The Storage (2011) Movie Script
I definitely know I'm in storage.
But why?
You're in storage
with a million others.
And nobody's buying your stuff.
Storage?
Storage!
Storage!
Anyone there?
Rousku and Raninen?
- Rousku, answer!
Are you down there?
Can't get any lower.
KINOSTO PRESENTS
A TARU MKEL FILM
STORAGE
BASED ON THE NOVEL BY
ARTO SALMINEN
WRITTEN BY
VELI-PEKKA HNNINEN
Niskanen will be at the back door.
Take fifteen sacks
of Carlite plaster to him.
You'll recognize Niskanen?
- Yeah, from the back.
Very funny.
Move it.
The store is full of people.
Thank Him.
- Who?
The son of Da Vid.
Fifteen sacks of plaster. Roger.
Get to work, homo.
I'm in the middle of a game.
And I'm your boss, homo.
Had a fight with the missus
this morning.
Threw a cup of yogurt at her.
Plum and apricot.
I ruined her perm.
Crazy bitch.
She thinks I'm sleeping around.
Are you?
- Are you?
All the time.
Storage!
What is it?
Bring me two ten-liter
latex paint buckets.
As soon as I can.
She threatened to divorce me.
I might be an ex soon.
That makes two of us. I'm an ex too.
Yeah? Whose?
No one's in particular. In general.
I don't want to get a divorce.
She's good looking.
Looks like last year's
Miss Seaside. - What's her name?
Hanna.
- No, I mean Miss Seaside's.
I don't know.
What the hell are you doing?
- Shake your head.
It looks like the bucket
stops moving. - Bullshit.
See for yourself.
- It won't stop moving.
Shake it!
Storage!
Shit.
- Are you there?
No, we're here.
Where is the latex paint?
The customer's waiting.
We're busy!
Send the customer here and
I'll shove the bucket up his ass.
I'm sorry.
You monkeys!
When are you going to get it?
We can hear
your cursing and yelling upstairs!
There are women customers!
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
Keep in mind that the world
is full of unemployed guys!
Antero.
Jylhkorpi. Hi.
I salute you,
member of the proletariat -
in your ripstop nylon garment.
Did you lose weight? Gain weight?
I always weigh the same.
It's a law of physics.
I may have a criminal mind, -
but I have to obey
the law of gravity.
Joker.
I'll have forty liters
of black acrylic paint.
Where's the knucklehead?
He's at lunch.
- He doesn't suspect anything?
Raninen?
He's been paralyzed
from the neck up since birth.
I know what this is all about.
- All what?
All this. Society.
Respecting laws.
Good for you.
Want me to take these to the car?
This is the playoffs.
What are you doing standing there?
- Is it forbidden?
It looks suspicious.
Would it be okay if I was smoking?
Or pretended
to be waiting for someone?
Look at that old woman.
I'll go shout something nasty
in her ear.
I know you will.
Ma'am.
A cute old lady like that.
Just had the longest shit ever.
One end in my ass with
the other end in the water. - Wow.
Congratulations.
Attention, shoppers.
Karita Nieminen just had
the longest shit ever... - Asshole!
Relax, I didn't push the button.
- Still.
What's wrong with him?
When you move
your head fast enough, -
the paint bucket stops.
Yeah right.
See for yourself.
It does. Try it.
Shake it all the way
from your knees.
Stop it!
Shut up!
You'll kill me one day.
- My neighbors will kill me.
What are you doing?
- I'm going home.
Right after sex?
It would be crazy to leave before.
You could stay the night.
We could go to work together.
I have to change clothes
and everything.
You ignore me at work.
How so?
I say good morning and thank you.
I'm just saying.
- Saying what?
We can't start screwing at work.
Bye.
A lot of guys would be happy
even to work in storage. - Bullshit.
The only people willing to do this -
are drunks or wanted by the police.
- Which are you?
You have to be crazy to drag
these buckets around for free.
Blame yourself.
Any loser could do your job.
Bullshit.
I blame corporations.
They replace as many people
with machines as they can.
They get a kick out
of creating poverty and misery.
Having to come here ruins my day.
Listen. It ruins my day too.
You're wearing
the exact same clothes as yesterday.
Stop groping me!
Mom's little darling,
did you have breakfast?
I scraped the white stuff
off my teeth and ate that.
What stuff?
- Yesterday's chicken balls.
Gross! Don't you brush your teeth?
- I don't have a toothbrush.
Can I borrow some milk?
- Please do.
Karita, Kataja wants to see you.
- My coffee will get cold.
You can't keep the boss waiting.
Come on.
Look at these numbers.
Things are disappearing
from storage.
This sure looks strange,
doesn't it?
What's the date of this entry?
- January 12th.
As if today's poor
could afford morality.
You've got some theories.
- That's right.
I'm an old communist;
I know these things.
- You won.
Storage!
- Shit.
Yes, dear?
Seven rolls of wallpaper.
Rasch Victoria. 718409.
Bring it up, please.
Rasch Victoria. I'll bring it up.
You fucked Karita.
How do you know?
- I just found out.
You assumed?
- I guessed.
Assuming is too difficult
for a storage worker.
What is she like?
- Who?
Karita.
Well. Nothing special.
The basic stuff.
She howls like a roller coaster.
How do you know?
- How do you think I know?
Shit.
Is everybody doing her?
C'mon, think about it.
They don't teach you those tricks
in home economics.
Thanks for not bringing them up.
You have a customer waiting?
I'll take these up.
Let's go have lunch
at the Chinese restaurant. - No.
It costs 7 euros.
I'll buy a meat pastry at the store.
I need to tell you
something important.
You have potatoes?
Yes. Rice with everything.
Or french fries.
Okay.
I'll have the sweet and sour pork.
I'll have Kung Pao chicken.
- Yes. Thank you.
This place is run by some criminal -
who smuggles Chinese people
into the country.
He keeps them in chicken cages.
How do you know?
- It was in the paper.
Where do you live?
Lauttasaari. Yes.
How many of you
are there in the apartment?
Stop giving him a hard time.
- I just asked him a question.
But he doesn't understand.
- How do you know?
He just doesn't understand Finnish.
- Bullshit.
Look at him wiping those tables.
Why the hell
is he smiling all the time?
I'm pregnant.
I'm pregnant.
Say something.
Whose is it?
- Yours.
No, it's not.
Even your neighbors' dogs
are screwing you.
And Raninen.
Stop being an asshole.
It's our baby.
We can take a genetic test
or a yeast sample.
You're on the pill.
How can you be pregnant?
I just am.
Fuck you.
You did this on purpose.
Last winter
you talked about having a baby.
I've been taking the pill.
You can still get pregnant.
Who wants to have a baby
with a 35-year old tramp?
I'm 30.
You could've asked me
before you got yourself pregnant.
You have to have an abortion.
I've already
been to the maternity clinic.
Maternity clinic!
- Yes, maternity clinic.
Stop yelling.
They asked if the father is excited.
I said he sure is.
You've got a cross-breeze
in your head and between your legs.
Yes. Pork.
Kung Pao chicken. Yes.
- Thank you.
I told the nurse
you talk to my belly.
They said you're welcome there.
You could listen to the heartbeat.
It's like a horse galloping.
You didn't give them my name,
did you? - Of course I did.
I gave them your name and address.
I said we were moving in together.
This can't be happening.
They asked me if you work or study.
I told them you're unemployed.
Unemployed?
Why the hell did you say that?
Next time we'll tell them
you found work.
It'll make them happy.
You're a fucking fluffhead.
You're totally crazy.
Aren't you going to ask
how far along I am? - No.
That's exactly
what you men are like.
Ready to screw
but can't handle the responsibility.
I would've used
a tractor inner tube -
if I'd known you were feeding
your pills to your fish!
Check, please!
You can move in whenever you like.
We make the perfect couple -
because
your ascendant is in Taurus.
Yeah.
I don't want to hear
about this ever again.
Try feeding your story
to some other guy.
I promise I'll keep my mouth shut.
Yes.
- Yes.
What are you doing?
- It feels good.
Give me the knife.
You're right.
Strange I hadn't thought of this
before. - That's enough.
So you decided to have a manicure?
- This is a pedicure.
I don't know big words.
I even dropped out of swim school.
She's an airhead.
The social workers
will take the baby -
the minute it pops out of her ass.
Be sensible.
There'll be a blood test,
court case and foreclosure.
I don't care.
It'll be easier on you if you settle
the child support with her.
You don't have to become a real dad.
Or change shitty diapers.
I have to pay her for what she did?
What are you doing? - I'll send
a message to my offspring.
Smoke signals from this side
of the twilight zone.
Don't eat these.
What the fuck are you doing airing
out your toes here? - I have to.
Haven't washed them in a week.
These must have been
on the shelf for five years.
Or in the ass of the camel
on the pack.
Two packs?
- Yes.
What for?
For a termination of pregnancy.
- Yes, but why two packs?
These are very strong.
One is enough.
You mustn't exceed the dosage.
- One isn't enough.
I need it for two women.
Play with fire,
sometimes you get burned.
38 euros.
That's a phone number.
In case you have questions.
I should collect rent from you.
Oh, sorry.
This article is just so interesting.
About a new gallery.
They're holding
Keitsi Kejonen's exhibition.
I totally got to check it out.
Here.
Thank you.
Serves him right.
- What?
He stole my yogurt.
Fuck.
Is that a dartboard you're drawing?
I just thought...
It was a bit quiet here.
The whole nation
is crying for more jobs, -
but when you hire people...
I didn't know
you had time to throw darts.
I don't throw darts.
I'm taking this home to my kids.
To your kids?
They're grown up.
How can you have grown-up children?
How old are you?
I mean, they're a friend's kids.
Jesus.
What's this?
It was... damaged in transit.
In transit?
Looks like someone stabbed it.
Must have been damaged
in the factory.
Losses are poison to business.
I can offer jobs -
because I know the bottom line.
People sure are at the bottom.
- What?
Nothing.
One guy in main storage
was selling goods to people.
He would've gone to jail
if his parents hadn't taken a loan.
They had to use their house
as collateral.
You can accuse me of many things,
but not stealing.
No need to get upset.
You should pay us more.
Poor people wouldn't have to pay
for their houses twice.
What did you just say?
Nothing.
I pay my workers according
to the trade union salaries.
I can tell the payroll office
you want to quit.
I didn't say that.
Keep it down then.
Did you have to piss him off?
He accused me of stealing.
- No, he didn't.
If he tells people I'm stealing,
you'll testify for me, right?
Yeah. The hell I will.
Why do I have to do
everything myself? - Thank you.
I only sell paint,
but I'm still a human being!
What's wrong with him?
If he was a woman,
I'd say he's on the rag.
He's acting crazy.
Come have a break.
- No, I won't.
I need to talk to you.
You shouldn't smoke, should you?
Sweet. You're worried.
- I'm not.
But it's not the fetus's fault
the mom is as dumb as a peanut.
If I quit, I'd get a terrible cough
and nausea. I'd get anxious.
The baby would suffer
and kick restlessly.
Who told you that?
- A doctor.
You're lying.
It was a doctor. I met him in a bar.
Jesus!
That's a real health clinic for you.
What did you want to talk about?
About moving in?
Let's be serious.
I'll pay part of the abortion.
- There won't be one.
There will be a baby.
A cute little bundle of joy.
It'll be a boy
if he takes after his father.
He has little eyes
and a little mouth.
Little eyebrows and everything.
Little hands and little feet.
And tiny little nails.
Okay.
I mean, you're the unwanted one
that should be terminated.
I want to tell you
that I'll pay child support -
but won't do a paternity test
or play house with you.
Why are you so negative?
Because kids are
what I hate most in the world.
Second most, adults.
Men.
And women.
Except when I'm fucking them.
Just so you know,
the big boss is in the staff room.
Mind your language on the intercom.
Don't throw darts.
What's he doing here?
- Going over the books.
He's got a pile of receipt rolls
and delivery lists on the table.
Why?
- I don't know.
Maybe this store is unprofitable.
I mean, this isn't unprofitable, -
but it's not profitable enough.
Soon we'll all have to...
look for jobs.
Kataja is a man of action.
He won't negotiate
if there are going to be layoffs.
Or maybe
someone is stealing from here.
Not the toilet.
I need to go into the shop.
What the fuck is going on?
Everybody's talking about stealing.
I'll take lunch.
How come you're so jumpy?
I'm not.
How long
will the bonehead be gone?
At least 45 minutes.
Son.
I need a couple of rolls of carpet.
Stop, for fuck's sake.
Whole rolls? - Yup.
Three of those blue-gray ones.
Jesus.
They cost a thousand a piece.
They don't cost you anything.
They'll cost me my job.
The big boss is here
checking receipt rolls.
He'll notice
if that carpet disappears.
There's stuff worth millions here.
He'll have to check
years of receipt rolls -
before anyone notices anything.
I'll go to jail.
That'll be the end of my career.
If he even notices, -
I'll be the criminal.
You can say you were taking a shit.
That would be one heck of a turd.
A marine cable.
You could have constipation.
Believe me.
There's no risk
of you getting caught.
Besides, -
you'll get your share.
Kataja is rich
because he robs people.
That's why he's afraid
people will rob him.
Society is built
around crime and guilt.
Society wouldn't function
if there was no crime.
Crime is
the highest form of humanity.
Your shitty philosophy
won't help me if I get caught.
Why do you steal at your job?
You told me to. - Don't try
to blame me for your choices.
Why? - Storage worker's
salary is too low.
Your life is too high
for your salary.
That's a nice watch.
You wear
an expensive leather jacket.
That must've cost
at least 300 euros. - 500.
You don't steal to live.
You steal
because you want to live large.
That's your motive.
Why do you steal?
- Don't get mad.
I just want
you to have clear morals.
You can't have high morals
because you're a thief.
But your morals have to be clear!
- Impossible for me.
That's right.
Because you're a child of your time.
There's nothing clear about you.
Not even tears -
because you don't know how to cry.
I'm writing an application
for a million euros.
I'd be happy
to get out of this shit.
Have you ever won the lottery?
- Yeah.
How much? - I win money every time
I don't buy a lottery ticket.
I play the same numbers
every week.
But I reorganize them
every now and then.
But you play the same numbers?
- Yup.
What's the point of crossing
them off in a different order?
I try to get them in the order
they come out of the machine.
I want the jackpot,
not the extra winning numbers.
Got it.
Rousku.
- What?
Come to the staff room.
I just had coffee.
- You didn't.
Ask the store manager
if you can borrow the company van.
Why? - Because
he's found his feminine side.
What for? - You can bring
your stuff to my house.
I'm not moving into your place.
When are you going to get it?
You can move on the weekend.
- I'm not your boyfriend.
Karita.
Get it in your head, will you?
You don't know what's best for you.
There is no best for me.
Yes, there is. Here.
Fuck!
Listen, darling.
You'll move in with me.
We'll have fun together.
If you don't want to move, -
I'll tell Kataja and the store
manager you steal at work.
What the fuck did you just say?
- You think I haven't noticed?
It's that big old guy.
Comes and gets stuff
when Raninen is at lunch.
All he ever pays for
is a paintbrush or a roll of tape.
You've got it all wrong.
That's an old friend of my dad's.
He comes here to talk.
Oh yeah?
Then there must be a receipt
for the carpet you put in his van.
The store manager?
Could you check if Rousku sold
three rolls of carpet yesterday?
Or if he stole them.
Fuckin' lunatic!
Excuse me.
What was it? I couldn't hear you.
Nothing. Forget it.
Oh, I almost forgot.
Congratulations, Rousku!
Why? - You're having
a little storage worker.
Bring cigars when he's born.
Horror.
Could somebody please shoot me?
- Stop whining. You're a big boy.
We've spent practically
every weekend together.
We've had fun, haven't we?
In bed, you pant and bellow
like a bull when you cum.
And if I say no?
- I'll tell Kataja.
You'll go to jail.
You don't have parents
that could bail you out.
Fucking blackmailer.
Fucking thief.
Please hang your clothes
over the balcony to air out.
I don't want fur beetles
in the house.
Should I also go to the balcony?
Honey, you'll sleep next to me.
You think
we should get a bigger bed?
It's no use.
What? - That bed will be fine
for the time I'll be living here.
What time?
- About three years.
The average length of
relationships in the suburbs.
I'm happy
we get to go to work together-
and go shopping at the mall.
- Yeah.
I'll put your books
in the cleaning closet for now.
I guess I need to get a book shelf.
You actually read these all?
- Almost.
I've never read a book
and never will.
Why not? - It's like watching TV
without the picture.
With just the sound.
You're definitely not
the sharpest pencil in the box.
But I'm still the woman
of your dreams.
You sure are.
These cookies are like Oreos,
but a lot cheaper.
There's no sense in buying Oreos.
I HAVE RESTLESS FEESPANK ME, BABY!
SINGING BEE
Ladies and gentlemen.
This man is sweet like fudge.
Producer Vexi Salmi is the judge!
Vexi Salmi is his name!
Cut the crap.
Looks like
we have a tough judge tonight.
Here we go.
She went off the pill!
How do you know?
- Women do it these days.
"A mother and a wife"
sounds more respectable -
than "long-term unemployed."
"Multiply and fill the earth."
If you can't find work.
There should be
a law against the pill.
Son, don't say that.
We didn't have the pill
when I was young.
It was damn hard to get laid.
We didn't have porn magazines
or videos, either.
We stared at the girl
on the cover of the oatmeal box.
And jerked off.
Go.
Before Kataja or
somebody else comes.
Now you have a good reason to steal.
What do you mean?
You'll steal a future
for your child.
How else will a storage worker's
child become something in life?
Or he'll become a loser
like his parents.
He'll learn the tricks
in your local elementary school.
And the rest in prison.
Maybe it's better
I go to prison instead.
Of course you have to meet her.
- Why?
We're having a baby,
which makes her your mother-in-law.
Have you forgotten I'm becoming
a father against my will?
So how can I have a mother-in-law?
It's important to her.
And to you. My mom's okay.
If she's anything like you,
she's ugly and stupid.
I understand you.
You act cocky
because you're under my thumb.
Smells like piss here.
Are these city rental flats?
- Yeah. Mom was lucky to get one.
Right.
I hope her boyfriend's not there.
He's gross.
That's his name on the door?
Mynttinen?
Uh-huh.
Come on in.
So this is Antero.
Hello.
- Hello.
Come on in.
There's coffee and cake.
Hello.
Asshole.
So -
you'll be a father soon.
I guess I have no choice.
I'm happy to become a grandma.
I've even looked
like a grandma for ages.
Are you -
going to be in the delivery room?
Karita promised to be there.
He'll be there.
These days all men do.
What do they do there?
- I don't know.
They watch your privates rip apart.
It's still lovely
to have your man by your side.
When I was having you, -
your dad was running around on me.
Other men brought flowers,
but your dad never came.
He was busy elsewhere.
- Mom, shut up.
Antero's not interested.
- I see.
Shoot. Shoot!
How do you put up
with a guy like that?
Well, it's not like
I can lure Robert Redford here.
What do you need a man for?
- You know what I need him for.
You're a woman.
I'm sure you understand.
I like it when
my lady neighbors are jealous -
when I'm out,
happy and glowing with my man.
And he doesn't beat me.
- Antero doesn't, either.
Are you going to get married?
- We don't know yet.
No, we're not.
- That's good.
It's easier to separate
when the time comes.
And it will come.
- Yes, it will.
That's right.
Mom.
You have lipstick on your teeth.
You should've said earlier.
Karita's father liked
to try out business ideas.
Then he tried to kill me.
Then he tried to kill himself.
The second time he succeeded.
Thanks to your dad,
we lived in poverty.
I had to cut up old pigskin gloves
for soup meat.
I did have a salon in Kallio,
though.
Fine people used to come in.
Sinatra did.
Mom, please.
Who?
- Sinatra. Frank Sinatra.
In Kallio?
- That's right.
Why would he have been there?
His hair must have gotten too long.
She never believes anything.
He came in many times.
You charged the regular price?
- I'm not telling you.
I'm not saying anything.
What the fuck? An olive?
You have a good man in Rousku.
I can tell
he's bad-tempered enough.
He'll do okay in life.
Not that well, but okay.
Someone like me can't even do okay.
What's wrong with your life?
Are you parents alive?
My mom is. Technically.
I can come over and babysit.
You'll get to go to the bar.
Hell no. You'll just make a mess
if you come over.
Listen now.
I've got tons of parenting advice.
I don't need it. See you.
- Fine. See you.
Don't believe everything
my mom says. - Oh yeah?
I think she used to be a hooker.
At least she never had a salon.
They say poverty is inherited.
When I look at you and your mom...
Whew.
Don't worry about me.
You have to think
about your child's future.
He's got no future.
He's a third-generation loser.
Hi.
- Hello.
Who's in there?
- Jarkko and Juha.
Gotta have a beer.
Boy, put your headphones on.
You went to the store.
- Bring me liverwurst.
On bread?
- No, the whole thing.
What's on?
Current Issues.
The erosion of public health care.
Blah.
What's on Channel 1?
A documentary on euthanasia.
Great.
How long can I fuck you?
Almost till I give birth.
You want to? - Yeah.
I guess
you're an alternative mother too.
But I'm not as crazy as them.
I'll tell you a little about
the admittance examination.
Excuse me.
May I tell how I've prepared?
Sure.
I've analyzed my dreams and visions.
I've harnessed the energy in them.
In the summer we both had
recurring dreams about birds.
I made a mask with bird feathers.
We built a nest with reeds
at our summerhouse.
I like to go in it
and hatch my belly.
Thank you.
Yes, alternative child birth
is a good... alternative.
Let me tell you
about the examination.
You don't really think
about the mothers here.
You want us to be slaves
to medicine and hospital hierarchy.
Why don't you emphasize -
the importance of singing
and shouting during childbirth?
Jesus Christ.
In the army
they make servicemen sing.
It drains you out on the march.
We didn't go to the army.
- That's a shame.
You'd make great officers.
Okay, let's get some fresh air.
I want to talk to you. Get in.
I'm on my lunch break.
- Then you have time.
We'll take a short ride.
Come sit in the front.
- No, I'm good here.
Buckle up.
Somebody's stealing.
I don't how much and what, -
but the losses are inexplicable.
That has to end, right?
- Yeah.
I think you know something.
- Me?
But you're not telling.
- Telling what?
I actually respect you.
Real men don't tell on people.
But now that I know
what's going on...
What is Raninen up to?
- How should I know?
Never mind. You don't have to say.
Why don't we do it this way:
I'll ask you if it's Raninen.
If you don't say anything, -
it's him.
I don't want to do that...
Is it Raninen?
Oh, I almost forgot.
You're going to be a father.
That's alright.
- You want a boy or a girl?
I don't know. - It doesn't matter,
right? As long as it's healthy.
I don't care if it's retarded
as long as it's a boy.
You have a wicked sense of humor.
I created this company from nothing.
I worked as
a bricklayer's helper in the 70s.
I sweated carrying mortar.
For a day's salary
you only got calluses on your ass.
Fringe benefits
meant frozen fingers -
and Sundays off.
I figured I had to do something.
I started saving.
The other guys would buy booze.
I bought old bread -
and washed it down with bad milk.
I rode my bike to work.
Every fucking day,
summer and winter. 15 kilometers.
That's how I saved up a nest egg.
I bought leftover paint
from the construction site -
and sold it in neatly packed jars.
That's how it started.
Now I have 40 stores
and 300 employees.
Every fucking month
I pay your salaries.
Maternity allowance, sick days.
Summer vacation, Christmas vacation.
Pension plans and employment costs.
On the few pennies
I have left after that, -
I pay 60-percent tax.
On top of everything, -
I got a 10,000-euro ticket
for speeding on Ring Road 3.
Fucking hell!
This society will collapse soon.
You can quote me on that.
I can just barely tolerate
all these payments and taxes, -
but I will not tolerate
financing some asshole -
who's stealing from me.
Fucking hell! It stops now! Fuck!
Going to the police will do
more harm than good.
I'm not going to blame anyone
or take measures, except one:
I'm firing Raninen.
What?
- You're fired.
Holy fuck.
Fuck.
I've never stolen anything.
It's against my principles.
This isn't a matter of principle.
In practice,
someone stole from storage.
You're fucking blind!
I haven't stolen anything.
Rousku can testify. - No one's
testifying for or against anyone.
This is not a court case.
I just want you out of here.
Then I have another announcement:
From now on, Rousku's title
will be storage manager.
I also hired a new man
to replace Raninen.
Everything's clear?
- No! I didn't steal anything!
So everything's clear.
I need a taxi. Thank you.
You should go to the
unemployment office in the morning.
That's easy for you to say. Manager.
I didn't come up with the title.
What are you doing?
Since I got fired for stealing,
I'm going to steal.
What do you need
that much sandpaper for?
I'll wipe my ass with it.
Life doesn't feel so hard -
when you're scraping your cheeks
with sandpaper.
Shit...
To the nearest liquor store, please.
I think he just lost everything.
No, he's still got things to look
forward to. And that's even worse.
What's that?
- I got it at the flea market.
It'll be nice when I paint it.
You could warm them up
and eat off a plate.
With me.
Fuck.
Fuck!
When your kid learns to talk, -
his first word won't be "mother."
- Fuck you!
And why do you keep
talking about my baby?
It's our baby!
Shut up!
Raninen got fired.
- Why?
He got caught. Things were
disappearing from storage.
Why did he get fired?
You're the one ripping them off.
You've got it all wrong.
I didn't steal anything.
You can ask Kataja.
We figured it out together.
- I don't get it.
You know what that means?
You can no longer blackmail me.
- I haven't done it in a long time.
And you never will.
Have a lovely pregnancy
and a nice labor!
You can blackmail someone else
into the delivery room.
Raninen. Or your mom.
And her boyfriend.
Antero. You can't do this.
- You can call me Rousku.
I once did wallpapering
for this doctor.
He had a preserved fetus
in a jar full of spirit.
I drank the spirit.
I left the fetus
on the bottom of the jar to rest.
You're a fucking animal!
Stop, for fuck's sake!
Fuck. Stop!
Son, you know women?
No, I don't.
You came back.
Let's not talk about what happened.
Or anything else.
What do you mean?
Let's not pour our hearts out.
Let's not open up.
Yeah, that would piss me off, too.
One thing.
Don't ever
try to blackmail me again.
There's no need to.
I think we need new curtains.
We should move
these wallpaper boxes. - Yeah.
You can sit there.
Don't work too hard.
I'll be back.
"Yeehaw! Yeehaw!"
"It's better to tell people
what to expect."
"Argh! Yeehaw!"
No. "Yeehaw! Argh!"
Hell must be full.
We've got dead employees.
Kataja gets compensation
for hiring them.
He had to hire
a long-term unemployed person.
They're all disasters.
Why doesn't he pay more?
No one wants to sweat here -
if it makes
no difference moneywise.
I guess they could pay more
if we didn't have to support -
hundreds of thousands
of welfare cases.
Couldn't we find
better men among them?
The better ones already have jobs.
The rest are taking career courses
in the liquor business.
And women.
They have panic attacks
and toxic mold syndrome.
Menopause and hip problems.
Soft tissue arthritis
and everything.
Or they call work in the morning -
saying they can't find a hair pin.
Ask Kataja if you don't believe me.
He knows people are comatose
like watery oatmeal.
And you know what?
- What?
I agree with him.
"One group heads to the stalls, -
looking for shelter."
You still have energy to sit?
Well, I'm a little tired.
Where did you work before?
I was the parking lot inspector
at Citymarket.
What did you do?
Not much. Sat in a plastic booth
and read Superman comics.
The unemployment office
sent me to a couple of courses.
I took courses in positive thinking
and feng shui.
Feng shui? Is it food?
I can't remember. I guess it was.
What would you like to do?
- I don't know.
I'm sure you have goals.
Or are you going
to live on feng shui? - No.
But I don't want
to do shitty jobs like this.
I want to work
in the music industry.
I want a job
with some rock 'n' roll.
You play an instrument?
- No.
But you want to work
in the music industry? - Yeah.
Or somewhere
with some rock 'n' roll.
Hey.
My blood sugar is low, -
so can I take lunch now?
Of course.
We've worked so hard.
- Yeah.
Yk, come here!
Yk!
Yk!
Don't wake the sleeping one.
Is he dead?
- Yeah.
Who's he?
- Yk.
He replaced Raninen.
Where did Raninen go?
He got fired for stealing.
Jesus Christ.
You condemned him
to eternal unemployment.
Aren't you ashamed?
Should I have told on you?
I still can.
I don't blame you for anything.
I just asked if you're ashamed.
What business is that of yours?
I just wanted to know -
if other people are
as morally deformed as I am.
Yes, they are.
We shouldn't be ashamed
of something so normal.
I'm not ashamed of anything.
A river is not ashamed of running.
I'll take these.
Unless you're afraid
of doing business with me.
The past sins
are on Raninen's record.
The new ones will be...
You have no shame.
You have no morals whatsoever.
- Okay, get going.
I respect you.
- Sure.
Are you the boss or the lackey?
- Neither to you.
It's not going to be born here,
is it? - What? - Your baby.
We don't have a baby.
What a genius.
- Fuck you...
Does it hurt?
Thanks!
Don't push upwards. Push downwards!
It's going to be an Aquarius.
When you have a contraction, -
try pushing in this direction.
Push!
Push!
Good. Now it's moving.
One more.
- I can't!
Yes, you can.
- One more good one.
It's a girl?
Yes.
Do you want to cut
the umbilical cord?
No.
It's not like this is
a town hall opening ceremony, is it?
And you're not the mayor, are you?
How come you're so late?
Karita gave birth.
Really?
You should've said so.
Boy or girl?
Girl.
I like girls. I even married one.
How was the delivery?
Fell from darkness like shit falls
on tracks from a train's toilet.
Are you going to take time off?
I guess Yk isn't here today, is he?
No.
- Then I'll stay and work.
What?
Nothing.
That guy looked like Raninen.
- You sure?
I must've been mistaken.
Yeah, Daddy must've been mistaken.
She has your ears.
I guess.
Soon we'll start making
a brother or a sister for her.
Don't get too excited now.
That's what will happen.
You were against having her,
but now you're all soft.
What do you mean?
The look on your face
is not your own.
It's the look of our family.
She must be hungry.
Why don't you breastfeed her
and I'll go have a smoke.
Rousku, dammit!
Hey!
I almost didn't recognize you.
You've changed so much.
Oh yeah? So have you.
No offense.
Did you have a kid?
God dammit, you became a dad.
That's it.
Yeah. It's a girl.
Hey! Listen, knuckleheads!
This is my best friend.
He had a baby girl.
You have a photo?
Oh.
A girl.
You always knew how to shoot
into the top-left corner.
I'll buy her a birthday gift.
Okay.
Gotta go.
- Yeah. Bye.
See you later.
Kataja said
we'll be closed next Monday.
Uh-huh. Do we get a day off?
No. We'll be taking
a complete inventory.
Why?
- Exactly.
He still thinks
things are disappearing.
He should take
inventory of his head.
Have you noticed anything
suspicious about the new guy?
What?
He's really good at throwing darts.
What are you doing?
Don't worry. Just play.
One more hour.
I'm fine if you want to leave.
- I can't.
The store manager might call
the unemployment office.
You have my permission.
Oh? Okay then.
Bye. See you tomorrow.
Hi, this is Rousku.
I'd like to place an order.
Yello.
- Hi. This is Rousku.
You?
I wondered whose number this is.
Why are you calling this late?
Can you come to the store tomorrow?
- Why?
I have a special offer for you.
Wow. Good service.
Could you arrange it so
that the invoice comes to me?
Then the delivery lists won't match.
Tell them you got the wrong client.
What are you up to?
You're trying to get
the wholesale discount on paint?
You're smart.
- You can charge me the full price.
This load is worth thousands.
What are you painting?
I don't know yet.
I need to paint
at least one baby crib.
Fine. As long as
the company gets paid. - It will.
You sure he isn't dead?
He's sleeping
in the same place as last time.
I haven't sniffed him.
But where does it say that
work is a privilege for the living?
Or unemployment.
It doesn't matter where he sleeps.
Capitalism makes addicts of us all.
They lower the price of alcohol -
and make drugs available
just outside the mall.
That's how they destroy
people's desire to revolt.
Communism doesn't have that problem?
Communism has its faults.
The Nazis tortured their prisoners
to make them tell the truth.
Communists did it
to make them tell lies.
I never understood why.
- But you are a communist, right?
I'm Brezhnevian!
In the worst meaning of the word.
I support the era of stagnation
and paternalism.
I fondly remember those times -
when people were respected
for things other than their greed -
cast in bronze.
Then you'll appreciate this.
What?
What's this?
- It's an invoice you're gonna pay.
Why should I pay your invoice?
It's an invoice for all the stuff-
you've gotten
for a third of the price.
Or actually for the stuff
you've stolen after Raninen left.
I'm fine
with Kataja paying the rest.
Why should I pay this?
We're taking inventory.
We'll both sink.
I think
you have more to lose than me.
Fuck!
Why don't you let
that simpleton take the blame?
I don't have a theory on that.
So I'll have to be practical.
Maybe my modus operandi
has changed.
You fuckin' rat.
- Rousku!
You have some nerve.
Rousku!
- In a minute.
Will it be taken care of?
Yes, it will.
This shitty world!
I see.
So this is the little Rousku.
That's her, asleep and farting.
It's good you're here
to get a glimpse of your future.
Society will make you
a mental midget -
dependent on earnings.
Then they'll move you to storage -
to await later use.
Thank you.
Don't pay him any mind.
There's no cycle
in poor people's lives.
At least none big enough
to be noticed.
And none so small that
a smaller one couldn't fit inside.
What is that nonsense?
Look.
See how the black dots twinkle?
See?
There they are. In neat rows.
A hundred black stars.
Poor people's space.
Storage.
Storage?
Rousku?
Yk?
Anyone there?
A couple of years later, -
Mom and Dad still haven't divorced.
Mom is planning a church wedding.
Raninen joined the AA
and won the lottery.
Happy birthday, dear Jessica
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, little Jessica!
Open it! Raninen finally
brought the birthday gift.
Just a little something.
You want juice?
- Want to open the present?
Let Daddy help you.
You blew out the candles well.
Very well.
Something to drink?
Proofread by Rich Lyons
But why?
You're in storage
with a million others.
And nobody's buying your stuff.
Storage?
Storage!
Storage!
Anyone there?
Rousku and Raninen?
- Rousku, answer!
Are you down there?
Can't get any lower.
KINOSTO PRESENTS
A TARU MKEL FILM
STORAGE
BASED ON THE NOVEL BY
ARTO SALMINEN
WRITTEN BY
VELI-PEKKA HNNINEN
Niskanen will be at the back door.
Take fifteen sacks
of Carlite plaster to him.
You'll recognize Niskanen?
- Yeah, from the back.
Very funny.
Move it.
The store is full of people.
Thank Him.
- Who?
The son of Da Vid.
Fifteen sacks of plaster. Roger.
Get to work, homo.
I'm in the middle of a game.
And I'm your boss, homo.
Had a fight with the missus
this morning.
Threw a cup of yogurt at her.
Plum and apricot.
I ruined her perm.
Crazy bitch.
She thinks I'm sleeping around.
Are you?
- Are you?
All the time.
Storage!
What is it?
Bring me two ten-liter
latex paint buckets.
As soon as I can.
She threatened to divorce me.
I might be an ex soon.
That makes two of us. I'm an ex too.
Yeah? Whose?
No one's in particular. In general.
I don't want to get a divorce.
She's good looking.
Looks like last year's
Miss Seaside. - What's her name?
Hanna.
- No, I mean Miss Seaside's.
I don't know.
What the hell are you doing?
- Shake your head.
It looks like the bucket
stops moving. - Bullshit.
See for yourself.
- It won't stop moving.
Shake it!
Storage!
Shit.
- Are you there?
No, we're here.
Where is the latex paint?
The customer's waiting.
We're busy!
Send the customer here and
I'll shove the bucket up his ass.
I'm sorry.
You monkeys!
When are you going to get it?
We can hear
your cursing and yelling upstairs!
There are women customers!
Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
Keep in mind that the world
is full of unemployed guys!
Antero.
Jylhkorpi. Hi.
I salute you,
member of the proletariat -
in your ripstop nylon garment.
Did you lose weight? Gain weight?
I always weigh the same.
It's a law of physics.
I may have a criminal mind, -
but I have to obey
the law of gravity.
Joker.
I'll have forty liters
of black acrylic paint.
Where's the knucklehead?
He's at lunch.
- He doesn't suspect anything?
Raninen?
He's been paralyzed
from the neck up since birth.
I know what this is all about.
- All what?
All this. Society.
Respecting laws.
Good for you.
Want me to take these to the car?
This is the playoffs.
What are you doing standing there?
- Is it forbidden?
It looks suspicious.
Would it be okay if I was smoking?
Or pretended
to be waiting for someone?
Look at that old woman.
I'll go shout something nasty
in her ear.
I know you will.
Ma'am.
A cute old lady like that.
Just had the longest shit ever.
One end in my ass with
the other end in the water. - Wow.
Congratulations.
Attention, shoppers.
Karita Nieminen just had
the longest shit ever... - Asshole!
Relax, I didn't push the button.
- Still.
What's wrong with him?
When you move
your head fast enough, -
the paint bucket stops.
Yeah right.
See for yourself.
It does. Try it.
Shake it all the way
from your knees.
Stop it!
Shut up!
You'll kill me one day.
- My neighbors will kill me.
What are you doing?
- I'm going home.
Right after sex?
It would be crazy to leave before.
You could stay the night.
We could go to work together.
I have to change clothes
and everything.
You ignore me at work.
How so?
I say good morning and thank you.
I'm just saying.
- Saying what?
We can't start screwing at work.
Bye.
A lot of guys would be happy
even to work in storage. - Bullshit.
The only people willing to do this -
are drunks or wanted by the police.
- Which are you?
You have to be crazy to drag
these buckets around for free.
Blame yourself.
Any loser could do your job.
Bullshit.
I blame corporations.
They replace as many people
with machines as they can.
They get a kick out
of creating poverty and misery.
Having to come here ruins my day.
Listen. It ruins my day too.
You're wearing
the exact same clothes as yesterday.
Stop groping me!
Mom's little darling,
did you have breakfast?
I scraped the white stuff
off my teeth and ate that.
What stuff?
- Yesterday's chicken balls.
Gross! Don't you brush your teeth?
- I don't have a toothbrush.
Can I borrow some milk?
- Please do.
Karita, Kataja wants to see you.
- My coffee will get cold.
You can't keep the boss waiting.
Come on.
Look at these numbers.
Things are disappearing
from storage.
This sure looks strange,
doesn't it?
What's the date of this entry?
- January 12th.
As if today's poor
could afford morality.
You've got some theories.
- That's right.
I'm an old communist;
I know these things.
- You won.
Storage!
- Shit.
Yes, dear?
Seven rolls of wallpaper.
Rasch Victoria. 718409.
Bring it up, please.
Rasch Victoria. I'll bring it up.
You fucked Karita.
How do you know?
- I just found out.
You assumed?
- I guessed.
Assuming is too difficult
for a storage worker.
What is she like?
- Who?
Karita.
Well. Nothing special.
The basic stuff.
She howls like a roller coaster.
How do you know?
- How do you think I know?
Shit.
Is everybody doing her?
C'mon, think about it.
They don't teach you those tricks
in home economics.
Thanks for not bringing them up.
You have a customer waiting?
I'll take these up.
Let's go have lunch
at the Chinese restaurant. - No.
It costs 7 euros.
I'll buy a meat pastry at the store.
I need to tell you
something important.
You have potatoes?
Yes. Rice with everything.
Or french fries.
Okay.
I'll have the sweet and sour pork.
I'll have Kung Pao chicken.
- Yes. Thank you.
This place is run by some criminal -
who smuggles Chinese people
into the country.
He keeps them in chicken cages.
How do you know?
- It was in the paper.
Where do you live?
Lauttasaari. Yes.
How many of you
are there in the apartment?
Stop giving him a hard time.
- I just asked him a question.
But he doesn't understand.
- How do you know?
He just doesn't understand Finnish.
- Bullshit.
Look at him wiping those tables.
Why the hell
is he smiling all the time?
I'm pregnant.
I'm pregnant.
Say something.
Whose is it?
- Yours.
No, it's not.
Even your neighbors' dogs
are screwing you.
And Raninen.
Stop being an asshole.
It's our baby.
We can take a genetic test
or a yeast sample.
You're on the pill.
How can you be pregnant?
I just am.
Fuck you.
You did this on purpose.
Last winter
you talked about having a baby.
I've been taking the pill.
You can still get pregnant.
Who wants to have a baby
with a 35-year old tramp?
I'm 30.
You could've asked me
before you got yourself pregnant.
You have to have an abortion.
I've already
been to the maternity clinic.
Maternity clinic!
- Yes, maternity clinic.
Stop yelling.
They asked if the father is excited.
I said he sure is.
You've got a cross-breeze
in your head and between your legs.
Yes. Pork.
Kung Pao chicken. Yes.
- Thank you.
I told the nurse
you talk to my belly.
They said you're welcome there.
You could listen to the heartbeat.
It's like a horse galloping.
You didn't give them my name,
did you? - Of course I did.
I gave them your name and address.
I said we were moving in together.
This can't be happening.
They asked me if you work or study.
I told them you're unemployed.
Unemployed?
Why the hell did you say that?
Next time we'll tell them
you found work.
It'll make them happy.
You're a fucking fluffhead.
You're totally crazy.
Aren't you going to ask
how far along I am? - No.
That's exactly
what you men are like.
Ready to screw
but can't handle the responsibility.
I would've used
a tractor inner tube -
if I'd known you were feeding
your pills to your fish!
Check, please!
You can move in whenever you like.
We make the perfect couple -
because
your ascendant is in Taurus.
Yeah.
I don't want to hear
about this ever again.
Try feeding your story
to some other guy.
I promise I'll keep my mouth shut.
Yes.
- Yes.
What are you doing?
- It feels good.
Give me the knife.
You're right.
Strange I hadn't thought of this
before. - That's enough.
So you decided to have a manicure?
- This is a pedicure.
I don't know big words.
I even dropped out of swim school.
She's an airhead.
The social workers
will take the baby -
the minute it pops out of her ass.
Be sensible.
There'll be a blood test,
court case and foreclosure.
I don't care.
It'll be easier on you if you settle
the child support with her.
You don't have to become a real dad.
Or change shitty diapers.
I have to pay her for what she did?
What are you doing? - I'll send
a message to my offspring.
Smoke signals from this side
of the twilight zone.
Don't eat these.
What the fuck are you doing airing
out your toes here? - I have to.
Haven't washed them in a week.
These must have been
on the shelf for five years.
Or in the ass of the camel
on the pack.
Two packs?
- Yes.
What for?
For a termination of pregnancy.
- Yes, but why two packs?
These are very strong.
One is enough.
You mustn't exceed the dosage.
- One isn't enough.
I need it for two women.
Play with fire,
sometimes you get burned.
38 euros.
That's a phone number.
In case you have questions.
I should collect rent from you.
Oh, sorry.
This article is just so interesting.
About a new gallery.
They're holding
Keitsi Kejonen's exhibition.
I totally got to check it out.
Here.
Thank you.
Serves him right.
- What?
He stole my yogurt.
Fuck.
Is that a dartboard you're drawing?
I just thought...
It was a bit quiet here.
The whole nation
is crying for more jobs, -
but when you hire people...
I didn't know
you had time to throw darts.
I don't throw darts.
I'm taking this home to my kids.
To your kids?
They're grown up.
How can you have grown-up children?
How old are you?
I mean, they're a friend's kids.
Jesus.
What's this?
It was... damaged in transit.
In transit?
Looks like someone stabbed it.
Must have been damaged
in the factory.
Losses are poison to business.
I can offer jobs -
because I know the bottom line.
People sure are at the bottom.
- What?
Nothing.
One guy in main storage
was selling goods to people.
He would've gone to jail
if his parents hadn't taken a loan.
They had to use their house
as collateral.
You can accuse me of many things,
but not stealing.
No need to get upset.
You should pay us more.
Poor people wouldn't have to pay
for their houses twice.
What did you just say?
Nothing.
I pay my workers according
to the trade union salaries.
I can tell the payroll office
you want to quit.
I didn't say that.
Keep it down then.
Did you have to piss him off?
He accused me of stealing.
- No, he didn't.
If he tells people I'm stealing,
you'll testify for me, right?
Yeah. The hell I will.
Why do I have to do
everything myself? - Thank you.
I only sell paint,
but I'm still a human being!
What's wrong with him?
If he was a woman,
I'd say he's on the rag.
He's acting crazy.
Come have a break.
- No, I won't.
I need to talk to you.
You shouldn't smoke, should you?
Sweet. You're worried.
- I'm not.
But it's not the fetus's fault
the mom is as dumb as a peanut.
If I quit, I'd get a terrible cough
and nausea. I'd get anxious.
The baby would suffer
and kick restlessly.
Who told you that?
- A doctor.
You're lying.
It was a doctor. I met him in a bar.
Jesus!
That's a real health clinic for you.
What did you want to talk about?
About moving in?
Let's be serious.
I'll pay part of the abortion.
- There won't be one.
There will be a baby.
A cute little bundle of joy.
It'll be a boy
if he takes after his father.
He has little eyes
and a little mouth.
Little eyebrows and everything.
Little hands and little feet.
And tiny little nails.
Okay.
I mean, you're the unwanted one
that should be terminated.
I want to tell you
that I'll pay child support -
but won't do a paternity test
or play house with you.
Why are you so negative?
Because kids are
what I hate most in the world.
Second most, adults.
Men.
And women.
Except when I'm fucking them.
Just so you know,
the big boss is in the staff room.
Mind your language on the intercom.
Don't throw darts.
What's he doing here?
- Going over the books.
He's got a pile of receipt rolls
and delivery lists on the table.
Why?
- I don't know.
Maybe this store is unprofitable.
I mean, this isn't unprofitable, -
but it's not profitable enough.
Soon we'll all have to...
look for jobs.
Kataja is a man of action.
He won't negotiate
if there are going to be layoffs.
Or maybe
someone is stealing from here.
Not the toilet.
I need to go into the shop.
What the fuck is going on?
Everybody's talking about stealing.
I'll take lunch.
How come you're so jumpy?
I'm not.
How long
will the bonehead be gone?
At least 45 minutes.
Son.
I need a couple of rolls of carpet.
Stop, for fuck's sake.
Whole rolls? - Yup.
Three of those blue-gray ones.
Jesus.
They cost a thousand a piece.
They don't cost you anything.
They'll cost me my job.
The big boss is here
checking receipt rolls.
He'll notice
if that carpet disappears.
There's stuff worth millions here.
He'll have to check
years of receipt rolls -
before anyone notices anything.
I'll go to jail.
That'll be the end of my career.
If he even notices, -
I'll be the criminal.
You can say you were taking a shit.
That would be one heck of a turd.
A marine cable.
You could have constipation.
Believe me.
There's no risk
of you getting caught.
Besides, -
you'll get your share.
Kataja is rich
because he robs people.
That's why he's afraid
people will rob him.
Society is built
around crime and guilt.
Society wouldn't function
if there was no crime.
Crime is
the highest form of humanity.
Your shitty philosophy
won't help me if I get caught.
Why do you steal at your job?
You told me to. - Don't try
to blame me for your choices.
Why? - Storage worker's
salary is too low.
Your life is too high
for your salary.
That's a nice watch.
You wear
an expensive leather jacket.
That must've cost
at least 300 euros. - 500.
You don't steal to live.
You steal
because you want to live large.
That's your motive.
Why do you steal?
- Don't get mad.
I just want
you to have clear morals.
You can't have high morals
because you're a thief.
But your morals have to be clear!
- Impossible for me.
That's right.
Because you're a child of your time.
There's nothing clear about you.
Not even tears -
because you don't know how to cry.
I'm writing an application
for a million euros.
I'd be happy
to get out of this shit.
Have you ever won the lottery?
- Yeah.
How much? - I win money every time
I don't buy a lottery ticket.
I play the same numbers
every week.
But I reorganize them
every now and then.
But you play the same numbers?
- Yup.
What's the point of crossing
them off in a different order?
I try to get them in the order
they come out of the machine.
I want the jackpot,
not the extra winning numbers.
Got it.
Rousku.
- What?
Come to the staff room.
I just had coffee.
- You didn't.
Ask the store manager
if you can borrow the company van.
Why? - Because
he's found his feminine side.
What for? - You can bring
your stuff to my house.
I'm not moving into your place.
When are you going to get it?
You can move on the weekend.
- I'm not your boyfriend.
Karita.
Get it in your head, will you?
You don't know what's best for you.
There is no best for me.
Yes, there is. Here.
Fuck!
Listen, darling.
You'll move in with me.
We'll have fun together.
If you don't want to move, -
I'll tell Kataja and the store
manager you steal at work.
What the fuck did you just say?
- You think I haven't noticed?
It's that big old guy.
Comes and gets stuff
when Raninen is at lunch.
All he ever pays for
is a paintbrush or a roll of tape.
You've got it all wrong.
That's an old friend of my dad's.
He comes here to talk.
Oh yeah?
Then there must be a receipt
for the carpet you put in his van.
The store manager?
Could you check if Rousku sold
three rolls of carpet yesterday?
Or if he stole them.
Fuckin' lunatic!
Excuse me.
What was it? I couldn't hear you.
Nothing. Forget it.
Oh, I almost forgot.
Congratulations, Rousku!
Why? - You're having
a little storage worker.
Bring cigars when he's born.
Horror.
Could somebody please shoot me?
- Stop whining. You're a big boy.
We've spent practically
every weekend together.
We've had fun, haven't we?
In bed, you pant and bellow
like a bull when you cum.
And if I say no?
- I'll tell Kataja.
You'll go to jail.
You don't have parents
that could bail you out.
Fucking blackmailer.
Fucking thief.
Please hang your clothes
over the balcony to air out.
I don't want fur beetles
in the house.
Should I also go to the balcony?
Honey, you'll sleep next to me.
You think
we should get a bigger bed?
It's no use.
What? - That bed will be fine
for the time I'll be living here.
What time?
- About three years.
The average length of
relationships in the suburbs.
I'm happy
we get to go to work together-
and go shopping at the mall.
- Yeah.
I'll put your books
in the cleaning closet for now.
I guess I need to get a book shelf.
You actually read these all?
- Almost.
I've never read a book
and never will.
Why not? - It's like watching TV
without the picture.
With just the sound.
You're definitely not
the sharpest pencil in the box.
But I'm still the woman
of your dreams.
You sure are.
These cookies are like Oreos,
but a lot cheaper.
There's no sense in buying Oreos.
I HAVE RESTLESS FEESPANK ME, BABY!
SINGING BEE
Ladies and gentlemen.
This man is sweet like fudge.
Producer Vexi Salmi is the judge!
Vexi Salmi is his name!
Cut the crap.
Looks like
we have a tough judge tonight.
Here we go.
She went off the pill!
How do you know?
- Women do it these days.
"A mother and a wife"
sounds more respectable -
than "long-term unemployed."
"Multiply and fill the earth."
If you can't find work.
There should be
a law against the pill.
Son, don't say that.
We didn't have the pill
when I was young.
It was damn hard to get laid.
We didn't have porn magazines
or videos, either.
We stared at the girl
on the cover of the oatmeal box.
And jerked off.
Go.
Before Kataja or
somebody else comes.
Now you have a good reason to steal.
What do you mean?
You'll steal a future
for your child.
How else will a storage worker's
child become something in life?
Or he'll become a loser
like his parents.
He'll learn the tricks
in your local elementary school.
And the rest in prison.
Maybe it's better
I go to prison instead.
Of course you have to meet her.
- Why?
We're having a baby,
which makes her your mother-in-law.
Have you forgotten I'm becoming
a father against my will?
So how can I have a mother-in-law?
It's important to her.
And to you. My mom's okay.
If she's anything like you,
she's ugly and stupid.
I understand you.
You act cocky
because you're under my thumb.
Smells like piss here.
Are these city rental flats?
- Yeah. Mom was lucky to get one.
Right.
I hope her boyfriend's not there.
He's gross.
That's his name on the door?
Mynttinen?
Uh-huh.
Come on in.
So this is Antero.
Hello.
- Hello.
Come on in.
There's coffee and cake.
Hello.
Asshole.
So -
you'll be a father soon.
I guess I have no choice.
I'm happy to become a grandma.
I've even looked
like a grandma for ages.
Are you -
going to be in the delivery room?
Karita promised to be there.
He'll be there.
These days all men do.
What do they do there?
- I don't know.
They watch your privates rip apart.
It's still lovely
to have your man by your side.
When I was having you, -
your dad was running around on me.
Other men brought flowers,
but your dad never came.
He was busy elsewhere.
- Mom, shut up.
Antero's not interested.
- I see.
Shoot. Shoot!
How do you put up
with a guy like that?
Well, it's not like
I can lure Robert Redford here.
What do you need a man for?
- You know what I need him for.
You're a woman.
I'm sure you understand.
I like it when
my lady neighbors are jealous -
when I'm out,
happy and glowing with my man.
And he doesn't beat me.
- Antero doesn't, either.
Are you going to get married?
- We don't know yet.
No, we're not.
- That's good.
It's easier to separate
when the time comes.
And it will come.
- Yes, it will.
That's right.
Mom.
You have lipstick on your teeth.
You should've said earlier.
Karita's father liked
to try out business ideas.
Then he tried to kill me.
Then he tried to kill himself.
The second time he succeeded.
Thanks to your dad,
we lived in poverty.
I had to cut up old pigskin gloves
for soup meat.
I did have a salon in Kallio,
though.
Fine people used to come in.
Sinatra did.
Mom, please.
Who?
- Sinatra. Frank Sinatra.
In Kallio?
- That's right.
Why would he have been there?
His hair must have gotten too long.
She never believes anything.
He came in many times.
You charged the regular price?
- I'm not telling you.
I'm not saying anything.
What the fuck? An olive?
You have a good man in Rousku.
I can tell
he's bad-tempered enough.
He'll do okay in life.
Not that well, but okay.
Someone like me can't even do okay.
What's wrong with your life?
Are you parents alive?
My mom is. Technically.
I can come over and babysit.
You'll get to go to the bar.
Hell no. You'll just make a mess
if you come over.
Listen now.
I've got tons of parenting advice.
I don't need it. See you.
- Fine. See you.
Don't believe everything
my mom says. - Oh yeah?
I think she used to be a hooker.
At least she never had a salon.
They say poverty is inherited.
When I look at you and your mom...
Whew.
Don't worry about me.
You have to think
about your child's future.
He's got no future.
He's a third-generation loser.
Hi.
- Hello.
Who's in there?
- Jarkko and Juha.
Gotta have a beer.
Boy, put your headphones on.
You went to the store.
- Bring me liverwurst.
On bread?
- No, the whole thing.
What's on?
Current Issues.
The erosion of public health care.
Blah.
What's on Channel 1?
A documentary on euthanasia.
Great.
How long can I fuck you?
Almost till I give birth.
You want to? - Yeah.
I guess
you're an alternative mother too.
But I'm not as crazy as them.
I'll tell you a little about
the admittance examination.
Excuse me.
May I tell how I've prepared?
Sure.
I've analyzed my dreams and visions.
I've harnessed the energy in them.
In the summer we both had
recurring dreams about birds.
I made a mask with bird feathers.
We built a nest with reeds
at our summerhouse.
I like to go in it
and hatch my belly.
Thank you.
Yes, alternative child birth
is a good... alternative.
Let me tell you
about the examination.
You don't really think
about the mothers here.
You want us to be slaves
to medicine and hospital hierarchy.
Why don't you emphasize -
the importance of singing
and shouting during childbirth?
Jesus Christ.
In the army
they make servicemen sing.
It drains you out on the march.
We didn't go to the army.
- That's a shame.
You'd make great officers.
Okay, let's get some fresh air.
I want to talk to you. Get in.
I'm on my lunch break.
- Then you have time.
We'll take a short ride.
Come sit in the front.
- No, I'm good here.
Buckle up.
Somebody's stealing.
I don't how much and what, -
but the losses are inexplicable.
That has to end, right?
- Yeah.
I think you know something.
- Me?
But you're not telling.
- Telling what?
I actually respect you.
Real men don't tell on people.
But now that I know
what's going on...
What is Raninen up to?
- How should I know?
Never mind. You don't have to say.
Why don't we do it this way:
I'll ask you if it's Raninen.
If you don't say anything, -
it's him.
I don't want to do that...
Is it Raninen?
Oh, I almost forgot.
You're going to be a father.
That's alright.
- You want a boy or a girl?
I don't know. - It doesn't matter,
right? As long as it's healthy.
I don't care if it's retarded
as long as it's a boy.
You have a wicked sense of humor.
I created this company from nothing.
I worked as
a bricklayer's helper in the 70s.
I sweated carrying mortar.
For a day's salary
you only got calluses on your ass.
Fringe benefits
meant frozen fingers -
and Sundays off.
I figured I had to do something.
I started saving.
The other guys would buy booze.
I bought old bread -
and washed it down with bad milk.
I rode my bike to work.
Every fucking day,
summer and winter. 15 kilometers.
That's how I saved up a nest egg.
I bought leftover paint
from the construction site -
and sold it in neatly packed jars.
That's how it started.
Now I have 40 stores
and 300 employees.
Every fucking month
I pay your salaries.
Maternity allowance, sick days.
Summer vacation, Christmas vacation.
Pension plans and employment costs.
On the few pennies
I have left after that, -
I pay 60-percent tax.
On top of everything, -
I got a 10,000-euro ticket
for speeding on Ring Road 3.
Fucking hell!
This society will collapse soon.
You can quote me on that.
I can just barely tolerate
all these payments and taxes, -
but I will not tolerate
financing some asshole -
who's stealing from me.
Fucking hell! It stops now! Fuck!
Going to the police will do
more harm than good.
I'm not going to blame anyone
or take measures, except one:
I'm firing Raninen.
What?
- You're fired.
Holy fuck.
Fuck.
I've never stolen anything.
It's against my principles.
This isn't a matter of principle.
In practice,
someone stole from storage.
You're fucking blind!
I haven't stolen anything.
Rousku can testify. - No one's
testifying for or against anyone.
This is not a court case.
I just want you out of here.
Then I have another announcement:
From now on, Rousku's title
will be storage manager.
I also hired a new man
to replace Raninen.
Everything's clear?
- No! I didn't steal anything!
So everything's clear.
I need a taxi. Thank you.
You should go to the
unemployment office in the morning.
That's easy for you to say. Manager.
I didn't come up with the title.
What are you doing?
Since I got fired for stealing,
I'm going to steal.
What do you need
that much sandpaper for?
I'll wipe my ass with it.
Life doesn't feel so hard -
when you're scraping your cheeks
with sandpaper.
Shit...
To the nearest liquor store, please.
I think he just lost everything.
No, he's still got things to look
forward to. And that's even worse.
What's that?
- I got it at the flea market.
It'll be nice when I paint it.
You could warm them up
and eat off a plate.
With me.
Fuck.
Fuck!
When your kid learns to talk, -
his first word won't be "mother."
- Fuck you!
And why do you keep
talking about my baby?
It's our baby!
Shut up!
Raninen got fired.
- Why?
He got caught. Things were
disappearing from storage.
Why did he get fired?
You're the one ripping them off.
You've got it all wrong.
I didn't steal anything.
You can ask Kataja.
We figured it out together.
- I don't get it.
You know what that means?
You can no longer blackmail me.
- I haven't done it in a long time.
And you never will.
Have a lovely pregnancy
and a nice labor!
You can blackmail someone else
into the delivery room.
Raninen. Or your mom.
And her boyfriend.
Antero. You can't do this.
- You can call me Rousku.
I once did wallpapering
for this doctor.
He had a preserved fetus
in a jar full of spirit.
I drank the spirit.
I left the fetus
on the bottom of the jar to rest.
You're a fucking animal!
Stop, for fuck's sake!
Fuck. Stop!
Son, you know women?
No, I don't.
You came back.
Let's not talk about what happened.
Or anything else.
What do you mean?
Let's not pour our hearts out.
Let's not open up.
Yeah, that would piss me off, too.
One thing.
Don't ever
try to blackmail me again.
There's no need to.
I think we need new curtains.
We should move
these wallpaper boxes. - Yeah.
You can sit there.
Don't work too hard.
I'll be back.
"Yeehaw! Yeehaw!"
"It's better to tell people
what to expect."
"Argh! Yeehaw!"
No. "Yeehaw! Argh!"
Hell must be full.
We've got dead employees.
Kataja gets compensation
for hiring them.
He had to hire
a long-term unemployed person.
They're all disasters.
Why doesn't he pay more?
No one wants to sweat here -
if it makes
no difference moneywise.
I guess they could pay more
if we didn't have to support -
hundreds of thousands
of welfare cases.
Couldn't we find
better men among them?
The better ones already have jobs.
The rest are taking career courses
in the liquor business.
And women.
They have panic attacks
and toxic mold syndrome.
Menopause and hip problems.
Soft tissue arthritis
and everything.
Or they call work in the morning -
saying they can't find a hair pin.
Ask Kataja if you don't believe me.
He knows people are comatose
like watery oatmeal.
And you know what?
- What?
I agree with him.
"One group heads to the stalls, -
looking for shelter."
You still have energy to sit?
Well, I'm a little tired.
Where did you work before?
I was the parking lot inspector
at Citymarket.
What did you do?
Not much. Sat in a plastic booth
and read Superman comics.
The unemployment office
sent me to a couple of courses.
I took courses in positive thinking
and feng shui.
Feng shui? Is it food?
I can't remember. I guess it was.
What would you like to do?
- I don't know.
I'm sure you have goals.
Or are you going
to live on feng shui? - No.
But I don't want
to do shitty jobs like this.
I want to work
in the music industry.
I want a job
with some rock 'n' roll.
You play an instrument?
- No.
But you want to work
in the music industry? - Yeah.
Or somewhere
with some rock 'n' roll.
Hey.
My blood sugar is low, -
so can I take lunch now?
Of course.
We've worked so hard.
- Yeah.
Yk, come here!
Yk!
Yk!
Don't wake the sleeping one.
Is he dead?
- Yeah.
Who's he?
- Yk.
He replaced Raninen.
Where did Raninen go?
He got fired for stealing.
Jesus Christ.
You condemned him
to eternal unemployment.
Aren't you ashamed?
Should I have told on you?
I still can.
I don't blame you for anything.
I just asked if you're ashamed.
What business is that of yours?
I just wanted to know -
if other people are
as morally deformed as I am.
Yes, they are.
We shouldn't be ashamed
of something so normal.
I'm not ashamed of anything.
A river is not ashamed of running.
I'll take these.
Unless you're afraid
of doing business with me.
The past sins
are on Raninen's record.
The new ones will be...
You have no shame.
You have no morals whatsoever.
- Okay, get going.
I respect you.
- Sure.
Are you the boss or the lackey?
- Neither to you.
It's not going to be born here,
is it? - What? - Your baby.
We don't have a baby.
What a genius.
- Fuck you...
Does it hurt?
Thanks!
Don't push upwards. Push downwards!
It's going to be an Aquarius.
When you have a contraction, -
try pushing in this direction.
Push!
Push!
Good. Now it's moving.
One more.
- I can't!
Yes, you can.
- One more good one.
It's a girl?
Yes.
Do you want to cut
the umbilical cord?
No.
It's not like this is
a town hall opening ceremony, is it?
And you're not the mayor, are you?
How come you're so late?
Karita gave birth.
Really?
You should've said so.
Boy or girl?
Girl.
I like girls. I even married one.
How was the delivery?
Fell from darkness like shit falls
on tracks from a train's toilet.
Are you going to take time off?
I guess Yk isn't here today, is he?
No.
- Then I'll stay and work.
What?
Nothing.
That guy looked like Raninen.
- You sure?
I must've been mistaken.
Yeah, Daddy must've been mistaken.
She has your ears.
I guess.
Soon we'll start making
a brother or a sister for her.
Don't get too excited now.
That's what will happen.
You were against having her,
but now you're all soft.
What do you mean?
The look on your face
is not your own.
It's the look of our family.
She must be hungry.
Why don't you breastfeed her
and I'll go have a smoke.
Rousku, dammit!
Hey!
I almost didn't recognize you.
You've changed so much.
Oh yeah? So have you.
No offense.
Did you have a kid?
God dammit, you became a dad.
That's it.
Yeah. It's a girl.
Hey! Listen, knuckleheads!
This is my best friend.
He had a baby girl.
You have a photo?
Oh.
A girl.
You always knew how to shoot
into the top-left corner.
I'll buy her a birthday gift.
Okay.
Gotta go.
- Yeah. Bye.
See you later.
Kataja said
we'll be closed next Monday.
Uh-huh. Do we get a day off?
No. We'll be taking
a complete inventory.
Why?
- Exactly.
He still thinks
things are disappearing.
He should take
inventory of his head.
Have you noticed anything
suspicious about the new guy?
What?
He's really good at throwing darts.
What are you doing?
Don't worry. Just play.
One more hour.
I'm fine if you want to leave.
- I can't.
The store manager might call
the unemployment office.
You have my permission.
Oh? Okay then.
Bye. See you tomorrow.
Hi, this is Rousku.
I'd like to place an order.
Yello.
- Hi. This is Rousku.
You?
I wondered whose number this is.
Why are you calling this late?
Can you come to the store tomorrow?
- Why?
I have a special offer for you.
Wow. Good service.
Could you arrange it so
that the invoice comes to me?
Then the delivery lists won't match.
Tell them you got the wrong client.
What are you up to?
You're trying to get
the wholesale discount on paint?
You're smart.
- You can charge me the full price.
This load is worth thousands.
What are you painting?
I don't know yet.
I need to paint
at least one baby crib.
Fine. As long as
the company gets paid. - It will.
You sure he isn't dead?
He's sleeping
in the same place as last time.
I haven't sniffed him.
But where does it say that
work is a privilege for the living?
Or unemployment.
It doesn't matter where he sleeps.
Capitalism makes addicts of us all.
They lower the price of alcohol -
and make drugs available
just outside the mall.
That's how they destroy
people's desire to revolt.
Communism doesn't have that problem?
Communism has its faults.
The Nazis tortured their prisoners
to make them tell the truth.
Communists did it
to make them tell lies.
I never understood why.
- But you are a communist, right?
I'm Brezhnevian!
In the worst meaning of the word.
I support the era of stagnation
and paternalism.
I fondly remember those times -
when people were respected
for things other than their greed -
cast in bronze.
Then you'll appreciate this.
What?
What's this?
- It's an invoice you're gonna pay.
Why should I pay your invoice?
It's an invoice for all the stuff-
you've gotten
for a third of the price.
Or actually for the stuff
you've stolen after Raninen left.
I'm fine
with Kataja paying the rest.
Why should I pay this?
We're taking inventory.
We'll both sink.
I think
you have more to lose than me.
Fuck!
Why don't you let
that simpleton take the blame?
I don't have a theory on that.
So I'll have to be practical.
Maybe my modus operandi
has changed.
You fuckin' rat.
- Rousku!
You have some nerve.
Rousku!
- In a minute.
Will it be taken care of?
Yes, it will.
This shitty world!
I see.
So this is the little Rousku.
That's her, asleep and farting.
It's good you're here
to get a glimpse of your future.
Society will make you
a mental midget -
dependent on earnings.
Then they'll move you to storage -
to await later use.
Thank you.
Don't pay him any mind.
There's no cycle
in poor people's lives.
At least none big enough
to be noticed.
And none so small that
a smaller one couldn't fit inside.
What is that nonsense?
Look.
See how the black dots twinkle?
See?
There they are. In neat rows.
A hundred black stars.
Poor people's space.
Storage.
Storage?
Rousku?
Yk?
Anyone there?
A couple of years later, -
Mom and Dad still haven't divorced.
Mom is planning a church wedding.
Raninen joined the AA
and won the lottery.
Happy birthday, dear Jessica
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, little Jessica!
Open it! Raninen finally
brought the birthday gift.
Just a little something.
You want juice?
- Want to open the present?
Let Daddy help you.
You blew out the candles well.
Very well.
Something to drink?
Proofread by Rich Lyons