The Siege of Robin Hood (2022) Movie Script

[Hammer tapping]
[Dramatic music builds]
[Soldiers grunting]
[Man calling out]
[Dramatic music playing]
- [Soldier] Oi! Stop! Stop!
[Upbeat dramatic music]
[Grunting and gasping]
[Indistinct shouting]
[Soft wailing]
-This way. You three go east.
Hello. Oh my...
Round the side. Move.
Get out of the way, scum.
How dare you?
[Grunting and groaning]
Same time next week, gents?
You took my money.
Oi you, come back here.
Where is he?
Get out of the way. Move it.
[Slow dramatic music]
[Wind whistling]
[Chickens clucking]
Quick, round the side! Quick!
[Indistinct conversations]
[Pig snorting]
[Flies buzzing]
[Dramatic music]
[Indistinct talking]
[Lively music]
[Soft wailing]
[Crowd murmuring]
[Sniffs] Eugh!
[Metal clanging]
[Cheers and laughter]
[Grunting and yelling]
[Soldier] He stinks!
[Gagging and retching]
[Indistinct muttering]
Now, let's try the sword.
[Swishing metal]
[Crying and wailing]
[Crying and wailing]
[Regal music playing]
[Hurried breathing]
[Curious music]
[Soldier] Oi! Stop! Stop!
Go get him!
[Dramatic music building]
[Metal clanging]
[Metal clanking]
[Dramatic music builds]
[Soldiers groaning
and murmuring]
[Soldier grunting]
[Dramatic music playing]
[Horse neighing]
[Horse snorting]
Hey! Looking for something?
Money well spent, thank you.
Thank you.
- What's your name?
- Robin Hood.
He's getting away.
Quick, stop him!
[Robin] Ya, ya.
[Soldiers grunting and groaning]
[Bell tolling]
[Regal music playing]
Here we are, girl.
Home sweet home.
Good girl.
[Soft music playing]
Hello, little sister.
[Horse neighing]
Is that what I think it is?
You brought that animal
back here,
you'll lead them
straight to us.
It'll be fine.
We'll leave it out the back.
I need a new horse anyway.
[Horse neighing]
Hurry up, we're running late.
For what?
To give away all our food?
Why must we give away
What little we have
to those that we don't
even know?
It wasn't even ours
in the first place.
Yeah, but it's very hard
to steal.
Not everyone can do
as they please, Robin!
If nobody else helps them,
who shall?
Certainly, not our queen
or the sheriff.
Stop your whining.
We'll be down at the camp soon.
It's Just down the valley.
But I'm hungry now.
Don't worry, they'll be prepping
something nice for dinner.
Think about what we can get
from this beast
when we turn him into
the slavers tomorrow.
Will Big John be getting fed
Don't you think you've had
Taking the Kings mead
is why you're in here.
Still thinking
with your stomach.
In the fighting pits, you won't
get fed unless you win.
I'll win.
Don't you worry about that.
Think you're going to be
'Little' John soon.
[Birds chirping]
There you go, buddy.
[Soft music]
There you go, that's it.
Oh my god!
That's all I have.
It's cool, isn't it?
What is it?
It's called a trebuchet.
It's a siege engine.
There's hundreds of them around
Sherwood Forest.
They're all leftover
from the Great War.
Guards! Guards!
[Footsteps marching]
[Wagon rumbling and squeaking]
[Tense music]
Robin did you see that?
That was barbaric.
You have to do something.
It's not our war, Lillian.
You're just going to let him
go to his death?
No, I'm gonna follow him.
There must be a prison outpost
near here.
Probably just down on
the river flats.
They'll have food, wine,
maybe gold - everything we need.
I'm gonna go investigate.
Wait here.
Let me come with you.
No, no, it's far too dangerous.
Stay here. By the time you count
to 100, I'll be back, I promise.
Just wait here.
I'll be back.
Count to a hundred!
Here we are, boys.
Look what we got.
Nice big beast to sell
to the slavers tomorrow.
Fetch a good price,
won't you beast?
Let me out and you'll see.
What have you got for us, boys?
Oi! Let us out of here.
[Jug smashing]
What was that?
There you are.
I was looking to catch your
Were you?
You've got a pretty face,
you know?
I could be of better service
out of this cage than in it.
Could you?
And what sort of service
are we talking?
[Woman] Ever seen up a lady's
skirts, boy?
Boy, look what I found.
Something's wrong.
[Man] Ah, look what we have
[All screaming]
[Intrepid music playing]
Faster! Quick, I need to save
my brother.
Just over the hill.
Slightly to the right.
[All screaming]
[Robin] Move. Be free. Run.
[Intrepid music playing]
[Dramatic music building]
Well that's gonna raise
the bounty on my head.
[Tense music]
[Shouting and screaming]
[Dramatic music building]
- [Narrator] Throughout
the kingdom,
the Sheriff of Nottingham's men
inflicted brutal
and uncompromising rule
upon the people.
Hunting was outlawed,
livestock was confiscated
and winter stores stolen.
- [Man] Take it all.
[Dramatic music]
[Dramatic music continuing]
[Dramatic music continuing]
[Eerie horn notes playing]
[Harp playing]
[Birds chirping]
That's it?!
Your penchant for Chinese
guards is rather expensive.
I like them.
They don't talk back.
I summoned you here
because we need more gold.
I shall have to raise
the taxes.
No, no. No more taxes.
People don't like taxes.
It makes them unhappy and I
can't stand unhappy people.
So miserable.
Moping around with long faces.
No taxes?
Excellent idea, your majesty.
We shall fill the royal coffers
by selling air.
Oh, can we do that?
Your highness, I don't know why
you put up with this...
impertinent sellsword.
Because he's efficient.
He gets things done.
If he is so efficient, why are
we always running out of money?
Because you scroungers
keep wasting all my money.
[Soft harp plays]
Looks like Mr Efficiency
needs to do his job
and get us some gold.
- His skills lie elsewhere.
- Really?
I would love to know where.
[Tense music building]
- Kill him.
- With pleasure.
Sheriff, would you be so kind?
Huh? But your majesty.
Oh! [Laughing]
Very efficient.
Now, get me some more money.
[Lively music in distance]
[Lively music]
Cedric, my old friend,
how are you?
Hey! There he is.
I heard they almost caught you.
Well, almost counts for nothing.
Anyone that can outrun
a platoon of royal guards
is alright in my book.
I think you've earned yourself
a drink.
- I think I have, too.
- Three pints of ale.
No. Two.
You're not drinking.
When are you gonna stop
treating me like a child?
When you're not a child.
You know what?
Little baby cup
for my little baby sister.
That's disgusting!
I'm going home.
See you two codgers later.
She's gonna be trouble
that one.
She sure is.
Runs in the family, though.
[Birds chirping]
[Horses neighing]
[Tense music building]
How can I help you?
Well, you can help us
in many ways, sweetheart.
Tell me, do you know
the penalty
for hunting in the
royal forest?
I do, but I'm no hunter.
Well, we've tracked
a well-known thief
to this location.
[Clearing throat]
Where did he come from then?
You wouldn't know anything
about that would you?
Where's Robin Hood?
I have no idea
who you're talking about.
Don't feign innocence with us,
We know who you are.
You and your thieving brother.
Thieving? You're the only thief
around here.
Your taxes and hunting
are bleeding the people dry
and starving them to death.
What you must understand,
little girl,
is that people like
your brother
are costly to deal with.
Because of him,
I've had to upgrade my guards.
Do you know the cost to hire
Asiatic mercenaries?
Trust me when I say,
when I catch him...
he will hang!
You are hereby arrested for
poaching in the royal forest
and holding stolen goods for
which the penalty is death.
[Tense music building]
[Men laughing]
- [Sheriff] Go round the back,
make sure she doesn't escape.
[Gasping and whimpering]
[Coughing and gagging]
My brother will hear about
I'm counting on it!
Do what you want with her.
[Single drumbeat]
[Crow cawing]
[Water trickling]
[Mournful music playing]
Lillian? Lillian!
[Sobbing] Lillian.
[Mournful music playing]
[Mournful music continuing]
[Angelic music playing]
[Bell tolling]
[Heraldic fanfare playing]
- Wonderful.
- It is.
Wonderful moment.
Squire, help me with this
armour would you? It's jammed.
We'll have to get you
a new one.
It's fine. Thank you.
[Heraldic fanfare continuing]
[Crowd chattering]
And the weather is beautiful,
the crowds are here.
Wonderful celebration.
It's a great idea of mine.
- [Herald] My lords...
- Oh.
My lords and ladies
and good gentle folk all.
We do so heartily welcome you
to the tournament arena
for the Queen's royal joust!
Introducing our first
Bearing the standard
of crimson red,
we call forth Sir Simon!
[Crowd booing]
Good luck to you.
Now, my lords and ladies,
now, now.
For it is my time to introduce
to you our most beloved,
our favourite,
our reigning champion,
the one, the only, Sir Lancelot!
Ah, wonderful.
[Heraldic fanfare playing]
He's going to win this,
hands down.
[Lancelot] Ya.
[Horse neighing]
[Tense music building]
Oh! No.
[Herald] A beautiful pass my
lords and ladies.
A fine pass but, alas,
no dismount.
[Crowd booing]
At last our knights
shall take their place
at the end of the list
to commence a second pass.
[Dramatic music builds]
Ah! [Laughing]
Yes, my lords and ladies,
a fine shattering of the lance
bringing Sir Lancelot equally
tied with Sir Simon.
Oh, I knew, he'd do it. Yes!
- [Lancelot] Yes!
[Horse neighing]
- Go on!
[Tense music playing]
Damn it.
This one's for the queen!
- [Herald] Lancelot has broken
even against Sir Simon.
What say you?
- Fabulous.
- Yes it is.
- I knew he'd do it.
- Very good.
- [Herald] My lords and ladies.
this shall be our final pass.
Who's cheering on Sir Simon?
[Crowd booing]
Well, my lords and ladies,
who's cheering on Lancelot?
[Heraldic fanfare playing]
[Indistinct shouting]
[Dramatic music building]
[Angelic music playing]
[Solemn string music playing]
She was an innocent, Cedric.
The things they did to her.
My lad, she was an angel,
We all share your pain.
Yeah, then why is nobody
doing anything about it?
Well, what would you have us
do, uh?
Storm the castle with
our pitchforks?
Yeah, if that's what it takes.
We're just poor villagers.
This sheriff
has an army of guards,
knights, soldiers with weapons
that we can't hope to match.
So we're just meant to take it?
We're just meant to get stabbed
and killed and raped
and the men should just tax us
within an inch of our lives.
It's not what I'm saying.
No, this is bullshit.
Heads up. Sheriff's guards
are heading this way.
Word is they're looking
for you.
We're looking for
Robin of Loxley.
You wanna rob a locksmith?
Any man woman or child
harbouring a fugitive
will be severely punished.
anyone with information
leading him to us...
will be swiftly and generously
[Soft tense music playing]
No takers?
Well, if you do see him,
you know where to find us.
[Tense music continuing]
To hell with it,
I'll do it myself.
Robin, don't. It's suicide.
[Crowd shouting]
My lords, my ladies
and good gentle common folk.
After such a fine display
of courage, honour,
chivalry and skill...
it is my absolute honour
to present to you your champion,
Sir Lancelot!
Sir Simon. On your knees.
[Solemn music playing]
On your knees!
Finish him off.
Lancelot! Finish him off!
Your majesty,
this is but a tournament.
The rules of a tournament state
that if...
- Sheriff.
- [Clearing throat]
[Tense music building]
What is this?
What is the meaning of this?
Knight's code clearly states
that he shall not be punished
for anything that - you stop!
No! No, no, no, no.
What are you doing?
No, no, stop! Stop!
[Crowd gasping]
[Gasping and laughing]
This is an outrage!
I thought it was rather funny.
Have you no honour?
You animal.
[Mock kissing]
Take him away.
In the eyes of God,
this is wrong!
The people... No!
No! No!
[Maniacal laughing]
[Maniacal laughing]
[Wind blowing]
[Bird chirping]
[Soft solemn music playing]
[Bell tolling]
[Mysterious music building]
Hello Robin.
How's your noggin'?
I've felt better, but I'll live.
I can fix you a tonic.
Water would be great.
Water? You know fish
fornicate in it?
If you need a refreshing
there's mead in yonder barrel.
Thank you.
So, why did you stop me?
Do I need a reason?
Perhaps it was just a moment
of human kindness.
[Retching] Eugh!
One man reaching out
to another.
We all know who you are, Merlin.
What you are.
And what might that be?
A lecherous old goat,
a scamster,
somebody that doesn't help
anyone unless he's well paid.
- Oh, that's a bit harsh.
- That's a bit generous.
Well, you're right
and you're wrong.
Shouldn't have expected
a straight answer from you.
Well, you're right if you think
the sheriff is dangerous,
capricious, malicious,
very unpleasant
and must be stopped.
But you're wrong if you think
you can do it by yourself.
You heard the villagers,
they don't want any part
of this, Merlin.
It's not to them
you have to look, Robin.
You have a gift young man,
an incredible skill
with a bow.
It's almost magical.
Look to others who carry
skills, who have integrity,
who have that fire in the belly
that you have,
then you'll be unstoppable.
You heard the sheriff,
he has an army.
He has Lancelot by his side,
red-crested mercenaries
work for him.
Even if I could find
these so-called allies
that you speak of,
they're not going to help,
it simply wouldn't be enough.
You do your part Robin...
I'll do mine.
That is an impressive trick.
There is one condition,
[Soft eerie music playing]
[Bird screeching]
[Dramatic music building]
You must find a symbol.
Something that people
can rally behind.
That strikes fear
into the enemy.
Fight with honour.
Fight with valour.
You may fail.
You may fall.
But the quest for justice
is eternal.
The fire will spread
and your people will complete
your quest.
The hot coals of rebellion
will smoulder
and ignite in fury.
For those with fired fields
and stolen stores,
empty stomachs
and heavy hearts.
for the downtrodden, the weary,
the weak...
For your sister, Robin,
you must rise and become the
hero you were destined to be.
[Bell tolling]
[Crying out]
[Metal screeching]
[Crying out]
[Tense music building]
are you still considering
your loyalties?
My loyalties...
are to God and the people.
I've accepted my fate.
I'm ready to die.
[Dog barking]
Oh, we're not going to
kill you.
Your fate is much worse
than death.
[Chains rattling and clanking]
Move, dog! Move!
By order of
the Queen of Nottingham...
you are now banished.
Thank you for the armour.
Get this shit outta here.
Blast these fish!
[Curious music playing]
I know you.
Yes, I freed you.
Damn well nearly
blew my head off!
You're welcome.
"You're welcome" you say?
I'm looking for a sellsword.
Well, I don't own one.
[Chuckling] Means hired muscle.
When we take the castle,
if you help us,
you can have everything
in the royal food stores.
All the food and wine
that your heart desires.
What say you?
All the food wine I desire
you say?
I tell you what, one condition,
as long as I'm never sober
along this journey,
I will join you.
You got yourself a deal.
Well, lead the way then, boy.
[Metal clanging]
This is the place.
Tell the sheriff,
I don't have his gold.
Just come back another time.
We don't want gold,
we're told you're the man
to get us weapons?
[Coin clinking]
Are you licenced?
What licence?
I'm only licenced to sell
weaponry to the Queen's guard
and those sent directly by
the sheriff.
Fuck the sheriff!
[Locks unlatching]
[Hinges creaking]
Don't touch!
There's not much of a selection
in here is there?
Ooh, it speaks!
I speak and I'll wring
your scrawny neck too
if you don't help us out.
What sort of weapon is this?
Far superior
to your English steel.
And what is wrong with
an English bow?
Absolutely nothing.
It's good for hunters.
And women -
do not touch anything!
How much for the bow?
25 pieces.
25 pieces?
I hear you have some sort of
problem with the sheriff
for some sort of debt?
Few gambling debts.
Trivial amount of few hundred
pieces of silver.
Doesn't sound trivial to me.
Look, payment from you
gentlemen should keep him
and the collectors off my back
for a few days.
You do have the gold to pay,
What if I offered you something
greater than gold?
I'm quite certain you cannot.
What if I was to tell you
that we aim to kill
the Sheriff of Nottingham?
Then I would check to see what
herbs you have been smoking.
If we do, your debts
will be cancelled.
Listen, the sheriff killed
my sister.
He's slowly starving
the people of Nottingham.
We need to do something.
My comrades and I,
we've vowed to kill him
end this tyranny
once and for all.
These comrades, how many
of you are there?
Including you? Three.
Chances of succeeding are about
a million to one.
Why on Earth would I join you?
Why wouldn't you?
In the name of the sheriff,
open this door!
Let us in!
Three it is.
Back door this way.
Around the back!
[Lively music playing]
[Indistinct murmuring]
- Shame we had to kill her.
- Just following orders.
Besides, it was fun.
She was trying to get away...
I have to give her credit,
I mean, I've never seen someone
take that many wounds
to the stomach
and still survive that long.
I mean, where was her brother?
He was in hiding.
It would have been us
at the other end of that sword
if we didn't recover
that horse.
Better her than us, especially
after what you did to her.
- Oh she was nice.
- You're an animal.
[All chuckling]
[Sighing] Well...
all's well, that ends well.
[Background chattering]
[Tense music building]
[Music stopping]
[Flames crackling]
Shame about that Loxley sprat,
she'd have made a good wife
in a couple of years.
Bit young.
Yeah, especially with a nice
piece of noble arse like that.
Do you hear something?
Nup. [Grunts]
I'm going to make you pay
like she did.
My sister deserved better.
Robin of Loxley... No, no, no.
No, Robin,
please don't hurt me.
Not me. It wasn't. It was him!
No, no, no. Loxley, Loxley...
It wasn't me.
I did nothing to your sister.
I promise.
It was the sheriff
that stabbed her.
And you decided to violate
her dying body.
You're a dead man!
The sheriff's gonna hear about
Maybe so, but not from you.
So where's Robin?
I thought he was with you?
He was definitely not with me.
And where have you been?
What have you done?
Nothing that they didn't
And who they?
Found the guards
who took my sister.
You'll be a wanted man
after tonight.
No more than I already was.
Why didn't you wait for us?
Another drink lads?
Think it'd be wise
if you leave the whole barrel!
If I hadn't of...
taken the horse.
It's not your fault, squire.
By order of the sheriff I order
you to lay down your weapons.
Sorry, I can't understand you?
By order of the sheriff,
I demand you lay down your
I think you looking for
other people, not us.
Robin of Loxley,
you're wanted for murder.
How did... Who did you kill?
Two of the sheriff's guards.
That is disgraceful.
Did you know about this?
He told me he was a tap dancer.
Lay down your weapons,
or we kill you all.
Gentlemen, let us settle this
Let us buy you a drink
and be on our way.
Step aside little boy.
We want Loxley.
Then I'm afraid you're gonna
have to go through me.
[Dramatic music building]
Did you know he could do that?
Played me.
[Dramatic music]
Whoa! [Laughing]
Look out, mate!
You stupid metal man!
Look out, Todd, behind you.
That guy can move!
He can move like the wind
this boy.
[Dramatic music playing]
Final warning.
[Blade whistling]
[Sinister music building]
[Crickets chirping]
Ah, curse this weather!
Ten-to-one I have a cold
by the morning.
When I was seven years old
we were trained as warriors
and sent into the wilderness
with just the shirts
on our backs.
Oh please, the north's not that
cold you big girl.
Are you insulting me?
Of course not.
I like girls.
Idiots! The fight's out there
not here.
the price on our heads
will have gone up tenfold
after tonight.
Perhaps it'll encourage
people to join the cause.
Or it'll encourage every fool
out there with a sword
going for the bounties
on our head.
What did I say that for?
You jinxed us.
Knew you were bad luck.
Who goes there?
- We invited no one to dinner.
- And the food's all gone.
I'm not here for your food.
I saw what you did
to the guards tonight.
I've come to join you.
Yeah right.
What are you gonna do?
Wash our clothes?
Besides, we already have
a girl.
We have no use for your skills
The three of you
are going to take down
the Sheriff of Nottingham
all by yourselves.
What concern of yours is that?
His guards killed
my entire family.
Well, we all have sad stories.
What can you contribute?
[Blade ringing]
It's not that impressive.
What else you got?
Right. She's in.
No, she's not in. You can't just
bribe your way in.
She is and she can.
So, shut up and eat up.
So sit down and tell us
your name.
My name is Freyda
and if by my sword and cunning
we can overthrow the sheriff,
we can restore the land
to its...
Yeah, yeah.
Enough of your fancy speeches.
As long as you keep
bringing food you're in.
Contributing more
than these two jesters.
[Soft solemn music]
So what now?
The sheriff will have
every guard within 20 miles
looking for us.
Yes, us.
You're telling me that if I can
knock that mead off your head,
you'll take my watch
for tonight?
You won't be hitting it off
my head, boy.
I Don't Wanna Hurt You.
Oh, you won't be hurting me
can tell you that right now.
Come on.
Oh my God,
you gotta be joking.
- Did he even hit me?
- I didn't see anything.
- Didn't even feel a thing.
- Give me another.
- Another go?
- Take another ten.
Shh! Can I concentrate?
I didn't even feel it.
- I didn't see it.
- One more.
Let's see what you've got.
Oh, you've gotta be joking.
My God.
Gotta be joking.
What about you arrow boy?
You want to have a go?
I mean, if you want to volunteer
your shift.
I'll take that.
Oh, we'll see about that.
You sure you're up for it?
- Are you ready are?
- Born Ready.
What about you lass?
A woman knows when to pick
her battles.
Yeah, she might break a nail.
You know what?
If you can take this
from my head,
I'll do your shift for a week.
Oh, now there's a challenge,
Unless you're scared?
[Quirky music playing]
Oh, she's getting up.
[Bones cracking]
I put my money on the girl.
- Yeah, me too.
- That's a bad bet.
Aye, I think the boy is going
to be going down, I think.
- I'll be fine.
- I don't think so.
[Bones cracking]
Yeah, you better warm up.
Go on, lass.
Don't want to pull you back.
That's bullshit.
- Oh...
- Good one. that's a woman
I'd go to war with.
[Eerie music playing]
[Dog barking]
[Bell tolling]
Your majesty,
I can't raise taxes again.
I am already the most hated man
in the land.
And that's my problem because?
I may have a creative solution
for you.
Show me.
A royal proclamation that will
solve all our money problems
by redistributing the wealth
to where it rightfully belongs.
Ooh! Where do I sign?
Here your majesty.
The queen has just issued
a royal proclamation
naming me king and has
tragically taken her own life.
But I...
We shall all mourn her loss.
[Tense music building]
Is there a problem with this?
No problems...
your majesty.
[Dramatic music building]
[Merlin] With the sheriff,
now king,
seated firmly on the throne,
any resistance
by the suffering people
was quickly and ruthlessly
[Dramatic music playing]
[Steel clashing]
[People yelling]
[Bell tolling]
[Water trickling]
[Birds chirping]
Robin! You sly fox.
You thought you'd sneak a look,
did you?
No, I was up here already.
I was sleeping.
I've heard you snore,
you weren't sleeping.
- Yes I was.
- You weren't.
You know, you could use a bath
If you're offering?
[Soft laughing]
[Branch cracking]
- You didn't see that, did you?
- No, but I heard it.
Well, I promise you it was
as graceful as it sounded.
It didn't sound graceful
at all.
[Soft music playing]
Are you sure you know
how to do this?
You're not doing it right.
I know how to bathe!
I'll have you know
I'm one of the cleanest men
in all of Nottingham.
I don't believe that
for a second.
Oh, yeah, I'll prove it to you.
There you go.
I'm not ready
for your tomfoolery.
What the hell, Freyda?
It's just a joke.
[Ominous music playing]
[Bird screeching]
Oh, hello uglies,
this is quite a surprise.
Bit of a turn up to be sure
and quite unexpected.
That we're back so soon?
No, Robin,
that you're back at all.
One beautiful girl,
a freak, a weirdo and a...
pet bear.
If you were starting a circus
I would say you're making
great progress.
What does everyone think
I'm his pet for?
Did you hear of the attack
on the sheriff's men?
Yes, I heard a whole legion
was wiped out
by a band of warrior princes.
Freyda, Tuck, Little John,
my warrior princes.
And all of you...
- Sworn fealty to Robin.
And we'll fight to the end
to defeat the sheriff,
or we'll die trying.
Oh, I do hope you don't die.
It would be...such a waste.
You said that if I brought in
allies, you would assist us
in killing the sheriff.
Here they are.
Will you honour that promise?
Hmm. It would be my pleasure.
[Lively music playing]
You're that Robin Hood!
[Music stopping]
We could get 50 silver pieces
if we turn him in.
Quickly, call the guards!
You can turn us in,
collect a very hefty bounty
and the sheriff will crush
what's left of you.
What crimes have we really
Defending people just like you?
How many of our family members
have to die
before we stand up
and do what's right?
How many of your own families
are starving to death
because you can no longer hunt
on your own land.
The same lands that your
ancestors died defending
over hundreds of years.
All is not lost.
We can defeat them together.
There is still hope.
[Solemn music playing]
I say we rise as free men and
women and we demand a change.
I say we rise
and we take back what's ours!
Who is with us?
And you'll all die.
And nothing will change.
- Who amongst you speaks?
- It's Lancelot.
The one and only.
Honourable knight of knights.
Once loved by all.
Still loved by all.
Still honourable in our eyes.
Why don't you help them?
Because it is futile.
The gates to the castle
are too heavily guarded.
Even if you did sneak your way
past the guards,
you will find yourselves
in a Labyrinth of corridors.
The way I see it,
unless you find yourselves
a guide
with another way
into the castle...
you're as good as dead.
[Lively music starting up]
[Water splashing]
[Coughing and spluttering]
Enough! Enough!
This is a waste of time.
He's just a washed-up has-been.
The sheriff will be
the castles defences...
to shore up his claim
on the throne.
You have to act immediately...
reinforcements will be
arriving from the Orient
by the new moon.
I ain't afraid of no Orientals.
Puny little Chinamen.
Don't underestimate
their power friend,
they fight in ways
you've never seen.
And what of this way
into the castle?
I will tell you what I know,
but you have to take me
with you.
You need me.
There's a weak point
on the south wing
and I know what it is.
All it needs is a little force.
Maybe a lot.
And why should we believe
in drunks such as yourself?
My word is all I have left.
[Thunder rumbling]
[Soft mournful music]
Hmm. Quite a fall.
I mean...these here.
This is quite a fall.
Not yours.
Did I bruise your ego?
Just needed to get away
from it all.
From me?
No. Everything.
You cheated anyway.
You know what they say?
All's fair in love and war.
[Soft music playing]
No, you said you weren't ready.
What are we fighting for
[Soft music continuing]
[Epic music building]
[Blade whistling]
[Soft music playing]
About tonight...
I'm worried.
- About?
- You.
Oh please, I'll be the one
worrying about you.
I can't afford to lose
anyone else.
Me either.
Come on.
We've got a castle to siege.
[Intrepid music playing]
- Come on!
[Tense music playing]
[Arrow whooshing
and man grunting]
[Tense music building]
There. The weak point.
Patched with mudstone.
Leads straight to the corridors
adjacent the Queen's chambers.
Lancelot, how was it that you
came to know of this passage?
Well, let's just say
there was a time
when I held the Queen's favour.
I'm sure you held more than
just her favour you sly dog.
[Merlin chuckling]
So we're going to blow this
thing up.
No, son...
we're going to melt it.
[Freyda gasps]
[Bubbling and hissing]
[Freyda laughs]
Will you be alongside us,
I'm afraid
this is where I leave you.
You see, Lancelot,
I am a lover nor fighter.
I'll see you all back at home
when she's all finished.
Good luck.
[Tense music playing]
Lift me up.
[Quirky music playing]
You can't be serious?
[Soldier] What do we do
with that market girl,
the one that helped Robin
get away?
[Sheriff] Do with her
as you wish.
Ah shit.
He's gone.
[Soldiers murmuring]
It's well cold isn't it?
It's well cold.
Think I prefer being
out in the grounds.
[Tense music building]
[Soldiers groaning]
Yeah, all the knights are gone.
Funny that.
I never saw Lancelot down
there, did I?
I never did.
I never saw Lancelot.
[Soldiers muttering]
[Soldiers gasping and yelling]
[Crying out]
- Come on.
- So, where do you s'pose
he went?
[Tense music]
This way.
[Tense music]
[Bow creaking]
[Armour clanging]
[Tense drumbeat]
[Softly] Where are you sheriff?
[Bow creaking]
Drop it.
[Tense music]
Enough waiting.
[All yelling]
[Thunder rumbling]
[Ringing metal]
[Sinister music playing]
[Soft warbling]
[Drumbeat intensifying]
[Hinges creaking]
[Foreboding music]
How thoughtful.
You decided to surrender
and save us a lot of time...
and effort.
She had her whole life
ahead of her.
Pity it was you
who caused her death.
- My lord.
[Wooden rattling]
[Splintering wood]
What is your wish?
A quick death?
My blade
plunging into your heart?
Or a slow death,
sliced and diced
like a choice piece of meat?
My wish is to cut out
your filthy tongue.
You can join me?
Be my chief archer.
Live in luxury in the castle
instead of a forest.
I'd rather die.
As you wish.
Goodbye, Robin.
Come on. Robin.
- Wait.
- We're gonna get you.
[Soldier] Intruders! Men!
- Robin!
Throw him in the dungeon,
we'll deal with him later.
Robin, run!
Come on.
There's too many,
we must retreat.
Hold him, men.
To the parapets!
We have to leave, now.
Intruders! Guards!
[Yelling and shouting]
Horses await by the treeline.
Make haste!
Move! Let's go!
What are you doing? Come on!
[Thunder rumbling]
I will hold them back.
Go! Go now!
[Hinges creaking]
[Water trickling]
[Mournful music playing]
[Mournful music continuing]
- Enough!
- Couple more.
The sheriff wants him alive for
his public hanging tomorrow.
[Mournful music continuing]
Throw him in number four.
He'll enjoy the company.
[Gate rattling]
[Lock rattling]
[Ghostly murmuring]
Are you alive friend?
Yes, barely.
How? Where are the others?
[Mournful music playing]
I stayed to hold back
the sheriff's guards
while they escaped.
That's very brave of you...
and honourable.
This is all my fault.
I should not have brought you
It was my fault.
I shouldn't have run off
like that.
In a few hours...
our last sunrise
will peak through these bars.
Where there is life,
there is still hope.
Hope left this godforsaken
kingdom long ago.
[Birds chirping]
Ah, friends, how did it go?
Not as you'd hoped,
I'm guessing.
[Sneering] Hello ugly.
Listen, I told you
any arrangement,
contractual business dealings
we may have had are now off.
Come now, as if you get to
I merely wanted to invite you
to my coronation ball.
I thought my own brother
should be there.
I have no brother.
And since you betrayed
everything we believed in,
I want no part of you
or your world.
And so you actively assist
the realm's enemies?
Your enemies.
Think of what we could achieve
with you by my side
as my advisor?
I'll admit, my methods
aren't always the most...
Let's not nit-pick.
With the throne
now in my hands,
we could build our kingdom
to rival that of Camelot.
Centuries from now, people will
say our names with...
Revulsion, horror, regret.
You always were a
disappointment to the family.
I am so going to miss these
little family chats of ours.
[Soft tolling]
[Dramatic music building]
Oh shit.
[Foreboding music playing]
[Soldier grunting]
- We'll take care of this.
- I'll find Robin.
[John growling]
[Metal clanging]
[Soldiers groaning]
[Soldier grunting then groaning]
[Deep breathing]
[Eerie crying
[Tense music playing]
[Soldier snoring]
[Tense music continuing]
Freyda! I'm sorry,
I saw the Sheriff.
Sh. Sh. Sh.
[Soldier snoring]
Psst, Lancelot,
wake up. Freyda's here.
[Tense music]
Freyda, on your right, look out!
[Soldier muttering]
Take your hands off her!
- Ah!
- Freyda, run!
Run for your life. Get out.
- Come on you little blondie.
Goodnight princess.
[Freyda crying out]
Fight! Take your hands off her!
Get off! Ah!
[Soldier] Grab her. Grab her
Taking you to the sheriff.
He'll know what to do with you.
Get off me!
I'm going to kill you!
Freyda! No!
Bring her back!
[Eerie horns wailing]
- The people rose
and the rebellion began.
[Epic music playing]
[Steel clashing]
[Both straining]
[Eerie horns wailing]
[Bell tolling]
[Ominous music plays]
I'm coming with you.
[Soldier] Move it, move it.
Let me take care of this lot.
- Good luck.
- Where are you going?
To get my armour back.
[Bone crunching]
Run you slimy dog!
Cowards. Time to send in
the real men. I'll go.
[Thumping and grunting]
[Thumping and grunting]
[Tense music playing]
Hey? Hey?
Did you spend that money,
Robin give you?
Thieving whore.
Hello, shiny knight.
You coward.
I came here to protect
the people.
Innocent people like her,
from vermin like you!
Ah, princess.
Now have two bitches!
- Ooh!
- Ah!
That was...pretty good.
[Grunting and yelling]
Go! Run!
She ain't going nowhere.
Neither are you!
[Bow creaking]
[Metal clanging]
[Men yelling]
[Bow creaking]
You have to finish this.
There's far too many.
Looks like a fair fight to me.
Godspeed brother.
[Soldier grunting]
[Swords whistling]
Drop it.
Drop it!
Drop it!
You know, she screamed
so much...
and she knew that it was
all your fault!
Now, you'll be responsible
for the deaths of two whores.
Freyda! No!
Die, bitch!
[Robin yelling]
[Grunting and straining]
[Soldier yelling]
[Soldier chuckling]
[Grunting and yelling]
[Lancelot grunting]
Not quick enough!
The armour...
[Lancelot groaning]
..looks better on me anyhow.
- I heard it's hard to move in.
- Hmm.
Not from me you worm.
No. No, no, no. I'm over here.
Not her.
Such a shame.
She was so pretty too.
[Robin groaning]
[Both straining]
[Metal ringing]
[Soldiers groaning]
[Soldiers yelling]
[Metal clanging]
[Both yelling and grunting]
[Metal clunking]
That elbow always jams!
Thieving bitch!
[Triumphant music playing]
Show us.
Show us!
Another friend once told me...
where there is life...
there is hope.
Just shut up!
Do you need a hand, boy?
[Yelling and grunting]
- John!
- Uh?
[Solemn music playing]
[Solemn music continuing]
[Soldier gurgling]
[Solemn music playing]
[Metal ringing]
[Robin gasping]
[Both straining]
[Robin grunting]
[Soldier gurgling]
[Bow creaking]
[Arrow whistling]
[Arrow whistling]
[Solemn music plays]
[Solemn music continuing]
[Soft groaning]
He was a great warrior.
He was an honourable man.
[Mournful music playing]
[Liquid sloshing]
[Mournful music continuing]
[Mournful music continuing]
[Arrow whistling]
[Crickets chirping]
[Solemn music playing]
[Cheering and applause]
My people! People...
My friends...
for far too long
the powers that be
have robbed us of our families,
our loved ones, and our wealth.
That era is now over.
[Cheering and applause]
A new dawn stands before us.
So many people have died
for us to have this freedom.
We would do well to remember
their sacrifice.
But this day...
this day is a day of joy.
This day is a day of victory!
This day we give the wealth
of this land back to you!
[Cheering and applause]
[Rooster crowing]
[Heraldic fanfare playing]
[Triumphant music]
My friends,
this peace has been hard won.
Keeping it will be even harder.
We trust you, Robin.
The people trust you.
I may have been the man
to lead us in rebellion,
but not in peacetime.
This position must go to
a man of honour, a statesman,
someone that we can all trust.
Lancelot, you've proven yourself
to be worthy.
I hand this position to you.
I don't know what to say.
All those in favour say, "Aye".
[All] Aye!
Then it is settled.
You honour me, dear friends.
I will not let you down.
Have we finished
with all this talking then?
It would seem so.
Let's gets sloshed.
To a new future.
[All] To a new future!
[Bell tolling]
[Soft music playing]
And with the power
vested in me,
I now pronounce you
man and wife.
You may now kiss the bride.
[Cheering and applause]
[Wolf whistling]
How long do you think
this'll last for?
Where there is love,
there is hope.
[Triumphant music plays]
[Arrows whistling]
[Epic music playing]
[Lightning cracking]
[Horses neighing]
[Birds chirping]
[Coins tinkling]
[Heraldic fanfare playing]
[Hammer clanking]
[Screaming and wailing]
[Arrows whistling]
[Ominous music playing]
Surprised to see me?
Wizards like me do not die
unless they plan it
and this adventure
has gone exactly to plan.
The trick lies in not making
people believe you are magic,
but rather making them
believe that you are not.
Long live the king.
[Evil laughing]