucking afternoon!
I don't like you, and you don't like me.
But there are things we dislike even more.
Tellera annexing to Switzerland.
That would be one.
I don't get why they insist
on making this town a part of Switzerland.
We have nothing in common.
SPAIN AND SWITZERLAND
CAN'T REACH AN AGREEMENT ON TELLERA
Yeah, all right. I'll hold.
NEW PRIORITY MISSION:
OPERATION TELLERA
Hello?
It's the radio people.
Sure, I'll put you through.
Democracy will not be beaten.
Hello?
Well...
Democracy will not be beaten.
In Switzerland, there is no place
for violent people.
No, that's all. No further comments.
Thank you.
"Flagen. Flagen."
Forty-five minute late.
Note. The situation in Tellera
is far worse than we expected.
Terrorist attacks,
language immersion,
the Basque issue all over again...
Shit, this is a powder keg.
THIS IS NOT SPAIN
OF COURSE NOT, DUMBASS, IT'S A WALL
YEAH, BUT IT'S A SWISS WALL
Hi. I'm Yolanda Penedo, art historian.
Leave your message...
Hey, there.
Where are you going?
You can't come in. No visits today.
Hi. I'm a photographer
from National Geographic.
I've come a long way
to do an article on the tomb.
I don't care if you're from Intervi.
Come back next week if you want.
-All right, thank you.
-Bye.
So, how's the couple doing?
We are not a couple.
Hello.
One Merovingian goblet. Move the tablet.
Yes.
-One Visigoth bell with no clapper.
-Gorka--
Gorka, working like this is a pain.
Seriously, do you want us to be mad
at each other?
One reliquary casket.
What kind of equipment?
Precision rifles?
I may still have a couple.
I'd need to check.
Have the advance payment ready.
Bye.
-And one golden cross--
-And that's all! Enough!
What I meant to say yesterday was
let's go to Switzerland together.
To Switzerland, to Cochinchina,
Montenegro, South Sudan, I don't care.
I just--
I just want to be with you.
There, I said it.
I'll be right back.
Yolanda, I've been waiting for you
to say that all this time.
It's perfect!
You, me...
Walter Tell's putrefied corpse...
-Fernando?
-Yolanda?
Oh, come on!
How did this happen, Fer?
Did you get your fingers
caught in something?
I thought I told you not to come in.
-I was looking for Yolanda, my girlfriend.
-You said you wanted to take photos.
The magazine sent me here
to do an article,
and Yolanda turned out to be here as well.
-Oh, really?
-No!
No, seriously. We haven't seen each other
for four months, and you show up now?
Yeah! What are you doing here?
You stay out of it.
Hey, you're Koldo! From her master's.
Gorka.
That's great! You're working with Koldo?
-Gorka!
-Gorka!
Seriously. When you're told
you can't come in,
you can't come in.
That sign is pretty clear.
I don't get people.
No, leave me alone.
-What's wrong with you?
-We'll talk later.
-Who is that with Yolanda?
-It's her boyfriend.
A travel photographer.
A weird guy. Lusitanian.
You've got to be kidding. Fucking Fernando
showing up just now. Awesome.
-Bye.
-Bye.
-What's up with him?
-I don't know.
Sign here, please.
-Good evening.
-Good evening.
You're working late.
We're done now.
Baby, what would you like for dinner?
-Should I make you a bonito omelette?
-No, I had a few snacks.
I left Iker and Abarro alone.
The opposition, face to face.
You know what?
I'm going to bed. I'm worn out.
And I think while I was in the sanctuary
I may have pulled a muscle on my back.
-Let me see.
-No, it's okay, Nathalie. No need.
Antoln. Let's go to bed.
Hang on, they're showing
all the goals from Division 2.
You can watch that upstairs
on your tablet.
-It'll just take a second.
-No, it won't.
The other night I waited an hour for you.
I was bored to death.
Come on. Go to bed.
-Good night.
-Good night.
-Right here?
-Right there, yes.
Can you feel it?
Right there, it's a huge muscle knot.
-The sanctuary is keeping you busy, right?
-Yeah, the whole Walter thing--
-Is your friend still mad?
-Yeah. She'll get over it. I think.
Be careful. Don't let her
leave you out of the Swiss thing.
No!
No, I was very clear with her.
We made this discovery together.
Right.
What's going to happen between us,
now that you're staying longer?
What do you mean, "between us"? You and I?
-No.
-No?
No.
What are you doing?
I'm not leaving until my work is finished.
Things are going to get very ugly here.
You're gonna have to listen to me.
Your work is secondary.
Excuse me?
Secondary?
Fer, this is the opportunity of my life!
-My future depends on Tellera.
-Well, you have to trust me.
How am I gonna trust you?
I haven't heard from you in months!
Dude, this has been going on
for a long time.
I'm tired of you.
Believe me when I say
things are going to get ugly in this town.
Things will get ugly
if you don't tell me right now
where you've been for the last months.
I already told you, I was in Namibia!
Taking photographs
of the Kalahari bushmen.
What, there was no signal in Namibia?
You couldn't drop me
an email from Namibia?
Phone signal in Namibia, with the bushmen?
-Come on, are you kidding?
-What are you, a secret agent?
You're shitting me.
You're telling me that you work
for the CNI?
We can't talk about that, okay?
Unbelievable.
Turns out I've been going out
with Mort & Phil
and I find out this late in the movie.
Unbelievable.
Come on, baby.
You know you're the reason
I'm in Tellera.
You know how much I love you.
Should we spend the night here
and leave tomorrow?
No, I'm not going anywhere.
-You're not?
-No.
What if I told you that the priest
has a chest full of guns and explosives
in his sacristy? What then?
-Mr. Anselmo?
-That's right.
Yeah, right.
I hope you have a good reason
for making me get out of bed this early.
I do have a good reason.
I was told
you're hiding a stash of guns
and explosives in here.
-Let me guess who told you.
-That is irrelevant.
You either tell me what's going on,
or I tell everyone
and put an end to your scheme!
Listen, my child. Do not raise your voice
at me in the house of the Lord.
And don't assume the worst.
This is not what it looks like,
and there's an explanation.
I was walking in the forest
a few months ago,
looking for mushrooms
to make myself some scrambled eggs.
Because I love chanterelles
with some garlic, chili pepper,
-with a good organic egg...
-Get to the point, Father.
I was about to collect a perretxiko
when I saw something.
You found an ETA cache?
Intact. Unsoiled. Pristine.
So I had two options.
Either go to the police,
-or try to sell the guns.
-What?
-To the Chechens, or the Arabs.
-What?
But that's not all. I'm leaving the cache,
and guess who I run into.
-Who?
-Nathalie.
Yeah, what a surprise.
She followed me. She wanted to know
where I get my mushrooms.
No one knows about that place.
Because, let me tell you,
I'm a mushroom enthusiast.
-I may be a priest, but I--
-Okay, Father.
You're beating around the bush.
Continue, please.
Try to understand.
Look at what they've done to my church.
Twenty kilos of ammonal would cover
the window panes to seal the excavation.
Otherwise, who's going to pay
for this mess?
-Thank you
-Welcome.
I had to come to an agreement
with Nathalie.
Half for the city hall,
half for the church.
Does Gorka know?
Gorka?
Nathalie might have told him,
now that they're back together.
They're together?
Yes.
All right.
-I have to... I'm leaving.
-Sure.
-Bye.
-Bye.
-Why are you with Abarro?
-Well, if it isn't the couple of the hour.
You finally got what you wanted.
So, involved in capital flight, are we,
Abarro?
Shouldn't it be the other way around,
now that we're going to be Swiss?
Go to hell, Intxausti.
You're even dumber than your dad.
You're both being hornswoggled by her
and you don't even know about it.
This fool.
-You've lost your minds with all this.
-Yeah.
Bye, Nathalie.
-Where are you going?
-Inside.
-No.
-No?
Look, Nathalie...
I don't know what's going to happen
from this point on.
Is it because of what Abarro said?
No. I don't give a shit
what Abarro says.
Nathalie, you know I've always liked you.
And I love you a bunch.
-But...
-You like Yolanda.
You're in love with her, aren't you?
Yes.
Shit! You scared me!
What the hell is this?
What are you two doing together?
You can't stand each other.
So you want to blow up
William Tell Junior's tomb.
-Are you nuts?
-All the Swiss care about is the tomb.
They don't give a damn
about anything else.
Without the mausoleum
of William Tell's son,
what does our town have
that could interest them?
-Nothing.
-Nothing.
No. I'm chilling now
and I don't want any trouble. I...
Besides, why the hell
don't you do it yourselves?
No, right now I'm...
super focused on my work and going through
an awesome creative phase.
I just can't. I...
How about now?
I was going to sell that
to the community center in Apamonasterio!
To hell with that sculpture.
Now you'll have to focus
on the fight for Euskadi.
-And for Spain. Don't forget.
-All right.
-No, I can't do this to Nathalie.
-Do what?
Betray her now that we're going out.
We're going to be family, Revuelta!
Forget about my daughter.
She's with Gorka.
But she can't be going out with Gorka.
Gorka is going out with Yolanda.
Well, Anamari is telling everyone
that they're back together.
And that they hooked up
the other night at his place, right?
They hooked up?
There, now it looks better.
All right. I'm in.
-Antoln.
-Hold on.
I'm not even gonna ask. Mr. Mayor.
That's Canton President.
Stay still.
I talked to Heidi.
They're bringing everything forward.
The Swiss will be here in one week
to legalize the procedure.
-One week?
-But that's not what we talked about.
The Spanish government
refuses to negotiate.
They are sure about this
and want to come right away.
-Shit!
-Right away?
What do you mean, "right away"?
But my Swiss German is still very sloppy.
We should have picked Romansh.
Nobody can speak that.
-God!
-Tell me, Nathalie...
Be honest, okay?
Do you think we are ready?
There are a few issues
we need to solve first.
Abarro refuses to accept
suspicious funds in the bank.
Shit!
My father wants to move the inn
to Miranda.
Flight of companies. They're trying
to economically strangle us.
-All right, that's enough. Enough. No!
-It's just...
-Let's focus. Okay?
-Shit!
First off, we're going to set up
a nice welcoming committee for them.
What are you doing?
Hey, stop that! Stop! What are you--
-Holy shit!
-Are you crazy?
You can't go through.
What do you mean we can't go through?
I need to talk to Nathalie.
She's my niece. Tell her Pascual is here.
Pascual Revuelta.
Go.
-Hey, Iker. What is it?
-Hi, Anamari. Is Gorka home?
Yes, he's inside, watching Saber y ganar.
-Come in.
-Thank you.
-I'll be upstairs, okay?
-All right.
-Automatization.
-I can't believe it.
Hey, Iker! Epic. They just showed
the Saber y ganar rap again.
-No!
-Yeah!
-Knowing and winning
-Knowing and winning...
It's so good. You bastard.
Shit! Iker, what the fuck, man?
Why don't you ask Nathalie? Fart face.
What?
Uncle Pascual, it's enough
that I have to argue with my dad,
I don't want to argue with you.
You're not even going
to give me a kiss, Nathaly?
My name is not Nathaly, I'm Nathalie.
And no, I won't.
All right, Nathalie.
I don't want any trouble, okay?
Your dad moved to Switzerland
because he damn pleased.
Besides, I'm here on duty.
I'm going to make sure
Tellera doesn't turn into a powder keg.
Tellera is going to become
part of Switzerland.
-Switzerland? Damn--
-Yeah.
Great, just what we needed now.
-Did you call them?
-Why would I call these guys?
-Hey.
-What's up?
The lehendakari sent us
to impose order in this ruckus.
Who here is Nathalie?
It's obvious I'm not Nathalie.
Shit, you're Pascual. How are you, man?
-Shit, Gorrotxategi. How are you?
-Same old. Good.
-Yeah. A lot of work lately, huh?
-I'll say.
We need to fix this soon, or...
Nathaly! Nathalie!
Come on, don't tell me
you believe what the priest said.
I don't know who to believe anymore.
-Who else would you believe? Me!
-You?
-Yeah, right!
-Yola.
You didn't know Iker was going out
with Nathalie before you came back?
How should I have known that, Mom?
I'm always the last to find out
about everything in this town.
Yolanda! Yolanda, hold on, please!
-Yolanda.
-Great, and now you.
What happened to you? No, don't tell me.
-Nathalie slapped you in the face?
-Will everyone stop mentioning Nathalie?
I'm not going out with Nathalie.
I've moved on.
It didn't look like you had moved on
when you slept together the other night.
Get your head straight, son.
Is there a problem?
Who is this?
Let's get out of this fucking crazy town.
This place is not for us. Come on.
Who are you calling crazy, fart face?
You and your damn mom.
My baby is not crazy!
Mom, no!
No. Stop!
Mom, please, stop!
That's enough. Enough, Mom!
Stop it!
Let's go, Fer.
Fifty, as usual?
No. Today I need...
something else.
Speed, coke, meth, special K, happy pills,
-heroin--
-Let's take it slow.
Marijuana?
Later, maybe...
But no. This is about something else.
Talk to the boss about that.
You can't have that in here!
What are you, stupid?
Relax, uncle.
The detonator's under control.
Iker!
Damn your skull, Iker.
Do not play with that.
So, a cup of coffee?
DEAR YOLANDA,
YOUR POST-DOCTORAL SCHOLARSHIP REQUES FOR THE UNIVERSITY OF FLORENCE
HAS BEEN APPROVED.
We should spend the night in Vitoria.
Things here are too weird. I don't know
how you put up with these people.
Fer!
I got it! The scholarship!
-The post-doctoral in Florence!
-That's great, my love!
You're not just beautiful,
you're just as smart.
Yeah!
But what am I gonna do?
This is in Florence,
and the Swiss want me there.
I think it's obvious.
Florence, Switzerland.
What is there to think about?
Let's go home. We'll be together.
You can support me.
I need you now more than ever.
You need me?
No. I mean...
Now that things are working out for me...
I care about my job, you know?
I'm sure of that.
Have you not partied enough
with all this inventory thing?
-Partied?
-Yes.
That's how much you care about my job?
Is it? Just about as much
you care about me, right?
This is not a job.
Come on, looking at saints in churches?
You've got to be shitting me.
Are you being serious right now?
Yolanda...
Get out.
I'm sorry.
-Get the fuck out.
-I just--
Go away! I don't want to see you.
This is over. This is over.
You're kicking me out?
-That's right. I'm sick of you.
-All right.
Well, just so you know,
you always had a bad temper.
I don't want to see you again!
Fuck!
Shit, Nathalie, you startled me.
Are you trying to kill me?
Is that everything?
Yes, let's go.
All right.
You still have to tell me
how they found out.
What is Nathalie doing here?
-She told me she was going to see you.
-Me?
And I knew you were coming with me, so...
I should've put a leash on her.
Come on.
Damn it, it's locked.
How are we gonna get in?
Using the key!
My seven years as an altar boy
weren't in vain.
Let's go.
GORKA - I'LL MISS YOU TOMORROW
WHEN THE SWISS GET HERE.
YOLANDA - I'M STAYING.
SEE YOU TOMORROW.
WHAT ABOUT FERNANDO?
IT'S OVER.
BESIDES, I GOT THE SCHOLARSHIP
FOR FLORENCE.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO...
FLORENCE, SWITZERLAND...
I'D GO ANYWHERE WITH YOU.
WILL YOU COME WITH ME?
All done.
-Antoln, time to sleep.
-No.
-Tomorrow is a very important day.
-Let me--
-No, let me finish watching--
-Please. Antoln!
Come on.
Good night.
WILLIAM TELL
Answer me, Gorka.
You're such a pain, Fer.
In case it wasn't obvious...
I love you.
I love you more.
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
We're back in Tellera
for another historic day.
The day when this Castilian town
of Basque culture will become Swiss.
-Go Switzerland!
-Go!
You must be excited, Mr. Mayor.
Canton President.
Indeed, very excited.
This is an important day
for Tellera, isn't it?
Tellstadt.
Tellstadt.
Yes, very important, because we...
We are Swiss.
Because of our culture, our sentiment,
our--
And like you always say,
Mr. Canton President,
because of the banks.
Bernab, come over here for a second.
We need to arrange these people
before the Swiss get here.
-You go over there. Far from here.
-Yes. Great.
-All right.
-And you go over there, Anamari.
The president is coming!
He's coming! Antoln!
-You gotta fix that.
-No, let's not do this now.
Come on.
Let's do this!
Where's the president?
They sent Heidi.
She has no authority. This smells fishy.
After all the trouble we went through
to get the press here, they send her.
-She's so uptight!
-God damn it!
Let's not panic. Stick to the plan.
Welcome to Tell Town.
What's going on here?
Are you celebrating the town fair?
Sorry, Mr. Intxausti,
could I speak to you in private
for a minute?
In private?
What we need to discuss here
is something the entire town
and all of Switzerland should hear.
-This way.
-Please.
Long live Switzerland!
-Go Switzerland!
-Go!
Go!
-Shut off that microphone!
-Shit.
The Swiss president
couldn't make it today.
But Mrs. Mller-Gomes
is here as his representative
to legalize what we've always known.
That we were, we are,
and will always be Swiss.
Mrs. Mller-Gomes will speak now.
Hello.
As you all know, we have always been
of the opinion that Tellstadt
is a part of Switzerland.
-Long live Switzerland!
-However,
I must announce
there has been an alteration.
-Switzerland is going to invest...
-Look, everything's ready.
-a lot of money in Spain.
-Come on. Hey!
We have reached an agreement
with the government of Spain
which will satisfy every one of us.
What the fuck do we care about Spain?
Same fucking story once again.
We're only interested in Tellera!
I don't understand you guys.
You used to be fighting all the time,
and now you're like common-law partners.
Those two clowns.
Hey, what did we miss?
Just this Helvetian talking nonsense.
Governments from both countries
are going to work together
to ensure you have everything you need.
But for that to happen,
we need something from you.
Anything.
We want to take Walter Tell's tomb
to Switzerland, where it belongs.
What is she talking about?
But it's already in Switzerland, honey.
In the little Switzerland.
That tomb isn't going anywhere
even if God himself comes to get it!
Hit it.
Get inside!
Iker!
Stay calm. Everything is under control.
There was a bomb.
-What about the tomb?
-It's unscratched.
I took the bomb, started running...
and threw it on the open field.
Nathalie, I love you...
like hell.
And I'll become Swiss if that's
what it takes for you to like me.
He's even dumber than last week.
Can you believe it?
Bernab, there's something
really important I need to tell you.
Iker.
What is he doing?
-You're okay.
-Iker!
-Iker!
-Holy crap. Damn.
-Bernab.
-Yes. What is it?
Those sheep in the field...
-They were yours, right?
-Yeah, why?
Well, you should know...
that you don't really have them anymore.
Shit.
-Oh, my.
-Let's go.
What happened?
-Listen.
-Yeah?
What you said before...
Nathalie...
I love you.
ONE YEAR LATER
And here we are. Rockin' it.
Mr. Anselmo is happy
now that the sanctuary is repaired.
Nathalie and him bought a bus
to get the tourists here.
Revuelta and my uncle are inseparable.
The whole town calls them
common-law partners.
Or lawless partners.
Bernab started planting apple trees.
I guess it's in his genes.
Antoln still has absolute majority
in the city hall,
while Anamari sorts out
his "unimportant details."
Gorka got to be a contestant
on Saber y ganar
and was eliminated the first day.
He and Yolanda have become famous
giving conferences all over the world.
And even though we're still
a Castilian town with Basque culture,
Tellera was, is, and will always be,
the little Switzerland.
I forget that you don't love me
Especially on Fridays
Especially on Fridays
Don't answer my messages
I don't deserve your attention
I don't deserve your attention
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I forget that you don't love me
Especially on Fridays
Especially on Fridays
Don't answer my messages
I don't deserve your attention
I don't deserve your attention
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
I apologize
You don't have to talk to me
I apologize for not being better
Than anyone
Look at him.
-Disgusting.
-Cut.
Sorry. Hold on a second.
Come on. God damn it!
Inspired by the German hallenkirchen.
The pussy is from the Renaissance period.
Yolanda Penedo, art historian...
Yeah. Art hist... I can't.
Cut.
...visited by the lehen...
Shit.
Cantabria is a recent invention.
I guess that's all.
Where are you from?
-Cut.
-I forgot what's next.
-I'll destroy your entire office.
-Cut.
Cut.
Who are you calling crazy, Ricky Martin?
Cut.
Would you like some anchovies?
-Cut.
-Go get them.
They're getting high smoking this blunt.
Cut.
Shit.
-The door's open.
-Great, then.
Where have you been all this...
-Where do you live?
-It's all Greek to me.
That's beautiful!
Keep going.
-Cut.
-What about the tomb?
Subtitle translation by Arturo Fernndez