The New King of Comedy (2019) Movie Script

Follow your dreams and don't hold back
No matter how long it may take
Follow your dreams and don't hold back
(An Actor Prepares)
Just like the howling wind
ls someone hurt?
Let's go check it out
Old man, where are you hurt?
It hurts
I don't know...everywhere
Let me help you
ls this a scam? ls it for real?
Hello, Emergency?
I'm here at Da Peng
Pardon me Sir...I'm also an actor
Your acting is not good.
Pain is the essence of a scam
You're not showing enough emotion!
Not convincing enough!
Your 'Ai-ya' not gonna do it
You were just hit by a car.
You can't just say 'Ai-ya'
You need to be believable
otherwise, you won't get
any sympathy from the audience really hurts
No kidding dude!
This is lame, be serious!
Watch me
I'm going to pass out!
What...don't act smart!
Fainting is fine, but don't rush it
The blood looks good
Too bad your acting lacked in the beginning
You've already lost your audience
Just sharing some tips with you
Don't take it personally, Sir
The ambulance's here
Make way!
Mild fracture in left chest,
third rib bone...not life-threatening
Let's go
I'm so sorry, Sir
ls she a family member?
She's just crazy...ignore her!
My leg...
Hey! What the hell are you doing?
Don't you know how to act?
You're in pain! Why aren't you screaming?
Can't you act?
Well, in my own experience...
When people are in pain,
they don't always scream out loud
What the hell are you talking about?!
Hey mister...come here
Can you do a painful reaction?
That's so fake
Let me show you
That's real! See! No screaming, no shouting
Please tell the director
Director, what do you think?
- I...
- Director?
Get the hell out!
Need extras to play dead.
Must keep the make-up on for two days
- How much?
- Who wants to go?
$400 for two days
That's it?!
I'll go!
Any chance I can show my face?
Are you bargaining with me?!
If you show my face, just a meal will do
Deal! Let's go!
ls she crazy?
Come on, let's eat. Food's getting cold
You're the birthday boy
We can't eat until you start first
Happy birthday!
Your make-up's very unique
It's quite terrifying!
ls acting fun?
I get to play a corpse this time
There's a close-up
so I can show my acting skills
Show your acting skills by playing a corpse?
Death makes an interesting context for actors
If you were chopped dead alive...
The feel of that scene...
What did you say?!!
Say it again!!
Birthdays should be a happy occasion
Dreamy, stop the nonsense
and remove your make-up!
But I still have a shooting tomorrow
You really think you're a big movie star?!
You guys grew up together, right?
Look at Bobby!
He's now a big-time lawyer!
It's nothing much...nothing to brag about
And look at Peggy!
She's happily married...
With a great husband!
But look at you now!
We'd hoped you would become a lawyer
Not a corpse!
Everyone has their own talents...even a corpse
I'm an extra but I can take care of myself
I have my own dreams too
You're thirty already and
you've been an extra for over a decade
Have you ever played the lead?
I believe in my talents. If I work hard...
I can definitely make it as the lead actress
Sorry, I choked on water!
Mum, am I right? can do it
That's bullshit!
You've spoiled her!
I'm giving you one last chance!
Take that thing off and burn it!
Cleaver is not flammable, right?
Then I'll add one more!
You asked for it!
Wait a second!
Your emotions are so inspiring!
Dad, hold the cleaver and hop again
I want to record this
Ready, jump!
Daughter, what are you doing?
Auntie, we'll be leaving now
So sorry!
Get out!
I'm disowning you!
And take your trash with you!
But Dad...that's your trash
I don't give a damn!
You total bum!
Get the hell out of here!
Please calm down!
I'll beat you up everytime I see you!
Can anyone act here?!
I can!
Do a happy face
Do a sad face
Alright, come with me
Who can do an angry look?
Me! Me! Me!
Get lost!
You try
Okay, very good
Someone react to a deathly blow
Me! Me! Me!
Can you specify the type of deathly blow?
What's with all the questions?
Get lost if you can't do it...
How about "Icy Palm Attack"?
Okay, Icy Palm Attack
so cold...
See a doctor if you're sick...
Don't give it to me!
You! Try!
Why are you dragging me here? I'm not going!
Just want to bring her some soup
Soup for her?! Are you on her side?
Just pretend we're passing by
If I see her, I'm gonna hit her! Don't stop me!
Or I'll hit you too!
You're asking for it! What's wrong with you?!
Why do you need to know everything?
I just want to build up my character
Build my ass!
No one will even see you! Are you the lead?
Would you get it if I gave you the context?
You won't! You're just an extra!
Go, come with me
That was intense
Couldn't you be nicer?
Why blow up over a simple question?
None of you business!
She's serious about acting. Can't you see that?
You know who I'm talking about!
God is watching what you're doing!
Be careful...karma!
Crazy! PA...come here!
I'm sorry
Do you know who I am?
- Good
- Let's go
Your acting in Icy Palm Attack
had a lot of depth. It hit the mark
It was alright
The key is imagination...
immerse yourself into the scene
That's amazing!
I'm Young
I'm Dreamy
You're reading this book too?
You like "King of Comedy" too?
I love it! I memorized all the lines!
Wanna give it a go?
Right here?
Why not?
Are you leaving?
Where are you going?
And then?
Off to work
Do you have to go to work?
Who will take care of me if I don't work?
What now?
I'll take care of you
My boyfriend's here
Hey, that's the wrong line
No, my boyfriend's really here
See you!
Who's that guy?
Some colleague
Yes. Let's go!
You can have my sausage
Let's share
I put $4,000 into our wedding fund this month
You only make $5,000 a month.
If you give me $4,000...
How would you survive?
$1 ,000 is enough for me
I get meals on the movie set
so it doesn't cost me a penny
Let me contribute $4,500...
So take back $500
No, don't worry
We agreed to half each
I thought my love was deeper
But turns out, your love is just as deep
You're really giving him your money?
Of course
Then why not give it to me?
But I'm not getting married to you!
You might as well be with me then
Lend me your soap
Why do you keep staring at Mimi?
Do you like her?
Pisses me off if you say that!
Looking doesn't mean I like her!
I despise her from the bottom of my heart
She's so cheap!
Don't you think Mimi's pretty?
Beauty means nothing...
If she's got nothing inside
You know why I love you?
Because you have taste
Of course!
I want to introduce you to my parents
They'll be so relieved to know we're together
That's for sure
Actually, I'm busy with a big project now
When accomplished...
Your Mum and Dad will be so proud of me
Not to brag but, I, Charlie...
Shall be the next Bill Gates!
Aren't you being too ambitious?
Let's be realistic and
go for number two or even three?
I am very humble and realistic!
How many eyes does Bill Gates have?
How many eyes do I have?
He doesn't have more and I don't have any less
- ls that right?
- Yes!
Whatever he can do, I'm capable of it too!
Absolutely right!
Listen to me. You must believe you're the best!
Not be second or third place!
You are number one!
Stop thinking about those online videos
Go for the big global movies!
Actually, an international production is
looking for Chinese actors
That's your chance!
But they're looking for Snow White
You're Snow White!
How many eyes does Snow White have?
How many eyes do you have?
So why can't you be Snow White?
Tell me! Why not?
Tell me!
Ask yourself...
Am I right?
Doesn't it make sense?
You are...
Snow White!
You really want to get beauty injections?
Well...Snow White is a Western classic
Reckon adding some
Western features to my face...
Wow, you've even thought of that
Famous actors do it all the time
Marlon Brando went
all out to get the Godfather role
He did a lot to change his face
Bullshit! You just want to look better
with cosmetic surgery
You wrong me!
Getting prettier is surely a good thing
I found this amazing beauty App!
SoYoung Medical Aesthetic App
It shows all the information and
the different cases
I actually know a 80 year old well known brand
Here we are
Doctor, here's a new customer for you
What would you like to do?
I want to look like her
Are you sure?
It's my first time. I'm a bit nervous
This style is also my first time.
I'm a bit nervous too!
You do Chinese faces more often right?
I usually do humans
Do you want the hair too?
What hair?
There's hair all over
Right...they're more hairy...
But most people won't notice
It's hard not to notice
You're so professional.
But I'll pass on the hair
What a shame!
The effect will only lasts for two days
It's simple...very quick
Doctor, I want a tall upward nose
More upwards...your nostril will be
as big as a yin-yang hotpot
Yin-yang hotpot?
Whatever you like
Why do you keep looking at that gorilla?
I need to look at it so I know what to do!
You wanted this gorilla look, right?
No, not that!
I wanted this!
Why didn't you say so?!
I want a mirror!
Don't look! You can't take it!
Relax, I can fix it!
Just lie down
Alright, it's done!
How is it? Let me see...
How do I look?
It's gorgeous!
How gorgeous?
Too gorgeous to look at
It's much better now
(Snow White audition. Line up here)
Wait there
What do you want?
I'm here to audition
Which role?
Snow White
Because I want to audition for Snow White
Say again?
Why am I repeating?
Not sure I heard you right
I'm here to audition for Snow White
Say that again
Never mind...sorry
Stay there!
Stop that woman!
Don't let her go!
Stop her!
Get her!
Don't Run!
Stop her!
Come with me!
Wanna run?
You can't get away?
Wanna run?
I'm so sorry!
It was just my wishful thinking...
I shouldn't have come!
Boss, take a look
What do you think?
Get to work!
Please don't!
I won't do it again!
Start working!
What's going on?
Don't move
Please tell me what's going on?
You got the role
Director, we're almost ready
I got it?!
We're ready...
Hurry up!
(Miracles happen here)
Let's go!
May I know what this scene's about?
Don't worry about it.
We'll tell you after we shoot
What's the character's emotional state?
Good idea! Actor's on the way...
Stay here!
Okay. Switch to the actor
Lose the double! Actor, ready for your lines!
Take her away!
Hurry up!
Move aside!
Go ahead! I'm not afraid to die!
Keep beating
Actor, take a break. Double, take over
Thank you
- Come
- Tilt your head up
Tilt your head
- Stay sharp
- Come on...hold up your finger
Point your finger up
Posture, don't collapse
Can't believe you killed me!
- Cut!
- Cut!
The Seven Dwarves have
finally avenged Snow White
This is so touching
Aren't I supposed to be Snow White?
What the hell are you doing?
Get lost!
- Sorry, Director
- Take her away
Ready for Snow White's scene
Mr. Marco
Tell that 'has-been' to hurry up.
Need him on set
Who's the 'has-been'?
Watch your mouth!
(Snow White - Bloodbath in Chinatown)
Make way! Make way! Mr. Marco is coming!
We'll do company move after this scene...
Director, please pick the female
version of Snow White
Any pretty face will do...there's only one shot
Mr. Marco is here! Stay calm!
Attention, everyone! Make way!
Go away! Stay away!
Go away! Don't come over!
Stay calm! No pushing!
No touching! No photo!
Mr. Marco...
In this scene, you will play Snow White
The evil witch tricked you into eating...
A poisonous banana and then you became a man
The prince got too drunk to realize...
that he slept with you
Did I do him? Or did he do me?
Both ways
When the prince woke up,
he found out you were a man
He couldn't accept it so he tried to kill you
But you killed him first
The prince's men tracked you down in Chinatown
They attacked you
You were badly hurt...
your guts came spilling out
Isn't that gruesome?!
It's my tribute to Zhang Che's
Aesthetic of Violence
Zhang Che, Aesthetic of Violence
Do you get it?
Not fine or not.
It's whether you get it or not?
What do you think?
It's hard to say
Of course I get it! You meant violent right?
Let's do the scene when you get stabbed
and you're angry. Okay?
Okay, let's begin!
Mr. Marco, let me set up the props
Take one
I am so angry...
Mr. Marco, can you try to be really angry?
I already said I'm angry
You all heard it, right?
Director, only you didn't hear what I said
Do you think I'm lying?
It's hard to say
Then don't say anything! No one is forcing you!
Can you be more girly?
That's what I said!
I'm a princess after all
You are really slow
Come on!
One more time!
I am so angry...
I am really...
Bloody hell!
What the hell is this?
Cut! Wrong lines
What the...You thought that was a line?
How did my guts become hotdogs?
Mr. Marco, listen to me.
A New Year film can't be too violent
What about all that "as..." violent crap?!
- Aesthetic of Violence
- Attention! Attention!
Attention, everyone! Attention!
Mr. Marco is pissed off!
I was just about to get into character!
Why did you interrupt me?
Even though this is
a movie with aesthetic of violence... can still be innocent
Seeing my guts as hotdogs...
I almost burst out laughing!
How can I get into character?
The business side is very complicated
You're an amazing actor...
the hotdogs won't be a problem for you!
Of course it won't!
But you're insulting
the audience's intelligence
New Year movie
You might as well add some cute kidneys!
- Props! Get me a kidney!
- Copy that
Right away!
Director, would this work?
Dip it into the ketchup and let's see...
Oh my God! So bloody and innocent!
That's it
Ready! Actors in position!
Not yet cut?!
I'm worn out!
Attention everyone! Attention!
Mr. Marco is here. Make way!
Attention everyone! Attention!
Mr. Marco is coming!
Stupid director...making a stupid movie!
In the old days, I would've slapped him!
Why don't you now?
I'm a classy gentleman now!
What are you laughing at?!
You fool
Are you mocking me?
How dare you mock me?
You think I'm funny, huh?!
Attention, everybody! Attention!
Mr. Marco is kicking!
No kidding! Mr. Marco is kicking!
No touching! No photo!
Self control!
ls it really you?
ls it a special make-up?
Everything's okay?
I'm fine
You can have my meal
Don't worry
Excuse me
Mister, can I get another meal please?
One for each person
You 'extras' are always so greedy!
Get lost!
If you come back, I'll call the cops!
I told you guys earlier
God is watching everything you do!
Why are you always so mean?!
Aren't those lunch boxes for eating?
What the hell?!
Tell me!
Tell you what?!
Aren't those lunch boxes for eating?
Yes, so what?
Why didn't she get one?
That girl with special make-up
Answer me!
Calm down!
- Why didn't she get one?
- Calm down!
Why didn't she get one?
Hold on!
Why did you hit yourself with a bottle?
I couldn't hit him, could I?
Didn't you see how big he was?
Did you see our daughter?
So we just leave?
I saw Marco on set the other day
- Who's Marco?
- That Marco
- Who?
- Never mind
He was in a bad mood...
he kicked away my lunch box
So I asked the PA for another one,
but he wouldn't give it to me
But suddenly as I was leaving, he gave me one
ls good luck coming my way?
You're just an extra. Don't overthink it
Have some respect for extras
Many stars started as extras
Sun Li, Carina Lau, Zhao Liying...
Are you as talented as them?
We're all special in our own ways
And I work harder than them
You're delusional
So work hard and you'll have a chance
No one gets discovered
just standing on the streets
Excuse me, Miss
Would you like to be in a movie?
Who are you?
She's a famous producer
Hi, I'm Dreamy...I'm an actor
Hi...we're looking for actors in our movie
Are you interested?
Yes, I want to try!
Oh sorry...
Not you
It's you
Yes, I've been talking to you
How about it? We're just over there
Don't be sad
Consider it a game
Don't cry
They picked me for the female lead!
I know nothing. Why would they pick me?
I went in and they removed my make-up.
Said only two lines...
Then I got the lead! What should I do now?
What do you mean? It's a great opportunity!
I would trade fifty years of my life
for this chance!
But I don't want it!
I'm so scared. I don't want to be an actor!
It's okay...don't cry
I'm so innocent,
the industry will pollute my innocence
I don't mind to be polluted,
perhaps you can tell them...
I can take your place
I beg them to take you...
But they said they would rather die
They would rather die?
Yes, they said they would rather die
- Would rather die
- What should I do?
Car's here
Okay. ls everything fine?
- Yes...
- Hi
You still here
Thank you for giving me the chance
- Do your best
- Sure
You want a ride?
Sure, I live nearby
Thank you
Take the back seat
Mimi moved out just like that?
Everything's gone
She even took my soap and sanitary pads
Told you so
If I hadn't ask Mimi to eat with me...
they would have picked me
Even without Mimi,
they might not have picked you
Don't people said 'hard work pays off'?
So that opportunity
wasn't meant for you, but for Mimi
But if she doesn't try her best,
she will eventually screw up
Hang in there. You'll make it!
You're right! I'll try even harder
I'll send out my CV all over China,
I want everyone knows
what acting actually means!
Well said!
Be positive!
I'm short on cash for my start-up,
but I still have hope
How much do you need?
Just use the wedding fund
No! Then we would never get married
Maybe I can work overtime or get a second job
Let me worry about it
I don't want you to suffer
Hey boss
Excuse me
I need money.
Do you have any work that pays more?
Are you serious? Who do you think you are?!
I'll do anything
Please...thank you
Are you kidding me?
She looks perfect
Get lost! Don't know what the hell
you're saying!
Who hired the double?
Old hag, I beg you! Put on some clothes!
- Get out!
- Man, she's scary!
Sorry, Director
I didn't know she looks hideous unclothed
Are you joking? This double sucks!
Bad figure and sagging skin
And black dots on her ass
Sorry, Director
You might as well have asked me to do it!
- Go get me another one!
- Dreamy
Are you okay?
I'm fine
The director said my body and skin suck
And begged me to put my clothes back on
That was it, I am super fine
Ask the howling wind, how long is the road
Before I can see my dreams
Will I survive the waves and the wilderness
(Hiring Extras for Drowning Scene $400 per day)
Before I make it with a smile
The wind does not begin or end
It just has to surge and go
No questions asked
No worries about the long journey
and wild waves
Let's go with the wind
No matter the seasons change
Follow your dreams and don't hold back
No matter how long it may take
Follow your dreams and don't hold back
Just like the howling winds
Do I need to move?
Have you ever seen a moving statue?
No. Why don't you use actual statues?
Because they're too expensive. Get lost!
Dreamy, are there any acting tips
to be a statue?
I see...just meditate to appear lifeless
I'll try this
Let's begin!
The prince wakes up and
discovers that Snow White is a man
Scene four. Shot one. Take one
Who are you?
Snow White
I slept with you?
What are you doing?!
It's only lust for you but love for me!
Why so upset?
Your character lie for chips...
You no pain heart, understand?
What?! But...
Director, get someone to teach him English
Come on. Let's do the close-up
of me killing him first
Everybody, I no time, quickly, quickly!
Mr. Marco, do you know your lines?
Of course! Hurry up...
Okay, ready!
What's the line?
It's all my fault, blame it on my body,
you heartless man!
Okay, let's begin
It's all...fault...
Whose fault?
It's all my fault, blame it on my body,
you heartless man!
I got it! Again!
It's all my fault...
Blame it on my booby...
Sorry Mr. Marco, it should be "body"
Who cares!
Just a bit off
Kids watch movies during New Year...
Better be careful with pronunciation
Kids don't care about pronunciation!
Shall we say "1 , 2, 3, 4, 5".
We can dub the lines later
Counting numbers?
Are you insulting me?
No, this is easier
Easier? Why didn't you say so!
You wasted my damn fool!
Come on, shoot!
1 , 2, 3...
1 , 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
Don't interrupt! Shut up and shoot!
1 , 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...
1 , 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
Counting numbers make it more difficult!
Tell me! Who on earth can do this?
My Chinese's not good. Let's do it in English
Okay. Rolling
Thousand wrong ten thousand wrong
My meat wrong
You negative...
Heart people
What's he doing?
Mr. Marco. Are you okay?
Can't you understand simple English?
No, I don't...what happened actually
Of course you won't understand...
but if you insist...
I'll tell you
Attention! Everyone attention!
Mr. Marco is giving acting lessons.
No photo! No touching!
I killed my beloved with a knife
My emotions are so complex!
Sad, fearful, selfish, arrogant,
excited, shy...and so on
Those emotions...
They are just like...just like this...
...and that...
What do you know? And you interupted me?!
So sorry. I thought you were having seizure
My acting was amazing
but you thought I was possessed!
Didn't you guys see amazing acting?!
What are you doing?!
You fall asleep when I give lesson
Sorry Mr. Marco
It's you again!
Come here!
This statue doesn't look real...too clean
I didn't sleep well last night.
I didn't mean to fall asleep
Get down on the ground!
Stay still!
Way too clean...need retouching!
You need to look more realistic!
Dirts enhance texture
It's way too clean
Forget it...don't use this statue!
Everyone...back to work!
Hurry up!
How've you been? Alright?
Pretty good, Mum. Everything's fine
That's good
Remember to be humble and learn from others
I know...I get it
Dad and I are worried that you're being bullied
Don't worry
Everyone likes me here...really
That's good to know
Oh, Mum...
ls Dad still mad at me?
Your Dad got a headache and just resting now
Please tell Dad that...
I love you both
What did you say?
Say that again, louder
Damn you! Get lost!
This make-up room is for actors,
not for extras!
Isn't she sweet?
Damn you!
Isn't that sweet?
Are you okay?
Please, stop asking me if I'm okay
Your face...This is too much!
Stop! Don't make things more difficult for me
I need money and I need this job!
Why didn't you say so? Money is all I have
How much do you need? I can give it to you
Stop joking around with me!
You are just like them!
Can't you see I've reached rock bottom?
I just want to help
If you really want to help...
just leave me alone!
I am sorry
Wish I could fly a rocket, fly you to the skies
Live together in outer space
Live for a thousand years
and be blissful everyday
Having you by my side is endless fun
Being together with you is my pride and joy
Fear not of the end of the world
When storm comes, as long as I see you
It is like a thousand miles of sunshine
Having you around is joyful
and make everything marvelous
Even plain water taste sweet
Longing to be with you forever,
I need you every minute
You are sunlight. You are my breath
Dressing up for you, feeling crazy for you
Be a fool for you
Scream like crazy is joyful too
Having you by my side is endless fun
If I lose you one day, blossoms would feel sad
I would desert the world to live on an island
Carve a figure of wood in the memory of you
Live alone with the figure of you
Having you around is joyful
and make everything marvelous
Even plain water taste sweet
Longing to be with you forever,
I need you every minute
You are sunlight. You are my breath
Mr. Marco, this is the first shot
of the entire movie
You ate a poisonous banana and
turned into a man
I want you to show more deep inner fear
Or this movie is doomed
Not like this...
I want true fear
Show me
Try expressing it with your eyes
What are you doing?
Do it again
Truly feel it...
If you keep doing this...the movie's doomed!
Do it again
For's really...
Forget it. Take a break
Get lost!
How did it feel?
It's hard to say
We're all just making a living here
Let's not give each other a hard time
Why so serious?
Show him to the restroom,
Clean him up
Mr. Marco
Did you see the news?
No, what's up. Quick!
Do you remember the extra you were yelling at?
She's dead
How did she die?
She hung herself
She wore a red dress to show her deep vengeance
Look! What's she doing there?!
I don't see anyone
That person in red...standing by the wall
Can't you see her?
Mr. Marco, stop joking
Get a close-up of him looking scared!
Got it
Director, why am I looking at the wall?
It's not a wall. It's an ocean
You're ice-skating and
you see your crush, Mr. Marco
You dare not to look at him...
so you steal a glance
Then hide behind the wall and
steal another glance. Got it?
Got it
Now you gather your courage
Give him your necklace and smile
This is for you...
Great! Cut!
Perfect! Beautiful!
Director, this...
He peed his pants...
Never mind...hold on
Sorry Mr. Marco. Please don't be angry
That was the expression I needed
That's awesome. Let's continue!
I'm not doing it!
I need to go to the hospital...
Damn you!
You will hear from my lawyer
Sorry, Mr. Marco
I just wanted a better performance
You could've just told me how!
I'm a world-class actor. I can do anything
I kept asking and you kept failing
So you came up with this evil plan?
Attention! Attention everyone!
Mr. Marco pissed his pants!
What did you just say?
Attention everyone!
Mr. Marco did not piss his pants
They're just wet
I've had enough of you!
I've been in the movie business for decades
I've never been so humiliated in my life!
How is it possible for an extra...
to humiliate a world-renowned star?
What the hell!
It's total nonsense!
How dare you stand there still?
I am sorry
No, you stay!
You go!
Yes. You should go!
I meant you, Marco. Leave!
You, young people these days...
ls so inexperienced and come up with this crap
I get it
I totally understand
I had to do this because your acting sucks
My acting sucks? Why did you hire me
in the first place?!
Because you were cheap and
everyone else was busy
You've been a total has-been for years
Thought you would have cherished this chance
You're a failure because
you don't have what it takes to be an actor
Let's not waste more time. Sun's coming up
Everyone, get ready. Let's roll again
One more time, everybody!
Don't worry about it. We're replacing you!
Don't be a prick. I'm trying to be nice here
You're the prick here!
We should talk
Get back to work. Come on
I appreciate the chance. I'm really gratefuI
I think about repaying you even in my dreams
How about giving back my script?
Please don't do this!
I haven't worked for seven, eight years!
I can't lose this job!
Please give me another chance!
I'll give you half my acting fee
Do me this favor
I can't
Take back the script from him
Excuse me
Please don't!
Let go!
- Give me some face, please...
- Let go!
Let go!
I'm so sorry
I didn't mean to scare you
Don't say a word!
I didn't know it would turn out that way
I don't need anyone's sympathy
Coming here make me feel like fighting
You weren't fighting...
you were just beating yourself up
Haven't seen you for a while.
So you're still acting
Hey, I'm taller than you.
You've got sagging skin
Dad. Mum
She's our daughter
- Come
- What are you doing here?
Let's take a selfie
Please Stop!
Don't worry...
Come on, let's pose together!
- What pose?
- Show me the 'heart' pose
Come a good boy
Smile! One, two, three!
Sorry to bother you, Mr. Marco
When my daughter was a kid...
She saw your movie "Orphan Adventure" and
fell in love with acting
You're her inspiration
Mum, please stop
Mr. Marco. Please don't mind us
We're big fans of yours
Mr. Marco
My daughter won't listen to me
But she's just not cut out for this
Can you help me talk her out of it?
She works very hard
She'll make it
Thank you Mr. Marco!
Nice suit!
It's okay
Whose fancy car? $200,000 enough?
I can give you more if you need it
Stop messing around!
Using prop money will get you arrested
Time's up. We have to go
In a minute...I'm almost done
Dreamy, just take it
No, I can't
I found a part-time job. I have enough money
That's good then
So you're actually rich
It's from my family business
Why did you even become an extra?
I really enjoy it
But I need to go abroad for my family business
I can't fool around anymore
That's so amazing!
Not really. I've got to go
By the way...
I want to tell you I like you
Well, I like you too
No, I mean in a romantic kind of way
I thought of you as a friend...
but you wanted something more?
What do you like about me?
You've got a beautiful soul
So you're saying I'm ugly on the outside?
No, you look beautiful too
That's so fake! Imagination
Come on. Try again with more feeling
You're really good-looking!
Just forget it
I don't blame you.
The lines are a bit of a stretch
How dare you!
I've got a boyfriend already
I know
But thank you anyways
I'll be going then
Come and visit me sometimes
I'll be in America.
Might not be able to come back for a while
You're a big-shot now! I'm so envious
I should be the one that's envious
You get to do what you love
I'll be rooting for you
Your food's here
Please give me a five-star rating. Thank you
Try it on
It's been a are you?
You know her?
Director Chen!
It's really you! What an honor to meet you!
I'm a big fan of your movies. I love your work
Try this one
Actually, I'm an actor. My name's Dreamy
Can you give me a chance to act in your movie?
I'm willing to play any roles
That's wonderful!
If you give me a chance...
I won't let you down!
That's good
Thank you!
I'll get going
Pardon me
Director, please have a look at this
Director, when will the movie start shooting?
I want to clear my schedule for you...
Do you know her well?
Not really
We'll call you
You can go now, thank you
I'm sorry, but...
May I have your WeChat?
I can come anytime to audition
We don't use WeChat. Why are you still here?
Oh okay
Can I borrow a pen? I'll just leave my number
- The Director can reach me anytime
- Just go!
Thank you so much
I won't be calling you
Just go
Thought you said you'll call me?
Hold on!
I was only being polite.
Didn't want to hurt your feelings
Have you never looked in the mirror?
I look at it everyday
You actually think you have a chance?
I do
No, you don't!
I know the chances are slim...
but I'm willing to wait
You don't need to wait!
You'll never get a chance....ever!
How long would 'ever' be?
Till the end of the universe!
Do you understand?
Well...what about after the universe ends?
People like that are a disgrace to humanity
They'll never make it
but yet they're in denial!
These people never know when to quit!
We just want your food!
Aren't you here to deliver our meals?!
Sorry Director,
Sorry everyone for the disruption
I'll lead her out
Let's go
What are you doing?
You're making a fool of yourself!
I had to try
Forget about it. It's fate!
Do you know what fate is?
What is it?
I never wanted to be a star, but here I am
You've always wanted to be a star,
but you're only an extra
This is fate!
Don't fight it, okay?
Charlie, where are you?
I'm with a client
I want to see you
I still have a meeting later. I'm really busy!
I'll call you later
Wait, don't hang up
What's up?
What are you wearing today?
I wear the same thing everyday
White shirt and black pants
Why are you asking?
Oh nothing...just curious
I'll talk to you soon. Bye bye
Let's take a taxi
Where can we find taxi?
Right over there
It's raining hard
Hi Cousin...what a coincidence!
Darling, she's my cousin. Wait here
Who's she?
A client
Why did you call me your cousin?
Don't worry about it! It's just a label!
Let me talk to her
She's really my client and
you're my client too!
I provide service...okay?
What service?
You know
Boyfriend for hire
You're an escort?'s just a label
Why me?
ls this my fate?
Or because I'm stupid?
Don't be so hard on yourself
Ignorance is a bliss, makes you happier!
Give me back my wedding fund
About that money...
I'll take good care of it. Don't worry
The money you are after...
It's all here
Take it. Just do whatever you want
I'm not scamming you
I'm just collecting my service fee
You can't just dine and dash, right?
You never thought
I would make it as an actor, right?
You'll make it
You're the best
As long as you pay me,
I'll keep telling you this...
As often as you want
Don't cry! She'll get suspicious!
Stop it!
Don't give me any trouble!
Why did you do this?
Don't screw it up for me!
Cousin! Don't take drugs!
It'll kill you!
Don't ask me for money anymore!
It's never too late to turn it around, Cousin!
You did the right thing
Don't lend her any money
She'll use it to buy drugs!
Are you okay?
Did you fall asleep? Were you drunk?
Are you trying to kill yourself?
Of course not
Are you making a movie? Are you an actor?
I'm not an actor
I'm awake now
Falling asleep while driving is very dangerous
Don't do this again!
Mr. Marco! Haven't seen you for a while
What's your role?
A dying courageous soldier
Just lie down over there!
Costumes...make-up...get ready!
Over here right?
Heads, stick closer!
It's getting dark, hurry up
Should I open my eyesor keep them closed?
Who cares!
Then I'll die with open eyes
After all, this battle is
a glorious sacrifice to avenge the nation
Dying with regret. I should...
Don't move!
Protect the General!
I cover you
Look at this! What the hell!
Where did you get that?
Tencent WeeSee...
Check this out
So scared he peed his pants!
Marco is ridiculous!
Do you know Marco?
No, I don't
He did wet his pants!
I've watched this many times
Can't stop laughing everytime I watch this
Didn't know he makes comedy
This clip is hilarious
- Are you Marco?
- ls it really him?
Looks like him
ls it real?
- Yes, it's Marco!
- It's really Marco!
He looks better in person
Can you take a picture with me?
- I like you!
- Let's selfie
Look here
No rush...
No rush, let's do it together
Your clip was so funny! I love it so much!
(Record-breaking views: Marco is back!)
(Has-been child celebrity breaks
internet record with peeing video!)
(Wetting your pants to success!
Marco shocked over unexpected fame!)
(Brands fighting over new star -
Marco endorses baby nappies)
(Marco mad at Pee meme.
I'm not the God of Pee!)
Mr. Marco. We're so glad to have you today
Can you tell us how you made your comeback?
What 'comeback'?
You're red-hot once again
What red-hot once again?
Was I dead and gone?
I didn't mean it that way
No, what did you mean by 'comeback'?
Are you trying to insult me?
That was really good!
Of course!
Mr. Marco is absolutely brilliant,
emotions come out anytime!
Sure, when my emotions explode, I can't stop it
Can you show us the 'peeing-the-pants' look?
So many children will be watching...
Let's not do that
You're right. Please tell us
what's next for you
What else? Just some international blockbuster
I've met Marco. This is the video of
me scaring him to pee himself
You're an actor too?
Yes, I used to be an actor
Have you met Bruce Lee?
Of course, I've met them all
Stop chatting! Get back to work!
There were so many ups and downs for you.
Tell us how you feel
I feel so blessed
Not everyone can experience these ups and downs
I am grateful to the person
who scared me in the video
I wouldn't be here today without her
Who is she?
I don't know her name...but...
She's an actor
Look who's here!
You look so good!
Mr. Marco!
Mr. Marco
Dreamy! I found you finally!
I came to thank you
She didn't do much. All she did was scare you
My hair turned white
from the shock she brought me
I wouldn't thank her for that
Come sit down
It smells delicious
You're super popular now!
Thank you for your scary face!
You have an amazing daughter
You are so mean
She looks like her Dad
No, like her Mum
She looks like her Dad
She looks like both of you
Also, I want to say congratulations!
You're shortlisted for Stephen Chow's movie
You didn't know?
They're casting
some new actors with real talent
I saw your name on the list
Where did you see it?
It's tomorrow in Beijing. See, right here!
- What happened to the internet?
- Sorry...
Anyways, I'm not going
Why not?
I have a new job now
I don't want to be an actor anymore
I'm a waitress now
Also, I've opened an online shop and
making a decent living
Dad and Mum are very content
Dreamy finally came to her senses. That's good!
Soup for Marco...
Very good
What's the matter?
I'm not feeling okay
ls it menopause?
Nonsense! He's way too young!
ls it a heart attack?
- Quick, call for an ambulance!
- No need. I'm okay
- Does your family know?
- It's okay. I'm fine
I can't watch Dreamy waste her life
as a 'happy' waitress
It's just not right
Don't get me wrong
What I mean is...
It's like an undefeatable boxer...
Giving up before the match even starts
I didn't give up. I finally understood
I don't fantasize about being a star anymore
You're giving up!
Mr. Marco
It's been more than a decade already
I've been ridiculed and rejected every day
Nobody wants to see me act
I've never got a single moment of respect
I've had enough!
What do you mean by 'why'?
Why give up?
I'm not giving up!
It's just...
It's just that I'm not cut out for it!
Hard work doesn't always pay off!
I told you so! But you insisted!
Let her be. She was bullied all the time
I know, I get it
I totally understand...
I came all this way just to show my gratitude
Now, I've got to go
Leaving so soon?
Mr. Marco, stay for dinner!
Please stay!
I thought that...
Not giving what success is all about!
You had taught me that
Maybe I should give it a try...
I knew it! You just won't let it go!
You useless bum!
Then go!
Book her a ticket!
Train or plane?
- Plane!
- Plane
First class!
Get out of here!
I don't need that much, Dad
Take it!
You're a total bum!
Got the tickets! Get going!
First class right?
Thank you Mum
Dad, you're the best!
Stupid kid! Don't ever come back!
Don't forget your keys!
Got it!
(Acting and movement)
I'm a robot
Ok, next
I'm a growing mushroom
Hurry up!
(Emotional control)
Grandpa. Grandma
Uncle. Cousin
Help me please!
My whole family's dead!
Fantastic! Next
Okay, next!
Sorry...I need five minutes to warm up
There're over a hundred people waiting!
(Talent showcase)
Thank you
That's very good. Next
I can make sounds with my hands
I'm sorry
This is a talent showcase!
I will play a hero
Alright. Begin
I, Chen Zhen will take revenge!
Who killed my Master?!
I will play a spy
Get started
Boss, don't...
Aren't we supposed to be playing mahjong?
What are you doing? It hurts!
No belt please
Hurry up
I play a con-man
Go ahead
Hurry up! Still over
a hundred people is waiting!
Darling, she's my cousin. Wait here
Who's she?
A client
Why did you call me your cousin?
Whatever! It's just a label!
Let me talk to her
She's really my client! You're my client too!
I provide service...Okay?
What service?
You know...that kind of service
Boyfriend for hire
You're an escort?!
Whatever! It's just a label!
Why me?
Am I just stupid?
Don't be so hard on yourself
Ignorance is a bliss, makes you happier!
Take it. Just do whatever you want
I'm just collecting my service fee
And also...
You can't just dine and dash, right?
You never thought I would make it as an actor
Sure, you can make it. You're the very best
As long as you pay me,
I'll keep telling you this
As often as you wish
Don't cry! She'll get suspicious!
Don't screw it up for me!
Cousin, quit doing drugs!
It'll kill you!
Never too late to
turn your life around, Cousin!
Thank you
Why did you hit me?
I'm not the cousin!
Sorry, I didn't mean to!
Can you switch and play the victim?
You're an escort?!'s just a label!
Why are you an escort?
Don't cry!
She'll get suspicious!
You look like a retard.
How could you be an escort?
Whatever you say, don't say I'm a retard!
That's not true
The truth hurts, right?
You must be seen as a retard since little
So now you scam people to prove yourself
Bullshit! Everyone loves me since I'm a kid!
They don't love you. They just pity you
Shut up!
You shut up!
Someone like you...doesn't deserve love
You lowlife!
You retard!
I'm going to kill you!
Why me again?!
I'm so sorry!
I really didn't mean to hurt you!
Alright! Enough! Next!
So sorry!
That way!
You made it to the next level!
(A year later)
Hey, what are you doing?
We are looking for our daughter!
Go to the police station! Not here
- That way please
- Thank you
That way
This song brings out
all kinds of emotions for me
Trust everyone here feels the same way
- Over there
- Okay, let's continue with the awards
The competition for Best Actress
this year is intense
For our nominees...
Are from all generations...
in the industry
Who will get the award?
But first...
Let's look at some footage
from before they became famous
Jelly was quite pretty before
Who's that?
That's Dreamy!
Please welcome our award presenters on stage
It's an honor tonight to give out this award
The Best Actress goes to...
This actress is really 'one-of-a-kind'
from the beginning...
to the end of the universe
Just cut the crap!
Life is...
But a dream!
You did it!
It's alright
Hello, Dreamy!
I'm a fan of yours!
I love all your movies!
Thank you
I'm an actor too. Do you think I can make it?
Do you really love acting?
I was born to act. Will I make it?
No, you won't
Even to the end of the universe...not a chance!
Do you understand?
I get it
So what are you going to do?
I'll go back to be a farmer
Of course not!
Don't let people tell you what to do
Keep working hard
You can make it
I get it. Thank you!