The Mend (2014) Movie Script
1
- Hey.
- Hey.
- How's it...
- What?
What's going on... Am I
missing something? What?
Let me take a shower.
Five minutes.
You think about me
getting all wet and soapy.
I'll shower with you.
Ronnie's here.
- Who cares?
- Hey.
I need your help sometimes, and
you need mine. Just ask me...
You want me to tell you
to shut your mouth?
I'll tell you to shut
your mouth.
Get out! Get the fuck
out of here! Go!
Who the fuck do you
think you are?! Go!
Get your shit, and
get out of here! Go!
Go blow your head off... And do it from the
back so that your fucking face disappears...
Get out of here! Go!
Go! Get out! Go!
Go!
Hey... You can't sleep here.
Do you have an outlet?
Whoa, whoa! What the fuck
are you doing, man?
You can't do that.
It's not that serious.
It's completely disconcerting.
You're being ridiculous,
this is, this is ridiculous.
- You're a liar!
- I just wanted to take a shower.
It was an hour before people got
here and we had to leave time
for you to put your socks on
for twenty-five minutes.
No, don't, don't change the conversation.
We're talking about one thing.
Well, what the fuck, I had a lot of
stuff rattling around in my head.
I'm sorry I didn't make
the right expression
when you tried to shoot
cum all over my face.
The right expression?
You swatted my dick away,
like it was a hornet's nest.
Well, don't try to come on my face like
it's something I've suddenly signed off on.
I didn't try to come on your... I pointed... I
pointed it down at your breasts... You said,
"come on my tits",
so I pointed it at your...
You know how I get... When I'm about to
come I would like to look into your eyes
and see that you're feeling
something, you know...
That you're in the moment, just...
Ten minutes of performance.
Lie to me, convince me that you might
possibly be, you know, excited about my dick.
Well, I wasn't in the
moment because you were...
You're not listening.
I have to do a lot of things. You know,
I'm, I'm running around with a list,
I'm vacuuming and buying
fucking limes,
and you're puttering around staring
into shadows like Abraham Lincoln.
What are you doing? Alan!
Alan, you want to look me in the
eyes and shoot cum in them? Look...
When we land tomorrow...
And we get in that nice hotel
you got a great deal on,
I'll draw a hot bath, and... We'll
put on your trip playlist, and...
Light some candles, and you can blow all the
cum you want all over my body, and I'll laugh,
like a fucking lunatic, okay?
You're choosing not to understand.
You could understand.
Give me a break. I'm sorry, babe,
but this is really stupid, okay?
Hey... oh my God.
You're so, you're... Cool.
We wanted to say hi before
we have to get her home.
Oh, you're leaving now? You just got
here, we didn't really get to...
She's tired.
Shit. Cool.
Two blocks down
and two blocks up.
Two blocks that way?
- Yes, sir.
- And then to the left?
Yes.
"He should just grab
me and show me."
"Raise your head, lift
your arm, turn this way."
Yeah, but that's so literal.
Thank you so much for coming,
and bringing the little one.
- Let me just open this for you.
- Oh, sure.
- Alright, bye! See you! See you.
- Bye.
You missed the baby.
I'm heartbroken.
Here, you just gotta...
- Where'd you learn that?
- Law school.
The horn guys were just sort of
staring at the ground, you know,
and then he came up, and
he just rambled on about...
You know, how we have
to be political,
like freedom to do this and that.
It was kind of wild.
- Why, why don't you sit down?
- I'm good, I'm fine.
Well, anyway, so he got up there, and
he drew this out for an eternity
about how we're all one people.
And then some guy just got up
and yelled at him to play
another song...
But, by that time,
the contract had been broken.
The fun was completely over.
- Oh! Shit!
- I'm sorry!
Why did you do that?
You're always spilling things.
- Everything alright?
- Shit. They found me.
Everyone's so fascinated
by that helicopter. -Yeah.
Helicopter.
What about those girls over there?
Are they fussy?
Like fussy ballerinas?
They're women, not girls. -I just wanna
jam my fingers in that bun on her head.
It looks kind of like a
duckpin bowling ball.
You know, the naked yearning coming out of
you is getting a little tough to stomach.
The walls aren't your goddamn journal.
And you can't stick your fingers
- in a duck pin bowling ball.
- Excuse me.
That's asinine.
And now Farrah left.
- Mat's here?
- What?
Mat's on the couch.
Farrah!
Oh! Hi! You guys, you guys, I've
been seeing you from afar...
Hey, nice dress. -Thanks!
A friend made it for me.
Help yourself to drinks!
I think you were wearing that
same shirt
- the last time we saw you.
- I don't know.
It's been three months.
You should change.
Are those fish on your dress?
- You have fish on your dress.
- Sardines.
- They're sardines.
- Sardines... interesting.
Hey, who is that girl
over there, the one with the...
- Like the, uh, cantaloupe on her head?
- Will you hand me those pillows?
I want to make sure
everyone's comfortable.
Do you have scotch?
- Her name is Elinor...
- Elinor.
And she hates her body.
You should be fine.
- Are you behaving?
- I think so! Really?
Excuse me, can you pass me my bag?
That's my bag.
Oh! Sorry.
This is good, I was just
going to say hi. -Hey.
You're back from Chicago?
Are you in New York now?
Huh? -I'm sorry, I'm David.
We've met before.
- I'm an old friend of Alan's.
- Oh yeah. Hey. Hi.
- How's the website?
- Uh, which one?
You forgot. It's okay.
You were going to do this site for me for this
animation class I teach at Columbia prep.
Because I thought it would be fun. We
were e-mailing back and forth about it.
Yeah. -And you went to...
you were in Chicago, right?
- And you didn't have access to something.
- Yeah, yeah. Sure.
- Sure.
- Yeah. It's fine.
I did put, like, down for it...
It was actually my own money.
- I don't mean to corner you...
- You know, it's not even...
- It's a down payment.
- Yeah.
Yeah, let me send you something.
I don't know if we need it anymore
because I'd kind of given up...
- Hey, hello?
- Okay.
Yeah, how're you doing?
No, not really.
Deep inside, I believe that
this world we live in
is really a big, huge,
monumental,
symphonic orchestra.
What is this music?
Oh goddammit.
And in its primordial form,
all of creation is sound.
It's not just random sound.
It's music.
Who said that? Michael Jackson.
- Is that what you're saying?
- I'm not saying that at all.
Hey! Don't bother people, okay?
I'm not bothering him. I thought
he might have a menthol,
he thought I might have
some cocaine.
Fucking mouse! Goddamn it.
Are you serious? -Mouse? I
thought this dump was clean.
Oh, cause really you know
what clean is, mat.
Let's go in the living room. -Can
I have that cigarette? Thank you.
He's lucky we keep the guns
in our country home.
- I hate mice.
- Yeah, me too.
You mind if I?
Strange air in here.
Yeah, it's a dance company
and some people from work.
Kind of a funny mix. Yeah, I can
definitely tell who your friends are.
- Yeah.
- Hey.
- You guys were fascinating tonight.
- Fascinating?
They ended their season tonight.
This guy Mickey was in this duet
where he was like a wild bronco
being tamed, it was...
- That sounds like torture.
- Yeah.
It's not for everyone. -Yeah,
cause I'm a fucking philistine.
- Are you having fun?
- I'm having so much fun.
- Are you sure?
- Yes. Yes.
- I'm just worried about you.
- Everyone's been so nice.
- Oh, good.
- She seems icy.
Farrah? She's fine. -She's like gritty.
Cracks me up.
Yeah. Well, the timing's
a little unfortunate.
We should be packing right now.
- Yeah, you going somewhere?
- Canada.
- Hiking up in Nova Scotia.
- You getting help?
Quebec... What? No, we're
paying for it ourselves.
It's so I can propose to her.
What?
We both had it sort
of planned out.
The trip was so I could
ask her to marry me.
You arranged it? Together?
Yeah. Yeah. We talked it over.
To death.
Sounds traumatic.
I'm glad you came.
I didn't know if you were...
- I've been here.
- Yeah, well...
I didn't get an e-mail back, so I just
figured you were on some anger loop
for three months
just screaming at the wall.
No.
This place is cozy.
- Hey, do you guys have any cookies?
- Cookies?
- Farrah, do we have any cookies?
- What?
- Do we have any cookies?
- Did you look?
- Do you know if there are any left?
- Did you look?
For the cookies?
I'm just asking if you
happen to know if we...
Sorry. Sorry.
This is John, we lived together in college.
John, mat. My brother.
- You two bond over Jamiroquai?
- The music's good tonight, right?
It's fine for hand-me-down taste. You
resisted my music for so many years.
Your music.
I didn't even know music was
playing.
So, John, were you
on the squash team?
Were you an improve comedian?
- I was in a group that sang madrigals.
- Goddamn right you were.
Yeah, John was a real pussy
magnet.
You gonna sing something for us?
Come on, sing something for us!
- He wants to.
- Yeah he does.
Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.
No you don't.
Hello? Hello?
Holy shit. Earl, I didn't
know you were coming.
Oh, I love this. I love it.
I'm sorry I missed the show.
- Don't tell Farrah.
- Earl.
Oh, I talked to your mother
yesterday.
Uh, she told me about Sharon... You hear
about your aunt Sharon and her wrists?
Yeah, I did. Did you hear about this?
She tried to kill herself.
- I heard about it.
- You didn't hear about it.
- What, mom doesn't call me about things?
- Ugh, I mean, try paraquat,
Sharon, try a... your aunt has been
crying wolf ever since I was a teenager.
Your dad's side and your mom's side...
you two come from colliding stormfronts.
Hi, mat. -So Earl, you
still pissed at me?
I don't know. Maybe I am. Have
you talked to your dad lately?
Hello, you! I missed your thing.
I'm terrible. Was it amazing?
Yes, it was amazing.
You look so cool.
I'll never be as cool as you.
It's all a charade.
Don't worry about cool.
This is mai.
Hi! She's from Korea. She's
a spectacular filmmaker.
I call her dark and stormy. -Oh,
do you like it when he does that?
No, I don't. -Hey Farrah,
do you have a boys' room?
Yes, of course.
Alan, get mai a drink.
- Uh, yeah, what do you drink?
- No thanks.
- You don't drink? I mean...
- You smoke dope?
Who needs wine?
I dreamt about searching through
my history last night.
The history on my web browser.
That was the whole dream.
You want a good dream tonight?
So this guy over there
he's in this one where
he's like a wild bronco
being tamed...
It was like kinetic, exciting.
I mean, it was amazing.
Then Farrah comes on and they're
all in these gray and black robes.
'A world beyond color
and light.'
I just... I felt like I was watching
some survivalist tract from the future.
- Like post-apocalyptic semaphore.
- I read that.
Is that James Wolcott?
So you can read the Internet.
Yeah, well.
He was right.
When did you read that?
A couple of days ago.
- You read reviews before tonight?
- Yeah, I was curious.
It stuck with me I guess because
he was right, you know.
There was no... It wasn't
exciting.
The technique was... Solid.
You'd know better about
that, but conceptually,
'a world beyond
color and light'...
It just...
It just made me feel hopeless.
Sounds great. I hope there's
a DVD copy.
Well, we don't have a TV, so...
- You don't have a TV?
- No, we don't have a TV.
- So this is bohemia.
- Oh, you know what, you guys,
I have a video of rehearsal
on my phone.
Okay, so it didn't give you that
happy, tingly feeling you paid for.
Come on. Who likes to feel bad? -Okay,
but even happy things just roll off you.
- They do, Alan. They do, they do.
- Okay.
I'm happy you liked Mickey's dance. Even if
you called it exciting, which, by the way,
almost everything you like, you say
you like because it's exciting.
It's just most people pursue art...
they go after it to engage feelings
that they have or don't have...
To clarify emotions and to be
comforted by the fact
that they're not alone in
feeling them.
That's why you pursue art.
I'm gonna eat a bullet if
we keep watching this. -Mat.
It's just,
I could do without...
Without his opinion sometimes.
It could be anything, it could be
like some movie with talking animals
and fart jokes...
And when we see these things, I brace
for it, I brace for your opinion.
It's exhausting. -Well, I will
try to change that about myself.
- Come on, we're just talking.
- How's it going, mai?
I think you would hate
my movies.
- Oh, no, no, no.
- They're not exciting.
Yes they are. -Oh, one
does have talking animals.
- I don't get it.
- Getting out an opinion first
doesn't make it or your more
interesting.
- Do you need a refill?
- It's just defense.
- Do we have any more limes?
- Please don't be mad.
- No, I mean, I forget.
- Alan...
You're still working your stuff
out, your, your opinions.
Some of us who went to college have
already worked this stuff out.
Alan. You're not done working stuff out.
You're nowhere near done.
Yeah, I don't know, maybe...
Can someone settle this?
We can all just drop it and talk
about how right you are...
Because you are so right, I mean you are
like so right, I mean, you are like right.
Listen, just even the way he described
the performance sounds like
it was really great,
I'm so sorry I missed it.
Even he couldn't make it not
sound great.
Earl.
Nice. -Um, how long have
you been dancing for?
- Man, I've been dancing for a while.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, about ten, twelve years.
- And you're gay?
- And I'm gay.
- Cool.
Yeah.
When we were young,
we'd go weeks without showering.
If we stayed dirty enough, we'd
think of it as the essential scent.
True bottom. The smell of your self.
We thought, maybe unwisely,
that smelling like our true selves
would drive the ladies mad.
That our authenticity would lead
to romance... -And handjobs.
Handjobs are romance.
I was living in a studio
near 71st and Columbus
back when you could
get mugged there...
- Sorry, I don't know why this is on there.
- No, keep it, it's good.
It's delicious. So your father visits me...
He's in for a conference...
And he's only in for one night,
so we're going to get dirty,
we're going to layer
on the filth with a trowel...
Until we're dominated,
dominated in black...
Now, so, this is the predictable part...
Yelling at strangers, drugs and women...
- Okay, Earl, just take it easy.
- What?
I don't know most of these people and
you're talking about our father and women.
Your dad fucked other women. He
doesn't anymore. He doesn't now.
- Done. Are you still hurt? Get over it!
- Take it easy. Take it easy!
Your dad is fine, by the way.
He's doing just fine.
So I think we cabbed it down to
Max's, which was in its second phase
then trying to make our way through
that scene for like half an hour.
We felt like a couple of squares, but
we were sure they didn't get it either.
There was a lot more
mingling in the city then.
- Sounds pretty magical.
- It's better now.
I don't know. It's different.
Anyway - you all will never
know! Sorry!
- When was this?
- Uh - oh, ah... probably 78'?
Jesus. Where was I?
You were crapping in a diaper
somewhere.
We met this girl, very earthy and
Jewish, which your dad enjoyed...
Can you just get to the end? This
is like a root canal for me.
- Calm down.
- Don't tell me to calm down!
- Okay, okay! She wanted us both!
- Awh, my God. Oh my God.
No, that was her thing, and,
well... She's who we found.
I'm remembering it all again, we were
in this one room the whole time,
and as I look over to your dad,
who's - he's - he's going on top-
- well, it - it was his turn, so...
- Awh!
So, he raises his arm, and gives this
big, deep sniff of his armpit in and out,
in and out - and he yells at
this girl, "this is me!"
This is me! This is who I am!"
That was the closest your dad
ever got to poetry.
- Oh my God. What did she do?
- Oh, she was into it.
When I look in the mirror,
I change my face immediately.
So I never know what expression I'm making.
It's like a correction.
Now, I have a question. Being that you guys
are French, do you say "9/11" or "11/9?"
Run! Come on, let's go!
No. No, no, no, no, no.
Yes, yeah,
yeah you are the best.
Look at you, seeing us off.
Hey, their mom and me? We love
you, do you hear me? We love you.
Oh. Thanks. -Be good, you two!
Hey Alan. Bye.
- Alright. Bye mai, I enjoyed meeting you.
- Oh, likewise!
Get out of here.
Hey!
- Where's your green dress?
- Which?
- Uh, it hits, like, above your knees?
- The bright green one?
Yeah. I got us a reservation.
At a place.
It has a michelin star.
You did?
- Yeah.
- Already?
Wow. You're funny.
What is this? What happened
to music you can dance to?
Seriously. Change it, please.
Done.
Oh, thank you.
That's nice.
Oh, I like that.
Farrah.
Hey! Dance with us, you lump.
Each with his bonny lass,
hey, Alan! Get up!
The flight's leaving in ninety minutes.
Hey! Wake up!
It's Laguardia?
Fuck, Alan.
Hey, man.
Hey, you have a menthol?
Why do you think
I have a menthol?
I don't think you have a menthol, I
was just hoping you had a menthol.
- You have a cigarette?
- I have a menthol!
- Bacon, egg and cheese on a roll.
- Okay. Turkey bacon is okay?
Turkey bacon. No! Hold on,
never mind. Can I get uh...
Please will you give us...
You want chopped cheese? -Chopped cheese?
What's a chopped cheese?
Chopped cheese
is chopped cheese.
- Alright, I'll get a chopped cheese.
- You like.
You got it. You'll love it,
buddy.
Oh! You guys
have... e-cigarettes?
He-man! Do guys last very long?
No, but you know what, I can
always get them hard again,
and I have fun the second
round.
Hi, Texas man, how are you? I can
come just by having them sucked.
I always wanted
to raise my kids on a farm.
So starting a dairy
was a good way to do that.
So when you say you started a
dairy, what do you mean by that?
We bought fifty cows, learned
how to milk them the night...
Ow! Fuck!
Fuuuck.
Shit!
Hey, man, I'm Alan's brother
from upstairs. -Yeah.
I, you can see I...
Do you have any band-aids?
Alan doesn't have
any fucking band aids.
It's not a trick question, there's
blood all over the stairs.
Do you have any band aids?
It's all grass-fed milk.
And the fat is on top.
And the reason we leave the fat is because
that is where all the benefits are...
The promise of a new day.
You don't have to smoke
those by the window.
That's the point
of those things.
I disagree.
- You hungry?
- Yeah.
They have tuna.
And a fucking nice can opener.
- I don't think I like it here.
- You did last night.
Plus, it's bug-free.
I got up to pee and my mind
went crazy.
I started wondering how Ronnie was
doing at his sleepover with Deshawn...
I was trying really
hard not to text him, but...
What if they come back?
The brother and his girlfriend?
Look, you don't have to stay here if
the energy alignment makes you queasy.
You begged me to come. -I never
beg you to come, sweetie.
Jesus, look, just do
what you want.
He's hurt. How could I abandon
him and his bloody appendage?
I'm gonna take a walk.
Do you want to take a walk?
- What? My foot kills.
- I'm gonna get Ronnie.
I'm gonna surprise him.
I'll see you later.
Where're you going to take him?
Jennifer said that we
can crash at her place.
Maybe we'll do that.
Bring him here.
Bring him here?
This is sixty megahertz? I know about
refresh rates and megahertz...
It's as important as resolution.
I mean, it makes a difference, but
it's not a crucial difference.
The actual amount of time you'll actually
spend watching something at full 1080.
I mean, it's 720. It's great.
So I should just give you my
cash because I'm some deadbeat?
Do you want 240 megahertz? Do you want 600?
They're both a lot more money.
I was thinking about financing. -Oh, right.
Right. Well, you known,
I mean, not everything requires
full resolution.
Do you really need the best TV?
What about just a less shitty one; A
TV that's better than your current TV.
I mean, this TV here, that TV
there, you watch the Mets game,
it's the same Mets,
you know what I mean?
So what is your...
Installment plan?
I'll be honest with you, this isn't a
not good TV and it's almost affordable
as long as your credit's okay, like slightly
okay, you can finance it, you're able man.
Mat! It's a TV.
- It's really heavy.
- You can't pick it up?
- No, I can't.
- Try it.
Oh my God!
The marijuana plant has taken root
in Dugan and Martinez's household
like a weed.
What began as innocent
experimentation
quickly descended
into something far darker.
I began to notice anger
under Martinez's laugh.
Sadness beneath Dugan's smile.
It was clear to me that it was just a
matter of time before their true natures...
- You okay?
- Yeah. You?
- Watching TV?
- It's pretty bad.
I think there's a rat inside it.
There is not.
This bed is so comfy, right?
Yeah.
I didn't like it at first;
It's memory foam.
Memory foam?
- Did you brush your teeth today?
- Yes.
- What?
- You are a liar.
You've gotten so good at that.
Aw, man.
You used to be so obvious.
I didn't brush my teeth.
You lie more as you get older, you know.
And then, at some point,
you'll start lying less because you
realize there's not that much point.
That's when we can tell
each other actual secrets.
When?
When you're honest again.
Fifteen, twenty years.
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay, I'm not mad.
I'm just turning away because
your breath's so horrible.
I should fart on you. Get even.
Red riding had never
seen a wolf before.
She thought he was the most
beautiful brown dog...
Meanwhile, Mr. wolf ran slyly
through the wood, along the path,
and over the hill, until
he reached grandmother's...
Perhaps granny'd been ill,
with no one to look after her.
'Oh, grandmother, how you've changed!
What long ears you have',
said little red riding hood.
Oh, grand...
Your nose! What a long nose you have!
All the...
Grandmother was ever so grateful to
see red riding hood safe and sound.
The brave huntsman was very
proud of his trusty old gun.
Along the path to his home in
the forest...
where she lived happily
ever after.
What is this? Jesus. Where'd you get this?
Put it back.
Sorry. -Why is your bag
out in the hallway?
Mom, I need to show you
something in the closet.
You can when I'm done.
You wanna show mat?
There's something
you should see in the closet.
- What?
- I'd like to offer him dinner.
- We know, you cooked food.
- Did he call you or anything?
He told me he was going
to be away for two weeks.
- Where's the girlfriend?
- I don't know.
Oh, jeez. Let's just not make
a soap opera out of it, okay?
Ice cream!
Hey, the ice cream truck is here. Hey,
can we go, can we go get ice cream?
Let's go. My treat. Unless you've
got cash because otherwise
I have to go to an atm.
- Should we leave?
- And go where?
I don't know. We could
probably stay with Richard.
I mean, we could.
- Richard?
- What?
- Nothing.
- Is he gonna be mad?
- Richard?
- No, Alan.
Oh, Alan? I don't know. I don't
care, I can stay here if I want.
I don't give a shit what Alan
thinks...
Mind if I have some of this?
What is it, chicken? -It is...
it's chicken. I cooked it.
- Hi, I'm Andrea.
- Alan.
The bridge was like, uh, the bridge was
like floating... Or not floating...
It was suspended over the water...
It was a stunning waterfall...
It was really exciting.
Quebec is... the city of quebec
is really beautiful.
It's interesting. It's got
a really exciting...
Architecture to it. Like it's scaled
for the eighteenth century, you know,
for people who are, like,
half a foot shorter than us.
- Like, have you ever been to France?
- Yeah, I have.
- You went to France?
- Yeah.
Oh, well, I always assumed
that Paris felt like that.
What is that, Delaware?
No, I don't have credit cards
anymore.
So how bad can it be?
Just answer the fucking phone
or turn it off.
- Excuse me.
- He's heard worse.
Hi, this is mat, I'd love
to talk to you right now.
Hello?
I told you I would get
you a sample as soon as...
- Are you okay?
- Uh, no.
I don't want to talk about it.
We're gonna leave.
We would be home now.
Obviously, but our building
has bed bugs.
- They are spraying for it.
- You have bed bugs?
You brought your stuff here?
No, no, we don't, the building.
And my super swears that it's
not bed bugs, but radon.
Wow, those are two really
different things.
I told mat that I would
call Ronnie's dad.
He is a nightmare, but we can
totally stay with him. I will call.
Yeah, um, do whatever... I mean,
stay tonight, if you want,
my house is, you know... stay.
Ice cream! Come on, let's go, I
want to get some goddamn ice cream!
My vanilla ice mama.
Where goes the boy?
- Hey, Ronnie. Wait up!
- Where is the ice cream truck?
It's everywhere.
I'm sorry.
- How are you doing?
- I'm fine.
Hi, this is Farrah.
Please leave a message.
So yeah, I just felt like
coming in.
My brother's staying
with me... us,
and it's just,
it's a little, you know,
he's kind of,
he's kind of a lot.
It's kind of nice
to come see you guys, check in.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Hey, Fede, what's up, man?
You look good.
We're talking.
- Yeah, great.
- So did you bring the notices?
I have the notices.
I haven't opened them.
- Why not?
- I'm not opening mail right now.
- Wait, what's the deal?
- We're good here.
No, what happened? -They're evicting
him at the end of the month.
What? Are the girls
with their mother?
Two boys, two boys...
- They're with you?
- Yes.
- How many months are you behind?
- Three.
It's nothing.
I was doing a remodeling gig
with my sister's boyfriend.
- We talked about this already.
- Yeah, I know,
- I wasn't here.
- That's true, you weren't.
I know they know how much
I'm messing up.
I keep thinking about in twenty
years, they'll be saying,
"and then we got kicked out
of our apartment..."
"Cause our dad didn't check
the mail..."
"And that's when things got bad.
I didn't have a home,
and I started sucking cocks
on twelfth Avenue."
I keep thinking about my son sucking
cocks for money on twelfth Avenue.
Well...
You know, in this economy,
any job is a blessing.
Don't make a joke, man. -You
ever do video chats? Like, Skype.
- Yeah, all the time.
- I skyped with my dad last week.
Nice.
Yeah, he's kind of a prick, um,
that's just the way he is.
My brother can't stand him, which I think
is partly why I could never stand him.
I usually just talk to him on
the phone, but my mom was like,
no, no,
it's got to be a video chat...
Alan, we don't need
to talk about this right now.
I think she just wanted me to look at him
shaking, you know... his head, shaking.
I don't even remember what we... Oh yeah we
talked about this e-mail that he printed out,
and I was like, "dad, you don't
have to print out the e-mail",
you can just read it
off the screen."
I don't know. It made me pretty sad.
Maybe it was what my mom wanted...
She wanted me to look at him.
- Your dad was shaking?
- Yeah, he's got Parkinson's...
I said that, did I not say that?
Yeah, I bummed around.
You bummed around brasilia?
Is it a good place?
What is a "good" place?
You know?
Hey, Ronnie, how are ya, kid?
Oh, so, did Ronnie tell you
that he called me from a bodega?
He used his sandwich money.
You called him from a bodega,
Ronnie, you have a phone.
I didn't want you to know
I called, okay?
Hi, this is Farrah,
please leave a message.
Hey, it's me. I'm home...
It's, like, Thursday...
Afternoon. Um, mat's here.
Admit it, be honest,
you're embarrassed.
Your voice... someone should bottle
it up and throw it at terrorists.
- This is inappropriate. It is wrong.
- What's wrong?
I hope you're... You know...
I love you. Call me.
Good for you, you're saving him. Ronnie,
you are so damaged. How does that feel?
Alan, this is Richard, sorry. -Nice
to meet you. Sorry to impose.
It's fine. You're from Rahway,
right?
I'm from Mahwah.
So, you're the brother?
The brother, yeah.
You told me he was from Rahway.
- I said Ronkonkoma.
- Ronkonkoma's long island.
So you're from Mahwah,
but not Rahway or Ronkonkoma.
- You got it.
- Ever been to ho-ho-kus?
- Ho-ho-kus?
- Yeah.
Yeah, you guys are funny.
You ever live there?
Uh, no, but believe it or not,
my mother is from ho-ho-kus.
- It's true.
- Get out of town! She is?
She still live there? -Uh, no,
she's not with us anymore.
She's not!
I'm sorry, it's just...
Look, we'll be out of here
in a second.
- My charger's not charging.
- The power's out.
- What does that mean?
- What does that usually mean?
How are we going
to open cans now?
Look, if you wanna come,
you can come, too, okay.
Katie's fine with it;
I asked. Andrea, you did call me, I
am not leaving here without him.
Give me a break. -When you
are done with this, okay,
call me and we'll work it out.
- Richard! Get out of here, man!
- Guys!
You know, I'm really glad that we could
talk about this here in front of everyone.
He is fine. Ronnie, you're fine,
right?
- You like mat, he's your buddy.
- Ronnie hates me.
- What?
- No I don't.
He wants to leave. Let the
little fucker switch teams.
Can you sit up, please?
If you are uncomfortable, you
come and talk to me about it,
you do not go and call your dad
behind my back.
If you don't tell me you're uncomfortable,
I can't make you feel better.
- So you're an accountant?
- Uh, no, I'm a cpa, why?
Did she say that
I was an accountant?
- I'm a vp.
- Whoa, of what?
Metal sheds, barns, farm buildings, prefab.
We call them "ultra-durable."
I'd buy one.
Did you grow up on a farm?
No. I've been thinking
about incorporating.
- What do you think about that?
- What do you do?
Freelance web design.
- Are you asking me if that's what you do?
- No, that's what I do.
- All there right on that laptop?
- Yeah.
Well, how was your year?
Business? -Shut up.
- Yeah, don't incorporate.
- No?
No, it's fees, headaches. You know,
the money that you save on taxes
isn't worth it if your revenue is, um...
Abbreviated.
Time to get out, Richard!
- So do you, do you, um, have a card?
- Yeah.
Thanks. I got it.
Of course you can.
Why are you asking?
Bye, guys!
Guys, Ronnie's saying bye.
- Take it easy.
- Bye.
Gimme that! Give me the phone!
- It's Farrah. Hello.
- Hello.
- Hold on.
- Farrah!
I don't know.
Hello?
Farrah!
Hey... hey, I...
Enjoy your time with dad?
I am not mad. Stay with him
as long as you want.
- I'm going to go.
- What?
This is imposing.
It's really offensive and tacky.
No, it's fine.
You can stay another night.
I'll get some beer. -Yeah,
let's get some fucking beer.
No, you stay here.
I have to go to the restroom.
Okay. Wash your hands
after. Don't talk to strangers.
And don't call your dad
from a bodega.
Stop, man.
Do you remember that, um,
hurricane myra?
Was that a hurricane...
Myra... Meera?
When we turned all the radios up
after the power went out
so it would be all loud and freak
people out when it came back on?
Do you remember that?
Where'd you go to buy beer, Albany?
Little beer run to Albany?
- Stop!
- Where's the fucking beer?
Where is my beer?
Hey, Andrea?
- Andrea? Andrea, come here.
- Farrah,
please... just call me.
Your brother's taking
a little evening nap.
He's got the biorhythms
of a lion.
He has an enormous dick.
- Oh, I'm drunker than I thought.
- No, no,
I've heard it all before. In high
school they called him "rubber Buster."
Yeah. What side
does that come from?
What an interesting question.
Our dad has a medium,
medium-large penis, I think.
Our mother's dick
is very average.
And, um...
Mine, oh it's exactly the same
length as mat's to the millimeter,
but, uh, it's corkscrewed
and very thin, beet red,
and it wriggles uncontrollably and
when I get aroused, it turns black.
Gross.
- Is this okay?
- Sure.
Ronnie stares at you. -You said
that last night. I know. I get it.
He stares at you a lot.
I love being up early.
More than two hours of sunlight.
Take it easy.
Oh, crabby, I don't like to get
out of bed in the morning.
I want to stay in bed with
my blankies.
- Fuck off.
- -Fuck yourself!
- You fuck yourself.
- Fuck you, motherfucker!
- No, fuck you!
- Fuck you in the eyes and...
What do you guys wanna
do today?
This is it. This is what
I'm doing today.
- Jesus.
- -What?
- No, what?
- -You're like a fucking funnel.
Like a fucking funeral pile.
Funeral pyre?
Is that what you're trying to say?
Fucking cumulonimbus
with fucking legs.
- You got a hairball.
- Yeah, I gotta push it down.
I gotta push it down... I got a hairball
in my throat, and I gotta push it down.
I got to take a piss.
You guys cover me?
She left me.
- She left me.
- We know.
Don't discuss me with him. -We don't
talk about you, just, come on, we know...
- I didn't ask her to marry me.
- Oh.
She started shaking.
I was just holding her hand.
So I let go of her
hand and I walked away.
You were just scared.
It was like vomit.
She told me that I was lost.
That my eyes
don't give enough to her.
That she doesn't know why
I'm so sad and angry.
And that it's hurtful to be around.
Me. That she's dried up.
Well, yes, yeah, I am sad!
I'm very sad! I'm very
fucking sad and angry!
Why are you angry?
You don't seem so angry...
I am. I'm enraged!
I don't know how else to be...
That's silly! You're lucky that
you have someone who knows you
- and wants to help you.
- Are you fucking kidding me?
What did you say? -I grabbed her by
the shoulder and screamed at her.
I called her terrible things.
I just wanted her to say yes!
Just yes, I will, I
will marry you!
So we gonna bomb this bridge
or what?
No!
I'll never see Ronnie again.
This is insane! Get me out of here!
Get me out of here!
- Jesus! Save me!
- Shut the fuck up!
Save me!
Yeah, it's me. Still here.
Do you love me?
Ok.
I love you.
I don't know...
Twenty-four hours.
- We have food spoiling, so...
- Just tell me. Do you love me?
I don't know.
- Should he just call me back?
- Go away.
Yes, yeah, sure, I'll wait.
- You can be honest with me.
- Oh, thank you.
You definitely need me. Right? You have
told me that you love me so many times...
You told me our first week
together, that you loved me.
You told me when you were crying... crying
in the middle of the fucking night...
Jesus Christ! Who needs this?! Who
needs this in their fucking life?!
Yeah, who needs this?
Who needs this?
You wanna go? You wanna leave
my brother's apartment?
I can do what I want,
you piece of shit!
Do you even have some
place to go at this point?
- God, has he always been like this?
- I don't, I'm not...
Have I always been like this,
huh?
Yes! For as long
as I've known you.
For as long as I've known you,
and how long has that been, huh?
I don't understand what that
even means.
Okay, okay, come on, come on,
it's nap time. Come on.
It's time to take a nap. -No. You're
not just going to lead me away.
I'm all fucked out today. -I don't
think you can help acting like this.
Look at your face. You want to get me off
with that fucking face, well fuck you.
Fuck you!
If you want to get me off
then stop.
Stop sweating and running and then
maybe I could fucking get off,
maybe I'll come like a fucking
spindletop.
- Mat! What are you doing?!
- Right now!
It never stops.
It just never fucking stops.
It never fucking stops.
It never fucking stops.
Don't you dare.
I'm sorry. I'm just showing
everybody everything today.
Call me if you need to.
Hey, whoa, whoa whoa.
Just fucking leave it, man.
- I have to charge my phone.
- Just please fucking calm down.
Hey. Hey, you're in my bed.
Just kidding. I got food.
I got food from the arabs.
- What's that?
- Chopped cheese. It's good.
So. I went up to that bar
on 14th and Amsterdam.
I think that place is a front
for something, don't you?
- What do you want to do tonight?
- I don't know.
What do you think of my lighting set-up?
Did you use all our candles?
This is not good.
Mat, hi! This is your mom.
When you can, please call me.
Earl is apparently in some kind of bind
in his place in... Chinatown, I think?
I think it's some sort
of physical trouble.
Needs a big strong man's help.
I don't know if you're avoiding
us, or what.
We don't have much right now, but if
you need, like, a hundred dollars,
we can probably scrape that up.
Okay, love to hear from you.
Bye, mat.
- Going somewhere?
- Downtown.
- Mom call you?
- Mmm, no.
Okay.
Hi. Did I call you?
I've had some painkillers.
That's okay.
- Anyone else coming?
- Uh, no, it's just me.
- Did you need something?
- You two doing alright?
Oh, we're fine. He couldn't
make it. He's sorry.
- I think Farrah is great, you know.
- Oh, uh, yeah.
I think she knows
how to handle you.
- Tricky business.
- Yeah. So...
My fucking fingers don't work
so I've had a little surgery.
Oh, Jesus, Earl.
- Does that hurt?
- Some things hurt, yeah.
You want something?
I have pills, a few left.
- Uh, maybe I'll have a drink?
- Oh, yeah, try that stuff.
Did you need me to, uh,
lift something? -Yes.
Oh, shit.
Fuck, Earl.
It's your dog. Manzanera.
Manzanera, I know.
I've absorbed it.
I'll need a new one.
I'm sorry I had a little
Susan-left-xanadu moment.
It's very heavy, Earl.
It's okay, forget about it.
See those little clementines on the table?
You see where this is going.
Oh, that's nice. Thanks.
Hello.
Hi.
- Alan?
- Yeah?
Hi. Beatrice? Oh, you wouldn't
remember me.
Maybe you would. I was
at Lindsay's wedding.
Oh my God. You might
not remember that either.
I was sort of a kid, too.
Not really.
This is definitely
the quietest I've seen him.
- He's not "the Earl".
- Won't be gone for long.
- I hope so.
- I have to go to the bathroom.
- Okay, which?
- Just a tinkle.
I can help. -No, it's okay.
I've done this before.
You know those water pouches they
carry through the desert in westerns
made out
of a buffalo's intestine?
Middle of the desert,
some Indian shoots a hole
in the pouch with his rifle
and it just leaks...
And leaks and leaks,
and leaks and leaks...
- Hey, where are you?
- The feast of San Gennaro.
- Where are you? Are you alive?
- The feast of San Gennaro!
Jesus, that's awful.
Did you see Earl?
- Yeah, I saw Earl.
- Is he still breathing?
Yeah, tell mom he's home,
I guess.
Michael's here. He's got some,
little... girl with him.
Michael's there?-Yeah,
he will not stop talking.
- Get over here. I'm dying over here.
-I guess I can come.
- They're boring the fuck out of me.
-Alright.
- Hey, guys. What's up?
- Oh, God, are you okay?
- Oh, yeah, it's fine, I'm fine.
- Fine? You don't look fine.
- It's really good to see you...
- You look like shit!
- Yeah, you look like shit.
- I'm fine, really...
He's fine. He's totally fine.
He says he's fine, he's fine.
I'm Alan.
She's sort of my... thing.
It's a cash only bar
and I've got a credit card.
It's about the fluidity
of movement...
Oh, Michael was telling me
a story about Farrah.
She sounds so cool. She's
a dancer. That's exciting.
She's an office manager
at a dance company.
Even if you ignore the storytelling,
which is pretty primitive.
- What do you do?
- I'm a painter.
- So do you do like abstract stuff?
- I'm trying to.
To be honest, I'm kind of
in a crisis right now.
I want to get
past representation, but...
I'm sorry, I thought you
were, like, in a crisis.
I'm sure you'll get past it.
Uh, did you know your
brother poured a beer on me?
- What?
- You poured a beer on me.
I hope you see someone about your issues.
Do you see someone?
Don't do this. -You are
cruisin' for a bruisin'.
What is this, some fantasy?
Doing coke off a hood?
Why are you doing that?
You're snorting bugs and dirt.
- He's a little drunk.
- I am a little drunk.
But I'll tell you what. If you
stare at any asshole long enough,
you're going to want to stick
your tongue in it.
You got a hairball. -I got a hairball
and I need someone to shove it down!
Get some of that.
Babe!
Fuck!
It's the wrong fucking stop!
This is perfect.
This is, like, it's like magic.
This is exquisite.
Don't describe what you're
doing while you're doing it.
You're, like, killing it
with words.
Hey, guys? Guys?
Yeah, if you could hold for just a minute?
We're shooting something.
- It'll just be a minute.
- What are you shooting?
- It's a movie.
- Cool.
- Dave for Jo.
- Go for Jonah.
- Lock it up. We're gonna roll.
- Copy that. Lookin' it up.
I got a couple of guys here
but we're holding. They're cool.
- That's cool, man. Thanks a lot.
- Yeah.
Oh, hey, actually if you could do me a favor
and just hold off on lighting that up.
What? There's fake fucking
fog everywhere.
Yeah, but, it's just,
I'm allergic to cigarette smoke.
He's allergic! -It makes me cough.
You'll hear me cough.
It's actually illegal to smoke
cigarettes in New York City parks.
Where the fuck are they?
I don't see anyone.
They're there. It's just we don't
want anyone walking through.
- There?!
- It's an important scene.
Oh, shit, I see, mat... Oh, dude,
look, they're right there!
The thing is you need to be really quiet
because it's a really important scene.
Yeah, it's an important scene. You wanna
direct, don't you? You got vision!
It's the real deal, guys.
Yeah, we're really killing
ourselves for these guys.
They're really
making it happen.
I'm just ready to get
some sleep, you know?
You're ready for some sleep?
What? -You just said you're
ready for some sleep.
What are you, four-years-old? You want
me to warm you up a bottle of milk?
You want your "binky"?
All clear.-Hey, you guys are good.
Thank you.
You've been patient.
Have a good night.
Thanks, man! You have
a good night, too.
Lock it up! We're gonna roll.
Goddammit.
Okay, Roger, copy that!
Let's take this hill, boys.
Grab your cocks!
Dave to Jonah. You there?
What was that?
"Hey guys, this is Jonah.
Some guys took my walkie.
You gotta stop them! Guys!"
What the fuck?
Scotch!
Scoooootch!
Good luck finding it.
Oh, shit! That goddamn mouse!
That goddamn mouse!
Oh, shit, I got it!
- What?
- I got it in my hands!
It's in my hands! Open the window!
Open the window!
Open the window!
- What're you going to do?
- What do you mean?
- What're you going to do?
- What, you want to keep it?
No!
Hey, scotch!
Scotch!
Whiskey.
Hello?
Whoever took this,
you want to return it, please?
- Is anyone there?
- There's nobody here.
- Hello? Hey.
- There's nobody on this walkie.
- I know someone's there.
- But hey,
if you see that punk kid pa, who told
me I couldn't smoke a cigarette,
tell him to pop his zits
and go suck a dick.
You're getting this pa
into a lot of trouble.
He's very hurt.
Will she come back?
I hadn't even thought about it.
I miss her.
I don't want to start over.
I want to work on it.
I love her, you know?
I truly do.
Hey, hey, put some music on. Come on,
play some music from your phone.
Let's stay up till
the sun rises. Come on!
Let's stay up till
the sun... come on.
Till the sun comes up!
Alan, come on!
Good morning.
You've got vomit...
Oh! Jesus.
It's jammed! It's jammed shut!
Would you turn the music off?
What, do you think Ronnie
did that? Did you do that?
No I didn't do it.
This is her goddamn natural
peanut butter.
- She never picks up a fucking sponge.
- Calm down.
Don't tell me to calm down.
Here. Eat a fucking banana.
Oh, charging, yeah.
Come on, baby. Charging.
Can you hand me that pen?
Hello?
What?
Oh.
You should have a blog, man.
Or something. You are funny.
From time to time.
I do, grandpa.
Here, take a look.
- Where do you get these pictures?
- Just online.
"All you need to make a movie
is a gun and a head."
You can scroll down.
- Who was that calling? Andrea?
- Or not.
"Building collapsed in Mumbai;
Scores missing".
I'm going to take a shower.
I stink.
Fucking peanut butter.
Fucking peanut butter.
You know, if you wash some of
the dishes, the pile goes down.
I'll look at the door if you want. How
did it lock from the inside anyway?
It's kind of unsafe.
Alright, what was that?
A faberge egg, what do you think it was?
It was a glass. Jesus, I'll pay for it.
It's more important to me
that you stop breaking things.
I'm ready to be a better man
for you.
I'm ready to be a better man
for you.
I'm getting sick.
I've got phlegm.
- Something funny over there?
- Just...
You, being useful. It's, like,
a parody of usefulness.
It's alright man. I'll do 'em.
Be my guest.
Why don't you just keep it? -It's finky,
even if you listen to it ironically.
I didn't choose it ironically. -Oh, come
on, you listen to everything ironically.
What did I see in there?
Is that Dennis Wilson?
- You gave me that!
- Oh, I doubt that.
Yes, you did. You said, "some
of this stuff is overwrought",
"but he drowned in a puddle,
blah blah," which he didn't,
by the way, he drowned
in a marina.
No, he drowned in a puddle,
and who cares? He was miserable.
No, it was a Marina. Did you know Longfellow's
wife died when her dress caught fire?
It was a marina, he was diving. She was sealing
her children's hair in an envelope with hot wax
when her dress caught fire and he tried
to wrap her up in a rug, but she died.
Honestly... Oh, fuck! Ah! Shit!
What is this?
Why is this shit...
Fuck, I thought I got
everything out.
Why are you such a useless
fuck-up?
Like, the only time you go out of
your way is to fuck something up.
- That's where your effort goes.
- What are you searching for?
- Band-aids!
- I got band-aids.
What the fuck are you waiting for?
Get the goddamn band-aids! Ah!
Ah, fuck. The band-aids
are in the bathroom.
Fuck!
Goddammit!
It's busted. You busted it. You're
like a fucking kodiak bear.
Fuck! What?
Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Calm down! Hey. Calm down.
You calm down.
Fuck you.
You got a hairball, bro!
You don't even want me to articulate.
You're lucky I can't fucking string
a sentence together to tell you about
yourself, your fucking zero, nothing self!
Yeah? Yeah? You tell me you
want to be a better man?
Is that true? Is that true?
Well then whisper it
in my fucking ear, you fuck!
Get on your knees
and propose it to me!
I love how you act like I'm not
the only person,
the only person, who'll put up
with your shit!
Like I don't have the power to pull the fucking
plug out of your drain! You'd have no one!
Yeah, that was articulate! Like,
three-quarters articulate!
You're a marginal figure! -Where
are you going, you leaving?
You running away?
I'm calling a nuthouse, asshole,
for guess who! You!
Ah! Haha! Hah, good one!
Ah, fuck!
When I recognize you in myself, when
I recognize parts of you in myself,
I get sick. You're rotten, hopeless,
hypnagogic, you're just...
You have a black
heart. You're half-awake.
- What if I turned into you?
- And content to be...
Half-awake. What if I turned into you?
I see dad.
I see him in you, and I see him in me, and
everything you hate about him, you have!
I don't want to reject you,
I don't want to cut you out,
but all you do
is disappoint me, every time.
It breaks my...
Here. Read it.
What is this, something
you wrote for Farrah?
- You spelled 'cum' with a 'u'.
- It says what I think of you.
'Hypna-goggic'? 'Hypna-gaga'... I don't
even know what that fucking means.
Mat!
Mat, look at me!
Mat.
Mat. Mat!
He and I shared a fire.
He made the fire.
His English was terrible.
Or French, all that crooked
Canadian French.
And the ceilings were so tall,
it - it - it made it look like
our reflections were spinning.
Turning, like leaves
turning in the wind? And...
I remembered you, crying.
Huh. Look.
You okay?
You're stuffed up.
We might have some nasal stuff.
I already looked.
I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go get some.
- Taking your laptop?
- I don't know. Yeah.
You hot in your coat?
No. I'm fine.
- You hungry?
- Yeah, sure.
Make me a fucking sandwich.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- How's it...
- What?
What's going on... Am I
missing something? What?
Let me take a shower.
Five minutes.
You think about me
getting all wet and soapy.
I'll shower with you.
Ronnie's here.
- Who cares?
- Hey.
I need your help sometimes, and
you need mine. Just ask me...
You want me to tell you
to shut your mouth?
I'll tell you to shut
your mouth.
Get out! Get the fuck
out of here! Go!
Who the fuck do you
think you are?! Go!
Get your shit, and
get out of here! Go!
Go blow your head off... And do it from the
back so that your fucking face disappears...
Get out of here! Go!
Go! Get out! Go!
Go!
Hey... You can't sleep here.
Do you have an outlet?
Whoa, whoa! What the fuck
are you doing, man?
You can't do that.
It's not that serious.
It's completely disconcerting.
You're being ridiculous,
this is, this is ridiculous.
- You're a liar!
- I just wanted to take a shower.
It was an hour before people got
here and we had to leave time
for you to put your socks on
for twenty-five minutes.
No, don't, don't change the conversation.
We're talking about one thing.
Well, what the fuck, I had a lot of
stuff rattling around in my head.
I'm sorry I didn't make
the right expression
when you tried to shoot
cum all over my face.
The right expression?
You swatted my dick away,
like it was a hornet's nest.
Well, don't try to come on my face like
it's something I've suddenly signed off on.
I didn't try to come on your... I pointed... I
pointed it down at your breasts... You said,
"come on my tits",
so I pointed it at your...
You know how I get... When I'm about to
come I would like to look into your eyes
and see that you're feeling
something, you know...
That you're in the moment, just...
Ten minutes of performance.
Lie to me, convince me that you might
possibly be, you know, excited about my dick.
Well, I wasn't in the
moment because you were...
You're not listening.
I have to do a lot of things. You know,
I'm, I'm running around with a list,
I'm vacuuming and buying
fucking limes,
and you're puttering around staring
into shadows like Abraham Lincoln.
What are you doing? Alan!
Alan, you want to look me in the
eyes and shoot cum in them? Look...
When we land tomorrow...
And we get in that nice hotel
you got a great deal on,
I'll draw a hot bath, and... We'll
put on your trip playlist, and...
Light some candles, and you can blow all the
cum you want all over my body, and I'll laugh,
like a fucking lunatic, okay?
You're choosing not to understand.
You could understand.
Give me a break. I'm sorry, babe,
but this is really stupid, okay?
Hey... oh my God.
You're so, you're... Cool.
We wanted to say hi before
we have to get her home.
Oh, you're leaving now? You just got
here, we didn't really get to...
She's tired.
Shit. Cool.
Two blocks down
and two blocks up.
Two blocks that way?
- Yes, sir.
- And then to the left?
Yes.
"He should just grab
me and show me."
"Raise your head, lift
your arm, turn this way."
Yeah, but that's so literal.
Thank you so much for coming,
and bringing the little one.
- Let me just open this for you.
- Oh, sure.
- Alright, bye! See you! See you.
- Bye.
You missed the baby.
I'm heartbroken.
Here, you just gotta...
- Where'd you learn that?
- Law school.
The horn guys were just sort of
staring at the ground, you know,
and then he came up, and
he just rambled on about...
You know, how we have
to be political,
like freedom to do this and that.
It was kind of wild.
- Why, why don't you sit down?
- I'm good, I'm fine.
Well, anyway, so he got up there, and
he drew this out for an eternity
about how we're all one people.
And then some guy just got up
and yelled at him to play
another song...
But, by that time,
the contract had been broken.
The fun was completely over.
- Oh! Shit!
- I'm sorry!
Why did you do that?
You're always spilling things.
- Everything alright?
- Shit. They found me.
Everyone's so fascinated
by that helicopter. -Yeah.
Helicopter.
What about those girls over there?
Are they fussy?
Like fussy ballerinas?
They're women, not girls. -I just wanna
jam my fingers in that bun on her head.
It looks kind of like a
duckpin bowling ball.
You know, the naked yearning coming out of
you is getting a little tough to stomach.
The walls aren't your goddamn journal.
And you can't stick your fingers
- in a duck pin bowling ball.
- Excuse me.
That's asinine.
And now Farrah left.
- Mat's here?
- What?
Mat's on the couch.
Farrah!
Oh! Hi! You guys, you guys, I've
been seeing you from afar...
Hey, nice dress. -Thanks!
A friend made it for me.
Help yourself to drinks!
I think you were wearing that
same shirt
- the last time we saw you.
- I don't know.
It's been three months.
You should change.
Are those fish on your dress?
- You have fish on your dress.
- Sardines.
- They're sardines.
- Sardines... interesting.
Hey, who is that girl
over there, the one with the...
- Like the, uh, cantaloupe on her head?
- Will you hand me those pillows?
I want to make sure
everyone's comfortable.
Do you have scotch?
- Her name is Elinor...
- Elinor.
And she hates her body.
You should be fine.
- Are you behaving?
- I think so! Really?
Excuse me, can you pass me my bag?
That's my bag.
Oh! Sorry.
This is good, I was just
going to say hi. -Hey.
You're back from Chicago?
Are you in New York now?
Huh? -I'm sorry, I'm David.
We've met before.
- I'm an old friend of Alan's.
- Oh yeah. Hey. Hi.
- How's the website?
- Uh, which one?
You forgot. It's okay.
You were going to do this site for me for this
animation class I teach at Columbia prep.
Because I thought it would be fun. We
were e-mailing back and forth about it.
Yeah. -And you went to...
you were in Chicago, right?
- And you didn't have access to something.
- Yeah, yeah. Sure.
- Sure.
- Yeah. It's fine.
I did put, like, down for it...
It was actually my own money.
- I don't mean to corner you...
- You know, it's not even...
- It's a down payment.
- Yeah.
Yeah, let me send you something.
I don't know if we need it anymore
because I'd kind of given up...
- Hey, hello?
- Okay.
Yeah, how're you doing?
No, not really.
Deep inside, I believe that
this world we live in
is really a big, huge,
monumental,
symphonic orchestra.
What is this music?
Oh goddammit.
And in its primordial form,
all of creation is sound.
It's not just random sound.
It's music.
Who said that? Michael Jackson.
- Is that what you're saying?
- I'm not saying that at all.
Hey! Don't bother people, okay?
I'm not bothering him. I thought
he might have a menthol,
he thought I might have
some cocaine.
Fucking mouse! Goddamn it.
Are you serious? -Mouse? I
thought this dump was clean.
Oh, cause really you know
what clean is, mat.
Let's go in the living room. -Can
I have that cigarette? Thank you.
He's lucky we keep the guns
in our country home.
- I hate mice.
- Yeah, me too.
You mind if I?
Strange air in here.
Yeah, it's a dance company
and some people from work.
Kind of a funny mix. Yeah, I can
definitely tell who your friends are.
- Yeah.
- Hey.
- You guys were fascinating tonight.
- Fascinating?
They ended their season tonight.
This guy Mickey was in this duet
where he was like a wild bronco
being tamed, it was...
- That sounds like torture.
- Yeah.
It's not for everyone. -Yeah,
cause I'm a fucking philistine.
- Are you having fun?
- I'm having so much fun.
- Are you sure?
- Yes. Yes.
- I'm just worried about you.
- Everyone's been so nice.
- Oh, good.
- She seems icy.
Farrah? She's fine. -She's like gritty.
Cracks me up.
Yeah. Well, the timing's
a little unfortunate.
We should be packing right now.
- Yeah, you going somewhere?
- Canada.
- Hiking up in Nova Scotia.
- You getting help?
Quebec... What? No, we're
paying for it ourselves.
It's so I can propose to her.
What?
We both had it sort
of planned out.
The trip was so I could
ask her to marry me.
You arranged it? Together?
Yeah. Yeah. We talked it over.
To death.
Sounds traumatic.
I'm glad you came.
I didn't know if you were...
- I've been here.
- Yeah, well...
I didn't get an e-mail back, so I just
figured you were on some anger loop
for three months
just screaming at the wall.
No.
This place is cozy.
- Hey, do you guys have any cookies?
- Cookies?
- Farrah, do we have any cookies?
- What?
- Do we have any cookies?
- Did you look?
- Do you know if there are any left?
- Did you look?
For the cookies?
I'm just asking if you
happen to know if we...
Sorry. Sorry.
This is John, we lived together in college.
John, mat. My brother.
- You two bond over Jamiroquai?
- The music's good tonight, right?
It's fine for hand-me-down taste. You
resisted my music for so many years.
Your music.
I didn't even know music was
playing.
So, John, were you
on the squash team?
Were you an improve comedian?
- I was in a group that sang madrigals.
- Goddamn right you were.
Yeah, John was a real pussy
magnet.
You gonna sing something for us?
Come on, sing something for us!
- He wants to.
- Yeah he does.
Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.
No you don't.
Hello? Hello?
Holy shit. Earl, I didn't
know you were coming.
Oh, I love this. I love it.
I'm sorry I missed the show.
- Don't tell Farrah.
- Earl.
Oh, I talked to your mother
yesterday.
Uh, she told me about Sharon... You hear
about your aunt Sharon and her wrists?
Yeah, I did. Did you hear about this?
She tried to kill herself.
- I heard about it.
- You didn't hear about it.
- What, mom doesn't call me about things?
- Ugh, I mean, try paraquat,
Sharon, try a... your aunt has been
crying wolf ever since I was a teenager.
Your dad's side and your mom's side...
you two come from colliding stormfronts.
Hi, mat. -So Earl, you
still pissed at me?
I don't know. Maybe I am. Have
you talked to your dad lately?
Hello, you! I missed your thing.
I'm terrible. Was it amazing?
Yes, it was amazing.
You look so cool.
I'll never be as cool as you.
It's all a charade.
Don't worry about cool.
This is mai.
Hi! She's from Korea. She's
a spectacular filmmaker.
I call her dark and stormy. -Oh,
do you like it when he does that?
No, I don't. -Hey Farrah,
do you have a boys' room?
Yes, of course.
Alan, get mai a drink.
- Uh, yeah, what do you drink?
- No thanks.
- You don't drink? I mean...
- You smoke dope?
Who needs wine?
I dreamt about searching through
my history last night.
The history on my web browser.
That was the whole dream.
You want a good dream tonight?
So this guy over there
he's in this one where
he's like a wild bronco
being tamed...
It was like kinetic, exciting.
I mean, it was amazing.
Then Farrah comes on and they're
all in these gray and black robes.
'A world beyond color
and light.'
I just... I felt like I was watching
some survivalist tract from the future.
- Like post-apocalyptic semaphore.
- I read that.
Is that James Wolcott?
So you can read the Internet.
Yeah, well.
He was right.
When did you read that?
A couple of days ago.
- You read reviews before tonight?
- Yeah, I was curious.
It stuck with me I guess because
he was right, you know.
There was no... It wasn't
exciting.
The technique was... Solid.
You'd know better about
that, but conceptually,
'a world beyond
color and light'...
It just...
It just made me feel hopeless.
Sounds great. I hope there's
a DVD copy.
Well, we don't have a TV, so...
- You don't have a TV?
- No, we don't have a TV.
- So this is bohemia.
- Oh, you know what, you guys,
I have a video of rehearsal
on my phone.
Okay, so it didn't give you that
happy, tingly feeling you paid for.
Come on. Who likes to feel bad? -Okay,
but even happy things just roll off you.
- They do, Alan. They do, they do.
- Okay.
I'm happy you liked Mickey's dance. Even if
you called it exciting, which, by the way,
almost everything you like, you say
you like because it's exciting.
It's just most people pursue art...
they go after it to engage feelings
that they have or don't have...
To clarify emotions and to be
comforted by the fact
that they're not alone in
feeling them.
That's why you pursue art.
I'm gonna eat a bullet if
we keep watching this. -Mat.
It's just,
I could do without...
Without his opinion sometimes.
It could be anything, it could be
like some movie with talking animals
and fart jokes...
And when we see these things, I brace
for it, I brace for your opinion.
It's exhausting. -Well, I will
try to change that about myself.
- Come on, we're just talking.
- How's it going, mai?
I think you would hate
my movies.
- Oh, no, no, no.
- They're not exciting.
Yes they are. -Oh, one
does have talking animals.
- I don't get it.
- Getting out an opinion first
doesn't make it or your more
interesting.
- Do you need a refill?
- It's just defense.
- Do we have any more limes?
- Please don't be mad.
- No, I mean, I forget.
- Alan...
You're still working your stuff
out, your, your opinions.
Some of us who went to college have
already worked this stuff out.
Alan. You're not done working stuff out.
You're nowhere near done.
Yeah, I don't know, maybe...
Can someone settle this?
We can all just drop it and talk
about how right you are...
Because you are so right, I mean you are
like so right, I mean, you are like right.
Listen, just even the way he described
the performance sounds like
it was really great,
I'm so sorry I missed it.
Even he couldn't make it not
sound great.
Earl.
Nice. -Um, how long have
you been dancing for?
- Man, I've been dancing for a while.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, about ten, twelve years.
- And you're gay?
- And I'm gay.
- Cool.
Yeah.
When we were young,
we'd go weeks without showering.
If we stayed dirty enough, we'd
think of it as the essential scent.
True bottom. The smell of your self.
We thought, maybe unwisely,
that smelling like our true selves
would drive the ladies mad.
That our authenticity would lead
to romance... -And handjobs.
Handjobs are romance.
I was living in a studio
near 71st and Columbus
back when you could
get mugged there...
- Sorry, I don't know why this is on there.
- No, keep it, it's good.
It's delicious. So your father visits me...
He's in for a conference...
And he's only in for one night,
so we're going to get dirty,
we're going to layer
on the filth with a trowel...
Until we're dominated,
dominated in black...
Now, so, this is the predictable part...
Yelling at strangers, drugs and women...
- Okay, Earl, just take it easy.
- What?
I don't know most of these people and
you're talking about our father and women.
Your dad fucked other women. He
doesn't anymore. He doesn't now.
- Done. Are you still hurt? Get over it!
- Take it easy. Take it easy!
Your dad is fine, by the way.
He's doing just fine.
So I think we cabbed it down to
Max's, which was in its second phase
then trying to make our way through
that scene for like half an hour.
We felt like a couple of squares, but
we were sure they didn't get it either.
There was a lot more
mingling in the city then.
- Sounds pretty magical.
- It's better now.
I don't know. It's different.
Anyway - you all will never
know! Sorry!
- When was this?
- Uh - oh, ah... probably 78'?
Jesus. Where was I?
You were crapping in a diaper
somewhere.
We met this girl, very earthy and
Jewish, which your dad enjoyed...
Can you just get to the end? This
is like a root canal for me.
- Calm down.
- Don't tell me to calm down!
- Okay, okay! She wanted us both!
- Awh, my God. Oh my God.
No, that was her thing, and,
well... She's who we found.
I'm remembering it all again, we were
in this one room the whole time,
and as I look over to your dad,
who's - he's - he's going on top-
- well, it - it was his turn, so...
- Awh!
So, he raises his arm, and gives this
big, deep sniff of his armpit in and out,
in and out - and he yells at
this girl, "this is me!"
This is me! This is who I am!"
That was the closest your dad
ever got to poetry.
- Oh my God. What did she do?
- Oh, she was into it.
When I look in the mirror,
I change my face immediately.
So I never know what expression I'm making.
It's like a correction.
Now, I have a question. Being that you guys
are French, do you say "9/11" or "11/9?"
Run! Come on, let's go!
No. No, no, no, no, no.
Yes, yeah,
yeah you are the best.
Look at you, seeing us off.
Hey, their mom and me? We love
you, do you hear me? We love you.
Oh. Thanks. -Be good, you two!
Hey Alan. Bye.
- Alright. Bye mai, I enjoyed meeting you.
- Oh, likewise!
Get out of here.
Hey!
- Where's your green dress?
- Which?
- Uh, it hits, like, above your knees?
- The bright green one?
Yeah. I got us a reservation.
At a place.
It has a michelin star.
You did?
- Yeah.
- Already?
Wow. You're funny.
What is this? What happened
to music you can dance to?
Seriously. Change it, please.
Done.
Oh, thank you.
That's nice.
Oh, I like that.
Farrah.
Hey! Dance with us, you lump.
Each with his bonny lass,
hey, Alan! Get up!
The flight's leaving in ninety minutes.
Hey! Wake up!
It's Laguardia?
Fuck, Alan.
Hey, man.
Hey, you have a menthol?
Why do you think
I have a menthol?
I don't think you have a menthol, I
was just hoping you had a menthol.
- You have a cigarette?
- I have a menthol!
- Bacon, egg and cheese on a roll.
- Okay. Turkey bacon is okay?
Turkey bacon. No! Hold on,
never mind. Can I get uh...
Please will you give us...
You want chopped cheese? -Chopped cheese?
What's a chopped cheese?
Chopped cheese
is chopped cheese.
- Alright, I'll get a chopped cheese.
- You like.
You got it. You'll love it,
buddy.
Oh! You guys
have... e-cigarettes?
He-man! Do guys last very long?
No, but you know what, I can
always get them hard again,
and I have fun the second
round.
Hi, Texas man, how are you? I can
come just by having them sucked.
I always wanted
to raise my kids on a farm.
So starting a dairy
was a good way to do that.
So when you say you started a
dairy, what do you mean by that?
We bought fifty cows, learned
how to milk them the night...
Ow! Fuck!
Fuuuck.
Shit!
Hey, man, I'm Alan's brother
from upstairs. -Yeah.
I, you can see I...
Do you have any band-aids?
Alan doesn't have
any fucking band aids.
It's not a trick question, there's
blood all over the stairs.
Do you have any band aids?
It's all grass-fed milk.
And the fat is on top.
And the reason we leave the fat is because
that is where all the benefits are...
The promise of a new day.
You don't have to smoke
those by the window.
That's the point
of those things.
I disagree.
- You hungry?
- Yeah.
They have tuna.
And a fucking nice can opener.
- I don't think I like it here.
- You did last night.
Plus, it's bug-free.
I got up to pee and my mind
went crazy.
I started wondering how Ronnie was
doing at his sleepover with Deshawn...
I was trying really
hard not to text him, but...
What if they come back?
The brother and his girlfriend?
Look, you don't have to stay here if
the energy alignment makes you queasy.
You begged me to come. -I never
beg you to come, sweetie.
Jesus, look, just do
what you want.
He's hurt. How could I abandon
him and his bloody appendage?
I'm gonna take a walk.
Do you want to take a walk?
- What? My foot kills.
- I'm gonna get Ronnie.
I'm gonna surprise him.
I'll see you later.
Where're you going to take him?
Jennifer said that we
can crash at her place.
Maybe we'll do that.
Bring him here.
Bring him here?
This is sixty megahertz? I know about
refresh rates and megahertz...
It's as important as resolution.
I mean, it makes a difference, but
it's not a crucial difference.
The actual amount of time you'll actually
spend watching something at full 1080.
I mean, it's 720. It's great.
So I should just give you my
cash because I'm some deadbeat?
Do you want 240 megahertz? Do you want 600?
They're both a lot more money.
I was thinking about financing. -Oh, right.
Right. Well, you known,
I mean, not everything requires
full resolution.
Do you really need the best TV?
What about just a less shitty one; A
TV that's better than your current TV.
I mean, this TV here, that TV
there, you watch the Mets game,
it's the same Mets,
you know what I mean?
So what is your...
Installment plan?
I'll be honest with you, this isn't a
not good TV and it's almost affordable
as long as your credit's okay, like slightly
okay, you can finance it, you're able man.
Mat! It's a TV.
- It's really heavy.
- You can't pick it up?
- No, I can't.
- Try it.
Oh my God!
The marijuana plant has taken root
in Dugan and Martinez's household
like a weed.
What began as innocent
experimentation
quickly descended
into something far darker.
I began to notice anger
under Martinez's laugh.
Sadness beneath Dugan's smile.
It was clear to me that it was just a
matter of time before their true natures...
- You okay?
- Yeah. You?
- Watching TV?
- It's pretty bad.
I think there's a rat inside it.
There is not.
This bed is so comfy, right?
Yeah.
I didn't like it at first;
It's memory foam.
Memory foam?
- Did you brush your teeth today?
- Yes.
- What?
- You are a liar.
You've gotten so good at that.
Aw, man.
You used to be so obvious.
I didn't brush my teeth.
You lie more as you get older, you know.
And then, at some point,
you'll start lying less because you
realize there's not that much point.
That's when we can tell
each other actual secrets.
When?
When you're honest again.
Fifteen, twenty years.
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay, I'm not mad.
I'm just turning away because
your breath's so horrible.
I should fart on you. Get even.
Red riding had never
seen a wolf before.
She thought he was the most
beautiful brown dog...
Meanwhile, Mr. wolf ran slyly
through the wood, along the path,
and over the hill, until
he reached grandmother's...
Perhaps granny'd been ill,
with no one to look after her.
'Oh, grandmother, how you've changed!
What long ears you have',
said little red riding hood.
Oh, grand...
Your nose! What a long nose you have!
All the...
Grandmother was ever so grateful to
see red riding hood safe and sound.
The brave huntsman was very
proud of his trusty old gun.
Along the path to his home in
the forest...
where she lived happily
ever after.
What is this? Jesus. Where'd you get this?
Put it back.
Sorry. -Why is your bag
out in the hallway?
Mom, I need to show you
something in the closet.
You can when I'm done.
You wanna show mat?
There's something
you should see in the closet.
- What?
- I'd like to offer him dinner.
- We know, you cooked food.
- Did he call you or anything?
He told me he was going
to be away for two weeks.
- Where's the girlfriend?
- I don't know.
Oh, jeez. Let's just not make
a soap opera out of it, okay?
Ice cream!
Hey, the ice cream truck is here. Hey,
can we go, can we go get ice cream?
Let's go. My treat. Unless you've
got cash because otherwise
I have to go to an atm.
- Should we leave?
- And go where?
I don't know. We could
probably stay with Richard.
I mean, we could.
- Richard?
- What?
- Nothing.
- Is he gonna be mad?
- Richard?
- No, Alan.
Oh, Alan? I don't know. I don't
care, I can stay here if I want.
I don't give a shit what Alan
thinks...
Mind if I have some of this?
What is it, chicken? -It is...
it's chicken. I cooked it.
- Hi, I'm Andrea.
- Alan.
The bridge was like, uh, the bridge was
like floating... Or not floating...
It was suspended over the water...
It was a stunning waterfall...
It was really exciting.
Quebec is... the city of quebec
is really beautiful.
It's interesting. It's got
a really exciting...
Architecture to it. Like it's scaled
for the eighteenth century, you know,
for people who are, like,
half a foot shorter than us.
- Like, have you ever been to France?
- Yeah, I have.
- You went to France?
- Yeah.
Oh, well, I always assumed
that Paris felt like that.
What is that, Delaware?
No, I don't have credit cards
anymore.
So how bad can it be?
Just answer the fucking phone
or turn it off.
- Excuse me.
- He's heard worse.
Hi, this is mat, I'd love
to talk to you right now.
Hello?
I told you I would get
you a sample as soon as...
- Are you okay?
- Uh, no.
I don't want to talk about it.
We're gonna leave.
We would be home now.
Obviously, but our building
has bed bugs.
- They are spraying for it.
- You have bed bugs?
You brought your stuff here?
No, no, we don't, the building.
And my super swears that it's
not bed bugs, but radon.
Wow, those are two really
different things.
I told mat that I would
call Ronnie's dad.
He is a nightmare, but we can
totally stay with him. I will call.
Yeah, um, do whatever... I mean,
stay tonight, if you want,
my house is, you know... stay.
Ice cream! Come on, let's go, I
want to get some goddamn ice cream!
My vanilla ice mama.
Where goes the boy?
- Hey, Ronnie. Wait up!
- Where is the ice cream truck?
It's everywhere.
I'm sorry.
- How are you doing?
- I'm fine.
Hi, this is Farrah.
Please leave a message.
So yeah, I just felt like
coming in.
My brother's staying
with me... us,
and it's just,
it's a little, you know,
he's kind of,
he's kind of a lot.
It's kind of nice
to come see you guys, check in.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Hey, Fede, what's up, man?
You look good.
We're talking.
- Yeah, great.
- So did you bring the notices?
I have the notices.
I haven't opened them.
- Why not?
- I'm not opening mail right now.
- Wait, what's the deal?
- We're good here.
No, what happened? -They're evicting
him at the end of the month.
What? Are the girls
with their mother?
Two boys, two boys...
- They're with you?
- Yes.
- How many months are you behind?
- Three.
It's nothing.
I was doing a remodeling gig
with my sister's boyfriend.
- We talked about this already.
- Yeah, I know,
- I wasn't here.
- That's true, you weren't.
I know they know how much
I'm messing up.
I keep thinking about in twenty
years, they'll be saying,
"and then we got kicked out
of our apartment..."
"Cause our dad didn't check
the mail..."
"And that's when things got bad.
I didn't have a home,
and I started sucking cocks
on twelfth Avenue."
I keep thinking about my son sucking
cocks for money on twelfth Avenue.
Well...
You know, in this economy,
any job is a blessing.
Don't make a joke, man. -You
ever do video chats? Like, Skype.
- Yeah, all the time.
- I skyped with my dad last week.
Nice.
Yeah, he's kind of a prick, um,
that's just the way he is.
My brother can't stand him, which I think
is partly why I could never stand him.
I usually just talk to him on
the phone, but my mom was like,
no, no,
it's got to be a video chat...
Alan, we don't need
to talk about this right now.
I think she just wanted me to look at him
shaking, you know... his head, shaking.
I don't even remember what we... Oh yeah we
talked about this e-mail that he printed out,
and I was like, "dad, you don't
have to print out the e-mail",
you can just read it
off the screen."
I don't know. It made me pretty sad.
Maybe it was what my mom wanted...
She wanted me to look at him.
- Your dad was shaking?
- Yeah, he's got Parkinson's...
I said that, did I not say that?
Yeah, I bummed around.
You bummed around brasilia?
Is it a good place?
What is a "good" place?
You know?
Hey, Ronnie, how are ya, kid?
Oh, so, did Ronnie tell you
that he called me from a bodega?
He used his sandwich money.
You called him from a bodega,
Ronnie, you have a phone.
I didn't want you to know
I called, okay?
Hi, this is Farrah,
please leave a message.
Hey, it's me. I'm home...
It's, like, Thursday...
Afternoon. Um, mat's here.
Admit it, be honest,
you're embarrassed.
Your voice... someone should bottle
it up and throw it at terrorists.
- This is inappropriate. It is wrong.
- What's wrong?
I hope you're... You know...
I love you. Call me.
Good for you, you're saving him. Ronnie,
you are so damaged. How does that feel?
Alan, this is Richard, sorry. -Nice
to meet you. Sorry to impose.
It's fine. You're from Rahway,
right?
I'm from Mahwah.
So, you're the brother?
The brother, yeah.
You told me he was from Rahway.
- I said Ronkonkoma.
- Ronkonkoma's long island.
So you're from Mahwah,
but not Rahway or Ronkonkoma.
- You got it.
- Ever been to ho-ho-kus?
- Ho-ho-kus?
- Yeah.
Yeah, you guys are funny.
You ever live there?
Uh, no, but believe it or not,
my mother is from ho-ho-kus.
- It's true.
- Get out of town! She is?
She still live there? -Uh, no,
she's not with us anymore.
She's not!
I'm sorry, it's just...
Look, we'll be out of here
in a second.
- My charger's not charging.
- The power's out.
- What does that mean?
- What does that usually mean?
How are we going
to open cans now?
Look, if you wanna come,
you can come, too, okay.
Katie's fine with it;
I asked. Andrea, you did call me, I
am not leaving here without him.
Give me a break. -When you
are done with this, okay,
call me and we'll work it out.
- Richard! Get out of here, man!
- Guys!
You know, I'm really glad that we could
talk about this here in front of everyone.
He is fine. Ronnie, you're fine,
right?
- You like mat, he's your buddy.
- Ronnie hates me.
- What?
- No I don't.
He wants to leave. Let the
little fucker switch teams.
Can you sit up, please?
If you are uncomfortable, you
come and talk to me about it,
you do not go and call your dad
behind my back.
If you don't tell me you're uncomfortable,
I can't make you feel better.
- So you're an accountant?
- Uh, no, I'm a cpa, why?
Did she say that
I was an accountant?
- I'm a vp.
- Whoa, of what?
Metal sheds, barns, farm buildings, prefab.
We call them "ultra-durable."
I'd buy one.
Did you grow up on a farm?
No. I've been thinking
about incorporating.
- What do you think about that?
- What do you do?
Freelance web design.
- Are you asking me if that's what you do?
- No, that's what I do.
- All there right on that laptop?
- Yeah.
Well, how was your year?
Business? -Shut up.
- Yeah, don't incorporate.
- No?
No, it's fees, headaches. You know,
the money that you save on taxes
isn't worth it if your revenue is, um...
Abbreviated.
Time to get out, Richard!
- So do you, do you, um, have a card?
- Yeah.
Thanks. I got it.
Of course you can.
Why are you asking?
Bye, guys!
Guys, Ronnie's saying bye.
- Take it easy.
- Bye.
Gimme that! Give me the phone!
- It's Farrah. Hello.
- Hello.
- Hold on.
- Farrah!
I don't know.
Hello?
Farrah!
Hey... hey, I...
Enjoy your time with dad?
I am not mad. Stay with him
as long as you want.
- I'm going to go.
- What?
This is imposing.
It's really offensive and tacky.
No, it's fine.
You can stay another night.
I'll get some beer. -Yeah,
let's get some fucking beer.
No, you stay here.
I have to go to the restroom.
Okay. Wash your hands
after. Don't talk to strangers.
And don't call your dad
from a bodega.
Stop, man.
Do you remember that, um,
hurricane myra?
Was that a hurricane...
Myra... Meera?
When we turned all the radios up
after the power went out
so it would be all loud and freak
people out when it came back on?
Do you remember that?
Where'd you go to buy beer, Albany?
Little beer run to Albany?
- Stop!
- Where's the fucking beer?
Where is my beer?
Hey, Andrea?
- Andrea? Andrea, come here.
- Farrah,
please... just call me.
Your brother's taking
a little evening nap.
He's got the biorhythms
of a lion.
He has an enormous dick.
- Oh, I'm drunker than I thought.
- No, no,
I've heard it all before. In high
school they called him "rubber Buster."
Yeah. What side
does that come from?
What an interesting question.
Our dad has a medium,
medium-large penis, I think.
Our mother's dick
is very average.
And, um...
Mine, oh it's exactly the same
length as mat's to the millimeter,
but, uh, it's corkscrewed
and very thin, beet red,
and it wriggles uncontrollably and
when I get aroused, it turns black.
Gross.
- Is this okay?
- Sure.
Ronnie stares at you. -You said
that last night. I know. I get it.
He stares at you a lot.
I love being up early.
More than two hours of sunlight.
Take it easy.
Oh, crabby, I don't like to get
out of bed in the morning.
I want to stay in bed with
my blankies.
- Fuck off.
- -Fuck yourself!
- You fuck yourself.
- Fuck you, motherfucker!
- No, fuck you!
- Fuck you in the eyes and...
What do you guys wanna
do today?
This is it. This is what
I'm doing today.
- Jesus.
- -What?
- No, what?
- -You're like a fucking funnel.
Like a fucking funeral pile.
Funeral pyre?
Is that what you're trying to say?
Fucking cumulonimbus
with fucking legs.
- You got a hairball.
- Yeah, I gotta push it down.
I gotta push it down... I got a hairball
in my throat, and I gotta push it down.
I got to take a piss.
You guys cover me?
She left me.
- She left me.
- We know.
Don't discuss me with him. -We don't
talk about you, just, come on, we know...
- I didn't ask her to marry me.
- Oh.
She started shaking.
I was just holding her hand.
So I let go of her
hand and I walked away.
You were just scared.
It was like vomit.
She told me that I was lost.
That my eyes
don't give enough to her.
That she doesn't know why
I'm so sad and angry.
And that it's hurtful to be around.
Me. That she's dried up.
Well, yes, yeah, I am sad!
I'm very sad! I'm very
fucking sad and angry!
Why are you angry?
You don't seem so angry...
I am. I'm enraged!
I don't know how else to be...
That's silly! You're lucky that
you have someone who knows you
- and wants to help you.
- Are you fucking kidding me?
What did you say? -I grabbed her by
the shoulder and screamed at her.
I called her terrible things.
I just wanted her to say yes!
Just yes, I will, I
will marry you!
So we gonna bomb this bridge
or what?
No!
I'll never see Ronnie again.
This is insane! Get me out of here!
Get me out of here!
- Jesus! Save me!
- Shut the fuck up!
Save me!
Yeah, it's me. Still here.
Do you love me?
Ok.
I love you.
I don't know...
Twenty-four hours.
- We have food spoiling, so...
- Just tell me. Do you love me?
I don't know.
- Should he just call me back?
- Go away.
Yes, yeah, sure, I'll wait.
- You can be honest with me.
- Oh, thank you.
You definitely need me. Right? You have
told me that you love me so many times...
You told me our first week
together, that you loved me.
You told me when you were crying... crying
in the middle of the fucking night...
Jesus Christ! Who needs this?! Who
needs this in their fucking life?!
Yeah, who needs this?
Who needs this?
You wanna go? You wanna leave
my brother's apartment?
I can do what I want,
you piece of shit!
Do you even have some
place to go at this point?
- God, has he always been like this?
- I don't, I'm not...
Have I always been like this,
huh?
Yes! For as long
as I've known you.
For as long as I've known you,
and how long has that been, huh?
I don't understand what that
even means.
Okay, okay, come on, come on,
it's nap time. Come on.
It's time to take a nap. -No. You're
not just going to lead me away.
I'm all fucked out today. -I don't
think you can help acting like this.
Look at your face. You want to get me off
with that fucking face, well fuck you.
Fuck you!
If you want to get me off
then stop.
Stop sweating and running and then
maybe I could fucking get off,
maybe I'll come like a fucking
spindletop.
- Mat! What are you doing?!
- Right now!
It never stops.
It just never fucking stops.
It never fucking stops.
It never fucking stops.
Don't you dare.
I'm sorry. I'm just showing
everybody everything today.
Call me if you need to.
Hey, whoa, whoa whoa.
Just fucking leave it, man.
- I have to charge my phone.
- Just please fucking calm down.
Hey. Hey, you're in my bed.
Just kidding. I got food.
I got food from the arabs.
- What's that?
- Chopped cheese. It's good.
So. I went up to that bar
on 14th and Amsterdam.
I think that place is a front
for something, don't you?
- What do you want to do tonight?
- I don't know.
What do you think of my lighting set-up?
Did you use all our candles?
This is not good.
Mat, hi! This is your mom.
When you can, please call me.
Earl is apparently in some kind of bind
in his place in... Chinatown, I think?
I think it's some sort
of physical trouble.
Needs a big strong man's help.
I don't know if you're avoiding
us, or what.
We don't have much right now, but if
you need, like, a hundred dollars,
we can probably scrape that up.
Okay, love to hear from you.
Bye, mat.
- Going somewhere?
- Downtown.
- Mom call you?
- Mmm, no.
Okay.
Hi. Did I call you?
I've had some painkillers.
That's okay.
- Anyone else coming?
- Uh, no, it's just me.
- Did you need something?
- You two doing alright?
Oh, we're fine. He couldn't
make it. He's sorry.
- I think Farrah is great, you know.
- Oh, uh, yeah.
I think she knows
how to handle you.
- Tricky business.
- Yeah. So...
My fucking fingers don't work
so I've had a little surgery.
Oh, Jesus, Earl.
- Does that hurt?
- Some things hurt, yeah.
You want something?
I have pills, a few left.
- Uh, maybe I'll have a drink?
- Oh, yeah, try that stuff.
Did you need me to, uh,
lift something? -Yes.
Oh, shit.
Fuck, Earl.
It's your dog. Manzanera.
Manzanera, I know.
I've absorbed it.
I'll need a new one.
I'm sorry I had a little
Susan-left-xanadu moment.
It's very heavy, Earl.
It's okay, forget about it.
See those little clementines on the table?
You see where this is going.
Oh, that's nice. Thanks.
Hello.
Hi.
- Alan?
- Yeah?
Hi. Beatrice? Oh, you wouldn't
remember me.
Maybe you would. I was
at Lindsay's wedding.
Oh my God. You might
not remember that either.
I was sort of a kid, too.
Not really.
This is definitely
the quietest I've seen him.
- He's not "the Earl".
- Won't be gone for long.
- I hope so.
- I have to go to the bathroom.
- Okay, which?
- Just a tinkle.
I can help. -No, it's okay.
I've done this before.
You know those water pouches they
carry through the desert in westerns
made out
of a buffalo's intestine?
Middle of the desert,
some Indian shoots a hole
in the pouch with his rifle
and it just leaks...
And leaks and leaks,
and leaks and leaks...
- Hey, where are you?
- The feast of San Gennaro.
- Where are you? Are you alive?
- The feast of San Gennaro!
Jesus, that's awful.
Did you see Earl?
- Yeah, I saw Earl.
- Is he still breathing?
Yeah, tell mom he's home,
I guess.
Michael's here. He's got some,
little... girl with him.
Michael's there?-Yeah,
he will not stop talking.
- Get over here. I'm dying over here.
-I guess I can come.
- They're boring the fuck out of me.
-Alright.
- Hey, guys. What's up?
- Oh, God, are you okay?
- Oh, yeah, it's fine, I'm fine.
- Fine? You don't look fine.
- It's really good to see you...
- You look like shit!
- Yeah, you look like shit.
- I'm fine, really...
He's fine. He's totally fine.
He says he's fine, he's fine.
I'm Alan.
She's sort of my... thing.
It's a cash only bar
and I've got a credit card.
It's about the fluidity
of movement...
Oh, Michael was telling me
a story about Farrah.
She sounds so cool. She's
a dancer. That's exciting.
She's an office manager
at a dance company.
Even if you ignore the storytelling,
which is pretty primitive.
- What do you do?
- I'm a painter.
- So do you do like abstract stuff?
- I'm trying to.
To be honest, I'm kind of
in a crisis right now.
I want to get
past representation, but...
I'm sorry, I thought you
were, like, in a crisis.
I'm sure you'll get past it.
Uh, did you know your
brother poured a beer on me?
- What?
- You poured a beer on me.
I hope you see someone about your issues.
Do you see someone?
Don't do this. -You are
cruisin' for a bruisin'.
What is this, some fantasy?
Doing coke off a hood?
Why are you doing that?
You're snorting bugs and dirt.
- He's a little drunk.
- I am a little drunk.
But I'll tell you what. If you
stare at any asshole long enough,
you're going to want to stick
your tongue in it.
You got a hairball. -I got a hairball
and I need someone to shove it down!
Get some of that.
Babe!
Fuck!
It's the wrong fucking stop!
This is perfect.
This is, like, it's like magic.
This is exquisite.
Don't describe what you're
doing while you're doing it.
You're, like, killing it
with words.
Hey, guys? Guys?
Yeah, if you could hold for just a minute?
We're shooting something.
- It'll just be a minute.
- What are you shooting?
- It's a movie.
- Cool.
- Dave for Jo.
- Go for Jonah.
- Lock it up. We're gonna roll.
- Copy that. Lookin' it up.
I got a couple of guys here
but we're holding. They're cool.
- That's cool, man. Thanks a lot.
- Yeah.
Oh, hey, actually if you could do me a favor
and just hold off on lighting that up.
What? There's fake fucking
fog everywhere.
Yeah, but, it's just,
I'm allergic to cigarette smoke.
He's allergic! -It makes me cough.
You'll hear me cough.
It's actually illegal to smoke
cigarettes in New York City parks.
Where the fuck are they?
I don't see anyone.
They're there. It's just we don't
want anyone walking through.
- There?!
- It's an important scene.
Oh, shit, I see, mat... Oh, dude,
look, they're right there!
The thing is you need to be really quiet
because it's a really important scene.
Yeah, it's an important scene. You wanna
direct, don't you? You got vision!
It's the real deal, guys.
Yeah, we're really killing
ourselves for these guys.
They're really
making it happen.
I'm just ready to get
some sleep, you know?
You're ready for some sleep?
What? -You just said you're
ready for some sleep.
What are you, four-years-old? You want
me to warm you up a bottle of milk?
You want your "binky"?
All clear.-Hey, you guys are good.
Thank you.
You've been patient.
Have a good night.
Thanks, man! You have
a good night, too.
Lock it up! We're gonna roll.
Goddammit.
Okay, Roger, copy that!
Let's take this hill, boys.
Grab your cocks!
Dave to Jonah. You there?
What was that?
"Hey guys, this is Jonah.
Some guys took my walkie.
You gotta stop them! Guys!"
What the fuck?
Scotch!
Scoooootch!
Good luck finding it.
Oh, shit! That goddamn mouse!
That goddamn mouse!
Oh, shit, I got it!
- What?
- I got it in my hands!
It's in my hands! Open the window!
Open the window!
Open the window!
- What're you going to do?
- What do you mean?
- What're you going to do?
- What, you want to keep it?
No!
Hey, scotch!
Scotch!
Whiskey.
Hello?
Whoever took this,
you want to return it, please?
- Is anyone there?
- There's nobody here.
- Hello? Hey.
- There's nobody on this walkie.
- I know someone's there.
- But hey,
if you see that punk kid pa, who told
me I couldn't smoke a cigarette,
tell him to pop his zits
and go suck a dick.
You're getting this pa
into a lot of trouble.
He's very hurt.
Will she come back?
I hadn't even thought about it.
I miss her.
I don't want to start over.
I want to work on it.
I love her, you know?
I truly do.
Hey, hey, put some music on. Come on,
play some music from your phone.
Let's stay up till
the sun rises. Come on!
Let's stay up till
the sun... come on.
Till the sun comes up!
Alan, come on!
Good morning.
You've got vomit...
Oh! Jesus.
It's jammed! It's jammed shut!
Would you turn the music off?
What, do you think Ronnie
did that? Did you do that?
No I didn't do it.
This is her goddamn natural
peanut butter.
- She never picks up a fucking sponge.
- Calm down.
Don't tell me to calm down.
Here. Eat a fucking banana.
Oh, charging, yeah.
Come on, baby. Charging.
Can you hand me that pen?
Hello?
What?
Oh.
You should have a blog, man.
Or something. You are funny.
From time to time.
I do, grandpa.
Here, take a look.
- Where do you get these pictures?
- Just online.
"All you need to make a movie
is a gun and a head."
You can scroll down.
- Who was that calling? Andrea?
- Or not.
"Building collapsed in Mumbai;
Scores missing".
I'm going to take a shower.
I stink.
Fucking peanut butter.
Fucking peanut butter.
You know, if you wash some of
the dishes, the pile goes down.
I'll look at the door if you want. How
did it lock from the inside anyway?
It's kind of unsafe.
Alright, what was that?
A faberge egg, what do you think it was?
It was a glass. Jesus, I'll pay for it.
It's more important to me
that you stop breaking things.
I'm ready to be a better man
for you.
I'm ready to be a better man
for you.
I'm getting sick.
I've got phlegm.
- Something funny over there?
- Just...
You, being useful. It's, like,
a parody of usefulness.
It's alright man. I'll do 'em.
Be my guest.
Why don't you just keep it? -It's finky,
even if you listen to it ironically.
I didn't choose it ironically. -Oh, come
on, you listen to everything ironically.
What did I see in there?
Is that Dennis Wilson?
- You gave me that!
- Oh, I doubt that.
Yes, you did. You said, "some
of this stuff is overwrought",
"but he drowned in a puddle,
blah blah," which he didn't,
by the way, he drowned
in a marina.
No, he drowned in a puddle,
and who cares? He was miserable.
No, it was a Marina. Did you know Longfellow's
wife died when her dress caught fire?
It was a marina, he was diving. She was sealing
her children's hair in an envelope with hot wax
when her dress caught fire and he tried
to wrap her up in a rug, but she died.
Honestly... Oh, fuck! Ah! Shit!
What is this?
Why is this shit...
Fuck, I thought I got
everything out.
Why are you such a useless
fuck-up?
Like, the only time you go out of
your way is to fuck something up.
- That's where your effort goes.
- What are you searching for?
- Band-aids!
- I got band-aids.
What the fuck are you waiting for?
Get the goddamn band-aids! Ah!
Ah, fuck. The band-aids
are in the bathroom.
Fuck!
Goddammit!
It's busted. You busted it. You're
like a fucking kodiak bear.
Fuck! What?
Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Calm down! Hey. Calm down.
You calm down.
Fuck you.
You got a hairball, bro!
You don't even want me to articulate.
You're lucky I can't fucking string
a sentence together to tell you about
yourself, your fucking zero, nothing self!
Yeah? Yeah? You tell me you
want to be a better man?
Is that true? Is that true?
Well then whisper it
in my fucking ear, you fuck!
Get on your knees
and propose it to me!
I love how you act like I'm not
the only person,
the only person, who'll put up
with your shit!
Like I don't have the power to pull the fucking
plug out of your drain! You'd have no one!
Yeah, that was articulate! Like,
three-quarters articulate!
You're a marginal figure! -Where
are you going, you leaving?
You running away?
I'm calling a nuthouse, asshole,
for guess who! You!
Ah! Haha! Hah, good one!
Ah, fuck!
When I recognize you in myself, when
I recognize parts of you in myself,
I get sick. You're rotten, hopeless,
hypnagogic, you're just...
You have a black
heart. You're half-awake.
- What if I turned into you?
- And content to be...
Half-awake. What if I turned into you?
I see dad.
I see him in you, and I see him in me, and
everything you hate about him, you have!
I don't want to reject you,
I don't want to cut you out,
but all you do
is disappoint me, every time.
It breaks my...
Here. Read it.
What is this, something
you wrote for Farrah?
- You spelled 'cum' with a 'u'.
- It says what I think of you.
'Hypna-goggic'? 'Hypna-gaga'... I don't
even know what that fucking means.
Mat!
Mat, look at me!
Mat.
Mat. Mat!
He and I shared a fire.
He made the fire.
His English was terrible.
Or French, all that crooked
Canadian French.
And the ceilings were so tall,
it - it - it made it look like
our reflections were spinning.
Turning, like leaves
turning in the wind? And...
I remembered you, crying.
Huh. Look.
You okay?
You're stuffed up.
We might have some nasal stuff.
I already looked.
I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go get some.
- Taking your laptop?
- I don't know. Yeah.
You hot in your coat?
No. I'm fine.
- You hungry?
- Yeah, sure.
Make me a fucking sandwich.