This Is Joan Collins (2022) Movie Script

Okay, so what
are we waiting for?
We're
getting a nice light.
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
All right.
You look great,
have a look at that-
Well, I look fine in life.
That's what I'm saying.
And usually, I should
look better on the screen
than I do in life.
I'm just gonna move out.
They're just gonna stick
a film light in Joan,
if that's all right?
See, this light is great,
if this is right on my face.
This light is not flattering
because you've got the-
So, this is for your
all big key light down here.
Yeah, I'm getting stiff now,
let's go, let's
just do something.
Are we ready?
Okay, ready, I'm gonna start.
Are we on?
Lovely Joan Collins.
Dame Joan
Collins, everybody!
Okay, listen up.
I've been around for a
while, and you know what?
It's tough.
I was in Hollywood in what
is called the Golden Age,
and believe me, it wasn't
all chauffeurs and champagne.
Although, along with
my famous alter ego,
Alexis in "Dynasty," I've
had my share of both.
They used to say that female
stars were finished at 27,
but here I am, after seven
decades in the business,
to tell you a thing or two
about how to survive the
perils of the profession,
and what it really feels
like to get what you want.
So this is my story, and
I'm going to tell it my way.
So, right, what are we
gonna call this film?
I was thinking I should
start with Hollywood,
or maybe Mummy and Daddy.
You know what?
I'm just gonna start with me.
It's hard to believe, I know,
but when I started
out in this business,
I wasn't at all
interested in stardom.
I didn't want to be a star,
I had no intention of
wanting to be a star,
I wanted to be an actress
on the stage in England.
Let him approach.
Now, my game plan was
to go to drama school,
graduate to the West End,
and eventually become
a serious actress
of the British theatre.
Exactly how many years have
you been in this business?
Well, I'll tell you,
I actually made my
first tottering steps
onto the stage at
the age of three.
I retired for a bit,
went to nursery school,
then resumed my training
with Grandma Hetty.
Here's Grandma Hetty,
I love this picture.
It says Miss Hetty
Collins, comedy and dance,
and she's doing the splits
and she taught me
to do the splits
when I was about three or four.
Here she is, where she
loves to be, behind the bar,
and she liked a bit
of a bevvy, she did.
This is a picture of
my Auntie Pauline,
you think that Playboy
was risque, look at that.
And that's where I
inherited it from, maybe.
Here is Daddy.
This is when he was
a hotshot agent.
He was very good looking.
Daddy ran a highly
successful theatrical agency
in the West End.
They were mostly
vaudeville artists,
and it was a virtual
job centre for singers,
acrobats, ventriloquists
and jugglers.
"This Is Your Life,"
this very afternoon
at Heathrow Airport,
from Hollywood,
a glamorous, controversial,
gossip writers' dream
of a film star arrives.
Why was I always controversial?
What did I do that
was so controversial?
Just had a few boyfriends,
got married a few times.
Oh, hi you, happy birthday!
-Joan-
-What are you doing here?
I know you crossed the Atlantic
especially to be with
your dad for his birthday.
Oh God!
But he's got a surprise
for you, and so have I.
Joan Collins, tonight,
"This Is Your Life."
I can't believe this!
You're joking!
I, you didn't?
Joan Collins star of
more than 50 films,
and roles from good
time girl to a nun,
from chorus girl
to Regency lady.
You were born at the family
home in London's Maida Vale.
I was born
sometime between the end
of the Great Depression and
the beginning of World War II.
"Any woman who would reveal
her age would reveal anything,"
thus said Oscar Wilde,
and I agree with him.
Not many young men
have to work as hard as Tony,
but then not many bosses
are like Fontaine.
I attempted to shave
a few years off my age
when I was promoting "The Stud."
It's an emergency.
However, the Daily Mirror
dug up my birth certificate.
Joan Collins lies about her age!
Oh God, you'd think I'd
murdered a convent full of nuns.
The reason that actresses
lie about their age,
and believe me,
I am not the only actress
who has ever done it,
as you can tell,
is because of agents,
producers and directors.
So you do it purely to
survive in the business,
you do not do it from any
point of view of vanity.
I hadn't seen this book
for a hundred years,
but let me see if a
nice picture of Mummy.
Oh yeah, there's loads
of pictures of her,
with Jackie and me.
-Yeah.
-Yeah, she looks lovely.
She was a wonderful mother,
she was very kind, very caring,
the perfect woman really.
My father was the dominant
male figure, whose word was law
and my mother was the sweet,
beautiful, pleasing woman
and he was the boss.
And she was so busy trying
to please him all the time,
and I hated that, I hated that.
I vowed, my God,
I'm not gonna have to depend
on a man for everything,
I have to have my own identity.
I can't pinpoint exactly
when I stopped being
Daddy's little darling,
it could have been when
little baby Jackie arrived.
London inferno.
It could
have been the war,
when we were speedily
packed off to Brighton.
Warning, devastation
in a Britain under siege.
At the height of the
Blitz we moved back to London,
probably because Mummy didn't
want to leave Daddy alone.
By now, he was
37, very handsome,
and no doubt catnip to the
actresses and chorus girls
who surrounded him.
The
German Armed Forces
have been utterly defeated.
Then, miraculously,
the war was over.
One day I came home from school
and sitting in the hall was
one of the most handsome men
I'd ever seen.
"How do you do?
You must be Joan,
I'm Roger Moore."
"Daddy, I've just got to
be an actress," I said.
He didn't want me
to be in showbiz
because he knew the pitfalls.
You know, you'll be
finished before you're 23,
and the men are so predatory.
He knew before the 'Me Too'
movement, how they were.
My father also gave me some
very good advice about showbiz,
he said that it's really
the toughest profession
that you can go into,
that it is dog-eat-dog.
Nothing if not stubborn,
I persuaded him that
it was my true calling,
and just like
Alexis, I got my way.
Now you
say you were trained,
that was in England?
Yes.
Where did
you do your training?
At the Royal Academy
of Dramatic Art.
Ah,
well that's considered
the outstanding
school, isn't it?
Yes, I suppose it is.
Mummy walked me to
RADA on my first day.
"Are you nervous, darling?"
"No, not at all," I lied.
"Let's face it, Mummy,
I do have a show
business background."
Let's turn to the
organs of articulation,
your tongue and your lips.
I simply loved being at RADA,
and we studied every
aspect of our craft.
Fencing, voice projection,
expressive dancing.
I remember one of the end
of term reports that I got.
What kind of an accent is that?
And it said, Miss Collins
has certainly some talent
and is a very attractive girl,
but if she doesn't
watch her projection,
it'll be the films for her
and that would be such a pity.
Oh yeah, I'm trying
to be American.
Whilst at RADA, I moonlighted
as a teenage photo model.
Then suddenly, an
agent saw my pictures
and persuaded me,
reluctantly, to go into films.
Girls, please.
My first film
was a little epic
in which I had one line
as a beauty contestant.
This was followed
by what would become
my teenage delinquent roles.
The head of RADA was appalled.
"You simply cannot
go into films!
They're just attractive faces
and none of them can act."
But the film was offering me
a 300 pound a week salary.
I called my agent.
"You're going to have to give
up RADA, Joanie," he said.
And I did.
It was sad, but it was the
best decision I ever made.
"I Believe in You" gave
me my first proper role.
Celia Johnson played
my probation officer.
She's an old cow.
That's rather
childish, isn't it?
And then there
was Laurence Harvey.
Larry epitomised a lifestyle
to which I knew I would
eventually become accustomed.
Luxurious life, the
fine restaurants,
international travel,
gorgeous clothes and
sophisticated parties.
"I'm going to educate
you, little girl,"
he said sipping
a vintage claret.
I only wish he'd warned
me about Maxwell Reed,
the swashbuckling actor to
whom he had introduced me.
Hey, Gilliatt!
You dirty pirate thief!
Maxwell Reed was a
very handsome film star.
When I was at school,
I would stick pictures
of all my favourite idols
under my desk, Danny Kaye,
Gene Kelly and Maxwell Reed.
Well, my friend, the
more I see of this girl,
the better I like her.
He asked me out, I
instantly accepted.
A gigantic powder blue Buick
drew up outside
Bayswater tube station.
"Hi baby, how's it going?"
He had an American accent,
which was quite odd for
a man from South London.
He was 33, I was
17 and a virgin,
I knew that this would
cause trouble at home.
Oh God, do we really
have to have this bit in?
-Is it-
-I think we do.
Okay, let's go on.
"Where are we going?"
"You'll see, baby,
it'll be a surprise."
And it was.
In those days,
my mother would've said
I was taken advantage of,
now we call it date rape.
When she was young,
Joan Collins went out with a man
who beat, drugged and raped her.
How did she get even?
She married him.
Had I not been so innocent
about men and about sex
and about the way
things should be,
I wouldn't have done that,
but I had this strong long
sense of guilt, so I did it.
The honeymoon was a fiasco,
outwardly we looked happy,
but I was miserable.
I didn't know about sex,
and nobody knew about sex
because it wasn't
as freely available,
you didn't see on Page Three
of your popular newspapers.
I'd never even seen a
girl without her clothes,
let alone a man.
Now you can clean
all those awkward places.
That dust catching gap between
the carpet and the wall,
those dark depths down
the back of the chairs.
"I shall do no
cleaning or shopping,"
I announced grandly
to the Daily Mirror.
And I got hate mail from
women all over England.
"How dare you?"
"You're not a proper woman,"
"You don't like
cooking and cleaning?"
I said, "No, I don't like
cooking and cleaning."
Well, this is certainly
a very great honour
to be chosen this year, Miss
Press Clippings of 1952.
The award
was given to the star
who has had the
year's best publicity
heaped upon her shoulder.
Quiet on set,
camera rolling.
The J. Arthur Rank Organisation
was the most powerful
film company in Britain,
and I was being
groomed for stardom.
So this book is the book that
Jackie, my sister, kept of me,
and she kept all
my press clippings
and this is one of the
first ones, August, 1951.
It says "You'll be
seeing more of her."
Even then I was cast in
the more feisty roles.
Call yourselves men!
You're nothing but a
bunch of stupid kids
that can't be trusted.
Well, I've been doing some
thinking since last night,
and from now on I'm in charge.
These are all when
I was 16, 17, 18.
"Delightful Delinquent."
So, with Joan
wearing all the nice things
the press said about her,
husband Maxwell Reed took his
lovely film star wife home.
But as I was becoming hot,
Max was becoming cold.
"Meet Sheikh Abdul
Ben Kafir," said Max.
We were in Les Ambassadeurs,
a terribly chic
nightclub in Mayfair.
Max had a habit of gravitating
towards rich elderly men
and I was starting
to get a vague idea
of what this was all about.
"He'll pay you 10,000
pounds for one night
and I can even watch."
"I beg your pardon?
Are you seriously
suggesting that I go to bed
with that disgusting
old man for money?"
"One night, baby, that's all."
I looked at my handsome,
loathsome husband
and began to cry.
"Never in a million years!"
My life was not going
according to plan,
I went home to Mummy.
My first marriage I really
don't think I should count
because I was only
17 and it was,
had I been more worldly wise,
I would not have married.
I look at myself as I was
and I think that is not me.
Mr. Halsey, you are
your wife agent wanted
on the telephone.
After making several
successful British movies,
including this one, I
received a call from my agent.
"Howard Hawks is making
the Warner Brothers film,
"Land of the Pharaohs" in
Rome, and he wants you."
This was my lucky
break and I knew it,
because this was an epic movie.
Egypt,
50 centuries ago.
Within three weeks, I
was whisked off to Rome
to play the evil
Princess Nellifer.
Don't ever do that again!
Just how legendary
director Howard Hawks
became involved with this
one is a mystery to me.
However, this lavish costume
drama is now a cult movie.
Look at me, Treneh.
I'm afraid to.
Sydney Chaplin,
son of the Charlie,
played my lover on the
screen and in real life.
La dolce vita was in full swing.
Syd had a nippy sports car,
and I adored the velocity
and implicit danger
in those mad drives.
I'm rather partial
to living in Rome.
I thought it was
just marvellous.
At 20, you think
you're immortal,
nothing was to be
taken seriously
and after my life of
torment with Maxwell Reed,
that was okay by me.
"$350 a week, what do you
think of that, Joanie?"
20th Century Fox was
offering me a contract,
but I was not about
to sell myself short.
"It's not enough, John,
I want 1,250 or I'll just be
another cheap contract girl."
Believe it or not,
Fox accepted my terms,
but they wanted me in
California immediately.
Amidst tears and laughter,
I hugged Mummy and Daddy,
Jackie and my new
little brother, Bill,
I was going to start a
new life in Hollywood.
259, take one.
I arrived in Tinseltown
at the end of the
Golden Age of cinema
when the gold was just
beginning to tarnish.
I became part of the last
wave of the contract system,
when actors were
signed to studios.
Robert Wagner, Kim
Novak, Jayne Mansfield.
And introducing
Hollywood's most exciting new
personality, Joan Collins.
And now little old me.
You went to these parties
and you saw Lana Turner
and Rita Hayworth and
Clark Gable and Cary Grant,
all looking just as
good, if not better,
than they did on the screen.
I met Joan Crawford
once, who's terrifying,
and not beautiful at all.
I will never forget seeing
the dangerously gorgeous
Ava Gardner.
She was having a screaming
argument with her date.
She looked entrancing
and powerful,
like a jungle cat fiercely
protecting her territory,
the barefoot contessa.
Years later, this
image came back to me
when I was thinking
about how to play Alexis,
but that's for later.
In Hollywood, I was still
on the nursery slopes.
I was a scruffy
little kid from London
with sort of blue jeans
and polo neck sweaters,
and they had to groom
and glamorise me,
which they did to a tee.
The studio did
everything in its power
to protect us from scandal.
No hint of
drunkenness, adultery,
or heaven forbid, homosexuality,
ever made the newspapers.
Hollywood was in the business
of selling beautiful dreams.
The outfits the stars
wore on the screen
were as important, if not more,
than the films themselves.
I wonder where the
mystique has gone now,
I wonder where
the glamor's gone.
This is a very prized
possession, it weighs a tonne.
This is my childhood scrapbook.
I loved movies, I love films,
so I started keeping
the scrapbooks
with all my favourite stars in.
They certainly were
glamorous in those days.
Look at these pictures,
I mean, Hedy Lamarr,
absolutely ravishing.
They were all beautiful.
Oh, Richard Widmark.
All of the girls at school,
we got a tremendous crush on
Richard Widmark, very sinister.
I adored Jean Simmons, I thought
she was just so wonderful,
she was the one I really
wanted to look like.
I didn't know when I was
cutting all these pictures out
that many, many of these people,
I would either work with,
I mean, for example, Gene Kelly.
Bob Hope I loved, I
got to work with him.
Joan Fontaine, well, I worked
with her a couple of times.
When she is making
pictures in California,
Joan Collins enjoys this
view from her small house,
perched high in the hills
overlooking Hollywood.
Hello Joan.
Hello Charles.
Soon after arriving
in Hollywood,
I went to a party
and I met three of the
most brilliant actors
of the 20th century,
Marlon Brando, James
Dean and Paul Newman,
all sitting together on one
sofa, the method actors.
Hey, Stella!
The method, well,
what is the method?
Flawed,
troubled, anti-heroes.
Marlon's brooding sensual
looks mesmerised everyone.
"It's a bums life,
means nothing,
acting is fundamentally
a childish thing to do."
I asked him why, if he hated
acting so much, he made movies.
He smiled, "Money, doll, money."
Now I was 21 and I was in my
first big Hollywood movie,
"The Virgin Queen,"
starring the utterly
terrifying Bette Davis.
Your Majesty.
Bette played
Queen Elizabeth I,
I played one of
her hand maidens.
Take care how you treat
your queen's possessions,
Mistress Throckmorton.
I'm sorry, ma'am.
Bette didn't particularly
like young actresses,
in real life or on screen.
Take this strumpet away!
Take her away!
"Don't they
teach you anything
at those English drama
schools, you little fool?"
She snarled between takes.
By now, the studio was pulling
out all the stops with me,
and I was caught up
in the merry-go-round
of being made into a star.
And in 1955 I was cast in "The
Girl in the Red Velvet Swing"
with Ray Milland.
I didn't mean it to be
that sort of a kiss.
I didn't either.
I loved making
this fabulous film,
although the costumes,
gorgeous to look at,
were agony to wear.
The hats were secured
with lethal pins,
the collars had
little bones in them,
so if I moved my head too much,
I would get stabbed
in the throat.
Goodbye, all of you.
Despite the stunning costumes
and the good reviews for me,
the film didn't do well at
the box office, c'est la vie.
But I was learning my craft
and I loved everything
about Hollywood.
This young
star has been described
by a Hollywood chief as
the greatest screen asset
America has imported
from Britain.
Since she began work there,
she has climbed rapidly to
stardom, and in doing so,
has acquired a full measure of
transatlantic sophistication.
Bob, your impressions
of Hollywood, please.
Did you see Joan Collins
while you were there?
I met Joan Collins while
I was there earlier, yes.
To me, she seemed
quite American,
I mean, she had been
given an American accent
and she talked with a very
strong American accent
and American phrases.
She seemed to me to have lost
a specific English quality
that she had over here.
You must remember,
when a girl like Joan
goes over to Hollywood,
they're given enormous training
when they're under
contract with a studio,
but they're also given an
accent and a tone of speech
that makes them suitable
to American audiences.
Now, the name Darryl F. Zanuck
is probably familiar
to most of you,
for he is one of the
most remarkable figures
in the film industry today.
Hi, Mr. Zanuck.
Good to see you.
Darryl Zanuck, the head of Fox,
was one of the
first studio bosses
to have his own steam room
connected to his office.
I'd heard all the
rumours about Zanuck.
Not long after I arrived,
he chased me along a corridor
and trapped me against a wall,
he pinned me like a
beetle to a board.
"You need a real man,
honey, a real man."
God, he was actually
giving me the oldest line
in the business.
Luckily, a makeup man
came down the corridor
and I was able to escape.
Basically, I'm a
survivor, I have survived,
I have survived
being a young female
in a business when practically
all the men were predators.
My father used to say,
"Just give them a knee
in the you-know-what."
Joan,
do most of the people
whom you do see out here, are
they in motion pictures too?
Well, I think that everybody
that lives in Los Angeles,
practically, that I meet is
connected in some way or another
with motion pictures.
One night at a party
at Gene Kelly's house,
I siddled up to the bar
and I sat next to a
rather nondescript blonde
who was sitting by herself.
"Hi, I'm Marilyn," she said.
"Hi, I'm Joan."
Yes, it was she, the
biggest star in the world.
She was the first girl that
I'd ever seen walking around,
this is like the mid
fifties, without a bra,
in a woollen dress, very
daring in those days.
And she was just
sitting quite quietly.
I studied Marilyn Monroe in awe,
her face, almost devoid of
makeup, seemed ordinary.
It was hard to believe
she was not only the
biggest star in the world,
but in retrospect, the greatest
sex goddess of the century.
We chatted.
"Don't let the studio big guys
dictate to you," she warned.
"You're just a piece of
meat to them, we all are.
The Fox bosses are
the most dangerous."
"What do you mean?"
I ask naively.
"Wolves," mouthed Marilyn,
looking nervously
over her shoulder
as if expecting one to jump
out from behind a sofa.
"Look out for Zanuck,"
she whispered.
"Do you know what
everybody said about me
in my first year at Fox?"
I was spellbound.
"They said I was handed around
guys like hors d'oeuvres,
all of them, can
you believe it?"
I starred at her, she
gave me her gorgeous smile
and then I understood why
the world was so bedazzled
by Marilyn Monroe.
We had another drink and
I watched her shimmy away.
I never saw Marilyn
Monroe again,
but when I was in Rome in 1962
and I heard the
news of her death,
I must say I wept for her
and for all of her pain.
After a year at Fox,
I was loaned out to MGM
for "The Opposite Sex."
And there I was in a
bathtub covered in suds
when a server walked up and
slapped me with a subpoena.
Maxwell Reed, that
swashbuckling pirate, was back,
demanding $1,250 a
month in support.
"He discovered me,"
he said, what a liar!
And just like the pirate in
one of his cheesy movies,
he demanded I hand over the
money he said he deserved.
You know, it's a funny
thing how much I like money,
and a pretty woman.
That divorce cost
me over $10,000.
I had to pay Max's legal fees
and give him all the
money in my bank account.
I never heard of a woman
being sued for alimony before.
And here was Maxwell Reed
who, when I divorced him,
I tore out most
of these pictures
'cause I didn't want
to see them anymore.
With my sister, Jackie, I
left the courtroom aged 23,
poorer, wiser and with a
growing distrust of all men
and that was divorce number one.
Although women's liberation
was not yet upon us,
I have always considered
myself to be an early model
of an emancipated woman.
I've always considered myself
to be an early feminist,
feminist, yes, much better
than emancipated woman.
I made my own money and
I lived by my own rules.
So after my divorce, I
lived with several men.
And after my divorce, after my
divorce, I did what I liked,
I did what I liked.
Is that
because several men
sounds like several men
all at once, that's why-
Yes, which was
not true.
No, no.
I was, I was a
serial monogamist,
if you know what I mean.
Always true to one man,
and one after another.
By 1958, I had already
appeared in several movies
with some of the most attractive
male stars in Hollywood,
Paul Newman being one of them.
I think I can be very
funny, she said modestly.
Gregory Peck was the most
elegant leading man of all.
Go after them, Jim,
and catch them.
Get them, kill them,
kill them, kill them!
In contrast to his shivery
was the Neanderthal
Richard Burton,
I played opposite
him in "Sea Wife."
This is one of the
most stirring stories
of our time.
A film about a nun
wrecked on a desert island
with three men.
All this time, I've been
so near you, all this time.
We had onscreen chemistry,
but then he made the obligatory
pass as most actors do
and charmingly admitted to me
he would bonk a snake if it
was wearing a skirt, wow!
On the lot I
found Richard Burton,
Joan Collins and their
director, Bob McNaught,
taking a tea break.
Joan plays the
unusual part of a nun,
something quite new for her.
I'd admired Burton for years,
he was another one of my
school girl autographs,
"Dear Ms. Collins, thank
you for your letter,
best wishes, Richard Burton."
I've given my word
to someone else.
And here I was acting
opposite this paragon,
the great Richard Burton
was a scalp collector,
but no way was I tempted.
Although I saw many
other women fall
like nine pins at his feet.
He was a bit of a wolf,
he was known to be
a bit of a wolf.
I'm surprised
Elizabeth married him.
Don't you love me?
Don't you want Egypt?
Don't you want the world?
I spent early 1959
testing to play Cleopatra
in Fox's big blockbuster.
If you were a king, your
son would reign after you.
I have no son.
Then get one.
Naturally, the casting
couch reared its ugly head.
The chairman at Fox made it
clear that he had a lot to say
when it came to casting,
"He should know better,"
I thought as I skipped
out of his clutches.
If you slept with the producer,
you could have been Cleopatra.
If I slept with a producer,
I could have played
any part I wanted to
at 20th Century Fox,
those were the days!
But I didn't, I prefer to
sleep with younger men.
So I didn't get
the Cleopatra part
and I was drowning
my sorrows one night
when I became aware of a
young man staring at me
"That Shirley McLean's kid
brother, Warren," said my agent
and the next day the phone
rang and it was Warren.
"Do you wanna have dinner
with me tonight?" He said.
When
you first meet him,
I think you are 23 and he's 22
and you're famous
and he's not famous.
"He's not famous, he's
broke and he's got spots!"
said my best friend,
Cappie Badrutt,
but I wasn't bothered by
a man not having money,
in fact, I preferred it
as I believe that if a
man could buy anything,
it usually meant he thought
it could buy me too.
I liked Warren Beatty,
I liked his humour,
his conversation and
his physical packaging.
You said he had to
ring you 80 times a day.
Oh, I didn't say 80, 60 maybe.
I'd heard that men were
at their sexual peak
between the ages of 17 and 23
and if Warren was anything
to go by, this was true.
I got a lot of flack from
the studio and also from-
Because of the publicity?
No, because it was shocking,
people didn't live together.
No they didn't.
They just did not do that.
While I was living with Warren,
I was also learning to strip
for the movie "Seven Thieves."
And I was lucky enough to have
the best stripper in America
as my coach.
Candy Bar taught me
more about sensuality
than I'd learned in all
my years under contract.
At the same time I was
doing "Seven Thieves,"
I was craming in wardrobe
tests for "Sons and Lovers,"
which was about to
shoot in England.
"Don't go butterfly, don't
leave your bee!" begged Warren.
What is your biggest
career mistake?
Turning down a movie
called "Sons and Lovers"
that I was asked to do
when I was under contract
to do Fox and turning it down
'cause I was going out with
Warren then and he said,
"No, the script stinks." And
Mary Ure won the Oscar for it.
"I think we should get
engaged," said Warren.
So within a week, the columnists
announced our engagement.
Was that a really happy time,
that time with Warren Beatty?
It was happy, it was sad,
it had a lot of ups
and downs, actually.
Warren was insecure
and argumentative,
so he and I made a
volatile combination.
Unfortunately I see the
person who I'm in love with
at the time through rose
coloured spectacles,
it's very, very childish
and naive and stupid,
I'm not like that
anymore, obviously.
We argued so much that our last
few months were a hazy blur
and I knew that marriage
wasn't going to be the answer.
I accepted a film in London
playing opposite Bob
Hope and Bing Crosby.
"It's crap!" said, Warren,
"Why do you need to do it?"
Two reasons, for the money
and to get away from you.
So that was the end of our
relationship and we knew it.
There's
"Violent Love" with Alice
who clung like a Tigress
to the man every
other woman wanted.
But by now my career
was stagnating,
I was a utility infielder
starring in run
of the mill films
and if Fox couldn't get Susan
Hayward or Jean Tierney,
they got me.
In "Road to Hong Kong,"
I put on the correct
loving expression,
to gaze into Bing
Crosby's bland blue eyes
and smell his tobacco breath
and wondered how
people could ever think
that an actress's life
was a bowl of cherries.
I'd now passed my
first quarter century,
an age that young actresses
had learned to dread
ever since the studios
had decreed that 27
was the end of beauty.
Because people think that
if you're good looking,
there's a tendency for there
not to be too much up here,
it is again, more difficult
to be taken seriously.
Again, I hate that phrase,
why does it keep on coming up.
Like to be regarded,
let me ask you that.
Oh, all different ways.
And as the 1960s
began to flower,
I began to think seriously
about what I wanted to do
with the rest of my life.
I asked Fox for an early
release from my contract.
What are the
future plans for Joan Collins?
Well.
Anthony Newley was a pop star,
a writer and the of English theatre.
Where'd you meet Tony?
Backstage, wasn't it
from "Stop the World?"
Yes, I went to see
"Stop the World,"
which was then the sort
of greatest play in London
with Robert Wagner who had just
broken up with Natalie Wood
and I had just broken
up with Warren Beatty
and Natalie and Warren
were seeing each other
and Bob Wagner and I
were seeing each other.
We went to see the play
and I was absolutely
fascinated with Tony,
he was so wonderful.
I was trying to remember
where I'd seen him before
then it came to me,
he had played the Artful Dodger
in David Lean's "Oliver Twist."
Now here he was in his twenties,
satanic and intense looking.
We went backstage to meet him.
"He loves the ladies," my
friend Joyce Blair had told me,
"He's just never been
able to fall in love!"
"A man who has never
been in love," I thought,
"How sad, how challenging."
Three weeks later
we were lovers.
Tony was brilliant,
funny as hell
but underneath raged a
deep distrust of women
but I didn't know that yet.
"What can a rich,
beautiful film star
see in a cockney half-
Jewish git like me?" he said,
"I'm half Jewish
too." I replied,
"From Maida Vale via
Sunset Boulevard."
I said, "This will be the
father of my children,
he is so wonderful!"
After a year and a
half we got married
and my gorgeous daughter
Tara was born in 1963.
Motherhood was really exciting
and I love every minute of it.
London, Polish-born
director Roman Polanski,
Sharon Tate made
for the Playboy club
and a star studded reception.
Joan Collins and Anthony Newley.
The Tony Newley's got the
star set really shaking.
It was the 1960s, the
time of the English actor.
Michael Kane, Albert Finney,
Peter Sellers, Terrence Stamp
and now, Anthony Newley,
they were all taking
America by storm.
Suddenly, anything and anyone
British had enormous appeal.
Now Tony's career was
taking off big time.
In 1965, my beautiful
son Alexander was born,
then we bought a house in LA
and we parted furiously
with our showbiz friends.
Paul Newman, Sammy Davis Jr,
Natalie Wood, Julie Andrews
and of course my sister, Jackie.
And guess what?
I decided to retire.
When I married Tony,
I gave it all up,
that was it, goodbye career,
hello babies and cooking.
As far as America was concerned,
I was now totally unknown.
Is the male member
of this duo English?
Yeah.
Oh, are you Mr. and
Mrs. Tony Newley?
"Oh, that's Anthony
Newley's wife,
didn't she used
to be an actress?"
Enter the wonderful
world of "Doctor Dolittle."
Tony began rehearsing
for his new role
in "Doctor Dolittle," with
the pompus Rex Harrison.
Tony was totally
wrapped up in his work
and although he told me
he loved, I was dubious,
he was hardly ever at home.
The beautiful house
complete with pool
and two gorgeous children
couldn't make up for
the emptiness I was
beginning to feel,
especially when the
children started school.
Why wasn't I content like
most Beverly Hills housewives
to be a perfect wife, to lie
by the pool and ruin my skin
then go to the
dermatologist to repair it?
To go to the analyst,
the hen parties, the gym?
Women pulled and tucked but
everyone looked the same.
Why was I so discontented?
And it was then I
suppose that I thought
"I'm not going to live
another 50 or 60 years
and not have a career
because I can see now my
children at nursery school,
they've left me more or less
for five or six or seven hours
during the day,
what am I going to
do with my life?
Am I gonna sit here and
wash some man's socks?
No, thank you very much.
I wanted to work,
lights, camera action,
it was in my blood
and I missed it.
So I worked in television.
I had been a star, I'd been
a pretty big star in America
for three or four years, not
big like today, but big-ish
and I realised that I like that,
I realised that I needed that,
to do what was inside me, Joan,
which is to say, I like
acting, I want to act.
The new generation of
actresses were on the scene,
Julie Christie, Ali
MacGraw, Faye Dunaway.
That's Bonnie,
Faye Dunaway,
that's Clyde, Warren Beatty.
Warren Beatty was on the
crest of superstardom.
As well as becoming
the most famous stud
in the Western hemisphere.
I was raising my children,
I was living in California,
which I still do,
I was working in
episodic television.
However, looking back I was
in some pretty big shows,
The Man from Uncle,"
"The Virginia,"
"Batman" and "Star Trek."
Excuse us, miss,
we didn't mean to trespass,
it's cold outside.
A lie is a very poor
way to say hello.
In "Star Trek,"
I played a saintly
mission worker
who tries to prove to the world
that Hitler was a nice guy,
so Dr. Spock allows her
to be run over by a truck.
And what do you know?
It became one of the
most popular "Star
Trek" episodes ever.
At home though, storm
clouds were gathering,
Tony and I gazed
sombrely at each other
across our Wedgewood
dinner service,
the content act and
the communication
just wasn't there anymore,
we were fast drifting part.
"Would you like to dance?"
Ryan O'Neal sat there
looking arrogant and nervous
at the same time,
but he was the first
man I'd found attractive
for a long time.
"Sure!" I said.
I was guesting on a
TV show at Universal
when he showed up on the set,
"What're you doing tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow's my
birthday," I said,
"And Tony's coming
back from New York."
"I'll call and wish you
a happy birthday then."
Tony didn't make it
back for my birthday,
he just sent a bunch of flowers
but suddenly I
decided what I wanted.
A girl should get what she
wants on her birthday, so I did.
I believe very strongly
in being true to the
person that you are with,
I really do believe in that.
You never cheated?
No, I don't, no,
only, yes, in one instance
that was with Ryan O'Neal,
if you're gonna
cheat on somebody,
cheat with Ryan O'Neal.
Of course.
Right?
It was 1968, Sammy
Davis, Jr., Paul Newman,
Tony and I invested
in the disco business,
it was called The Factory,
everyone was there, proving
what I have always suspected,
that stars would rather
be around other stars
than anyone else.
One night, Robert Kennedy
showed up oozing charm
and sex appeal and
he asked me to dance.
"Why don't you come to
New York next weekend?
I'd really like
to see you again."
Now this was opening
a Pandora's box
into which even I
wasn't prepared to peep.
"Thanks, Bobby, I'd just
love to, but I just can't,
maybe a rain check?"
He gave me a long,
penetrating look,
"You got it, I'll be waiting."
Six months later, I thought
sadly about that rain check.
I was in Malta
when I heard about Robert
Kennedy's assassination,
I was on a film set.
Tony was now achieving
his life's desire
to write, direct and star
in an erotic avant
garde musical-comedy
based entirely on himself.
My wife doesn't understand me.
"Can Heironymus Merkin
Ever Forget Mercy Humppe
and Fine True Happiness?"
was a felinious movie about
a successful actor/director,
that is to say, Tony,
who's torn between new
wild blonde Mercy Humppe
And raven-haired Polyester
Poontang, that's me.
I had a horrible
feeling that Tony
was spelling out the
death of our marriage.
You were
directed by your husband,
Anthony Newley,
what was that like?
That was interesting.
He didn't have too much
time for me, actually,
he was very busy with the
rest of the female cast.
Oh my God!
I never saw that!
I realised he'd
been having affairs
from the moment we married
and now he was
blatantly making a movie
about all the women he'd bedded.
Oh.
I was shattered.
Well I've had enough,
I'm taking the children,
I'm taking them back to
Europe, anywhere away from you.
And this time, I mean
it, I really do mean it!
Exit Polyester-Joan
sobbing hysterically.
The film was universally panned
and when I finally saw it,
I knew there was no
hope for my marriage.
It's never been my style
to stay on a sinking ship,
I left for London
with my children.
I divorced my second husband
because I was not gonna
spend the rest of my life
being married to man who
was unfaithful to me,
it was as simple as that.
I'm telling him this because
it's the absolute truth.
Whatever I was and then
here's this man being
unfaithful to me,
am I gonna take this
for the rest of my life?
What's it gonna be like
when I'm, you know, 45?
No.
You say that
his problem was,
he was never gonna
commit fully to marriage.
I mean, you sort of knew
that from the beginning,
so it was gonna, did you not-
I didn't realise, no, no.
he he'd said he was, he had
thought that maybe he couldn't,
but then once we got married,
once we had the family,
then he was committed.
And I think that as he became
more famous in America,
and then he became a star,
he became a different person.
He strayed and he
strayed big time
and it all came out in that
movie, that fucking movie,
oh my God, what a disaster!
My marriage to Tony
had lasted seven years,
the split was amicable,
painful, hurtful, but amicable.
This man in the speed
boat is Ron Kass.
He was an attractive,
tall American
with amazing green eyes
and an endearing smile.
And he was the president
of Apple Records,
the Beatles recording company.
Ron knew what he wanted
and he usually got it,
and what he wanted was me.
We spent time
discovering each other
and the more I discovered,
the more I liked.
When you first meet a man,
what is more likely to
make him attractive to you?
His eyes, his voice,
or his physique?
I'll say physique.
You'll
say the physique?
Yeah.
Well, I mean, you can have
great eyes and a great voice,
but if you ain't got the
bod, you ain't got nothin'.
Yeah, that's
what the Mrs. Said,
the physique, you got it!
The following, you
Ron and I married.
Now Ron had three children
from his first marriage,
so we all moved into a lovely
family house in London.
It was exactly what I had
wanted, a warm family home
and soon after that, my
darling Katyana was born.
I was now in my mid thirties,
ancient by movie star standards
and I wasn't gonna sit around
waiting for the next script,
that would go to
Julie Christie anyway.
So, I started to
appear in horror films.
Molly?
These were the good years
and I even agreed to a
role in "The Persuaders"
with my old friend Roger Moore,
mainly because it was being
filmed on the French Riviera,
which I adore.
In England, life was perfect.
Then out of the blue,
Ron announced that
we had to upsticks
and move back to California,
I knew it was a bad idea.
Ron was about to head a
new film company in LA,
so with a heavy heart,
I said, bye, bye Britain
and moved back lock, stock
and Mercedes to LA again.
And then, sadly,
Ron lost his job.
I was now the sole breadwinner
of this rather large family.
I was working in television
and we didn't socialise
as much as we used to.
I told Ron that I really
wanted to move by to England,
LA wasn't good for our kids,
not to mention it was terrible
for my ego, Ron refused.
We were fighting a lot,
usually about money.
Would you accept it
and say a successful,
conventional marriage, that
the man should be the boss?
What'd you call a successful,
conventional marriage?
We managed to get by, I guest
starred on several TV shows,
including "Police Woman."
You mind if I smoke?
Yes, I do.
Well, it's too bad.
Police, freeze!
But that didn't
cut it financially,
not with six kids to support.
My friend, Samantha Egger,
with whom I'd worked
on "Starsky and Hutch,"
suggested that I apply
for unemployment benefit.
So, one sunny afternoon in 1976,
I reluctantly drove out to
the Department of Unemployment
in Santa Monica.
Then I'm saying that I'll
kill Samantha for this,
this was really the
wrong thing to do
and I finally got to
the head of the line
and the woman's looked at my
name and says "Joan Collins!"
And the whole of the room
looked around and she goes,
"What're you doing here?"
So she said "Fill out
this form, Ms. Collins."
and people coming up saying,
"Can I have your autograph?"
"Fill out this form and
come back next week."
I said, "You mean I
don't get the $180 now?"
She said, "No, next week."
So I said, "Thank
you very much,"
I took the form and
I never went back.
At this point, I hear
you probably ask,
"Why didn't they
just sell the house
and live a simple life?"
Well, since I hadn't lived a
simple life since I was 20,
I wasn't about to start
now and I needed a job
and what I got was
"Empire of The Ants."
This film was not going
to win any of us an Oscar.
in fact, it seemed
more of a certainty
that it would guarantee
that none of us would
ever work again,
I was the so-called
star of this epic.
And although we'd been
promised stunt doubles,
they hadn't arrived,
so four petrified actors
capsized into the filthy water.
Now Florida swamps are
infested with crocodiles,
snakes and all kinds of bugs.
I tried to keep my head
above the loathsome liquid
as snake like tentacles
attached themselves to my legs
and when I scrambled out, they
were bleeding from deep cuts.
A few days later, the
cuts began to fester.
"Terrific!" I thought,
not only have I possibly
wrecked my career
by doing this piece of drick,
but I probably contracted
some fatal disease
and will have to have
my legs amputated.
I looked and felt a wreck
and was never so delighted
as when the last day
of shooting arrived
and it was finally my turn by
some forgettable plot twist
to be asphyxiated by
the giant queen ant
and turned into a zombie.
And that, I am happy to say,
was my last horror film,
But that also became a cult.
Hello!
I promoted "Empire of The Ants"
at the Canne Film Festival.
At a lunch, I was seated next
with distributor of B films
in the UK.
"Would you be interested
in making a movie
from my sister Jackie's best
selling novel "The Stud?"
Okay, so let's rewind.
My sister, Jackie,
had just written a wonderful
book called "The Stud"
and there was a character in
it called Fontaine Khaled,
a glamorous socialite,
however, slightly
nymphomaniacal jet setter.
She originally came
to me and said,
could she have the book
because she thought it was
a wonderful part for her
and it is a wonderful
part for her.
Who knows about
the lights, please?
My career was going
slowly nowhere,
I was just doing horror films
and doing bits in
television in America
and I realised that I had
to put myself in a film
that was very
commercial otherwise,
I would probably
never work again.
So I asked Jackie if she
would write the script
and that I could then start
taking it to various producers
and to various people that
I knew to get it financed.
I had taken it around to
every producer I knew,
but no one was interested.
And here I was again at Canne,
offering my, by now,
slick opening pitch,
would this man sitting
next to me be interested?
"As a matter of fact, I would!"
said burley George Walker,
ex-boxer and now low
budget film producer.
"That's just the kind of
movie we're interested in!"
The search for an
actor to play the stud
became as close to the search
for Scarlett O'Hara
as we could make it.
Adam Faith and George
Best were mentioned,
even Tom Jones was,
who actually appeared
most anxious to play it.
Finally, we chose the darkly
brooding, sexy Oliver Tobias.
Why?
You'll reek of sex anyway,
it's your main attribute.
And within months, we
were in production.
I was going to star in the film
with the proviso I do
some tasteful nudity.
Yes, I could do that, this
was no longer the dark ages.
It's a nice coat, is it new?
This?
No, I've had it for hours.
Jesus!
I realised that if
you're gonna make a film
called "The Stud,"
you are copping out
if you are not showing scenes
in which you see a
certain amount of flesh.
That's right.
Tonight,
Ian Wooldridge talks to
film actress, Joan Collins.
Joan, you know as you sit there,
being who you are
and what you are
and looking, if I
may say so, gorgeous,
that millions of men would
love to jump into bed with you,
does that give you a
feeling of great power?
I bore the
brunt of sizzling fury
as though a woman over 40,
semi-nude was something
truly shocking.
You appear naked in the film.
Mm-hmm.
Some people might think this
was, you know, overexposure.
I think I'm right in saying
that that is the just about
the first British film
in which you really appeared
in a nude love scene.
Oh, I would say yes.
You, in fact, are a sex
symbol., you accept that?
Well, I think that's
just part of what I am.
Raquel Welsh always reckons
that you should show
the public just so much
but if you show a lot,
they lose interest.
I mean, did you have
any misgivings?-
Ah, shes such a great
philosopher, Raquel.
Not so hard, Sandro.
I didn't think I was committing
a crime by revealing my,
not-to-be-sneezed-at-body.
You see, I don't think
there's anything wrong
with being beautiful,
glamorous, well dressed,
well groomed or
sexually attractive.
If God was kind enough
to give you those things,
then I think you might
as well appreciate them
and not hide your light
under a bushel, as it were.
Do you think that people
now say when they meet you,
they mentally undress you, say?
Not if they've already seen it,
why should they
want to do it again?
This is the peg that
you are hung up on
and I'm not desperately
trying to escape it, you see?
I'm not saying "No,
no, I'm not that,
I will now wear my dowdy skirts
and I will take off my makeup
and scrape back my hair."
I'm not going to do it
because I like the way I am.
And I discovered that my
tag of sultry, sexy bitch
was one that the public loved
and actually believed in.
Don't drop it, will you, lover.
Let's begin with Joan Collins,
I once read that
she was considered
to be the main female
object of desire
in a survey of teenage boys.
In a poll of English men,
I was voted the sexiest woman
in the world that year, hoorah!
Certainly, the British
audiences loved it.
I mean, I know some people
who saw it 36 times,
I know some people who saw
it four and five times,
and I would say that it
would be very successful,
touch wood.
And it was.
Joan Collins,
Oliver Tobias, "The Stud."
"The Stud"
was a giant success,
the biggest money in
Britain at that time,
other than the Bond films,
so now I was a
household name again.
Oh, can't you smell
those Italian wines!
So fused with
herbs and spices
from four continents.
Oh, I'm being boring.
Oh, sorry!
I made a series of
commercials for Cinzano
with Leonard Rossiter.
Getting your head down, sweetie?
Jolly good idea.
And he was such a
brilliant comedian
that my main problem was to
stop shrieking with laughter.
From the
same stable as "The Stud"
now comes "The Bitch."
"The Bitch," I
never liked that title.
"The Bitch,"
another million plus investment
and another limousine ride to
a premier with Joan Collins.
Ms. Collins sweeps in to play
her very professional part
in the razzmatazz which will
get the film talked about
and sold to the public, no
matter what the critics say.
Then I've got a dream
deal with British Airways,
one commercial and free
travel for three years!
There's a sort of
Renaissance here,
I think the seventies
were a bad time
and I think that the eighties
are going to be tremendous,
I hope.
On August the first
1980, I flew to Paris,
the following day, the
unthinkable happened,
my daughter, Katy, had been
in a terrible accident.
Even now, it's hard for
me to talk about it.
Well, she was
knocked down by a car
and sustained very
serious brain injuries
and I was told that
she was going to die
and then she was in a
coma for a very long time.
You and your husband
got a mobile home
outside the hospital
and spent all this time
talking with her
and being with her.
Yes, the only way that I
was able to really cope
was by almost pretending
that it wasn't happening,
that it was like,
happening to somebody else.
Eventually she started
to make little sounds
and then she took her
first faltering steps.
She was going to be all right.
Katy's accident
was the worst thing
that ever happened to me.
I took Kay on
holiday to Marbella,
she still had a way to
go for complete recovery,
but she was thriving
in the sunshine.
I'd been begging Ron to
sell the house in LA,
we really needed the money.
Despite the success of
"The Stud" and "The Bitch,"
George Walker was
refusing to pay my share
of the video sales,
which were huge.
One day, my brother discovered
a tonne of unpaid bills
in Ron's desk and documents
that showed that we had a
huge mortgage on the house.
I flew to LA to find out that
our car had been impounded.
People were calling to be paid,
including our cleaning
lady and the gardener,
it was a nightmare.
And then the phone
rang, it was my agent.
"Joany, have you ever
heard of "Dynasty?""
"No, never, what's "Dynasty?""
"It's a bit like Dallas, they
want you, it's a great role,
her name is Alexis, she's a
bitch but brilliantly smart."
"Okay, I'll think
about it." so I did.
I mean, I'd never
heard of the show,
it hadn't played in England,
it was about sort of 35 or
45 on the ratings in America,
it wasn't terribly successful.
These opening credits
are still thrilling.
I never have actually wanted
to do a series particularly
and they had to sort of
twist my arm to do it
and a lot of the
reason why I did it
was because I felt that
being in California
for six months with Katy,
rather than being in
the English winter,
would be very beneficial.
That six months turned
into nine years.
I think that, you
know, like any role,
you're always the
second or third choice
and I think they wanted
Elizabeth Taylor or Sophia Loren
or Raquel Welch, I don't know,
there was a whole bunch people
that were mentioned
before me, but I got it.
Season two, episode one,
my first day of filming,
enter Alexis Carrington.
Would you state your
full name please?
Alexis Morell-Carrington.
And your residence?
Alexis is the mysterious
ex-wife of oil tycoon,
Blake Carrington,
who is on trial for the murder
of his son's homosexual lover,
Alexis is the surprise witness.
I was very young when I
married Mr. Carrington.
At first, it was a good
marriage in every sense,
we had an excellent
relationship.
But I knew it was me
that was really on trial.
Okay, here's this
actress from England,
now show us what you can do.
I'm glad to see that your
father had your teeth fixed,
if not your tongue.
I had convinced the producers
to let me play the stylish
Alexis as an English woman,
"Little America won't
understand you!" said my agent.
I be your pardon?
"Yes, they will!" I argued,
"I have perfect good diction!"
I'd like to please a phone
call to Paris, please.
Yes, the one in France.
I realised that Alexis could
be viewed as somewhat cliched,
but there was enough
humour in her lines
for me to build an
interesting character.
Nobody takes me to the cleaners
and to bed in the same day,
Mr. Dexter, good night.
So I go off to go in this series
and have become, in a
period of three months,
the most hated
woman on television.
Get out of my sight,
you miserable has been.
Of course, if you've seen
Joan Collins on that show,
you know who put the
nasty in "Dynasty," right?
What a dump.
And all these little
kids were waving at me
from a station waggon
and they were waving
and waving like that, they
were about seven or eight
and so I sort of waved
back and I said "Hello!"
They said "Hello,
Alexis, Alexis!
We hate you!"
Now listen to me,
you little tramp.
Did you ever say to them,
"This is lousy dialogue?"
Constantly!
Oh, that's all I
was ever saying.
I said, "How can I say this?"
And they said, "Well
rewrite it," so I did.
Yes, she's strong, she's
assertive and she's a big bitch
but that's okay.
"Being bad is good
business for Joan Collins."
Oh, Daddy saying,
"I'm so proud of my sexy,
superbitch daughter."
He would never have
said those words.
"Rise of the superbitch."
Oh yes, the superbitch.
I don't know made this
book, it's not my writing.
I think at one point I
had three secretaries.
A lot of the reason that women
admire her is that she says,
"This is what I'm going to do
and nothing's going to stop me
and if a man can do
it, I can do it."
And she thinks like a man
and so people call her a
bitch a lot of the time
and actually she's just
being very business like,
very assertive, very tough,
very strong and saying,
"I'm gonna do this!"
How do you get that
reputation of being a bitch?
I was kind of upset at first
when I first came to America
and everybody thought
that I was this
and then I just thought
there's nothing I can do,
take the money and run
and let them think
you're the biggest bitch
in kingdom come!
"Dynasty," which had been
languishing in the ratings,
began to climb to the top.
Oh, this is really a good one.
John Forsythe, of course,
always in the middle,
in his contract,
he always had to be in
the top or in the middle.
"At "Dynasty,"
"Dallas" shoot out,
panic on "Dallas" as
"Dynasty's" ratings soar."
I like that.
And that, my darling, is
how it should be done.
And that's Alexis for you,
steely but with panache.
When the producers realised
that fights between Alexis
and her arch enemy, Crystal,
played by Linda Evans
were ratings gold,
they'd concoct at
least two every season.
You miserable bitch!
In one, we had to
fall into a lily pond
and fight like demented frogs.
Linda was supposed to
sock me in the jaw,
but freeze before connecting
so the stunt double could
take over, but she let rip.
She had a right hook
like Mike Tyson.
"Gee, I'm so sorry!" she said.
This was my house
while you were living
in a shack somewhere.
Alexis, if you don't
go down those stairs
and out that door, I'll
throw you out myself!
I wouldn't want you to
exert yourself, my dear,
I'm leaving.
150 million people
tuned in each week
to watch us slug it out,
I went from being practically
unknown in America
to becoming one of the most
popular actresses in the world.
When you think of sexy
television vixens,
my first guest
immediately comes to mind.
And Joan Collins
joins us this morning
from Los Angeles,
good morning, Joan.
Well, hi.
The most talked about
lady in the world today.
We on?
And certainly one of
the most glamorous.
First off, I love you.
You're not so bad yourself.
Joan Collins was once called
a poor mans Elizabeth Taylor,
well no more.
Thank you boys,
I'll see you later.
One of the most talked about
women in the Western world.
Thank you.
Would you welcome Joan Collins.
It took her a
while to get there,
but ever since she
became Alexis Carrington,
Joan Collins has remained
one of the most commanding
presences on television.
Yes, Americans really
have been spending $10,000
for each of these
Joan Collins dolls.
I had the feeling I
might be a star again
when I was asked to take part
in "The Night of 100 Stars."
Backstage, my friend
Henry Winkler was filming.
There was so many
faces from my past,
I hadn't seen Betty Davis
since "The Virgin Queen"
and she was still
just as intimidating.
As we left, Roger
Moore patted my cheek,
"Fame at last, Joany."
Actress Joan Collins is the
latest star to be honoured
with a star on her own in
Hollywood's Walk of Fame.
In Germany, where it was
called "Der Denver-Clan."
I was known as Der Denver-Beast.
I'm the voice of Joan
Collins in "Denver Clan."
I'm very proud about it
because I think she's just
marvellous, she's great.
I was made into a wax work,
I turned on the Christmas
lights in Regent Street.
I've never seen
anything like this.
And best of all, I
won a Golden Globe.
Joan Collins.
This is a special award for me
because the last time
that I won an award
was for the most
promising actress of 1957,
so it's taken me a bit of time,
but I'm really happy
to have it, thank you.
It's a big kick, I have to
tell you, it's really a kick.
I mean, you were
huge, "Dynasty" was huge.
Well first of all,
it was the right show
for the right time,
it had beautiful
people, beautiful
clothes, beautiful sets,
real flowers, real caviar,
real anger behind the
scenes, from some of us.
The 1980s was the me decade.
The markets were trading bonds
with the bravado of Gordon Gekko
and the stock market
soared, obviously,
and people were making
lot, lot, lot of money
and investing it and
living the good life.
The 1980s was a great decade,
I don't care what
people say about it,
I don't care if they say it
was all greed and Gordon Gekko.
I love Gordon Gekko
and I miss it.
Joan knows how to make
money and ooh la la,
she knows how to spend it.
This house is a
house that I bought
just a year or two
after "Dynasty" started.
Well actress Joan Collins
is following the footsteps
of other top celebrities,
she has put her name on
a new line of perfume.
Something Scoundrel,
my favourite fragrance.
The Joan Collins
lingerie collection.
It was one long spending spree
and "Dynasty" echoed
it all on television.
Mr. President, how are you?
Very, very good Blake.
People clammered to be on
"Dynasty," even for a walk on.
Hi, hello.
Hello Alexis, it's
good to see you.
Good to see you, I haven't
seen since Portofino.
One day, the network received
a call from Donald Trump.
"I'd just love to have
a part on "Dynasty."
"Well, I'm afraid all
the roles are cast."
said the head of talent,
"But you don't understand,
I would be great as
one of Alexis' lovers."
The Alexis look
became the symbol
of the powerful eighties woman,
shoulder pads, couture and
lots and lots of bling.
Do you want to come in
and see me do my makeup?
Is that what you want?
During "The Stud," I
invented a makeup look
which I stuck to more
or less ever since,
big hair, smokey eyes
and bright lipstick.
So when "Dynasty" came along,
the Alexis look was already
in place, it was mine.
Right, done.
By now, my picture
had been on the cover
of practically every magazine,
I was on top of the world,
but I'd been at
that rodeo before.
I knew full well that
it wouldn't last.
Everybody thought
that, you know,
I had the world on a string
and that I was playing this,
you know, tough, hard,
calculating woman but in life,
I was pretty miserable.
It was hard to keep up the
facade of being happy with Ron,
my closest friends saw
the marriage crumbling,
even if I refused to acknowledge
it openly at the time.
I went to a marriage
counsellor at one time
when I was married to Ron
because I really didn't want to,
I didn't wanna have
another failure,
but it just really
prolongs the agony.
We eventually did split up.
You've
had three marriages,
you had a sense of what
love is in those marriages
or you haven't achieved
what the classic love is.
What is the classic love?
Well, you know-
Romeo and Juliet?
Romeo and
Juliet, you know, whatever,
but no-
Well, yeah, the classic love
that lasts for about a year.
Is there-
That's what they had, if that.
Do you think Romeo and Juliet
would've stayed happily
married for 10 years?
Even when she had to do the
dishes and raise the children,
you think that love
would've stayed the same?
Of course not!
It was 1983 and that same
year I posed for Playboy.
Oh!
My God!
These are filth!
Okay, so Playboy.
Incidentally, Playboy,
you wanna see Joan Collins
without any clothes on?
Oh no!
Well now Joan Collins
has created quite a stir
by appearing in a photo layout
for the December
Playboy magazine,
the issue already looks to
be one of the top sellers
Playboy has ever had.
Did you see it?
Yes, I have seen it.
Did you all see it?
Yeah.
It's the only one
that I got paid for,
I had done hundreds of
magazine covers by that time
and since, but it's the
one that I got paid for,
probably the reason I did it.
One of the reasons that
I did the Playboy layout
was because I'm a feminist
and because I wanted to say,
"Hey, look, you don't have
to be 23 to be in Playboy,
you don't have to be
considered only attractive
if you're very young,
you can be attractive and you
can be sexy if you're older."
And I want other other
women who are older,
who are terrified
of getting older,
it's sick and frightening
how terrified women
are of getting older.
I like this picture
on the cover,
I think it's really
a very good picture
and it's glamorous without
being raunchy and nasty,
John Forsythe from
"Dynasty," loathed it.
He stormed into the
producer's office
in a classic Blake
Carrington rage
yelling "She's a disgrace
to our fine show!"
And just what do you
think you are doing here?
"Dynasty."
Accepting the
award for "Dynasty"
are Diahann Carroll,
Joan Collins-
Things came to head in 1986
when "Dynasty" won the
People's Choice Awards,
John was supposed to accept it
but the presenter
made a beeline for me
and plonked it in my hand.
Thank you, I know I
speak for all of us
when we say how thrilled we are.
John was furious and
hardly spoke to me
for the rest of the season.
And now I'm gonna give
it to the big boss.
You said it.
When it came to renegotiating
my "Dynasty" contract,
I found out that John Forsythe
was being paid much more than
me, I had to take a stand.
I realised that I had never
thought like a businesswoman,
I had thought like a
ding-a-ling sort of artiste,
I cannot be bothered
with things like money.
Now, if I had been a male actor
and had helped pull the
ratings up from nowhere
to number one in the world,
the networks would've been
falling over themselves
to give me parity
without me having to beg.
The British actress,
Joan Collins,
has been offered an extra
20,000 pounds a week
to go on playing the
arch villain Alexis
in the television
soap opera "Dynasty."
So don't underestimate me,
I'm not the same naive
little English girl
fresh out of boarding school
that you met all
those years ago.
I'm a very respected
businesswoman
and if you don't wanna
do business with me,
there are plenty of
other people who will.
I think I learned
a lot from Alexis
and her sharp business acumen.
If she accepts,
it'll take her salary to
1.5 million pounds a year.
Finally.
Peter Holm was a tall,
blonde Scandinavian,
a sort of male version
of Britt Ekland.
I was, believe it
or not, a pop star
when I was about 20 years.
What was
the name of the group?
Me, Peter Holm.
I fell in love with him the
first time I saw him sing.
I did, didn't I?
He didn't speak
actually, you see,
I said "Does this man speak?"
And then somebody
sort of nudged him
and said "Get out
your guitar, Peter,
maybe she'll be impressed."
It worked, it worked instantly.
Big mistake.
After three
failed marriages,
she was resigned
to remaining single
until she saw Peter Holm
across a crowded restaurant
at a London lunch.
Today, Joan believes
there is such a thing
as a marriage made in heaven.
Joan Collins,
who's better known nowadays
as Alexis in "Dynasty"
has married for the fourth
time at the age of 52.
It didn't take long for
the problems to start.
It was almost a
sort of case history
of a very powerful,
successful woman
marrying a sort of man
who was not powerful
and not successful and
not really doing anything
and getting taken over.
He fired my agents and managers,
"You're famous, sweetie,
you don't need any
of these parasites!"
but then took 20% of my income.
"If I'm not here, sweetie,
you'll just go back
to your old ways
and these parasites will
just take and take and take."
None of my friends liked him,
but I stupidly didn't listen.
She's so sweet.
I had allowed the Swede
to totally control
my business life.
His anger was venomous and
whenever he had fights,
he would sneer sarcastically,
"If only people could
see the great Alexis now,
what a pathetic cry baby."
How often
have others exploited you?
Quite a bit.
It must seem pretty pathetic
that a successful
woman in her prime
should allow herself
to be so bullied.
The trouble was, I was
far too stubborn to admit
I'd made a terrible,
terrible mistake.
I faced him with it after
we'd been married, I said,
"You're a sociopath and
if you continue like this,
I will divorce you."
This is after a few
months, he said,
"You will look like the biggest
fool in the world." he said,
"Alexis getting divorced
after four months."
I said "I'm not Alexis, I'm Joan
and I married you because I
thought you were one thing
and you're another, and
if you continue like this,
I'm gonna divorce."
TV star Joan Collins
and husband, Peter Holm
will start airing their
dirty laundry in public today
when they're much publicised
divorce case begins
in a Los Angeles courtroom.
Peter Holm, Miss
Collins' fourth husband,
insists the British
actress should pay him
50,000 pounds a month.
The trial could
generate more heat
than some "Dynasty" scenes.
Earlier this month,
Mr. Holm locked himself
in the Hollywood Hills mansion
he shared with the actress
threatening to shoot anyone
who tried to evict him.
He said, "If you divorce me,
I'm going to destroy you,
I'm gonna take all your money."
And he threatened all of that
and he tried all of that.
Collins' attorney says
it's kind of like
any other divorce,
except his client's name
happens to be Joan Collins.
And finally, the judge allowed
him only $80,000, only?
Ha!
Joan, would
you ever marry again?
No, I said, "I don't need
a husband, I need a wife."
And that was
divorce number four.
Joan took the character
Alexis and ran with it,
it made her the most
watched woman on television
in more than 90 countries.
"Dynasty" had now brought
me fame and fortune
to a staggering degree.
On my last day on "Dynasty,"
I ordered champagne for the crew
and a cake, which said
"It's been the best,
I love you all, Joan."
But I couldn't stop the
tears rolling down my cheeks.
As the nineties dawned,
outsized bling and big hair
were no longer in Vogue
and my life was branching
in a new direction.
I wouldn't have expected
you to be celibate
after we were divorced
anymore than I was.
What?
Ever since RADA, I'd
wanted to play Amanda
in Noel Cowards "Private Lives"
and now I finally had my chance.
The curtain dropped
to rapturous applause
for Joan Collins' first
night on the West End stage,
the star playing the lead in
Noel Coward's "Private Lives,"
received a standing ovation.
I then co-produced and starred
in a series of Coward plays
for the BBC,
with a cast which included
my ex-husband Anthony Newley.
I couldn't help it!
It doesn't matter why you
did it or how you did it,
you did it!
All right, I did!
Tony and I drew heavily upon
our own marital experiences,
no method acting needed here,
but those years
were now behind us,
life's too short
to bear grudges.
Entree!
Ah, lovely!
Oh, look at this.
Welcome to my house, welcome.
That's our little pool.
Oh, look at that pool!
Oh, Joan!
It's nice, isn't it?
Like her sister, Jackie Collins,
Joan has turned her real
life experiences in Hollywood
into a hot new book
called "Prime Time."
This is the work area.
This is where I
write blockbusters
with my "Dictionary of English
Synonyms and Antonyms."
I lie here.
I hop on the telephone,
hello mother.
I said to Katy, who was then 14,
I said, "Are you going
to read "Prime Time?"
She said, "Mummy, I don't
read trash fiction."
The only award
Jane Collins might get
for her first novel is for
a record number of signings,
500 in an hour.
"Prime Time" was a best seller
and so was my next book.
Every time I read this
book, and I have to say,
I've read it a few times,
I think it's such a good book.
My agent then got me a
staggering $2 million deal
to write two steamy
novels for Random House.
I delivered two novels
in a timely manner
and then Random House
decided to sue me.
The actress Joan
Collins took the stand
in a real courtroom drama,
she's defending her
literary reputation
after being sued
by her publishers
for the return of a
million dollar advance.
They say her efforts to
write steamy blockbusters
fell short at the mark.
I was locked into the
biggest fight of my life.
So you tell one story
when you're suing them
and you tell this jury another
when you're trying to keep
from returning the advance,
yes or no?
No, I haven't-
No, no is the answer,
next question.
Don't you have any shame?
Abstain, please, counsellor!
It was absolutely brutal.
The actress seemed
on the brink of tears
after that bruising session
and she turned away from
the courtroom camera.
"Don't let them rattle
you." My friend said,
"Be strong, just
be, become Alexis."
The next day I walked
into the courtroom
and I became Alexis.
Don't get yourself into a
court fight with this woman.
Did you sometimes
call this "Athena?"
Sometimes I called it
"Hitler's mistress,"
it went through so
many different names.
That is a pretty
good Alexis line.
Oh, Mr. Keller,
you're not supposed
to come close to me
without asking permission.
After two weeks, the jury filed
in to deliver the verdict.
A moment of
tension as Joan Collins
awaits the jury verdict
on whether she's broken
her book contract.
Did defendant Joan
Collins fail to deliver
a complete manuscript,
what is the answer?
No.
Was that unanimous?
Yes.
I'd won with a little
help from Alexis.
Justice had been served
and oh, how sweet it was.
The actress Joan
Collins is celebrating
her courtroom victory
over her American
publishers Random House.
That the 62-year-old
actress thanked the jury,
asked by one if they could keep
the copies of her
unpublished blockbuster,
"A Ruling Passion,"
Ms. Collins offered
to autograph them.
11 Men and women who were
all college graduates,
who all, none of them
had seen "Dynasty,"
none of them had read
my books, so they said!
And I think Random House
are trying to teach a lesson
to not only me, but
to other authors.
They don't wanna pay this,
but nobody held a
gun to their head
to give me all that money.
We love you!
Now, could it be fifth time
lucky for Joan Collins?
The 68-year-old
actress tied the knot
at London's Claridge's
hotel today,
her new and fifth husband,
Percy Gibson, is 32
years her junior.
The dress code
was, of course, glamorous,
sadly, a deal with the
celebrity magazine,
precluded a glimpse
of the bride.
Great and again,
hold for me, that's
fabulous, still.
Absolutely love it,
yeah, look at that!
I first set eyes on Percy
Gibson in the year 2000,
he was managing a
theatre production
that I was going to be in.
The fact that I was older
didn't matter to us,
it was giddy, it was fantastic
and Percy and I
fell madly in love.
I, Joan Henrietta Collins.
Do take thee, Percy
Michael Gibson.
Do take thee, Percy
Michael Gibson.
To be my
lawful, wedded husband.
To be my lawful, wedded husband.
We been together ever since,
I finally found my true
soulmate and my husband forever.
Dame Joan Collins
for services to charity.
In 2015, I received one of the
greatest honours of my life,
a dame hood.
Dame Joan Collins,
I can't say it enough,
Dame Joan Collins.
Oh, I love it, thank you.
I know I've had a lucky life,
but I think I've also had
my fair share of disaster
and unhappiness.
And there have been three
miserable, horrible divorces.
Dame Joan Collins.
The terrible situation when
my daughter almost died,
bankruptcy, almost,
not getting any work
as an actor, a lot.
Dame Joan
Collins everyone!
But who wants reality?
There's already too much
of it in today's world.
And as they say
in show business,
that's not what
the public pay for.
That is a wrap for Joan Collins!
I think people like the glamour
girl called Joan Collins.
Off we go!
Even if they understand
glamour is just an illusion.
Is that it?
Are we done?
I don't suppose we could
open the window for a second
or put it on some AC?
'Cause maybe I shouldn't
wear a sweater.
I think maybe I shouldn't
wear this sweater,
does it look okay?
You look great.
But I'm boiling.
'Cause I'm gonna take the books
and when I look at them,
I'm gonna put them here,
is that all right?
All right, we'll
just do that then,
I think I've done
enough of that book,
I was even boring myself.